Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

          There were bad ideas, and then, there were horrible ideas. A bad idea, would be drinking orange juice after brushing your teeth, or maybe having one too many drinks on a work night. Not cleaning up after your dog while on a walk. Little things, with little, mostly harmless repercussions.

          A horrible idea is what Sasha had. A horrible idea, that, at sixteen years old, caused her to go to a high school party when invited by the asshole quarterback she didn’t even like. She didn’t make a whole lot of friends at school and she thought maybe she could get a little attention this way.

Caused her to attend a party without telling anyone where she was going, how long she'd be there, or how to get a hold of her. Even her closest friend, Nancy, was completely unaware of her plans for this evening. She didn’t even have to sneak out. Her worthless parents didn’t care or even notice if she was home or not.

Caused her to wear a much too short skirt that exposed almost the entirety of her thighs, and a tight purple crop top that exposed her flat belly and hugged the curves of her chest. She looked older when dressed like this. She liked it. It felt mature.

          Sasha had always been very pretty but otherwise an average C student who didn't do much for extra curricular activities. Parents didn’t care enough to drive her to or from, let alone actually fund that sort of thing. It was a shame, really. She really wanted to join the Drama club. She thought she would make a hell of an actress if given a chance.

 The only classes she really excelled in were English. She did like writing and she was good at it. Everything else was only satisfactory. Other classes were boring, especially math. Surely most of this bullshit wouldn’t be relevant after high school.

         Her raven hair was tied up in a neat, high ponytail and she'd gone all out with her makeup. Iris eyeshadow with silver sparkles and a matte black lipstick. True to form, she looked much older than she was, and was hoping this party would be a good way to kick off her summer vacation. School would be out in just a couple more weeks and she wouldn’t have to worry about all this shit for another year. Nope, for the next three months, her only concern would be a part time job so she could take care of herself for the summer without being able to rely on school for two meals a day.

         She had never been more wrong in her whole life. One of her heels broke when she had hurried down the steps and out of the house where the party had been. They were in her shoes now, the plastic straps between her fingers as she continued to run.

 She couldn't run with them on, and she'd been running for a while, longer than she could comprehend with the panic in her heart. She'd been trying to outrun the football team, more or less. It was almost all of them, if not all of them. They'd started touching her thighs and stomach. Tried making passes kissing her. She'd asked them to stop politely at first, but they wouldn't. After they continued to push the subject, the stench of booze on their breath, she punched one. He wiped the blood from his mouth before swiftly ripping her shirt open in response to her defiance, exposing her pastel blue bra beneath.

She could hear them behind her hooting and shouting, only a block or so back. She whimpered between heavy breaths, tears streaming down her face as she ducked into a dark alley and hoped for the best. Praying that they didn’t see her make the turn. Praying she could find somewhere good to hide until they gave up. She knelt down beside a large blue dumpster and tried to hold her breath, her whole body shaking from the fear and the effort. Maybe she would get lucky and they would be too drunk to find her, though that seemed very unlikely.

         "Ah, there you are." A strong voice said as it rounded the dumpster toward her. She stood up and made to run again, but she was grabbed by too many hands to count. She screamed until her throat burned, echoing through the empty alley, drowning out the sounds of the boys around her, but only for a moment.

          "Someone help me! Someone! Please!" She cried out frantically, desperate for anyone to help her out of this mess she found herself in. She couldn’t see anything except for the boys around her as they dragged her from beside the dumpster and into the open alley.

          "Hold her down, damn it. I don't want her running away!" One of the boys barked loudly, fiddling with his pants to pull out his throbbing cock, "I can't wait to finally be inside of this fucking tease."

          They forced her down onto the ground on her stomach. At least three of them were holding her down. One on each arm, and she couldn't tell if it was one or two on her legs. She felt knees against her calves, pushing them apart and a hand flipped her skirt up over her hips. She could feel the evening air against the newly exposed flesh.

She could feel the tip of his cock brushing against her bare ass cheeks and tears continued to roll down her face. Her cheek was pressed against the rough, disgusting pavement and reality of being brutally gang raped hit her. Then… much faster than it had started, it ended.

One by one, hands were being removed from her painlessly. There was only an eerie silence and a faint breeze. She weakly propped herself up with her trembling arms and managed to turn herself over to a sitting position. The pavement was cold and damp against her wet, exposed cheeks.

They were all gone. Every one of them was gone without a trace. No shoes or clothes as if they’d been raptured or something. Nothing at all, like they had disintegrated completely. How was that even possible? She didn’t know and she didn’t care. All she wanted was to get the fuck out of here and home before anything else had time to go wrong. She got up on her knees and took a shaky breath. She looked down at her dirty hands and struggled to flip her skirt back down over her thighs. The skirt was dirty now and her shirt was barely more than a scrap of fabric. Everything hurts. Lungs on fire. Legs throbbing. All she wanted was to get home.

          "Are you hurt, miss?" A strong, and very familiar voice called to her. She looked up and a smile crossed her makeup stained face. She felt relief wash over her. She'd never been so grateful to see a familiar face. He was always beautiful, but now more so than ever. Never had she thought that she would get the privilege of meeting him in person. To be saved by the God himself. She would recognize that smile, that blonde hair, and those good looks anywhere. His patriotic suit was gorgeous and shimmering, even in the low light of the street lamps that only barely reached him.

Homelander

           "I'm… I'll be alright, Homelander. Thank you so much for saving me." She managed, still smiling even though it hurt her throat to speak, "I'm afraid of what they would have actually done to me if you hadn't shown up. I'm okay, but only because you saved me. I am… S-so grateful." The gratitude was clear in her hoarse voice. Despite the circumstances, this felt surreal, like a nightmare turned into a dream. The man she had always looked up to, stared at in awe when he was on the TV; standing before her in all his glory. She felt as if she were basking in the glow of him. The warmth and security that she felt having him so close made her heart flutter.

          "Only doing my duty, miss." Homelander responded with that charming smile. He stepped closer to her without a sound and reached down, gripping her chin gently in his gloved hand to tilt her head up toward him. He studied her face for a moment before smiling again, 'My, My, aren't you a beautiful sight. No wonder they wanted you so bad. I'm starting to think that maybe they had the right idea." He clicked his tongue as his eyes scanned her.

She was a pretty girl, despite all of that god awful whore make-up on her face. That wouldn’t be enough to stop him. Just meant he wouldn’t have to worry about her crying. The make-up was already ruined. Wouldn’t be his fault.

          "Wh… What…?" She murmured quietly, trying to process everything he just said. Nothing felt real, but that was uncomfortable regardless. He called her beautiful? Right idea? She snapped back to reality when his hand left her chin and rested on his cock through his spandex suit. Her eyes drifted down toward his hand in mute horror. Her heart shattered at that moment. Her hero. Her god… He was just like the rest of them. What briefly felt like a dream was turning back into a nightmare.

          "I've got a deal for you. You open that pretty mouth of yours for me and show me what you can do. If you're good enough, that'll be all I ask for." He offered with a playful smile, his hand still resting on his cock. She was already on her knees, she was already halfway there.

          "I really…" She hiccuped woefully, "I really don't want to, Mister Homelander. I really appreciate you saving me-" She tried to explain, the tears stinging at her eyes again. No, no, god, no. Don’t let this happen. Don’t let the night end like this. Not Homelander. Not fucking Homelander. 

          "Shut the fuck up." He chuckled before his charming smile faded and his face turned to stone. The look on his face struck fear into her core. "I didn't ask what you wanted, now, did I?" He growled, opening his suit and pulling out his throbbing cock without further warning. One hand held his shaft, and the other grabbed her ponytail, yanking her head closer. Her knees scraped against the pavement and began to sting. She didn’t know if they were bleeding but she assumed they were. "I really don't think you want to defy me. Super strength. Laser eyes. Flight. Do you have any idea what I could fucking do to you if you fight me? Crush your skull with my bare hands. Drop you from the top of a building. Melt your face. Just to name a few."

          She didn't answer him this time, only began pitifully sobbing. Tears streamed down her cheeks, dragging her mascara with them and leaving black stains. She placed her hands on his thighs and slowly parted her trembling lips. He didn't give her any time, tightening his grip on her hair and thrusting his cock into her mouth and down her throat until her lips hit the base of his cock. Her eyes went wide and she gagged around him. Her hands pressed against his thighs, but it didn’t matter. It was like pushing on a wall. No give at all. She couldn't breathe. Her wide green eyes just stared up at him, looking at the expression on his face. It was pleasure, pleasure and sick enjoyment for her suffering.

She had always heard rumors that Superheroes weren’t as good as Vaught made them seem. She always shrugged them off as conspiracy theorists and whack jobs. Now… Now she wasn’t so sure. If Homelander could be like this, what was stopping the rest of them? Clearly, it wasn’t Homelander keeping them in line. Not in the slightest.

          "Awe… That’s so cute. You think you're going to be able to push hard enough to pull me out of your throat. Stop pushing, and maybe I'll let you breathe." He moaned the words, his eyes never leaving her face. God, she was so fucking pathetic, those black lips wrapped around his shaft. Her throat felt like hot velvet and the sensation was exquisite. She gagged again and forced her arms to go limp, falling down at her sides. She was starting to see spots. Right when she was about to pass out, he pulled her mouth off of his cock. She gasped loudly, never being more grateful to be able to feel oxygen. The air filled her burning lungs and soothed them like aloe. Drool connected her bottom lip to the tip of his cock. She stared at it for a moment before slowly lifting her eyes to look up at him, praying he wasn’t making that sinister face anymore.

          "I think black is a good shade for me, don’t you?" He remarked, tracing a finger across the black lipstick mark she'd left on his flesh, leaving a black mark on his glove. "I think we should add more."

          "Y… yes sir…" Sasha whispered, opening her mouth again. Hopefully, if she continued to listen to him and do what he asked, he wouldn’t kill her. Sure, she was terrified of being raped by the football team, but Homelander was more likely to actually kill her.

This pleased Homelander. She was so easily broken and her compliance was delectable. He thrust back into her mouth, but not as deep this time. No, there was no need for that show of power now that she was obeying. She didn't gag and did her best to actually suck, and move her tongue. If she was going to have to do this, she wanted to do it well enough that he would let her go home largely unscathed. It was more of a blowjob than the skullfuck it had started as originally. She could feel him getting harder and harder. She hoped he was almost done. That he would cum down her throat and it would all be finished. Wait, was his cum, super strong, too? Was it going to blow a hole right through her? This thought started and ended as quickly as it began. He pulled out of her mouth and she prepared for cum to splatter her face or shoot through her like a bullet, but it didn't.

          He grabbed her arms gently and brought her to her feet. Was that it? Was he done? He didn't want to climax with her? That last part made sense, in her fangirl brain. This man was a god. Of course he didn't want to meddle too much in the lives of normal people. While her mind was racing, she didn't realize what he had been doing, not until her thighs were resting on his hips. He held her as if she weighed nothing, one hand firmly on her ass, and one on her back. She felt the slick tip against her exposed pussy lips. The color drained from her face as she looked at him and her hands moved to rest on his shoulders.

          "W… wait…" She gasped slightly, looking at him as he held her. She didn't struggle or try to get away. She knew better than to test his threats or his patience. All he'd have to do is smash her head in against any object back here, or he could punch clean through her, ending her life.

Pushing these thoughts away, she stuck four fingers in her mouth, making herself gag in the process. This coated them in saliva so she could reach down and lubricate herself as best she could, given the situation. To her surprise, he only watched her with a mild amusement on his handsome face. She never wanted to hit anyone so badly in her life. She was surprised he didn't get impatient and just forced himself inside first. He wasn’t going to stop and she knew that. She wanted to at least make it bearable and keep the damage to her body to a minimum.

Despite the discomfort of her situation, he was so strong and so warm. He felt like the warmth of a fire against her exposed skin. The stark contrast between the night time air and his body heat was causing goosebumps across her arms and legs.

          "Well, look who had a change of heart. Decided to be an active participant instead of a victim I see." He mused playfully, leaning forward and placing an oddly gentle kiss on her neck, "I hope you're ready. I really wasn't going to do this, but you just looked so beautiful… pathetic… and helpless with my cock in your mouth, I wanted to know what you'd look like…" He paused and slowly began pushing himself inside of her. His cock spread her hot, tight cunt as it went inside. She gasped and let out a weak scream followed by whimpers, the tears starting down her face again, "... When I put my cock inside of you." He moaned. Her hot pussy gripped him like a vice and he couldn't hide the pleasure he was feeling. He didn't thrust into her, for fear of actually irreversibly damaging her insides. He wanted to have his fun, but she was precious. Far too precious to actually injure. Oh, the way he wanted to take her back to the tower and lock her in like Rapunzel. Rather, he used his hands to bounce her lightly on his throbbing cock, moaning as he watched her tear stained face. She was so fearfully compliant, of course she was. A man she had seen as a god before tonight was raping her in a filthy alley. Of course she was compliant.

          He leaned forward and touched his lips to hers, moaning against her lips and savoring the feeling of whimpers. The way they vibrated so deliciously against his lips. He could feel himself getting closer and closer to his orgasm. It was intense and mind blurring. He didn't know the last time cumming felt even half this good. This would be an actual orgasm, not just getting off.

         "Is there anything you'd like to say to me, sweetheart?" He moaned, not slowing his place, but pulling back far enough to get a good look at her face again. There she was. The tears and his cock and removed most of that horrible makeup and he could see the girl beneath. Such a pretty little face.

          "Thank you for saving me…" She whimpered between her soft sobs. There were so many more vicious and vulgar things she wanted to say, but she was in no position to say them. As soon as she thanked him, she felt him cum inside of her. Hot and thick, filling her up completely. The moan that left him was completely feral, his hands gripping her more tightly. She knew she would have bruises from his hands. The grip caused her to cry out again in pain, her hands gripping his shoulders with white knuckles as she tried to endure him.

          "You really are well behaved." He moaned again, pulling her off of him. He set her down on her feet and cleaned himself up first, adjusting his costume before he turned to her. 

To her great surprise, he pushed her skirt down to cover her thighs. Cum dripped from between them in a slow trickle as it escaped her pussy. He removed his cape to clean up her face, removing all of the tear stains and what was left of her lipstick. A smirk crossed his lips then and he wrapped the cape around her like a protective blanket. He scooped her into his arms bridal style and slowly lifted off, floating just a few feet above the ground. He didn't want to jostle her too terribly. She was just a normal, weak human. Of course she was going to be exhausted and weak from what he had just put her through. He didn’t expect her to walk, nor did he want her to. He wanted to have this time with her, to hold her like this. Show her that he wasn’t just the monster she experienced, but still the god that deserved her worship.

          "I'm taking you home now. I just need to know where you live." He spoke softly. It was frightening to her just how quickly his tone had gone from evil, to that same charming tone she'd grown to know through these years. Her eyes drifted up toward him with momentary worry, but then she realized it didn’t matter. If he wanted to find her again, he would be able to do it whether she gave him her address or not.

          "2665 Oakwood Lane…" She murmured softly against his chest. The warmth of him made things hurt less. She could see her knees and they were scraped up and bleeding, just as she had expected. She was exhausted and everything hurt. She still wasn't sure if she was going to die, but she really hoped he wouldn't hurt her anymore, and that he truly was going to take her home.

          Her wish was granted this time. Within minutes, he was setting her down on her rickety porch with peeling white paint. He made sure she could stand on her own, keeping his hand on her arm to steady her. He looked over her, a small smile crossed his lips.

           "I had a great time with you tonight. I'd definitely like to see you again. Soon, if you will allow it." He said with a sweet smile. He spoke as if he was bringing her home from a date. It made her angry, not that she could show it. He knew full well that she was in no position to try and tell him no.

          "Well, you know where I live." She said softly, "I'm sure you can stop by anytime you see fit…" She answered halfheartedly. She didn’t tell him ‘no’ but it certainly wasn’t an enthusiastic yes either. She would be happy if she never saw his face again as long as she lived, but she knew that was a fantasy. His face was plastered all around this fucking city. Their bullshit symbol of hope and peace. What a fucking joke.

          "That's such a good girl." He said with a sort of delighted sigh. He reached out and gently grabbed her cheeks in his hands, leaning down and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. He felt her tremble beneath his touch and he loved it. He loved how she felt in his hands. This wouldn’t be the last time he saw her. He would make absolutely sure of it.         

           Flash. Flash. Flash. Suddenly it was as if a lightning storm had appeared out of thin air. Blinding flashes all around them. Sasha looked around, moving her head from his hands, thankfully he wasn't holding her very hard this time.

         Oh fuck. Cameras. Paparazzi. Everyone just watched him kiss her. She was wrapped in his cape. She froze and looked up at him, wondering how he was going to handle this situation. He looked furious, but just for a moment. The anger wasn’t directed at her, but that didn’t make it any less frightening.

         "These fucking people…" He growled under his breath before turning around with the biggest smile on that charming face. He held his arms up to wave to each side. "Good evening, citizens! Are you all keeping safe and warm this fine evening? The chill can really get to you, if you're not careful. Just ask my friend here!" He chuckled, motioning toward Sasha still wrapped in  his cape, "She's alright though, and home safe and sound. Which is something I would suggest you all be! Go on home, you guys have done enough work for the night!"

         "Homelander! Homelander!" A woman reporter hurried down the sidewalk toward them. She had tanned skin and brown hair, and was wearing a maroon pantsuit. "We really only have one question, if you'd be so kind."

          "I'm not one to disappoint my fans. Go right ahead." He smiled, though inside he was screaming and melting all of them with lasers.

          "During your career with Vought, no one has ever seen you kiss anyone you weren't in a relationship with, or wasn't for publicity. Who is that girl and what does she mean to you?" She asked, holding the microphone out to him.

         "She…" He paused before continuing. This was it. This was his chance to make this a reality and Vaught wouldn’t be able to stop him. Better to ask forgiveness than permission, as they say. "She and I have sort of been seeing one another for a while now. I've been trying to keep it a secret." He said before calling over his shoulder to Sasha, "I'm sorry sweetheart, seems I've outed our relationship!" He wondered how she would respond, if she would respond at all.

This. This was it. The moment of truth. How would she reply to this? Her heart raced again. He just said this was a relationship? Was he fucking inside? Well, yes, he was, but that wasn’t the biggest problem here. Did she want to try to explain what happened? No, no… He would kill her if she did that. Her heart raced in her chest as she looked between him and the crowd of people with cameras and microphones. This was it. The moment of truth. She wasn’t able to take Drama, but let's see if anyone would believe her as an actress.

          "Oh, gosh darn it, Homelander!" She called back with an almost playful tone, struggling to sound normal with her burning throat, "You said you'd keep the Paparazzi off of me until we made the public announcement!" She called. She didn't know why she was lying for him, maybe because she didn't think anyone would believe the truth… or maybe because she was afraid of how quickly he would kill her if she upset him. That was probably it. She wanted to survive. She wanted to live. Being raped, she could live with that, at least, she thought she could. If it was the football team, maybe not, because she could have fought. Homelander was a god, and she didn't have any way to fight him.

         "I'm sure they won't harass you, Honey." Homelander assured her before slowly looking around at the Paparazzi, "How about I get each of your cards, and once this goes public, we will start scheduling interviews. For now, I'm sure she's tired and would like to go to sleep for the night." He said before turning back and looking at her, winking, "Go on inside, sweetheart. I'll handle all of this."

          "Goodnight, Homelander, thank you!" She called with a smile before opening the door and stepping inside. She locked and dead bolted the door before her lip began to quiver. Tears rolled down her cheeks and loud sobs began to wrack her. She turned around and began up the smooth wooden stairs toward her bedroom. She almost forgot she was wearing his cape, until she almost tripped over it on the stairs. She adjusted it on her shoulders and finally rounded the corner to her room. She shut the door, turned on the light and screamed.

          Before today, she hadn't thought much of it. Her room had been this way for so long that she simply didn't think about it. On every wall, and ceiling, there were posters of Homelander. Photos from tabloids, magazines, interviews, the internet… Her room was a shrine to a man she had, for the last sixteen years, seen as a god among men. A pure, selfless being who existed only to protect and serve his country… now, on every wall, was the man who raped her in an alley. His smile mocking her.

          She removed the cape from her back and lay it across her bed, staring at it in numb disbelief. She went into her connected bathroom and looked in the mirror.

She looked like hell. Worse than hell. He'd wiped away most of her make up, but the shadow on her eyelids was still wet and smudged. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying. Her cheek was scraped up from the pavement. There were bruises on her arms, wrists and shoulders as well as the scrapes on her knees. The shirt she wore was only held up by a couple strained strands of fabric now. She turned around and struggled to see her back. As she expected, there was a perfect bruise in the shape of his hand forming on her back. She couldn't see it, but she assumed there would be one on her ass, too, from where he held her.

          She struggled to remove what was left of her clothing, and step into the standing shower. She tried to wash away the shame and anger, but it only helped so much. Scrubbing her skin until it was red and raw from the effort. She dried off and put on a large T-shirt to sleep in. The less clothing to touch her, the better. Everything hurt and she wanted it all to go away. It was easier to bandage her cheek and her knees with only the shirt on.

