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Chapter Text

Celestina Milano was sure that she has accumulated enough good karma when she was a student. She is just an ordinary person, whose parents were just lucky to have their business flourish to get her through college and supported her until finishing law school. She is also just a lucky person who was able to pass the bar exam- well she has the right to at least brag though not much of a feat compared to some but still. She is a very, very lucky person who graduated with the highest honor in the batch, who also earned a prestigious scholarship to take up a Master’s degree, and who got an employment offer. She honestly have no idea how that happened.

On her sixth year of working in the Italy's top law firm, she should have known better than to dismiss the doubt at the back of her head when her colleagues, both the partners and associates, were amicably welcoming her on a very uneventful day. They have prepared coffee, placed flowers on desk (and with that amount it was as if they were offering it to her for her funeral), gave a generous offer of chocolates and candies, various gifts from the senior partners, and was even informed by her secretary about a scheduled one month vacation anywhere and anytime care of one of the partners. Even her superior who had been giving you a rough time had been friendly and generous. She should have known better though. She shouldn't have accepted the thick file of envelope delivered from the higher-ups, personally handed by her grumpy superior. When he said that she was estopped when she opened the package, she knew that she should have returned it to him.

Her associate, one older by a few years and who has been working in the law firm a year longer than her was giving signs not to open it and give it back when she arrived. Of course, Celestina ignored her associate, Atty. Aira Richards. So when Celestina opened the envelope, she realized that this was one of the clients handled by the legend of the law firm, the late Atty. Federico Gianni, it was really too late to say no. Said deceased (her mentor who had trained her personally until a few months ago when he died of an unknown disease) handles most of the clients with... ah (illicit, illegal, unlawful, felonious, contrary) interesting (would be a proper word) businesses. Yes, Celestina thought, that finally getting hired and be trained by Italy's best lawyers was when her luck had finally ran out. Celestina Milano just wanted to be a decent human being but it seemed that the world has other plans for her. And now, she is inevitably involved with the mafia.

So when her secretary was briefing her on her schedule for tomorrow, a meeting with the Vongola Family, she just couldn't help but laugh in amazement. The amazement that one feels that everything is just disturbingly absurd and unacceptable and unfair that one had nothing to do but laugh. As it is, she might as well spend the last day of her normal, peaceful, and secure life with how she liked it regardless whether it was just 10:00am, and the day was not even nearing its half. She got up and addressed the people in the room, giving them the best uncertain smile she could give them. "Let's call it a day shall we? Tomorrow starts our worst nightmare so if I were you, I'll go get the strongest alcohol you can get" With that she left the office with a wandering heart.

She thought that when she got home to her apartment, she will have a time to reflect on what will happen to her life. Turns out today is the start of her nightmare. There were people moving her things, without consent or even prior notice. She had a good hunch on what is happening, but it is not right to assume. There are a lot of violation happening at this instant and there are a lot of causes of actions she can raise against whoever ordered this but that is not really a nice way to make a good impression on your client (almost client). So when one of the movers approached her, telling her of the new address and the new car waiting for her outside, registered under her name and already fully paid, the first thing she was able to say, "Hey, why are you moving my things?" It was only now that Celestina noticed that the person talking to her was not one of the movers but someone who may be their boss or their head.

The point is he looks someone with some authority. "Ah we were just making sure your things are disposed of since they do not fit the walls of your new apartment. Of course, this apartment remains to be yours, the Vongola just wanted you to live more comfortably." He smiled at her but somehow there is something dangerous about him. Like one of those feeling she gets when her client is really a guilty party. “I hope you don't mind but we have hired people to rearrange your new apartment. We have your important documents transferred too, and rest assured that we have not looked into them." She was gaping at him in disbelief, unsure of where to start protesting. "Oh and I hope you don't mind but we have..." He trailed off, at least having the decency to look away shyly. "Ah made a wardrobe makeover for you. Reborn-san said that Vongola's lawyer should only have the best. Shall we go to your new home?"

"Ah..." Celestina simply stared at him. She wanted to tell him that those things they disposed of, were pretty much her investment; yes she minded it, and no she doesn’t have a choice so might as well go home wherever that is.

When she arrived at her new “home,” she wasn’t really expecting to have a new house handed to her. She was really contented with a space of her own, plus her previous apartment was near the law firm. The new one given to her was more of a villa than a house! Vicente, the guy sent by the Vongola to arrange the things as per instruction of the Boss’ right-hand man, gave her a tour in the two story house. The ground floor consisted of the living room, the dining area with a fantastic view of the pool and the garden, the kitchen, and a bathroom. The second floor mainly contained three very spacious bedrooms with bathrooms.

Celestina was rethinking her life choices when the staff left her. Her boss and partner of the law firm, Atty. Campella, called and actually gave her the time off. He had also taken the liberty of taking half of her arbitration cases (one Celestina is actually passionate about), and distributed all her criminal cases to the other lawyers in the firm.

“Wait, how about Mr. D’Angelo’s case? I am close to a lead, and I can plea on his-”

“Celestina, love, from today onwards your expertise should be dedicated solely to the Vongola, and when needed to their allied-” She noticed that slip from her boss’ train of thoughts. Who are they kidding really? Only ordinary people who are not watching the news, and really naïve people are the ones who still believe that Vongola is a family who owns a lot of corporations and the like. Considering that said family was not part of the Maxi Trials back then (much to her awe), then perhaps it is really not that surprising. “Sister companies when needed. Your services will be needed 24/7 by them. A few years ago, the reins were handed down to a young man, perhaps in your age group. I’m sure you will get along just fine like how Rico and Timoteo became best friends.”

“Right, of course, sir. May I ask why give it to a mere associate of your law firm rather than assigning this very important job to a partner?” Or you know, actually taking it yourself? Celestina restrained the word vomit, because if the Vongola or any of their enemies won’t kill her, then her boss who seemed to be in a first name basis with the previous CEO-slash-boss of the Vongola will.

A laugh was heard from the other side of the line. “Rico did say that you doubt yourself despite that self-confidence you display before litigation proceedings.” He cleared his throat to make him prevent his grief from resurfacing for losing not only a valuable partner in the law firm but a very good friend. “You were trained by the best Arbitrator and Litigator in the country. The Vongola wouldn’t choose you if he did not recommend you to them, and even if he did not, he had the foresight of telling me to give our important clients he handled to you.” Campella’s voice suddenly became warm. “For a man who is very hard to please, he was very proud of his prodigy.”

Celestina’s mind was chanting skepticism inside her head, ‘don’t fall for it, don’t fall for it, don’t fall for it, don’t fall for it.’ “Thank you, sir for the trust. I do hope I can at least be able to fulfill such duty.” Damnit, I fell for it! There was honesty in Campella’s voice, but she really didn’t want to be involved in such a messy and dangerous job. And yet learning of her mentor’s confidence to her, even going as far as letting her “inherit” his clients overwhelmed her.

Her warm cheeks, and the pleasant fast beating of her heart wasn’t helping with her trying to turn down the client. She felt like jumping in joy, and she honestly doesn’t want to think about rejecting it any longer.

“You will.” Her boss assured her before he hang up the phone.

Celestina made a choice to honor the dead’s wishes, and hope that whatever questionable decision she had made would not involve her family. Honestly, who in the right mind would choose a dead person’s honor over safety?

At twenty-nine years old, Celestina felt as if she was in a midlife crisis.

When her mother called that night through a video call, she couldn’t help but notice the absence of her father. He went out of town for his consultant job, her kind mother informed her with melancholy. Celestina told her mother of her mentor’s work being passed to her. The lawyer was glad that her mother’s smile finally reached her eyes.

“I have faith in you, Tina.” Her mother would have gladly hugged her if they are not miles apart.

Celestina only thanked her mother’s support. When she was a teen, she never imagined those words coming from her mother, considering that both of them misunderstood each other until her mother’s words would silence her. She would wish that she received spanking as a punishment after the words has been processed in her mind.

“If your uncles and aunts would hear this, they would die of envy.” Something must have happened again with her mother’s shaky relationship with her siblings, but that’s not really new. It made her wonder why they bother attending family reunions- she loathed it as a child.

They talked about her mother’s new hobby, and the gifts she had received from her father. Celestina kept a polite smile, eyes not really seeing her mother’s face at the moment when she saw the dazzling bracelet her mother seemed to treasure.

She remembered the first time her father had sent things for her mother- bouquets, designer bags and clothes. Her father wouldn’t want anyone near his cellular phone if he’s not using it. Of course, Celestina would challenge that rule. The opportunity presented itself and she took it like how she swiftly browsed through her father’s inbox and call history. She couldn’t remember the name as she deleted the number from his device and returned the phone back to its original position. When her father returned, she was finished with her homework. She was sweating as her heart raced that she has to go out and walk their dog in the neighborhood.

Her mother moved to the topic of Celestina and dating. “Mama, I am good with babies and children until they throw a tantrum.” There’s a knowing glint in her mother’s eyes, and the lawyer felt like she’s five again. “Besides, I’m not really one that men would choose. I’m boring- see? Your eyes are droopy just by talking to me.”

“Don’t say that. You just, perhaps, missed the chance.” Her mother softly said. “You’re beautiful even without trying. Are you perhaps scared?” The older taunted.

“It’s nice to sleep on my free days, mama.” Celestina wondered how she could have missed those chances when she had tried to form one. But then again, her beauty doesn’t really count when she’s not really the one they wanted to choose.

O~O~O

The next day, Celestina looked impeccable as ever. One of the things she had learned from her mentor was that when meeting a client, give an impression that their lawyer is fearless and infallible. Impression is key to getting their trust, and everything follows.

Being one of the early birds, she was the only person in the elevator. When the doors closed, she examined her reflection. Her gray suit was free from any wrinkles. She had tied her dark auburn hair in a low ponytail, and chose a darker shade of red for her lips.

Remember that men in power tend to underestimate someone like you when they wanted something to be done for them, Celestina. When you meet them, make sure that they will feel as if they owe you the world-

The elevator doors opened to her floor and she went out, channeling out her courage in her sure smirk. The boxes of files that were promised to be delivered were on her desk, and the people she had agreed to brief regarding her ongoing cases, and cases to be turned over were already waiting for her in the meeting room.

She still have four hours before meeting the very important Vongola don. She could finish briefing her colleagues in three, and follow-up questions will be referred to her former teammate.

This, she thought, is going to be a long day.

O~O~O

Gokudera Hayato learned to be a patient man through the years. There was a sudden change with one of their most important employees handling their activities. Federico Gianni passed away a month ago, concluding his four decade long service to the Vongola family. Honestly, the guy was efficient despite working with him for only seven years. They never really had any problems with their cover businesses, and represented their underground business with the other families smoothly. And when rival families tried to bring some issues to court to expose the Vongola Family’s illegal undertakings, he never bats an eye and languidly wins their case.

They have a lot in mind when choosing their next lawyer, but they prefer to get from the same law firm.

(Their temporary lawyer has questionable credibility, but connections could take a person to the sky in this business.)

To their surprise, Gianni left a letter to them recommending his protégé, instead of some partners who had already made a name for themselves, heck, he chose her over his son. Perhaps, this pity was what people felt when looking at Xanxus after he lied low and allowed Tsunayoshi Sawada to take over the Vongola Decimo title the former coveted. Gianni gave his reassurance that Celestina Milano will be able to carry out the duties he had left up to the Vongola’s standards.

It is usually the right hand man of the boss who handles mediating with these kinds of things to lessen the latter’s work. Although the tenth was kind enough to bother meeting with the new lawyer despite his hectic schedule, Gokudera wanted him to focus on more important things.

He opened the folder containing the information and personal files of their new employee. The law firm informed them that she had accepted the job yesterday.

(They did not tell him that she had resigned her fate to the Vongola. They also did not tell him that she is not the kind to make protests whenever her life is involved because she would most likely realize that the job will affect her life a tad too late. They also did not tell him that she is used to a civilian’s life, unlike her mentor whose family was really involved with the mafia.)

Gokudera read the personal information of Celestina. She was, for the lack of better word, a normal person with a normal background. It was really a wonder how Gianni gave a lot of confidence in her considering the lack of experience in the underground world. The most controversial client she had handled was the son of a multibillionaire who was charged for rape. All evidence were pointing against the said person and yet she managed to get a favorable judgment. (It surprised her too. She had prepared her client to accept the punishment.)

The most famous case she handled was a labor case against Gesso’s cover business (of course, she had no clue the mafia was involved in the mess), and she also won. Of course, she had no idea that Byakuran was being lenient because it was a cover business and they all thought she had her hands on some incriminating evidence that they have illegal transactions.

He took one of the photos attached to the file. For the past month, she was unsuspecting of the people trailing her which was a problem so Vongola Decimo decided that it would be best to have her in a compound where the family can protect her, and if needed her family will be provided with the same level of security. The investigators of his team had provided him of her daily routine, places she frequents, and the members of her family. She is a middle child, with an elder sister and a younger brother. The eldest and the youngest were working in the company of their parents.

“So the second child went on her own way.” Reborn shared his thoughts with Gokudera who seemed to be unimpressed with their new lawyer. “Why don’t we give her a chance, Gokudera?”

Gokudera knew better than to negate whatever Reborn thinks, especially with people who are honestly better than his precious tenth when Gokudera met first met him. “It’s just, she’s normal.”

Reborn rose from his seat, his body finally growing out of the curse in a very normal manner much to the frustration of the arcobaleno. The greatest hitman in the world has a body of a teenager, and Lambo seemed to be older than him in physical appearance. But that didn’t deter them from their niche, and still hailed as the world’s greatest.

“But, Federico will not risk having the family in trouble, so it is best to heed his final counsel.” Reborn had a point, and Gokudera knew that well. “At any rate, it’s not as if being normal would hinder her from work.” The black haired child simply shrugged off Gokudera’s concern and left the bomber to his thoughts.

Gokudera lit a cigarette and took a drag to deal with his thoughts. He took one of the photos from the file and examined the person they would meet. In the picture, she was in a park staring at some far place. If she had been attentive, she would have seen the camera taking a photo of her. Her green eyes gleamed with unspoken amusement at whatever she was looking at. Her thin lips were curved up to a gentle smile. Under the Mediterranean afternoon, she seemed to have tanned after spending some time under the sun, her cheeks a bit flushed. Her dark auburn hair was tied in a half ponytail, seemingly kempt despite the windy afternoon. This particular investigator did a good job with taking her picture as most shots were perfectly timed.

(At times, Hayato would remember the faraway look Bianchi’s mother would give him, somehow reminiscent of the smile Celestina had in the picture)

She seemed to be as oblivious as Haru and Kyoko before Tsuna had spilled the beans. However, Gokudera knew that she wouldn’t be personally picked by Gianni if he saw no potential in her so there must be something.

He finally relaxed on his chair when he accepted the obvious conclusion in his head. Simply put, he decided to just judge Celestina Milano when he met her in person.

Chapter Text

It was unreasonable when a few men have to escort her to the mansion of her client, Celestina mused as she looked at the changing scenery outside the window. The innocent looking guy who may pass as a kindergarten teacher (the guy from yesterday who pretty much told her that she should expect her life to be in deeper crap when the Vongola became her client) was driving her car again. She really had no say in the matter, considering that there was undue influence on his part (and when men in shades were basically training their intimidating aura on her), Celestina really had no say in the matter.

At some point of the road trip, the thought of her being kidnapped and the man driving (and the sleek black car following them which had five armed men) will kill her and dispose her body in the mountains crossed her mind. They reached a forested area, and there was a huge intricately designed gate. It opened automatically after the men at the post had confirmed their identity.

Celestina thought that the long ride was over when the gates opened but all she could see is a road lined by trees. She wouldn’t be surprised if it will take another hour to get to where they were supposed to be.

“Your biometrics will be taken when we reach the mansion, Ms. Milano.” The man gave her a reassuring smile. She nodded back in response, and went back to her train of thought, but that proved to be hard when the guy she hadn’t bothered remembering the name was trying to strike a conversation. “I’ve always admired pretty ladies who fight in par with men.”

Celestina wanted to ignore him really, but he was nothing but courteous and kind to her so she decided to entertain him. “You shouldn’t really categorize me with Margaret Thatcher type of women.” She shrugged, hoping that this will end the conversation.

“Really?” He glanced at her, waiting for her to continue. “But I can see-”

Celestina internally groaned. “Please don’t say potential!” She hurriedly told him so he won’t continue whatever he wanted to say. He laughed.

“Fearless is what I wanted to say though.” He kept his smile, and Celestina thought that she was starting to warm up to him.

“Why?” She asked, a bit surprised at how he would describe her. Emotionless, yes. Blank, she would also say so herself, but fearless? She wanted to laugh at the thought.

“You weren’t really much scared, at most confused.”

Oh, so the normal Celestina. “Yeah, I get that a lot.” They tend to confuse her accepting attitude with courage and she really wanted to laugh at that. It’s not like she really had anything to say about what happens so she decided not to care long time ago. It’s just easier to accept things than fight what she knew she cannot defeat.

(To her surprise, it took them two hours to reach the front porch of the Vongola mansion. It was another half an hour to finish her biometrics.)

Celestina was led to the pavilion, situated at the far end of the flower garden (she was glad that she did not become a sneezing mess throughout the meeting) where three men were waiting for her. Her escorts left, leaving her to the company of a brunette with a pristine suit, a silver head who wore a crimson dress shirt underneath his suit, and a child who wore a suit and a fedora hat where a chameleon perched peacefully. She envied the little reptile right then and there before training her gaze to the humans she needed to be acquainted to.

“I was sent by Atty. Campella to handle your affairs from now on. The untimely demise of our esteemed partner may have caused you some trouble, and we sincerely apologize for that.”  She curtly started because the silence was becoming very, very awkward. “I am Celestina Milano. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” She held out her hand in their general direction, hoping that at least one of them would acknowledge her attempt to knowing their personal names other than, “The tenth” or “whatever-element-or-phenomenon-in-nature Guardian of the tenth Vongola” as was named by some notes left by her mentor (that old man had prepared well for his death but left out the identities in case the envelop and the rest of his belongings go to the wrong hands) she studied overnight.

“We are really grateful that you accepted us, Miss Milano.” The man with messy brunette locks gave a warm smile, and shook her hand. “We heard that Atty. Federico was your mentor. We are sorry for your loss.”

Celestina couldn’t quite determine if the person before her was a native or a foreigner but he had no Italian accent in him.

“I am Tsunayoshi Sawada, the tenth Vongola boss.” Tsuna introduced himself to their new employee. It was still awkward for him to tell people that he is the leader of the infamous Vongola family, known for being a mafia but the government can’t find any dirt to throw them in jail. “This is my right hand man, Hayato Gokudera.” He gestured toward the silver head who nodded at her in greeting. “And this is Reborn.” He gestured at the child.

The greatest hitman, whose body has yet to catch up with his age, nodded in acknowledgment of the newcomer. The lawyer responded by returning the gesture to the teenager.

The brunette vaguely gestured at the table where tea was prepared for them. His sentence may have been well formulated in his head but the tense atmosphere, and the pressure he has on his plate simply made him squeak out, “Tea!” in Japanese before he delivered the sentence in Italian.

Celestina almost smiled, but she hid it behind her hands and pretended to clear her throat just in case the Vongola takes offense in simple things. “I would love to, Mr. Sawada.” Tsuna smiled, relieved to be addressed in a normal manner. The scowl on the silver head’s face and the very killing intent which radiated from the teenager told her otherwise. The auburn haired woman found herself clearing her throat once more. “I would love to, Decimo.” She corrected, sparing a glance at the two men (one man and child) whose non-verbal expression became more amicable.

The two men left her with Decimo when the latter told the two that they can rest for a bit. Of course, Reborn had reminded him that he has a meeting at four o’clock with Varia that afternoon.

Gokudera maintained his eye contact with her. A warning, one Celestina knew too well. Sometimes it was directed to her out of concern, at times it was filled with hostility. But she cannot quite determine if the one that Gokudera Hayato was giving her was out of concern or hostility. She could read the pity in his eyes, but there was also some wariness.

After sharing that short meal, a merenda, Tsuna led Celestina inside the Vongola mansion where the silver head is already waiting for them. “Although I may need you for some meeting, Hayato will be the one you will be working with mostly.” The brunette turned to leave, but addressed her again when he remembered something. “This is your choice, Ms. Milano. But I am extending an invitation that you become part of the Vongola Family.” When Celestina opened her mouth (they could see her confusion, with the way her brows furrowed and her calm expression crumbled in an instant), Tsuna gestured vaguely in the air. “Ah, you don’t have to answer that. It’s your choice, and your answer will not affect our deal!” He hurriedly clarified. 

Celestina nodded in understanding. Tsuna excused himself afterwards, and went to somewhere in the castle, leaving her with Gokudera Hayato.

“You are aware of the nature of our trade, right?” Gokudera led her to his office, which was surprisingly neat. The humidifier somehow masked the scent of cigarette smoke, which helps the right hand man’s guests to breathe freely. He proceeded on explaining on how the trade went deeper, how there are two contracts made in every transaction unless it be within the family, and even then, she would be the one handling it. Gokudera handed to her a file. “You need to know the Omerta Code we practice.” The flash drive contained said Code, a law that Mafioso abide by. He explained the gist of the laws, and she got the idea. “Do you have any questions?”

“Have you ever considered the effects of your chain smoking? Yeah, and third hand smoke was found to be more fatal, so, have you checked your subordinates’ health lately?” Celestina couldn’t stop the word vomit. She shouldn’t have said her random thoughts out loud but the itchiness in her nose couldn’t be ignored any longer. But she wouldn’t tell him that. “Not that I am saying that you should quit smoking for the welfare of humanity, because we know well that there needs to be a serious population control, and you have every right to do tasks that will help you at ease.”

In all honesty, this was her way to prevent herself from scoffing at the term the silver head used. Trade. What a way to make the business look so normal!

The annoyed look he gave her seemed not to faze her at all, though.

O~O~O

Celestina had been used to her schedule for the past two months. The first week was difficult, but she managed to adapt. Her Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays were days where she would be working in the Vongola headquarters for half a day, while the rest of her days was devoted for her other clients. Most of her job involves the legal matters of the Vongola cover business- the construction industry (Gokudera being the head, and a stockholder of some other businesses owned by the Vongola), hotels and casinos, and other industries that may seem to be so innocent and convenient to hide the underground dealings. At times, she would negotiate with the precinct, the prosecutor, and the judge to dismiss the accused (under some guise of a normal worker or whatever but really a Vongola underling) for some cases charged. Other cases were litigated, but the ones who visited the accused was not their superior, but their family members.

She chose to accept the facts that they have given her, both the corporate matters and some criminal matters they asked her to help with, and pretended that the other party was not deliberately hiding facts from her. Although at times, if she could see that there might be loopholes, she would demand that everything will be given to her so she could draft a clever form that will safeguard her clients.

Her monthly liens tripled, and she had not much of use for them. She had most of them saved but when she was able to make a deed for the Vongola and got a very high compensation, she would donate some to the local hospital. The human part of her wanted to cleanse her soul from the sins she has accumulated for the past months when she accepted the Vongola in her plate. But then again, she had long ago given up on that faith.

At sundown, she goes to the Universtiy to teach aspiring law students.

She had been surprised a week ago when Yamamoto Takeshi had accompanied her to some crime scene in a hotel where the victim was part of another family who kept on bugging the Vongola. The Varia was sent to kill them, and one of their subordinates was captured in the CCTV. It would be too obvious that the baseball star was part of the family, so when one of the investigators and the prosecutor (who Celestina knew back in her undergrad days) asked why he was here, she had to make up some excuse.)

The government had suspected who are part of the mafia organization. Campella warned her of the risks, the consequences, and how it wouldn’t be unethical and cowardice if she backs out any time. He helps her with her work by providing information on the intel the government has regarding her clients.

“Takeshi, sweetheart, why did you follow me here?” Celestina rushed to his side and hooked her arm to his, tilting her head slightly to the side to show her confusion. She was blushing, but she needed to do it for a client. “I told you to wait for me in the car.”

Yamamoto wasn’t as oblivious as how he always make it seem. Brushing the stray locks from her face, he lovingly took her hand and kissed the knuckles. “I was worried that you might pass out any moment. You’ve been working nonstop.”

Thankfully, the attention was turned to Yamamoto again and how most of the investigating team was a fan. It was not suspicious that he was present at the scene thanks to that act.

A day ago, her client committed suicide in the courtroom, when the information was being read. No one had seen that he stitched an explosive in his side before he was detained. He fished out a phone (where that came from, no one knows) and called a number. Celestina headed to him to reprimand him of his conduct.

“Sir, who gave you that phone?” Celestina was furious, as she turned to the police officers present in the Court, who were equally shocked. “Please deposit the phone-”

Before the sergeant-at-arms could even reach him, his body exploded. She wiped the liquid splashed at her, warm and sticky. Her hand was red, and her beige suit was stained with her client’s blood. Most of her front was red, and even the prosecutor (two years ahead of her back in law school but he became a library buddy) went to her, asking if she’s all right.

She tried her best to keep her trembling form. Appearances are important in their profession after all. She bit her lip, wiped her face with her blazer to make herself at least look presentable.

The judge, after a few minutes, shouted an order Celestina cannot quite register but moments later there were another team of forensics, investigators and some medical staff coming in.

The medics attended to her, asking her if she’s all right and if she feels any pain.

Celestina shook her head. “It’s not my blood.” She answered, eyes not leaving the remnants of her deceased client. Her body was cold despite the warm life liquid splashed all over her clothes. The medics gave her a towel and alcohol so she could cleanse her bare skin.

The police officers asked her questions about her client. She answered the basic information and those that she could provide the law enforcers.

Since Yamamoto was the one on duty to go with her, she was glad when he arrived two hours later to collect her. No one suspected that he’s part of the Vongola, not with his genuine concern for her, not with how he held her close as he guided her to their car and assuring her that everything will be okay.

Much to his surprise, a few minutes after he took her home, she went to her room and changed to a blue blouse and a pencil skirt. She held her black blazer and asked him if the Ciello Family was in the meeting place. Yamamoto nodded and accompanied her throughout the deal before taking her home to rest. He was staring at her with concern but she reassured him that she’s fine. It sometimes happen.

The swordsman humored her, and let her be.

(Briefly, Yamamoto wondered if most of her clients would commit some sort of hara-kiri before the trial starts.)

When he left, she went to the garden to burn the beige suit, her black heels she wore during that trial, and the files of the man whose legs while the rest of his body became a debris in the court room will be all over the media by tomorrow.

Celestina reached the faculty room, her colleagues giving her a concerned look. She wore a red sleeveless blouse with a ruffled collar, a pair of black slacks, and black stilettos.

“Hey, we saw today’s papers.” Regina approached her, holding her hands in a comforting manner. “How are you feeling?” She asked. Regina is her friend, and Celestina could always tell her everything. Well, not everything, but she could tell her those feelings.

“A bit shocked still, but I’ll be fine.” Celestina walked to her desk to get the class cards. “I just wanted a break so I went here earlier than usual. I see engineering students everywhere.” It was five minutes before her class starts but she decided to be early. After making plans with her friend for dinner, she headed to her classroom and patiently waited beside the door.

Some of her students were outside, reading the material and cases that she told them to be covered for today. When five minutes passed, and they were still outside, she asked one of her students what class occupied her room. She usually maximize the fifteen minute grace period for professors to give her students more time to study.

“Ah, the class is a major subject in advanced engineering, ma’am.” The third year student answered, hiding his book from her sight so she won’t see the doodles and the notes he had written. “It’s usually empty whenever it is our period, so perhaps the professor is maximizing the period?” He turned to his classmate for back-up so their professor won’t talk to him. Atty. Milano may be a good professor but inside the classroom, it feels as though she is cross-examining them. In other words, their life is a living hell.

“He usually dismisses them early.” Ariana Campella, one of Celestina’s senior partner’s daughter, informed her. “Their professor’s kinda cute.”

Celestina gave an amused smile at them. “And fifteen minutes passed.” She peeked through the rectangular window placed on the door, just to make sure that the professor is not someone who is higher than her (inwardly, she wanted to bully the professor if he’s younger). Her eyes widened when she recognized the person giving a very detailed lecture to the undergraduate students. He’s a professor?!

“Are you all right ma’am? You know, with what happened yesterday, we were thinking you are still recovering from the blow. No pun intended.” One of her students asked, noticing the rare reaction (students seem to see their professors as infallible human beings, detached from any human emotions) which startled her.

Celestina turned to glare down at the preposterous student, but she only yelped when her head hit the transparent glass, which in turn became a knock. She turned to the silver head who was not standing beside the whiteboard. Letting her guard down, she turned to back to her student with a glare-

“Is there something you need?” Emerald eyes met emerald. The man with silver head kept up the pretense not to know her. However, when he saw Celestina peeking, his mind raced and he could only blame that baseball freak for being slacking off when he was supposed to convince the Varia that drastic measures should not be taken unless the man was found guilty. They may have to find a new one if this (grudgingly admitted by Gokudera) efficient lawyer decides to quit on them.

“The classroom.” Celestina wondered if she was just short or Gokudera was just tall. She would accept being half a head shorter than Yamamoto Takeshi. Although shorter than Yamamoto, she has to slightly tilt her head up to meet with the right hand man eye to eye. “Your time is up, professor.” Her calm demeanor returned, and she made a mental note to call the student who startled her first.

Gokudera’s eyes widened at the realization. “I’m sorry about that. I’m just going to dismiss before that baseball freak-”

“Yo, Hayato!” Yamamoto’s cheery voice made Celestina froze in her place.

“Just wait there.” Gokudera addressed Yamamoto with an irritating look before glancing at Celestina. “I’m going to dismiss them. I’m sorry.” He went back inside and scolded his class to inform him of the time. Some of them apologized and told him how they enjoyed today’s lesson before they gathered their things and left.

Yamamoto laughed at the sight.

“Oh, it’s Atty. Milano’s boyfriend.” One brave, unfortunate soul blurted out.

Gokudera gasped at the new information. He turned to Celestina who looked so uncomfortable looking everywhere but them, and then to Yamamoto in disbelief. The Japanese swordsman gave the silver head a carefree smile. Just one week and-

“You,” Celestina turned to the student with a sweet smile. Everyone could feel the usually warm hallway becoming cold, their heart racing fast for some unknown reason. Gokudera and Yamamoto were also having goosebumps. “Be sure that when I enter the classroom, you are ready for recitation.” Said student hurriedly went inside. The unfortunate third year could only curse at his luck instead of going over the provisions of the law.

“Since when did you-” Gokudera gaped at the baseball star in horror. They do not need an additional distraction in the midst of their busiest season so far.

Yamamoto gave a sheepish grin and placed an arm on Celestina’s shoulder. “Yeah, well there’s the crime scene, and-”

“We’re still in the dating phase.” Celestina gave a small smile. “We started last Monday.” She patted his hand, trying not to flinch at the sudden contact. From the looks of it, everyone seemed to be off guard.

A look of apprehension crossed Gokudera’s olive orbs. He nodded at Celestina, quite impressed with how she keeps mum about things. “Yeah, and your date and I have more important things to do.”

“I didn’t know that you teach where Gokudera also teach.” Yamamoto diverted the topic, slowly pulling away from the girl. The media seemed to assume much.

She gave a very awkward smile at that.

Chapter Text

Celestina became well acquainted with the ins and outs of the Vongola’s legal cover up businesses for the past months. They have a wide range of industries such as pharmaceuticals, construction and development, mining, job contracting, hotels and casinos, and others that seem to be convenient excuse to, so to speak, cover their underground business. Sometimes, Tsuna calls her for consultation on some contract and how to deal with the demands of another party. She works mostly with Gokudera Hayato, the CEO of the construction and development firm as he is also a stockholder of some other corporations. Sawada Tsunayoshi occasionally shows up, a shade paler each time she sees him.

Gokudera’s job is to make sure that their cover up businesses have no problem that would involve the things handled personally by the boss- amongst other things. This is where Celestina would enter, making sure that these businesses are all clean, and the usual legal dealings are properly handled.

Most days, she’s with the Vongola’s cover up business situated in the central business district. She would check on the papers, the contracts and participate with the meeting of the boards if she was called.

This particular day, they were in the board room listening to one of the proposals of the marketing head. The company was moving for the patent of this particular design, so her presence and Gokudera’s were indispensable.

Although she wanted to really listen to the monotonous presentation, she could feel seasoned eyes were trained on her. She started picking on her finger nails under the table, a mannerism her mother had always scolded her for.

Celestina was recovering quite well from the incident, so to speak. Her senior partner had scheduled her to some counselling session with his psychiatrist friend. The psychiatrist has given her the clearance after fourth weekly session.

She turned to Gokudera who didn’t turn away. They were staring at each other for a while, him scowling at her.

Celestina was the first one to break the contract.

When the meeting ended, Celestina was arranging the documents passed to her by the project head. She has to arrange them to be processed for patenting. The other board members already left, as it was time to go home.

Gokudera stayed, taking advantage of the privacy the room offered. He locked the room for good measure, and took a seat across Celestina. “Your psychiatrist gave us a report.”

Celestina smirked when she turned to him. “I knew it!” She beamed at him as if she had just confirmed her theories. “You’re the ones who insisted I seek professional help.”

He raised a brow at her. “You do not trust Campella to actually care for your mental well-being?” He gave a teasing smirk. “I can’t wait to see the look on his face that his darling associate whom he treats as a daughter think so little of him.”

Celestina paused from sorting the papers, and sat straight to look at her companion. “He does care for his associates. But he knows how I handle those things.” It was her turn to have a teasing glint in her eyes. “Besides, you hate people who gossips, if your more-scornful-scowls-and-glares meant any other indication when you see some of the staff crowding almost whispering with each other in one part of the room during breaks.” 

The lawyer, despite her amicable nature, keeps a safe distance from the group. Not too far as to be seen a snob, but not too close for people to easily cross her comfort zone. The only times she would get too close to a person is when she had actually dropped her guard and let the person enter her world.

It was perhaps the reason that Gokudera chose her companionship in the lazy breaks. She would stay near the coffee machine, leaning against the wall as she observes each one with her polite smile grazing her features. There is a space between them whenever they are seen together. She has no interest for small talks like Gokudera. The silence between them is comfortable. If either of them chooses to break it, it’s because of some remark that one of them has observed- one that was unusually present.

The comment can be anything, like how Marcius seems to lean closer to Gretha, or how Mary’s laughter cannot hide her struggles. At times, they would indulge in some conversation that took their interest, Gokudera telling her of the recent UMA theories. Celestina telling him of the poetry she heard and her interpretations- ever the cynic even when the verses portray some light topic.

