Archive of Our Own ^beta

"Moi amour! Moi amour!." France calls out as he walks into his snake room, staring at the giant snake tank on the floor. There he is. His beautiful naga iggy.

There is snake shit all over the place and it reeks. France feels puke coming up. He swallows it back down. Mmm.. breakfast #2 but he was still hungry.

He opens the tank door and sticks a hand in. Iggh hissed and goes to bite. "Oi blimey back off ye wanka!!" Iggs screams and hisses. France notices he is curled around something.

"What's this?"

Iggy looks a way

France notices what it is... its...its a FUCKING EGG!

"MOI AMOUR!!! GIVE ME THAT. HAVE YOU BEEN MATING WITH ANYONE OTHRT THEN MOI? YOU ARE ON BIRTH CONTROL NON?."

france reaches in and grabs the egg. Iggy screams and shoots piss all over his hand. This is called MUSKING. Some snakes do this when scared btw.

Anyways now mr France has the eggy. He sniffs it. Smells like shit... and theres a...a baby naga inside. "Who the ... why... how ?"

Iggy is crying "don't hurt my baby... its.. hes ours. I named him allan...I..."

Frances stomach growls. He shuts the tank and iggy bangs against it with his fists. "YOU FUCK. YOU FRENCH FUCK BLOODY HELL BLOODY HELL MATE. YE GIVE HIM BACK YE HERE!?"

BUT FRANCE IS GONE

In the kitchen.. france cracks the egg open over a skillet and fries it. He is a bitter boy . He grabs a fork and some salt and eats... his own child now reduced to a fries egg...