Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The empty coffee cup was discarded in the trash right outside the parking lot, the woman sighing as she ran her fingers through her hair. Another day of working at a job she hated.

Catherine hated interning at the hospital. Her mom and step-dad constantly pushed their expectations of her becoming a nurse or doctor down her throat, and she was sure that she’d snap one day. She hated everything about hospitals. The tools, the deaths that happened, guests that never cared showing up when you’re an inch away from death, and the smell . She despised the squeaking perfect, pristine smell of the hospital, yet she was walking to it anyway. 

There were few people out. A little boy playing catch with his dad. An elderly couple sitting together on a nearby bench. What caught Catherine’s eye was a blonde teenager, stumbling in her mother’s arms as she shuffled away from the green grass and to the hospital entrance. The blonde made brief eye contact with Catherine, bags lining dark blue eyes. Blue eyes that made the girl seem like she was made of stardust, although her frail body couldn’t say the same. Catherine tore her eyes away from the girl, uncomfortable, and paused momentarily, allowing the girl and her mother to enter the hospital and shuffle out of sight. Catherine refused to look up until a minute later when she was sure she wouldn’t see her again. Her legs suddenly felt heavy and her heart started beating faster. 

She walked up to the front desk and showed her paperwork. The lady sitting there, obviously unhappy about being interrupted from what she was doing, signed the forms Catherine brought and dismissively waved her off. Catherine rolled her eyes as she took the forms once again and read what was written on the paper. Room 3105. She had been on that side of the floor before, passing by whenever she was assigned to the Radiology Department. Room 3105 was a part of the hospital's Critical Care Unit. She silently prayed that she didn’t have to see any blood where it didn’t belong. She despised the sight of blood.

Catherine seriously did not understand the need for her internship at Bright Moon Hospital. She already had a degree in Kinesiology and was perfectly content with working at the local gym, but her mother had insisted that it was “very unladylike” and that she “wasted her time when she could’ve been a nurse now.” Catherine found herself rolling her eyes again before stepping into the elevator and pressing the button for the third floor. 

Her eyes stared at the ceiling, where a mirrored image of a tired young woman with shaggy brunette hair stared back.

Catherine nearly dropped her forms when she walked into Room 3105. The girl at the hospital entrance who she thought was a teenager, looked not much older than Catherine up close. She looked at the chart at the entrance of the room. 

Name: Adora Nova Grayskull

DOB: 1/19/1995

Today’s Goals: Instructed by doctor to walk around outside for at least 15 minutes.

Notes: CJD

Date: 8/24/2020

Primary Nurse: Scorpia Garnett, RN

Primary Doctor: Luz Hope

Room No.: 3105

This woman is only nine months older than me , Catherine thought to herself, cold settling in her gut. The letters “CJD” stuck out to Catherine. What did they mean? She saw the blonde woman staring at her questioningly, recognition flashing in those dark blue eyes —they looked like galaxies, the intern thought for a moment—, and Catherine morphed her face back to the stoic expression it always had. She opened her mouth to speak, but the woman beat her to it. 

“Hi, I’m Adora,” she greeted, her chirpy voice the opposite of her physical appearance. “Miss Scorpia said I would be expecting someone today. I think I saw you outside. I really like your eyes. Are they contacts? Why are they one yellow and one blue? They’re so cool!”

Now, Catherine did not talk much, so it was natural that she was taken aback by this sudden outburst of words, especially from someone she just met. She blinked slowly, taking time to process Adora’s question. “A-amber, not yellow. And I’m heterochromatic.” 

She cleared her throat as Adora blinked curiously at her, before opening her mouth to speak once again. No sound came out. She cleared her throat before trying again. “Hi Adora, how are you?” 

“I’m as good as someone with CJD could be,” Adora replied, tucking some loose hair behind her left ear. Despite her energy, she looked exhausted. Her hair was limp, her cheeks were slightly sunken, and her arms were frail. For a moment, Catherine forgot that she was in the critical care unit. 

