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Chapter Text

"Sakura. Marry me."

"W-what?!"

Sasuke gave her a flat stare and repeated himself. She felt faint. Was she hallucinating? She knew that she had been spending a lot of time at the hospital lately. Shikamaru had dragged her away from work today to make sure she had at least eaten one meal before releasing her back into the world with a kiss, so she was pretty sure this was real. Unfortunately.

"Sasuke-kun, it's really not necessary to propose marriage. I promise I'm just doing my job with your eyes."

It had been several weeks since she and Naruto had been sent on their "diplomatic" mission to retrieve Sasuke from Suna's tender embrace. He had been as incommunicative as always, answering her questions about his health with a series of grunts and single syllables. She had discovered through the trial and error of conversation that the advanced state of his Sharingan was degenerating the chakra pathways of his eyes, causing his eyesight to rapidly deteriorate.

He had stated in their official report that this was the reason he "allowed" himself to be caught, though Sakura privately thought that he was no match for Gaara's sand with his blood limit working against him. Tsunade had refused to provide treatment unless Sasuke agreed to a chakra suppression seal as due punishment for his missing-nin vacation. He would be village bound for one year, starting three days ago.

Tsunade, the wonderful, caring mentor that she was, put Sakura in charge of both Sasuke's eyes and his mental health exams. It's like she wants me to poison her sake.

"I need to revive my clan."

Right, she thought. His other ambition. "Well, I can put you in touch with the head of pediatrics, I'm pretty sure she's maintains a list of women who have expressed interest in being a surrogate."

Sakura was holding his head still with one chakra-laden hand and shining a penlight into his left pupil, so she felt, rather than saw him scowl at her.

"A surrogate won't work. Who will take care of the children?" Children? Does he want a litter?

She moved over to the other eye, performing the same test. "You? The father of said children?"

"Don't be ridiculous. As soon as this year is up, I'm going to be active duty again."

She tilted his chin up. "Activate the first level of your Sharingan." His eyes flashed red and she ran a glowing green hand over his temple to get a feel for the chakra pathways. "Get a nanny?"

"A nanny is not a mother. The Council agrees with my decision."

She was startled. "You talked to the Council about getting a nanny?"

Ah, there was the scowl again. He's going to get frown lines if he keeps up that.

"No, they agree that the Uchiha should start anew, with fresh genes in the bloodline."

"Makes sense. They have always been greedy about Konoha's clans." She tapped a finger against his temple. "Mangekyo." His irises swirled together in the familiar pinwheel and his posture drooped fractionally. Just the activation brought him close to the limit of what the suppression seal allowed him. She ran through her diagnostic quickly. "Okay, off."

His eyes immediately turned to black and he sat stiffly, the metaphorical steel rod in his spine back in place.

She stepped back and turned off her penlight, scribbling down notes on her clipboard. "Okay! Well, good news is that this is a totally curable situation. Bad news is that it's going to take some doing. The eyes are delicate and the process I have in mind will require some healing in between sessions."

He stared at her unblinkingly, so she went on. "We can start tomorrow, after I run the treatment plan by Tsunade-shishou tonight."

"Sakura."

"Yes?"

"You never answered me."

I was hoping he wouldn't notice. "Sasuke-kun … why me?"

He furrowed his eyebrows at her second round of evasion. "You're the only woman I can tolerate."

"Wow, gee, thanks. I really felt the love in that one." She gathered her notes and looked at the clock, entirely ecstatic that he was the last person she had to see today. Sakura had promised Shikamaru that they would have dinner alone together tonight after barely seeing each other since she had gotten back from Suna. She knew without asking that he worried about their fledgling relationship in the face of Sasuke's return. He was going to have kittens about this proposal.

"Is that a no?"

She whirled on him. "Yes that's a no!" He quirked an eyebrow at her phrasing. "Oh shut up, you know what I meant. I'm already in a relationship, in case that had escaped your notice."

"With the Nara? I assumed you were just passing time."

She was flabbergasted. "Passing … are you insane?" Sakura clenched her hands into fists, trying desperately to keep control over her temper. Medics don't hurt their patients, Sakura. Not even if they deserve it a lot.

"You can't possibly want to trade me for him."

Oh well, that does it. Sakura slapped him viciously, putting years of frustration behind the blow, only remembering at the last second not to flow chakra to her fingertips. He fell off the exam table with a thump and stared at her with wide, shocked eyes.

"I don't want to be your broodmare, Sasuke. Nor have I wanted to be anything but your friend for years. You just never realized that people change."

He climbed to his feet, annoyingly graceful. "People don't change, Sakura. Not really."

She sighed and placed a hand on his cheek, healing the blooming bruise. "I'm not going to argue philosophy with you. My answer is 'no' and it will stay 'no'. Why don't you talk to Naruto about this? Maybe he knows a girl who might interest you." Or maybe he can just take you off the market completely.

"No. It will be you or no one. I don't have time to coddle some other woman."

Sakura was edging toward exasperation, thinking longingly of the relaxing dinner she and Shikamaru were supposed to be having. "That attitude right there is why no one likes you."

He looked shocked again and she laughed. "Sorry, Sasuke-kun. You're going to get the same treatment as all my other friends. No more nice Sakura." She shrugged off her white coat and shooed him out of the room. "Now go home to stare at your wall or whatever your new hobby is. I have a date to get to."

Chapter Text

As usual, she was late. If she wasn't careful, she'd start talking about getting lost on the path of life and reading erotic novels somewhere other than the safety of her own bedroom. Sakura craned her neck around the hostess to see Shikamaru waiting for her at their table. At least, he appeared to have attempted to wait for her and then promptly fell asleep while doing so. She smiled as she approached him and reached out to run her fingers through his spiky ponytail.

A hand caught her wrist before she could touch him and she looked down to see his eyes slit open, grumpy look replaced by a sideways smile when he realized it was her. Shikamaru tugged her hand lightly and she leaned forward to greet him with a kiss.

"Mm, hello to you too." Sakura slid into the seat across from him, their hands still intertwined. He still had that same smile on his face. "What?"

"I'm just happy to see you." She squeezed his hand in delight. "That means I can eat now." Sakura laughed and pulled her hand away to throw a napkin at him. His eyes shone with humor as he caught the napkin and placed it on his lap, thanking her graciously.

"You're such a brat. I only keep you around for your good looks." He flushed slightly, embarrassed by her blunt comment. The waitress appearing with their preordered food and tea saved him from having to reply immediately. Sakura just grinned at him annoyingly. What a cute shade of pink. Now we match!

"Stop that." He poured tea for her and slid it carefully across the table.

"What?" She tried to appear innocent, but knew she couldn't fool him.

"I can tell you're being unbearably smug about something in your head."

Sakura gasped dramatically, hand pressed to her heart. "Shikamaru! The absolute nerve! I would never." His expression indicated that he was not impressed. She giggled and picked up her chopsticks, poking through all their options with delight. "Did you just order all of my favorites? How did you know all of my favorites?"

Shikamaru tried to downplay it. "It is an acquired skill when you have Chouji for a lifelong best friend."

"Mhm, yes, Chouji is definitely known for having a picky palate that you would have to cater to. Absolutely." She grabbed one of the umeboshi and popped it into her mouth, chewing happily. "Whatever, I'm in heaven."

"I didn't think the food was that good."

She swallowed heavily. "It is good, but after we had lunch my day took a turn for the worse."

"Oh?" She had his full attention, something she had enjoyed once she realized how rare it was. He was intensely focused on her now and she was unsure of how to tell him about Sasuke's descent into matrimonial madness.

"Shishou put me in charge of Sasuke-kun's health. Mental and physical."

Shikamaru grimaced, not bothering to hide his dismay. She wanted to try to be friends with Sasuke again, but she would never force him to do the same. He was the one who led the failed retrieval mission, after all. Sasuke was the indirect reason many of their peers had come so near death.

"Are you being punished for something?" Sakura had to laugh. He had perfectly echoed her own thoughts when Tsunade had dropped the news on her.

"I think it was mostly because Tsunade didn't want to do it herself." She took a deep breath. "But while I was performing a wellness check on his eyes today, he, uh, proposed to me?"

"… what." Shikamaru dropped his chopsticks into his rice and stared at her unblinkingly. "He did what?"

She was starting to panic a little now and rushed to reassure him. "I guess the Council has suggested that he start rebuilding his clan and I'm pretty much the only woman he knows, so he decided that I was the perfect choice to have little Uchihas with."

"And you said no." His tone was flat, but she could hear the underlying question.

She scowled and poked her chopsticks at her vegetables viciously, wishing they were Sasuke's stupid face. "Of course I said no! Like I would ever consent to just being some convenient walking uterus!" She reached across the table to grab his hand in both of hers. "And just as importantly, I told him that I was with you and I had no intentions of stopping."

His hand was slack in her grip and she looked at him worriedly. I'm going to murder Sasuke if he's ruined this for me before it's even started. I couldn't not tell him, but …

Shikamaru released a big sigh and squeezed her hand gently. "I never took myself for the jealous type." He looked surprised at his own admission. "Are you sure? I know that he was a big part of your life."

"I didn't even know the boy I thought I was in love with, Shikamaru. And now that he's back, I just want to try and build a friendship with him, one that we could have had if I hadn't been so hung up on beating Ino to something."

He snorted. "Yeah, I gave that up a long time ago."

Sakura rapped his knuckles and let go, both of them picking up their chopsticks again. She watched him take a bite of rice and said, "Besides, I'm thinking about trying to set him up with Naruto. What do you think?"

Shikamaru choked and hurriedly took a sip of tea. "Damn it, woman. You timed that."

She just smiled innocently at him, admitting nothing. "I'm serious, though. I think those two would be good together. Well, as good as anyone can be with Sasuke involved."

"Do they even like men?"

Sakura shrugged. "Sasuke certainly doesn't seem to be very interested in women. You should have seen that one girl who was part of the team he formed, Karin. She was crazy hot and he could have been made of stone for all that he cared." She leaned forward and whispered, "I know Naruto has, ahem, experimented with his clones."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. "Dare I ask how you know this?"

Her eyes lit up as she prepared to regale him with the story, but before she could speak she was cut off by their subject of interest shouting from the restaurant entrance.

"SAKURA-CHAN!"

Shikamaru sighed in defeat, already resigned to the fact that his girlfriend's best friend was the king of inappropriate interruptions. Naruto bounded up to their table, ignoring the hostess's happy greeting. He beamed at them and waggled his eyebrows.

"Oh, sorry, am I interrupting?"

"Yes." They spoke in unison and Naruto pouted at them, clearly expecting Sakura to reply in the negative. She rolled her eyes and stood up, pushing Shikamaru further down on his bench as she motioned for Naruto to take her spot. He instantly perked up and Shikamaru couldn't complain about Sakura's warm thigh pressed up against his.

"Sakura-chan, have you seen that asshole lately?"

She grinned at him and nudged Shikamaru pointedly. He grunted and kept eating his rice, ignoring the conversation for now. "Which one? You'll have to be more specific."

Naruto whined, drinking her tea and made a face at the bitter taste. "You know who I mean."

"If you were talking about Sasuke-kun, I had the pleasure of his company today at the hospital."

Naruto's eyes were wide as he froze in the act of stealing a piece of beef off the grill. "The hospital? Is he okay?!"

She laughed behind her hand. "I was just checking his eyes so that I can start treatment. Tsunade-shishou shoved that responsibility off on me."

The tension drained out of his shoulders slightly. "Sounds just like the old lady. How are they? His eyes, I mean."

"Well, I shouldn't discuss a patient's medical business with anyone without permission …"

"Sakura-chan! You know I can just beat it out of him eventually, just save me the trouble."

She snickered into her hand again, thinking of horribly dirty things that friends shouldn't imagine about each other. Shikamaru gave her a long-suffering look that said he knew exactly what she was thinking. Probably Ino's influence.

Sakura cleared her throat, a stray giggle escaping. "He'll be fine, Naruto. Don't you have faith in me?"

"Of course! I just don't want that bastard to die on me right after we finally get him home."

"Well, maybe you should go find him? He was my last patient and I was coming here to meet Shikamaru. I bet he hasn't even eaten yet, knowing him." She hinted heavily, hoping he would pick it up and leave them quickly.

Naruto grinned at her. "Great idea, Sakura-chan! I'll drag his ass down to Ichiraku's with me for some good ol' fashion nutrition. Just like old times."

"Yeah, Naruto, you … drag his ass."

He was confused when she wouldn't look at him, but he got up from the table to leave. He tossed a goodbye over his shoulder and Shikamaru raised a hand lazily to him, before dropping it around Sakura's shaking shoulders. He leaned closer to her and whispered, "You're such a pervert, Sakura-chan. I had no idea."

That was all it took for her to burst out laughing, startling the passing waitress into dropping the bundles of napkins she was carrying. Sakura wiped at the tears forming in the corners of her eyes, gasping helplessly.

Shikamaru leaned against the back of the bench, arm still casually looped over her shoulders. "You're a terrible person, Sakura. I could have lived my whole life without thinking these things about Naruto and Sasuke."

"But you see it, right?" She frowned a bit and tapped her fingers against the table. "To be honest, I can't see Naruto being happy with someone other than Sasuke. He's been a goal for nearly half his life at this point."

"A person is not a prize to win when you reach a certain milestone."

She shook her head. "No, of course not. But their relationship has always been weirdly personal. It only seems to make sense to them. Remember when he got that message Sasuke sent from Kiri? It said 'the fish here smell worse than you do, idiot', but Naruto was over the moon for a week."

Shikamaru did remember that, if only because Sakura had been quietly depressed that Sasuke hadn't bothered to send her any word at all. He'd be damned if he let the asshole send her back into that state of mind again. If that meant encouraging her matchmaking, so be it.

"You win, they're the perfect couple. Now what?"

She grinned at him impishly and placed her hand on his leg. "Now we get out of here. They've crashed our date enough."

They paid for their food and left, strolling through the civilian quarter hand-in-hand. Sakura pulled him to a stop in front of a stall selling colorful gardening implements. He looked at her skeptically.

"Not for me! Kakashi-sensei has this plant called Mr. Ukki and I think he would look just lovely in a new home." She browsed a bit before settling on a bright red rectangular planter. She haggled cheerfully with the vendor, quickly settled on a price they both were satisfied with. Sakura tucked the red monstrosity under one arm and grabbed his hand with the other. "Let's go perform some breaking and entering!"

Before he could reply, she had already dragged him up onto the rooftops. He had barely caught his balance before she was rushing ahead, laughing madly. He gave chase and caught up to her when she hopped down to land in front of an unfamiliar apartment building. Sakura looked up at him, eyes shining. "This is his building. He's still on a mission for another few days."

"You're not seriously saying we should break into your old sensei's house just to replace his planter, are you?" She said nothing, just looked at him hopefully. Shikamaru's shoulders slumped in defeat, helpless to say anything but yes to her. "Of course you are. Why did I choose you again?"

She leaned up on her toes and kissed his nose. "Because I'm adorable." She pressed a longer kiss to his lips. "And I chose you, genius."

"Hmm, you make a compelling argument."

"Good!" She grabbed his hand and they proceeded upstairs to the third floor, where she knocked in a circle around the keyhole. "Kakashi-sensei is paranoid and it's made me paranoid. He changes traps too often to get complacent."

Shikamaru stood away from the door, eyeing it like it was a venomous snake. "Exactly how often do you do this?"

"Hmm?" She looked up from where she was performing a controlled suiton jutsu at the fire that had sprung up from her poking around. "Oh, just enough to let him know I care."

"… your team is so messed up."

"Yeah, and I'm the normal one! Lucky you~" The lock clicked open and she walked in confidently, with Shikamaru hesitant to cross the threshold. He finally did, muttering "I'm honestly beginning to doubt that."

"What's that, Shika-kun?"

"You are a beautiful and talented woman, Sakura, and I am happy to be with you." While true, he couched it in sarcasm so it was easier for him to control the blush that threatened. She turned and smiled at him.

"That's what I thought." She patted his cheek lovingly. "You're such a sweetheart." He lost the battle with the blush, silently damning his pale skin.

"Oi, none of that while we're in the middle of something illegal."

"Spoilsport." She moved further into the single room, wrinkling her nose at the laundry scattered about. Sakura gently placed the planter on the bed and picked up the discarded clothing, placing it all in a nearby basket. She then grabbed Mr. Ukki from the windowsill and deftly replanted it in her recent purchase, stroking the leaves fondly. Shikamaru noticed the only two photos in the room right by the plant, one of which showed a young Team 7. Kakashi and Sakura looked pleased, while Naruto only had angry eyes for Sasuke.

He tore his eyes from the photo to see Sakura smoothing the shuriken patterned blanket, tucking the sides in neatly. "I think he's lived here since his father died. He never told us about him, but I looked up White Fang when Chiyo attacked Kakashi-sensei by accident. He was so little." She looked up at Shikamaru sadly. "My whole team is made up of lost boys."

He felt a little lost himself, unsure of what to do in the face her changed mood. He settled for pulling her into a hug and said, "Well, they have you now, for all the good it will do them."

Sakura's laugh was buried against his chest as she hugged him back tightly. "You always know just what to say."

Shikamaru was given the old planter as she grabbed Kakashi's laundry basket and they left the apartment. She reset the traps expertly and he wondered what other talents she had been hiding while he was too busy noticing her pretty smile and the graceful curve of her neck.

He couldn't wait to find out.

Chapter Text

"Sakura. Marry me."

Is this déjà vu? Is that what I'm feeling right now? She checked the date on the calendar discretely. Nope, it's definitely not yesterday, which means he's asking me again.

"Sasuke-kun, I already told you no. No doesn't mean 'try again later'."

"I always get what I want."

"This is sounding more and more creepy, you know."

Sasuke was starting to look frustrated. "Genetically we are a much better match than you and the Nara."

"Whoa, down boy. I'm not looking to match my genes with anybody's for a long time. Also, stop insulting Shikamaru. It makes you look desperate." Sasuke was definitely annoyed now and she felt that this was a good point to prod him into laying down on the exam table so that she could start the procedure. Tsunade had looked at her painstaking notes yesterday, telling her with pride that she couldn't have done a better job herself. Sakura felt a small measure of satisfaction at her words, despite her on-going battle of irritation at the woman for pawning Sasuke off onto her in the first place.

She cut him off before he could reply or, god forbid, ask her to marry him again. "No talking while I'm working on your eyeballs."

