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Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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The sun's filtering through the window, the chickens are clucking happily, and today feels like a good day.  

I woke up like every day, having a set routine for years now.  The alarm goes off, I sit up, stretch my arms and crack my back, get off of the right side of the bed, layer the blankets according to thickness and design, rest my plushies against the pillow and headboard, and finally check the desk calendar.  It's important that I do every step in order, or my day could be thrown off by the end.  

Grab my pink gel pen, mark off yesterday, and focus on today.  There's a big, pink ring that made Summer 4th a focus point of the season.  

My birthday!  No wonder it feels like a good day.  

A smile made my face all-the-more pleasant to look at in the mirror, next to the closet.   I hung a full-body mirror here, so I can make sure my looks are just right.  

I picked a nice dress for this kind of special occasion, a simple periwinkle dress with a floral lace back, matching colored over-the-knee socks, and white mary janes to match the white headband I chose.  An ever-present silver locket with a photo of my parents in it adorned my neck, along with the marks it left because I slept with it on.  I always have, always had, and always will.  It's the least I can do to honor my parents.  

After getting dressed and ready for the day ahead, my shoes clicked on the kitchen floor with every step and alerted my presence to everyone within.  Which happens to be, well, one person.  

“Mornin’ sunshine.”  Shane stood by the counter, shielding something from my view with his arms.  I’m now about his height, and even taller in the shoes, so I could easily just peek over his shoulder, but I like surprises when I know it'll be a safe and small thing.  

“Good morning Shane!”  

Shane's never fully awake in the mornings, but today his cheerfulness rivals mine.  “How's it feel being 16 now?”

“Like it was when I turned 15, and 14, and 13, and so on and so forth…”  Talking with my hands was all too common when I'm around Shane, making loose circles with one while my head rested on the other.  

He turned around, a less-than-common smile on his face.  “We'll make it special, okay?  I have a feeling that someone's saving up to take a certain someone to Zuzu City…  Shopping sound fun at all?”

“Oh, you know it does.  Thank you Shane!”  My wardrobe is fine, but it never hurts to look for more stationary to write my pen pal with, or more books!!

“You can thank me later.  After breakfast, don't you gotta go to the wizard guy today?”

Ah, yeah.  But I didn't say it that way, instead phrasing it more like, “Yes, I actually do!”  While standing up, I asked, “Can I just take breakfast to go?”  Being polite is never mandatory, but it makes me look better.  

The loud cracking noises of a noncooperative plastic lid being put on a tough bowl stuck through the air for just a second, though that may just be my ears ringing, before he set the bowl on the table.  Well, that lid is definitely one push away from breaking.  

After slipping my phone into the dress pocket, I grabbed the pink bowl and a fork, right before heading out.  Shane called out as I left, “Happy birthday Jas!”

I'm sure it will be. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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The Wizard's tower is a short walk from Marine's ranch, although one I seldom took as a child.  Aunt Marine always told me to avoid the tower, but now, I've been making visits when he requires my assistance or wants to teach me more.

Having brains but being from a small village doesn't leave you with many options.  

I could follow in Penny's footsteps, and become a teacher, but I don't have that level of patience.  Kids are one of the most imperfect things in the world, and I'm not sure I could have that lack of intelligence around me constantly.  

There's always the clinic, but going to school for eight years, just for people like George to consider me an idiot and say they know more isn't it.  Plus, where would I get the money?  I don't even have a proper education that would be recognized by most colleges and medical schools!  Our doctor now came into town as soon as he finished schooling, but that's not an option for me.  Maybe it would have been, if my parents hadn't…  

Mayor is always an option, but I'm simply better than that.  More dignified, if you will.

And then there was Mr. Rasmodius.  

He stepped into the picture after a while of supposedly “observing our education,” whatever that meant.  I'm pretty sure he just looked at our report cards and asked our parents and Penny how that went.  

He could see that I was well beyond Leo and Vincent in terms of neurological power or whatever he said.  As an avid reader, I just happen to know a lot!  But, to back his claims, I seemed to be picking up on the starter concepts with ease, and I'm still eager to learn after three years.  

We've been studying folklore and such for a few months, and today's lesson is supposed to be about Junimos.  I don't know why he chose something so easy, considering I already know a decent amount about them.

Opening the door to the tower, I greeted my mentor with an energy he often compares to a solar essence.  “Good morning Mr. Ra….” 

The floorboard's familiar creak greeted me, along with….

A Jumino.

Well, a happy, yellow junimo with stick arms talking in a language I couldn’t understand, the farmer, who spoke in a way that sounded like a high-pitched mockery of speaking tongues, and Mr. Rasmodius, eyes squinted curiously from across the room and scratching notes down into a journal dedicated to invoking and working with spirits. 

Still nonetheless, a goddamn Junimo.

“Ah, the young wizardess.  Come in, come in.”  Mr. Rasmodius motioned me in, his cape matching his movements slightly.

“Today, I have heard it is a special day celebrated by the mundanes.  You were born on this day sixteen years ago, is that right?”  An eyebrow moved higher as he asked, always curious yet weirded out by the traditions of unenlightened people.

A giggle barely escaped as I nodded, wishes of a happy birthday coming from the farmer.  It’s odd to hear someone switch languages, the vocal tone and pitch often sliding drastically.

“Well, today we have a speaker to give a first hand account of interactions concerning the Junimos.  I figured it would be a better introduction for the first day than reading.”  Well, I am also a complete sucker for new reading material, but his point still stands.  

I sat down on the floor gently, careful to not get a splinter.  Vincent and Leo have pulled one too many splinters out of areas I couldn't reach.  They even play Rochambeau most of the time, and the loser has to help, which I find to be a little ridiculous.

I ate breakfast during the time that the farmer chose to spend with us, a lovely fruit salad.  There's no doubt that Shane asked Marnie about my favorite fruits, because she often will slice up some for me when I'm having a bad day.  It's also obvious that he probably asked the farmer about getting some fruit, because it's very fresh, but hard to get around here.  Coconut, mango, peaches, pineapple, pomegranate, and starfruit, which I consider the best blend.  Listed in alphabetical order, as well.  Perfection is a wonderful trait, and it's nice to know that at least one person here wants to achieve it.  

The presentation was insightful and interesting, even showing how different gems can affect the colors of the creatures.  I don't have many gemstones, but if I ever got my hands on some, it's nice to keep in mind.

And at the end, which was probably around two and a half hours, Mr. Rasmodius motioned me to his book area, with a shelf stuffed to the brim with potions.  While I followed, he grabbed a green potion with bits of leaf shooting up from the bottom upon the sudden movement.

He calmly uncapped the potion, filling the air with the scent of baby fern, moss grub, and caramel-top toadstool, while speaking.  “Take a drink of this, and let the essence of the forest permeate through your body.” 

Taking a swig, I let it do its course, the whole experience being rather nauseating but… interesting.  So many trees.

“Huh, reminds me of that LSD trip Vince and I had in Zuzu…”  

Gaining concerned looks from both adults, I decided to make that my departure.

“Alright, I'm going to head out.  Thank you for the lesson you two!”

Chapter Text

(Jas' POV)

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As their goodbyes hung in the air, the sunlight hit my face once more and the fresh air kicked the sick feeling from the potion out of my gut.

The banners we use for the flower dance were out, blocking the path to the ranch.  The banners have strong associations with un-comfortableness, force, and some unpleasant walks.  Dancing with Vincent was….  Not it.  It's not that he's bad, the dance as a whole is an antiquated practice that forces the bachelors and bachelorettes in town to succumb to the force that is “romance.”  Sure, there may be some romantic feelings for some of them, like Alex and Haley, but it's obvious that many people are ready to just date out of a feeling of need.  If they don't choose that person, who else would it be?

Romance as a whole is scary.  Tie yourself down to one person for your entire life, putting that on the line for a single person that could just as easily ruin or make one worth living?  Yikes.

It's like seeing some married couples compared to the single older folk.  Gus is doing amazing for himself, single as can be and no desire to mingle, while some people waste their lives away while stuck to someone by the law and a hunk of metal bent into a circle.

Wedding rings are a whole concept that throws me through a loop.  Because I'm from the city, I know the traditions outside of Pelican Town, and they still don't make sense to me.  They kind of look like handcuffs.  Or links on a chain.  They can heavily support you, help you function and be successful, or hinder you, and ruin any chance of being anything better than just someone else's half.

What's with being someone else's half?  Is it not good enough to be a whole person on your own?  I've never got that.  People expect me to have my life dictated by the long, arduous process that this valley calls love.  It's as if they want me to have the set life plan of being courted by Vince or Leo, falling for one or the other like a dumbass, giggling with delight as I'm handed a bouquet by one of them, blushing as a mermaid's pendant is gently put around my neck like an executioner slips the noose around a convict's neck, planning my eternity of servitude with nothing but joy, wearing the veil that hides my face at the wedding three days later, let one or the other take me over and see me at my most vulnerable, get pregnant and give birth, and become a stupid fucking unhappy maid with no goals.  No shade to Jodi, although we all see her smiles to Kent getting less and less frequent, and Vincent tells me about the tension in the household.  It's just not the life path I want.  I wanna be appreciated for being me, not for being someone else's property.  

I could easily just climb the colorful banner and go home.  Relax and take a bubble bath, with a book in hand and soft classical music floating through the air.  I find reading in the tub to be one of the most soothing things I can do.  Rose petals from the farmer's garden, candles gently scenting the room, the light being the only thing shining on my book.  

Another option is turn around, and go ask for some extra lessons from Mr. Rasmodius.  I love learning, even if my friends call me a nerd.  Personally, knowledge is an escape from the confides of life.  Of this mortal plane, at least.  It's always good to know more and more, about myself, others before me, and to pave the way for someone that will take on Mr. Rasmodius' path later on.  He says I'm close to it.  

Or even go home and do my nails, pull out and put on my makeup, and feel pretty good about myself.  I can do some killer eyeliner, believe it or not.  Butterfly wings with eyeshadow to fill in the color is my favorite, though a close second is spider webs, with red lip stain making it look as if I'm bleeding out my eye sockets.  The only makeup I ever wear is simply to cover a few scars, stupid little imperfections on my otherwise clear face, though it's fun to experiment.  

Simply, if I am not perfect, I would peel over and die.  Well, that's an overstatement, but it truly feels that way sometimes.  I'm realistic with myself, I know I'm not perfect.  I can only do my best, but that's not what will cut it.  If I'm not good enough, I won't be cared about, simply!  And I'm not ever really good enough, so it's always on me to be the best.  Not my best, the best.

At least, if I was good enough, Shane would have quit the bottle for me, right?

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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After a hefty amount of contemplating my choices, I made my way to the clearing this town seldom uses.  My curiosity always gets a hold of me, trapping my mind until satisfying the curiousness picks the mental lock.  It's only a bit until another thing catches my attention, leaving my mind trapped in the cell, just waiting for me to find out what's got me so stuck so I can pick the mental lock.  The chains always grab my mind and keep it on unknown topics, for good or for bad.  

Hey, curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.  Luckily for me, I am not a cat.  I just so happen to be human.  

As I walked along the stone ledge and got to the clearing, a welcome surprise greeted me.

A few balloons here and there sat in corners created by fences, the sound of chatter and food being consumed paired nicely with dance music, and the smell of the aforementioned food carried by the wind hit me.  The gentle swish of wrapping paper rubbing together, and a paper banner, with something written in flowing, lilac wording.  The banner, adorned with signatures from everyone read…

“Happy sweet 16 Jas!”  

Turning on my heels, I saw Aunt Marnie with arms spread wide, asking silently for a hug as she said it.  Of course I took a few steps to reach her, yelping with surprise as she picked me up and spun me around.  “Aunt Marnie, you're gonna wrinkle my dress!”  I couldn't stop myself from laughing while speaking, the laughs breaking through my words like crackle nail polish.  

Marine set me down, and as the wrinkles on my dress were smoothed out roughly, she spoke a bit.  “Oh my dear, you have no clue how much it's been a joy to see you grow and change into this wonderful person I'm talking to right now.”  She wasn't often sentimental over people, at the most being concerned for someone.  My aunt's a true introvert, mostly spending her time with animals rather than people.  Well, unless your name starts with L and ends in -ewis.  He's the worst kind of animal: a politician.  

That kinda led her to spend loads of time with animals, and not so much with me when I was younger and easier to ignore.  She's gotten better at time management, but it still was a little hurtful, to have animals chosen over you.  At least it wasn't alcohol that time….

But today isn't a day to be sad, so I ignored the thoughts that have pounded feelings of worthlessness into my skull.  With a small smile, I managed to ignore the thoughts and return the compliment with, “and you have no idea how much it's meant all my life that you took me in and raised me as your own!”

The locket was already in my hand before I could think about the instinctive action, reaching up and rubbing the middle of the heart.  I try to not do it much so the color doesn't lack in shine and morph, but old habits die hard.  

“You're too sweet, Jas.  Now go mingle with the crowd, we're all here to see you!”

As I dipped my head in farewell, I wondered why such a big party is being hosted for an event as simple as a birthday.

Mingling with the crowd wasn't all too difficult, just smile, say a hello, talk for a minute, and beeline to someone else.  Rinse, recycle, and repeat.  It's a process you get used to living in a small place like this.  You do your routine, talk to the people that you run into, and you repeat it the entire day.

At least today hasn't been as monotonous.

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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In between the small talk and the birthday wishes, most of which was just common courtesy, some conversations truly made my dimples show with my smile.  

One was Shane, which she knew was coming.  Oddly enough, it was an apology.

Being as tall as him, there was no hiding from my gaze, other than him looking down at his scuffed-up shoes.  Kicking at the dirt wasn't helping that issue as he said, “Jasmine, I know I haven't been the best godfather to you.  But I hope that you recognize that I've tried and got better, you being a major influence.  I'm sorry I haven't been the father I should have been, but…” He kept looking down, now watching ants crawl over the dirt as he choked up a bit.  “I'm so proud of the person you've grown to be.”

Wordlessly, I gave him a hug, even though it was awkward for him, due to his hands being in the pockets of the ratty, old Joja sweatshirt he still had.  

“Thank you Shane.  Were you the one that set up the party?”

“Maaaaaaaybeeeeeee.."

“You're so sweet.  Now, I'm going to go enjoy the party.  Thanks again!”

More people, more faces that blend into each other, and then there was Penny.

My teacher, someone who had one of the biggest impacts on me.  The person who encouraged me to further my education, and to really get my life's path set into motion.  

“Hello Jas, hope you're having a good day.  Enjoying the weather?”

Honestly, my birthday is on a perfect day.  The summer flowers have started to grow, the sun shines beautifully, and despite being summer, it isn't all too hot.  So, of course, “I absolutely am Ms. Penny.  It's nice enough to wear dresses, and not too hot to make me sweat like a behemoth.”  I hate sweating so much, so the hot weather ahead slightly disgusts me.  I'm glad to have my birthday at the beginning of Summer!  

Penny's soft smile is always comforting to see, and her voice is still as soothing as it was when she would read to Vince, Leo, and I as kids.  “I can't believe how much you've done for yourself, you only ever had my education.”

She did not just dismiss herself and her skills like that.  She did NOT do that!

“Ms. Penny!  You are the reason I'm so successful right now!  Don't disregard your teachings as small just because you aren't some fancy teacher in a big school.  Look at how far I've gotten!  And it's thanks to you.  So, well, thank you for my education.”

Oh no, she looks like she's about to cry.  I already knew this was coming, but she needed to hear it!  So of course, I pulled her into a hug, and stayed there until she pulled away, after a few seconds.  “You've grown so much, and I'm excited to see where you go from here.”  

Penny is way too sweet.  

As I made my way over to the food table, where a group of people gathered and talked, something stopped me.  That something, you may ask?

A pair of arms, tightly wrapped around me.

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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The pair of arms wasn't actually a mystery to me, because there's only one person in town that's bold enough to greet me with a hug from behind.  As well as being the only person I trust to do that…

Leo rested his head on top of mine gently - he knows how important it is to not mess up my hair - as he said, “Happy birthday, Blue Jazz.  How're you feeling?”  In the years that he's lived here, he's changed a lot from the island-dwelling boy with a crazy feather cloak.  I was always intrigued by the new kid, but now I know he's simply just a little goofy.  Despite him being so much taller than me, with a slightly deep, husky voice, he's still kind of pictured in my mind like a puppy: adorable, tends to follow me or Vincent around, and gets excited super easily.  Those wide, brown eyes don't help his case either.  It's endearing, quite honestly.  

“Just fine, bird-boy,” I said while leaning back slightly, his clothes feeling as cool as the pink punch, just out of reach, that I wanted some of.  “And you?”  He let out a quiet, happy squawk, never really leaving that trait behind.  We both laughed at the little habit, probably gaining a few stares and whispers.  Considering he has his arms near my waist and I'm not moving away, rumors spread fast.  

He let go after a minute, letting me turn to face him.  First thing I noticed was that he actually did his hair today.  It's been growing out for a while now, Leo likes to keep it long.  He even keeps it longer than mine, which I don't hate.  It was in a nice braid, kind of like Leah's, with bird feathers neatly tucked into it.  Normally, it's just loose and undone, but today is a welcome difference.  

“I'm gonna go talk to everyone by the food table, you're welcome to get some if you want.  You and Linus both, even though I know he doesn't really feel welcome.  It's my party, and I say everyone deserves to eat.”  Frankly, I feel as if this town has failed in terms of making these two feel welcome, Linus more than Leo.  It makes me upset when I think about it, and inspires me to be the change I want to see in the valley.  

Leo, of course, followed me over to the table.  It was a long table of food, much like how we set up a holiday.  A variety of foods were laid out in front of everyone here, most notably an untouched pink cake, plum pudding, and coco-no-no, both mocktails and the real deal.  I'm glad that people paid attention to my favorite foods, along with foods other people would like.  

The hushed whispers and glances in our direction died down as normal chatter resumed.  I grabbed a plate, as did Leo, and we aimlessly talked before running into Robin.  He went to talk to her while I scanned for Vincent, who was talking to Gus.  I'm used to getting snickers and stares when with Leo, but he still isn't, as I can tell from his squinted eyes and body language that shows he's annoyed; crossed arms, foot tapping, reddened face, and such.  

Vincent pointed a bony finger in my direction, to which Gus looked over in my direction before smiling and pointing out, “You must really like that coco-no-no if it's already almost gone!”  

“You know it Gus!”  He's most likely the best chef on this side of the Gem Sea, so I'm glad Vincent is learning from him.  

His smile didn't let up as he continued, “As soon as you're ready for cake, just say the word Miss,” with a motion to the pink cake I noticed earlier.  It honestly looks perfect, an extravagant three-tiered version of the classic Queen of Sauce baked good, whipped frosting with my favorite cherry-flavored heart candies, only good when on the cake, and sliced strawberries on top.  Coconut shavings lightly covered the aforementioned toppings, like snow on Evelyn's flower garden in Winter.

Thinking about it, maybe we should commence with it.  People have probably been waiting around long enough.  “Yeah, let's get to cutting that cake!”

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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The sound of a fork hitting a glass cup - a classic way to get everyone's attention at a party - rang through the air, leaving just the music and the nature around us to fill in.  Although everyone's been using plastic cups, so I'm not sure how he got that.  Maybe from the saloon?  

I stood in the middle of two people, Gus on my right and Vincent, who had put an arm around my shoulders, on the other side.  Looking out at the crowd, I noticed that the farmer and Mr. Rasmodius made it out sometime after I had.  Maybe they were in on the celebration and gave me the presentation as a distraction?  It surely would have been quite a noise to set up the banners and the party scene.  

As everyone crowded around, my gaze met many smiles, most likely reminiscing about the past 16 years, or thinking about going home.  Either way, it's nice that everyone made it out today to see me and celebrate.  

Gus started giving a small speech, which Vincent took over from him after a few minutes.  It was a run of the mill, “she's grown so much, today is special, 16th birthday she aged woooo” type beat, but it was very sweet nonetheless.  It's odd to think that at least half of the people here have known me since I was born.  These people have seen my entire life, from start to present.  It's such a crazy thought, most of these people have shaped my growth and existence.  If I had lived in the city with my parents, I would be a completely different person than what I am now.  If I didn't have Penny's teaching, Marnie's guidance, Shane's support, and every single influence around me, who would I be?

The first few notes of that damned happy birthday song pulled me out of my thoughts, the birthday candles already lit and casting a small light on my hand.  The sun couldn't get it in the shade, so the fire light took the chance instead.  

As the song ended, I let out a gentle breath to blow the candles out, and wished for something simple - but why would I tell you?  Wishes are supposed to be secret.  

Gus started cutting the cake, serving everyone after I got my slice.  Cake just tastes better when you know it was baked for you!  Balancing on the fence, I took my chances sitting up there instead of on the grass.  Grass stains are the literal worst, especially on adorable clothes like this.  

The two boys my age sat down in front of me, eating the cake with glee.  Well, Leo is at least.  He started on his second slice when I finished my first.  What can I say, I like savoring the taste!  “You eat like a rabid wolf sometimes, Leo.  I sincerely hope you have napkins.”  

He indeed did, pulling some out of his pocket and handing them out to both of us while saying, “Three steps ahead of ya, Blue Jazz.”  I find it sweet that he calls me by the name of a flower, his reasoning being that my hair's poofiness reminds him of one.  I try to get the static out of my hair to avoid it, but it always creeps back in, so I've just given up.  

Once I got my second slice of cake, putting a second plate over it to save and eat later, Shane approached me with a question.  “Ready to open your presents, sunshine?”

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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Normally, birthday celebrations are public knowledge, but gifts are really only given between friends and family.  Penny took the forefront of giving the gifts out, but not before doing a little speaking of her own.  We all yet again crowded around a table, me sitting on a stool and everyone else either standing in the back of the crowd or sitting in the front of it.  

Penny's voice was calming, a stark contrast to the vibrant energy the event had given off.  “Hello everyone… Uhm, so…  I know some of you may be confused as to why we're doing a big celebration, let alone giving gifts.  In the valley, most people don't live here long enough to see their 16th birthday.  They either move with their parents before it happens, or move in after it has happened.  So, as a way to honor the memories we all have of Jas, we're gathered here today.  And the next time she'll be raking in gifts like this, it'll be her wedding day!”

Laughs came from the crowd, genuine, hearty laughs, but I caught eyes with the only other person whose laugh was rather awkward.  Leo and I shared a look, smiles on our faces but eyes that didn't reflect as much.  

“Alright, so without further ado, let's get on with it!”  I noticed the table with gifts and cards, right under the banner wishing me a happy birthday, as I arrived in the clearing, so getting to see what was in them would satisfy some back-burner-of-the-mind curiosity.  I was really glad that there were no large gifts, hoping no one spent too much money on the gifts.  

As presents and cards were opened, each person gave a tiny explanation as to why.  Many knew about the shopping trip Shane talked about earlier, so as a group effort, people gifted gold and gift cards to my favorite stores in Zuzu City.  Even though some people consider those the laziest gifts possible, it's kind that people care enough about wanting me to like my gift that they simply let it be my choice.  Cards for bookstores from Abigail's family, a few for boutiques from Haley and Alex, which by the way, a tad creepy albeit well-meaning from him, a record shop certificate from Sam, and a few people just gifting money.

Those gifts were nice, but the sweetest ones were the physical gifts.  Emily hand-made a resin-casted blue jazz crown for me, courtesy of Evelyn's garden.  I immediately put the flower crown on, using my white headband to pin it down.  It even matches my outfit, which is a huge bonus.  Marnie went the extra mile, giving me a pair of opal earrings I pointed out on my last trip to Zuzu City.  She wasn't the only one to give me jewelry though, because Clint gave me a handmade jade ring.  It fit perfectly, which was a nice surprise.  Maru and Penny made me a battery-powered homemade reading light in the shape of a fairy rose, pretty and useful.  And speaking of fairy roses, the farmer gave me twenty seeds, so I could grow a mini-garden once Autumn rolls around.  Leah painted a field of them, a pretty scene that I'm excited to hang in my room.  

While I hate saying one gift is better than the others, because the thought behind all of them is super sweet and special to me in their own ways, the one that takes the cake just so happens to be Elliott's gift.  He gave me a printed copy of his latest story, and gifted me the opportunity of being his first reader.  Considering I've read almost everything in the library, and have resorted to pirating books online, it's a godsend to have new reading material.  Plus, he said I can discuss the book with him anytime, so I finally have someone to talk to about my readings, besides Penny, who often has to calm me down from my crazy ramblings.  

Robin looked over at Vincent and Leo, asking a small question.  “Boys, did you perhaps have gifts for her?  You two should especially.”  Considering they're my closest friends, it's essentially customary for them to have one.  While I know she knows that Vincent has one for me, she gave Leo a bit of a glare.

Vincent was quick to point at a box under the table, explaining that he didn't want the gift getting crushed by everyone else's.  Once he said that, all eyes were on Leo.  While he's adjusted to life in the valley, he still gets unnerved when he's stared at, because it makes him feel judged.  He knows that he's not accepted as much as he should be, and sometimes it gets in his head.

I could tell he's overthinking it, because his face was kind of red, and his eyes were a little wider than normal.  A little anxious.  “I have one, but it's waiting in the treehouse…  It sounds lousy, but I swear, it's there.”  

To my surprise, and then annoyance, people started chuckling at that.  Leo was quick to defend us, a little startled as he exclaimed, “It's n-not like that!”  His face was immediately buried in his hands, his fingers gripping the stray bits of hair that fell in reach, and I just feel bad for him when the townsfolk tease us like that.  It doesn't affect me, but he still isn't used to it.  

“Leave him alone y’all, it's not funny to embarrass people like that.”  I had to speak up, the poor guy was just trying to give a genuine explanation.  It's really not amusing to see him like this, especially with all of the judgment he already faces.  

“Alright, alright, sorry Leo.”  Marnie stepped in and apologized, even though I KNOW she's going to point out our hug from earlier.  Well, not if she forgets about it.  I hope she does, because it's always so annoying when she and Shane team up to bother me about the romantic life they wish I had.  

Once the embarrassment and party both died down, I pulled Leo and Vincent aside.  “Do you guys feel like hanging out?  I kind of want to just see my people after all that buzz.”  Sure, it's fun to be around everyone sometimes, but it's insanely tiring.  Too many people drains my social battery too quickly.  

Leo squawked in agreement - something he does if he's too embarrassed to speak - and Vince teased, “Is this just so you can get Leo's gift?”  We don't ever hang out at his house, because his dad gets pissed when we're all making noise in the house, and Shane would kill them both if he caught them in my room.  But if Marine caught them, she'd probably mention there's condoms in her room.  I wonder why she can't take the hint…

With our agreement, and Shane saying that he'd bring my gifts home, we set out to the treehouse.  Who knows what awaits there?  Well, onward! 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

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While the party was fun, I'm happy to get away from all the goddamn people.  Considering it was Jas’ party, every single fucking adult asked when I'm gonna make a move on her.  It bothers me an insane amount when people ask, because we've literally never shown any interest in each other.  She's shown more interest in Leo than in me for fuck's sake!  And that's…  

Anyways, as we made the familiar walk to Leo's treehouse, leftovers from the party in-hand, we walked in silence.  The awkward moment in the air, thanks to Robin, left an odd tension in the air.  As the certified funny friend, I can't let that happen.  Who certified me?  Me, duh.  

I wanted to make it sound casual, so I simply said, “Hey Leo, I think we should make a deal.”  

Leo looked at me, an eyebrow raised in curiosity as I spoke.  “Uh… what is that deal?” He asked it with some hesitance, which made me laugh a little.  My idea is just really funny, okay?

“For every time an adult asks us if we're gonna get with Jas, we should kiss in front of them.”  

Jas, who was sipping on another fucking coco-no-no, spit her drink out at my funny idea.  But as soon as she started speaking, it was obvious that she didn't find it so funny.  “Vince, are you insane?!  We live in a small village, where some people would smite you on SIGHT for something like that!  You know how angry Lewis was when he caught you in my dress!  If Alex ever saw you, kiss your ass goodbye!  If Kent ever saw you….  Sometimes, I wonder if you think.  Yes, in general, but mostly about your shenanigans.”   

Yeah, right….  Like shit man, she might be right, but it was funny!  

In all seriousness, I know Jas is right.  And I know she's worried, but it's still disheartening to be reminded about how old fashioned some people are in this town.  Fucking old people, and not in the Marnie and Lewis way.  

I didn't need to voice that, though, because we arrived at the treehouse.  It's nothing like what it was when Leo moved in, now having multiple stories, heating, running water, and being fully furnished.  

Even though Leo still lives in a goddamn tree, which is sick as hell, it looks like any old bedroom.  Well, aside from the inside of a fucking tree.  His bed is super soft, so Jas always chooses to sit up on it, while I take the bean bag, and Leo sits on a rug.  The bean bag is by the bed, so when Leo came back upstairs to give her the birthday gift, I noticed something that would make her flip her shit.

As she stood up, I noticed a small, yellow-brown stain on the hem of her dress, like the color of bug guts smeared on the sidewalk.  But I didn't point it out, because she would, as I stated before, let the hell of her mind loose.  And it's a little painful to see her get so damn worried about something as small as a stain.  

I looked up to see what she was fawning over, and yeah, it's a pretty nice gift.  A wind chime, made with various colors of sea glass.  “I've been collecting pieces since I can remember, but I never had a good use for them.  And some of those are super rare, like that red piece.  I figured you would like it, so…  Here.”

Jas started thanking him profusely and did.  Not.  Stop.  “... Leo, this is the sweetest…" Blah, blah, blah, yadda yadda yadda, yack yack, blah blah blah blubububuuubububuuubuhuubuuuhubuuh, "... Thank you, so much.”  She finally stopped after that last thanks and sat back down, admiring how the colors lit up when put through sunlight.  Leo joined her on the bed, putting an arm around her, with his hand resting just above her hip.

While I know they aren't a “thing,” I strive to have what they do.  And not with Jas. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

We hung out for a few more hours, but soon enough it started getting boring, so I headed out.  Well, not boring per se, but not as fun.  Vincent normally hangs around for a while after I leave, so I walk alone.  I'm not scared honestly, it's a safe place, and I can run fast in heels if need be.  Walks alone are rather peaceful, listening to the sounds of nature and nothing else.  

The long walk gave me time to think, but I decided to give it a rest.  No thoughts, head empty.  It's relaxing to just walk in the woods and hear noises.  A babbling creek, soft rustling of the greenery around, animals scurrying, bugs skittering, and cows moo-ing.  

As I opened the door and stepped inside, Marnie greeted me with, “Hey dear, leftovers are in the fridge, and the gifts are on your bed.”  

