Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Germany lied in his bed looking at the ceiling because he is a raging homosexual. He turns to his side and sees Italy, really close to him, staring at him smiling like those horror movie jumpscares. The blonde almost shit himself.

"ITALY VHAT ZHE HELL ARE JOU DOING IN MY BED!" shouted the gay blonde.

"....Want to see my butt."

As a gay emo, germany said "Oh Scheiße ja. Lass uns heute Nacht einen Weltkrieg im Bett machen."

Germany got up from his bed and walked over to the random basket of potatoes he had there for no reason. He had a potato when he got back. He deepthroated the potato. His clothes had instantly been deleted.

"Want to get a taste of Deutschland."

Italy smiled. "Capovolgerò la mappa del mondo così sarai sotto di me."

Germany had no fucking idea what that meant. Then the Italian got up and did that sex hand gesture really hard. Germany got turned on so much that he shoved 4 fingers up his ass.

Italy suddenly appeared behind him and groped his ass."Oh ya fuck me Italy."

They got on the bed and started shagging.

"Hey Germany, you l(r)eft your wurst-"

Japan looked up at what the fuck was going on. Italy had invaded Germany. Oh wow. It was so hot. "なんてこった、セクシーなやおい" he said.

Germany and pasta man were turned on by whatever the fuck japan said. "Warum gibst du mir nicht einen Vorgeschmack auf dein dickes Katana."

Japan joined them because this how the story goes. He shoved his fingers in Germany's mouth and started fapping aggressively. Germany made noises like anime girls in hentai. Then Japan shoves his dick in Germany mouth. "Is this how you want it?"

Germany is very pleased because he liked riesige dicke Wurst füllt seine engen nuttigen Löcher.

And then they cum. Germany and Italy go sleep. Meanwhile japan stayed up all night writing gay fanfiction.

Chapter Text

The next day. Germany woke up feeling like shit, because of his gay, he likes to watch gay hentai on his laptop at exactly 7am.

So he decided to watch Ai no kusabi because yeah. He opened his laptop and typed faster than Italy switched sides in ww2. He was left in peace for like an hour until italy woke up.

"PASTAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"

Germany was very angry because Italy had ruined the smexy part. He pulled Italy by the curl which made him moan in a very sexual way.

Meanwhile, France was outside Germany's house spying because he needed to get information about whatever. The blonde made sure to pay super extra attention to where he stepped because traps were everywhere for some reason. But France would alway pay more attention to the state of his clothes. He recently got new boots aswell, he certainly cannot get them fucked.  Then, for some reason images of nude England started flooding his mind. Various pictures with different positions. Mon dieu! They were so hot like, so hot. Because of his dumbass self, he tripped over some wire on the fucking ground and it held his ankle. He fell because he was weak and couldn't get up. He groaned as he realised he couldn't get out.

So unfortunately, his cheese had to wait. He felt devastated because he misses his cheese at home. He loves the cheese so much. Sometimes he dreams about the cheese. That they live a perfect life together. To own a cottage in a beautiful, picturesque forest. With birds tweeting outside the window every morning. Maybe a lake outside with some swans. Was this how it was going to end? He didn't even tell the cheese how much he cares. He wondered what the cheese must be doing right now. Probably his fridge doing nothing because realistically, what would cheese do. France started crying like a pussy. Then he heard some noises coming from Germany's house. It sounded like moans and they were hot.

Japan woke up because Germany and italy were so fucking loud. He was all like "あなたの同性愛者を閉めて、私はあなたのお尻の上にボウルを突き刺すつもりです"

Then he breathed slowly in and out before chanting, "Oh from the book of gay and lesbian love, please make these homosexuals shut the fuck up and obey my command for an hour and make them beg for my giant katana. Nsjajqbjskcooc ksnwbwvgwvs jdjksbnsjajdhd jajna. Jxjansbgevejka jjddhuvufjsnkwoyjjrhtjt jdnsnbjfjr dicks."

Instantly Germany and Italy bowed infront of Japan and they are horny. They said together,"Please feed us with your thick semen master."

Japan was like, "Yes, I'll make sure to feed you both so good."

Italy was first because every one loves ragazzi italiani carini e dolci. Italy moaned as Japan thrusted. "Oh sì, Giappone! C-cazzo! Proprio lì! Stai colpendo...il m-mio posto, s-si sente così bene."

Japan tugged Italy's curl and he moaned really loudly. Germany watched Italy being pounded and felt jealous. He wanted that big 'wust' up his ass. Japan came inside of Italy, then went for Germany. They were done a few minutes later with the tall man screaming japan's name. The Italian and German fell asleep while hugging japan.

Japan on the other hand stayed up all night reading gay manga.

Chapter Text

Germany woke up first, he was so tired but couldn't fall asleep again so he decided to get some shit done other than suck wurst all day. He didn't pay attention to what he was doing so he ended up putting on a teal dress that was knee length.

He decided to go outside because he was felt like it. He loved fresh air because it felt like it could clean his soul from the gay but it never does. He looked at the clock and realised that it was 6pm, what the fuck. He though it was like 10am.

He stepped outside his house and was shocked by what he saw. It was France! DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUN. It was nothing to worry about because Germany had invaded France and they always surrendered so it was fine.

"What are you doing here France, Coming to shove sex toys up our ass or something?"

"No, please Britian told me to come here...and....take pictures."

"I don't like lies, cheese eater."

"At least I don't suck potatoes for a living you krau-"

"Say that word and I will shove my foot up you ass."

"You're still a sausage-sucker."

"It looks like someone needs a spanking."

Germany dragged France's french ass into the house. Franch was crying while the centipede in the shed started twerking. Germany was all like "Oh mein fucking god, I'm to hot and sexy to deal with you."

He dragged him up the stairs and into his smexy room that had a poster that says 'Wurst is life, Wurst is love'. France was like, "Eeeeeewww obtenez des mains grasses de mon manteau!!!!!"

And then he just started screaming. Germany was angry and started arguing with France. Then Itay and Japain came over and was like, omg shut the fuck up. Then Japan realised that Germnay was wearing a dress and instantly disconnected from the server. Earlier, Italy found some cat ears and put them on. Now he has a very high chance of dying because he could accidentally learn French.

Italy went up to France and germoney. "Uwu I'm such a emo goofy neko. I'm such a crackhead gemini. uwuwuwuuwuwuwuwuwuuwuwuwuwuwuuwwuuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuuwuwuwowowowowoowowowowowowowowoowowowowowowowowoowowowowowowowowowiwowoowowowowowowowowo"

"ITALY SHUT THE FUCK UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP"

"Uwu sowy I'm such a crackhead 🤪😜"

"Anyway we are going to turn France into our servant."

"Attendre ce que la baise!! No I'm not."

Germany shouted again, "I don't fucking caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, now do the fucking dishes and make us some snails."

Japan suddenly reconnected. "Snails? Why the fu-"

"M-mais, I didn't want it to end like this.....t-this i-is so......Allemagne je veux que tu sois gros bite je mon cul!"

"....Frankreich....just make me snails."

France got up and went to the kitchen. He saw that the sink was full of dishes. He sighed sadly,"I wish that someome could make me that full." He washed them because he didn't want germany to go full on 10th May 1940 on him. But France was depressed.

After like 2h he managed to make snails. He ran to germany like some anime girl. France was so clumsy that he almost dropped the food.

"Uwu sowy da-..I-i mean Germany uwu...I'm just a little clumsy baka a-and this won't ha-happen again."

"I don't care, can you get me beer."

"O-OK uwu."

France ran to the kitchen like an anime highschool girl. He came back with a massive glass of beer. France sighed sadly, "I wish someone could give me a dick this big to suck on."

He went back to Germany and gave him the beer. Germany drank the beer and was happy.

"Uwu I'm so happy you wike it maste- I-I meant Germany."

Germany suddenly felt like his heart had stopped. He dropped his fork and stared at France. "You're talking like italy after he put those ears on." he started panting aggressively.

"Oh Scheiße.....t-this...its..its a v-virus."

Chapter Text

"Oh Scheiße.....t-this...its..its a v-virus."

Franch blushed cutely and cutely stared at germany. Germany was so scared. "Oh mein verdammter Gott, das ist ein Albtraum, ich muss dich und Italien ficken, um es loszuwerden."

"Uwu." France moaned.

Germany panted and ran away somewhere in his gay ass mansion. Only now wheen he was running through the corridor, he realised that he put a lot of pictures of gay german porn stars that had their dicks censored with pictures of wurst. He ran into some random room, it was dark so he obviously turned the light switch on because he isn't one of those dumb Americans in horror movies. He heard France skipping behind him saying "owo! Daddy you're such a cute baka Uwu."

He had completely forgotten about this room. It was the room where he kept all of his gay and lesbian porno, bdsm gear, vibrators, condoms, chastity belt and a whole more pile of smexy shit. He hid behind his box of vibrators and took out a big ass dildo and a riding crop from the corner for protection.

He felt his heart beat really fucking fast. His breathing sped up when he heard the French man get closer. Then the door slammed opened with the faint smell of cheesey baguettes. "Uwu, Allemagne! Allemagne! Mignonne petite Allemagne où es-tu?"

Germany was ready to shove the nearest thing up France's ass. "Uwu Peekaboo germany~"

"Oh mein verdammter Brotscheiben in meinem Arsch!!!!"

Frank and Germany were going to have a super intense non gay, non sexual fight. France transformed into magical strike eccept all he had was a bow on his hair, boots and a bikini. Germnay tried to contain himself from performing an illegal act by shoving a vase up his own ass and tried to stay focused.

France did a jojo pose and attacked germany with his super special magical strikey pink pink powerful definitely not going to surrender later gay lazer beam. "Avec mes pouvoirs magiques sexy, j'appelle la Tour Eiffel Godemiché Lazer faisceau!!!!!!"

It got to germany's cokc and he was in pain because he was an average homosexual male. Then France was out of magic and turned back into normal self with blue and red clothes. He fainted and passed out on top of god knows what sex toys were under him.

He started singing some song "I'm not gay guys that ain't me I'm just comfortable with my sexuality, so I can admit when I see a guy who has a handsome face and pretty eyes and rock hard chest and rippling abs and the tightest ass and th-"

"In Ordnung.....im never eating snails again." Germany dragged France by the leg and threw him in the kitchen. He went upstairs to see what japan and italy were doing. He opened the door and saw that they were on his computer reading a fanfiction. Germany went closer to them and saw that they were reading a China x america fanfiction. And it was hot, China was topping America holy scheiße.

"Ummm guys...its time for training and I also need to call russia."

Japan and italy turned their heads really slowly like those horror movies. Germany also heard cracking sounds when they turned their heads.

"Uwu Doitsu why are you going to call russia, you wittle baka!"

Germany forgot that itaky had virus, japan probably has it aswell!!! *very large inhale taken* He needs to call russia! Germany ran to his phone and called Russia.

"Hey Stali- I mean russia....some crazy bullshit just happened and I need your big, fat co- your help."

"Germany....you need help."

"Why the fuck do you sound like you're crying."

"because....America just asked me to make him 200 25cm condoms." then russia started crying and whining. Germany heard some other random voices in the background. He heard things like 'estonia you're so tight' and 'you're so hard' and 'lithuania no, not there' and 'you're going to make me come' and 'harder' and 'guys can I put legos in my ass'.

Gernamy said, "Uh Russland....what the actual Scheiße is going on."