God, she hoped she wouldn't be pregnant. After leaving the bathroom, she lay in bed and looked up at the ceiling, trying not to think about how much everything hurt. The poster of Homelanders smiling face stared down at her. It was once so comforting to think he watched over her as she slept… now she feared she'd awake to find him inside of her again.

Chapter Text

          "Sasha!" A woman screamed shortly before pounding began on her bedroom door, causing the posters hung there to saver. "Sasha Lancaster you wake up right this moment!" The voice belonged to her mother, Rachel. Her mother was prone to yelling, but not like this. She sounded frantic and wild. It was a tone she'd never heard from her mother before. Usually she was yelling about baseball or something that she was upset that her husband had done.

        Sasha woke up with a start, nearly screamed when she saw the photo of Homelander above her bed. Awake for less than a second and her heart was already threatening to burst through her ribs. She whimpered, gripping her chest, feeling her heart about to explode from the effort of its panic. She crawled out of her bed, wincing as everything began to hurt and ache again. At least she was able to sleep, though being vertical felt like hell now. She walked to her door and unlocked it, opening it to see the red face of her mother.

          Rachel was a rather attractive woman, though she had her fair share of issues. Most of which revolved around her inability to hold down any job for long. Her hair was black and wavy, though now it was tied back with a binder. Her makeup was done in shades of blue, except for the peachy pink lipstick. Her brown eyes were full of discomfort and unease as she looked at Sasha.

          "Look at you, you're a goddamn mess. Clean up your face. Put makeup on well , and put on some nice clothes. You've got fifteen minutes before I want you down stairs." Rachel demanded firmly, not offering any explanation.

          "Um.. okay. Sure, but why? What's going on? Is everything okay?" Sasha asked, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. She didn’t even know what time it was, but surely it was too early to have company over.

          "Homelander and Madelyn Stillwell are downstairs on our couch asking about you. They've got bodyguards with guns and a lot of paperwork. I don't know what the fuck you did, but you are clearly in some kind of fucking trouble. Just… make your ass presentable and come down stairs." She growled impatiently before disappearing down the stairs.

          "Oh fuck…" Sasha breathed, closing her door and looking around her room. "Shit… shit shit shit!" She cried out softly. She debated jumping out the window to escape, but she'd never make it far. If she didn’t break anything during the fall, Homelander would catch her before she made it a single step. Her best bet was to just… Go along with whatever they want.

          She put on a sunflower pattern sundress and groaned softly as she looked in the mirror. It didn't cover any of her bruises. Instead, she went with a¾ sleeve gray T-shirt, and tight faded blue jeans. She went into the bathroom and brushed through her hair, letting the length of it fall down over her shoulders and mid way down her back. She applied a soft pink lipstick, some lilac eyeshadow, black mascara and just a hint of blush. She stepped back and took a nervous breath. She didn't look bad for taking less than ten minutes to get ready, well, aside from the wide bandage across her left cheek.

She left her room and reached the top of the stairs. Her stomach was in knots. She didn't want to see him. Was he here to apologize? To make them sign a legal gag? To get his cape back? Oh god. Right. The cape. She hurried back to her room and folded the cape, carrying it in her arms back to the stairs. She managed to descend this time, each breath becoming harder and harder to take. Once she hit the base, she turned to the right to see her mother and father sitting at the kitchen table with Homelander and Madelyn Stillwell. She swallowed hard and nervously approached, not sure what all of this was really about.

         "Good morning everyone." Sasha said with a timid smile, holding the folded cape out to Homelander where he sat, "I didn't get a chance to wash it. I didn't expect you to be back for it so soon."

          "Don't you fret about it, sweetheart." Homelander responded with a kind, but dismissive hand, "As far as I'm concerned, that one is for you to keep. I have a closet full. That's not why we are here. Please, have a seat." He said as he pushed his chair back, the legs scraping against the floor. He pulled out a chair for her and motioned for her to sit. She obliged, too afraid to argue. He pushed the chair in for her before sitting down himself. Sasha placed the folded cape on the table and looked at all of the adults around her.

He had called her sweetheart and pulled the chair out for her. He wasn’t bothering to hide anything, was he? What exactly had he told them? Did they know what he did to her? Or just that he said they were in a relationship as of last night? She swallowed hard, not knowing what to expect next.

          "I'm sorry… am I in trouble?" Sasha asked quietly. The way that Homelander stared at her made her think he could hear her heartbeat.

          "Far from it, actually." Madelyn said with a professional smile. She was a middle aged woman that time had not been particularly kind to. She was very business-like and formal. Even the smile was very practiced. "Actually, we are here because Homelander, last night, informed us of your relationship. As you're probably aware, this is something that we like to have some control over, as far as when and how it goes public." She said before looking over at Homelander. It was brief, but that look had turned into a glare, and Sasha wondered why. Did this woman know the truth?

          "What the FUCK did you do!" Madelyn demanded while Homelander was in her office. The large screen on the far wall showed Homelander kissing a young girl on the forehead, while she was wrapped in his cape, "Are you fucking joking? How could you be so careless! You know the rules on relationships, John!" She growled angrily, placing her hands on her hips, "Does she know we have to bury this?"

          "You can't bury it, or her…" John said, looking dreamily up at the screen, more or less ignoring Madelyn’s anger. "It isn't a relationship, not really. I saved her from being raped by a gaggle of jumped up muscle heads in an alley." He explained before swallowing and lowering his gaze slightly, "... Right before I decided they had the right idea, and raped her myself."

          "John…" She sighed in disbelief, falling back into her chair behind her desk, "we've talked about this. You are our symbol of hope. You don't get to be bad. We can't let her go public with that information. That could ruin you."

          "So don't let her." He responded, turning to face her, his arms behind his back, "Let's go public with a relationship. Let her do the interviews and be in the limelight. And if she tries to say anything negative about me, have her involuntarily institutionalized. If we do that, we can-"

         "Say that everything was in her mind. That it wasn't until after you'd been dating for a few months that we realized how mentally unstable she was…" Madelyn added with a small nod of her head, "I think we can work with that."

          "What we would like is for you to come live in the Tower of Seven, with Homelander. Everything will be paid for for you. You won't have anything to worry about ever again. You'll have everything you could ever want." Madelyn said before turning to Sasha's parents, Rachel and Jack, "of course, we wouldn't do this without your permission. We are aware that she is only sixteen. She and Homelander have not yet had a sexual relationship. We know that would be illegal without parental consent. For your inconvenience, and in hopes of your cooperation, we would like to offer you compensation of fifteen thousand dollars per month that your daughter is staying with us. I know money could never replace a child, but I am hoping it may ease your pain."

          "Absolutely. You have our blessing." Jack said with zero hesitation, signing the paperwork without even reading it. Sasha wasn't surprised but it still fucking hurt. Her father had been working three jobs as long as she could remember. Her mother had expensive taste and an inability to work. Of course he would take the easy out. Enough money to not have to work, and one less mouth to feed? Of course it was the perfect deal. Sasha was only staring blankly at her parents as they both signed the paperwork without even considering how she might feel. They didn’t discuss it with her at all. Fuck, they didn’t even read anything. They just fucking agreed.

          "Perfect. It's settled then. Sasha, go upstairs and grab whatever you'd like to bring with you. Everything you need to be comfortable. We have a moving truck outside for your furniture, should you choose to keep it." Madelyn said with a polite smile.

          "Thank you." Sasha managed to squeak out before getting up from the table and hurrying back up the stairs without another word. This couldn't actually be happening, could it? She reached her bedroom and that same sinking feeling came over her upon seeing his face everywhere again. She placed a hand on her stomach as if it would ease the feeling, but it didn’t.

          "Well, well, I didn't know you were a fan." The charming voice of Homelander came from over her shoulder. She turned to see he'd followed her up the stairs. He probably told everyone else he was going to help her pack. It was horrifying, to see his face plastered all over her room. Photos that had once filled her with comfort and safety, now making her feel sick.

          "I was…" She said quietly before stepping back from him and looking around her room, not sure what she wanted to pack. It was hard to pack for a trip you didn't want to take. So many kickbacks. So many clothes. All the fucking posters she wanted to throw away.

          "Oh, come on, it couldn't have been that bad. I was gentle, wasn’t I? I didn't make you bleed. I didn't hit you. You didn’t end up in the hospital and I didn’t leave you in that alley. It could have been a whole hell of a lot worse." He explained, coming up behind her and slowly wrapping his arms around her in a rather protective hug, his hands on her stomach. He rested his chin on her shoulder and said quietly into her ear, "As long as you behave like a good girl for me… I can promise that next time I will make you feel so good that you forget your own name." He assured her, swaying back and forth gently. It would have been romantic if it wasn’t so fucking terrifying.

          "Yes sir…" She relented sadly before wiggling from his grasp and going to her dresser, starting to grab clothes she wanted. She turned to look at him, "Are there boxes in that moving truck? I'm going to need them." She said quietly. She really just wanted to change the subject to something, anything but him being inside of her the way he was. How was he so calm about all of this? The way he spoke, it was like a boyfriend she'd had for years.

          "Let me check." He said, followed by a strong burst of air that blew her hair back. In what was maybe only 2 seconds, the room was full of empty cardboard boxes, "Will that be enough?" He questioned.

          "Yeah. Probably." Sasha said, looking at all the empty boxes, a little awestruck. "Will you help me pack? I'm just… gonna bring everything."

          "Of course, darling." He responded. There was a more steady flow of strong air, and before her very eyes, the boxes were packed and labeled and stacked neatly. It was done before she'd even had a chance to really start.  She didn't think about him using his powers outside of hero work, but she supposed they would always exist.

          She sat down on the edge of her bed, the single t-shirt still in her hands, staring at the blank room. Her clothes and personal belongings were packed. The posters had been taken down. It went from her room to somewhere foreign in a matter of minutes. It wasn't until she took a good look, that she realized that even her bedding was packed. She sat on the edge of a bare mattress.

          "Come on, sweetheart." Homelander sighed quietly, standing before her and reaching out to gently caress a lock of her hair. "It doesn't have to be the end of the world. You're going to have a beautiful room right next to mine. I'll make sure you get everything and anything you could ever want. You'll live like a queen. The only real compromise is…" He said, crouching down so he could look up into her defeated face, "Is that you'll have to live with me…" He said with a kind tone.

          She didn't know what to say, so she only nodded her head as a tear slid down her cheek. She really didn't have anything else to say. Her whole world was crumbling around her, because of one bad decision that started the landslide that continued to engulf her.

          "That's my girl." He said with a smile, reaching up to cup her cheek sweetly, rubbing the flesh with his thumb, "I did promise you, didn't I?" He said, flashing that charming smile as he leaned up and tenderly touched his lips to hers.

          The feeling was gentle and sincere, like flower petals against her lips. This kiss was so different from anything she'd experienced the night before. It took the air from her lungs and made her stomach explode into Butterflies. She whimpered pathetically against his lips and moved her trembling hands to rest on either side of his neck.

         A low moan escaped him as he stood up, still cupping her cheeks while leaning down over her. He moved one hand behind her neck and slowly lowered her down onto the mattress, sliding his knee between her legs to kneel above her, his lips never leaving hers. He brought his knee up further until it pressed gently against her womanhood, rubbing her sensitive areas through her jeans.

          Then, something happened that surprised her. She took a small gasp and broke the kiss, a small moan leaving her lips. She moved her hand to cover her mouth, but he grabbed her wrist, placing gentle kisses on each finger tip.

         "Don't hide it, please. Let me hear it…" He pleaded quietly before moving his mouth back to her skin, kissing her neck this time, placing small bites on the vein. Sasha whimpered for a moment before an irrepressible moan came from her lips, a little bit louder this time. Her hips bucked against his thigh and she squirmed beneath him.

          "N… not here, please…" She moaned into his ear, wrapping her arms around his neck and slowly licking up the rim of his ear, "Not in this sad, empty room…"

          "Would you rather we wait until we've got you moved in? Perhaps we can call it housewarming." He smiled, leaning back and looking down at her, "I'll get everything loaded into the van and organized. You should go say goodbye to your parents."

         "Ah… right… my parents." She agreed with a small nod of her head before sitting up. My parents sold me to a man in his thirties without a second thought as soon as money was offered. They sold their only daughter into prostitution . She didn't like them, but the thoughts flooded her mind.

          She stood up and left the room, descending the stairs, to find her parents still sitting at the dining room table, a check out in front of them. She already knew it was for fifteen thousand dollars. Of course it was. She sat down across from them and remained silent. She could feel the breezes come and go as Homelander grabbed all of the boxes from her room and got them packed into the moving van. Moving, which should have taken the better part of a day, was going to take less than fifteen minutes because of him. She was grateful for that. She didn't know if she would have been able to do it herself. Not without actively contemplating suicide, anyway.

          "He told me to say goodbye to you." Sasha said quietly, "and I intend to. I hope you understand that I'll never call home. I'll never write. I won't add you on Facebook, or Instagram, or anything fucking else." She snapped, her tone growing more and more bitter.

          "Sweet Pea, don't be so upset." Her father started gently, "We thought you would want to live there instead. You'll have a better life than we could ever have given you. Besides, you love Homleander. You have ever since you were little!”

          "You assumed, Dad. You didn't ask. You just signed the papers and took the fucking money. I'm glad you'll have enough money to live comfortably, really, I am, but you don't have a daughter anymore." She said finally before standing up and looking over at Madelyn, "we are done here." She said firmly before walking past the older woman and stepping outside of the house. She walked toward the moving van and opened the passenger door, only to be stopped by a curious voice.

Madelyn was actually impressed with this kid, really. The conviction with which she spoke to her parents. Maybe she would survive this ordeal after all. Might even be able to keep Homelander in check if she was a quick learner. She turned to look toward the girl and she was trying to get into the moving truck.

         "Where on Earth do you think you're going? No. You're in this car, with me." Madelyn had called, standing next to a sleek black Escalade. "You get to ride with me. I was hoping we could chat some. You'll come with me to my office when we get to the Tower of Seven. I'll have Homelander unpack your things and start setting up your room. He's much faster than we are." She explained with that same polite, but very business-like smile.

         Sasha nodded her head in agreement, closing the door she'd still been holding. She walked back and got into the black car, sliding all the way over. The leather seats still smelled new and it was pristine inside, as if it had never been used. Madelyn slid in to the seat next to her and closed the door. The driver set off without another word.

          "First things first." Madelyn smiled, taking a clipboard out of her leather bag and handing it to Sasha with a plain black pen, "This contract simply states that you will not post anything about your relationship with Homelander on social media until after we have decided to have it go public. You aren't allowed to share anything overly personal, or that might damage his reputation. It's more or less a standard legal gag. If you're going to post anything, be it words, a photo, a video, it's better to ask us first. Saves a lot of headaches down the road. As we vaguely mentioned before, as long as you agree to these terms, you will be very well taken care of. You won't need to pay rent. We will get you anything you need. We will take you anywhere you want to go. Well, either us or Homelander. You'll always be accompanied by someone. Do you have any questions so far?"

          "Do we have to make this relationship public?" She questioned quietly, her fingers nervously scratching against the plastic clipboard. "I mean, it's only started… very… very recently. Are we sure we want it to go public before we know if it will last? And I mean, my age, isn't that an issue? I know you have my parents permission for legal purposes, but the general public might not approve of him seeing a sixteen year old girl. And what about my education? Am I still going to be able to attend school?"

          "Good questions." Madelyn smiled, "Homelander doesn't enter relationships that end quickly, so we aren't too worried about the longevity of it. As far as your age, we will just do a little bit of Fabrication and state that you're eighteen. The public won't necessarily like it because it's still quite the gap, but it's certainly better than sixteen. No, you won't be able to attend your school, or even an online school, not without outing your real age. We will have a private teacher hired for you for homeschool lessons. You won't miss out on anything. We promise. If you'd bothered to read it, all of this would be answered in those sheets on your lap. Maybe you should take a moment to read over it before signing."

          Sasha didn't say anything else, just looked down and began reading through the six page document before her. She hadn't finished by the time they reached the tower of Seven. She stopped reading it long enough to exit the car, follow Madelyn to her office, and sit down in the plush leather chair. She picked up her reading again and finally finished before looking over at Madelyn.

          "I only really have one question." Sasha said, "There's… this section here… 'I, Sasha Lannister, agree in perpetuity to obey and satisfy Homelander.' doesn't… that kind of mean forever?"

          "In a sense, though, we are certain he wouldn't ask anything of you if you were to break up. It's more or less just making sure we cover all of our bases." Madelyn responded with that same smile. Sasha was growing to hate that mockingly sincere smile. It felt patronizing.

          "Where is my room from here?" She questioned, taking a hard left turn in this conversation.

          "It's.." Madelyn seemed momentarily caught off guard, "probably six doors down, around the corner." She said, "why?"

          "It's…" Sasha lowered her voice and leaned forward, "because I don't want him to hear me… I think there has been a grave misunderstanding. I know my parents will be pissed, but I feel like you should know. This isn't a relationship, not even close. Before last night, I'd never even met Homelander in person. I met him, and he saved me, but only briefly before he decided to take advantage of me." She said, tears swelling in her eyes, "H-he raped me in an alley, and-"

          "Well." Madelyn said, a little exasperated, clicking her tongue, "Why on Earth would you try and tarnish the good name of Homelander like this? He has been nothing but kind to you." She continued on, "Besides. We have video footage from the alley last night." She added, raising a hand to click a button, aimed at the opposite wall.

          Sasha froze and slowly turned in her seat to face the opposite wall over the back of her chair. She could see herself in Homelanders arms, but the angle was bad. It was hard to see what he was saying. There was no sound. The picture began to move and she watched herself gagging on her fingers and putting them between her legs. The picture froze again and Sasha turned to look at Madelyn with wide eyes.

          Madelyn looked like the devil now. She leaned back in her chair, arms crossed over her chest. Her lips were pursed together tightly and the pure hatred and rage behind her eyes would not be concealed.

          "I suggest you sign the goddamn contract, you little bitch. If you even remotely try to come forward with a rape allegation, we will bury you. We will have this video 'leaked' to show your compliance. We will have you institutionalized. You'll live the rest of your pathetic life inside of a white padded room in a straight jacket, being abused and raped by the orderlies and patients. No one will stop them. No one will save you. You will rot there." Madelyn nearly growled her words. They dripped with venom. She leaned over her desk and unfolded an arm, tapping on the clipboard with a slender finger, "sign it. Worst case scenario, you 'date' Homelander for the next six months or so, and he gets bored and moves on. You're able to go back to your sad little existence outside the limelight. I promise you that not signing this is not in your best interest."

          Sasha only stared at the older woman in absolute horror while listening to the threats being made. No, not threats. Promises. She picked up the pen with a trembling hand and signed on the dotted line, effectively selling herself to Homelander and Vought Industries.

          "That a girl." Madelyn said with a smile, "I knew you were a smart girl. Come on. I'll show you to your room." She said, her tone having lost all of its poison as she stood from her desk and went to the door.

          Sasha followed her down the hall, to her room, stepping inside slowly. Madelyn slammed the door behind her and Sasha only stood for a moment, trying to comprehend what was to become of her now.

          "There you are! I was wondering what Madelyn had done to you." Homelander laughed quietly. Sasha raised her gaze and gasped.

          The room was at least five times the size of her own room. Her things were already unpacked and largely organized. She'd move a couple of lamps and probably take down all of the fucking posters, but other than that, it was beautiful. Homelander was standing on the far end, just adjusting a lamp on the nightstand.

         "We were just… talking about the finer details of the legal gag and contract. I had a few questions." She attempted to explain. She didn't blatantly lie to him, but she intentionally left out the parts about trying to come forward about the rape.

          "You know better than to lie to me." He sighed, the smile leaving his face, "Wasn't I good to you today? Wasn't I gentle and sincere and affectionate? Didn't I do a good job of showing you I can be the best boyfriend you've ever had?" He clenched his jaw then, "Apparently I didn't do a good enough job, seeing as you still tried to go crying to Madelyn about 'rape'." He sighed, "Do you remember what I said to you in your room?"

          "N-no…" She murmured, unable to remember. She was too horrified knowing that he'd heard what she said to Madelyn. She turned around to realize that the door was shut and Madelyn was already gone. She was already alone with him again. Her blood ran cold and she turned to face him again, her body starting to tremble.

          "Fucking try!" He shouted now, his voice was raised and his eyes began to glow red. "What did I say to you earlier!"

          "Y-you said that… as long as I was good… and b-behaved… y-you would make me feel good…" She whimpered, sobbing softly between, gasping for air. Her heart felt as though it was going to explode, or implode from the pressure it felt. She leaned back against the door, tears streaming down her face. "I… I'm sorry, Homelander…" She sobbed, "I.. I'm scared and everything is happening so fast… b-but I signed it. I signed the paper after I tried to tell her, and now I can't say anything bad anymore…" She tried to explain. She waited for him to burn her, or hit her, or maybe slam her head into this wall and split her skull. He could do so much worse to her than what he already did.