Sakura brought herself into a shallow meditative state before she attempted to touch Sasuke's chakra with her own. Breath in. One, two, three. Breathe out. One, two, three …

He didn't flinch as she placed glowing hands on his eyelids, reaching tentatively for the broken and narrowed pathways. For the very first time in her life, Sakura was thankful that he was such a stoic individual. This was a very tedious procedure for any patient.

She concentrated on repairing every single micrometer that was torn, strengthening the pathways against future damage. It was this fusion of healing and fortification that made the process so complex and she had to stop after three hours, exhausted but happy with the headway she had made. Sasuke had barely twitched the entire time.

If only all my patients could be like him.

"What would make you agree to marry me?"

Right, forgot that.

"Sasuke-kun, I'm not interested in dating you, let alone marrying you." She saw his brow crease in slight confusion at her words. "You would be better off trying to find a woman who is interested in those things."

"I don't like other women."

"Sasuke-kun." She put her hands on her hips, feeling weary. "Do you even like me? We've barely spoken since you got home and it's not like you were a great penpal when you went off on your little adventure."

He shifted minutely on the table, which may as well have been a glaring beacon of discomfort from him. "You're my friend?"

Sakura was not impressed. "That sounds more like a question than an answer. I want to be your friend, Sasuke-kun. But you make it very difficult when you keep asking me to marry you." She wrote down the status of their progress on the first day of treatment, neatly charting the improvements she had made. She was about to dismiss him for the day when there was a knock on the door. Shizune popped her head in and waved for her to leave the room.

Sakura excused herself to Sasuke, who just grunted. She rolled her eyes and closed the door behind her, leaning against it and looked at Shizune curiously.

"Tsunade-sama wants you to give him a full physical."

"What, right now? Didn't she already do that when he got home? Not to mention the healing I did when he was in Suna?"

"A full panel, including sexual history and STD testing."

Sakura could feel her jaw drop. She hissed, "I can't believe she sent you here to tell me this. She did it on purpose, I just know it."

Shizune shook her head in amusement. "While that may actually be true, Sasuke has made his intentions to restart his clan known to the Council. They were the ones who requested this through Tsunade-sama."

Sakura clenched her hands around the clipboard and it creaked ominously. "I'll do the damn tests, but I'm not releasing anyone's medical history to them, no matter who they are. Meddling old bastards."

The older woman just patted her shoulder. "Good luck, Sakura-chan."

"Yeah," she muttered. "I'm gonna need it."

Sakura swept back into the room, tossing her clipboard onto the counter and wondered how to proceed. It's not as if she had never examined someone she knew before. Just last year Tsunade had forced her to run the entire ANBU squad through a battery of STD tests once she realized how they tended to relieve stress on and off missions. Sakura had been quietly amused to see that Genma had an elaborate butterfly tattoo on his inner thigh. She had raised an eyebrow when she saw it and the man had just smirked at her, not at all embarrassed.

Neji's insistence on going commando was a surprise too …

She stared at Sasuke, lost in thought, until even he got uncomfortable. "Sakura. What."

Snapping out of it, she opened a drawer to find a blank questionnaire sheet and attached it to clipboard. She brandished it like a shield and said, "Sasuke, the Council has requested that you receive specific testing now that you're interested in reproducing." Sakura tried to be as clinical as possible to relieve some of the awkwardness that was pretty much guaranteed. "Please understand that I will be asking these questions as your medic and not your friend."

His face was blank. "Okay."

She first asked and jotted down all the information that she already knew from previous exams, including allergies (none), medications (none), chronic diseases (Naruto doesn't count) and hesitated when she got to the short section titled "sexual history". I'm a professional, I can do this.

"Age at first sexual intercourse?" Just read it right off the sheet. If you can ask Neji these questions, you can ask Sasuke.

"Fifteen." At his bland answer, Sakura nearly dropped her pen. She had expected him to reply negatively, absolutely sure of his inability to interact with women in a meaningful way. Then again, he was a very pretty boy …

"Was it consensual?"

Sasuke just looked at her, annoyed that she would even question his ability to protect himself. "I'm not easy to subdue. Yes, it was consensual."

"Ah. I see." She did not see. This was turning all of her theories about Sasuke on their head. For all that she had told him that this was a professional exam, she wanted to know exactly what happened, because Sakura was baffled. Still, she reigned in her curiosity and cleared her throat, moving on to the next invasive query.

"Number of sexual partners?"

"One." At least that made more sense. Sasuke off traveling the country-side, visiting bars and picking up women casually did not fit what she knew about him. She could just imagine it now: Hey baby, wanna see a magic trick? And then he activates the curse seal and grows those creepy hand wings.

"Are you currently sexually active?"

He scowled at her and said, "No, obviously not."

Sakura blithely ignored his attitude. "There's nothing obvious about sexual history, Sasuke-kun. That's why we have this sheet."

"You can ask."

"Hmm?"

"You can ask who it was." She stared at him in surprise. Was he offering information without wheedling? What sort of bizarro world had she traveled to this morning? First the repeated proposal and now Sasuke was trying to be cooperative? It was unreal.

"That would be very inappropriate of me, Sasuke-kun."

"But you want to know." His dark eyes gleamed and Sakura knew she had been caught; obviously she had not hidden her curiosity well enough from her observant former teammate.

"Of course I do, I'm nosy like that. I won't ask, though."

"Fine. I'll tell you. It was Karin. Once was enough."

She couldn't help it, he had offered. "Enough for what?"

"To get her to leave me alone."

She squinted at him. "Are you saying you slept with her only so she would stop chasing after you? That seems like it would have the opposite effect."

Sasuke shrugged one shoulder elegantly. "It worked."

She grinned at him unkindly and very unprofessionally. "Maybe you were so bad in bed that even your pretty face couldn't save it. Karin seemed to be a woman who knew what she wanted. Clearly a good sex life is one of those things."

He scowled at her again, offended at the implication that he was bad at anything, but didn't reply. The grin stayed on her face as she scribbled down his official answers and then said, "I have to do a blood test and a physical exam. Please remove your pants."

Sakura placed her clipboard down on the counter and snapped on some gloves, only to turn and see that Sasuke had stripped entirely naked. He raised an eyebrow at her bewildered look, saying only, "This seemed more expedient."

"For what?"

"For whatever you need to do to me." Sakura wasn't sure, but she thought he had tried to inject something that almost sounded like humor into his tone. Considering what she knew of Sasuke, the idea was difficult to comprehend. She conducted the examination with lightning speed, trying to clear her mind back to medic mode while she essentially fondled Sasuke's genitals.

This is the weirdest day of my life and it's not even lunch time yet.

Sakura was half-heartedly poking through the unappetizing cafeteria food in her office when Shikamaru entered without knocking. He hesitantly held a cloth-wrapped bento out to her and said, "My mother sent me here."

Taking the bento eagerly, she giggled at his tone. "Yoshino-san is so thoughtful." He grumbled and threw himself into the big comfy chair in front of her desk, muttering to himself. "Bad day at the office, dear?"

Shikamaru had his eyes closed and he draped a forearm over his face. "I might just defect if I have to proctor another Chunin Exam." He realized too late what he said and scrambled up, looking at her with slight unease. "I didn't mean-"

"Relax. I'm not going to burst into tears because you say certain words, Shikamaru. Give me some credit."

He sighed. "I'm sorry, this whole thing is just very troublesome." Sakura smiled at him and he could feel his pulse pick up just a tiny bit. She was such a pretty sight to see in the middle of a terrible day, which is why he had not needed any convincing when his mother had pressed the food onto him before he left the house this morning.

"Surely you must be used to it by now? This is what, your sixth time?"

Shikamaru groaned and rubbed a hand over his face. "Don't remind me. I'm just sick of the politics. The Exam starts in three days and the village representatives are still squabbling over what color chairs their respective kages are going to have for the viewing."

She paused in the middle of her hunt through the vegetables for more snow peas. "You're joking." Sakura looked at his face and raised her eyebrows when he said nothing. "Wow, and I thought my day was ridiculous."

He leaned forward and snatched one of the onigiri out of the second tier, deftly avoiding her flailing chopsticks. He took a bite, hoping it was something other than Sakura's favorite umeboshi. "Oh? Do tell."

"Well, I found out that Sasuke-kun isn't a virgin."

The rice in his mouth suddenly tasted like dust and he found it difficult to swallow. Sakura kept nibbling at her vegetables. "Why do you always say these things when I'm eating?"

"Mostly for the entertainment value. It's so hard to fluster the great Nara Shikamaru, after all."

"Not for you." He busied himself with finishing the onigiri after saying it, proving his statement true by being flustered at telling her she did fluster him. He was a mess.

Sakura took pity on him and didn't comment, just picking up on the previous thread of their conversation. "The Council, in their wisdom, requested that Sasuke-kun be given a full physical that included sexual history since he wants to have babies so quickly." She set down her chopsticks. "He was strangely blasé about it."

"Are you sure you should be telling me this?" He tapped his chin. "I'm pretty sure there are rules against it."

She dismissed the idea. "Sasuke-kun has given me full permission to discuss his medical history with anyone I deem appropriate. He left it up to my discretion as to who that may be."

"I'm sure he didn't mean for you to gossip about him."

"Pft, you're the only one I had planned on telling. He's a frustrating patient and you know you're my favorite person to talk shop with." Sakura batted her eyelashes at him prettily. Shikamaru sighed again, giving into the inevitable. So much of her life up until now had revolved around the broken pieces of her team. It would be unfair to insist that she not speak of them, even if he did feel a flickering of unreasonable jealousy.

Her voice was quiet when she spoke, "Just in the interest of full disclosure, he proposed again today."

Ah, there was that jealous fire, coiling in the pit of his stomach. Shikamaru was pretty sure between the Uchiha and the Chunin Exams, he was going to develop an ulcer.

"It probably burns him up that you said no to him again." There, he said it confidently, with absolutely no hint of the uncertainty he felt deep, deep in his heart.

Sakura just nodded, taking it for granted that he would just know she would refuse after yesterday's conversation. "He certainly doesn't like to take no for an answer. But he's always been like that."

"I'm growing more and more convinced that having Naruto take him off your hands is the best idea."

"I knew you'd see it my way." She stood from her desk and walked around the edge, dropping herself onto his lap heavily. He huffed at the impact, but didn't complain when she tucked her head under his chin. "I was amazed that Sasuke-kun even answered my questions. He was always such an intensely private person before he left."

"Hmm?" Shikamaru was distracted by rubbing his cheek on her hair, feeling it catch the stubble he had been too lazy to shave that morning.

"Apparently he did have sex with that Karin girl, but it was so that she would go away."

He paused in nuzzling to parse her last sentence. "… seriously, your team is so fucked in the head." Shikamaru grunted as she thumped him hard on the chest, flak vest barely taking away the sting of impact. "And we haven't even mentioned Sai yet."

"Don't start in on him. He hasn't even called me Ugly in months!"

"He shouldn't call you Ugly at all. Seriously, was he raised in the wild?"

Sakura shrugged. "Might at well have been. I try not to lose my temper with him, but sometimes it's a struggle. He just doesn't really grasp even the basics of social interaction. Honestly, he's like the opposite of Sasuke-kun, who knows but doesn't care."

"You're Konoha's preeminent collector of emotionally damaged men."

She wound her arms around him and kissed his neck, sending shivers down his spine. "What does that make you?"

"An anomaly?" Shikamaru turned his head toward her and they spent the next several moments lost in each other, kissing softly. His pulse was beating fast and he felt as if he were about to suffocate from just the feeling of being with her, to have permission to touch and kiss and taste. He had never considered himself a passionate man, but Sakura stirred something in him that was more than just the usual hormonal fog of lust.

She broke away from his lips with a reluctant sigh and laid her head on his shoulder. "As much as I enjoy being scandalous in my office, I have rounds to do." She shifted out of his lap with a final lingering kiss, nipping gently at his lower lip. He closed his eyes in enjoyment; when he opened them, she had stepped back into her professional medic mode, clothing unwrinkled and demeanor serious. Her eyes were happy, though, and he would take that as a win.

"Of course, Sakura-sama. I'll leave you to your subjects." She swatted him and wrapped up the empty bento box for him to take.

"Tell your mother thank you for me. Will I see you tonight?"

He winced and rubbed the back of his head. "Probably not. I have to meet Temari and the rest of the representatives for an entirely specious 'harmonious get together' to celebrate our hard work. It will probably end in tears and bloodshed."

Her eyes shone. "Too bad. I'd like to see that."

"Actually, now that I think of it … no one said I couldn't bring a date."

Sakura gave him a grin that was razor sharp. "Afraid some of those tears will be yours if I leave you alone?"

"More like I would just appreciate an extra body to shield me from Temari's upcoming rampage."

She fluttered at hand in his direction faintly. "You say the nicest things, Shika-kun. I'll be your guardian tonight, dear maiden." Sakura kissed his cheek briefly and then pushed him out of her office.

Chapter Text

"Sakura! So you're the one this lazy bastard has been mooning over." Temari had zeroed in on them as soon as they entered the lavishly decorated room in the Hokage residence. She was dressed in a lower-cut variation of her usual black kimono, but her enormous weapon was nowhere in sight. Sakura smiled at her warmly and Shikamaru's arm tightened around her waist, as if preparing to flee.

"Hi Temari. This is the party, huh?" She looked around, seeing that the majority of the people gathered were much older than the two standing with her. "Looks like a real blast."

The blonde barked a laugh and said, "It would be if they had let me bring my fan."

"We'll just have to find some other way to have fun." Sakura and Temari grinned at one another mischievously, clearly ready to do something terrible that was sure to end in trouble.

Shikamaru just looked up at the ceiling in supplication and asked the room rhetorically "Why did I think it was a good idea to bring her here?"

Temari slapped him hard the shoulder. "Hey, don't be like that. Sakura is too good for you, anyway."

The three of them moved further into the room, mingling with the stuffy older representatives, some of whom had never even been shinobi. Between nauseatingly insincere conversations, Temari and Sakura chatted about her brothers, whom Sakura had visited with when she was assigned to escort Sasuke home.

"Gaara was very excited to see Naruto. I could tell by the fact that his lips twitched when he came to greet us."

"Wow, I don't know anyone outside our family who is so good at reading Gaara. Are you sure you wanna stick with this guy? My brother is the Kazekage, you know."

Sakura laughed and pretended to think about it, "Hmm, what are the benefits?"

"For one, I'd be your sister-in-law. Also, you'll be rid of that lump on your side, there."

"Hey!" Shikamaru knew Sakura wasn't serious, but felt the need to make himself known regardless. "I'm still here. Listening."

"We know!" They both laughed at him and continued to speak around him, not at all troubled by his possibly hurt feelings.

Sakura made a teasing face and stuck out her tongue. "But then I would also have Kankuro as a brother-in-law. I'm sorry, Temari, but that's a deal-breaker."

The other woman sighed dramatically. "I understand. At this rate, neither Gaara nor I will ever be able to marry unless we ship him off somewhere secluded." Her eyes brightened. "Maybe you can introduce him to someone from here!"

Shikamaru thought this line of conversation brought them into dangerous territory. "No. Don't encourage Sakura's matchmaking." His girlfriend pouted at him and he shook his head. "Nope. You've already got one project."

Before Temari could ask (and Shikamaru could just see the questions bubbling at the tip of her tongue), they were interrupted by two delegates from Iwa. One of them had fixed his eyes on Temari's cleavage while the other stared directly at the seal on Sakura's forehead.

"And who might this lovely young lady be, Shikamaru-kun?" He kept his face blank, but inwardly he was cringing. The Iwa delegates had been the ones who were arguing so passionately about chair colors this morning. He hated them with all the energy he could muster, but they were related to the Tsuchikage and thus, to politically relevant to insult. They exploited the connection in the worst of ways.

Sakura smiled at the man charmingly. "I'm Sakura. It's a pleasure to meet you …?"

"Hachiro." His eyes stayed on her seal, but he gestured to the other man next to him, "and my cousin, Saburo. We haven't seen your beautiful face at any of our meetings."

"I'm just here to keep Shikamaru company, Hachiro-san." On the far side of their group, Temari attempted to engage in Saburo in meaningless conversation while he responded with single syllables aimed at her chest. Shikamaru could actually hear her teeth grinding.

Hachiro's eyes lit up with a disturbing glee. "So you're free to leave him for more … esteemed guests?"

Did he just imply …

Sakura's pleasant smile gained a sharp edge. "I'm afraid that it isn't possible, Hachiro-san. Shikamaru is stuck with me all night."

She's playing into it. What the hell is Sakura thinking?

The man's lecherous gaze drifted down her body leisurely. "Please let me know if you change your mind, Sakura-chan. I can make it worth your while." He tapped his cousin on the shoulder and they left without another word, meandering over to where the Kiri delegate was hiding by an ice sculpture.

"Sakura, that man thought you were a sex worker."

"Mmhm, he did." She looped her arm through his casually. "Did you see the way he stared at the Yin Seal? It's a good thing I've gotten over my forehead." Shikamaru was surprised that she wasn't more offended about the whole other bit.

"He did the same thing when Tsunade-sama met with us at the beginning of the Exam prep."

Temari had managed to cool her temper enough to rejoin their conversation. "Some brothels mark their women with the house seals, especially if they are considered of particular worth."

"I won't even ask how you know that, Temari." The blonde just shrugged.

Sakura sighed. "Well, at least he didn't say as much to shishou."

"How do you know?"

"He's still alive, for one."

They resumed mingling with the rest of the gathering, leaving a large berth between themselves and the Iwa representatives. Temari and Sakura picked at the buffet table, choosing to stick to the fruit selections while Shikamaru considered drowning himself in sake just to get through the rest of the dreary night.

Sakura was content to introduce herself at Shikamaru's date, never mentioning her connection with Konoha's Hokage. He picked up on this when she had greeted the third delegate in a row with just her first name and a smile. After he went in search of champagne, Shikamaru drew Sakura aside, leaving Temari in the clutches of a dour woman from Taki.

"What's going on?"

"What do you mean?" She toyed with the ends of her short hair, not meeting his eyes.

"The name thing. What's your plan? I know you're doing it on purpose."

She huffed. "Caught on, did you?" He gave her a look that made her recoil in horror. "Don't ever do that again."

"This is just my face, Sakura."

"No, that was the same "excuse me, I'm a genius" look that Neji and Sasuke get and it is very unsettling to see on you."

Shikamaru snorted, amused despite himself. "Don't change the subject, woman."

"Fine, fine. As shishou's official apprentice, I have to make an appearance with her at the third stage of the Chunin Exams. I'm observing them in their natural habitat."