Gokudera remembered how Campella hesitated when they were proposing that kind of help for Celestina. The bomber just thought that, perhaps, someone like her would need it since the incident is not within her usual work. She usually witnesses the aftermath of a crime, where blood is already shed, and the smell has already dissipated.

“Are you angry?” He watched her slouch on the chair and stretch her arms. Perhaps her quick-to-let-go attitude made her an efficient lawyer, even when it is something that would haunt her.

“Not really.” Celestina looked up the ceiling, squinting at the white light. “Knowledge is power after all.” She averted her gaze from the blinding light to the messy silver locks that seem to shine when flooded with the light.

He couldn’t help but agree. He took a cigarette from his pack and placed it on his mouth. He never lit the stick as it will trigger the fire alarm. “You don’t seem bothered by it. Are you really all right? I understand that it is not normal.”

She continued sorting the papers just like how the sun would rise in the east every day. She was good at hiding whatever eats her up, it seems. “Does it alarm you?” There is no answer, so she continued, shrugging her shoulders. “I just choose to detach myself from that memory. Perhaps he wanted that way out, or he was left with no choice. Frankly, I kind of expected Joker calling the authorities demanding some sort of -yeah” She waved vaguely at the air, chuckling in spite of herself. “His family won’t be burdened with liabilities. His wife’s calm expression bothered me more, to be honest.”

“What did she tell you?” Gokudera leaned slightly towards her, hands on his lap.

“Not much really.” Celestina was drawing circles on the table with her hand, already finished with the sorting. She was just checking if she missed anything or misplaced a page. “After thanking me and apologizing, I just thought that she has this look- one that expected this will happen. The death, I mean.” She clarified. “Not the, you know, messy red courtroom- that is a nice title for an urban legend don’t you think?” Gokudera’s brows rose, slightly amused at her ad libs. “So, anyway, she just sighed. Like she was relieved but she looked hurt still.”

“You seem to be contradicting your premises.” Gokudera leaned back on his chair.

“It’s like having two friends and you know the other two are best friends.” Gokudera nodded, urging her to continue. “And then there’s a fight between you and the other, and when the third friend took the other’s side you weren’t surprised. Quite relieved because you expected it.” He snorted at that. Celestina’s smile widened.

Gokudera expected that she would want to have some space. It surprised him that she reported for work the day following the incident instead for asking a leave. Her work performance did not drop (of which he was amazed and glad), she went on with her usual sarcastic self.

He did not expect her to give an analysis on the widow their man had left after that messy red courtroom incident. “Most beautiful women would already be in tears, probably would be traumatized for life if they witnessed that scene.” He smirked at her. The trick always works too. Most women would only hear the compliment, and they would be a blushing mess. He merely intended to tease her, really.

Celestina’s smile vanished, and she was almost pouting. She sighed as she tucked the papers in the folder. “I’m flattered you see me as a beautiful woman, but I am not one of them, Mr. Gokudera.” She pushed her chair back as she rose from her seat. “If that is all, I’ll see you next week?”

Gokudera’s brows furrowed.  He nodded in response, and she didn’t even look back and ask what he plans on doing as she usually does. He watched her head to the door to leave. He abruptly stood, raking a hand through his silver locks. Somehow, he feels bad at the look of disappointment that crosses her face.

Campella’s response then echoed in the bomber’s head. “You’ll find it sad if you discover the things that fazes her.”

O~O~O

Celestina watched the graceful dancers languidly move at the dance floor in synchronized motion, switching partners after every song. The crowd is a mixed of wealthy people- old and new rich- that one couldn’t exactly determine if these people are actually clean or bleached.

Gokudera was talking with a prominent designer’s family. The young woman accompanying the prominent person resembles the man, no doubt his darling daughter. She was blushing, her eyes only seeing the silver haired man.

Celestina wasn’t supposed to be here, but there seemed to be some discrepancies on the financial statements of the Hotel and Casino Corporation handled exclusively by the businessmen who provides protection money, the corporation where the Vongola represented by one of Gokudera’s trusted men is a major stockholder. She wouldn’t be bothered by it, had she not felt any goosebumps after remembering the report of the casino owned by the Vongola actually raising profits this quarter in the same amount the other lost. 

From the other side, there’s a group of men with their respective bodyguards placed at the corner. The loudest of the group seems to be giving praises to the man with pinstriped suit who stood with authority. The man in the pinstriped suit is a known President of the Chamber of Deputies- Sergio Maratella.

Maratella rose from his seat, and headed to the other side of the room where his known friends in the chamber are talking in one table. His dutiful guard followed him.

Celestina rose from her seat, earning Gokudera’s attention.

His green eyes followed the direction where his companion fled until he lost sight of her in the sea of people. His gaze returned to the kind businessman, Caesar Azeglio, that Tsuna is fond of, describing him as warm as the ninth’s flame. Although he is not really part of the mafia, he gives protection money to the Vongola to prevent other families from extorting his establishment.

Azeglio is a shrewd man who values his family. While some of their business associates, mafia or civilian, had been introducing to him some of their daughters for Gokudera to form some relationship, Azeglio never bothered introducing his daughter despite her not so subtle nudges and glances.

Gokudera respected that, and simply ignored the existence of Azeglio’s daughter. He’s not one for commitment anyway.

“I must say,” Azeglio gave a warning glance at his daughter who opted to drink from her glass to hide her shame. “It’s unusual for you to attend a party without a pretty girl accompanying you all the time. Are you, by chance, alone?” The businessman saw Gokudera with a beautiful lady, but not the usual kind of girl he would usually string along in this kind of events.

While most of the dates he had observed the younger man brought are the sly ones who would never leave his side, the one he brought this time is a bit reserved and one that Azeglio could talk easily with. He had a chance of sharing a small talk with her, and she did not give him those guarded smiles and wary glances. She simply answered him candidly, creating this secure atmosphere in the midst of cautious men.

“Not quite.” Gokudera smirked, ignoring the frown adorning Azeglio’s daughter. “I came with someone a bit different.” He turned to the direction where she left, catching sight of her talking with a guest. He could see the way her hands gripped the glass tightly, frowning a bit when the man she was talking to leaned a little bit too close for comfort. She took a step back and searched the crowd for some rescue.

Azeglio couldn’t help but smile when Gokudera was sending glares at the unsuspicious man who seemed to be flirting with his date. “How so?”

Gokudera only realized then that he has been spending time with Celestina outside work as well. They would mostly dine together after they have finished their respective job during the days that she is needed by the Vongola. Sometimes, when he has less work, he would wait for her in the campus grounds and ask her for dinner and offer a ride home. She would accept, and they would eat in nearby diners. He got tired of the usual food they eat, and he learned that despite coming from a conventional family, she never really learned how to cook. So after buying some ingredients, Gokudera cooked dinner for two in her kitchen. Celestina seemed to like his cooking (she asked shyly for seconds), although he slightly got offended that she was surprised that he can cook. 

He did not remember how that routine came to be, but he swore it started with that woman’s love for ice cream and inability to cook to save her life. How could she not learn one of the fundamental skills to survive?

Azeglio waited for Gokudera’s answer but he was busy looking at his date, as if everything around him was forgotten. There’s something different in those green eyes, those usually wary and guarded orbs were filled with warmth. “You are fond of her, Hayato.”

Azeglio then saw the unusually bright expression on Gokudera dimmed. The younger man scowled in denial of the fondness he held.

Azelgio realized that the man before him is scared. It is understandable but sad at the same time. People like him were forced to grow up after being born in a world they did not choose to live in.

“No, she’s an efficient one, that’s all.” Gokudera abruptly excused himself, saving whatever dignity he has left. 

He shook his head, dissipating thoughts of Celestina’s small gestures that he really appreciated- like bringing another umbrella during that day where the clouds were too low just for him because she knew that he wouldn’t bring one, or the time when she brought food for him after he just came from some meeting and they agreed to meet in the office for official business, or asking him if he’s arrived home safe after dropping her off at her house.

They have a cover now, it seemed. Gokudera remembered how she came to him that afternoon, demanding his secretary that she must talk with him. Her Wednesdays are for her other legal duties outside the Vongola, so when she came, he immediately allowed her to enter his office. She came in with an unusually bulky briefcase, embracing a folder with her other hand. He learned that she rescheduled all her appointments for the day to settle the issue at hand.

He had to admit that whoever was behind this mess made a good job of covering it up to throw the dirt to them. But what impressed him more is Celestina’s foresight and intuition.

It seems fitting that this party would provide them the information they needed. Gokudera is always invited in these kinds of events, and he insisted that she needs to work on her bluffing skills, and her poker face-

Even he knew from afar that Celestina’s mind was drifting away from the conversation.

“Celestina,” Gokudera placed an arm on her waist, pulling her closer to him. “There you are, my dear.” He felt her relax when she learned that it was him. Upon realizing the display of intimacy they shared, he held her closer so she wouldn’t pull away from him. He would tease her later for openly blushing like a teenager.

Upon closer look, Gokudera found that the man talking to Celestina is a prominent public figure. Ron Markel is a philanthrophist who organized many charity events around the globe. The silver haired bomber could only wonder for the reason of his presence in this high class event.

“Oh, I didn’t think you would bring someone here.” Ron’s brows knitted as he merely glanced at Gokudera, not even bothering to give a polite greeting. “He’s not the one I imagine you would date.”

Celestina’s polite smile became a frown at the apparent disdain Ron held. “Let me introduce you. Hayato, this is Ron. He’s my classmate during my undergrad.” She leaned towards the taller man, keeping up with the pretense he wanted people to believe. “And actually, he’s the one who brought me here.” 

Gokudera almost snorted at the rigid stance she maintained against him. Perhaps the realm of intimacy is very foreign for someone like her.

“I’d like to think that you would go out with reputable men.” Ron eyed Gokudera from head to toe. “Celestina, I’ll take you home. This man is dangerous from what I heard. He is a bastard of a rich man, and I don’t know what other unsavory things he could do.” He held out his hand for Celestina. They were not just classmates back in college, her friends told him that she had feelings for him. Surely, she would simply nod and believe his words like she used to back then.

Celestina was becoming pale. She could feel her heart race as she glared at her acquaintance. She wanted to slap her past self for even fancying this person years ago. Infatuation made her blind, but at least she could see it now. “I don’t think so.”

Gokudera wanted to look smug, but whatever Ron said was true. He would not begrudge her if she left him, right then and there as long as she would still serve Tsuna and carry out her tasks well. However, even the raw emotions he heard surprised him.

“Look, I have reliable information-” Ron took her arm, trying to forcefully pull her away from Gokudera.

“No, Ron!” She hissed, peeling off his hand from her arm. “He’s not what you think he is, and he is not what people- whoever told you whatever you heard.” She smiled coldly at Ron, and to some of the ladies around them who were eying their little group curiously.

Gokudera nudged her elbow lightly, cocking his head a general direction where they could escape this man. She was obviously in the verge of tears but she’s too proud to show it. Fortunately, the orchestra’s song was a little loud that only the groups nearby could notice that their little group was having some conflict.

“He’s dangerous, Celestina. Listen to me, I may have broken your heart a few years back but-”

“Everyone in this room is dangerous, and that includes me. You are not exempt from the doubt as well.” Celestina cut him off, taking a step away from Ron. She could feel her face heat up, both from the anger and shame from the scene she was causing. “And that is low of you.” Looking back, she feels no regret that she had not personally told him of that fleeting crush she once felt for him. “It has been a pleasure meeting you again.” Her icy tone told Ron otherwise.

Gokudera took her hand and led her out of the room.

When she realized that they were leaving, she suddenly stopped, taking a deep breath to keep down her emotions. “We’re leaving?”

Gokudera rolled his eyes. “Do you want to go back there?” He took her confusion as an opportunity to pull her to the receiving area.

She was silent as he called for their driver to fetch them where they were dropped off.  When he was finished with the call, she gripped on her clutch bag tightly. “Hayato, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let my anger get the better of me but I can’t stand that he is insulting you.” Her eyes are a bit watery but she wouldn’t let her tears fall.

Gokudera sighed, patting her shoulder and giving it a slight comforting squeeze. He found, despite the failed mission, it’s hard to be angry at someone like her. “It’s not your fault. That bastard was being persistent.” He wanted to make it clear that he’s not upset with her. Just with life in general. “But he makes a valid point. I am dangerous.”

“But you are not. At least with me.” Celestina insisted, frowning at his self-depreciating tendencies. “I trust you.”

He looked away, feeling some sort of guilt. “I must be honest then. I trust you to handle matters of our family but when the time comes that-”

“I know that!” It surprised him, her acceptance. “I know, and it doesn’t have to be mutual.” Her voice cracked in spite of herself, but she has to convey it to him too. “I know, you will think of this as a naïve thought. But I trust you. You don’t have to choose, because I am not asking for it to be reciprocated. I know that you will ensure of my well-being and safety, however, I understand that your family’s interest are more important.” Her sigh is reminiscent of the sigh he heard from Tsuna when he was inaugurated as the Vongola Decimo- there was an absolute acceptance on her voice like a convict facing his execution after a long hearing.

“And I can’t stand it. He only relied on what other people told him without even determining for himself whether it was true or not. You are more than those rumors, Hayato.” She finally wiped her tears.

Gokudera shook his head. “I am really a bastard.” There’s a small smile on his face, waiting for the usual reaction he gets whenever he relays such information- utter disbelief and disappointment, and then pity.

“Well, being a bastard has nothing to do with how one treats people.” Celestina resolutely answered, surprising the Storm guardian. “Sometimes, those who claim to be with the best intentions are actually the people we should be wary of.”

The car arrived, stopping in front of them. Gokudera stopped an attendant from approaching them, not wanting to be bothered at all. He took Celestina’s hand and led her to the waiting vehicle. She almost pulled away had he not tightened his hold on her. His free hand opened the door for her. When she was comfortably settled inside, he followed, sitting beside her and instructing the driver to head to Celestina’s residence.

Gokudera loosened the knot of his tie, and unbuttoned the first two buttons of his maroon dress shirt. He ignored Celestina’s glances and heavy sighs in favor of some shut eye. Normally, she would look away- either she’s not used to it or for modesty.

“Hayato,” Celestina poked his cheek, much to the bomber’s chagrin, “I am really sorry for messing up.” They both know that he had not gone to dreamland yet.

Gokudera abruptly turned to her, slapping away her hand and ready to let out string of curses because he was really tired but his voice seemed to have abandoned him. He couldn’t really bring himself to shout at her especially when she did nothing to actually jeopardize the situation. “Your ex-boyfriend was actually at fault, and I am not angry at you. Besides, we won’t solve those problems overnight, so even if we stayed there’s not much more we could discover.”

Relief overwhelmed Celestina as she looked away from the bomber to hide her smile. “I’ll really make it up to you.”

Gokudera stared at her for a couple of seconds before he instructed the driver to take them to one of the newly opened Spanish restaurant in town. “Treat me dinner, then.” He leaned against the window and closed his eyes.

He felt a finger poke his cheek again. “Cheapskate.” Then, her hand tucked some strands of his hair behind his ear.

Chapter Text

Celestina noticed the majority of the people who already occupied the tables in the restaurant are young couples. Although she was also feeling hungry after a tiring (impromptu) socialization event, the sight of them made her want to go back the way she came from.

 It did not help that the waitress assisting them was giving her knowing smiles as she led the two of them to the balcony that has a great seaside view. She looked down, avoiding the waitress’ gaze and Gokudera’s teasing smirk. Her face felt warm as she bit her nail. 

 Gokudera went ahead and pulled a seat, giving Celestina a smirk. His short nap allowed him to regain his energy and the promise of a free meal lifted his spirits. He raised a brow when she walked pass him and sat on the untouched chair.

 A slightly older couple a few tables across them were giving him looks of disapproval, the woman shaking her head before turning to her date.

  When Gokudera sat, Celestina was already studying the menu like how she studies the legal forms in her office. He could only chuckle before he finally got a taste of his nicotine fix. His eyes read the menu, mind fixed on what he would eat the moment he saw what he wanted.

  A few minutes later they ordered. Celestina allowed the evening breeze to tickle her bare skin. Her companion seemed to be enjoying the cool sea breeze as well as he sat back and gazed at the gentle waves touching the damp sand.

  There are couples walking on the sandy shore, some lone men or women simply enjoying the scenery in a warm summer night.

  Gokudera’s eyes landed to a particular couple, a man who seemed to be older than his father, with slicked brown hair some strands already lacking the melanin like his youth he once had. A young woman was embracing him as they walked on barefoot. Her eyes narrowed at the sight, her face unreadable.

 Celestina had a look of melancholy in her face. She was staring at the general direction of the ocean, brows knitted in confusion. She looked like she had replaced Atlas in carrying the world.

 He called for one of the servers and ordered a bottle of dry wine. He poured a generous amount on their glasses and slipped one to Celestina. “You look like you needed one anyway.”

 Celestina chuckled as she shook her head. Her smile did not reach her eyes and he could only curse at that Ron. Her hand stopped on the table, just a few inches away from the glass. “Is this your way of trying to get secrets from me? I am telling you, I may have low alcohol tolerance but I am a sleepy drunk and not the wailing loud drunk. Not that I have been drunk before.”

 He lit another cigarette. “I have other ways of making you tell me information.” He was giving her a knowing smirk that she had to look away.

 “Fair enough.” She took the glass, raised it towards him in a mock cheers, and drank all in one go.

 “Don’t blame me if you get stomachaches later.” Gokudera grumbled. He didn’t see the usual hesitance she would have whenever she was offered a drink, and it baffled him. “Did your ex-boyfriend bother you that much?”

 Celestina was confused for a moment before her face lit up with comprehension. “Ron is not my ex-boyfriend. We never dated, really.” She added as an afterthought, “Just for the record, I don’t have an ex-boyfriend.”

 He blew smoke and watched as it rose in the air. “And yet he claimed to have broken your heart .”

 She laughed wryly. “He did.” She placed her arm on the table. “All right, since you are interested, it’s the least I do since I messed up.”

 “You did not mess up, just so we’re clear.” Gokudera placed the cigarette on the ash tray. He took the wine bottle and poured them another batch.

 “I used to like him back then. Then my friend told him, without my permission but she was concerned, that I am interested in him so he sent me a message telling me to stop those feelings because he loves his childhood friend more. The message was long but that was the gist of it.”

 “He’s not worth it.”

 “Or perhaps, I’m not worth it.” She softly muttered to herself, thinking that the sound of the gentle waves was enough to cover her voice. The couple that Gokudera was watching were still there. Celestina watched as they shared a heated kiss, her nose wrinkled in disgust at the sight.

 He followed her line of sight. She may have spent most of her time with her mother and father who has a different norm during their time. It influenced her perhaps.

 The servers arrived with their food. They placed their respective orders in front of them, and left after the Stom guardian dismissed them.

 “Don’t be like that to yourself.” Gokudera never learned how to comfort someone.

 “At some point, we’ll have to realize it. I just have come to accept those terms.” She shrugged as she reached for her utensils. “It’s easier that way.”

 “That’s frankly stupid.” Gokudera saw a flash of anger in her eyes, but it quickly dissipated.

 “But you do think that some of the women you pursue- if you actually pursued them at all- “

 “How’d you know of my activities?”

 “The maids talk. And my mentor kind of left me some instructions on you guys. Briefed me on each of you. Be wary of the good looking Storm guardian, you might find him attractive, but he, like you, doesn’t know what you are looking for.” Celestina was gesturing vaguely in the air, hoping that he will not make any comments about her blushing face.

 “As I was saying, those women you bedded,” She fidgeted on her seat, “are only worth one night.” How the conversation turned into this, both of them had no idea. “Some didn’t last half a year when you were in a more serious relationship.” He didn’t deny it, so perhaps it was true.

 Perhaps he deserved that so he could only mumble some curses. “We were clear on that aspect. Maintaining a relationship is hard.” He saw her nodding in agreement. “That’s why you also don’t want to be involved in one, am I right?”

 “Yes and no.”

 “Which is it, woman?”

 She laughed at his irritated response. “Yes, I agree that I find it hard to let myself be involved in a relationship. But it is for entirely different reasons.” She pointed his meal with her spoon. “Although, if I tell that to you now, it will be depressing and I don’t want to spoil your meal.”

 He called out her unfairness as he glared at her.

 She laughed in response, turning to the direction of the couple she was watching with disgust. They were gone. She laughed at his scowl but she did not indulge his curiosity. Instead, she took the wine bottle to refill his empty glass.

 She raised her drink towards him, raising a brow at him in challenge. “All right, you are being petty.”

 “And you are unusually eager for liquor. Careful now, you might develop a drinking problem.” He grudgingly took the glass in his hand and raised it towards her.

 Celestina did not allow him to place the glass back on the table. “Drink it, Hayato.”

 “Fine, woman!” He drank the contents of his glass, intently staring at Celestina who followed his example.

 He finished drinking the wine first, having drank much stronger kinds of alcohol, extravagantly showing her that he’s finished. He tapped the table with his finger to pressure her to finish drinking hers.

 There’s a little left on her glass but he didn’t say anything. Her cheeks were already red and he somehow regretted ordering that bottle.

 They focused on eating their meals afterwards, with a few small talks in between. It started with Celestina’s pet cat who died a few years ago, then he shared his experience with Uri. The topic shifted to lighter ones like UMAs and she gave some input about the urban legends she has read.

 Celestina received a message from her mother telling her that her father was in Greece for some consultancy job. She wondered if her father was lost that he thought the beach where Celestina unknowingly watched him with his latest other woman.

 Gokudera noticed that her laughter seemed forced and she picked on her nails every now and then when she would take a glance at the beach (probably scared of the having to experience secondhand embarrassment when couples would PDA), but he never said anything about it. 

 O~O~O

 Gokudera knew that Thursdays were days given to Celestina to entertain her less important clients (yes, because Vongola is always the priority), and he would send one of his subordinates to summon her to their headquarters. However, this Thursday was an exception. She might have forgotten that the CEDEF needed that contract signed, the fake one being a mining contract employing fifty new ‘miners’ and the terms of said job and the real one, pretty much an employment contract. The silver haired man was needed as he and Sawada Iemitsu have to appraise the new trainee’s capabilities.

 Such includes their fidelity to the family. The CEDEF’s headquarters was near the law firm, but at the rate Celestina was taking the precious time they could have wasted by heading to CEDEF instead of whatever was restraining her.

 Thankfully, one of the partners recognized him and guided him to Celestina’s office. The older man pointed the office where Celestina was talking to two persons whose back were on him. Gokudera thanked the partner, who he recognized as the Cavallone’s lawyer.

 After the older man left, Gokudera headed to Celestina’s office where two persons (the paralegals who assist the two lawyers) headed out in a hurry. He was about to rudely interrupt the conversation but an angered high pitched voice caught him off guard which in turn was retaliated with some cursing.

 “You can’t just get a divorce just because you woke up one morning and realized you hate each other!” Celestina seemingly did not notice Gokudera’s presence despite stopping by the door.

 Gokudera never saw her lose her temper, not until this day. She would simply shake her head at Lambo’s antics even when she claimed that she is losing her temper. She would only sigh whenever one of their men would make a move contrary to what she had instructed them, and try to cover the mess it resulted.

 The couple seemed to pause in their argument.

 “There are certain grounds that you should fulfill, and what you experienced is just a major fight that can be resolved if you just talk in a nice way.” Celestina’s voice calmed a bit, the scowl still present in her face. “You just married two years ago. The divorce you want is with consent, and the law will only grant it if you have been married for three years.”

 Gokudera made a mental note to remind Lambo not to rush in dating women. The couple she was counselling (and holding her back) appeared to be in their 20’s.

 “You can go to other lawyers, and they will either give you the same answer or take all your cash until you reach your third anniversary before any action happens if you approached the wrong people.” Celestina finally glanced at the door, noticing the silver head’s presence. She took her things and placed it in her brief case.

“Look, I know you still have a year before you get to,” Celestina motioned vaguely at the two of them. “Yeah, decide if you really cannot stand each other. To tell you the truth, it will be a very long process. Your two year old child will have to go to the mother, and you will only be given visitation rights. Liquidation of your properties will also be involved in this, and that will be another process entirely.”

She took her brief case and motioned for her secretary to come to the couple. “A year can make a big difference. You can mend your relationship and save your family. If you still want the divorce then you can approach me when the time comes.” She glanced at Hayato apologetically before turning back to the couple.

“If you have more questions, you can approach me anytime I am free. Unfortunately as much as I want to answer your questions, I have to go. Excuse me.” She went out of her office and walked ahead of Gokudera.

 She stopped by the foot of the stairs when she realized he wasn’t following her. She glanced at him, motioning her head that they should go.

 Gokudera rolled his eyes at her, resisting the urge to scowl at the action. He heard the words of the secretary of something about ‘free consultations when it comes to divorce,’ which is honestly one of the violations in their profession (Then again, relatively simulating a contract, not for tax evasion, is also a violation of their profession). It only took him five steps to catch up to her, and they took the stairs going to the parking lot instead of waiting for the elevator. They were really in a tight schedule, and thankfully, the traffic was not a problem at that time of the day.

 They arrived at the parking lot, and boarded his black, sleek car which was polished until it would glare at your eyes when the sun’s rays hit it. “Get in.”

 “Flashy.” Celestina muttered as she got in and fastened her seat belt. The silver head man snorted beside her as he turned on the engine. “May I know why most cars I see being used by the mafia is either a black limousine or a black sports car?”

 Gokudera gave her an amused smirk, and a shrug. Most days, he would be irritated by the bombarding questions people give but he learned that when she asks, the real question is different from what is expressed. He tried to give her this expression, reminiscent of the first time she finally noticed that he was just messing with her by giving shrugs because she seemed content with an answer like that even though she was curious. He thought he was fooling her by answering, and when she was just riding along, he was resisting the urge to laugh. She takes what people give her, and she seemed content, he realized then.

 This gesture meant that she go figure and tell him what she thinks. “I get the limousine part, really. Sports car, yes, in the event of a chase or whatever like escaping enemies. But why does it have to be black?” She turned to him, not accepting that smirk-shrug-go-figure. “It’s not night time, and you can’t exactly escape enemies by glaring them to blindness.” She turned to the side mirror, rolling her eyes at the lack of answer. They reached the valet of the building, and they got out. Gokudera went out of the car, allowing one of the men to park it somewhere.

 “See, what if one of them is the enemy? Your black sport’s car won’t save you from any pain after-” Gokudera slammed the elevator buttons to cut her off.

 “What do you want to do about the valet? Skip him and park the car instead?” Celestina smiled at him and nodded. She glanced at her reflection, frowning at her disheveled hair. “You could have told me that I look like I have saved my pet from a hurricane.” She removed the tie from her bun and hand combed her hair to let her auburn locks free. “Stop looking at my reflection. I look like a girl trying to hide my hang over.” She gave her reflection a smile before wearing her neutral expression.

 Gokudera looked away, crossing his arms on his chest. “Who would look at your stupid reflection?” He muttered. “Weird woman.”

  And yet despite how she could seem to be this refreshing character, who is warm and full of witty remarks and a borderline bully, there would be a hundred and eighty degree turn whenever she’s working. She’s the kind to wear her heart on her sleeves, and yet she could be a cold emotionless person when the need arise.

 Case in point, when she started facing the recruits, read to them the terms of the contract without flinching, stuttering, or yelping at the sight of hardened individuals the Vongola will send to (their death) battles. She studies them with cold neutrality, giving an advice or two for those recruits who slipped and showed her that they are afraid.

 (Sometimes, Gokudera is reminded of Yamamoto, but the baseball idiot’s ledge is way redder than the simple stain on hers. And she has a gentler personality. Once he got to know her, she was easy to read. Her eyes always betray her cool façade.)

 And when they would get in the car and she would pretend to sleep, he was reminded of a person. Gokudera had long gotten over the death of said associate, and he couldn’t even figure why he had remembered. They have opposite personalities when it comes to coping. While his associate tend to voice out his thoughts and displeasure, Celestina would try to sleep hoping everything will be better when she wakes up. 

 (The image of Yamamoto looking down from the roof top came back to him. The tenth following after.)

 “Hey,” The traffic lights turned to red and he stopped the car. He turned to her because this may be what she needed. “I don’t really know what happened with you and that bastard-” The bastard, being Ron, “but if he failed to see just how remarkable you are, it’s his loss.”

 “Thank you.” He heard her say. Gokudera rolled his eyes. He turned to her to poke her head but there was an overflowing sadness in her that just struck him.

 “I have recovered from that.” She sat straight, staring blankly at the road. It was the kind of expression he used to wear when he was reminded of the pianist who has a special place in his heart. It was the kind of silence he experienced before Bianchi revealed everything to him. “The young couple who approached me- the one you saw me giving legal advice- just made me think of things about my life.”

 “You are not that impulsive.” The car stopped in an intersection when the lights turned red. “It comes with being old, it’s normal. Reflecting about life in general after comparing yours to those less fortunate.”

 “No, I’m not. I tend to learn from the experience of people around me.” She laughed lightly but it couldn’t really mask the heavy burden that kept her. “I’ll have to remind you that you are older than me, so are you speaking from experience?”

 Gokudera flicked her forehead but she was able to dodge it. He heard a loud thud from his side, and he could only smile at her cursing the window of his car. “Serves you.”

 “It seems being an old man diminished your patience as well.” Celestina wondered if there will be bump on her head.

 “You’re only two and a half years younger so don’t push it.” Gokudera grumbled, finger tapping the steering wheel as he waited for the lights to turn green. Her eyes travelled to the steering wheel to the watch in Gokudera’s wrist. It was elegant in its simple design, one that surprised her considering the other accessories he wears. The leather strap had seen better days yet he still insists on wearing it.

 At least there’s something in his life he chooses not to replace easily.

 “Anyway, the young couple, I daresay, is far more courageous than I will ever be. They took a risk because they thought that it’s worth it. Both of them were descent enough not to let the other wait and watch as the love leaves one of them. Unlike some of those who come to us.” Yet she longed for something more for everything around her seemed to change. She wondered if that is what his watch feels as it deteriorates in his wrist while everything around it seemed to change.

 Gokudera knew that she was speaking in metaphors. He sympathized with her in that aspect.

 “Mama still accepted my father with open arms after every trysts.” She hasn’t disclosed such information to anyone, and she wondered why she started telling him some of her secrets. “I never understood that. She said it’s because she still loves my father. If ever I was chosen simply because I was needed, I would rather not be chosen at all because once I am no longer needed, they’ll eventually leave.”

 “Have you tried taking a risk?” He asked, because he understood that his father, though a bad father figure, still loves his mother. His mother took the risk of loving someone who couldn’t be with her, and never expected it return. At times, he longed to have that kind of love- the love his mother held for his father, taking a risk without thinking of the consequences- in the many faceless women he brought home. He catches himself before he gets lost to the idea, so he would break whatever he shared with that woman.

 “I have not.”

 “Will you take the risk even when you know you will lose?”

 “Will you?” Celestina held on her seatbelt when the car moved.

 “Hey, I am the one who first asked!” Gokudera only wanted answers, not questions. “But we both know you are not stupid.”

 She giggled. “In certain aspects, yes I am not stupid.” She ran a hand through her auburn locks. “But I know that when the time comes I would love someone, no matter how illogical it would be, I’m sure that I’ll take the risk no matter how many times I say that I won’t.” She turned to Gokudera, smiling at him when he glanced. “I’m stupid that way.”

She placed her hands on her lap as she stared at them.

He glanced at her jagged fingernails. He never really saw those grow properly when she had no nail polish on but the PDA (or meeting with her not ex-boyfriend... ex-crush?) may have agitated her too much. 

"Are your fingers healed though?" Gokudera has to curse himself for sounding like he has some weird fixation on nails. 

The way she scooted every so slightly away from him told him that his fears came to light. 

"That's not what I mean!" He exclaimed, running a hand through his hair. He itched for a smoke at the added stress that one statement caused him. 

Celestina laughed. She finds joy in these small things and he had to wonder how someone who has every thing some would covet be so easily satisfied. "I shan't speak of this to anyone, don't you worry." 

She raised her fingers to her eye level and tried to make out the jagged nails and the closing wounds from the hang nails she picked. Her nail polish failed to prevent her from murdering her fingernails at the beach. "They're as fine as they could be. Poor nails."

"What made you so agitated last time?" Gokudera asked, and she has to raise her brow at his sudden concern for her nail care. "I would like to have less dirt in my car. I'm busy as it is and vacuuming your bloodied nails is not really part of my schedule."

Celestina blanched, her mind going haywire at the effects of her response to her anxiety. She muttered out a lot of sincere "Sorry," "It's my fault but it's a habit she has unconsciously developed" and some incomprehensible stuff. 

Ah, Gokudera really wanted that smoke. 

"Just- don't worry about it." Of course she looked so worried about it, as if she just incurred a lifetime debt. 

"I can always just free an hour of my time for all days as contingency whenever you decide to pick on your nails because you have a lot on your mind." He smirked and she was on the verge of tears. 

She hit him on his shoulders without regard for the courtesy of driver respect and road safety. "You ass! Why didn't you tell me ages ago?!" 

"I was being polite!" He pretended that her hit hurt just so he could not have another one piling on his stress. He did not hide at how he took pleasure in making her flustered. 

"Wow, I'm the luckiest person in the world next to Vongola Decimo then!"

They reached a point of silence after that, each of them catching their breath- Celestina for overthinking on the effects of her nail-picking-habit, and Gokudera for his very nicotine-infested lungs.    

 They arrived at the foot of the building of their law firm. He parked the car and waited for her to collect her things.

When she unbuckled her seatbelt, her grip on the leather tightened. 

"What?" Gokudera asked, glad that she was not biting her tiny nails.  

"The couple we saw passionately PDA-ing" He snorted and she has to let out a laugh even though she was in the verge of tears, "-in the beach last time. It's my father and his latest mistress."

His eyes went wide. He received a smile in return. 

Celestina wondered if he knew that he looked like he would kill someone for her, and honestly, it gave her great relief. That she could tell anyone of what has been weighing her for years. That it was not only her who saw for her father (and her siblings) to accuse her of trying to break their family apart. "I just- it's been going for years. He would go to his own business trip or some problem came up in work. Of course I would be the one who would somehow discover about the farce." 