“Thanks Aunt Marnie!"  I went into the kitchen and grabbed some of the stuff from dinner, and popped it into the microwave.  Mashed potatoes, steak, and dinner rolls on the counter.  As I microwaved the former two, just so it'd heat up, I took a piece of bread goodness and took a bite.  But a girl can't enjoy a dinner roll in peace, can she?

“Sooooooo, anything happen at Leo's house?”  Ugh, this conversation happens every time we hang out.  Marnie seems to be encouraging the idea of a relationship, while I can't help but push it farther away.  It's as if the adults of this valley think my worth is based on relationships!

I didn't even bother responding, eating and making long strides to my room while giving my reply in passing, a simple, well, nothing.  “Good night, Aunt Marnie.”  

“Happy birthday, Jasmine,” was the last thing I heard from her that day.  Entering my room and shutting the door always feels like a huge relief, like a wave of sweet solitude washing over me.  Almost immediately, I went to my bed and started putting gifts where they belong: gift cards and money in my wallet, jewelry in my jewelry box, the flower crown on my head hung with the other hats, reading light on my nightstand, seeds on my desk to deal with later, Vincent's gift where it goes, and the wind chime hanging outside my window.  

Sorting everything into the perfect and correct spots took around an hour.  All that was left was Elliott's book.  I'll start on the first chapter to get a feel for it once I get into a pair of pajamas.  A simple nightgown, and a silk sleep mask to match.  Taking off the footwear was a blessing to my feet, being a bit sore from all the standing and walking of the fun day.  Headband next, hung up with all the other hair accessories.  And then the dress.  As I slipped it off and hung it on a hanger, to put it in the laundry room tomorrow morning, things seemed fine.  Slipping on the nightgown, sleep mask on my forehead, everything was alright.  But as I sat down on the bed, I looked at the dress, and thought something was off.  As I got closer, investigating the edges of the skirt park, I saw it.  A horrid stain, yellowish-brown like vomit, about the size of my thumbprint.  

Oh Yoba, what if someone noticed it?  They'll think I'm sloppy.  Or that I don't care about my appearance, or maybe even that I'm just disgusting.  I'm not any of that though!  If people think that of me, they'll say something to someone, who will say something to others, and eventually the whole town will start to agree.  Then, people will start to judge me, and judgment leads to hatred.  Is everyone going to hate me?!  I'd hate me too frankly, people reflecting our town like that would be a true travesty.  And if people hate you, they don't want you around.  Oh my, they'd kick me out of Pelican Town.  

Of course, I can't have that stain stay.  I got up with the dress, and went to the laundry room.  Upon entering, I hung it up and went to work, making my normal solution for stain-removal.  One part vinegar, two parts cold water, one part detergent, and a dash of salt.  Mix well, and apply to the area with a toothbrush by scrubbing.  I don't know whether it was the noise I made from getting the ingredients, shaking it all together, or scrubbing it into the dress, but the door opened, and the shadow of Shane hung in the doorway.

“Sunshine, it's midnight.  Why are you..?  Oh.”  He flicked on the lights, letting the room be dimly lit by the fading light bulbs that hung from the ceiling.  “You don't need to worry about stains so much, they happen.  It's alright.  Try to relax for once, okay?”

“But Shane, if people see a stain on my dress they'll hate me and want me to leave and never come back.”  Even though I said it clear as day, he blinked a few times, and looked at me, bewildered almost.  What's so perplexing about my statement?

Shane moved closer, turning me to face him by placing his hands on my shoulders.  Hey, I'm trying to clean off the stain!  “Jas, you're the queen of jumping to conclusions.  I'll take care o- are you… crying?”  

“No.”  

“Well, why are there tears running down your face then?”  He brought a gentle, yet rough-feeling hand to one cheek, and then the other, wiping what now felt like tears.  Since he mentioned it, I finally realized it.  I wonder why that is, it's not as if I just realized the entire town might hate me overnight.  

“Shane, does everyone hate me?”

He looked at me for a second with utter confusion, before sighing and trying to assure me with, “Jasmine, I have never heard something more stupid.  If everyone hasn't hated me for how many stains I have on my clothes, they won't hate the town's poster-child for neatness and orderliness for a small, barely-noticeable stain.”  

“Bu-”  He shut down my words with a simple finger over my mouth, the classic shushing motion.  Sometimes he acts like a sassy mom, which is funny, when you're not the one on the receiving end of the sass.  

Shane looked at me with tired eyes, not taking anything he considers bullshit.  “Sunshine, it's past ten, don't ever trust your brain after ten p.m.  It'll lie to you and make you think some dumb shit.  We need to talk in the morning though.  Now get to bed, I'll clean your dress.  Good night Jazzy.”  Hasn't called me that since I was little.  

He didn't really give me the choice, gently guiding me out of the laundry room and closing the door.  Well, I might as well go to bed.  But why does he need to talk to me?  I thought it'd keep me up all night, wondering and worrying about what mistake I could have made to need to have a talk.  But as soon as my head hit my pillow, I was out, like a candle in the wind.  The last thing I heard was the wired sea glass, gently clinking together as the breeze moved them. 

Clink, clink, clink. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

The sun's shining through my curtains, the chickens are making a ruckus, but today feels…. Off.  Yesterday, I awoke to a good feeling, but today, it just wasn't so.  Oftentimes, I just ignore the offset feeling of the morning.  I'm too sleepy to truly grasp the energies that surround the morning, as everything wakes up and adds chaos to the world.

After doing my normal routine, quite like a ritual at this point, I figured now's as good a time as any to start on Elliott's book.  Reading is a nice way to truly wake the mind.  Plus, I wanted to do some last night, before realizing I had that horrid stain on my dress.  Simply vile!  

Going out to the kitchen, I turned the electric kettle on to make tea, put an everything bagel into the toaster, and went to check on the dress.  Today, I decided on a loose-ish, long-sleeve olive-green jumpsuit, with my signature bow and black platform boots.  Comfortable shoes are overrated, I feel oddly fine in boots and heels.  

The laundry room was really just a closet that we stuck our washer and dryer in, added a few curtain hangers, actual hangers, and voíla, a laundry room.  It's compact, easy, and a nice place for a quiet moment.  Well, aside from the thumping of a washing machine, as if it has a heart.  

The dress was hanging to dry, the stain essentially a shadow of what it was.  But that's not good enough.  I made a bit of the mixture and scrubbed it again, letting it set for a while.  If the stain isn't gone, I don't know if I could wear it again, unless I re-hem the dress and make it a tad shorter to hide the little, hugely off putting stain.  What can I say, my reputation is of utmost importance!  

The tile made my presence known throughout the house, the only downside of the shoes being how loud they click on the tile and hardwood of the house.  That's most likely why Shane was in the kitchen, waiting for me to come out of the laundry “room”.  He did say we need to talk…  

Remembering that, it suddenly felt a bit hard to breathe.  As if someone set a marble at the bottom of my throat, just big enough to block my windpipe.  Taking a deep breath, to make sure I'm still breathing, I just kinda ignored him and poured the boiled water into my favorite mug, with a hibiscus herbal tea bag in it.  Bagel is ready, spread on a bit of cream cheese, and that's breakfast.  At least, breakfast on the days Marnie doesn't make it.  

As the tea soaked, I sat at the table and started on Elliott's book.  An immersive, wonderful tale about a fantasy world, filled with flora of all ages and fairies, suffering from a terrible plague.  The writing was flowy and descriptive, with a flourish that suited poets more than anything.  I wonder if he's dabbled in the land of poetry?  I would enjoy writing poetry with him, honestly.  

I got through the prologue, and then about a chapter and a half before Shane brought up his statement from the previous night.  As I took a sip, my new jade ring clinking gently on the handle and he started gently with, “Jas, are you feeling better?”  I don't like where this is going, even if I have no clue what path this conversation is taking.  

“Yes, I am.  Just cut to the chase, what do we need to discuss?”  I'm rather impatient when it comes to serious discussions, never wanting them to overstay their reluctant welcome.  And I absolutely hate when it's prolonged, dragged-out, and overall just annoying.  

Shane drew a breath in, clasped hands on the table in front of him as he began, “Well, sunshine…”  He sighed, almost like a huff, and continued.  “Have you ever… considered seeing a therapist?”  He looked hesitant to speak, but didn't stop.  “I think it'll help you manage your perfectionism and overthinking, plus give you a place to be honest with yourself about your issues.”  

I almost choked on my tea when he asked the question, unsure of how to respond.  Therapy?  But I'm fine!  I don't overthink things!  And what perfectionism?  My need to be perfect?  Psh, I'm FINE!  I'm alright!  And if I ever did need therapy, I could get a self-help book, and work my issues out myself.  I don't need someone prying in my business, taking thousands of our gold just to give me a pill or a stupid piece of advice that I could figure out myself.  

Because I didn't reply, he just kept on talking.  “I talked to my therapist about it, and he said it would be a good idea for you to look into therapy as well.  It's helped me a lot with my issues, and it could help out with your problems as well.  I just want the best for you, Jasmine.”  

Okay, backtrack, back pedal so fast.  Did he just compare his addiction to the very thing that's making me stay successful?  And I don't have issues, it's simply just an overactive mind!  Where would we even get the money to get me therapy?  We could use that money for the chickens!  For paying rent!  For anything else!  And I am honest with myself, because I do not HAVE problems!  Plus, he talked about it with his therapist before me?  Really?!  

After a moment of silence, the only sounds around us being the chickens and my book closing, I stood up, moving the chair out of my way, and just looked down at him.  He really compared an ADDICTION to a MINDSET.  A perfectly healthy mindset.  

So, I told him all of that.  

“How dare you compare your addiction, something that has severely hindered your success in life, to something that's gaining mine.  I'm fine , Shane!  And you talked about it with your therapist, but who's paying for that?  How would you even pay to send me to therapy, huh?  Considering you're technically unemployed, that'd be pretty hard to do.  And I know you feel too guilty already about Marnie supporting the both of us to ask her, so it's not like you could even send me to it!  I haven't considered it, because I don't need it.  If you wanted the best for me, maybe you shouldn't have favored the bottle over me for half of my childhood!  Do you know how damaging it still is to have heard you say that you didn't want to live?  How much it fucked me up to see you in a hospital bed after your half-assed suicide attempt?!  No, you don't.  You won't ever know what it's like to lose two parents, and almost lose a third .”

I grabbed my book, phone already in pocket, and went to the door.  Shane was already attempting to sputter an apology, but I'm not gonna take any of his shit.  In the opened doorway, I turned to face him one last time.  “Sorry won't rid me of the nightmares that your shit caused, Shane.  Just quit while you're ahead.”  And with that, I left. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

I didn't think much about where I was going, just that I was going somewhere.  Somewhere away from the ranch.  Marnie will probably get my ass when I get back, and I'll have that thrown right back at me on a silver platter, if she even cares to hear about what happened.  It was uncalled for, but at the same time, it's odd that he's worrying about me now, despite me thinking like this because of some of his actions.

Now, don't get me wrong, I don’t fault him for anything he's been through.  But…  Well, he is partly at fault for it.  Even if it's harsh to say, he is the one that picked up the bottle.  That didn't do anything to help himself.  It's mean, but the truth hurts a lot of the time.  I said some mean things, yes, but there's truth in it.  I hate lying to people, and half-truths still feel dirty, so I always try to be honest.

Letting my feet carry me to where they wanted, I decided to simply look around, maybe my mind would come up with a clear goal if I had an idea of where I'm going.  There's a few places I could, but my feet passed the ones on my path.

Leah's cottage, an odd place that I've spent some time.  Observing her art, having cups of homemade juice, picnics with Leah on the days that we find each other by the river, bringing blocks of goat cheese…  A place of many memories, more as I grew older and could relate more to the woman that lives in the cottage.  

Vincent's house came and went from my view.  I've spent so many nights on the couch, a ton of sunsets on the roof, a few sunrises fighting to stay awake, countless days playing and having fun.  It's a place of many memories.  Happy, and…

Haley and Emily's place, even.  I still have some of my favorite pieces of clothes from her, prototypes of the items she sells now for her junior's collection.  She took the same path Leah did for selling art, online to people outside of our little town.  And with the other sister, learning how to do my makeup was surely an experience, to say the least.  

Eventually, I felt my feet slightly sink with each step.  The beach was where I ended up.  Book in hand, I figured now was as good a time as any to go talk to Elliott, the writer on the beach.  Often, it's very fun to see what people think in the beginning, and how their thoughts change in the middle and end.  To know you're subverting expectations and making people think, getting readers lost in your little world of parchment and ink, it must be a truly euphoric experience.  To know your hard work makes people feel better.  

I knocked on the cabin door, and although most people here don't knock or just show up unexpectedly, I always try to show respect.  The only times I go into a room or house without is if it's Leo's house or Vincent's bedroom.  Also, Elliott's an odd man, and I would hate to disturb him during a writing session. 

Though luckily, all he shouted was, “Come in!”  I gently opened the door in response, letting the creaking hinges do the talking for me.  Turning around from the piano, Elliott seemingly did a double-take as he saw me close the wooden door.  “Oh, I didn't expect you to visit so soon.  Have you already read through a few chapters?”  

I nodded my head, unsure of where to sit down, my feet a bit sore still from all the walking yesterday.  Just because they're comfortable does not mean I'm immune to the human body's natural reactions.  Well, maybe someday…

“Well, make yourself comfortable, I'm sure you have quite a few thoughts buzzing in your head.  An avid reader such as you always looks into every single word, as if double-meanings lie at every corner,” he mused aloud, this not being the first time I've come to his cabin with thoughts about his stories.  

I decided to sit by the table, the chair wobbling a little under my weight, even if it's not much.  “Ah, I suppose a visit to Robin is due sometime before the year ends…”  Elliott has a tendency to think vocally, but I'm not complaining.  He has the mind of a writer, but the voice for an audio-reader.  Leah and I have attempted to convince him of doing it for one of his books without much success, but I have a feeling that we're close to persuading him of it.  

“First of all, what inspired you to write about such a topic?  Considering your novels before this have been a murder-mystery, a dystopian-romance, and a comedic sci-fi book, a fantasy book is an interesting path to take.”  I’m always interested in what inspires writers’ premises for stories, no matter how mundane or intricate the reasoning may be.  

The faint trace of a smile left a stain on Elliott's face as he recalled, “I was walking in a field of flowers a few Summers ago.  The farmer had an entire field dedicated to them, and it was almost magical.  Poppies - even if I personally hate them - giving off an almost dizzyingly sweet smell, giant sunflowers as high in the sky as the very star they're named after, and summer spangles, in all shades of the rainbow, as far as flowers go.  And I swear, out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw a fairy, sitting in the middle of a poppy.  It was only a bee, but that was the fairy world part.”

His descriptions always had me hooked, head resting in my hands, and elbows on my knees to support the weight.  It's a common pose I assume when giving my undivided attention to something, or someone.  Getting lost in the world of descriptions and books is a trait I picked up from Penny, so it's not surprising that Elliott's words manage to keep me captivated.

I hung onto every word that left his mouth, soaking in the backstory to appreciate the actual story more.  He went from why he wrote the story to certain characters and relationships, but I didn't even attempt to stop him.  “....  And as for the familial relationship between Lithbet and Drarred…”  

“Oh yeah.  Them.” 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

Elliott set down the papers that now littered his bed, head snapping in my direction at the sudden words.  “Well that was certainly a reaction of sorts…  May I lend an ear to your troubles?”  His gaze was more quizical than anything, with a certain type of un-pinpoint-able curiosity settled into his tone.  

“It's not really a problem, it just reminds me of Shane and I.  You are aware of the fact that I lost my parents before moving here, correct?”  As he shook his head, lips forming some quick condolences, meant to comfort a wound that's been healed over already.  

It still surprises me that some don't know, considering how open I am with the fact.  Because it's simply just that, a truth that I'll speak to the moon and back, so to speak.  Yeah, some nights I miss the way my dad would tuck me into bed and read bedtime stories, or the way my mom would pick me up and throw me in the air, and I frequently wonder what it would be like if I had lived with them, but it's not like life is bad because of it.  I'm still finding success, and have a support system… Shit, the exact same system that I told off earlier.  

“Don't bother, it doesn't hurt much anymore.  But…  Shane and I kinda talked earlier, and…”  How do I say this without sounding like a complete dick?  Well, might as well try… “He said something that really grinds my gears, and I let some pent-up emotions loose.”  That sounds better than ‘I yelled at him and brought up things out of his control like his addiction and depression getting in the way of raising me', right?  There's no way Elliott would decipher that.  

Silence swirled us two, just the wind blowing outside of the shack until he asked, “Did you throw his addiction in his face?”  

Well then.

“Uh…. Perhaps…..  But it was in relation to the way he raised me, and that was one of the main points I was making.  I kinda got mad that he was just now trying to chop down a tree habit that he kinda planted the seed of, when I was a little kid.  I know that he didn't really have control over himself but….”  Wait, I'm talking about issues.  Silly Jas, that's for people that are experiencing actual problems!  “Sorry, let's go back to Lithbet and Drarred.   What's up with those two?”  

Elliott looked at me with a bit of confusion.  “So you're going to leave me hanging off of a cliffhanger?  Ah, I believe that's understandable, it takes a while to open up to people, even if you know someone for a while it can be hard to trust people.”  His face had settled to a more neutral look, him detailing into thought again.  

I just want to know one thing.  “How did you figure out what I had done so quickly?”  I know Elliott and Shane know each other, but it's not as if they're close friends at all.  At the most, they laugh at Harvey's anxious behavior while drunk together.  

He moved his head towards the direction of town, mostly in reference to the saloon while he said, “He and Marnie have opened up about their worries as you grew up.  Being drunk really lets everything out of your mind.  Shane always felt so guilty, yet there wasn't much he could do about it.”  

“I know, I know,” I flippantly responded as my hand flipped slightly, as to dismiss the explanation I've heard so many times.  I checked my phone as silence creeped in with the salty air, seeing multiple missed calls and unread texts from multiple people.  Vince, Marnie, Shane…  Oh Yoba.  “I've seemed to create a stir with some people, so I'll be heading out.  Sorry that we hadn't discussed very much, I have many thoughts about the first few chapters.”  

“Oh, don't apologize Jas!  You're free to come here anytime, to discuss whatever's on your mind, whether that be the book or something else.”  He smiled with a certain glow about him, which makes me wonder if he exfoliates with the sand outside.  He's the type to have a skin routine, which is nice to see in a guy.  

The chair squeaked as I gently pushed it back in, leaving everything as it was.  Book in hand, phone in pocket, and a pep in my step, the quick distance from the table to the door only took a few strides.  

“Thank you Mr. Elliott, I just may take you up on that offer.”  

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

It's just another shitty night out of the house, like normal.  At this point, days start blending and life's monotonous.  The only thing that separates my days and makes life feel like I'm living it is the different interactions within the Saloon.

Emily started selling her clothes online, and she's making a decent living, so she quit her job at the Stardrop.  Ever since then, Gus needed some help, so I decided to take her job.  It's not a bad job, getting paid when I still live with my family means I have a lot of extra money now.  It's a nice thing to have, actually.  The gold, but I guess the job is okay as well.  

I've only worked for a month, since my 16th birthday, but I've still seen benefits from it.  The money, getting to socialize with the townspeople, and getting out of the house more.  Plus, seeing people embarrass themselves while drunk is always a bonus, even if it's not as frequent as some other things.  Another nice part is that Kent doesn't come to the saloon as often, but that's a discussion for another day.  

Today, though, I didn't have the same type of luck.  Just the normal Friday night crowd, but it's still a little odd seeing all these people I respect while drunk.  Or, at least, have been taught to respect my entire life.  Willy, just getting a drink after a long day of work, Robin and Demetrius dancing to the little tune on the jukebox, Leah at her normal table with a bottle of Stardew Valley red, Lewis and Marnie making heart eyes at each other, Pierre, letting himself have one break a week, Elliott sipping on something strong, Pam and Clint in their normal spots, Abigail, Sebastian, and Sam - the A.S.S. trio, as I like to call them - in the game room as the farmer chatted with them, Shane on my left as I dried a glass off, and…  Kent.  

“Hey kid, you okay?”  I looked at the person addressing me, a sober face in a crowd full of people, ranging from buzzed to wasted.  Shane leaned on the bar of this bar, most likely noticing a stray glance in the direction of a patron.  It's not really his business to pry though, and I'm on the clock, so…

Shane's an odd one.  He's been a familiar face all my life, especially considering he's my best friend's godfather.  Despite not stepping up his game until getting therapy, he's been around, which is more than Jas’ parents, technically.  And more than Kent, from when I was two to almost seven.  Yet, he's always been more of a shadow than an actual person.  Moping in his room, sipping on something in the saloon, eating handfuls of shredded cheese in the ranch's kitchen at midnight when Jas and I can't sleep, and more things that just make him seem odd .  

But he was there more than Kent, I'll give him that.  Sure, Kent was at war, but things change people and it's kinda like I lost him, and also got this husk of a man back.  It's not like I lost him in the same way Jas lost hers, but war truly changes people.  Not just those involved, but those infected by the disease that is war, such as civilians and families of soldiers.  I've heard the whispers of others as we passed by when my dad wasn't around, deeming her a “soldier widow” and such.  People are really two-faced in this town sometimes, praying for his safe return but then speculating how long he had left in the trenches.  

Shane set a bottle of seltzer water down, which jerked me away from my thoughts.  “Vincent?  You okay?”  Nothing was out of the ordinary, although Shane actually talking to me was a little odd.  He normally just drinks his sparkling water and does whatever he silently does.  Most likely just thinking, Jas had to have picked the habit up from someone.   

Honestly?  Do I even have the balls to answer honestly?   

“Yeah, I’m fine.  Why the hell are you asking, respectfully?”  

I guess not, fucking coward.  Though it's not like the one person that's open with going to therapy and their issues is the best to tell….  Actually, that means he knows how to help and such.  Am I just the dumbass one here?

He looked at me with uncertainty, and then his eyes shifted away, almost as much of a sneaky bastard as him.  “Well, the looks you're giving the other side of the room say otherwise.  We're both here every night if you need someone to confide in.  Tuesday nights never seem to be busy.  I know you wouldn't ever talk to Jodi about it, there's just no way.”  Yeah, no fuckin’ way I'm talking to my mom about my issues!

I picked up another glass to start drying it off as he offered, not too keen on taking said offer.  If I need to talk to someone, I just put on my headphones, listen to some music, and I no longer need to open up.  

Music is like a solution to my problems.  The loud stuff is mind-numbing, the calm shit is soothing, and when I pop a tune on my problems melt away like butter on fresh-popped popcorn, a treat I rarely indulge in nowadays.  Music is like an escape, it's a door that I can slam in the face of my issues.  It helps the mood and boosts it too, no matter how I'm feeling.  Music is the shit!  Especially when I'm feeling like shit.  

As the door opened, I greeted whoever it was and started checking on tables, taking orders and making the usual rounds.  The days melt together and it's all routine, different voices all swirling into one big noise of chatter and footsteps and…

Soon enough, my head hit the pillow, another sweet escape that no one can take away from me.  As sleep took my consciousness, I didn’t really think.

Today was a day, just like yesterday, and will be a day just like tomorrow.  The same cycle continues. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Some days later - at this point it's hard to keep track - the smell of French toast and sausage links greeted me as I woke up.  While I hate that someone opened my bedroom door when I was sleeping, especially without my permission, it's whatever I guess.  

I slept in yesterday's clothes, the smell of beer and pizza almost woven into the fibers.  Normally, feeling a bit tired is just a part of the job, but today my bones feel like lead.  It's so hard to get out of bed sometimes, and I could just sleep the entire day away.  But breakfast is being made, and Mom is such a good cook…

I got up to shut the door, got dressed, and ventured out into the kitchen.  Sam sat at the table, with Mom by the stove.  The scene reminds me of before Kent came back, such good days.  I miss times like that, even if Mom having a bit of extra help is nice.  

Breakfast was ready soon enough, and Sam was eager as ever to start digging in as soon as Mom served the food.  I wish I could share his enthusiasm.  Even if I enjoy her cooking, I always eat pretty slow.  It's just a habit of mine, I guess.  I used to be asked if I'm doing okay, by either people in the kitchen as of now, but the asking has died down.  It annoyed the ever-living shit out of me when they would, so I cannot be happier about it stopping.  

Now, I normally get poked fun at for it, which is pretty bothersome, but better than the constant stream of ‘aww what's wrong?’ and ‘are you doing okay?’  I just can't win, either way.  But I'm glad the lesser of the two evils has emerged and taken over.  

Sammy tapped me on the shoulder to pull me out of my thoughts, and then asked with his mouth full, “Can I have your second slice?”  He knows I never eat all of my food, so I just give him what I won't.  He's good at adapting to my habits, and doesn't ever really prod when he can tell I'm dealing with a few issues.  That's what I consider a good brother.  

I moved the excess food to his plate with my fork, the piece he asked for, plus all but one of the sausage links and he exclaimed, “Sweet, thanks dude!”  Luckily he swallowed his food before speaking, because it’s like nails on a chalkboard personally.  It’s so fucking disgusting as well.  One of the habits Sam has that I just can’t stand.  

The other habit is the fact that he’s always fucking high.  And he's been getting high more and more now that Sebastian never seems to come over anymore, despite the fact that they were kind of an item.  I wonder why he stopped, but I digress.  I can tell he had a morning smoke, because his room had a faint, smoky trail wafting from the doorway, and he obviously has the munchies.  He stays high, I stay annoyed, Mom stays silent about it, and…

“Samson, how many fucking times have I told you, don't smoke in my house?”  Kent stays bitchy.  Of course, a perfect way to ruin this nice morning.  Well, my appetite is blasting away, T-Minus two minutes and 47 seconds, give or take.  Sam had made decent progress on his and my food combined, a lot more than I've made on mine.  Looks like that's about to be thrown away.  

Sam made fleeting eye contact with me, the normal pink tint in his eyes still present at this time.  He was either going to argue, storm out of the house, or a combination of both, leaving Kent to bitch for a bit before also leaving.  It's a routine, but luckily I'm out of the house most of the time, out at the saloon, or with Jas and Leo.  I guess I don't have the same privilege today.  

Sammy stood up, pushing the chair in and leaving his food as he went to face Kent once more.  It has happened, it's happening, and it will happen again.  Another cycle.  Another cycle of words passed with a harsh tone as I'm scraping my plate off, turns into arguing that provides background noise while rinsing off my dish, morphing into a screaming match, with the dull thud of a body pushed into the wall that my room shares, that I wait out in said room.  The only time I come out is after I hear the door slam twice, because it means that both of them have left.  Sometimes I've fallen asleep just waiting for them to leave or cool down, the only moments of peace that seem to happen.  When everyone's asleep.  

After waiting for an hour, and drowning out Kent's bitching about how Sam is so ungrateful, and recalling his time as a prisoner of war in the Gotoro prison camps with my music, I heard the second door slam of the day.  Five more minutes ticked by, wasted by staring at a clock, the tunes still blaring.  I tend to waste more time than needed, watching the arrows tick on by.  

After taking off my headphones, I turned the doorknob, the smooth but worn metal feeling nice under my hand.  Now outside of the room, I saw Mom, tear-pricked, tired eyes for once not focused on cleaning something.  She's always cleaning or cooking, I wish Kent would help her more.  Just sitting down on the couch, so I sat down next to her.  Silently, I hugged her, because sometimes you just need a mom hug.  I'm not ashamed of admitting it, I'm kind of a mama's boy.  

“Aw, are you okay sweetheart?  You must be so tired, Gus kept you so late yesterday.”  She returned the hug while asking, because she knows how much it tires everyone in this house.  Sam gets tired of getting yelled at for something that just gets him by, Kent gets tired of the reminders and the stress that comes with it, I'm tired of involuntarily dropping what I'm doing because watching them fight is the worst, and Mom's tired of dealing with them both.  

Once Sam moves out, Kent will find something about me to bitch constantly about, and the loop will continue.  Honestly, once I'm old enough, I'll probably either move to the city or move in with Leo and/or Jas, most likely both.  There's not much left in this town, and it's probably just going to rot.  

But there's a reply to give, the choice of honesty or a lie.  I quietly explained, “It's just so annoying to have this happen every week or so, with you being forced into the mediator spot.  It's unfair.  Why can't they just quit?  Kent needs therapy, and Sam needs to curb the addiction before it starts, and you need a vacation.”  

Mom just sighed and agreed, because really, what else is there to say?  We both know it.  She only got to travel once in her life, and it wasn't very far.  And I didn't mention myself in any of it, because I always just get swept under the rug and ignored.  It doesn't hurt though, I'm used to it.  

“Some things are just…  Difficult.  It's hard to do, dear.”  

And some things are difficult to love, she's married to Kent.  But we won't discuss that, now will we?

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

“You know, it wasn't always like this.”  Mom and I ended up staying on the couch, my head on her shoulder.  Despite both of my parents being tall, Kent especially, I haven't exactly hit that quite yet.  I'm about Shane and Jas’ height, while Leo towers over all of us.  It's frankly terrifying, but I think it's also kinda-

Mom shifted a little, to make us both a bit more comfortable.  Despite it being summer, the air conditioning gave the air a winter-like chill, so we pulled the couch blanket over us.  “We were high school sweethearts, and he was such a gentleman….  I haven't told you how we ended up like this, huh?  Well, I guess we have the time.”  Listening to stories about when Mom and Kent were young is always so interesting, like taking a telescope and bending it through time, warping a perception that can truly never be bent.  

As if she were a librarian, flipping the aged pages of a children's storybook, she wistfully started, “It all started in our middle school history class.  He was the Scouts boy, and proud of it.  Believe it or not, I wasn't always set on the housewife path.  I was known for being a Sailor's daughter, and always had a zeal for the unknown…”

“I was the toughest tomboy in that class.  Constantly outside, helping my brothers with yard work and hefty lifting when your grandpap was away, fighting with the Navy.  You could often find me climbing up in trees, or with mud on my arms in the creek.  I could have easily won in a fight with any of the guys there, even the gym dudebros.  Your dad was the only worthy opponent there.”  

“One day during Winter, during our shared lunch period, he challenged me to an arm wrestle, and I showed him who's boss, right in front of all his friends.  After that, we developed a healthy rivalry, but it didn't last long.  It melded more into a friendship, with the playful competitiveness still lively as ever.”

“And then the next year we had a few more classes together, including gym.  I really got to show off my strength, and I could tell he was impressed.  It was then that he learned your grandpap's profession, and realized why I was so strong.  He wasn't gonna have any of his children be defenseless.  Why do you think I had Abi teach you guys how to use swords, or why I've shown you some self-defense?"