Shikamaru could feel the pieces of conversation over the evening come together. "That's why you didn't do anything to Hachiro for what he said earlier."

"I'm politically aware enough to realize that that straight up murder of the Tsuchikage's third cousin during a cocktail party is frowned upon."

"You knew who he was?"

"I have been Tsuande-shishou's apprentice for years. I have forgotten more about the political machinations of the Elemental Countries than that asshole would ever even know." She smiled at him with shining eyes. "I'll wring the neck of that puffed up little peacock."

"That might be the sexiest thing you've ever said."

Temari rejoined them. "Whoa, there. Should I come back later?"

Sakura's face was flushed, but she shook her head. "No, we're just discussing murder and mayhem."

"Sounds like my kind of date."

Shikamaru watched a familiar troublesome expression flit across Sakura's face. "You know, there's a guy in Konoha who you should meet. I think you would really get along."

"Oh?" Temari was curious now, damn her. "Is he cute?"

"Mhmm, you can trust me. I've seen him naked." Temari cackled happily, demanding more details. "He's part of Tsunade-shishou's guard." Shikamaru could see where this was heading and dreaded the end result.

"No, Sakura. Do not introduce this woman to Genma. Konoha won't survive." The blonde's eyes lit, far more interested now due to Shikamaru's disapproval. The two women discussed the logistics of introductions and where they would meet up the next day to accomplish their nefarious plans.

He tugged at Sakura's arm. "We've put in enough time here. Let's get out before I start screaming."

She grinned at him and waved to Temari, who was looking for her own exit strategy. "While that would be a sight , I'll take pity on you for now." Our of the corner of her eye, Sakura saw Hachiro watching them leave. She fairly plastered herself to Shikamaru's side as they walked, putting her arm around his waist and slipping her fingertips under his shirt, stroking his lower back. Shikamaru didn't stop moving, but it was a near thing.

"What are you playing at?"

"Hachiro is looking. I just want him to drown in his assumptions."

"That includes the assumption that I need buy a date?"

Sakura's hand froze on his back. "Shit, I didn't think of that. I'm sorry, Shikamaru." He sighed heavily as they crossed the threshold.

"It's fine. He'll find out the truth in less than a week anyway."

"Still, I should have thought of how it would affect you." She frowned. "I'm not used to being accountable to another person like this."

"You can make it up to me somehow."

They left the building and in unspoken agreement, headed towards her apartment. As soon as they jumped from the rooftops to land at her front door, Shikamaru pressed her against it and kissed her vigorously, tasting the melon she had earlier. Sakura responded happily, her hands traveling up his chest to wrap around the back of his neck. She arched into him as he slowly ran his hands down her sides, skimming her breasts and coming to rest possessively on her waist, thumbs stroking the soft skin under her shirt. He made a quiet noise against her mouth as she shifted even closer, rubbing her thigh between his legs teasingly. Shikamaru pulled away, both of them breathing hard.

He smirked at her and his eyes were teasing. "How much is this going to cost me?"

Sakura just tipped her head back against the peeling paint of her front door and laughed.

They disabled the front door traps through hurried kisses, not bothering to turn on the lights as they started tugging at one another's clothes. Sakura walked backwards toward her bedroom as Shikamaru kissed her lips, her neck, anywhere he could reach and she reciprocated in her touch, pulling at his belt viciously. He had a brief flare of panic about being unprepared before Sakura sunk to her knees and he forgot how to think at all.

Hours later, Shikamaru was woken by a horrific crashing noise and loud cursing. At the first sound, Sakura had fallen out of bed and was now adding to the cursing, clearly aware of who was in her apartment. He yawned and pulled his hand through his unbound hair, annoyed when it got tangled half-way. "What's going on?" He tied his hair up messily and rooted around for his pants, eyeing Sakura's half-naked form appreciatively.

She gave his bare chest the same admiring look and then scowled. "Naruto."

Shikamaru dropped his shirt and slumped. "It's like he has radar." She scooped the shirt up off the floor and put it on, where it fell to her mid-thighs. She shrugged and didn't bother with pants, scrubbing a hand through her own hair. He kissed her forehead and left the bedroom, her footsteps echoing quietly behind his.

"Hey, Sakura-chan, sorry for the mess-" Naruto looked up from the floor where he was sprawled to see Shikamaru staring at him with disbelief. "Ah! You're not Sakura-chan!"

"Oh good, he isn't entirely senseless." Sakura stepped out from behind him and contemplated the broken dishes spread all over her kitchen. "But he might be after I'm done with him."

Naruto curled up, trying to present a smaller target. "I can explain?"

She just quirked an eyebrow at him. "Can you?"

"I-no, not really. I have no idea how this happened, I just really needed to talk to you!"

Sakura squinted at the clock on the wall of her kitchen. "At one in the morning? Some of us have real jobs, you know." Naruto ignored the implied insult and looked at her pleadingly. "Fine, what do you want?"

He looked at Shikamaru, who just crossed his arms over his bare chest and stayed where he was. Naruto huffed, but spoke anyway. "Sasuke is getting married!"

They both started, but not for the reason he was suspecting. Sakura stared at him intensely. "He found someone else?"

"Someone else? What? He just told me that he was ready to revive his clan and he said that he was close to sealin' the deal with his future bride. But in Sasuke-speak." To his confusion, Sakura closed her eyes in resignation and Shikamaru looked highly annoyed.

"Naruto, Sasuke-kun isn't marrying anyone."

"How do you know? Did he tell you first?" Naruto looked hurt.

Shikamaru snorted. "You could say that." Sakura poked him in the ribs, hard. He rubbed at the spot, not looking any less irritated at the world in general.

"Sasuke-kun proposed to me and I turned him down. Twice, so far."

"W-what? Why you?"

Sakura smiled wryly and said, "That's pretty much exactly what I said. My refusal hasn't even gotten through his thick head yet." She sighed and started picking up the large shards of porcelain littering the floor, with Shikamaru moving to help.

Naruto was still in shock as she poked around him. "I can't believe it. He is the last person I expected to get married at all, let alone be the one who went first."

"Unless you hook him up with someone, I still think he's going to be the last." Sakura shared a look with Shikamaru who just shrugged and yawned, leaving the kitchen to return to her bedroom. "Naruto, I don't think Sasuke-kun is even interested in women."

He just frowned thoughtfully and said, "… You're probably right." He saw her shocked look. "What? Did you think I wouldn't notice? I mean, you saw that Karin girl hanging on him, right? Most guys would be all over that. She had great legs."

Sakura pressed her lips together, determined not to say anything else about that subject. If Naruto and Sasuke were going to get together, they had to think it was their own idea or it would implode in her face.

"I think that's why he's so insistent that it be me." She stood, finished picking up the largest shards and offered him a hand up. "I think the Council put the idea in his head, honestly. I know he's always said it was a dream, but we're still pretty young. I mean, can you see Sasuke-kun with a baby?"

She handed Naruto the broom and he swept while she watched. Quietly, he said, "I could. Maybe not now, but he deserves to have a family if that's what he wants."

"Then he needs to find someone who wants to start a family with him, not just some person he knows who might have the right parts for it." Sakura watched carefully as she spoke, trying to keep her pronouns vague. "I've told him this, but I don't think it's sunk in. Maybe you could bring it up? He's always listened to you more than anyone else."

Naruto huffed as he dumped the porcelain fragments in the trash. "Which is barely at all, Sakura-chan."

"Better than nothing. Please? I really think it would do a world of good if you talk to him."

"Anything for you, Sakura-chan." He smiled at her like he always had, but there was a slight tinge of sadness in his eyes. "You know you're my best friend, right?"

She touched his arm lightly. "And you're mine. Nothing's going to change that. Not even if Sasuke decides to go crazy again and try to marry Tsunade."

The blonde laughed loudly at the idea. "God, I would love to see that proposal." She giggled and he looked at her wall clock, wincing. "I'm sorry for busting in here so late, Sakura-chan, really. I guess it could have waited."

She shrugged. "It's okay, I understand. One day's worth of missed sleep won't kill me."

Naruto wiggled his eyebrows at her. "Just sleep, huh? Is that why you're not wearing any pants?"

"Well, if you must know, there's a great part of Icha Icha Tactics where the heroine takes out a huge-"

"SAKURA-CHAN!"

Chapter Text

The third stage of the Chunin Exams snuck up on her, though she was sure Shikamaru was fairly counting down the days. Sakura took her place next to Tsunade, smiling at Shizune on the Hokage's other side. Her eyes brightened as she saw Hachiro across the dais next to Onoki and she waggled her fingers at him as she caught his gaze. When he recognized her, his face lost all color and he wavered slightly in his seat, looking ill.

Tsunade noticed this exchange and raised an eyebrow at Sakura. She smiled innocently at her mentor. "Yes, Tsunade-sama?"

The eyebrow stayed in place. "Now I know something's up, Sakura. You look far too pleased with yourself."

She laughed behind her hands, unable to contain herself. "I was just giving our esteemed guests a lesson in how to look underneath the underneath. All in the interest of international cooperation, of course."

Tsunade was skeptical. "Of course." Further conversation was derailed as the ANBU guard behind them motioned to her that they were ready to start. Tsunade rose from her seat smoothly and gave a short, precise speech about the qualities necessary to be a successful shinobi and then gestured to Shikamaru to announced the first match. She sat and watched the proceedings with detached interest, though she sent Shizune down to aid in the healing of an unfortunate genin from Taki after he lost brutally to a sharp-toothed Mist girl.

Sakura eyed the boy with a smug air. "If you think about it, it was really his own fault. I'm sure all those cat-calls about her flat chest weren't necessary."

Tsunade snorted. "That girl would have broken him no matter what. She looks like one of Mei's protégés." The Mizukage had declined to attend the exams, though she allowed three of her teams to apply. To absolutely no one's surprise, they had all passed through the first two stages and were now equal to the number of Sand and Konoha genin who were lined up to fight.

Shizune returned after a quick check on the boy. "There sure are a lot more genin than usual. Older, too."

Tsunade nodded. "I wanted to keep our genin with their instructors longer, so I requested that they keep their teams for at least eighteen months before nominating them. For many of them this is their first test. For once, we're not in the middle of a massive crisis and we don't need to push children through the ranks."

Shizune made a pleased noise and Sakura could only agree. "That is an excellent idea, shishou."

"I occasionally have them," Tsunade said, wryly. "I imagine that's why they let me keep this job."

Sakura laughed and turned her focus onto the matches. She was thankful that they were mostly uneventful; she didn't think Shikamaru would appreciate a rereun of their own first exams. Speaking of … I wonder where Naruto and Sasuke-kun are right now?

She had seen Sasuke several times over the past few weeks, working on healing his eyes and trying to subtly probe him psychologically, since she knew he would just shut down for a traditional mental health examination. Sakura didn't want to think that he had been irreparably harmed by his past trauma, but he was so close-mouthed that it was impossible to tell. To her relief, he hadn't brought up the idea of marriage again and she could only pray that it was because Naruto had talked some sense into him and not because he was preparing a sneak attack on her.

I should ask Naruto what Sasuke-kun said when he mentioned it.

Sakura and her new patient had formed a tentative sort of bond while she talked at him about all the things he had missed during his time away and he grunted in acknowledgement every so often. She was professional when necessary and teasing when she could get away with it. Sakura was sure Sasuke-kun had never really known her any more than she knew him and the fact that she had a personality outside "infatuated fan girl" or "angry at Naruto" was an everlasting, yet hastily hidden, surprise to him.

She was brought slightly out of her reverie when a shuriken came flashing toward her face, its initial trajectory in the ring thrown off when the Suna genin it was aimed at displayed a surprising aptitude for wind chakra. She plucked it out of the air and spun it around her fingers distractedly, still half-thinking about her friends.

Tsunade and Shizune just shook their heads and the Hokage nudged her. "Sakura, no daydreaming about lover boy when you're in public. Keep that to your bedroom."

"Huh? Shishou! I wasn't!" Sakura was turning as pink as her hair now. Tsunade was one of the few people who could still embarrass her noticeably, something the woman took great pride in doing constantly. Sakura groaned and dropped her head into her hands. "You're the worst. I was just wondering what Sasuke-kun was up to."

Her mentor pursed her lips. "I told Naruto to keep the Uchiha busy during the exams. I don't want him screwing things up for us. He's still considered a criminal."

Sakura heaved a sigh. "I know, but I still can't help but worry about him. Them. I probably always will."

"Ah? And how does Shikamaru feel about that?"

She scowled at Tsunade's smirking face. "Shikamaru understands that our team is all sorts of messed up and accepts me anyway."

"Hmm. You caught yourself a good one. Much more rational than most boys your age." Tsunade looked over at the Gaara, who was placidly sitting in his full Kazekage robes next to Temari. "And not prone to extremes."

Sakura followed her glance and smiled. "You know, I think it would do wonders for our alliance if Gaara, or maybe his siblings, found someone here." She had pointedly raised her voice slightly so that the ANBU stationed behind them could hear it. "I told Temari I would introduce her to someone, but he was sent on a mission before I could grab him." She knew that Genma had just returned yesterday, sunburnt and scratched, but otherwise unscathed.

"Oh? I'd like my shinobi back in one piece and I'm not sure you can promise that with Temari involved." Despite her words, Tsunade was actually very fond of the kunoichi, who was a relatively familiar face in Konoha due to her position as Suna's diplomatic representative.

"She did promise not to break him. Much." Sakura shared a grin with the two women. Shizune burst into quiet laughter, trying desperately to hide behind her hands. Sakura tipped back to look at the ANBU member in the bear mask, giving him a thumbs up. She knew Genma was listening and hoped he would take the initiative.

The matches seemed to drag on the most of the day and the winning genin were starting to flag as they had to get up and fight after shorter and shorter rest periods. Finally, the winner of the third stage had ultimately come down to the sharp-toothed girl from Mist, Nomura Tomi. Sakura made sure to remember the name, because she felt sure this kunoichi was going places.

Tsunade had slowly drifted over to Onoki with Shizune once the matches were completed, but Gaara was still in his seat while Temari was speaking to him in low tones. Sakura had really wanted to go throw her presence in Hachiro's face again, but she knew that the Sand nin were leaving soon and she wanted to say goodbye.

"Temari! Kazekage-sama! Good ending to our most recent Exams, yes?"

The blonde nodded. "No one died, so I'll count it as a win."

"Are you excited to be going back home? I know you've been here for nearly two months setting this up."

Temari shrugged, but it was Gaara who answered. "She is missed in Suna."

Sakura grinned. "Such sibling devotion! Kazekage-sama, you'll make Temari blush with all your words of affection." He stared at her, blank-faced as ever.

Temari had clapped a hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles. When she regained control over herself, she waved a hand between them and said, "Are you sure you don't want to come with me? That offer is still open. We can trade you for Kankuro." Gaara's brow furrowed at her words, confused.

Sakura put her hands on her hips. "I don't think Konoha would consider that a fair trade."

"Fine, we'll give them his puppets too."

"You drive a hard bargain, Temari. But I don't think Shikamaru would appreciate you trying to steal me away for Gaara." At this Gaara's eyes widened a fraction, taken aback as much as he ever could be. Sakura smiled cheekily at him, but was interrupted in her explanation by the man in question.

"It's true. Kazekage-sama will have to find his own woman." Shikamaru nodded in greeting to Gaara and slid his arm around Sakura's waist. "This one is taken, despite your best efforts."

Temari just huffed. "Oi, you make it sound like I'm trying to take her for myself." Her face twisted into a devious grin. "If that were true, she'd already be mine."

Shikamaru pulled Sakura closer to him while she shook with laughter, enjoying the way her curves fit against his side. "I'd like to think that she has better taste than that." He squinted in thought. "Though considering her track record …"

Sakura elbowed him in the ribs and he grunted in pain, letting go of her to rub at them with a frown on his face. She just put her nose in the air and said, "One day I'm going to accidentally break them and it will be your own fault."

He chose not to respond to that. "Should we go meet with Tsunade-sama?"

She looked at him suspiciously. "Why are you suddenly so eager to play politician?" Sakura looked over Temari's shoulder to where Tsunade was still standing Onoki, surely hearing all about his aching bones and bad hip. She saw Hachiro trying and failing to charm Shizune, who was stone-faced and only distantly pleasant. "Oh, I see now." Sakura grinned at him. "Shall we, darling?"

Temari laughed and tugged at an unmoving Gaara, who eyed her with reproach. "We'll come with you. It will be good for … diplomatic relations." She sent a pleading look to her brother, who stood with a imperceptible sigh, his robes falling into straight, unwrinkled lines.

They approached the other group and Shizune set a look of mute appeal to Sakura over Hachiro's shoulder and she smiled viciously. Oh yes, I'm coming to help.

"Hachiro-san! It is so nice to see you again!" The man started at his name and turned around with a practiced smile, only to freeze when he saw Sakura on Shikamaru's arm. "I was just telling Shikamaru what a shame it was that we didn't get to say goodbye to you at the party!"

The man looked ready to bolt. "Ah, Sakura …-san. Yes, how lucky for us that you are here today."

"Well, I did have a responsibility to my shishou, after all." She nodded at Tsunade, who was valiantly faking interest in Onoki's health concerns while Gaara stood with them stoically.

"I wasn't aware that Hokage-sama had two beautiful apprentices."

Sakura shrugged modestly. "Shizune is very talented and Tsunade-shishou relies on her for many things. I'm still learning."

The man brightened, sensing weakness. "Ah, so you are just starting out?"

Shikamaru had to cut in. "Sakura has been training under Hokage-sama for five years, Hachiro-san. She's very much in demand in the field." Sakura shot him a look and he just smiled blandly at her.

Temari was not to be outdone. "Yeah, they just send her out when they want someone pummeled." Shikamaru nodded in confirmation and two of them grinned at Hachiro while Sakura just rolled her eyes. Shizune was slightly confused at the way the conversation had turned, but didn't question it. Hachiro had been oily and insincere the minute she and Tsunade had arrived to speak with the Tsuchikage; it was in her best interest not interfere with driving him away diplomatically.

"O-of course. You must a very capable kunoichi, Sakura-san."

Sakura casually cracked her knuckles and then looped her arm back through Shikamaru's and smiled at him daintily. "I get by, Hachiro-san. I just enjoy being given the opportunity to meet so many new and interesting people."