          "Shh…" He cooed softly, cupping her face and leaning down to kiss the tears. Savoring the salty taste on his lips. "Stop your crying." He urged her gently, sliding his arms around her to pick her up. He brought her over to the bed and laid her down, brushing her hair back from her face and making sure she was comfortably on her pillows, "I know it's a lot, but I promise it doesn't have to be all bad." He said, smiling down at her. It made her feel nauseous. It was the same smile of her poster she'd had above her bed before. Smiling down at her, but with no sincerity behind it. Smiling for the camera. Smiling for the fans. "Now… you did betray me, by telling Madelyn the truth." He said, placing a gloved hand on her throat and squeezing, just enough to be threatening, "and for that… I should punish you, but I won't. I won't, because it's a mistake you feel bad for, don't you?"

          "Y-yes sir. It was a mistake that won't happen again, I'm sorry." She whimpered, gripping his wrist, though she knew it was in vain. If he wanted to crush her, he could, and she'd be powerless against his strength.

          "Right. You feel bad, and more importantly, you signed the papers. The scary papers with words you didn't fully comprehend, only knowing you'd belong to me and me alone." He smiled, "and for that… I think you've been a very, very good girl, who deserves a reward… Take off your pants."

Chapter Text

"Wait… My pants…?" Sasha questioned with a rough swallow. Her throat felt dry and the action took a lot of effort. She squirmed beneath him, his hand still resting on her throat but not in a way that hurt her.

"Yes, your pants, silly girl." He chuckled, sliding his hand from her neck, down her chest between her tits, and to the waistband of her jeans, tugging playfully at the front, "I suppose I could make you feel good with them on, but it really will be easier and more comfortable without them." He assured her playfully.

It was absolutely insane how quickly he could change between kind and violent. She never knew what to expect out of his mouth. It was like fucking whiplash.

  "Oh… o… okay…" She breathed, sliding her hands to her waist and grabbing at the button on her jeans. Her hands were trembling so badly that she couldn't grab the button or bring it backward through the slot to free herself, "I… I'm sorry, I'm just really nervous… P-please don't be angry."

"I'm not angry, it's okay to be nervous." He chuckled, leaning over and placing a tender kiss at her temple, "If I may, I could do it for you." He offered, "You can say 'no', but I'm not sure I'll be in the mood to be so giving or gentle next time I ask."

"Yes… Please." She added the 'please' as an afterthought. She still didn't really want to do this, but being compliant seemed a much better option than trying to fight him. She wouldn't make any progress trying to fight him and she knew that.

"You're being such a good girl." He smiled, growling gently in her ear, "It's really making me hard. Do you want to touch it?" He offered, nuzzling his nose against her ear, growling again. He was so close and he smelled so good. She hated herself for thinking it, but it was true. She loved how he smelled, despite hating him.

Sasha didn't answer him. She didn't know what it was, but that growl made her tremble, but not out of fear. There was a warmth and a strange tingle between her legs that was very unfamiliar. Without even realizing she did it’ her hand had moved. Her palm gently cupped his erection through his uniform. She could feel how hard he was and how he throbbed beneath her touch.

He unbuttoned her pants with his one hand, before unzipping them and tugging at them gently. They didn't want to budge and that caused him to huff a little. He debated forcing them, but was enjoying her active consent and didn't want to ruin it. He moved to reposition himself on the edge of her bed. He reached up with both hands to grab the waist and gently shimmy the tight jeans down her legs and off. He let them fall to the floor before tossing his gloves with them.

He slid his bare hands up her thighs, a small moan leaving him. They were perfect legs that reminded him of runway models, toned and slender. Soft skin. Beautiful despite the recent bruising. He made sure to be careful of the bandages on her knees and tried not to touch the existing bruises. He didn’t want to hurt her. Not this time. He grabbed one calf in his hands and lifted her leg up slightly, leaning forward to pepper it with kisses before biting down on the muscle with a low growl. Not enough to hurt, just enough to have the sensation of teeth, at least, that was his goal.

Sasha only watched him as he removed her pants. Every action was so gentle now, so different from the other night. His skin against hers made her shutter and arch her back. His lips were soft and warm, but the bite caught her off guard. She cried out softly and sat up, pulling her leg from his grasp, looking down at him with wild eyes. She wanted to run away from him, but she was too terrified to move.

 "Shhh… shhh… You're okay. It was just a little nibble. I'm not going to hurt you. You don't have to be afraid of that today." He assured her, rubbing her thighs slowly and trying to make her relax again, "Lay your head back down on the pillow and get comfortable. I promised to make you feel good and I meant it."

"Okay, Homelander…" She murmured, laying back down and looking at the ceiling. She was confused for a moment. The poster that had been above her bed wasn't now, but he'd put up the rest of them.

"When you and I are alone, you can call me John…" He said before adding, with some discomfort, "My real name is John…"

She felt her heart beat so loud when he said that. It had never actually occurred to her that he was ever called anything other than ‘Homelander’, but it did make sense. He had to have been someone before he was leader of The Seven. As she lay down and looked up at the blank ceiling above her, she couldn't stop herself from asking, "Why didn't you put that poster back up…? You put the rest of them up…" She questioned, pointing toward the ceiling.

"I figured… Well, the ones on the walls might remind you of home…" He murmured, placing gentle kisses up her legs, layering them upon her thighs, sliding his hands up once more to grip the elastic of her panties. He pulled them down her thighs, waiting for her to struggle or flinch, but she didn't. Her confidence made him growl again. He reached her ankles and she actually moved her legs to help escape the fabric. He regained his thought process after being momentarily distracted by her thighs again, "I figured that you'd have to see this mug when going to bed and waking up anyway, so you really didn't need to see double."

"That's very kind." She relented, closing her eyes. "Thank you, John."

"You're welcome, Sasha." He smiled, showing the first time that he actually did know what her name was. He moved up her legs again and slowly parted them with his large hands, positioning himself between them, tossing her legs over his shoulders. She could feel his breath against her innermost thigh and her breath caught in her throat. She crossed her arms over her stomach and clutched her shirt with white knuckles.

"Just relax…" He breathed against her. He hadn't started touching her yet, because he was enjoying the view. He hadn't noticed last night, but the flesh was freshly waxed. Probably the day before the party he thought to himself, lucky me. The pink lips looked soft and inviting, even with a little bit of a shimmer on them. "What's this?" He questioned, more to himself than her, sliding his left hand up her thigh to rest his palm on her mons pubis. He brought his thumb down to gently rub across the folds, "My, my, are you actually wet for me today?" This time, the question was looking for a response. He eyed her face with one raised eyebrow, slowly moving his thumb across the slick folds. He was only a little disheartened that she wouldn’t look at him.

"I…" She choked on the words, her eyes wide and looking at the ceiling. How humiliating was this. She was feeling pleasure, though she hated herself for it. She hadn’t wanted to give him anything. She couldn’t bring herself to say anything to him. It’s just a biological response, She thought. I can’t hate it when you touch me like that, if you stop...

"That's alright. You don't need to answer. You're being so good." He assured her before using both of his hands to spread her folds, exposing her slightly swollen clit. He moved his head forward and let the tip of his tongue touch it before giving a little flick. He felt the muscles in her legs tighten for a moment and savored the feeling, "I'll make you moan…" He growled his promise before latching his mouth into her hot, throbbing pussy and sliding his tongue inside of her. She tasted like honey, with a touch of vanilla. He’d never tasted a person so sweet before. He dug in deeper, growling in his throat.

The breath left her lungs and she clutched at her shirt harder, using all of her self control not to jolt and buck her hips. It was so unlike anything she'd felt before. Before yesterday, she'd only had sex one time, and it was nothing like this. She felt his tongue wiggling around inside of her and she began breathing harder, a warm cherry blush crossing her cheeks. The pleasure was coming in stronger and stronger waves, as if someone was hitting her with a mild taser, but in a good way.

After a few minutes of this delightful torment, she managed to tear her eyes away from the ceiling to look down at him. She could only see the top of his blonde head, and there was a weird feeling in her chest that said that’s not enough . She moved her arms, though they seemed to weigh like lead, dragging across her stomach and then the bed, and propped herself up.

His blue eyes were already focused up at where her face was now, as if he had been expecting her to look at him. He didn't stop, simply moved his tongue to flick against her clit instead of inside. She did tremble now and her legs threatened to close, not that they could. Her legs were on his shoulders and his head was undoubtedly stronger than her legs. She wouldn’t be able to push him away or hurt him on accident or purpose. Before she could stop it, a quiet moan left her mouth while she watched him. She raised a hand to cover her mouth, but remembered what he had said to her earlier, Don’t hide it, please. Let me hear it. Remembering this is what caused her to move her hand back down onto the bed.

He took great pleasure in the look upon her face, his erection growing more uncomfortable within the confines of his clothes. He enjoyed it even more that she didn’t cover her mouth, though she clearly wanted to.

He could force her to rectify  his discomfort, but that wasn’t what he wanted to do, not today; not yet, at least. No, he wanted her to know all of the pleasure and intimacy he had to offer her. Perhaps, if she was worthy of it, he would show her how warm the light of his love could be. He savored every twitch of her muscles, and the sharp breaths she took while his mouth lavished her with attention. He pulled away for just a moment, just so she could watch him as he swirled the tip of his tongue around her tender clit.

“F… Fuck…” She murmured softly before another moan left her lips. He pulled his tongue away then, looking up at her curiously.

“Do you want me to stop?” He murmured, his breath hot against her wet folds.

“No.” She answered quickly, surprising even herself at the eagerness with which she wanted to feel him again. She did move her hips now, just slightly, arching her back to try and bring herself closer to his mouth. “Don’t stop yet.”

He wanted to call her a dirty, wanton slut, but he refrained. Degrading her for her consent would set a bad tone. He was afraid she’d ask him to stop, or start to struggle. No, words like that could wait until a later date.

“As you wish…” was all he said, with a small chuckle as he extended his tongue, sliding it between her nether lips before going as deep into her hot tunnel as he could reach. Her nectar was delectable and he couldn’t get enough of it. He kept licking harder, his nose brushing against her clit; he bobbed his head slightly to vigorously rub it. The pleasure was blinding now. She couldn’t see anything except for him, his steely blue eyes boring into her like hot metal spikes. She could feel it, her orgasm, the pleasure she wanted to stop from happening. It was a pleasure she had only ever made herself feel, before now, how could she stop him? Without thinking, she reached out and grabbed his cheeks. He was slightly startled, but he let her, curious to see just what she expected to accomplish. She pulled him up from her thighs and toward her face, locking her lips onto his.

His face was soaking, and she knew it was all her. Hell, she could taste herself on his lips, sweet and subtle. She didn’t hate it. She slid one hand up, twining her fingers in his hair, opening her mouth to lick his lips. He moaned against her, sliding one hand between her legs, slipping two fingers inside of her flawlessly, using his thumb to touch her clit, but not rub yet. He used his free hand to unlatch his belt and open his suit, pulling out his erection. Before he could even ask her to touch it, he could feel her free hand, gripping his shaft eagerly. She moaned when he did it, causing pre-cum to ooze from him and onto her hand. He hadn’t expected her to be so eager from just a little bit of tenderness from him. With that, he began to rub his thumb against her clit, causing her to whimper against his lips. She tugged at his hair, and he liked it, as she tried to break the kiss. He put his free hand on the back of her head to keep her lips against his. He felt her moaning against his lips, his tongue invading her mouth as the sounds escaped her. That’s it. That’s a good girl. Cum. Cum for me. Cum hard on my fingers so I can give you something bigger, He thought.

Just as if he had commanded it out loud, she did as she was told. Her whole body jerked in his grasp and a small, pathetic scream left her. Her legs tried to shut around his hand, but he didn’t budge, not even a little. The juices dripped down his fingers and he could feel her clit pulsating beneath his thumb, now overly sensitive due to the orgasm that surely rocked her.

Rock her it did. It was blinding. She didn’t know who she was, or where she was, or who she was with. All she knew was that the pleasure was otherworldly and it was the only thing that mattered. Her hand squeezed his shaft as she moaned for him, her legs trembling and her chest heaving. He finally broke the kiss so that he could look down at her. Her black hair untamed, emerald eyes glossed over with some sort of feral lust, makeup running from her eyes, her lipstick smeared.

“You are just about the most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen.” He breathed as he continued to look down at her. “I’d like to be inside of you, if you’d allow it. I promise I won’t hurt you like last time.” He promised softly against her ear.

The word ‘beautiful’ hit her ears and that blush continued to creep across her cheeks while he looked down at her.

This was the first time he looked the way she had always seen him in her dreams, and in her posters. In that moment, he looked like the hero she grew up obsessing over from afar. The concern and adoration she could see in those blue eyes. His hair, now flawed, due to her fingers still twined in it. It was soft and silky. She moved her fingers from his hair to gently trace her fingertips across his cheek, trembling slightly as she did so. It was only when she trembled, that she felt that his hand was still between her legs; his fingers still inside of her. His skin was smooth and flawless, just like she’d always imagined.

Why couldn’t you have asked the first time, she thought, I would have wanted you so badly if you had just… asked me. She didn’t notice that, while these thoughts ran away with her, tears filled her eyes and began to roll down her cheek.

“Sasha… Sasha, sweetheart, what’s wrong…?” He questioned softly, removing his fingers from inside of her, placing his hand on her thigh, “If you don’t want to-” He started. He didn’t know if he was really willing to accept ‘no’ for an answer, but seeing her cry made him want to try.

“N-no…” She sniffled, giving him a worried smile, stroking his cheek again, “I just…” She looked away from him, not knowing if she could continue her explanation.

“Hey, look at me… Tell me what’s going on in that head of yours.” He said, laying her back on the bed to free up one of his hands, so he could gently poke the center of her forehead, “You don’t need to be scared of me.”

“I wish… I wish you’d have asked me the first time…?” She answered sheepishly, struggling to look at him now, “I feel like… I’d still be here, but I wouldn’t be afraid of you, or my posters…”

“I already told you, sweetheart…” He smiled, kissing her forehead gently, “As long as you obey me, I’ll never hurt you. Now, going back to my question… May I be inside of you? Let me show you how good I can make you feel. Let me be the hero you grew up with.” He moaned into her ear. True, his erection had lost some of its vigor in the last few minutes, but it was far from flaccid.

“Yes…” She nodded her head, shifting slightly beneath him. “Wait..” She said, sitting up, causing him to move to the side slightly. She took off her shirt, lifting it over her head. She grabbed the back of her bra and unlatched it, freezing for a moment as the straps fell down her arms. Her heart began beating quickly again. Did she really want him to see this much of her? Would it really be that different from the day in the alley?

He noticed her freeze, though the sight of more skin was giving new life to his erection. He leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on her shoulder, sliding his hand down her thigh, squeezing her knee gently. She turned toward him and a smile crossed her lips, and it was all the encouragement she needed to remove the bra and let it fall.

“Make yourself comfortable.” He encouraged her gently, patting her hip.

“Are you sure?” She questioned, looking up at him again, “I… I have a different idea, kind of.” She said with a brief, devious look. “I want you inside of me, but would you be willing to work with me? Please? I think it’s the least you can do, since, you know… Yesterday?”

“That depends on what you want from me, little girl.” He said with his signature smile, giving her a quick wink.

“Get up, turn around, take your clothes off…” She instructed, a little more firm now that she was feeling more brave. She slid her hand down and grabbed his semi-hard cock and gave a rough squeeze. She could feel it harden and she knew it wasn’t too hard, “And get this good and hard for me again…”

“I like the way you talk…” He growled before getting off of the bed and doing as she instructed. He removed everything with ease and turned his back to her, slowly stroking his shaft while he thought about what kind of surprise she might be preparing for him. He wasn’t even a little bit concerned about her trying to hurt or assassinate him like this. There was nothing in this room that would help her, oh, and he was invulnerable. He sort of smirked to himself thinking about it.

She watched him do as she asked, with slight disbelief. He certainly didn’t have to if he didn’t want to. She sure as fuck wasn’t going to make him. Looking at him was mind blowing. He was perfect, smooth, and sculpted. She could see his arm moving ever so slightly, and she knew he was doing all that she asked. Reaching down, she slid her fingers between her legs. She was still dripping down her thighs. Good, she was still well lubricated. She lay back on the bed, moving the pillow aside so she could be flat. She took a deep breath and gripped her legs behind her knees and pulled them up. To her surprise, her knees rested upon her shoulders without any uncomfortable stretching or pain. She could hardly believe she was still this flexible.

“Okay… I’m ready…” She called nervously, turning her head to try and hide her face behind her leg, closing her eyes tightly.

He turned around, not quite sure what to expect, but a deep, guttural groan escaped him when he looked at her. He began throbbing with need again, precum oozing from the tip in abundance. He stopped stroking and walked back to her, kneeling on the bed, placing his hands on her thighs and squeezing softly.

“My, my, my… Don’t you look positively delicious.” He moaned, leaning over her and allowing his length to rest against her wet folds, throbbing and at full attention. “I want you to look at me, please. I want to see the look on your face when I claim that sweet pussy of yours.”

She reluctantly stopped hiding behind her leg and looked up at him. The moment she did, she felt the tip inside of her, quickly followed by the rest. She gasped, her eyes going wide and her mouth the shape of an ‘O’.

“Do you like that?” He moaned, starting to thrust inside of her. He held himself above her with ease, so much so, that he shifted his weight to one arm so the other could reach down and rub her clit. “I want to feel you cum on my hard cock.”

“F-fuck…” She whimpered, staring up at him with eyes that slowly started to roll back in her head. “Oh god…. F-fuck…” She groaned, arching her back. She wanted to close her legs and put them down, but she couldn’t. They left her shoulders, but halted on his. “N-no~!” She protested weakly as she hit another orgasm, causing him to feel bigger, and more lubricated almost instantly.

“That’s my girl. Look at that beautiful face with my dick inside you. I wonder how deep I could go?” He purred, kissing her desperately, grabbing the small of her back and standing with ease, holding her up by her ass and her shoulder. He kept her legs on his shoulders and began thrusting again, hitting deeper and deeper. At times, it was too much for her and it hurt, like a suckerpunch deep inside, but she didn’t ask him to stop. She didn’t think he would. She’d rather just continue, than know he would rape her again.

“You’re so much more accepting when you’ve been licked a little first, aren’t you?”

“Y-yes sir…” She moaned, gasping as he rocked into her over and over, a small scream leaving her as the pain turned to pure discomfort, feeling him deeper than he had been before. Even when he tried to pull back to thrust, he didn’t come far out. No. He didn’t come out at all. She stared at him with a new sort of fear in her eyes, “I… I think… I think you’re inside my womb…” She gasped.

“Good… That’s a good place to be.” He growled eagerly, “I’m going to paint your fucking cunt with my seed. Do you want to feel it, little girl?”

“Y-yes please…” She said, though it was a lie. No, she absolutely did not! She didn’t want this man to cum inside of her without a condom for the 2nd time in two days!

“Beg me for it.” He growled, grinding his hips against her, “Beg me to put a baby in you.”

“P-please, Mr. Homelander, sir… Put a baby in me…” She moaned, unable to stop herself. And as she had reluctantly requested, he did. She felt load after load filling her to the brim, uncomfortably so. Her eyes rolled back in her head and she let out a scream. Not a moan, not a cry, a scream, as her orgasm washed over her again.

“You’re so gorgeous…” He growled, laying her down on the bed. He pulled back far enough to lower her legs down around his waist, but he did not pull out of her. He lay on top of her on the bed, kissing and biting her neck and shoulders. His hands wandered up to find her breasts, soft and plump. He squeezed them gently, pinching her perky nipples and savoring the feeling of her skin.

“As long as you obey me… I’ll always make you feel good…” He reminded her, placing a tender kiss on her cheek before whispering with a much darker tone, “Imagine how much all of this would have hurt if you said no to me.”

Chapter Text

Sasha closed her eyes and nodded her head, trying to ignore the threat within those words. She wanted to go back to how he was only moments ago. She nuzzled her nose against his neck. He wasn’t sweating, not even a little. Yet, she lay here shimmering in the light from the dew across her flesh. She was still trembling, but it was faint. He was still so deep inside of her. She felt all of him, even though he was no longer erect.

He smiled when she came back to him. She was learning after all. He pulled himself from inside of her and allowed her legs to lower to the bed before he rested beside her, one arm outstretched above his head while he turned to face her. She was beautiful and still blushing. He reached out and placed a warm hand on her chest, swirling his finger around her erect nipple. There was a look on her face, he didn’t quite understand.

“What’s on your mind?” He inquired softly.

“Am I… Am I going to get pregnant..?” She questioned, turning her head to look at him. She was growing more confident around him, but she was still treading lightly with her bravery. Especially now that sex wasn’t a bargaining chip as immediately as it had been. “You’ve…. You’ve cum inside me-”

“I can’t get you pregnant.” He said with a sad look on his face. To her surprise, it was genuine, heart wrenching sadness. He sighed and sat up with his back to her, “One of the down sides of being a god, is not even having the ability to pass on your genetics to future generations. I suppose the universe needed to limit us somehow.”

She couldn’t bear the anguish in his voice. She slowly got up on her knees and wrapped her arms around his neck from behind. Her breasts pressed against his bare back, her head against his.