There's an acceptance in her sigh, and it left an uncomfortable feeling in Gokudera's gut. "I thought that I have been desensitized on this, but then I was really agitated. I'm sorry for the trouble, really. And, and thank you for listening." She looked at him with a grin. She pinched his cheek, the glare on his face really giving her discomfort. The glare he redirected at her made her laugh. 

She thanked him for the ride by giving his arm a gentle squeeze as she smiled warmly at him, and went out of the car.

"Are you- do you hate me?" He asked in a low voice. The bastard of the boss. Bianchi's half-brother. Sorrentino's illegitimate child. 

He wanted to scold her for looking so surprised and confused. 

"I don't." Celestina answered without even hesitating. "You have the decency not to tie down anyone while engaging in things you promised them not to. Trust me, you are far kinder than the men I have come across in my life, thus far." As a jest, she patted his head. "And far too cute."

"Is that you attempt at flirting?"

She laughed.  

The passenger door closed, and Gokudera watched as she disappeared from the building. There was the ghost of her touch, his arm still feeling the comforting warmth she left him with.

 He scolded himself, for some reason, about being distracted and to simply focus on his job.

 When he arrived to the meeting area to prepare the necessary materials the tenth would need, he paused just to touch his arm where Celestina had touched a few hours ago. Then, Gokudera continued with his task, the back of his mind having some hope that he would chance upon her in the University where they are teaching.

Chapter Text

She grew up in a small hometown where there are rich greens everywhere. Every month, she would come home and enjoy a mini reunion with her family. Her siblings would be there, bringing with them the family they have created. Her parents would prepare a feast, their rooms already prepared for them to stay over the weekend. She’s always the last to arrive, always being held up by work that she’s too tired to drive to the countryside the night before. She would drive in the early hours and bring some sweet wines (for the adults) and a whole cake to be enjoyed by everyone for lunch.

Her mother and her father, despite their aching joints, would be the first ones to greet her. She would kiss and hug her mother tightly, pulling away to give her father a peck on the cheek. She would return to her mother and embrace her.

Her niece and nephews would run to her, giving her a warm hug. The oldest would take the cake and announce the flavor of the month once inside the house.

Celestina always holds her mother’s hand as they walked towards the house where her parents decided to retire. This was her first investment. She bought a house with one master bedroom, four bedrooms, and two maid quarters. It has a backyard where her father would plant some fruits and vegetables. There is enough room for the children to play and experience campfire with their cousins, and an area for barbeque for the adults.

Her mother never wanted a big house, but she decided that since they would be visiting every month, this would be just fitting.

Celestina noticed her brother-in-law started dying his hair to hide the gray ones that will reveal his age.

Her elder sister gets tired more easily, and the corner of her eyes had added lines.

Her younger brother is becoming more of a man in her eyes as she sees him arranging the tables and chairs, and assisting his wife in the kitchen. Her sister-in-law’s belly was starting to show despite the loose dress she wore.

Celestina took the cup of hot chocolate her sister handed to her gratefully. “You’re slowly getting mama’s recipe for this one, Grethel.” The marshmallows were starting to melt with the drink, until only one remained.

Her niece, the youngest one, turned six last week. The younger one was pulling her aunt to the table for breakfast.

Celestina was surprised that little Malta is almost at her hip level.

Her two nephews, one around ten and the other thirteen, will outgrow her soon. She remembered helping her elder sister take care of them when they were babies. Celestina was in her late teens then. After her elder sister’s marriage, she was the next one to be responsible for the household when her parents are busy for work. Then her sister delivered the first son, Nicholas. Her mother decided to let her father handle the business so she could watch their grandson. Celestina helps her mother whenever their maid was busy with the chores.

Time seems to tick fast as she observed the occupants of the dining table. Celestina could hear the subtle changes in Nicholas’ voice, or how Gregor is starting to lose interest in the toy cars and instead prefers the games installed on his mother’s iPad. Malta won her violin recital, and the girl’s soft hands are now calloused- one her mother would frown at.

Celestina smiled as she remembered how her mother never wanted her to have cuts or any marks on her bare skin.  Her father seemed more talkative than usual, always asking for her mother’s opinion after some anecdotes. Her mother will give a thrift response. This brought a frown on her face.

She chewed the pancake slowly, losing appetite despite her brother’s proud (and insistence) that they all get a taste of his wife’s homemade pancakes. She couldn’t taste the maple syrup nor the sweet and soft pancake anymore as she noticed the dark circles under her mother’s eyes and the forced laughter and cheer from their matriarch.

She brought the tea cup to her lips to hide the frown on her face. There are two things that remained a constant in her life for the past thirty years: one, Celestina had never brought home a man she has intimate relations with; and two, her mother cannot let go of a man who loves her but needs another’s embrace to feel like a man.

Sometimes, she wondered if her siblings ever noticed the things that made a rift in the happy marriage of her parents.

But then again, they have brought home the family they created respectively (briefly, she wondered if they just got over that fear). Celestina stayed in the comfort of her career.

It wouldn’t work, really. Celestina could be the one who would say one thing and mean another, leaving the other person broken and tired. But she never really liked her father’s ways (and yet, at times she could see him in her- in her mannerisms, in her desire to be praised for her work, in her impulsiveness).

Or worse, she could be like her mother, too eager to offer anything to the people she loves even letting them be angry at her for showing them her empty hands.

She excused herself after breakfast for a short nap. She looked tired so whatever protests her father had, had died down.

She woke up to the sound of her nephews mashing some freshly picked berries for a jam. When she emerged from her room, her sister-in-law was resting on the sofa of the living room, hands on her protruding belly.

“Auntie, why is Aunt Vivian not feeling well?” Nicholas paused from his mashing to ask the question he had been itching to ask. Their parents will not give them a candid answer, and he never got the chance with their grandparents for they were offered with food last night.

Celestina saw her brother glance at her with amusement. “Your aunt is pregnant. Pregnancy does that to women carrying a child.” She sat across the boys and watched them work.

“Why don’t you have children, Auntie Tina?” Malta, who has been covered by her uncle appeared which surprised Celestina. The front of Malta’s dress soaked from washing the dishes but the child seemed to be so happy.

Celestina shook her head at her brother as she rose. “Malta will get sick, Dante!” She grabbed a towel, beckoning her niece to come to her. She crouched to wipe the front clothes, and the little girl’s wet skin.

“It’s because Auntie Tina doesn’t have a boyfriend!” Dante drawled as he continued washing the dishes.

Nicholas and Gregor let out choking sounds at the thought of relationships.

Celestina snorted.

“Auntie, why don’t we have an uncle with you?” Malta knitted her brows as she tilted her head to the side.

Dante cackled loudly, earning him a glare. 

“Yeah, auntie why don’t you have a husband?” Gregor backed up his sister, getting bored from mashing a bucket of berries for the past hour.

“And why are you not mashing the berries?” Celestina gave them a pointed look, and the boys knew better than to push questions further. They have seen the horror of their aunt’s wrath when they were younger.

Malta pouted at the lack of answer. “Auntie!” She whined.

Before Celestina could answer, Dante interjected. “Because Auntie is sooo busy with work.”

“But mommy and daddy are also busy with work!” Malta keenly observed.

Celestina resisted the urge to roll her eyes in front of the children. They do not need to see such misbehavior for them to imitate. “Sweetheart, if I go date men and have a husband, I won’t be able to play with you and your brothers or bring you sweets and anything you like whenever I felt like it.” She pinched the little girl’s nose, before drowning her face with kisses.

Gregor rolled his eyes. “But how are children created auntie?”

Nicholas blanched while Dante laughed breathlessly.

Celestina heaved a sigh. “I do not know dear, I’m not the one with children. Ask your parents, or better yet-”

Dante stopped laughing finally. He knew that smirk, and he couldn’t help but grip on the plate tightly as he gulped down the regret rising from his throat.

“-go ask your uncle Dante, he’s the one who got Auntie Vi pregnant.” Celestina rose, smiling triumphantly at her younger brother who was now being bombarded with questions from Gregor. “Come now, Malta, let’s get you changed.”

O~O~O

Gokudera just finished giving his report to Tsuna after he had dealt with the small group extorting money in the area. He was about to leave the room to call it a night when Tsuna called him, a bit fidgety and worried.

“Your father- ah- Sorrentino came here this morning demanding some share with the business you handle.” Tsuna let go of his clenched fists after finally dropping the information.

He has deliberately hidden the fact that the head of the Sorrentino barged in the manor when Tsuna was having breakfast with his daughter and Kyoko. Of course, he extended his hospitality to their allies and instructed the maids to serve him breakfast.

“He said that it’s fitting that he, as an ally, would have to share with the business in the surface world. There’s something worrisome about that demand so I was planning on giving you more responsibility.” Tsuna already has an action plan. He didn’t want to exploit his right hand man’s connection with the family but drastic measures must be taken.

Gokudera, the ever so loyal friend, gave him a smile as he turned away from the door and back to the center of the study. “What do you want me to do?”

Tsuna found his oak table interesting. “Are you ready to face your father again, Hayato? I mean I know that you had talked sometime after we took over, but it’s a bit-” Tsuna’s hands were gesturing at the air. “-Yeah. Bianchi told me that she would stay with Reborn- so that means with the Vongola- and she’s really not welcoming with your father this morning. This task will take long, and I am sure it will be painful for you.” Finally, he looked at the silver haired bomber who always looked after his well-being.

“I’m ready to do anything for you, Tsuna.” Gokudera’s resolve was reflected in his eyes. It echoed in his voice and it stood firm with him. “This is the family I have found, the family I intend to protect.” It was the family who accepted him and made him a better person. 

After Tsuna told him of his task, Gokudera left the manor.

He needed to drink a glass of something hard to ease those demons like he usually does. Sometimes, he would find a willing woman that he would bring in one of his many apartments in the city. He would kick her out in the morning, making it clear that this wouldn’t happen again. He would smoke a pack in his balcony, watching the fleeting clouds in the sky. A routine like this is better for him. He won’t have anyone hurt just like how his father broke his wife, and his mother.

But tonight, he found himself driving to a particular house, craving her companionship. He had no intention of bedding her, like the many faceless women he turned to for some momentary comfort. She deserved more than that.

It was odd, really, how they grew close. Both of them enjoyed the solace isolation brings to a person. When he talked about how the business would cover the other trade, she would nod in understanding. She could be easily read so he knows when she is having second thoughts. When he speaks his mind, she would indulge him by listening and goading him to tell her more.

At times, he wonders if she has not really seen the horrors of their world. She never showed fear whenever the mafia side of the Vongola is brought up. When they talk, she would look at him as the Hayato he had presented himself, and not whatever title or rumors she heard.

Tonight he craved to forget that he has a past weighing him, defining him in the eyes of people who knew. He craved to forget that he is the right hand man of the Vongola boss.

He noticed that the lights were not turned on. He fished out his phone with his free hand and dialed a number. His grip on the bottle of Grappa tightened.

O~O~O

Celestina watched the bonfire dance in the middle of their backyard. The children were singing some nice songs while the adults were already bringing out the dessert wine.

Technology is not allowed whenever they are bonding with each other but the rule never applied to Celestina. Her work may require her expertise at any time so she always kept her phone with her in case some emergency comes up.

When she felt her phone vibrate inside her pocket, she paused from singing and stood from the ground. “Dante!” She pointed at her now vacant spot so her younger brother would entertain the children.

Dante couldn’t really do anything other than relent, even though he wanted to protest. Before she could go inside the house to have a clearer conversation with the caller, he held her arm and waited for her to answer the call. Once she swiped the green button, Dante wasted no time to carry out his plan. “Mama! Papa! Tina’s boyfriend is calling her!”

“Oh my god!” Celestina pulled away from Dante and punched his shoulder to retaliate. The chuckle she heard from the other line only made her blush. Thankfully the area was not that well-lit. The children smiling at her and chorusing an “ooohhhh” was not helping her case. “Dante is lying! This is work.” She slid open the glass panel and stepped inside as she muttered an apology to the caller.

“Yeah, work! Is he the one you’re doing every night?” Dante rubbed his shoulder to ease the pain. “Look! She’s hiding her boyfriend!”

“Can you hold for just a minute?” Celestina addressed the caller with a sweet voice. She covered the bottom part of her phone, giving a nasty glare at Dante. “I will make sure that your child will be ashamed of having you as a father.” She didn’t wait for her younger brother’s response as she closed the glass panel. She removed her hand covering the lower part of her phone and muttered apologies as she headed to her room and locked the door.

“Is there something wrong? I am in the countryside right now but if you guys need me, I can drive there immediately.” Celestina wondered if she looked presentable right then and there. She sat in front of her vanity mirror, finger combing her hair with her free hand.

“I am at your front door.” She heard some shuffling from the other line. Gokudera sighed, “Such a shame! I kind of missed your company.”

Celestina fidgeted on her seat, a smile slowly forming on her lips. “If we see each other every day, we’ll get bored of each other. Think of it this way, me being away from you will just make you miss me more, yeah?” She heard him drinking before he let out a snort at her words. “Hayato, is something bothering you?”

“I just remembered that you once told me the strongest drink you ever had was some Moscow mule.” From his end, Gokudera expected that he would spend the rest of the night in her house. They would drink a fine Grappa, one that he selected from his collection especially for her knowing that this would suit her taste (and alcohol tolerance), as they talk about random things that came up in the conversation. “I have an aged Grappa with me and I would like to share with you. You can have as many shots as you want, and I won’t judge you.”

“You decided that we can afford to be drunk when tomorrow is a work day?” Celestina wondered if this is what she had missed as a teenager. Back in middle school, her classmates would share stories of talking with some boys for hours. They would squeal in delight, and they would discuss if the guy was really into them. She never paid attention to those things, too caught up with making sure her grades remained at the top of the batch. She may not be smart but she could prove that she is not just a pretty face. “I told you, I am a sleepy drunk. I might sleep halfway our drinking session and you’d regret going to me in hopes of having a drinking buddy.”

“Not really. You forgot that tomorrow is a holiday.” Gokudera laughed lightly. “Tonight is the best night to get drunk. We can share our anecdotes on how we failed as a human being.”

Celestina wouldn’t really trust him yet. She couldn’t really tell him how she wouldn’t want to be like her mother or how she developed her trust issues. “Hayato, are you sober enough to drive home?” Most of all, she worried that he might have treated this phone call as a replacement of her actual presence and went ahead and drunk half the contents of the Grappa.

“See, you’re scared of losing control. What’s life without a little risk?”

“Ah, but you’re not one to actually let other people see you lose control.”

“You’re not a loose mouth. Are you scared of losing control in front of me?”

Celestina stared at her reflection for a moment. Control is something she prides herself. She was able to control herself from screaming when a man exploded in front of her. She was able to control herself from resigning after learning that her mentor wanted her to succeed his mafia clients. She was able to control herself from breaking her friendship with her friends when they told Ron her feelings only to be rejected. She was able to control herself from wanting more what people could offer and inevitably accepted the fact that she’s not really anyone’s first choice. She was able to control herself from breaking bonds with her father when she first caught him flirting with another woman.

Most of the time, she was able to control herself from wanting to change her mundane lonesome life. She willed herself to be content with what she has, never wanting more because this is better than the bitter taste of disappointment.

“Hayato, we both know we fear losing control.” It is similar with him, she thought. Most of the girls she saw him dating ended up crying the next day if they had not understood that their passionate night filled with alcohol induced attraction would fade when the sun rises in the morning. If the woman had lasted more than a month but less than three, their romance would fade and the woman would end up in tears. It was the sight that greeted for the past months she had worked with the Vongola, and she never brought it up.

Honestly, she admitted at some point that he was more honest with her in some things than with the women he ended up calling his girlfriend. But that honesty comes with business, because she has to know details of the trade in order to come up with a perfect appearance of legality.

Celestina shook her head, scolding herself for even treating this phone call like the ones her classmates would talk about during their breaks back in middle school. “Control over our emotions is what makes us good in our field.”

“Yeah, and it’s that fear that shows in your eyes whenever someone asks you out on a date. Why are you so scared woman?”

“I’ll answer that if you can answer me why you wouldn’t stay in love with your so called girlfriend who you would throw away once you got tired of them.”

Gokudera hang up.

Celestina wondered if the tightening of her chest was a valid response of her body. She fears that if she loses control, she might admit that she finds him attractive. She fears that if she tells him that she feels so strongly, he would treat her like those women.

‘It’s better this way,’ she thought as she put on a smile. Her reflection from the vanity did not convince her so she adjusted the smile a little. When she emerged from the house, she joined the children in another round of bonfire songs and games.

When the children are asleep, she politely declined her siblings’ invitation to drink some Grappa they have brought. They understood for she will leave their home in the morning to return to the city to work despite the holiday.

She closed the door of her room, and lied in bed with the ‘what ifs’ keeping her company.

O~O~O

Gokudera got back in his apartment, placing the bottle of Grappa back in the shelf of his bar. He ran a hand through his locks, convincing himself to forget Celestina for the night. He glanced at his watch and found that it was too early for him to sleep.

He wondered if she blamed herself after he hang up on her. He opened the can of worms so he couldn’t blame her when she responded with some bite.

He left his apartment again and drove to the bar he frequented. He found a red haired woman who seemed to be interested in him, brought her home and allowed the illusion to cover his reality for a while.

When they met the next week after the holidays, Gokudera perfectly timed his actions. He found some girl in the bar. She is a British National working as an accountant in an international bank within Italy. She visited him during work in the construction firm.

Gokudera never cared about this woman’s hope in a relationship. She would soon be a forgotten fling after she realized that he is not really into her. The romance will fade sooner or later and he will leave another woman heartbroken, asking him things that he cannot answer. 

When Celestina reported in his office, the files of the permit she obtained from the local courts at hand to be turned over to the executive, she found him in his office a bit occupied with a red head.

They were currently preoccupied, only aware of each other’s presence. She was already on his desk, pulling Gokudera closer to her being as they shared a passionate kiss.

They didn’t notice her presence. It was to her advantage.

Celestina clutched the folders tightly, leaving the room soundlessly. She looked away when the secretary gave her a questioning look.

Her lack of company in the elevator gave her a chance to place a hand on her face, willing the tears to go back where they came from. It was irrational and immature of her to feel this way after all.

“Gosh, I want to go home.” She whispered softly. She wished that time, for once, to actually stop and give her time to collect herself.

When she reached her office, she sent a message to Gokudera informing him that she has sent the important papers to his secretary.

She received a call. She never bothered sending some sort of excuse for ignoring it. Instead, she asked her secretary to lead the clients requesting for her to her office as she placed her phone inside her drawer to get to her other important work.

There’s not much work to do for the Vongola’s businesses during this week after all.  They are just one client in her pile of increasing pile of cases for litigation. It seems that being a counsel for one of the big industries (dominated by the mafia families) makes a lawyer in demand.

After her three o’clock appointment was done, she got an early off and went home. She didn’t teach that day, giving an excuse of having eaten a bread with cinnamon in it on her way.

She replied to Gokudera’s message of a polite ‘thank you’ with a polite message of her own before she went to sleep even when the sun was only setting.

She woke up around nine in the evening with a grumbling stomach. The annoying sound of her doorbell compelled her to get up. Her hunger will not stop her from going back to sleep for there’s not much to eat besides the biscuits she stocked and some instant noodles. She wore her cardigan and answered the door. She would have gasped at the sight of Gokudera, his bandaged hand presenting to her some take out from a Chinese restaurant had it not for the embarrassing sound her stomach produced. She scowled at her belly like a mother when her child misbehaved.

Gokudera rolled his eyes. “Who do you think you should blame, idiot?” She stepped aside to allow him passage. When they are not eating outside and when they have no scheduled appointments, they would dine together. Either of them would ask the other out after a day of working together, or whenever they meet each other in the University grounds.

Gokudera is a common visitor in this abode, especially when he would pick her up to go to some place regarding the ‘trade.’ Most of the time, he would also give her a ride home. When they got sick of eating restaurant food, Gokudera would offer to cook dinner in her apartment because it is more convenient, he says.

At times, he would bring her to one of the houses he owns but most of them are not fully furnished. She understood what he meant by ‘more convenient’ when they found that his apartment would lack some essential furniture like the dining table and chairs, or a sofa. She was more surprised that he was surprised that he lacks some things. It’s not like he cannot afford, it’s just that he has no time to redecorate.

“I heard you had an allergy attack.” He placed the paper bag on the table and proceeded setting them.

Celestina took two glasses and a pitcher of water. She checked her refrigerator for some juice, but what she have will be rejected by Gokudera. “Yeah, it took me three pills of anti-histamine to alleviate the itchiness. It’s sad really.” She placed the glasses and pitcher on the table, hoping that he will not see through the lie. Usually, she wouldn’t be woken up by any loud noise after drinking that much meds for her allergies. “What do you want to drink?”

“Water’s fine. I have a busy day tomorrow. I imagine yours will be.”

Celestina sat across Gokudera, taking the plastic spork grudgingly. He forgot declining the single-use plastic again. “That’s another sad thing, I think.” She watched him curiously through the gaps of her plastic spork. “I’m sorry for the trouble.”

Gokudera shook his head. “I’ll pass by your place going to the Vongola manor. We both know that you couldn’t cook-” She pouted. “-and might as well have dinner with a person who doesn’t annoy me.”

“I annoy you. Especially when you heard my stomach moments ago.” Celestina indulged on the oriental flavor.

“Does not annoy me that much.” He corrected, resisting the urge to actually flick her forehead.

They ate in comfortable silence afterwards.

Celestina eyed his bandaged hand and wondered what happened. She wouldn’t bother asking because she knew that he will only tell her about some generic excuse about some construction accident. Still, carrying such weight, as light as it seems, will be very heavy for an injured hand. She hadn’t notice that injury when she accidentally caught him with his latest woman that morning.

She should have really bothered asserting herself in learning cooking instead of taking the chore her siblings hated to do. Perhaps if she went to a University far from her hometown, she would have learned cooking because most men wants a woman who can make meals for them.

She suddenly lost her hunger, stabbing the vegetables with her single-use plastic instead.

Gokudera seemed to notice her dampened mood. He should have used his other hand to eat instead of the bandaged one. “This is just some minor accident-”

Celestina looked away, a smile making its way on her face like she usually does when she hears that generic excuse. She shouldn’t have expected him to tell him the truth. A year of working with them is not really a good reason for them to give her information that is not related to her work.

“- I got when I was testing the new recruits’ combat abilities this afternoon.” He grimaced at the memory of how he miscalculated that brat’s strength after he taunted the newbie. “The doctor said that it wouldn’t be a problem if I don’t overdo it.” He waited for her to ask him that he give her a clear definition of the activities he shouldn’t be doing but he was confused at the surprised look she was giving him. “What?”

Her lips slowly formed a smile, her eyes glinting under the dimmed lights of the dining area. She has this excited glimmer in her expression that he couldn’t quite understand but he knew she was indescribably happy. That kind of happiness she exhibited was reminiscent of the time she couldn’t contain her composure the first time Reborn complimented her for having seen through another family’s motives.

“What?” Gokudera groaned as he ran a hand through his hair.

“I reckon that the new recruit is either just strong with his combat abilities or he employed a dirty trick.” Celestina couldn’t even push him with her full force when his guard is down.

He went on explaining some judo trick that was employed to him and some physics aspect in the human body. Celestina pretended to understand the things he was telling her as she finished the remaining portion of her food.

After they finished the meal, Celestina threw the take-out boxes. She placed the glasses and the sporks in the sink to be washed after sending him off.

“I can’t believe you will make me feel guilty about forgetting to refuse those sporks.” Gokudera grumbled as they walk out of the house, placing his hands in his pocket.

“Nessie got extinct because she ate too many plastic.” She knew that there are other factors that biologists proposed on why the Loch Ness monster couldn’t have lived, like the size of the lake wouldn’t sustain them but Gokudera firmly believes it still exists. He opened his mouth to protest but she was quicker in cutting him off. “And I can’t believe a man who owns various apartments around town would rather drive two hours to sleep in a nice bedroom.”

“I told you I have no time.” He fished his keys out, pressing a button to open his car. “You don’t have to walk me to my car, Celestina.”

“Oh, I have to. What if they take advantage of your injury?” She stopped when they reached his newly purchased car. It was a black shiny sports car.

“I’m not the one who excused herself from work due to some food.” Gokudera opened the front door, and went inside. He opened the window, eyes narrowed at her. “You better show up healthy for work tomorrow. We need you getting our man out of prison.”

“I will be.” Celestina assured him. She watched him sped off until his vehicle was out of sight. As she walked back to her house, she found that she’s contented with how things are with Gokudera.

It took her two weeks before she had stopped hoping that she wouldn’t catch him with a random woman he wouldn’t bother getting to know after one night and another month for her to get used to actually being contented with what he could give her. 

Chapter Text

Lambo found refuge in the manor’s library whenever he wanted to be left alone. By that it meant he is escaping people that will hold him accountable for his actions. He learned that no one would look for him in the library during his teenage years. When he didn’t want to attend a particular class, he would hide in one of the aisle to remain hidden. Sometimes, he hated having this reputation because it tends to surprise people when he blurts out some facts he had read during his asylum to pass time. It went on until he has a different set of people escaping from. From the tutors it became the head butler after breaking some valuable accessory, or Haru and Kyoko because he never learned taking initiative in household chores.  

But this particular day, he wasn’t escaping any of the aforementioned persons. He was escaping Gokudera’s wrath. Even the library is not a safe refuge. The silver haired Mafioso is clever and cautious. He will not leave any corner untouched when pursuing someone. If he discovers Lambo hiding in the library, people will know.

Then, he saw his escape in a form of a vehicle. He didn’t really care where it would take him, but he knew that vehicle to be one of Gokudera’s.

He entered the vehicle, startling all the occupants.

Lambo saw Gokudera heading to the direction of the vehicle they were all in. “Drive!” He shouted.

The driver, a newbie within the ranks of the Storm Guardian, couldn’t really think straight and rational like his superior. He never expected that his first day in this job, he would have to face the lightning guardian’s panicked cries.

Before Gokudera could reach the front door, he heard the screeching tires of a speeding vehicle. His left hand fanned away the dust the vehicle left in its wake, wrist bare of the only accessory he places on it.

Lambo settled comfortably, finally away from the raging storm guardian who happens to be his mentor in some field. When he realized that Stefano was the one sitting at the front seat, already dialing his superior, Lambo had to act accordingly.

“Don’t you dare!”

“Mr. Hayato has to be informed especially when-”

Stefano and Lambo, despite their graceful training and subtle techniques both learned from Gokudera, can be likened to children fighting over one toy in the sand box. For some reason, Lambo was triumphant in snatching Stefano’s phone.

Lambo was displaying his victory to Stefano, laughing at the loss of the other like any mature adult would do when winning.

“Bring that back, Lambo! We are in a-”

“So you’re Lambo!” The feminine voice brought Lambo back to the situation he was in. He sort of hitched a ride with the outgoing vehicle without knowing the details. It could be worse like an ally family’s representative. 

Lambo immediately turned to Stefano for answers. The slightly older man rolled his eyes at the Lightning brat. “We are escorting Miss Milano back to her office after Decimo had asked her to help.” Stefano turned to Celestina with an apologetic look. “This is Lambo, Vongola tenth’s lightning guardian.”

Celestina gave Lambo a warm smile. Lambo’s stare was making her uncomfortable so she looked at the scenery outside.

“Say,” Lambo inched closer, making Celestina lean slightly towards the window. He chanced upon her entering Gokudera’s study when he returned from his mission. It bugged him that she was never kicked out the moment she opened the door. “Mr. Hayato doesn’t allow anyone in his study.”

Celestina looked to Stefano for help. She doesn’t really understand the context of the statement.

“How’d you seduce him to have access or even get inside the premises of the Vongola manor?” The youngest Vongola guardian has knowledge of the silver head’s trysts. Gokudera was descent enough not to openly show this behavior to them, keeping the women away from his real work. Lambo understood that Gokudera was ashamed. It’s not surprising really because he knows that Gokudera feels guilty for disrespecting the women he never bothered learning the name, and for disrespecting his own self.

However, Lambo would sometimes bother Gokudera in the Construction firm or in one of his apartments in the city for some food or money when he runs out. At times, he would catch Gokudera being roughly intimate with a woman similar to those considered by pop culture as the standard beauty despite the apartment’s lack of proper furniture for such acts.

Gokudera would stop whatever progress he has with the woman and grudgingly ask Lambo’s intention for the unexpected visit. Most of the time, Lambo would be a stuttering apologetic mess, so unlike the tactless and carefree youth he is. Gokudera would chide him, serve him food and grape juice if his apartment has some cupboard or refrigerator for storing such, not minding the fact that he actually has a date. At times, the planned activities for the night would be cancelled. The woman shall be kicked out of the apartment (or office) and Gokudera would give Lambo a ride back to the Vongola manor, grumpy and irritated.

The woman is always different with every visit, but they were all beautiful and confident with enough self-respect. One who is not insecure and knows when to walk away for self-preservation.

So unlike the Mr. Hayato he grew up with.

Stefano intervened too late. “She’s the family’s counsel, Celestina Milano. Decimo sometimes ask for advice in some matters he handles but most of the time she works with Mr. Gokudera for the normal business.”

Lambo leaned against the backrest, a foot against the driver’s seat. He placed his hands behind his head, closing his eyes for show. “Well, figures. You’re too plain for Mr. Hayato to bed.” He opened one eye to gauge her reaction. If Gokudera hears his tactless attitude towards their lawyer, he will never hear the end of it, so Lambo added, “You seem to be better than the rest of them, though. He won’t let any woman in his work if they are not intelligent.” She may have a beautiful face but it lacks color. Powder and lipstick alone won’t really get any man’s attention.

Celestina shook her head at Stefano who was about to admonish him. “I am not kicking you out, Lambo. You don’t have to compliment me.” Her face brightened up exponentially throughout the ride despite the unexpected hitch hiker. 

As always, Stefano dropped her off at the front of their building. Lambo also got off, ignoring Stefano’s demands for his phone in favor of stretching his body. Celestina thanked her aides, and asked them to send her thanks to Gokudera as well.

The vehicle sped off, no doubt Stefano scolding the newbie about following orders of another guardian.

Celestina thought that the car ride was the last she would see Lambo, but he followed her around like a puppy she had picked. When she entered her office, he also entered the office and found himself plopping comfortably on one of the couches for the clients. She was looking at him curiously.

“I was running away from Mr. Hayato.” Lambo heard a chuckle. He watched her head to her desk and check the mails she received. “I forgot to bring money, and I am hungry.” At least her office does not smell like cigarette and gunpowder (lately, the smell lessened in Gokudera’s office), and the noise outside is bearable, dissolving into a white noise Lambo deemed optimal for his sleep. There’s a little decoration- vases, and some certificates and awards she had garnered for the past years- in her office. There are old and new books lining the shelves, folders organized in another. It was as if Lambo was in a cleaner version of Gokudera’s office.

Celestina laughed. “Yeah, he really has no patience for you even when you are a twenty-year old snotty brat.” He almost fell upon hearing the endearment. At least Gokudera didn’t call refer to Lambo as the ‘idiot cow’ because that would take too much explaining and more embarrassing. “I don’t have scheduled clients for today. Would you be willing to wait for an hour before we go out for a meal?” She opened the laptop and started.

Lambo watched her work from where he lied. “You and Stupi-dera can get along, always engrossed with paper work.” He has been in Haru’s office, a corner dedicated for some personal sentiments. This office is lacking the personal touch of the occupant, as if she doesn’t belong in this place.

Similarly, Lambo recalled that Tsuna was adding a picture frame of his daughter’s first day of school in his study, next to the picture of him and his wife in their third anniversary. He would gaze upon it before he starts his day as a Vongola boss. Yamamoto’s workplace has his baseball bat and jersey in a glass casing, the memory of his dreams and ambitions still preserved but he never regretted choosing the sword and fighting for the family. Ryohei was the same.

“Let’s play a game.” It wasn’t a request but a command. “Since when have you been working for Tsuna?” He started the game. Lawyers love questions and answer after all.

“More than a year.”

Lambo waited for her to ask. He explained the rules of twenty questions to her. She merely shrugged and did not ask.

“How’d they come across you?”

“My mentor.”

“What family are you from?”

“Not part of the mafia, or associated with them.”

Lambo’s eyes narrowed. They wouldn’t be careless. “How come you are working for the Vongola?”

“My mentor suggested me to your superiors.”

Lambo waited for her own questions, but she didn’t throw any at him. “How can we be sure you have not sold our secrets yet?”

“Well, you are here talking to me. Unless, of course, I am a fragment of your imagination.”

“Have you met Reborn?”

“Yes. Such a lovely child, so wise and skilled beyond his age.” Lambo raised a brow at her so she continued, “Sometimes, I do not look in his eyes. Those dark orbs will destroy you if he hadn’t done it physically yet.”

Yeah, she did meet Reborn. “It’s your turn to ask questions, Ms. Lawyer.” She’s all right, Lambo deemed.  Although, he wished that she had kicked him out instead of ignoring him when talking to him is not necessary.

“Are you an only child, Ms. Lawyer?” Lambo asked, gazing at the woman from the corner of his eyes. She has this habit of biting her thumb when she’s stuck with something.

She turned her attention to the younger man, noting how he felt very comfortable in her space. “I am offering you asylum from Hayato. You don’t have to pretend you are interested in me, dear.” She almost laughed at his paling face.

“But I am bored.” He whined.

“Go outside. There’s a lot of people who would want to have a break. Sally might enjoy your company.”

Sally is currently busy talking with someone in the phone while typing on her computer. The others who are not busy with something were reading and chatting among their group. The young man decided a monologue would be better than going outside.

Lambo never got the answer he wanted. At least, she has not yelled at him to go out unlike Mr. Hayato. “Ms. Lawyer, you are supposed to play.” He decided to snoop around the office for something more interesting. He purposely made some noises, dropping some books here and there, and disarranging the folders uniformly organized.

Then, he opened some drawers containing old notebooks, a set of worn out leather cover of a planner, and some old cases filled with pens and pencils. The old notebooks were her handwritten notes on her subjects when she was still a student. The worn out leather covered planners took his interest. The pages contain either some verses she had composed or a watercolor art.

Lambo glanced at the woman (who has not ratted out his location to Mr. Hayato yet). People keep things that they treasure hidden from anyone’s view. Hanging picture frames of one’s memories are a reminder for oneself and for anyone that the captured moment is something they cherish. Most of them in the Vongola manor has some personal trinket to remind them of their roots.

Celestina did not look up from her paperwork, not until an hour later after she finished whatever she typing.

“Ms. Lawyer, why don’t you have anything that gives us an idea of who you are in your office like Mr. Hayato?”

