Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Chronos meandered through the dead realm he'd been calling his home for a little while. There wasn't much to do here so often he chose to explore, even though nothing ever changed. He was still known as the "new one" to the other Shinigamis. He'd been assured early on that because their kind lived virtually forever, it would be quite a long time before he lost that moniker. 

Chronos didn't remember anything before awakening in the dead realm. Evidently, none of them did. 

Chronos was the only one who seemed to care. None of the other Shinigami cared about what they had been before or if they had been at all. In truth, they seemed not to care about much of anything, even if it was finding meaning in existence. Chronos was still a large point of curiosity for most of them it wasn’t every millennium that a new Shinigami was born - but the average Shinigami’s life was still perpetual boredom. It was only accentuated by the conversations they had amongst themselves and...gambling. Just gambling. 

At least, Chronos thought to himself, Shinigami make excellent company. And they did. Chronos found his fellow death gods to be both affable and friendly. Except for some good-natured teasing, they’d been exceedingly helpful to Chronos when he’d first appeared and there seemed to be a quiet understanding amongst all of them. 

Perhaps it was because he was so much younger, but even as he shared in his fellow’s boredom, Chronos seemed to find more meaning in his existence than the others did. It wasn’t easy, living in their dead realm, but where there was a will, there was a way! 

He explored every inch of their realm in the way only a new being could. He talked with the others, discussing all manner of things he could think of, which became the thing that alerted the other Shinigamis - and him - to the fact that he had exceptionally high intelligence, even among his own kind. Only Nu was able to keep him on his toes during a discussion. 

And then there was the majority of his time which he began to spend in front of the portal to the human realm. People-watching became his new favorite hobby. That was how he met Ryuk, the Shinigami that he quickly learned was even more of an oddball amongst their kind than he was. 

Early on in his attempts to hold back the tedium of Shinigami life, Chronos had heard stories about this Shinigami, Ryuk, who left for the human realm once not long ago with his and another Shinigami’s Death Note to assuage his own boredom. He’d come back to their realm, his fun over, shortly before Chronos had been born, but evidently, he did have quite a bit of fun while he was gone. 

Their realm, although dying, was quite large and the combination of Chronos often doing things and Ryuk seemingly keeping to himself more often than not, led to Chronos only meeting this infamous Shinigami for the first time as they both stood over the portal. Watching the humans. 

One human, in particular, Chronos felt drawn to and he watched them religiously, seldom going a day without seeing them. 

~ 🅚 ~

Chronos decided to crawl back to the portal where he often viewed the same young man. A boy, really, in human terms. He was so terribly young among his kind and yet he shouldered massive responsibilities like they were nothing and with not a word of complaint. 

Maybe he even enjoyed it, Chronos couldn't be sure. 

Regardless, Chronos felt for him. He felt for him in a way he didn't for any other human. He felt an odd... responsibility ...towards him. Poor boy. 

Guilt? Is that what Chronos really felt? Guilt for what, he wondered? 

Ryuk perched on a rocky outcropping somewhere behind Chronos, as he so often did. Whether he did this because of how interesting he found humans or because he was just following him, Chronos also didn't know. After they’d talked a bit over the human realm, he and Ryuk had simply clicked and begun spending most of their time together. 

“Looking at that human again?” Ryuk called amusement hovering clearly within his voice, as always. 

“Of course,” Chronos responded casually, not taking his eyes off of the frail-looking boy laying spread out on the floor of his abode. Was it a home? It looked more like a human office than a home, but he did sleep there…

“Why do I care about this child so much?” Chronos whispered to himself. 

“Beats me.” Ryuk evidently heard him. For some strange reason though, Ryuk kinda sounded to him like he did know. Like he was privy to some substantial information that Chronos didn’t know. He didn’t ask. “Why you care for any human is beyond me.” Ryuk continued, uncaringly. 

Chronos watched as the white-haired human calmly twirled his long hair with one finger, as he was in the habit of doing. The hair had been somewhat short - perhaps a bit long for his gender - when Chronos he’d first taken to watching him, but since then, the human had allowed it to grow unimpeded until it ran down to his lower back. 

How peculiar. How different. Maybe that was why Chronos watched him so much? But then why the vague feeling of guilt in his gut as he watched the small human live his life? Regardless, Chronos had learned a great deal about human culture from watching him and other humans. From his observations, the Shinigami learned that the young man was a detective and apparently was one of great renown. Strangely, the boy didn’t show much emotion ever, despite his great success in life, which was something that made Chronos sad for him. He didn’t seem to enjoy existence and just went about the motions, unlike Chronos who mostly succeeded in finding happiness. It was tragically ironic, he thought, given the respective worlds they inhabited. 

“Hyuk!” Ryuk gave that distinctive laugh of his. “Hey, L﹘Chronos, why don’t we go for a fly? I can tell ya’ more stories while we do!” The other Shinigami tried to bribe him, but despite how much Chronos enjoyed the act of flying, he remained unmoved. 

“Not now, Ryuk. I’m watching Nate.” Chronos murmured. 

“That’s not the name he goes by, is it?” Ryuk asked, as if he didn’t already know, and slid down from the tall rock to stand beside him. 

“No, he goes by the strange nickname ‘Near’ , but Nate River is his name, no matter what he may desire it to be.” Chronos returned, readily. Although he had been trying to ignore it this whole time, his red pupils dragged themselves up to the negative space above the young human’s head. Ryuk saw this. 

“He doesn’t have much time left, does he?” Ryuk commented. 

There was a short, weighty silence. “No, he doesn’t,” Chronos said, at last. 10668 was floating in red above the boy’s head; three human days left in his lifespan. Just three human days. “It doesn’t seem fair.” Chronos found himself whispering, almost unconsciously. 

Ryuk looked at him with curiosity and no small amount of surprise as Chronos continued. “He’s so young among humans and he does so much for his world. Yet, he’s barely begun to live his life, at all. He needs more time…” Chronos drew off. His thinking was reaching truly uncomfortable territory now. 

There was nothing he could do, after all. It was forbidden to use their Death Notes to extend a human’s life - Chronos didn’t even know how Nate was going to die - and Ryuk had even told him the secret about how to kill a Shinigami! He couldn’t…

He could do nothing to help.

“Hey!” Ryuk started suddenly, causing Chronos to jump a little as he was wrenched quickly from his depressing thoughts. “This is getting sad, how ‘bout we write some names down? I bet it’ll get your spirits up!” 

Chronos looked at the other Shinigami - his friend - before slowly turning to stare at Nate for a few long moments. Then he sighed lightly and turned back to his friend to give Ryuk a tired smile. “Sure, Ryuk, sounds fun.” 

Chronos reached out languidly with a long, slender finger and touched the surface of the portal. Like a mirror covered in water, it rippled and its appearance changed, reacting to the young Shinigami’s will. In Nate’s place, appeared several mafia members, having some kind of meeting in their lair. 

Ryuk chuckled. “You know, at first I didn’t see why you particularly cared about what humans you killed; whether they were innocent or not. Why bother killing criminals as if that was going to solve the world’s problems? I still don’t get it completely, but I will admit there is definitely more fun to killing criminals.” 

Chronos couldn’t remember having that conversation. Oh well, it wasn’t like he could expect Ryuk to always tell him what he was thinking at the moment. “It won’t solve the human world’s problems, Ryuk, but it may make it a better place.” 

“Humans scurry around like little ants, lying and stealing and that won’t change. You’re young, but you’ve been watching humans enough to know that. Humans have all sorts of laws, rules, and professions meant to control the chaos they create, for all the good that’s done them. You’re always the optimist, aren’t you?” Ryuk said. 

Chronos scoffed lightly. “We don’t know it won’t help. We can’t see the future, after all, Ryuk. Besides, when killing career criminals, it is nearly impossible not to do at least some little good. Maybe a little is enough.” His voice sounded wistful at the end a small, barely there, a smile tugged at his lips. 

Ryuk didn’t seem to quite agree, but he gave a smile of his own to accompany it, anyway. “Well, at any rate, it provides some good entertainment. Although it would be more interesting if you had them all die of heart attacks instead of writing their deaths as accidents.” Ryuk said, peering curiously into the portal as Chronos began writing down the names of all the men in the lair. 

“Why is that?” Chronos asked, mildly. For some reason, when Chronos had been told that he’d need to kill humans to lengthen his own life and gotten started on that, he’d been reticent to have even one of them expire due to heart attack, so he’d ended up making them all look like accidents. Of course, he was careful never to kill one as they were in the act of killing someone else, lest he accidentally extend a human’s life and off himself by accident. 

Ryuk chuckled. “I bet they’d panic if a bunch of criminals started dying of heart attacks.” There was that sound of knowing in his voice again. 

Chronos sighed but didn’t ask again. Sometimes Ryuk liked to keep things to himself for entertainment purposes, Chronos could let his friend have that. Chronos snapped his book shut and hooked it onto his belt, on the same side as Ryuk kept his, and turned back to the portal to watch the results of his work. 

The mafia men continued to lounge around, unaware of their fate, and then without warning, an explosion ripped through the building and destroyed everything in its wake. The men’s bodies were thrown from the force of the explosion, but they were already dead before they could have reacted. There were no survivors. 

