Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“You ready for school, kiddo?”

You waved a hand over your shoulder, mouth full of the apple you swiped from the kitchen counter. Your dad sat at the breakfast table, sipping some coffee while he read the paper. It was just the two of you now after you moved back to town.

He gave you another smile, waving a hand back, “I’ll be at work when you get home, so call me when you’re back.”

“Bye, dad!”

You ran to your car, throwing your bag haphazardly into the front seat. It felt so good to be back, back home, back at your old school, old friends, even this old car you couldn’t take with you.

The past few years were rough, and that’s an understatement at best.

Spending all your time moving around the country to bigger and more expensive hospitals. All for your mom to get better treatment, you finally settled on homeschooling when she got too sick to move. Promising her youd finish out where you’d started, you choked up a little at the memory.

Telling her you would, and the next month you were back.

You barely had time to tell everyone where you’d been, and not everyone responded to your messages… especially Ben.

To be fair, it had been three years since you spoke.

The last time was in your driveway, he was hunched forward and staring at the pavement. Saying nothing when you told him you weren’t coming back to school, he just fiddled with his shirt while you cried.

His older brother, Kylo, pulled up just as he moved to speak. Laying on the horn of his black Camaro while he yelled, “Come on, weirdo! You can see your girlfriend tomorrow!”

You cringed at that memory, how you burst into tears once Kylo said it. It wasn’t his fault, he didn’t know you were leaving. Ben had found out after walking you home from school, but you couldn’t speak through your tears. Hearing Ben mumble out a goodbye, before shuffling over to his brother’s car.

Soon, your daydreaming brought you mindlessly to the school parking lot. It was right after Winter break, you came for the last semester. Wrapping yourself in your warm, maroon coat and tugging your backpack over your shoulder. You smiled at some of your old friends, walking to the front of the school.

Oh, the memories.

All the times you and Ben walked around from class to class, holding hands and avoiding the seniors. Giving each other small pecks on the cheeks, smiling at the blush of red that bloomed on his cheeks when you did. It was crazy to be back, walking the same hallways. Surrounded by your friends, listening to them jabber on and on about how much you missed.

How much they missed you.

You were elated, everything was the same.

The old lockers were still a dark blue, covered in scratches and dents from years of abuse. The hallways smelled when you passed the gym, freshmen were hiding around the corners from their older bullies. You waved at the same SRO who walked around to help kids get back to their homerooms.

Thankfully, your first class of the day was filled with friendly faces. You all had changed a bit, Rey was taller and slimmer, Rose had some cute glasses and no more braces, Poe’s hair curled like Clark Kents, and Poe was still in his old leather jacket. You let out a sigh of relief, grinning at them all.

Last weekend, they all came to help you move back in. Crying and hugging, mourning over the lost time together, but they talked to you while you were away. Facetime, and phone calls, group texts, and some Zoom meetings were shared for the past three years.

You settled into your seat, letting your bag sling to the floor before unzipping it. Grabbing out a notebook and binder, ever the organized student. You found peace in the control you had with scheduling, with all the abrupt changes in your life, it was nice to have this one thing.

Your teacher came into class, a tall pinkish-blonde woman, she looked like Kylos’ friend Phasma from what you could remember of her. You were never close with Ben’s older brother, he scared you both, avoiding him and his large friends whenever you came to the Solo household. She cleared her throat, all eyes settling on her, “Good morning everyone, I hope you all had a good break and are ready to finish out your senior year.”

Everyone hollered at that, ready was an understatement. People wanted to get on with their lives, head out in the world and make it their own. You were certainly ready for some control, move off on your own to explore and learn from people you’ve never met.

“As you all know, I’m Mrs. Holdo, and-”

The door to the class flew open, all eyes moving to the culprit.

You couldn’t believe your eyes, because there stood Ben.

He didn’t look like the Ben you remembered, he didn’t have short hair that barely covered his large ears. Or lanky arms that hung past his equally lanky torso, this kid didn’t even have his glasses!

Mrs. Holdo sighed deeply, moving her attention from the intruder to the class, “Mr. Solo, it’s the first day and you’re already late…” she shook her head, “I’ll give you a warning today, but you know I don’t tolerate this behavior.”