“What I learned that day was your dad's want to be a soldier.  I knew the horrors of it, and tired myself attempting to explain, but he wouldn't budge.  His heart was set on it, as my heart in the future set on him.”

“As the years passed, we grew and changed, and grew attracted to each other.  We were enamored with each other, and we moved way too fast for our age.  This is gonna be a surprise to you, but Sam was almost born out of wedlock.”

That was indeed a surprise to me.  

“Kent signed up to be a soldier, eager to fight in a war we all knew would happen.  I was completely obsessed with him, and we spent our final summer together doing things our parents advised against.  I wanted to be his wife, but we didn't exactly have the dough for it.  I didn't know what type of life I was signing up for as we had fun, though…”  

“We ended up asking my mom for cash and having a courthouse wedding.  I was two months pregnant and we didn't want people getting too suspicious of us.  And so we were Jodi and Kent, the highschool sweethearts.  He signed up to be a soldier, and I chose to be a soldier's widow.” 

“The reason we chose Pelican Town was because nobody knew our story, and no one knew our reason for marriage.  All they knew was that a soldier and his pregnant wife were moving to the valley, for a great price may I add!”  

“When Sam turned about three years old, I took all the money I'd saved through high school, a secret stash, and we traveled for a bit.  It was maybe a month, but we went as far as we could and had fun.  Your father doesn't even know about it, but I have an entire scrapbook of our time out in the world.”  

“And then I got back, back to reality, and life went on.  Your father came and went, we had to have you somehow, and life stayed fairly lonely but the same for me.  I made friends, we got to know people, we built a life, and here we are.  But I created a household, raised a family, and stayed that strong girl that beat his punk-ass in an arm wrestle without breaking a sweat.”  

I laughed at my mom’s little sassy turn at the end of the story, a snap and head movement to accompany her voice.  “Now, back to the real world, I need to go to the store.  Would you like to come along?”    

We both stood up, reluctant to move from the comfort of the couch.  I hate breaking away from moments like that, because I never know when it'll be the last.  I never want to become distant, like Sam, or ungrateful, like Kent.  I swear, they just disregard her as a part of their lives that can be ignored!  

“Of course mom, I got a paycheck just burnin’ a hole in my pocket!”  She laughed as we went for the door, stepping into the hot summer air. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

The short walk to the general store is always a somewhat pleasant one, a nice view and familiar paths sometimes being the only enjoyment I get out of some days.  The cobblestone path of town square makes for a nice, dull clunk under the shoes, which pairs okay with birdsong.

Jas is the one that taught me to appreciate the little things like that, even though I've never been the type to dwell on my surroundings as much as others.  Even just looking up at the clouds with her, she would point out the most interesting shapes, while I would always tell her that I just see clouds.  

At the general store is where a bit of my paycheck goes each week, because where else is there to spend it?  Sure, I save a good chunk of it, 3/4ths of each to be exact, but it's not like there's many places around here for a kid to buy stuff from.  Pierre's shop, the movie theater, and the traveling cart, which Kent absolutely detests me buying from.  Dumbdick can't stop me though.  I don't buy from the saloon simply because I am on the clock when I'm there and usually just take what doesn't get sold.  

Pierre greeted us with a cheery, basic hello, calling Caroline's attention when she heard her best friend's name.  I understand, because I'm the exact same way when I hear that Jas or Leo have come around.  But often, we kept conversations meant for our ears only for the treehouse, or Cindersap Woods.  I guess my mom's never really had to deal with people eavesdropping, with Kent gone and us kids disinterested, to her knowledge at least.  

While I was scanning the isles, looking for my normal purchases, Caroline's voice caught my ear.  “Well, with him storming out of the house constantly…”  Oh, this is BOUND to be good.  Is that nosy?  Yes.  Did Kent's storming out and such cause me to lose my appetite, so I feel like it's fair compensation to gain something back?  Mhm.  

“I just wish they would set aside their issues and talk, like a normal family.  I know it's hard for Kent to…”  As I grabbed a bag of sour slimes for Jas, and tilted my head slightly to hear better, I guess someone wasn't a fan of my eavesdropping.  I felt a gently firm hand on my shoulder, and looked to see the mayor.  What's the hype about him, honestly?  Just some bitch.

“Vincent, I don't think it's very wise to listen to people's private conversations.  It's kind of disrespectful, especially considering your mother is involved.  You should take a page out of Jas’ book and treat your elders correctly, with respect .  It's so surprising that you haven't grown to gain some manners of your own.”  

Okay, wow, go suck the Governor's dick.  I am not in the mood for this Marnie-loving bastard.  “If I took a page out of any of Jas’ books, she'd behead me Lewis.”  He just huffed and walked away, obviously displeased.  Old fuckin’ coot.  

Some mango chews for Leo, that bag of sour slimes for Jas, and a few pre-made smoothies for me, the gang's snack preferences are all here.  I'm glad that the farmer keeps giving my bird-boy mangos from the farm, because he'd probably go batshit without them.  I can't blame him though, mangos are so goddamn good.  

Mom and Caroline's chat fell through, Pierre's wife stocking the shelves again and my mom hunting for groceries.  I grabbed a few more things, paid Pierre for the stuff, and followed my mom around for a solid ten minutes before she did the same as I had.

And then it's the same old routine.  Put away groceries, stash my snacks, turn down my mom's offer of lunch before work, and head out.  

The walk to work, with the cobblestone path and life  and shit around, is sometimes the only enjoyment I get out of a day.  Glad that today wasn't the same. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

It's just another night at work.  Comparatively less busy than yesterday's rain, but still enough to have some patrons.  Just the usual patrons, Shane, Pam, Clint…  The normal handful.  Luckily work isn't stressful, because with what happened this morning, I don't think I could take the busy scene Friday brings to the table.  The money is nice, but days like this are a different type of nice.  A tranquil sort of pleasant.  

As I got Pam and Clint another round, Shane motioned me over to his normal perch.  It's my job, but people often don't call me over.  They just patiently wait for Gus or I to come around.  But of course, I went over to him and asked what he needed.  

“Is everything okay at home?”  

Well that was completely out of left field.

A dim light hung above Shane, causing his bangs to cast a shadow over his face, and leaving the entire picture here a little shady, no pun intended.  His slightly raspy voice made his words sound…. Not like a question, but like a man who knows, and asks only to test something.  Maybe my honesty, my trust, or something else…

Now, I know I have it well.  Maybe not as well as some people, but I have it rather good.  I got a job, Kent doesn't direct his anger - in all different forms - at me too much, Sam and him only have big arguments like that when Sam gets high at home, which is kinda often, and Mom's only in tears because of the stress of it all once a week!  Like I said, a lot better than some people.  

Some people in town know, I'm sure of it.  Caroline, and by proxy Pierre and Abigail probably know a good deal.  As Mom's best friend since her and Kent moved to the town, she's been here for the happy couple, to their deteriorated love-type thing.  And while Mom can keep a secret, her best friend…  Might not know how to keep her mouth shut as well.  

Jas has heard from a first-hand account.  So Shane and Marnie have probably heard a bit, listening in on conversations had in her bedroom.  I can't blame them for being nosy, but I can be heavily annoyed.  She's not leaping at the chance to get some dick, she's a fucking child!  We are kids for fuck's sake!  I get that Shane may not have been as responsible, being a gridball star in his youth, but his goddaughter is so much holier than him.

Linus knows.  His dull stare and gentle questions of if my mom's been well are always all-knowing.  Leo most likely offhandedly mentioned it, As he normally gets side-tracked and also doesn't exactly understand what to keep secret sometimes.  But even if that's not the case, Linus knows.   The universe works in mysterious ways, but he works even more mysteriously.  

Haley and Emily have heard the screaming matches, have seen Kent rifling through my brother's room, hoping to find his stash, and probably saw him leave the house right after Sam did.  So, if they can put two and two together, they know at least a bit.  Plus, they've off-handedly offered their couch for me to crash on when tensions are higher than Sam on a rainy afternoon.  

Speaking of, who else would happen to walk in besides the person who I replaced?  Emily walked in with a high energy greeting to everyone, waving to Clint on her way to us three by the bar.  Her arrival was a good excuse to ignore Shane's question, which I was planning to do anyway.  He doesn't need to pry in my shit, even if he may know some bits and pieces.  

“Hi guys!  How's it been down here?"  Shane, Gus, and I couldn't help but smile a little, as her bright personality always makes the lights shine a little, y'know, brighter.  The saloon owner answered for us all, them two having a small conversation as the older patron looked at me again.  

Shane's intense look was odd, coming from a man that always looks and feels so hollow, as the descriptions of his depression have revealed.  His quiet voice instinctively made me lean in, ears tuned to hear the low question, beckoning my interest away from Emily and Gus’ conversation.  “Have things been happening at home?  I saw Kent pass by earlier, and that really only happens whe-” 

A tap on my shoulder yet again pulled me away from the one-sided conversation, and I am so fucking happy that he won't be answered.  It's just so awkward talking about my family life, especially to people with family struggles of their own that don't need to listen to a kid who has it pretty okay.  

Gus stood behind the bar, Emily perched on a bar stool in front of me, and Shane moved to be next to her, reaching for her hand.  Three adults, all looking at me with expectant eyes.  Emily spoke for the three of them, ever-present smile faded away as she added on, “You know, I see Sam leave the house angrily like every week or so, and I keep hearing screaming from that side of the house…  I speak for all of us, we're more than a bit concerned, Vincent.”    I don't like this, not one bit.  I thought this would save me from a conversation like this.  

“We-heh-hell would you LOOK at the time!  I think, since Gus kept me until two yesterday, I should head out a little earlier than normal.”  Cheap excuses have gotten me so far, it doesn't hurt to try once more.  

Shane's hand clamped down on my shoulder, quite unlike Lewis’ from earlier.  Slightly clammy from holding his drink, and ridiculously strong for a man of his stature and build.  Goddamnit, gridball players.  “Vincent, if… Things are happening, I truly hope you confide in someone.  It's a supportive community, and there's many people willing to help you, Jodi, and Sam out if shit hits the fan.  Or, if it already has.”  

Gus’ normal cheery demeanor became more somber, his unwavering gaze very unsettling as he spoke.  Ugh, I sound like Jas…  “Kid, we're always here if you need someone to talk to.”  

“Thanks for the offer, but I don't really need anyone.  A few arguments here and there doesn't hurt, that's life.”  With that, I moved away from the group, the three pairs of eyes genuinely felt like they were burning holes in my head.  “Goodbye everyone!  Have a lovely night, and be sure to try today's special, some freshly-made, locally-sourced crab cakes!”  

As I slipped out of the door, Emily decided to silently join me.  We live close enough, so I let her accompany me home, while on her very way to her own.  With her hands in her pockets, she apologized by saying, “I'm sorry the others were being a bit intense, but our worry is genuine.”   

I stayed silent for the rest of the walk, just about to pass Emily's house.  She hung in her doorway for just a second, turning and speaking to me as I walked.  “Vincent, if things ever get tough, you can still crash on the couch.  Keep the offer in mind, okay?”

The only response she got was an eyeroll, because it's a senseless offer, really.  I can just put my headphones on, and life is okay.  Empty myself, physically and mentally, and things are fine.  Things are always fine, if you ignore them enough. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

One day, while Jas was working with that magic man, Leo decided that we should hang out.  By showing up at my house, unannounced.  Apparently, Mom or Sam let him in, because while I was sleeping, he decided to just sit on the end of my bed, waiting for me to wake up.  Not really creepy, but a bit unsettling.  

I'm glad that he didn't do it himself, a man needs his sleep!  But waking up to someone just on your bed is fucking terrifying, and Leo seemed to realize that when I almost jumped out of bed.  “Sorry Vince… I didn't wanna wait in the living room.  Y'know why…”   

I indeed do know why.  He sat with his legs crossed as I sat up, eyes immediately closed.  “I'm just shirtless, it's really not that big a deal Leo.”  I got up to get a shirt, thankfully having pants on.  Often more times than not in Summer, I just throw my clothes to the side and sleep in barely anything, if I even make it to my room.  Dresser open, shirt on, bam, we're good to go.  “Okay, I have a shirt on.”  

“I just felt bad looking!  You're paler than a ghost, I might get a headache!”  Wow, ok then, fuck you too buddy.  I sat down next to him, just letting the silence after laughter consume the room, much like how Sam's smoke does with his.  I sleep in jeans most of the time - monstrous, I know, so there's no need to change out of that.  Thankfully, because that would be really awkward.  I'm not really self conscious about people seeing me without a shirt, but without pants?  Whole different story.  And I'm not talking about my dick.  

Slowly, we started moving closer and making idle conversation, over the course of an hour laying down together.  Considering he's comparatively taller, my head rested on his shoulder, the warmth inviting me, daring me even to move in more.  And since I'm still rather tired, just having woken up a while ago, it's nice.  He smelled fresh, like the forest and lake water.  Which I don't exactly hate.  His skin and clothes are surprisingly soft, although his hands are tough and calloused.  I've noticed all of these things before, but every time I'm reminded of them, it's just as nice as finding out for the first time.  Just bro shit, y'know?  I think.  

Leo's arms found their way around me, and I just moved closer to him in response.  We fell silent a bit ago, but it didn't leave an awkward silence.  We often just stop talking, comfortable with the quiet and with each other.  I'm a little clingy and he's severely touch-starved, so we work together, and help.  It's just friends helping friends, nothing more.  And, it's oddly comforting.  When Leo's giving me a hug, I just feel safe.  Like nothing can hurt me, and the screaming can't consume my head, and I feel comfortable enough to do things that I hate doing in front of others.  He just makes me feel great, like a friend should.    

He's like the human radiator to my living air conditioner.  I’m always so fucking cold, so we pair like cold ocean water on a hot summer day.  Ain't that so fitting. considering I'm tangled up with the beach boy?  We had moved to get a little more comfortable, which in turn made us get close.

I'm not complaining, it's nice to be close with your best friends, but I feel so fucking warm.  No clue why, but my face just feels like it's on FIRE.  The only reaction I could have was burying my face in Leo's shoulder instead of just lightly resting, which made my face burn more…  What the hell?  I feel so warm.  Almost sickeningly so…

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

Three violent knocks on my door, making my hair and I both stand.  Leo seemed a lot more calm than me, his look of mild annoyance a world away from the sheer terror I felt and reflected.  It can only be one person.  There's only one person in this house that would slam their fist on my door like that, only one person in the valley that holds that much power over this house, only one person in the world that scares me so much.  Only one, simple, four-letter word.  

Kent .

Chapter Text

Sam's POV

---

Vincent had his friend over today.  I can tell, because Dad's in a mood, Jodi's staying out of his way, and Vincent's being interrogated like he was just caught plotting with the Gotoro Empire's leader.  He had a friend over today, and not Jas.  

If it was Jas, they would have hung out in the living room, and Dad would be happier.  She's a smart girl and often discusses things with him, always interested to learn about the places he's been and experiences he's had.  Considering she lived far away from here before her parents kicked the bucket, she has some stories of her own.  He talks about it in such a different light when it's to people that aren't in the family, but she's different.  She's essentially family to Jodi and I, though she might be just a little more to Vincent.  It's hard to tell with that kid.  And if it were Jas, I would have annoyed the hell out of them, because I am an amazing older brother.  

Being the amazing, caring brother that I am, and the nosy bitch that I also am, of course I was going to listen in on the conversation!  Plus, it's good to know all the shit Dad's saying, in case we argue again, which will happen.  If I'm going down someday, I'm taking him with me.  He may be able to dodge death, but not me, bitch.  

Considering there's a door - albeit a rather thin one - between me and the conversation, I couldn't tell who was where, but the voices were easy to pick out.  Now what they were saying, sometimes I wish I couldn't hear it so clearly.  

“So, you were with that Leon kid again, right?”  

“You know his name, Kent.”  

“How many times do I have to tell you, it’s Dad!  I don't understand why you're so disrespectful, we raised you correctly.  With manners, or have you forgotten those already?”  

“That's rich, considering you're constantly dissing Leo, and screaming at Sam like you don't know how to use your inside voice.”

Good one Vincent!  

“You are so fucking indignant.  You know that this household is the best you'll ever get, right?  There's no way Jas would be caught dead with a hooligan working at the saloon with no life goals.”

“Bold of you to assume I want Jas!  I'm not into her!  I do not want to fuck Jas!  I hope your bloodline fucking dies with me and Sam!”  

“And it probably will knowing how insufferable you two are.”  

Okay, thanks Dad, very cool opinion.  

“You could have just left us.  Been away for so long that it barely made a difference that you ever came back to Mom.  Might as well just not have come back to have me and Sam.”  

“Boy I'm the reason you're here on earth, and I could easily be the reason why you're six feet under it.”  

“Wow, death threats.  Sooooo mature Kent, but I don't wanna go see your friends from the military, so no thanks.”  

Oh, he went there…  Even for me, that's reaching far.  It's almost as if Vincent grabbed Dad's guts and threw them up all over the living room floor.  How ironic, considering...  

“I'm going to work.  Don't come to the saloon if you know what's good for you.”  

I heard the door open and close, trying to process everything that just happened.  Vincent's grown, a bit more in my example than I would have expected.  Can't say I'm upset about it, though.  And Dad can't say the same. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Another fucking day at work.  Most days, I'm good with being here, but today I just wanna sleep and listen to my tunes.  Let that be my eternity.  It wouldn't be a bad way to waste life.  Just sleep, away from Kent and the fighting and the monotony and maybe in the bed of….

I realized the day came and went when checking the clock, its arrows reading at about 11:30 at night.  Everyone had left already, besides one person.  Shane tapped me on the shoulder, which made me almost throw the plate I held.  Just a few of today's leftovers that still look pretty good.  I usually eat here before leaving, if I can stomach it.  I don't like eating in front of others, for some reason, so I eat before leaving.  Sometimes, it's actually the only time in a day.  Kinda funny if you ask me.  

“Vincent?”  I looked at him, waiting for him to continue.  “Are you doing okay man?  Your eyebags have been wicked for a bit.”  Wow, thanks!  Go fuck yourself!  

Though, I know he's genuinely a little worried.  If Emily talked about what she might've heard earlier…  That would not be good!  Not at all.  

“Well…”  Bartenders shouldn't be telling the patrons about issues, it's the other way around.  Gus has told me that I'm gonna hear a lot of people's issues, and he wasn't wrong.  So many times, someone will drunkenly admit some twisted shit, and I just gotta respond with that jolly charm Gus has.  

Shane's look was just…  An odd one.  Fine, I'll spill.  “I just argued with Kent today, it wasn't exactly the best thing that could happen.”  I didn't want to say anything else, just sitting down and slowly munching on the grease-soaked pizza, before he asked another question.  

The older man's eyebrows quirked, going from neutral to interested within a moment's notice.  “What was the argument about, if I may ask?”  Shane, you're so fucking lucky I'm letting you pry in my shit.  There's few with that privilege.  Very few people can.  And one of those people just so happens to be on topic.

“Oh, just my friend Leo, who I may or may not have f…”  ….eelings for?  Fucking hell, I gotta leave, before Shane asks me to elabora-

“You can't just say that and expect me to not ask what you were about to say.  Because if you were gonna say what I think you were, that saves me so much worrying when you and Jas hang out alone.”  

Goddamnit.  Feelings for him?  Where did THAT come from?  My heart or some shit?  Ew .  

Do I really have feelings for Leo?  Do I like him?  And not normal like, like Jas, like like.  I think I might.  I think I might like like my best friend, the coward's way to say they might love someone.  

Well…  That would explain my constant blushing around him, focusing on and admiring the little details about him and kinda wanting to kiss him.  Cuddling with him has always been my happy place, which makes more sense now.  

It would explain every time we've hung out, why I'm just as happy to be alone with him as with the trio.  And every look of his that makes me want to keep staring, because he's just so goddamn handsome, and could totally just pick me up if he wanted.  And everytime he has jokingly picked me up, why I enjoy it so much, and why I constantly want to talk to him, and be around him, and why I want to spend the rest of my life with him and oh Yoba, I am denser than a box of bricks made out of brick.  

“I wasn't exactly thinking about what I was saying, but I guess now that I'm thinking about it, I have feelings for him.  If some people in town knew, I don't even wanna think about what would happen.”  I shrugged, just unsure of what to say.  Luckily, Shane got another topic rolling.  

I could tell he was trying to be quiet, like he wanted to keep his question from literally my boss.  Gus knows like everything, Kent's probably said a thing or two.  Shane set down his sparkling water, the gentle clink soft against the wooden bar.  “How is your relationship with your dad?” 

This topic is no better.  Fuck man.   

“Well, it's complicated.”  

I used to think the world of him.  He was the man saving lives and serving our country, a cool legend.  A myth even.  I remembered him, but barely.  I always thought of him as the bravest, coolest, radest, best man this world has to offer.  He was a shadow in my mind, placed on a pedestal higher than Mount Olympus.  But everything that goes up, must come tumbling down.  

The first thing that broke the vision was the first time he put his hands on Sam.  It was an accident, when he couldn't control himself, I could tell.  But it still put a crack in the porcelain image I had of him, just the very same cracking sound of Sam's jaw.  It's never fully recovered, actually.  He would have been the lead singer for his band as well as the guitarist, but that kinda made things difficult.  

Then he did it to Mom.  He tightly grabbed her wrist over something she did, shoving flashbacks into his head.  Her wrists were bruised for around a week after that, and I think that's when I started hating Kent.  

And then….  I don't want to think about the next person in the list.  

“Vincent?  It's been, like, ten minutes.”  

“Dude, I said it's complicated.”  

I should get out of here.  I should go somewhere else.  Maybe somewhere to process what I realized.  Maybe go tell someone what I kinda just realized.  Maaaaaaaybe go talk to a certain bird-boy.  

With the realization that I like him, fear immediately built up.  What would his reaction be?  He might hate me.  If he doesn't wanna be friends, I don't know what I'll do with myself.  I think I need him, a little more than I'm willing to admit.  And the fears just kept building up, from a simmer to a full-on bubbling boil, until the thought consumed my mind like a beam of steam directly onto the forehead.  Numbing almost.  

“I'm going to… Go for the night.”  I left the pizza to Shane, and left my apron at work.  I wonder if he'll even be awake.  Well, what better way to figure out than head-on?  

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

As I pulled the covers over and shut my eyes, a sharp knock made them open right back up.  Who could it be at this hour?  Is someone just going to ding dong ditch me?  What's happening?  Asking questions is simply something I do a lot.  I'm a curious person!

I gently opened the door, only to be tackled by someone.  Just full on hugged, without hesitation.  “Hey shitface.”  

Vincent's mop of ginger hair looked closer to Jodi's in the moonlight.  Of course I let him stay there for a minute, trying to hug him with the same energy.  Why would I leave someone hanging?

Standing there for a minute made me realize how tired I am.  "Vince, why don't we go to bed?  We can share my bed tonight.  Maybe continue what we started at your house?"

"I'm so sorry my dad was being an asshole and kicked you out and I'm sorry I didn't do anything and I sh-"  He stopped speaking once my hand gently cupped his cheek, tilting his head up so I could see him.  

Yeesh!  Why does he look so soulless and worried?

Maybe it's the job.  The problem is the capitalism.

Always.

I wordlessly led him to bed, essentially picking him up.  He's pretty light and I'm rather strong, so it was easier than counting from one to three.

I know he likes being picked up, but I don't say anything about it.  I like it as well, it's fun to pick him up, because I know it also makes him feel safe.  Safe from everything at home that makes him feel un safe.  

As I set him down, I realized that he didn't really tell me why he's here.  Did he just miss me?  Did something happen at work?  What could be wrong with him?  Well, a lot, but that's neither here nor there.  

We got comfortable, assuming the position from the beginning of the day, but a little closer.  Along with Vincent's arms around me, his legs were around my waist.  He was basically clinging on, as if me leaving would be forever.  "Vince, hun, why'd you come here so late?  Your dad might kic-"

He sounds sad, like me when it would rain on the island for days on end.  "Please call me that again.  Please, just… once more."  Aw, he's just so…

He's cute.  I think I like him.  We've been like this for a while, friends that do things that friends normally don't do.  And I think I know why, but I know Vincent is unpredictable and his dad's kinda mean about Sam liking guys, so I've kept my mouth shut.  

Like how my parents used to, a long, long time ago, like way far back, I murmured, "Honey, it's best if you just relax.  Talk to me, okay?  Is everything alright?"  I only really remember one thing about my mother, and it's that she was a very proper lady.  Well, sometimes kids become the opposite of what they see in their parents, I guess!  

"I just realized something, and knowing me, it's gonna consume my thoughts until I tell you.  I think I realized why we do this so much, or why I'm so warm around you, and why I just….  Leo, have you ever wondered why the town's people shoot the shit about you and Jas when you're so close?"  He shifted a little, feeling his shirt rub against my arm.  

Odd way of explaining things, but yeah.  "Yeah, they think I like her.  What does that have to do with any of this?"  I know, but I want to coax it out of him.  I know being too straightforward might ruin the moment, and I think he needs to say it on his own.  Really let it set in.  I've had years to do it, but I don't know how long he's had.  

And the thing is, I don't like her, and she doesn't like me.  I used to have a small crush on her, but she's just really pretty.  Vincent, though…  I've always seen him in a different light.  When Jas and I get close, we're just simply comfortable existing closely, but it's just different with him.  Because I wanna kiss his stupid face.  

"Well, I think I like you.  I'm tired, and need time to sort out my thoughts, but it's kind of a realization I had at the saloon.  I think this is why I wanna kiss you sometimes, and I wanna be with you all the time, and I never wanna let go.  Just lay in bed with you forever…"  My eyes were closed, so I wasn't paying attention to what he was doing, just what I felt.  And what did I feel?  Immediate relief.  

So…  This is interesting, but helps a lot.  Jas and I have talked about it, and it may just be the fact that we're the only two our age in the valley, but I've known how I've felt since I was 14.  I don't like Jas, although everyone thinks that.  I'm used to repeating that fact to the townsfolk over and over again, which gets tiresome and annoying.  Why can't people just lay off us?  We'll do each other's hair and such every so often, but it's never been actual romantic feelings.  

“.. I really hope you don't hate me and we can stay friends, but I needed to get that off my chest and at least tell you.  I know it's late and I'm not thinking straight but how can I when you're around?  Leo, I think I like like you.  I'm sorry if this ruins our friendship…”

“Why would it ruin it when I feel the same way?”  

“... What?”  

What was so hard to understand about that?  I mean, I don't like making the comparison, but it's not like Jas and I.  We're close, but not in that way.  Like yeah, I get being suspicious, but I just hold her hand sometimes.  It’s not that difficult!

“Vince…  We can talk more about it in the morning.  You might not be gay, just tired.”  

He shifted around a little, a yawn confirming what I asked of him.  “Fine, fine, good night Leo.”  Finally, I can do what I planned before the unexpected visit!  I enjoy Vincent, but I enjoy sleeping just a little more.  It’s an escape from the world, a way to live without having to feel the pain of life.  I didn’t even get to say good night, immediately succumbing to sleep once my eyes shut.  Good night, Vincent. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

“So, I kinda got pissed off at Shane and threw everything he's been trying to fix in his face, and now I physically can't talk to him.  I thought of trying and proceeded to lock myself in my room all day.  I didn't even help feed the chickens.”  That's a new low for Jas.  Feeding the chickens is the one thing that she won’t give for anything else.  

We gathered at our normal hangout spot, my treehouse, upstairs so people have a less chance of barging in and hearing our serious conversations.  Why are people so carefree when it comes to others’ privacy in this town?  It always baffled me a little, and still kinda does.  Even I’m guilty of it sometimes, considering I’ve lived here for quite a while now.    At least Vincent knocked last night.  

Jas got done with explaining how she yelled at Shane, maybe about a week ago, and still hasn't talked to him.  She's not exactly a non-confrontational person, so it's obvious that this means more than she'll let on.  Picking up on my friends’ little habits has always been a bit of a talent, I'm able to do it with ease.  

“Vincent, you also had an argument to talk about?”  Jas was almost eager to hear it, which isn't odd for her.  Her thirst for knowledge also happens to include what happens around town, interpersonal relationships shifting and such.  Otherwise known as gossip.  

This was all new information to me, and I'm the reason they're talking about it.  Each of them had an argument with an adult in their life, and they want me to avoid having one.  I don't plan to though.  Why do they expect me to have one with someone?  I'm not a fan of arguments.  

While Jas’ story was simple, Vincent's had a bit of rewinding before the argument.  And it started with me hanging out.  Then he talked about when I was told to leave, and…  Wait, was I the reason they argued?  It is kinda my fault, I hung out and his dad didn't like it.  As he explained more and more, I felt a little more guilty, every single word balling up into a pit in my stomach.  I guess it would be better for his family if I was gone, huh?  

After he finished explaining, I apologized by saying, “Sorry for causing that argument, Vince.  Maybe we should keep hangouts here, if your dad's gonna act that strongly.  It's only a matter of time until he gets mad enough to…”

Vincent let a low hum out, clearly not happy that I apologized, though I'm not sure why.  That argument really seems like my fault!  His hand tensed while still clutching mine, something that usually is reassuring.  But the growing pit in my stomach wasn't soothed by it.  

Jas noticed the hand, and quietly exclaimed, “Oooooooh, holding hands?  Did something happen that I'm unaware of!?”  She tends to be a little more interested in us two than need be.  Despite us two acting a little closer than most friends, whenever Vincent and I do anything remotely like a couple, she's quick to point it out.  

Vincent just gave me a glance.  I'm not sure what to say.  So we just stayed like that for a second, unsure of what to say, or how to explain, before both of us simply looked away.  What is there to explain?  Well, a lot, actually.  After we woke up, we had a looooong discussion over breakfast.  

Left in silence, with an expectant gaze flicking from one of us to the other...  Well, she is our closest friend, and will figure it out either way.  Jas is exceptionally good at finding out stuff that's not exactly her business.  

“Well, Blue Jazz…  Vince came over last night, and said some stuff…  Then we talked this morning.  Apparently, he has feelings for me, and I like him, so we agreed on a few things.  We're not really dating, we're taking things really slow, and we're not exactly gonna be public.  You pointed it out before, this town may be accepting for the most part, but some people are not it.  We're just…  Why do you want to know?”  

Jas just smiled and laughed a little, which is both horribly ominous and terribly unsettling.  She might not realize, but she's just….  A bit scary.  Smart people terrify me.  