“And that’s that.” Ryuk smiled, watching as his friend’s lifespan shot up. He could probably have gotten more years out of them if they hadn’t been criminals but taking out the whole group had certainly done him a favor. His friend had only been dead a very short time, even by human standards, and he was already doing better as a Shinigami than anyone else, but maybe that was to be expected. 

“That’s that.” Chronos agreed. He looked dazedly at the portal for a second and seemed to be fighting against the urge to turn the visual back to the human boy he was so interested in, before deciding against it and taking flight. 

Ryuk smirked and jumped into the air after him. 

~ 🅚 ~

“Today’s the day,” Ryuk announced unhelpfully, although his tone was far more somber than usual. He felt something for his friend over this, he really did. He may not feel the human was at all important, but Chronos did. Still, there was nothing they could do about it. Chronos knew what would happen if he attempted to help the human. 

The reason that extending a human’s life causes a Shinigami to die is because it’s an aversion to nature. Death and even murder is a natural thing, unfettered by conventional human morality, and albeit a little aimless in their execution, a Shinigami’s duty is to feed into that nature by adding more to the funeral pyre. So a Shinigami dies when they try to go directly against their role of an agent of the world’s chaos, only able to avoid this fate if they’re given an okay by their king first. The King had once told Ryuk this, himself. 

It’s a deterrent to the others that might try this foolishness, not that Ryuk ever understood why any Shinigami would want to help a human, but it had been done before. 

Humans in their foolishness have come over the centuries to insist that all death and murder is wrong, but they also seek to needlessly bring order to the chaotic world and nature itself. To do what can never be done. Thankfully, their attempts to tame the untamable have never been successful, because the catastrophe of the natural order righting itself would be a massive bloodbath. 

How will he die? Chronos couldn’t help but ask himself repeatedly as he watched the numbers above Nate’s head whittle down to almost nothing. Soon. Far too soon. 

As the time in the boy’s life got down to a minute left, Chronos saw movement in the corner of the room. As always, Nate was in his office space/home and as was usually the case as well, he had a handful of his employees standing around at his disposal. One was new, though, and that was the individual who moved. 

Chronos wouldn’t have at all viewed it as important if it wasn’t for the fact that Nate now had fifty seconds left in his life. Almost faster than the eye could see, the “employee” whipped out a gun and yelled something that seemed nonsensical to Chronos, “For Kira!!” and took the shot. Chronos’s heart skipped several beats - huh, he didn’t know it could do that - but another attendant lunged forward and took the bullet for the widely-staring boy. They fell to the ground, dead, and Chronos…

...Chronos, for a flash, saw the image in his mind’s eye of the white-haired boy laying sprawled out on the ground like his worker, eyes staring up open yet unseeing. Chronos felt terror and revulsion as if he might throw up and cry all at once, which was strange because he didn’t believe he’d ever done either of those things. 

The movements of his own body caught him by surprise as Chronos pulled his Death Note from his side. His motions were fast and fluid as the Note was flipped open to a random page and his pen was placed to it. Beside him, Chronos saw Ryuk flinch sharply out of the corner of his eye, but he didn’t let it distract him from his mission. 

“Chronos?? What do you think you’re doing?!” Ryuk gasped, his clawed arm jutting out to grab Chronos’ Note away from him, which the younger Shinigami dodged. 

“Breaking a natural law,” Chronos responded calmly, eyeing the name hovering over the murderous human’s head. Said human looked angrily down at the dead man who had unexpectedly taken the bullet before looking back at his target and lining up for another shot at Nate. The boy’s wide eyes stared straight down the barrel in what appeared to be shock. 

“Chronos, no!” Ryuk sounded unexpectedly desperate and Chronos would likely have been staring at his friend in shock if he wasn’t a Shinigami on a mission at the moment. 

If he just wrote down the human’s name, there would be nearly a minute of wait time for their death to take effect and Nate didn’t have that. There wasn’t time! As soon as Chronos finished the name, he wrote down the means and time of death, five seconds from then. 

“No!” Ryuk lunged at Chronos again, this time with his whole body, but it was just too late. Chronos had already finished as he was knocked to the ground with the older Shinigami on top of him and his Note was ripped from his claws. 

On the portal, the assassin was stopped halfway through pulling the trigger by a heart attack. Chronos let out a sigh of relief. Nate stared at the slumped body of the assassin in utter shock. Ryuk stared at the slumped body of his friend in utter shock. 

“Why…?” Ryuk whispered, his claws shaking from where his one hand pinned an unmoving Chonos to the ground. “ Why? I knew he meant a lot to you, but﹘”

That was a lie, even Chronos didn’t understand what he was feeling. All he knew was that he had to save this particular boy’s life now. He had to make it up to him. And he did. The thought brought a small smile to the young Shinigami’s face as he let out a petal-soft sigh. His body tingled, almost numb, and a quick glance downwards with crimson eyes alerted Chronos to the expected sight of his body turning to some kind of sand. Soul sand? Whatever. 

Chronos chose to spend his last few remaining moments as his world began to turn black around the edges looking between the shocked human in the portal and the shocked Ryuk still hovering above him. Similar red eyes gazed into his own with such surprising despair that Chronos could think nothing but, I’m sorry, Ryuk. He wished he could say it, but his mouth no longer worked. 

He could move no part of his body and his consciousness was starting to fade. His vision was just about completely dark now and he could barely think. Where was he again? 

“Chronos! Light! Light-o!” Chronos heard Ryuk’s voice call out mournfully and in his last seconds of awareness, Chronos was confused. 

Who was Light? 

~ 🅚 ~

Light opened his eyes. 

And he remembered.

Chapter Text

Light stared up at the ceiling of his bedroom with the widest eyes. 

I...I can't believe it. He thought to himself, refusing to move. 

Everything felt surreal to him, like he was part of his body and also not. Like he was part of this world and also not. It felt like he'd laid on this bed only a second ago and yet at the same time, it was a lifetime ago. Everything felt disjointed.

He'd been a Shinigami. He'd died. For Near–for Nate. And now he–

–wasn't dead? 

Life is too weird, Light concluded as he raised his right hand to hover over his face and proceeded to open and close it a few times. He was alive, right? It seemed ironic that he'd experienced the feeling of dying twice but had yet to experience what actually being dead felt like, he was always being reborn into someone else. 

Light’s whole body jerked slightly as that thought reminded him of who he was just seconds ago, or so it felt like. Chronos . Not a bad name for one he hadn’t given himself, though he still liked Kira better…

Was he still Chronos?

Light reached a hand behind him and leaned away from the bed a little to feel around his back. His wings were gone, so that was a point in favor of the idea that he wasn’t a Shinigami anymore. At any rate, his exact situation was a little more important to figure out than his species at the moment. Light slowly closed his eyes and tried to sort out his memories. 

That was easier said than done, too. His mind was a jumble of two lifetimes, but it had the effect of feeling like three because a few of the memories from his first life felt like they had just happened while it was only some of the later ones that felt like a lifetime ago. The Shinigami memories were somewhere in the middle, feeling both new and old but not in a confusing way. 

Light let out a frustrated sigh as he scrunched his nose as he let himself feel a little bit of annoyance at it all for just a moment. It was obvious to...Chronos?...that his whole life had been screwy for a long time. In fact!

If he was to believe his instincts, he might have gone back in time. 

He would have to get up and check his computer, maybe go downstairs, to be sure, but he thought he was probably right and he was nowhere near being able to emotionally process that at the moment. He was still feeling numb from dying again and having all these memories shoved back in his head!! Light huffed, tiredly. His memories at least indicated that he was in his last year of high school and they weren’t the only thing.

It wasn’t enough to think that he was just in his old bedroom, he’d moved in with Misa years before his death and he remembered living for a handful of years more as a Shinigami before dying so it had been nearly ten years since he’d been in this room! Even if for some absurd reason his room had been kept the exact same as how he’d left it when he moved out, there were still some things missing, things he’d bought sometime after becoming Kira and left there when he moved out. They weren’t here. 

And then there were the memories! 

His Shinigami memories were pretty normal, but again there was a strange doubling effect in some of his human memories. He can remember his whole first life as Light and then becoming Kira like it was a straight line, but his earlier memories of that life - like the ones from his last year of high school - feel like they happened more recently than the last of his experiences before he died (as a human, mind). 

That only makes any kind of sense if dying as a Shinigami had brought him back in time or, Light supposed, to another dimension identical to his own in every way. It was irrelevant whichever one it was, the effect was the same so it didn’t matter. Time travel would at least explain why some of his comparatively older memories felt the freshest like they had just happened while things he knew he had done later on in his life felt like they’d happened two (admittedly short) lifetimes ago...

Light’s old self from long past would have scoffed at the idea out of hand, but he’d decided around the time he met Ryuk the first time around to just assume everything is possible. He’d mostly just tossed his skepticism out of his bedroom window and never looked back. 

Screw logic and critical thinking! It wasn’t going to help with the surreal dumpster fire that his life became after the Death Note! 

….

…

..

.

Huh. Death Note. 

Now that he thought about it, his memories of his boring schoolday and picking up the Death Note outside his school were the clearest in his mind. With that realization, Light took no time in forcing his numb body off his bed and over to where his backpack laid on the floor. 

His heart began to beat wildly as he flipped it open and rooted around inside it. He’d barely started when his hand hit something that felt familiar and he slowly drew it out of his bag. The black binding and cover with a white script steadily emerged before his eyes. 