You expected him to cower, apologize profusely over bungling her monologuing. He was always a straight-A student when you were younger, always trying to separate himself from the sour reputation of his troublemaking father and brother. He strived to be like Leia, who was the town’s most upstanding citizen. She was mayor for a few years, you noticed her re-election signs on the drive in a few weeks back.

Ben gave her a lazy smile, shrugging his shoulders before strolling to the back of the classroom. You listened to him slumping down in a seat, leaning on the hard plastic as it creaked under his humongous form. “Sorry-car wouldn’t start,” he mused, voice sounding nothing like the former.

Mrs. Holdo rolled her eyes, moving on from his interruption to begin class. You tried to stay focused, giving ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when papers were handed out. Reading the syllabus and mapping out study times with your friends, all while ignoring the feeling of eyes on the back of your head.

Class emptied after the bell rang, you scuffled out with Rey and Rose, arms linked. They were yammering on and on about the parties this weekend, and how they were so excited for you to come and be back with the gang. You nodded silently, watching from the corner of your eye as Ben squeezed past your group, giving you a side-eye and a half smile as he jogged towards different people.

You kept your voice low as you passed, “Why is Ben with those guys?”

Rey looked over her shoulder, your pace pulling you away from his shrinking form. You heard him laughing with the group, shoulders shaking from the joke. The sound so foreign to your ears, “Ben hasn’t been around us for a long time,” she made eye contact with you again, “He’s been doing his own thing.”

——-

The rest of your day was normal, brief intermissions from Ben popping up in weird places. Staring at you like he forgot who you were, all you could do was offer a half-hearted smile and hope he would remember. It’s not like you guys weren’t close, he was your best friend since you were ten!

He should at least recognize your voice, but no.

Every time he came near you, he gave a weird look and would move on. Tugging his backpack over his shoulder and walking with his weird friends. None of them you knew, some of them with extremely long hair, gauges, one had an eyebrow ring, and they all smelled like weed and cigarettes.

Not the people you remembered Ben liking.

And they all had skateboards, outside at lunch you noticed the group surrounding his Chevy Camaro, Kylo’s old car. Laughing and skating in the parking lot. You marveled at the change, his black hair long and tucked under a green beanie. Skinny jeans making his legs look impossibly long, and a sweatshirt that made him look like he stepped out of a Thrasher magazine.

You and your friends loitered in the parking lot after school, laughing and smiling about the rest of the semester and how you’d all get through it together. When you all grew silent at the sound of a car idling behind you, just by the sound you knew who it was.

This is why it confused you when you turned around and you felt like your heart climbed into your throat. Constricting around it while you tried to breathe, Ben was right in front of you, one of his arms hanging out the window while his other hand was drumming on the steering wheel.

He looked you up and down, making you blush from being self-conscious. You looked down at your feet, similar to the last time you were near one another. Ben cleared his throat, drawing your attention back at his face.

The same face, still littered with freckles and moles, dimple lines embedded in his skin. You noticed faint stubble, something he never had when growing up. You licked your lips softly when your eyes landed on his own, remembering how much you liked to kiss them. How they would turn a shade of pink when you’d nibble on them.

How slick and shiny they were the first time you guys were together, when you gave your bodies to each other.

Ben smirked at you, tapping his knuckles to the outside of his car, “Nice to see you again.”

“Yeah,” your throat clicked, briefly glancing in his car. Seeing a blonde guy in the front seat, lighting a cigarette with a cupped palm. Your nose crinkled as the smell wafted towards the open window, the guy passed the stick to the backseat where two girls were giggling. Taking greedy gulps of the poison before handing it off once more.

“Well,” Ben’s voice pulled your focus back to him, “See ya around.”

You waved a lame hand as he drove off, whimpering out a pitiful goodbye that couldn’t be heard over the roar of the engine. Watching as he tore off down the road, laughter and squealing pouring into the cool January air.

Yeah, great to be home.

——-

Chapter Text

“Shush!” you hissed between laughter, pressing a finger to your lips while Ben pinned his body to his bedroom door. 

Footsteps echoed down the hall, his brother was home. Forcing you both to be quiet, but was so hard. Being around each other made you so excited, eager to share in the experiences you’d only receive once in a lifetime. 

“Ben?” Kylos voice boomed from the end of the Solos hallway, “You home?” 