Vincent abruptly asked, “Leo, don't you have work today?  It's 1:20, you should probably head out that way.”  Oh shit, I do have work!  I stood up, my two friends right in tow as our footsteps gave the mountains a bit more life. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Light conversation about nothing important surrounded us three, which I never understood.  Why talk when there's nothing to talk about?  Though Jas found a topic, hounding Vincent and I for any bits of information that we're “withholding” from her, and believe me, it's a lot.  What happens in the treehouse, stays in the treehouse.  Especially if a homie that might end up being your “boyfriend” someday cries once or twice.  Or if you end up kissing your homie a few times.  

The walk didn't take very long, but Vincent likes seeing the swords that Marlon keeps in stock, and Jas loves hearing stories about the mines, and the perils that some people go through.  I've heard quite a few stories, but they never fail to bore us two.  

Marlon isn't the biggest fan of my friends following me into the store.  He considers Vincent to be noisy and annoying, while Jas asks too many questions and is “too curious for her own good.”  Especially since there was a gap between Gil's death and me working there, he is maybe too used to the quiet.  And I don't exactly talk much to him, unless he asks questions about the Island, and more likely the volcano back home.  The quiet gives him time to mourn who I've replaced, even if it’s been a while.  

So, once I got to work, I said my goodbyes and took my seat, before Marlon spoke.  It actually kinda scared me, because like I said before, a rare occurrence.  What did he want this time?

“Hey, kid.  I have a special task for you today, if you're up for the challenge.”  Oh?  A challenge?  He never gives me tasks, other than giving the prizes to people for the Adventurer's Guild - Abigail and the farmer, namely.  “I want you to take this master slingshot, and fire at quarry rocks with different ammos.  Just take the baskets of ammo, and clear that old quarry out, you can keep anything that drops.  Watch out for trees, though, the farmer hasn’t done it in a long time.”  

I got up, taking a few of the weapons he offered and leaving the shop.  I rarely come by the quarry, so it’s an unfamiliar sight to me, and a rather weird place.  You’re telling me rocks just show up here?  Wack.  

I spent my day just shooting rocks, after chopping a few trees down.  Iridium seems to work best, but I like explosive ammo, personally.  As I kept shooting rocks and nodes, I thought of how people were shooting the breeze back at Jas’ birthday party.  About us.  

Why are people so insane over literally just physical contact?  All we did was hug.  But people like Robin and Marnie tend to blow it out of proportion, and spread some insane rumors.  Me and Jas kind of…  Already know what our exact feelings about each other are.  That's where all the rumors started, back at Marnie's ranch, with that very woman.  

And thinking of her made me think of our little trio.  While Abigail, Sam, and Sebastian may be the iconic A.S.S. trio, we're more like the three musketeers.  What's gonna happen to us as we grow and go our separate ways?  There's no way Jas will stay in the valley.  She's got better things to do, bigger sights set, and brighter sights on the horizon.  Well, unless she takes after the magic man.  And as for Vincent, there's no telling what he'll do.  Despite me being the insane little man of the group, he's the true wild card.  He might stay and run the saloon, or set out to do something else.  

Of course, my mind wandered to Vincent.  How could it not?  Spending last night and this morning with him quite literally changed my life, as it is right now.  And I'm sure it'll change more and more later, but for right now….  That boy's got me all twisted up.  And apparently doing stuff without thinking.  

I hadn't noticed anything bad until I looked at my leg, suddenly feeling the searing of an injury, the blood's red trail trickling down and down the newfound hole in my pants, and there's a nugget of gold lodged in my leg.  Well, I'm due for a check-up anyway, I guess.  Time to head back!  

My leg dragged when I made my way back to the Guild, suddenly aware of how much pressure makes my leg helplessly fold.   “Hey Marlon…  I.  Think I should go to the hospital.”  Short and sweet, just like the time it took me to hit the floor.  And the darkness hit, like my face on the floor. 

Ouch.  

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Blinding lights.  It felt like when I stared at the Summer Sun for ten minutes as a kid, just so bright.  The next thing I saw, a dark silhouette in the shape of Dr. Harvey, looming dangerously close, almost as if he was right over me.  And well, he was.  AAH!  

“Oh, sorry kiddo!  Didn't mean to frighten you, just needed to check if anything happened to a body part other than your leg.  The face was the last thing I was checking.”  Dr. Harvey always has a kind way of just…. Being!  He's a sweet man, and never would hurt a fly.  I have quite literally seen him do the cup trick with the paper more times than I can count on my fingers.  He’s one of the few adults that wasn't mean to me or shunned me in the beginning of my time here in Pelican Town.  

I couldn't find it in me to speak.  I was tired.  Who knew blood loss makes you tired?  I didn't, that's for sure.  The hospital bed wasn't comfortable, but I'm not un comfortable.  I just…  It's a weird feeling of numbness.  Did he put me under some sort of numbing stuff?  Medicine is something I rarely take, so who knows how my body would react to it.  

I SURE DON'T!  

The lights were still way too bright, so I simply closed my eyes, and let the blanket sift out the remaining light from my eyelids.  Bye world!  I’m going sleepy night night.  

Or, at least, I tried to.  But within a split second of that blanket going over my head, the pain came back more fierce than a hoard of magma sparkers.  It genuinely felt like it, a burning pain in my leg.  And when I tried to sit up, the pain seemingly traveled from my leg to my forehead, I CAN'T WIN UGH.  This sucks actually.  

Harvey must have heard my little struggle, because his light footsteps made their way to the room, each step in line with my head throbbing.  Hhhhhhhhngnngnnnnnnnnnng…

“Is everything okay Leo?”  

I must be loopy or something, because I really responded with, “Mentally or like physical-ly?”

Harvey stopped moving for a second, my words most likely hitting him like a warm bag of void mayonnaise.  Highly confusing but just a minor inconvenience.  He started moving again while replying, “Well, I'm mostly focused on your physical health, considering you shot yourself with a gold nugget, but your mental health is also important.”  

“Well, because.  I am in pain a lot of the time both ways, but I cannot think right now so mainly physically right now.”  He silently gave me a cup of water and a few pills, which I gladly drank down.  If it's gonna help right now, it's gonna help.  And I am not a coward that shys away from getting help!  But I am stupid, so it cancels out.  I'll admit that.  

Harvey just stared at me.  I don't know if he's realized by now, but being unsupervised for most of my childhood and being raised by literal parrots does something to people's mental health.  Also being halfway shunned from society once I FINALLY get back into it is a little hurtful, not gonna lie.  

He didn't know what to say, simply pulling a stool over and sitting down next to my hospital bed.  “That's not good, and you can always come and talk to me if you need to.  But right now, I want to focus on physically, what happened and such.”  

Harvey didn't really have a way to bill me, so I felt like I cheated him out of time and supplies and such.  I really am a freeloader waste of space, huh?  Well, can't really do much about that, unless I run away to the island again or die or something.  

We went over what happened, I had to explain that I was thinking about something and kinda shot myself without realizing.  He told me about the surgery procedure, how long I'll need to rest, and other useful information.  I really don't know how I'll rest for a few weeks, because Dr. Harvey sir, we live where everything is walking distance.  The first time I saw a car was less than five years ago.  

“I’d suggest having someone bring you food and such from the stores, and staying home for these few weeks.  It would simply be the best idea, because walking on that injured leg will make the healing process slower.  And I know that there's no avoiding walking so I say a few weeks, to account for lost time.”  Well, he is the doctor for a reason, he's a smart man.  

The throbbing in my head died down a little, and my leg went numb, which I am so glad for.  But I'll be even happier once I get to leave.  “When do I get to leave?”  I hadn't asked and he hadn't said, so that was something we needed to establish quickly.  

“Well…  Kiddo, do you know how long a normal shot wound primarily takes to heal?”  Not exactly, because I have literally never seen a gun before.  “About 5 days.  But considering this isn't a normal gunshot wound, I would like to keep you here for three days.”  

And for three days, I laid and sat there, wasting space and attention.  Yippie-kay-yay. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

After those three days, I was allowed to go home.  Finally!  Why was I kept for that long?  Well, he told me, but still.  The first breath of fresh air made my lungs jump for joy, although that feeling may just be nausea.  I'm incredibly happy to feel something under my foot, although the painkillers I'm on make my leg and head numb still.  If I was allowed, I would SO go swimming in the lake, but I'm not allowed to get the stitches wet.  

My leg slightly dragged behind me during the walk up to the mountains I call home, probably because I'm, “not supposed to put much pressure on my leg,” whatever that means.  A walk like this sapped my energy, just like eating sap.  Slowly, but surely enough.  As the Community Center faded behind me and the mountains came into view, a familiar face stood out by the trees.  

“Leo!  Where have you been?!  We haven't seen you for days!”  Robin's voice and footsteps caused me to stop in my tracks, not expecting for someone to talk with me so soon.  Her face full of worry, she stopped in front of me and it doesn't exactly seem like she'll leave me alone until she gets an answer.  Which I don't mind, because she's nice to be around, if you stay on her good side.  

I pointed at my leg, still wearing the same pair of pants from days ago.  “Well…  I shot myself by accident while working.”  Robin's no stranger to accidents during work, an occasional dropped saw and rusty nail does a number to someone, but she doesn't shy away from showing scars like Jas does.  They add a few interesting touches, I think, especially as someone who has many from stupid things, like climbing trees.  

The spirit of a gasp left her, it probably looks bad.  I still refuse to see the wound, not wanting to associate thinking of Vincent with seeing that.   He's better than that.  He deserves more than that.  Deserves more than a dumbass that shot himself in the leg because he was distracted, but anyways…  

Robin's expression turned thoughtful, and as if the gears in her head spun by seeing my injury.  “Why don't you come have lunch with me and the kids?  I'm sure it'll be easier to just have lunch instead of catching it or foraging it with your bum leg.”  That's… Actually not a bad idea!  My way of life isn't exactly the easiest while injured, though I at least know my body's limits because of it.  

I smiled while answering, “Sure!  Your cooking is pretty nice.”  Robin has always been kind to me, although it took her a bit to get used to another “wild man” in the mountains.  She's realized how hurtful her words have been in the past, though, and she's fixed her way of thinking.  We all can work on ourselves to be more considerate of others, but some people aren't even considerate enough to do that.  

Robin told me to go to the kitchen as she rounded up her kids, Maru and Sebastian.  I don't have a gripe with either, they're pretty cool people, despite having some tension around them.  The tension has calmed down from what I've heard, but it's still there.  At least it isn't thick enough to shoot with a nugget of gold.  

As the two followed Robin, Maru flashed me a smile and sat down at the table by me.  Conversations with her always prove to be interesting, to say the least.  She's super smart, and is fun company.  She's so cool, and I wish I could be her friend, honestly.  Even though my friends are cool and the best I could hope for, it's not exactly a bad thing to wish for stuff, right? 

Chapter Text

Maru's POV

---

I didn't know we had a visitor!  It's my boy Leo, the cool tree guy!  That may sound ridiculous, but it's true.  His way of life has always intrigued me, considering it's an odd mish-mash of Linus and his old island life, and the lives we all lead in this valley.  He wears the type of clothes we do, but will squawk on occasion and talks to parrots, will prepare food the exact same way, but also pairs some foods with a side of golden walnuts harvested from Ginger Island.  He can also crack a coconut open with his head!  He's interesting, someone who I can learn from, but also teach a thing or two, almost like a trade-off.  

Leo and I started talking about an actual topic immediately, both of us not wasting any time catching up and useless chit-chat about the weather or how we're doing.  We both like getting down to it, which is a super change of pace from most people in the valley.  “If you don’t have anything worthwhile to say, just don't talk,” is what I always say.  He talked about what he did at work, which reminds me of a science experiment!  While Sebastian helped Mom make the wraps, I explained how to apply the scientific method to what he was testing, and asked him about his results.  While I know he's a bit too clumsy to help in the lab, he'd be pretty cool as someone to help with tests.  

Once Sebastian joined us, he pointed out the blood stains on Leo's jeans and deemed them cool, he pulled up his pant leg to show us the wound.  A bit of grape juice landed on my hand, the wound catching my brother by surprise and causing him to spit it out.  Luckily he caught most of the mess with his hand, or that would have truly been a sticky situation.  I know the two of them know each other pretty well, especially since Sam's brother and Leo are kind of a thing, but I'm pretty sure Leo and I are closer at this point. 

The three of us sat in the kitchen as we ate buffalo chicken wraps, made with leftovers.  I honestly don't believe that it's leftovers from a few nights ago, despite having been there, because the veggies make it taste really fresh.  As we enjoyed lunch, light chatter still filling the room, I could imagine a slight bit of surprise from anyone walking in.  When you put an emo, a tree-dweller, and someone who has their life together all in the same room, it doesn't look right.  

That “anyone” happened to be Dad.  I knew Leo's never a big fan of him, though I'm not sure why.  He's never explained it to me, but I do know it may partly be because of how judgmental my dad can be.  He also thinks it's detrimental to the environment that Leo's living in a tree.  Dad would probably try to study him if he could.  But that only adds to his distrust of Demetrius.  

We've been to Ginger Island, and Demetrius really doesn't know how to separate his work and home life.  And that's the small-town struggle.  But I remember once, when Leo was standing by a parrot perch, Dad said, “Can you believe this place? It's teeming with exotic life!”  

If I were him, I would have definitely thought the comment was directed at me.  It makes sense, he WAS part of the life there!  And worst of all is, Dad doesn't remember.  The axe forgets, the tree remembers.  And following the analogy, I felt like an oak, rooted in place awkwardly when I watched it happen.  

He stole a plate and a kiss from Mom, and was quick to leave, always seemingly staying away from Sebastian on purpose.  But he didn't leave without one little comment, as he always does.  It irks me a little that he always has to say something, this time being, “I guess the great wilderness can't even resist Robin's cooking!”  

I could tell he meant it light-heartedly, but Leo just looked uncomfortable.  As the footsteps faded, I apologized for Demetrius.

Well, I would have, if Sebastian hadn't beat me to it.  “Sorry, he's not exactly great with socialization skills.”  Mom said his name in the one tone, you know the tone, and Leo halfheartedly laughed a little.  

“Thank you for lunch Robin, it was great, but I think…  I'll be leaving right about now.”  He rinsed his plate off in the sink, a habit he most likely learned from us, and proceeded on his way.  Sebastian and I shouted goodbyes his way, as mom did too.  

“I hope he's okay, with his leg and what Demetrius said.  The poor boy takes things a little closer to heart than most do.”  Mom mused aloud the thoughts we were all having.  Though he's a strong boy, I'm sure he'll be okay. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Three days or so later, and I haven't left my treehouse.  Has it been four?  I'm not exactly keeping track.  Not since I had lunch with the carpenter's family.  I haven't had lunch since then, or eaten much for that matter.  What have I been doing all this time?  Sleeping when I'm not awake, and questioning my existence when I'm not asleep.  A cycle of sleep and think and sleep and think.  What have I been thinking about?  

Am I simply just wild to others, as Demetrius said?  Another animal in the great outdoors?  A creature ?  Am I even HUMAN to them?  Or am I simply a parasite, leeching off of this kinda successful town?  Am I a nuisance?  Am I wasting space and resources, like the food Robin gave me?  When am I NOT doing that?!  Am I just a parasite?  Am I…

AM I HUMAN?  Physically, yes.  Mentally?  I think so!  I've always known I'm not a parrot, even if that was a method of deflecting the truth and sorrow of my parents dying and washing up on an island.  But I'm losing it.  Losing my grip, more than I have before.  Gotta ground myself.  I can feel my hands, fingers wriggling and gripping, pulling, tearing at my hair when I'm forced to sit through these thoughts.  It's nothing like when I was alone, laying in that stagnant hospital bed, or with visitors, sitting up and attempting to speak.  I can barely talk now, just a spare squawk here and there, really all I can manage.  Not even words at this point.  What is a word?  Just a weird sound, made up of weird sounds.  

Why am I like this?

The wooden floor of my treehouse underneath my feet, though not on my legs, is smooth and cool.  I haven’t worn the clothes I want to since I got home.  Just comfortable pants, jeans specifically, because Dr. Harvey said shorts aren't a good idea.  I need to keep my leg protected, I guess.

The stitches itch.  They itch and scratch and bite into my skin, digging in every second, making it feel like a bigger wound than what I had.  

These thoughts.  The thoughts make me tired.  The thoughts make me sick.   They make me wanna not eat.  They tell me to not eat.  Why waste food, oxygen, water, space?  Why waste it when someone more deserving could be taking it?  A squirrel could have lived in this tree.  But no, it’s just me.  

I am straight-up not having a good time.  

It’s been a loop for days and days on end.  I think, so I sleep, and I wake up, so I think.  I hate it.  I hate it all.  I hate living.  I just wanna go back to Ginger Island with my family and relax.  Float on the water.  Sink into the water and go be with my real family and never rise again.  

I can't do this.  I need to leave, need to get out and see the sun and feel the sun and-

Knock…

            Knock…

                        Knock…

Oh great, someone else.  

I went to the door, not caring that I'm not wearing a shirt.  It doesn't look bad, I just think it's weird.  And the person who's exposed to the horror is…

“Vincent!!”

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Immediately, the thin arms of Vincent surrounded me, doing his best to engulf me in a hug.  Maybe…  I need this.  Someone's touch, this specific person, it's comforting.  Grounding even.  

“Leo!  I haven't seen you for a whole week!  Last I heard, you were in the hospital, but when I went you had been discharged, and when I came here you weren't there, then- I even went searching on Ginger Island!  You had me all twisted up!  Asshole!”  

Vincent started talking, and talking, and recapped his entire week as we fell into our normal habits, and started chilling on the bed.  

I brought my leg up, resting it out instead of bent.  Dr. Harvey advised that I avoid keeping my leg bent.  “Well, you had me so twisted that I shot myself in the leg.”  His bony fingers gently came up, making me all-the-more aware of how the stitches felt.  

His look melded soft horror with intense worry, making me feel bad for what I did.  For not seeing him.  For keeping myself in here.  “Oh fuck...  Leo, you need to pay more attention to what you're doing…  Are you…  Okay?”  

Nope!  But I wasn't going to outright say what I've been feeling.  I tried to gently bend the truth, explaining, “I've just been getting in my own head.  I'll be alright.”  I hope so.  Do I even want to think about it, knowing what my brain's been doing?  Maybe I don't need to think, because someone's here with me.  

"Motherfucker, that's a leg?? Well, I'm glad that you'll be alright,” Vincent said with a goofy grin.  He’s just so pretty!  I wanna kiss him and hold him close and let my brain melt away in his arms.  “You know, Kent can't bother us out here.  We can finally…”  Some of the hair that covered my face was moved, with caution, and he moved closer.  Ugh, this is some cheesy romance stuff…  I like it.  

It started like we normally do.  Just cuddling.  We're simple creatures of habit!  And we stayed like that for a while.  Then he moved to be face-level with me, and faces collided.  He gets a few kisses!  I allow it.  Just soft and gentle, a welcome difference from life that we both need.  

We talked for a bit, before Vincent came to the conclusion of, “Leo, my man, you…  Sounds like you need to eat.  You're hungry, which makes you loopy.  Let's go make some food!”  I mainly eat cold food, unless I make a fire outside.  Don't feel up to it right now.  We got up, although I'm always reluctant to leave the warmth, and made our way to the kitchen.  Because I had some raw, cut fish stored with some other things, we sloppily rolled up some sushi.  I freaking love making it myself, although pressing seaweed into the same thinness as most store-bought nori is kind of difficult.  

We're still just homies that happen to kiss, so obviously, we were just fooling around like normal.  See, I don't think this should change how we act towards each other or anything.  We're just friends, but there's three letters before it, y'know?  

He spent hours in the treehouse with me, seemingly just being here is enough to calm my overactive mind down.  But, as what happened at work, I fear it calms me down too much.  

Although Vincent is way shorter than me, he tried to talk while hugging me from behind.  The muffled sound made me feel kinda weird as he spoke.  Considering it was right into my shoulder.  "It's getting dark, Kent wants me back home.  Sorry, but I gotta go.  Bye!"  

He left me alone, but my mind didn't start to freak out as it did when I got home last time.  I simply just laid in bed, thinking of Vincent and of my appointment tomorrow.  Good night, world.  Until we meet again. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

"So, kiddo, how's your leg holding up?"  The seat was cold under my legs, still being forced to wear these stupid pants until these stupid stitches come out.  I just shrugged, the small weight of my clothes being odd after not wearing a shirt for a bit.  

The wound looks okay, so he went ahead with the removal, which went smoothly.  As all of this went on, all I could think of was what happened after lunch at Robin's.  How the thoughts consumed my mind, making me take less care of myself than when I lived on Ginger Island.  And word of advice, don't leave a six year old in charge of himself.  Even if Birdie never really left her hut, I am extremely thankful for her presence on the island.  

It's not exactly about how my leg is "holding up," it's about how I'M holding up.  I'm not sure that I am, frankly.  I might be going a little insane.  Just a bit though!  Harvey did say that I can talk to him if need be, but it's always a little intimidating talking to someone.  Anyone , really.  

"Sorry for wasting stitches, Dr. Harvey."  His gaze held utter confusion, perhaps not understanding what I said.  What is there to explain?  To need clarification on?  Harvey's a smart man, he knows what I'm talking about.  Or at least what I mean.  

He gently set down his clipboard, looking me over for a few seconds.  "Leo, do you perhaps struggle with feelings of lessened self-worth?"  Harvey's voice, caring and inviting, almost forced a head nod out of me.  Well, here comes the onslaught of questions…   

"Have you been eating regularly?" "Have you noticed any mood swings or irregular behaviors?"  The list went on and on, Harvey asking and the answer coming from a nod, shake, or squawk.  It slips, but he doesn't react any time it happens.  Then, he asked one, final question.  One question to end all questions.  His voice got real hushed as he leaned in ever-so-slightly and asked, "Have you had any sort of… Suicidal thoughts?"  

Well, it's complicated.  I could just say yes, because I have taken moments while sitting up on the top of the volcano and just thought of plummeting to the ground.  Swimming with the fishes in the ocean, pushing up daisies in the fields of flowers and bees that the farmer magically grows.  

I could say no.  The world is a beautiful place, and I'm glad I'm a part of it.  The moon looks so beautiful as stars scatter the night sky, parrots hold so many bright colors that make flying flocks a mesmerizing sight, the feeling of sand and dirt under bare feet is something worth staying on this earth for.  

But, there's always the days that I want to sleep, sleep, sleep life away.  Vincent curled up beside me, just sleeping.  Not living, not dead.  So, that's kinda my answer.  

And I told him my answer, the first question that got words as an answer.  "Well funny story!  It's not like I wanna die, but I'd much rather sleep than be awake and living, y'know?"  Harvey looked as if he did not know.  A deep concern from the bottom of his heart seemed to surface on his face, which did NOT make me feel good looking at.  

"That's not funny or a story, kiddo.  Please talk to someone if you're feeling that way in the future."  

Maybe.  We'll see where the future takes us.  And if it's to the grave, so be it. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

There's three things you should never trust Jas with: the ability to read sheet music, someone that'll humor her thoughts, and a piano. Because she knows how to accidentally grind gears.  

Autumn settled on our small world, and by proxy Zuzu City. The leaves had turned Jas' favorite shades, all sorts of reds, oranges, and yellows, sprinkled all about the tall tree tops.  

But that shit bores me. I'm more interested in the unfamiliar hustle and bustle of the busy town, scoping out the interesting looking stores that our little group might like. Well, Jas, actually. It's her birthday, her shopping trip, and Leo and I are just along for the ride.  

Driving with Shane is an experience I'm willing to ignore, instead letting the landscape on the other side of the car distract me from the disaster allowed behind the wheel. Glad I didn't eat before the trip like Mom said I should, for more reasons than one.    

We didn't exactly have a set plan, but Jas knew there were three places she needed to go if she wanted to use her gifts. The first one - I pointed it out - was the record shop. Well, a music shop technically, but that's the main reason I've been there.  

Of course, since we saw it, it's time to stop in! And when you put Jas with music, you get either a sweet tune or a melody to end your ear drums. Although she could say the same for me.  

Me and Jas both have interests in music, but… rather different tastes. Considering I play mine off of a cracked-ass phone, and she normally uses her record player, it's… Quite different.  

While Leo followed Jas, I wandered away from the two, looking for the old school rap and hip-hop section with Shane, the odd man with good music taste. I just like to see the art for the stuff, it's not like I collect records, unlike Jas. She refuses to use her phone for music, normally saying that it "ruins the true experience", or whatever bullshit excuse she has.    

I stayed in the section, which bordered the instrument area. The little, familiar plink of piano keys, almost fucking drilled into my skull the moment I heard it. No clue why, but every single note felt like another nail hammered into the back of my head. I fucking hate pianos.  

Jas somehow learned piano at one point. It might have been from Elliott, maybe many online guides to the keys and reading sheet music, maybe even Sebastian showing her the synthesizer and her going from there. But it drives me mad to no end, and I literally cannot understand why. I don't even have a logical reason to hate them!  

I moved closer, just to see who was with her. Leo, leaning on the piano, humming a gentle tune. I know what it looks like when he does it, lips slightly drawn in and closed eyes. I love when he hums, although he refuses to sing… I'm not sure why, but it's not the point.  

When I saw Jas taking his melody and singing the song, I felt a little burning pit in my stomach, which is why I walked over and hugged Leo as tight as possible. Just because he can do something doesn't mean he should do it with people that aren't me.  

"Vincent, are you… okay?" Leo's question held confusion as Jas snickered at my actions. He genuinely had no clue why I suddenly showed up, or why I'm doing any of this, though she knows. Jas fucking knows everything.

"He's jealous, awww," she playfully sneered. And while I know she's teasing, fuck off. "Okay, I think I have what I'm buying, so let's check out and blow this joint." Her tone sounded a lot more humorous at that point, taking a phrase that I normally use.  

We did just that, and after Shane tripped in the parking lot, we were onto our next stop - whatever the hell that may be. I don't know, I zoned out when people were giving her gifts. The entire way there, I got teased for my little bit of jealousy, by BOTH of the bitches in the car. Even Shane laughed at the arm I put around Leo, which was just like kicking a poor man when he's down. But oh well, Shane's driving distracted me from that. Sweet Yoba, this man needs to go back to driving school…

Chapter Text

There's three things you should never trust Jas with: the ability to ruin someone's life, "free" samples, and an insane amount of clothing.  Why do I say that?  Because Jas is so close to ruining my life at the moment.  If Vincent sees me…

"Leo, the hell is that on your face?"   

"Well…."

Okay, rewind to about an hour and fifteen minutes ago.  We saw the boutique Haley and Alex gave gift cards for and pulled in, almost hitting the curb on our way.  Shane's driving is almost as turbulent as the sea on an angry day.  

Honestly, I would never see Jas shopping here, but here we are.  

Us three went in, Shane opting to stay in the car.  Probably for the better, considering he looks like he grabbed a handful of random clothes and called it a year.  

First, Jas ran into a section that I didn't feel comfortable going into, so I just hung out until she put a box in my hands.  "You may not be my manthing, but you can carry my stuff for me, right?"  Upgraded from best friend to temporary manthing, woooo!  Now don't let Vincent hear that, it wouldn't end well according to what happened in the last store.    

Next, the clothing section.  My main job was to follow her around, and I had no freaking clue where Vincent went.  We didn't spend too much time here, just picking up one or two items.  I saw a flash of pink, and a carefully-folded blue something, some smooth satin and mesh.  No idea what it could be, though.  Knowing her, a dress, or jumpsuit, or button-up shirt.  

Then, the accessories.  Hats, sunglasses, jewelry, and whatever else galore.  This is where Jas started to comb through things a little more carefully, looking over the jewelry with more of a hawk's eye than in the previous section.  Carefully, another few boxes, albeit very small, were put on the stack of stuff already in my arms.  How much gold did this girl get?!

After that, we got to a hair section.  She picked out just a few things, and a pack of scrunchies for me.  We style each other's hair sometimes, and I will never forgive her for the time she put butterfly hair clips in my hair.  That was embarrassing.  

We breezed past the area, just a short and simple thing.  Unlike the next one…  The makeup section.  Before we fully got into it, Jas stopped and looked at me, starting with, "Leo, I'm giving you a special job.  All you have to do is b-"   

"Last time someone gave me a special job, I shot myself in the leg."  

".... Right.  Well, this time, all you'll have to do is stand and look pretty.  Quite literally, be pretty."  Please don't tell me she's gonna put makeup on me…  "You're gonna be my test model for the samples."  

Looking around, I didn't see anything that indicated free samples, and I said as much.  Jas just smiled and said, "Anything's a free sample if you don't get caught!"  I don't see any cameras, so I just shrugged.  Well, as best as I could with the stuff in my arms.  Can't believe she's gonna put makeup on me, but I'm not even attempting to stop her.  That would result in probably being fired from my status as temporary manthing, and I don't want that!

We made our way through small sections, slowly going from one thing to the next, Jas meticulously trying to match shades and compare our skin tones to see what one she would need.  I have no clue how I look right now.  Though I know there's stuff on my lips, on my eyelids and the areas around, and all over my face.  

Then, Vincent walked over, and asked, "Leo, what is that on your face?"  He snuck up behind me, so I squawked and almost dropped Jas' stuff that she wants me to carry.  I'm not easy to startle, it was just surprising!  And well…  Makeup?  I had to really pay attention as he mumbled, "Because it looks really nice on you."  

And then Jas went to town with a few different makeup wipes.  Damn.  So after maybe ten more minutes of contemplating and a bit of noticing that I was breaking into hives, she picked out quite a few bottles and tubes and other things that I am clueless about, then we checked out.  She was right on the nose with the cost, which is amazing.  Math is really hard, but she's so smart.  

So, a takeaway from the trip: Jas will be using makeup on me in the future, but maybe different brands.  Whoop-de-doo…?

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

There's three things you should never trust me with: the ability to mess things up further, someone that I love, and a secret.  I'm prone to messing things up, despite trying to be the best.  Emphasis on trying.  

Bookstores have a different vibe to them than anything else.  Their walls hold many secrets, if you're willing to listen.  If you're able to.  Most can't sense the paper's liveliness, even in death, or how each blot of ink means so much more than it seems.  

Vincent and Leo aren't big readers, so they went to look at the comics and graphic novel section.  A little immature I think, but I won't say anything.  

Of course, I couldn't really pick one section, scanning through everything.  The only genres I avoided were the aforementioned ones and the non-fiction area.  That's more Leo's vibe, and he will drag Vincent over to it at one point.  Cute, huh?

I guess.  I think it's nice to see other people living their lives, but it's not exactly my speed.  I want to live life focused on myself and my goals, not on someone else.  People are responsible for their own happiness, not someone else's.  That's too much pressure!  I know it's not normal to feel this way, though.  From how many romance novels Penny and Marnie have tried to get me to read, I know it's normal to want that someone.  Too bad though, because I don't want any part of it!  