There it is , Light thought to himself as he looked down at the notebook in his hands. The Death Note. His hands were shaking as he maneuvered the Note open to the first page...and there was nothing there. He flipped through more pages. It was empty. 

He hadn’t written in it yet. 

Light...Light remembered this day. He’d had his day at school, lamented how rotten the world was, found the Note, and brought it home after feeling the strong urge to check it out. His fresher memories stopped there and his older ones picked up, reminding him of how he’d gone about testing out the Note that night and immediately lost his shit. He definitely remembered writing out at least two full pages of names by the time he met Ryuk about five days later. 

He’d pretty much gotten the proof of where (or when) he was, but he didn’t remember the date, so he went ahead with turning on his computer, anyway. November 28th. He checks the year just to be sure and yep, that checks out. He stared at the date as he thought. That makes it almost three months before he meets L. 

Light sucked in a breath as some of the weight of what it meant to be back in time hit him. If he hadn’t lived as a Shinigami for a while, he would probably have gone mental right then and there. As it stood, took a shaky breath and closed his eyes for a moment, forcing himself to continue thinking analytically about the situation, even as the thought of that person made his mind want to come to a crashing halt. 

Light leaned back in his chair as his breath left him in an instant. Those eyes as deep as the ocean were still seared into his memory, even after all this time! He felt ashamed that he had ever forgotten the detective for a second, even if it hadn’t been his fault. 

As a Shinigami, he had been watching over Near, but if L had still been alive at the time, Light was sure he would have been watching over him more. That man. That infuriating, wonderful man that had spent almost a year making his mark on Light’s life that would never go away. And how could it? Light had never loved anyone before L and never did again. Oh yes, he’d had no idea his feelings for the detective at the time, but he did now. 

He’d taken L for granted, in a way. The man was almost as messed up as Light had been in many ways, but Light had still loved him as much as he was ever able to love anybody at the time, not that he’d ever realized it in that life even as his feelings grew stronger in the man’s absence. 

Thinking over things right before you die and then experiencing life as a Shinigami again before dying really gives one different perspectives. Enough to realize when you’ve been an idiot. And Light had certainly won the prize for that. 

He’d been such a jerk and honestly, that was putting it nicely. He was an out-and-out psychopath after a while and that god complex looks even more ridiculous in retrospect after his time spent as an actual god. He started it all just as much because he was bored as it was any goals he’d had for bettering the world. Sure he had his vision and he still did, but it was far less noble than he’d let himself believe and it quickly devolved into a battle for survival and pride between him and L and then Nate. Poor young Nate, who he tried to kill . 

What was it that he read in one of his college courses: the lies one tells oneself are perhaps the worst of all? How ironic. And true. Light had lied to himself and he had done so regularly. He’d wanted to make the world a better place, but he was motivated by so much self-interest underneath it all and he didn’t want to face that at the time, to let go of his idea of himself as a good person. 

So he excused every action he did instead of facing his own flaws and trying to better himself, resorting to demonizing everyone who crossed him even the slightest bit in his mad dash to absolve himself of any blame. Meanwhile, he had complete contempt for everyone he killed, criminals and innocents alike.

He’d treated his friends (he uses the term loosely) and family like utter garbage even while putting them through so much. And the person he regretted his treatment of the most? 

Matsuda. Looking back on it with all his memories, Light realized Matsuda had been a good friend to him, the best friend, and a good coworker. He was always there to show his support in the case and come to Light - and even Kira’s - defense. He was kind and thoughtful and from the moment Light had joined the investigation, Matsuda had stuck with him. And what was his reward? Betrayal and contempt! 

Light groaned and rubbed his face roughly in agitation at just the mere thought of his last day alive. 

Sure, Matsuda had shot him, but only after he’d been pushed too damn far. Really, the man was practically a saint for putting up with both Light and L for as long as he did. Even when Light finally came out as Kira, Matsuda had still tried to understand him first, ask him his reasons! If Light thought he might have taken L for granted, then he absolutely failed to appreciate Matsuda and all that he had to offer before he died!

Light sat up, staring at the date on his computer again. 

…

...

He wanted to make it up to Matsuda, be the friend he should have been before. 

His eyes drifted to the Death Note. I wonder, Light thought. Why I happened to come back to right after I got this. Why not before I ever picked it up? Could it be a coincidence? ...Maybe, strange things just happen without reason often enough, I suppose. Still, there’s the question of what I’m expected to do now. 

Being a Shinigami had given Light perspective and not just on how not to be full of himself. He’d seen death as a just punishment back then, but it wasn’t. Death might not be fun when you’re faced with losing your life or the life of a loved one, but it wasn’t some cosmic punishment for wrongdoing.  

Death...was just a natural part of existence. People and creatures had to die, it was just a matter of where and when. And the Shinigami...existed to fill that role. Sure, people died all the time without a Shinigami’s help, but death was renewal. You get the most renewal when there are creatures specifically created to make that happen. 

Most Shinigami were bored with existence, they didn’t care about humans, and if Light had been like them then he probably wouldn’t even bother doing anything with this chance he’d been given, but he was himself. 

At the end of the day, Light did care. It was probably as Ryuk said, he was an eternal optimist. He wanted to believe that making any change, any small change, made a lasting difference. Even if there was no meaning to existence, that just meant he could create his own meaning. Even if humans would still fight and squabble and murder, cutting back on even a little bit of that could do something good for someone. 

At the end of the day, wasn’t that the best thing he could hope to do with his existence? Make at least one person’s life a little better? It was the reason he’d killed criminals as a Shinigami when he was adding to his years. At the end of the day, he cared about humanity and still wanted to do what he could to help some of them out. He still wanted to try and make a change!

Light is a Shinigami at heart now, even if he still cares more than any Shinigami should. He wasn’t going to shy away from death or his second chance just to lead a normal life, he’d honestly never be normal now, anyway. 

This wouldn’t be like last time. He wouldn’t be like last time. But acting as Kira had done so much good along with all of the bad and if he didn’t pick up the mantle again, those good things would never happen. Light didn’t know if he was doing right, didn’t know if this was the answer, but it felt right to him. He was never going to do any different, Shinigami had one real purpose in existence. That was who he was!

Speaking of people needing help…

It was as Light came to his decision that he remembered exactly how he had tested out the Death Note the first time. He picked up his remote and turned on his little tv, finding it already on the local news. It was immediately obvious that nothing had happened yet, the news was relatively calm. They were just showing some stock footage and he looked away before the news anchor came on. 

Yet if things really were as he suspected, soon the news would be interrupted by a madman holding a preschool of all things hostage. The children and adults might make it out okay if Light didn’t use the Note unlike last time, but he still remembered how clearly dangerous the man who caused the incident had been and so there was every chance that one or more children would die. 

Light smirked lightly, letting out a breathy laugh as he did so. Better start this killing party off with a bang, then! 

Light left the channel on, raising the volume a little bit, and got up from his desk. He’d keep an ear out for the news report. He didn’t remember the criminal’s name so he’d have to wait for the report, even if he wished he could remember that mundane bit of information just to save those poor kids and caretakers the unnecessary trauma. 

Light’s heart ached at the thought of what it must have been like to go through that. Having some man come into their preschool waving a gun and taking them hostage, not sure if they would survive, cops outside, then seeing the man drop dead!

Light’s ears pricked up as he heard the news being interrupted and threw himself back at his desk, opening the Death Note and grabbing a pen. His eyes unwaveringly stared at the tv as a news report that felt like the textbook definition of deja vu played, waiting for the moment. 

There it was! 

The criminal’s face was shown on the screen and there was his name underneath it. Light quickly jotted down the name and waited with bated breath, hoping that no one was shot in the time it took the criminal to die. People changed their fates and the fates of others all the time. 

Hell, that’s what he and the other Shinigami had always done each time they put their pens to paper, so just because it didn’t happen last time didn’t mean he wasn’t worried this time. Please don’t let anyone get hurt. 

“Hold on, the hostages are coming out!” The news reporter yelled excitedly, holding a hand to his ear. 

He needn’t have worried, the children and caretakers rushed out of the building forty seconds later, all with scared but relieved looks on their faces and all perfectly unharmed. Some of them even looked happy! 

Light allowed himself a small smile. That was what he should have been doing this for the first time, the joy of people being given the chance to live another day and the personal satisfaction of being the one to do that for them. 

He watched the small group crying tears of joy and being taken care of by the police for a few moments longer before the camera left them and went back to the reporter, who was saying that the police were heading into the building. Light turned the tv off then, he didn’t need to see the rest of it. 

This was it, then. He was really doing this and honestly? It felt great! He had so much changed from the person he once was, but at the end of the day he would still be himself and this was his way. It felt like everything he was made for. 

“Ah!” Light breathed out sharply and brought a hand to one of his eyes. His eyes stung! It wasn’t too bad, but it did still make him flinch a little in pain. Did he get something in them? Jeez!

Light rubbed his eyes lightly as he scooted his desk chair back and stood up. He should probably wash them out with some water and if that didn’t work he’d have to try something else. 

Light had to squint his eyes open as he made his way to his bathroom and slid through the door. He didn’t waste a minute in hunching himself over the sink and turning on the tap, splashing a generous amount of water onto his face and eyes. 

When he was done, Light reached over blindly for a towel and wiped his face with it as he spat out the water that’d gotten into his mouth. He was pleased to note that his eyes were feeling better now and thought it’d only been a minor annoyance...until he looked up into the mirror and gasped. 