Ben held his breath, eyes wide as he motioned for you to be quieter. You both listened to the sounds of the stairs creaking, Kylo was leaving. 

Thank god. 

Once the garage door opened, you let out a squeal of excitement. It wasn’t often you both successfully hid from him, he had the nose of a bloodhound. Notorious for interrupting your alone time, even though Ben had covered for him thousands of times before. 

You kept giggling as Ben leaned off the door, running a hand through his short hair. Letting out a laugh of relief before wrapping his arms around your heaving shoulders. Maneuvering you both to his messy bed, blue sheets were torn all over from when he woke up this morning before school. Pillows were strewn across the floor, you tripped on one as he pushed you face first. 

Bouncing on the soft mattress, you took a deep breath, smelling Ben’s unmistakable scent. Something you got to bask in every day, just being together. He fell on the bed next to you, his long limbs caging your body as he rolled on top. Pinning you to the mattress, back to his chest while you pretended to struggle. 

“Don’t make me tie you up,” Ben huffed, digging his fingers into your sensitive sides, pulling a squeal of laughter. The bastard knew you were ticklish, exploiting the knowledge whenever he could. You wiggled around, managing to spin so you were facing one another. 

You brushed a lock of Ben’s hair behind his ear, it was growing longer than you liked it. He always tried to hide with it, but you loved seeing his ears, especially when they would burn red when he was embarrassed. 

Your lips crashed together, teeth clashing in an attempt to get closer. You wrapped your arms around his neck, your sweater hanging halfway off your shoulders and bunching at the elbows. Ben’s hands fumbled with your shirt, rubbing you through the fabric as he had in the past. When you both were getting used to one another, you mewled into his touch. Forcing his big hands to cup your breasts, skipping over the soft cups through your t-shirt. 

“Please,” you panted into his mouth, he nodded at your desperation. One of his hands leaving your chest to wrap around your back, keeping you flush with him as another quested under the hem. His fingers scorching hot against your skin, moving to cup your bra. Soft fabric skimming under his pushing and pulling. 

You both took a shaky breath when he touched the skin there, slipping under to grasp your breast. The pillowy skin rolling under his firm grip, “So soft,” he groaned, lips moving to press against your cheek. Traveling to your earlobe, nibbling at the flesh as he rolled his palm. You sighed into the touch, instincts telling you to hitch a leg over his hip, feeling his muscles flex as he ground against you. 

Soon, the two of you were sitting upright in his bed, clothes pulled off haphazardly. Grinding in each other’s laps, one of Ben’s arms was slung behind you. Palm at the small of your back, keeping you upright while he mouthed at your neck. Making you squirm and writhe in his hold, fisting at his t-shirt that was half off. 

Pants abandoned on the floor, boxers leaving nothing to the imagination. Your skirt was pushed up to pool around your hips. Panties tugged to the side by his other hand. Digging into your folds and fumbling for your entrance. The tips of his fingers curling against you as you rolled your hips. 

“Ben-I,” you whispered, head falling back in pleasure. You could stay like this for hours, being touched by him. It was never enough for you, warmth pooling in your belly whenever Ben was near. His fingers barely scratched the itch that laid just under your skin, “More, please.” 

He nodded, pulling his hand from between your legs, “Shhh, one sec.” 

Ben kissed at your temple, despite your whining. Glancing down as he slipped his slickened digits under the waistband of his boxers. Groaning as he touched himself, you mirrored the sound. Moving your own desperate hands to help him, wanting to hold him as he held you. 

“I stole a condom,” Ben panted, breath hitching as you wrapped a hand around his length. Eyes shutting as he moaned from a gentle tug you gave him, “From Kylo’s room.” 

“Okay,” you whispered, not wanting to sound overeager one way or another. 

A hand flew to his bedside drawer, tugging out junk before pulling out a golden wrapper. Holding it like it was a hundred-dollar bill, poised between his thumb and forefinger. Still shiny from your excitement, he nuzzled your face with his own. Kissing at the corner of your mouth before leaning against his headboard. 

Staring at you with his big hazel eyes, searching for you to say something. He pulled his t-shirt off, revealing his pale chest to your waiting hands. Moving to tug on your own, you willingly let him strip you. His eyes grew wide at your bare breasts seeing the light of day, licking his lips absentmindedly before devouring you. 

