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Chapter Text

 The scratching of quill on paper and the clicking of the clock in the corner were the only sounds in the large room, despite the two girls sitting side by side at the front. The source of the scratching of quill was the curly-haired brunette, she had two large horns on either side of her forehead that looked as out of place as she did in the detention room. The toe-headed girl next to her, on the other hand, hadn’t even touched the scroll in front of her. Opting rather to sit and glare at her curly-haired counterpart. 

The two of them could not have been more different. Illustrated nicely in the difference of their uniforms. The curly-haired girl’s uniform was accented with a bold red and ostentatious gold, her skirt falling to a reasonable length, just beneath the knee. Unlike most of her classmates, who tended to roll or shorten their skirts. Whereas the toe-headed girl’s uniform was a rich green and silver and very obviously not a girl’s uniform. After all, this was her first time as a girl. Or rather, his first time. His name was Draco Malfoy.

That name had generated quite a bit of infamy in the past 5 years he’d been at Hogwarts. A Slytherin prefect with a reputation for being cruel and merciless. Second in his class, he was cunning and ambitious. His status as a pureblood legacy made him like a god amongst his fellow Slytherins. He was the poster child for the House of Slytherin. At least to the external world. 

 The curly-haired girl next to him also had quite the reputation but on the opposite side of the spectrum than his. Having befriended the Wizarding World’'s golden boy, Hermoine Granger had “saved” the school multiple times since their first year. She was the top of their class, a prefect and a genuinely talented witch. Talents that, in the opinion of most Slytherin purebloods, were wasted on a muggleborn (or “mudblood” as they’d call her). However despite her blood status, it was clear to everyone she was going places. 

Despite both of their reputations of being rule-following students, the fact that the two of them ended up in detention was no surprise to the headmaster, Professor Dumbledore. It was what happened leading up to them being in detention that did. In Granger’s own words, she’d “kinda sorta hit him with a sex transition hex.” 

In response, Malfoy had cast a horn-growing hex. Hence, the out-of-place horns. Due to the combination of both of their bad luck, Mr. Filch had just so happened to be passing by to witness the whole thing. As such, they both got detention and were tasked with writing a 500-word apology letter to one another. The room had been charmed to not allow them to leave until both were written and read. 

Hermione, who had worked on her letter since they got in there, had already finished. Although she had lots of pride, she understood when it needed to be put aside to do what needs to be done. Besides, being in detention was cutting into her valuable study time. 

Draco, on the other hand, appeared to not be able to put his pride aside. Appearances can be deceiving, however. 

You see, it isn’t all too uncommon for the people who seem the most prideful to have horrendous self-doubt. This was the case for Draco Malfoy. Even though his entire life he had been told he was perfect, he’d always felt wrong. He could never quite figure out why, so he shoved any thoughts that he knew wouldn’t be approved by his peers or parents deep down. Not acknowledging them or allowing them to surface in any way.

However in this moment, it wasn’t pride that was holding him back. Necessarily. He did feel that this was all ridiculous and he was perfectly within his rights. But there was something far more distracting. You see, for the first time in his entire life, he felt right . He knew that it shouldn’t have been the case. He was in the wrong body, right? Even still, when he looked down at his body in this moment. It felt like his. Even though it was female. 

After so many nights of staring in the mirror, criticising, hating, destroying his body. It finally felt perfect. At least as close to perfect as possible.

Hermoine, clearly annoyed at his inaction, turned to Malfoy and said, “Are you going to write your letter or not?” 

Malfoy brought back to the present, glared and snipped, “ Of course! Have some patience, will you?”

The Gryffindor, deciding to rub salt in a presumed wound, retorted, “Perhaps if you weren’t so busy admiring yourself, you’d already be done.”

If looks could kill, Hermione Granger would be dead ten times over with the daggers that came out of Malfoy’s eyes. Out of spite and not actually wanting to do it, Malfoy proceeded to begin to write “I’m sorry.” over and over. Two hundred and fifty times, to be exact.

The Slytherin sneered, “I’m not “admiring myself”, I’m disgusted by what you’ve done to me.”

Draco felt a pang in his gut. He knew it was a lie. The only reason he said it was because he knew it was what was expected of him.

Hermione took a moment to observe the boy. Then she rolled her eyes, “Right. ‘Cause disgust is amoursely looking at yourself.”

“Oh, fuck off!” Malfoy cried and threw the scroll right in her face.

The lack of effort on his part did not surprise her at all. Just as her complete 100% effort didn’t surprise him. She had written an entire essay, after all.

The two of them sat in silence as they read. Hermione ended up finishing reading after the 54th “I’m sorry”. She knew that would be enough to satisfy the charm. Draco only partially read, meaning that he read the words but didn’t process any of what was written. 