Shizune was happy to introduce a new topic of conversation. "This is very true, Hachiro-san. Why just last month, I met a wonderful woman, Madame Fujiwara, who is a veteran of all three shinobi wars. The stories she could tell!" She tapped her chin thoughtfully. "You know, she had a tattoo on her forehead like Tsunade-sama's seal, but she would never tell me what it did."

Hachiro inched backwards slowly, looking for an escape from their gleaming eyes. "Saburo!" he nearly screamed as he recognized his cousin across the room and bowed to the group hastily. "I should meet with him before we depart. It was a pleasure meeting you all." He left swiftly, before any of them could respond.

Shizune cocked an eyebrow at the three younger people as they all cracked up laughing, attracting the attention of their kages. "Sakura?"

Sakura was bent double and lifted an arm toward Shizune, flapping it uselessly while she trembled with mirth. "J-just an inside joke." She straightened and then leaned heavily on Shikamaru, who had recovered from his own bout of laughter. Temari was wiping tears from her eyes.

Their leaders had joined the group with Gaara eying his sister curiously. Onoki grumped at them irritably. "Where did my idiotic cousin get off to? I'm tired of standing around."

"He went to go find Saburo-san, Tsuchikage-sama." He ambled off without another word to them, grumbling to himself.

"Well," Tsunade said. "It looks like you three were having a fine time here."

Sakura nodded sagely. "A rousing discussion of the importance of first impressions."

"Mmm," Tsunade didn't look convinced, but she didn't pursue the thought and turned to Shizune. "Come on, it's past my drinking time." Gaara and Temari also made their excuses to leave, needing to sleep for their early morning departure back to Suna.

Sakura waved as they left and then looked around the arena, seeing that it was mostly empty except for a handful of straggling Konoha genin and a few chunin who were cleaning up. "Looks like they all abandoned you to me."

Shikamaru pulled her close. "I'm doomed."

He meant it sarcastically, but he felt like maybe it was also a serious problem. Sakura had dominated his thoughts the entire time they were apart, when he was doing paperwork, when he was playing shogi with his father, especially when he was alone. Their transition from friends to dating had been so smooth, he had nearly forgotten that she had not been his for all that long. He knew that she felt strongly for him, though they hadn't spoken of it since she had confessed to him before she left for Suna months ago. In fact, he never even told her how he felt. He just assumed she knew and Sakura had never pressed him for more. It was a habit of hers.

"Sakura, I think-"

"Sakura-chan!" Shikamaru just dropped his head to her shoulder as she looked around to see who had called her. What have I done to deserve all these interruptions? I try to be a good person.

"Kakashi-sensei!" At least it's not Naruto this time.

"Yo. You doing okay?" Shikamaru was vaguely impressed that the man managed to use only one eye to convey a casual threat when he saw someone who was not Naruto draped over Sakura.

"I haven't seen you since you got back from your last mission!" Sakura narrowed her eyes. "Especially strange, since I'm sure you needed to come to the hospital."

"Maa, Sakura-chan. I'm fine. No need to worry." She disengaged from Shikamaru's arms and patted Kakashi down, ignoring his words.

"That eye of yours is a chakra drain, sensei. I can't not worry about you." She finished her examination and smiled at him. "Speaking of, I've been having great success with Sasuke-kun's eyes. If you let me take a look at yours, I can try to modify my treatment plan."

He rubbed the back of his head. "Eh, you know I don't like hospitals, Sakura-chan."

"Come to my apartment. Or I'll go to yours. I don't care. I just want to make sure you don't collapse of chakra exhaustion in the middle of nowhere again." She pointed a finger at him accusingly. "Don't think I don't remember what happened in Wave Country!"

"Fine, fine. Whatever you say, Sakura-chan. Speaking of my apartment, though …"

Listening to them speak so familiarly, Shikamaru was starting to feel like an intruder, something he hadn't felt since he had first come upon her in the forest. Naruto's close friendship with Sakura had never felt threatening to him, but the relationship she shared with Kakashi was clearly different.

"Shikamaru helped!" Sakura had grabbed his arm and dragged him into the conversation that he had lost track of.

Shikamaru shook his head. "I don't know what she's implying, but it's probably not true."

She glared at him and said, "Kakashi-sensei asked about his beautiful new planter."

"Ah, that. I definitely had nothing to do with it." He moved away before she could elbow him in the ribs again and continued. "I am a law abiding citizen of Konoha."

"So this hideous planter just magically appeared in my very much still locked and trapped apartment? And my laundry cleaned itself miraculously?" Kakashi looked at Sakura skeptically, not buying their denial for one second.

She shrugged. "Weirder things have happened."

He sighed, knowing that she wasn't going to crack. "I wish I could refute that." Kakashi looked between them and said, "So this is a thing now?"

Sakura pouted at him. "Do you have a problem, Kakashi-sensei?" Shikamaru felt a stab of alarm. Sakura's attachment to all her teammates was a defining part of her personality. What if the Kakashi said he disapproved and she felt like she had to leave him? Objectively, he didn't think there was anything wrong with him, but this was Hatake Kakashi, the Copy Nin. Who knows what his standards were for someone as precious as Sakura?

His fears were eased somewhat as Kakashi said. "I'm just happy to see you're over Sasuke. He was never going to be right for you."

Sakura huffed. "He's barely right for himself." She lowered her voice and leaned toward him. "He wants to resurrect his clan now, you know."

The man rubbed his masked chin. "He did say that was a goal back then, didn't he?"

"Yes! The worst part is that he asked me to marry him."

"Huh. Makes sense."

"What?!" Her hand tightened where it was still wrapped around Shikamaru's arm.

"Well, who else was he going to ask? Naruto?" Sakura went still and his eye widened. "Don't tell me he-"

"No, of course not! But maybe they should, you know, think about it."

"Sakura-chan, what are you up to?"

Sakura met his gaze defiantly. "Naruto and Sasuke could really work. They'll figure it out eventually. I'm just trying to make sure it's sooner rather than later."

Kakashi addressed Shikamaru directly for the first time. "Can't you stop her?"

Shikamaru just shrugged. "It makes her happy. Plus, have you tried to keep Sakura from something she wanted? I don't recommend it."

He grunted his agreement and sighed in resignation. "Konoha is doomed the first time they have sex."

Chapter Text

Sakura hummed while she flowed chakra directly to Sasuke's optic nerve, the process nearly a habit at this point. She was still floating the high on her late night spent in bed with Shikamaru, who had shed his lazy demeanor strictly for her benefit.

"Sakura."

"Hmm?"

"Please stop looking so happy. It's disgusting."

She glared down at her patient, their faces inches apart. He wasn't smiling, but she could see a faint smirk lingering on his lips. She huffed, annoyed to be the cause of his amusement, but still happy he was acting more like a real person with emotions.

"This is just my face, Sasuke-kun. Surely you've grown used to it by now."

"I haven't had much of a choice otherwise."

Sakura pouted at him, her chakra not wavering as she said, "I'm hurt, Sasuke-kun. I thought we were friends."

He just stared at her, the smirk replaced by a studiously blank look. "We are friends." He was silent as she finished with his left eye for the day and withdrew her chakra for a moment. "Sakura, as a friend, would you do me a favor?"

She heaved a huge sigh, already wary of the direction this conversation was going. "I would love to just say yes, but you have a bad track record of proposing marriage. What's the favor?"

A muscle in his jaw ticked as he clenched his teeth and then let out a deep breath, clearly steeling himself. "Tell me … how do you know if you're interested in someone?"

Sakura sat down abruptly on her stool, too surprised to speak. He stared at her impassively from the exam table, awaiting her answer. Who is he and what has he done with Sasuke-kun? She nearly asked this aloud, catching herself at the last moment. "W-what? Do you have someone you like, Sasuke-kun?"

He looked up at the ceiling, avoiding her eyes. "I don't know. That's why I'm asking you."

How do you not know?! Sakura despaired inside her own head. Naruto would be better at this.

Her eyes widened at her own thought. Unless the person is Naruto. Sasuke-kun would never ask him these questions.

"Hmm, well. I mean, I imagine the little things are different for everyone. For me, it starts out with wanting to be with them all the time, no matter what we could be doing. Everything is better with the person you like by your side." She smiled, thinking of all the simple meals she shared with Shikamaru. "It could be as simple as grocery shopping or sparring-" she shot a look at Sasuke, who hadn't moved, but she could tell he was listening, "-or even performing really terrible D-Rank missions together." He looked over at her and she smiled softly at him.

"Is that it?"

"That's really the beginning and the end. The further you fall for someone, the more you want to be around them. But you also can feel anxious or tingly or even nauseated when you're around them too."

"Nauseated? This sounds more like a disease."

Sakura smiled behind her hand. "I guess I'm talking more about before you share your feelings. It's scary to keep all that bottled up not knowing if they will like you back." She grinned at him sheepishly. "Or if they'll just keep rejecting you constantly."

She could see the faint smirk back on his face. "Yes, that must sting." Sakura slapped his arm playfully and he grunted. She continued her lecture on romantic interest.

"Regardless, when you like someone, everything about them attracts you. I imagine that once you've been together for a long time, you find things about them that annoy you, but in the beginning even annoying things can be endearing."

"Like what?" He was listening intensely now and she thought maybe, maybe it is Naruto. Why else would he be interested in irritating habits that suddenly become charming?

Sakura drummed her fingers thoughtfully against the exam bed. "Like when Shikamaru falls asleep everywhere. That would just be really irritating if I kept trying to hang out with Kakashi-sensei or Naruto and found them asleep at the table." She shrugged. "But it's cute when he does it."

Sasuke scowled. "He falls asleep on your dates?" He seemed almost offended on her behalf, which Sakura found oddly sweet.

She waggled a finger at him. "He falls asleep before our dates, since I always seem to be late because of a certain troublesome patient of mine."

The scowl stayed in place. "Now you sound like him too."

"Side effect of spending a lot of time with the person you like. You adopt some of their traits." She looked at the time and internally checked her own chakra levels. She should have enough for another thirty minutes on Sasuke's eyes with plenty to spare for Kakashi, if she could track him down.

Sakura pushed back his long bangs as she laid her hand on his right temple. She connected to his chakra pathways easily, an intimacy that twelve year old Sakura would have been ecstatic to share with him. Now, she was just happy that she didn't have to concentrate so deeply to achieve the same result.

He was silent for a few long moments as she let her mind wander to how she would tackle the trouble of Kakashi's implant. "What about sex?"

She made a horrible noise as she struggled out of her own head and kept her hand steady only because she was an experienced medic. "What about it?"

"How do you know if you want to have sex with them or if you just like them?"

Sakura considered it. "Usually, one goes with the other, especially at our age. But you don't ever have to have sex with someone you're with unless you want to." She felt awkward giving Sasuke a talk about consent, but considering she had already handled his balls in a professional capacity, it was not actually the weirdest thing they had done together.

He snorted. "I know that. But how do you separate sex from other … feelings?" He closed his eyes as he asked and from her vantage point so close to his face, she could see the faintest tint of pink on his cheeks.

"Well, in my admittedly limited experience, it's better if they aren't separated."

"How so?"

She squinted at him doubtfully. "Are you just trying to get information on my sex life, Sasuke-kun?"

He tried for a falsely innocent tone, one that she suspected he had stolen from her. "Isn't that what friends do?"

"If I weren't trying to heal your eyes right now, I would hit you."

Sasuke breathed through his nose quietly. "I meant it. I don't understand how it could be better. You know what my experience was like."

"Yes, poor Karin. What is she doing now that you've come back?"

He shrugged one shoulder, seemingly unconcerned. "Last I heard, she and Suigetsu were together in Earth Country. That was before I arrived in Suna."

Sakura smiled. "You never were much of a letter writer."

"I'm sorry."

Her eyes widened and she thought that her poor heart couldn't handle all the shocks he was giving it this afternoon. "For what, Sasuke-kun?"

"For not being much of a letter writer. Naruto …" he trailed off at the name, considering his next words. "Naruto said you were upset by it."

Sakura laughed weakly. "It would have been nice to hear directly from you, but at least your messages to Naruto let me know you were alive."

"Hn." Apparently he had exhausted his word allotment for the time being, so she went back to thinking of ways she could find her former sensei and keep him in one place long enough to examine him. Maybe if I threaten to tell Gai-sensei how to get into his apartment? It was an extreme measure, but one she was willing to take if it meant that she could help Kakashi's constant chakra exhaustion. He was such a baby about hospitals. Men, honestly.

"Sakura, you never answered my question."

Now that sounds familiar. I am forever avoiding questions from you, Sasuke-kun.

"I know you're no gossip, Sasuke-kun, but I've never really talked about this with anyone. Not even Ino-Pig, though she surely would love to hear details." Sakura furrowed her brow. "Well, maybe not about Shikamaru. That's probably too close to home for even her. Maybe. She's a weird one, that girl."

"Sakura …"

"Fine, fine. Once upon a time, I had sex with a guy that I didn't really care all that much for and it was okay and that was it. I mostly did it to get it over with." She made a face at her own reasoning. "When I'm with Shikamaru, things are just … enhanced. Brighter. Everything feels like it's happening so much, to use a nonsensical phrase."

"Every time?"

She arched an eyebrow at him. "Are you asking frequency now? Maybe I was wrong about your gossiping habits, Sasuke-kun." He managed to stare at her balefully with his eyes closed, an impressive feat. "Yes, every time. I mean, we're not like an old couple by any means, so that's not surprising."

"Do you love him?"

"Yes." There was no hesitation in her answer, something that seemed to surprise Sasuke a little, if she read his slight brow twitch correctly. She had spent the last two years slowly falling for Shikamaru, though it had taken forever for him to get the hint once she decided on her own that it was going to happen. She wasn't ashamed to admit it. Though now that I think of it, I'm not sure I've ever actually told him …

"How did you know?"

Sakura shrugged. "It's same as liking someone romantically, just a lot more intense. It's scary and exciting and you just want to give yourself, all of yourself, to that feeling." She removed her hand from his temple, fondly brushing his long hair back again. "It's pretty much the best thing in my life."

"Hn." He sat up and rubbed his eyes carefully and she ran him through his levels of Sharingan again, to see how the pathways held up against the last few weeks of treatment. Despite his more obvious sagging when the Mangekyo sapped him of chakra, all his optical circuitry remained intact.

"Well," she said, scribbling down notes in her extensive Sasuke file, "You are definitely no longer in danger of going blind. Several more treatment sessions and you'll be better than new."

"And then what?" Sasuke sounded … worried?

"Hmm? Well, we'll have to continue with monthly visits for check-ups, but other than that, your time is your own, Sasuke-kun." She tapped her pen against the clipboard. "I know the chakra seals must be driving you crazy."

"A year of sealed chakra was better than I expected."

"Me too," she admitted, softly. "I know of at least two Council members who were dead set on your execution. Still are, actually."

Sasuke sat rigidly on the exam table for a moment before sliding off to gracefully land on his feet. Sakura sighed in envy. No matter his power level, Sasuke had always moved like a dancer. It wasn't fair that he got to be so pretty and elegant.

"But Naruto and I are here for you. And Kakashi-sensei too. Take advantage of this second chance to do something you want to do, Sasuke-kun. Rather than something you feel like you have to do."

"And what is that?"

She gave into the urge to hug him, which he accepted stiffly, before pushing him toward the door. "That's something you have to figure out for yourself. Let me know if I can help." She slid the door open and walked him out, turning to lock it. "But no more proposals!"

Sakura watched her prey take the bait and crept up slowly, slowly, inch by inch, silent as the grave. Her quarry looked up suddenly, feeling a presence but not knowing where it was. She froze and then sprang her trap, who was actually her long-suffering boyfriend.

"Kagemane no jutsu!"

Kakashi looked defeated as he stood within Shikamaru's shadow, the newest signed Icha Icha dangling from his fingertips. "I should have known this was too good to be true."

Sakura bounded up to him with a wide smile. "You should really hide your weaknesses better, Kakashi-sensei. Think about if I were a real enemy." He muttered something beneath his breath and she was sure it was just compliments about her ambush skills.

"Are we going to stand here all day?" Shikamaru complained from his hiding spot behind a large oak tree.

"That's entirely up to you, Shika-kun. You're the one who trapped Kakashi-sensei."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Your implication won't work. I'm sure he knows who the real mastermind was." Sakura just blew him a kiss before turning to face Kakashi once more, who was trying to read the pages of his book where it had nearly slipped from his grasp.

"Sensei, I'll let you keep the book if you let me take a look at your eye. It's a good deal."

"Sakura-chan, I'm very busy today. And for the next, oh, forever."

She put her hands on her hips menacingly. "I will take that book away from you and so help me, if you don't agree to my deal I will have Shikamaru keep you here while I burn your collection."

Kakashi looked aghast at the very idea and Shikamaru was wearing a familiar pained expression that clearly stated he was very much against being used in this manner. Years of experience told her that Kakashi was clearly pouting under his mask and she grinned triumphantly.

"Fine. But not at the hospital!"

"I already told you that was okay, back when you agreed to do this the first time." She nodded at Shikamaru, who let his shadows recede. "We'll go to my place and I'll make dinner after."

"Eggplant?"

She rolled her eyes. "Sure, sensei. We can have eggplant." Sakura looped her arm through his, mostly so that he wouldn't try to escape. He would protested if he hadn't already opened his new book to read after she agreed.

Shikamaru stood by, feeling slightly awkward. When Sakura had asked for his help after leaving the hospital, he had not expected this. Though, knowing her as well as he did, he really should have. He was about to leave, when she used her free hand to tug him along with them. "Come on, Shikamaru. We'll all have dinner together. It will be like I have two handsome boyfriends."

He raised his eyebrows at that, feeling a weird spot of jealousy rise up in place of his awkwardness. "I didn't sign up for polygamy."

"No fun at all," she said, but squeezed his hand and smiled at him as she said it, loosening the knot in his chest. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Kakashi-sensei is saving himself for marriage." Shikamaru nearly choked on his laughter as the man muttered to himself again, this time about "disrespectful students and their accomplice boyfriends".

They made their way back to Sakura's apartment without further incident, though Shikamaru couldn't be positive Sakura's accidental grope on his ass was truly an accident. She smirked at him as she ushered Kakashi inside and he was then immensely sure it wasn't, not one bit.

He was so lucky.

Shikamaru waited comfortably in her familiar living room as she tended to Kakashi in the privacy of her bedroom. He wasn't actually jealous of her relationship with her sensei, he reasoned to himself. Just of their history. The bonds that form on a team and during life-or-death missions were not to be taken lightly and he knew that Sakura was closer to her former genin team than most people were. He had known that when becoming friends with her and he had known that entering in the relationship. So why did he still feel that irrational pull whenever they were around?

