Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Y/N rolled in their bed, it was late, and they couldn't sleep, they were shaken after the death of one of their best friends, Wilbur.

Y/N had never lived in L'manberg, but the country to be blown up still hurt them, they had been living in a shack near Technoblade's residence, it was just one room, there was an outhouse at the back of the shack.

Y/N blinked their eyes, they were facing a wall, clutching onto the yellow and green sheets, Technoblade was the same as ever, still as monotone as they first met thirteen years ago, it was like Technoblade didn't care about his twin, it made the gears in Y/N's head turn.

The light hit Y/N in the eyes, they groaned, they had stayed up all night, with no sleep, Y/N rolled onto their back, "happy eighteenth birthday to me~" they sang, they wanted to celebrate it with Wilbur and all their friends, but, the plans had... blown up.

Y/N shuffled out of bed, they started to make tea, it would wake them up, while the water boiled Y/N went over their clothes, they were going to go see L'manberg, or what was left, at least, they pulled a white sweater over their head, pulling a pair of sweatpants on, Y/N turned their head as the kettle started wheezing, the sign that the water was done, Y/N got a cup from one of the cupboards, put a teabag in it and poured the boiling water.

Y/N looked longingly out of the window they were in front of, they leaned on the counter as the tea waited, then a pink-haired man appeared in front of it, looking straight at them, Technoblade looked at Y/N, the sun behind him making him look like he was going to murder them, but all he did was knock on the window and pointing towards the door, Y/n quickly looked at the door and back, Tehcnoblade had vanished, so Y/N went to the door.

When Y/N opened the door, behind it was standing Technoblade, holding a pair of frozen flowers, his pink hair was nicely braided and was over his shoulder, "happy birthday," he bluntly said, giving Y/N the flowers, they looked at the tall halfling, they took the flowers and invited the tall man in, "do you want tea?" asked Y/N, putting the frozen flowers in a pot of slightly warm water, to help the flowers melt, Technoblade shook his head, he sat down on the pink beanbag that laid east from the door in the corner, Y/N nodded, finally taking a sip of their tea, sitting down on the single dining chair.

The two were quiet, not even breathing could be heard in the house, then the silence was broken by Technoblade, "are you going to go L'manberg today?"  Y/N looked at him, "yeah, I was planning to," they said quietly, taking another sip of their tea, "well, say sorry to Wilbur for me, would you?" said Technoblade looking Y/N in the eyes, the emotion behind his eyes was something Y/N had not seen in the thirteen years they've known each other.

Then the room went silent again, "don't worry, I will," said Y/N looking at Technoblade, who was, in turn, looking down at his lap. It had been an hour or two, and Technoblade had left, the roses had melted, they looked a bit dead, but Y/N guessed they wouldn't really look alive after getting frozen, Y/N put on their large coat and opened the door to the freezing outside that was the north, they started to make their way to the nether portal, it was a good twenty-minute walk from Y/N's shack.

Y/N finally got to the portal, they walked in, taking off the coat as the hot air hit their face, they started walking through the nether, to the L'manburg portal, Y/N wrapped the sleeves of the coat around their waist, the crunch of burn ground underneath their legs with each step, ash and holes from ghasts littered the nether floor, or, ledge, it is, Y/N made their way on the bridge connecting most of the nether continents, looking down at the lava pit, they held tightly to the railing, it was scary.

Y/N stood at the portal, the damage was worse than they thought, they had only heard about it, they could see it from the portal, they started walking, people were trying to salvage the ground, and houses and other things, it hurt Y/N to see.

They walked past Fundy, he wasn't crying, he looked like how Technoblade usually was, nothing behind his eyes, it hurt them, Wilbur was Fundy's father, he wasn't the best father, everyone knew that but Wilbur cared about his son, and it seemed as Fundy didn't care back, anymore at least, Y/N walked to where Wilbur's grave was located, in the outskirts of the blown-up L'manberg, Y/N had picked up a dying poppy from the shell of what used to be a country, they put the flower next to the grave.

