Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Light was in the task force building, currently scrolling through a computer. L was located next to him.

Light was scrolling through everything mindlessly, not even knowing what site he was on anymore.

"Does Light-kun like dogs?" Asked L out of nowhere.

"Hm."

Light looked at his screen to find that he was on a page full of pictures of puppies that were ready to be adopted.

"Yes, I do." Replied Light.

L just looked back at his screen, continuing to scroll through cases with a sweet in his mouth.

Light looked back at his own screen as well.

He decided it was time to start actually paying attention to his screen.

*******

After awhile, L decided to go to the bathroom. Light was now alone.

Light continued to do his work, but after a bit, he couldn't concentrate.

Ugh, I can't concentrate... What if all this never happened...? Wait! Why am I thinking this!? Light shook his head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. It didn't work. Maybe I shouldnt've used the notebook. Maybe I should've just never even came across it!

Thoughts like those continued to cross Light's mind, and an emotion welled up inside him.

I'm a monster, aren't I...?

That pushed Light off the edge. He started to sob. He didn't know how long it has been, but he was still sobbing. He couldn't stop. He knew he was a monster, and there were people out there who thought the same. He sobbed harder.

It was heartbreaking sight. Luckily no one else was there except Watari who was in the kitchen, and L who was in the bathroom.

He was all alone. In more ways than one.

His sobbing died down to just whimpers, and soon he heard footsteps.

Light quickly composed himself. Holding in the tears and wiping his eyes. His face hung low, hiding his red eyes.

L silently sat back down in his chair. He stayed silent for a few more moments.

"Light-kun seems off." L said, looking at Light who was looking down.

"What do you mean...?" Light's voice sounded slightly hoarse. L noticed.

"It appears to me that Light-kun has been crying. Why?" Asked L.

"Nothing." Replied Light.

"There is a 98% chance you've been crying. Tell me why." L said, his tone changing.

Light stayed silent.

"Why?" Asked L once again

"I said it was nothing." Light replied weakly.

L started to get annoyed.

"It is clear that you have been lying. I have evidence." L said.

"Try me." Light replied. It was risky, but he had no choice.

"Sure." Replied L, and in one swoop he grabbed Light's chin and faced it towards him.

Light's face was red and puffy. His eyes were shiny, and there were tiny tears at the edges of his eyes. L had an emotion well up inside him.

"Why are you crying? Did someone hurt you?" L asked, his tone unrecognizable.

"U-uhm... No..." Light replied, his face turning red of embarrassment.

"Then why is it you're crying?" Asked L, his tone turning back to normal. Sorta.

"I-I can't tell you." Replied Light. He couldn't let him know that he was feeling guilty, and he was Kira! That would be crazy.

L frowned.

"Why not?" Asked L.

"Because you just can't know." Light said, his tone turning firm.

L let go of his chin for a moment, before he decided to do one last thing before officially letting go.

L leaned in and kissed Light, his tongue entered Light's mouth. Light turned completely red.

After a bit, they finally parted.

"H-huh!?"

Chapter Text

The room grew quiet, a kind of awkwardness one couldn't even begin to describe filled the room.

Light parted his mouth a few times, trying to say something, but ultimately failing in the end.

L just sat there, staring intensely at the other. It made Light feel weird, self-conscious. He'd never admit that though.

Light sighed, finally deciding to say something.

“...why'd you do that?” He let out, his voice coming out way more meek than what he had wanted. He internally cringed at that.

“I… don't know,’ Replied L, his voice having returned to its normal monotonous self.

Light laughed, he actually laughed. Something he didn't expect he'd ever do in a situation like this.

“Don't you know everything?” Light asked jokingly, and he couldn't believe he did. He felt like something had changed inside him, and he didn't know what.

“I'm not a god.” L replied, and Light could almost laugh. They were really nothing alike… but so alike at the same time.

The room grew quiet again, no words or even any sounds being exchanged between the two. There was no need for any of that.

Watari soon walked into the room, and it didn't take much to get a feel for the atmosphere. He could practically feel it on his skin.

“Do you need anything, sir?”

After a few moments, L looked up at Watari.

“Cake.”

That was all that needed to be said—Watari understood.

“Yes sir,” He responded, bowing as he did so. He then left the room, his footsteps deathly quiet.