“I can’t speak for Hayato. You should ask him why.” Celestina couldn’t really answer the younger man’s question. Looking at photographs makes her a little wistful. Family photos makes her a little bit uncomfortable and angry at every one present. Pictures with her friends are usually found in her social media. Her graduation photos are displayed in the wall above the fireplace in their family house.

The office she has gave her comfort. She won’t think of her personal problems when there is no reminder of it (like how she doesn’t place any photographs in her new place), only the problem of the people who comes to her to fix or at least alleviate their problems.

Her mentor’s office used to have the latest family portrait. Beside it are little frames of his children and grandchildren. Campella’s office has little photographs but he keeps a shelf of souvenirs and gifts from his clients. The lobby and waiting area is warmer than her office. The secretaries are always welcoming guests, always filled with energy and sympathy to anyone who comes.

Her office is bare, and cold compared to the warm and jovial atmosphere the outside provides. This has always been her. A winter landscape that people would only enjoy when they feel like going outside the snow to make snowman and snow angels. “Perhaps, this is me.” She softly whispered.

Lambo raised a brow at her answer. He gazed at the page where she painted a relaxing autumn morning. The scene is from a balcony, the maple leaves fluttering in the air as the sun is rising between two mountains. Most of the subjects of her art is autumn, sunsets, and the night sky.

“Why are you running away from Hayato, anyway?” She saw him winced at the question. You asked for it. She thought, resisting the urge to point out that he wanted her to play this game.

“I went inside his room in the mansion because he writes in codes.” Lambo wondered what she was arranging in her office since it was already organized. But then again he did made a mess.

“Invading his privacy then?” She hummed, masking the accusing tone that usually accompanies that comment.

“I was looking for the notebook he has kept from his middle school years, the G-code originated from there.” Lambo defended, throwing his hands in the air in exasperation.

Celestina turned to him, laughing. “You have to convince me better. Have you seen his study? I tried arranging his things for a week because it bothers me, but I eventually gave up.”

“It’s the truth!” Lambo got up exasperated. “His room in the mansion is surprisingly organized. He keeps some his things in the drawer of his vanity, like how you keep some personal items that should have been thrown away in your office.” He presented the worn out leather cover of her watercolor artworks.

“I’m not him.”

“You share a lot of similarities, like getting on my nerves.” Lambo bluntly stated, a headache threatening to erupt from his senses. “Anyway, I was looking for his notebook to decipher some of his notes. I broke the worn out watch he wears. He could just buy another one, for heaven’s sake.”

She finally took her purse and coat. “He loves that watch. The leather strap seems worn out but that can be replaced. He just have no time to fix it.” She flicked his forehead, one that he is quite accustomed to receiving from Gokudera since he became a teenager (it was better than a hit in the head or a dynamite). “For the record, how can you even destroy Tour de I’lle? I don’t even want to touch it because that costs more than a Ferrari.”

“How’d you know it’s his favorite?” Lambo rubbed his forehead, following Celestina outside her office.

“He has a handsome pay check. He would throw away a stained suit without a moment’s hesitation but he kept that watch for years.” Celestina simply answered, searching for the nearest restaurant in the area with her phone. She pressed the button of the elevator. Lambo stood beside her, examining her from the faint reflection of the elevator. “Also, we don’t share similarities.”

“You do!” Lambo drawled out. They entered the elevator, glad that they don’t have to share it with anyone. “You have this organized chaotic mess in your office. You don’t like anyone looking into your files. Your heart pumps coffee. You both are passionate in things so uncharacteristic of you. And-”

The elevator doors opened. Celestina went ahead to accept the call she received from her boss not bothering to excuse herself for it might be urgent.

Lambo got off the elevator and stood a few meters behind her. “He allows you in his little space in the study, and cares for you like how he does for us.”

Stefano is Gokudera’s most powerful aide who is a lighting user as well. He wouldn’t task Stefano with just any security job. Speaking of Stefano-

Lambo fished out the phone in his pocket. He opened the lock screen but he doesn’t know the passcode. There were no messages, and no calls. He looked at Celestina suspiciously. “Did you call Mr. Hayato?”

Celestina zipped her purse. “No.” She patted his shoulder and beckoned him to follow her.

“Did he call you and asked for me?” Lambo realized that Gokudera hasn’t been sending some of his men to fetch him. “Or did he send you a message and asked for my whereabouts?”

“No on both questions.” They reached the busy streets, passing by rushing people. On normal days, Celestina would have been happy that she has a lighter day than any of the cramming accountants and running brokers. But then again, Lambo decided come with her.

“Where are we going?”

“Lunch. From what I heard, you have a big appetite.” Celestina stopped at the sidewalk, pressing the button for them to cross.

“Who the hell eats lunch at three in the afternoon?” Lambo whined, but he hadn’t forgotten interrogating the lawyer.

“I do when I want to finish work early.” She pointed at the small restaurant across them. “They may not be one of those high class places you are used to go to, but they cook a really nice Italian meal. I do hope you like pasta.”

Lambo allowed her to pull him towards the restaurant. The waiters gave her a smile, sharing a joke or two with her. She is a regular here, no doubt. Perhaps she messaged them in advance because the server was leading them to a table with warm food already served.

The table was beside the window, the long bench with a high backrest made Lambo really suspicious of the set up. Celestina told him to go first, and Lambo scooted towards the window. She sat beside him.

Lambo picked his fork, and then his worries became a reality. From the limited view the faint reflection of the window, he could see a familiar man approaching their table. He turned, about to run from his place only to realize that Ms. Lawyer was blocking his passage.

“What’s wrong? Don’t you like the food?” Celestina asked, as if she was oblivious of why he ended up following her around town in the first place.

“I do hope he did not give you much trouble.” Gokudera sat across them, the dish almost similar to the one Celestina is having. Old people and their weird tastes.

“He is a good kid.” Celestina’s lips was subtly quirking upwards. Lambo felt goosebumps at the sight and at her nonchalant response to every unusual event (at this point, he felt like the teenage Tsuna who reacts at everything). “Snooping around my office and disarranging everything, stealing my old art notebook, and criticizing my interior design.”

“You traitor! I actually thought you are all right, and yet you ratted me out!” Lambo pointed his index finger at Celestina who sipped from her cup of coffee.

“I did not.” She calmly answered.

“She did not.” Gokudera said at the same time.

Lambo found himself reacting to their calm synchronized response rather than throwing dirt at them. “The food is already prepared and you did not even find it strange.”

“Hayato sent me a message that lunch is on him.” Celestina’s eyes narrowed at Lambo. Honestly, her pre-puberty nephews are better-behaved than this ‘twenty-year old snotty brat.’ “And he’ll give you a ride home.”

“I thought you are supposed to fight for my cause.” Lambo collapsed on his seat, drained from the mixed emotions overwhelming him within five minutes.

Celestina rolled her eyes, a gesture that greatly amused Gokudera. “I don’t work for you, Lambo. I work for your organization.” She glanced at his untouched bowl. “Your food will get cold.”

Lambo gasped at her dismissal. He turned to Gokudera, hoping for some help but then again they moved to another topic. It was a mundane topic of how their day went after they parted ways.

Celestina left out some parts, especially the part when Lambo compared her to the type of women Gokudera ‘dates,’ and told him of the worn out notebooks Lambo unearthed in her office. Gokudera went out about how Stefano was unreasonably scolding the newbie when Lambo crashed with them, and how Stefano apologized for losing his phone. She then told him of how she wanted to gloat of her work day without any scheduled appointment and no papers to be filed for the next day. He rolled her eyes at her, flicking her forehead just because he felt like doing so.

She laughed while rubbing her forehead.

“Do you remember that gelaterie in the university grounds that moved out two months ago?” Gokudera fished out his phone and swiped images from his gallery. He recalled how he came across a quaint shop with a long line of people a few days ago.

Lambo knew that Gokudera had a mission, an extremely confidential one at that, a few days ago. He was told only of the nature and where Gokudera had gone off to with some of Tsuna’s men. The mission was a success, if Gokudera’s lighter mood that day had any other indication.

“I can’t exactly tell you why I was there, but” To Lambo’s surprise, somewhere along the conversation, the right hand man had hinted that it was a mission that brought him there.

Gokudera presented his phone to her.

Of course, Lambo wanted to see the fuss because her face brightened a bit at the news.

“They went back to their hometown.” Celestina then tapped the screen and zoomed at the image that caught her attention. “They still have the lame name, though.”

“But you missed their gelato.” Gokudera pointed out.

Celestina nodded in response. He left his phone at the side of his plate, his wrist bare of the only accessory it adorns. “Don’t deny that you loved their butterscotch ice cream infused with rum and beer.” He snorted, and she laughed.

Lambo couldn’t take being ignored. He has been the third wheel for most of Gokudera’s ‘dates’ (to the silver head’s chagrin), but this one was the first time he had been an impromptu third wheel, and the first time he has seen Gokudera carry on with the conversation genuinely. “I’d like one too.”

“You won’t like it.” Lambo pouted at Gokudera’s instant rejection.

The conversation went on until Lambo whined that he wanted to go home. Gokudera brought a car with him and opened the front door for Celestina. Lambo, of course, stole the seat from her, grinning at Gokudera without any hint of remorse.

Celestina got in the back seat without any man opening the door for her. Gokudera gave Lambo a glare before he went to the driver’s seat.

They dropped her off her house, and headed to the Vongola manor. Lambo teased him that he has a crush on their lawyer. Gokudera calmly denied any of those ridiculous statement, claiming that he’s old enough for those kinds of things.

Yet, Lambo could feel something different with the way he acted around Celestina. They were so open to each other almost like they were comfortable around the other.

Of course, after that day, Lambo went on with his life and forgot the activities. He was grateful to the lawyer because Gokudera did not scold him afterwards.

A month later, Lambo went inside Gokudera’s study. The bomber was nowhere in sight that made his plan easier to execute. He placed a paper bag in the middle of the desk. The plan was to place the gift and leave but the beautifully wrapped box beside the study lamp caught Lambo’s attention. There was a handwritten note.

Donate this to Red Cross if you already have one. The note said. Lambo shook his head as he placed the gift back where he found it.

There was no indication who it was from. He didn’t bother anymore, deciding it was better to leave right then and there.

The next day, he saw Gokudera in the dining hall. He was adjusting his watch similar to the one Lambo accidentally broke.

Chapter Text

Celestina is good with children. It came with taking care of a younger brother, and her niece and nephews. Although it baffled her that the Vongola headquarters have children who seemed to be wiser than their age visiting every now and then, she often found herself playing with some of the personnel’s children.

(Of course, she would avoid Reborn- except that she knew better than to believe that said hitman is a child. And any child that has some sort of animal companion and has an intensive vocabulary for someone their age.)

One distress mafia boss was saved by the arrival of said lawyer in the kitchen. A little girl, around eight years old, was wailing. It was a funny scene in Celestina’s eyes, but she knew better than to attack the pride of mafia men capable of killing her right then and there. Three full grown men, feared by most of the people in the underworld, were in a state of panic over a calamity. The table was filled with things for oral hygiene. Celestina observed the three after she had filled her cup of coffee, and leaned against the sink.

“How about baseball idiot and I hold Tenth’s daughter while you look for the offending object?” Gokudera suggested, his hands twitching at his side, ready to do whatever he was suggesting to his boss.

The swordsman gave a grin, trying to calm the little siren. “Let us have a look at your mouth so it won’t hurt anymore.” Another loud wail erupted.

“It hurts!”

She grimaced, keeping her dislike for unruly children to herself. Her darling nephews and niece didn’t have that stage. Although she remembered that one time she was scolded by her mother when she almost hit Gregor for having an alleged tantrum. It turned out that something was stuck in his throat after eating some nuts.

Yamamoto turned to the Vongola Tenth, whispering to him, “I think we should knock her out and ask the doctors to cure her immediately.” He gave a sheepish grin to which earned him a scolding glare from the right hand man. 

The three men were discussing how to treat the little siren, oblivious of Celestina approaching the little girl. It was only when the crying stopped that they bothered checking on the situation.

“Ah, Attorney Milano!” The Vongola Tenth was about to grab his daughter but stopped himself. He took a step back to get a better view of the scene before him. His daughter finally stopped sobbing. Celestina had finally taken action when she saw that the men are incapable of helping this child. She cradled the little girl’s head, massaging her neck, the area where the child pointed to have something poking her insides, soothingly. “I’m sorry for the trouble.”

Celestina glanced at the tenth, shaking her head. “It’s no problem at all, Decimo.” Her attention was brought back to the child, who sniffed. “What do you want to drink? It will help drown the seed that was stuck in your throat.” Her voice held the gentleness that Tsuna was reminded of his wife. His daughter immediately warmed up to the stranger.

“I want milk.” The little girl answered, wiping her tears.

Before Celestina could get up, a glass of milk was handed to her by the swordsman. “Thank you, Mr. Yamamoto.” She took the glass and gave it to the child who drank it slowly. The first gulped made her knit her brows in pain but the milk was effective in drowning the seed and there was no more pain on the second gulp. When the little girl was done, Celestina wiped the child’s mouth with a tissue. “Does it still hurt?” She asked.

“Not anymore.” The child answered.

The three men sighed in relief.

Yamamoto offhandedly left a remark about how it is natural for women like her to have her motherly instincts kick in.

Gokudera knew better. He sees Celestina as a well-natured person in general.

Not the kind, delicate and gentle way like Sasagawa’s sister who permeates so much warmth like she was the embodiment of sunshine and rainbow. Not the appealing and charming Miura, who despite her quirks, is still empowered and a graceful lady most feminist would ideally portray in their campaign.

Celestina is a well-natured person, and even Tsuna agrees. She’s not as sociable as both the ladies they grew up with. She’s more introverted, talking to those around her only when necessary and foregoing the painstakingly long short talks. Much like Gokudera, it will take a while for her to open up with people.

The day went on after that.

After working, Yamamoto offered to give her a ride to town for there are other matters Gokudera and Tsuna has to discuss. Tsuna saw the reluctance on her part. His daughter insists that she too sees her new friend off. They waited for the car at the porch, Tsuna noting that Gokudera and Celestina were whispering among themselves.

“You’ve worked with him before. What’s the problem?” It was the closest to words of comfort one could get from Gokudera. Tsuna saw him work with some of their men and his right hand man never showed this kind of care to them. “It’s not like he would remember your cover.”

“He doesn’t need to do this just because of the case.” Celestina muttered under her breath.

“He’s not doing it because of that.” Tsuna tilted his head to the side in wonder. “You’re not troubling him stu-” Gokudera caught himself before he could say the words in front of the child. “-Woman. It’s his nature to give free rides whenever he could.”

Tsuna could remember how Gokudera placed a hand on her shoulder gently pushing her towards the front seat. “You’ll be fine woman. Stop overthinking things!” He reminded her. Then, he addressed Yamamoto. “Don’t do anything that will make her feel uncomfortable.” He warned, his eyes particularly trained on the swordsman’s hands.

“I’ll take care of her, don’t worry.” Yamamoto reassured him, patting the passenger seat as he smiled at Celestina.

She looked at his hand for a couple of seconds before saying her farewell to Gokudera. He closed the door after she had buckled her seatbelt.

The two of them left. Tsuna has been working with her for almost two years, and yet he never had the chance to know Celestina. She is still under the protection of the Vongola despite her lack of answer in his invitation. He simply assumed that she’s all right with the things they make her do but he never considered if she’s comfortable with what they throw at her.

After he and Gokudera was done with their meeting, he asked about how she’s finding working with them. Tsuna noticed the slight change in Gokudera’s voice when reporting. It was reminiscent with the way he seems too smug whenever Lambo had mastered a technique Gokudera taught him, similar to how he kept into heart every details of each guardian’s quirks.

O~O~O

After a brief report on the documents that Celestina notarized for Tsuna, they decided to take a break in the kitchen. She had already washed her cup and left it to dry when she poured another and prepared some light savory snacks on the side.

“Oh is that for Hayato?” Tsuna asked, depositing his cup in the sink as well.

“He is rushing a lot of things for the Construction firm, so he wouldn’t really find time to get something for himself.” Celestina thoughtfully placed a bottle of water on the tray as well. “I’m already here so I might as well get some for him too.”  She gave Tsuna a smile that the latter easily returned.

So far, Celestina has also been helpful in giving him tips on how to approach a certain party when it seems that the other has the upper hand. Federico had taught her well, and if she has been born in the mafia, then she would be working alongside Tsuna as well. He deemed that consulting with her on how to approach some matters is better than taking her too deep in the mafia. It is better that the boss deals with those matters than assign it to some other person after all.

“Decimo, always doubt the intention of the people who comes to you first. Think why they would mention little things in the conversation, why they would be meek and humble, why they would be aggressive. You are a kind person,” Celestina couldn’t really leave the brunet in his own devices after his kind treatment to her. “It shows. Your kindness could easily be taken advantage. If the person talking to you brings your weaknesses, chances are they want you to succumb to them because they are more desperate to get whatever they wanted to get.” At times, Celestina wished her mentor did not die. No person, not even the most ruthless man alive would dare confront her heartless mentor. Federico Giani always got what he wanted.

“It’s been a while since I got a very-” Rash, aggressive, rude, insolent, uncouth, ill-mannered, uncivilized, “-expressive guest.” Tsuna got used to them- people who wants to get the Vongola’s favor- being so courteous and polite that it surprised him. His energy was depleted after the meeting because it was really hard to resist punching those assholes. His intuition told him that Celestina must observe because she has a way with knowing how to make a person succumb to them. He didn’t ask her to accompany them during the negotiation (hostile talk that involves a lot of crass language from the other party) because it would be dangerous. He had gathered information about the methods of this family. He allowed Celestina to watch from the secret room inside his office.

“They are a shocking bunch.” Celestina agreed. The men that came to the Vongola manor did not bother dressing up for the occasion. They are the stereotype of a Mafioso that can be found in the movies.

Tsuna covered his face with a hand, sighing deeply at the predicament he was facing. Cleansing the Vongola of the illegalities and turning it back to how Vongola Primo envisioned it to be is harder than expected. The efforts he has been exerting through the years to dig the family out of this hole seemed like he merely pushed aside a grain of dirt from where they buried him.

“Don’t be disheartened, Decimo.” Celestina could remember one of the men. He had a scar just below his eye. Unlike his companions, he wasn’t talkative but he was observing. Gokudera and Tsuna did not miss him because it was easier to dismiss a dogs who only bark but do not bite. “First impressions are important in every business transactions whether in the surface world or in the underground world. Some people just tend to be more comfortable in showing who they really are. Sadly, most choose to appear what they want to be perceived as.” She got Tsuna’s undivided attention.

Her mentor taught her this the hard way. She almost quit her job then. She honestly couldn’t remember why she wanted to prove her mentor wrong about her will, or perhaps it was his way of making her use that cynic outlook to her advantage. “People will not approach you if they do not need something from you. It has been the norm since the beginning of time. Many social contracts were formed that forced people to unite. It’s only a matter of who would reign over who.”

“Democrats would disprove that thought, Miss Celestina.” Tsuna wondered if she always had this outlook. Most of the time, she’s the amicable lawyer they had the luck to work with.

“No. They say it is the people who reigns but they offer their services to the people because it is the people who would lift them to that pedestal. It appears that the people are in charge but when they hold the power, there’s nothing a commoner can do.” In a way, mafia transactions and the alleged legal transactions are similar. It’s just a matter of what society accepts as acceptable conduct. “Anyway, those men may act like they own the world but remember that at some point, all of us are great actors. They wanted you to think of them as a strong family who can match the Vongola’s power but they wouldn’t approach you if they are really powerful.”

Tsuna’s brow knitted in thought. “The Cavallone is powerful as well yet they approached the Vongola to be an ally. The same applies to the Giglio Nero and the Gesso’s.”

“Do you have the same ideals with the Ghent family?” She pointed out, lips quirking upwards when he shook his head. “From what I heard, you’ve fought many battles with the bosses of those families. They also accepted the fact that the Vongola family is stronger so rather than losing a lot, they formed an agreement with you. Unlike your alliance, they harass and extort innocent civilians and noncombatants. They would not even acknowledge that you are stronger than them. People say they came from a syndicate group until they recruited more talented people, others say that they came from a family of fighters trained in extreme conditions to thrive in any environment, some say that the Ghent is-” She couldn’t remember what she heard from the staff when she arrived. They were murmuring amongst themselves at the same time.

“A mercenary that gained enough capital to start a mafia family.” Tsuna finished for her. She nodded.

“Did you hear any other rumors that does not involve the Ghent’s being a strong family?” He shook his head. “Strong men, mafia or otherwise, does not hide the fact that they are weak before they got to their position. It forms part of their legacy. They seemed to have contained that information. People who are actually strong who approaches you would like you to think that you have the upper hand.”

Her chuckle brought a smile to Tsuna’s lips as well. “But men are different. It’s not always like that and this is just one time I’ve observed them. I might also be wrong because it’s really a misrepresentation.”

“You might be right.” Tsuna offered. He knew she was right, that they wanted to appear as a strong family. Their flames may be strong but not in par with the higher ranked flame users of the Vongola. His gut was telling him that something was wrong though, and he knew that it’s not about the misrepresentation. Perhaps, he’s missing something essential.

“Don’t think too much about it, Decimo.” She left him with a smile, wishing him good luck before she made her way to Gokudera’s study.

She was about to give him a witty remark about leaving his cage, but he was watching the retreating figures of their guests that afternoon with his wary scowl. She stopped beside him, surveying the three persons.

The Ghent Family, they were called. They came in the morning, interrupting the serene breakfast of Decimo in the gardens. Gokudera was resting then, just having arrived from a mission in Cyprus. The commotion they caused woke him up and they demanded some damages be paid to them after a Vongola branch family allegedly raided one of their warehouses. 

They have been harassing some of the followers of the Vongola within their area, and that small family has been problematic as of late. They have no sense of propriety and chivalry, and they wouldn’t care if they got the wrong person.

Celestina was trying to get a clear view on one of them. Gokudera doesn’t usually mind small fries but he was bothered, to say the least. A slight change in their boss’ smile would be enough to send fear coursing through a rookie’s body.

She almost got her chance to get a look when the man in the middle was turning to look back.

She frowned at the sight of Gokudera’s wine red dress shirt blocking her vision. When she was about to move, Gokudera held her arms, his strength spilling some of the coffee she brought. If any one of them does anything funny, Reborn is lurking somewhere in the room.

“Turn around, walk normally, and wait for me in the library.” Gokudera whispered to her, waiting for her to be out of sight before he turned to three Ghent guests. They were looking at her retreating form curiously that immensely irritated him.

“Why don’t you let us see her beautiful face, Storm guardian?”

Women are seen as objects even now. Celestina remembered the words of her mentor, always warning her to keep a distance away from the underlings of a mafia family. They have no sense of manners and acts like pigs when they are the brainless bunch.

She kept walking away, her eyes meeting with Reborn who gave her a reassuring nod as he lifted his gun.

“Once we raid this castle, it’s good to know that there is a pretty face here we can take.”

She stopped walking, her hands turning cold.

“Then we’ll make her scream in front of your battered body, Storm guardian.” The three cackled in unison while Gokudera remained unimpressed.

Celestina chuckled as she muttered, “Or, he’ll make you scream like a girl.” She headed to the library as was instructed, gripping the tray tightly.

Reborn smirked, placing his gun at his side. When the three left, he went to Gokudera and informed him that Celestina reached the library safely and without facing them.

“It’s a surprise though.” Reborn placed his hands in his pocket, watching Gokudera calm his anger. “For a second there, I thought you would introduce her to them.”

“They may look like a bunch of weaklings but they are better than my men. They can’t protect Celestina when those idiots decide to attack her.” Gokudera did not catch the glint in Reborn’s eyes. “I am not always with her, after all.”

“But you never did that to your other dates.” Reborn pointed out, smirking when Gokudera turned away from him.

Gokudera ran towards the library, stopping by the double doors to calm his nerves. The hitman was just playing with him, catching him off guard when his emotions are high.

Chapter Text

Gokudera was six when he first heard the soft mumbles urging his hands to press the keys of the piano. They finished the song, his hands feeling a little bit sore but he felt proud of himself that he had to show it to his father and mother. His father was praising him during dinner. Bianchi’s mother nodded once, and returned to her soup. Two months after, his first performance was scheduled in a ball hosted by his father. He couldn’t really remember what happened, only the stomach aches and the hazy surroundings. He swore never to eat any of Bianchi’s creation, and the trauma was never forgotten by his stomach.

He was seven when the beautiful lady who taught him how to play became more than just the lady who taught him how to play the piano. He looked forward to the dates that she would tell him when she could visit him again. He strove to improve his piano skills until he would play a difficult song with ease.

In between the lady’s visits, he would be occupied with his other tutors. They loved his amicable nature and intelligence. He would blush when they call him a genius of this time, and promises to work harder. His mother never showed the enthusiasm and pride his father was giving him every time he accomplished tasks his numerous tutors would give him. He simply reasoned that there is a bias when associated with sexes and his mother spent a lot of time with Bianchi with their girl talk and boring girlish activities he never wants to be a part of.

(He learned later that the ‘madame’ actually passed down poison cooking to Bianchi.)

He was eight when he learned the reason of his father’s reluctance on openly showing him affection, and madam’s cold demeanor towards him. He was not really accepted in the family, and the maids were bold enough to spread the truth of his filiation. The only person who was so welcoming to him stopped visiting him. Despite the declaration that he is his father’s son, young Hayato never felt he belonged in the castle. He later learned from the other staff of the kind lady- such a beautiful lady with loose morals going after an already married man, they would say- and the not-so kind fate she had, falling in a cliff just like how she fell for the boss. In both cases, no one caught her from the fall.

He ran away from the castle, hating the attention and the cruel world he lived in.

The world was indeed cruel in the streets of Italy. He learned that he’s the only one who didn’t know of the fact of his birth, that even small families knew that he is a bastard. No one wants a bastard within their midst.

Three nights of sleeping under the stars, Shamal found him and became his guardian. A lousy one at that.

He was ten when he learned lighting dynamites and aiming it at moving targets. Shamal had a scowl on his face, brows knitted. He didn’t know what his mentor was thinking back then but for him, it was enough to make a living for himself and not to depend on others. 

Children do not demand high wages for a job well done, just enough to keep ends meet. Gokudera is one such child, and he saves whatever left of his earnings. He swore never to touch the account his father opened for him. Three jobs later, Gokudera Hayato learned the habit of smoking for practicality, and he became known as ‘Smoking Bomb Hayato.’

He was twelve when the Vongola heard of his abilities. They hired him as a freelancer to dispose of those too small mob that bothered their territory and its allies’.  After his fifth mission, he was only paid a good amount and was thanked for his job well done. There were no invitation to be part of any family, and his father never bothered to take him back.

Shamal scolded him a lot of times that the battle field is not a place for children.

He never listened. His father keep on giving him monthly stipends but he never touched those. The Vongola ninth rewarded him by offering to give stipends to him so he won’t have to touch his father’s support. He accepted to spite his family. Yet, he was not offered a place within the Vongola until they assigned him to assassinate one of the candidates in Namimori, Japan.

He was convinced then that no one really wanted him so he built walls and armed himself with dynamites to keep anyone from getting in.

He was fourteen when he learned that being loyal doesn’t mean dying for them. He learned, thanks to his tenth and the people around him who he kept on pushing away, that he doesn’t need to die for them or kill for them just to have a place in their little family. Staying by their side and watching the fireworks is better than any inheritance or honor he could give Tsuna. He never felt welcome in a family until that time, so he decided to stay with them even if it meant losing the one thing that would cement his claim as the right hand man of Sawada Tsunayoshi.

He was sixteen when he started entertaining dates. The first girl he had a relationship ended up regretting ever knowing him because he was guarded around her. After barely a month, they went on with their lives, him passing her by the hallway and her asking her friends to help her compute the grade she needed to keep her place at the top five of their batch.

He was twenty when he never bothered knowing the names of his hook-ups and instead kicked them out of his place the morning after, or simply leave them in the hotel. The cracks in his head are slowly decreasing. Tsuna officially took the reign, still being supervised by Reborn and the ninth until they deem him capable. There are a lot of changes for them, starting with moving in Italy. Gokudera was named his right-hand man, something that he strives hard to be. Even Coyote Nougat seemed to praise him for knowing the appropriate things to do.

Gokudera knew that it was because he came from this life, he lived amongst the underlings at a young age. More than ever, Tsuna needed him in this aspect. Unlike his boss, he was unfortunate to have such fate.

But he has a home now with them, and he intends to protect it.

He was twenty-two when he tried to date again, because the Tenth goaded him good naturedly. He still hooked-up with nameless women who are willing, the date is part of his job as the right-hand man after all. She would never go out with him if he isn’t the right hand man, he knew for a fact. She ended whatever it was after she found of his infidelity.

He wondered if all women are emotional for crying over something that was inevitable. She was too dignified to tell it to her father nor interfere with the upcoming project between their families. But when they would meet, he could see that she would reject any good looking man with a kind intention, putting up barriers around her bigger than the walls of their mansion.

When they passed by each other, she took the opportunity to spill her thoughts that greatly surprised him.

“I sincerely loved you back then.”

Before he could turn to face her, she was not in sight.

Gokudera forced the what-ifs at the back of his head and instead focused on detecting any threats.

He was twenty-four when he first saw ‘madam’ disheveled and unguarded. He never wanted to go back to the mansion where he grew up but this was official business. The meeting with his father ended later than usual, and he wanted to visit the music room. For some reason, the ‘madam’ was there, embracing a bottle of aged scotch, drinking directly from the bottle. The image was burned in his head, the raw emotions reverberating in the room.

“It’s really unfortunate that you have to be the object of my spite towards your father.” Bianchi had tried to make her family complete, and they have come to a silent agreement to be decent human being with each other. That is the best they could do at the situation. “You look like her and your father, the thought keeps on insulting me.”

Gokudera turned to leave, but the madame’s words stopped him. “It may have been better if I was the one who died that day because I feel like a ghost within the very walls of my marriage. Don’t ever be like your father, Hayato.”

It was the first time he felt sympathy for the woman who was so cold to him, who never made him feel he belonged in a family he indirectly almost destroyed. But it was the first time she was so gentle with him, even giving him a motherly advice he longed for as a child.

But, that is why he never really entered into a relationship. Flings and one night stands are better. There won’t be anyone who will get hurt in the end.

He doesn’t need a relationship because he has the Vongola, and that’s all that matters.

He was twenty-five when he last entered a serious relationship. It lasted for a year until his partner demanded his time from the Vongola. Their last fight consisted of yelling after she asked him to choose between his work and their relationship. The answer was glaringly obvious. He swore then that he doesn’t need anyone other than the famiglia.

He was thirty when he met Celestina Milano. She is a well-natured person who is a very efficient counsel, handling the legal matters of their cover business and some messy criminal cases that made it to court. She never revealed the nature of her client’s job despite the growing criticisms of her character by some of her colleagues. He had mentioned some of his underground work- embezzlement, homicide- in passing and yet she shrugged and told him of the metalsmith that could personalize any rings for him. She always waited for him to reveal anything, and even when she came from a civilian family, he never felt the need to appear the most innocent at least in front of her.

She became a constant in their lives thanks to the nature of her job. She worked with them for two years already without fail and without giving them a reason to doubt her. Most lawyers would insist to know every detail of their trade so they can represent their client well. Gokudera has trouble believing that logic so he would only give them what they need to know. It always ends up with the outsider grudgingly accepting what was handed to him or blaming them for a failed job.

Celestina would wait for them to voluntarily give the information. He didn’t know if it was her self-preservation tendency or simply just part of her acquiescence nature. She takes what they are willing to give and gives all that she could. She’s nearly as efficient as her mentor but there are times when she fails. She tries to remedy it but there are times when she couldn’t simply because she lacked the experience of dealing with the underground. Perhaps if she came from their world, she would be a legend like her mentor. Luckily those errors do not have a drastic effect in their usual dealings.

Gokudera would break the news to her not so kindly. She would react with silence, already thinking back to locate where she got it wrong. She would mumble angrily- at herself, he was certain.

The Vongola would solve it in no time. He would leave her be to contemplate. She would be sorry. He could hear the plea in her voice (the familiar prayer in his apologies for every single mistake he committed during his teenage years) hoping not to be disposed of.

And she learns from her mistakes. She would make sure that they never suffer from the same mistake she committed.

However, one afternoon he received a message from his subordinates he assigned to watch her. She went to the territory of the Alvarez family who has a long grudge with the Vongola family. They reported that she reached there by train and walked to some unknown alley. Gokudera sped off and reached his subordinates in no time.

He amicably approached a pair of men who was smoking outside the café across the alley that they were observing. He asked for some light, and they offered a seat. They were speaking in codes.

“This town still loves sending letters to people. Nowadays, kids send them to bully the weaker ones.” Gokudera scanned the area, letting the smoke overwhelm his system. Less than five minutes and he was on his way to this third stick. “And if they have those pesky smartphones, the bullying gets creative.”

His subordinates shared a look. “Perhaps you are too prejudiced with the kids.” One of them suggested. They earned a scowl from their superior, much to their surprise. “The weak does not necessarily get bullied. They have other means of fighting when their body couldn’t do it for them or when they choose to associate with the strong people.”

“The weak who thinks have principle.” Gokudera rose from his seat, putting out his cigarette on the ash tray and left his subordinates.  

His men looked at each other, wondering why the storm guardian was so adamant that she was forced to be here.

It was an unknown territory. Celestina did not emerge from the alley yet. Gokudera decided to see what she has to face on her own. He walked passed a garbage with stacks of rotten wood, the pavement littered with scraps of wood until he reached a small shop. There were some chairs and other small furniture outside, showcasing the sculpting skills of the shop owner. He went inside, the doorbell announcing his presence.

Celestina’s back was on him, still talking with the attendant while she turned the pages of the portfolio. The attendant left to get the other designs when she asked for more.

“What are you doing here, woman?” Gokudera made his presence known to her. He crossed his arms on his chest as he tapped his foot.

She beamed at the sight of him. “Oh good, you’re here!” She realized a bit too late that he was not supposed to be here but before she could protest about his presence, he immediately pulled her out of the shop without saying any word. She almost stumbled catching up with his steps but he held her wrist tightly. “Is something wrong?” She finally asked when they were beside his car that she was sending glares.

“What are you doing here?” He tapped his foot, waiting for her explanation. Her lips opened, then closed. She bit her thumb, no doubt thinking again. But he has no time to wait for her to try to make sense of her thoughts that is probably running a mile per second. “Don’t make me repeat the question.” He threatened.