They read was on the grave as they sat in silence, "a beloved father and son" it read, but the 'beloved' part was crossed over with red sharpie, and over it read 'shitty' Y/N sighed, "Technoblade said he was sorry," Y/N said, closing their eyes, they  heard as soft footsteps came closer, but Y/N didn't open their eyes until it yelled "Y/N!" Y/N's eyes opened wide open, they turned around fast, there he stood, someone, no, something that resembled Wilbur. 

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Y/N looked the ghost straight in the face, who smiled, he gave out his hand, "it's nice to see you again, Y/N!" he said.

Something felt odd to Y/N, they tried to reach the ghost's hand, but their hand just went through, the ghost put his hand over his mouth, "oh no..." he said as if he didn't know he was a ghost, Y/N was cold, it wasn't even that cold, it was just that something about the ghost made chills go down Y/N's spine.

"I missed you, Y/N, you know," the ghost of Wilbur said, but Y/N didn't answer, they just looked at the being, no one had even acknowledged the translucent man right in front of Y/N, so Y/N shook their head, "you're not real," Y/M managed to stutter out, the ghost just sat down in front of Y/N, "Technoblade was sorry?" he asked, trying to place his hand on top pf Y/N but it went straight through.

Y/N's hand was cold, they took it close to their chest, warming it up, "y-yeah, he said to tell you he was sorry," Y/N said, panicking slightly, the ghost smiled, "okay!" as if he didn't know who Technoblade was and was just going with it.

It had been who knows long until someone noticed the ghost, to Y/N's surprise it was Tommy, he was walking towards the grave, when he saw the ghost trying to touch Y/N's H/C hair, he dropped whatever he was holding, and let it roll down the hill, Y/N could see Tommy right through the ghost man, Tommy was wide-eyed, he gulped before coming closer, "W-Wilbur..?" he said as he approached the two, the ghost turned his head, waving his arm to greet Tommy, "Hello!" he said.

The trio stayed silently at the grave, the ground slowly turning cold from the ghost's stay, "Wilbur," Tommy started, but the ghost put, or at least tried to put his finger on Tommy's lips, to quiet him, "please, call me ghostbur!" said the ghost, Tommy and Y/N nodded, then looked at each other, "Wil- Ghostbur, do you remember anything from before the explosion?" asked Tommy, looking at the ghost, the ghost innocently shook his head, crossing his legs and swaying back and front, "he's like a child..." Y/N whispered to Tommy, making sure the ghost couldn't hear them, Tommy nodded, "but at least he isn't insane, like before," Tommy whispered, Y/N looked down at their lap, "yeah, but I still miss him," they said, looking at the remains of the man, the ghost of the once-beloved man.

Y/N was walking home, the moon was high and zombies and skeletons roamed the dark snow-filled biome, Y/N had decided to take a stroll through the destroyed L'manberg, to hear its history and what memories Tommy had made with Wilbur, Tubbo, Niki, Jack and Fundy.

Y/N was mad they weren't a part of L'manberg, Wilbur had let Fundy, his son join, who was only a few years older, and had dumped them to Technoblade who barely even talked to them anymore, they sighed, pushing their hands deeper into the pockets of the jacket.

The light from Technoblade's cabin shined onto the snow, meaning Y/N was soon at home, their stomach grumbled, they hadn't eaten anything all day, and the smell of stew coming from Technoblade's cabin made them even more hungry, so they decided to stop by.

Y/N knocked on the door, and within the minute the tall, pink-haired man opened the door and let them in, "hungry?" Technoblade simply asked, Y/N nodded taking off their coat and putting it on the coatrack, Technoblade nodded and got a bowl for Y/N, and poured some stew in it, putting it in front of Y/N who was already sitting down at the table, "thanks," said Y/N, who started to eat the food, Technoblade smiled, it was rare to see Technoblade smiling sweetly if he did smile it was that psychopathic smile he did when winning a fight or killing something or someone.