As much as he hated to admit it, the Gryffindor was right. He was distracted by his body. He wasn’t sure why it mattered so much to him. After all, a body is just a body. Right? Male or female, it can do the same basic things. But he just couldn’t seem to get over it. 

He hated the Gryffindor for being right. He wasn’t disgusted. He was delighted.

He was so wrapped up in his own thoughts he didn’t even notice that he was being closely observed. Something about his behaviour reminded her of a comment Luna had made. Luna had taught her the spell and had made an offhand comment about how when she first had it cast on her, it made her realize how wrong her body naturally was. That was how Hermione Granger learned what being transgender was. It was also how Luna Lovegood had come out to her. She later learned that she actually has a transgender uncle, who they were waiting until she was a little older to explain it.

Something in her urged her to reach out to him. However, that urge confused and slightly repulsed her. After all, it was Draco Malfoy. He had tormented her and her friends since their first year. Although another part of her reminded her of her own morals: help anyone who is in need. If anyone looked like they were in need, it was Draco Malfoy. The blonde’s eyebrows were knit together in a look of confusion and frustration. But despite the concerned expression, he looked so comfortable in his body. She was sure if it were Ron or Harry in his place, they’d exude discomfort. After much internal debate, Hermione finally decided. Her morals won.

“Malfoy?” She said, testing the waters. She wasn’t entirely sure what she was going to say, but she knew she had to do something. 

“Yes, Granger?” Although he had intended to sound intimidating, his voice as a female was more of a sickly sweet poison rather than the brash tone he was used to. 

Timidly, she asked, “Is there something you’d like to tell me? I mean, I know we aren’t friends. Really. Or at all. But I’m a good confidant, and I’d like to help.”

Draco panicked. Had she noticed? Did she know? How could she know? Is it that obvious he’s not a boy? Draco scolded himself for thinking the last thought, but it still rang true. His entire body knew it. His soul knew it. The essence of her being knew it.

Draco cleared his—her throat. She growled, not very convincingly, “Why would I have anything I’d like to tell you ?”

“Well, I just figured that-” Hermione took a breath and cleared her throat, “You might not have someone to open up to about stuff like this and-”

Malfoy spoke over her, “Why would I open up to you? Even if I did have something I wanted to tell someone, it wouldn’t be you.”  

Hermione flinched slightly. She wasn’t what she expected, but it wasn’t that. Honestly, she should have expected that.

Malfoy felt some pity for the other girl, whose eyes were wide. However, she had a reputation to uphold. She stood and slammed the letter on the table, she turned to look down at Hermione.

“How long will this last?” She cocked an eyebrow and gestured to herself.

Hermione didn’t actually know the exact amount of time. Her tone was uncharacteristically meek, “A few more hours.”

“Well,” Malfoy hissed, “I’m done reading. Don’t mention this again. Or we will have an issue, Mudblood.”

Malfoy’s tone was venomous. She practically spat the slur. She rarely used the slur. The people around her threw it around, though. So, most assumed she used it just as freely. Normally, she doesn’t mind. But guilt panged in her stomach for whatever reason. 

That didn’t matter. She turned and pushed the door open. Grateful, the charm had been appeased. She took one last glance at Hermione before walking out the door.

Hermione sat there for a moment. She contemplated what had just happened and recentered herself. She adjusted her sweater before she left the room as well.

Chapter Text

Despite Hogwart's large size, gossip travelled quickly. Meaning that when Malfoy entered her own common room, no one in the room was genuinely shocked. Some of the Slytherins attempted to hide their giggles, and quite a few of the bolder Slytherin boys smirked and catcalled. Malfoy just sent a glare in their direction. 

She made her way over to her two “friends”. Crabbe and Goyle weren’t really her friends per se; their parents worshipped her parents. And that trait was inherited by the two of them, meaning they practically grovelled at her feet. A trait that was equally useful and bothersome. As such, when she approached the two of them, they stood to greet her. As if receiving a queen.

Despite still grovelling, the past few months, they’d been more genuine. So Crabbe’s snide remark wasn’t too shocking, “Damn Malfoy, who knew you’d be so hot as a girl?”

Malfoy rolled her eyes and put on her expected face, “Everyone did. Obviously, I’m attractive or hot , regardless.”

She flipped her hair. Pansy, her on-and-off girlfriend, walked over a sly grin on her face. Pansy’s eyes had a dark look that even Malfoy couldn’t quite recognize. She draped herself over Goyle and sighed, “Careful, Draco. You keep being so attractive, and you’ll turn me into a lesbian .”