“...CJD?” Catherine hesitantly pressed, not trying to make Adora uncomfortable. The latter didn’t seem to take offense and smiled at Catherine’s questioning eyes. 

“Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease,” Adora explained. “It’s hard to spell. But something about my brain’s messed up, and Light Hope said that my brain cells are ‘deteriorating at an alarming rate’, so I’m kinda just here , you know? My heart’s also really messed up, ha. So I’m eventually going to die.”

Catherine was shocked by how casual Adora was in talking about her condition. Just from the words Adora uttered, she felt her gut clench. Yet, the blonde woman smiled . Smiled as if her cheeks weren’t sunken and death wasn’t waiting for her. And Catherine couldn’t help but respect her.

“Well…” Catherine tried changing the subject to something slightly less depressing. “At least your doctor was honest with you, right?” 

Adora stared at her, immediately understanding Catherine’s intentions. She laughed, something else that startled the intern. “I don’t need sugar-coating. I’m not a child,” she joked in a way that caused Catherine to laugh, the intern startling herself. The sound caught Adora’s attention, and both their laughs grew, to the point where Adora was wheezing. Adora’s nurse, Miss Scorpia, eventually had to come into the room and make sure everything was alright.

As soon as Catherine drove home, she bolted upstairs without even greeting her parents. She shut her bedroom door behind her and swiped her laptop from her desk. She waited for the damned thing to start before going onto Google.

“kroytzfelt yakob disease”, she typed in the search bar. 

“Including results for creutzfeldt jakob disease.

Do you want results only for kroytzfelt yakob disease?”

Catherine clicked on the proper spelling for the name. 4,530,000 results showed up as well as a basic overview on top of the links. 

“Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease

Also known as: CJD

An unusual neurologic disorder that leads to dementia followed by death.

-Extremely rare (Fewer than 1,000 cases per year)

-Treatments can help manage condition, no known cure

-Often requires lab test or imaging

-Can last several years or be lifelong

-Common for ages 60 and older”

The first link under the overview read “Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease - Symptoms and causes - Mayo Clinic”. Catherine clicked it. She read the information the link provided, feeling her heart sink lower and lower. 

“Creutzfeldt-Jakob (KROITS-felt YAH-kobe) disease is a degenerative brain disorder that leads to dementia and, ultimately, death. Symptoms of Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease (CJD) can resemble those of other dementia-like brain disorders, such as Alzheimer's. But Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease usually progresses much more rapidly.

Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease is marked by rapid mental deterioration, usually within a few months. 

Initial signs and symptoms typically include:

-Personality changes

-Depression

-Memory loss

-Impaired thinking

-Difficulty speaking

-Sudden, jerky movements

As the disease progresses, mental symptoms worsen. Most people eventually lapse into a coma. Heart failure, respiratory failure, pneumonia, or other infections are generally the cause of death. Death usually occurs within a year.”

Catherine felt her blood run cold at that last sentence. “Death usually occurs within a year.” She felt the need to throw up and slammed her laptop shut. This woman she met not twelve hours ago was going to die. She hastily put the laptop on her desk and buried herself under her blankets, tears pricking at her eyes. Why the hell was she assigned to a dying person? 

She hated this stars-forsaken internship.

She continued to toss and turn for hours, her parents not checking up on her even once, both swamped with work. Finally, just as the moon was shining brightly in the sky, she was claimed by a fitful sleep. 

Chapter Text

It had been about two weeks since Catherine had started visiting Adora. Catherine had been assigned to a new patient four days ago, but still managed to find the time to visit Adora at the end of her shift. It was as if a giant magnet was drawing her to Room 3105. She even found herself visiting Adora during her off days. Something about Adora’s presence was just so magnetic. 

Her mom and stepdad never questioned Catherine staying at the hospital for hours on end. They relished it, believing that their daughter was finally “shaping up”. She could only be thankful for their oblivion. 