Y/N placed the utensils down after they finished eating, they were full, leaning back on the chair, Technoblade looked outside as he collected the dishes, "it's really late... I don't think you should go outside anymore," he said, looking at Y/N, who nodded, "yeah, and I'm full," Technblade nodded taking a seat on the couch, "you can sleep in my bed," Y/N turned to look at Technoblade, "no!" they said, "I can sleep on the couch, it's no problem," they said getting up and sat down next to Technoblade, who shook his head, "you're the guest, you can sleep in my bed." Y/N looked at Technoblade, "we're friends, I'm gonna be completely fine with sleeping on the couch," Technoblade started playing with Y/N's H/C H/L hair, "because you're my friend, I want you to sleep in my bed, it's more comfortable," he said, Y/N shook their head again, "I have a compromise, what if we both sleep in your bed?" Y/N said, not really wanting to fight with the thick-skulled Technoblade, he slowly nodded in agreement, Y/N clapped their hands once and said, "great! I'm tired, I'm gonna go to bed now! and I better see you come sleep next to me," Y/N looked sternly at Technoblade who was still seated on the couch.

Y/N had taken the liberty to go through Technoblade's closet, they found a shirt that was a bit too big for them but not ridiculously too big, and made their way to bed, Y/N basically melted into the thick mattress, Y/N placed their head on the pillow and snuggled under the warm covers, then after a few minutes Y/N heard Technoblade make his way up the ladder, Y/N smiled, but kept their eyes closed.

After a few minutes of clothing ruffling, Technoblade got under the covers with Y/N, and hugged them from behind to get a good position, Y/N snuggled into the touch and in a matter of minutes both of them fell asleep.

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Y/N's eyes slowly fluttered open, they closed them again, though, they were tired, but Technoblade got up, Y/N sighed at the loss of the heat, it was still warm but not as warm when Technoblade was there, Y/N still kept their eyes closed, pulling their legs close to their chest to keep warm. Y/N heard as Technoblade finished getting ready for the morning, they heard as he walked back to bed, sitting down, "It's time to wake up, Y/N" he said, his morning voice was low and amazing, Y/N fell back onto their back, as they were on their side facing the wall, they looked at Technoblade, not saying a word. The eye contact between the two was long and odd. Technoblade didn't like eye contact, as it most of the time made the voices think the person who made eye contact wanted to fight, then they would start the usual, "blood for the blood god" chant.

Technoblade finally stood up, "breakfast" was the only thing he said, Y/N knew what it meant, he was going to make breakfast, he was an excellent cook. Y/N got out of bed, they heard as Technoblade shuffled in the kitchen below, Y/N smiled, getting their clothes from before, except they didn't take off Technoblade's shirt, they just tucked it into their sweatpants and went downstairs.

Y/N sat down at the table, waiting patiently for Technoblade's food. It was quiet, not too quiet though as the howl of the wind outside and the banging on the door? what? Y/N looked at the door, the same with Technoblade, "I can go open that." Y/N said, getting up from the seat at the table, walking to the wooden door, they opened it, and on the other side, in the snow stood a boy and a ghost, Tommy and Wilbur, or whatever was left, Ghostbur. Tommy was shivering and holding his arms, as he was only wearing his red and white shirt and shorts, while Ghostbur was a ghost he couldn't feel cold, but he was wearing a yellow sweater, stained in blue, his hands were blue, he handed Y/N a blue thing and said, "here, have some blue!" the blue stained Y/N hand, "C-can we come in?" asked Tommy, shivering from the cold, sneezing once or twice after, Y/N couldn't look at Tommy suffering so they stepped from the door letting the duo in, Technoblade stared at Tommy, growling, "Techno, please-" Y/N said, placing the blue they got from Ghostbur on the table staining it, too. Technoblade ignored at elephant in the room as he ate, the ghost trying to talk to him, "Techno! you're my brother!" said the ghost enthusiastically giddying around the first floor while Tommy was next to the fire pit warming himself up, Y/N took a bite of the breakfast, trying not to look at Wilbur... Ghostbur because it still brought up memories, "so... uhm... why are you here?" asked Y/N looking at Tommy, he looked back, "Ghostbur wanted, saying something about forgiving an apology?" Tommy said, making Technoblade freeze, not in the literal sense, of course.