His golden eyes went wide at what he saw. It wasn’t that there was anything behind him, but instead something above him. His name floating in red letters above his head in just the way he could see people’s names when he’d been a Shinigami. 

Light was beyond words, he was shocked, and as he stared at himself - or rather, the name - in the mirror, he then saw that for just a moment, his golden-brown eyes flashed a crimson red.

Chapter Text

Light stared at his reflection and the words Light Yagami above his head. 

What the hell is going on here? Light thought, watching his own eyes. They didn’t flash red again. I have...my eyes back. My eyes are back! 

The thought felt strange even to him because of his two sets of memories. His golden human eyes felt like his own, the ones he’d had since he was born and seen in the mirror every day, but his crimson Shinigami eyes felt familiar in the same way like they were the ones he’d always had. 

Light leaned closer to the mirror and lightly touched the area under his right eye, peering closely at them. His reflection and the hovering name were right up against the mirror now. Why can’t I see my lifespan? Light wondered to himself. Can someone just never see their own lifespan? 

The mirror wasn’t giving him any answers so after a few minutes, he peeled himself away from it and went back to his room. With the habit of a lifetime of stress, Light made a beeline for his led and laid back on it, laying his head on one of his arms like a pillow. 

Here he was again, staring up at the ceiling and wondering how his life had come to this. And what to do now. That, of course, was a concern, especially now that he apparently had his Shinigami eyes back for no reason. 

He’d already established that he would always be Kira, in this life or any other, but there was no way he was going to go about it the same as before. He was horrified and disgusted by most of his actions from before and that was two lives ago, anyway. At his core, he was the same person, but like an adult looking back on their childish teenage years, he’d outgrown the person he used to be. 

Light sighed and closed his eyes lightly, deciding to look at nothing as he thought. 

He needed to decide what his more immediate actions were. He’d kept things the same so far, which he mostly just did because his morals found it unconscionable that he could let the people he knew would be in a hostage situation get hurt. However, it had the nice effect of keeping the timeline the way he remembered it so he had more time to think about what he actually wanted to change. 

Light’s hand clenched into a fist around his bedsheets for a second as he remembered something. Speaking of people I saved the first time around, that woman- 

He’d forgotten about her the first time around, she hadn’t mattered to him for long, but he remembered now that he saved a woman that night who was about to be raped outside of a convenience store. It was outside a business, but it was unlikely someone would come outside to help her if they noticed given how intimidating those guys were, any bystanders would call the police and unlike with the hostage situation, Light was under no illusions what would happen if even a minute or two passed without interference in that situation. The police wouldn’t make it in time. 

Light forced his fist to unclench, but he was still so angry at the thought. Rapists were the worst. Attacking people in such a way was far worse than the murder of innocent people, even if both actions were terrible. Light deeply mourned his willingness to kill anyone who crossed him, even if they posed no threat to anyone besides himself, though he personally still believed he’d done something right with the first two names he wrote down in his Note. 

He barely remembered the incident with the woman, so he would definitely have to go to the scene again that night and wait around for it to happen, so he could get the rapist’s name and face again. Light glanced at his alarm clock. He had time. He wanted to get there early, just in case, and he didn’t remember the exact time it happened, but he remembered it was pitch dark at the time and it was only early evening now. 

And after that? Light paused there. After he killed the rapist, what would he do from there? There was no one else off the top of his head that he needed to kill ASAP to avoid someone getting hurt, but he would need to have a stronger idea about how he was going to move forward this time as Kira. 

His Shinigami experiences made it seem just the opposite, like just about anything he did as long as it wasn’t with the same cruelty as before would be alright. After all, he did end up making his mark on the world the first time around regardless, and even for as young a death god as he was, he knew that human lives and their societies themselves were ridiculously transient. By that belief, trying to attribute meaning to life, actions, human suffering was a fool’s errand. 

Light didn’t truly feel all of that to be true, not completely, but becoming a god of death no matter how short of a stint, has changed a good deal of his worldview. As a human, the world seems so big that you never realize just how narrow your own worldview is. You see so little and yet it feels like you see so much. And then you die. 

And suddenly it’s like the camera zooms out and the very things that took up so much of your sight before are now so small you can barely see them at all. Nothing becomes clearer, just...simpler. 

As a human, Light was always ascribing meaning to all manner of things, from believing that things like fate were on his side, to even convincing himself at one point that he had been intentionally given the Death Note, despite distinctly remembering now that Ryuk had told him it was merely chance. Regardless of the skeptics out there (like L), humans as a species tended to do that a lot. 

It was...easier to blame occurrences both good and bad on fate or gods or karma...and it was all air. It was easier for humans to do this because the only alternative was to face the realization that the world is an uncaring void, in a way at least. It is easier for humans to say that people are uncaring rather than the universe because the universe can’t be corrected, but if it’s a human that’s the problem, then the uncomfortable feeling of inevitable nothingness at the end of each one of their journeys moves further away and they can breathe again. 

It’s hilarious in a way because humans care so much, more than any other known beings. They want things to have meaning, idealistically so, as if it will make their struggles any less grueling or their successes any more glorious. And Light…

...was absolutely no exception to this. Even when he was a Shinigami without his memories, a trace of his former humanity lingered so strongly in him that anyone could tell it was there. He only killed criminals when he wanted to add years onto his lifespan, he fascinated himself with the human’s struggles becoming invested in their little stories, and he especially kept his protective watch over Nate. 

Ironically, he might have shown more human kindness and caring as a Shinigami than he ever had in his first life as a human. 

The fact of the matter was that Light did care. He knew that the universe had no meaning and that all of life’s struggles and triumphs, each petty goal, and even existence itself had no higher purpose and any small significance one could find in any of those things would be worn away by the waves of time before the blink of a Shinigami’s eyes. 

And, his Shinigami side reminded him, it was practical. In his past life, even if he’d ended up killing thousands of innocent individuals falsely accused of crimes or guilty of only petty crimes (the full truth of the matter will never be known, even to him), his work as Kira had managed to stop all wars and serious crime worldwide had dropped by over 70%. 

Even without taking into consideration how many people were saved by the lack of wars and war crimes - a not insubstantial number - there are hundreds of thousands of murders each year. 

As Light picked through his computer, moving along with his thoughts, he started piecing together a picture of the world as it was at the moment, a view which had gotten disjointed when he was removed from it at his death. He was slightly reminded of why he had been so disillusioned with the world the first time around, enough to think it was rotten to the core if his memory served, even if now felt nowhere near that amount of emotional impact after all this time. 

A study was done by the Geneva Declaration on Armed Violence and Development there were apparently around 480,000 “intentional homicides” - whatever that encapsulated - in 2004, for example. Ah, the internet. Anyway, if that dropped by 70% during his time as Kira, then just with that one aspect of crime alone, he entirely prevented 336,000 murders never mind just getting justice for them.

Even the innocent lives he took weren’t in vain, as they acted as a deterrent for the vast majority of people who committed crimes, and crimes like sexual assault and domestic abuse weren’t let off just because certain world governments didn’t think those kind of crimes were worth their time, but it wasn’t like there weren’t flaws in that system besides false convictions and questions about the dubious morality of killing people at all.

The US, in particular, had a crazy amount of people in prison and Japan had a brutal 99.8% conviction rate even if their violent crime was much lower compared to the US and Japan did also have quite the problem with violent or abusive suspect questioning methods. Governments were also just sending him names near the end and he wasn’t naive enough these days to think that there weren’t some people just thrown onto that list that the courts hadn’t properly investigated or that someone with money didn’t just want gotten rid of. 

Also, third-world countries had a lot less information available to the public about domestic crimes, and Light hadn’t sent informants to keep an eye on things there firsthand, which might have mitigated that weakness somewhat, so they didn’t have his “protection” as much as first-world countries. 

That was the heart of the dilemma that the idea of Kira had always brought up and why it proved so divisive to the human population. 

It was incredibly flawed, it was, but so was traditional government. Even if Light no longer believed he was unquestionably right about things, able to question himself, he still had his own beliefs at the end of the day. Even as a Shinigami, he hadn’t looked at the human’s attempts to govern themselves and thought it particularly successful. 

As crass and self-serving as his acts ultimately were in that timeline, they got results. Undeniably this success was crafted by sacrificing individuals for the whole good and that didn’t sit completely right with him, but he still got better results than organized government ever had and they were results that the whole of the world got to enjoy in the closest thing to peace that humanity - the chaotic cacophony that they were - would ever know. 

And the biggest advantage to that peace was the ability for people to not have to lock their doors at night or to be able to go out without constant justified fear of being harmed by someone else. Because there was a giant hammer resting above them all, should anyone try anything funny. 

It was enough to write a dystopian future novel. 

He knew this and yet he couldn’t find it in himself to be disheartened. If anything, it spurred him on. If his life had no destined path, then he was free to do whatever he wanted with it! If existence had no inherent meaning, then he could think up a meaning of his own for it! 

Maybe Light wasn’t a writer, but just like any writer, he would assert that there was nothing more inspiring than a blank page, there for you to write down whatever came to mind with reckless abandon!

But that did bring up the question of what to do this time as Kira. His Shinigami side that whatever he did wouldn’t matter anyway so he could do whatever, and his human side optimistically insisted that each action had an effect and a consequence and he needed to take into account both of those. 