“Furniture shopping. You get tired constantly driving to and fro from town to there when you own various apartments nearer work.” Celestina was aware of the repercussions of carelessly blurting out terms in public. They were not the only ones using the sidewalk after all. “At least furnish one apartment, Hayato. Or maybe just one. At least you’ll have a space to rest when you are too tired to go home.” She looked down, unable to organize her thoughts. “It’s healthier for your body, lifestyle, and for the environment.” She was too exasperated to figure out where to begin. It was tiring, the events overwhelming her. She wanted to just look for a suitable design and present to him the next time they meet. It was bad enough that she was feeling a bit guilty and panicky at her impromptu adventure because she would have to lie where she was if he looked for her.

“At least notify the owner, idiot!” He resisted the urge to flick her forehead for he might employ a lot more force than necessary. But his shoulders visibly loosened and he could finally breathe with ease (it was because he smoked more sticks after two months of lessening his smoking habit, he reasoned). 

“I wanted it to be a surprise so you will not give me an excuse that you don’t have the time.” She reasoned, taking a step near him so people will not look at them and get the wrong message. That and the people will not be privy of their conversation. Oddly, the confession lessened the weight on her chest.

“Why here of all places anyway?” Gokudera clicked the button of his key to unlock the doors. He opened the front door for her, head motioning for her to get in. 

“The previous owner used to be a client in a pro bono case. I helped him get a stall in this area for his business.” She pointed at the café across them. “I helped him gain some right to operate there. It surprised me that he moved to the narrow alley.”

Gokudera saw the attendant hiding in the alley, watching them closely. He turned back to Celestina who looked sad. Decisions of the court remains in paper. “You don’t like the designs?”

“No. I wanted a modern touch.” He tapped her shoulder once, and she knew better than to protest. She sat comfortably on the front seat, buckling her seatbelt. She stopped him from closing the car door, brows knitted. “But how about-”

Gokudera found himself with an odd patience that day. It didn’t matter that he left the Vongola manor abruptly, leaving it in the hands of the last person he would entrust the property to- Lambo. He couldn’t even feel bothered that Lambo will screw things up meeting with Dino, and with the Varia later. He should be worried even with Ryohei reassuring him that he will accompany Lambo in the meeting with the Varia so he can attend to this matter. “I have a place in mind. We can shop for some furniture there after we take a look at the apartment that we will furnish. How does that sound?” She beamed at his statement and closed the door herself.

He took her in the apartment near her place. It has a nice view of the city landscape especially at night. It was bigger than the one he used to live in Japan, much more luxurious too. Unlike before where he struggled to pay his rent and get by each day, he could afford the most expensive house in Italy and eat in any five-star restaurants. But all the units he owns are bare or with very little furnishings to actually call it a room even.

She teased him that he bothered completing his bathroom set. She surveyed the rooms, her hums echoing in the unit. They brainstormed on the type of furniture, the design and the layout.

Gokudera ignored Lambo’s numerous calls and messages, putting his phone on silent mode.

They decided to walk going to the shopping district instead of using his vehicle. Celestina walked ahead, scanning the shops they passed by. He intentionally lagged behind, hands in his pocket so he wouldn’t lose sight of her in the always present crowd. They reached the furniture shop he said he had in mind, and they entered side by side.

They took a break from shopping after they covered most of the essentials. She was buying them a drink while he stayed by the side holding some of the things they bought for his apartment, the ones that can be carried like bedsheets and curtains. He liked the experience and he didn’t mind having another one of these escapades with her the next time. Without her, he wouldn’t have thought of getting extra sets, or getting the right kind of curtains that fits the window style of his unit.

He placed them on the ground, fishing out his phone from his pocket when he felt the vibration of an incoming call. He accepted the call and heard Squalo’s yell from the other line.

“The lightning trash is crying even before we started!” Squalo wanted him back in the manor to have things in motion. Lambo was explaining why he was crying in the background, something about Fran and Bel bullying him. Gokudera found that he couldn’t care less.

“I told you not to call octopus head!” Ryohei’s screams can be at par with the loudest Varia member, it seemed.

“He’s easier to talk with!” They were having an argument from the other line. Somehow Lambo got hold of the phone, begging him to come back or he will destroy the manor with his grenades.

“You guys seem to be getting along just fine.” Gokudera watched Celestina pay for their juice, getting kiwi for her while getting an iced black tea for him. She thanked the kid manning the stand before getting the cups.

“What’s happening here?!” Demanded Tsuna, perhaps fed up by the noise. The men explained all at once, Lambo was still crying. Tsuna got the phone. “Is this Hayato? Not that we need you right now but where are you?” There was desperation in Tsuna’s tone as he tried to get some peace in the room. It was impossible though, with Squalo and Ryohei.

“Oh boss,” Gokudera watched Celestina almost stumble in the uneven pavement but she caught herself midway. He relaxed on the bench upon seeing her unharmed. “Yes, it was an urgent matter. I’m furniture shopping so if you’d excuse me.” He hang up scooting to the side to give her space. She handed him his drink and they watched the fleeting crowd in their little space.

Back in the manor, Tsuna has a warm smile on his face, glad that his right hand man is slowly finding a reason to live outside the Vongola. His various apartments around the town is just Gokudera trying to convince himself that he has a place outside the manor but he didn’t bother making a home out of it. Behind him, Ryohei and Lambo were holding down Squalo who was shouting profanities at the knowledge that Gokudera placed more importance in furniture shopping than their meeting.

Chapter Text

Bianchi watched from the kitchen the group of younger men celebrating at the dining table of the newly furnished apartment. Gokudera’s furniture shopping was known to everyone in the manor (if Squalo’s shouts weren’t enough broadcasting) within the hour they called her younger brother. News spread like wildfire within the family.

Even Iemitsu asked the right hand man what was the fuss about the silver haired man furniture shopping when they have the chance to meet. Each of them has different ways on how to spend their money no matter how perplexing it is. Gokudera just happen to like buying fancy vehicles and apartments. It is no secret where he brings the women he beds. At one point, the former CEDEF head mused that he bought one apartment per woman.

Bianchi wondered if that was true. However, she went along in this little housewarming party not to confirm Iemitsu’s premise but to confirm if he actually bothered trying to settle in the world outside the Vongola.

Yamamoto and Sasagawa suggested that they have a housewarming for Gokudera. Of course, her brother immediately dismissed the notion and went back to work.

Tsuna wanted to celebrate it. And of course, Gokudera claimed that it was a wonderful idea.

That led to them in Gokudera’s newly furnished apartment on New Year’s Eve. Bianchi found the apartment well designed despite the lack of interior designers. The girls- Haru and Kyoko- appreciated the cabin theme of his living room and praised him for his tastes.

“I got help from a friend. But the concept came from Pinterest.” Gokudera felt like fifteen again when the adults around him are teasing him of the opposite sex, dating and things couples would usually do. He felt ridiculous because it was just Celestina and everyone knows her (by name or by face but not as personal as he does), and there’s really nothing so special about helping him furnish his apartment.

Bianchi allowed a soft smile on her face at the sight of her little brother allowing others to enter his world he has carefully hidden from the rest. It took a while but progress is progress. She took the finest wine she found in his bar and brought it to the dining table. “How about a toast? It’s not every day that Hayato decides he would move out of his cave.”

“It’s not a cave!” Gokudera protested that earned collective laughter as a response. He didn’t know why he allowed it, this little get together in his own house nonetheless. Perhaps it was him craving for a healthy company because he couldn’t live his life always getting a quick fix just to feel that momentary bliss. Perhaps it was him getting too old for that lifestyle or he was just feeling content with life in general because it’s New Year and everyone should enjoy the holidays.

After everyone has their own glasses filled, Tsuna made a toast- to Gokudera’s moving out and for everyone making it through the end of the year with a smile. They cheered at that.

It was Lambo who dropped the question that everyone has been itching to ask the moment they arrived. “Mr. Hayato, what plans do you have with the others?” The youngest Vongola guardian was gesturing vaguely at the air. He doesn’t know what to call this four walled structure that is commonly called an apartment when Gokudera give it a label.

Gokudera leaned against the backrest, shrugging. “I have no time to decide or buy something for the others.” But then again, he doesn’t want to give them time when not necessary.

Bianchi sighed, her elation dropping rapidly. It would take another while. She should have been contented with her brother’s progress.

His generic answer seems acceptable. “Don’t get used to having parties at my place, Lambo.”

“Then what set this place apart from the others?” Lambo looked around the cozy atmosphere. He’d be damned if the less than chilly vibe Gokudera’s home was oozing came from Pinterest because every corner speaks of him. The dark, sleek, stylish, and mauve hues of the furniture to that cryptic portrait above the fireplace, the golden pyramid-like puzzle on the coffee table, the peppermint scented candles in different places. 

Gokudera remembered the fear that coursed through his body when his subordinates called him that afternoon telling him that Celestina was in the Alvarez territory. He remembered the relief that came to him when he saw her unharmed inside the small shop, and how it was supposed to be a surprise. “It’s nearer the places where I’m supposed to be.”

He remembered how they grabbed take out along the way after their ‘furniture shopping,’ and they ate on the floor browsing Pinterest to look for a suitable concept. He bashfully admitted to her then that he has always wanted to do something like that but he never saw the reason. “It’s tiring to drive the long way home every day. For a man who has various apartments scattered around town, it wouldn’t be healthy really.” He grinned at them. Celestina responded to him that there’s a first time for everything. He wanted to take the first step because he couldn’t keep on begging for a place to belong.

Reborn smirked at the content smile on Bianchi’s face and the relief in Tsuna’s body language.

 “We should have invited Celestina over especially since she helped Hayato with all this.” Yamamoto suggested. She’s not the reason that Gokudera decided to do this per se, but she contributed to it among other things.

Gokudera placed a hand on his chin while his other was swirling his glass of wine. “Don’t call her, idiot.” This earned him curious looks from Bianchi, Reborn and Tsuna. Yamamoto frowned at his phone. “It’s her birthday too.” One she hated as a child because she only gets one gift for the year. As an adult she seemed to be happy about it because she could celebrate and mingle with her relatives only once.

“You idiot, we should call her and greet her!” Sasagawa declared, giving Yamamoto more reason to call.

“She’s probably busy with the chores her siblings don’t want to do while keeping her nephews and nieces entertained.” He informed them, a small smile grazing his lips at the thought.

No one commented on the fondness they saw. Whatever she did to make him draw back to this more certain Hayato they know, they could only guess. But they were thankful because he is getting better in the passing days.

The topic moved from Gokudera to some other things like Lambo and I-pin’s studies. I-pin showed interest in playing the piano and thanked Gokudera for his help. Lambo maintained that lazy and nonchalant attitude with life in general but he was doing his best. It moved to Haru and her promotion in the company she works. Kyoko finally resigning from her work to take care of her daughter that surprised and moved Tsuna to tears. Lambo shared Tsuna’s joy in Kyoko’s resignation because he gets to eat delicious home cooked meals that is close to Nana’s cooking.

Yamamoto started coaching aspiring players when he is not required to carry the sword around him. Reborn casually mentioned a name of some famous model that is always associated with the baseball player but the swordsman calmly refuted those rumors. Bianchi and Reborn immediately expressed their disappointment at the lack of romance on his part. Somehow, it became a sort of matchmaking session, a few of their friends throwing some name that would match Yamamoto.

Ryohei shared the news and that he and Hana are expecting a son. They were genuinely happy for the couple, finally starting their family after years of trying. The conversation turned to names that would suit best Ryohei’s child.

Gokudera listened, a smile slowly grazing his lips. He wondered if he would find someone that he would want to start a family with. A particular auburn haired lady comes to mind and he immediately downed the wine in his glass to shake away those thoughts. Yet he toyed with the idea of a person waiting for him after a tiring day in this apartment.

When he bought this place, he felt so ridiculous for even thinking of that childish notion. He bought the unit on a whim, it being the first condominium project that the company finished under his supervision. They advertised the building then as a place where a family starts.

Perhaps getting old is making him long for things he knows is impossible for him.

It’s not bad to indulge those thoughts sometimes. But he wouldn’t trade what he already have with Celestina for those too-good-to-be-true make believes when she seems to make any mundane routine more interesting.

Despite claiming that she should stop complimenting the dishes he makes for the two of them, he actually finds it endearing.

After the countdown, he fished out his phone and greeted Celestina a happy birthday. She replied wishing him a Happy New Year (and thanking him for remembering because her family seemed to have forgotten) with a picture of the cake she proudly decorated for the festivities. He wanted to point out that it does not count as cooking or baking but he decided to be kind since it’s her birthday.

For once, there’s somewhere he belonged that he created for himself.

Chapter Text

The first time the Vongola actually sent her for some real negotiation in the mafia world, Celestina’s clenched fists were so tight, her knuckles turned white. Hibari was her bodyguard for that week for he knows the operation more than any of the guardians. They were trying to make a deal with some yakuza dealing arms and trading women to warring states but the real intent was to expose them. She prayed to all the saints she could recall, hoping that she could pull off a decent poker face as she does whatever should be done.

It was the first time she had realized that while the Vongola may have become a mafia family, Sawada Tsunayoshi is also doing his best to make things right to make up for the sins of the past generation. Celestina knew then that representing the Vongola family is not something she would regret, and so she tries her best to fight for their cause even when she doesn’t understand why at times.

The family has retained her for three years already, recognizing her invaluable service. She is also learning the ways of the mafia, and the things that Sawada Tsunayoshi wanted to change.

Then they called her the second time, asking her to show herself to a potential enemy family. She wasn’t accompanied by any of the ring bearers of the Vongola’s but she was accompanied by an ally family’s boss. She came to learn the existence of Byakuran and the New Millefiore family.

He greeted her by making her recall the labor case she handled that they generously handed to her the winning side. She did not engage him with conversation that would make her easy to read by the other party. To her surprise, the negotiation did not consist of crafting a deal with another party or the government. It became an interrogation against a person she personally knew. A traitor within the ranks whose father disinherited him for working with the government.

The real nature of Celestina’s training under her mentor came to light. People are the same, whether they be of the surface or the underground. They fear being subjected to a lot of pain, and her mentor theoretically taught her how to make people spill secrets by inflicting their worst fears. She didn’t use it even in desperate times in her line of work but that seemed to change when she stepped inside the dark room.

She never employed the methods because everything done is the loophole in the rules, defeating the intent of those good men who crafted the fundamental laws of the land.

The medicine won’t be traced in the man’s body. Naturally occurring chemicals in a human’s body won’t get too much suspicion. Celestina stared the person across her, recalling the first time she worked with him. It was during an internship in the District Attorney’s Office. She sat across him while they waited for the orientation, exchanging pleasantries. While he made her uncomfortable years ago when he was arrogantly presenting to her his credentials (filthy rich family, prestigious schools, impressively high grades), he made her uncomfortable now with the knowledge that the still body across her is a dead person.

She used his fear to her advantage. Byakuran reviewed the encoded list of names and places the captive confessed before the drug made his body produce too much hormone that led to his death. He was so happy and energetic that one would think he was sharing his own jokes with Celestina during their exchange.

Reborn and Yuni came a minute too late. Their captive was already heaving his last breaths, hand hitting his chest to give way for the much needed air. Celestina watched with tears in her eyes the plight of her colleague.

His last words was actually for someone who helped his captors kill him. “Do not blame yourself.” Celestina saw how he gladly welcomed death, glad that they finally granted it to him. She recognized that expression. It was the one her mother usually wears after her father finally confessed about another affair that he would end.

Celestina felt like throwing up but she wouldn’t.

It was Reborn who approached her first. “They will dispose the body later. Tsuna sent me here to get you back to the base.” Celestina remained in her spot. She shook her head. “The Vongola didn’t think it was an interrogation that will lead to this.”

“Let me look at him.” Celestina remained firm in her decision that surprised Reborn.

“You can forget this-”

“No. I will look at him until I can see it in my mind’s eye.” Reborn gaped at the fire burning in her eyes when she turned to him to swat his hand. Her eyes narrowed at him in a glare, her resolve burning into her very core until it would leave ashes of self-loathing.

Reborn looked away in pity.

“Federico is a heartless bastard for dragging you into this.” Celestina remained unimpressed. She doesn’t need the pity of a dying man. “Why did you accept this job?”

“Would you like to have some light in this room?” She turned on the flashlight and gave him an idea on what is happening to his broken leg, puss coming out of the lacerated skin that is turning a shade of violet. He fell before the Millefiore captured him and they didn’t bother healing his wound. He screamed in anguish, the light from the flashlight unsteady.

Why? She wondered too. She accepted this client because of the notion that mafia families get filthy rich by committing crimes intentionally. The reason goes back to her family, really. She wanted to discover at what point committing a sin become normal that it could be a routine. Her father lacked the contempt and shame she wanted to see in him every time he apologized to her mother for adultery.

Reborn finally acquiesced. “For what?”

Celestina doesn’t really know anymore. But the fact that these men could admit that this is something that is shameful and prohibited made her believe that they are more virtuous than the men who walk in her world. “I want to understand-” She placed a hand on her chest where her heart felt so heavy. She witnessed a lot of crime scenes, investigated bodies of dead humans in morgue, and heard the cries of loved ones. However, she still could not see how some people could repeatedly do the same act without feeling a heavy burden, “-why he can keep doing it and go home as if he is a clean man.”

Reborn could not offer any answers to her because he grew up knowing that the ways of the mafia are normal. He never bothered understanding because he knew he wouldn’t. It was foolish of her to think that she could find answers for a man’s actions in their world.

She refused to look in the mirror for days after the incident. Perhaps the feared monster in the closet was her all along. It was the only logical reason she could come up. How else could she thrive inside the dark closet for hours as a child?

For the first time in years, she appeared in Gokudera’s apartment with a bottle of whiskey. He wondered what happened but he did not ask and she did not tell him anything. She got drunk after five shots and fell asleep on the dining table.

O~O~O

The eighth was not as inhumane. But she did not get out of it unscathed.

Sawada Tsunayoshi couldn’t look at her in the eye when he was briefing her about the situation. She sat on the couch as he presented to her a clip. Her hands held on the piece of black cloth tightly, palms sweating with cold sweat.

Her mentor, bless his soul, may have been known in the field of law as an outstanding lawyer who could easily win most cases given to him. However, he is known as having prevented parties from getting to full blown litigation- one that the mafia would prefer to avoid publicity.

One of the Decimo’s guards had acted out of necessity when he landed a fatal blow on their attacker while returning to Sicily. They were passing by the town under the protection of a neutral family, Castellano. The attacker, perhaps thinking that they would be invaded, blocked the passage of the Vongola boss and his subordinate. The dash cam of Tsunayoshi’s vehicle had caught the scene, of the attacker dressed in some leather jacket with the Castellano family’s seal that only a few talented members possessed. The attacker had shouted some words, brought out his pump action shotgun and started shooting some of Tsunayoshi’s guards. Three were dead, and five were injured. The attacker made a mistake of turning to one of the approaching Vongola guards, leaving his other vulnerable for attacks. A dagger hit the attacker’s neck. He fell within seconds.

Celestina couldn’t see the flames coating the bullets and the dagger. She wasn’t able to see the cloud flames coating the dagger’s blade making it possible for a critical blow.

She would lie if she would say that she’d be happy to clear Sawada Tsunayoshi culpability with a million or whatever price the other party would settle for. But this isn’t her first time. She turned to Tsunayoshi, his eyes looking everywhere but her, the dark bags under them contrasting the sun deprived skin of the young boss. “This would be hard, Mr. Tsunayoshi.” She was frank.

“Margarette Castellano threatened to declare war if we do not give the Lightning Guardian and a few million dollars.” Tsunayoshi sighed in defeat, shoulders slumping as he collapsed on the chair. “Lambo is too young to be held in hostage. They might even use him for any means.” He glanced at Celestina, the only civilian in the room. “You shouldn’t even be here!”

Celestina raised a brow. “Margarette Castellano demanded you personally hand over the payment?” Tsunayoshi nodded. Margarette Castellano, the hot headed first child of the family, appears in most gala and parties to represent the Castellano. “Why didn’t Pablo Castellano, the current boss, communicated with you? I have not heard of any news that he handed the family to one of his children, and retired.”

She had seen Margarette in a casino years ago. Her mentor pointed the energetic lady in the group beside them. Margarette seemed so confident and wise but she is cautious. She wouldn’t play the game when she knows that the stakes are low.

Celestina and Federico deemed that she is not a person they would have a hard time dealing with. She may be a careful person but her drive is power. She would be willing to lose if there is a scapegoat. She wouldn’t be making a move unless she cannot find someone willing to do things for her.

Tsunayoshi gave her a look of apprehension, and called for Gokudera and Hibari inside the room. The two guardians differently voiced out their surprise at the plan.

Hibari stayed by the corner, near the door. He remained the aloof cloud, and merely regarded Celestina whenever Tsuna would point to her.

Gokudera remained doubtful but knew better than to argue with his boss who had already made up his mind.

Preparations were made, and it was agreed that Hibari would be the first Vongola to scout the area for any ambush. Gokudera and Celestina would be the one who would face Margarette Castellano and negotiate to keep the peace.

Celestina placed the black cloth over her eyes and tied it securely around her head, much to the men’s surprise.

Hibari raised a brow at the lawyer. His keen eyes couldn’t be fooled by the way she tried to keep her breathing steady. She closed her opened her hands on her lap, clearly not one to be comfortable in this kind of situation.

But small animals trust each other’s capabilities.

Gokudera became Celestina’s guide when the latter was blindfolded. The building was not the main headquarters. It was one of the secret base that only the guardians have access. Gokudera saw the frown and his boss’ knitted brows as he closed the door with his left hand while he held Celestina’s arm with the other. The storm guardian could only sigh helplessly.

Sawada brought their lawyer with a blindfold, and removed it only when they were inside the study. The Vongola boss kept on asking for her forgiveness every ten minutes during the car ride. Celestina tried to make things lighter by trying to initiate a car ride game but the only game that she could think of was, ‘I spy.’ She opted to have a nice conversation about her childhood.

It wasn’t really that much of putting the listener to a happier mood, considering it was about her losing to her siblings in a game of tag and as punishment she would be placed in the ‘haunted closet of the house’ for two hours, blindfolded while her hands were tied so she couldn’t escape.

(They stopped imposing that kind of punishment when her younger sibling was already 15.)

“Did you overcome your fear of darkness because of that?” Sawada asked, quite confused. She could imagine him blinking twice, head tilted slightly to the side in inquiry.

She did not tell her client that the more she lost in their game, the more time she spent in the darkness. At times, her imagination would run wild, and other times, her siblings would find her asleep. She couldn’t remember the number of times she had imagined some monster appearing from behind her and opening a new dimension where she would be eaten. She couldn’t even remember what kind of place she imagined she would be in once she removed her blindfold- as if any moment she would be transported to a whole new dimension and be their ruler.

“I am really not afraid of the dark, Mr. Sawada.” Celestina chuckled fondly. She leaned against the backrest sluggishly. “I just couldn’t bear the thought of my younger brother undergoing that kind of punishment, especially when he sleeps with a night lamp. My older sister, well-” She shrugged, “-I just can’t seem to win against her.”

But most of all, she doesn’t want her siblings to hear the hushed conversations of her parents, trying their best not to be the first to show emotion. She couldn’t forget how her mother nearly lost it when her father admitted to the accusations and simply offered an apology. She couldn’t see it, but she could only imagine as she hears the words.

O~O~O

Gokudera guided Celestina inside the car, making sure she is seated comfortably first. He went to the driver’s seat and fastened her seatbelt for her before doing the same for him. “Are you all right, woman?”

Celestina’s expressionless face unnerved him. Had it not for the steady rise and fall of her chest, he would have thought she is a blindfolded mannequin. “It’s unusual of you to worry about me, Hayato.”

Gokudera snorted. “Negotiations won’t start if you are feeling unwell.” He flicked her forehead. This would have passed as a normal work day but Celestina is blindfolded. He had to guide her on their way to the car. She almost bumped her head with the roof of the car but fortunately, Gokudera was able to shield her head on time.

For the record, it is not unusual for him to worry about her. And vice versa.

She exaggerated sounds of discomfort. “I think this will form a bump.” She gently touched the area. “The other party will laugh at me, and they won’t take me seriously.”

Gokudera simply rolled his eyes. Sometimes, he wonders why he enjoys her company despite her being a smart aleck.

During the drive to the Castellano base, he would occasionally glance at her just to see if she would attempt to remove her blindfold or adjust it just so she could take a peek. Just like when they give her some case to work on and he leaves her in his study, no one is stopping her from going through his files but she would stay in her area and work silently.

She didn’t do anything about the blindfold.

Her hands weren’t bound to anything, and there is no threat to her life if she would really remove her blindfold. But the way she tapped her fingers on her lap made Gokudera just drop the question he was itching to ask since he saw her in the office.

She was not scared. But there’s something that has been bothering her.

“Are you angry?” Gokudera could see five of their men blending with the crowd in the street they just passed by.

The tapping of her finger stopped. “It’s not anger. It’s more of me reliving a distant memory, I think.” But then she remembered being inside the closet of her parents’ room, she remembered that she imagined them locking the door of the room to discuss about their finances, the way a creative manager keeps on coming back to her father’s office, and her mother’s muffled cries. “I was inside a dark closet, hands bound and blindfolded when I heard my parents almost getting a divorce.” A few months ago, Gokudera finally shared why he hated seeing people lumped together and gossiping, especially maids. She held his hand then, gave it a squeeze and treated him ice cream because really, she doesn’t know what was appropriate to say.

Gokudera thought then that she would push him away for being a bastard. She stayed with him until his mood got better. She almost joined him drinking but he couldn’t bear the thought that she just forced herself to drink something that she cannot withstand. Her presence was enough to soothe him.

One of his hands reached for Celestina’s cold hand, giving it a comforting squeeze. He doesn’t really know what to say because he didn’t grow up in a normal family.

Celestina welcomed his gesture. “At present, it’s not really bothering me now.” She shrugged, head slightly tilted to the side. “It became the usual. Mama said that papa always chooses to come to us. That’s what matters.” There was a lingering sadness in her voice.

Through the years, Gokudera mastered the art of reading a person’s words, decoding the underlying meaning. It helped him find the right information for the family. Even the walls of their manor talk. The maids serving the Vongola manor and the other staff have their way with words too, and he knows when they should be admonished for spreading such. Working with Celestina and actually befriending her makes her easy to read for him.

“Anyway,” She let go of his hand. “I’m fine now. I’m just glad that you are accompanying me this time and not Mr. Hibari. He may have allowed me to do what I see is proper but I can’t help but feel some menacing aura behind me every time I hesitate when we were talking with the Shimokawa’s.” He placed his hand on the steering wheel after the story. “Hayato, no matter what I say or do, just act as if it was according to plan.” Not that she would need to remind him, but this is Vongola. Between his faith in her abilities and the family, he would always choose the latter.

Gokudera parked the car a few meters away from the construction area. “All right, but I will not agree if it will not give favor to the Vongola.”

Celestina remained in her seat even when she felt Gokudera’s hand unbuckling her seatbelt. He made sure not to touch any area that would seem so indecent. “No, we will make it look like they have the upper hand, if the conversation goes there. But I want Margarette Castellano to think that she should succumb to us first before we go to that topic.”

His hands were now untying the knot of her blindfold. “She seems confident that Don Vongola would succumb to her. No one wants war, after all. And Decimo’s gentle nature is really not a secret within your family.” She felt some strands of her hair were pulled out thanks to the now tight knot of her blindfold. It was giving Gokudera a very difficult time.

“Yes, and some families are stupid enough to think that it is a sign of weakness.” Gokudera cursed when he saw that she tightly tied the blindfold. Who would do such thing to herself?

“But then, someone like Margarette wouldn’t dare do something like this if she intends to really declare-Hey! That is starting to hurt!”

Gokudera held her head with one hand to keep her still. “You tied it to so securely, woman! I don’t know if I should be impressed at your spirit or cry at your stupidity!” He finally untied the blindfold, but of course some strands of her hair became a casualty. He would have said something more, but then their gazes met, noses just a few millimeters away from the other.

“I’ve been thinking, you have nice eyes, Hayato.” Of course of all the things that she would think of given the moment, she would rather think of his eyes. It bothered him that she smiled warmly while she described it as she stared at his orbs as if his eyes were the most important things in the world.

Gokudera cleared his throat. “Those are just eyes, woman! Stop focusing on other things and think of the situation you are in!” He quickly got out of the car, and slammed his door shut. He blew air from his mouth, aching to have a smoke. From his periphery, he could see that his cheek was slightly tainted with a reddish hue.

He locked the car when Celestina closed the front door. Some of the men working in the construction gave them a wary look. They knew who Gokudera was, and the latter knew better than to believe that those men wearing helmets were mere minimum wage workers.

(He remembered meeting Tsuna’s father for the first time. He wore almost the same attire as these men.)

He walked to Celestina, putting an arm on her shoulder for good measure. He glared at the men who decided to continue with their work on the building.

When they were out of earshot, Celestina released a sigh. Her tensed body became more relaxed, and that was when Gokudera pulled away from her, maintaining a respectable distance. “They were assessing us, weren’t they?” She stopped herself midway from turning back to those men to check if they were watching the two of them walk towards a warehouse.

“Don’t worry, they wouldn’t dare.” Gokudera lit a cigarette and placed his lighter back in his pocket. He checked if his box weapon was in his pocket just to be sure. “And if anything really happens, I will protect you.”

Celestina chuckled at that. “If someone heard us, you sounded like a boy from a teen flick movie.” She placed her hands behind her, wishing that she was at least allowed to bring her bag so she could fumble on something.

Gokudera chuckled in response. But her hand stopped trembling that it eased him.

The gates opened, and she wondered how Castellano can be so sure that they were the ones sent by the Vongola. The inside was a typical warehouse, and the staff wore the proper uniform.

The place reminded her of the first manslaughter case she handled many years ago. The victim was a studious eleven year old lured to the place by some of her so called friends who wanted to give her some fun. She defended the accused well in court even when she, herself, was not convinced of his innocence.

Celestina could feel her heart beating rapidly inside her chest, and this- cold sweat, heavy breathing, and unexplainable fear of the unknown- may have been what the poor victim felt, and Celestina mocked such horrible experience by saving the man from any liabilities.

“Stay close to me, Celestina.” Hayato whispered to her. Two men led them to a little shed just behind the warehouse. He was glad that she easily complies with whatever instructions they would give her.

From behind them, the sounds of the ongoing construction dissolved into a white noise.

O~O~O

Gokudera watched how Celestina easily took the helm of negotiations with a cunning and shrewd Margarette Castellano. Any sane person would have been intimidated by Margarette’s display of her best assassins, and the growling lightning leopard let loose from its box weapon. The animal and the assassins were eying Celestina as if the Vongola sent a meal to them.

He didn’t know if he should be proud or be scared of Celestina’s psychological health. At this point, she was even giving Margarette such a sweet smile.

“Ho? Did you misinform your lawyer and told her a different set of facts, Vongola’s right hand?” Margarette turned to Hayato, shaking her head dejectedly. “I didn’t know that the Vongola are not only a bunch of cowards, but also a bunch of liars!”

Gokudera simply shrugged. “Provocation will not lead you anywhere, Castellano.” Had this been said to him ten years ago, he would have thrown a dynamite at them. “And weren’t you listening to her? She made it clear that she is here to write down the agreement we have come up with, and not to negotiate with you. The Vongola demands that you give five billion euros and turn-over five of your casinos in the border. It was clearly your fault that Decimo was attacked. You have mismanaged your men, Margarette.”

Margarette’s smirk turned to a frown instantly. “Where is your boss? If he is really sincere in preventing a war, then he would be the one talking to me.”

Gokudera leaned comfortably against the backrest of the sofa, making sure to be slightly nearer to Celestina in case the other side decided to talk with weapons. “And if you are really sincere with your threats, then why did your boss not contact Decimo?” He saw the surprised look in Margarette’s face. She started tapping her finger on the armrest of her seat. The two assassins behind her exchanged looks. “Perhaps you are acting beyond your authority, Margarette.”

“How about you tell your client that until he shows up here, then my family wouldn’t see his sincerity to settle matters?” Margarette turned to Celestina, glaring at the civilian caught in between them. “Isn’t that what you lawyers teach in your law subjects?”

“I’m afraid your mentor in those subjects may have been remised in teaching you, Ms. Margarette.” Celestina countered. “The act of sending a representative when the other party initiates a talk through someone who is merely governing a part of the head’s affair is acting in good faith.” The lawyer hoped that if the other party would search for whatever principle she just spewed out, then some sort of legal basis would really appear.

Margarette laughed at her mockingly. “There are no rules in war.”

“But you are not in war, at least not yet.” Celestina pointed out. “The one who shall declare a war would be the boss of the respective family.” Margarette’s expression visibly hardened. She stopped tapping her fingers in favor of clenching a fist. “Unless you are given some authority formally by your boss.”

“We will not come up with any terms unless your boss comes here personally.” Margarette changed the topic, her calm composure crumbling before the two outsiders.

Celestina sighed loudly as she followed Gokudera’s example of standing up.

“Then it is clear that you really have no intention to talk.” Gokudera glowered at the group. “We shall tell the boss of what has transpired. Then we will send a letter to Castellano and demand an explanation of your insulting behavior.” He led Celestina towards the door.

Celestina leaned close towards Gokudera and whispered, “Walk faster.”

Gokudera didn’t understand the reason but he did nonetheless. When they were near the door that they heard Margarette’s high pitched voice.

“Please, let’s not be hasty here.”

The triumphant look on Celestina’s face told Gokudera that things were according to her plan. She steeled her expression into a look of disinterest. For a moment, Gokudera feared that her method would fail and they would be the ones who would go back begging the other side.

“We have another meeting scheduled, one more important than this.” Gokudera made a show of looking at his watch before giving his attention to Margarette.

The façade was thrown and the woman before them wore an anxiety in her face. “The Castellano will drop the demands.” She proposed finally. “I cannot hand over the casinos at the border, however.” It is the main source of their livelihood, and with the looming threat of a war with the Gesso, thanks to her carelessness, Margarette couldn’t really fail at this deal. If she messed up, her father will be involved and she would be a laughing stock in her family. The damages she demanded from the Vongola were supposed to fund her escape if the Gesso really declares war and when her family would kill her.