"Shikamaru?"

He was startled out of his thoughts by her quiet voice. "Done already?"

She shushed him and motioned them toward the kitchen. "I knocked him out. He doesn't sleep as much as he should."

Shikamaru stared at her incredulously while she grabbed a cutting board and knife for the eggplants she had purchased. "You knocked out Hatake Kakashi? How did you manage that?"

"Such little faith you have in me, darling." She waved the knife at him mock-threateningly. "I was connected to his chakra pathways directly, I could do anything to him I wanted. So I chose to put him to sleep."

"That's good information to have. I'll be sure to avoid it in the future."

She grinned wickedly at him. "You do most anything I want without it anyway." Shikamaru felt his cheeks grow warm, knowing she was right. He prepared the rice without being asked and then leaned against the counter and watched her drop the thick slices of eggplant into the hot pan, humming. Now was a good time.

"I love you."

"W-what?" Sakura nearly dropped her tongs and then whirled around, eyes wide.

Shikamaru couldn't back out now and really, he didn't want to. "I love you." She nearly tackled him before he could finish speaking, eyes sparkling and kissed him senseless. When he drew back after several long moments, breathless, she put a hand on his cheek fondly.

"Obviously, I love you too." She caressed his cheek and he kissed at her fingertips. "I swear, after the day I've had, my heart is going to give out with all these surprises."

"This was a surprise to you?"

She looked thoughtful and then shook her head. "Not your feelings. I was pretty determined to get you there eventually." She grinned at him, unrepentant at her manipulations. "But I wasn't expecting it here, in the kitchen while I make dinner."

"Is that bad?" Maybe he should have waited to make it special? Ino had always harped on about romance and flowers and candle-lit dinners, but he had tried to tune her out over the years. But Sakura deserved those things, if she wanted them.

She gave him another lingering kiss, warming him to his toes. "Nope, it was perfectly you, all the way down to telling me when my back was turned."

"Thanks, I think." She let go of him to tend to the food, adding a plethora of other ingredients before sliding it all into the oven. "So what other surprises did you have today?"

Sakura paused in the act of washing her hands and laughed. "You'll never believe it when I tell you."

Chapter Text

"Sakura, how are your treatments on the Uchiha going?"

She shrugged. "Better than expected, actually. He's responding very well to the chakra reconstruction of the pathways behind the optic nerve. Sasuke should be fully healed within a month or so, barring unforeseen circumstances."

Tsunade shuffled paperwork on her desk. "I might have one of those circumstances here. A small village outside of Tazaku Gai is currently under quarantine. They've managed to send a messenger to us for aid."

Sakura was in her serious medic mode immediately. "What's the illness?"

"A mutated version of influenza. It's only resulted in two deaths so far, but they only have one healer and his apprentice. They are completely overwhelmed and cannot handle the number of patients they're gaining every day." Tsunade looked at her sharply. "I have every confidence that you can handle this. I'm sending Hinata and a team of chunin medics with you as field leader. Cure the town, lift the quarantine."

Sakura nodded. "When should we leave?"

"I'll assemble your team now. Meet them back in my office in one hour, prepare for overnight travel. Dismissed."

Sakura left the office, mind already on overdrive. She thought of all the things she needed to bring, assuming that the town would be severely understocked in medical supplies. I'll use the chunin like packhorses if I have to. Ah, the joys of being team leader!

She was so preoccupied with her mental packing that she nearly ran into Shikamaru where he was slouched outside her apartment.

"Oh! I'm sorry." He grabbed her arms to steady her and she leaned up to kiss his nose. "Hi, you. Were you waiting for me?"

"I just got here. I was hoping to take you to out." He wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face in her hair. "I missed you today."

Sakura giggled. "No one will ever believe that Nara Shikamaru is a big gooey sap."

He muttered into her hair. "That's because you won't actually tell anyone."

She sighed against his chest. "Caught me. I like to keep this part of you to myself." She pulled back regretfully. "I would love to go and parade ourselves around Konoha, but Tsunade-shishou just handed me a mission."

Shikamaru frowned. "What kind of mission?"

"Medical. I'll be out of the village for at least two weeks, probably closer to three."

"Hmm." He pulled her close again. "No, I don't accept."

"Like you have much of a choice," Sakura said dryly. He didn't reply and just continued nuzzling her neck. "Shikamaru! I have to get back and meet my team in less than an hour."

He gently pushed her toward through her now open doorway, shutting it with his foot as he kissed her laughing face. "Then we'll have to make the most of our time."

After sending a breathless (and late) Sakura off to the Hokage Tower, Shikamaru wandered through Konoha aimlessly. He had been looking forward to spending the night out with Sakura, an unusual circumstance for him to find himself in. Shikamaru had recently felt an embarrassing need to stake his claim publicly on her, even though everyone important already knew. If he didn't watch himself, he was going to pee on her leg like some sort of rabid Inuzuka.

In his wanderings, he spotted Choji eating with Asuma-sensei through the windows of Yakiniku Q and decided to join them. He wasn't interested in being alone just yet.

He waved at them lazily as he approached and Choji waved a piece of pork belly at him in greeting. "Shikamaru! I didn't expect to see you here."

He sat down next to Asuma and nodded at him. "I didn't expect to be here. Sakura just left on a mission."

"Ah." Choji nodded knowingly. "And we're your second choice. I get it."

Asuma laughed. "I'm hurt, Shikamaru. Aren't we your favorite team?"

Shikamaru poured himself tea after offering to the others, who declined. "I hate to say it, but I would rather look at Sakura than your faces." He took a sip of his tea. "Never mind, I didn't hate to say that."

Choji mocked him in between bites. "I never thought you'd be this disgusting when you fell in love, Shikamaru. It's surreal."

He felt his cheeks warm and he kicked at Choji under the table before laying his head down. "Shut up."

Asuma joined gleefully. "I remember how annoying you all were when I first hooked up with Kurenai. Now you know what it's like."

Shikamaru turned his head to glare at his former sensei. "I was twelve! Everyone is annoying when they're twelve."

The man shrugged, unrepentant. "Doesn't matter. You're getting your just desserts now, my friend."

Choji started on another plate of beef. "You know, I always thought you might get together with Temari. You seemed to be your version of interested for a while."

Shikamaru felt horrified at the idea and he was sure his face conveyed the emotion well enough. "She may be attractive, but Temari would probably murder her man before anything got interesting. I have no interest in becoming one of her victims."

Asuma choked on his own tea, but Choji just looked at him strangely. "How is Sakura any different? I've seen her shatter rocks with a finger."

He shrugged. "She doesn't create mayhem wherever she goes." He kept the fact that she just plotted mayhem and used other people to carry it out entirely to himself. He actually sort of loved that about her, a tiny bit.

"Well," Choji grinned an awful grin, something that indicated bad things were going to happen, "My mother already loves her. I can only imagine what Yoshino-san has been saying to you lately."

He groaned. "She's been asking me increasingly obvious questions lately, like 'what do you think of this formal kimono?' and 'how do you feel about a spring wedding?' It's terrifying."

Asuma clapped him on the back heartily. "I always thought it would be Ino who would get married first out of all of you! She's had her wedding planned out for years."

"I think Ino's having too much fun seeing how many people she can date at once to get married any time soon, Asuma-sensei," Choji said sagely. "Her last record was six, I think. Before that chunin with the hair got upset about it."

Shikamaru put up a hand to stop him. "I've already heard entirely too much about that chunin with the hair, thanks." He then grumbled to himself. "I'm not getting married just yet, you know. I have a choice in these things too."

Choji snorted. "You'd probably have a better time convincing your mother of that if you didn't take Sakura to one of our clan dinners on what was basically your second date."

Facedown on the table, Shikamaru said, "You guys are the worst. Why am I here again?"

They chanted together. "Because you miss Sakura!"

He sat up in defeat. "Just because you're right doesn't mean I have to sit here and listen to it. Choji, tell me about your team. Distract me."

His best friend grinned at him, but didn't push the subject further. "Well, they were real disappointed that I didn't nominate them for the Chunin Exams, but they got over it pretty quickly when I showed them a new doton jutsu. Were we that easily distracted, Asuma-sensei?"

Asuma laughed. "I couldn't physically move Ino if Sasuke was ever in the area and Shikamaru once fell asleep in the middle of shuriken practice. You tell me."

"Oi," Shikamaru said, feeling the need to defend himself. "I only did that once."

"Because Ino threw a shuriken right through your hair!" Asuma rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I think that was the fastest I've ever seen you move."

Shikamaru regretted ever stepping foot inside the restaurant.

A week later, Shikamaru was busily helping his father in the Intelligence Division, picking up shifts just to fill his time. Shikaku looked at him and shook his head. "You got it bad, kid."

"Ugh, not you too." He tried to concentrate on decoding the mess of symbols on the scroll that a chunin team had accidentally intercepted the day before by killing the messenger. As a whole, Mist nin seemed to have the worst handwriting. He squinted at an unintelligible figure and turned the page upside down, hoping it would make more sense.

Shikaku plucked it out of his hands and waved him away. "Go do your moping somewhere else, Shikamaru. Or better yet, go visit your mother."

He grimaced and decided that he was definitely not going to do that, not if he wanted to leave his childhood home without promising his mother she'd have grandchildren within the next year.

Wandering out the doors, he stared up at the friendly blue sky and decided that some cloud watching was in order. There was a meadow with high hills right by the Nara Forest that would be perfect for today. Shikamaru walked there leisurely, not in a hurry to expend more effort than necessary.

"Yo." Kakashi appeared out of nowhere and fell into step beside him. "Have you seen Sakura-chan?" They passed out of the main part of town toward the training grounds.

He sighed heavily. "Sakura is on a mission for at least another week or maybe two, from what she said before she left." He couldn't see it, but he could feel Kakashi give him a pitying look. This was getting out of hand. "Yes, I miss her, please stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?" Kakashi's innocent voice wouldn't have fooled a small child. "I always look like this."

"Right," Shikamaru said wryly. "What did you want with Sakura, anyway?"

"Ah, well." The man scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I was actually hoping she would take a look at my eye again. But I was going to argue with her about it for a while first."

"You know I'm just going to tell her you said that, right?"

Kakashi shrugged. "Sakura knows how it works." Shikamaru was confused. How what works? The strange balance that her relationships with her teams seemed to thrive on? He figured he could be with her for a hundred years and never fully understand the intricacy of Team 7's weird hang ups and quirks.

He was going to reply when they both heard a noise from the training ground he had just decided to cut through to get to his perfect meadow. Shikamaru was hesitant to investigate, because it definitely sounded like some sort of strangled moan and he wasn't sure he wanted to see if it was the sexy type or the dying type.

Kakashi didn't seem to be nearly as hesitant. His sensitive nose didn't pick up any blood and he grinned behind his mask and whispered loudly to Shikamaru. "Looks like somebody's having some afternoon delight, Shikamaru-kun. Shall we interrupt?"

He was not at all inclined to join in on Kakashi's fun, but considering the grip the man suddenly had on his arm, it was obvious the question was rhetorical. Clearly he was enjoying the prospect of embarrassing someone a little too much. With a mentor like this, Shikamaru no longer wondered how Sakura came into her eccentric personality.

Kakashi crept and Shikamaru was forcibly dragged across the ground quietly toward the source of the noise, a large tree facing the Nara Forest. As they got closer, Shikamaru could definitely hear murmurs and then that horribly intimate moan again. Definitely no dying happening behind the tree.

Kakashi paused and seemed to recognize the presences before they came into view, because his shoulders drooped and he sighed. "Sakura-chan is going to be ecstatic."

Before Shikamaru could question him, the man shunshined to the side of the tree for a dramatic entrance. "Good afternoon, boys!"

Boys? He thought to himself and then his eyes widened. "Ugh." Naruto and Sasuke were scrambling away from the tree and their scarily amused teacher. Shikamaru could see the Uchiha pulling up his pants hurriedly with Naruto wiping his mouth and shut his eyes tightly. "I could have lived my whole life without seeing this, Kakashi. Why did you have to interrupt them?"

"Well," Kakashi said and his tone boded ill will for everyone, "There was just so much noise, I had to make sure everything was okay. It is my duty as a Konoha shinobi to protect the village, after all."

Sasuke's face was bright red, something Shikamaru was sure he would never see again in his life. He didn't even know the Uchiha was even capable of human emotions like embarrassment and now he had just found that the other boy was apparently capable of many human things.

Naruto laughed, though it was a little high-pitched. "Ah, Kakashi-sensei, don't be like that. We were just …"

They both raised their eyebrows at him as he trailed off, struggling for an explanation other than the obvious.

He shrugged helplessly. "Well, you know what we were doing."

"Idiot," Sasuke hissed and smacked him on the back of the head. Shikamaru charitably thought that it seemed a lot less violent than usual.

He sighed and turned to Kakashi. "You were right. Sakura is going to be ecstatic." He grimaced at the thought. "And she'll probably make me recount every horrifying detail."

Chapter Text

Shikamaru was woken abruptly by a knock on his window. Kakashi was standing outside, demeanor unusually serious. "Tsunade-sama has summoned us."

He was annoyed. It was only a few days before Sakura was likely to come back and Shikamaru didn't want to be sent on a mission now just to miss her homecoming. Still, he dragged himself out of bed and dressed quickly, following Kakashi across the rooftops while yawning. They were met at the Hokage Tower by a bleary-eyed Naruto with Kiba and Neji arriving only a moment behind them. Tsunade looked surprisingly awake and just as serious as Kakashi. Shikamaru was starting to feel dread sink deep into his stomach. Something was very wrong.

"Some of you may know that Konoha recently sent out a medical team to a small town suffering from an mutated influenza outbreak." His stomach twisted and he could see Naruto's eyes snap into focus. "I have just received word that the entire town is gone. Including our team."

Shikamaru could feel the blood drain out of his face and he stared at Tsunade uncomprehendingly while she continued. "You are to investigate and find our medics and the townspeople. I hate to send this specific team," she glanced at Shikamaru's white face, Naruto's shaking hands, Neji's stiff demeanor, "because nearly all of you will be emotionally compromised, but your individual skills are the best we have for this mission." Distantly, Shikamaru remembered that Hinata was with Sakura on this mission. "Kakashi is field leader and he has the previous mission details. You are to leave once you are full briefed. Dismissed."

Shikamaru felt rooted to the spot, but Kakashi's hand on his arm broke him out of his daze. He laid out the entirety of Sakura's mission, which sounded clear cut and basic for a medical emergency. Tsunade had given them the daily status reports that Sakura had sent and Shikamaru looked them over with frustration, not seeing anything amiss. The last one was dated two days ago and was just the same as the others, careful tabulations of patients cured and their rate of recovery with a cheerful note at the bottom about how they hadn't had any new infections in over a week. She would have been home tomorrow, if everything stayed the same. What happened?

They traveled for hours at top speed, Kakashi pushing them to their limits. No one complained, though Kiba was looking thoroughly spooked by Naruto's uncharacteristic silence. This trend continued for the next two days, speaking at a minimum. As they drew closer to the town, Neji's Byakugan was consistently activated, looking for anything that may lead them to their lost comrades. And betrothed if I remember correctly. The Hyuugas are pretty fond of keeping it in the family.

Thinking uncharitable thoughts about others kept him from contemplating the horrible things that could be happening to Sakura, though it didn't get rid of the overwhelming distress that burned throughout his body and settled in his chest.

The group came to the entrance of the town in midday and it looked completely normal. Lights were on, buildings were standing without damage and there was even laundry flapping around on several lines. The only thing missing were the people. It was disturbingly quiet as they paced through, Kakashi with Shikamaru, Neji with Kiba and Naruto by himself.

Shikamaru could see that the fruit in the small stands in the market square had started to rot, indicating that they had been there for several days. Kakashi had summoned his ninken as soon as they had arrived and was conferring with them, before sending them all off in different directions again. Sakura loves those dogs.

He shook his head, as if to physically remove the intrusive thoughts. Kakashi appeared before him. "This place is a ghost town. Pakkun says that every scent he has picked up so far is at least four days old."

Shikamaru reeled in his frustration and anger as much as possible. "Right timeline. How could an entire town's worth of people just disappear? It makes no logical sense."

"Are you sure Sakura's messages didn't say anything?"

He grunted. "They were all very routine, filled with medical jargon and professional language." Except the last one. She had written a post-script for it. His eyes widened and he dug through his pack for the last report and flipped it open, looking at the exact wording Sakura had used. Is this a code? Did Sakura see this coming?

He read it aloud to Kakashi, who was still looking at him for an explanation for his hurried movements. "She wrote a post script only on the last report that Tsunade-sama received. It says 'This week has seen zero infections, though we have still been bombarded with patients. There are two who have the worst of it. The healer and his assistant are out of commission. I hope to see you all soon.' Do you think that means anything?"

Kakashi looked dubious. "That sounds pretty innocuous to me. Don't get your hopes up."

Shikamaru wasn't so sure. "If something was going on, Sakura would notice. Maybe she couldn't actively handle the problem herself." He read the message again. "Why would there still be new patients if the last person infected was over a week ago? What happened to the healer? Why would she mention two specific patients?"

Kakashi shrugged. "It's possible that the healer was just burnt out after dealing so many people. We can't know that it was because he was removed by an outside force."

"It's the closest thing we have to a clue right now, Kakashi."

Before the other man could respond, Naruto shunshined up to them, eyes glowing yellow. "Something happened about two miles south of town. There are busted trees everywhere and Sakura-chan's chakra signature was left there, but it's faint."

Kakashi whistled and Shikamaru saw Kiba's head pop up from behind the fence he was inspecting several streets down. He bounded their way, followed by his faithful shadow. "We're heading south. You and Neji stay here, search the entire town from top to bottom."

"Sounds good." Kiba clapped his hand on Shikamaru's shoulder. "We'll find them, man."

"Yeah." His throat tightened on the word. "We will."

The three of them stood among the destruction, searching for anything other than fallen trees that would indicate Sakura's whereabouts. "This is definitely Sakura's handiwork, but what would she have been doing so far away from the town on a mission?"

"Letting off a lot of steam." Naruto took in the acre of forest that had been demolished, but Kakashi shook his head and pointed at several burnt embers of wood.

"That's from a katon jutsu. Sakura-chan is powerful, but she has no real affinity for fire. Something happened here." He looked around and said with a touch of pride. "She put up one hell of a fight."