Light decided he just wanted to move on from this topic, and ignore everything. L seemed like he wanted to do so, he ordered cake after all.

Light faced the computer once again, a feeling at the pit of his stomach rather achingly distracting as he tried to work on a case that they had just gotten recently.

L continued to stare intensely at Light, to the point that if Light wasn't already unable to concentrate, he definitely was now.

Watari soon walked into the room, cake in hand, atop a plate that held a fork as well. He handed it to L, bowing afterward, and leaving the area.

“Hey, Light,” L said, trying to get Light's attention.

Light sighed, turning toward L after a few moments of contemplation.

“What is it-?”

Light’s words were cut off by the sudden invasion of a fork in his face. Light’s face contorted into one of confusion, not quite getting it.

“Have some cake,” L said lightly. Though his voice was monotonous, it held a certain something else that one couldn't pinpoint, especially since there wasn't much reference elsewhere.

Light was even more confused now. L never shared his cake, it was his alone. He didn't understand why L wanted to share now. Because of pity? That doesn't seem like something L would do just because he pities someone.

“I'm good, thanks…” Light replied, turning away from the fork shoved in his face.

“Cake can help you feel better.”

Light laughed in reply, “Does the genius have any evidence to support that?”

“Yes, I actually do. There are loads of reports on the effects of eating cake to induce a sort of calmness amidst any storms a person may feel. Of course, it can depend on the person, but—”

“Enough, enough, I don't care.” Light replied, “And why do you even know about that?”

“I really like cake.” L simply replied.

“Of course you do…”

Light sighed after a moment.

“Okay… give me the cake.” Light said, a sort of conformation in those words. A sort of surrender of personas, whatever walls built up momentarily crumbling.

L immediately shoved the fork back in Light's face, causing Light to jump back a little.

“I said to give me cake, not to try to kill me… and I can hold it myself.” Light said, reaching out his arm to grab the fork himself.

L grasped Light’s wrist, preventing him from grabbing the fork.

“I'll feed you,”

“What!?” Light yelled out in surprise. Never once in his life would he ever believe that L would offer such a thing.

Without realizing, Light’s cheeks began to redden. Whether embarrassed or flattered, it was hard to tell. Maybe both?

“Just eat.” L said, shoving the fork to Light’s lips this time. After a few moments, Light hesitantly opened his mouth. L followed suit by shoving the fork in Light’s mouth.

Moments passed, and L pulled the fork out of Light’s mouth, Light swallowing the remnants of the piece of cake.

“You can learn to be more gentle.” Lectured Light toward L, seeing as L practically could've killed him with how rough he put the fork in his mouth. Well, that was an exaggeration, but still.

“You wanna learn just how gentle I can be?” Replied L in a low voice, his response rather sudden and unexpected.

Light looked like all the red in the world conjoined into one being living on his face at this point. Light couldn't bring himself to say anything in reply.

After a bit, L just shoved the fork back in Light’s face.

“Have some more,”

Light just took another bite, chewing the piece of cake and eventually swallowing it. Light opened his mouth again after a few moments, this time for a different reason.

“...you kissed me…” Light said low and softly, seeming to question whether or not it even happened himself.

“Yes, I did.”

Light's breath hitched, his cheeks reddening, a kind of vulnerability that one would never expect from him.

“Did you…” Light trailed off, not finishing whatever question that he would've asked.

“Like it? If that's what you're asking, then I'd say that you aren't the best kisser, but otherwise I did enjoy it for every other reason.”

Light looked shocked at L’s words, his face turning even more red than before.

“Did you like it?” L returned the question.

Light remained quiet for a few moments, contemplating on the answer to that supposedly.

“I… I don't know… I can't say…” Said Light, confusion very apparent in his every being.

“Do you want me to kiss you again?”

Light looked up at L, answering after a moment.

“I think so, yeah…” He replied breathlessly, a hint of shame, quickly forgotten in the moment.

Their lips connected only a moment after his reply, this time more eager and passionate than previous. They only stopped to catch their breaths a minute or two later.

“Did that help you figure it out?” L asked Light, his tone rather teasing, in contrast to his usual demeanor.

“...I liked it.”

They sit in silence, feeling there is nothing else to say, just staring at each other with a look in their eyes that one wouldn't dare to comment on.