Then there were scratching sounds and a really loud bang. "Sorry germany they are having a pillow fight."

"I don't care, look we have this uwu virus going on and I need your atom bombs."

"I'm not giving you my fucking atom bombs."

"Russland this is a serious virus and its fucking dangerous France, Japan and Italy are affected."

"Are you sure or are you going to take those atom bombs and bomb my country."

"no, I promise you."

"and stop trying to fucking invade my country."

"Please russia, at least come over and give me your atom bombs."

"You're not getting them."

"no please russia."

"No."

"Please please please please please please please!!"

"No fuck off."

"Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please Please please please please please please please pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeee. " Germany was bacically crying at this point. He really wanted russia's 'atom bomb'😏.

"Ok fine I'll come over and bring them."

"Thaaaaaank you~~~~"

"Fuck off."

Russia hung up.

Germany cleared his throat. Nun, jetzt muss ich mich um die Achsenmächte und den Pedo-Käse-Mann kümmern. He went to the kitchen were france was sleep deprived and singing lady gaga songs. He took out a packet of wust from the fridge and started cooking. He was drooling from the sight of it. It was so thick. It looked so good. He just wanted to lick it and take it into his mouth. Then to suck it so well. Then after some time he would taste the glorious white stuff. Or maybe if he was a bad boy he wouldn't be allowed. Maybe it would just spray across his face or it would just be on the floor and he would have to lick it. He knew they preferred it that way, making him so desperate for these dirty things. Then they would spank him and call him bad or whore or slut or whatever. Then they would make him spread his legs and they would-

"Uwu germany bakaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

Germany got his thinking interrupted. He just stared at the wurst until it was done. Then the second it was done he threw it cutely on his plate and aggressively devoured it.

Then he heard banging noises from his bedroom and japan moaning. Germany ignored it and just ate. Meanwhile, France was still fucked in the head but now he has a raging eiffel tower.

"Oh mon cher, tu es si mignon, j'aimerais t'aimer de vous avoir sous mes draps."

"Ok that's enough Scheiße for now. France stay here and make sure I have a baguette on the table for me."

"Ugh fine!!" OK so france was back to normal now.

Now he had to lock japan and italy in that room until russia fucking comes. He had to be really sneaky (but he doesn't have to because they are fucking and they are so loud so they won't even hear police sirens).

But they heard germany's gay footsteps from a mile away. When germany got there, he saw the key was on his desk which was next to jpan and italy.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!

Chapter Text

HolyshitholyshitHolyshitholyshitHolyshitholyshitHolyshitholyshit

Those peaple can fucking smell him, how was he going to get that key? 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

He walked slowly towards them. Then just when he was about to get the key naked japan tackled Germany. Fuc

The naked italy showed up infront of him. "Uwu You thought you could get this wittle key. Uwu, you're such a baka. Hahahshhahsgsgaggdudjdndknsnsjakjsbwnsbsknzbcjwknakoowknsjdhdbhsjdjsbehxhbdnejwjwjjdgrhudjfivuychejkskammallandbdhfhjdhshusudbbdjdbsjsibshdhdujejsosjdbhxhgdgwueyyieosonsbbzvvcjdkmzmzklxkdjdbdhickdlsos....japan take him."

Japan deleted germany's clothes with his sexy magical power. Germany was like moving everywhere and it made japan mad. "動いてクソをやめるか、私はあなたのドイツのソーセージを削除します!!"

Then he shoved his dick up his tight, fat ass. And germany moaned like a lot."あなたはそのような痴女です、あなたはこれを愛していませんか?"

Germnay didn't know what japan said, and he didn't even hear what he said because he was bacically on cloud 9. He held the rug really tight. Then japan had an orgasm and done it inside of germany. Then he passed out  and then italy instantly turned into a helicopter and started dancing dead fornite dances and germany tried not to cringe. He got his clothes eventually and left. So in the end, germany got the keys and locked the two weirdos in that room. That was easy asf.

Germany walked down the stairs and made his way to some shitty kitchen that he shoved France in. "I hope France got me my baguette."

Germany was shocked to see that France has no trousers and was exposing his raging eiffel tower. "Was this the baguette you wanted Allemagne? Is it big enough." Germany's brain was roasted.

"I'll make you suck mine later but now russia is coming so fuck off."

"but come on we can do it."

"fuck off."

"It will be fast."

"You're supposed to be my servant go clean my house or some shit."

"no."

"Can i have crepes."

"no."

"If you don't listen to me, I will shove my steel water bottle up your ass."

"I don't care, it will be bigger than ur duck so."

"You do realise I can kill you. I fucking took over you're country."

"Yeah well."

"MAKE ME FUCKING  CCCCCCCCCCCCCRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!"

"You can cook so do it yourself." France sassy walked to the oven with gimmie more cupcakke and jiafei remix playing in the background.

Germany sighed really long. He was bored so he called russia. "Russia, where are you."

"Up your ass, fuck off and be patient. I have to transfer atom bombs to you're fucking country."

Germany whispered to himself, "Calm down fat bitch."

"I FUCKING HEARD THAT YOU SELFISH SAUSAGE-SUCKING ASSHOLE."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP I CAN LITERALLY INVADE YOUR WET ASS  COUNTRY SO DON'T FUCKING SPEAK."

"DON'T FUCKING TRY MESSING WITH ME. SHUT THE FUCK UP."

"THEN HANG UP YOU FUCKING COMMUNIST, DO YOU NOT KNOW WHERE THE BUTTON IS."

"WHY DIDN'T YOU HANG UP THEN IDIOT."

"OH MY GOD JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP LISTENING TO YOU MAKES ME WANT TO KILL MY SELF."

"THEN WHY THE FUCK DID YOU CALL ME. YOU'RE LUCKY I'M NOT IN RUSSIA RIGHT NOW OR ELSE I WOULD HAVE SENT COORDINATES TO MY FUCKING ARMY SO THEY BLOW UP YOU'RE HOUSE WITH ATOM BOMBS."

"You can certainly blow up my house with you're atom bomb 😏."

"......what do you mean by that."

"Nothing where are you anyway."

"I'M LITERALLY OUTSIDE YOU'RE HOUSE YOU DEAF FUCK, I KNOCKED LIKE 20 TIMES BUT YOU WERE PROBABLY TOO BUSY WITH YOU'RE SHITTY ECONOMY."

"YOU FUCKING COMMUNIS-"

France interrupted, "A-Allemagne ah~ yeah~ d-don't stop please~"

".....Germany what's going on behind the phone."

"Nothing France is being a whiny bitch."

"I think I came at the wrong time."

"No you didn't France is just....France."

"OK well just open the door."

But germany was a little distracted behind the phone. "Shut up France I'm on the phone - I can't w-when you're being so... - If you don't stop that I will take away milk deliveries from you're country - then I'll just have yours - oh my fucking ggggggggggggoooooooooooooodddddddddddddd!!"

"GERMANY LET ME THE FUCK IN OR I'LL BREAK DOWN YOUR DOOR!!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP I HAVE TO DEAL WITH FRANCE!!"

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT IT'S FUCKING COLD!!!

"LOOK AT YOU'RE COUNTRY'S CLIMATE THEN COME BACK TO ME AND SAY THE SAME THING!!"

"I DON'T FUCKING CARE LET ME IN!!" Russia started banging at the door like a mad man or some shit. France was refusing to make crepes for Germany and he was currently trying to get him to shut the fuck up and make it.

"FRANCE IF YOU DON'T MAKE MY FUCKING CREPES I'LL FUCK YOU."

"That's a reward."

"THEN I'LL WHIP YOU, YOU'LL BLEEDING TO DEATH."

"Oh yes make be bleed."

"I am now forever traumatised, just go make me crepes."

"Fine I have nothing to do anyway."

Then the door broke down and they could hear loud footsteps.

"Германия!  Я собирался подарить вам атомные бомбы, а вы меня не пустили!!"

"Russia please don't eat us."

"I couldn't care less about you, anyways your atom bomb is coming in a few hours."

"Why are you here?"

"I'm bored and I've already fucked the baltics and I'm still bored."

"You already what."

"Never mind I came here to give you the team and conditions of ordering an atom bomb from my country." Russia gave a massive, really long paper to Germany.

It read, Before you confirm your purchase of transferring 50 atom bombs to your country from Russia. You must read the terms and conditions of your purchase.
-We are not responsible for any damage done from the bomb
-We are not responsible for any death and/or injuries done
-Make sure you treat this with absolute care and be mature with what you do with it.

The bombs must be kept away from any flammable and electric equipment. Keep the bombs away from the reach of children and they must be kept responsibly in a safe place.

YOU ABSOLUTLY MUST KEEP IT UNDER SAFE AND STABLE CONDITIONS!!

So Germany said the most logical thing. "France...when the atom bombs arrive...take one and shove it in the crepe and Russia, how big are they."

"Why do you want to know how big the bombs are."

"No reason."

"Германия, why is France here?"

"Its a very long story."

"That's great, I'm hungry give me those crepes."

Germany slammed his hands on the table. "HE IS MY SERVANT AND YOU DON'T GET ANY."

"My my Germany, stop acting like that, I don't want to leave with an empty stomach."

"Fuck you and you're empty stomach, why are you even here."

"Germany...I don't care about what you want and all I want is crepes."

"Shut the fuck up you moron and choke on my dick you fat ass."

"I definitely won't be chocking on your 2 inch."

"You can't say much, I saw a pic of your dick on your twitter post. Bro is like under an inch."

"You can't fucking say much either you weak whore. You failed to invade my country and also what make you think you can invade russia you stupid cock sucking turd, your government is clearly fucked. Your parents need to shove some sense up your ass."

"Are you a walking piece of shit, we don't have parents you dusty bitch. Have you living under a rock? To your daily life in your country you've probably been living in a prison."

"Don't fucking call me that you gay ass hoe I swear to god I will literally drag you to my basement and shove a pipe up your ass."

"I'd like to see you try you wet ass bitch."

"I already have."

"Also aren't you and France allies are you not going to get him out."

"I said I'm hungry all I want is crepes."

"Fucking starve."

"That makes me wonder how you're army is doing in stalingrad."

Then germany had a break down and started crying on the floor. "No my armyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!"

"Oh my fucking god."

"Russia, Germany....you're crepes.." France shoved the crepes infront of them on the table.

Then russia said, "Oh thank you france, food from you're country is better than from that one over there."

Germany was mad but just left Russia alone and they started eating crepes.

Chapter Text

Germany and russia were giving death startes while eating. Then Germany was all like 'I'm going to make this mf horny because I'm bored'

So then the blonde dude started eTing his crepes in a very sexual way. So bacically, he took maple syrup and poured it on the thing. And then took he fork and stabbed it, then he shoved it on his mouth. He didn't eat it though because like yeh. Then the syrup went like down his chin and around his mouth and stuff. Then he looked at russia and started making some very sus noises. Then he ate the thing. He licked his lips and said, "It was so tasty~." (10/10 grammer)

"What the fuck was that?"

"What? It was so delicious...and I want more."

"...Just eat."

Then season 1 eren jaeger flew through the window and broke it. Germany was very angry because he broke the WINDOW! So he went up to eren jaeger and said, "WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU HERE."

Then eren said, "No....If we want to live we need to fight! fight! Fiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhtttttttttt!!!"

"you'd better be fighting your way into your bank account to pay for my fucking window!"