Her stomach dropped. Purebloods, especially of the variety that her family and the majority of her friend’s families, were known for being especially bigoted. Experiencing same-sex attraction, according to them, was bad. This funny feeling in her stomach wasn’t a new feeling. This distaste for homosexuality was something she just couldn’t quite wrap her mind around. Even before her current revelations. The way Pansy had annunciated that word conveyed the opinion of every other person in that room. At least to Malfoy’s knowledge, anyhow.

However Malfoy still had a part to play, so she smiled and laughed along with everyone else. She drawled dramatically, “I guess I’ll have to go hide in my room until it wears off then.”

Of course that caused another round of laughter as Malfoy turned and began to walk to the stairs that lead to the dorms. Deciding to continue the theatrics, she was the dramatic sort after all. Malfoy turned before disappearing down the stairs and bowed. Which caused a mess of whistles, shouts and applause. 

She turned and dashed down the stairs into her room and slammed the door behind her. She leaned on the door for a moment, and suddenly, all the emotions she had felt in the past 3 hours came crashing in on her. She jumped on her bed, allowing all of the positive emotions to wash over her. She could deal with the negative ones later.

She grabbed one of the multiple throw pillows and hugged it. The sensation of the pillow pressing against her chest was new and sent her into a fit of giggles. Everything just felt so right . As she lay in bed, staring at the constellations embroidered on the curtains of her bed, all she could think was, “Who knew that two sacks of flesh and nothing in between your legs could make a person so happy?”

She rolled out of her bed, hitting the floor with a dull thud, and crawled over to the ornate floor-length mirror propped against the stone wall. She sat down in front of it. Staring at the person in front of her, she was in awe of who she saw. For the first time in her life, she didn’t want to cover the damn mirror or look away when she caught her own reflection. Or scrutinize every little perceived imperfection. For the first time in her life, she saw herself in the mirror. 

Tears swelled in her eyes as she looked at herself. While she used to look exactly like her father, she was now a picture of her mother. Except for her long platinum blonde hair that fell in gentle waves to about mid-chest. She reached up and touched her hair; it was soft and nice. She pushed it all forward, smiling as it covered her eyes and face. Brushing it back again, she turned her attention to her chest. The thing about the spell was that despite its ability to change the recipient's height, it wasn’t able to change their natural mass. So she was quite plump, being a much healthier weight than her male counterpart. She unbuttoned her shirt to look at her breasts; they were small for her weight and round and perky.

Instinctually, she grabbed them. It is normal to want to explore your body, after all. As she let go and they bounced, she giggled, loving the sensation. She turned her attention to her face. Her jawline was softer. Her cheeks filled out more and had a healthy glow to them. Her neck was something that especially caught her eye, specifically the lack of an Adam's apple. Something she had always hated was that damn Adam's apple, and now her neck was smooth as she traced her fingers down her neck. Her eyes were relatively the same, if not as harsh as her male counterparts.

She stood up and turned to look at her butt. She admired it for a while; it was a really nice butt after all. She turned to admire her curves; her waist was pronounced, and the pudge on her stomach for once didn’t bother her. It amazed her how, in just a few seconds, her body had gone from completely flat to round and curvy. She noted how she was slightly more pear-shaped, a slight deviation from her mother’s perfect hourglass.

It felt as though she’d only been staring in the mirror for a few minutes, but it must have been hours. Too short of time, in her opinion. She genuinely wants to live in this body for the rest of her life. Her body began to tingle as if waves of electricity were racing through it. It wasn’t necessarily painful. Simply numbing. She watched herself as her body grew, her features sharpened. Her hair began to shorten, and she fit the uniform again.

For the majority of other people, this would’ve been a relief. Their dysphoria cured. That was not the case for Draco. Her dysphoria worsened. She looked at herself, now male, in the mirror and only felt dread and disappointment. She hated who she saw. She hated the body, the voice, the face! None of it was right! 

She finally understood why. 

She crawled back over to her bed and climbed on to it. Pressing her face, which was wrong, into her pillow and began to cry.

Chapter Text

Ok so this is an author's note more than anything. Um, so hi... So this was a project I was working on a while ago when I was under the pseudonym Crying, obvi I'm not working under that psued anymore. I also forgot what email/password I used for this fan fic for a while. Hence why I just now made this account(mischievous_fraise) a coauthor. Any who, um I'm going to rewrite this again. Again. UM so yea. I don't have any coherent thoughts right now but I'm going to try and make schedule and stick to it. I just really like trans Draco, he/she is precious to me. I'll also probably explore Draco being a trans boy because fuck you JK Rowling. I do what I want with my favorite slytherin boy. I'm bad at writing like this. Um bye? Yea I have nothing else to say so bye.