“I’m sorry…” She whispered, “I shouldn’t have said what I did… It must have been hard for you to hear…”

“No.” He said, shaking his head, placing his hands on hers gently, “I liked it. You just… Talking to me as if I could get you pregnant is a thrill. Don’t stop.” He urged, lifting one of her hands to gently kiss her knuckles, “Now. I have some business to tend to. You should take a shower. There’s an array of stuff waiting for you in the bathroom. Get dressed and take a roam around the tower. There are guards outside your door, they’ll follow wherever you lead. Nowhere is off limits to you.” He assured her before leaving her grasp, turning to kiss her forehead, and getting dressed.

She sat on the bed and watched him as he adjusted the minor parts of his suit and brushed his hair back into place flawlessly. He turned and gave her his signature wink, which caused butterflies in her stomach as he left the room.

She stood up and sighed, walking to a dresser and smiling when she grabbed the knob on the drawer. It felt like home. Maybe being here wouldn’t be so bad after all.

He did tell her that she could have anything. She would be treated like a queen. All she had to do was spread her legs for him when he asked it of her. Really, it wasn’t that high a price. Especially not when she was more cooperative and it didn’t hurt so badly. Once she allowed herself to relax, it really was mind blowing. Just the thought of it was causing her clit to throb with need.

She finished opening the drawer and pulled out a T-shirt with Homelander on it. A wide variety of feelings flooded over her when looking at it. Humiliation, that she had been so obsessed with a man she honestly, truly, knew absolutely nothing about. Anger at what he did to her in that alley…. And one more thing that surprised her, need. The throbbing returned and without really thinking, she put on the shirt. She put on some short, black, fabric shorts that barely covered the tops of her thighs. They couldn’t even be seen beneath the hem of her shirt.

She walked across the room to the bathroom and was astounded by the large, open shower. Everything was slick stone. She barely recognized the dial in the shower for the water, it was disguised so well. Try as she might, she could not find a shower head. This realization caused her to turn the dial. The water rained from the ceiling gently and warm, like a summer rain. She held her hand in the water for a minute, smiling to herself before turning it off and going to the sink. The hairbrush seemed to be made of ivory, but she didn’t want to question it. She brushed her hair neatly before setting the brush back down.

The idea of leaving the room seemed monumental. Crossing the room, her heartbeat quickened. She paused at the door and took a deep breath before opening it. She poked her head outside.

There were no heroes that she could see, just people in business suits with clipboards all looking very busy. Much too busy to pay attention to a young girl just looking out of a doorway. Surely most of them had no idea who she was, or that she lived here now. Only those who needed to know would know.

She stepped into the hall and closed the door behind her, resting against it for a moment. No one even looked up at her as they hurried by. She liked it. She liked being invisible like this. The biggest worry she had is that everyone would treat her differently because Homelander had taken a shine to her the way he did. It certainly was no fault of her own that he was drawn to her. Strange things happened in this world.

She roamed down the hall, looking at all of the doors and reading the names that went with them. There was a curve she reached, and large portraits of all the heroes were hung up. Each photo was just their face, and it had to have been at least three feet high. She stepped back and looked at the large picture of Homelander, mentally scolding herself. How had she spent so many years idolizing a man whose darkness she could not see? How could he hide such darkness so flawlessly?

Her mind began to race then. The ease with which he had raped her in the alley suddenly became much more horrifying. How many more girls had gone through this? She couldn’t remember any public ‘relationship’ announcements, so there probably hadn’t been any. She was quite the avid fan. She’d have known if there was a girlfriend other than Queen Maeve, brief as that had been. Back to the more concerning point at hand. How many girls had he raped in alleys? How many gagged into legal silence? How many were institutionalized when they refused to cooperate with this devil company?

“Well, hello there. Are you lost?” A familiar voice asked. Familiar? What could be familiar here that wasn’t Homelander. She tore her eyes away from the picture to turn and see another heroic face. The Deep. She once had posters of him in her room, too, but that changed when she was around fourteen and ‘matured’ to Homelander. Ha… Matured. She was just a kid, thrust into a very adult world overnight.

“Oh, no. Not exactly.” She said with a timid smile, tucking a lock of hair back behind her ear, “I’m just taking a look around. I um…” She didn’t quite know what to say, “Seem to have lost my tour guide? So I am just kind of wandering around.” She explained before holding a hand out and crossing it around to survey the area, “No one has even looked at me the entire time I’ve been here.”

That last part was probably a lie. She didn’t really pay attention to the world around her while she was lost in her thoughts of Homelander.

“Well, it’s your lucky day. I’m between my missions right now and have a couple of hours free. If you’d like, I could be your tour guide.” He suggested, offering his muscular arm along with a dashing smile.

“Um… Sure… Thank you.” She smiled, taking his arm nervously. Would Homelander be mad at her for talking to him? For touching him platonically like this? For letting him show her around? Worse, was he just like Homelander? Just looking for an opportunity to take advantage of her? God, please don’t let it be so. Please, let him be good. Please at least let one hero actually be just and good and not a horrible monster.

         The Deep showed her to their lavish shared bathroom exclusively for The Seven. It was damn near entirely made of gold and marble. She didn’t understand why there was such a large, shared bathroom. Did every hero not get their own? How come she got her own bathroom? Did Homelander have one?

The next stop was the kitchen, which smelled better than anything she’d ever experienced before. So many spices and the smell of cooked meat.

He even introduced her to one of their personal chefs, Carlos, and let her sample some of their offerings. Really just small slices of meats and cheeses, but they were delightful all the same. It wasn't until that moment that she realized she hadn't eaten in almost a whole day. She would ask Homelander for his help later to get a decent amount of food. He should help, right? She couldn’t imagine he’d want to starve her, not if he wanted to keep her a willing and active participant in his depravity.

“This is where the magic happens.” The Deep smiled, offering a small wink. He held his arm out and suddenly a door she hadn’t noticed slid open. She gasped and stared in wonder. Her feet moved before she could stop them. It was their room!

It was the room of The Seven! Their private meeting room. She walked toward the center of the room, down the three steps and stopped, looking at the large “7” shaped table. It was black, smooth, and she could see her own reflection clearly on its surface. Gosh, they must polish it every single day. They, meaning the janitors, not The Seven.

“I never thought I’d see this room!” She exclaimed excitedly before turning around. Despite what she had recently endured, she was excited to be here. To see this. Everything she had dreamed of since she was a little girl.

The smile quickly faded from her face when she realized the door was closed behind them, and he was walking toward her. The look in his eyes was a look she’d seen before. She’d seen it on so many men in her life, including Homelander. He was looking at her like she was a frightened rabbit, and he was the big bad wolf. She was just a piece of meat to him, too, wasn’t she? God damn it.

No… Please, no… She thought to herself before closing her eyes. She took a steady breath and opened her eyes, offering him a small smile.

“I um…” She cleared her throat, “I really ought to get back to my tour group…” She murmured, looking down at the floor, which was also well polished. She took a few steps to the side and he mirrored her, blocking her exit.

“Hey now. You’re safe here. You’re with one of The Seven.” He chuckled softly. He stopped just about six inches from her. He was close. Way, way too close. Homelander would be so angry with her. She never should have walked around when he told her to explore.

Was… Was this a test? She had a thought then, that Homelander and Madelyn both said she’d have bodyguards everywhere she went. That included inside the tower, right? 

Homelander is somewhere… He’s watching. He set this up. He wants to know how I’ll react. He’s testing me, I know it.

“Yes… Safe…” She murmured, looking up again. He was closer still, leaning down with that same look in his steely blue eyes. He raised a hand to gently grip a lock of her hair between this index finger and his thumb, bringing it to his lips.

“You know… I’m kind of like… Second in command around here.” He said with a small smile, “If you want, for a little favor, I could show you what chair belongs to Homelander and let you sit in it…” He said before smiling a little more deviously, “Or for a bigger favor, I can introduce you to him.”

“What…. What kind of favor are you talking about?” She whispered, too curious not to.

“Just…” He shrugged, gripping her hand gently with his own and guiding it toward his cock, though it was still within his suit, “A little touching… and if you put it inside you, you can meet Homelander… He really is just as great as everyone says. I promise that meeting him will be worth a little discomfort. What do you say, gorgeous?”

“Are all of you heroes monsters…?” She sighed, sounding rather defeated. She pulled her hand from his grip and looked up at him, “I’m not going to do anything for you. Not now. Not ever.” She said firmly, “I’m much more afraid of Homelander than I am of you.”

“Afraid?” He scoffed, “Now, why would you be afraid of our number one hero?” He laughed before the smile faded from his face when he came to the realization, “Oh. You’ve already met him then, huh? Bummer, that sucks dude.” He sighed.

In that moment everything that had been suave and charming about him vanished in the blink of an eye. Now, he was just like every other douchebag dude-bro she’d ever gone to school with. Every guy who had ever tried to sweet talk his way into her pants. He really was a pig, just like everyone else. She had really hoped that maybe, just maybe, one of these heroes would be real…

She heard the door slide open, but couldn’t see through The Deep; who was still looking very disappointed in her answer.

“Well done, Sasha!” The booming and heroic voice of Homelander called from the doorway right before the door slid closed again. She quickly moved to be farther from The Deep, but this pushed her right back against the edge of the table, causing it to dig into her lower back.

“H-homelander, I-” She began, feeling her heart begin to race. When The Deep talked to her, she wasn’t afraid of him, not like she was afraid right now. She was right. This was a fucking test. Hopefully she passed. Fuck.

“You did very well. The Deep has a bad habit of overstating his importance to the team in order to get into the pants of young and unsuspecting ladies.” Homelander chuckled, draping an arm over The Deep’s neck. The Deep froze and there was a look of fear on his stubbled face. He turned his head slightly to look at Homelander, swallowing hard.

Sasha took this opportunity to slide to the side so she could back away from them even further. She didn’t like being so close. If Homelander was going to beat the fuck out of someone, she wanted it to be The Deep, not her.

“Sit your ass down, Sasha.” Homelander said firmly, all good humor having left his voice. He didn’t turn to look at her when he spoke, he was still focused on The Deep.

Sasha did as she was told. She grabbed the closest chair and sat in it, her eyes wide as she stared at the two men. She wanted to stay out of this. To disappear again, but she knew Homelander wasn’t going to let that happen until he was finished.

“I’m sorry.” The Deep murmured, looking sheepish, “I didn’t realize she was yours.”

“Even if she wasn’t mine, what you did was no way to approach a lady. Especially not a young and respectable woman like…. Don’t look at me like that.” Homelander sighed at the end, finally turning to look at Sasha. She didn’t know how he knew, but he saw the look of anger starting on her face at his hypocrisy. “How about you tell The Deep how we met.”

After he suggested this, he released his fellow hero and walked to his seat. He was careful not to sit on his cape. He smiled charmingly at them both and held out a hand, as if giving Sasha the floor.

“Oh, and there are no cameras in here. Go ahead and tell him the real story, not whatever bullshit lies PR is going to have you tell the public.” Homelander added almost as if it were unimportant.

“Yesterday night…” Sasha started quietly before glancing over at Homelander with shame in her emerald eyes, “Do… I have to..?” She asked in a small voice.

“I’m not going to ask you again, Sasha.” Homelander warned. With that, his eyes turned red. The entire eye socket was red and glowing like the devil was inside of him.

“Yesterday night, I was dressed like a tramp and went to a highschool party. The football team was going to rape me.” She said hurriedly, turning to look at The Deep. She was frantic and tears swelled in her eyes, “H-homelander saved me from them. He made sure none of them touched me and that I was safe.” she said, trying to force a smile. The Deep opened his mouth to say something, but Sasha put a hand up to silence him, “Th-then he said that they had the right idea, and proceeded to rape me in the alley he found me in. N-now I’m here and I’ve never been more terrified in my entire life. I really think that what you just tried to do is going to get me killed.”

“You are such a good girl.” Homelander said with a happy, almost wistful sigh, “Isn’t she just the greatest, Deep? Beautiful and obedient. Aren’t you, Sasha?”

“Y-yes sir, Homelander…” She said sadly, lowering her eyes, causing the tears to roll down her freckled cheeks.

“Hey, Homelander, come on. Don’t take it out on her just because I’m a horndog.” The Deep pleaded quietly, “She’s yours. I know that now. I’ll never try anything dumb like this again. She’s all yours.”

“She is, isn’t she?” Homelander smiled, leaning back in his chair. “Sasha, come here. Get on your knees under the table and suck my cock.”

Sasha lifted her head and turned to face him in despair. She didn’t want to do something so degrading, not in front of someone else. Let alone another hero.

“Homelander, please…” She begged softly, “Not like this…”

“Really, is that how you feel?” Homelander said with a raised eyebrow. He stood from his chair and began toward her. A small cry of panic left her throat, but before she could even try to run, he was on her. He held her hands behind her back in one of his hands, and his other hand was wrapped around her neck, under her chin, forcing her to face The Deep.

“Now… How do you think this makes me feel, Sasha? After your pretty little speech about turning him down, and belonging only to me… That you’d turn around and reject me in front of him. Did you get too confident when we were alone together in your room?” As he spoke, each word became more angry and hostile. When he finished, he slid his hand from her neck, and into her hair. He gripped the hair hard, near the scalp, careful not to pull any out. She screamed from surprise, her eyes wild with terror. She struggled, but did not make any headway against his grip. It was like being tied with lead.

“Do you want to change your mind, whore?” Homelander growled, taking her head and slamming her down against the table so she was bent over it. She cried out in pain and terror as her head hit the cold, smooth table and the pain jolted through her and began to throb. He had released her hands and they were splayed across the table, her fingers fluttering frantically as if they could grab something, but there was nothing. The scream that had left her rattled the room, or at least, the people in it. An animal caught in a trap, knowing this was their last moment, that was the sound she had made.

“Y-yes please.” She sobbed, her tears streaming now, starting to form a puddle beneath her aching cheek. “Y-yes please Homelander, I would like to change my mind. I’m sorry. I’m a stupid girl and I’m not that brave. I won’t tell you no anymore.” She sobbed. The words were broken and rattled as they left her, making them hard to understand.

But understand he did. He slowly released her hair and she heard him walk away and sat back in his chair.

“Come here, Sasha.” He beckoned gently.

 She slowly peeled herself up from the table, the tears still streaming down her cheeks. She slowly brushed a messy lock of hair back from her face. She didn’t look at The Deep, and turned only to Homelander.

“Yes sir…” She nodded, walking toward him. She reached him and hated the smug look of satisfaction on his face.

“Really, Homelander, you don’t-” The Deep started again.

“Shut the fuck up!” Homelander yelled angrily, his eyes glowing red again, “Or so help me god I’ll turn you into sushi.” This silenced The Deep, who just watched in deep discomfort.

Sasha sniffled slightly and began to lower herself down, but Homelander grabbed her shoulders to stop her. Oh, thank goodness. He was changing his mind. He wasn’t going to make her do this. 

“I changed my mind. Take off your pants and sit on my cock.” He instructed.

“Yes sir…” Sasha whimpered sadly, grabbing her shorts by the waistband and pulling them down along with her underwear in one motion. She had only barely reached her knees when he grabbed her and pulled her onto his lap. She could feel the hard head of his cock pressing against her.

“W-wait! Gentle!” She cried out desperately, reaching down to grab his shaft, “P-please… I’m still sore from earlier and I’m not wet…”

“Oh, aren’t you?” Homelander growled, sliding his hand between her legs and drawing his fingers through her folds, rubbing his fingers together to feel her nectar, “It seems as though you’re lying to me. You love it, don’t you? The thrill? The danger?” He growled, gripping her hips and pulling her down onto him, moaning loudly as he felt her tight pussy stretching to accept him. “Just as tight as ever.” He growled.

“I…” Sasha gasped, her eyes going wide before she closed them, “I do love it…” She whimpered as she began to cry again, tears rolling down her cheeks. She cried out in pathetic pain as she sat down on his lap, feeling him reach her deepest depths. “I…” She hiccupped, “I love your hard cock and how you scare the hell out of me… Knowing that if I don’t listen to you, you could incinerate me without a second thought. I love that you make men like The Deep look like pathetic children.” She sobbed.

“That’s my good girl.” Homelander moaned in her ear, having never broken eye contact with The Deep during this time. “You can go.” He ordered, “Just remember that she’s mine.”

“I… Um…” The Deep started before shaking his head, “I think I’m going to stay. There is a risk that someone could see you like this if I open the door. We really can’t risk your reputation like that.” He said with a forced smile.

“You’re right.” Homelander smiled, thrusting hard and causing Sasha to scream again. Her hands slid to her stomach. She felt like he was going to puncture right through her. Fuck, he already might have. She couldn’t tell. He was so much stronger than her. “That’s actually some smart thinking for you, Deep. I’m proud of you. Maybe you’re not completely worthless, fish boy.”

In truth, The Deep didn’t care about Homelander’s reputation, he cared about the girl. Well, as much as he could for having just met her. Though he was a shameless horndog, this whole sexual violence thing wasn’t his deal. Yeah, sometimes lies and coercion, but never straight up rape like this. He was hoping, optimistically, that maybe Homelander would go easy on her. What more could Homelander want, anyway? He had put The Deep in his place. He’d gotten his poor slave to submit to him. Everything now was just for his sick enjoyment.

Sasha kept crying softly, but did not try to get away from him. She did not jerk or flinch with each painful thrust he gave her. She wished she’d never gone to that party.

Something began happening then. The pain eased. He hadn’t stopped but she couldn’t feel it. She couldn’t feel anything. She looked at The Deep, and he was blurry, and seemed a million miles away. She closed her eyes, but her balance immediately left her and she slouched forward. She thought she might faint. What was happening?

“You’re not trying to run away, are you?” Homelander growled, grabbing her hair and pulling her back against his chest. Sasha didn’t respond, only fell limp against him, her eyes glossed over and focused on nothing. The Deep had seen that look before and he stepped around the table.

“Homelander, she’s bleeding!” He cried out, “You need to stop!”

“Like fuck I…” Homelander argued, lowering his eyes to see the massive amount of blood beneath them. He hadn’t noticed the smell. In his line of work, everything smelled like blood and burning flesh more often than not. “Fuck.” He whispered, pulling her off and laying her down on the floor beside the pool of blood. He looked up at The Deep and The Deep saw something he’d never seen before.

Fear.

Real. True. Deep. Fear.

“Get a doctor! Now! Tell them it’s an emergency!” Homelander barked the orders. “Where the fuck is A-Train when you need him.” He growled, looking down at Sasha, stroking her hair, “Hey, hey… Come on. Look at me.”

Sasha didn’t say anything but her eyes slowly shifted from nothingness to look at his face, tears still sliding from them. She wanted to apologize, but she couldn’t. Her lips wouldn’t move and no words would come out. He was hard to look at. She hated that look on his face. For a moment, he looked like he might actually have emotions. He might actually care. She knew, deep down, it was a lie, or an act.

Oh well, at least if she died, she wouldn’t be his anymore.

Chapter Text

Madelyn was in the room with the doctors as they spoke. She was standing with her arms crossed. She wore a white blouse with a black flower pattern on it, and a knee-length pencil skirt. She only looked down at the young girl laying in the white bed, with bruises on her neck and arms, an IV drip attached.

The doctors said that her vaginal wall had been punctured, which is what caused the sudden and intense blood loss. They said it looked as though the hole had been punctured, but then spread open. Luckily, they were able to stitch everything back shut and promised there would be minimal lasting effects. These were the best doctors money could buy. The doctors for heroes, of course they were specifically trained against death and lasting damage. Hell, Queen Maeve shattered every bone in her arm into shards, and they still managed to repair it and keep it operational.

“Let me know when she wakes up, please. I need to be the first person she speaks to when she wakes up, not Homelander.” Madelyn said firmly, “I know he will want to be in this room, but I promise he won’t hurt you when you tell him ‘No’.” She said before turning to stare at the wall with the door, glaring at it slightly, “He would never disregard a direct order from me.” She finished before sighing down at Sasha. She didn’t say anything to the unconscious girl, but she did feel just a little bit of pity. She knew that Homelander could have a bit of a mean streak, but she didn’t think he’d fuck a kid to death.

“Yes, Miss Stillwell.” The two doctors echoed softly, still mostly focused on their clipboards and monitor readouts.

Madelyn left the room then and closed the door behind her quickly, turning her head to face Homelander. She knew he was outside of the room, watching. Of course he was. He didn’t have to be in the room to see her. He could see and hear everything clearly. His posture was straight, and his hands behind his back in a sort of formal pose. He didn’t turn to look at her, he was still intensely focused on Sasha. Of course he was. The new toy he had barely removed from the plastic was already in pieces on the floor, and mommy was trying to super glue it back together. Good as new.

“Is she going to be okay?” Homelander asked quietly, still not looking at Madelyn.

“Yes, luckily, she will be fine. She’s going to need to recover for a few months. She will need bi-weekly check ups to see how the stitches are holding and dissolving. Once they are completely gone, she still needs two or three weeks to make sure the scar tissue is strong and set.” She explained with a small sigh, “What the fuck were you thinking, Homelander?”