"I don't care."

"Where is you're dad?"

"...."

"I'm sorry for saying these things....i know you're german."

"I know but like I just realised that this isn't my universe."

"Yeah, this isn't a crossover fanfiction."

"Ok bye." Eren jaeger teleported back to the aot universe.

Russia then said to Germany, "You just bullied an orphan how do you feel."

"shut up no one asked you to speak."

"You wanna go?!"

"Fine then let's fight, but we should take this somewhere else."

"Where then?"

"The bedroom of course...unless you want to do it here~"

"Oh that would be such a perfect place."

"mmhhm, do you want to go now. I don't think I can wait any longer~"

"There is no need to rush...we have all day."

So they went to the guest bedroom because it was the cleanest part of the house. And also because japan and italy caught that virus and they were in the other room.
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"PILLOW FIGHT!!!!"

So basically germany and russia were still angry with each other so it was kinda agressive. Russia almost died. For some shitty reason, germany has over 100 pillows in the guest room because he keeps taking them to his basement and doing science experiments. He wasn't really doing science experiments with those pillows anyway - he was either humping them aggressively or roleplaying with them (it is rumoured that if you interrupt germany when he is with the pillows, he will shove them where the sun don't shine).

So back to the fight, russia grabbed like the biggest pillow and cutely attempted to suffocate Germany. "Германия, time to die."

Germany instantly built a giant pillow panzer in like 2 seconds, complete with the german cross and nazee flag. Russia managed to built the same thing but with russin stuff. It had klobasa, vodka and even the ussr anthem was playing in the background.

Russia was jealous because gemrnay's tank looked way cooler than his. So he shoved pillows in some tube that happened to be there and shot at germany's tank. Germny was like, no bitch ur not going to destroy my sexy tank. Instead of shooting pillows at the emo guy with white hair, he shot....
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...A bottle full of semen that is next to his bed....
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Also pillows...but they had germany flag on it. Russia's tank was bad so pillow fortress fucked and pillows went everywhere. "N-no I don't understand.....my tank...i made the shooting thing extra long so u can shove it in Germany's ass." so then he started crying.

Germany said, "you have no power when it comes between my panzer and my cock."

"b-but..."

"no buts I'm going to fuck u."

"no"

"Yes"

"You can't"

"why"

"because my ass is so cold there is a war going on."

"I don't care I'm going to put my wurst in your sandwich (or whatever it you shove sausages in)"

"no"

Russia somehow managed to get a vodka bottle and shove it up grrmHy ass. "Nooooooooooooooo my perfect fat ass!!"

Rusa aggressively thrusted the bottle in and out of his ass, buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut gremnay was not weak 🙀 he used his super seacret winx powers and transformed into a fairy. And shoved a mini german ww2 tank action figure up russia's ass.

It turns out that russia's ass was cold. It fucking froze the action figure. Germany was really angry because it was one of his favourites.

"wtf when u shit does it come out frozen or something?"

"I use...a method."

Then they stopped everything. And sexually looked and each other and said, "okay, now let's fuck."

Russia got up. "RUSSIA MAGIC WINX!!!!" (winx club season 2 transformation song starts playing)

"You need a winx transformation to get naked?"

"Shut up before I get my big klobasa and shove it deep inside ur country."

"Fuck off before I show u my military power."

Russia got up and looked germany in the eye before doing something very bad. HE SHOVED HIS 'KLOBASA' IN GERMANY TIGHT PHAT ASS.!!! 🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦

"holy Scheiße! Get you're greasy meat out of my smexy sandwich 😡👿"

"no lol" So russia was fuxking germany and it was really hot cuz Germany got that everything because some people simp for him. But germamy says NO!  he used his magical powers to defend himself.

"IN GERMANY YOU BUY 1 LETRE OF PETROL FOR €2, BUT BY MY WURST IS FAR MORE SUPERIOR THAN THAT! IT IS THE WORLD'S GRATEST MEEEEAAAAL!! MY TASTY WURST DOESN'T COMPARE TO UR GREESY KLOBASA! NOW, I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT REAL CONCENTRATION LOOKS LIKE FOOL! TAKE THIS! GERMAN BEER OVERDRIVEEEEEEEEE!!" German used his powers to sexually take control of Russia and now he was invading russia 🙀

"I wanna shove my cold fingers up ur ass so bad. It will feel x696969696969696969696969696966666666699999966969696966996696996969696969696996999969969696969696966966999699696966969699699699669! 69969969969999996969996 better than this."

"Oh ja. Thts so hot i wana do 96."

"69"

So bacically they did 69 and france did the grape in microwave experiment and blew up the microwave.

Chapter Text

Meanwhile in the Americas, Canada was testing how many ovens it takes to burn down the white House. But unfortunately he couldn't do it because it wasn't August 24, 1814.

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT, now he was a shy cute gay man with abs and muscles. And he doesn't like America being mean to him. He is very sensitive 😖. So he walked to America's house.

When he got into America, apparently they had to do a check to see if he has a deep connection with large vibrating door handles. He knocked on american's door. But that fatass was on his sofa watching soviet x reich countryhuman edits. So he used his seacret magic to transform into a maple leaf and slide under his door he was becoming james bond. He WAS 007 hHSHAJJHHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. But anyway he has to stalk his adopted brother. He jumped his brother and said, "OK FAT LAZY SONOVABITCH I CHALENGE U TO A DANCE BATTLE TO SEE WHO IS HOT."

"the hot thing is that ontario is inside of me. Shit! I can even feel it so hot."

"I don't care let's dance."

"k"

Canada pulled an 80s boom box from his ass and put on ke$ha. Amereca got off his lazy ass and started twerking. "you're maple syrup and Poutine won't save u from this."

Canada pulled out his seacret technique. "MAPLE ASS!!!!" Canda used awesome powers so make america loose. He was full on break dancing and everything. He even managed to crack the floor.

America gasped in mean girl and he was like not going to let canada win because yeah. So then he used technique."WITH THE SMEXY POWER  OF THE 50 STARS!! I WILL TOTALLY FUCK U WITH STARBUCKS!!

Merica transformed into a demon/half wolf/poor/popular/fallen angel/lost princes/shy/gets bullied/mum died when was a kid/gets abused by family/fake smile. Canda then got tired and turned off music then went up to america and whispered. "healthcare?"

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!"

America woke up in his bed sweating like he just had sex. Speaking of seggs, america has a bulgy wulgy uwu 👉👈 😖. He got up from his bed and walked over to Canada's house in his pyjamas and his massive teddy bear that was almost the same height as him. He rung the doorbell and when canada didn't answer in 0.002 seconds he started banging on the door because he was an impatient little shit.

Canada came out like 7 seconds later and he was really mad because America disturbed him from watching boku no pico 😠. He saw america standing like some uwu girl and he said, "Oh fuck not u again."

"Canada I had a nightmare uwu 😖😭"

"What was it my baka dirt bag 😽😼😞😢?"

"Y-y-y-you w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-were...w-were bullying me uwu a-a-A-and I was scared 😔😟😰"

"Come in my kawaii littler box...I'll protect u from the worms 😉😏"

So america walked in the house and jumped on canada's bed and went to sleep instantly. It was like 5am in the morning so canada decided to fuck off and make pancakes like his gay father france taught him.

He added a special ingredient into America's pancaks. It was half a litre of cum 😰. But it wasn't any ordinary cum. It was cum from the anime version of Colonel Sanders. If america tries 1 atom of this then....things will happen....things that are....horny. But yeah so amrica woke up and smelt pancakes. He ran to the kitchen like scooby doo and ate the cum pancake 😰😱.

Then Americas brain recalculated and the next thing u know was that he was wearing micheal jackson clothes and doing the moonwalk to the bathroom to take a shit. Kfc's cum is toxic apparently and it gives u either the uwu infection that germany had to deal with in the last 6 chapters, the ability to speak russian with the power of the soviet onion and emo belarus or it turns u into micheal jackson and u moonwalk to the bathroom to take a shit.

So then canada got bored and went to YouTube and searched 'Angry german kid parodies' and then he found the video titled 'Hitler babysits angry german kid' (that is an actual video, watch it, its so funny after 20 times seeing it) and started watching.

Meanwhile America looked at himself in the mirrow while trying to resist shoving the bottle of shaving cream in his ass. He sighed and said one thing, "I smell the Japanese coming in with their planes to pearl harbour." he aggressively sniffed the air.

"First we threw tea bags in the water, next is manga."

Chapter Text

Japain was on his way to cutely blow up America's ships and stuff. He managed to break free of Germany's room because germany and russia were fucking and it went wrong. Everything in the house started bouncing because of the aggressiveness. Italy was on the bed when this happened. He was asleep in peace but then everything started jumping. Even the window broke. Italy was bacically being thrown into the air. Then the chandelier above poked his arm. (the chandelier was 5 meters above him) then Italy started whining and it woke japan up, and they were bored and didn't want to get killed by bounching furniture. Japan and italy went out through the broken window.

Japan then was like, "Hey itary do you want to bl(r)ow up Pearl Harbour."

"No, I want to hump my body pillow of naked england."

"sure, whatever."

So now Japan was on his way. He really wanted to blow up America's boats because he was too busy chucking oil at this hour.

When jaoan got there his plane had malfunctions and he landed in America's house. He moaned sexually as he felt the plane 'enter' the warm, tight heat of the house. "Oh you're ass feel so good house-san"

Then America came out the house with canada. "OMG IT'S JAPAAN WHATERYOUDOENHERRE!!?"

"I-I'm here to bl(r)ow up your ships!"

"ya well dude if you wana blow up ma ships then you caaant"

"why."

"because dude I beddur than u"

So japan's plane woke up and turned 180 and went to Pearl Harbour.

"Yo dude thats so not cool, you're vandalising my property"

"suck my samurai sword."

America and Canada looked up into the sky while japan's plane was flying and apparently dancing 'now watch me whip now watch me nay nay'

"yo canada dude bro you gotta like help me and stop japan" America looked at canada and got very close to him. And there bodies were touching yeah.

"lol no its aboot time you get fucked."

"whad 🤯!!"

"It's not my land bye bitch"

"*inhales* omg duuuuuuuuuuuuuuddddddddddddddddddddddddeeeeeeeeeee noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!"

Then canada laughed at him and then watch me started playing (or whatever that song is called I'm not bothered to find out) and canada started dancing.

Now watch me whip
Watch me nay nay
Now watch me whip whip
Watch me nay nay

Now watch me whip
Watch me nay nay
Now watch me whip whip
Watch me nay nay

*Canada starts break dancing at this point*

Ooh watch me watch me
Ooh watch me watch me
Ooh watch me watch me
Ooh ooh ooh ooh

Ooh watch me watch me
Ooh watch me watch me
Ooh watch me watch me
Ooh ooh ooh ooh

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah"

America was screaming and crying.

Then canda said very inspiring words to his brother. "America, you may be a stupid ugly piece of shit, but you have boats to protect, go forward you slutty pig!" *pretend there are echoes*

And then america starts crying and drops to his knees, "yees canada bro, ill do it for you."

"good" then canada disappears and left behind a 1 litre bottle of maple syrup. 'I can't be a lazy piece of shit, I gotta protect my harbour!'

So america then ran to some plane department or wherever the fuck they keep planes. He went up to the guy who looks like the guy who froze to death and drowned in the titanic. "Hey yo I need a plane real fast bro, the Japanese are gonna attack fast bro, peel Harbur ya know bro bro."