Just looking, carefully sliding out books that seem cool to examine them.  I'm glad I grabbed a basket, because the books piled up.  Fantasy stories, books that seem to hold archaic knowledge, a few classics that I still haven't gotten my hands on, and such.   But I still got some cash to spare, so the hunt continues.  

Looking around, I saw a book that looked a little interesting on display.  In the self-help and self-discovery section, oddly enough.  A purple cover, with gray, black, and white for lettering.  Hm, a book targeted at people who aren't romantically inclined…  I don't often try the internet because Shane and Marnie have unrestricted access to my search history, so trying to discover myself on the device may attract unwanted attention.  

Speaking of, Shane kind of just floated around, so when he saw me, he made a beeline towards me.  Unfortunately, I was grabbing the book, and in an attempt to connect with me, he's gonna ask questions.  

"Heya sunshine, what's that book you got there?"  Uh, uhhm, eaugh…  Uh THINK FAST JASMINE!!

I set the book in my basket and grabbed one that Shane has heard me ramble about before.  "Do you remember that one series with the highschoolers that were hazed in an attempt to join a club, the series I talked about a while ago?  I found the rest of the books, and I cannot be happier!"  I started to pull out the two books, but Shane reached for the purple book and tore it from the basket before I could show him the distraction.  

He mainly looked confused as he read the cover.  "...  Asexuality?  Aromanticism?  Jas, you know you could have talked to me, right?  There's no need to rely on books all the time, y'know.  We have the internet for a reason.  Maybe I didn't give you the talk soon enough…  You could have asked if you had questions.  Jas?  You listening?"  

I just stood there.  Yeah, listening, but not exactly keen to.  I just took the book from his hand, or, more accurately, tried to.  He held on until I simply grabbed another copy, and crossed my arms.  Maybe I don't feel comfortable asking him!  He's a man into men, I am not as much.  Well, women too, but I ALSO am not into women.  Plus, I don't need the talk, I know about all of that stuff!  I can figure stuff out, on my OWN.  I'm fine.  I don't need help.  

I decided to not give him the joy of hearing my thoughts, walking away as simply as grabbing a copy of that book.  And just as I’d finally cooled down from the one outburst, good going! 

To which one of us?  Yes.  

The stationary section is where I found myself, pens and markers and all sorts of pretty stuff galore.  After grabbing a pack of scented pens, a sheet of stickers to put on my record player and a few other things, I checked out, and decided to just wait for the others in the car.  I wasn't going to face Shane until I had to after that.  What if he thinks I'm not normal?  What if he judges?  What if he tells others?!   What if people think I'm different, or weird, or bad for not thinking and feeling like everyone else?  What if I don't live up to everyone's expectations?  What if they hate me?  What if-

The car door's slam made me jump high enough to hit my head.  Ughhhh.  "Yeesh Blue Jazz, it's just me," Leo said with a chuckle.  "Any thoughts as to where we're gonna go to eat?"  And just like that, we were on the road again, with a newfound tension hanging in the air and a pile of books at my feet.  Nothing bad's going to happen when we eat, right?   

Chapter Text

  Jas' POV

---

I decided to make a fun little game out of what we were going to do for lunch, after everyone returned from the book store.  "Okay gang, game plan.  It's simple, and easy, but we may be driving a bit.  I can't let things be simple, ever, you guys know me.  We're going to play rock paper scissors, Shane versus Vincent and me v Leo, then the winners will play against each other.  After the first round, the winner won't get to participate for the next round, and we'll keep doing that.  There's four rounds, so each of us should be able to choose something, unless someone is really good at rochambeau.  I'm not gonna say what the winner gets to do until we're done.  Alright?"  I explained while talking with my hands, the habit sneaking out and making itself all the more noticeable when I accidentally hit Vincent.  In the face.  Ouch.  

"FUCK!  Sure, as long as you don't smack me again."  Leo and Shane agreed to it as well, so we started out solidly.  I turned towards him as we readied our fists, mine getting absolutely crushed when he played paper.  Instead of setting his hand on mine, as most do, he full-force smacked my fist down while declaring that he had won.  Fucker.  

Shane's reflexes aren't exactly up-to-date, as Vincent won his little standoff.  As the boyfriends played against each other, I placed a mental bet.  It'll be Vince, I know it.  

As Vincent triumphantly threw his arms in the air - "accidentally" hitting my side - he exaggerated his little, "Oooooops!  Sorry Jas."  That smug little look just made me laugh as we moved into the next round.  

"So, now that Vince can't participate in this round, we'll battle it out and then Shane gets to duke it out with the winner.  Make sense?"  Leo nodded after a second, even if his face said differently.  "Let's go, bird-boy."  And…  He won again.  Well, I'll make sure it doesn't happen next time!  At least this is something miniscule like a game.  

Leo won against Shane, yet again his reflexes slow.  I guess I could use that to my advantedge if he wins this next round.  And he did, throwing out rock because Vincent's first move is always scissors.  But I'm gonna best this old man!  He'll be accustomed to that, so if I throw paper, he'll be blind-sided!

Hypothesis correct.  He even looked a little surprised as I set my hand on his fist, probably expecting scissors.  Bam, bitch!  

The last round, Vincent won again "surprisingly", leaving Shane no choices.  Whoops!  "Okay, so now that we know our winners for everything, this is what we'll do.  Vincent goes first, and gets to choose where we get drinks.  Leo gets to choose the next, appetizers.  Then I'm choosing the meal, since that comes third, and Vince caps us off with dessert.  Make sense?"  We all thought for a minute, then Vincent cast his two cents into the conversation.  

"Yeah!  I'm choosing milkshakes for our drink, the one ice cream shop by the park.  They serve it with a straw, it's a drink."  

"Well, I wanna get onion rings and fries for appetizers.  Like, the snack baskets from the one place….  Y'know the place."  

"We're getting Mexican food from the restaurant with the funny owner, the girl with the silver afro."  

"And to cap it off, we're going to the Queen of Sauce shop, I want to get some pink cake."  

Our stops to each place just built up to the curbside lunch we'd have at the park, it's a tradition each time we come out to Zuzu City.  We take the food we grabbed, and sit on this specific curbside, eating and just having a good time.  This trip was worth the wait, even if some people don't know how to not stick their nose in other people's business.  

Today has been a good day.  As I went to bed, after getting home and sorting everything I had bought, that was the conclusion.  Looks like I was right!  

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

A few days later, I found myself in the same chair at Elliott's that made him think of going to Robin's place.  We regularly started talking about the book, and life, and problems.  Talking, which is me talking and him essentially acting like a therapist.  It's been going pretty well, even if I resist his advice without realizing.  

"I'm just kind of getting frustrated with him.  It's not like I hate him, I just…  Wish he would try to not pry in what he doesn't need to.  I understand it's his job as my parent figure to worry about me, but it's kinda frustrating when what he has done in the past caused these behaviors, and just now all the sudden he's worrying."  

Elliott patiently listened in, which is sometimes underappreciated.  Just having someone listen without making assumptions or judgment, it's nice.  Well, judgment I can see .  

"Jas, have you considered talking to hi-"  BANG crack.

Elliott was cut off by the door swinging open, Leo and Vincent's bold entrance making the shack shake slightly.  "BLUE JAZZ WE NEED YOU AT THE SALOON LIKE A-S-A-P AS POSSIBLE!"  Bird-boy's bright smile and Vince's mischievous gaze drew my attention from the conversation I was just having.  

Though the writer man did not look all too happy, slightly scolding the boys by saying, "You two need to be more careful, my cabin could easily break by such an action!  What gives for the intensity?"  

"Well I was serving my brother and I walk over and Abi looks more pissed than Kent in a mood while Sam looked hurt and Sebastian was trying to explain something and apparently he'd been going out with BOTH of them, so like two-timing, and they started yelling and shit and you gotta come see this, it's getting WILD!"  Vincent's long-winded yet quick explanation, with Leo's excited energy just made my head slightly spin.  

"Vince, the farmer's dating at least five people, including Sam, what's the big deal?"  Elliott's head whipped toward me, but we're going to just ignore that.  

My friend chuckled and gave me a rather peculiar look.  "Well Sebastian's already got to third base with both of them, supposedly
."  Oh.  Oh.  Oh sweet Yoba.

"We gotta haul ASS over there!  I wanna see how this fight ends!"   

Elliott piped up from behind me, a little bit of hesitance present in his voice, "Then go see the end of the outburst?"  

Vincent pointed at me while saying, "But I'm sure she would bitch at us a bit if we didn't tell her!"  Okay just because you're right doesn't mean you need to say it.  

Never a dull day in Pelican Town, huh?  Well, that's a lie, a huge lie, but I'm still intrigued.  

"Okay, let's go see how this ends!" 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Us three made quick work of getting back to the saloon.  The only time I've ever ran faster than that was out running a stray magma sparker….  But I'm pretty in shape, so it didn't take much out of me.  Vincent, on the other hand, just looked dead.  Man, I wish!  If I could run to death I'd be like Usain Bolt!

Wait.  That's not good.  That's unhealthy, as Dr. Harvey has said.  Maybe I'll stop over to talk to him soon.  Haven't been to the clinic in a hot minute!  

The tension in the room is, as Jas would put it, palpable.  The door opening, and the arguing A.S.S. trio were the only noises in the saloon.  

"Maybe I should just fuck Sam, what about that?!"  Abigail didn't really say it, she barked it out in Sebastian's direction, obviously madder than a hornet, with Sam fuming at her side.  

Our troubled trio were all peeking into the room, very interested in what the A.S.S. trio had going on.  And we're not the only ones, because EVERYONE else is staring their way, as if all the energy in the Stardrop was sucked into the little game room.  

Sebastian was standing with his back to the couch, the other two in front of him and advancing slightly, looking like they might kill him.  Even Gus wasn't stopping him, probably consoling Robin with a free drink to help her choke down whatever her son had done.  I feel so bad for her, and for Pierre, who's probably sitting at the bar, looking horrified.  Kent…  He's probably just mad that his son ain't swinging, and that his other son isn't doing anything about it either.  Vincent had gone to take care of Pierre, probably giving him the same treatment as Robin's getting.  

"Abi, don't be ridiculous-"  

"And you shouldn't be a two-timin' bitch!  I agree with her, if you're gonna be playing us both we should play around ourselves.  And she looks amazing on the beach, y'know."  

"Yeah, I've stared at those pink shorts more than I should…"  

"Abigail!"  

"Shut the hell up Sebastian, you don't get to say shit!  Sam, do we have an agreement?"

"Y'know what, why not?  Maybe that'll show you to not play with your friends."  

Sebastian left the saloon really quickly, eyes to the floor and shame showing on his flushed cheeks.  Wow.  Well, that's what happens in Pelican Town.  Things go down.  Like I guess Sebastian on both Sam and Abigail. 

Not anymore, more likely.  

I feel like that's kind of out of the blue, but Sebastian was always a bit shady, even if we've hung out.   Sam and Sebastian have been friends for forever, very close friends according to Vincent and the accounts of what he's seen, but there has always been some sexual tension between Abigail and Sebastian.  And in the valley, it seems like you can give anyone a bouquet really, as long as they're a bachelor and feel the same way.  And not a child.  I think that's the only reason Vincent hasn't got me one, though he'll most likely do it once I turn 17.  We figure waiting is the best idea.  

"What are you two staring for, come on in!  We don't bite!"  Abigail started laughing as she saw us two, her anger kind of melting away.  I'm scared of the rock eater though.  "I know that'll blow over in like a week, but he deserved to be confronted," she reassured Jas as she set a hand on her shoulder, as if she could sense the questions in her head.   

We hung out for a bit, a little uneasy until they had calmed down fully.  Jas was kicking Sam's ass in a game of pool when Vincent walked over, looking less than happy.  

"Sammy, Kent said he wants us home, now."  Almost midnight already?  On Fridays, Kent shows up and generally leaves at about then, as does most people, because it closes then.  The two siblings left, leaving just me and Jas, who made our way out.  

"Night boys, night Jas, but Leo, wait!"  As they all left, I turned around and walked to the bar, where Gus motioned me over.  He came out with a basket, covered with a small, red cloth.  "Bring these to Linus, he had them at one point and enjoyed them.  I know with Winter setting in soon, it's a little difficult to find food for someone without any gold.  I'm glad you have a job, because I would hate to have a little kid out there starving in the freezing cold.  Your house holding up okay?  Are you gonna be warm enough?  I have spare blankets if you or Linus ever need one.  Swing by whenever you need anything, okay kid?"  

As the saloon owner, Gus can talk at least two miles a minute, all with a smile and a cheery air around him.  I thanked him as I took the basket, answering his questions before making my way out.  He's nicer to me than I am to myself sometimes, what did I ever do to deserve his kindness, or anyone's really?  Nothing.  I really don't deserve kindness, huh?  I guess so. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

The next day, I decided to go talk to Harvey, because I've been having those thoughts again.  And they're not good ones, so they need to get gone.  I'm not sure why I even have them, they've just been there for a while.  They intrude on me whenever I'm just vibing, and it's tempting to shut the thoughts up with a bullet.  

I pulled up to the hospital, throwing the door open and exclaming, "Good afternoon Dr. Harvey!  As it turns out, sometimes thoughts don't go away with enough ignoring.  Can I talk to you about something?"  

He looked at me with utter worry and confusion, like someone had been leaving him bags of grape candy at his doorstep at 1:27 a.m. every even day of the month besides Tuesdays.  

We went back to his office, and he listened to me for a while.  But little did he know, once I start talking, I don't stop.   I'm not sure how long I talked for, but after I got through at least seven topics plaguing my mind, he set a gentle hand on my shoulder.  

"Leo, while I'm glad you trust me enough to talk freely, it has been two whole hours.  Maybe you should start journaling some of your thoughts?  It's a good way to practice penmanship and get your thoughts out of your head."  

"Oh."  

Hm, maybe I SHOULD start journaling.  It would help, as he said.  Plus, I could look back on my past thoughts and track growth!  It'd be at least some way to prove I lived years from now.  Y'know, if I manage to just die at one point.  

"Or, you could always talk to your friends about this stuff, I'm sure they'd be willing to listen."  

"Well…  It's not that easy.  I don't like talking to them because I know that they're already going through stuff.  Just as everyone else is.  I don't want to burden others with dealing with me, and that makes things hard to open up.  I don't want to bother people, because it's a waste worrying about me when they can be more productive with their thoughts.  And if I wasn't in this valley, or on this earth, people wouldn't do that, so another solution is just dying.  Y'know?"  

Harvey stared at me for a minute. 

" Leo…  No."  He sighed before explaining, "That's…  No good.  Do you ever feel like you want to sleep all day, everyday, just sleeping forever, or something close to that?"  

"Mhm!"  

"Or not die, but cease to exist?"

"Yeah!"

"Or perhaps even just fall into a coma and pass on, so you don't have to do it yourself?"

"Sounds about right."  

"Leo.  That's suicide ideation."  

Oh.  

Well that's no good.  

"And with the way you described their thoughts, you may be dealing with intrusive thoughts.  I suggest talking to people, please.  It's not…  Worth dying over.  Your brain can be wrong sometimes.  Come back soon, we should talk further.  Okay?"  

"Sure, thanks doc!"  And with that, I kinda just left, leaving Harvey more confused than anything.  At least I hope.  I really don't like when people are concerned over me.  It's just not a vibe!  

Worry is better wasted on someone who actually cares about themself.  Right?  

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Just another damn day at work.  The saloon wasn't really busy, so I decided to eat something while everyone drank away.  Somehow, we always end up with so many fucking leftover pizzas, so I took a slice and sat down.  Who even orders these pizzas?!

The first few bites went down without a problem.  Melty goat and cow's cheese from the farmer, nice and warm bread, flavorful, homemade sauce…  

Then, I noticed it.  The grease .  And this probably isn't good for me.  Why did I choose to eat?  I can feel the cheese still, like its ghost is stuck in my mouth.  The dough was so many fucking carbs, like a ridiculous amount probably.  And the… 

I think I'm gonna be sick.

This is more or less a regular occurrence.  The saloon bathroom and I are somewhat acquainted after my half-year here, although I've never had to clean it, luckily.  I got my job around after my birthday, figuring 16 was a good age to start working.  

Although this is way too familiar, I still hate it.  The worst part of throwing up is the burning.   Not even the retching or the act, even though it's all disgusting.  It's all the worst part, actually.  Well, until today.  

The worst part is someone walking in on it.  

It wasn't one of our every-day regulars.  Shane was probably still at the bar, talking to Gus, while Pam and Clint drank their loneliness and self-isolation away, respectively.  It wasn't even Gus or Emily, who had been making frequent visits back here to see a certain odd customer.  Her and Shane are so in love, it's disgusting.  Leo and I aren't though, because we're just built different.  

As the pizza left, Leah entered the bathroom.  Her and Elliott were here to celebrate one of his books selling a million copies or something.  Well, sorry for ruining that celebration…  

"Yoba's sake kid, are you okay?"   She's never been the best at talking to us kids, but she tries when she has to, so I give her credit where credit is due.  

I couldn't exactly answer her, because of obvious reasons.  But when it finally fucking stopped, my arms and everything else would not.  Stop.  Shaking.  I should have just stuck with a salad, like Leah gets at the saloon when she has no energy for foraging.  

"...  I'll take that as a no."  

I tried to stand up, but just fell right back over.  Shaking, unsteady legs, my head's spinning like one of Jas' records, and the wooden walls feel disgusting against my head, maybe I have a splinter now, and…  Ugh.  

"Leah…  Piece of advice: if you haven't eaten in 48 hours, don't eat pizza.  You will regret it."  

"I think…  Your eating habits warrant a check up from Harvey."  I'm not even disagreeing at this point.  "I'm taking you to the hospital," She said with finger guns.

That's Leah for you.    

"Oh, boo you whore."  

I'm not sure what happened next, because I tried to stand up and hit the floor.  But this time, it was like a swan dive, head-first.  Shit, that kinda… hurted a little…  I'm just gonna take a nap now.  Good fucking night, suckers.  

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

I woke up to a four-way conversation, quick and worried words thrown around with voices of reasons in the group trying to keep it calm.  After a minute of listening, I recognized the four people as Leah, Harvey, Shane, and Mom.  Of course Mom's worried, I never really considered how it would affect her, or if she even caught on.  

"Like I said before, I found him throwing up, and he said he hadn't eaten in 48 hours.  I think it could be a more-than-regular occurrence."  Thanks Leah, for ratting me out.  

"I've seen him excuse himself from our conversations at the saloon when he's serving me, and on that trip to Zuzu City with Jas he barely ate anything."  Well, other than stuffing my face with pink cake, yeah.  

"Oh, I should have asked him if he's eating well sooner….  It's my fault for not keeping track of him.  I don't know how I could just ignore him like that!"  Well, not ignore , just not notice.  I don't blame Mom at all.  

"Jodi, you're a busy person, these things sometimes just fly under the radar.  Thank you all for your input, it helps a lot.  When did you three catch onto his eating habits?" 

"Considering I'm in the saloon about every day, he's been like this since he started working, so most likely even before he picked up Emily's job."  

"Sam started teasing him for eating less maybe about two years ago, so sometime around then.  Oh sweet Yoba, how could I have not noticed…"

"Thank you all, it helps a lot to know what we can about the patient."  

Some of the people left, and two approached the room I was in.  One of them probably laid me down in one of the hospital beds earlier, which was a little odd but nonetheless appreciated.  It's just so weird being in here when I never really have been on the receiving end.

Mom and Dr. Harvey walked in, careful to not wake me up.  It's a little too fucking late for that.  He looked at me with apprehensiveness, unsure of what to say or where to start.

Mom, on the other hand, immediately hugged me, not caring about how odd it was considering I'm laying down.  She quietly started saying, "I'm so glad you're okay sweetheart.  You know you could have talked to me about it, right?"  

"Mom, I'm not honestly sure if you'd understand.  It's more black and white than some of the reasons."

"Honey I know, I dealt with it when I was about your age.  It's never black and white, no matter the reason."

Dr. Harvey interrupted us, going over a few concerns he had and some stupid medical stuff.  Jas would be able to tell it to me straight, instead of this long-winded bullshit.

"Hey kiddo, I'm going to have your mom leave the room so we can talk, just doctor and patient.  Okay?"

I really wasn't given a choice, because she left the room with a quick apology.  I didn't want her to leave, but oh well.  It happens, people leave.  

"Okay, just lay it on me.  Why haven't you been eating?  And don't try to deny or lie, I know you haven't been."

Well, where do I start?  At the beginning, I guess.

"...  And since that, I've developed the habit because I kept avoiding going into the kitchen because I don't want to be the target of my dad's moods, and it went from there."  

More like spiraled from there.   

"Well, I'm going to keep you for a bit while I study the data I got.  Just hang tight while I do that, okay?"  

I can't exactly leave if I want to, so, "Sure."  And there I did "hang tight," alone and just kinda there, half-asleep and half in dream land.  Well, until the door swung open. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

I think getting tackled in a hug is just a common theme with Leo.  He immediately asked if I'm okay and all that, just the normal stuff.  Even if it was basic, his caring and worry still means a lot.  He delivered a little message from Jas, and left, just because there was another visitor.  It was a bit of a blur, as everything is right now.  A little hazy, y'know?  

I wonder who it could be.  Maybe Jas, who got done with her lesson early?  Or Mom and Kent, because the former obviously is worried.  Even Sam, who has always been a caring older brother, even if he's a bit distant.  

But no, it was someone completely unexpected.

"So, a little birdie told me that Vincent hasn't been eating right recently."  

I looked at Haley, Pelican Town's bubblegum-under-a-school-desk bitch, who leaned against the door frame as she spoke before walking into the room.  "Well, if recently is in reference to the past, say, three years."  Her eyes widened a little in shock as I responded, most likely not expecting the duration of my food issues.  "And I thought my brother was the one doing drugs, you think birds talk?!  That's not good, blondie."  

She sat down on the bed, which I am not a fan of, before sighing and saying, "It's okay, y'know.  To be dealing with those issues.  I know it's essentially unheard of in our town, and guys are never really thought of as victims of eating disorders."

Eating disorder.  It just…  Sounds weird to fully say and think.  Is it really an eating disorder?  Well, yeah.  While I was thinking, Haley continued, "Considering I was the rich, popular, pretty cheer captain in high school for three years in a row, it just…  It happens, and it's okay."  Well no, it's not, but I think I catch her drift.  

Somehow, it's reassuring despite the last time we spoke she called me a bug-eating stain on this world.  And I still think she's a pompous bitch with an ego bigger than the sun to make up for her lack of brains.  As you can tell, I really don't like Haley.

"Just promise me that you're gonna work on it.  I can recommend some ways of integrating food back into your normal routine, or just tips to help you get through it."  

"Thanks but no thanks.  And thanks for the support and stuff, but I think I gotta speak with Dr. Harvey."  

She left quickly after that, and I didn't talk with Dr. Harvey.  I just sat in bed, still silent when Leo joined me again.  Thinking, simply just thinking.  Maybe I should have taken Haley's advice…  But what would it do when she had all the money and help and dietitians and stuff that she could get?

Soon enough, the doctor came back in and sent Leo out, so we could talk about what we'll do from here and how "recovery" will hopefully go.

Recovery?  But I'm not sick, I just keep not eating, which makes me feel sick.  And then when I eat, I feel sick.  Hm, maybe this is close to one…  Ugh.  That sucks.  I don't think I like it all too much.  Oh well, guess I have to take Dr. Harvey's advice.  Kinda hate needing to do it, but there's no other way.  Unless I just keep letting it happen, but then people will try to hold me accountable, and that's no fun.  

As I thought, I didn't listen to him, until he capped off his little speech.  "We'll work on it, and in time, things will get better."  

We'll see, doc. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

I had Jas over at my treehouse, because Vincent's not allowed to leave the house for a little bit.  Grounded, or something, after the whole hospital ordeal.  His dad is so freaking strict, it's kinda wack.  Plus, who the hell grounds their kid for having issues?!

I never really questioned his eating habits, because the few times Jas has, he'd snap or withdraw, and it's unsuccessful prodding anyways.  If Vincent wants to talk, he'll talk.  And I guess he never wanted to talk.  

We were laying on the bed, just holding hands and talking about life.  The three of us are super close, so neither of us exactly care if we're doing stuff like holding hands with Jas.  It's nothing compared to the other things we've done…  

I have so many stories.  But one of the best, was the one time that Sam and Sebastian wanted to hang out, but Jodi made him take Vincent too.  So, when that happened, he'd come hang out at the treehouse with me!  But, it was a rainy day, so Robin wanted us inside.  I distinctly remember seeing the two other guys kiss, and asking, "Guys can do that?!?"  And then, I proceeded to test it myself, and gave Vincent a kiss, to which the crowd - Sam, Sebastian, and Maru - went wild.   Just boys being boys!  

And we stayed like that for a while.  The conversation fizzled and stopped, so we laid in silence.  Well, until she looked over at me with a small giggle and asked, "Do you remember the one day you realized you liked Vincent?"  

"I remember it clear as day, Blue Jazz…"  

It was a night quite like this, actually.  To set the scene, we were sitting on the bed, the rain outside providing background noise to our silence.  We spend a lot of days alone and just vibing, but that day was different.  I have no clue why, come to think of it.  I don't know if I was just being a dumbass teenager, or if she was just going with the flow.  

She had been reading to me, some book about some unfortunate orphans.  I didn't really pay attention to the story, I just like being read to.  When we were done, she joked a little while laughing, "You always have your head on my lap, let me have a turn on yours man.  It's only fair!"   I should mention, I also happen to know that you can smoke the sap from this tree, if you dry it and break it into small pieces.  Those parrots knew what they were doing when they chose this tree.  But we definitely didn't do that, totally did not.  We are children of Yoba , thank you.  

So of course, like an idiot, I let her.  But she didn't do what I normally do, no, she just sat in my lap, facing me and still giggling a bit.  She gets really giggly when we do the thing we so didn't do, smoking the tree sap, which is a little odd for our rather stoic and level-headed Jas.  

One thing led to another, and we shared a few kisses, but the mood kinda changed.  I'm bad at sensing moods and such, but if you asked Jas, she would be able to give you an answer within a minute.  She can read energies or whatever, I don't really know.  

"Leo…  I don't think I like this."  

"Me neither, honestly."  

We ended up sprawling out on the floor, which is oddly comfortable for being finished wood.  We, we're odd creatures.  Us two and Vincent, we'll find just about anywhere comfortable if we're with each other.  Sleeping on the floor inside and outside, on couches and beds not fit for three people, even in the river once!  As long as it's together, we make it work.  

"Bird-boy, do you think you like guys?"  She spoke out of nowhere, and the question hit me like a freight train.  This is more than a wet bag of mayo hit, it's surprising and takes the words out of you.  

But not for too long, because I responded fairly quickly for being shocked.  "Yeah, but what about you?"  There's really nothing for her to experiment with, or any one for that matter.  She's the only girl her age, which makes things pretty difficult.

She shrugged, her dress making an odd swishy noise.  "I'm not sure I'm into anyone.  I've never really thought about romance in any way but disgust."  

Well, I'm not the same way.  

"Jas."

"Yeah?"

Here's the thing…  In the beginning, I thought I liked Jas.  When I moved here, I thought I liked her.  She was - and still is - pretty, and organized, and smart, and nice to be around, and normal , the exact opposite of me.  I thought I liked her, but as I got closer to her, I realized that I admired her.  I wanted to be like her, not with her.  We became friends, and the sort of "attraction" I thought I had towards her fizzled away.  It wasn't actually me being in love.  

But…  With Vincent, it was different.  Of course, as kids, I didn't really feel anything.  It started when we were 13.  The first time I felt anything that wasn't just platonic, we were hanging out in my house, and he grabbed my hand for some reason.  I didn't want to let go, and I had no clue why, but as I grew, I realized.  I realized it was a growing crush on him.  And by the time we were 14, I was head over heels for that boy.  But it was always him.  

"I think I like a certain boy."

".....  Ew.  I've seen him eat bugs before."

That same voice brought me back to reality as she said, "Leo, I gotta go.  I have a big day tomorrow, and I need to be well-rested for it.  Thanks for hanging out though!"  

She left without a word, which left me to just think, much like I did that night about my repressed feelings.  Even if I know her very well, she's kind of a mystery.  Wouldn't want her any other way, though. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

I started my morning like normal, performing my little ritual and immediately going out to the chickens.  I like beating Shane to them, because I don't have to deal with him, considering it has been kinda awkward since everything.  Although Autumn is coming to a close, neither of us are good at letting go of things, so here we are.  

When I walked into the room, who else did I catch taking care of the chickens other than Shane?  Charlie, his absolute favorite chicken, clucked to alert him as I stopped as soon as I saw him, which caused me to stand in the doorway awkwardly.

"Well, are you gonna come feed them or just keep them company?"

I somewhat ignored him, staring at our chickens, before he said something simple.  Just three words.  

"Jas?  I'm sorry."

".....  me too, Shane."

"Not about any of that stuff…  Well, partially that, yes, but also about just everything.  I haven't ever really been as good a dad as I can be, and it's always made me feel awful.  But despite me not exactly being there, you've done so well for yourself.  I'm extremely proud of everything you do, and you're more than enough of a reason to keep going, and to keep trying to get better.  I love you, Jasmine.  You're truly like the daughter I never had and I hope I can be a good enough father to you, someday."

"Damn Shane, there's no need to make me cry at six in the damn morning.  Though are you sure that Emily isn't the reason to keep going?"

He laughed a little while pulling me into a hug, which I probably needed.  Yeah I started crying, what about it?  I've talked with Elliott a bit about expressing my feelings, and had to kind of talk it into my skull that crying just happens, no shame.

We stayed like that for a while.  But then I remembered, I got some very important shit to do today.  Moving away from Shane, I gave him a simple reminder, and slipped out of the room.

And immediately, I was met with the smell of pancakes and eggs, and judgment.  "Jas, don't you have your big meeting today?  Are you sure that's appropriate to wear to something so important?"

I looked down at my outfit, a basic, rich red Renaissance-era dress with tan as an accent color, and black lacing.  My shoes were some simple Mary Janes, wanting to just take it easy today.  A set of hairclips, the same red color as the dress, kept my hair out of my face.  It looks like a nice outfit, I don't see the problem!  So of course, her comment about my outfit begged the question, "What's wrong with my outfit?"

Marnie glanced over and sighed, explaining, "Jas, you're going to Ginger Island, you'll sweat to death under a dress like that!"

"But I won't be on the beach, we're traveling further than that."  She looked a little worried, forcing me to promise that I'll be safe.  Of course I will, it's not like I'm putting my life on the line!  I'm simply just, y'know, doing part of my job.  Which sometimes may put my life on the line, but just slightly.   I really don't see her problem with that, because I have no qualms about it.  