“I wasn’t.” He sighed, “It wasn’t even about the sex… It was control.” He admitted shamelessly, “The Deep had tried to take advantage of her, and I wasn’t going to stand for that. He can’t treat her that way.”

“Because only you get to treat her like a lifeless fuck doll, right?” Madelyn interjected. She watched his jaw clench, but he didn’t say anything. He knew she was right, but that didn’t make him like it.

“I’ll be more careful with her.” He assured her softly, finally turning his head to look at her. He hated the disappointed look on her face. He wanted to burn it off of her. “Even if that means I can’t have sex with her for a while.” He added with a shrug, “She’ll be fine… I’ll make sure of it.”

“Good. The public is in an uproar because no one knows who the fuck she is. The pictures that the paparazzi took of you kissing her forehead are plastered all over every news station, newspaper and trashy magazine. The world is craving to know who this young girl is. Hell, we had to put armed guards at her parents house so that they wouldn’t get harassed about her. Not that they know anything about your ‘relationship’ with her, but even that can be damaging. A grown man secretly dating their daughter? How naughty. We don’t want her or you to be shown in such scandalous red lighting.”

“Are you really going to start talking business, right now? She’s barely out of surgery-”

“Because of your fuck up, Homelander.” Madelyn snapped, “I’m just cleaning up your mess. Everything has been a mess since the moment you fucking laid eyes on her.”

“I don’t know what-”

“Don’t fucking lie to me, Homelander.” She growled impatiently before waving a dismissive hand, “It doesn’t matter. I’ll speak to her when she wakes up. I have a list from PR sitting at your station of the things you need to accomplish today. Interviews, crimes to bust, the usual. Don’t rush through them just to get back here. Take your time, she won’t be awake for a few hours anyway. I need to get back to my desk to finish scheduling all of the interviews she will have in the coming weeks. I still need to hire a fucking PR person for her too. Jesus, it’s like hiring a new super, except it doesn’t cost me a million dollars.” Madelyn sighed and waited a few moments, but he didn’t budge, “Right now, Homelander.”

“Yes Ma’am.” He said begrudgingly before turning on his heels and walking past her down the hall, “I’m going to want to speak with her, Madelyn. I swear to god if you don’t tell me the moment she wakes up, I’ll-”

“You’ll what? Throw a temper tantrum? You don’t scare me. Get your ass back to work.”

With that, he did not argue, not this time. He knew that she was right. Everything was so fragile, and it’s only because he hit their solid ice with a sledge hammer a few times, very rapidly. They needed to tread lightly now, lest they break through. He continued down the hall and disappeared into the meeting room to go over his assignments.

When Madelyn was satisfied that Homelander was going to actually do his work instead of trying to sneak in to see Sasha, she retreated down the hall to her own office. She had her desk computer set-up to do work, but used the laptop by its side to monitor the security cameras. To not only keep an eye on Homelander, but to make sure she could arrive promptly when Sasha woke up.

Part of Madelyn’s research this afternoon was simply to find out more about this girl she seemed to have found in her care. Nothing was really out of the usual. Information was largely hard to find, and what she did find was from Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and the like.

From all of the posts, and the few ‘real’ friends, she seemed positively normal. School records showed an average student. Not really shooting for the stars, but really just getting by. No extra curriculars. So, how the fuck did she end up on Homelander’s radar? It struck her odd that he’d never so much as breathed a word about this girl before fucking up as hard as he did. There’s no way that this wasn’t a planned strike. An alley where there had been only one camera, and even that wasn’t a good one? This whole fucking town had cameras on every god damn street corner; in every dark place and hidden secret. Everyone wanted to be the first to catch footage of Supes at work. That didn’t make any fucking sense. This was definitely something Homelander had planned, it had to be. He knew where she was going to be. This was a big goddamn town. Madelyn didn’t buy that Homelander found some random teenage girl at 2am on a Wednesday morning that was rapable. Absofuckinglutely not.

She then stumbled across something in her digital files that did strike her as interesting.

There was a file from Child Protective Services, a few odd years back. There had been a case where they temporarily removed Sasha from her parents for being willfully neglectful. The file said that she was dropped off at the Community Center and then completely forgotten there. A stranger by the name of John Doe had escorted her home safely, after which he had called CPS. John Doe. She couldn’t remember if that’s the last name Homelander used to use, but she doubted it. Despite that little bit of mismatched information, she was positive that the man who saved Sasha was Homelander.

“Jesus christ, John…” She murmured to herself, “She was only ten years old…” Thoughts of the worst filled her head. Would she need to put a red flag on him and watch him? Was he a danger to have around children, or was this just an odd case? The rest of the article only explained that Jack Lannister, her father, had improved their home and made strides to get custody back, and it was granted. Well, a whole lot of good that did, seeing as she still ended up in the arms of Homelander.

Madelyn leaned back in her leather chair and sighed, her eyes drifting toward the laptop monitor. Homelander was gone, but he wasn’t on any of her cameras, so he must actually have listened and went to do hero work. Heh, staged hero work, it was almost funny. She looked at Sasha’s room and realized that she was awake. The doctors weren’t in her room, why weren’t they in her room. She swore under her breath before rising from her desk and leaving her office. She walked briskly down the hall, her heels clicking impatiently against the dark marble floor. She rapped her knuckles lightly against the door before gently pushing it open, sticking her head inside and giving Sasha a warm smile, a real smile.

“Good to see you awake. You gave us quite a scare. How do you feel?” Madelyn asked, sliding into the room and shutting the door, locking it to make sure no one would interrupt them.

“I feel fine, but it’s probably…” Sasha murmured, raising her hand with the IV drip, “What ever the fuck is in here.” There was a deep pain in her words, though she did try to make light of the situation.

“Listen,” Madelyn began quietly, crossing the room and taking a seat in the cushioned chair beside the bed, “I know that I came off as cold and uncaring at your house and in my office, because I have to. The reputation of my heroes means more to me than anything else.” She explained, “But what Homelander did to you is not going to slide. Yes, we know who he is and what he’s capable of. You’re not going to have to worry about him hurting you like this for a while. Now, tell me, how do you really feel?”

“I feel like someone shot a railgun inside me.” Sasha answered honestly, leaning back against her pillow again. It wasn’t really an apology, but it was close. She guessed she could understand where Madelyn was coming from with all of this. She wasn’t pissed off at Sasha, she was pissed off at Homelander.

“Yeah… You’re going to feel like that until the stitches dissolve, I’m afraid. You’ve got about thirteen internal stitches right now. It will be about three weeks for those to be done healing up and dissolving. The doctors will check up on it every other week, but if you sense any changes or new discomfort, you let us know and they will look at it with no questions asked. You’ll need a month, ideally, two, to fully heal. At least, that’s what the Doctors told me earlier when I was here.”

“I don’t think Homelander is going to be happy with that.” Sasha sighed, looking down at her hands and picking at her cuticles. “I mean, he picked me up to be a sex toy. Now I can’t give him sex and I’m afraid of what else he might want.” She was hoping that Madelyn would correct her, that she was more than a toy, but she knew the reality wasn’t the case.

“Don’t let him be in control.” Madelyn stated then, “I know it’s hard, and I know it’s scary. I know he is frightening, I really do, but you need to protect yourself. Yeah, he might get violent from time to time. Myself and the doctors have told him that you need to heal before he can touch you like that again. He doesn’t like it, but he has agreed so far. I can almost promise he will only wait until the stitches are gone. Three months is too long for him.”

“I just assumed I’d die from this.” Sasha admitted honestly, “death might be better than staying like this.”

“It will smooth out, give it time. He’s not going to hurt you that badly again. Since last night, your face is everywhere. The photo of him kissing your forehead while you were wrapped in his cloak has gone viral. Everyone wants to know who you are. We can’t have you dying on us, that paints Homelander in a very bad light. Even if we said you were attacked or kidnapped by criminals, it makes him look bad for not saving you. You have an interview as soon as you feel up to it, on Good Morning America so that everyone can get to know you.”

“Get to know me?” Sasha questioned. She expected to have her photo everywhere, so that wasn’t a surprise. Madelyn making her well being completely business related wasn’t a shock either.

“Well, get to know the you that we’ve designed. There will be teleprompters and I’ll be there with you if you get stuck on something. We need to make sure you are the kind of girl the public wants to see Homelander with.” Madelyn said with a smile before standing up, “He’s going to want to speak with you when he gets back from his chores.”

“I figured as much. I’m a little surprised you were here before he was.” Sasha said, finally looking up from her hands again, “Thank you.”

Madelyn stopped at the door and froze, looking at the round bronze handle. She looked back at Sasha with sympathy in her eyes, “Don’t thank me. You’re going to be trapped in this hell for a very long time. Either until Homelander gets bored, or he does actually kill you by accident. He doesn’t know his own strength, and he has a temper.”

“I noticed.” Sasha agreed, remembering how he had slammed her down on the table, “Either way, thank you for stopping by, Madelyn. I appreciate you not allowing me to die, even if it is business related. I’ll do my best to stay alive.”

“I know you will.” Madelyn nodded before leaving the room.

Sasha was left largely on her own for the remainder of the afternoon. She had a remote that she could call for assistance, which was mostly requesting something to eat and to drink. There was a television with every channel and add-on imaginable, which was mostly able to occupy her time when she wasn’t sleeping from her pain medications. She worried that Homelander was furious with her for being so frail. Maybe that’s why he hadn’t come to see her yet. Did she even want to see him? God, she didn’t know. The idea of seeing him had her stomach tied into knots, but the idea of him avoiding her made her feel empty.

The sun had long since gone down outside her window, and the only lights in the room were from her monitors, and the television. She had the volume very low, barely above a whisper, so she could sleep through it if she did let sleep consume her again.

The door clicked then and she turned to look at her visitor. She had expected a doctor again, but it was Homelander. She sat upright and winced, placing a hand on her lower abdomen and taking a shaky breath.

“No, no.” He murmured, crossing toward her. He set the vase of flowers down on the table and placed his hands on her shoulders, gently laying her back on the bed, “You need to relax. Don’t be uncomfortable just because I’m here.” He said before sitting down and giving her a charming smile, “I brought you flowers.”

“Thank you…” Sasha murmured, turning to look at the warm, summer bouquet of vibrant flowers. They were like a rainbow, all sorts of shapes and colors. She wasn’t an expert on flowers, but it looked like roses and daffodils were there. “I love them.”

“I’m so sorry, Sasha.” He sighed, grabbing her tube-free hand bringing it to his mouth, brushing his lips against her knuckles like a feather, “I didn’t mean to be so rough with you. It’s just The Deep, he made me so-”

“It’s okay…” Sasha stopped him gently, closing her eyes, “The Doctors say I’ll make a full recovery with enough time. There will be scars, but no one is going to see them. They said that no one will… Will feel them, either.”

“That’s the least of my concern.” He said dismissively, “God, this is exactly what I wanted to protect you from when I first saw you in the rain…” He sighed quietly, stroking her hair gently with a gloved hand.

“Rain…?” Sasha asked curiously. It hadn’t been raining in the alley. “Wait… When we met in the Alley,” Met, she thought, That’s putting it lightly. “ That wasn’t the first time you and I have met… Is it?”

“No.” He shook his head. “It’s not. Do you really not remember the first time we met?” He inquired, looking a little hurt. He shouldn’t be surprised. She was so young when she first met him.

“I’m certain I’d have remembered meeting Homelander-” She began

“I wasn’t Homelander when we met.” He corrected her. “I was just John then… That was before I gave up on having a secret identity to still attempt to be normal. I was needed much too often to ever be able to do anything like anyone else. Here, let me tell you what I remember, and we will see if you remember, too.” He suggested.

“Okay.” Sasha agreed, using the remote to mute the TV before focusing her attention on him.

“Well, let’s see…” He sighed. “It was, oh, probably a few years ago now. You were on Elm street, I think. I don’t remember that for sure, but it was dark, it was October, and it was raining.”

Sasha had been waiting patiently for her parents to pick her up from the Community Center for over three hours. A friend's mom had given her a ride there after school for a Halloween event they were having. The event had ended at five PM, and it was now after eight. Everyone had been picked up by their parents, everyone except Sasha. She kept trying to call them, but there were no replies on either phone. It wasn’t late, but it was dark and raining. She didn’t have her coat because she had forgotten it in her locker at school. The center was getting ready to close, and she was growing more uncomfortable as the staff continued to ask when her parents would show up to take her home. She lied to them, of course, saying her parents were just caught up in something, but they would come to get her.

She waited for an opening, when the employees were all out of sight, to slip outside into the darkness. It was almost nine now and she couldn’t wait for them any longer. She knew how to get home, and it was only three miles away. Three miles would be an easy walk. She just wished it wasn’t cold and dark.

She wrapped her thin arms around herself protectively and walked into the rain, quickly disappearing from sight and into the darkness. She was very careful to stay on the sidewalk and be aware of her surroundings. No one else was really out here, of course not, it was late and it was cold. No one else would be so stupid as to be out here. Not that she had much of a choice.

It didn’t take long until her pink T-shirt and blue jeans were completely soaked through, her socks and shoes too. Her black hair was plastered down to her face and her shoulders. The chill shook her and gave her skin goosebumps. It had only been two blocks and she was now severely regretting the decision she had made to be out here.

The cold clouded her judgment and made it hard to focus on anything other than getting safely home. She stepped into the street only to hear the blair of a car horn. She looked up to see headlights and raised her arms over her face, as if that would protect her from the car.

She felt hands on her sides, pulling her. She moved as if she had weighed nothing. The car screeched by, splashing her. She lowered her arms and looked up to see a man. Her heart began to beat quickly. She hadn’t heard him. How was he close enough to save her if she didn’t even know he was there? The cold must have distracted her more than she thought.

“Are you alright?” He questioned, pulling her quickly to the sidewalk before kneeling down, holding his umbrella over both of them.

“I am. Thank you, Mister.” She said softly, wiping her hair back with a trembling hand.

“Why are you out here by yourself? Where are your parents? Where is your coat?”

“I don’t know. They were supposed to pick me up, but I think they might have forgotten… and I forgot my coat at school” She murmured sheepishly, ashamed of her parents and herself.

“How could parents forget a child?” He sighed before handing her the umbrella, “Hold this for me, will you?”

“Okay…” She agreed, taking the umbrella in both hands. It was very big and heavy. She did her best not to drop it, Though it did waver. He gripped the back of his sweatshirt and pulled it off over his head. He took the umbrella from her and handed her the sweater, “You put that on so you don’t catch a cold. I’m going to walk with you, okay? You shouldn’t be out here alone.”

“Teacher says I’m not supposed to trust strangers.” She murmured quietly, putting his sweater on despite what he just said. It was warm, dry, and smelled vaguely of Cedar.

“Your teacher is smart to tell you that.” He smiled, offering her his free hand, “My name is John, and yours is..?”

“My name is Sasha…” She said shyly, taking his hand. He shook her hand and smiled.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sasha. Now that we aren’t strangers, may I walk you home? I’d feel a lot better if I knew you got there, safe and sound. Especially with this weather we are having.”

“Okay.” She agreed. He stood up and took her hand, but didn’t get more than a dozen steps before stopping.

“Would you like to be carried? I don’t know how far we need to go, but you are certainly small enough to be carried.”

“Oh.. I don’t… I don’t know…” She said uncomfortably, digging the toe of her shoe into the cement, not looking up at him.

“If you change your mind, let me know.” He offered before walking again. They made it about a mile into the three mile walk before she needed to stop. Her feet were very cold and wet, but they still hurt from the walking.

“Will you carry me?” She asked quietly. She expected him to say no, like her parents always had, but he didn’t. He only bent down to pick her up, resting her comfortably on his hip, her legs wrapped around his waist. His arm was beneath her rear to support her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and only held on. He was warm and he made her feel safe. He continued walking, asking her questions about school and her friends. However, each time he asked about her parents or any siblings, she would shy away from the question and talk about something else.

When they arrived, he walked her up to the door and set her down on the porch, out of the wind and rain.

“Here we are, safe and sound.” He smiled, closing his umbrella. “Are your parents home? I sure would like to talk to them.” This was a lie, but a flawless lie to tell a child. Really, he wanted to murder them both in the rain and adopt this child for his own. He knew murder wasn’t the best option, but how could parents be so careless with such a gift.

“They’re home.” Sasha nodded her head, turning and reaching for the door handle, but she paused, then turned back to him. “Thank you for taking me home. My parents are probably asleep.” She said sadly, “And if they are awake, they’ll be really mad at me for letting a stranger walk me home. I don’t want to get in trouble.”

“Oh, yes, of course not. We wouldn’t want you in trouble.” He agreed, placing a warm hand on her head, just for a moment, “You be well and stay out of trouble. I don’t want to find you out in the rain again, understand?”

“Yes sir.” She agreed before disappearing quickly into the house, locking the door behind her.

Both of her parents were awake, watching television in the living room which was right beside the entryway. Neither of them even looked up as she entered the home. She didn’t say anything to them, only went up to her room to warm up in the shower, put pajamas on, and go to bed.

“...I called Child Protective Services that night, and you were removed in the morning.” He continued, “I managed to keep you away from them for almost a year. I kept my eyes on you to make sure that your foster family was kind, and they were very kind. I wanted them to adopt you. I wanted to adopt you, but, obviously, Vought wasn’t going to allow that.”

“I…” Sasha choked softly, “I was ten years old…” With that, the sound that left her sounded almost inhuman. It was a deep wail of anguish and her heart felt as though it might explode. “S-six years. You’ve been watching me for six fucking years!” She shouted, tears streaming down her face. She sobbed, struggling to breathe. The motions were stirring her and causing her injury to hurt. She gasped in pain and placed her hand on her abdomen before laying back against the bed, screaming in agony.

“Sasha, please…” He tried to soothe her, standing up and leaning over her, stroking her hair tenderly. He understood why she was upset, of course she was upset, “It wasn’t about sex. I promise you that It wasn’t about sex, not back then. It wasn’t about me having you. It was about me keeping you safe.”

“Wh-what did you see?” She sobbed, unable to bring herself to look at him. Her eyes were closed tightly. She knew he was over her. She could feel his warmth, and his hand on her hair.

“A lot… I saw how your parents treated you, how bullies at school tried to treat you… Well, until they were asked not to.” He tried to explain, “All I wanted to do was keep you safe. I did keep you safe!” He tried to reassure her, growing more frantic to do so, “I kept you as safe as I could without getting too close or being seen. I’d watch over you at night every chance I could. I loved your posters of me, and how you looked up to Homelander. It made me feel like you knew. Knew that I was watching over you.”

“S-six years…” She sobbed softly, her hands still on her throbbing abdomen. “W-when did it become about sex? When did you decide the best option was to rape me!”

“When I saw you on your knees… In the Alley…” He breathed, though his voice did tremble. She opened her eyes to look up at him, and there was sorrow, and deep regret on his face.

“N-no…” She whispered, shaking her head.

“Yes.” He nodded assuringly, “I really only meant to protect you. I meant to protect you, and to offer you a job here at Vought so you could live in the tower. So I could watch you, and protect you… But then I remembered…” He drifted sadly, forcing a smile and cupping her cheek gently in his hand, “I shouldn’t have-”

“You remembered what…?” She demanded through clenched teeth, “What did you remember that made you do that?”

“I remembered how you sound when you moan my name…” He said before moaning, “Homelander.”

“N-no…” She whimpered, her lip quivering, “Y-you watched me… You watched me without me knowing. When… I-I thought I was by myself in my room… Y-you watched me when I touched myself at night.” She sobbed.

“I did. I’m sorry. I did. I liked it. I didn’t think of it sexually, I didn’t. I felt pride because you felt so safe and comfortable with me, even if it was just the idea of me. I wanted you to feel safe with me again. I hoped you would.” He explained, looking at her hands on her abdomen, “But that dream is dead now…” He cleared his throat and his tone changed.

He was almost human to her for a moment. The emotions he expressed. The grief and sorrow she knew he felt. He was almost like everyone else, but now Homelander was back, not John. “I know you’ll never feel safe with me again. Nor should you.” He agreed before kissing her forehead, “Go to bed. I’ll be back tomorrow.” He said coldly before leaving the room and closing the door. 

There was only silence now, except for the hum of the monitors. The room flashed vaguely as the pictures on the TV continued moving though they could not be heard.

Six years… He’d stalked her for six years. It was never a coincidence he found her in that alley. He was just waiting for the right moment to show up to her again, as a hero this time, not a mere man. This was a calculated attack.

She was always being watched.

Always.

Chapter Text

Madelyn had been watching from her office. She turned the volume up for the room when she saw Homelander was in there with Sasha, and she was screaming. The things he said made a lot of sense. She remembered all of this when it happened. He was so distracted for months. No one could figure out why. He was so secretive about it. Was it really because he wanted to protect and adopt a child? More importantly, why hadn’t he come to her with that information? If anyone here was actually going to help him do it, it would be her. She wouldn’t have helped, of course. Their number one hero couldn’t be distracted by something as trivial as parenthood. They were going to need to have a conversation about all of this. She wasn’t quite sure how she wanted to approach the subject with him, but she wasn’t going to have the time to think about it.