Pakkun trotted up them with a strange look on his doggy face. "She gave up. There's a spot over there where she was facing someone and then walked off with them. After twenty feet, the scent disappears entirely."

Naruto immediately protested. "Sakura-chan wouldn't just give up! Kakashi-sensei is right, she's powerful!"

Shikamaru interrupted him before he could gain steam. "If someone threatened her patients, people who couldn't defend themselves? Sakura would surrender in an instant if she thought it would save them."

Pakkun took them to the spot where the scent had disappeared for him and they searched every inch of forest, overturning rocks and inspecting the bark on the trees. It was as if she had been plucked off the very earth itself. Naruto had sat down hours ago, trying to stretch his senses as far as possible through senjutsu with no luck.

Disheartened, they trudged back to the town to meet up with Neji and Kiba. When they arrived, Shikamaru was surprised to see them sitting casually at one of the empty outdoor tables. There was someone else with them, someone alive. His heart beat faster, even though he knew it wasn't Sakura. Anything new was welcome. It would tear his attention away from the hopeless emptiness he was feeling.

Kiba turned around, having heard them coming through the trees. "Hey guys! Look who we found!" He pointed to the pale young man in front of them who shrank away as the trio's intense gaze shifted to him. "This is the healer's apprentice, Akaya. He was busy being one with the spring nearby."

Akaya covered his mouth as he spoke, but Shikamaru could see a flash of sharp teeth. "I can hide my chakra when I merge with water. But sometimes I … lose myself."

"What happened here?" Kakashi did not care about this boy's jutsus.

"Two men stumbled into town over a week ago, one of them very badly injured. Sakura-san healed them when the non-injured man pledged his service to our village for the duration of our quarantine in payment. But after she was finished, he became more and more belligerent …" Akaya trailed off, looking away.

Naruto sounded as impatient as Shikamaru felt. "What happened? Tell us!"

Akaya winced at his volume. "Two days after they arrived, I saw the first man argue with her, though I wasn't close enough to see what about. She left with him and Hinata-san was in charge until she returned. But before Sakura-san came back, the other man rose out of bed and just began taking people."

"Taking them how?"

Akaya shuddered. "His arms were like rubber and he extended them to wrap around large groups at once. Then he just disappeared without a trace, reappearing after only a few moments alone. He did this multiple times, though the medics tried to fight him off before he got to the patients." He glanced at Neji. "Hinata-san was the most successful. She had blocked off one of his arms before he threatened to kill everyone instead of just abducting them. She allowed herself to be taken to care for the patients."

Neji let out a shaky breath and they all tried their best not to stare in amazement. Shikamaru raised an eyebrow at Akaya, annoyed that he had no further information on Sakura. "And where were you this whole time?"

Akaya flushed brilliantly, pale skin showing his embarrassment like a beacon. "My shishou and I both had caught the flu not too long after the medics arrived. Our reserves were so low from healing the town. I heal quickly, especially in water, so I was in a therapy pool Sakura-san had set up. It all happened so fast …"

Kiba finished for him. "He did his weird water jutsu thing to hide and he's been here ever since. Akamaru wouldn't leave this pool alone, so Neji and I poked at it until he appeared." Neji looked slightly disgruntled at the idea of him doing anything so common as poking an enemy.

Kakashi stared down the flushing apprentice, reducing him to a shaking mess. "Is there anything at all these men may have said that would help us? Did they wear hitai-ates or indicate a direction? How was the second man injured?"

Naruto and Shikamaru didn't do anything to stop him from bombarding Akaya, intent on getting information as soon as possible. Neji was silent as well. Kiba put his hands up to ward them off. "Whoa, guys. I know you're worried, but you're not going to get anything out of him if he passes out and pisses his pants."

Akaya muttered, "Thank you. I think."

"So?"

"I didn't see any hitai-ates on the them at all and they never once mentioned where they were from. The man seemed to suffer from multiple stab wounds that would have been fatal on a civilian, though Sakura-san patched him up with no problem." His eyes brightened with admiration. "She's very talented."

Shikamaru snapped at him angrily. "And she's also very missing. Get on with it."

"When he threatened Hinata-san, he mentioned something about children. We had many patients who were younger, but I don't think he was referring to them."

Neji looked troubled. "Hinata-sama is very susceptible when it comes to providing aid to vulnerable children. If he had implied that there were more patients where he was taking them, that would have been another reason for her to back down."

Kakashi was still staring at Akaya. "I assume the man was bandaged when he arrived at the village?" Startled, the boy nodded. "I'll need those." Akaya raced toward one of the medical buildings, happy to do something useful. He soon returned with a armful of bloody cloth and hesitantly handed it to Kakashi, who summoned his pack with a speed that made even Neji's eye's widen.

Kakashi turned to Kiba, but addressed the group as a whole. "Akamaru and my ninken will take point. We'll travel as a team unless the scent paths converge. If that happens, Neji and Naruto will go with Kiba, Shikamaru with me."

Kiba waved goodbye to Akaya and then they were off through the trees, following the dogs. After a few false starts, Akamaru and Pakkun had caught the same scent and led them in a relatively straight line north of the town.

They traveled in tense silence for hours, not seeing anything extraordinary about the forest around them and feeling worse for it. Without warning, a massive fireball was launched in Naruto's direction from up ahead, followed quickly by one at Kakashi. They dropped out the trees to avoid them, with the rest of the team following suit. Naruto was slightly singed and pissed off. "What the hell? Did any of you see where that came from?"

Neji peered through the trees, eyebrows raised. "There's someone up ahead. He's just standing there."

Naruto brushed at his blackened hair and grumbled. "Would have been nice to know before he decided to barbecue us."

"He wasn't there a moment ago." Neji glanced at Kakashi. "I think he's waiting for us."

Shikamaru didn't want to stop, could barely hold himself back from leaping forward toward the man who knew where Sakura was. He was totally out of control and glad beyond measure that Kakashi was team leader. The man would make the right decisions in the field and not let his emotions guide his commands.

With this in mind, Shikamaru was still relieved when the older jonin lifted his hitai-ate to reveal his Sharingan. "Let's show our friend a good time, shall we?"

Chapter Text

Before they reached the clearing, the man was calling out to them, flames in his hand. His handsome face was strangely remorseful. "I'm sorry, but you can't have her back." Instead of being angry, Shikamaru was heartened by the words. Sakura was still alive to get back. 

Naruto jumped ahead of Kakashi and growled. "We'll take her back, you asshole. And everyone else too!"

Kakashi shrugged. "What he said. This won't end well for you. Show us where you've taken them." While he was speaking, Shikamaru could see chakra gathering in his right hand, chirping loudly.

The man had a pained look on his face. "No, I can't let you take her." He tilted forward slightly and in an instant he was in front of them, attacking both Naruto and Kakashi with a two handed katon jutsu. They evaded him relatively easily but it meant that Kakashi's chidori was less than complete when he used it against the man.

He made full contact with the man's torso, but instead of the blood and bone Shikamaru had been expecting, Kakashi's arm was completely engulfed in flames. The man had a fiery hole in his left side that was slowly knitting itself back together, smoke rising from the wound. Kakashi drew back, shaking out the fire and peeling off his blackened glove.

"Ugh, what the hell?" Kiba spoke for them all. Neji's eyes nearly bugged out of his head, obviously seeing something odd in their enemy's chakra.

Naruto decided to fill the clearing with a few dozen clones, all with the same singed blonde hair. The man took them all on, dispersing them with a wave of unbearably smoky flames and when unavoidable, allowed them to hit him and catch themselves on fire.

"His chakra is incredibly unstable." Neji muttered to Shikamaru. "Coupled with his ability to avoid physical attacks, Gentle Fist is going to be useless on him."

Shikamaru nodded to Kiba, signaling his idea. With a grin, Kiba joined the fray, yelling nonsense to Naruto. The two of them continued to batter at the man, Naruto creating more and more clones with an inexhaustible glee. Shikamaru was tired just looking at him. Slowly Kiba and Naruto's combined might were driving the man toward the edges of the clearing, where Kakashi had joined the rest of the team.

Shikamaru saw his chance. "Kagemane no jutsu!"

The man froze, confused when his body refused to obey his commands. Naruto's clones dispersed themselves while Kiba rolled his neck, grinning. "Nice, Shikamaru." He could see that the man was clearly struggling without much luck. Even fire leaves a shadow, after all.

Kakashi wasted no time questioning him. "Who are you? Where are the people you've abducted?" Neji and Kiba had retreated in opposite directions, keeping an eye out for the man's absent partner.

The man spoke through clenched teeth, "They are safe."

Calmly, Kakashi stared directly into the man's eyes. After only seconds, the man shuddered and screamed, a sound that sent cold chills down Shikamaru's spine. Despite this, his concentration did not waver. This man was the key to Sakura and he was content to let Kakashi dismantle him piece by piece if necessary.

He could see Naruto gritting his teeth on Kakashi's other side, but he didn't interrupt.

"I'll ask again," Kakashi said pleasantly. "Who are you? Where are the people you've abducted?"

The man panted, exhausted and shivering. After several minutes, he muttered lowly and Shikamaru strained to hear, but Naruto caught the words easily.

"You need her? What the hell is that supposed to mean?" He growled again, sounding more feral by the moment, his chakra wavering violently. "I swear to god, if this is some sort of trafficking bullshit, I'm gonna-" Kakashi cut him off with a sharp hand motion as the man's eyes widened.

This time he spoke loudly. "No! No, we wouldn't hurt Sakura-san! We need her to help the children!"

They all considered his words for a moment. "What children?" Kakashi was still using his pleasantly vicious voice.

The man sighed. "My name is Takeshi. My children are sick and Sakura-san is a very talented medic."

Shikamaru couldn't help himself. "So you kidnapped an entire town to hold her hostage?"

Takeshi looked like he wanted to shrug. "It seemed like the expedient thing to do. No one was injured and my children are now receiving medical care."

"I imagine Sakura didn't see it that way," Shikamaru said, thinking of the dozens of downed trees and scarred forest land.

He could see a smile forming on the man's handsome face. "She came around to my way of thinking eventually."

Neji spoke from behind them. "Wouldn't it have been easier to just find a healer who wasn't already contracted to an entire town?"

Takeshi frowned, his eyes hardening. "Not just any healer would work. My children are … unusual."

Kiba muttered, still facing away from the general group. "If they're anything like you, that's putting it mildly."

Naruto was still vibrating with tension. "So take us to Sakura-chan. If she's safe, I don't care who she agrees to heal. Your kids don't deserve to die just because you're an asshole."

Kakashi sighed, but didn't argue with him.

"You won't hurt them?"

Naruto snorted. "Not unless one of your kids is named Orochimaru."

Takeshi stiffed as much as possible while still under Shikamaru's control and hissed. "That man is an abomination." It was said with so much venom that even Neji looked slightly stunned. "Orochimaru is the entire reason I am in this situation."

"Uh …" Naruto looked at Kakashi and Shikamaru questioningly. "What? Don't tell me he's after you too?"

Takeshi smiled bitterly. "Oh no, he didn't have time for me after he took what he needed."

Shikamaru could see that the pieces fell into place for Kakashi just as he realized it himself. "Ah. I see. His human experimentation really was far-reaching. I thought we had seen all of his subordinates by now."

"I was never his subordinate!" Takeshi's eyes were glittering in anger. "He used my partner's illness to get to my bloodline. I left as soon as I could get Hayato away from there." His mouth screwed up in anger. "Not soon enough, since he turned me into this monster."

Shikamaru tried to get Kakashi's attention, signaling that he was unable to hold the jutsu for much longer. With the barest shred of acknowledgement, Kakashi pressed Takeshi into agreeing to lead them to his hideout. "We're no fans of Orochimaru. He's a missing-nin from Konoha, you know. It's kind of our job to put him down if we find him. And," he stared at the man, who didn't seem impressed. "We won't harm your children."

Takeshi sighed. "Fine. Hopefully I've stalled you long enough to let Sakura-san heal them before you take her away."

Shikamaru snorted. "It's obvious you don't actually know Sakura. If she's not done healing them when we get there, we'll being waiting until she is satisfied with her work." He released the jutsu with slight hesitation, but when Takeshi didn't immediately spring an attack, the entire group relaxed.

He noticed. "What? I said I would bring you there."

Kakashi nodded mockingly. "And I always put my full trust in people who throw fireballs at me indiscriminately."

Takeshi laughed loudly, scaring away some nearby birds. "I guess you don't live as long as you do without being paranoid, old man."

Naruto snorted and Shikamaru could hear Kiba stifle a laugh from behind him as well. Kakashi's shoulders drooped. "I'm starting to think I should dye my hair."

This time it was Shikamaru's turn to laugh. "Just ask Sakura. I'm sure she'd be thrilled to help you."

Kakashi shuddered. "Let's just go fetch her first, yes?"

Takeshi led them to the mouth of a large cavern, dispelling several genjutsu on his way. Shikamaru was impressed the sheer volume of traps on the way to his home; it was clear he was a talented in more ways than just his katon jutsu. After the last fell away, the group was greeted by a large, dark haired man wearing loose robes. He stood by the entrance imposingly and they all tensed until he sighed and said, "Jig's up, huh?"

Takeshi had a sideways smile on his face as he walked toward him. "Yeah, Hayato. I'm sorry I couldn't hold them off longer."

Hayato touched his arm gently. "They're fine. Sakura-san has already got them on the mend."

Relief was painted all over Takeshi's face, but he said nothing. He waved them inside and the two men led them further into the homey interior, bumping shoulders silently. Naruto was staring at them intensely, a thoughtful frown on his face.

They strode through the makeshift corridors and Shikamaru vaguely wondered how the cave was even created, because it certainly wasn't nature. All thoughts of cave formations disappeared when he spotted familiar pink hair, bent over a makeshift sickbed. His traitorous heart was nearly beating out of his chest and he struggled to keep his mouth from splitting into a deliriously happy grin. Kakashi gave him that annoying knowing look again, one he could see clear through the man's mask and hitai-ate.

Naruto shouted, because he had no sense of decorum in what was clearly a medical setting. "Sakura-chan! We've come to rescue you!"

Alarmed, she looked in their direction, as did everyone in the general vicinity. Her patient, a dark-skinned boy with vivid blue hair, startled violently. She spoke to him in low tones and he settled as she straightened to stand, hands on her hips in a familiar scolding stance.

Sakura hissed at them, "Naruto! Keep your voice down! There are patients here who are trying to sleep."

He immediately wibbled at her, blue eyes wide and sad. "But Sakura-chan, we came all this way to save you and Hinata-chan and the others!" Shikamaru had finally noticed that there were other Konoha shinobi around them, all working with the children who had been placed on one side of the cavern or the townspeople, who were opposite them. He spotted Hinata in the very back, kneeling next to an elderly gentleman who was looking at her with a very fond expression. Next to him, Neji was paying no heed to Sakura and Naruto's argument, his eyes zeroing in on Hinata.

Sakura had just rolled her eyes at Naruto. "That's very nice of you all, thank you." She smiled softly at Kiba and Neji. "Hinata is fine, boys. Go see for yourself." She grabbed Neji's arm as Kiba went ahead to greet his teammate and stared him down sternly. "She did exceptionally well, both with the patients and the situation. Don't fuck it up, Hyuuga." She released him with a pleasant smile.

Neji confusedly continued on his way and Shikamaru could see Hinata's posture change as soon as she noticed his presence, becoming even stiffer and more proper the closer he was. Kiba saw this as well, but only sighed heavily and continued with his monologue of their adventure.

Naruto looked at Sakura, who was busy eying Neji critically. "What was that all about, Sakura-chan?"

Shikamaru answered for her. "Sakura has a new hobby and it's infecting all the people she knows."

Naruto was even more confused and Kakashi coughed to hide his laugh.

Sakura just stuck her tongue out at him and then grinned. "Whatever works, Shika-kun." She looked down at the little boy in the bed in front of her and smoothed the blanket over his thin shoulders. "I knew you'd get my message."

"It was nearly too subtle." Shikamaru was still resisting the urge to sweep her up and never let go, something she probably wouldn't appreciate while she was still with her patients. Days of anxiety over her safety were starting to catch up to him and the relief coursing through his veins made him feel weak. "We ended up running into your friend regardless." He nodded toward Takeshi who was smiling gently at a little girl of approximately six who seemed to be wearing more bandages than skin.

"Takeshi and Hayato are good men." She shrugged. "Good men who made bad choices. I can understand that."

Kakashi sounded slightly disapproving. "Sakura-chan, they kidnapped you."

"Kakashi-sensei, you know better than that. I allowed myself to be taken. Takeshi threatened the townspeople, yes, but he was desperate. Jinta was in especially bad condition." She smiled at the boy as he blinked his eyes open blearily and smiled back at her with no hesitation. "I've already made my peace with how it happened."

"So now what?"

Sakura shot a quick look at Takeshi and Hayato, who were still distracted by greeting their other children, seven all together. "I think we should take them all back to Konoha. I've been trying to get them to agree since I got here, but no dice."

Shikamaru thought that after knowing Sakura for years, he would stop being surprised by her. Clearly, he was wrong. "You have got to be kidding me, Sakura. Why would we even consider letting them into the village?"

She gave him a sour look. "Because all of these kids and Takeshi and Hayato are the result of Orochimaru's "failed" experiments, Shikamaru. Because Konoha owes everyone who has fallen into his hands once we let him go beyond our walls. Because they deserve better than a cave in the middle of the woods, if it's within my power to give it to them."

Kakashi broke in, speaking to her gently. "Is it, Sakura-chan? You don't have the authority to allow outsiders into our village."

She exchanged a look with Naruto, who simply nodded at her. "Tsunade-shishou will understand. She'll yell and throw things and maybe even punish me, but it will work out in the end."

"Yeah," Naruto agreed. "That old lady will strong-arm the Council into whatever she wants. She's done it before and this idea isn't even that weird."

"See? The hardest part will be convincing Takeshi that it's a good idea."

"What's a good idea?" They turned around, seeing that Takeshi's attention was now solely focused on them instead of the two toddlers climbing up on his lap and shoulders. He tried for an intimidating glare, but Shikamaru couldn't take him seriously when a blonde toddler poked at the tattoos on his face repeatedly.

Sakura gave him the same stern look she had thrown at Neji earlier. "You should come back to Konoha with us. Join the village."

"Absolutely not. We're fine here." Sakura pointedly looked at the cavern walls and the makeshift beds with a raised eyebrow. "We have everything we need." She looked at the borrowed medical supplies and then her chunin staff working between the townspeople and the children. "We don't need anyone's help!" Sakura just gestured to herself in silence.