"yaaaaaaaaaaaassssss"

Then James charles walked up to America while he was getting in the plane. "slay sister *kiss sound*"

"ya bro"

So america went in the plane and everyone cheered him. And then america said inspirational message to his people. "I WILL DO IT FOR THE MOTHERLAND OR FARTHERLAND IDK WHAT THE GENDER OF GIANT ROCKS ARE, I'LL DO IT FOR JORGE WASHINGMACHINE!!!!!"

and then some of the people were even crying when america took off. Then the song 'bad boy by Cascada' starts playing and America felt magestic.

So then he made it to pearl harbuor and he saw japan leaning against his plane with arms and looking cool. Ameririca landed his plane next to his plane and he folded his arms and did the same thing as japan.

"You arrive, took you l(r)ong enough."

"yeah, japan bro"

Chapter Text

"yeah, japan bro"

America walked up to Japan and put his super cool sunglasses and blasted the song 'evacuate the dance floor' by cascada on full volume.

"so u think yall can come here and blow up ma ships bro."

"You need a shower america, why is it every time is see you, you smell l(r)ike dick"

"cuz dude I'm straighter than the tower of pisa in Italy"

"that tower isn't straight."

".......anyways I'm going to fight you."

But then the music got to the best part. "ya know what" then america danced a bit.

"let's fucking party."

Since it was like 7 or 8 in the morning it was still kinda dark so they used that red, long tnt sticks and light it up so they could use it as glow sticks and they could wave them around.

"u know what america, this is the shit"

"Ikr bro wanna party and get drunk and then totally regret everything later bro"

"Yes"

So then they went into one of those large shipping boats and America used his gun to shoot the locks on the giant blue box. "America, is this the alcohol"

"ya bro" And yeah it was alcohol. America aggressively grabbed 4 bottles and gave 2 to Japan. After half of the first bottle, japan got really drunk. He started taking his shirt off. And America saw his really hot muscles and abs, and America started blushing like those short anime girls. After the 2nd bottle america got naked and threw his clothes next to him. He walked up to japan and unbuttoned his trousers along with his boxers. And stared at japan's erect dikc. And since he was drunk, he didn't know what the fuck he was doing to he started deepthroating japan's fat cock.

"Oh yeah America, suck my dick l(r)ike an extra l(r)arge mil(r)kshake."

So america sucked his dick and japan commed in his throat and he swallowed because he was drunk right now and he actually thought it was milkshake he was sucking and drinking.

Then america turned around, bent over and let japan smack his ass. And cuz japan was drunk he shoved his dick in the American's tight ass. "oh~ yeah~ japan fuck my slutty greedy ass."

And yeah so japan fucked America. They continued fucking until they passed out.

*

After like an hour, japan woke up with a headache. Then he needed to throw up so he ran to the edge of the boat and threw up. After he was done, he realised he was naked so he found his clothes and put them on like a normal fucking person would. Then he saw America naked and found out something.

"HOLY SHIT I HAD SEX WITH A FUCKING DUMBASS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

Then america got resurrected and walked over to his clothes like a zombie and put them on, also like a zombie. He looked like he just shit out of the other end.

"yo Japan dude that was fun yall got so drunk lol ahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahaah"

"merica wtf where are we.'

Only now they realised that they were on some shipment boat and they didn't even know where they were going. America normally felt sea sick but already felt suck from alcohol. Well at least they had a boom box there. America pulled out his ke$ha album and started playing blah blah blah.

And America was full on vibing becauss it was his favourite song. Japan also decided to shut up and dance too. So they were having a party and then canada spawned from a maple syrup bottle that happened to be there for some reason.

"Oh yeah this song is the shit! Yeeesss ke$ha!! Woooo!!"

And those three were partying while the boat was taking them somewhere.

After another hour, the boat came to a Dock and it wasn't Pearl harbor.

"America, Canada, are we in."

"yeah bro I think we are."

"holy maple helecopter, we're in-"

Chapter Text

"Holy maple, we're in-"

"您好，欢迎来到中国，我希望您在这里提供性玩具和德国身体枕头!!"

Then a guy in red and with black hair came up to them from behind.

"WTF CHINaaaaaaaaa" canda, america and japan almost shit themselves and canada was almost about to turn back into a maple syrup bottle.

"did you guys come here to see me, that so sweet"

Then japan walked up to china and looked him dead in the eyes and then he siad, "*breathes in*what the fuck are you doing here, slutty dolphin"

"I'm here to collect ur nearest children 😄"

"yo dud china homie, ya can't just go around kidnaping kids bro, so not cool dude like maybe u go mcdonalds or what I mean like a-"

"Fuck off pig."

*everone gasps*

Then America started turning into an angry emo demon Princess. "China what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuccccccck!"

China said "It's true lol anyway. You ugly dust bags have no where to go."

"wad ya meen dude?"

"You will be my slaves." China laughed a bit.

Then japan grabbed America and Canada's hand and said, "you'll never take us alive, homeless prostitute!" and then he ran.

China was shocked, "Okay you've crossed the line fucking greesy haircut! I'm coming for you!"

China started chasing them. They were running in the docks. It was easy for them to loose china for like 5 seconds then he appeared. Japan then threw himself and the other two into some random container that had a hole in it. So they  tried to get into the hole. Which was kida a problem actually. So canada had a fat ass so America and Japan grabbed his ass and pushed it really hard. And then it went in after 5 tries. Next was america, his ass was even fatter. It was 2x bigger than the hole so canada pulled his arms and japan pushed his ass but it wouldn't move! Japan heard China's voice from the corner and he was getting closer. Japan was sweating. "wow, america you reall(r)y have a fat ass!" Japan got tied and kicked America's ass and then america was flying in. Canada almost suffocated. Then Japan went in very nicely but he still had kind of a fat ass tho.

So the were hiding in there for idk like an hour and they though they lost china so they crawled out. This time the hole was bigger so they can go out.

"Okay guys, I think we are fine." said canada.
But noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Some random people jumped them and pinned them to the floor. Then china walked up to them really slowly.

"ha! Assholes! I caught you You fucking idiots and now you are going to be my fuck slaves. America will ride my dick while I finger japan and canada. AhahahahahahzhhzhhHhzhahahhahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahhahahah!"

Then america said, "I won't let you do this."

"You don't have to let me do this, I will do this. However I will make you go to school."

"dude wad the actual fuck I'm like 19 bro school ain't for me dog"

"Fuck off you are going to go to school in this country. With a shit load of homework." china smiled.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!,!!,,,,,,,,.....!"

"Shut up or ill depot you to russia and he will have a lot of fun with you three especially u america."

Then japan said, "but....russia is at germany house."

"why the fuck would he be at germany 's House?"

"long story"

"anyways I don't care you will be going to my house and I'm going to get u to school."

"shit"

So they walked to China's car and drove to his house. So 2 hours later they were there.

"Ok you three hot sweaty sex toys that I will make out with. This is the house."

OK it actually looked nice. It wasn't even a house tho it was a apartment but it was really high tho. And it looked rich. The view was good because the city looked so nice but when it was night then yeah it good.

"so get into your clothes!" china threw  cat ears and a tail that u shove up ur ass and some stripper's clothes."

" uuuuuugggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!"

Chapter Text

China walked through the door. "OMG like get up ur so lazy and drunk"

So chin a forced america, Canada and japan to sleep in this one room. A big bed but not as big as my ass (not irl). there were no Intimate shit going on because they were sleepy so.

"wake up you filthy whores before I poke ur eyes out."

America, Japan and canada woke up like one of those cartoon people.

"Now that ur awake......you're going to school as I said last chapter, I think."

"yo dude, listen to me bro...I'm not going to ur homeless school"

"Whatevaaaar 🙄 💅"

China somehow managed to drag their asses down the stairs and put on some clothes or uniform or whatever.
"You are going to school motherfuckers!"

"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo"

"If you scream in my face america then you die." China looked at america and almost turned into a furry.

America went on his knees and started crying and tried to rip off china's clothes. "P-p-p-p-please uwu don't send me to schwool owo"

China whisped at america, "free healthcare"

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

"Shut up 10 minutes or death all of you" then he slammed the door and fell down the stairs.

-time skip to inside school-

America, Canaad and japan walked d down tbe hallway and they saw some girls walking towards them. They posed and America, Canada and japan posed aswell.
"can u get out of th e way?"

America stood in tbe middle cuz he was like the shit and he said, no

Everyone was shocked and started crying. The mean girl was angry asf so she went up to america and then the bell rang.

Canada was like fuck this and transformed into maple syrup bottle. Japan was like "Lets escape."

But they got caught in 0.1 seconds by some random man who shoved them into some music classroom.

"OK PPL I WANT TO HEAR YOUR SEXY VOICES REALLY LOUDLY LIKE UR BEING MOLESTED IN THE BACK OF MY VAN!!!!!"

Everyone was singing except for America cuz he didn't want to. So bacically he stared at his nails like a spoilt princess. The teacher was man and got on the floor like a worm and slithered to america. Then he stood up and started aggressively at the little bitch.

"WHY CAN I NOT HEAR YOU!"

"idk ur deaf or something dude like I was totally singing."

"UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NO."

"ya"

"IF I DON'T HEAR SHIT FROM U I WILL STAB U CUTELY!!"

"OK fine dude."

OK so basically everyone almost dropped dead cuz like they almost die and so yeah.

"OK children so the class is over so here is 100.2 sheets of homework."

Everyone dropped died eccept for the 3 nations. Japan, Canada and America groaned like this, "UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

The teacher was pissed asf and he was having non e of this criminal behaviour. "Don't ugh and me, double homework!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

"TRIPPE  HOMEWORK"

Canada got on his knees and played initial d station to station and when the intense part started playing, he spun around on all fours really slowly. America and Japan immediately transformed and switched everything.

"STATION TO STATION BUILT WITH EMOTION WANNA LEAD THE NEW REVOLUTION!"

Then they all transformend into winx club faries but they looked like jjba characters. They started twerking agressively and doing cringey tiktok dances. The teacher wasn't a bitch boy so he transformed into an block of cheese with arms and legs.

The trio gasped in horror as they started at this mythical creature. Japna was like, "Oh no its cheese-san we have no luck of winning."

Canada almost had a heart attack. "c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-hease-s-s-s-s-san?" he almost pissed himself cuz thts how scared he was.

The cheese said wise words to them three, "If have ass, u got class. If you have tits, you don't have nits. If u have a cock, you're in shock because the greatest power of them all is three gay bitches coming together." and then he disappeared.

"Oh wow" , the three gay bitches said, "we saw cheese-san in person Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

They started jumping around and screaming like fangirls. Then they walked out the class like a model. Then they were walking down the stairs when canada suddenly tripple but someone caught him just in time. It was Levi Ackerman, the guy who was literally dating half of the female population in our school. He stared at canada's lips as he pulled him close.

"You're lips look lonely, do they wanna meet mine."

"Please get off me." canada pushed the angry minion and he almost fell.

"Woah, easy there baby girl."

"I'd rather kiss a trash can btw oh wait, what's the difference."

Canada smiled at seeing the shocked look on Levi's face. Walking away, Japan almost tripped over a random calculator someone had left on the floor. Japn dropped his booked and before he could pick them up, someone was doing it for him.