One side said that not everything - practically nothing - can have meaning and the other asserts that everything has at least the potential to. 

Light gently rubbed his forehead as he felt a small headache start to form. Both beliefs were clashing in his mind, warring for dominance but neither could win because neither was wrong. It wasn't wrong to not want to obsess over the significance of everything in existence and it wasn't wrong to care . 

And he didn’t want to be the person that willingly sacrificed the innocent anymore, even if it was the most direct path to saving the most people. He wasn’t his old self anymore who only happily saw one way of doing things. 

So how did he move forward from here? Not just as only Kira or as only Chronos, but both? How did he do this as Light? 

Light glanced down at the Death Note. Somehow, seeing it comforted him. It was just a dark item that could be used to “cull the herd” of humans, but it brought him ease. Maybe it was just the only solid idea he had to hold onto…

Well first, some ground rules. Light didn’t want to risk writing his rules down since once the police (L) started investigating him, things were going to get crazy. So, he seared them into his mind instead. 

1. His story - whatever it would turn out to be - would not be a battle of pride with L. This wasn’t some game to play together, even if Light secretly was going to have some fun with this anyway. He could maybe still use some select criminals to send messages, but killing criminals every hour on the hour just to taunt someone is just too far. 
2. It also wouldn’t be a battle for survival. If he died, he died! That was the benefit of no longer feeling quite so human as before. He wasn’t afraid to die, this world wasn’t his only one. Besides, he’d already died twice already, what’s a third? He wouldn’t kill to extend his own life, only someone else’s. 
3. He needed to look into the people he killed, no exceptions. False convictions happen, people who look guilty as sin could be innocent as angels, it happens. Innocent people will die with this route, just as they do every day, but he needed to do his research so that no one died because he was lazy or because he just didn’t care. That meant he couldn’t kill in the proportions he had before, but that was alright. If he killed criminals with just heart attacks, then it wouldn’t take much longer for the world governing bodies to notice, anyway. This leads into the next rule: 
4. He wouldn’t knowingly kill someone innocent. No killing officers who had the gall to fight against him, no killing civilians who had the temerity to disagree with his beliefs, no killing allies who had served their purpose and were just liabilities now, and absolutely no killing FBI agents. 
5. The last one isn’t a rule, but Light noted it, anyway. Past him was an idiot! Everything would have been fine on the FBI Investigation Into The Police And Their Families issue if he’d just laid low and let the agent write his report. He hadn’t done anything suspicious warranting further investigation until he’d killed the twelve agents!

Light reviewed his mental notes and decided that was good for now, he’d internalized all of the important stuff. Light glanced outside and saw that the sun was starting to go down. He still wasn’t sure when the assault at the convenience store happened, but he might as well get there early. 

Light walked to the nearest convenience store to his house, the one it happened at, and milled about inside for a while. He mostly hung around the magazine rack as the night got later, more so staring out the glass windows than at the actual magazines. Light imagined feeling the Death Note in his bag heating up as his energy ramped up. The brunette forced himself to breathe in and out deeply, but he’d lost a lot of his ability to control his outward emotions when he became a Shinigami. 

Finally, he heard the yelling and his eyes sharpened into focus. There it is . 

A small group of bikers were loudly harassing a sweet-looking woman who was standing on the curb just in front of the convenience store. 

“Hey, Pretty Lady!” The leading creep greeted. “The name’s Takuo Shibuimaru!” 

“I-I don’t want any tr-trouble…” The poor woman tried. 

“You hear that? Ha! She doesn’t want any trouble!” 

It was like rewatching an old movie he’d forgotten almost everything about and from there it escalated incredibly fast. Two of the men used an iron bar across her neck to hold her down while she gasped and struggled and the leader announced he was going to “strip her down right here” and started trying to open her fly while she desperately attempted to stop him. 

Light gnashed his teeth in rage at it all. He hadn’t needed the announcement, of course, since he could see the man’s name and lifespan above once he was in sight, but at least it bought him some time. He immediately started writing down the name, going as fast as he could. 

“No! Stop! Please!” The woman (Aina, he could see her name was) screamed in terror as the men made grotesque sounds of joy at what they were doing. “HELP ME!” She cried out in desperation. 

I’m working on it! Light replied mentally with as much desperation, finally finishing the last of the conditions for Takuo’s death. 

He had briefly considered on the walk over to the convenience store killing this man with a heart attack, considering he didn’t need to test if the Death Note was real this time, but if he did that, the woman might just stand there in shock as he collapsed instead of running away as she did before. If that happened, she might still be in danger at the end of it all and he wasn’t risking her like that. He did it the same as the previous timeline. 

The woman managed to break free of the group, thanks to the aid of the Death Note making good on his death conditions, and took off into the street with precise timing. The leader laughed and zoomed off after her, he never saw the truck coming but his teammates did. Too bad. 

The woman continued running, as the truck missed her by a few feet. She was traumatized as hell but physically unharmed as she got away. 

He could get the other ones since he could see all their names and faces, but that would be enough for now; he didn’t need a pile of bodies in front of the convenience store. They were in shock from their friend’s death and the woman was running away. 

Light took a long moment to write each of the panicking men’s names down in his Note, specifying the time of death to be staggered over the coming week but leaving the method down to a heart attack. 

Light clapped his Note closed and gave a satisfied smirk.

~ 🅚 ~

Five days passed him like a blur. He’d barely written any more names in the Note and instead focussed on researching potential criminals. There were thankfully a good amount of criminals he didn’t have to do any research on if he knew where to look for them so he wrote one of those per day, along with scheduling many of them ahead of time. 

People like convicted serial killers, serial rapists that had quite the rap sheet for evidence, and people who - guilty of their convictions or not - he could see had almost nothing left to their lifespans. These were people he didn’t need to worry about writing down as much. 

What Light had spent most of those five days researching, in particular, were criminals he remembered being broadcasted during the time there were cameras in his house. Remembering what happened with L, the surveillance, and then the imprisonment meant also remembering how hard it was to kill new criminals without revealing the Death Note and how he’d resorted to killing petty criminals out of desperation. Which is something he would absolutely not do this time around. 

If L chose the same method of information gathering as last time, Light now had an additional advantage: more knowledge. Light had also done some digging retroactively after he saw the cameras in his room were removed to find any serious criminals he might have missed while playing his game with L. That, of course, was before the To-Oh ceremony where everything changed pace. 

Light used what he could remember of the news reports from that period and his late-breaking research to find the individuals again. Many were already being charged for their crimes, although they weren’t yet convicted. He knew that happened though during that time, so if he could weed out the less serious crimes and the ones he wasn’t sure they were guilty of, he could write those criminals’ names down early and schedule them in advance for the time the cameras are in his house. 

He could not watch any news or touch the Death Note at all during that entire time and brand new, serious criminals would still be dying because time travel gave him access to future information. So he researched on his off time from school, which was a bit hard to get back into, even if the schoolwork was easier than ever.

As the fifth day rolled around, Light wondered if Ryuk would come as he did before. Would it be wrong if he was truly hoping for it? Ryuk...was the closest thing to a friend he’d ever had, in both lives. He was the only being he could ever be himself with and be accepted for it all. 

Light was stopped at the door by his mother, holding out her hands without a word and her eyes closed. It took Light an embarrassing amount of time to realize what she wanted, staring at her for nearly a full minute, before he got that she wanted that stupid test he had that day. 

The brunette realized that he had never noticed in his previous life how little attention his mother had ever paid attention to him as a person. She took the test, gushed to him about his score being the best, and then took off to go call her friends and tell them. She called out to him as Light ascended the stairs to his room, asking if he wanted something special to celebrate, but it felt to him like small comfort given that she hadn’t even asked him about his day or how he felt. 

He called back down to her that he wanted apple pie for dinner without breaking his stride. He knew she would think that was a very strange request from him, but he also knew that she would do it anyway, so he went straight to his room to wait for Ryuk. He would wait for him.

At some point, it started raining buckets and lightning was flashing. He had his table lamp lighting the room a little, but every so often the lightning would make the room flash brighter for a few seconds. Light waited, staring at the clock as it ticked, even though he didn’t know when his Shinigami friend would show. 

“Boo.” Someone announced in a deep voice behind him, accompanied by the soft sound of wings flapping. Light jerked in his seat and hit his stomach against the desk. Coughing, the teen turned around and saw who he had longed to see. 

“Ryuk!” Light cried out, seeing the Shinigami looming just behind him. 

“Light-o!” Ryuk called back, his tone happily mocking Light’s own. That pulled him up short and not just for the obvious reason. 

“You--Ryuk, you remember me?” Light breathed out, his caramel eyes widening. 

“Sure do!” Ryuk laughed, his voice gravelly. “And it seems you do, too.” He sounds inordinately pleased with this fact. 

“But...how?” Light asked, taking a step closer. 

Ryuk shrugged. “The Shinigami realm is separate from the human realm. Time works there differently and if a timeline is restarted in the human realm, it doesn’t affect our realm.” The Shinigami paused here and gave Light a significant look. “Or us. We Shinigami don’t have our memories affected by screwups in the timeline as human’s memories are.” 

Light was shocked into silence shortly. “But Ryuk, I am human now.” He reminded, but there a hint of being unsure in his voice.