“Come in, Homelander.” Madelyn called, not looking up from her laptop. She didn’t need to. One of the cameras was outside of her office, and she could see him watching her through the wall.

He did as instructed and came inside, sitting down on her couch, careful to move his cape to the side. He didn’t say anything and he didn’t look at her. He looked angry, or maybe just frustrated. There was a deep breath that he let out through his nostrils and closed his eyes.

“How much did you hear?” He questioned. He wasn’t an idiot, he knew that he and Sasha were going to be heavily monitored. He knew that even before he broke her. It would only be worse now. He knew they were going to be careful not to let him get carried away, well, at least they’d be able to say they tried. The cold reality is that if he were to kill her, or try to, they’d all be powerless to stop him.

“All of it.” Madelyn sighed softly, “Six years is a long time, John…” She said lovingly, shaking her head, “What on earth were you thinking?” She hit a button on her keyboard to record the rest of their conversation, and then flipped the screen down. She got up and walked to him, sitting beside him on the white leather. “What did you possibly hope to gain from stalking her?” She had so many more questions she wanted to ask. She was legitimately concerned that their number one Hero was some sort of pedophile. That would hurt Vought’s image more than anything else in the world could. She wanted to make sure he wasn’t dangerous, well, not that kind of dangerous.

“I wasn’t…” He growled before letting out air through his nose to calm down, “I wasn’t stalking her. It wasn’t constant, just as often as I could spare.” He knew she wouldn’t be satisfied by anything he had to say. He had hoped no one would ever find out about Sasha.

“Why did you do it?” She asked again, her tone still gentle.

“Because her parents didn’t love her. They don’t love her.” He took a deep breath. He was fidgeting. His fingers wouldn’t hold still and his leg was bouncing slightly. “I knew how she felt, to be neglected and longing for the love of a parent. I yearned to give her the love I had never felt as a child.” He explained, his voice stable though there was discomfort on his face. He meant what he said. He only wanted to be a father to her. He wanted to be a father so badly then.

“I don’t think she appreciates your love, John. Of course, your love comes with contracts and hospital stays.” She reminded him. The words stung, but she was mindful of her tone, “She’s still going to listen to you. I talked to her briefly yesterday. She’s not going to try anything stupid like an escape.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt her… I forgot she was so fragile, and that I’m so strong. All of me is strong. I know to be more careful now, not to get carried away. That wasn’t the kind of love I wanted to give her!” He shouted suddenly, leaning forward and slamming his fists down on her wooden coffee table. It shattered into splinters on the ground at their feet. She flinched, but just barely. She understood his anger and just wanted to make sure she kept it from being aimed in her direction.

“What kind of love did you want to give her?” She urged gently, reaching over and placing a warm hand on his knee. “Let me know what you had in mind.”

“I wanted to be her father.” He stated bluntly before sighing, placing his hand on hers, but only for a moment before removing it,  “I wanted to love her like she was my own. I wanted her to feel safe and protected. I wanted her to rely on me and hide behind me like the impenetrable object I am. I wanted to keep this ugly world away from her… But I brought the ugliness of it with me, and put it inside of her.”

“Quite literally, actually.” Madelyn added. He turned and glared at her with his jaw clenched, but he did not say anything. “What are you going to do now, since your option to be her father is no longer even a remote possibility? The press wants a girlfriend, not an adopted daughter. From what you both said that night, though brief, the Paparazzi has run with. No one will believe she’s your child, and if they do, they’ll all assume your’e sodomizing her. We can’t have that.”

“Once she has healed, we will go public with our relationship and-” He started. He’d thought about this a lot. He figured that, in three weeks time it would take for her to heal, he could talk to her and try to earn back some of the trust he so willfully shattered. He could show her that he’s not the monster he’s started as. His heart hurt deeply to think that she was afraid of him. He was the symbol of home. The idea of a fan who had looked up to him, now being terrified by his name, was painful. It was the most pain he’d felt since he was a child.

“You don’t have that long.” Madelyn corrected, “Her interview is as soon as she can stand to get out of that bed. We can’t wait three weeks to unveil her to the world.”

“Won’t that kind of stress be hard on her recovery?” He murmured, finally sitting up straight, his hands returning to his knees.

“It will be, but there’s nothing we can do about that now.” Madelyn shrugged, “As long as you can manage to keep your hands off of her while she heals, it won’t take as long.”

“I wouldn’t dream of touching her until she’s healed. The injury is bad enough as it is. I won’t make it worse. I don’t want her to hurt because of me. I’m supposed to make her feel secure, not frightened.”

“I’m sure she’ll come around, with enough time. It’s not like she has a choice.” She said before adding, “Why didn’t you ask me for help when you wanted to adopt her?”

“Really?” He scoffed, “You and I both know you never would have helped me. I either did it alone, or I didn’t do it at all.”

“You’re right. I wouldn’t have helped, because it was an idiotic idea. Just look at the mess you are in. It all could have been avoided if you had just kept those urges of yours in check.”

“Yes ma’am…” He agreed through clenched teeth. “Is that all? I’d like to get some sleep.”

“Yes… That’s all.” She sighed before getting up and going back to her desk. She sat down and opened the computer again, shutting down the recording.

Homelander didn’t say anything else, but only left her office in silence, closing the door behind himself. He walked down the hall and stopped at her room, opening the door. He stepped inside and closed it. He felt guilty that she was given this nice room, and then didn’t even get a chance to sleep in it before being immediately confined to a hospital room. He crossed the room and sat on her bed, taking off his gloves to splay his fingers over her blankets. He laid down on the bed and rested against her pillow. It smelled like her, sweet and vaguely floral. With that, he fell asleep.

The next three days passed with ease. Sasha was healing well, and the pain went down significantly after the first day. She could do most things, like using the restroom and showering, by herself with minimal pain and discomfort. Madelyn had Sasha listen to the recording that was made, but it was all so difficult to process. Was it really her fault that he went from being a father figure to a lover? She used ‘lover’ in the most loose sense of the term. She didn’t mean for that to happen. She didn’t know he was always watching. Even if she had known, she wouldn’t have known why.

Though Madelyn had made a point to visit, Homelander never did. He hadn’t come to see her since he left that first day. She was worried that he was furious with her. That he didn’t want to see her now that she was broken. That she wasn’t even worth his time.

Sasha was sitting up in her bed, sipping her water while watching the television when the door opened. She turned slightly and saw Madelyn enter, with another woman who was wearing a headset and holding a clipboard.

“Sasha, meet Venus. Venus is going to be your new Public Relations agent.” Madelyn said with a bright smile, “She’s who you will contact about all of your interviews, public outings, social media posts, the works.” She explained with that same professional smile that Sasha was learning to loathe, “Your first interview is today, Venus will fill you in on what we have scripted for you.”

“Oh.. Okay, yeah, sure. Nice to meet you.” Sasha nodded softly, setting her cup down on the nightstand.

“The pleasure is mine. I’m looking forward to working so closely with you and Homelander during this time of relationship development for the public.” Venus smiled before sitting in the chair beside the bed, and handing Sasha a stapled sheet of paper. “So, your interview is this afternoon, in about four hours. We just want you to take a look at all of this, so you kind of know what kind of girl you should present yourself as. Do you have any questions about that?”

“None.” Sasha agreed, taking the papers and looking down at them.

“Really…? No questions at all?” Venus asked, a little astounded.

“Listen, I’ve only seen behind the curtain for a few days, but I get it. Everything this goddamn company feeds to the public is a lie. Why would I be any different? I’ll follow your guides, and I’ll read the teleprompters. I don’t want this to be any more of a mess than it already is.”

“Wow. Um. Great! Yeah!” Venus said excitedly, looking down at her own copy, “So, let's begin.”

They spent the better part of the next two hours going over the sheets. Sasha didn’t like them, or really even agree with them. Their idea of a woman for Homelander was so much different than her own, and anyone she’d ever talked to about it. Most of those conversations had been with other teen girls, but still. This is really who she was going to need to be now, as long as the cameras were rolling.

Once Sasha was out of bed, she was escorted by two large bodyguards into a black SUV. Madelyn was in the car with her, and gave her a very brief rundown of the events. They were going to be on The Today Show, with Hostess Patricia Donovan. Patricia was going to have a list of general questions, and then some a little more intimate. She wasn’t sure exactly what the network was going to want, so Madelyn couldn’t get a copy of the questions beforehand, not that it mattered. One of their PR agents would be at the computer, controlling the teleprompter for her, letting her know what to say and how to say it. All Sasha had to do was follow the instructions laid out for her. Seemed easy enough.

Sasha was escorted to a dressing room, where Venus helped her into a white sundress. The hem was flowy and reached mid-way down her calves. The shirt was a V-cut, but not deep enough to show any cleavage. The sleeves covered her shoulders and went mid way down her forearms, just enough to cover what was left of her healing bruises. There were white flats for her to wear with the dress.

Once she was clothed, the make-up specialists from the network came in to do her face and her hair. Her hair was braided and tied up neatly, almost like a bride to be. The makeup was faint, just enough to look good for the camera, but not distract from the natural beauty of her face. Her stitches hurt from all of the moving, but she knew that, in just a few more minutes, she’d be able to sit down and not move for the better part of an hour. Just had to get through all of the prepwork first.

“Are you ready, Sasha? We are on in five.” Madelyn said hurriedly when she entered the room. She pulled Sasha to her feet and led her from the dressing rooms and toward the stage. Sasha could see all of the people seated to watch this in person and it made her feel sick. She forgot real people would be here, too. Real people who would be able to see the discomfort that perhaps the television could hide.

She could see Patricia also, sitting on her gray leather chair. She wore a nice suit top and pencil skirt, both a deep navy blue. Her lipstick would match a fire truck. All of the make up seemed over the top, but of course, that’s how she’d look best on Television. Her brown hair was wavy and framed her slender face well.

“Are you nervous?” Madelyn asked quietly as they stood backstage, waiting to be announced and brought on stage. Sasha looked over at Madelyn, not realizing how she’d zoned out.

“I…” Sasha started, looking across the stage into the darkness of the otherside. She could see Homelander there and her blood ran cold. It was the first time she’d seen him since he’d admitted to stalking her. He raised a hand to give her a small wave and a reassuring smile. He could feel her heart rate increase, and he knew that it was because of him.

“Yes…” She murmured, “I’m very nervous.”

“That’s alright. We are here. We will make sure it goes fine. I’ll be right there beside you.” Madelyn assured her.

“Good. I don’t-” Sasha started

“Actually, Miss Stillwell..” One of the stage hands interjected, looking very uncomfortable, “Didn’t you get the update? The network wants Sasha to come out alone. They really want to get to know her without any outside influence. You can stay right here on the edge of the stage, but you’re not supposed to go up with her.”

“Excuse you?” Madelyn asked, flabbergasted, “I’ll go speak with the head of the network. Wait right here.” Madelyn urged before taking out her phone and walking off hurriedly.

“She can try, but you go on in one minute.” The stage hand murmured to Sasha, “You okay knowing you have to go alone?”

“I don’t have a choice, do I?” Sasha responded with a timid smile. She went to brush her hair back from her face only to remember it was all tied back. “The show must go on.”

She watched and waited for the countdown signal, and walked out on the stage as soon as Miss Donovan had announced her. Madelyn wasn’t with her. No one was. She caught a brief glimpse of Homelander, whose face was hard and she could tell he was furious. God, he wasn’t mad at her, was he? Please, no. She didn’t want him to be angry with her. This was the first time she’d seen him in days and he was livid. It made her want to cry.

Sasha took a seat and crossed her ankles respectfully before straightening out her skirt and offering a warm smile to Patricia, “Good afternoon, Miss Donovan, It’s a pleasure to have been invited on the show today. Never thought I’d be on Television.” She said, reading the teleprompter over Patricia’s shoulder.

“Oh, Patricia, please.” Patricia smiled, offering a hand to shake with Sasha, “We are ecstatic to have you on the show today. I’m sure you know why you’re here. Shall we dive right into it?”

“Absolutely.” Sasha smiled after shaking the woman’s hand, putting her hand back on her lap. She frowned, but just slightly, as the teleprompter flashed and went out. Her heart began to race. How was she supposed to answer these questions if she didn’t know what she was going to say? Patricia put a finger to her ear to listen to the small headset and nodded her head slowly.

“Well, it looks like we are experiencing some technical difficulties, so you folks are going to get a very special show today!” Patricia laughed heartily, facing toward the crowd, “Seems our Teleprompter system has shut down, so everything you are going to hear today is raw and unscripted!”

This received an uproar of applause from the audience. Sasha couldn’t feel her legs, and her heart was pounding. She looked at Homelander who had gone from anger to worry.  It was as if he felt afraid for her, or maybe it was just for his reputation. She wanted to cry out for him. Beg him to come save her, but she knew she couldn’t do that. Everyone would have questions if she did that.

He could hear her heartbeat quickening. He didn’t know what he could do to help, if he could do anything. Surely no one would stop him from joining her on the stage. A special guest appearance from Homelander himself. The crowd would eat it up. Would that be better or worse for their reputation? He didn’t know and Madelyn was still on the goddamn phone at the other side of the stage.

“Alright. First question, because I know we are all dying to hear the story. This photo here.” Patricia motioned a slender hand to the wall to her right, just as the photo of Homelander kissing Sasha’s forehead popped up. This received another round of applause from the audience, “How long have you and Homelander been seeing each other?”

“Oh, gosh…” Sasha murmured before letting out an uncomfortable laugh, “A few months. We went on several dates before this. He’s a proper gentleman, really. He always made sure I got home safe.” She smiled, this was followed by a loud ‘aw’ from the audience.

Homelander disappeared from her sight then, crossing behind the set to find Madelyn, who was just hanging up her phone.

“What the hell is going on here?” He said quietly, so others wouldn’t hear him.

“The network producer knows how we operate.” She said as a low growl, “They wanted honesty and nothing staged. That’s why they wouldn’t let you or I go with her, and they blacked out the teleprompters. Fucking assholes.” She snapped, crossing her arms and angrily glaring at the hostess. 

“What does that mean for Sasha?” He questioned quietly, trying not to draw attention to their conversation.

“Means she better not fuck up. Hope she remembered everything we gave her.” She sighed, “We just… wait and hope for the best.”

“How did you meet Homelander? Obviously, as the world's number one hero, he is quite the busy man. How did you two click? Was it instant?” Patricia asked with that same, plastic smile on her face. Sasha wanted to slap it right off of her.

“Well, I didn’t meet him as Homelander.” Sasha giggled as authentically as she could muster, looking down at her hands. It was easier to lie without making eye contact. She hated herself for how she was behaving, but she knew it was needed. Before now, she’d never have thought of herself as an actress in any sense of the word. She had only dreamed of it without the option to try. This was her second chance to act and she couldn’t fail.

She knew she needed to believe what she was saying, or no one else would. Someone better give her a goddamn Oscar after this was all over if everyone’s reputation survived unscathed. “I met him when I was on my way home from Church. I’m a little more devout than my parents. They’ll attend with me sometimes, but certainly not every Sunday.” She began explaining.

“No, no…” Madelyn groaned, “This isn’t what we told her.” She whispered with venom on every word.

“Just… Wait…” Homelander murmured, pointing toward the crowd. Many women with their hands on their hearts as if they witnessed a puppy being born, and men nodding with approval, “They love it…”

“... I met him and he was just like any other man I’d met, except he was exceptionally kind.” She said, pushing back the memories of him slamming her head against a table before raping a hole into her not even a week ago. She needed to ignore that, at least for now. “He was charming and asked if he could escort me home. I thanked him for his kindness, though I was nervous. The idea of a strange man, though handsome, knowing where I lived certainly wasn’t the safest idea. There was just something about him that I trusted.” ‘If your mouth is good enough, that’s all I’ll ask for’ she heard Homelander’s voice in her head, but she buried it back down again. “Once I got home, I thought that would be the end of it… But he asked if he could take me out to dinner and I said yes. That was the first of dozens of dates.”

“The first of dozens, really?” Patricia asked, giving an almost naughty, sultry look, which caused an ‘ooo’ from the audience. “How long into the relationship did he wait to tell you he was Homelander?”

“I found out only shortly before you all found out about me.” Sasha laughed, motioning with one hand toward the picture that was still behind them. “He waited about four months to tell me he was Homelander. I feel silly, I was never even suspicious. He told me he had a very important job and wasn’t able to discuss it. I just assumed he was with the CIA or the FBI, or something like that. I didn’t expect him to say ‘I’m Homelander of The Seven’.” Sasha giggled softly before shaking her head, “Looking back, it is really silly that I didn’t put the pieces together.”

“Oh, don’t be so modest! I don’t think anyone would assume that their new boyfriend is one of The Seven, no matter what the evidence states!” Patricia teased with another theatrical laugh. Oh, this bitch made every fiber of Sasha’s being crawl with rage and disgust.

          That fucking laugh. That fake, forced, made-for-TV laugh stabbed into Sasha like a hot knife through butter. The blade twisted and made the wound fresh every time this awful woman began laughing again. Would she laugh if she knew Sasha had thirteen unseen stitches due to their beloved Homelander? Would she still laugh if there had been video footage of what Homelander did to her in the alley? Well, footage they could get, anyway. Madelyn seemed to have the only copy, and even hers didn't show much.

          "While we have you, I must get to this question or the fans will never forgive me." Patricia smiled before leaning in and looking devious. "So. The question that is undoubtedly on everyone's mind…" she spoke softly, but the words were loud because of the microphone clipped to her shirt. "...Is what Homelander is like in bed?"

         "I…" Sasha froze and her voice cracked. She could feel the blush starting across her face. What kind of lover was he? What kind of lover did they think he was? The truth wasn't a viable option. Fuck. She quickly covered her face and began to giggle nervously before shaking her head. She had to giggle, if she didn’t laugh, she’d burst into tears. Tears were definitely not the best option. She lowered her trembling hands back down to her lap and gave Patricia an apologetic smile.

         "I'm so sorry. This is going to be such a disappointment, but I actually don't know." Sasha said with another nervous laugh, "it's actually not something we've even talked about. We haven't even done more than just… Well, just kissing, really. He'll hold my hand but that's… oh! Wait! He slid his hand up my shirt once!"

         "What the fuck does she think she's doing?" Madelyn growled softly, "This doesn't paint a good light."

          "Yes it does." Homelander disagreed, "if she said I'd never said or done anything, we'd lose popularity with men. I mean, look at her. She's gorgeous. Of course I couldn't be a perfect boy scout."

          "He did!" Patricia gasped, "and what was that like?' She asked eagerly.

          "His hands are soft and warm. Comforting. He stopped at my belly, not going any higher than that but it still gave me chills and butterflies."

“I have to do something.” Homelander said hurriedly to Madelyn, “She’s going to crack if Patricia keeps this up. She’s going to keep pushing as long as we leave her alone. I don’t know how long she can keep pretending like this.”

“You’re right…” Madelyn agreed reluctantly, chewing on her thumb nail with her other arm crossed across her chest. “You’re good on camera with or without a script. Do what you feel works. I’ll deal with corporate later.” She agreed with a firm nod of her head.

“Understood.” Homelander agreed before walking away, striking his heroic stride before reaching the edge of the stage where the lights finally hit him. “Good afternoon, ladies, mind if I join you?” He said with a dashing smile, offering a wink to Sasha. He wished at that moment that he could be telepathic. He wanted to let her know that she was safe, and that he was there to save her and ease her burden. He wasn’t mad at her and he wasn’t going to hurt her or scold her. He was going to save her, no matter the cost.

“Oh…” Patricia looked momentarily displeased, but it was replaced with a smile when the voice in her ear confirmed she could let him stay. “Of course! What a treat, everyone. Please, welcome Homelander!”

The crowd exploded into cheers and applause for Homelander. He crossed the stage, bowing and waving and being just as picture perfect as he’d always been. He held his cape to the side and sat down beside Sasha. She reached over instantly to grab his hand, squeezing and holding. Relief washed over her. Her hero was here to save her. Thank fucking Christ she wouldn’t have to do this alone anymore. The relief made her want to cry again. He turned his hand to be palm up and twined his fingers with hers, which caused another explosive response from the audience. She was praying he didn’t come out here because Madelyn was pissed at the answers she had been giving. Being tense made her insides hurt and the last thing she wanted was to be verbally assaulted after all this.

He could feel that she was thankful, and that she knew he was there to help, not hurt. His heart swelled with a sort of pride, knowing that she wanted him here for her. That she wanted to hold him and rely on him. Fuck, that was all he wanted. Her love and adoration. To be needed by her.

“So, do you mind if we continue with these personal questions?” Patricia asked with a playfully raised eyebrow.

“Go right ahead. We’ve got nothing to hide from you kind people.” He spoke and his voice was so booming that he did not need a microphone. It sent a chill down Sasha’s spine, but she gripped his hand more tightly. He was the only anchor keeping her sane now.

“Well, as she’s said, you certainly haven’t had…” She paused, listening for direction from her earpiece, “Intimate adult relations yet. Now, in today’s world, four months is more than enough time to get down to business. What has you holding off? Is it your dangerous job with The Seven, or something else?”