"You should watch ur step next time princess." For a second, Japan was stunned to see Bruno Mars. The guy with the biggest Instagram following he was grinning at japan and boy does he look like a Prince.

"Do you mind taking a picture of me for my insta?" He pushed his phone and started posing like he was god's gift to women.

Japan didn't know how to react so he put his phone down and awkwardly walked away to find an empty classroom. As they walked in, they was supprised to see someone sleeping in there. America shook his shoulder to wake him up only to gasp when he realised it was Joe Biden, the handsome sleepyhead.

"What are you doing here, this is our place?"

"Oh sorry I didnt see your name on the door."

America ignored his sarcasm and they were about to get out before he spoke again. "We can share this room if you want."

Suddenly the teacher came in and thought they were making out in there or something. She kicked them out and it was so embarrassing. Even more than all the tripping over. They had to avoid these heartbreaks. They (Levi, Bruno Mars, Joe Biden) were called the tripple threat for a reason.

Ok so then japan, merica and canada went to a maths classroom and japn instantly knew some shit was fucked. He picked up a piece of paper and found cocaine. 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 *u as the reader need to scream really loud*

Then some random teacher walked in and see was angry an d almost threw his sandwich is the sky. "WHY ARE U SEEING MY COCAUN!!!"

Hedragged canada on the floor with his face down and took him to the janitors clauset. Japan and America followed them but japan dropped to the floor and he started vibrating on the floor.

The teacher saw this shit and started screaming and running to get the principal like a titan. And some short uwu pick me girl was screaming in the back.

The janitor came out of some room. And looked at this fucked up shit. Then the teacher came back with the principal who was fucked as fuck. He pulled a phone out of his ass and called 911 and told them the mess.

The police were taking so fucking long  it was bacically like they stopped at mcdonalds. Japan was vibration on the floor and America put on the boom box and played 'beep beep im a sheep' and did the innopropriate minus 8 version.

The principal was fucking mad and screamed at his phone. "WHERE THE FUCK ARE U SOMEONE IS DYING HERE!!!"

The teacher in the back gave up on herself and started drinking alcohol while the woman next to him started vaping like year 10s in school toilets.

"Did you build the school like a fucking prison, why tf is the door so tight?"

"Its identical to my ass."

"....."

"ANYWAY Hury up like some kid is dying right now so like come here pls."

"OPEN. THE FUCKING. DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR!!!!" They started banging on the door so aggressively like they were going to see the next season of hetalia in there.

The door turned into a sexy brown man with abs and muscles and he looks like from yaoi porn games. The teacher were stunned to see this shit. "That hurt you know" said the sexy brown man with abs and muscles in a really deep voice like he was smoking since birth.

"OH MASTER SORRY FOR BEING A DISOBEDIENT PUPPY 😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖"

"You all deserve to be punished." and the police people saw the man's erection. The door man was naked btw cuz doors don't wear clothes. And they suck his cock and done nasty shit while the gardener next door was recording. The gardener next door happened to be south Korea. Anyway they wer e fucked really hard for like ten minutes.

And instead of breaking the door, these gay police people broke the window and ran to wherever. They found japan, screaming uwu girl, alcoholic teachers and a stripper. Then south Korea ran into the thing and America started hugging him.

"aaaaaaas everyone is horny and I'm the only person who doesn't have gaga reflexes." America was crying like a little bitch again.

South Korea started dancing and smrrica joined with him. They were doing the whip now watch me ne ne song thing.

Then china walked in and was like, 为什么你们要搞砸我的学校?!" He was really pissed.

Japan went back to normal. South Korea, Canada, Japan and America came together with their sexy magic at full potential.

"MAGIIIIIIIIIIIIIICC HETALIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA."

They aimed their powers on china and china turned into a chibi (not a child, he bacically went shorter or some shit) America picked up the tiny China and started playing with him like creepy man.
"Put me down greesy american!"

"no ahahhahahahhahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahhahahhaha ur so cute"

Then all of them went in the janitors clauset and found a bomb but it doesn't kill people. Japan accidentally stepped on a switch and the bomb sent them flying 500mph like a rocket and they landed in the counrty......

Chapter Text

Germanee ran into his house and slammed the door. He had to be really quiet now cuz like he instantly smelled an intruder in his mansion. He dropped down on all fours and started walking like an injured dog to the human. He started growling and drool was in his mouth. He literally looked like he was doing lines of coke.

Germany felt his furry form take over his asshole. He shit out a wolf tail and grew ears. It was so much pain that he  almost googled 'how to do Justin bieber hairstyle tutorial'. His tail was red and green like Christmas stuff. And very furry. He started barking and licking the floor and bit his tail which made him cry like a spoilt gacha life baby. He ran to the smeel.

He FOUND A PERSON IN HIS BEDROOM. Yes, on the nasty, unused 19th century victorian bed was england. He was lying down like a starfish and when he saw germany, he got up and started playing a very historic, symbolic, cultural, educational, important, glorious song.

(This song btw) - https://youtu.be/uh5yRqQapLs

Germany was hitting the griddy and shaking his musty tail infront of his teddy bear that italy made for him. England was twerking his flat pancake ass and almost broke his neck doing a cart wheel. He threw his shirt off and hit the griddy. He put the song so loud that the 90 year old grandma in Austria heard and started dancing like she was 19. Germany looked into england's eyes and they made out sexually. "OH MY GERMANY THO SHALL NOT HIT THE GRIDDY WHEN FRANCE BRETHES. LET'S FUCK!"
so yea they did.

Romano, Italy, china and France came out the cupboard. Romano almost broke his spinal cord trying to fit in the tiny ass amazon box. Then Christmas trees spawned from the floor and one went up France's asshole. 😔😔😔😔😔😔😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️😟😟😟😟😟😟😟😟😟😟. It was an emotional sight cuz he was stuck on there. Germany and England stopped fucking.

"MAGIC WINX CHRISTMAS VERSION!"

Romano and Italy jumped in the air and transformed into a full 5 minute winx transformation. They looked like washed up hookers and romano almost ate the floor. They flew up to the top of th e fucking tree where france was crying. They used all their magic and strength to get france off that tree and they fell on germany's bed with lots of force. That Germaby and England were thrown in the air 20mph and banged their heads in the ceiling and almost go t organ damage. But they didn't. The force of the ceiling made england grow tinkerbell wings out of his ass and grew a rabbit tail from his ass. Then they fell down because gravity.

"Damn germany you wanna suck on my bone😏😏😏." italy said.

"BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK. " Germany agrees.

"Damn england.......
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Wanna make an alliance😏😏😏😏" romano said.

"meow." yeah he agree.

France walked over to China with his ass still red. "Damn China pls give me some medicines 😏😏😏😏😏😏."

"no" he agreed.

So they all made a Christmas themed survival orgy. France brought the Christmas themed vibrators, cock rings, dildos and whatever the fuck he had shoved in his magical cheese handbag could fit.

Austria and prussia were knocking at the door. Prussia was dressed as a slutty raindeer and Austria was dressed in nothing. he was naked. Austria had prussia on a leash with a gag in mouth because prussia had the obsession of deepthroating everything and Barking non stop. That was not it. Prussia would dressed up like masha and crawled up the walls and was running around on the ceiling.

One time austria open the door to find prussia crawling on all fours like a demon. And had a 1 month out of date sausage in his mouth and was eating it like it was a four course meal with free refills. Then after he sucked the sausage and he started chocking so austria had to squeeze his throat so that bitch won't die. Then prussia ate it and hissed and austria and started crawling on the walls and through the vent back to his basement.

Anyway they were at the door and prussia was so excited to see germany that he kept a perfectly taken care off sausage for him. Austria got his trumpet gun and blast the door open cuz it was not answered. Austria heard strange noises from upstairs and ran with prussia. He found out that everyone in that room were fucking so aggressively like they were starving for 2 weeks and were fighting over a mcdonalds French fry on the floor next to a pile of dog shit. Germany was fingering china and china was fingering france and france was fingering italy and italy was fingering england and England was fingering germany. Yea There was a burning Christmas tree in the corner with a nuclear missile next to it. Austria pointed to the missile and ordered prussia to eat it and prussia did. Prussia didn't die cuz he is already deD technically.

Spain the pain decided to stop to shop at germany's haunted mansion of Christmas related sex and npc orgy simulator. He brought his bestie portugal. Portugal was an emo boy that wanted to go home to his discord kitten. They saw that the door was open and heard very suspiciously arousing noises from upstairs so they ran into the room and found a ww1 battle field. This was literally the exact copy of fucking fortnight battle royale videos that I see on the Internet that I don't care about and don't want to see. It was like that meowbahh hate on tiktok that happened.

Span took his shirt off, "¿Soy yo o realmente quiero empujar mi erección en todos sus traseros apretados, todo a la vez?" he took a Christmas tree ornament and fed it to Prussia who was shoving his fingers in his ass. Portugal got quirky like the freddy fazbear animatronics do at night when that music box song starts playing and the ur power is at 0 percent. He started hitting the griddy and doing cringy charli dimello tiktok dances from 2020.

"I SAY RIGHT FOOT-"

Apparently america threw a nuclear Christmas tree and it blew up with gas that made everyone instantly stop. They were dressed in tuxedos with a rolex and a limousine parked up outside. They all stood in a line next to each other and started walking in slow motion towards the door in timing with auto velocity and white flashes like capcut edits with the lady gaga government hooker slowed version playing in the back. They all exited in fashion and walked over to their sexy limousine. The driver was japan and greece was sleeping next to him. They were playing all I want for Christmas is you and it everyone was singing it. They each had presents in the car for them and they were so happy that they were dancing and almost brought out the drugs but japan said no. They put their windows down and were driving to Paris to have a big ass party.

Chapter Text

Austria shoves every single instrument up his ass. His ass was literally a whole ass luggage. This guy was able to get a grand piano up his ass. Anyway, he also had lube and cum everywhere. Like everywhere. But some people like to cum to his house.

The piano man right now was in his bathtub and listening to classical music with violins and shit. When the extreme violin part started playing he got horny and started touching himself. He picked up the two rubber ducks (the names are neopoleon and Tsar Alexander) and started roleplaying a cute uwu family friendly love story.

"Alexander...why...why did u leve me🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺?!!" Neopoleon shouted and the wind blow through hair and he cries.

Alexander stands like an npc and says nothing.

"ALEXANDER!!!!!" neopoleon's voice echos like 20 times and then the russia guy turned around very slowly like creepy horror movie.

"...neopoleon..."

"ALEXANDER UR A LIAR!! It could have been different!!!👿👿👿👿😡😡😡😡😢😢😢😢😢" Alexander starts tearing up and neopoleon has crying.

"I'm sorry...😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢" Emotional music starts playing in the background and austria starts crying and the bathtub got flooded up to his shoulders.

Neopoleon stares into his eyes and slowly turns around and walks away (goes underwater) and Alexander starts crying again and then chases neopoleon (also goes underwater).

"WAIT NEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNN!!!!" 😱😱😱😱

Neolopean doesn't stop.

"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN."

He turns around.

"You want to lie to me again?"👿

"no i-"

"Im with done with u and ur lies!"

"But...im sorry..."

"no...."😱😱😱😱😱 dramatic music starts playing and everything gets emotional and Austria's heart is beating really fast and blood is pumping a lot and he is turning red and he gonna have a nose bleed.

"It has happened way too mny times..its over." 😭😭😭😭😭😭😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔

The birds outside even start crying cuz this shit is more emotional than titanic.