“Ah,” Ryuk made a dismissive gesture. “You may look like a human, but at your core, you’re still a Shinigami. That notebook you’ve been writing in isn’t mine and it isn’t Sidoh’s, ours were unaffected by the human world’s time getting reset. That notebook there is yours, no other Shinigami’s. It followed you. It would probably still have the names you wrote down in it as Chronos if it hadn’t gotten sent back into time with you.” Light followed Ryuk’s gaze to the Death Note on his desk, feeling happiness spike in him at Ryuk’s words. The Shinigami continued. 

“Since you’re like this right now, you can probably get away with a little bit more, like killing humans without a Death Note and saving their lives without sacrificing yourself for them, but that only makes you part human. Hey, don’t forget that, okay? You’re still one of us at the end of the day!” The other Shinigami rested a clawed finger over Light’s heart. 

Light felt his eyes moisten and he rubbed the tears away as they felt. “Yeah.” Light allowed, feeling warmth swell in his chest for a second. “I’ll try not to forget that.” He never wanted to. 

A second ticked by and then in a burst of movement, Ryuk closed the distance between them and wrapped Light’s small human body in a feather-and-leather hug. “I was happy to see you here when I looked down at the human realm after your notebook disappeared. I missed you, Light.” The Shinigami whispered, as soft as his voice could go. 

Light, who had frozen during the first part of the hug, melted into it at his friend’s words and wrapped his own arms around Ryuk’s back. “Missed you, too.” He found himself saying and he meant it.

It was so nice to have him here. He felt...alone...without Ryuk. 

“You’re planning on sticking around, then?” Light asked, almost rhetorically. Ryuk answered anyway. 

“Of course! Let’s give the other Shinigami a show!” Ryuk growled with a fierce grin. 

“Didn’t think of that!” Light laughed, wondering how many of the other Shinigami would be watching his actions as Kira from the Shinigami realm this time. “Better get started then, maybe you can help me scope out some prospective criminals since they can’t see you? I have a lot of planning to do in the next month.” 

“What happens in a month, Light-o?” Ryuk asked curiously, hovering over his friend. 

“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten, Ryuk.” Light gave his best buddy a close-eyed smile, his tone lighthearted. “I haven’t forgotten.” 

Light then turned just his head to peer over his shoulder at the dark screen of his personal tv, remembering a certain “nationwide” broadcast. Ryuk couldn’t see his face, but he heard the wistful tone in Light’s voice as his next words eeked out from his lips in a petal-soft whisper. “I haven’t forgotten, at all.”

Chapter Text

L settled down on the floor of the nearly empty room, prepared to stay there as long as it took to get the information he needed. Everything was set up, it was time. 

L sat in front of a laptop. Positioned behind said laptop was a television set, turned to a specific channel. Black irises watched the news channel unblinkingly as they went about their mundane business until suddenly the news was interrupted. A man came on-screen reading from a sheet of paper, looking almost scared and L smirked. 

People in the news office raced around behind the man in a state of panic, clearly trying to figure out what was going on since L knew for a fact they didn’t get any warning for this. 

A pale thumb found its way to slightly less pale lips and pressed down. Now’s the time, L thought to himself. The stage is set, the curtain is rising. Kira, what will you do I wonder, when put under a little pressure. He stared unblinkingly at the screen as Mr. Lind L. Tailor came onscreen, looking serious and focused. 

Honestly, the convict looked much like the police officers who’d arrested him when put in a suit. He was handsome and solemn, exactly what L figured most people expected the Great Detective L to look like. The detective’s smirk tugged wider in amusement at the thought. All in all, Mr. Tailor was an excellent red herring to draw out Kira. 

The question was, what would happen now? 

L was sure that Kira would take the bait if he could. He’d written the lines of Mr. Tailor’s speech to be as inflammatory as possible and someone who hated criminals with a murderous passion would not take well to being called evil. Someone killing off criminals was clearly on some self-righteous mission to cleanse the world. 

No, the question wasn’t if Kira would get mad enough to kill Taylor, the question was if he actually could. 

To do so, unless there was some other option L had failed to consider, he would have to possess psychic powers. His suspicions that Kira needs a name and a face to kill an individual also gave credence to that idea, as being able to kill anyone with only a name and a face in a way that doesn’t involve hiring an assassin sounds remarkably like the rules made up in many fantasy novels. It simply didn’t make sense otherwise. 

Yet...was he really supposed to believe that? That Kira had some heretofore unheard of psychic power to give people heart attacks with the limitation of knowing their name and face? Such things should not be reasonably possible, it went against everything L had come to believe in his life. 

No, it would be woefully inaccurate to say that he truly believed Kira was capable of this...but he had to test it. He had to be sure and regardless of what abilities - psychic or otherwise - that Kira had, his method of killing would be made clearer with this method of testing. L would likely come away with more clues than he’d gone in with.

No details should be discarded without analysis and no conclusion could be ignored without proper investigation. L simply had to test it and not perfunctorily, either. That was the purpose of this little stunt with Lind L. Tailor. The news station L was commandeering knew nothing about what was about to happen and even the Japanese police didn’t know much about his plans. Only L knew what he had in store for Kira…

L’s internal monologue quieted as he observed Mr. Tailor’s speech as the man began to speak, his full attention on the condemned criminal acting as bait. 

“I head up an international police task force which includes all member nations, I am Lind. L. Tailor.” The slightly tinny voice of the man came from the small television. He spoke with confidence, which L could appreciate. It was almost too bad that his crimes already had him on death row, he would have been useful to L if he could have recruited him. “Otherwise known as L.” 

“People all around the world are being killed by a serial killer. I consider this to be the most atrocious act of murder in history. I will not rest until the person or persons responsible are brought to justice. Kira, I will hunt you down. I will find you.” 

Just because L was using a proxy for this little test of his didn’t mean he wasn’t going to use the opportunity to make some promises to Kira. Although Mr. Tailor was only a fake L, the words he had written for the man to read were more or less how he truly thought. Barring, of course, the lines he wrote in just to get a reaction out of Kira. 

“Kira, I’ve got a pretty good idea of what your motivation might be and I can guess what you hope to accomplish,” Tailor started gearing up. L leaned a little closer to the tv set. This was the big one. “However, what you are doing right now, is evil.” 

L watched. Several very long moments passed with nothing happening. 

As the seconds ticked by L at first thought they felt longer than they were, but then a minute passed by and then two. As the two-minute and ten seconds mark hit, L began to bite his thumb. Perhaps this should be taken as support for the conclusion that the idea of Kira having psychic powers was indeed as absurd as it sounded. 

Maybe Kira wasn’t in the Kanto region of Japan. That was quite possible since the only reason he was running this in the Kanto region first was its status as Japan’s most populous area. At any rate, I expected his plan to go well overall but there were always a few snags. He’d wait a minute and then he’d have Mr. Taylor read the closing notes and try again, this time broadcasting in a different area. Kansai is next on the list…

Taylor stood up. 

L’s mind jerked to attention and directed itself wholly towards the man whose eyes suddenly looked much more vacant than they had a moment earlier. L was intrigued. 

“I am not the World’s Greatest Detective!” Taylor proclaimed in a loud, clear voice. He sounded more like he was just reading lines than he had during the entire first half of the broadcast and what he said caused L to pop forwards towards the TV. “I am a convicted criminal set to die today, being used as a pawn by L. L is cruel for scheduling my execution to happen on live TV!” 

Taylor’s eyes lost their blank look as he jerked in pain and let out a grunt. His hand clenched in his shirt above his heart and then collapsed harshly against the desk he’d been provided with. The whole news office was deadly silent, one could have heard a cockroach coughing. Perhaps people were talking and they had temporarily muted the broadcast from their end, L didn’t bother checking. 

The detective stared wide-eyed, mouth gaping at the screen. What had just occurred was…

L’s hand shot forward before he was even consciously aware of it and flew across his laptop’s keyboard. The tv screen in the room switched from the view of Mr. Taylor’s body being carried off-screen by representatives of law enforcement to a white screen with a capital L in black stamped on it, L’s symbol. 

L gasped out the words his brain told him he needed to say, even as he felt he was working more on instinct. What had just happened was… “I had to test it just in case, but I–I never guessed it would actually happen.” The detective spoke into his microphone, hearing his own computer-modulated voice coming quietly from the tv set. 

L’s shock might have been making his words come out a tad more honest than they otherwise might have been, so he quickly covered by moving forward with his monologue. “Kira, it seems you can kill people without having to be there in person. I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t just witnessed it.” Seeing was believing, after all. 

And how painfully true that was. L had made his life about his detective work and his open-mindedness had served him well, but being open-minded and truly believing that something unbelievable would occur were completely different things. L felt his own heart pounding rapidly in his chest, but he didn’t want to move either of his hands to give in to the urge to rub the spot of his shirt over his heart. L was baffled and the fact that Kira could truly kill people without touching them wasn’t even half of what was getting him so upset. 

“What you said about Lind L. Tailor, that is correct.” It felt like a defeat just to say the words, conceding to Kira when their fight had only just begun. L would pay him back for it later in their game, but to have sustained a blow to his side so soon into it… “He was indeed a Death Row inmate who was scheduled to be executed today. I will admit...I don’t know how you knew that or if it was just a lucky guess, but your assumption was nonetheless correct, he was not the Detective L. I am."