Before you knew it, you were pinned to his bed, legs wide and panting. 

Still dressed in your skirt and panties, while his boxers were pulled to his knees. Giving him little range of motion, thrusting shallowly into your heat. Both of you tried to be quiet, but the touch was so good. Messy, clumsy, and wet, the room filled with the slaps of skin. 

Echoing off his walls that were clad with posters and pictures, around his desk that was littered with his homework and laptop. Closet door was thrown open, unable to shut because of a clothes pile he left on the floor. 

All you felt was him, and that's all you ever needed. 

-------

You shot out of bed, slicked with sweat and panting. 

Covers pooling off your shoulders and down to your waist, your sleep shirt clung to your skin, kicking off in an attempt to feel less closed in. You glanced to your right, seeing the red digits on your alarm clock. 

3:27 AM. 

“Fucking-fuck,” you hissed. Fisting the sheets with one hand while biting the other. This was the second week in a row you’d had that dream. The dream that recounted the day you and Ben first fucked, losing your virginity to one another. You had blocked out the memory after leaving, too sad to think of anything else. 

But now, it was back, and in full force. 

Memories of Ben and you fumbling with one another. Kissing and crying out in the throes of pleasure, awkward and strained from the effort to be the best. You remember whining when it first happened, and Ben thought he hurt you and apologized for ten minutes afterward. Even though you assured him, it was fine. 

You slid a hand down your face, trying to catch your breath. Why were you still thinking about that? It’s not like it was the only time you’d fucked someone… you weren’t a homebody while you were away. Having a healthy, totally normal, sexual experience like any other teenager. 

There shouldn’t be anything to remember from that moment. 

And yet, every time you shut your eyes, you saw him. 

Panting above you, lips trying to kiss all over your face. Brows scrunching up as he came with a sharp gasp, cock twitching as he spilled into a condom, or that one time he pulled out and came on your belly… 

“Jesus,” you tore out of bed, hugging yourself as you worked through the memory. Nothing was happening, nothing to see there, just old memories that had zero business being brought up. It’s not like you and Ben had talked since you came back, aside from him saying hi on the first day. 

He’d avoided you since then, only smiling if he was forced to make eye contact. Once he gave you a sheepish wave when you scowled at him while smoking in the parking lot, that was not the Ben Solo you knew. 

Ben Solo was a good boy, a crowd-pleaser. Desperate for praise and appreciation, that's why he was so perfect for you. A couple of teachers’ pets, you strived to be the best for one another. But this one was the opposite, didn’t take notes during class, smoked, hung out with people who were a part of the ‘ outside crowd’ . 

Wasn’t a menace like his brother, you looked extensively at the local arrest records to see if he followed after him. Thankfully, the only Solo who showed up was Kylo, complete with his mugshot for when he was arrested for breaking and entering that one summer. 

You paced your room in thought, should you tell Rey and Rose about your dreams? They would talk you through it, it was perfectly natural to have wet dreams from time to time. You weren’t a prude, okay? But to have the same one, over and over and over…

Settling back on your bed you pulled out your phone, scrolling through social media mindlessly until you found yourself stalking Ben’s Instagram. 

Filled with videos and pictures of him and his friends skateboarding, yelling, giving each other tattoos, some grainy video of him taking a massive bong rip. Yeesh, hopefully, his parents don’t know about this. 

A few pictures surrounded by the weird girls you see loitering with him, his arms slung around their waists as they smile for the camera. 

Lots of ironic shit, silly captions, none of it made you think of Ben. 

You let out a long sigh, pulling up your text messages to see if anyone was awake. You didn’t feel like falling back asleep and having an encore, would be too much to handle before heading to school tomorrow. 

At the top of your messages, there was a filter, showing you had a message from an unknown number. Sent today, at 1:05 AM… 

Unknown Number: 

Hey. 

You: 

Hello? 

You stared at the screen, half expecting it to turn black from waiting, but three dots appeared seconds after you hit send. 

Unknown Number: 

Why are you awake rn? 

“What the?” 

You:

You’re awake too?

Unknown Number: 

Yeah, well I was checking up on you. 

Should be asleep rn, not healthy to be up this late. 