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"I don't know why you said sorry, but I forgive you!" said Ghostbur, Tommy and Y/N left the two to "bond" even though Technoblade didn't look too good around the ghost, "where are all of his gapples?!" whined Tommy as he swept through Techno's basement chests, "first chest on the bottom right," Y/N responded, barely paying attention to Tommy, as they listened to Ghostbur's and Techno's conversation, "it's not eavesdropping if you're worried..." Y/N whispered to themself, "what.." asked Tommy as he looked at Y/N, who was silent, "are you even listening?!" Tommy yelled, "y-yeah..." said Y/N clearly not paying attention, Tommy sighed, pushing Y/N alm9ost to the point that they fell down, they caught themselves on the wall, "what the hell, Tommy?!" Y/N whisper yelled, wide-eyed, staring at Tommy, "you weren't paying attention to me!" yelled Tommy, going back to rummaging Techno's chests, "I don't have to pay attention to you when you rummaging Techno's stuff.." pointed out Y/N crossing their arms, Tommy just waved his backhand at them, "I don't care, pay attention to me." Y/N rolled their eyes, "just tell me if we alerted Techno and Wil..." Tommy stopped his sentence, "Ghostbur," he finished, he clearly wasn't used to Wilbur being a ghost, Y/N's look softened, they blinked a bit, trying to stop what little tears were forming, "I wish I knew Wilbur better," they finally said, Tommy looked at them, "you don't want to." he gulped, "he went insane. the worst type of insane." Tommy said Y/N raised a brow, "the worst type of insane?" they asked, Tommy nodded, "you might not know this but, Techno, he went cray-cray back when I was a wee child" Tommy said, putting his hands in his shorts' pockets, "the only reason I'm really alive is that Wilbur could take care of Techno when father dearest couldn't." Tommy continued, putting an awful amount of weight onto "father" Y/N looked at Tommy, "his voices? right? that's not really the best type of crazy..." Tommy shook his head, "no, no, no, no, no... you don't get it." Tommy's voice and stature were heavy, he was talking about something dark, Tommy shifted from his left leg to his right, "you see... he tried to kill me," Y/N looked at Tommy, empathy lacing their E/C eyes, "he tried to kill me because he felt betrayed that he didn't come back because he promised to come back." Tommy shrunk into himself, Y/N let their arms down, they were quiet, "I don't remember what he even looks like..." Tommy said the two were quiet, "your dad?" Tommy nodded, "but I was told that..." Tommy started, small tears forming in his eyes, but he wiped them away, "I was told by Fundy and a few other witnesses that he killed Wilbur..." Tommy finished, he was shaking, and on the verge of crying, the boy did care about his brother a lot, "why did he have to come back and take away what little pieces I had left of a family?" Tommy said, taking a shaky breath afterwards, Y/N's eyes were almost open wide, their mouth agape, they walked to Tommy, who was on the verge of tears, on the verge of a panic attack of some kind, and hugged him, he stopped for a second, but hugged back, he started noiselessly crying onto Y/N shoulder, taking a tight grip on the back of the fabric shirt they were wearing.

on the other side of the house at the same time

"I accept your apology!" Ghostbur said happily dancing around the house, messing it up in blue, "I don't know what it was, but I forgive you!" he sang as he danced, Technoblade was sitting on the couch, he was frozen, he could barely move, and he couldn't look at Ghostbur, he couldn't listen to Ghostbur, all his sing-songy acceptance of apologies was drowned out by the voices, the voices were confused, not about the thing Technoblade apologized for, but why Ghostbur was here, "what are we gonna do?!" yelled a prominent voice, "I don't know!" yelled another, Technoblade had had the voices for so long he could recognize almost all of them, they all had their own little personality, "maybe he's here to haunt us!" another voice said, it wasn't a prominent voice, "why would he haunt us if we said 'sorry'?!" yelled another, "E" yelled another one, Technoblade raised a brow at the "E" sayer, "that was odd." he thought, "Technoblade!" yelled a prominent voice, "we don't know what to do!" it continued,Technobade put his hands on his head tightly gripping the pink, braided hair, "Ghostbur..." he said, Ghostbur shut up and looked at Technoblade, "could you please go check on Tommy and Y/N? they've been down there forever." said Technoblade, Ghostbur smield and nodded, "OK!" he yelled before going down on the floor, and into the basement.