"neopoleon do u trust me?" 🥺🥺

"no!"😡

"...."

"I told u its over."

"But we can start again ever since there is some image online of us kissing, u never been the same!" 😡😡😡😡😡

"me? I'm the problem!" 👿👿👿👿

"yes, u became an emo. Tiktoker and now u have stress and anxiety and u take it out on me" 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫

"Now ur lying agai n"

And then austria got bored with everything and he put the ducks very close to eachoyher until they were kis-

America, Japan, Canada, South Korea and mini china flew though the fucking window with a space airplane and the mini China landed in the sink which was also flooded. Mini China started drowning and violently splashing everywhere.

"Dont worry I will save u" Austria jumped out of the bathtub anime ninja style and ran over to the sink which was 1cm away.

Mini china wa s blushing so much like uwu girl. "y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-you save me alpha! 😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋"

"I did baba groll😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏🧓🧓🧓🧓🧓"

"Will u be my alpha uwu 😣😣😣😣😽😽😽😽"

"Anything for my kawaii smelly plastic bag."

Canada siad, "u guys are fucking gross and so is this fanfiction."  Canada bit his nails.

Cansda had enough and transformed into a mayple syrup bottle eh. Japan and south Korea was fucking dying rn. Japan was in the middle of a heart attack and south Korea didn't have a voice actor so he was mute. America got down on his knees and done cpr like cupcakke did. Japan got back to life and saw austria and mini China kissing and he fainted.

America went up to Austria cuz he was jelous that Austria was kissing HIS MINI CHINA!! 😠😠😠😠😠😠This was unexceptable behaviour. America tapped Austria on the back really hard and Austria's turned around. "Ur getting a bit too touchy touchy with my baby wayby😡🤬"

"VHAT ARE U TAKING ABOIT BITCH!"

"I see u getting it on with my kawaii baka." Ameirca moved closer to austria so he could touch his no no square. Austria put china next to the toothpaste and got touchy touchy with america.

"u wanna go?"

"ye"

Austria dragged America to his bedroom and pulled out the sex toys from his asshole. They were going to do very bad things. Austria had a big ass anal dildo and pulled americavs trousers down and shoved it up his ass. Ameirca was like no way fucker and pulled out a dildo called 'great American challenge' from thin air. Then the dildo transformed into a coat hanger and he stabbed Austria using emo depressed gacha life scenes from glmv. Austria got stabbed and was lying on the floor cuz he was dying I think. he looked up at the piano wallpaper and saw his gay life going to end. then he close his eyes but he didn't die cuz country don't die. so then Austria jumped up in the air and America was shocked cuz he should be dead. Austria squeezed America's fat ass. "Du denkst, dass du einen besseren Arsch hast als ich und du kannst Mini-China aus meinen fettigen Händen stehlen!!!!!!!" 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

America didn't k now what he said so yeah. But it was hot. And it was like a magical power because he became very sexually active.

Suddenly a pole appeared out of nowhere (the pole in that one hetalia musical) and lady gaga monster started playing and America felt like he was the leader of everything.

"Don't call me America. I've never seen one like that before."

"he ate my heart, he a a ate my heart-"

Austria's bedroom fell apart and everyone was teleported to Austria's basement strip club where prussia was. America took off his clothes and Japan stopped fainting and levetated in the air like he was possessed or some shit. Austria joined America on the pole and they started doing sexual dances and shit on the pole. South Korea was hyped and started fan girl screeming on mute. Japan was dancing to the music cuz everyone loves lady gaga songs.

Then Korea stopped dancing and noticed someone was missing and that bitch was Canada. So then South Korea grabbed the mayplr syrup bottle and rubbed it like a lamp for 5 minutes. Then there was a big ass sticky explosion everywhere and Korea didn't want to know what that big ass sticky explosion was made of. Canada appeared naked holding pancakes in his hands. They spawned back into the strip club room. There was only lik e prussua, aurtaia, America, Canada, Korea, Japan and mini China bit it look like there was like 100 ppl. They were lights everywhere and prussua was selling alcohol and beer. Canada got up on the stage with America and Austria and showed off his moves and everyone in the room was dancing in syth to the song and they were recording it.

Everyone was drunk asf and China started growing in more ways than one if u know what I mean. Then suddenly they were raided by the police because the old lady next door complained even though she was twerking her ass off to the song. There were 8 police men or some shit. They were all under arrest for being loud.

The police made them have separate cells and Canada and America didn't agree with that. They turned into furries and barked and bit the police ppl. And now Canada and America are separated and they feel depressed because they are brothers. And what the police don't know is that if they don't see each other in the next 4 hours then they will turn into nuclear missile and blow up the police station so they are gonna escape using roblox prison life and jailbreak methods.

Chapter Text

Ameica was running around the small cell thing on all fours and barking. He scratchd at the door really hard and bit the metal. He got really pissed off cuz they were in there for like 2 days with no food and anything so ya. Also they had to sleep on the floor like a slave. And yeaj

So then he was really deperssd and questioned his shitty lide choices. Then he remember that he can contact help 😱😱😱 cuz he remembered that England gave him a tiny microchip and Amercia put it inside his glasses and he can use tha to contavt england 🥺

BEEEEEP BEEEEEEP

"greetings who tf are u"

"England its me"

"I'm gonna hang up"

"no pls"

"OK what do u want"

"me and like 5 other ppl are in prisin and we are slaves pls save us"

"I'm not bailing u out cuz u robbed mcdinlands or did drugs"

"no I go to jail cuz I was party"

"that's the same thing"

"whatever pls help"

"no bitch I'm cooking"

"plsss and stop making  scones"

"I'm making Sundayroast dumb bitch"

"OK idc pls help us"

"no"

"I'll tell u what's in France's clauset"

"really"

"ok I'm cuming"

"good, bye mf"

"bye"

This song starts playing https://youtu.be/btPJPFnesV4

America was so happy that he started jumping aggressively and cracked the floor and then he fel down into Austria's room. Austria was so angry 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡((I put emoji so u know how angry he is🥰)

"what are u doing here" Austria gave him side eye and then America started hissing at him

"I fell"

"ugh I don't want to see u bitch"

Then the entire plaent stopped rotating and everyone was shocked even the air molecules stopped moving. Austria just.........................sweared? 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😞😞😞😞😞😞😞😞😞😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳

America almost had heart attac

"Austria.....t-t-t-t-t-t-t-his isn't u 💔😔"

"it the new me 🙄💅"

"no pls"

"yes"

"oh yeah I found out that England can save us btw"

"ok"

Then they started to take their clothes off and they had sex and America was bottom. The whole bed was squeeking so loud that everyone around almost became deaf. Everyone heard america moaning for like 4 hours. "yeaa~ Austiraaaaaaaaa~ fuck me harderrrr" said America

"Land der Berge, Land am Strome,
Land der Äcker, Land der Dome,
Land der Hämmer zukunftsreich!
Heimat großer Töchter und Söhne,
Volk begnadet für das Schöne,
Vielgerühmtes Österreich,
Vielgerühmtes Österreich!" said Austria.

So it was lunch time now I guess and America got China and Canada and japan with him and they were going to escape prison. So they beet up some police guy and took his key card thing and got into the place where they keep weapons. They took all the guns and Canada got a hammer. They got Austria and everyone and they went to the toilet and Canada used his maple syrup power and transformed into CANADA THE FARIY OF MAPLE SYRUP like winx club fairy. And he smashed the toilet. (roblox prison life 🥰

Then they crawled in the sewers. America was mad cuz he was last and he had Japan's ass in his face also he had claustrophobic. Then they heard a noise behind them and then America turned around and saw a crawling demon thing and the bones were broken and stuff.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" then they all started running/crawling  and crying.

Then they got to a dead end "t hi s is the end 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢"

Then a bright light came out of nowhere and england appeared and killed the demon 😜💅*lady gaga poker face slowed and reverb starts playing* engaland was dressed up as a victorian person ciel phantomhive. Then England broke the walls and made a tiny ass hole so that they can escape. They all got their asses stuck for like 5h but then they got onto englands flying ship that Peter pan made for him for some reason.  England put his sword in the air and started chanting some shit.

There were polices on the ground and they were shooting England's boat and England didn't like it. So England pulled out the cannons and blew up the police. The police was flying in the air with a big explosion behind them and England was laughing. Then some random ass helicopter came out of nowhere and started fucking up Englands boat. England was angry and got his fairy to fuck up the helicopter. But the helecopter shot a missle and blew up some of England's flying ship and bits of wood was flying  everywhere and Japan almost got stabbed in the head. Then the whole ship tilted to the side ways and everything started falling off and they had to grab onto the railings or some shit to hold onto. England was running across the boat with a big ass gun and blew up the two helecopters behind him. The helecopters catched on fire and blew up and smoke came from them and they died.

America and the people were hanging on for deer life. Then aurtria couldnt hold his hands and fell but America catch him. "America..."

"I will never let u go Austria" 😢😓

*explosion noises in background*

America was crying and holding Austria by the blue cloak thing. And he couldn't hold onto Austria anymore.

"pls u can't die, I love u😔"

"I know😔"

Then America let go of austrias thing and he fell into the abyss and some clouds I guess. In slow motion falling.
"no" Ameica was crying

Then the entire ship turned back to normal. England finally killed the police and every one was ok except for America. "guys where is aurtsia?" china asked.

"he's gone.." everyone turned to America.

"what do you mean he's gone?"

"he's dead."

Everyone went silenct and America started crying. Then the ship was so damaged that it rotated again but this time it was so fucked like they were going down. "WERE GONNA DIEEEE" Canada was sad.

They didn't die but they crashed next to some house in the middle of nowhere. They walked to the house and heard suspicious noises and knocked at the door. And they saw a flag of a country on the door and they were in Germany. 😱😱😨😨😨

Chapter Text

"omg guys" America moaned and looked at Germany's house.

They all walked in the house and heard loud banging because people in there were actually banging. They were suspicious and smelled the house and it smelled like America but no shower for 5 years. China almost passed out and was like

"呃，這他媽的是什麼味道，阿魯，聞起來像燒焦的混蛋"

It was coming from the room. The aggressiveness went louder and stronger and the whole house started to rotate like a rubix cube. Everyone was like ooooooo we gonna dieeee noooo. They were flying on every single direction in the room and England became unconsious for 2 seconds. They managed to get to one of the fucked up rooms. They found italy and he was fucking the creepy England plushie (the one with his arms folded). Itaky cut a hole in there and cum was leaking out like a lot of cum.

England was shocked and he got hornee, "Landriht 'land−right [is] orm¯æte [italy], yfel ðurfonfremian ûte ðêana rômian [sex]" (This is old english btw)

Italy has his leaning tower of pisa in full hardness and ready to invade some sexy english booty. England got naked and jumped on the carpet cuz the bed look like it was trampled over. England spread his legs and Italy drooled. "Sei così sexy che voglio scoparti così forte uwu"

England gasped at when italy said uwu. Oh no, there was an uwu visus going around. Italy put his tower of pisa inside Westminster or whatever and thrusted really fast and was panting like a dog while saying uwu under his breath.

"A-ah..no Italy has...uwu virus.."

Canada and korea saw the scene and became sexually frustrating and they stared making out. They took their clothes off and started fucking. China saw this and was shocked. He hid behind America, "A-a-a-a-a-a-a-ameeica...im scared alpha 😢👉👈💞💞"

America turned into a jojo character. "don't worry my little garbage cutie pie, alpha is here."