You groaned at the screen, whoever the hell this was needed to fuck off. You began typing furiously at the sender, ripping them a new one with curse words you only whipped out when appropriate… 

Unknown Number: 

Why didn’t you call me to tell me you were back? 

I know we aren’t like super close, just felt weird seeing you again. 

Without knowing, of course. 

Not that seeing you is weird. 

You: 

Do I know you ?

The sender began typing, the three dots appearing and disappearing multiple times before they finally stopped. You laid in bed, staring at the screen while your eyes burned from the brightness. They didn’t seem to have a response, which is better for you. You set your phone back down, curling onto your side to face your wall, chewing your bottom lip while you waited for sleep to lull you back into your wounded memories. 

Unknown Number: 

Ben. 

Unknown Number:

Sorry-I must have the wrong number. 

Gn, sorry again. 

-------

“Stop that,” Rey hissed at you, smacking your wrist. 

“Sorry,” you mumbled, wrangling your arm from her grasp to continue chewing on your nail beds. You already started, there was no stopping you now. Full of nervous energy from your horrible, wonderful, and monotonous dreams; and the messages from Ben… 

Of course, you fell asleep. Given an encore performance of the two of you making out like the needy teens you were. Now you were seated anxiously in homeroom, watching the door for Ben to slink in. Reeking of cigarettes and stale weed, probably from his morning bong rip. 

Yes, you knew he did that because it was posted on his Snapchat that you cleverly added at 5 AM when you woke up and needed to distract yourself from the throbbing in your core from the delicious dream. 

He strolled in, just like you thought, giving a weak smile to everyone before greeting his friends. High fiving and laughing like a crazy person, jeez , why does he not hide it? Can’t he get arrested for drug use? Does he not care anymore? 

Kylo never fucked around with drugs… as far as you knew… 

Again, he was too terrifying to follow around to find out, maybe you’d check into his social media to see if he was a prisoner or finally got his shit together. 

“Hey,” a low voice rang over your shoulder, followed by a finger tugging on your sweater sleeve. 

You glanced back, Ben was so close to you. Smelling the stale air around him, some hints of cologne he probably bathed his beanie in. Whatever he uses in his hair now that it's so long, it smelled heavenly. You fought the urge to run your fingers through the long length that hid his wonderful ears, desperate to taste the flesh like you used to. 

“You good?” 

“Oh,” you shook yourself from that thought bubble, giving him a soft smile, “I’m fine, how are you?” 

Ben’s finger trailed along your sleeve, slipping between the wide lavender knots that littered the fabric. You shivered when his skin touched your own, just as warm as you remember, Ben watched intently as he traced the digit. Rubbing soft circles before humming, “Cool-cool, I’m good, too.” 

You stayed quiet, watching as he continued touching you. Not that you didn’t like it, but this was the closest you’d been near each other since you were fourteen. And he was still touching you like it was a habit he couldn’t break. 

Next to you, Rey cleared her throat. 

“Why are you touching her, Ben?” 

“Hm?” he turned his head lazily to his left, blinking out of a daze he was in before coughing and leaning away. “Sorry, wasn’t doing anything wrong.” 

Rey narrowed her eyes, looking between the two of you. You gave a soft shrug, wishing you told her about your dreams so she would lay off. This was probably the closest you’d get to touching again and she was ruining it! 

Ben stared back, mouth in a smug grin. Fuck, he was so handsome now. He was before, but now he was a man; big, tall, broad, the sweatshirt he wore could barely contain his biceps. 

Again, not that you were looking. 

With a drum of his fingers against your chair, he walked back to his seat. Swinging his long legs over the too-small chair and desk and turning his attention back to his groupies. 

The rest of your day was full of awkward moments, where Ben stared at you. Big hazel eyes blinking slowly, traveling up and down your figure. The first time you noticed it, you ignored the feeling, assuming that he was staring at something behind you. 

But no, he was blatantly checking you out, following up with a wave. 

During your last class, you received a text. 

Unknown Number (Maybe Ben): 

What are you doing after school?

You chewed the inside of your cheek, looking around at your group of friends. Laughing and joking with one another, Rose was chatting about a party happening this weekend. Apparently, everyone was going to be there. Poe and Finn were in charge of scoring drinks, and Rey was letting everyone crash at her place after. 

“You’re going to the party, right?” Poe smiled across from you, gesturing to everyone else's attitude on the subject. 