After finally reassuring her enough to let me go, which took quite a bit, I set out quickly, hoping I won't be late.  Punctuality is key!  Especially before one of the biggest moments of my life, I guess.  

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

The walk to the beach is a trail I've become accustomed to, on a schedule so tight that Vincent knows when to come bother me, and Emily can time when to come out and accompany me back to the house, although I know she walks down to see Shane.  They're kind of cute, and it's nice to see him have someone.  

Even if the whole romance thing isn't for me, I really like seeing everyone thriving in the environment they're given.  Emily and Shane, Elliott and Leah, Leo and Vincent…  The list goes on.  

Today though, Vincent didn't even try to talk.  He knows today is important , way too much for a mundane to comprehend.  And when it comes to bleak, no offense to my friend, but damn he fits it to a T.  

Instead of walking over to Elliott, who was sitting on the exact spot where the waves fizzed out enough to not knock him over, in swimwear and with his hair up, I just simply waved to him and continued to the dock.

The dock is old and somewhat rotten, but it has an odd familiarity, reminding me of the moonlight jellies and the Luau when us kids would run off with mischief in our eyes.  Or those days that we'd accompany Leo to his visits to Willy, or Ginger Island, spending time on the beach and having an amazing time.  We-

"Hello young one, it's nice of you to join us."

The voice stole my inner monologue away, making my focus shift to the outside world.  Linus, the one who had addressed me, stood next to Mr. Rasmodius.  They're old friends, although I haven't really asked about it, because it's not really my business to pry and I don't feel the need to know.  For once.  

Going into Willy's shop with the other two people, the smell of fish hit me like a wave, but didn't exactly faze me.  Being raised around barn animals, you get used to not-so-nice smells.  Like shit.  And the blood of the weakest chickens.  

The men silently greeted each other with a nod, while I smiled a little at the shopkeeper instead.  Kindness isn't exactly it, but civility doesn't have to be the extent of it.  

We all paid for our tickets, boarding the boat in silence.  There's not much to say, as we all know what's about to happen.  Well, they do.  I don't!  

The ride out to Ginger Island is a fun one, always has been, and it always will be.  The ocean blue and sky blue meet for a beautiful effect, with the sea life that dares come to the surface giving everything a lively feel.  Although I hate the way the boat rocks.  Makes me kinda queasy.  

But soon enough, sand met the sea and the boat met another creaky old dock.  That was our cue to leave the boat, traveling through the beach's south resort and venturing west.  

It's obvious enough to anyone else that passes through, the farmer couldn't get enough of the farming life.  Pineapples and taro roots as far as the eye can see, shining iridium sprinklers with blue little pressure nozzles.

Now, I'm no stranger to this island, because Leo has taken us out to his old home, to show us everything that shaped him as a child before living in the valley, so these sights aren't really new.  

We passed a hut on the beach, with a rather old woman.  She joined our group, giving a small nod to Mr. Rasmodius and Linus.  I simply flashed another smile, even if I'm not a fan of strangers.  

And finally, we made it to a door, with a golden walnut.  I've eaten a few, though Leo is well on his way to becoming an elder in terms of walnut-eating.  The door's dark blue color was pretty, but a little jarring, most likely to make it stick out.  What's even behind that door?

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

What lay behind that door, felt as if it were a liminal space, a black room with cameras surveying the island.  The fortune teller from that show and a man with blue skin stood and I'm assuming waited for us to enter, greeting all of us by name.  It was a little freaky that none of them seemed out of place here, especially considering I have never seen Linus inside a building, but still.  

"And hello Jasmine."  Wait shit that's me .  I simply dipped my head, because the man with the funky hat looked as if he had more to say than just a greeting.  

"You've done so much to get here, your mentor tells me much, but what even is here?  Welcome to my golden walnut room.  Your friend, that golden walnut of a kid, has been in here, but I doubt he's told you about it.  Today, those of us who study and use the arcane practice known as magic to many are here to see if you're worthy enough to join our ranks.  My name is Mr. Qi, and fortune and mystery call to me.  I'm the owner of the casino in the desert, and of this very room."  

The cloaked woman from the show spoke up, and introduced herself as well.  "I'm known as Welwick, and as you can tell, divination and fate has grown on me.  I even have my own show on that tellie-vision, although I'm sure you've watched it."  

"The name's Birdie, and eternity and adventure has chosen to manifest in this bag of skin and bones."  The woman with the starfish in her hair went after Welwick, the adults slowly forming a semicircle around me.  Damn, they're going to sacrifice me or something from the looks of it.  

Linus smiled a little as he said, "You know me.  And if you can't tell by me not having a job and living in a tent, I embody nature and freedom."  

"And as the one and only Wizard, I pursue Elements and Spirits.  As Qi said, we're here today to see if you're worthy of joining our ranks, so to speak.  We all worked very hard to get where we are, and earn the titles we have bestowed upon us.  Due to the last one of us passing away years ago, you may be lucky enough to become one of us."  

One by one, they explained how they've gained their titles.  Welwick's able to tell the future with a premonition-like sense, always accurate albeit small snippets, the Wizard is just fucking insane and has been studying since… forever, Mr. Qi has an established currency and has run a casino for what seems to be hundreds of years, Birdie straight up voyaged to FIND HER HUSBAND'S BONES, and Linus is just a wild man, which I think is amazing.

But what have I done?  I'm pretty normal, not much to speak of in terms of what I've done.  I'm just…  Me.  Just Jas, not even anything really notable.  Plus, I'm only 16, that's so much younger than any of these people.  I don't have a gift, I'm just smart.  

"And you, Jas…"   Welwick put her hood down, revealing ice-blue eyes, ones that truly pierced my soul.  "Come here, child."  She motioned to a table, with her crystal orb, waiting to be looked into.  "What have you done…"  

"I see books, upon books, all read by eager eyes.  So many words, stories, anthologies even, all read by one eager girl.  I see friends, friends together while a girl stands alone.  Their hearts are well, alive, bleeding hearts worn on their sleeves, but the girl stood with a cold, stone heart.  Despite a stone heart, she loves, just not the way everyone wants her to.  A head of steel and a brain to match, sharp and ready for anything, seems to be the core for all her actions.  A strong, pragmatic soul.  I see an ever-helpful girl doing what she can for the people around her, even to the point of ignoring herself.  With a voice that can float like a butterfly and sting like a bee, she's truly able to communicate anything and everything."  

Mr. Qi stepped over and put a hand on my shoulder, scaring the hell out of me.  

I SOUND LIKE VINCENT!  He literally scared the cursing into me, what the hell man.  "Your education technically ended at 13, and you could have stopped it there, but you've poured yourself into learning, going so far as to disobey everyone and learn from the best of the best.  That truly sounds like someone who's enlightened, right?"  

"Yeah, you're not wrong."  

"And you're able to talk to anyone, able to get a point across three times and back, able to reason with the unreasonable.  You always know what to say in any situation, no matter how odd or horrific something may be.  Speaking one's mind is something that most fear doing, but you couldn't be happier to do it.  That describes a master of communication, doesn't it, right?"  

"It seems to be so."  I won't even question how he knows, it's above my paygrade to do that.  "So, I believe that would be your two specialties.  You'd be surprised how difficult it is to find someone like this, blessed with enlightenment and communication."  

"Jasmine, the mistress of enlightenment and communication.  Has a ring to it, don't you think?"  I tried to not laugh at Linus' joke, because no one else was, but it foolishly escaped me.  

Birdie smiled a little and said, "Well, the ocean calls out to me.  Let's just end it here, she's been deemed worthy of…  This.  Goodby everyone, until next time."  She left, then Mr. Qi let us leave, pretty neat.  I'm glad, but this literally has no effect on my life.  Mr. Rasmodius told me this before, but this still has no meaning in my life besides that this is the path I've chosen, mingling with the arcane knowledge we've forgotten as a collective society.  

That doesn't exactly sound like a well-put together description of what happened, but it really felt unreal and subsequently useless, so go figure.  Oh well, at least I got to see a cool room.  Or maybe it hasn't set in yet, that I've forced myself into a life I may end up resenting, cursed to stay with it until I lay in the dirt or a coffin.  Eh, whatever.  

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Leo and I were hanging out, just bros being dudes.  Well, at least that's what I'm gonna call it.  Since we admitted our feelings for each other, we've just been doing dumb shit like this, dumb shit that Jas would think is so cute and my brother would relentlessly tease me for.  Even though he and Sebastian are a sore subject, a little like what they do.  

I don't exactly know how it happened, but I got on Leo's lap at some point, and we just started kissing, y'know, homiesexual things.  I don't have time to have a crisis over my sexuality, actually.  I had time for it in the years that I've known Leo, and I think there's more important things than that.  Like having a crisis because you're scared of what your dad has to say about your sexuality.  It's really risky to do this type of stuff, because if I get caught, Mom will have my ass, but it's also fun because of the excitement and fear.  

Also because it's with Leo.  And I kinda like him.  

I'm not much to describe this shit, because it's kinda weird to describe how my boyfriend - such an odd word - and I kiss, but all I can say is shit feels nice man.  Also, I really wasn't prepared when he started kissing my neck, although he's not trying to be charming or suave about it.  He's dorky and cute, asking if I'm good with things every step of the way.  It's nice to know that he cares!  

Maybe our giggling tipped us off, or him quietly asking if what he's doing is okay, but the door's hinges creaked, almost apologetically for not staying shut, and Kent came walking in.  

Well, shit.  

I may as well be dead.  From the way Leo's hands are a lot closer to my hips than they should be, me on his lap a lot closer than need be, lovesick smiles on our faces, and a hickey or two are on spots Kent normally can't see, because I would never be caught dead without a shirt on….  I opened this can of worms, time to lie in it.  

Kent looked at us for a second, just facial expressions changing a lot.  First shock, because this is the second time he's found one of his sons making out with his best friend.  Then annoyance, because this is the second time he's found one of his sons making out with his best friend.  Afterward, a bit of disgust, because this is the second time he's found one of his sons making out with his best friend.  Of course disappointment followed, because this is the second time he's found one of his sons making out with his best friend.  To cap it all off, he looked angry, because this is the second time he's found one of his sons making out with his best friend.  

He tried to keep a calm, level voice as he told Leo to, as he stated, "Get the fuck out."  Well, I'm in for it now…  Despite bracing for yelling or worse, all I got was a door slam, and minutes of trying to not freak out.  Kent really just caught me, making out with my boyfriend.  I'm half-way expecting him to come in here and question me about why my "friend" was kissing me.  

I put my shirt back on, not wanting anyone else to see what Kent saw.  As the shirt slipped over my head, I heard the door open, pulling it on quicker than I can get Pam's drink to her at the saloon.  And by the way, my record is 3.47 seconds.  Shit, who could it be?

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Sam peeked his head in and slowly entered my room, putting a finger up to his mouth, signaling to shut the hell up.  He got on my bed and put an ear up to my wall, so I did the same.  

We're a nosy bunch, but it's okay when people are talking shit about you.  "People" happen to be none other than Kent and Mom.  Well, him more so than her.  She's never been one to talk ill of her children.  She's a good mom.  

"Let me get this straight, Kent.  You barged into Vincent's room, found him and Leo kissing, and you're disappointed."  

"Jodi, it's my fucking house!  I can go in my sons' rooms whenever I please-"

"And catch them doing the same things we did at their age?  At least they weren't doing the same thing that resulted in Sam!"  

"We raised them responsibly!"  

" I raised them, Kent.  You were out serving as I raised our sons single-handedly."  

"I've been here since Vincent was seven, don't you dare fucking say I didn't help you raise him!" 

"Then why does he avoid you, Kent?  Why is the one son that you supposedly helped raise scared of being around you?"  

"....  Jodi, I don't know what you mean."  

"Haven't you noticed?  Staying in his room until you leave the house?  Never serving you at the saloon?  Always standing by me or Sam when we're out at festivals and have to be with our family?  Avoiding being with the entire family, such as dinner when you actually feel like being around us, by staying with Jas or Leo?  Working as much as he can at the saloon on nights you don't go?  He's been avoiding you ever since…"  

"Don't you dare fucking say it, woman."  

"Since you put your hands on me.  On us ."  

"Jodi, what did I say?  You always have to bring up the past, don't you?!"  

"That's rich, considering the PTSD you refuse to get therapy for!  Maybe you should consider going to family counseling.  I know it'll be a healthy way to sort out all of our issues with each other.  I'm so damn tired of our family being fragmented because of it.  Because of you.   For Yoba's sake, our youngest son is terrified of you and our oldest son genuinely detests you.  When was it last that you were called dad?  By either of them?"    

"....  Years ago."

"Exactly.  Kent, it's seriously time you consider trying to help fix the damage you've caused ever since you returned, because there's no true fixing it."  

"How many times have you tried to bring it up?  How many times in the past years, Jodi?  And how many have I told you that I'm not doing it?"  

"Kent, I don't exactly think this time I'm asking.  This time, I'm telling you, we're getting some family counseling."  

"Who's paying for it, Jodi?"

"You, unless I go to Harvey and show him the photo proof I have of your destructiveness.  Then it's also you, but more money, because he sure as hell will make it clear that you're not getting the veteran's discount if it's through him."  

"...  Fine."  

"It'll be better in the long run, we can finally have that family we've dreamed of since we were 16.  Don't you remember how excited we were when we found out I was pregnant?"  

"I do…  I still don't like the idea, but if it makes you happy, we'll do it."  

"Alright, let me call a few contacts I have!"  

Sam and I looked at each other with the same confused expression.  While it's not unlike Mom and Kent to argue, it's so weird that they aren't yelling.  And that he's letting it happen!  Score, honestly.  

Wait, that's not good to be happy about.  But can you blame the kid that has only ever known a missing and broken family to be happy at the chance of fixing those cracks?

Chapter Text

Elliott's POV

---

One dreary, cold day that nips at the nose and stings the lungs as they fill, I decided to stop by the town's saloon to grab a drink or two.  As the scent of pizza and the lighthearted laughter enveloped me, the "vibes," as Jas would say, are truly immaculate.  Leah waved to me, but before I could walk over, a rough and scratched-up hand grabbed my wrist and dragged me over.  

Shane was the one that motioned for me to sit down at his table, obviously a little disgruntled and concerned.  Harvey also stood near, not as exasperated as he was tired, but some worry did show on his face.  

"Elliott, I am so glad that you showed up, you have no clue how much we need to talk."  Of course, I have not a single hint as to why Shane needs to hold a discussion with me, and Harvey as well by the looks of it.

Their conversation halted at my arrival, so I decided to pick it up by asking, "What vexes you, my friend?"  He started to try and explain, but not a single word came out of his mouth, simply a few noises and a long sigh before anything comprehensible.  I understand writer's block, but that's just a tad pathetic.  

"Jas has been talking to you about her issues, right?  Because she's been off for the past few seasons, and I'm simply worried.  I'm just concerned, especially with her friends not doing well, what if it's rubbing off on her?"  

"What do you mean, exactly?"  

"Well, I've been talking to Vincent recently, and I can tell their entire little group isn't doing well.  One's got family issues, one's dealing with an identity crisis, and Jas is just…  In her own head too much.  Actually, all three of those apply to all three kids.  Well, besides the family stuff and Leo. "  

An unexpected person inserted himself in the conversation, bringing drinks out for Harvey and I, while giving Shane another sparkling water.  "If you're gonna mention me in your fucking conversation, you can at least include me.  And maybe Jas just doesn't feel comfortable opening up to you, dipshit."  Vincent, the little barkeep that replaced Emily, has always been a little sassy.  Well, a little, just as little as his height.  

"Jas has been talking to me, but Vincent has a point.  All I'll say is that she's been dealing with her issues in a more healthy way, and been doing better."

"I believe all the kids have been confiding in someone, but I assure you Shane, their issues are not rubbing off on Jas."  Harvey tried to reassure him, a soft smile and a gentle hand on Shane's shoulder.  While Harvey said, "Just relax a bit, doctor's orders," Vincent raised an eyebrow and just looked at him.  

"Bitch this is a saloon??  I don't think this is the place to be going doc mode."  

I didn't even scold him for the usage of profanity, because we all started laughing a little at the obvious statement, the joke helping Shane calm down and just enjoy the night.  I understand it's stressful being a stand-in parent, but Marnie's been taking care of her for a while.  A lot more than him at least. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

Scorching sand, crashing waves, and stolen piña coladas.  The beach is always a nice escape, but Ginger Island is on a whole other level.  Especially since it's the Winter season back on the mainland, it's a refreshing break from the snow and bitter cold that has enveloped Pelican Town.  

I wore sandals and sunglasses during the trip, because the sand is always liable to go from stinging to hellfire in a matter of minutes and the sun fucking HURTS man.  No clue why, but it happens.  The other two didn't, simply wearing their swimwear, but that just goes to show that I'm the brains of the group.  

Because it's the beach, my outfit doesn't really have to match, which Elliott's been suggesting I try to think a little less about.  Self-image is everything when it comes to perfection, because outwardly always wanting to seem perfect starts from the inside, so he figured it might be a way to start breaking from holding myself to an impossibly high standard.  

It's been a season or two, so his advice is starting to show some varying degrees of success.  Luckily there's nothing to match with my swimsuit, just a simple, floral one piece, because I've been trying to focus less on exactly perfect matching.  Yes, I like looking good, but that's besides the point.  

"So, what's been up with you kids?"  Sam's hair covered his face as he spoke, the gel unable to stand against ocean water.  I don't even know why he put gel in today, because he was the one to suggest coming out here.  We come out here every so often and just shoot the shit, trying to relax with the problems that plague us back at home.  

It's a way to escape those issues, even for a few hours.  Multiple topics came and went, including but not limited to, Vincent and Sam's home life, Leo and Vincent, the fate of Sebastian, Sam, and Abigail's relationships, my lack of one, my "uptightness" and "seriously crippling addiction to being a smartass," Sam's actual addiction, Shane and I, and looped back to how family counseling is going.  

We were the only people there, save for Gus, Penny, and Maru, who didn't really bother us.  Of course since we were already talking about our relationships or lack thereof, we started gossiping about the town's different relationships blooming.  Of course, it's all speculation, but it's about as much "speculation" as Marnie and Lewis.  And Shane and Emily, Harvey and the farmer, Leah and Elliott, Haley and Alex, and Penny and Maru, although we had to keep our voices low for that one.  

It's still sad that people seem to settle for each other out of convenience, like our resident jock and cheerleader, but as I've come to terms with and looked into who I am, it's a little easier to ignore.   Shane took it well, because he never really expected me to be into anyone in town, but Marnie was a little confused.  Nonetheless, she had the spirit, and that's always appreciated.  

I'm glad that some people aren't settling.  There's a reason I keep seeing Shane with a lovesick grin as our favorite crystal bitch comes to visit.  It's nice to see love actually be a thing, even if some people in the valley aren't really feeling it.  

A rough hand on my shoulder made me jolt, as Vincent said in a mocking tone, "Earth to Jas, are you there dumbass?"  I just sighed, looking at him with the same tired, sullen look his eyes always seem to hold.  

Leo's cheery demeanor was a nice break from that, asking, "Do you wanna go exploring a bit?  Maybe we can find some coconuts!!"  He can crack them open with literally only his head, what an absolute madlad.  I stood up, the boys wasting no time on running to the island north, us three finding ourselves running with each other quite a bit.  

Running to catch things, running to places, running to see things, running from our issues…  The list goes on. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

Leo took the lead, with Vincent following closely behind us two.  We had a little process, where we go in and we find all of the trees and ginger.  Shaking each tree, vigorously and without tiring one bit.  And digging each piece of ginger from the ground was also a process, first moving the sand, finding the root, and making sure it doesn't get buried or destroyed in the process.  And of course, finding a few golden walnuts to act as fortune cookies in Chinese food, just a little treat afterwards.  

Then, on our way back over from the North area, we harvest it all, and then repeat for the West portion.  Of course, we split the work three ways: I dig for ginger, Vincent gathers the coconuts, and Leo scours for our golden walnuts.  We always meet south of Birdie's hut after gathering our supplies, to fish for a few of whatever we can get.  Luckily, we don't need anything else so far, and we need nothing that we don't know how to get.  

After a small chat with Birdie and reporting our haul, we do something that would make Marnie gasp in surprise and get a scolding from Shane.  It was Vincent's idea to start doing it, and we hadn't stopped since.  Maybe that's the sign that it's a bad idea.  

We quietly walk over to the farmer's island pad, taking a few taro roots as we go along.  The next step is to find a few of the trees.  Just normally a mango tree or two, and we shake, shake, shake until the fruit falls and eager hands catch the colorful food.  Then, we take the best pineapples we can find, and we take three, before doing a little thing I like to call, more severe crime.  

Now don't get me wrong, I don't normally do this, and it makes me feel somewhat uneasy, but the farmer hasn't been out for an entire season.  It's free real estate.  Plus, the crops will most likely grow back before the owner of the stolen goods returns.  At least it's going to be used well.  

No one locks their doors here or in town, so we simply walked in without a second thought, careful to not leave any dirt tracks on the floors.  We borrowed the kitchen, cooking some poi, a few bowls of tropical curry, some maki rolls, and as many bottles of ginger ale as we were able to.  The only thing we used from the farmer's fridge was a few hot peppers, though we always leave money and small gifts as the unconsented exchange.  

Vincent pulled out 5,000 gold, and set it on the counter, right in between Leo's golden coconut and my stack of solar essence.  We at least pay the farmer back for what we've taken, so I call it mostly even.  Well, more than, because the farmer is technically getting a profit higher than what is achieved by just selling the food.  

We set out once more, but once we got back to the resort area, Vincent stopped me.  "Jas, go tell Sam we're going to be a while."  

I don't know why he's telling me to do it, because, "It's your brother, you should go tell him!"  

"Jas, I need to have a word with Leo."  His voice dropped real low as he closely leaned in, gently touching foreheads.  This is normal for us, actually.  "He doesn't seem right.  Spacey, and you know what that means."  

Yes, I do.  I do know what that means. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

While fishing, I had a thought.  An idea even.  Maybe an idea that I should act on.  Maybe.

The fish look so peaceful in the sea, and in the pond.  They're just swimming, out in the water, enjoying the coolness of the pretty blue water.  They're simply existing, not a worry in the world beside finding food and not dying.  I'm not concerned about that part, though.    

I wish I could be like that.  Relaxed, not a care in the world, happy-go-lucky, living with variety instead of the same old, same old of every day.  Going with the flow, unlike the stagnant, unshifting air of the ever-repeating daily routine.  

I kinda want to swim with the fishies some days.  Today especially.  

It's not that I'm not enjoying today.  It's been great actually!  Cooking is one of my favorite activities, always really fun to just make something to enjoy, knowing it was from your own hand.  And of course getting into trouble with my friends is worth it, but successfully not getting in trouble is even better with them.  Jas and Vincent are a fun crowd.  

But…  It's just…  Some days, it's like a switch.  I'm fine, then flip, and great googly moogly it's all going downhill from here.  

Speaking of them, as she went over to talk to Sam, Vincent put an arm around me and started walking towards the island's east area, my past front yard essentially.  It's a beautiful, lush area with shades of deep greens and beautiful compliments of brown, the type of area I could just lay down and pass out in.  Or sink into the dirt, never to be heard from again.  Get swallowed by the grass.  That'd be nice.  

"Leo?  Are you with me dude?"  I looked down to see his slightly annoyed expression, sighing and pulling me into a hug.  I don't mind it, it feels nice.  I'd let him choke me, but maybe not in the hot way.  

"We're worried about you.  Y'know, Jas and I have caught wind of your, uh…  Issues, with living and all.  You can always talk to me, you know.  I wanna be here for you, even if that means just staying with you a bit more, or something as major as moving in when I'm old enough.  I wanna be here for you.  Man, you're literally my fucking boyfriend, if anything happened to you I don't really know what I would do with myself."  

His little speech was muffled by his head essentially buried into my chest, though if he wanted to claw it open and rip my heart out instead, that wouldn't be too bad.  I'm not a masochist though, I'm just suicidal.  

I don't know why I think like this.  Sometimes, I just want to not really be on earth, and then other times I'm just vibing.  It's weird, like I'm up, then I'm down, then I'm down, then I'm up, and I don't understand, all I know is that sometimes I wanna go see my parents.  

Who, y'know, are fucking dead.

Maybe I should.

Maybe I just might.

Maybe.

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

The days following our trip to Ginger Island were rather boring.  I stayed at home mostly, relaxing, helping out with the animals, and messing with all of the new stuff I accumulated over the two seasons.  Now that Winter is in full swing, it's a great time to stay in with it all, to keep the boredom at bay.  Since Vincent's at family counseling today, and Leo's off with Linus or working, I'm bored between lessons with Mr. Rasmodius.   

Reading is such a simple thing that makes me feel so many emotions.  I won't lie, last night Shane asked if I was okay, because I was crying over a character's death.  Just absolutely sobbing.  This just happens sometimes, and each time he sighs a little, shakes his head, and gives me a hug.  He will never know what this feels like though, to cry over something so stupid .  

But is it really stupid if it makes you feel things?  

I always assumed that being pragmatic was part of being perfect.  Not letting emotions get in the way of rational thoughts and actions, but really, perfect people feel things.  Everyone does, really. 

But I can only read so much until I get bored, so when Vincent knocked on my bedroom door, it was a welcome dent in my routine.  Or, well, I thought so before I actually went to the door.  I knew it was him, because of the way he knocked, and because no one else does, besides Leo.  Everyone else just has all the audacity in the world.  But sometimes, it's not fun when your friend shows up late at night.  

His demeanor made me feel uneasy.  Eyes whipping from side to side, constantly looking over his shoulders, brows furrowed above wide eyes…  Yeah, it makes me feel uneasy.  Plus, it's like 11:30 p.m., he should be at home if he knows what's good for him.  

"Jas, I can't fucking find Leo."  

"He's impossible to lose, what do you even mean?"  He's literally six feet tall and maybe one of the most unique people in the valley, it's really hard to "lose" him.  That's like losing a sunflower in a poppy field!  

His words came out fast and panicked as he explained, "I literally can't find him Jas!  This is serious!  We were supposed to hang out at the saloon today, but he hasn't turned up after four whole hours, so I checked his treehouse and the surrounding area, even his workplace!  But he isn't anywhere, no one's seen him for a while, I can't fucking find him!"  

Oh.  That is…  No good!

"Would you please help me look for him?  I'll look from the community center area and up if you look from town square and down."  He didn't really give me a choice, handing me a walkie-talkie and dragging me out in the pouring rain.  

I went inside one last time, to grab something that might help.  The reading light that Maru and Penny made, a godsend considering it's battery-powered and I can actually use it out here.  The light blue light felt strange out here, adding to the unsettling feeling the entire situation gave me.  

Where in the world could Leo have gone?

The search was maybe about an hour, Leo being in the last location I thought he would be in.  I first checked all of the forest that surrounded my home, then the town, looking in every single building still open, and even some that weren't with this handy thing called windows, then around the abandoned Jojamart and that surrounding area.  But, I didn't expect to find him on the beach.  

Sure, I know he used to hang around Willy a lot, but I can never really imagine him on the beach.  The only beach I really can see it happening is Ginger Island, because he lived there and all that.  This place is pathetic compared to that.  

The walkies were used by us two when we were young, although they still come in handy from time to time.  I radioed in with, "Vince, this is Jas, we found our man, beach dock.  Come to the beach ASAP, over."  

"Will be there in like two minutes, I'm running as fast as possible.  Vince out."  His voice crackled with static, and sure enough, minutes later he joined me.  "Okay, now let's go in, thanks for waiting."  

And just like that, we approached the creaky dock, trying to not alert our friend.  But of course, I had to go and step on a particularly old board, creaking under my foot like a sorrowful note sung to the sea.  

Leo turned around for a brief moment, a sullen look fitting for the dark atmosphere outside encompassing him.  Hunched over, tired, just overall a very foreboding-type vibe.  

Silently, we sat down on either side of him, not daring to say a word.  Who knows what's going on in Leo's head?  Certainly not us. 

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Who really knows what's going on in my head?  I sure don't.  

I felt a hand on my shoulder, and an arm around my waist, but I didn't look up from the sea.  The dark, inviting, killer void that lay beneath us three.  Just a simple jump and I'm already sinking, weighed down by my rock pockets.  I think rocks are cool, but sometimes things can be used for other things, like causing death.  Of who?  You decide!

Well, I decide.  And I would choose it to be me, if it weren't for these meddling kids.  Now I can't send myself careening off the edge, that would terribly scar my friend and boyfriend if they saw that!  

"A coin for your thoughts?"  Jas moved closer, probably feeling how cold I am.  

My thoughts?  Really wanna get into that?  Well, let's delve right in.  

A lot of the time, my thoughts are normal.  But one little thing sets me off, like a little switch, and I keep thinking, and thinking, until I'm spiraling into a hopeless pit of despair and self-loathing, and the only way to get that to stop is either pills or a complete silence from my brain.  And I can't get pills, so it's only the mental descent for me!

I really lose myself in the thoughts.  I'm glad it's mostly when I'm alone, because it's so bad when I'm around others.  And at Ginger Island, I felt it especially, just being in a place that reminds me of a time when these issues weren't present.  When I was as normal as can be and so ridiculously weird.  

I was really better off on the island.  Carefree, alone, happy, curious, free, hopeful, unburdened, and innocent .  So, so innocent.  But moving from the island, along with the opportunities it gave me, ruined a lot of that.  Society makes you care, isolates you because you're different, makes you sad because of it, wants you to conform and makes you hate curiosity, tries to mold you into the shape it wants, crushes your hope and adds all these burdens, and strips you viciously of any shape of innocence you have.

On the island, I wasn't aware of the tragedies the world has to offer, but the valley gave me insight.  At least I don't live in Zuzu City...  

And that's only a little bit of my thoughts, because it's hard to explain.  It's a real, "you have to be there to see it," type of thing, but unfortunately, I am the only one that can be in my head to see it.  

And it's especially odd, when I'm having my little spirals, it feels a little out-of-body.  I can kind of see myself dying in certain ways, like sinking into the sea on the island, or falling off a cliff, or jumping into the lava, or letting the monsters get to me, or being the monster that gets to me.  

I'm really a monster for thinking all of this, aren't I?

So, I summed it up.  

"Well, I washed up from the sea to the land, and I kinda want to go out the same way, y'know?"  

Jas blinked a few times in mild surprise, as if she kind of didn't expect this, but at the same time did.  And Vincent, oh dear Vincent, looked so confused and a little revolted, but overall concerned.  After an agonizing silence, he finally opened his mouth.  