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Ghostbur made his way to the basement, there he saw Y/N and Tommy hugging, so he joined in, "I don't know why you're hugging but I'm here!" he said, all happy, Y/N let Tommy and Ghostbur hug, walking back a few steps and looking at the brothers they sighed, going up the ladder to where Technoblade was, they looked around for a moment, but he wasn't anywhere, Y/N furrowed their brows, going up one more floor, but he wasn't there either, now Y/N was getting worried, not because he could hurt, god, no, they were worried it might've been the voices that took over him and went to attack some innocent person. Y/N made their way back to the first floor, still, no sign of Techno, so, they made the hard decision of going out and looking for the tall man.

"Techno?"

"Techno?~"

Y/N walked in the cold forest, following some footprints they found. Using their cupped hands as a way to amplify their voice they yelled out "Techno!" a few times. Y/N put their hand into their jacket pockets, they shivered, it was freezing, way too cold for Y/N but not for Technoblade, his thick skin kept his body heat in while Y/N's very frail skin barely kept the warmth in. In the friends' past, they used to cuddle in the coldest of winter nights, as the passing of Technoblade's body heat over to Y/N kept him from overheating, and at the same time kept Y/N warm.

"Techno..?"

"Techno..."

At this point, Y/N had walked for hours, they were tired, but they were determined to find their friend. It started snowing, Y/N panicked, not only did they lose Techno's footprints, but they also lost theirs, even though they had lived here for years they never went into the forest, as Technoblade had warned them not to go there, so they didn't, but now, they were lost in the deep dark woods, looking for their friend.

"Techno..."

"Tech-..."

Y/N laid against a fallen tree trunk, it was too cold to continue. They pulled their almost frozen legs close to their chest to keep what little body heat they had left. Y/N blinked slowly, their breathing slowing massively, slowly losing consciousness, they let out one last call, "Techno..." before losing consciousness.

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"Cold."

Y/N woke up in a very not frozen and snow-filled opening in the forest, "what?" they asked, they looked around, they weren't in the snowy forest anymore, "did... did I die?" Y/N asked, looking down at their hands, they got up, looking around, they decided to walk one way, continuing until they noticed that they were on the other side where they started walking, they looked back, "what the..?" they said, walking back to the middle of the opening.

"Cold?"

Y/N stared at the blue sky above them, they had been in the forest for what? hours at this point, They didn't know what to do, they were stuck, they couldn't go anywhere, and they had also discovered that periodically from the forest surrounding them would come voices of the people they were close to, aka, Technoblade and Tommy, screams of agony, hysterical laughter of a maniac, cries of help, frantic whispering among others.

"Help?"

A shiver crawled down Y/N spine as they heard something unusual from the normal periodical sounds of agony, their own voice calling out, "Techno?" they stared, wide-eyed at the blue sky, slowly getting up and staring where the voice came from, "what the actual hell?" Y/N questioned, but up and moved toward it.

"Help."

As Y/N got closer to the part of the forest where the voice came from, they weren't teleported back to the other side of the opening, They looked around for a moment, then kept going. after twenty steps into the forest floor, the green trees slowly greyed and died, they were at the foot of the fallen tree, there was their body laid, cold and frosted, but someone was at the foot of them, they walked closer, to see who it was, it was Technoblade, his eyes were wide and full of sorrow, he took them closer to his body, crying? Y/N let a squeak of sadness getting closer to Technoblade and their body, hugging him, seeing him cry for the first time was making them cry, they closed their eyes, but as they opened them again, they weren't viewing Technoblade from the third person, they themself were in his hands, they tried to speak, but all that came out was a squeak, Technoblade shook his head, slowly petting Y/N's H/L H/C hair "don't" he softly said, keeping Y/N close.

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When Y/N finally woke, they weren't in the eternal forest, nor the freezing forest, they were at Technoblade's home, they were slightly cold so they tried pulling the white covers over more of themself, but to no avail, they were still cold, they sighed, they were tired even if it felt like they had slept a thousand years, they noticed something move next to them, something big-ish... Ghostbur laid his ghost head on their shoulder, sleeping peacefully, who knew that ghosts needed sleep? not Y/N.