Today was another one of her off days. She didn’t have to turn in any forms to the grumpy lady sitting at the front desk texting her friends and could save herself from rolling her eyeballs out for another day. Today, Catherine was dressed in one of her more casual outfits, just wearing a sweatshirt from her college and some skinny jeans. She trudged over to one of the nearby vending machines in the hallways and fished whatever little cash she had from her back pocket. 

It was as if Catherine’s feet were glued to the floor —the white, pure, disgustingly clean floor— as she punched in the number on the machine to get a bottle of water. Her eyes stared forward, at a pack of nuts on the other side of the glass. The image eventually blurred as Catherine stayed there, unblinking, her hand still outstretched to push one of the buttons. The water bottle had dropped to the bottom of the vending machine at the same time her eyes grew misty.

What’s the point? , she thought to herself. Why am I staying? 

She had been standing there for a bit now. People walked behind her, into the elevators, up the stairs, into the door next to her, but no one took a second glance at her. To them, Catherine was just another nameless person walking the Earth. 

It was almost as if she were invisible. 

Adora’s going to die anyway. 

Eventually, Catherine let her forehead slump against the glass of the vending machine with a dull thump and stared at her Vans. She had driven off to the hospital in a rush earlier, no other motivation than to see Adora again. Her stepdad was more than pleased to see Catherine rush out and didn’t object to her sudden departure. Even her mom quirked up her brow in pleasant surprise.

She’s going to die anyway. So why do I keep coming back? 

Catherine heard two pairs of footsteps approaching, their pace slowing down as they got closer. She was reluctant to look up, wanting to hold her head against the cold glass for a little bit longer. These people could get their snacks later when Catherine was done moping. 

“I didn’t know you were coming today,” Adora’s voice quietly rang out. Catherine stood stiff from her position against the vending machine and turned to Adora. The woman was being held by her mother, the older woman nodding in greeting in Catherine’s direction. 

“Hey-”

“Could you help me back upstairs?” Adora interrupted, before sharing a look with her mother. Catherine wordlessly went to Adora’s side and put the blonde’s arm around her shoulders as the latter let go of her mom. Adora’s mom nodded at Catherine again before heading towards the exit, where a young woman with pink hair was waiting. Adora and Catherine slowly started shuffling towards a nearby elevator. 

“It’s good to see you up and about,” Catherine broke the silence after a moment. She turned her gaze onto Adora, who was desperately trying to mask her labored breaths with a furrowed brow of concentration. Catherine quickly averted her gaze before Adora noticed. 

“Yeah,” Adora quietly wheezed. The journey back to Room 3105 was silent except for the faint ding of the elevator as they reached the third floor. All was quiet as Adora settled back into the hospital bed and Catherine pulled up a chair next to her, facing the door. 

“Can I have your number?” Adora suddenly asked. Catherine jerked her head up in surprise at the spontaneous question as her face heated up. 

This is a bad idea. This is a bad idea, Catherine thought. Her body, however, didn’t listen to her brain. As if on autopilot, she slowly nodded, taking her phone out of her back pocket and handing it to Adora. Adora smiled as she got her phone from under her pillow and handed it to Catherine. The sound of fingertips tapping the screen filled the room for a few, brief seconds. Adora smiled again as the two got their phones back. 

“I love the rain,” Adora said, switching onto another topic as she lay her phone over her stomach. She turned her head to the only window of the room, gazing at the sky longingly. Few clouds littered the light blue sky, the white rays of the sun poking through. Catherine followed her gaze, and looked behind her, out the window, still astounded how her conversations with Adora could go a complete 180°. 

“Why?” Catherine said after a moment of quiet. She couldn’t look at Adora, lest the woman sees the pity in her eyes. In the meantime, her gaze would stay glued to the window until Adora said otherwise. Her neck was starting to hurt a little, though. Damn stiff neck.  