"....  No, I fucking don't know, Leo." 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

Well, that's not what I was expecting , but I'm glad we're here with him.  His dumbass would try to drown himself.  

"I have to agree with Vince on this one, I don't relate in the slightest.  But we're here for you, if you need to talk or need some company.  Just because we don't experience it doesn't mean we can't try to help."  

Leo feels insanely cold.  Frigid, even.  Hm, that just won't do!  He's normally able to withstand the Winter weather he's still not accustomed to, but considering it's an extremely cold Winter's night, and he's been out for Yoba knows how long, it's a bit harder to do that.  "I know it won't solve your problems, but do you want to come over?  I'll read to you, and make you tea.  You need to warm up!"

Vincent gasped a little, before immediately saying, "We should have a sleepover!"  

Leo and Vincent both looked in my direction, with wildly different expressions.  The former looked tired, so done with everything, hopeless and upset, while Vincent seemed a little excited at his proposed idea.  

We haven't had a true sleepover in so long.  I define a sleepover as an agreed stay at one of our houses, with food and talking until at least midnight.  And I think we have a lot to unpack here, so…  Sleepover time!
I remember one time, when we had a sleepover at the ripe, old age of 11, Leo and I decided to throw Vincent up to the tippy-top of the tree.  While we were successful, he lost his branch, slipping and hitting so many on the way down, falling….  Right into Linus' tent.  No one was happy in that situation, but it does make for a great story.  

"...  Sure, why not?  Might as well, nothing better to do now that you guys ruined my plans."  I'm glad he agreed to the plan, OUR plan, although Marnie and Shane may not be too pleased with the boys staying over tonight.  No particular reason, they just don't like the boys staying in my room.  Though I bet Shane will let up a little, ever since the bookstore incident.  

We all got up, shaking the snow that had accumulated off and started to make our way off of the beach.  But not before a long-haired figure with a lantern emerged from Elliott's shack.  No shit, the shadowy figure is Elliott.  

"What business do you children have to attend so late on this briny shore?  Make your way home, it's simply chilling to the core out here!  Plus, being sick for the Feast of The Winter Star would blow, wouldn't it?"  

We did as he said, because he was obviously in the groove of writing and I wouldn't want him to be mad, passing by Vincent's house without him stopping in whatsoever.  He really doesn't want his dad to know where he is, huh?  None of us really blame him though, with a temper like that it's best to keep distance.  

When we got to the ranch, we opened the door, and…  Well, that's no good, I guess. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Shane and Marnie stood by the doorway, not looking too pleased that she showed up with us two here.  Shane honestly looks like he's just playing along, but Marnie has never been too keen on Jas having boys in her room, at least when she's around.  Jas always says she encourages it, because Marnie wants her to date one of us, but I guess we have different ways of interpreting things.  

Fat fucking chance though, because I'm with Leo.  

Jas would normally be worried about their opinions, but her concern was nothing short of gone.  Her normal worries have almost all but faded away, and she's really working towards not freaking the fuck out when people might think less of her.  We've all been working on stuff, even if it's going to be a long process.  Way too short to show in just one story, that's for sure.  

We breezed past the adults and went to the kitchen immediately, us guys taking a seat and Jas messing with stuff in the pantry before turning her little electric kettle on.  That thing is so weird, but she swears that it's useful, so I don't tease her about it.  

Well, much.  "So, how's your little teapot working ever since you dropped it on Shane's foot?"  Leo snickered from beside me as Jas let out a huff, about to give me the same response she has multiple times.  

"It was an accident!  He scared the ever-living hell out of me, ok?  He deserved it, trying to spook me like that.  Even if he succeeded, it wasn't nice."  

Jas was still messing with shit in the pantry, which was kind of fun to watch, because she's the shortest of the group, and she can't reach anything.  I'm a solid two inches taller than her, but it makes all the difference.  Every inch matters, and I am not talking about my dick.  

Side note, it's terrifying to see the lengths she'll take to grab an item from not even the top shelf.  

After a small debate over whether leftover pizza should be heated on the stove or in the oven, a new presence in the room made itself known by saying, "What's cooking, sunshine?"  

Jas was actually cooking something, but she didn't seem too amused at Shane's joke, giving a very over-the-top, fake laugh.  She motioned to something on the stove, and made small talk with him, mainly communicating through motions to her best ability.  Not sign language, just Jas things.  

Her focus was once again brought to the cooking, leaving her godfather with us two for company.  He's been at the saloon most nights, spending some at Emily's house instead, which is an upgrade from every night alone with a kid on the clock to keep him company.  

"So, are you two doing okay?"  Shane has still been checking on my home life from time to time, which is nice, but things have been getting better.  There isn't too much to report, other than the slow yet steady progress we're making.  And Leo, but it's not like I'm telling anyone about that.  

Leo also asked, curiosity piqued on a subject that he already hears about every week, which is what gets me to actually speak.  I didn't want to say too much, so I carefully said, "Well, Sam and Kent have a lot less reasons to fight now.  And the therapist is trying to get me to call Kent, "Dad," which I absolutely refuse to.  Dr. Janney just ain't gonna make me do that bullshit.  Otherwise, pretty okay."    

A few topics of conversation later, Jas brought over three cups of tea, biscuits, three breakfast sandwiches, and two small bowl-dish-things, one containing a yellow substance and the other with strawberry jam.  No clue what the yellow stuff is, but the fact that she made us a really late dinner is nice.  Sometimes, food still makes me squeamish, but it's getting easier to eat without thinking about it.  

"I can see you staring, it's custard dumbass."   

"Hey, language!"

"Shane, my name is Jasmine, not language."  

Sometimes, a group of friends having fun is a group of friends eating breakfast sandwiches for a very late dinner and laughing at an old man.  And I couldn't be happier about being with these shitheads.  

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

After eating, us three wound up in my room, all chilling out in various spots.  Leo laid on the floor, I sat on my bed, and Vincent ended up sitting at my desk, in an office chair.  He spun around in the chair while we all talked about nothing and joked about everything, never able to be serious past one in the morning.  

Because they're over so often, we have clothes for them to sleep in in case situations like this happen.  It's nice having friends that are close to you, so much that you know them down to their shirt size and preferred sleepwear.  

And some more time passed before we declared it was time to sleep.  I, of course, took the bed, while they just laid on the floor on my rug.  To be fair, it is a very comfortable rug, and they're cuddling, so they don't exactly care.  

"Blue Jazz, I see you staring.  If you wanna join us, just say the word."  

"Blegh!"  

"Okay, suit yourself."  Vincent laughed at us two, before a few minutes of silence fell over us.  I feel like I should be doing something, maybe catching up on a few chapters of Elliott's book, not just laying here and letting the minutes pass by!

Wait, no no no.  Rest is important, if I work myself into a rut I can't work at all.  

Getting comfortable is always a struggle, because I normally feel like I have to use every moment of being awake to its full potential, but Marnie's managed to find a few phrases that remind me it's okay.  You can't always work, or you'll work yourself into the ground, and then you're forced to take a longer break.  

Sometimes, I just have to repeat it until I'm too comfortable in bed to get up.  And hope to Yoba I don't get up to pee.  

I looked over at my night stand, spying two books, one stacked on the other.  On the top, Elliott's book, with Leah's art of a fairy sitting in a poppy on the cover, and under it, the one book Shane got really curious about in the book store.  

After reading the latter a few times and thinking over everything - I've done, and do, a lot of thinking - I came to a simple conclusion: fuck romance.  Just entirely, it's not for me.  I'm very content without a romantic partner, and who needs it when you have friends?  

"Hey, can I tell you guys something?"  

— 

"So, let me get this straight.  You'll gladly sell all of our souls for a good book series?"  

"Without a doubt, Bird-Boy.  Without a single doubt."  

We spent the night just talking, first about the original topic at hand, but then things spiraled a little.  The sun's gentle rays started peeking out, brightly judging us for not getting an ounce of sleep.  

"Fuuuuuuck, sun's out."  So eloquently stated, Vincent!  

The sun's slowly filtering in through my curtains, the chickens are noisy as always, and I can tell today will be a good day. 

Chapter Text

Evelyn's POV

---

The Feast of The Winter Star is a time that fills me with a warm and jolly feeling, even if these old bones can't take the cold as well as they could in my youth.  When I was just a little girl, I remember standing in front of the tree and holding my father's hand.  Such a joyous time for this community, still as vibrant as the star atop the tree.  

This year, I was tasked with giving Vincent his gift.  Even though I'd like to think I know everyone in this town well enough, that boy escapes me sometimes.  As he's grown, I have too dagnabbit, and I've become a little out of touch with the children.  

It felt bad to not know, but I figured the child might be happy with a box full of my signature, double-chocolate chip cookies.  I even had Alex wake me up early to bake them so he could get them fresh.  It takes a community to keep one happy!  

Every single time I see the beautiful red decorations, the rugs and the table cloths, my eyes are drawn to the green that contrasts it.  Even if my eyesight has been going to the way-side, with my old age and cataracts, the tree is still a beautiful sight.  

After spending time primarily eating with family and loved ones, everyone scattered and started mingling, which makes it a little difficult to find the boy.  And if I need to go look for him, I have to leave George here…  Which I don't like doing.  

The snow makes his wheelchair go haywire sometimes, making it difficult for him to move on his own.  If I didn't have Alex to help take care of him, I don't know what I'd do.  I'm extremely glad he's going to stay in the house until he inherits it, and beyond that.  

Haley had wandered over and joined our little table, happily chatting with George and Alex.  She's surprisingly a big help, cleaning in spots I can't reach and cooking when it becomes too much for little old me.  She's matured throughout the years she's lived in our wonderful valley, thankfully.  

I asked and he was happy to help, as always, and I was off to find the children.  Where one is, you'll find the other two, as if they're conjoined at the hips.  At least, most of the time they are.  But on a day like this, they might be visiting with people they don't see as often.    

As a young lady, I would have run around, hunting for my secret friend with boundless energy and stamina.  But as the age has gotten to me, slowly walking and scanning my surroundings a few times is the way to do it.  

First, I found Caroline and Jodi gossiping about who knows what, glancing at their husbands with content smiles and slight contempt in their eyes.  I'm glad George and I never became that way, but it's good that Jodi's family are attempting to fix the issues.  With therapy.     

Behind them at a table, Elliott, Willy, Harvey, Pam, and Leah all sharing a bottle of wine and one of mead, my favorite drink back in my days of saloon visits and tipsy dances with George.  It's nice to know that someone has taken over our little tradition, specifically Robin and Demetrius.  Their family, along with Sam, had a tense game of war going on, and Sebastian seemed to be in the lead.  

Marlon, Clint, Kent, and Linus watched as Leo gave Abigail a sword, as purple and shiny as the amethyst that I've seen her eat.  We have such weird children in this valley…  I have no clue why she wants to go fighting in those mines!  It's dangerous!  Though I understand she's studying to go treasure hunting and monster slaying out in the world, so it's good that she's getting prepared before her departure soon enough.  

And almost out of sight, behind them, Marnie and Lewis spend another year staring at the tree and ignoring the fact that everyone in the valley knows about them.  Some things just never change, as constant as the snow in this chilling season.  

Maru, Penny, and Jas were shooting the breeze, next to- oh, there he is!   

I eventually found the one I was looking for.  Vincent was at a table with Gus, Emily, and Shane, who were holding hands.  It's nice to see the older bachelors falling in love, it gives me hope for this valley's life.  Maybe it will become as vibrant and bustling as when I was young.  Someday, when I'm watching the valley from above, maybe.  

She waved me over with a wide, short box in hand, handing it over as soon as I reached her.  "Mrs. Mullner, this is for you.  I know your old cardigan has been fraying a lot, so I knit you a new one!"  What a sweetheart.  I thanked Emily and turned my attention to the original reason I came over here.  I sure hope he'll like his gift! 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

"I wasn't exactly sure of what to do, but I know you used to like cookies.  Jodi would always apologize when she found you and Jas at my house, happily munching away on them…  You're always welcome to stop in for one if you catch me baking them, but I understand you're a busy young man, with work and such."  

Cookies.  

A rather big box, full of cookies.  I stared at the sugary treats in the box, always taking a minute to process that this event means cool gifts, now that I'm older and it's not a huge deal anymore.  The smell hit me like a freight train, a little overwhelming, but they look so fresh and soft.  

I do remember, as a kid, anytime the scent of baking cookies caught my attention, my mom literally could not stop me from going to Granny's house.  Jas often was there already, not really being supervised much because of Shane's work, bar, sleep cycle, and Marnie's focus on the animals, especially ones named Lewis.  

I also remember when Jas and I introduced these to Leo.  He was so fucking happy, an overjoyed bundle of sunshine and squawks.  What a dork.  That's why I like him though, he's an absolute dork.  MY dumbass dork.  

Then, a few weeks ago, being in Robin's kitchen while Sebastian and Sam attempted to adapt her recipe to be a bit more green, not in the vegan way.  Even Jas was in on the fun, suggesting Leo's magic tree sap and white sugar as a substitute combination for brown sugar, instead of molasses.  It's not even a euphemism, I don't know why, but Leo's treehouse has sap you can actually smoke.  But I haven't done that, no , for we are all children of Yoba, that god none of my friends or I believe in.  

Sam's been using edibles more, since the smoke from his normal method sends Kent into his episodes.  I'm glad they're working things out, all the fighting was, and still is, so fucking annoying.  

I picked one up, just contemplating eating it.  Should I?  What about all the sugar?  

Eh, I should eat it.  I tore off a piece, the chocolate still slightly melted.  That looks so fucking good.  Still can't believe it, deadass a whole box of cookies.  Man, I love Evelyn!  Sweetest person around here.  

"Granny, this is the best fucking gift I have ever gotten."  

"Hey, language!"  

"Can it Shane," his girlfriend responded before I got the chance.  Emily's cool, she even lets me crash on their couch on the now-rare nights that Mom and Kent are at each other's throats.  

I popped that bad bitch in my mouth and didn't think of the calories for even a second.  Just chocolatey, chewy, soft goodness.  

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

Maru, Penny, and I were talking about life and how it's going before the farmer came up and gave the teacher an emerald.  That left Maru and I to stand awkwardly together, only really speaking because of our mutual friend.  Well, girlfriend for her.  

That was, until I felt a tap on my shoulder.  A slightly spindly finger, just boney enough to raise suspicion while passing as normal.  A flash of green, along with a motherly, kind tone.  "Hey Jas, are you ready for your gift?"  

Of course, the normal reaction is to shudder while turning around.  I am 99% sure that Caroline is actually the witch, based on so much evidence.  

Physically, there's a few things that make me wonder.  Her natural hair being green, much like many people from the Gotoro Empire, which is often the origin of many mystical happenings.  As I mentioned earlier, she's bony, a little frail even, but I've seen her lugging around the heaviest of crates to help out her husband.  Her eyes give off a weird glow about them, if you catch her at the right time.  And maybe a few other characteristics tip her off, I'm not so sure though.  

A few things I know about her also make me question her.  She grows many things in her garden, including tea leaves, which can be used for tea leaf readings.  It's an interesting craft, to say the least.  She also used to take "long walks" to Mr. Rasmodius' tower, which isn't suspicious at all, totally not.  And Abigail's obsession with the occult that she constantly tries to snuff out is something, it's in her blood.  

And things that point towards it, such as Abigail's obsession with all of that, the Witch's hut always being empty, Mr. Rasmodius telling me to never drink tea in his tower, Pierre wondering if Abigail is even his, the list goes on.  

Making assumptions is something that I've always done, but done well.   And well…

But this isn't about that.  I nodded, not wanting to have anything come out of my mouth that may raise suspicion about my suspicion.  In response, she opened her bag, pulling out three books.  But… 

These aren't your average books.  They're spell books.  

I opened one immediately, seeing hand-written notes about certain rituals and ceremonies.  Uhm, well, that's a little suspicious.  That's also a bit interesting to say the very least.  

"I found these when I was digging around and cleaning for the new year, and since you're studying with the Wizard, I figure you'd want them.  It's a formidable career path," Caroline explained away with a smile that bordered sinister with her last sentence.  But wait…

"How would you know?"

Silence.  Silence is what I was met with.  

"Well, Happy Feasting Jasmine!"  

"And you too Caroline…"  

That bitch is a goddamn witch.

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Feast of The Winter Star has been extremely fun!  One of my favorite holidays in Pelican Town, honestly.  All the familial love the valley gives to each other is a welcome difference from the solitude of island life.  It's so sweet!  

This year, Abigail was my secret friend, so I gave her a galaxy sword.  No big deal, I know she's been traversing the mines for years now, and has been visiting the Volcano mines every once in a while.  She's working up the courage to go into the Skull Mines, and I hope that will be a nudge in the right direction.  

After gifting her the sword, even though I heavily prefer the hammer, I wandered over to the food.  Gus' candy canes are so freaking good, I always make sure to stash a few for later.  

As I was eating one, I felt a hand on my shoulder.  A firm, strong grasp.  

I don't like this!

I turned around, facing Kent.  Kent.  I….  

I don't like him.  

For his treatment of his family, and my boytoy!  And yes, I did steal that term from Jas.  What about it?  

But here's the thing.  I don't like him, so no amount of funny things I can say in my head makes me any happier.  Why is he even bothering me?  He kinda hates my guts, because his son and I are pretty gay, especially together.  I'm not saying Kent's homophobic, I'm just saying he definitely hates gay people.  And I'm gay people.  

"So, I'm your gift-giver this year."

Great googly-moogly it's all gone to shit.

I stood there, just waiting to see what he cooked up.  It was awkward for all parties involved, meaning me and me alone, because I don't give a damn about that man's feelings.  What could it be?  A bomb, like he's been mailing the farmer?  A meaningless thing that was thought of at the last minute?  A bit of gold, to buy my thankfulness?  What could it be…

"I'll be straight with you ki-"

"Unlike I've been with your son."  I choose violence.  Maybe I’ve picked up a thing or two from Vincent.  

"Okay listen here you little shit, that was out of line, but oddly enough on topic."  

AYO??  What does this man have for me?  I'm actually intrigued.  And considering I don't like talking to him, it's…  Interesting.  As if he could hear my question, Kent pulled a small box out of his pocket, and I took it.  What….  Is this?  

And as if he could hear that question, he explained, "So, I know you and Vincent are in love.  In the valley, there aren't really any other options for you two, besides Jas, and let's be honest, she's way out of your and Vincent's league."  I have no clue what that means, but he continued, so I didn't ask.  "Everyone can see that you two are meant to be.  I know it's only been about half a year for you two, not very long at all, but I can tell that you two are genuinely in love.  It reminds me of Jodi and I when we were younger…"  

I decided to take a peek into the box, and…  Two rings.  Rings.  What's so special about these rings?  I don't get it.  

"Jodi and I don't come from anywhere near Stardew Valley.  Even past Zuzu City.  And since we didn't get married here, we followed our homeland's traditions.  It's up to you whether you want to use a Mermaid's Pendant or our old engagement rings, far in the future if you get married, but it would be meaningful to him.  To our family.  And I guess you're a part of it now."  

What.  

I blinked a few times, just more surprised than anything.  "Oh, well thanks sir."  

Wait, he's already thinking about marriage?!?

Yet again, it's as if Kent can read my mind.  "Jodi and I rushed into our marriage, because I enlisted at 18, so it feels a little normal to me to already think of marriage at your age.  But you're young, don't ruin your freedom for someone that's willing to wait."  

"I'll keep that in mind."  

We were silent for a minute, until I took a cake pop from the table and left.  Too awkward, also he literally just talked about me marrying his son.  I am deadass 16, what is he THINKING?

Just because he's working to fix his familial issues doesn't mean I forgive him immediately.  Until I see the change actively benefiting all of them, I can hold a grudge.  Even if he gave me a meaningful gift.  

Marriage, what was he thinking?!

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Well, this is an odd scene of sorts.  A New Year's Eve party at a place I've never been to.  But let's set it first, shall we?  

We're all out at the farmer's place.  Outside, specifically.  There's tables of food and alcohol galore, filled with snacks and sweets for all to enjoy, and some savory items scattered about.  All made by the farmer, presumably.  

Mead, wine, beer, pale ale, and other drinks litter the area, some discarded cups and bottles lying about.  The place is a bit of a mess, with that and a corner set aside for fireworks, farthest away from the animals, so as to not disturb them in their sleep.  The farmer's at least caring.  

We're all ready to see them, and we're all ready to fuck shit up.  But, who are all of us?  Well, buddy, I'm glad you asked.  

There's Leah and Elliott, getting down on the makeshift dance floor, and despite being a little older than most of us, they know how to party.  And know how to consume wine the quickest.  

There's Alex, who challenged Sam to a drink-off.  Bottles cover the ground, and Yoba this is worse than the fucking saloon.  And of course, I'll be the one helping him into bed, and helping him not face Kent's wrath.  Oh Yoba.  Well, they can't save me now.  

There's Sebastian, tracing the rim of his glass and chatting with the farmer, who has Harvey by the hand.  He looks nervous, almost as if he has no one else to talk to with his “friends” occupied.  Sucks to suck.  

There's Maru and Penny, shamelessly flirting while sober.  Probably the most sober adults around here, at least.  Just a pair of girlbosses, nothing to see folks.  

Emily and Haley, despite the latter not living in their parents' house anymore, are joking and teasing as if they're still around each other 24/7.  It's nice to see the two get along, especially as Haley stopped being as much of a bitch when living with her boyfriend, Alex.  

There's Jas and Abigail, talking the exact amount of shit that I'm talking in my head.  Bottles don't exactly litter the floor near them, but a neat collection has formed by their feet.  Interesting, considering Jas is younger than me, I think.

I'm a little fucked up right now too.  

And there's Leo, standing next to me, hand holding mine as he drags me to a secluded area, filled with trees and hardwood stumps.  

"You okay dear?  You look tense."  Leo's voice was light, with a playful tone, as if he'd been doing something he shouldn't.  I'm not going to question it, it's been a fucking night.  And no, I'm fine, I'm just tired and want to go home.  I want to sleep.   It's almost fucking midnight, I should be in BED.  

I get a little cranky when I'm tired.  That's what happens when you essentially work two shifts a night, every single fuckin' night.  Instead of responding, I hugged him.  It just so happens that I'm pretty light, so he picked me up and spun me around a little.  It's cliche, it's stupid, it's cringy, but I love it anyways.  

"Come on, let's find a spot that's more secluded."  And we did just that, started looking around for a spot.  We eventually settled on an area filled with hardwood tree stumps, like a little sitting spot in the woods.  Perfect place to sit down and take a fucking NAP.  

We sat down, and I leaned onto Leo, maybe a bit more dramatically than I should have.  

Actually, no, because I'm never dramatic enough.   

He laughed a little and let me be a little silly goofy, complaining about my tiredness in the way a 1700's peasant child would complain about contracting scarlet fever from their bed to a worried nanny, but not because the child is sick, but because she doesn't want to lose her job.  

Oh so woefully.  

"Aww, well maybe you'll get some days off for the new year.  And you always can complain to me, like the little bitch you are!!"  

Aw, I love him!!

With the new year coming in, I met with Dr. Harvey and worked out a plan for the year, to officially start working on my issue, from a medical stance.  Fine, I'll admit it, it's a huge problem.  And we have to work on it.  

That's not my resolution though.  My New Year's resolution is to find out Dr. Harvey's first name.  It can't fucking be Harvey.  He's Doctor Harvey.  

Leo set me on the ground and plopped down next to me, just looking up at the night sky.  For a while, we listened to the sound of grass moving in the wind, until it turned into grass being stepped on, and someone else joined us.  Jas didn't say a word, just dipping her head and sitting down next to us.   

"Oh hey Jas, the fireworks will go off at midnight, ri-"

BOOM!

Well shit!  The fireworks went off, which made me flinch.  But that slowly melted away as Leo gave me a peck on the lips, and watched them with me, Jas on my other side.  Maybe this year will be nice.  As long as I have my friends, I think it will be. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

---

"Elliott, like I've said, I feel like I'm making no progress.  Like I'm still stuck in this loop of thinking I'm doing better, then doing something that disproves it, over and over and over again!  It makes me feel like it's not worth it, like I should just keep doing what I normally do, even if it wears me out and drives me insane.  Shane's tried to assure me that's not the case, but it's hard to believe him.  I don-"  

"Jas, what's that on your skirt?"  

Something's on my skirt?  I guess it wouldn't be too hard to tell if something's on it.  It's a white tennis-style skirt that I've paired with an aquamarine-colored tank top and some high-tops.  All bright and light colors, which seems to attract anything and everything.  Especially goat hair.  

I looked down, seeing a small dot of something yellow-colored on the hem.  Oh, yeah.  "Eh, accidentally got a bit of mustard on my skirt.  It's not exactly a big stain, so I can live with it.  I got vinegar at home to remove it if need be."  

Elliott raised an eyebrow as he asked, "Jas, you realize what you just said, right?"  

No, not really.  He took my silence as a no, and sighed.  What, I just explained I'll remove it later!

"I know you'll figure it out if you think about it for a bit.  You seem to not pay attention to things you don't find important, which oddly enough gives you tunnel vision but opens your eyes to everything you need.  You're a bit of an odd phenomenon."  

"Well, yeah, I don't really care about things that aren't important.  Like a little stain."

Wait a damn minute.  Did I just say that?  

So that's what he wanted me to realize.  

Laughter erupted from Elliott as I realized what I said.  Sometimes I just take a second to realize that I'm growing as a person!  He's seen me change quite a bit in less than a year, actually helping a lot.  I'm extremely glad he gave me that copy of his book, which I thoroughly enjoyed, because if he hadn't I wouldn't have had this supporting force.  

Elliott is the force.  He's…  Something, and not in the way that Shane is something.   Shane's just a hazard to the public and I love him dearly.  Elliott though…

It's been about a year.  My birthday's in about two weeks, and Spring is slowly fading to a close.  And in this almost-year, I've learned that Elliott's a slight menace.  But in a kind, gentlemen-like way!  Like how he's laughing at me to the point of breathlessness.  And the batshit crazy things he'll unpromptedly say to me sometimes.  Like how he talked about kissing Willy at one point while blackout drunk, a mistake he said he'll never make again, which made me giggle a teeny bit.  Gay people, what the fuck.  

My disbelief at my own words prompted me to say, "Well that's some character development, now isn't it?"  He couldn't laugh at this point, drinking a bit of water to hopefully regain his breathing rights.  He nodded, spilling a bit of water on himself.  I can't look at this man seriously ever since the New Year's Eve party, so seeing him be careless and goofy like that night isn't surprising.  

We talked more, somehow going from a stain, to color theory, to patterns, to camo, to Elliott's time in the military as a young man.  From the first to the last topic, you would never guess we'd go from here to there.  

"My parents truly thought it would change me, they thought the kid with a piercing and the dream of becoming a writer would change from four years in the military.  Well, jokes on them, because I grew my hair out and moved multiple times to get away from it all.  It's good to have a sense of self, but not when your self-image is your top priority.  No one's perfect, and I'm glad you're well on your way to recognizing that."  

"No one is perfect, besides Marnie's animals."  

"That's not….  Yes, Jas, besides Marnie's animals."

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

My days off are far and few, so after manning the saloon with Emily for a few days, Gus gave me a week off.  He came down with the flu, and didn't feel good enough to work, so Emily stepped in to help me out.  It was odd being the frontman, but I can see myself permanently doing it someday.  I've always wanted to move on to bigger things, but I could be content as the owner of the Stardrop Saloon once Gus gets a bit too old to run things.  And that may be soon, because as I've aged, he has too.  

Oddly enough, Haley and Dr. Harvey both confirmed that people like us tend to enjoy cooking for others, but not eating the end product.  As Gus has let me do more and more, I've found that cooking is one of my favorite pastimes.  It's super fun and a nice way to show my appreciation for others.  

We got an official diagnosis not too long ago, some bullshit like atypical anorexia.  I don't care about my weight, but the effects are quite like the most "common" type, so that's where we landed.  The diagnosis bullshit is between Mom and Harvey, for the most part.  I just know there's a problem, and know the steps to fix it.  

Haley has surprisingly been a big help.  While Harvey is able to give the medical advice and talk from the professional side, although he has admitted to having a few tricks up his sleeve due to - as he put it - "specific situations in my youth," Haley's able to talk freely from the personal side.  And it's helped me a hell of a lot more than Harvey's advice has.  

Shane's also kind of helped, always giving me a slice when he orders a saloon pizza or just encouraging me.  Unfortunately, he was kind of a father figure when I was little, with Kent serving out in the war, so it's easy to just listen to him.  Even the nights I'm over at Jas' place, he'll either get Marnie to make me something or do it himself.  He never had an issue with eating, because he was a varsity gridball player and had to eat, but it's still nice.  

While Harvey has set up a dietary plan and all the other shit doctors do, Haley's been giving me tricks to actually make the magic happen.  She gives me the tips that actually proved to be useful, and more importantly support.  Her, my friends, regulars at the saloon, and my family (minus Kent, for the most part) have been a good support system.  Even the family counselor has touched on it, giving my family a few tips on how to help out and support, even if they've found the methods that work the best.  

She recommended baking.  Baking, because it's so helpful to work really hard on some food, so hard that you'll want to eat what you made.  Today, it was a classic rhubarb pie, with fresh fruit from the farm.  And it's a process to make it, for sure.  

Mom and I started at 9 in the morning, and it's already noon, once we finally got it into the oven.  Cooking with her is always super fun, but baking is a whole other ballpark.  Because of the required preciseness, she's always trying to make it exact.  It always turns out amazing, so I don't say anything about it.  She knows what she's doing!

We sat at the table, deciding to wait the hour out in the kitchen, so as to not forget about the pie we worked so hard on. 

Mom took a sip of her green tea before asking, "So, how are you feeling right now sweetheart?"   

"I'm so excited to try the pie."  

Her look of surprise caught me by it as she asked, "You're excited to eat?"  

"Mhm."  Yes, I'm genuinely excited to eat.  It's been hours, and it'll be an hour more, and I want to try the damn pie!  Plus, I haven't eaten today, so I should eat something.  Haley told me to get foods I really like, because it'll motivate me to eat, and so far the advice has worked.  

She got up and hugged me, which just made me smile.  "I'm so proud of the progress you've made since you landed yourself in the hospital.  I know there's more to come, there will most likely be relapses, and it's going to be a long road, but I'll be here with you every step of it."  

"I'm glad I did, even if I didn't want to be there.  I still hate the hospital."  She gave me a disapproving glare with my statement, but I hold strong to it.  I just hate the hospital!  Fuck the hospital.  All my homies hate the hospital.  