Another really aggressive bang came from Germany's room and everybody stopped. Except for Italy's cum going into England's ass but no one gives a shit abt that. Then there was an earthquake and the room vibrated like a vibrator. It was rotating 360 and they spun around.

They had to investigate. England, China, America, Japan got up and went but Italy dragged japan into the room like a demon.

Japan grabbed on to America's leg but America couldn't hold. America wasn't the alpha wolf man😢😢😢😢😢

"it's ok, I will be okay."

Japan got dragged into the abbys and America fingered himself. Moaning noises and uwu came from there. Then japan and itaky were on the floor on all fours. They started running/ crawling up to them really fast and America screamed so much that grandma in spain can hear. They ran out of the door and locked it. Steam came out of the room under the door. England licked the liquid. "Italys...cum..."

There was the word uwu written on the floor with the cum. "guys...the cause of the virus is italy's cum...😢🤯🤠😳"

Everyone was silent.

Americ screamed, "so no more sexy pasta sauce."

"no, we need to transform him into normal but first, let's get germnays"

Canada and korea were still fucking outside the door and korea cumed inside Canada and cNada is pregnant even though he has no vagina.

They go to Germany's room and see an entire ww67655889 battlefiels with guns and tanks from pillows. Germany and Russia are in the middle. Germany has about 5 pillows in his ass. The airplanes made of lube hit russia's head and Russia collapsed and went on the floor. Germany was like "lol" and then russia got super pissed off so he got up and shoved another pillow that hit Germany's Berlin.

France's ass was so stretched it was a rubber band and everyone was fucking that it smelled no one had no shower for 5 years. There was also crepes in the corner and America was so fucking hungry that he started eating it like a dog. Nam. Nam. Nam. (roblox sfx)

Canada started screaming which doesn't happen often unless he is inside someone's ass, "GUEYS WE FOUFN THE SOUCE OF THE PROBLEM! ITALY'S CUM. For some reason it didn't affect England hmm mmmmm."

They grabbed italy and pinned him to the bed and germany and Russia stopped fighting. They knew it was a serous situation and needed to be fixed. Itaky was so mad that he was kicking and screaming like a child with no iPad."Lasciatemi andare, piccole stronzette disgustose.  Afferrerò ognuno dei tuoi culi e li sbatterò mentre dormi.  E rimani incinta"

"QUICK ENGLAND SUCK HIM DRY!!"

"yes" England got on his hands and knees and started sucking italy off. Everyone was so scared if it was going to work. Romano and Spain walked in and they were so worried about italy. "Is my brother ok u beeches"

Canada replied, "W-we don't know...he is in danger..😭😭😭😭😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😣😣😣😣😣😣😞😞😞😞🔫"

Romano was worried and rushed over to italy. "italy pls calm down." he started crying. Spain was also crying beacuse idk. Everyone wanted this to work and they started hyping engalnd up and cheering.

"Ya England suck italy's cum yaaaaaaaa"

They started putting techno music from the 90s on for no reason. "GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO ENGLAND GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO WOOOO WOOOO WOOWOWOWIIWOWIEIWOWOOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW9W9WOW99W9W9W9W9WOWOOWOWOGOGOGOOGOGOGOGOOGOGOOG9F9G9G9G99G9F99GOGOGOOGOGOGOOGOGOOOGOG"

"SUCK ITALY'S DICK SUCK ITALYS DICK SUCK ITALY'S DICK SUCK ITALYS DICK SUCK ITALY'S DICK SUCK ITALYS DICK SUCK ITALY'S DICK SUCK ITALYS DICK PASTA SAUCE PASTA SAUCE YUM YUM"

England was very hyped. They were cheering when italy's pisa exploded and white stuff exploded everywhere and it looked like everyone gave italy a blow job except Romano because he was behind italy. Italy was shooting his cum forwards not backwards physics duh.

Everyone was crying in joy and congratulated England, France made some crepes for England.

Italy passed out during the volcanic disaster. China and Korea put Italy to bed and Japan stopped being insane because italy was ok so japan was ok yay.

A few hours later, Italy woke up and felt even more like a twink than he already was. He started smiling normally and acting innocent when everyone knows that he has naked body pillows under his bed. He started thinking about England because he fell in love with him because that's how it works. Italy woke up and walked downstairs where everyone was eating crepes. He sat down next to England. While blushing, he confessed his love for England and England said he loved him aswell. So they kissed. 💕

Eveyoene was like "awwww🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰" and took 700 pictures of them. Germany put on techno music again and eveyone was shaking their landmasses to the beat.

Then a ufo crashed into their house. Oh no

Chapter Text

Tony stepped out of the ufo and America turned into a submissive breedable fuck toy and blushed submissively. Recently, Tony has been in the gym and got a penis enlargement surgery in Turkey because it's the cheapest. He now has a 20 pack and drinks beer everyday.

"Fuck fuck bicthc hoe kill yourself hoe bich cich" Tony rizzred up America.

America blushed and trembled. "Oh...tony...you make my asshole poosay drip 7up"

Germany and Russia looked at this scene and wondered if it was a sign. It was strange that the ufo crashed now out of all places. They think something fishy is going on.

"hoe hoe hoe slag sket sket I will have sex with ur mum slag hoe hoe bitch bitch"

"guys Tony said he wants show us something he found" Tony goes back into the ufo and brings out a cage with...an Austria blow up sex doll??

"A...Austria..." America felt tears sting his eyes ass he ran to the cage. "Astirua...my alpha daddy...👉👈"

Tony pressed a button and the beast was released from the cage. America couldn't stop purring as Austrias six pack glistened in the evening glow. Nya ichi ne San nya arigato. America was dancing to try and rizz up the alpha but only the alpha could successfully rizz up anyone especially the fertile baba grils.

"oh Austria u look so sexy lets make out behind KFC" America pulled Austria by the tie and dragged him behind the wall. Tony was very angry becauee he wanted america all to himself and almost combusted becaue he was so mad.

"SLUT CUM BITCH BONTAGE FUCK PUSSY ASS TITS TITS BOOBIES CUM CUM MPREG SALIVA MPREG ENGLAND R34 CUM SLUT SLUT"

America turned around in shock. "Tony...why are you so men"

"CUM CUMC UM CUM CUMC UM UM CUMC UCMC UMC UCM"

"Tony! I would never cheat on u"

"pussy"

"t...tony pweese...dont leave me...pweeeseeeeeee" America did the big eyes thingy at him and Tony couldn't resist it but he was still angry.

"UR CHEATING ON ME RAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Russia stepped in to calm everyone down. "Calm down plz"

"no fuck u ur muscles are fake"

"Ok slenderman"

"I didn't get steroids from temu"

Grrrr. He was so mad and they had an arm wrestle.

"Whoever looses becomes a submissive fox girl" America shouted and everyone watched this grotesque behavior.

DING DING DIMG

Russia used all his power and made sure toe knee would loose but Tony got a random boner from looking at americas fat ass for more than 0.56 seconds and his boner ripped through his trousers boing-ed and sliced the table in half and touched russia's arm. Russia was disgusting by this appalling behaviour and screamed like a spoiled brat 2018 glmm. Russia jumped out of his chair and immediately lost. He was so mad.

Tony was cheering and Erica cheered for Tony. "bitch bitch fuck slut cum piss anal sex watersports omorashi"

"Don't insult the soviet union" Russia gave him the toxic alpha stare. Canada and China hugged eachother and trembled in fear, they started making out cuz they thought they were going to die. America hid behind Tony and starting shaking in his boots. England, Germany and Italy were making out threesomly. The rest of the characters which I forgot about are dry humping eachother.

Tony smiled cuz he wasn't a silly omega or beta. "cum hoe sket piss rule 34 https://myreadingmanga.info"

Russia was mad asf and his furry tail came out of his ass and he was about to start a war. His name tag thing also said russia/don't mess with me/depressed/bad boy/rich/cannot tame me/emo/broken/gym/hot/gets all the kittens/rich/popular but just then....
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Before they were about to fight....

A capsule fell out of the UFO and it cracked in half. Smoke came out of the capsule. And it was a lot and it was more smoke than school toilets after a group of year 9s gave head to a flavoured crayon. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked over at the capsule. America saw a hand...a very familiar hand...it was the same hand that...was inside him.

The blonde rushed towards the broken capuel and pulled on the hand which revealed an arm and then an entire naked man. America flipped him over and noticed the facial features.....it was Austria again??

America's eyes started to water in joy as he saw his lover again even if he was manufactured by temu with materials from shien and equipment from Ali express. America hugged him and makes out with Austria only to realise that his mouth was cold and tasted like steel. It was also as hard as steel. Austria opened his eyes and America was disappointed to discover  that it was a robot because Austria eyes were grey. America looked down to see a penis so he smiled. At least the robot can have sex and fill America up with I dunno oil or smth but America is head over heels for oil so even better.

America picked up the robot but one of the testicles fell off and stubbed his toe. And becasue it was made of metal it hurt so bad. America looked at it in dispointment cuz it will only give him half of the oil and also cuz it started to resemble Hitler.

Fun fact: Hitler had 1 testicle

America just shrugged it off and admired the robot while everyone else stood around fascinated. Germay was examining the testicle.

Tony stepped in and said, "It's ur birthday present from ur daddy. I have 2 Austrias"

America was so glad, "oohh Tony ur such a sweetie pie" and was jumping everywhere.

Suddenly 500 Austria blow up doll balloons flew out of the UFO. They were all smiling, has black hair and that one ungeled string. They were all naked with their mouth open and their inflated dicks sticking out. They flew gracefully into the ceiling.

"Oh no we are being haunted." Prussia screamed.

"You're right! We need to undo this curse but how..?" south korea said in sign language cuz he doesn't have a voice actor.

Tony stepped forward in a main charcter type way. "There is a way..."

Everyone looked at him.

"...we need to get austrias soul into the robot and then he will turn human"

Prussia said, "but how do we get his soul"

"we need to find his body. I have a flying life boat that England can drive. I will be in there too but only 4 of u can fit in there so...who will go..?"

Chapter Text

"Ok guys so who will be going?" Tony said staring at the people.

America screamed at the top of his voice like he got jumpscared by some Hitler x Stalin fanart with a detailed sex scene and an mpreg birth scene. "OH MY GYAT GYYS I REALLY WANNA GO I NEED TO TOUCH GRASS OR  ANYTHING OTHER THAN MY PENIS"

China rolled his eyes and scoffed and didn't like that idea "no u fat bithc you'll take up all the 4 spaces and probably even the ocean."

"shur uo hoe ur just jealous that my booty is bouncy unlike ur pankake"

China was very mad at this and wanted to have a violent uprising against America. He alsmot took out his pp but zipped up his trousers cuz idk if I feel like doing a sex scene rn it's 11 49pm and school is tomorrow. China smacked America's ass so hard that his ass vibrated with sound/ radio waves because of the slap. It was also really loud and the sound waves caused everyone to go deaf for a few seconds and the chandelier almost fell down and the room almost collapsed.

Germany wanted to save his stuff just in case so he ran to his bdsm, sex, bondage, stripper, pizza delivery porn, the porn where some elf gets fucked by some guy's fat penis that is twice the size of them, spanking, dog collars, chains pirnograohy magazines and made sure to hide them from everyone but it was too late since italy had already seen it and he got a boner. China glanced over at the porn, got some inspiration and also got a boner and stared at americas ass. America was getting horn knee beacause of China's gaze and they almost kissed but Tony stopped them.