"Ghostbur?" Y/N asked, looking at the ghost who was cuddling them. Ghostbur didn't answer or even open his eyes, only tightening his grip on Y/N, which was new to them, as such showings of affections were rare of Wilbur when he was alive, but Ghostbur, he looked like he would do something like this, and he was cuddling Y/N. He was cold and a ghost, so he was partway through Y/N which was a weird sight to see. Y/N got up, trying not to awake the sleepy ghost boy, getting off the bed they noticed that they were in Technoblade's room, they smiled, getting off the bed, they weren't sure whose clothing they wearing, as they were slightly over-sized, but not like how big Techno's clothes were on them, they were wearing black sweatpants, and a white men's tank top, Y/N didn't own a men's white tank top, but it wasn't Techno sized, so it couldn't've been his.

"Good morning!" came an echo behind Y/N as they were looking for their stuff, it scared the bejesus out of Y/N, making them jump, "oh, Ghostbur! you're awake!" Y/N said, looking back at the bed to see Ghostbur seated on the bed, looking back at them, "Yeah, about that..." started Ghostbur, rubbing the back of his neck, "I actually don't need to sleep, I was awake the whole time, Techno told me to keep you in bed," Ghostbur said, patting beside him, oh? "why do I need to stay in bed? it feels like I've slept a million years!" Y/N exclaimed, Ghostbur gave Y/N a small smile, "you kinda did..." he said, "you were in a coma-like state for four weeks." Ghostbur stated. Y/N's eyes widened, "w-what?" Y/N asked, looking at the ghost, "when you left to find Techno, he came back like twenty minutes after you left, and we couldn't find you, so he went looking for you." Ghostbur said, still tapping the bed next to him, "t-that doesn't explain anything, though" Y/N said, walking to the bed and sitting down next to Ghostbur, "I wasn't finished." Ghostbur said, all happy. "he told me when he finally found you in the woods, you had uhm... how do I put this?" Ghostbur continued, turning to Y/N he took their hand or tried as his hands went kinda through theirs, "you had died of hypothermia." Ghostbur said, giving Y/N the most empathic look he could muster, "but then, you came to life," he continued, Y/N looked at him, wide-eyed. "so when you two came back, he set you here, and told me not to leave your side, and left." Ghostbur said, "Tommy left to get some stuff, the clothes you're wearing, he found those somewhere in Pogtopia." Ghostbur said smiling, "wait, wait, wait- Techno just got up and left?!" Y/N asked, brows frowning, "yeah, and he hasn't been here at all in the past four weeks." Ghostbur answered, Y/N looked down at their lap, Ghostbur brought his right hand to their cheek, "well, if it makes you feel better, Tommy came daily checking up on you!" Ghostbur said, trying to make Y/N happy. "that's good, I guess." Y/N said, getting up, "no- don't get up," Ghostbur started, Y/N shook their head, "no, I'm gonna go find Techno." Y/N said, sturdy, going downstairs, there, Y/N could see a small layer of dust everywhere, it really had been four weeks. Ghostbur followed them, "please, he'll be back!" Ghostbur tried to stop them, but Y/N didn't budge and walked to the door, putting on the first pair of boots they could find that fit, they opened the door, "Ghostbur, I'm going to fin him," Y/N said, Ghostbur shook his head, "NO!" Ghostbur yelled, taking ahold of their hand, "he went to the prison." Ghostbur said, Y/N stared at Ghostbur, "the what now?!" Y/N said they hadn't known there was a prison, "yeah. the prison. Dream went to prison," Ghostbur said, trying to drag Y/N back inside as it had started to snow. "Dream went to prison..?" Y/N asked, eyes wide, they knew Dream was trouble, but they never realized he'd never pay for whatever bullshit he did, "yeah, he did." answered Ghostbur, "and he killed and revived Tommy," he continued, Y/N's already wide eyes widened even more, "HE WHAT?!" Y/N yelled out in anger, Tommy was a child and Dream killed him, "I don't know the details, but yeah." Ghostbur said Y/N stormed out the door, "Y/N! wait!" Ghostbur said, running after them.