You scratched your cheek, thinking about lying to your dad made you feel queasy. He trusted you so much, especially after mom got sick and it was just the two of you. But you also wanted to fit in again, after bouncing around from school to school. 

Your party experiences were slim to none.

“Yeah,” you sighed, a smile breaking through your haze of guilt, “I’ll be there…” 

Unknown Number (Maybe Ben): 

We could hang out-or whatever. I’m going to the skatepark with some friends and you 

could tag along. Since it’s been a while. 

You: 

Oh, sure? I didn’t realize you skated that much.

Unknown Number (Maybe Ben): 

Not everyone stays the same 🤷

You: 

I guess send me the address.

------

So, this was not what you were picturing when he said skate park. 

You imagined a concrete park, with benches and grass everywhere. Maybe a couple of kids playing on a playground nearby? To emphasize the ‘ park’ element. 

Instead, you pulled up to a junkyard of sorts? 

Lots of loud music, not metal or screamo that Kylo played in his car when he was your chaperone years ago. Instead, it was indie-whiny-shrill voices talking about cigarettes and flowers and how ‘ no one loves them like drugs do’. 

Fuckin’ weird. 

There were cement pipes laid out along the grounds, with blows where other people were performing jump tricks. The sound of metal grinding against long pipes shrieked over the loud bass from a nearby stereo. A couple of tables were scattered nearby that inhabited other girls who were invited over. 

All of them were different, still beautiful, but nothing like you. 

Piercings, crazy haircuts, one of them sported a shaved head. 

Lots of cheap tattoos, probably done by themselves. Tattered crop tops and converse shoes, you looked down at your own outfit. You didn’t bother to change after school; still in your lavender cozy sweater and some black skinny jeans. Paired with some laced booties, you didn’t look anything like the rest of them. 

Not even a tear around the ankles of your jeans! 

You stayed in the car for as long as possible, parked away from everyone else in case you decided to bail. Why did Ben invite you? Just because he touched you this morning didn’t mean that you two were an item. The sound of a skateboard crossing the pavement pulled your attention away from fiddling with your shirt, glancing to the left to spy on the man in question. 

No more beanie, just his hair swept to the side. Bangs covering half his forehead and sticking up where the hair would’ve housed his ears, just in a gray t-shirt and denim jeans. Clad with huge rips a long his knees and some Vans slip-ons . 

He walked up to your car door, opening it just enough to wedge his body between the side and his hips. Your eyes barely coming up to his hips from the sitting position, you had to stare upwards to not look directly at his junk. 

“You gonna come out? Or just sit here the whole time?” 

You cringed for a moment, wanting to seem cool and not at all intimidated by his newfound group, angling out of the car. Ben barely moved to make room, leaving you awkwardly pressed against his front. Hands raised in the air in an attempt to not give unwanted contact. 

Ben chuckled at that, smiling smugly at your fear-stricken face. You stiffened more when one arm slung around your waist, notching him against you. “I really like your sweater,” his voice was barely a whisper, sweeping across your temples. 

“ Thank you ,” you replied meekly, arms and legs threatening to turn into jelly. Who is this man? And what did he do with Ben Solo? Ben used to be terrified of touching you in public, afraid of calling unwanted attention, and now he was coiling around you like you were about to disappear again. 

He led you to his car, telling you it was okay to sit on the hood if you didn’t want to say hi to the other girls in his group. Letting you know that he will be moving around, getting videos of tricks and some other words that weren’t in your personal dictionary. From your perch, you studied them all. Watching their movements, and mannerisms, that way you could try to understand the appeal of this lifestyle. 

Being ‘cool’ wasn’t really, your thing per se. 

You were responsible, smart, honest, and caring. 

Not that they weren’t, but judging by the pipes being passed around down in the pit, their priorities lie elsewhere. 

Ben finished after a grueling hour of watching him yell, laugh, fall, and smoke from the top of the hill. Waltzing back to his car while lighting a cigarette, much to your disgust. Trying to hide your nose scrunching up as he drew closer. 

Slumping against the hood to your right, skateboard propped up against his thigh as he inhaled. Smoke pluming from his pursed lips, waving mindlessly at his friends who were leaving, yelling at Benji for ditching them. 

“Want one?” he held the cigarette towards you, pinched between his large fingers. 