"WHO TF IS GOING TO GO IN THE THINGY!!" he was very angy.

England spoke loud and proud, "me cuz I have the magic powers to help us on our way."

"ok ur going" Tony said and opened the inflatable lifeboat door to let England go in.

China said, "I can turn mini so I am going cuz I take 0.2 percent of the space if I am mini."

"ok just don't get lost cuz someone might mistake you for a buttplug." tony was really worried about china being mini.

China was allowed onto the boat so now there was space for an extra person.

"obviously me I have to go. I'm the main character." America said. "and...tony..im ur wittle submissive baby boy 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺pweese let me go👉👈😖😖😖😖😖😖"

"sure." he let him in and there was still spaces.

Italy did this pose 👉👈. "pweese can I come too papa?"

"Why do u think you are worthy of assisting us on our voyage, young Italian?"

"b....becauee...I've been a good boy. And I'm very smert."

"perfect. Get in." and the door was opened to let italy in. He sat his booty down.

"Ok guys one last space." tony announced.

All of a sudden there was a bright light and there was cool epic music with explosions in the background as a man approached them. There was also a shooting sound and cars crashing sound. "...i...i.will go." said Germany as the epicness died out cuz someone farted maybe.

"sure and the last space is for me" Tony said.

They got prepared for take off. Tony was doing the engines and controlling the buttons and everyone put their seatbelts on and fastened them. Then before they took off, Tony told them to turn around and listen to an important announcement. "guys before we take off make sure u locate the oxygen masks which are underneath you. When you pull it, tbe airflow starts, don't worry if the bag does not inflate oxygen is flowing. Make sure u know where the lifejackets are. Make sure to pull them down and blow on them like ur life depended on it (haha lol u guys thought I was gonna make a sex joke but I didn't🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂🥶🥶🥶🥶🥵🥵🤠🩷🩷)"

Everyone nodded as they understood the instructions. They waved goodbye to all of their friends."Goodbye everyone. We will make sure to return with Austria"

Russia cried to see them leave, "please return safely with Austria...and please return safe Germany." Russia didn't want to see Germany go and tears went into his eyes. Germany blew a kiss to russia.

Tony made sure that it was inflated enough and England used magic and put pixie dust on the boat to. Make it fly. It would fly but it wouldn't be fast enough so Tony also opened the air hole thing so that they would fly in the air like a baloon whcuh is what happened and they flew faster than fujoshis come up with a yaoi ship from 2 character's who made eye contact for 4 seconds and hate eachother. Kinda like me tbh.

Prussia blew kisses at everyone and so did Canada and the rest waved.

"Goodbye everyone. Safe travels" Japan said.

Then as soon as they left, they all looked at eachother sexually and decided to have a violent sex orgy make out session rasputin party style on Germany's bed. The bed has been abused 10000 times in this entire story. Japan was making out with prussia and grabbed prussia's ass.

Prussia moaned into japan's kiss and started taking his clothes off and soon they were both naked and so was everyone else but I can't remember who else I put in here but they're all fucking now. Wild night while the brave men r flying to find...Austria.

Chapter Text

And so the 4 or 5 people (I already forgot who I put in the story I might have to kill off someone idk), set sail into the sky under Tony's command and they flew. Tony look at his navigator thing that was attached to the inflatable life boat mainly the circular green thing that beeps to scan the area for other boats.

"uhh tiny where are we going exactly?" asked italy, being a dummy.

"We're on a mission to save Austria but...i have a feeling that it's not only Austria we're saving...." he stared intensely infromt of him, thinking he had aura.

America was in shock, "WHAT! Tony what do u mean? I'm pretty sure no one else died falling off of England's ship!"

"No...its...not that..."Italy and America looked at tony in confused.

"You see...was walking one day, I did some research on a random land and I have found traces of that uwu virus that was sucked out of italy. I have researched all the dnas of humanity and found traces of the Austrias spit on the floor, meaning that he was infected. I have managed to find out traces of a huge lab it is called Bondage Dominator-terminator Sex Machine factory...whcih is also known as The BDSM factory. The uwu virus isn't gone"

"okay so what does that mean. We know the origin but I don't give a fuck" said italy, who just wanted some big booty.

"This factory has gone extinct back in 1650 cuz Oliver cromwell wasn't a fan of bdsm and freakyness I mean he probably deep down enjoyed it tbh, he was probably a bottom aswell who knows. But before they could take it down, the factory dissappeared. I've gone to that site recently because of my human analysis and I found specks of expired belle delphine bath water which is one of the ingredients in the uwu virus. Belle delphine...pronounced belee daeleefineay in ancient times, is an ancient histroic citizen who defied all forms of science by mixing ordinary h20 with a rare mineral that no one can ever get which is ptyalize. I have made a conclusion with all of my science that thsi factory still exists as there were new drops of this chemical composition in that area. I need Austrias body to collect more specs of the uwu virus so I can create a magnetic force portal that will open up to the factory"

Italu was so shocked, this was too much info,"OH MY GA DO U KNOW WHERE IT IS."

"no ratard if I did, I would have told you" Tony said "....but, if Austria is Brought back to life, I have enough bath water to locate the factory since the floor droplets we'rent enough. After that we can stop this uwu virus!"

America and itaky nodded and said, "yea" in unison.

It was a long way from Germanys house to the prison they escaped from in idk how many chapters ago and it was hard. There was already some terbulance and a storm was starting which was very bad for them. Germanu looked up at the sky in fear and so did the rest.

And then it started to rain and they weren't even nearby to thw prison. They hoped they could outrun tbe storm but no there was lighting brighter than my future infromt of them. There were a lot of them too lol. Lighting struck onto their inflatable lifeboat and made a hole which severely damaged the aircraft. Tony tried to steer the machine with all his power while Germany and America were trying to fix the controls. All of the alarms were beeping with the warning symbol and even worse it was raining so they couldn't even see.

China found a sewing kit and tired to stitch up the holes and found a massive balloon and wanted to tie it up into the boat to keep it in the air longer and to slow down their landing. England got an idea, "China take the balloon off, I will make a temporary parachute that will make the landing slower."

"okay sure" china ripped off the balooon and gave it to England. England swallowed.

China asked, "why are you do nervous England? Dont you use magic a lot."

"Yes but.."

"Do you not have your wand so u have to use your hands?"

"No I have my wand...Its just that...I have it in my ass and I'm using it as a vibrator right now and the star thing feels nice."

"take it out then or we all die."

"yes but...*sigh* oh well." He pulled the wand out of his ass while moaning sensually which made Chia hard and did magic in oder to maximise the baloon size.

"Help me attach ropes to this baloon or it will fly away." England said and everyone got to work and tied up the ropes to the baloon so they did fall onto the floor like a tomato but gracefully like a feather.

They all landed nice and safely in some random dude's back garden. It was a rich estate but none of them really gave a fuck.

"Oww my booty hurt" America said, rubbing his ass like it was a genie lamp so that he could make wishes to beat gracie bon in the big ass competition.

"Same" italy said, rubbing his ass like he was cleaning a cadillac eldorado from some rich billionaire in the 80s for a surprisingly good amount of money but he needs to wear the most sluttiest sexiest clothes with a lot of water on them. He needs to twerk every hour on the hour for the rich dude so that money will be thrown at him and the lowest amount dropped is no less than 6 figures.

"are we all okay" Germany asked and everyone said yes.

"no I am not okay" said a random hoe.

"huh" they turned around to the noise and it turns out it wad an angry rich man in full 1800s. He looked pissed off asf but he italy definitely wanted to clean his cars.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL DOING ON MY PROPERTY!" He shouted, sounding like some retarded goose that got strangled.

Tony said, " we landed here by accident becasue out boat went down"

"Your bitch asses are trespassing"

"I'm explaining myself slut, we landed here."

"And I own this land so I don't care."

"You are definitly asking for some rough poundings aren't you baby boy?"

"w..what" he blushed.

"come on, be a good baby boy and get on your knees for daddy alpha."

The landlord made this pose 👉👈 but still didn't like trespassers mainly cuz he had gay sex porn in his house and he didn't want anyone to get them beacuse he masterbates them. "nya~ no I won't! And your rizz isn't even that good"

"oohhhh" said America, Italy and Germany.

"you're saying that my pickup lines are trash? You clearly haven't seen what I am capable of eh? We need to have a rap battle"

"ooohhhhh" said china, England.

"well then,
Get ur stupid ass out of this nation
Ur reputation worse than Jaystation
By the time I'm done you're gonna need salvation
Ur crustier than a petrol station

You built like a bitch
And it's worse than a booty itch
Maybe you can suck my dick
If your face didn't look like a roblox glitch
Yeah Im being too nice with you
I'm basically playing around with you
And if you dont get off my land
Your ass is gonna meet my hand, hoe!"

So Tony said:

"You clearly lack functions
And it's even worse that your ass smells
I mean, a hydrogen atom has more electrons that you got braincells

I feel sorry for the land
That they have to be in your hand
I don't even know what to say anymore
U may be rich but your brain's life expectancy is poor
There are no lores
And when you write theres no full stop for the pause

You built like a toad
Gonna run u over if I see u on the road
Maybe you can suck my cock
If your ass stops being a Karen and complaining that I'm invading your block

I'm gonna invade something tonight though" Tony winked at America.

The landlord had enough and called the cops. Tony's gang sighed becauee they were tired of dealing with this. They ran away and tried to jump on the hedges. Italy was first over them but he came face to face with a hot sexy police officer and immediately got a boner. "You mother fuckets are under arrest for tresspassing"

Germany looked at the police car and noticed that it said 'south Korean police'. He wondered how they managed to get this far when they were trying to get to the prison that Austria and the rest escaped from which I can't remember where it is but I think China.

The police officers grabbed them all and put them in the police car and drive to the police station.

They were all shoved in the questionnimg room.

"What are we gonna do guys" Italy asked.

"I domt know" china said.

All of a sudden, someone opened the door but it wasn't a police officer. It was South Korea in a suit that made all of them drool. South Korea used sign language and said, "You will be in court tomorrow and I will defend you. It's us against the money. But I don't think we will win, we need to run away after. I have a plan"

England said, "A court case already and we're not even guilty of anything?"

Tony rolled his eyes, "Its all beacuse I won in that rap battle"

South Korea signed, "It doesn't matter, I'm here to get you guys to escape. The trial starts at 10am and at 10:45 a helicopter will come and take you out of there. You guys just need to keep talking until that time so come up with a long story."

"Thats a pretty good idea but how do we get to the helicopter" asked Germany.

"The helicopter has a bazooka and it will blow up the window. Then we will run up the ladder and that all needs to be done in under 15 seconds. It takes 15 seconds for the police to run across the court room door to the window." South Korea explained.

"How can a musical instrument blow up a window?" Tony said.

"Rocket Launcher"

"wow humanity is so confusing."

"Well anyway I'm leaving now so you guys come up with a random story and whatever it is, make sure it's long. There are 6 of you, Tony, China, England, Germany, America, Italy. Make sure each of you talk for a minimum of 7.5 minutes. 45min÷6 people=7.5 minutes"

And with that South Korea left.

Tony said as he turned to his group. "Okay guys, let's prepare ourselves."