“Well,” Homelander started, looking down at Sasha. She was still smiling, but he could tell she hated every moment of this. He wanted to call Patricia a cheating bitch, considering she was still receiving direction without the teleprompters. “It’s certainly not because I don’t want to.” Which caused the crowd to gasp, and several women to cheer.

“What is he doing?” Madelyn groaned to herself, regretting letting him go out there.

“I mean, god, look at her.” Homelander smiled, squeezing her hand before leaning over to kiss her temple, “However, I love her.” The room fell silent at this and he continued, “Yes, I know that must be very surprising, but it is true. I fell in love with her the moment I first saw her. I tried to keep her out of the public eye to keep her safe.” This was all true. Painfully true, actually.

“What’s stopping you?” Patricia pushed more forcefully, looking at Sasha, “It couldn’t be that… Well, you don’t want to?”

“I don’t want to.” Sasha said in a quiet voice before looking up at Homelander, praying she wasn’t going to see that furious look on his face. “Not yet, anyway.” She said before looking back at Patricia. “I know it’s pretty outdated and out of fashion, but I really want to keep my virtue for my future husband. Right now, I belong to god, and I’ll belong to him until I have a husband. It’s much too early to know if that husband is going to be Homelander or not.”

“Wow. That’s impressive. I think I speak for most women when I say that Homelander is as close to a god as we’ve ever seen, and that makes us all weak in the knees.” Patricia laughed again. Sasha closed her eyes for a moment to try and keep the tears inside. That fucking laugh. It hurts every single time.

“And that is why I’m with Sasha.” Homelander interjected, cutting off the laughter when he felt Sasha tense up again. “I think that we all agree that a man seen as a god…” He said before looking down at Sasha again. “Deserves a woman to give him a run for his money.” He meant it as he looked down at her. He meant everything he had said. She was giving him a run for his money, just, not in the way they said. He did love her. He had loved her for years.

Sasha opened her glossy eyes and smiled before looking up at Homelander, her lip quivering slightly, “You’re going to make me cry on stage if you keep that up.” She tried to force a laugh. It was getting harder and harder to keep up this act. God, she hoped it was almost over. She needed it to be over.

“If you cry, I’ll just have to kiss away the tears.” He smiled, reaching up to cup her cheek to reassure her. The crowd was still making noise and they were in awe of how adorable this relationship was.

“Alright folks, it looks like we are out of time today! Please give another round of applause for Homelander and Sasha. Thank you both so much for being here with us today and giving us a glimpse inside of your relationship.” Patricia stood and shook both of their hands, or tried to. Homelander stood and shook her hand before looking down at Sasha. She was frozen in her seat, she still couldn’t feel her legs. Homelander leaned down and gently slid his arms beneath her, scooping her flawlessly into his arms bridal style and taking her off of the stage. He didn’t walk too quickly. He didn’t want to appear eager to leave even though he was. The crowd went wild when he picked her up. She wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head against his chest. She began to cry softly once her face was hidden against him and she finally felt relief that this was over.

Once they were safely backstage and in the dressing room out of sight, Homelander set Sasha down gently in a soft, blue cushioned chair. He brushed her hair back from her face and wiped the tears off of her face, doing his best to gently clean her up as he looked down at her. God, she was really so fucking beautiful.

“You did so good.” He whispered, stroking her hair gently with his gloved hand. “God, Sasha, you did so good. I’m so proud of you. That was so much to ask of you and those jackasses just kept making it worse. You really surprised us in the best way.”

“It hurts…” She finally whimpered, tears starting to roll down her cheeks more freely, placing her hand on her abdomen again. “I… I was so tense, it hurts… It’s throbbing and I.. I thought my heart was going to explode, or I was going to pass out.” She started sobbing now that it was safe, but wincing as she did, clutching the arm of the chair with her free hand with white knuckles, “O-ow…”

“Shh…” He cooed gently, standing up and leaning over her, “Come on, breathe with me.” He said before taking a slow breath in, and letting it out. Sasha looked up at his face and copied his breathing until the tears stopped and her insides went back to a dull throb instead of a hot iron. She closed her eyes and tried to steady herself, moving one hand to grip his, squeezing tightly before opening her eyes again.

“Please don’t make me do something like that alone again.” She pleaded softly, “I need you there with me if they are going to ask those questions.”

“You…” He smiled. “You want me with you?” There was disbelief in his voice.

“Yes, please.” She whimpered, still holding his hand. “I’d really like to go home, and I don’t want to sleep in that fucking hospital room anymore. I hate it there. I want to sleep in my own bed, with my things. I want to feel your arms wrapped around me. I just want to feel safe… Just for a little while.”

“I promise I’ll keep you safe. Let’s go home and get you to bed.” He assured her, standing up straight and kissing her on the head again. Oh, this was perfect. This was everything he wanted from her.

Chapter Text

putting this here because so many people have subscribed.

This is an older work of mine, so I'm going through and editing the quality of all previous chapters & will hopefully be posting the next chapter soon.

Thanks

Chapter Text

Homelander helped Sasha out of her chair as carefully as possible. He could feel how much pain she was in. He led her outside where they were nearly stormed by Paparazzi once more. He growled to himself and that urge to incinerate them crossed his mind again, but he made himself smile. He simply grabbed his cape and shielded as much of her with it as he possibly could as they went back to that black SUV. He opened the door and helped her in before sliding in beside her, slamming the door shut behind himself. He let out a heavy sigh and his smile faded and his jaw tightened.

“These fucking vultures…” He muttered to himself bitterly. At least they didn’t seem to suspect anything. None of the questions he had heard had anything to do with her injuries. Just the regular tabloid shit. He normally loved the limelight, but not like this. Not when it caused so much discomfort for his companion. Hopefully it will get easier for her.

         She kept quiet for the entirety of the drive home and simply tried to focus on making herself breathe and relax. The plush leather seats were infinitely more comfortable than the stage or dressing room chairs had been.

Forcing herself to relax, praying that the pain inside would subside sooner than later.. Homelander even humored her by sitting in the back of the Black SUV with her. He could have simply flown back to their 'home'. Left her to follow Madelyn and their guards down into the garage, where they would then have to dodge paparazzi trying to snag photos through the heavily tinted windows. He could have, but he didn't. He made sure her trip to the car was as quick and painless as he could, even dealing with the photographers for her. He didn’t make her smile or pose for anything. He had shielded her with his cape. This was not lost on her.

        He was more than content to allow her to cling to him like this. Curled against his side. Her arms wrapped around him tightly like she might just be sucked down by an undertow if she let go. Granted, even her tightest grip wouldn't phase him in the slightest. That being said, the gentle pressure of her arms around his torso was more than he could hope for. She loved him and he could feel it. That's all he ever really wanted. To be loved. To be needed. Right now, he was both. He could feel it in her touch.

         Once again, he was her entire world, just as he had been before the alley. This thought caused a smile to cross his lips. He brought up a hand to place it atop her head, gingerly stroking her hair as he did adore doing. The silence between them was blissful. He always hated all of the fucking talking. The prompts. The cameras. The silence between them… this comforting silence. He could get used to this. He hoped that she felt the same.

Sasha, on the other hand, was still struggling to get her pain levels under control. Her whole body was starting to relax and it made the throbbing more consistent but less intense. That pain, deep inside of her. God, she had barely healed at all, and they threw her to the wolves; feral wolves. She hadn’t been able to talk to Madelyn and she didn’t want to. She knew she didn’t stick to the script and that’s why Homelander had to come save her. She was grateful for him, but god, she wasn’t ready for whatever would come next. All she wanted was to go home and go to bed. A real bed in her own room. She knew she was going to be heavily reprimanded for the things she said. What was she supposed to do? Cry and run off stage? Yeah, that would have been a good fucking look.

“Would you sleep with me tonight, John..? Carry me inside, too? I think walking will hurt and I don’t want to use a fucking wheelchair…” Sasha murmured softly, her cheek still firmly pressed against his chest. Her grip was starting to ease up now as she calmed down, but she was nowhere near ready to let go of him. He was the only thing standing between her and absolute misery. She was trying to remember what Mandelyn had told her.

Don’t let him be in charge.

She was trying to ask for more, to be more of a partner than a victim. She was afraid he would say no, but then… Why would he say no? She was offering him everything he wanted. Chances to provide for her. To care for her. To make her feel loved and protected. He, himself said that was all he wanted. Well, now she was going to have him prove it. If he really meant it, he would make her life easier while she healed. She didn’t expect that to happen, but a girl could dream.

         “You want to sleep next to me, Sasha?” He smiled down at her, “Of course I'll stay with you. Of course I'll carry you. You've been through so much today. You did so well with your interview even though they tried to sabotage you. I couldn't be more proud of you.” He smiled, stroking her hair, leaning down to place a tender kiss on her head. Her soft hair against his lips as he held her there.

         “You promise no sex yet..? You promised. My insides hurt so badly. I feel like I'm being torn apart.” She admitted weakly, nuzzling her cheek closer to him. Inhaling the scent of him as deeply as her body would allow without additional pain. She hated how comforting the smell of him was. How comforting he was in this moment. “I just want to hold you and feel safe when I sleep, please.”

         “Anything for you. No sex. I promise. I promised you and Madelyn and the doctors. I'm not going to make it worse. I'm not a savage. I can wait a few weeks.” He chuckled as he assured her. “I'll sleep next to you like a good boyfriend should. Shower you with my love and affection and everything you deserve.” He mused, adoration hanging in his voice. “Make you know you're the only one who matters to me in this ugly fucking world of ours.”

“Did you mean what you said on stage, John?” The question had been burning in her mind since he had said it. She didn’t let herself believe it at the time, but she couldn’t stop thinking about it now that they were alone. Now that there weren’t cameras. She finally pulled away from him and sat up straight, though her green eyes never left his face.

“What part?” He chuckled, his hand moving from her hair to her cheek, his thumb brushing over the soft skin. He wanted to tear his gloves off and actually touch her, but he was patient. He could wait a little longer, until they were at home.

“You said that you loved me.” She spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. Despite her very conflicting feelings about him, she didn’t want him to say ‘no’. That would hurt more than the stitches inside of her. If it was all just a facade. If he really did just want to torture her for his own twisted whims.

“Sasha…” He gasped, his eyes softening as he looked at her. He couldn’t believe she just said that to him. “I’ve loved you since the first time I saw you. I’ve always loved you. I love you more than anything. Anyone. I’ll burn this city to the ground if you want me to.” He assured her firmly. “You. Are. Everything.”

“I love you, John.” The words surprised her when they left her mouth, especially with the conviction with which they were spoken. She really did mean it, didn’t she? Even after all of the things he had done to her. The pain inside of her. The bruises that had just barely disappeared. None of that mattered, did it? He was a god. He was her god. He was everything she had ever dreamed about and he was hers. He wanted to be hers. Nothing made sense, but she didn’t care. Not with everything that was already crumbling around her.

The words ‘stockholm syndrome’ had never really made sense in her head before this. Between movies and books, she couldn’t imagine that being anyone’s reality… And yet… Here she was, loving a monster who had hospitalized her and could do so again at any time he wished.

“I am so glad to hear that. I was worried you didn’t want to see me. You were so upset last time. I thought a few days of space might help you be less upset with me.” He explained, feeling a bit timid as he did so, “I hope that was alright.”

“Believe it or not…” She laughed weakly with a sigh, “I missed you. Seeing only Madelyn and the Doctors and my new PR assistant was… Draining. I didn’t have any way of telling you I wanted to see you and I knew Madelyn wouldn’t pass on the message if I asked her to.”

“Missed me… That’s so nice to hear.” He couldn’t stop smiling. It was a real smile. Not fake or sinister but genuine. He could feel the joy in his heart.

The SUV finally stopped in the garage of Vaught and Homelander exited the car quickly and was instantly around her side to open her door. He leaned in and slid his arms under her legs and behind her back so he could ease her out of the car. She had behaved so well for him today. He wanted to reward her for doing such a good job. For being such a good girl. At least this time he wasn’t trying to dodge the paparazzi at the same time. Thank goodness for this secure underground garage.

He carried her as carefully as he could, making sure he didn’t jostle her at all while he made his way up to their floor. Occasionally looking down to smile as she rests against his chest. It was obvious that she was exhausted from everything. Of course she was. He would be surprised if she wasn’t. She was only human, and a young one at that. She didn’t even open her eyes and that made his heart swell again. The blind trust she bestowed upon him.

           When he finally reached her room, he pushed the door open with his shoulder and brought her inside, kicking the door shut behind them.

         The noise of the door was loud enough to make her eyes flutter open. She groaned softly as the discomfort came back and she looked up at him with weary eyes. She didn’t try to move, only let out a trembling breath again.

         “John, would you help me take a bath..? I don't know if I can do it by myself. I think it would help me feel better.” She murmured quietly, wondering just how long his kindness would last and how long she could ride the wave of it.

         “Oh, my precious girl. I'd be happy to help you.” He chuckled as he carried her across the room and into the bathroom. “I'm going to put you on your feet now. Do you think you can stand, or does it hurt too much?”

“I can stand as long as I can hold on to you.” She assured him, bracing herself as he shifted her and gently let her feet touch the tiled floor. It took a few moments for her to gain her balance, her hands gripping his biceps with white knuckles as she tried to steady herself. The shift in position meant that the pain shot through her again like a hot rail gun and she had to take a few deep breaths to steady herself. “S-sorry… J-just give me a moment..” She managed to breathe around the pain. She could barely see straight. She knew she had asked for a bath, but now all she wanted was for him to cradle her again.

“Take your time, Sasha. You’re alright. I’ve got you. How about-” He reached around her to make sure the toilet lid was down before he lowered her into a sitting position onto it. “You relax. I’ll get that bath started for you.” He offered with a soothing tone, stroking her hair lovingly as he looked down at her. Oh, he felt for her. She was trying so hard. He was actually impressed that she wasn’t crying.

“Is there even a fucking bath in here? I only saw the shower.” She groaned softly before closing her eyes and trying to ignore the sting of tears she felt. She leaned down to attempt to unbuckle the straps of her shoes, but stopped almost immediately as the pain intensified.

“Yes, love, on the other side of the shower. I wouldn’t have brought you in here if there wasn’t one.” He assured her before leaning down to give her a long, lingering kiss atop her head before finally tearing himself from her and crossing the room.

He leaned down over the tub and quickly started the faucet. The water began flowing instantly and steaming only moments after. He impatiently took off his gloves and tossed them to the floor before touching the water. Was it too hot? He didn’t know. He didn’t feel things like other people did. He turned it down. It would be easy to bring the temperature back up if needed. When he was satisfied the temperature would be okay and there were a few inches of water in the tub, he finally came back to Sasha. She hadn’t moved an inch. Her eyes still closed as she tried to be strong. She was so resilient. He loved that about her.

“Come on now…” He cooed softly as he gingerly grabbed the hem of her dress and began pulling it up her torso. To his surprise, she didn’t even flinch. She moved her arms to allow him to lift the dress off over her head. He took his time to carefully remove her bra. He knelt down to carefully remove her shoes.

With tender hands, he grabbed her arms and eased her to her feet. He held her up with one arm wrapped around her back while the other grabbed her panties and slid them down her thighs. He didn’t even look at her now, not sexually anyway. This wasn’t about sex and he was very focused on that fact as he helped her take the few steps across the bathroom and to the tub. She held his arm tightly as he walked with her, not pressuring her to move quickly. Being patient with her small, cautious steps.

The pain was lesser now than it was, but it was still sharp. Once at the tub, he carefully helped her lift her legs so she could stand in the water. It was refreshing and mildly above lukewarm. It was pleasant and she was feeling better about having asked for a bath.

“Is it too hot? Too cold?” He questioned in a hushed tone, sounding legitimately nervous for her answer.

“It’s fine. Colder than I’d like, but that’s probably for the best because of the injury. I’m sure scalding hot water wouldn’t do me any favors.” She spoke quietly as she slowly eased herself down, grateful for his help. His arms holding her meant that her core didn’t have to work anywhere near as hard. It didn’t really have to work at all, just her arms holding his. He was so strong, like a safety railing just for her.

“I can warm-” He had started, but went quiet when she said it would be better this way. He simply nodded his head before lowering to his knees beside the tub, keeping his eyes on her, that worried look still in his blue eyes.

Her eyes closed again as she leaned back and finally allowed herself to relax. Now this, this felt nice. The warm water. Not needing to stand or even really sit. Not needing to support herself. She relaxed completely, not even worried about slipping beneath the surface. She knew he wasn’t going to let that happen. He wasn’t done with her and he wouldn’t let something as simple as a bath take her from him. She at least had that solace. If she was going to die within his care, it was going to be because of him. Not someone else or a freak accident.

She stayed in silence like this for a long time before she finally let out a sigh and opened her eyes again. She rolled her head to the side to look at him and gave him a weak smile. He looked so worried. Those big, beautiful blue eyes focused on her. She lifted a hand slowly to brush the back of her finger across his cheek, trying not to get him too wet.

“Your hands are soft…” She spoke quietly, “I don’t think you’ve ever touched me with your bare hands before. You’ve always got those stupid gloves on..” She tried to tease, lowering her hand to rest on his and squeezing softly. “I’d like it if you took them off more… For me..”

“Anything for you, Sasha. I’m…” He swallowed hard as he scanned her, “I’m surprised you… Want me to touch you, after what I did. After what I've done to you. How I got you here. How I've kept you… You didn't deserve it. I was angry but not with you. It shouldn't have been you who got hurt.”

“You didn’t mean to. It was The Deep who made you mad. I know you won’t hurt me on purpose.” She sighed before closing her eyes again. She didn’t believe the words she spoke, but she knew he would. That was all that mattered. He needed to believe she loved and trusted him. That’s the only way she was going to survive this ‘relationship’ and she knew it.

“I knew you were perfect. You keep proving it every day.” He smiled, a heavy sigh of relief leaving him as he picked up her hand and placed tender kisses upon each of her knuckles, his eyes not leaving her face. Drinking in the beautiful emerald of her eyes as she looked at him. Even exhausted, she was absolutely gorgeous. He found his eyes wandering from her face now, taking in the rest of her. The bruises were almost completely gone now. That beautiful skin of hers and the way he wanted to touch her. Knowing that she wanted him to. Fuck. That made his suit feel tighter as his cock throbbed. No. No. Not like this. She wasn’t ready yet. He couldn’t push her like that. He clenched his jaw as he tried to keep himself in check, her hand still in his.

She noticed the change in him instantly. The way his jaw clenched. Her heart raced. Had she done something wrong? Said something wrong? She swallowed hard before sitting up a little and leaning over the edge to place a small kiss on the corner of his mouth. The action was uncomfortable, but nowhere near as painful as before.

“Are you alright..?” She questioned timidly, “Did I… Say something wrong?”

“What? No.” He shook his head as his brow furrowed, “God, no. You didn’t do anything wrong sweetheart. It’s all… Me. I’m just so angry that I hurt you. I know my punishment is waiting for you to heal. I don’t want to make it any harder on you than it already is.”

“Do… I have to do more interviews?” She questioned sadly, worried that was what was on his mind.

“No, no. No interviews until you feel up to it. I’ll tell Madelyn she can fuck off if she tries it again. I’ll fly away with you if I have to. Today was already hard enough. Nothing else until you’re ready. You don’t even have to leave your room if you don’t want to. I’ll make sure everything you need is brought to you.”

“Then why… Do you have that look on your face?” She questioned worriedly, her lip starting to quiver.

He didn’t answer her. His eyes were fixated on her, but not on her face. She allowed it for a few moments before gasping and quickly splashing him in the face to break the gaze. He gasped and leaned back, wiping his hand over his face and looking at her with a stunned expression.

“What the hell-” He started.

“You were looking inside of me!” She shouted angrily as she sat up again, placing her hand over her abdomen. “You were fucking checking my healing because you’re too fucking impatient to just let me heal naturally. You’re selfish and you don’t want to wait for my mortal human healing.” She cried out, tears burning her eyes now as they began to roll down her cheeks. “I thought I could trust you!”

“You can trust me!” He shouted back, placing his hands on her shoulders and easing her back down. “You’re okay. Calm down. You’re going to hurt yourself. Yes. I was checking. I wanted to make sure you didn’t do more damage today. I swear I wasn’t plotting to ask you for sex, sweetheart. Please trust me.”

         “How can I trust you!” Sasha wailed pitifully as her back rested against the angled tub edge, looking up at him while he held her shoulders to keep her in place. “You haven't earned my trust back!”

         “I know I haven't!” He barked back impatiently, his eyes glowing red for a brief moment before going back. Fuck. That was a misstep and he knew it. The look on her face told him all he needed to know.

         That moment was enough to strike terror back into her. So that was the limit. The limit of his kindness and his willingness to accept ugly facts. Calling him out for shitty behavior as it was happening was a No-Go. She didn't even get a chance to say anything before his hand was on her cheek, brushing away her tears.

         “My temper got away from me.” He replied with a heavy sigh. His jaw still clenched, as if it physically pained him to apologize to her. “I didn't mean to scare you.”

         “I know…” She breathed weakly, shrinking down into the water until it covered her mouth, her nose barely above it. Her breath left little ripples across the surface while she tried to calm herself.