“Then, we have nothing to talk about. Let’s leave.” Gokudera opened the door, but the two guards already showed their weapons. He pulled Celestina closer to him.

“It’s a blessing that Decimo treated my demands as something not coming from the boss.” Margarette glowered at them. She stood her full height and motioned for the soft sofa in front of her where the two Vongola representatives sat. “Let’s talk or there will be blood.”

Celestina stiffened but she regained her composure. “If you will make good of your threat, then all the more reason for the Vongola to communicate with your boss. One of his own is making a hasty decision and giving us a display of her poor handling of matters.” Margarette scowled at her but she motioned for her men to drop their weapons. “And we are the ones giving the terms here. Give us the number of the casinos you are willing to give. The Vongola wants five.” Then it was Celestina who made a display of glancing at her watch. “Oh look, we have thirty minutes left before we meet with the Varia.” No reaction from Margarette, and she turned to Gokudera. “Or was it the Shimon family-” She glanced at Margarette, still no reaction. There are only three families she heard from Tsuna that is making it complicated for the Castellano, at least in this part of their operations. “-Or perhaps the Gesso? Forgive me, I have forgotten the itinerary.”

Margarette pursed her lips. “One! One of the casinos and the one nearest Sicily.”

Gokudera seemed to like the outcome of this. “We will meet with the Gesso later.” He ignored Margarette’s outburst first. “Five casinos, contiguous with the Vongola territory in Naples along with five billion euros as damages.” He demanded.

“Three casinos and ten billion euros.” Margarette countered.

“Five casinos and ten billion euros.” Gokudera remained firm with the casinos.

“Five casinos, and five billion euros.” Margarette gave in. “Those in the Naples.”

Gokudera glanced at Celestina. “Send to them the contract tomorrow.”

Celestina nodded. “Thank you for your hospitality.” She paused, opening the door of the little shed so those inside would see the newcomers. “However, I think I do not need to send the contract to anyone now that Vongola Decimo and Castellano Nono had reached an understanding.”

“Boss, what a pleasant surprise! We just reached an agreement here.” Gokudera greeted.

Margarette screeched. She took out her gun in rage and pointed it at Gokudera. “You played me! I specifically told in the letter not to get father involved!” She shot without thinking. There was a body falling but Gokudera still stood in front of her with no injuries. The only casualty is his suit stained with another’s blood.

“Seize her!” Castellano don ordered the men who obliged.

Celestina held her shoulder. The skin burned and the bullet had entered her through there successfully. Had Margarette been in the proper state of mind, like her client years ago in that manslaughter case, she would have aimed better. She was losing too much blood and Celestina watched with morbid fascination how the bleeding won’t stop. Her blood stained the fur carpet, and she wondered if this was the victim’s last thought before she died.

And then she could hear Margarette’s screams, begging her father not to do this. They were calling for medics, and when she turned to lie more comfortably on the floor, she could see the hazy image of Gokudera’s face, scowling at her. He might have said something but she couldn’t really hear it. She removed her hand from her shoulder just to confirm if it was indeed her sticky blood but she couldn’t raise it for more than a few seconds because her shoulder hurt and she chose to groan in pain than to apply pressure on the wound.

It was when she felt his callous hand pressing on her shoulder, muttering to her that she would be okay. She chuckled, and she wondered if she was really able to tell him that at least he wouldn’t be bothered to blindfold her, and that he really has a pair of very beautiful eyes.

Gokudera pressed firmly on her shoulder, pulling away only when the sun users arrived. From behind him, Castellano was making amends and apologizing to Tsuna nonstop. The white furred carpet still held the sign of casualty. A civilian’s blood was shed on the floor of this shed. No matter how much he tried to reason out what happened, Gokudera still felt some sort of anger at what happened to Celestina.

The white of the carpet reminded him of the gentle locks of the woman who taught him how to play the piano years ago. He remembered how those gentle eyes looked at him with sincerity and touched him with warmth.

He raised his hand to the light, stained with carmine. He wondered just how mentally sane Celestina was to even see some beauty in him.

He wondered if his mother wished that his father was beside him during her final moments.

They were (Celestina is still alive) so beautiful until the mafia stained them.

Chapter Text

Celestina stared at her reflection. She woke up in one of the Vongola guest rooms in the main mansion with explicit orders to stay in bed and recover. They assured her that matters have already been taken cared.

The beautiful woman with light pink hair greeted her when she woke up three days ago. She forced Celestina to stay in bed or else she would give her a cake that would really put her to sleep. The medicine they have given her still made her feel groggy and so without any more protests, Celestina closed her eyes and rested.

Three days of rest and Celestina still felt like a boulder was resting on her back. She was given fifteen minutes to freshen up before they would give her another batch of medicine and check-ups. She found Dr. Shamal really professional but he seemed to like to give an impression that he is a pervert when Gokudera is around.

Her wound was reduced to a scar. How that happened within a span of three days, she doesn’t know. Gokudera told her, rather grumpily, that it was because of the Vongola talent and technology. Her sleep induced mind had registered his growls and impolite demeanor towards her than the explanation he offered.

She shook her head and lightly slapped her cheeks. She ran a finger on her long scar one last time before she went inside the shower.

O~O~O

Bianchi waited while Celestina was in the bathroom. She arranged the flowers I-pin and Lambo had picked from the garden that morning. Poison scorpion doesn’t really like watching over the patients in her free time. She would rather spend some time with Reborn, but Hayato (not so) subtly requested her to keep perverted doctors (Shamal) from assaulting a harmless civilian, and some other harm that may come. Not that the main mansion is not safe.

She would have delegated such task to I-pin and Lambo. I-pin is skilled enough to at least prevent Shamal from really doing anything (not that he is serious about those empty threats). However, according to Ryohei, Hayato stayed until the medics have finished with her operation. And through the grumpy, sleep-deprived state of her brother, he threatened throwing a dynamite at her if something bad happens to Celestina, or something.

Bianchi was interested, so to say. The first impressions she had on Celestina disproved every expectation in her mind. Most women that Gokudera ‘dated’ are sultry and feisty and they are the standard of beauty. He never needed to pursue them for they come to him.

Celestina, however, seemed to be far different from what Bianchi pictured as someone Hayato would fancy. If the word fancy would still suit Hayato in his age. But for the past few days, she couldn’t figure out how a civilian like her could invoke so much emotion to Hayato.

Normally, Hayato wouldn’t really be the one to stick by a person’s side until he was assured that said person is safe. Such treatment would be extended to Tsuna and some of the other guardians. Bianchi doubts if she would ever be given the same treatment. She is thankful that Hayato would really bother interacting with her, and acknowledging their little family in gatherings.

(He would only give polite greetings to his father and the wife.)

Bianchi had read the information they have gathered on Celestina. The lawyer is as boring as a civilian would see, but someone whose life is coveted in their circle- the sensible ones at least. Bianchi once pictured a normal life with Romeo. She was willing to turn her back on the mafia to live a peaceful life with Romeo but he made her build walls around herself as payment for that love. Then she met Reborn who proved to her that living happily doesn’t mean that she would be normal like what Romeo wanted her to be.

Choice is a privilege that Celestina seems to ignore in her everyday life. She would always choose what she thinks would be the right answer for the person she worked for instead of choosing herself. Bianchi wanted to tell her that no one would begrudge her if she asked to be released but that is something she must learn to do.

The bathroom door opened, and Bianchi turned to Celestina with a warm smile. “Are you feeling better now?”

Celestina hesitantly nodded. “Thank you, Ms. Bianchi.” She headed to the vanity, sliding her white blouse slightly downwards to reveal the scar. The lighting in the vanity is better than the one in the bathroom. The scar was more apparent, the skin slightly paler than what it should be. The doctors told her that they could remove the keloid once it was fully healed.

Celestina refused to. She’s not a vain person, and she doesn’t really want to be held up in some place. Work will keep on piling up in the office. Besides, she wanted to keep it as a reminder. When Bianchi informed her that she was the only one injured, Celestina felt like she could move forward and leave the trauma the interrogation incident left her.

She saw Bianchi moved soundlessly behind her, without any sound. Celestina found that in the midst of these people, her tiptoes are the ones creating most sounds. Even most children she had encountered in the mansion could walk normally without a sound.

“Don’t worry, it will be gone.” Bianchi moved to comb Celestina’s hair. It is a nice color of auburn, although the strands are too thin. “If you wear the right top with the right color, the scar wouldn’t be seen.”

Celestina wore the blouse. “No, it’s just that I find it strange.” She straightened, allowing Bianchi to do whatever she pleases with her hair. “I have clients with a more superficial wound, and yet their wounds heal longer. The gunshot wound I received would take two weeks before it could be fully recovered.”

She’s smart, Bianchi mused as she opened the drawer for some hair ornaments. “Perhaps, your body heals fast. You seem to be an energetic one.” The golden clip seemed to be best fit for her hair.

“No, actually I don’t recover that well.” Celestina watched Bianchi work. Meticulously, languidly, and silently. Bianchi may have smooth and unblemished skin but killing anyone doesn’t mean you have to get your hands dirty. “Are you part of the Vongola, Ms. Bianchi?”

Bianchi gently held her hair on one side, inserting the hair ornament securely. The updo was the best choice. “No, I work with them.”

“An ally then.” Celestina concluded. Her face has yet to recover color. “And here I thought those eyes looked familiar.”

“Really?” Bianchi sat on the bed, opening the day’s paper placed on the bedside table. Hayato told the staff to put the daily paper on her bedside. She likes reading the news, and the answering the sudoku puzzles she never got right. “What does my eyes remind you of?”

Celestina turned to Bianchi. “Hayato. You have the same and yet very different.”

“I am his older sister.” Bianchi dropped the bomb. “Hayato’s my father’s bastard.”

Celestina’s eyes widened, her mouth hanging agape. She sighed before she stared at Bianchi, a glint of understanding somehow crossing her features. She pursed her lips. “Hayato is a lovely brother.” She remembered that in the midst of the Hayato’s grumbles and insults, he can be kind in his own ways. When she would be held up due to some matters within the Vongola, Hayato would give her a ride with an excuse that her house is on the way to the club he would go to. Other times, he would not so gently berate her on her too heavy bag filled with papers before roughly swiping said bag from her. It was really a sight to behold- Vongola’s storm guardian sporting a dark designer leather bag specially designed for working women.

Bianchi laughed at the description of her hot headed brother. Handsome, cool, destructive, efficient- yes but never lovely. That would be the least word to describe Hayato.

Lovely is Lambo sparing a grape candy for Tsuna on his birthday. Lovely is I-pin still making sure that Lambo won’t get into trouble even when he shouted her insecurities. Lovely is Reborn, despite his preference for coffee, sharing tea with Celestina just to make sure that she is not experiencing trauma from her latest adventure with Hayato.

But then again, Hayato stopped his destructive lifestyle when she came along. Bianchi connected the dots and found Celestina to be the reason. He stopped constantly buying apartments around town to convince them that he has a life outside the Vongola. He stopped welcoming any woman who pursues him, and stopped finding another when he got bored. He still drinks and smoke but not too much.

“I assure you, my brother is anything but lovely.” Bianchi got up and led Celestina to the bed. The daily paper Hayato required her to put on the bedside table is there. Her things are temporarily placed in Hayato’s study (where she is also working when summoned in the manor) so she won’t work during her recovery stage. A cable TV was placed in her room so she would watch if the daily paper provided her no further entertainment. “Although, he is quite a catch, isn’t he?”

Celestina noted that the sheets were new. Perhaps it was changed while she was inside the bathroom. “Why are you bringing him up, Ms. Bianchi? I don’t suppose you two share a very close bond with each other.” She doesn’t feel very comfortable when Poison Scorpion became very talkative.

“He seemed to care for you.” Bianchi got to the point as she sat on her plush seat beside the bed. Shamal was very late.

“He cares for those important to him.” Celestina corrected, shrugging at Bianchi who waited for her to elaborate. “He may seem violent and always irritated with life in general. But in between his curses and threats, he would act otherwise.” Celestina took the newspaper and the newly sharpened pencil to answer the puzzles in the entertainment section.

Bianchi grabbed her phone and browsed the internet. She decided that Celestina Milano is all right. Reborn is right. There is something unique about the woman for the former chief counsel of the family to highly recommend her services. “I do hope my brother is not giving you trouble. He’s not a team person.”

Celestina stopped writing on the newspaper. “No. Hayato is really impressive in that field.”

He is a genius, and she finds it hard to keep up with him when he starts discussing some matters. But he can be patient (rarely) if one would really show interest in the things he could teach. She is just glad that he hasn’t made good with his threats of blowing her up if she makes him repeat a part of the topic she did not understand in their line of work.

And despite of Hayato’s claims of hating the ‘dumb cow,’ he would make sure that Lambo’s injuries are attended to after the teen’s training. The pains of having security around the school where Lambo and I-pin attends. There is already a ride waiting for Yamamoto to take him to his father after his missions. Tsuna’s itinerary for the day is already set and all he has to do is to conduct the meetings and sign the papers. Hibari would have the comfort of private planes when traveling from Japan to Italy and vice versa because he dislikes crowd and all arrangement regarding security are already handled. Little things that the others think Hayato had no hand in. If Celestina hasn’t been working with him closely, she wouldn’t have known the little things he did for everyone.

“He just doesn’t know how to express his concern for the people around him. I sometimes wonder why he finds it hard to express himself in that aspect.” She shrugged and returned to answering a particularly hard crossword puzzle.

Bianchi wanted to ask more. It is undeniable that she cares deeply for Hayato as his older sister. He may have become the Vongola right hand man, and she trusts his judgment. However, it is not always reliable. She had seen Hayato when his judgment is clouded. Thank heavens it hasn’t involved lovers or his one-night stands. He is careful in that aspect, learning a lot from his father when it comes to being attached to civilians. Even if Hayato insists that he can handle his own affairs well, Bianchi would want to also prevent those who would exploit Hayato’s influence.

It was really hard to ignore him being a bastard, and some colleagues of theirs grew wary of Hayato after learning of such information. He is not the kind to go around and tell his life story anyway, so the look of surprise in Celestina’s face upon learning such is understandable. What baffled Bianchi is that as if the information gave Celestina answers after she had casually dropped the bomb. She wanted to unravel Celestina’s character more (one couldn’t really be sure of a person just by one encounter despite being impressed with said person at that. The mafia had taught her caution), and she wanted to believe that Celestina may really be a genuine person who got unlucky to be brought in this mafia mess-

But Shamal barged in with a huge grin plastered upon his face and announcing his presence to the occupants of the room.

O~O~O

Yamamoto visited Celestina twice during her recovery inside the manor. He brought a basket filled with various fruits. It made him wonder why Gokudera had removed the pears in the basket, and insisted that they shouldn’t be in there just because. He apologized to Celestina for the lack of pears (he may have mentioned that Gokudera may be hungry but is embarrassed to ask) to which the kind lawyer simply laughed.

“So, I heard that Celestina was given the week off after she was discharged.” Yamamoto glanced at the empty table at the side of Gokudera’s study. The area was filled with color coded folders and envelopes. The table has two stacks of papers and a small study lamp. Celestina declared it as her work area. Gokudera protested but it was one of the things she insisted because she wouldn’t want going up and down the stairs just for formalities in the papers she has to make.

It’s not that she uses that often anyway. Work just piled up thanks to the incident. The Varia in particular has accumulated about a hundred charges for the core members. These charges will be dismissed due to lack of evidence. Celestina has a way with defeating the prosecutor’s claims without the Vongola doing underhanded tactics.

(She learned of that from Hayato one fine day. He didn’t mean to disclose such information but he was simply amazed that she could pull off tricks like her mentor. It saved them a lot of cash to be appropriated for other operations. The lawyer they hired between her mentor and Celestina just became their lawyer thanks to connections.

She uncovered the amount- to her horror- and told him to never use such method even if the case will proceed to litigation. Hayato would have given a reply, but she looked like she was about to cry in frustration so he decided to be tact for the first time.)

Hayato grumbled, itching to smoke a pack. For the past few days, he found himself smoking two packs in the balcony.

(He bothered moving the ash tray in the balcony because in the first few weeks Celestina started working with him, she would never say that his smoking habits actually affects her. It made him a little bit guilty that he was the reason of her unending tissue piling on one side of the desk, and her headache.)

He took in less water simply because no one would refill his glass for him.

The maids were actually surprised to see him asking to be served food in the proper time.

All in all, Celestina’s absence made him feel, ironically, just how present she was in his life. And, he missed cooking meals for both of them.

He went out of his room, stayed in the garden and stomped on the greens that reminded him of her eyes, and punched the lovely vase containing red flowers that reminded him of Celestina’s usually messy bun. It doesn’t help that Bianchi would subtly remark on how Hayato seemed to always glance at his side, or smirk at some mundane phrase one of their companions remarked as if he found it hilarious.

“Hayato, are you all right?” Yamamoto asked when he noticed the silver haired Mafioso scowling at the air. “You seem pre-occupied at the moment.”

“Work keeps on piling up, baseball idiot.” Gokudera snapped, scowling at Yamamoto tilted his head in inquiry. “Stop dilly dallying with a certain someone! The sooner she recovers, the sooner she can work for us.”

Yamamoto laughed, and Gokudera knew that there was something different with the way the baseball idiot would not meet his gaze. “Yeah, I kind of figured that out but she has been cooped in there for some days now. The standard procedure is to keep civilians from wandering around, but she also needed some fresh air or company.”

Gokudera saw Yamamoto’s lips twitching upwards, not the wide toothed grin he would give the kids with a promise that everything will be fine whenever the base is under attack. The smile Yamamoto was stupidly wearing is the smile he usually gives his father in a warm welcome after being away for a month-long mission. It was the smile he wore when he won the National Competition and bagged the golden trophy.

“She seemed to need a company that is not Bianchi-san. Have you visited her recently?” Yamamoto asked and it was Gokudera who looked away.

No, Gokudera answered in his head. He couldn’t bear to look at Celestina, cooped up inside a makeshift hospital because doctors outside would surely report a gunshot wound. He couldn’t bear to step foot inside that room knowing that she almost died because he was too worried that the bullet might hit Tsuna. He couldn’t bear see her look at him with fear and disappointment.

He knew she deserved to be placed first by the person she also cares about.

“Celestina seemed relieved that Bianchi left her for two hours.” Yamamoto chuckled at the memory of her begging him not to leave her with poison scorpion. She looked stiff as she tucked herself to sleep, hoping that Bianchi would leave her.  “She did mention that she would probably spend the rest of her sort-of vacation in her house. I’d help her with the packing up if we’re done here.”

Gokudera was certain that they did talk for two hours. Celestina would describe such horrid deals with lighthearted terms she may have invented on the spot. He wanted to lash out at Yamamoto but he knew that his misplaced anger won’t do any good. “Don’t go there, idiot!” He grabbed Yamamoto’s shirt to keep him from opening the door. “Most of the things she’d pack up are just her personal belongings. You’ll make her uncomfortable.”

“I can help her with the heavy things.” Yamamoto slapped away Gokudera’s arm. It was the second raw emotion he had displayed in front of the Storm Guardian.

Gokudera’s eyes turned to slit, brows furrowing. “Don’t start being attached to people, Yamamoto.” He warned. The sunset gave the room a different color, reflecting the bare personality of the occupants. If one would let his eyes be tricked, he could see the red rays of the sun touching Yamamoto’s hands giving it a bloody color. “She’s not one of us.” Gokudera almost whispered. As if his words held some force, he felt his chest clenched tightly. “Don’t get used to her presence.”

Easier said than done.

Practice what you preach.

Gokudera wanted to punch some senses to himself.

“I know that.” Yamamoto looked away. He never would have treated her differently had she responded like Kyoko and Haru upon learning of the nature of their job. “But you can see it too, right Gokudera? You may not notice it, but having her around is not just about covering our work, our sins. We have civilian friends, yes, but it’s different with them.” Yamamoto knew that Gokudera agreed when the bomber let him continue. “Celestina never made me feel that I am drowning in red.”

You don’t have to be someone you are supposed to be at least with me, Mr. Takeshi.

Yamamoto gave Gokudera a grin, and the right hand man hated the fact that he could see some color in the baseball idiot’s face. “Besides, she gave you a reason to move in that apartment so you wouldn’t tire your body. You may not see it but you take care of yourself more now than before.”

When Yamamoto left, Gokudera smoked another pack of cigarette in the balcony. He spent the night reading Yamamoto’s report about an unsuccessful mission that brought down his baseball career a year ago. The one who faced the press about drug charges and homicide being thrown to Yamamoto was Celestina. Although she cleared him of the fact and demanded a huge amount of damages for the besmirched reputation, it affected his baseball career and his chances of going to the major leagues.

“It was for the better.” Yamamoto gave Tsuna a grin as he tried to get up to at least greet Tsuna properly. “At least when I lay low, I can focus on my responsibilities as the Rain Guardian.”

Hayato witnessed Tsuna crack for the first time in years after that encounter.

He remembered Celestina was left in the hospital room. She had given Gokudera updates about Yamamoto’s health progress and the case. It surprised him that Yamamoto, as honest and blunt as he may be, never mentioned a thing nor exhibited some remorse at the situation.

O~O~O

Bianchi watched from Gokudera’s study the source of another two packs being consumed by her brother, this time inside the office. The curtains were drawn, and the exhaust was turned on for the first time in two years. The small space between drawn curtains was Bianchi’s access to the outside world. She feared that her younger brother was getting back to his habits.

Gokudera’s office has a nice view of the porch, fitting for the right hand man to check the guests and the arrival of their allies and members.

The car outside was Yamamoto’s. He insisted on giving Celestina a ride home instead of Gokudera’s subordinate.

Bianchi could only wonder how Celestina was able to get Yamamoto’s attention. Sure, he is a kind hearted individual with instincts suited for mafia, but he won’t go as far as treat her like how he treats his friends. Bianchi had not seen or heard much of Yamamoto’s interactions with her. She turned to Hayato, crossing her arms on her chest. “Yamamoto seemed to be familiar with Celestina.”

Gokudera wondered when Bianchi is on a first name basis with Celestina, but his sister has her ways and sometimes she just does what she wants. He opened another pack, notwithstanding the state of his ash tray being filled with a mountain of ashes and cigarette butts.

Bianchi watched as Celestina tried to get her luggage from Yamamoto who only laughed and ushered her to the front seat. The duo stopped when Celestina turned get a glimpse of Gokudera’s study. Bianchi did not move from her spot. Celestina bit her lip and looked away from the window of the study, her back now facing Bianchi. Her shoulders visibly slumped as she went inside. He placed her luggage at the back seat, and went to the driver’s side to start the engine.

“Are you, by chance, avoiding her?” Bianchi moved away from the window and swiped the cigarette from Gokudera’s hands. She ground the cigarette on the tray before stealing Gokudera’s pack of smoke.

“Give that back to me!” Gokudera growled, cursing when some ashes spilled from the tray.

“At the rate you are smoking, Uri will mistake your desk as the litter box.” Bianchi pointed out, sliding the pack in her back pocket. “Are you bothered that you are spending time with Yamamoto’s girlfriend?”

Gokudera stood from his seat, and headed towards Bianchi. “Yamamoto has no girlfriend.” He casually corrected Bianchi as he opened the door of his study. “Now leave! I have more important things to do.”

Bianchi studied the bright hallways for a couple of seconds before turning her gaze back to Gokudera. “You are unusually unbearable, Hayato.” She leaned against the doorframe, which successfully irritated her brother. “For you to be so particular with her preferences,” She drawled out the syllables just to infuriate him further. “How come you sent your darling sister and yet did not even step foot inside the room when she’s awake?”

Gokudera scowled at Bianchi. He pushed her off the doorframe and slammed the door shut.

Bianchi stared at the fine mahogany door. Her brows furrowed at the strange behavior Gokudera displayed. It’s been a while since he actually threw a tantrum. She knocked at the door three times, and shouted, “You are a coward!”

Of course, she must have the final words. Men are clueless and she needed to point out what they are incapable of doing.

If her brother cares about the people around him, he needs to start learning how to communicate with them. Rejection is part of life, and if they reject him, then they simply don’t deserve him.

Chapter Text

Celestina finally got her phone back after a week of being confined. She turned it on, and was surprised to find that her inbox was filled with messages. Two messages were from her senior partner assuring her that an associate took some of her cases.

Three messages were from her co-counsel (bless Maria, what would she do without her in that messy labor case?) assuring her that she must first take care of her health and that the final stages of mediation with Nesyeth Company is doing well, and that they concluded the contract, the workers approving of the improved provisions three days ago.

She wondered what excuse the Vongola gave. Four messages were from her nephew, mostly about prayers for good health and that the tumor (Celestina wanted to know the mastermind of her alleged illness) will be removed. Five were just from her retained clients about dinner and a free accommodation anywhere in Europe that she could claim anytime.

Yamamoto glanced at Celestina who kept on refreshing her messages every five minutes. “Is work bothering you? We made sure that work outside the Vongola won’t be affected.”

Celestina turned to Yamamoto, shaking her head. “I’m glad that you guys efficiently handled it well.” She opened her inbox and opened her message thread with Gokudera. “It’s a blessing in disguise, I think.” Her screen gave a faint reflection of her neck and collarbone. Her shirt hid most of the scar but she knows that if she moves the material slightly to the side, it is still there. She could imagine her mother fainting at the sight of her blemished skin. “I can have a week to myself with no work to think about. I’ve been meaning,” Her lips curved downward, and she wondered how the screen captured the reflection perfectly, “to slack off for some time now.”

The last message he sent was a week ago, demanding her to come to their meeting place already. She replied with an angry emoji and a crying emoji, telling him how he is such a slave driver and her heels are killing her. He called her right then and there, and she was behind him much to Gokudera’s surprise. The memory should have brought a smile to her face.

Yamamoto laughed. It brought her back to the winding road lined with birch trees and fresh air. “What are your plans then?” He got a glimpse of the person she was about to message. She deleted the words and simply stared at the screen. When she placed the phone on her lap, she turned to him. Yamamoto abruptly faced the road.

“Is Hayato all right?” She finally asked. It bothered her how she never got a glimpse of him during her stay in the manor.

Yamamoto smiled. “He’s fine. He has a lot on his plate, that’s all.” She opened her mouth to say something but decided otherwise. She nodded. He sighed. “I’ll tell you a secret.”

She turned to him, waiting for his next words. “Despite his denial, I saw him once, when everyone is asleep, checked on you. He just has a lot in his plate recently, but I’m sure he’ll be fine.”

“Takeshi,” Celestina stared at the intricately designed gate. The guards confirmed their identity and opened the gates to let them pass. “Is Hayato angry at me? I kind of hurt him, I think.” She remembered green, transparent with raindrops. “I’m sure I did not imagine it. Before I passed out, he looked so confused and angry.”

Yamamoto glanced at her. “Why did you take the bullet for him?” He asked, his grip on the steering wheel tightened.

“Because he will be the one who will get hurt.” Celestina’s hands found the seatbelt. She bit her lip as she remembered Margarette’s rage. It fueled her to grab the gun, and hit any one of those present. Celestina could remember how her heart beat fast that afternoon. All she could think of was that if she’s not quick enough, it would be Gokudera.

Yamamoto remembered the manner of how she said her words. Her tone, as low that it was almost a whisper, was as if she wants to cry out for them who were condemned to such fate.

“Why are you helping me, Ms. Celestina?” Yamamoto remembered how she insisted that they would go to litigation. If proven innocent, then he could redeem himself. The press were always disturbing both of them, and she was starting to be the subject of tabloids. “Despite my loss, the Vongola could still support me.”

“You don’t have to lie to me, Mr. Takeshi.” Celestina sat beside him. “I could care less about your task in the Vongola. I am here as your lawyer. I represent you as who you are and not your position. I wouldn’t be happy if you just give up easily but that is still your choice. But I want you to know that even without this,” She motioned vaguely at the air. “-Mess, you don’t have to be someone who you are supposed to be, at least with me.”

So, security cameras and speed radars be damned (Yamamoto was not really violating some law), the hand nearest to hers moved to hold her cold hand clenched tightly on her side. She turned to him, eyes wide before turning to him. She decided that his warm hand is comfortable against her freezing skin. “Don’t worry about Gokudera.” Yamamoto’s hand moved from her hand to give her shoulder a pat. “He just needs to sort out things with himself.”

He moved his hand back to the steering wheel.

Celestina focused on the road, her mind not leaving the room where the image of green eyes with liquid pools as mellow as the pond reflecting the moon at night.

O~O~O

Three days passed since Celestina was given her forced vacation. Gokudera was glad to be sent on a mission but there was a big mishap and he was now brought to a precinct where human rights have no place even in the dark corners of the interrogation room. For a moment, he was almost convinced that a rival family got a hold of him but from the conduct of his ‘interrogation,’ waterboarding and sleep deprivation (with the occasional physical beating)  is more humane than what those cold hearted bastards could come up with. He knows, because at times he would be the one instructing his subordinates on how to coerce a person to talk.

He made sure that prior to the mission, he has no things that would be traced to the Vongola. He dropped all his weapons when he was certain the police planted rats in the ranks of the factory he visited, only keeping his usual forged IDs- driver’s license, his faculty ID, and his license to practice his profession.

He remained silent, and when they thought he would talk, he would insist on being framed up.

Back in his place, his personal phone he would leave at the table beside his bed, three unread messages were waiting for him to be read.

O~O~O

Celestina decided to accept the fact that she is not comfortable with the lack of stress in her life after three days of vacation. She would rather be cooped up inside her office, preparing pleadings and studying cases instead of being left alone with her thoughts.

On the fourth day of her vacation, she decided to use the pool at her backyard for once. She only remained inside the pool for thirty minutes before she went back inside to contact the law office, asking (begging) for work.

Her friend told her that she needed to rest.

Her boss answered her call, worry lacing his tone. When he found that she was simply asking for a return, he announced to the office that she is banned from entering the premises for the rest of the week, and most of them blocked her number.

She left her house, and walked aimlessly around the neighborhood.

Yamamoto had treated her to dinner for two days before he went home to Japan. He never accepted any offer to join the major leagues, which really disappointed her (not that she is a fan of baseball but he is not just any baseball player). The family is more important, he said.

She left the block and idly wondered where the nearest club was. Perhaps she assumed much about Hayato’s chivalry and concern that their lawyer would be mugged along the way.

She passed five blocks and there were no signs of even any club. The only good thing she was able to get from this forced vacation and ex-communication from her office (she would raise that in one of her conversations with her boss) is that she got a chance to explore the place where she lives.

She concluded that they placed her in a very safe, wholesome, alcohol-free and noise-free community- all according to her preferences and for their sanity.

O~O~O

Gokudera’s wounds were healed by sun users. Only bruises were left, and some cuts that were healing naturally. Chrome arrived and rescued him. The police officer who headed the operation was about to be discharged due to insubordination because he keeps on opposing his superiors regarding some operations blatantly owned by the mafia.

He had guts, Gokudera would give him that. And principle.

But his principle led him to the deepest trenches of the Mediterranean, along with his men.

He arrived at his apartment, feeling like a ball and chain was attached to his leg. He dragged himself to the kitchen, opting to relieve his parched throat. Two days of waterboarding after hours of sleep deprivation and he wasn’t able to get enough water for his body.

He opted to quench his thirst with the driest whiskey in his bar, ignoring the acid in his stomach. The warmth it created in his body at least soothed his senses. He slid down the floor, moaning in pain. The wounds may have been healed but he, oddly, could still feel the stinging sensation of having dirt penetrate even his shallowest wounds.

It usually happens, after being kept in detention, tortured and being subjected to pain. He was trained to endure such situation even before he vowed to protect Tsuna. However, the aftermath of being subjected to such (suffering is such a heavy word especially if he willingly let himself be in such a situation) methods, the phantom wounds still echoes for him to feel them.

He took another swig. He didn’t bother putting it on a glass and instead consume the alcohol straight from the bottle.

Outside, the air sung to him a lullaby. The music it created is like a mother’s hum which made him a little more scared. The mother he knew was the one they called ‘madame’ back in the mansion where he grew up. She doesn’t have the same olive eyes that haunted his dreams. She in fact, has a pair of lovely gray eyes that one couldn’t help but admire.

Gokudera cannot gaze at those deep eyes for more than ten seconds. They are like clouds that will send a storm enough to wipe out a small island. Those eyes are lovely, yes, but he never felt secure.

Looking back, perhaps, it was his roots that made him feel so insecure with the ‘madame.’

Having had enough of those depressing thoughts, he heaved himself off the floor and placed the bottle of whiskey back at the shelf of the bar. He dragged himself to his room, feeling the world around him spin with every step he took. He started peeling off his clothes as he headed to the shower to rid himself of the grime and filth and the darkness of the cell.

His clothes would be shredded into pieces before he would burn them in his balcony. But that could be done tomorrow.

When he emerged from the shower, a little bit refreshed and more aware of his surroundings, he knew better than to drink pain killers with only whiskey filling his stomach. He finally checked on his neglected cellphone, sending a coded message to his boss before checking for his inbox.

Celestina sent a message with only an apology he knew he didn’t deserve. She also left a voice mail. When he opened it, he decided to grab some casual clothes instead of his pajamas. He should have tucked himself to sleep but he knew he had to drive to her place.

She was telling him how she was banned from her work place for the week, and how they have blocked her number for the first five minutes of her call.

He could imagine her walking the neighborhood, not giving up even though she practically walked five train stops not until she could have found that ‘club’ he would use as an excuse to give her a ride home. At some point in her monologue, there was a stray cat who ungratefully scratched her after she saved the poor thing, and being chased by an odd looking dog-rat. How and where, Gokudera didn’t want to know.

“Idiot.”

Gokudera placed the voicemail on speaker so he could drive.

The club was just some lame excuse because since they went out for some “furniture shopping,” he did not find the need to get some quick fix in the form of a nameless woman. Even his so called friends recognized the change. Sawada once pointed out that Gokudera has been taking care of himself lately which greatly relieved the kind hearted boss.

Gokudera himself doesn’t know when it started. Celestina is a keen person that surprised him and amused him. She noticed slight changes in his mood, in his habit that she actually bothered asking him what is troubling him. She would listen to whatever he would allow her to hear. Once, he told her that he killed innocent civilians due to some fake intel. He already smoked two packs then, and she simply embraced him. Her warmth transferred to him and he wondered why she didn’t pull away even when he already accepted the fact that he is a monster.

When she cried with him, Gokudera knew that he hated seeing her look so miserable.

“ I’m sorry if I have done anything to hurt you. Perhaps, I got in the way with things that you have to handle more paperwork and mess than what is necessary and usual. I should have tackled you, or pulled you out of the way.