We continued talking, eventually ending up on the topic of foods we need around the house.  The rest of the hour was just discussions of the like, the oven's dinging cutting us short.  

That pie smells so fucking good.  

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Another day, another journal entry.  I took Dr. Harvey's advice, journaling my issues and thoughts.  But, that turned into writing something I'm looking forward to today.  It's a simple exercise that makes me think about what reasons I have to get up today, and no reason is not an acceptable answer.  

It was a simple plan, but I've been doing it quite literally every single day since I stayed the night at Jas' house.  I came down with a cold and had to explain to Harvey, "Yeah I contemplated drowning myself because I wanna go see my mom, and I'm tired of being set off on mental loops of self-hatred because of the littlest things, and I miss what I had even if I have a better life here, and society sucks, and don't feel like I deserve to waste supplies like food and oxygen, so that's how I got a cold."  A little embarrassing, to say the very least.  

Harvey was kind of shaken up after that.  The first time someone in town tried something like that, he definitely was as well, but this seemed…  Worse.  I wasn't even there, but from the way he reacted to learning what happened…  I think a piece of that man's soul left him.  I know it.  I guess it's even worse when you know a kid was thinking about it.  Well, as much of a kid a 16 year old can be.  

Jas and Shane were both extremely worried after the whole ordeal.  I didn't know why until Jas sat me down and explained what happened when she was younger, with the farmer and the cliff top.  I didn't know that she's had experience with people in her life attempting, even if mine was a chickenshit coward's consideration of it.  

I flipped through the pages, trying to find the place I left off.  Ah, there it is!  I like re-reading my entry from the day before, it always helps me with what's worth it today.  My penmanship isn't the best, but it's better than Vincent's, that's for sure.  

I like writing.  Writing is soothing, fun to do the scratching onto the paper with a pencil.  Not a big fan of pens, because the ink doesn't even taste that good.  Most importantly, getting my silly little and not-so-silly big thoughts out is always helpful.  

I say what I'm writing out loud, today's entry being, "Today, I'm getting up because Maru is stopping by later.  She told me it's a surprise, so I'm not allowed to know why.  But I know it'll be fun, because Maru's always super cool to be around.  And we always have such interesting conversations, because she's willing to teach me about whatever my little brain's curious about at the moment.  I can't wait to see her."  

I got around for the day, setting the journal and pen where they belong.  I got the journal from Elliott, who didn't pry but probably heard it from Jas.  I know she talks to him about the stuff that bothers her, and it really seemed to get to her after the night we spent at her place.  

It's just….  I don't know how to feel about it all, and I was the one that thought of it.  

Three strong knocks on the door got me to rush down and check who's there.  And, it's-

"Hey birdman!  Like I said, I'm here."  It's Maru!  

She held a lidded woven basket, with a cloth slightly spilling out of the openings.  We said our hellos and made our way up to our usual spot.  The tallest branch on the tree house that supports our weight, a nice perch that overlooks the town area.  It's nice to sit here and take in the view, especially when I'm not considering falling from it.  

She opened the box and gave me a paper plate, us both having one balanced on our laps.  Our lunch was green-olive cheese dip pinwheels with some sour cream and onion chips.  She knows where it's at, and we simply have the best food taste in town.  

Maru told me she'd teach me how to make it, and I don't doubt her.  A while back, she expressed a lot of concern about a kitchen in a tree, but I figured it was better than a campfire that would clutter the walkway.  

She started talking about bees and pollination, seeing one buzz past as we ate.  There's never a silent moment when we're talking, which is why she asked, "Are you okay Leo?"  

To be fair, Maru doesn't chat.  She rants .  It's nice, but I'll space out if I'm not careful.  Often, spacing out means thinking the thoughts I don't want to, but they've been less frequent.  I'm better at staying in the now, and spacing off seems to be happening less too!

It's not that easy, and I know it.  It's never that easy.  But things are only going up from here.  I honestly can't picture myself jumping off the branch, despite the fact that it's super tall!  Every other time I sit here, it's on my mind, but not this time.  I know for a fact I'm doing better, and healing.   

I'm glad I can't picture it as well.  Those thoughts really got to me, but journaling, and a bit of still talking to Dr. Harvey has really helped.  I think I'll pay him a visit soon!  And that's not the only thing I do to help.  I confide in Vincent and Jas, they're truly my lifesavers.  She's always there for me, and Shane's shared what his therapist has told him to help out.  And of course, Vincent's good when I need either a distraction or someone to just talk with.  

Having a system is truly the one thing that has kept me going.  My people are the best, actually.  

"Yeah, I am Maru.  I'm doing more than okay."  

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

Another fucking night at the saloon.  Another conversation between Emily, Shane, and I, with Gus laughing at us "youngsters" and Clint sulking at Emily and Shane's hand holding.  Another pizza split between us three, and another night of work that doesn't feel too boring.  I like nights like this.  

Normally, our conversations aren't profound or very serious.  We're just shooting the shit more times than not, but tonight is a little more serious.  We're talking about relationships. So exciting.  

I don't exactly like talking about it, because of the way some people in town are.  Some people have some serious internal and external homophobia in this town.  Alex was definitely crushing on the farmer, but settled for that blonde bimbo bitch.  And his grandfather, George, definitely knows how to give a mean-ass stink eye.  I know this, because he was not happy with Leo and I saying we’ll dance together at the Flower Dance.  It saves Jas from dancing with either of us, and works perfectly.  But some people just…  Don't approve.  Like Kent.  

But Emily and Shane are definitely going to have their last dance this year, or at least in a few years.  I can tell that they're getting married at one point, we all can, even if he might be apprehensive about moving out with Jas still under his care.  She's most likely going to inherit the ranch and the Wizard's tower both, though I can tell Shane wants to stay there, despite it being Marnie's ranch.  Emily will probably be willing to move in, although she's supposed to be taking care of their parents' house.  

Why is love so difficult?  At least in this town.  Goddamn.  

Ugh, I fucking sound like Jas.  Rambling on and on about a topic, just absolutely ragging on outdated customs.  

"Vincent?"  Emily got my attention with a hand on the shoulder and my name.  "Has Kent relaxed about you and Leo?"  

Well, long story long, he has very mixed feelings.  He knows what it's like to fall in love young, and knowing that your heart is set on one person.  He knows it so well, considering he met Mom in middle school.  He married young, and had to suffer the consequences of that.  He wants me to live my life and not back myself into a corner, even if that corner works out comfortably.  

He also wants grandkids.  Yuck.  He wants me to experience the joys of having a kid, like he did.  And I tell him adoption is an option, and that I don't like girls, and that it's not his decision to make, but he doesn't want me to come to regret those words.  I doubt I will, but that's not the point.  

And he was raised Catholic.  In Stardew Valley, most don't follow Christianity, but it very well does exist, and that's how he was raised.  Not every Christian is homophobic, but Kent is!  

But he wants me to be happy.  And if that's in the arms of another man, so be it.  But what if I change my mind?  What if I'm unhappy?  And all that blah blah blah.  I don't care, because Leo and I can make things work.  I'm sure we'll have a nice thing going, like we do now.  

So, "Long story short, no."  

Emily frowned slightly while Shane said, "I'm sure he'll come around.  And plus, it's not like there's no one else in town like you.  You always have people here for you, Vince."  

"Yeah, I always have you fucking bar flies waiting for me to get here so I can start doing rounds."  

His grumbles mixed with her giggles, to create a sweet little cacophony with all the background noise.  Like how my brain feels when I'm around Leo.  I like it though, it's like a warm static that makes me feel all nice.  Man, I miss him.  

"But if you didn't have this lovely little bar fly, you wouldn't get as much money!"  Emily gently grabbed Shane's face, slightly pushing on his cheeks, giving his unamused look a level of funny that should be illegal.  They're just too damn cute, it's nice to see the older bachelors and bachelorettes finding love.  Like these two, and Elliott and Leah.  

It gives me hope in case Leo and I fuck it up, though I doubt we will.  I should go visit him.  

We spent the rest of the night like this, with small breaks of me getting drinks for others, so they could have a bit of alone time.  

Lovebirds.  You love to see it, but it's fucking disgusting. 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

And the next morning, I have fucking counseling.  We have counseling.  Great.  Just great.  

It's not like I hate it, it's just tiring.  I'm glad we've been going, I really am!  It's helped a lot, it turns out that to solve problems, we need someone that's willing to speak their mind.  And that turns out to be Dr. Janney, someone who will tell Kent to shut up with no fucks given.  

We've fallen into a routine, first simply getting ready for the day.  I'm normally the last one up, because I get home at the latest 3 a.m.  I'm pretty sure us saloon workers are some of the town members that stay up the latest.  Sam will come and wake me up, like clockwork.  

"Hey, Vince, it's time loser.  Get up."  He roughly nudged me, always getting some sort of groan thrown his way.  "Vincent, if you don't get up, I'm getting the electric kazoo out."  

"Fuck, okay, I'm up!  DON'T!"  

I jumped out of bed and put clean clothes on once he left.  I just sleep in my stuff from the night before, because half of the time I pass out in the living room.  More frequently, because I'm not trying to avoid Kent as much.  I never really question how I get into my room on those nights, maybe I'll ask today.  During counseling, we all have to be honest.  And it's the best place to "build our trust in each other," or the bullshit that Dr. Janney says.  

Because we live so far from town, we don't bother making breakfast.  Kent always has his morning paper and coffee though.  It's about the only thing he consumes in the mornings, even if Dr. Harvey says caffeine isn't the best for a borderline paranoia-driven ex-soldier.  One thing we can agree on, we never listen to doctors, unless we can actually be held accountable.  

In the mornings, I normally have to take cold showers, because Sam uses up all the hot water, and I have to get in right after.  But the mirrors don't have their usual fog, so I assume he hasn't gotten to it yet.  That's right bitch, YOU'RE getting the cold water today!  

Soon enough, we all were ready and made our way to the car.  Most people in town don't have a place to keep our cars, so we have to walk out of town to get to them.  Essentially, everyone but Sebastian's family keep their vehicles not in town.  It's normally a quiet walk, because I have Sam's headphones in, listening to something like AC/DC or Beastie Boys, which is always cranked as loud as my shitty little cracked-ass phone will let me.  Well, not quite quiet, but no one talks to me.  So I'm fine.  

Kent and Mom have started holding hands while walking.  It's not like I care about that detail, it's just something that I noticed.  And Sam doesn't feel like he has to stand between the two, instead standing next to me.  We didn't start too long ago, but it's been a major help to our family.  Sure, some people think it's taboo, but it's fucking HELPFUL!  

Mom has the same car she had from her high school years.  So, pretty old, but not really used much, so it's still a rather nice car.  Vintage, and well-maintained, because often if we're grounded, we have to go deep-clean the car.  

I sit behind Mom, the driver, and Sam sits on the other side of the car, behind Kent.  The car ride is never really bad, because the fields look nice and I have my music.  Sam normally writes stuff in the car, like his sheet music, because he's trying to pick up singing again.  After he healed from the broken jaw a few years back, he's taken it easier than he would, but is getting back into it almost fully.  

And we always stop for breakfast on the way.  We always take it to go, but it's always a little bit of fun before we go to the counselor.  Mom has our orders memorized, and we're creatures of habit, so it works for all of us.  The people there have started memorizing us as well, names to faces and knowing who to pass what drink to.  Mom gets a caramel mocha, Kent gets another black coffee, Sammy gets hot chocolate, and I get a smoothie.  Normally pineapple mango, but if they're out of either, a berry blend.  For actual breakfast, Mom gets a pastry of some sort, Kent doesn't really eat, and Sam and I split a breakfast sandwich, because they're massive and I can't eat a full one, though I'm working up the ability to eat a full one.  Someday, maybe.  

The counselor's office isn't too far from the café.  We normally end up finishing breakfast in the car, and then head in.  A silence always befalls us in the parking lot, and the lobby is no different.  Sometimes Sam and I talk to the people our age that are there, which is the same two girls each and every time.  We've swapped digits and all that, and we're planning to actually hang out and get to know each other.  I know Leo can befriend just about anyone, and Jas would vibe with Enecye and Vivian, so I'm planning on getting them in on it too.  It's nice to have connections outside of Pelican Town if I decide to leave.  

The actual office is a place I feel uncomfortable in, but sitting next to Sammy and knowing Mom is right there is always something that makes it alright.  

Our discussions generally start as soon as we get in, one person calling dibs on throwing out the first question.  This week, Sam got to it first, so I waited my turn to ask my question.  

After a small conversation about his smoking habits, and him admitting it helps a lot with his almost-constant joint aches in his jaw, I got to ask my question.  Well, here it goes…  

"A lot of the time, when Gus keeps me for a long time, or I'm just super tired after a shift, I'll wake up in my bed.  Which one of you's been carrying me to bed?  Unless it's just some magic shit.  I doubt that though."  

I expected it to be Mom, but she shook her head, so I looked at Sam.  He shrugged, which made me wonder.  When I was younger, they would carry me to bed, so I thought it would be one of them.  Sam would just throw me over his shoulder, while Mom actually picked me up.  She's really strong, always has been and will be, and Sam's not too bad. 

That only leaves one person…  "Kent?"  

He wouldn't look at me.  Not at all.  He found the floor to be a very intriguing sight, which is funny, because it's a plain, brown hardwood floor, with a red carpet on top of it.  He sighed before explaining, "It was me, yes.  It is me.  Even though we all can pick you up, because you're still ridiculously light, I'm the one that carries you to bed.  And on busy Friday nights when you wind up with a migraine the morning after, I'm the one that writes those notes.  I sign as your mom so you actually take the damn Tylenol, and actually eat something.  Jodi's handwriting is chicken scratch, I've always had the neater writing.  I know I'm shit at showing it, but I really do care for you all.  I truly do care about you, Vincent.  And I try to show it in the ways that I can, even if you don't know it."   

"Oh…  Well, thanks Kent."  

What, am I supposed to call him dad?  It'll be a long time until I call him that .  Things take time, and that may take the most of all.

Chapter Text

Leo's POV

---

Today, I'm talking to Dr. Harvey.  We kind of have a routine, I swing by on a day he doesn't have patients and he listens to me talk.  He's learned, it's best to just listen.  

"Hello Doctor man!"  I always announce my presence in a ridiculous way, in case he's in a back room, or with someone.  It gives everyone a nice laugh, and helps me know if it's a good time.  

I heard his familiar voice yell out, "Check-up room!"  He'll just tell me where he is, it's easier for everyone that way.  

I walked in and sat down, prepared to not waste any time.  "So, I think I'm getting better."  

"You do?"  

"Mhm!"

"Well kiddo, that's good to hear.  What made you realize?"  

"Well…  A few days ago, I was up with Maru in my tree and realized I couldn't really picture myself jumping down.  And putting ink to paper seems to help me get those thoughts out, the ones you said were intrusive, so they aren't trapped in my head.  And, I went to the island on that day it rained, and I didn't even think of getting hurt or dying once!  Also, Vincent's really been helping.  Distractions are amazing when it comes to thoughts, because they just disappear after a while!  And when they resurface, I know I can always go hang out with someone.  Maru's been willing to give me a little lesson on whatever experiment they're working on, which is also a good distraction.  And Marlon at work has refused to let me use any more weapons, which really sucks, but I know it's been helping, not having a sword in my hand that could easily slide into my throat.  Oh oh, Jas will just show up to my house sometimes when I haven't left in a bit, so that's nice.  And even Shane's been a help, giving me the advice his therapist has given him.  I don't think I'll need…  Well, get therapy, which I really don't want to get anyways."  

"....  Do you ever take a breath when you speak?"  

"Nope!"  My legs swung as I awaited a response, but he just blinked a few times at me, not moving from his spot.  

Well, until he did.   He sat down next to me, setting a hand on my shoulder as he said, "I'm proud of you.  The thoughts sometimes never fully go away, but I'm simply astounded by your progress so far.  You're doing good for it only being about a month.  I'm very proud."  

We were essentially eye to eye, he's only two inches taller than me.  I am kinda tall compared to my friends, and most of the young people in town.  I'm even taller than Sam by an inch!  

After squawking a little, all I said was, "Thank you Dr. Harvey."  I am tired.  "Mmm, I think I'm going to leave."  

We both got up, and he only asked one question before I left.  "Is this better than bottling things up?"  

Better?  

" Much better." 

Chapter Text

Vincent's POV

---

"Leo, stop trying to kiss me, we're trying to plan this out."  

"Sorry, I just wanna kiss you!"  

Damn, he's cute.  But no, we have a fucking birthday to plan!  And yes, it was our idea, but it doesn't mean I have to be happy about it.  Jas' 17th birthday is coming up, and we wanna make it a little special.  Nothing will top last year, but we can still have fun!

It's Summer 3rd, 9:10 p.m.  Tomorrow is her birthday.  So, of course, we're planning it at the last second and hoping it will be good.  If that isn't the way you do anything, don't fucking speak to me.  I am…  Notorious for procrastination.  

Our plan is simple, but it seems like it'll be good!  And that's how it is with us.  Effort is a more foreign concept with us dumbasses.  

First, surprise her with our plan.  Probably just show up in her kitchen, the works.  Normally, we just waltz into her room and wake her up, but the kitchen seems like the right choice this time.  Just, like, sit at the table and wait for her to pull up.  We know she'll end up in the kitchen.  

After she wakes up, breakfast.  Duh.  Jas can't function without some food in her system, and I'm getting into the routine of eating at least two meals a day.  Leo's a different story, but we're gonna eat as a team, because we're just like that.  Built different.  

Next, we're going to drag her away from her chores and bring her over to my house.  We have a super-sized bag of sour slimes and a pack of her favorite cherry energy drinks, from the city, waiting in my room.  Those are our gifts, and of course Mom always has some trick up her sleeve.  She always does!  Jas is essentially part of the family.  And Leo is too, whether they like it or not.  

Then, lunch at the saloon.  I already checked with Gus, he said the plan is great, and Emily decided to pitch in and come back for the day.  

Finally, we're fucking looking at the CLOUDS.  Yes, this is a scheduled thing that we do.  On the beach.  And she'll probably go visit Elliott while we're there.  Which the funky-ass writer man isn't really too bad, so that's fine.  

"Vincennnnnnnnnnnnnnt!"  

"What dude?"

"...  Can I kiss you now?"  

Hm, tempting!  Unfortunately, "Shut the fuck up."  

"I will cry if you don't take that back.  Don't test me!"  

"Okay."  I choose violence.  That seems to be a common theme with us three.  

Wait fuck he's crying.

Well, I have to comfort him.  And I love him, so I'll gladly do it, even if it's self-induced.   And fun fact, he can't stop after he starts.  He knows this, and will use it to his advantage.  It's such a weird skill.  

After an hour of cuddling and laughing at his uncontrollable tears, we went over the plan.  It seems really good, even if it's about 11 p.m. as we finalize it.  Well, in a few hours we'll get our confirmation.  

"Sounds perfect, Vince."  He laughed as he winced, because he rubbed the skin around his eyes raw and is still touching it.  Dumbass.  I love him though.

Chapter Text

Shane's POV

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It's a day, just like any other.  I'm still too used to waking up early from my time at JojaMart, even if that shitfest closed down years ago.  Get up, contemplate laying back down for five minutes, and fully get out of bed.  Today is a little more special than most days, though.  Today is Jas' birthday!  

I never celebrated my birthday as a kid, so I try to put in the extra effort for hers.  She deserves everything, and I can't give it to her, but I can try my damndest to.  I only started celebrating when I'd party with the gridball team, being that one long-haired plug and a varsity quarterback by senior year.  It's easy to see which side of me won out in the end.  

After about an hour, I went into the kitchen, to find…  

"'Sup Shane?"  

God fucking damnnit it's these kids.  Now, I don't hate them, it's just…  It's really fucking weird to see your bartender and his boyfriend in your home for no reason.  

So of course I asked, "Why in the hell are you in my home?"  

My answer was a disapproving glare and a, "Shane, this is my home, and you will not talk to my guests that way!  Now take a seat, breakfast is almost done," from Marnie.  Well, at least I asked.  

Standard breakfast was served, eggs, bacon, and some form of fruit.  Today, mango, which I can tell Leo is going insane over, mentally.  Marnie always cooks more than enough for the three of us, so Vincent and Leo were given plates as well.  

Us three guys were seated at the table, Marnie opting to not be around us.  Good idea on her part, actually.  We're a bit insufferable at times.  

No clue what to say to these kids, so I focused on eating.  Vincent prodded his food a few times, before Leo gave him a rather pointed look, not stopping until he took a bite.  I'm glad Emily isn't here, because she would make so many comments about them.  Not in a bad way, because she thinks it's great that young people are enjoying the thrills and bullshit of relationships, but in an embarrassing way.  For everyone involved.   

Since I didn't know what to say, I just picked up my failed topic from earlier.  If I can't get my answer one way, I'll just try once more before giving up.  "Why are you two in my house?"  

"It's Jas' birthday today, did you forget?"  

WOW.  Woooooooooow okay I see how it is.  Okay, "Fuck you too buddy.  Actually, I'm letting her sleep in a little because it is."  He really asked if I forgot my pride and joy's birthday, huh.  Fuck off kid.  

And no, I'm not above telling a kid to fuck off or dropkicking one, thanks for asking.  

Leo gave me a rather worried look.  Why is he worried all of the sudden?  

"You really let Jasmine, "If I don't wake up at a certain time every day I might die," THAT Jas sleep in?"  

"Eh, she's gotten better about it."  

As if to prove my point, the creaky hinges of a bedroom door filled the air, and out came Jas.  "Well lookie here, it's the woman of the hour!"  

"No, of the whole day.  Get it right, old man."  

She's always been a bit sassy, kind of reminds me of her mother.  She'd be so proud if she could see Jas today.  

"Happy 17th, sunshine."  She grabbed a plate and joined us at the table, standing in between the island boy and his lovebird.  She didn't even verbally respond, just dipping her head in thanks.  

Leo put a casual arm around her and said out-of-the-blue, "If you had plans today, no you didn't."  

She looked at him with mild confusion as Vincent explained, "Because we made the plans for you.  And no, you're not getting out of them."  Well, I guess today I'll just deal with the chickens alone.  Charlie might be a little disappointed, but oh well.  It's her birthday, so she needs to go have fun!  And not the type I had at her age.  

Jas responded the exact same way I thought she would.  "But what about the chickens??"  

Vincent just motioned to me.  Well, he's not wrong .  

"Finish up breakfast, and then we're heading out.  We got shit to DO!"  

"Hey, la-"

"Shut up."  

I looked at Vincent, staring dead into his eyes.  Jas' dad would do this all the time to me, which freaked me out, and by the look on his face, freaks him the fuck out too.  "She's going to be home before six."  

"Hm, no I won't," Jas responded for him with a smile.  

“You three are dumbfucks.  All of you."  

All three of them nodded their heads in agreement, so I guess I wasn't that far off.  Huh. 

Chapter Text

Jas' POV

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After eating breakfast, the boys started to drag me along to enact their little mystery plan.  See, I'm more often than not the one with plans out of us three, as Vincent procrastinates like there's endless tomorrows, and Leo is just a bit too scatter-brained to hold himself to a plan.  

I've been loosening up and going with the flow more and more, waking up whenever I wake up and not planning out my day meticulously.  So for once, letting someone else take the reins is probably for the better.  

"Jas, you're going to fully enjoy the day, and I know it.  We have an entire plan laid out, and we're going to disobey Shane's rules.  Today is going to rule!  I'm sure you'll like what we have planned out.  Aaaand, you'll never believe how long it took to plot out the day.  You'll love it!"  We made short work of walking to our first stop while Leo rambled a little, but neither of us stopped him.  We won't ever try to, because it's futile.  He probably picked it up from Maru.  

Vincent's house.  A place that's way too familiar to me.  I'm over often, just hanging out with Vincent and his family.  A little more now that they're working on their issues, and not constantly at each other's throats.  Opening the door, everything seemed way too normal.  Kent sipping on coffee in the living room, Jodi in the kitchen, and Sam off in his room.  

"Happy birthday dear!"  Jodi's voice, loud and clear, rang out from the kitchen as she turned away from the sink.  She walked over and gave me a little hug, the smell of soap and a slow-cooked dinner following, like a spirit.  Considering I lost my parents at a young age, any adult that acts nice to me is always kindly regarded.  

The hello was short-lived, because Vincent dragged me off to his bedroom.  And before anyone says anything, not in that way.  He's literally dating Leo!

Two gifts, addressed to me, sat on the small table that replaced his toy chest.  And they're good gifts!  Great, even!  These two know me really well, and they know that this means a lot to me.  I'm really glad these two know my preferences when it comes to simple gifts like these.  

The doorknob's familiar click had us three staring towards the door, which followed with Sam saying, "Hey loser, stupid, and gay-wad, kitchen.  Now, come on!!"  Sam's never been mean, but he does affectionately insult us, with specific nicknames.  

And there we were, in the kitchen.  A pink cake with a few candles sat on the table, one for each of the six slices, plus an extra one.  7 candles.  Sam started playing the little happy birthday song on his guitar.  Better than sitting through people singing it off-key.  A lot better.  

Blowing out the candles, I made a simple wish - but why would I tell you?  Wishes are still supposed to be secret.  That hasn't changed over the course of one year, even if a lot has.  

The cake was good, just as good as last year.  Not as extravagant, but that's part of what makes it so good.  Vincent and Jodi most likely baked it together, as that's an activity they enjoy doing.  Bonding with your mom - wish I could relate.  

And just like that, after us three finished our slices, we were on to our next stop, the saloon.  Vincent is to thank - or blame - for this.  I know it, I just know it.  Because he works here, no shit Jasmine!

We went in, the place unoccupied, aside from Emily at the front.  She's been a regular visitor at the ranch in recent seasons, so her presence isn't all too uncommon.  "I'll show you three to the room," she said with a smile as she motioned for us to follow her.  Vincent took the lead, with Leo in tow of both of us.  

A little lunch was set up, no doubt cooked up by Gus.  He's been teaching Vincent a lot of the tricks and tips he uses, so I've tasted quite a bit of it when we hang out and no one else is up.  

And it was really good.  Soy sauce-marinated steaks with spicy coleslaw and roasted chickpeas.  Just looking at the food made my mouth water, and even Vincent didn't hesitate to start eating.  

We talked as we ate, somehow going from talking about the food to time as a concept, then to the passage of it.  I am known for talking about these things, and getting emotional about it.  

Leo put that conversation on halt though.  "Jas, you're gonna become sentimental and sappy and stuff if we keep talking about it."  Not wrong, but ouch.  

After we had finished our food, and a bit of Leo and Vince making a mess by trying to land roasted chickpeas in each other's mouths, the classic throw-it-in-the-air-and-see-who-catches-it method, we set off again.  Vincent is so getting chewed out when he clocks in later.  And I will be sure to be here, because it will be a fantastic way to end the day.  

I didn't even freak out about leaving a mess!  While I do feel bad, it will get cleaned by the one who made it.  

Next destination: the beach.  Maybe I'll return that copy of the book Elliott gave me after the entire year.  It's annotated, jam-packed with little notes and everything my brain thought up while reading, in purple and green ink, with yellow highlighting.  Essentially perfectly color-coded, as all things should be.  

Leo laid out a sheet, and he laid down immediately.  "Get down here, you two!!"  And so we did as he asked.  I laid down next to him, Vincent laid down beside me.  Their heads pointed towards the entrance of the beach, while mine was the opposite.  Towards the sea and the waves.  

We silently looked up at the sky, and the clouds with it.  Various shapes passed us by.  The one I noticed first was a white butterfly.  Well, white because of the clouds, but still a white butterfly.  In many different beliefs, white butterflies symbolize fortune and rebirth.  A hopeful sight with a year before 18.  

Where does the time go?  I remember just turning 16, but now it's a year until I become a literal adult.  What the fuck?

"Guys.  What the hell."  

Leo, with his button-up dad shirts and cargo shorts, normally in some variant of the outfit, asked, "Yeah Blue Jazz?"  I am 99% sure he got all his clothes from Demetrius, before the science man had to wear practical clothes for his job.  They're probably given to him by Robin, along with her old sweaters and Sebastian's old sweatpants for winter.  

The smooth sheet, undoubtedly taken from Jodi's spare bedding closet, was nice against my skin.  A lot of it is exposed, because I'm wearing a colorful, abstract-patterned romper, with hair bows to match, and black leather sandals.  "It's been a whole year.  Literally, an entire year."  

"And what about it?"  Vincent shifted a little next to me, kicking his shoes off into the sand.  He's wearing his raggedy sneakers - well, was - with ripped hand-me-down jeans and a basic t-shirt.  That seems to be his go-to outfit, and has multiple variations of it.  The same outfit, different pieces, over and over.  That hasn't changed much, though the clothes aren't as baggy on him as they've been before.  

"Well…  Think about how much we've changed!  Like, our New Year's resolutions, we've worked on a lot since then, and even before that too!  Just a year ago, I was freaking out over a tiny stain!  But now, I let you both leave a mess in that room back at the Stardrop.  Sure, it's not gone , but I'm really learning to loosen up."  

"Yeah.  My brain has really settled down and I've been thinking a lot less about death, and dying, and pain and stuff.  I don't even know why I thought so much about it before, but here I am, not really thinking all too much about it.  I still have a long way to go, but hey, I'm getting there."  

"His name is Apollo."  

Leo and I immediately looked at Vincent, a little confused.  Although that was short-lived because he explained, "My New Year's resolution was to find out what Dr. Harvey's first name is.  He has everyone call him Harvey, but it's his last name.  DOCTOR Harvey.  Actually,  his last name is derived from Hadriana, which is Roman, which makes sense because I did some digging and found out he and his siblings are all named after Roman gods and goddesses.  In order of oldest to youngest, Ceres, Minerva, Apollo, Selene, and Proserpina.  Apparently, their grandparents chan-"

"Vincent!  This isn't what we're talking about!"  

He groaned, excited to talk about Dr. Harvey's past, or happy to avoid a serious topic.  More likely the latter.  But that's not what we want to hear.  "Fine, my eating habits have gotten better because of the help of my support system.  I'm not fully better, but I'm getting to a point where eating is mostly more than manageable.  And my family's issues are being helped with therapy.  Are you happy?"  

We settled back down, giving him his response.  And for a while, we just stared at the clouds.  More shapes, more clouds, passing by like the years do.  

After a bit, Vincent adjusted his leg, crossing one over the other and accidentally kicking me.  "Shit, sorry Jas, my leg just hurts.  Like a growing pain, but it's because I haven't been sitting or laying like this much, y'know?  On my feet constantly, because of work."  

I do know.  And there's something else I know, that I've realized.  

"Y'know, I think adults call them growing pains, because they know it hurts."