"Takeshi." Hayato admonished him gently. "Maybe we should think about it."

"Why? So we can have an entire village to worry about attacking the kids? At least they can be protected here!"

Sakura jerked her head at Naruto, signaling something to him that Shikamaru couldn't interpret. "Look guys, Konoha's not perfect. I'm not gonna say that everything is going to be kitten farts and rainbows." Takeshi snorted and Hayato looked vaguely amused. "But there are a lot of good people there and we take care of our own."

"Right." Takeshi still looked skeptical. He pressed a kiss to the cheek of the same blonde toddler who was now valiantly fighting against sleep on his shoulder. Shikamaru was surprised by his actions; for such a prickly man, Takeshi was astonishingly open with his affection. "And what would we have to do to gain this so-called protection? I won't be anyone's prisoner again."

Naruto shrugged. "I can't speak for the old lady, but you'll probably be given the option of being active duty shinobi. I'm pretty sure they're gonna want to have one of the Yamanakas take a look at you, though."

Before they could ask, Sakura said, "He means that our mind specialists will have to ensure that your loyalty is not to anyone who would harm Konoha."

Hayato looked ill. "I don't like the idea of someone in my head, Sakura-san."

She smiled at him. "I understand, believe me." The three men shared a look, remembering her emotional battle with Ino during their first Chunin Exam. "But you have to weigh that against the potential gain for your children, Hayato. Are they worth it to you?"

He looked at Takeshi, who was soothingly rubbing the back of toddler who had finally succumbed to slumber and smiled. "You know they are."

Sakura clapped her hands together. "Good! It's settled. You'll come with us after Hayato moves the townspeople back home! Jinta is nearly back to perfect health, after all."

Takeshi's head shot up at her words and he hissed, "What? When did I agree to this? Hayato, you can't just-"

Shikamaru yawned and rubbed the back of his head, his anxiety finally starting to drain out of him the longer he could just see Sakura. "Man, just go with it. No one can resist the combined persuasive force of Sakura and Naruto."

The man grimaced and looked at the ceiling, muttering to himself. Kakashi squatted next to him, and smiled through his mask, patting his shoulder. "Welcome to the family."

Chapter Text

Tsunade squinted at the motley group of men and children assembled in front of her and then looked at her apprentice. "Who did you say they were?"

Sakura braced herself. "Survivors of Orochimaru." She had thought long and hard about how to introduce Takeshi, Hayato and their children. She didn't want to belittle their suffering or condescend to them, so she decided on using as few words as possible to describe their family. "They're seeking asylum in Konoha, on my recommendation."

Naruto chimed in almost as soon as she finished speaking. "And mine."

Tsunade just gave Sakura a thousand yard stare and she struggled not to fidget under her mentor's gaze. The dark-haired little girl in Takeshi's arms was sniffling in the oppressive silence. His impassive face was at odds with the careful way he cradled her against his shoulder. Tsunade finally sighed and opened up her desk drawer. The newcomers tensed, but she just pulled out sake and drank it straight from the bottle. "Sakura, you are going to be the death of me. You and your idiot teammate."

Sakura grinned, knowing she had won the battle. All without having to dodge a single projectile! Miracles did happen after all. "I'm sure you'll outlive us all, shishou."

Tsunade snorted and looked at the two men who were still standing frozen against the far wall. "Well? We have to get all the official crap out of the way before I can give you your hitai-ates. I assume you're competent enough to be tested?"

Takeshi huffed, offended. "We do all right for ourselves."

"He speaks! I can see Sakura has managed to find herself another prickly bastard to adopt." Sakura frowned while Naruto snickered at her misfortune. Kakashi had the grace to at least muffle his laughter with a cough. Tsunade looked at her apprentice questioningly. "Did you even think about where your new puppies are going to live?"

She shrugged. "I'm going to strong-arm that other prickly bastard out of some space at his compound. It will do him good to have company around."

Shikamaru saw Naruto shoot her an indecipherable look which she returned with one of her own and the blonde settled back on his heels, satisfied.

Shikamaru had made the mistake of mentioning what he had seen the day before they had been assigned to the retrieval mission and she had squeezed every detail out of his poor beleaguered brain. Why she wanted to know what the breeze was like and how Sasuke's face looked when they got caught was not something he wanted to contemplate. He had been so relieved to see her that he would have told her anything at all to make her happy.

Shikamaru wanted to touch her, just to establish that she was solid and present and here, but he maintained his distance. If he got too close, he would forget where he was and pull her into his arms and that would be embarrassing for everyone.

So it was a struggle for him not to react when she hooked her arm through his and dragged him over to speak with Takeshi. Hayato took the lead in doing the paperwork with Tsunade to start with their integration into the village. Shikamaru didn't protest the way Sakura man-handled him over to her new friends, though he did frown when Takeshi grinned at him mockingly.

"All tied up with her, aren't you?" Before he could retort, Sakura bopped Takeshi on the head, careful of the child still in his arms. "Ah! What the hell?"

She waved a finger in his face. "None of that, you. Use some other time to tease Shikamaru for his excellent taste in women."

Takeshi made a sound of disbelief. "You're unbelievable." He looked at Shikamaru with pity. "My condolences, man."

He shrugged, not at all concerned. "Somehow, I'll manage."

Sakura muttered under her breath, "Men!" She then turned away from them and smiled at the children who had been waiting very patiently during the bewildering meeting. "Are you guys ready to see your new house?" The kids all smiled back at her, having already been charmed by her gentle teasing and careful bedside manner while they were sick.

Takeshi squinted at her. "We can't afford a house, Sakura-san. Once we start taking missions, it will be easier, but …"

She waved her hand. "Pft. And where are your kids going to stay until then? You're just lucky that I know someone who has ownership of many empty houses."

Shikamaru could physically feel her plotting. It was getting to be a sixth sense, something he dreaded and loved about her. "You're not really going to ask the Uchiha, are you?"

Sakura's eyes sparkled. "Ask? Of course not."

She pushed open the heavy doors with little effort and waved her hands around with a flourish. "Welcome to the Uchiha Compound!"

Shikamaru blinked. The trees and the grass actually looked maintained and the houses, while aged, were still presentable. This area had been sealed off for so many years, he had expected to see everything in disrepair. "He's been busy."

Sakura shrugged. "I suggested he find a hobby. Apparently he's picked carpentry and landscaping." Shikamaru struggled to reconcile this image with the Uchiha Sasuke he knew and found it incomprehensible.

She didn't move them further into the compound and Takeshi was starting to get anxious being in the open with no information. "What are you waiting for?"

"Sakura, what the hell." Sasuke had appeared before them as if out of thin air, the seals on his chakra clearly having no effect on his speed. He glared daggers at the strangers and the younger children huddled close to Takeshi and Jinta.

"Sasuke-kun! Nice to see you too. Glad you missed me ever so much while I was gone." She stared at him challengingly. To Shikamaru's surprise, he just sighed and his posture eased minutely.

"Hello, Sakura. How are you? I'm glad you're home." Sasuke recited the words in an insincere monotone. "What the hell are you doing here?"

She nodded, strangely satisfied with his compliance to social niceties. "We have some new arrivals in Konoha. A family who have, until recently, been guests of our favorite Sannin." Sasuke's face twitched at the mention, but he said nothing, waiting for her to continue. "I just knew you would want to be the first to offer them sanctuary."

Takeshi was staring between the two of them, not understanding the conversational dynamic. "Uh, what's going on, Sakura-san?"

She patted his arm distractedly, not taking her eyes off Sasuke. "Nothing to worry about, Takeshi. My friend here is the one I mentioned earlier. Lots of space for the kids." Sasuke's face twitched again at her emphasis and then he nodded once.

Sakura grinned triumphantly and he huffed in irritation, turning on his heel. Over his shoulder he said, "There's a suitable house at the end of the main path. I will take you there." He walked off without glancing back to see if they would follow, arrogant as always.

Sakura just rolled her eyes and scooped up the blonde toddler, placing her bundle into Shikamaru's surprised arms. The child stared at him unnervingly while he attempted to figure out how to hold it without making a fool of himself.

Sakura just laughed at Shikamaru's panicked efforts and lifted a boy with shockingly white curly hair into a piggyback, to his great delight. He threw his arms around her neck and held on, beaming. "Not too tight, Toshio. I need to breathe, you know."

She took off after Sasuke and the rest of the kids followed her like ducklings, Jinta with his sister on his back and the twins racing alongside. Takeshi and Shikamaru were both left standing there with small children in their arms.

Takeshi shifted the little girl onto his hip. "What just happened? Did she just win us a house with a staring contest?"

Unable to compress Sakura's weird and uncomfortable team history into a single conversational topic, Shikamaru just went with it. "Basically."

Takeshi sighed and then started after Sakura and his wayward children. "Your girlfriend is scary."

Shikamaru looked down at the child in his arms, who had not uttered a sound and grimaced. "You have no idea."

They caught up to the group quickly and Shikamaru nudged Sakura with his shoulder. "Why this?" He raised his arms slightly, indicating the toddler who had nestled into his flak vest comfortably.

"You didn't expect Jun to just walk there alone, did you?"

"No, but I imagine Toshio could have." The boy on her back stuck his tongue out at him.

Sakura grinned at him mischievously. "Think of it as practice, darling." She laughed and walked ahead to speak to Sasuke while Shikamaru was left choking on his own spit.

Takeshi eyed him with pity for the second time that day, but didn't say anything. Instead he stared at Jun, who was strangely content to stay attached to Shikamaru for the walk. "Jun has never taken to strangers well, you know. He seems to like you."

Shikamaru looked down at the mess of blonde hair. "Ah, so Jun is a boy."

Takeshi shrugged. "Maybe."

"What? How do you not know?"

"Jun can be whatever he wants, but until he decides to speak, that's what Hayato and I are going with."

Shikamaru felt entirely out of his depth. He looked longingly at Sakura's back, wishing she would rescue him from the conversation instead of playfully antagonizing her former teammate. "Decides to speak?"

Takeshi's tone was falsely casual. "Jun hasn't really made a sound since we've met. I don't know what happened to him while he was in Orochimaru's … care." Shikamaru could see that Sasuke had heard the name by the way his shoulders tensed, though he continued to speak to Sakura as if nothing was out of the ordinary.

Jun let out a puff of breath against his vest and played with the pockets with a single-minded intent of retrieving the contents. "Joke's on you, kid. I don't keep anything in there." Jun ignored him and continued with his exploration.

They finally came to a stop in front of a large traditional house, where Sakura was attempting to place her hands on Sasuke's face, much to his obvious consternation. Shikamaru caught the tail end of their conversation. "-away for weeks! I just want to check, Sasuke-kun!"

"I have an appointment tomorrow. Stop."

She batted away his protests and placed her glowing hands on his temples, assessing him. Shikamaru could feel his stomach clench at the ease with which she touched the Uchiha. He kept his thoughts to himself, though he saw Takeshi give him a curious look before focusing his attention on the house.

"This is huge. Are you sure it's okay we stay here?" He shifted the girl in his arms and she craned her neck to stare up at the house with big eyes.

Sakura spoke for Sasuke after she stepped away from him, satisfied with his current condition. "Of course it is. There are nine of you, after all." She smiled at the children surrounding them and Toshio nearly glowed with happiness. Shikamaru rolled his eyes. Of course the kid has a huge crush on her. "And once you're settled, you can decide whether or not you want to them to attend to the Academy."

Sasuke gave her an unreadable look. "As former guests of that man, I'd be surprised if any of them didn't become shinobi."

Sakura's expression was not one Shikamaru had ever seen on her face. Was it bitterness that tinged her grim smile? "That is entirely up to the kids and their parents, Sasuke-kun. Not everyone has to be what we are, no matter their given talents."

He didn't reply, choosing instead to unlock the door to the house. Sakura rolled her eyes and stomped up the front steps, with the rest of them following suit.

Sasuke stood awkwardly in the middle of the large front room. "This is it. The bedrooms are through that door. Kitchen in there."

Takeshi smiled, an action that transformed his face into something ruggedly handsome. "Thank you, uh, Sasuke-san?" He looked at Sakura reproachfully. "Sakura-san didn't actually introduce us."

Sasuke snorted in what could have been amusement. "She's spent too much time with that idiot. Propelling herself into everything head first."

Sakura just sighed, accepting the insults as her due. "Yes, yes. Uchiha Sasuke, this is Takeshi." She then pointed to the children and named them off in rapid succession, "And these are his children. Junta and Toshio are the oldest." The white-haired boy smiled as she said his name; Shikamaru didn't think he had ever seen a different expression on the his face when Sakura was around.

She then pointed to the red-haired girl and the two pale, dark-haired twin boys. "Chie, Keigo and Akira. Shikamaru is holding Jun and Takeshi has Rinko. His partner Hayato is still with Tsunade-shishou, dealing with all the horrible paperwork that comes with moving to a hidden village."

Jun had turned around in Shikamaru's arms and was staring directly at Sasuke with an unhappy look on his face. He felt himself begin to like the kid despite himself.

Sasuke's voice was just as flat as his expression. "Pleasure to meet you." He raised an eyebrow at Sakura. "May I go now?"

She huffed, but grinned at him teasingly. "Go and be a hermit. I'll tell Naruto where to find you." Sasuke's mouth formed a thin line and to Shikamaru's utter astonishment, there was a hint of a blush on his high cheekbones. He was nearly out of the house when Sakura called after him cheerfully, "Don't think I won't ask tomorrow, Sasuke-kun!"

He shuddered and left, nearly slamming the door in his hurry. Jun shifted in Shikamaru's arms now that Sasuke was out of the room, choosing to reach up and play with the stud in his left ear. He looked at his girlfriend balefully. "You are way too invested in their relationship, Sakura."

She shrugged. "I just want my boys to be happy. The details are a bonus." Sakura winked at him lasciviously and then turned to Takeshi, who had placed Rinko on a nearby futon to nap. "You can stay here and get acquainted with the house, Shikamaru and I will do some grocery shopping for you guys."

Takeshi frowned and immediately protested. "You don't have to do that, Sakura-san. Hayato and I will figure it out ourselves."

"I'm the one who dragged you all the way to Konoha, it's the least I can do."

The man stared at her, wide-eyed. "The least? We have a house. I can't even remember the last time I slept in one." He rubbed his faced tiredly.

She patted his shoulder gently. "Well, get used to it. Naruto and I did promise, after all. And he really, really hates breaking promises."

Shikamaru muttered to himself, "That's an understatement." He tried to put Jun down on the same futon as Rinko, but the toddler was having none of it. He struggled to carefully detach the determined boy from his vest, not noticing Takeshi and Sakura watching in amusement. He looked up to see them staring at him and frowned. "A little help would be appreciated."

Takeshi put his arms out to aid him, but Sakura waved him off. "We could take Jun grocery shopping, if you trust us with him. It wouldn't be any trouble." Shikamaru thought it would be plenty of trouble, but said nothing.

The man grinned at him. "I've never seen Jun so attached to anyone. Quite literally."

Sakura dragged him out the door, toddler still in tow. "Great! We'll let Hayato and Naruto know where you're staying, okay? Be back in no time!" She waved at the kids and they were nearly outside the compound before he knew it.

"You know, I was looking forward to finally getting you alone." Jun had continued his fascination with Shikamaru's earrings. "But not quite like this."

Sakura had stopped him with a hand on his arm and leaned up to quickly kiss him, giggling when Jun huffed at her. "Let's just avoid Yoshino-san seeing us with Jun, huh?"

Shikamaru felt queasy. "Don't even say such things. We're already half-way married in her mind."

Sakura just ran her fingers through her short hair and laughed while they made their way back to the Hokage Tower. "What's marriage but a piece of paper? I don't need that."

He tried not to sound surprised when he said, "That's a big change from when we were kids."

She waggled a finger at him. "Ah, but when we were kids, I wanted to marry Sasuke-kun. Clearly I was wrong about many things." She hummed thoughtfully. "You know, Konoha laws on marriage aren't particularly specific, considering. They could do it if they wanted to."

Shikamaru felt like he was missing a piece of the conversation. "What?"

"Takeshi and Hayato. Or Naruto and Sasuke-kun, when they're ready."

He was disgruntled, but wasn't quite sure why. "So it's okay for them to get married, but not you?"

She glanced at him in astonishment. "Well, yeah. Kids change the whole game plan. You need to make legal arrangements for them, just in case. Our jobs aren't exactly safe."

"Naruto and Sasuke don't have kids, Sakura."

"They could if they wanted. You know it's still Sasuke-kun's goal. I have been doing some research on Naruto's sexy no jutsu and I think-" she opened the door to Tsunade's office and nearly ran into the subject of their conversation. "Whoa! Sorry." She peered around him to see Hayato bowing to Tsunade and Shizune, a happy smile on his face. "All done?"

Naruto grinned at her. "Yup! They are officially Konoha shinobi now. Hayato has their hitai-ate. Kakashi-sensei is in charge of testing them later this week to determine their ranks."

Sakura smiled happily. "I'm so glad everything worked out!" She hugged Hayato when he wandered over to join them. "Welcome to Konoha!"

"Thank you, Sakura-san." He eyed Shikamaru curiously. "Why is Jun with you?"

She smirked. "Seems like Shikamaru has a new admirer." Naruto snorted and clasped his hands behind his head, looking highly amused.

Shikamaru ignored them all. "Sakura and I are just here to tell you where you can find Takeshi and the rest of your brood."

Naruto glanced at his teammate. "Did you-?"

She was still smirking. "You know I did."

He laughed loudly and pulled her into a fierce hug. "You're the best, Sakura-chan."

She returned his hug with a bone-grinding fervor. "Yep."

Hayato just looked bewildered. "Where are my children, exactly?"

Naruto just grabbed his arm and tugged him out of the office. "Come on, I'll show you." He waved good-bye to Sakura and Shikamaru.

Sakura just called out to a still confused Hayato, "We'll bring Jun back home soon, don't worry!"

She smiled at Shikamaru, who had long resigned himself to her eccentricities. "Ready?"

Sakura and Shikamaru walked together in companionable silence after they left Takeshi and Hayato's new home, having dropped off both Jun and the food. Thankfully, the toddler had fallen asleep on their way back from the marketplace, so it was much easier to separate him from his person the second time around.

Shikamaru had slid his arm around her shoulders almost immediately after leaving and just pulled her closer when she laughed. "What's so funny?"