I have to admit that I was scared that time. It was my first time negotiating in a construction site where I can be buried- that is not to say I do not trust that you can protect. In fact, I do, hence I allowed you guys to blindfold me and lead me to someplace. I really enjoyed working for you guys, despite the chaos and borderline ethical issues.

The Decimo is really, really kind to me. He always gives me an option not to and would hesitate to make me things that are unconventional.

I really appreciate how you are patient enough for me to keep up as well. If I did something to make your job harder, I can make amends but I couldn’t bear the thought of you being disappointed in me. I do enjoy your company even if most of the time we spent is by sharing papers and arguing the best method of covering your contracts.

It’s not your fault, you know? I should have known that you are capable of defending yourself. It was my foolishness and short sightedness that messed things up. No one gives me updates on what has transpired and your sister is tightlipped on the affair.”

Gokudera made a sharp turn, ignoring the long hunk he received from a vehicle he cut off. She shouldn’t be feeling guilty for being deliberately ignored by him because of his guilt. He couldn’t bear to even look at her because-

He saw Margarette drew her gun that moment.

He didn’t care if he would be the one who will take the shot because Tsuna is his boss.

What he didn’t see is that Celestina taking the bullet for him without even thinking.

And he promised her that nothing bad would happen to her.

He glanced at the phone when there was a pause but he could hear her sniff. She shouldn’t be crying for someone like him.

“Yeah, and it’s amazing if this voicemail still reaches this part of my monologue or whatever this is. I don’t really know why I am doing this and I hate the feeling I get whenever I cannot process what disturbs me.

I remember your eyes before I passed out. I’m sure it was not me hallucinating. It’s probably a humiliating sight, and you can laugh all you want. Me bleeding on the fur carpet- poor animal that was harmed for that product, or you know it could have gotten its revenge on the hunters- moaning in pain and nose filled with what may have been snot.

Anyway, you shouldn’t have that somber expression especially when you have such beautiful eyes and-“

The voicemail was cut off.

He would gladly tell her that it has a fifteen minute limit. Voicemails.

He reached her gates after ten minutes. He cursed when he heard a loud bang and shattered glass. He even loved his car but after the tail lights were shattered, it seemed that he has to buy a new one. He closed the door of his car, wobbly walking towards Celestina’s front door. He never thought that her door was that far- it felt like he walked for two miles.

Then he knocked on the door.

Celestina opened it for him, grinning at him. “Haya-”

Gokudera’s face was pale. He glared at her, leaning against the doorframe for balance. “Don’t ever feel like you are at fault. I don’t deserve it.” He said a few more incoherent words before he threw up, and fell on the floor unceremoniously.

Gokudera realized two things that night. One, the thought of having someone like Celestina place him before her own safety is addicting in a good way. He wanted to drown in that euphoria because perhaps this is what love feels like.

Two, it would kill him if she does any of that foolishness again because he only wants to see her safe and happy. She doesn’t deserve any pain and it pains him that he caused her so much pain in one night.

 O~O~O

Celestina knew that being an introvert would be inconvenient one day. As a student, she had told herself many times that extroversion is not a factor in communicating with people or forming connections that could help her in her profession. As a lawyer, she relied mainly on her skills and some practiced opening lines for a small talk for her to thrive in social situations.

 She’s not really the kind to party at night and get home drunk. She values her peace. She values being alone because it gives her comfort and ease.

 When Gokudera knocked on her door, she couldn’t explain why she couldn’t bring herself to turn the knob at her grasp. She had to take a few deep breathes before she finally opened the door, her feet felt like led as she stood rooted on her spot.

 Gokudera’s eyes were droopy. He was panting, like he ran from his house (she had no idea where) to her place. There was a layer of sweat covering his forehead. His silver locks were damped. He looked pale, as if he just got out of some fight where some gangsters beat the hell out of him.

 Thankfully, it was just her wild imagination. The tired took in his eyes could mean that he was just stressed with life in general. His skin was unblemished and some of the scars marring his arms were already there when they met.

 But then, he opened his mouth. He spoke each syllable with a growl of annoyance like how he would berate Fuuta whenever the young boy would wait for him until midnight just because he promised the teen new piano lesson that he had forgotten.

 Gokudera opened his mouth to say more, but then he jerked forward, a hand covering his mouth to save Celestina from being a barf bag. Her coral pajamas were thankfully saved, and she got to step back inside the house, her fleece slippers narrowly missing the contents of Gokudera’s stomach. He made an attempt to get up and hopefully walk out of this disgrace. But then, he was falling to the ground fast.

 Celestina had no idea how to deal with drunk men knocking at her door at ten in the evening. It could had helped if she asked her classmates back then how they dealt with such situation instead of zoning them out so she could focus on her readings.

 She removed her fleece slippers and walked towards Gokudera’s body barefoot. She tried to carry him but then again, she couldn’t really carry a bucket of water without wobbling so, she tried to flip him so he wouldn’t be facing the floor. She held on his shoulders and pulled him out of the disaster area, leaning him against the couch, making sure that the fabric touches the area of his clothes that are not stained with his vomit.

 (She doesn’t know how to clean couches.)

 Her priority was to clean the floor of his vomit. So she took a bucket of water, a brush, and dishwashing liquid to clean the tiles. Once done, she placed her equipment at the storage area and closed the front door. She rummaged for the loosest clothes in her cabinet that may pass as ‘manly’ enough for him. She peeled off his stained shirt and changed his shirt for him.

 There were times that he would get what she was trying to order him to do, barely conscious. He was oddly obedient, and she was glad he hadn’t hurled a dynamite at her. She took a damp cloth to wash his face, and wipe the parts of his pants that were stained.

 “Hayato, just lie on the sofa.” Celestina made a move to lift his legs. After some cursing (Gokudera mutters in his sleep), and some tangled limbs here and there, he was finally snoring soundly on the sofa.

 Celestina covered his body with a blanket to protect him from the cold night. She collapsed on the floor, heaving a sigh of relief and exhaustion. She poked his cheek. “You scared me there.”

 The yellow lights softened his features. His untamable strands lined his face, and she wondered how tired he must have felt for him not to be disturbed by its tingling sensation. His brows were still furrowed but his breathing was even and relaxed.

 A smile grazed her lips. At least, he’s not the type to be noisy or do some unusually out of character things while drunk.

 And she doesn’t know how to really deal with drunk persons and the proper way to take care of them. She stayed rooted in her place, head leaning against the coffee table as she browsed through her social media. She glanced every now and then when she heard movements coming from Hayato.

 She placed her phone beside her, and yawned soundlessly. She leaned back against the sofa, head bobbing as sleep took her.

 Hayato woke up with a headache, his face a little bit red thanks to the heat and his hair slightly slick with sweat. The taste of vodka still lingers in his mouth and he wanted to down a glass of water. He slowly opened his eyes, cursing at the dimmed lights that welcomed him from the clutches of slumber. The velvet cushion under him made his bare arms itch, and he wondered since when did he have such an irritating sofa in his living room.

 But then again, his unit doesn’t have that owl wall clock with big bubbly eyes that could scare the hell out of Lambo. He turned to his side and saw Celestina resting on the cold coffee table. It is not a good position and she would definitely wake up feeling sore. A few inches away from her is a medicine box, a pitcher of water, and two glasses.

 He couldn’t remember what happened, but he somehow got in here in one piece and alive. Fragments of the traffic light, the distinct sound of the annoying honk of the truck he cut in the highway, the seemingly far door, and the smell of his vomit-

 He abruptly got up and cursed. The fact that his shirt is different from the one he was wearing last night is enough proof that he never failed to have embarrassed himself in front of the people dear to him effortlessly. He didn’t really know what to do of the situation he woke up to but all he could think of is how she is such a kind hearted average girl who got tangled in the webs of the mafia and she couldn’t do anything to stay away from it.

 She should have just left him outside her house after he willfully pushed her away the past few days. She shouldn’t have opened herself to him, letting herself cross the line between client and friends. She shouldn’t have found his company endearing that she would accept him openly after he intentionally ditched him to some person he knew she is uncomfortable with. She shouldn’t smile at him brightly after weeks of not seeing each other. She should have tendered her resignation the first time the mafia made her already messy job a lot messier. 

 He should have pushed her away before she fell deeper.

 He moved from the sofa to the coffee table. He gently placed a hand over her head, while he placed an arm under her knees. It made him wonder if she could smell the alcohol, cigarette, and sweat (and the many, many lives he took) despite her slumber, but he threw those thoughts aside to heave her up.

 “Hayato.” Her hands flailed when she thought she was floating in the air, feeling no solid ground (cold coffee table) against her body.

 Gokudera was startled that he almost dropped her. Almost. Before he could have made another injury, he twisted both of them mid-fall so Celestina would land on top of him, hopefully cushioning her fall. His back met with the rough carpet of her living room floor. Celestina’s side landed on Gokudera’s chest earning a wheeze as his response.

 “I am not fat!” Celestina moved to Gokudera’s side, sitting up to stretch her cramping leg. “Stop overreacting with how heavy I am.”

 Oh, the wheeze. Gokudera wanted to be angry at her, really.

 In a way, Yamamoto is right.

 Celestina Milano’s presence in their life is very refreshing.

 Yet, it still angered him. He yearned for her company. He looked forward to the days she would be in the Vongola premises, spending the hours shuffling through reports and checking for any irregularities in the contracts.

 (A six-year old Hayato waited inside the music room for the kind lady to teach him more advanced lessons in piano.)

 He would ask for some files she had kept in her hard drive. They would print the papers again, before she would place her seal to make the document more official. She would comment that she had already accomplished those, and he would reprimand her that she might be mistaken. His drawers held the original papers, to be introduced to the shredder the next day.

 (A six-year old Hayato would intentionally make mistakes, playing a key of G instead of an F. The kind lady would smile at his frown, and she would show him how it should be done. He would ask her to play it again so he could get it right. He treasured the extra minutes he get to spend with the kind lady.)

 His hand moved to her neck. He bit his lip to keep his heart inside his chest, never to spill what he wants to tell her.

 She remained in place, only watching the hand until it cupped her neck. He tightened his hold a little, just enough for his palm to fit but he did not give any pressure. He wondered if she would squint when she turned to him, like how she would look at the low ranking Varia members who claimed not to have killed the security guard of the bank.

 He was tempted to tighten his hold on her neck just to see if she would have the same look ‘Madame’ would give him years then. He could still remember how his warm heart (back when he could still call it a heart) would clench until it made him have a hard time breathing, when his father’s wife would evenly study his features neutrally until a grimace would pass her face.

 He understood why his father never bothered to make him feel he belonged to a place. He never pushed himself to be part of any family. Reborn found him essential in Tsuna’s family because of his gift.

 Nothing is free in this world. He could still remember the last words recorded in the voice message before it reached the time limit. It was foolish of her to easily tell those words to someone like him. She was lucky he wouldn’t dare take advantage of her naivety.

 For all her ferociousness, she is still a child learning the ways of the world.

 (Isn’t he the same? Pretending that he knows how the world works?)

 He knows how the world from above and the world from below operates. He can’t seem to trust both worlds, the few people he found and considered as finally after a long time is a testament of how he sees the world.

 She understands how the world works without getting the first-hand experience. He couldn’t really fathom how she could only nod as she controls her anger when the bitter reality shows itself to her.

 She understood how fickle humans are after learning how to stay sane in her profession.

 He slightly pulled away his hand, his fingers still lingered on her bare skin. He traced her collarbones until he came across a protruding skin slightly fairer than the rest of her neck. She saw her swallow, her chest heaving. She held her breath.

 He traced the keloid she refused to remove from her skin just like how she still insists on having him around. He couldn’t understand how she could trust him, not showing a shred of fear in her features when he literally has her life in his hands. She wasn’t even trying to break free or at least hold his hand.

 For someone who claims not being patient, she silently waits for him to speak or make a move.

 He leaned closer to her, meeting her green eyes. “You are such a puzzle sometimes. But then, you are so ignorant of the things around you, even of what you could handle.”

 He couldn’t understand the reasons she has for allowing him this deep in her life, more than an acquaintance. She had driven away more decent persons than him from her life. He couldn’t understand why she was willing to sacrifice herself for him when he was not extending the same grand gestures.

 She seems to understand, at some point, why he would be distrustful of new people. He knew that taking the bullet for him was not just some act just to get him to trust her. She isn’t one for those mind games.

 Gokudera knew that he still couldn’t trust her, even when he wanted to, because they are both living in an ever changing world with a not so clear line of alliances and enemies. Although she knows how to keep secrets, letting her in means that she would know more and he couldn’t trust her to stay the same after witnessing the most dreadful side of the mafia.

 He couldn’t allow what happened in that warehouse to repeat. She might receive worse injuries in the future simply because she would rather choose him than her safety.

 “Name the price of your so called love. A bastard alone isn’t worth it for a lawyer but a bastard who is a right-hand man of the Vongola is worth a lot, isn’t it?”

 It passed slowly. The gleam stayed in her eyes like a drop of water struggling to break free from its vessel. She looked away from him, moving her body away from his reach. She still couldn’t feel her legs but the desire to move away from him was stronger.

 Gokudera somehow couldn’t shake of the feeling that his cruelty was the least she had expected from him from what she had shown him.

 Then she willed herself to meet his eyes. She cupped his cheeks, her eyes flooded with her tears. Her body trembled. She remained silent with the occasional sobs escaping.

 She bit her lip and her tears finally stopped.

 “I see.” Slowly, she got up supporting herself against the coffee table to avoid falling. “You are free to stay the night, Hayato.” She faced the direction of the stairs, her shoulders shaking as she clenched her fists. She sniffed before she gave him some final reminders, “Just feel at home. If you need anything, I’m just upstairs.” She reached the first step but she turned to him, looking at the floor and softly she said, “I’m just here for you.” She didn’t wait for his response, she couldn’t stay a minute longer in his presence.

 Gokudera almost stopped her from retreating to her room. Almost. Instead, he wiped the liquid tricking down his cheek, the heavy feeling in his chest becoming unbearable.

 As always he could only blame himself, because-

 -he couldn’t trust himself to get in her life and cause so much damage in the little bubble she had created to protect herself.

 When Celestina returned to the living room around noon the next day, the blanket on the sofa was folded neatly, the glasses already dried and placed in the cupboard. He may have taken the painkillers she left for there are no traces of them in the room, just like how there were no traces of him staying the night.

 She filled a glass with water, watching the steady flow from the faucet. Her hand was trembling so she gripped the wrist with her free hand, not minding that the water was already overflowing from the glass making her hand wet.

 “It’s all right.” She closed the faucet, the glass shaking in her trembling hands.

 “I’m fine.” She gripped her wrist tightly to steady the glass.

 The water was still overflowing and she could only curse inwardly. Her grip did not help her stop the trembling of her hand.

 “I’m fine.” It came out harshly, more forceful than intended and yet her body was shaking that she gave up on keeping the glass steady and instead allowed it to fall on the sink. The water spilled until only some drops were left. The impact was hard on the glass that it broke unevenly.

 Celestina fell on her knees, gripping the edge of the sink tighter. Her knuckles turned white as her chest tightened giving her a hard time breathing.

 “You’ll be fine.” She repeated, voice cracking.

 “You’ll be fine. It happens.” For the first time since her forced leave, she was glad that they strictly forbade her from reporting to work.

 “You’ll be all right. You’ll understand it. You’ll be all right.”

Chapter Text

Gokudera brought a date with him during the celebration of the Ninth’s birthday. They have been dating for two weeks.  

The old man was happy with his retirement, and happier to hear that Sawada was doing well with the family’s matters. Xanxus attended the party with some of the members of the Varia.  

Sawada had introduced Celestina to his predecessor when Gokudera arrived. The three of them shared a conversation regarding the latest affairs of the Vongola cover businesses. Sawada found that Celestina, being a good natured person, was well received by the Ninth. The conversation moved to Celestina’s personal life. The Ninth asked about her family after all, and she animatedly told to the two iconic Vongola heads of her niece and nephews.  

The silver haired Mafioso made his presence known to his boss, and introduced the red haired woman he brought with him.  

Celestina’s fists clenched as she tried to remain calm at the sight. The introductions were long and hard for her to bear. When the time came that Gokudera introduced her to his date (she never bothered learning their names for all the persons present, including Gokudera himself, knew that this relationship would not last. Next week, he would introduce a new woman), she gave smile at their general direction.  

For the others, her smile was simply a quirking upwards of her lips. No one commented on her strangely cold welcoming.  

The two men who were oblivious about what happened between her and Gokudera dismissed it as something about work.  

The Ninth started a small talk with Gokudera, occasionally including the woman in the conversation. The topic never reached the crucial part of their work.

Celestina politely excused herself from the group when she couldn’t bear the sight of the pair before her. She could only wish to be the girl that Gokudera would bother introducing to his boss, however brief that period would be. She longed to be the woman who could freely embrace him and he would return the gesture without regard of modesty.  

As she walked away, willing herself not to look back, she never noticed a pair of green eyes watching her with concern.  

She stayed for another two hours. Lambo seemed to have an idea that she could be his escape route for peace and order whenever some of the adults would lecture him about manners and propriety, or when he is escaping some responsibility. The young Bovino left when someone was already done with his task.  

Before she could allow herself to brood, Bianchi approached her from the dark corner Celestina had declared as her spot. No one was really interested with some mundane girl like her. She’s not really part of this world.  

It is the same anywhere. She tried hard to be included in circles where she knew she belongs but it always felt like they would forget her after a few minutes. She’s never assertive when it comes to things outside her work. Thus, she became content watching people from afar in her little corner.  

“Celestina, I’m glad you are recovering well.” Bianchi handed a glass of dry wine to her.  

Celestina was tempted not to accept it, just to spite Gokudera but she decided otherwise. She gratefully accepted her tenth glass of the night, feeling a little bit tipsy already. “It’s all thanks to the Vongola and to you Ms. Bianchi.” She allowed the small talk to continue.  

Three waiters passed by them, Bianchi grabbing drinks for the two of them. Celestina finished the glasses more slowly than Bianchi who seemed to have high alcohol tolerance like her brother. The lawyer suspected that the last two drinks offered to her by the older woman were not dry wines but something stronger.

Her brother. The thought left a bitter taste in her mouth.  

Celestina was glad that she still had control over herself despite the many drinks she had already taken in her system. From the other side of the room, she was fascinated that Xanxus was still not drunk despite having his third bottle of whiskey.  

She knew where Gokudera was, and she was scared to look at his direction.  

“Are you angry that Hayato never visited you when you were sick?” Bianchi already finished her drink when she spoke. Her eyes were searching for the nearest server, hoping that he would pass by them.  

“I imagine he has a lot of work. That’s all right, actually. I understand.” Celestina answered, her hold on her glass tightened. That is all that she could do in reality. Understand. It has been her way of facing rejection for the past years. She understood her relatives in constantly comparing her to her siblings. She understood her mother who would always choose a bad time in opening up to her about the problems her mother has been facing. She understood that some things just won’t go her way even after trying her best.  

She understood why people will not choose over another. She tries to understand, at the moment, why Gokudera will not like her the way she wants him to. She could never get angry at him despite the fact that she took care of him in his worst drunk moment of his life only to mock her feelings. For the past hours, what-ifs has been popping out her mind but it didn’t help her enjoy this party at all.  

She would eventually go into terms with the things that bothers her.  

But that doesn’t mean it does not hurt her.  

Part of her knew that she was too hasty. But she would be contented if he rejected her rather than-

She finished the drink, instead.  

Bianchi noticed that her brother would take pains when it comes to this girl.  She could see that he likes her more than as a friend. She just doesn’t understand why he would not act upon those sincere feelings and leave another girl broken instead.  

And it seems, he has somehow found a way to hurt Celestina as well.  

“Why did you ask, Ms. Bianchi?” Celestina’s voice wavered for a moment.  

“It’s just that the two of you usually hang around each other when he doesn’t have to be around Tsuna.” Bianchi took two glasses of some colorful cocktail from the server. “Did something happen between you two?”

Celestina stared at the liquid in her glass instead of Bianchi. She swallowed the lump in her throat before she emptied the contents of her glass. The world around her seemed to spin but she never tried to do anything to make it stop. She only closed her eyes and wondered what kind of drink Bianchi was making her finish. When she opened her eyes, she came face to face with a green colored liquid with some kind of fruit on the glass. The smell of alcohol was strong on this one. “Nothing much really. We haven’t talked recently due to work.”  

It was partly true.  

Bianchi chuckled. “I see. You two seems to be an odd pair.”

Celestina blushed at that before the crushing pain took over. “No, no, it’s not like that. We just work together a lot.”  

“Always drowned with work every time some sort of problem comes up.” Bianchi shook her head and pushed the drink to Celestina. “Just drink up for tonight and forget your work.”

“Perhaps, but this would be the last one.” Celestina’s hand reached for the drink but she was stopped when a warmer hand, one she has been familiar with, took a hold of wrist. She turned to the newcomer who was scowling. “Is there something wrong, Hayato?” She asked, ignoring the glare Gokudera was sending his sister. Since she got no answer, her free hand tried to reach for the drink but she heard him made a sound of disapproval.  

“You have reached your limit. You can say ‘no’ when you want to.” Gokudera scolded her, letting go of her hand and making sure she wouldn’t get any drinks Bianchi offered. “What are you thinking? You get drunk in wines alone, and yet you took in stronger liquor.” He pulled her towards the exit, giving Bianchi another glare before he opened the door.

No one but Bianchi saw his departure. Surely some members of the Vongola family would notice later.  

The two of them were passing by empty hallways leading to the exit. Celestina could only stare at the marble tiles of the floor to alleviate her spinning vision. She had gone overboard indeed. “Hayato, where are we going?” She asked, pulling away her hand from his hold.  

“Getting you home. At your state now, you wouldn’t arrive home safely.” He pointed out, presenting his hand to her. When she simply stared at him, he added, “Keys. I’ll drive for you. We arrived here using one of the Vongola’s services.”

She took a deep breath before shaking her head. She placed her hands on her chest where her heart was. “That’s all right, I can drive myself home.” She gave him a small smile. “I am not that drunk yet. You can go back inside where everyone is. I was planning to leave after that drink, anyway.” She walked ahead of Gokudera hoping that she was walking straight.  

When she was two steps ahead of him, he easily caught up and held her hand to stop her. Celestina stared at their hands. His grip was tight and she wasn’t making any motion to accept his hold. Her chest tightened at the sight. “Don’t be stubborn or you will hurt yourself.”  

Celestina peeled his hand of her using her free hand. He didn’t let go. He was much stronger than her in all aspects after all. So she chuckled at his statement before she softly responded, “I already did. If I get hurt tonight, that is nothing compared to what happened a few weeks ago. For what it’s worth, I never saw you as a bastard. You deserve to be loved beyond your parentage. I am so sorry if I made you feel like your worth is only that of a right-hand man.” She took his momentary shock to pull her hand away from his hold. “It’s rude to leave your date inside. See you next week, Hayato.” The tears couldn’t be hidden anymore but she covered her mouth from making any noise.  

Gokudera could only watch her as she walked away. She has the decency not to make excuses when she was forced to interact with him. She still has in her heart to be honest with him, indulging in his selfish desire to feel accepted, and yet he had not reciprocated the courtesy she has been giving him.  

When Celestina was inside her car, she leaned against the steering wheel as her body trembled. Her stubbornness led to her pain and she has no one to blame but herself. She immediately tried to compose herself or somebody will see her in that state. Thus, she started the engine and wiped her tears.  

After she parked her car, she grabbed her things and ran towards the comfort of her home. She closed the door, and collapsed on the ground as she lamented on why she almost forgot fearing falling for a person.  

Her father did not really show to her how to properly love her mother. Perhaps, she should have known not to expect a lot.  

O~O~O

It was a week later that her friend waited for her outside the building of the firm. There was a gloomy look on his face, with the busy week every working person seemed to be experiencing. She placed her phone inside her pocket, and jogged towards the blond brooding in the corner. The sound of her heels clicking on the pavement did not get his attention.

“Antonov!” She called, patting his shoulder for good measure. She frowned upon catching sight of his red rimmed eyes. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

Antonov shook his head, his blond locks following his movement. “Harry has been cheating on me for five years.”  

Celestina felt anger bubbling up within her core. “All right, let’s grab the driest scotch we can find, your favorite cake, and we go to my place and talk about it, all right?”

A faint smile of approval crossed his features.  

Their dinner was a tub of their favorite gelato from a gelaterie and a bottle of the driest scotch from Antonov’s favorite brewery. Celestina stopped drinking on the fourth glass, feeling very elated and inexplicably happy, no doubt the alcohol in her system making her feel that way.  

Antonov was already at his more than tenth glass, currently spouting some violent words and curses at anything that reminds him of his ex-boyfriend. One of her spatulas, in particular was a victim of Antonov’s unusually violent tendencies, but she understood that he was just angry.  

He calmed for a bit, after throwing her vase that looked like the one Antonov gave his boyfriend’s mother after being introduced as a workmate on their second anniversary. She did not hold a grudge at her friend venting his anger at the poor vase Reborn gave her as a welcome gift. It kind of reminded her of the hitman’s high standards and how she could never be enough for the Vongola, and for Gokudera.

Celestina took a deep breath and tried to enjoy her tub of sweet dessert. Antonov drank almost half of the contents of the bottle, and he was now blaming himself at the failed relationship. He was wailing loud that she has to wonder if he had come from the line of banshees, the blood now diluted and incorporated to the human genome.  

She immediately shook that thought away for it was something Gokudera had shared to her.  

“I have been forgiving him for cheating on me. I thought he would stop after the fifth time.” Antonov hiccupped, not bothering to wipe his tears nor blow his nose. “He did again, even when I would do my best on making him forget his name in the-”

Celestina wondered how the conversation went to his sex life. When Antonov became more detailed with the story, she poured the drink generously in her glass and drank the contents in huge gulps. The topic continued and Celestina has to drink the scotch to get through this night.  

“I think there’s something I am not able to give him. Harry keeps on looking for it in another. If only he’d tell me then I could provide for him.” Antonov hoarded the bottle for himself after Celestina made a trip to the bathroom to rid the contents of her stomach.  

Celestina was lying on the couch, the bitter taste of her vomit still lingering in her mouth. His statement brought a lot of questions in her head she dared not entertain at this time. This may be the first time she got drunk. “It is easier to say that you are more than enough for some ass like him. But you have been coming to me every time you caught him. I’m actually surprised you broke up with him this time.”

Antonov swirled the contents of the bottle. “I can’t take it anymore.” He looked at Celestina who was simply staring at the ceiling. He felt it the moment he saw her, the sadness that was unusually weighing her down. “And you? Did you see your father with another woman again?”  

Celestina negatively answered, quite relieved that her sadness wasn’t caused by her father’s infidelity. “I’m just thinking.” At least then, she won’t see her mother cry.  

He drank the remaining contents of the bottle. He knew that Celestina need not be drunk so she could tell him what she was thinking. Once she gets comfortable to a person, she would tell them anything when she feels comfortable with it.  

“Sometimes, I think that they never chose me because I lack a lot of things or just have the misfortune of not knowing what it’s like in their world. Perhaps, trying to look strong does not look good on them.”

Them being the almost in her life. Antonov never wanted her to change just to be loved, and she does too because she keeps on returning to the fortress she built for herself to convince herself that she’s safer there than anywhere. “Sometimes, I hate the usual routine of me working but I know it is my fault too. I rarely let those whom I knew is interested in my life.”

“Yeah, you ditch them on your first date.” Antonov got up to look for another hard drink she has in her cute bar. He took a bottle of the finest scotch he would be enjoying tonight (and so far, this one is the finest he would drink- just how much is she earning?) and returned to her side.  

“But when I want them to, they push me away.” Celestina laughed at her misery despite the tears in her eyes. “The beauty I have is not enough to make them want me, it seems.”

Antonov regretted freely giving her drinks. She’s crying and he never knew what to do when she’s the one who is crying because of life and not because of something related to work (their studies before).  

“It’s funny how I can be this hurt when there wasn’t even a thing. Perhaps it is me who is the problem.”  

“No you’re not! Just like Harry, they are an ass.”

“He is not an ass really. Smart aleck, aggressive, temperamental- yes. But he’s just afraid to show compassion.”

“Tina, you have to forgive yourself for things out of your control.”

Celestina can’t. The first time she loathed herself because of where her courage took her, her father blamed her for causing the fight between her parents. She had told her mother that she caught her father undressing the new intern of the corporation. Her father blamed her for days until her mother finally forgave him and promised not to do it again. He still blames her for the fragile trust of her mother. At times, she is convinced that it is her fault.  Whenever she would call out her father’s infidelity, warning him of his promise, he would rub it in her face- that she brought chaos in the household. Her siblings could feel the tense air but her parents wouldn’t let them know.  

Amongst other things, she couldn’t let it go. At some point, she had a hand in it.  

“How come you still took a leap of faith despite knowing this inevitable outcome, Anton?”

“The leap of faith was worth it than wondering what it would be like, Celestina.”  

Celestina wondered how humans have survived this long if that is the mindset of the majority of the species.  

O~O~O

It wasn’t her normal work day in the Vongola but there was an urgent deal to be sealed that Gokudera had to meet her at the porch. He told her to wait for his call for they have to talk with the important guest, so she sat idly in library, playing with the blocks she suspected that Lambo left in the table after he got bored playing.

She tried acting normal after the incident a few weeks back. She deleted her messages to him that is not regarding work and completely went through the start of another week as though the last week never happened.  

She thrived that way. If she could just forget whatever feelings she possessed, just like how she had pushed away some of her so-called families, then she can move forward.  

Her cheeks heat up whenever he would talk to her. She knew that this was of shame and she was too embarrassed to admit it even to herself. At least he was kind enough to keep the status quo.  

The world has a funny way of making her not interesting life so interesting. This was the second time she laid her heart bare, even going beyond the ethical standards of her profession. And yet, her heart was crushed into pieces. She had missed the most obvious signs of a losing case, yet again. The only consolation she got is that it was not a case she was paid to gracefully perform her best.  

(The first time was when she was a college student. She never planned on acting on it but her friends’ concern about her well being made them tell the person of her feelings she held. He rejected her the most painless way possible- by conveying it to her friends. Celestina wondered then how could she feel so much anger and sadness at the same time. She wondered how it was possible to break something that she did not even start. But she moved on. She learned her lesson not to tell her friends what she feels and instead let the universe do its own freaking thing.)  

Celestina touched her neck, and she felt all the air in her lungs left her. Her chest felt tight. She cried that night when he left. She felt ridiculous for crying over someone who never entered her heart. It was the second time. She had prepared a room dedicated for them, and yet she never stood a chance.  

(Her first real heartbreak was because the guy chose a girl far more expressive and outgoing than her.)  

She laid on her bed for hours, muffling her sobs and cries.  

This was more painful than before, though. Gokudera doesn’t want to enter her heart. She should have seen that when he stood her up.  

(And yet, she still made sure that his small comforts are attended to whenever she is in the mansion.)

At least she is improving, Celestina convinced herself. As of late, the nights are spent without the tears. She simply counted the lines on her ceiling, and if sleep doesn’t claim her, she would work all the while feeling a heavy load inside her chest, chilling her body.  

The library, she concluded, is unusually stuffy. Celestina got up and went to the open doors of the balcony. She did not realize that someone was first to occupy the balcony until it was too late.  

“Forgive me, I was unaware that someone would use this space.” A taller woman sat beside the open doors. Her fair skin was tickled by the afternoon breeze. Her crisp dark red suit made her seem taller, as if she was looking down at every being from her pedestal. Her eyes, though having wrinkles at its corners, could still silence the most preposterous.  

Celestina could hear her grandmother’s voice, elegant and stern in the voice of the woman. This is the first time she saw the woman in the mansion. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. I did not notice.” She hasn’t been herself lately for her to notice a lot of things.  

The woman regarded her, like how her grandmother would look at them when contemplating how to deal with their mistake of picking the wrong spoon in formal dinners. “Oh, the lawyer is here for the deal I presume.” Celestina’s confusion must have been apparent, for the woman continued. “I saw you at one of the balls my family hosted- the Sorrentino. You were there last New Year.”  

Celestina regained her composure, offering her hand out. “Forgive my rudeness, madam. I am-”

The woman raised her hand to silence Celestina. “Celestina Milano, the civilian lawyer Vongola Decimo seems to have high respects.” She smirked at the dumbfounded girl in front of her. “I am Ilaria. I have heard that you also help some men with their legal problems.”  

Celestina gaped at the woman. She would have rather endured the stuffy air inside the library than have an impromptu talk with someone who looks so important for the Vongola for her to offend. “I’m sure your able lawyers can help you with that, madam. The Vongola hired me to prevent problems from going outside the media, and to handle their business with the surface world.”

“I would hardly see that is just the capabilities of Federico’s prodigy.” Ilaria raised a brow. She remembered the lawyer at the party as the escort of the right hand man, Gokudera.  

Decimo has informed her of the girl when Ilaria was caught staring. She noted how unusually unguarded Gokudera was with his date that night. He would openly allow her to make grand gestures when they thought no one was looking. Celestina’s eyes were only fixed on the bomber, those green orbs sparkling with joy and content with what they share. Gokudera was leaning towards her, uncharacteristically ignoring potential threats around them as he let time slip, sharing a conversation only the two of them knows. It was the first time that Ilaria saw Gokudera looked after anyone other than the Decimo.  

After the ball, Ilaria pondered on a lot of things in her life. She had successfully kept her family intact. The family she had created. It doesn’t matter if there is peace and love, as long as the famiglia lived on.

“I am not here to test you, Celestina.” Ilaria smiled at the lawyer. She leaned against the wall, crossing her arms on her chest. “I just want someone to talk with.”  

“Then, you have to forgive me for that madame.” Celestina offered, leaning against the balcony railing. “I am not a good conversationalist, but I am a good listener.”

Ilaria, just like that night after the ball, remembered the bundle his husband brought home a few years back. He claimed it to be their son, and Ilaria had to accept motherhood the second time. She remembered the young man she fancied years ago that she had given to him her world. When she married him, she cried tears of joy at the exchange of their vows. He was calm during the ceremony- he spoke his vows perfectly and eloquently, he slipped the ring on her finger languidly, and he entertained the guests of their wedding hospitably.  

“How about indulging me with answers?” Ilaria offered, looking at the lawyer straight in the eye.  

“I will try my best.” Celestina stared back, patiently waiting for the questions to be thrown.  