L would need to think about that after the broadcast. Tailor had been arrested in absolute secrecy, so there was no way that - should Kira be a civilian - the killer would have heard about him online or in the news. 

That brought to mind two obvious but singularly discomforting conclusions: Kira either had more psychic abilities that allowed him to access information that he shouldn’t be able to get and he was all the more dangerous for it or Kira was or was working with a member of upper-level law enforcement. If the latter were true, they would have to be very high up indeed to have access to that knowledge. 

If the former conclusion was true, then it made what L was still planning to do next all the more dangerous. If L wasn’t confident in his observations that no one whose names weren’t broadcasted or whose names were spelled incorrectly had died, he would back out now and form a new plan. As it stood, he was so confident in his scrutiny of the deaths that he was certain there was only a sliver of a chance Kira could actually kill him without his name. So…

“I assure you, regardless of the trick I’ve just played, L is real and I am L. Now. TRY TO KILL ME!” He declared into the microphone with confidence, his voice coming out much more powerful than he suspected people were used to hearing from him. 

He didn’t pause to see if Kira would be able to kill him, although as he continued his taunting and didn’t feel like he was dying, he gained speed. “What’s wrong? Hurry up! Come on, right now! Kill me! Come on, Kira, kill me!” Still nothing, which was to be expected, but… “Can’t you do it? ” L couldn’t stop thinking about what happened with Mr. Taylor not two minutes ago. 

Kira was subtly trying to turn the tide against L and pressure him that way. If nothing else made that clear, then it was definitely Kira calling L cruel using Taylor. The fact that Kira could apparently control people before they killed them was something that L had never even considered before. It was a startling revelation and one that was freely given to him by Kira, making him wonder why the killer had gone through with it. What plan could he be feeding into by doing that? 

Kira choosing that route could mean good things for L since that meant Kira was feeling attacked (which was entirely the intention) and, more importantly, felt that the power dynamic between them was too unequal and so was attempting to balance it out. It meant Kira was afraid. However, that was both an annoying and an effective power move that might actually cause some trouble for L, especially if they were to persist in it. 

Kira exposing Taylor as a criminal was also likely only done as a PR stunt to keep the public on his side, L didn’t think Kira would have stuck to his supposed ideals if L really had appeared on the news report himself. Still...L couldn’t ignore the fact that he hadn’t proven Kira would go against his morals at a moment’s notice. L had intended to prove that Kira would kill people he believed to be working with law enforcement solely for the crime of working against them, but Kira had thrown that back in L’s face with their reversal. 

“Well, Kira, it seems that you can’t kill me after all.” L continued slowly, but his mind was torn. 

If anything, at least to other people, he’d proven that Kira would see through any deception, stick to their ideals, and only kill criminals or those who had done wrong. No matter how he knew, Kira had definitely known Taylor was a criminal when they had killed him instead of buying the trick that it was the real L. 

L couldn’t prove to them that Kira had tried to kill L just now and had simply been unable to do so. He would need to fix that, need to show people that Kira wasn’t as righteous as they liked to portray themself, but he could let the court of public opinion go for a moment. 

What he couldn’t let go of was the fact that he didn’t know the truth of the matter. “Or maybe it’s...that you won’t kill me? Is that it? I wonder if the reason I’m alive right now isn’t due to your abilities, but rather to some conscience you think you have? How noble of you, Kira. To spare my life. It’s sweet, really, but there’s a problem I’m afraid. No matter what you think, what you’re doing is evil and no amount of shallow nobility is going to balance the scales of your morality.” 

L took a small breath and then continued. “Regardless of whether you can or can’t kill me, you’ve still given me a useful hint about your identity. I must thank you for that, Kira.” 

While psychic powers were now on the table, the fact that criminals whose names weren’t correctly known didn’t die clearly indicated that Kira isn’t all-knowing. That in turn meant that the most likely explanation for how Kira knew what they did about Taylor being a criminal was either them being or being close to someone higher up in the chain of law enforcement. It was indeed a useful hint, L hadn’t truly considered before this that Kira could be that well connected. 

“Let me return the favor.” L continued smoothly. You seemed to know a great deal about Mr. Taylor and his circumstances, so stop me if you know this too. Although this was announced as a worldwide broadcast, the truth is we are only broadcasting in the Kanto region of Japan.” L smirked, wondering just how Kira was reacting to this information. At any rate, this should even their odds a little bit more. 

“I had planned to broadcast this message around the world until we found you, but it looks like that won’t be necessary. I now know where you are.” He sounded quite smug, even to himself. L was very pleased with himself, even if he wasn’t quite happy with the situation itself had turned out. 

“There’s more. The police treated your first killing as an unrelated incident, but in actuality, the first of your victims was a suspect in Shinjuku. Looking back, he was the first criminal to die of a heart attack that we could find. Furthermore, his crime was only ever reported inside Japan. I used that information to deduce this much: You are in Japan and your first victim was little more than...an experiment.”

L’s smirk widened at his next deduction. “Which means that you haven’t been killing for very long. We decided to broadcast in Kanto first, due to its large population, and luckily we found you.” 

And since Kira had injected some of their own thoughts and feelings (ignoring the question of if they were true) into their confrontation when they were controlling Taylor, L decided to reciprocate. “To be completely honest with you, I never expected you would show yourself so quickly, but...it won’t be too long now before I will be able to sentence you to death.” L hoped Kira was feeling even more threatened now, L had every intention of making good on that promise. 

“Naturally, I’m very interested in how you’ve managed to commit these murders without being present , but I don’t mind waiting a little bit longer. You can answer all of my questions when I catch you.” The voice modulator managed to cover the glee that was actually in L’s voice when he said that.

“Let’s meet again soon, Kira.” L whispered and turned off his mic. Less than a second and two keyboard taps later led to the signal for the entire tv channel being turned off too with static replacing it. 

And L was left in the silence. 

That hadn’t gone remotely how L had thought it would. He was certain the Japanese police, while not happy that Kira was indeed hiding in Japan, would be inordinately pleased with the information L had gotten from that one encounter. However, L’s mind was still furiously going through everything he had just witnessed. From the fact that Kira truly could kill someone without coming into contact with them, to their additional astounding ability to control people’s words and actions before they died, L had a thought to think about. 

And the unexpected ground Kira had managed to gain at the beginning of their confrontation rankled the detective. 

L could acknowledge he was being childish about it, but he lacked a desire to change that. What desire he did have was to kick Kira down after the leverage they’d managed to gain against him. 

He continued to sit in the darkened room lit only by the screen of his laptop and thought about it all. 

What should his next move be? 

Chapter Text

Light smirked as he leaned back in his desk chair. It had finally happened, the Lind L. Tailor broadcast.  

It hadn’t been a busy day, which had made waiting for this moment all the harder. Light had practically been a nervous wreck all day. Of course, Ryuk had been the only one who knew him well enough to actually notice. 

Now that it was over though, all he could do was wait it out and see what changed because of what he did. It wouldn't make or break anything, he figured, but there was something at stake. 

There was comparatively little risk in his plan considering what he was used to, but if this did go wrong, then he would cement into L's mind the idea that Kira wanted him dead, cement into the police's minds that they and their loved ones could be killed at a moment's notice, and overall harm his cause in many people's eyes. 

If it went as expected, though….well. He would certainly come out better than L for it.

Ryuk crawled around on the ceiling behind him, chewing on an apple that Light had tossed up there a moment ago. 

Light had briefly entertained the idea of not killing Tailor during the broadcast, but only really because he couldn’t verify the man’s crimes for himself and so he was almost flying blind on this matter. 

Thanks to L being an entitled jerk, Tailor had been arrested, tried, and convicted of his crimes without any information about him being released anywhere to the public. It was honestly rather unnerving to Light on an empathetic level as well as a legal one. He felt more than a small pang of sympathy for Tailor, whatever the man might have done to land himself on death row.

Back in his previous life, Light had heard L explain that Tailor was an inmate whose execution was scheduled for that day and that he had been arrested with the utmost secrecy, but Light at the time had been far too distracted by the fact that he had been tricked by the real L to bother himself with thinking about what the implications of those facts meant for the dead man. 

This time around, Light was far less full of himself and he liked to think that gave him a little more clarity looking at this situation than before. In the weeks leading up to when the broadcast would take place (and it did, in fact, take place at the same time as before), Light found himself thinking more and more about what Tailor had gone through and why he had gone through it. 

Maybe Tailor shouldn’t be getting so much sympathy, given his criminal status, but Light couldn’t help it. It was just…

Although the words Light had had Tailor say on live TV had been one big power play by Light, the brunette had meant what he’d said when he’d called L cruel. Yes, it was done to unsettle L and to draw the public and the police’s attention more to the terribleness of L’s actions, but one could argue that L truly was cruel, even if the detective wasn’t particularly trying to be. 

Leading up to the broadcast, the implications of what L had revealed to him in the first timeline settled now in Light’s mind in a way that they simply hadn’t before. Those implications were a doozy, but given L’s propensity towards unlawful arrests and torture, Light wasn’t necessarily surprised. 

How fair could Tailor’s imprisonment and trial really be if the information on his crimes and detainment were truly on a need-to-know basis? Utmost secrecy usually meant that not even lower-ranking law enforcement officers were privy to the information. How lawful would his conviction and execution have been in light of this information, regardless of his guilt? 