"I can't believe I went on a quarantine mission and came back with an entire family."

By habit, they had found themselves in the Nara Forest again and settled by their usual tree to look at the sunset and then the stars starting to shine in the night sky. Shikamaru pulled her back up against his chest and held her close, like he had the very first time they had met out here. "Uchiha was right, you know. You're picking up Naruto's bad habits."

She made an amused sound and leaned into him happily. "Dear diary, today Shikamaru and Sasuke-kun agreed on something …"

He tugged on her hair playfully. "Troublesome woman. Do you know how worried we were? And there you were, playing drill sergeant to bunch of missing-nin."

Sakura tipped her head back and kissed the underside of his chin. "I'm sorry you were worried. But I'm not sorry for what I did."

He sighed and just pulled her closer to him. "I know. You wouldn't be Sakuraif you didn't care too much about everyone." They sat in silence for several long moments, looking at the stars. He finally allowed all the anxiety and questions and worry to buzz through his system now that she was in his arms again. Now seemed to be a good time. "Move in with me."

"Uh, what?"

He buried his face in her hair and mumbled it again. "Move in with me. I want to be able to see you every day after you get home from the hospital or missions or whatever crazy shenanigans you and Naruto get into."

Sakura vibrated with laughter in his hold. "What is with you and saying this stuff to the back of my head?"

He didn't move. "Is that a no?"

She hummed thoughtfully. "Actually, yeah. It is a no." His arms stiffened around her as worry began to pool in the bottom of his stomach. Did she not want to have more than a casual relationship? Is that why she had brought up marriage earlier? She patted his knee patronizingly. "Calm down, I can almost hear the gears churning in that big brain of yours. You still live with your parents. Why don't you move in with me?"

Shikamaru's breath left him in a rush, moving wispy strands of her hair that tickled his nose. "You could have just said that. You're a cruel person, Sakura."

"Nonsense. That's part of my charm."

"Mmm, debatable. I still love you, regardless." She turned in his arms and smiled at him so genuinely that he felt his heart skip a beat. He leaned forward to capture her lips, slowly, reverently, no longer able to resist.

When Sakura had to pull back for lack of air, she whispered to him breathlessly, "Let's go home."

Chapter Text

Sakura felt around Sasuke's chakra pathways, pleased when she couldn't find a single issue in his optic nerves. She kept her hands on his temples and hummed happily. "Now that I've got you under my control, I think it's time we had a chat, Sasuke-kun!"

If possible, he stiffened even more under her hands. "I'd rather not."

Sakura laughed. "Oh, well, I'm the medic. I think I know what's best for you."

His face twitched into a slight smirk. "Somehow I don't think it applies in this situation. I decline."

Sakura removed one of her hands to poke him hard in the ribs, not losing her grasp on his pathways for a second. "Too bad. I'll get the information out of you one way or another. I'm pretty good at it."

He sighed slightly, blowing his bangs out of his face. "You should have gone to work for Ibiki instead of Tsunade."

She smirked. "Coming from you, I'll take that as a compliment." She moved away, disconnecting from his pathways and sat on the stool next to the exam table. She put an hand on his leg gently. "I just want to make sure you're happy. And Naruto too. He's my best friend."

"And me?"

She pursed her lips, looking thoughtful. "You're on probation, buddy. I have a spot open for another best friend, but the requirements are pretty harsh. I don't know if you'll be able to handle them."

Sakura could see that he was struggling not to roll his eyes. "You're ridiculous."

She nodded. "And nosy! Naruto was the one, huh? When you interrogated me about my sex life?"

Sasuke raised his eyebrow at her. "I did no such thing."

She spun in her stool a little and grinned at him. "Call it whatever you like, Sasuke-kun. We both know what it was." She shook a finger at him. "Don't evade my questions!"

He closed his eyes and muttered to himself, "Because you always answer me when I ask."

She slapped him on the chest with her palm and he crack an eye open to glare at her. "You ruined your chances at that when you kept pestering me about marrying you." Sakura's grin had a vicious edge. "Not still thinking of that are you, Sasuke-kun?"

"Not marrying you, in any case."

Sakura perked up. "Oh? But marriage still?" She tapped a finger on her chin thoughtfully. "Can I be the best maid of honor?"

"I'm certain that's not a real thing."

She flapped a hand at him. "Bah, what do you know about weddings? I've had Yoshino-san not-so-subtly throwing brochures at Shikamaru for weeks. I'm basically an expert."

He sat up suddenly and stared at her. "You're marrying the Nara so soon?"

Sakura was a bit shocked at his vehemence, but patted his leg in a patronizing manner. "I'm sure you'll beat me to the altar, Sasuke-kun. But we're not talking about me. Don't change the subject."

He sighed, this time a weary, full-bodied breath of air. "What am I to do about my clan? The idiot doesn't exactly have the right parts for the job."

Sakura tried not to show how much she was celebrating internally. He had finally, sort of, admitted his relationship directly! It was a step in the right direction for everyone involved. "We're not even nineteen yet, Sasuke-kun. Surely you can wait for children."

"A shinobi's life is not measured the same as a civilian's."

She snorted. "The only ones likely to be capable of killing either of you are each other." She drummed her fingernails against the table. "It's not like you to assume you would die early, Sasuke-kun. Where did all that arrogance go?"

"I'm not concerned about my own mortality."

Aw, that's almost cute, in a certain light. "Are you worried about Naruto? That's adorable." She went to pinch his cheeks, but he grabbed her wrist before she could make it and glared. "So rude, Sasuke-kun. I'm beginning to think you don't want the best friend job after all."

"Hn." He crossed his arms and leaned back against the table again, looking every inch the pretty statue. Sakura was just glad she always scheduled him as her last appointment of the day. He was such a stubborn, pig-headed man.

"You know, I'm still waiting on that story. Shikamaru told me all about your illicit activities on the training ground." Sasuke closed his eyes and his cheekbones turned the slightest bit pink, much to Sakura's delight. "I never knew you were such an exhibitionist." Thoughtfully, she mused, "Though there was that outfit you used to wear with the rope and the open shirt? Makes a girl wonder …"

Sasuke growled at her, "You are the worst person I have ever met."

Sakura's eyes widened in mock hurt. "Wow, ouch. Right up there with Orochimaru, huh? Damn. I'm almost impressed with myself."

He eyed her with resignation. "You are never going to let this go, are you?"

She grinned at him cheerfully. "I learned more than just recklessness from Naruto, you know." His fingers clenched into a fist and then relaxed and she realized he was actually nervous. Sakura sighed heavily. "You don't have to tell me, Sasuke-kun. I promise I won't pester you about it if you really don't want me to know."

"I do." He looked at her and then glanced away quickly, face still flushed. "I don't have anyone else to talk to about … this. It was easier when I didn't get close to anyone at all."

She shrugged. "It's easier and harder at the same time. I think you've probably discovered that for yourself."

"It's disgusting when you get so smugly superior."

"You only think so because you're not the one doing it." She leaned forward on her elbows and looked at him imploringly. "I'm all ears."

Sasuke snorted. "I bet." After a moment of silence, he said, "He was the one who started it, you know."

"I never doubted that. He's always been the one chasing after you." Sakura patted his shoulder condescendingly. "And you've always been emotionally constipated."

"You keep that up, we will never get through this horrifying discussion."

She sighed. "Men. So touchy about even having feelings. So did he just blurt it all out to you?"

Sasuke shifted on the table. "No, the idiot just broke into my house and molested me while I was half-asleep."

Sakura burst out laughing, unable to contain her absolute joy at the image. "Oh, he didn't! I wish I could have seen that." She wiped tears from the corner of her eyes, still giggling. "Was this before or after our conversation?"

"Before." He finally looked her in the eyes. "It was what prompted it. He just mumbled something about families and waiting for the right person before he stuck his tongue down my throat."

She sighed. "That was probably my fault. I told him to talk to you about, you know, the whole proposal thing. I did not suggest that he man-handle you." Sakura grinned at him lasciviously, eyeing him in a predatory way. "Sounds like you didn't mind that part, though."

"He left my place with a broken nose."

She poked him in the ribs and he grunted. "And a big grin too, I bet. He always has the same look after sex."

He wrinkled his nose and managed to look elegant while doing so. Idly, Sakura railed at the unfairness of it all. "I don't even want to know how you know that."

She shrugged helplessly. "We all have needs, Sasuke-kun. Just because you choose to be a repressed jerk doesn't mean the rest of us have to."

His eyes went red momentarily. "You didn't …"

Sakura waved her hands in denial. "Calm yourself. I merely once introduced him to someone and they hit it off." She looked off into the distance, thinking. "You know, now that I think of it, she resembled you quite a bit. Funny, that."

"Something tells me your interest in this is more than just friendly."

She cleared her throat. "You're both attractive men. Can't a girl appreciate a good looking couple when she sees one?"

Sasuke stared at her in disbelief. "You have been spending too much time with Kakashi. His books have clearly rotted your mind."

"Pft, Kakashi-sensei's books are for children." Her grin returned, looking even sharper. "I have some very informative novels that you can borrow, if you'd like. Just because I want to make sure Naruto isn't getting the same shitty deal as Karin."

He grunted, but didn't reply. Sakura made a note to bring them in on his next appointment, knowing she'd be able to force them on him eventually. She was surprised at how easily he gave in to her demands and figured it was his way of making friends without appearing to want them.

"So about the clan thing …" She looked at him meaningfully. "I mean, you're just starting out with Naruto, even if you have known each other for years. Children are a big deal."

Sasuke interrupted her. "He loves kids, you know that." Sasuke's shoulders slumped uncharacteristically. "But it seems … unfair that I am the only one who gets to add to my bloodline."

She raised an eyebrow at him. Unfair? Who is this person and what did they do to Sasuke-kun? "What makes you think that it would happen that way?"

He grimaced. "Whatever happens, we will have to use a surrogate. Obviously we can't mix our own genes."

Sakura clapped her hands together triumphantly. "Hah! But what if you could? What if I were to tell you that your brilliant best friend has managed to find a way?"

"So I attained the best friend status already?"

"No, I'm clearly your best friend, based solely on the fact that no one else wants the job. You still have to work for the title. I'm very much in demand." She wagged a finger at him admonishingly. "Don't distract from my amazing announcement!"

He settled back, intrigued despite himself. "Have at it, best friend."

"Ugh, you're such a jerk. I'm not sorry I slapped you the first time you proposed."

Sasuke sighed. "Sakura."

She wiggled on her stool. "Fine. You're familiar with Naruto's sexy no jutsu, obviously." He nodded, a vaguely disturbed expression on his face. "Well, through various scientific methods-"

"You mean you used Naruto like a guinea pig."

She glared, but continued instead of admonishing him. "I've determined that everything changes and the eggs his ovaries produce are viable."

"While I am sure that's very interesting to you, it's not actually helpful. Not even his ridiculous chakra would allow him to henge for an entire pregnancy." He frowned. "It would disperse the first time he fell asleep."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Yes, obviously, Sasuke-kun. Thank you for pointing out the glaring flaws in my plan."

"So?"

She huffed at him. "So? I extract the eggs from him and fertilize them with your sperm, after which it will be implanted into a surrogate. You'll still have to use one, but the child she produces will be Uchiha and Uzumaki." She hummed. "Though it may be children, since this process tends to veer toward multiple births. Something about the implantation with chakra leads to split eggs. I'm still studying that."

"That sounds very clinical." His voice was flat, but she could see the beginning of a smile curving his lips. "Do you think it could work?"

"Please. I'm no genius like you or Shikamaru, but I am still damn good at my job."

"Would you be the surrogate?" Sakura sighed. She should have figured this would be his next question. Sasuke had no lasting attachments to any of the other women in the village. Dealing with a stranger who was carrying the next generation of his clan was going to be a nightmare for everyone involved. Still …

"Only if you want to wait ten years to have kids, Sasuke-kun."

He raised an eyebrow at her, a touch of surprise on his face. "Is this your way of saying no or are you actually willing?"

"Ten years, Sasuke-kun. Ask me then."

He smiled at her them, a full, happy smile that left her breathless for a moment. "I'll hold you to that, best friend."

She could only answer him with a bemused look, laughing at herself a little. I've given myself a decade reprieve from his ridiculous requests on my bodily autonomy. Sakura was successful at pinching his cheeks this time. "It's so hard to stay mad at you, Sasuke-kun. One of your only charms."

He managed to look blank and offended at the same time. "Only? And you used to think so highly of me."

She waved her hand. "Your pretty face will fade with time." She grinned at him and pointed to the seal on her forehead. "I've got a much longer springtime of youth to look forward to."

Sasuke's lips curled in a disgusted snarl. "You really need to stop picking up other people's speech patterns."

Sakura stood and stretched her arms over her head. "I might just do it more, now that I know it annoys you." She shuffled around the small exam room, picking up her notes and putting everything away in her Sasuke file. She was suddenly thrown by how incredibly content she was with her life. Things had fallen into place, despite the betrayals, lies and danger. She turned to smile at Sasuke. "So things are good with you and Naruto?"

He slid to the edge of the table and let his legs touch the floor, though he remained sitting. "As good as they ever get with him involved."

Sakura hid a grin, remembering very similar words she said to Shikamaru about Sasuke. "I'm happy for you, Sasuke-kun." The beginnings of that devastating smile were on his face and she felt something warm bloom in her chest at the sight. "Now then, if you could just do me the tiniest of tiny favors …"

Shikamaru was waiting outside the hospital for Sakura, enjoying the cool breeze that wafted through the summer air and was unprepared for an attack from behind.

"Shikamaru!" Sakura had attached herself to his back like a monkey, wrapping her arms around his neck like a vise.

In a strangled voice he said, "Sakura, can't … breathe." Her hold loosened and she stepped away, grinning at him when he spun around. Shikamaru considered pretending to be upset, but dismissed the thought. He still found it difficult to do anything but waver between deliriously happy and fondly exasperated when it came to her. Still, he looked at her dubiously and said, "Why are you so happy?"

Her eyes sparkled suspiciously, but she only hooked an arm through his and pulled him into a leisurely stroll. "Today was a good day."

"Oh? Did you manage to hook up two more unlikely people in the short time since I saw you this afternoon?" He had insisted on taking her out to lunch, still internally giddy from the night before. He was resolutely not thinking of his mother's reaction to her only son moving out of the Nara Clan home. That would ruin anyone's mood.

Sakura laughed. "I haven't started any new projects yet." Her eyes widened excitedly. "What's Choji-kun's love life look like these days?"

"Sakura …" Shikamaru warned, already half-way resigned to her meddling. Silently, he sent apologies to his best friend for his weakness against his own girlfriend. "I think Choji is fine. He's always moved at his own pace."

"Hmm, we'll see." With that, he knew that she was just letting it go for now. The topic would come up again at the worst time, probably just as he was about to eat something. She seemed to take a great deal of pleasure in making him choke on his food in surprise.

Still, he didn't pursue it either. He was fine with waiting for the other shoe to drop on his head. "How were the kids?"

Takeshi and Hayato had brought all the children into the hospital for a thorough official check up to add them to Konoha's system. Sakura had extracted the promise from them the day before as they were leaving the Uchiha Compound.

"Depends on which ones you mean." She grinned. "They were all well-behaved as usual, though the twins are going to be absolute monsters if they spend too much time around Naruto. He was encouraging every "ingenious" idea of theirs the entire way back to Konoha."

Shikamaru sighed, "I can't believe that idiot is going to be our Hokage some day."

Sakura elbowed him the ribs. "Don't call him that."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "The Uchiha does it all the time."

"It's pretty much an endearment coming from Sasuke-kun. I don't pretend to understand all the weird dynamics of their relationship."

"I don't believe that for a minute. You're too understanding of their oddities." She shrugged, not willing to argue the point. "So are the kids okay?" Shikamaru tried to ask casually, like he hadn't gotten attached to Sakura's weird little family she had brought home.

She wasn't even the slightest bit fooled. "Of course, Shika-kun. All of them are in perfect health, barring the strange and torturous experimentations Orochimaru subjected them to. I will be overseeing their mental health exams." Sakura frowned. "It's a lot for one person, but I've asked shishou to discharge some of my other duties so I can take them on. The kids seem to trust me enough."

"Toshio would go to the moon for you if you asked, Sakura. I've never seen a kid with a crush that bad." He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. "Except maybe you."

"Ugh, must you always remind me of my childhood mistakes? So mean to your poor, beleagured girlfriend!" Despite her words, Sakura smiled at him brightly. "I do have a favor to ask you, though."

He wondered what horrible thing she was about to spring on him. Warily, he said, "A favor?"

"I've been doing research on play therapy this afternoon between appointments. I want you to sit in on my sessions with Jun." She rushed through the rest of it, seeing his obvious objections. "Takeshi and Hayato have already agreed to it! They said Jun has gotten very attached to you already!"

"Sakura, you know I'm not qualified to do anything like that." Moreover, he was very uncomfortable with the idea of being responsible for someone's mental health, especially a toddler's.

Sakura patted his arm. "You wouldn't really be doing anything, just hanging out in the room as a reassurance." She grinned. "Like a big sarcastic teddy bear!"

If would help the little boy, Shikamaru didn't think he could bring himself to reject the idea outright, though he dearly wanted to. "I'll do what I can, though I have no idea why he's picked me of all people to take a liking to."

She shrugged. "I've always found great comfort in your presence, Shikamaru. Maybe Jun is like me."

He was flustered at her casual words, still unused to the emotional affection she easily threw around. Quickly, he decided a change in topic was needed. "Are we going out for dinner tonight?"

That damnable sparkle was back in her eyes and he was instantly wary. "Oh yes." Sakura practically purred the words. "We are certainly are!" Without another word, she led him toward the restaurant district with a distinct air of triumph.

"Sakura? Where are we going?" He wasn't quite dragging his heels, but they had already passed Yakiniku Q and the other three restaurants they frequented.

"Here!" They came to a stop in front of an unfamiliar open-air restaurant and she peered around curiously.

"What are you looking for?" Sakura's eyes brightened as she looked over his shoulder and waved. Shikamaru groaned when he saw Naruto and Sasuke waiting by the hostess stand, respectively looking ridiculously excited and slightly murderous. "You planned this, woman."

She sniffed. "Of course I did." Heedless of their location, she leaned up to kiss him senseless, her arms winding around his neck to pull them closer together. When she pulled back to smile at him, Shikamaru had quite forgotten why they were even there.

"Get ready for the first of many double dates, darling."

Oh, right. That.