Ilaria gave the girl small smile. “Did you ever wonder if, perhaps, you were just not enough?”  

Celestina clenched her fists. The universe has its way of mocking her. She opened her mouth to speak but decided otherwise.  

Ilaria could only smile wistfully at Celestina’s forlorn expression. It has been the greeting she gave herself in front of the vanity for the past twenty years since she had been married. Ilaria remembered the chill that started from her chest slowly spreading throughout her body at the sight of her husband, waiting at the front door for the arrival of the pianist. She remembered the accusing eyes, squinting to make out the reality of the situation through his drunken haze, staring back at her after the incident that led to the pianist’s demise, silently asking her, ‘why can’t it be you?’  

“It doesn’t matter.” Celestina answered, her hand clenching into fists on her lap. Her pencil skirt wrinkled at the pressure she exerted but she welcomed the distraction of the blemished fabric to keep her tears at bay. “It doesn’t matter whether you think you are not enough, madam.” She repeated, keeping her voice low and steady hoping that she conveyed the message with certainty and authority.  

“Why is that?” Ilaria’s eyes narrowed at the girl.  

“Because as long as they’re all right, it doesn’t matter if you are enough for them. What matters is that I made sure that their comforts are met, no matter how inadequate you think they would reciprocate.” Celestina looked up to the woman, quirking her lips a little bit upward. “No one says it should be mutual.”  

Ilaria’s mouth hung agape. She was reminded of the maid she had sentenced to death after discovering that the maid was a spy sent by a small mob. When Ilaria had told her men to shot her with a bullet, the maid simply regarded her with a serene smile before she closed her eyes.  

She understood then that Celestina had accepted her faults, even finding rejection inevitable thanks to things she lacked. “It doesn’t need to be mutual.” The girl repeated with finality.

Celestina’s line of sight strayed from Ilaria to Bianchi. Realization struck the lawyer when the two women stood side by side each other. Bianchi got most of her mother’s features, it seemed.  

“Ah, Celestina.” Bianchi gave a warm smile as a greeting. “This is my mother.” She introduced the woman who kept staring at Celestina with an unreadable expression. “Hayato is on his way to fetch you. Father and Tsuna are done with the negotiations.”

Celestina nodded before she headed back inside to prepare her things. When she was certain that she has all the things she needed, she reached for the scar running from her collarbone to her shoulder. Her hand dropped to her side when the doors opened.  

Bianchi wondered what had transpired but she was certain she heard her mother mumble, ‘naïve girl.’  

O~O~O

Gokudera saw how Ilaria wistfully stared at his husband’s figure at the center of the crowd. They were in the function hall of a luxurious hotel where an annual business meeting is held. All the stockholders are present to discuss the important matters for their business.  

Legitimate businesses are as important as their underground dealings.  

Both of them didn’t care for the crowd the Sorrentino head was gathering. However, both noticed the subtle touches he would give to the young pianist that the manager of the entertainment introduced. The pianist is nothing like Ilaria or Lavina, but she is a pianist nonetheless.  

Ilaria drifted the topic to Gokudera instead. “Be glad you took after your mother mostly.” A group of young women passed by after being instructed by their fathers to show up in the meeting to greet the important people. They greeted Gokudera primly, blushing when he acknowledged them. “You are a lady magnet- a trait you share with your father.”

Anger flashed in Gokudera’s eyes, clouding the green orbs like how a storm would cover the sky. “I am not like that man.” Ilaria raised a brow at him. He looked away, clenching his fists. “I am not like father.”

Ilaria smirked. “No. You are not.” She sighed when she returned her gaze to her husband who shamelessly draped an arm on the younger pianist. “You may have been involved with a lot of women but it is beneath you to cheat on them.”

Gokudera gaped at the older woman’s words. Ilaria cupped his cheeks, her smooth hands caressing his skin. Her small smile gave a sparkle in her eyes.  

Then, Gokudera looked away, his silver bangs covering his eyes.  

Ilaria placed her hand beside her, sighing as she walked away.  

She should have shown him that compassion when he needed it the most.  

Chapter Text

Lambo escaped personally reporting to the Decimo after his failed mission. He rushed a written report and left it on Sawada’s desk with a post-it note telling him that he would return when Sawada’s anger already faded.

For the meantime, he went to town and paid Celestina a visit in her office in the law firm. He introduced himself as the cousin of Celestina, earning him a look of disgust. Lambo waited patiently in the couches, pretending to read one of the reader’s digest magazines on the coffee table.

Celestina’s doors are closed. She was occupied with a client, no doubt. When she was finished, the secretary informed her of the ‘cousin’ who was waiting for her.

Lambo frowned when Celestina went out of her office to check. She looked cautiously at the faces in the reception, brows knitting in worry. The secretary pointed at Lambo.

Celestina’s face brightened at the sight of unruly black locks and cow printed shirt. “Lambo!”

Lambo jumped from his seat and walked hurriedly towards the threshold of her office. “Celestina! It has been so long.” He pushed her inside the office, hands on her shoulders. “You should take care of your body more. It’s past lunch already and yet you have not eaten yet.”

“I am not your source of free lunch, you know.” Celestina playfully jabbed, glancing at the clock in the corner. “Why are you escaping-”

“Before you finish that sentence, I am not escaping from Mr. Gokudera!” Lambo noticed Celestina turned rigid upon hearing the name of the Storm Guardian but he did not pursue the subject. “I am running away from Tsuna!”

Celestina stopped at the edge of her desk, frowning at Lambo’s grave predicament. “Isn’t that worse?” She took her purse and a box of papers, handing it to Lambo. “Help me file these pleadings in the court first. I’ll reward you with free lunch after.” Celestina opened her planner to review her schedule for the day. “Wait here.” She instructed Lambo, gesturing at the chair near her desk as she headed to the secretary’s table.

Lambo took a seat and placed the box on his lap. He wondered why a stack of papers is heavier than a baby. He stretched his limbs to remove the pressure burdening his joints. He didn’t expect that the chair would move with his body until he slipped from the furniture. The box remained closed, fortunately but along the fall, he took the trash can filled with papers sitting peacefully beside Celestina’s desk.

The commotion was not loud enough to get Celestina’s attention. She became his escape from the Vongola so he picked all the papers and a very neat leather sketchbook. He wondered if the sketchbook was thrown accidentally (like Enma’s letter to Tsuna that he unknowingly kicked in the trash that caused a lot of casualties and unnecessary damages) when he toppled over. He scanned the pages of the sketchbook but found it to be empty. 

The back of the cover page, however, contained Gokudera’s handwriting. Lambo took a second glance at the first page to confirm. It is uncharacteristic of his sort-of-brother to give something personally significant to a person as a gift. He would usually resort to bouquets to give his dates.

‘Even Van Gogh rests his love for art but never left it. Just because your work is not similar to painting doesn’t mean you should give up on it.’

Lambo placed the watercolor pad on the desk, mind refusing to dwell that Gokudera wrote those sentimental words.

Celestina found him picking crumpled and torn papers in her office when she returned.

“It’s not what you think!” Lambo guiltily explained to her, hands wildly gesturing around her office. Words left him in panic.

O~O~O

Lambo did not realize that he entered a suspicious building when sunset arrived. Celestina told him that they have a final paper to deliver and she made him carry another heavy box, filled with paper no doubt, as they walked ten blocks from the law firm.

He was sweating, and panting hard when they arrived at the building. He gladly entered the air conditioned premises when they arrived and plopped himself in the couch of the reception area, catching his breath.

Celestina sat beside him, catching her breath as well. However, she was not as tired as Lambo.

“Hey.” He sat straight, eyes narrowing at Celestina who turned to him innocently. “Did Mr. Gokudera call you?”

Celestina fidgeted yet again when the younger man mentioned Gokudera’s name.

“He did, didn’t he?” He inched closer, certain that her uneasiness was caused by some conspiracy they crafted when she reported his whereabouts. “I told you that it is Tsuna who got angry at me and not Mr. Gokudera!” He exasperated. “Did they tell you that I hate walking? Is this some Spartan training they made you supervise as my punishment?”

The frown in Celestina’s face told him otherwise. “Lambo, I just need to deliver things around town for today.” She patted his shoulder. “If you hadn’t come to my office, I would have a hard time carrying my files.”

Lambo looked away, scratching his cheek as he gave a small smile. “Of course. There is no task difficult for the great Lambo!”

Celestina got up, hands on her hips when she turned to Lambo. “Now that you have rested, let’s deliver the final papers. Shall we, oh great Lambo?”

She didn’t need to bribe him with food after feeding his ego. Lambo immediately followed her towards the elevator and to the top floor. He couldn’t help but feel nostalgia surrounding him as soon as they entered the floor.

The secretary seemed oddly familiar but Lambo brushed it off as his exhaustion taking a toll in him. The heat for the day seemed to have gotten in his head. When they were granted passage, Lambo was the first to enter the room. Celestina closed the door behind her with an apologetic smile.

“Oi, Lambo! Why did you cause trouble to Celestina again?” Gokudera’s annoyed voice welcomed him.

Goosebumps crawled all over Lambo’s body as he slowly turned to the person behind the desk. “Mr. Gokudera, I just wanted to visit Celestina, that’s all. It’s been two months since we’ve bonded.”

When Gokudera took a step forward, Lambo dropped the box. Celestina’s reflex when things tend to fall in front of her is to try to catch it. However, the box was too heavy for her hand that the sharp side scraped one of her fingers as the box fell on the floor with a loud thud. She let out a sound of pain but immediately muffled her mouth with her free hand when she realized their attention turned to her. She shook her hand, hoping to shake away the pain.

Lambo watched as Gokudera passed by to inspect Celestina’s not so life-threatening wound in her hand. The area affected was only turning red, and at most it would have been a shallow wound. He flinched when Gokudera glared at him and shouted, “You idiot!”

To Lambo’s surprise, Celestina pulled her hand back and looked away from them. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it, Hayato.” She avoided the silver head’s gaze. Even when Gokudera insisted on looking at her hand, she turned her body away from him.

Lambo gaped at the scene before him. What surprised him more is when Gokudera looked away, hands clenching at his sides. Anger momentarily crossed Lambo’s expression, at the pain his sort-of-brother was trying to hide.

“Well, I just came here to drop off Lambo.” Celestina walked closer to Lambo and patted his head. Lambo swatted her hand away. Her eyes widened as she instinctively took a step back.

“Don’t be so rude, you idiot cow!” Gokudera chided.

She glanced at the hand Lambo pushed away before turning to the floor helplessly. Facing the inevitable, she turned to Gokudera. “Lambo is a clever man. If you want to teach him anything, it would be better by teaching him like how you wanted to be taught when you were in his stage.”

“Wait, let me give you a ride home.” Gokudera rushed to his desk and opened the drawer where he usually places his keys.

Lambo glared at Celestina who watched Gokudera languidly take the things he needed before going out. His gaze soften when she looked down at smiled wistfully.

“That’s all right, Hayato.” She opened the door, mind set on leaving. “I still have to get back to the office to finish some of my work.”

Gokudera got his wallet and hurried to the door. He motioned for Lambo to follow him. “Then, I’ll give you a ride to your office.” Celestina almost slipped away from his grasp but he was got a hold of her arm quicker. “I’ll have to bring him back to the manor anyway, so-”

Lambo could hear the desperation in Gokudera’s voice. He may not know Celestina well but he spent a lot of time with Gokudera to know when something was bothering him.

Celestina glanced at Lambo and sighed. She did not bother hiding how heavy it was for her to be with him. “All right.” She weakly said but she retreated from Gokudera’s touch.

When they reached the car, Lambo rushed to the back seat, lying on the chair to occupy the whole area to force Celestina to seat in front. He pretended that he did not see how Celestina heaved a sigh to the heavens (at least the cemented roof of the basement) before she sat in the front seat.

Although he wanted the two adults to talk, he couldn’t exactly shrug away the cold atmosphere during the car ride. When they reached a four-way intersection, Gokudera’s hand grabbed Celestina’s. He was relieved that the skin turned back to its original color but there is a bit of scrape near her thumb.

Celestina pulled her hand away from him. “You don’t have to worry about it, Hayato. It will be fine.”

Thankfully, the lights turned green for their lane. When they reached the building of the law firm, Gokudera grabbed her wrist.

Lambo wanted to disappear right then and there. The tension was just too much for him.

“It seems that your hand is trembling still.” Gokudera observed.

Celestina opened the door and forcefully removed her wrist from his hold. “Why are you doing this?” It felt bad to be so aloof with him especially when she promised that she’s just there for him, however, she also wanted him to feel what he did to her.

“Look, I still care for you but-”

Celestina gave him a serene smile that made his chest ache. “Stop making Lambo worry about you, Hayato. You may not know it but the people you care about also want you to let them take care of you.” She clenched her fists on her lap. “I understand why you are adamant. Any person who experienced your pain would. But when you don’t want people to enter your life,” She wondered why she was telling him this yet she continued, “It is as if you are telling them that you don’t like them to be part of your world.” She turned to him with a grim expression. “Stop looking after me from now on and look after the people you really care about, Hayato. I am not worth a right-hand man’s care, Hayato.” She glared at him as she slammed close the door of his car.

Lambo felt like he wanted to cry when he heard Gokudera cursed loudly. He wished that his past self would carelessly use the ten year bazooka so he could be transported to happy times.

When Celestina got home, brushes and paints were scattered on the coffee table. The page of the watercolor pad was left open to allow the paint to dry.

O~O~O

“I told you not to join any battles in the arena of Mafia Land!” Sawada scolded Lambo who stood before his desk. “Most of the fighters they would throw to a contender are experienced and well-trained. They won’t hesitate to kill any person.”

Lambo scratched the back of his head, looking at anything inside the room except for Sawada. “I won against them. It just so happened that they did not grant me access when they discovered I can use flames.” When the owners of Mafia Land got hold of information that they were being investigated for several charges of embezzlement and human trafficking, they immediately banned all flame users from entering and allowed only non-flame users affiliated with the mafia families. They knew of the noble mafia families’ noble intention to convert most of their businesses into legitimate operations to help victims of previous bosses. They laughed at the idealistic notion of foolish children, but they feared the ideals of those foolish children who refused to be tainted by the mafia.

“Then all the more reason for you not to enter the arena!” Sawada collapsed in his chair, too tired to talking with Lambo.

Lambo sighed and went closer to Sawada’s desk. “Tsuna, I’m sorry. I know you wanted me safe as well. It’s just that.” He remembered the terrified faces of children when he infiltrated one of the underground rooms. The room was too small to accommodate their numbers, their limbs too thin, and body so weak. One of them looked like I-pin but her eyes left any hope for the world, too clouded to even believe the light could reach her. He faces of the people he grew up with flashed before him. They may not have any fighting abilities but they fought with them all these years through their own means. Kyoko and Haru would make sure that the mundane tasks will not burden further the group when they have bigger battles to face. Nana- the mother Lambo grew up having- gave their growing family the love every one yearned for without asking for anything in return. Lambo was fortunate to have met the people around him.

They allowed him to be selfish, to experience playing and living without a care in the world as how a child should be, to learn from his mistakes and to make amends. “Those children should not experience being suspicious of the people around them. They should be back to their families.”

Lambo could never forgive his boss for willingly sending him to the Vongola family when he was a mere toddler. He felt so left out as a child. The people around him were different. Until Nana made him feel like he actually belonged in that place, allowed him to be a child that the Bovino family would always take away from him.

Sawada patted Lambo’s head. “I’m glad you’re back home, Lambo.” He went around his desk to place a reassuring hand on Lambo’s shoulder, squeezing it gently. “We’ll return those children back. They won’t stay there for long.”

Sawada couldn’t really stay angry at Lambo that long. He couldn’t also bear parting with the youngest guardian if he maintained that crest-fallen expression in his face. So, he offered that they take a snack in the kitchen. Lambo could eat anything and everything that he wants.

In the threshold stood Gokudera, a cup of coffee in one of his hands while a thick manila envelope. He just arrived from a meeting with some of their clients that hired them for protection. The silver head greeted them with tired enthusiasm. 

Lambo flinched when the smile on Gokudera’s lips turned to a frown. He felt the envelope hitting his head not too lightly.  “Mr. Hayato!” He whined, rubbing the aching area with his two hands.

“Take it.” Gokudera glared at Lambo. However, the expression softened when the younger man took the envelope. “Celestina told me that you confided in her about why you ran away from Decimo the other day.” He stared at his coffee cup with a somber expression.

Lambo didn’t know what happened between Celestina and Gokudera. He always enjoyed their company before. Gokudera has always been at ease around her. The exchange he encountered the other day made it so hard to be with them.

Sawada noticed the wistfulness in his right-hand man’s expression.

“She went to my office in the University last night to give me the files you need for the mission.” Gokudera informed him. “Apparently, her senior partners are also investigating one of the owners of Mafia Land after some of the stockholders approached them.”

Lambo beamed at Gokudera. “Thank you Mr.-” He was cut off when Gokudera pinched Lambo’s cheek with his free hand.

“Don’t waste Celestina’s efforts in this.” Gokudera warned. “She looked so tired and worn out yesterday. Her gait is really bothersome too. I told her to refrain walking in heels but she hates wearing shoes.” He let go of Lambo’s cheeks and looked away. “She should have called me instead.” He mumbled, hands clenching. 

Sawada could hear the underlying thoughts in Gokudera’s words. With a kind smile, he turned to Lambo and gestured at the kitchen. “Lambo, go ahead inside. I’ll catch up with you later.” Lambo looked at the two men before he obeyed without any complaints.

When the youngest one is out of sight, Sawada couldn’t hide his frown from appearing. Sometimes, it was hard give the right advice to Gokudera for Sawada knew there are a lot he cannot really tell. “Did something happen between you and Celestina, Hayato?”

Gokudera’s eyes widened for a bit. He looked away, his hand gripping the coffee cup tighter. “I’m sorry, Decimo. I will try my best to bring back my productiveness-”

Sawada frowned. If anything, Gokudera’s productiveness increased for the past month. He raised his hand, whatever words trying to escape Gokudera’s mouth effectively halted inside his mind. “You’ve been doing quite impressive these days at work. You are not taking care of yourself properly again, Hayato.”

Gokudera stopped resorting to drowning in cigarettes, alcohol, and women just to vent out his frustrations and anger. He bothered going out of his office to get his meals. He tried his best to increase his water intake. He made sure that he would only smoke two packs a day for this month. He actually did some chores in his apartment. He would go home in that spacious apartment for rest, and during weekends, he would pretend that he is a normal person by experimenting on some dishes or watching whatever interests him. “I’ve changed my lifestyle, Decimo. So you don’t have to worry about me.”

It usually works when it is Celestina who does this kind of coping. Her siblings would buy her reason for being so aloof is because of work. Her parents would stop inquiring about her troubles when they see that she is happy and healthy.

“Hayato, something is bothering you.” Sawada slightly tilted his head to the side in inquiry. “We are called a family not because we are a mafia family. We’ve known each other since we were teenagers. I thought that being family means no secrets are kept, even those that bothers us. You are always so close to everyone, even to me. I am glad that you seem so relaxed when you are with Ms. Celestina. At least then, I am at ease that you found someone you feel like you don’t have to put up your guard.” His eyes remained in Gokudera’s face. “Lately that seemed to change. You try to reaching out to her. Honestly, you did not do that to anyone. But there’s something holding her back and it will leave you in this state.” He could see the heavy dark bags under Gokudera’s eyes, a testament of his sleepless nights. Gokudera has been in a daze lately, too distracted to listen to minor details or process the important ones.

Sawada abhorred Gokudera’s lifestyle before. He couldn’t really criticize Gokudera on how he wishes to live his life but he wished that Gokudera would at least try to open up to them so the pain he keeps sealed inside won’t be the end of him. Then, he stopped gradually. It wasn’t instant so it took Sawada some time to locate what made Gokudera change his mind. At first, he thought that his friend just found something else to waste his body on. But they noticed the healthy glow and lightness surrounding Gokudera after a year and a half of interacting with Celestina.

No one would fearlessly scold the right hand man for losing weight and looking so pale. Gokudera does not trust people so easily. He would not drink coffee or water from anyone who is outside the family. Celestina knew that he would drain the coffee in the bathroom sink but she kept on doing things for him, until she finally got through him.

Reborn once told Sawada that Bianchi wondered if her efforts were not enough to make Gokudera realize she cares for him like how most sisters would. At some point, Sawada wondered if their efforts were enough too, or if they just simply gave up and waited for Gokudera to open the door for them.

Gokudera looked at the vast hallway of the huge manor. He did not have a hard time memorizing every detail the manor offered to him in his first month of moving in. But that does not mean he likes the huge manor in itself. The reason he used to come home to this manor at the end of a tiring day is because they- his family who gave him a place to belong- are inside these walls. He felt contented that way because here, he belongs with them.

But some of the guardians started using this manor as simply their workplace. Sawada married Kyoko and they created a world of their own outside the manor. This was similar when Ryohei started going out with Hana. Hibari never stayed in Italy for a long period of time but he would always visit every month. Now he stays a lot in Namimori to protect his hometown where he made his own family. He comes to the manor only when the Vongola demands his help.

The fear of being thrown away crept in his heart that he started pushing people away. The people he viewed as family were not exempt from his instinct to combat fear. Then, after meeting with Celestina (who struggles to find where she belongs), he learned that he could also create a place where he could welcome persons in his life and still belong. The fear of being thrown out of the manor did not bother him anymore. Sawada is not that kind of person- that’s why he chose to serve him. Most of all, he found that having a life outside the mafia does not necessarily mean that he would pretend that he is not a Mafioso while interacting with the civilians.

 “I should have trusted her like how I should have trusted you.” Gokudera did not realize that there were tears in his eyes when he spoke. “I am scared that if I show any weakness to you, you won’t have a need for me. That I will have to jump from place to place just to find where I belong.”

From the start, it was him who wanted Celestina to prove her worth if she doesn’t want to be thrown away. She tried her best to belong, and yet he shoved her away.

Sawada shook his head. “You belong with my family, Hayato. Right-hand man or not. Bastard or not.” He smiled at Gokudera warmly, glad that he actually took the first step in allowing them to be part of his world. “I am sure she shares the same sentiment.”

I’m just here, Hayato.

And even when he shoved her away, she still provided for him a place to belong to.

Gokudera stared at his coffee before his eyes wandered to his wrist watch. He caressed the glass case of the watch, hoping to see her love for him is still intact.

He knew it to be impossible.

O~O~O

Celestina’s friends invited her to get some drinks in the newly opened bar in the business district. She wanted to decline the invitation, but she doesn’t feel like spending the night alone in her room. It’s horrible how she could cry all night, yet she could still hear her heart breaking.

So she accepted, simply following her friends. They conversed about the latest gossips, the stress they are dealing with at work, the plans they made for the next month as they walked towards the bar. Celestina listened to them talk, muttering a neutral response and urging them to talk because she doesn’t feel like sharing anything.

“Tina, isn’t this one of your clients’?” The loudest of their group, Bono, pointed at the building. He also practices private law but he came from a family of lawyers. When he opens up about anything, it is usually to brag on his achievements or ranting about how inadequate he was treated.

Celestina read the sign at the front door. V Construction Inc. Gokudera’s the CEO of this particular cover, being a licensed engineer, and convenient for the Vongola’s cover. “Yeah! Still bitter I beat your associate in that multi-million suit?”

Her friends laughed at how she was able to silence the loudest one with just a few words. Bono chose to talk with the kind Claire who simply listened.

Rosalie and the two guys were having a discussion about their experience with a criminal case. Celestina trailed behind the group, giving up entirely on pretending that she was listening to their anecdotes.

They arrived at the bar and Celestina became the baby of the group. Even though she doesn’t give them much credit, they know that she can’t hold her alcohol much because she never trained her body to be used to it.

They offered her the sweet cocktail they knew she would enjoy. When she finished her third glass, Celestina was blushing to her neck. She was feeling sleepy and tired. Her friends kept on talking about random things. Some of them asked her if she’s all right in between their laughs and a loud anecdote of some horrible court experience.

Celestina felt warm. She took off her coat, and cooled herself by placing the glass on her cheek.

Rosalie was talking about one boy she dated. Beside the charming girl was Claire, crying for some reason.

Bono and Antonov went to the designated smoking area for their fix.

Celestina opened her mouth to speak after she recovered from laughing at her friends’ antics, just to let out the load from her chest.

Grace suddenly stood, and told them of the childhood dream she tried to take on a few weeks ago. “I made a rendition of ‘American Pie’ thinking it was some singing audition. Turns out I was singing in front of some circus folks in town.”

Celestina laughed again, letting her friends talk. She decided that sharing such shallow misfortune is not worth it. They have a heavier load to bear. Fallen dreams, impending divorce, moving on from said divorce, constantly trying to get the approval of one’s family- they are experiencing a more problematic issue than nursing her broken heart. She drank two more glasses of the berry cocktail.

One of her friends, Claire perhaps, warned her for the third time that the house blend is very strong despite its sweet taste.

She told them that she would leave after five minutes. No one wanted to go home just yet- it was still too early.

She agreed that the night is still young, but she felt tired already. The area is relatively safer, but Antonov insisted on waiting a cab with her.

Celestina took small steps, hoping that she wouldn’t stumble on the pavement. The autumn air made her feel cold so she wore her coat. The chilly breeze felt good against her warm cheeks.

Antonov was telling her about some song he heard featuring Orpheus.

They laughed when Celestina gave an analogy on looking back in horror movies.

“Anton, am I beautiful?” Celestina asked, the laughter in her tone disappearing.

For a moment, her friend was taken back at her question. “You never liked being the beautiful one, Tine, no matter how many times we tell you that you are in fact a beauty.” He checked for Celestina’s body temperature. It was the first time he saw her be conscious over something and he knew right then and there that she wanted to drink because of something weighing her down. “All right, go home. You are drunk! Let’s talk when we’re sober and not muddled with alcohol.”

They shared another round of laughter.

Celestina wiped her eyes, knowing that there were tears at the corners. “Anton, you go inside. You’re missing out on the fun while waiting here with me. I’ll send a message if I got a ride and all.”

Antonov shook his head. “It’s rare to have your company. They can wait.” He patted her shoulder, sincerely missing her company for the past months.

A few seconds later, the two of them were singing ‘American Pie’ with wrong the lyrics.

‘Good ol’ boys were singing whiskey and rye

Drinking this will be the day that I die’

Celestina hit the notes well.

Antonov laughed, clutching his stomach. “It’s drinking whiskey and rye!”

She laughed boisterously, chest heaving to supply her body with air. The streets remained empty. They played ‘I spy’ for the past ten minutes, and sharing some anecdotes of their life for the past years as if they weren’t drinking their hearts out almost two months ago.

A black car stopped in front of them. It was a Porsche, the latest model. Celestina laughed at how polished and shiny it was. Then her laughter was cut short when Gokudera emerged from the car, scowling at her.

“I’ll bring you home.” The silver haired Mafioso kindly offered.

“Soooo~” Antonov drawled. “You like handsome rich guys. Figures.”

Celestina shook her head, her hands orchestrating a wide array of gestures. “No, it’s not like that! He’s just a kind man to give me a ride. He’s my client’s right hand man, of sorts.” She gave Antonov a thumbs up. “But he’s handsome, yep.”

There was a teasing glint in her eyes when she glanced at Gokudera who was approaching them. The Storm guardian was studying Antonov warily, the hand inside his pocket holding a dynamite just in case.

Antonov bid his farewell before going inside the bar, kindly reminding her to send a message when she gets home, or somewhere with a roof and four walls. He winked as he sped towards the door, narrowly missing the slap Celestina sent him.

Gokudera held her shoulders when she almost tripped on the pavement. He bent slightly to check if she’s okay. She smelled of some berry and alcohol, no doubt enjoying the special house blend of the bar. “How many glasses did you consume?” He scowled, turning her around so she could see where she’s heading. He held her shoulders to support her, making sure she won’t fall.

“Five, I think.” Celestina answered, holding on Gokudera’s hands as she stopped. She closed her eyes to keep the world around her from spinning.

“Oi!” Gokudera leaned forward towards her. But then she continued her way towards his car, all the while holding the hand on her shoulder for support. “You shouldn’t have drunk that large amount especially when you get tipsy after drinking a lot of wine.”

“It was sweet and delicious!” She felt her world spin when she bent to get inside the car. “I am regretting it already. If I throw up, this is payback for that time.” She wanted to make sure that she would not be compelled to pay him, especially since she was riding his very expensive Ferrari.

Gokudera rolled his eyes as he closed the front door.

O~O~O

Gokudera glanced at his companion in the passenger seat.

She was holding on the seatbelt tightly. Her eyes were droopy, a bit teary after yawning soundlessly. She leaned against the leather seat, completely disregarding the responsibilities of one sitting on the front seat.

Gokudera stopped when he reached an intersection. The red traffic light was on. He brushed away a stray strand of hair from her face. “This is my fault.” He stared at her face slightly illuminated by the street light. She looked at ease now that she was sleeping, compared to the way she would refrain looking at him in the eyes when they talked, or how she would fidget when Tsuna would ask if there’s something wrong.

The lights turned green, and Gokudera kept his attention on the road. Silence accompanied him for a few seconds until he heard a sigh.

“It’s no one’s fault, Hayato.” Celestina sat straight, her hands dropping to her lap. “I wanted to join my friends in the bar.”

“No. I meant what happened that night.” His grip on the steering wheel tightened. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the road for fear that he might see how he hurt her. It was that same fear that made him mutter harsh words to her that night, instead of thanking her for her hospitality.

Celestina’s hand covered the hand that was nearer her. His hand was big, rough and callous. Hers is smaller, softer because she was raised to such meticulous standard of caring for her body, and a bit callous from writing. “It’s all right. It’s not your fault.”

“I should have trusted you.” His voice trembled. He waited for her to pull her hand away, ask him to stop the car and shout at how insensitive he is. He deserved it, really.

She squeezed his hand a little bit. “I told you before it doesn’t have to be mutual.” She softly muttered. “Growing up in your environment will really make you think twice of a person’s motives. I practically confessed to you despite not really knowing you that much. I never saw ‘the you’ from before you reached this stage. It was presumptuous of me to deduct things, really.”

He slammed the brakes, the car abruptly halting in the middle of an empty highway. Thankfully, their seatbelts kept them rooted in their seat. “Stop putting the blame on yourself, damn it!”

She pulled her hand back, cradling it with the other on her chest. She couldn’t look at him in the eye.

“You should be angry at me for being such a coward! I can’t even stay true to myself because I don’t want to be the one who gets left behind.” Gokudera remembered the pianist who turned out to be his mother. After he ran away, he went from one family to another, hoping that they would accept him as part of their family. Even the Vongola ninth merely accepted him as a freelancer, but not part of the Vongola family because he is a bastard child whose father did not even stop him from running away. In fact, he was only given a monthly stipend.

“I was angry.” Celestina admitted. “But I could not remain angry at you for so long because you are not the only one at fault here. I tried so hard to push my feelings for you.”

“I can’t even let you in because I am scared that you might leave me once you discover that I am an unwanted bastard. I am scared that you might not love me anymore once you see that I have this tendency to hurt those around me because I don’t know how to show that I care. I am scared to tell you how much I love you because I don’t want to be left behind.” Gokudera didn’t know he was crying until she cupped his cheeks and wiped his tears with her thumb. “I got scared that you might get hurt for putting me before you.”

She unbuckled her seatbelt and wrapped her arms around him. “That is not being a coward. It is being human.”

It was only then that Gokudera let the floodgates open. He too, unbuckled his belt and engulfed Celestina in an embrace. He leaned against her shoulder, letting his senses be overwhelmed by her scent. He pulled her closer and she patted his back to soothe him.

He cannot remember the last time he cried so hard. He was now trembling, but he did not mind being so vulnerable in front of Celestina.

O~O~O

An hour later, they were in Celestina’s backyard. Lately, her older sister and his husband have to go overseas for their respective work. They left their children at her care for a week. She didn’t bother taking down the tent they have set-up where they could watch the stars all night long.

This time, two adults are watching the night sky. There were no clouds to cover the bright stars and the crescent moon.

“How did you know I was there?” Celestina asked, turning to Gokudera who seemed to be watching her for quite some time.

“I always keep an eye on you to make sure you are safe.” He was on his side, his arm under his head as a pillow. “You are unsuspicious of your surroundings.”

“You don’t have to feel responsible for me.” She immediately crushed the seeds of hope in her heart. He is expected to know the whereabouts of the people who work for them, after all. “Also, that is kind of creepy.”

‘I’m stupid that way.’ How come most people around her knows how to deal with this sort of thing?

“We do that to all people associated with us. Once you are in the safety of your house, we live you alone.” He volunteered.

Recently, Gokudera has been dreaming of what-could-have-been. He would dream that she moved in with him in that apartment where they both decorated and designed. He would dream that he would cook her favorite meals during New Year to celebrate her birthday. He would dream that she would take him out of his office whenever he feels too stressed. He would dream that they are sharing the bed peacefully sleeping and waking up in each other’s arms.

He would dream that she would be the person he would go home to after a tiring mission.

She still worked with them as usual. She still would take pains in providing him the little comfort he needs but he could see her dimmed smiles.

Most of all, he wanted her to remain in his life not just as their legal counsel.

Words are hard for him to express. So, he wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer instead.

Celestina accepted his embrace and buried his face on his chest.

“I will not hurt you again.” Gokudera’s voice was laced with promise. She remained silent, neither protesting nor accepting his resolve. It is better than being pushed away by her.

“I told you, I’m just here. You don’t have the obligation to-”

“I will not hurt you again.” His cupped her cheeks and made her look up to him so it would be clear that she understands what he was trying to tell her. “You don’t have to answer now. I understand your hesitation.”

Celestina learned not to wish for more. She would rather accept whatever he could give her than make the mistake of waiting for him to enter her heart. 

Loving someone doesn’t mean that they should always be together like how fairy tales portrayed true love. “Hayato, it’s all right. You don’t have to do this.”

He only tightened his hold on her. He wanted her to understand that he will not make the same mistake twice. “I don’t want to lose you.”

Gokudera knows that it will take some time for her to let him in. But it took an exploded body, a man laughing to his death, and a gunshot wound before he realized her worth in his life. It would be fair if he would have to bathe in flowing lahar for her to accept him again.

What he didn’t know is that Celestina had already forgiven him. ‘I’m stupid that way.’ She told him before and it rings true for her that night.

After that night, Gokudera and Celestina interacted like how they used to as if the strain in their relationship did not happen.