Chapter Text
Sirius was angry with James. They were arguing over the logistics of becoming animagi to help Remus with his transformations, but that wasn't the reason she was yelling at him. she had run away from home last summer and went to live with James and his family. It was hard for Sirius to tell the others what had happened, and she thought James would help her tell Peter and Remus, but he had not even tried bringing it up.
She had never been the most trusting person; the Black family would not allow her to be anything close to trusting. That is why she ran away, leaving her poor brother Regulas alone. Sirius wished she did not have to, but Sirius's mother would have killed her if she had not run away or had her married off to some rich pureblood. Who only cared if she could give him an heir. She wanted no part of her family's plans for her.
When she had made it to Jame's parent's house, Sirius was so relieved.
"Sirius, is that you? Why are you here? "James had said he kept asking what happened to her, but Sirius just stood in the doorway. Sirius was just too tired to answer any of his questions or any of James's parent's questions when they found them in the kitchen, with James trying to get her to eat.
'Do not worry about dinner. You need to rest. James will take you upstairs now.' Mrs Potter had told Sirius, but Sirius did not hear a word she said because she was in a daze. James just smiled at her as he turned back to the plate of food before setting it down on the counter. James took Sirius to the spare bedroom across from his own and told her to just knock on his door if she needed anything.
Sirius was barely aware of James at all, but later that night, she woke up, could not see, and was unaware of where she was. She had screamed out, and James had rushed in to comfort her. Sirius did not know why he was there. She felt as though she had no control over her body. Nevertheless, Sirius could hear James's comforting words, and she eventually calmed down and went back to sleep.
It had taken over a week for Sirius to start talking. James and his parents had waited calmly, not wanting to worsen Sirius's condition.
It was a bit unsettling to see Sirius like this, but when she started talking, she could not stop.
"They all would have killed me if I stayed! ripped my body to shreds and filled me with fascist ideology or sent me off to be bred by some pompous jerk who would not care about me!" Sirius yelled before she collapsed into their arms, sobbing.
"Oh, Sirius! I cannot believe they would do that!" Mrs potter cried tears of her own.
"They never cared about me; I thought they did; why did I ever trust them!" Sirius cried, "I have to go back. I left Regulas, my baby brother; I cannot leave him!"
She got up to leave, but she did not have the strength. She got up, but her leg shook. Sirius' legs could not hold her, and she fell into James's arms, and Sirius cried, sobbing into James' shoulder.
For the rest of the summer, she was very quiet. James and his parents tried to get her out of her shell and not to hide herself away. Sirius was grateful for how patient James's family was. They did not make her talk or do anything she did not want to. Sirius thought James would continue to support her and help her tell Remus and Peter.
When Sirius and James found Remus and Peter on the Hogwarts express, Sirius was so glad to see them.
"REMUS!! PETER!! It is so good to see you guys, Merlin. I missed you guys!!!" Sirius cried, wrapping her arms around Remus's neck. Sirius had a crush on Remus. Seeing him gave Sirius a sense of safety that only he gave her. The whole train ride was like the summer had never happened, and the break was nice. Still, Sirius believed that as soon as they got to the Gryffindor common room, James would help her explain the summer events to the rest of the marauders, but they went right to the boy's rooms to sleep, leaving Sirius to head up to her room. Okay, Sirius thought maybe James would help me tell them tomorrow.
However, he did not, nor did he help her the next day or the next. It was now the end of September and, yet James had not brought up the summer at all. Sirius was hurt. She did not think she was strong enough to tell Remus and Peter on her own. So she was irritated, and now James and Sirius were fighting. Sirius wanted it to end. She did not care about what they were arguing. She did not want to fight James; James was her brother; his opinion of her was very important to her, as was Remus's, so she tried to end the argument as quickly as possible.
"FINE! FINE! I do not care. I do not care. You win. We can do it your way; it does not matter as long as we can help Remus. I am going for a walk," said Sirius; Sirius got up and put her stuff back in her room, grabbing her cloak.
The night air was cold on Sirius's skin; the sky spat on her face. She walked around the edges of the castle walls. The sky was grim as if on the precipice of a much larger storm. Why was James ignoring what had happened in the summer? James knew that she had trouble telling people what had happened, especially those she cared about.
Moreover, why had nobody noticed? She thought her parents would have told everyone that she had been disowned. Did Remus know what happened and choose to say nothing? Was he mad at Sirius for not telling him herself? No, Remus would always forgive her and understand why she would not have told him the truth. Remus was a great listener. That was one of the things she loved about him.
Sirius decided she would check on the mandrakes they were growing so they could harvest the leaves. She found the spot behind the castle where they were growing; Sirius could tell that in a couple weeks, they could probably try to start their transformations. After making sure, each plant was in good condition. she continued her walk around the castle. Unfortunately, the small drop of rain quickened.
Sirius came upon a small alcove, and Sirius decided to sit down and wait to see if the rain would slow. She stayed silent in her solitude. The stars, she hoped, were the only things keeping her company, although she couldn't see the stars. The rain was loud as it beat against the stone walls of the school. She did not hear him coming. It was pouring. It was as if the whole world was crying for the deed that was about to transpire.
Severus Snape came into the nook. He did not see her at first as he cursed the rain.
"out of all night, why does it have to start to rain!" Snape said
"Isn't it past your bedtime Snivilus ?" She said. Snape's head swivelled, looking down at her.
"Black", Snape sneered. "All alone?"
"like that matter, you are no threat to me," Sirius said, going for her wand. Sirius reached into her pocket to find nothing; Sirius did not have her wand; she was alone; she had no weapon to defend herself. She was fucked.