“New life,” Adora said simply. This was one of the few things that came out of her mouth that Catherine understood, only because she associated rain with the same thing.

Though many associated it with sadness and gloom, Catherine and Adora were the few that understood what rain could bring. It brought renewal and change. It meant good luck turning into bad karma, bad karma turning into good luck, and the start of something new. In the vaguest of ways, rain symbolized hope. 

“I like to think,” Adora started, before sniffing quietly. “Rain does a lot for us. It waters crops and flowers and stuff. They’re given another chance at living again.” 

Catherine was silent at Adora’s analysis, realizing that Adora had started crying. Though, she did bring up a good point. With a twist in her gut, the intern immediately knew what direction this conversation would take. She swallowed thickly, silently clenching the fabric of her jeans between her fingers. 

“When I die-” There it was. Catherine felt like throwing up.  

How could Adora be so casual, talking about her inevitable death? Does she not realize that one day, she won’t wake up? That her passing would break her family? “-and get reincarnated or whatever, I’ll have another chance.”

A minute of silence. Catherine didn’t know what to say. 

“Seeing raindrops on the window is nice too. Calming in a way.”

“Yeah,” Catherine agreed, mainly because she had been silent for a while now. She didn’t want Adora to think she was being ignored or scaring the other woman off. In all honesty, Catherine was jealous at Adora’s oblivion to the severity of her condition, even if it was feigned. She stared out the window a bit longer, watching the wispy clouds gradually inch further and further away, until she realized Adora had gone silent. Her heartbeat picked up a bit as she whipped her head around. “Adora?”

Much to her relief, Adora had simply fallen asleep. At the sound of her name, she shifted so that her face was turned towards Catherine. Blonde hair splayed out on the pillow, she was snoring softly, her chest rising and falling with each tiny breath. Catherine took deep breaths to slow her heartbeat, the panic and anxiety and negative thoughts subsiding for now. She blinked rapidly and realized her face had gone numb with fear. 

“Shit, Adora. You scared me…”

Catherine couldn’t help but notice Adora’s arm. It was pathetically frail, not full of muscle and heat and life like hers. There were so many parts of Adora that Catherine knew looked so much different if they were full and healthy and whole . 

Her cheeks were slightly sunken, the opposite of Catherine’s chubby ones. Her hair was limp, not like Catherine’s mane of hair that was wild and glossy and carefree. 

It was funny how she took being healthy for granted. Something that had come to her so easily all 24 years of her life, Adora was constantly fighting for. The guilt was starting to crawl up Catherine’s throat. She had to restrain herself from reaching out and touching the limb. The pathetic, thin, frail limb. 

Stop, Catherine , she thought to herself. It’s not worth it. 

Moving slowly as to not wake Adora, Catherine tiptoed out of Room 3105 and shut the door behind her. As she made the elevator trip down to the ground floor and rushed to the parking lot, she noticed her cheeks were wet with tears. 

Is it worth staying with someone who’s about to leave?

1 New Message. 

From: Adora Grayskull (Sent September 12, 2020, 5:47 PM)

[hi Catherine! Srry I fell asleep and left you hanging]  

From: Catherine Weaver-Prime (Sent 5:47 PM)

[Don't worry, you’re good.]

From: Adora Grayskull (Sent 5:48 PM)

[Will you come back soon?]

From: Catherine Weaver-Prime (Sent 5:49 PM) 

[Of course I will.]

From: Adora Grayskull (Sent 5:49 PM)

[You sound so srs when you text lol. Everything spelled out and periods and everything]

“Catherine! Dinner!” Her mom called. Catherine looked towards her bedroom door and sent a quick goodbye text to Adora. 

From: Catherine Weaver-Prime (Sent 5:50 PM)

[I have to go now. Dinner.] 

From: Adora Grayskull (Sent 5:50 PM)

[ok me too! Talk to you soon :)]

From: Adora Grayskull (Sent 5:57 PM)

[thank you for being my friend :D]