You swallowed harshly, giving a small shake, “No-thank you.” 

He shrugged, mumbling between another breath, “There's no reason to be stuck up around me, it's not gonna hurt you.” 

Um, yes it will. There are dozens of studies out about the effects of tobacco and links to lung, mouth, and tongue cancer. 

“I’m fine-just not in the mood right now.” 

“Oh,” he nodded slowly, “You only smoke when you drink? A couple of my friends do that too.” 

Nope-not at all what you were saying, but he wasn’t looking at you like you were lame so you could roll with it. I mean-what were the odds of you getting drunk near him? 

“Going to the party this weekend? I know Rey and Rose are supposed to be going,” he turned his head to face you, blowing out the corner of his mouth, “Haven’t seen you at any this semester.” 

Shit. 

“Yeah-yup,” you stammered, focusing a little too long on his lips smacking, “I’ll be there.” 

“Cool.” 

Silence. 

And then, you were suddenly in the backseat of his car. Letting Bens smoke laced breath mingle with your own, lips sucking against the column of your neck. Rough hands brushing your hair back so he had more access while you writhed in his lap. 

Moaning and panting at the pressure already coiling in your center, with each grind of his knee wedged between your thighs. Ben’s right hand latched to the back of your neck, fisting your hair to yank you back and reveal more. While his left slipped under your sweater, skimming your bare skin along your tummy. 

Momentarily playing with your belly ring before dipping a finger to the waistband of your jeans. Jolting against the leather at the sensation, was he about to finger you? You’d always wanted to be finger fucked in this car, but was now the right time? 

Ben seemed to think so, popping the top button open and shoving his hand down your pants. Bulging from the stretch of him down there, against your bare folds. He groaned against your neck, licking a long line from collarbone to your ear. Closing his teeth around the lobe before dipping his middle finger inside you. 

“Shit,” he panted, worming the digit deeper, walls already clenching sporadically around him from the tsunami of your release. “You are so wet already, think I can fit another in there?” 

You nodded numbly, Ben whined with you. Mirroring your excitement before both of you paused to look between your legs. Shaking from the tension as he shoved another finger inside. You yelped as it popped, even with the shield of your jeans on the squelch of your desire couldn’t be covered up. 

Ben jammed them in and out in shallow thrusts. His wrist trapped in your garments, Ben did the best he could. Tips brushing against your front wall over and over, making you twitch at each pass. 

“ Ben-I,” you sobbed wetly, tears clumping your mascara, “ I need to cum.” 

“Fuck yes, cum baby. Cum all over my hand.” 

Your lips crashed together, right as you climaxed. Inhaling the bitter taste of tobacco and weed, maybe whatever sports drink he had earlier. Some hints of gum, all pooling on your tongue as you sucked on his for dear life. 

Bucking your hips frantically as you came down, still stuffed by his meaty fingers. Ben’s mouth worked against you, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth before snapping away. Withdrawing his soaked digits from your jeans, panties askew from his fingering. You blushed at the sight, creamy slick ringing around his skin. The smell of your fresh arousal coating the air between your both. 

Ben smacked his lips, drawing the fingers to his mouth before moaning lewdly. Eyes shutting in quick bliss as he cleaned them of your essence. You stared with eyes wide open, unable to shake yourself from the image of a string of spit connecting them to his kiss-bitten lips. 

“ Delicious .” 

You stayed still for a few moments, waiting to see if something else would happen. But Ben didn’t move to take your clothes off or bring your hand to jerk his obviously tented erection to cum all over the old leather. He just smiled at you, dopey as ever, like he didn’t just finger you into the ninth dimension for the first time in three years. 

“So,” Ben looked around the small cab, scratching the back of his neck, “Do you want me to grab a certain brand for this weekend, or?” 

“What?” 

He looked at you confused, “Brand? Like do you have a favorite brand of smokes or are you just like a freeloader?” 

Oh. 

Without thinking, you blurted out the only thing you remember from gas stations. The only pack that was eye level and very colorful… 

“American Spirits?” 

Ben clapped a hand on your knee, chuckling to himself, “My kind of woman.”

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

Ben Solo: 

You up? 

thanks for the tit pic btw, it was really hot. 

Ben Solo: 

Cool cool. 

Wanna go for a drive?