         “Hey, you're alright. I won't hurt you. I'm sorry. How are you feeling?” He questioned, reaching over to stroke her hair, feeling relief when she didn't flinch.

         “Better…” She sighed after sitting up again. “I can probably get out soon. Put something comfortable on and try to sleep.”

“Do you think you can keep yourself above the water while I grab your pajamas?” He inquired softly as he paused his hand on her hair.

“Yeah…” She said with a small but confident nod, “I can do that.”

“Good. I’ll be right back.” He assured her once more before standing up. He turned to leave but paused. He turned back to give her a quick kiss on her head once more before he finally left the bathroom.

The moment he left, her mind began to race. Her eyes scanned the room. No razors. No scissors. Nothing sharp within reach. Even if she could reach, she wouldn’t be able to bleed out before he got medical help. Even when things were going well, the thoughts of ending her own life lingered.

He had no idea what to grab for her as he opened the drawers of her dresser. Why did one person need so many pairs of pajamas? Did she want warm ones? Long? Short? He groaned softly to himself before blowing out a deep breath. He hadn’t ever really needed to dress anyone else before. This was a nightmare. Saving people was easy. Killing people was easier. Figuring out what his love would want to wear her first day out of her hospital room? A literal nightmare.

He finally decided on a lilac top with short sleeves, and matching long pants. They felt soft to the touch and a good medium between being too cold or too warm. He made his way back into the bathroom and set the folded outfit on the sink, looking at her and feeling relief that she was still above the water just as she said she could manage.

“Let me grab you a towel.” He said quickly, grabbing a folded towel from the rack between the shower and the tub, bringing it over to hang on a hook near the tub. He bent down and she reached up to grab his arms, allowing him to lift her out of the tub and back onto her feet. She was much more steady now than she had been. He grabbed the towel and quickly dried her off before tossing the towel aside.

“Does it look bad..? Inside, I mean?” She questioned sadly. He had looked, hadn’t he? He may as well share that information with her and be a semi-decent human being.

“It looks like flesh and stitches, love. No infections. The stitches are dissolving. I’ve seen a lot of grotesque human anatomy and yours is not on that list.” He said with a shrug before turning around and holding up the shirt for her. She lifted her arms and allowed him to dress her. He even knelt down to put her pants on her, allowing her to brace her hands on his shoulders so she wouldn’t lose her balance.

“I appreciate everything you’ve done for me today. I would have ended up back in the hospital room if you hadn’t come to my rescue. Thank you.” She breathed as he slid her pants up to her hips and secured them for her. He didn’t stand up, only looked up at her with a smile.

“I’m going to do everything I can to keep you out of the infirmary. Keep you out of the limelight, for at least a little while longer. Hopefully these hyenas are satisfied with what we’ve given them.” He agreed before finally standing up to look down at her, “I think we should get you to bed. Do you want anything?”

“Um.. Food, probably. I haven’t eaten since this morning and it wasn’t much. Something to eat and some water would be great.”

“I can make that happen, but first-” He quickly scooped her into his arms, doing so as gently as he could as he carried her to the bed, leaning down to flick back the comforter before lowering her into it and pulling the blankets up to her shoulders. “You relax and get comfortable.”

He leaned down to give her a kiss on the forehead, but to his great surprise, her hands were on his cheeks. She guided him lower to touch their lips together instead. He froze for a moment before cupping her cheek and eagerly returned her kiss.

“Thank you.” She breathed against his lips.

“Of course.” He assured her before reluctantly pulling away from her. He crossed the room and exited quickly, shutting the door behind him. She briefly found herself wondering if he had locked it, not that she had any strength to try and escape him anyway.

So, this was going to be it. Living in perpetual fear of a god who decided she would be his personal companion until death do them part. How long would she survive this? She wondered if she should start making tallies on a calendar. Would it be weeks? Months? Years?

Years.

Chapter Text

Sasha sat in her bedroom alone for only fifteen minutes while he went to get her something to eat. The way her mind raced while he was gone was almost enough to make her dizzy. She still didn’t know where all of her stuff went. Surely he didn’t have a photographic memory. Not everything would be where it was in her room before. He had helped unbox everything for her. She hadn’t spent a single night in this room before ending up in the fucking infirmary.

While she waited, she adjusted the pillows on her bed so that she could sit up against the wall and be a little more comfortable while doing so. Resting back against the wall also made her core work less, which in turn, made the pain hurt less.

Madelyn’s help did come in handy, at least. He truly did appreciate being asked to do things, at least, for now. She was going to continue to test those waters. See how much control she could take before he snapped. It would be worth it a snap or two, if it meant that the majority of her time here wouldn’t be quite so hostile. She had allowed her eyes to close as she savored the feeling of a less intense pain.

         She jumped slightly, wincing as her body jolted. She knew he was coming back, yet the sound of the door was startling. She watched him come in with a tray of food. He brought it over and placed it across her thighs, being careful of her injuries.

Within moments, the smell of the food hit her nose and made her salivate. She looked down at the plate of fresh fried eggs, bacon, and toast. He brought her breakfast? Surely, it was later in the day than that, but… This did sound good. She lifted a hand and cautiously picked up a piece of bacon before taking a bite, closing her eyes and allowing herself to savor it. Please, let the rest of today be a good day.

“I didn’t know what you would want.” Homelander spoke softly. He grabbed the rolling, black computer chair from her vanity dresser and pulled it beside her bed. He sat down and straightened out his suit as he looked at her. “Hopefully this is alright. I can grab something el-”

“No, thank you. This is perfect.” She replied softly as she took another small bite of the bacon. She ate in silence and he didn’t dare interrupt. He simply sat next to the bed and watched her as she did. When her plate was nearly empty she wiped her mouth and let out a trembling sigh before turning to look at him. “Do you think I’ll be able to sleep in my own bed tonight..? I know you said you were going to keep me out of the infirmary, but I just want to make sure. I don’t want to go back into that room, John. I haven’t even been able to sleep in my own room; let alone my bed. I just want to sleep here and not be disturbed by Doctors or Venus every five fucking minutes.” She sighed.

“Yes, you will sleep in here tonight, and every night, unless you want to sleep elsewhere. No one will bother you. I’ll stay here with you and only as close as you want me. I’ll sleep on the floor if I need to. I can hear them coming. I will make sure no one opens this door that you don’t want to see.” He assured her firmly. He meant every word of it, too. He was going to do everything within his power to keep her out of the limelight until at the very least her stitches were gone. Two and a half more weeks? Sure. He could stall for that long. He would firmly tell Madelyn and everyone else they can go get fucked in the meantime.

“Thank you. That will be a relief. It will help me feel more at home to sleep in my own bed. A solid night of sleep would probably be good for my healing too, if I had to guess.” She said with a weak laugh before letting out a soft sigh again. The laughing hurt, but not as much as she had thought it might. “Are you still willing to sleep in my bed with me? Or did I burn that bridge when I lost my temper in the tub?” She inquired weakly, expecting the answer to be a ‘No’. She thought for sure he wasn’t going to give her what she wanted, not after she had yelled at him and had a tantrum.

“Of course I will. Anything you want.” He smiled warmly, reaching out to touch her cheek. He realized he put his gloves back on when he had left her room. He quickly pulled his hand back and took the gloves off, tossing them to the floor with a soft thud. He extended his arm again to cup her cheek, smiling as the flesh of his hand felt the warmth of her cheek. “You said you don’t want to feel the gloves. I’ll do my best to remember to take them off for you.”

“Thank you.” She smiled. It was a real smile, too. Being with him like this was actually... Well, it was actually kind of nice. He was so attentive and gentle. She hoped she could make it last. She knew where the line was now, at least, had a vague idea. She wasn’t going to push him that far on purpose. “I’m done eating. Would you take the tray away, please? I want to lay down and try to rest. Take your costume off before you come to bed, please. I want to curl up against John for a while, not Homelander.” She explained.

“You’ll have as much John as you could possibly want.” He assured her with a chuckle as he stood up and reached over her to grab the tray. He brought it across the room and set it on her dresser. That would work for now. He would bring it back to the kitchen after she woke up. She would want something else to eat by then, surely.

When he turned around, he saw her slowly adjusting to move her pillows back down and he smiled to himself. He really did enjoy being with her like this. There was that warm feeling in his heart again that could only be love. That feeling that came over him every time he really got to be with her, which wasn’t as often as he would have liked. Watching her adjust her blankets and lay back down, it made him remember why he fell into all of this. How innocent she looked. Small and Fragile. Someone who needed a hero more than most others. Someone he could really protect. Be the superhero that everyone else thought he was. He didn’t give a fuck about the general population, of course, but her? Oh, he wanted to be everything for her.

Once she was comfortably laying down, he took the time to remove his costume. He picked his gloves up from the floor and placed them on her dresser beside the tray. He unclipped his cape, folded it and set it on top before peeling himself out of his spandex, folding it and setting it neatly on top. He took off his boots and socks, setting them on the floor next to the dresser before finally making his way back to her.

“You sure there’s going to be enough room for both of us?” He chuckled softly as he grabbed the comforter to pull it back, “This is, what? A full?”

“Yes, well…” She yawned with a small wince as she carefully rolled onto her side to look up at him, “Up until very recently, I’ve been sleeping in it alone. Didn’t really need a bigger one, but now that I’m on the Vaught budget with a huge man sleeping next to me, maybe I’ll look into getting an upgrade.” There was actually a little humor in her voice. Being in her own room was helping more than she had even hoped for.

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about that, Darling.” He smiled as he sat down on the bed and adjusted himself into the blankets before laying down and pulling the comforter back up. He reached over to tuck her in to the best of his abilities as he looked at her. He rested his hand on her shoulder for a moment before moving it to her head so he could stroke her hair. He frowned when he felt the bobby pins that held her braids into place still. “Do you want me to help you take down your hair? Sleeping with it like this can’t possibly be comfortable.”

“What?” She questioned, wiggling her arm out from beneath her blankets to touch her head and a weak laugh left her lips, “Wow, I didn’t even notice it was still up. I suppose I’ve been distracted by the intense discomfort in my abdomen. If you want to take it down, you can. I’m so tired that it isn’t going to affect how I sleep.”

“I’ll fix what I can.” He assured her as he began pulling out the bobby pins and tossing them over her shoulder onto the floor. Each one made a little tink as it hit the hard floor. He slowly unfurled her hair before snapping the small binders at the end of each braid. He slowly and meticulously ran his fingers through each braid to release them. He only got to the side and the back of her head. He wasn’t going to make her move. He decided he would simply wait until she was asleep and repositioned before he tried to get the rest. “You really are gorgeous, you know. I don’t just say it to be flattering. I really do mean it.” He spoke barely above a whisper as his hand slid beneath her now loose, wavy locks to cup her cheek.

“I know you do.” She smiled in return, closing her eyes and simply allowing herself to enjoy and even savor the gentle contact he gave her. “Come closer?”

“You want me closer?” A smile spread across his face, “Of course.” With no hesitation, he closed the gap between them, adjusting the blankets to better cover them both as he left a mere few inches between them. He could feel the warmth of her, and her soft breath against his bare skin. The sensation sent a tingle down his spine and he could feel himself getting hard. He closed his eyes tightly and let out a heavy breath through his nose as he tried to will it to go away, but the effort was in vain.

“It’s okay, John…” She replied sleepily as she carefully closed the remaining space between them, pressing her forehead against his collarbone gently. “I know you can’t help it. It’s okay.” She tried to soothe him. She could imagine what he was going through. He wanted so badly to touch her and yet, he didn’t. She knew that took a tremendous amount of self control, especially for a God who could really do anything the fuck he wanted. He didn’t have to wait for her to heal. He didn’t have to stop when it happened. For as fucked up as this whole situation was, she did truly felt loved by him. Well, hello, Stockholm Syndrome.

“I’m glad that you understand, Darling.” He breathed softly before leaning down to place a kiss on top of her head, sliding his hand into her hair to caress the back of her head. “I will not hurt you.” He reassured her again, speaking firmly, more to himself than to her.

“I know you won’t. Would you lay on your back for me, please?” She requested sweetly.

“Alright..?” He replied with a furrowed brow as he pulled himself away from her and adjusted to lay down on his back. He wondered why she wanted him to move, but he realized why very quickly.

He felt her small form curl against his side, her hand on his chest and her cheek resting comfortably against his shoulder. Her hand flexing against his chest and he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and enjoying the feeling of her initiated contact. He slid his arm beneath her to loosely curl around her and drape his hand across her hip.

“Are you comfortable?” He questioned softly, turning his head to look down at her, really only seeing that raven hair and the tip of her nose. He felt her nod her head against his chest and it made his heart flutter, “Good.”

“I feel so safe with you.” She yawned, nuzzling more against his warm skin. She continued to allow her hand to flex against his chest before slowly moving it down his torso to his abdomen. He was completely smooth. She wondered if that was maintenance or just a side effect of being a super? That would be a question for later. She didn’t really want to ask about it now and ruin the mood.

“All I ever wanted was for you to feel safe with me.” He smiled against her hair, placing a small kiss on her head again. “All I ever wanted was to protect you and keep you safe. To allow you every comfort and luxury you could ever dream of in this life.”

“I know.” She laughed softly before letting out a trembling breath as the pain shot through her again briefly. It was actually unbearable that joy was insufferable right now. She wished she could just exist without constant pain. Soon, she reminded herself. Soon, she would heal and hopefully all of this pain and misery would be a distant memory.

“Don’t hurt yourself, Darling.” He urged her, his fingers flexing against her hip but not actually squeezing her. He didn’t know how far her pain radiated and certainly didn’t want to exacerbate the issue.

“I won't, I promise. I… I do want to do something for you, though, if you’ll let me. You’ve just been…” She let out a single, breathy laugh, “So wonderful today. I want to do something nice for you but I can’t do much. Are you willing to bear with me while I try?”

“Of course.” He replied into her hair. Her breath was hot against his chest and it was almost enough to give him goosebumps.

“Good.” She smiled before slowly tracing her hands even lower, feeling just the smallest presence of a hair trail down his pelvis as she approached his cock, cupping it gently through the fabric of his briefs. She felt his breath hitch and his body go tense as she touched his hard cock, but he didn’t otherwise move.

“Sasha” He breathed sharply, “I promised-”

“I know… And we aren’t going to have sex, John. I just wanted to…” She emphasized the words with the gentle movements of her hand. Her fingers flexed around the hard shaft. “Hopefully give you a good enough handjob without hurting myself that you at least get some relief while laying beside me. Despite everything, the idea of you suffering through your erection all night while I sleep does make me feel a little guilty.”

He couldn’t stop the quiet groan that left his throat at her suggestion. God, every time he thought he couldn’t possibly love her anymore, she proved yet again how worthy she was of his devotion. Absolutely perfect.

“Alright.” He agreed, trying to tone down just how eager he was for her to touch him. Fuck, it was her idea, too. He knew that he should tell her ‘no’ and insist that she stop, but the way her fingers felt made him melt beneath her. “Just be careful.”

“I will. If it hurts too much, I’ll stop.” She assured him, though, that statement struck her with fear. What if stopping wasn’t an option? What if she pushed him so far and he decided he needed to finish with or without her compliance? She pushed back those thoughts firmly as she slid her hand into the elastic of his briefs, her warm hand around his hard shaft.

“Fuck…” He moaned down to her, closing his eyes and just feeling her. He shifted in the bed to try and make her reach easier, but she whimpered the moment he did. “I’m sore-”

“Shh…” She urged, lifting her head to look up at him, quickly pressing her lips to his, her hand still expertly working his shaft. “Hold still for me, John.” She purred quietly, “Just let me pleasure you.”

“I-” He choked softly and simply nodded his head, lowering his head down onto the pillow and closing his eyes. Oh, the way his cock throbbed beneath her touch when she gave him instructions like that. He hadn’t expected her to be so confident, not this quickly, that’s for fucking sure. Yet, here she was, blowing his mind.

She noticed the way he reacted. The way his cock pulsed with her touch and she felt the pre-cum oozing down to her fingers. She quickly used her fingers to dance around the lubrication before going back to her slow stroke.

“Oh, do you like that?” She smiled against his shoulder, opening her mouth to nip at his skin ever so gently, “You like it when you’re told what to do?”

“Mhm..” Was all he was able to choke out between the moans that locked themselves into his throat, slowly escaping as groans through clenched teeth as his chest actually worked. Her mind raced and her heart fluttered at this realization. Oh, maybe surviving this fucking hostage situation would be easier than she had expected.

“Oh, such a good boy, answering me so honestly.” She smiled. She felt that change in him again. Another strangled moan left his mouth and this time his whole body shuddered at her words and she could feel him throb again, oozing more lubrication onto her hand. This was all the information she needed to feel confident in her control. She tightened her grip on his cock and started moving her hand more quickly, making sure to take her time to tease that ridge of the tip. He jerked again and this time it was enough to make her wince.

“Nuh uh, bad boy…” She tsked before biting his shoulder harder and shaking her head, brushing her lips against the fresh bite mark. “I said hold still. You’re going to hurt me if you keep moving like that. You don’t want to hurt me, Do you? John?”

“N-no…” He stammered, his breathing hard, like he had been running. That was actually kind of cute to hear. He was a god with unlimited stamina, so making him breathless truly did make her feel powerful.

“Good.” She smiled again, very carefully repositioning herself to give him a long, slow kiss on the cheek before sliding over to his ear, “Why don’t you be a good boy and cum for me, John?” She offered, wondering if it would actually work for her.

To her great fucking surprise, it fucking worked. There was a stifled groan behind clenched teeth that could have been mistaken for a whimper as his hips half-bucked before he held them still. His hot cum oozed down over her hand. His veins pulsated under her touch as she held him. His hand came up to grab her wrist and hold her still. She took a sharp gasp and braced for him to break her arm, but he didn’t. His grip wasn’t that tight. He still had enough sense about him not to hurt her. That also meant she hadn’t crossed any lines with him.

“So…” She smiled against his cheek before pulling back to look down at him, carefully propping herself up on an elbow. “Got ah… A little bit of a praise kink there, do you?” The question was truly sincere, with not a hint of mockery in her voice, only curiosity.

“Yeah…” He carefully adjusted himself without jostling her too much, his eyes still closed as he cleared his throat, “I suppose you could say that.”

“You’re not upset now that the post-nut clarity hit, are you?” She questioned, not worried about her safety quite yet.

“The what?” He scoffed before opening his eyes to look up at her. Was that adoration he saw in her eyes? Sure looked like it.

“Post-nut clarity? You know. You have an orgasm and then you’re ashamed of the thoughts or porn that made you cum.” She tried to explain, forgetting that she knew vastly different slang because of public schooling.

“No.” He chuckled with a small shake of his head. “Hold still.” He told her as he leaned up to plant a kiss on her cheek. He carefully got himself out of the bed and went to the bathroom. He reached inside to the shelf next to the door without turning the light on and grabbed a washcloth. He brought it to her and wiped off her hand before cleaning himself up, haphazardly tossing the rag aside after.

“Oh, I-” She began as he stood up and walked around her. She felt her cheeks flush when he cleaned up her hand. That was consistent, at least. He’d cleaned her up each time they’d been together. That was nice at least. “Thank you, John.”

“You’re welcome, Darling.” He smiled as he sat back down on the bed and reached out to cup her face with both hands. He leaned in for a deep, lingering kiss before pulling back and pressing his forehead against hers, “Not ashamed of anything we just did. I never expected you to be so confident in that role, but I loved it.”

“I’m glad.” She smiled, breathless from his kiss, “I’ll keep that in mind. Think that this might be enough to keep you satisfied while I heal?”

“Oh, yeah.” He said playfully with a small nod, “Absolutely it will. Now, let’s get you back to bed. I can’t believe you’re still awake.” He said suddenly, his mind clearly much more focused now that he didn’t need to worry about blue balls.

Before she could even respond, he had fluffed her pillow and was making quick work of her last section of braided hair. He tossed the pins over her shoulder before smoothing her hair down and brushing through it with his fingers. Once he was satisfied, he grabbed her shoulders and carefully laid her back down on the bed, scanning her body language to ensure he didn’t accidentally hurt her.

She didn’t try to fight against him or even ask questions. She was curious to see how well he would do if left to his own devices. To her surprise, it was a flawless exchange where he didn’t add any undue pain to her as he tucked her back in. It was only after she allowed herself to fully relax that he lay back down, fixing the covers over them. He slid one arm under her head as he lay on his side to look at her, pressing himself against her just as he had per her request before their little exchange.

She looked up at him and bent her elbow to trace the back of her index finger across his cheek as she looked up at him, her eyes still bright even in the dim room lit only by the nightlight on the opposite wall.

“Would you do anything for me?” She questioned suddenly, her words barely audible.

“I would do anything for you.” He assured her, turning his head to kiss her finger, “Why are you asking? What would you ask of me, Darling?”

“I have a very big favor to ask you.” She said, her tone more serious now. Her green eyes studied his face in firm silence for what felt like eons before she finally spoke again. Her voice crisp and clear in the darkness.

“I want you to help me kill my parents.” She stated firmly without an ounce of hesitation or remorse.