Light was also referring to a particular decision of L’s when the word cruel had popped into Light’s head. The fact that L had used Tailor as a stand-in for himself to lure out Kira had been the thing that really struck Light as cruel of L to do. It wasn’t so much that L had been using a criminal set to die, but how Tailor was being used. 

Tailor’s execution should never have been scheduled to happen on live TV, even if it wasn’t in front of the entire world as the newsperson initially claimed it was. Even though L had a concrete reason for it, he had turned that man’s death into a spectacle, an event where it could be stared at and jeered at. Probably cheered for by some, knowing the public. 

It was like they were suddenly back in the Tutor era, where people set to be executed could serve as entertainment to the populace as they died. Tailor was a person and if he had to be executed, then he should have been executed in private where his death couldn’t be made a mockery of like it was here. Instead, because L had wanted something, this man’s life and even his death were completely rerouted to serve L’s needs, disregarding the human rights violations made in the process. 

Even if Light were to ignore what he considered to be the single most disturbing thing L had done to Tailor in his quest for clues, it was psychologically tormenting, to say the least , to set Tailor up to bait Kira. What must have been going through Tailor’s mind as he was set up for a fall like that? The man was likely either coerced or outright forced to take part in this. 

What was he feeling as he sat in front of a camera, told to pretend to be someone else, and had to bait a known serial killer into ending his life? To know he could be forced to have a heart attack at any moment? How many people would be absolute basket cases after being told that they would be actively taunting a proven killer intending to get that person to kill them? All to reach someone else’s goals. Their death, a sacrifice that person was simply willing to make. 

The torment would continue, too, if Light wasn’t in Kanto or just hadn’t responded. Judging by L’s own words, Tailor would have then been forced to repeat the process of taunting an active killer into killing him over and over again, targeting different areas of Japan and then the world each time. Each broadcast taking a psychological toll that Light flinched just thinking about. The fact that Lind L. Tailor looked so stoic during his broadcast was a credit to the man, whatever he had actually been like as a person. 

Light took a dim view of it all, to say the least. 

And so he had considered not killing Tailor at all, for all the good it would have done the man, but Light had resolved to kill the man by the time the broadcast took place. Tailor would likely be executed that day or soon thereafter, so even if it felt yucky to Light to kill Tailor, hastening the man's death and saving him a good deal of torment was probably the better decision Light could make, given the circumstances. 

Once Tailor had appeared on screen, he had seen the man’s lifespan and it had convinced Light that L’s words - at least on this matter - had been true. That was a concern, too, as Light knew the detective well and the man was a liar . A huge one. 

It wouldn’t have been that major of a surprise if he had been lying about Tailor’s backstory, but what Light had seen had only corroborated it. Tailor’s lifespan had less than a day to it, more akin to hours. He had been set to be executed that day, regardless of Light’s interference with his natural lifespan. 

There had admittedly been more to Light’s thoughts about not killing Tailor. He had enough humility to admit to that. 

If he didn’t kill Tailor, then L would definitely look like an idiot. He wouldn’t be able to prove that Kira was real and he would have inconvenienced the police for this whole charade with nothing to show for it. 

Or he could kill Taylor before he was ever introduced on TV or in private after the cameras stopped rolling. That would’ve been another kind of success for Light, he would have still gotten to L and annoyed the older man….it just came with too many problems to be considered more seriously. 

For one thing, Light was trying to save as many people as he could, regardless of how anyone else standing on the outside saw it. In the end, so many crimes were prevented by Light at least appearing as a nuclear deterrent. So many people never had to suffer in the first place because criminals were too scared of Kira...so Kira had to be a real person to them. Not necessarily a god, but certainly more than an urban legend popular on social media. 

Even if it wasn’t for the same reasons as in his first life, Light still felt like he needed the world to believe that someone was watching them who would punish them where the courts might not strike the same amount of fear. 

Despite what L might be imagining, this battle wasn’t just about beating L for Light. L was important to him, so very important , but so was the life of every other human being in the world who deserved to be given equal consideration. So Light couldn’t do something he thought might end up costing many innocent lives just to make L look crazier than he knew the man could make himself look. 

Light scoffed under his breath. His love could definitely make himself look pretty immoral and nuts. 

The broadcast did bring L closer to coming for him, though, and Light wasn’t above feeling happy about that. He missed L and he absolutely couldn’t even stomach the thought of never seeing the man again, which is what he risked by spending too many big events not responding to L at all. 

Light got up from his desk, at his mother’s call of dinnertime. He waved a hand over his shoulder as he closed the door to his bedroom, promising Ryuk that he’d bring back a slice of apple pie for his friend. 

They’d been having that for dessert quite a lot lately. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light didn’t think about it again until he was once again back in his room. He was laying underneath his blanket and trying to get to sleep and then suddenly it was all he could think about. 

The L he once knew.

The L he desperately hoped hadn’t changed. 

It swarmed about in his mind, as it often did, demanding to be thought about. Light could spend hours that way, thinking of what had once been. 

Once upon a time, there had been... something... between Light and L. Besides hatred and animosity, anyway. When Light had lost his memories for the first time, it had been the first time in a long time that Light had cared for people beyond their usability to him. 

The first time he truly looked at L. 

True, the man had been presumptuous and agitating, morally tone-deaf and dominating, but...that was part of what made him so unique to Light. So irreplaceable. Light had enough morality for both of them and enough intelligence and empathy to understand where L was coming from most of the time. 

L and Light grew marginally closer, Light remembered, even though L never stopped seeing Light as an enemy to be investigated and defeated. Light was the only one who tried to understand L as he was, he thought. The only one who challenged L enough to bring the older man to heights of emotion he'd possibly never reached. 

L even started to make jokes, albeit still in his usual monotone, and he'd been the first person in a while to actually make Light laugh. 

All of the late nights spent together, all the theorizing on their case. All that time that they spent full-on living together, practically in each other's pockets. It had eventually made Light realize how close L was to being the only true friend he'd ever had and sometimes when L looked at him a particular way...Light wondered if they were only that. 

But their relationship never really progressed further than that and he wasn't sure if it would have or if they'd always be stuck in that gear of frenemies-with-romantic-tension. Light got his memories back and he never thought about it again, besides to scoff at how silly he had been without his memories. Valuing people? Ha! The thoughts of a dreamer. 

But still...there were times...in his weaker moments…

Light sat up in his bed but didn't stand up. He wasn't sure if he could fight the strong urge to pace his room if he did so. 

Things were different now, in both good and bad ways. On the one hand, L was alive, which was something to be eternally grateful for. It also gave Light the potential, just the potential, to get their relationship to a point that it had never reached before. Again, something to be very much grateful for. 

On the other hand, L didn't know him. Light knew L with the familiarity of a close friend mixed with a family member, but on L's side, he didn't even know Light existed. And that hurt. Light thought about the detective almost constantly since awakening in the past. 

In truth, L had never completely left Light’s memory even after the man’s death, but the combination of having his mind clearer and having a chance again made everything rise back up to the surface. And a lot was floating to the top, given how much Light knew L. He knew L better than anyone, he was sure. 

L was annoying. He was downright frustrating, even when Light was no longer interested in fighting against him. L thought through every situation with the lens of how it benefited him. It would be inaccurate to say he only did the things he wanted to do, but all of Light’s memories of L doing things the man truly seemed to hate doing involved him being pressured to do so. 

Despite the nature of his thoughts at the moment, Light couldn’t help but smile dopily as he thought back to his confrontation with L during the broadcast. It was the first time Light and L had ever talked in the first timeline and even now looking back on it, there had been something...magical about it. Insofar as the human world could ever leave behind its monotonous nature enough to feel ethereal, of course. 

L’s side of the conversation changed the script in response to Light’s change, but L still felt the same as before. Light was so relieved...

“I had to test it just in case, but I--I never guessed it would actually happen.”

The first words Light had ever heard L say in this or any world and it caused warmth to flush in his chest as he thought back on them. Even while computer-modulated, the breathlessness in L’s voice was still clearly noticeable. Whatever the reason, he had made L sound like that and it was a badge he wore proudly on his soul. 

L’s taunting had rankled Light in their first life together, mostly because L knew all of the right buttons to push, but by the end of their encounter, Light had been more excited than he could ever remember being in his whole life. A challenger . Someone who could make Light’s life of boredom light up like a Christmas tree and L did . He really did. 

Back then, Light had looked down on other people, and even though Light felt nothing of the sort now, it was still clear as day how he had come about his previous delusion of superiority. He was the top student in Japan, after all. Praised for everything by everyone, from his looks to his manner, to his grades. His superficial success was all the people around him thought was important and so that’s all he could recognize was important, too. 

Even as he became Kira and his own identity of “Light Yagami” became more of an act to deceive others, he never really moved away from the values he was taught when he was younger, shallow though they were. Success meant being better than everyone else, after all. And if you didn’t get the grades that you should with the intelligence that you had, then you were slacking. If you exited school with great grades but didn’t get a great job, then it was all a waste in the eyes of others, you didn’t make good on your potential. 

Light’s father had...tried to be that guiding influence for Light that informed him about morality separate from objective success, but his expectations for him got in the way. They distracted him from seeing what Light needed or wanted and kept him from truly recognizing that Light was a person that needed help sometimes. And he was around so rarely…

Light still loved his father, of course he did, but he wondered if there was anything he really knew about the man besides his strict adherence to his “pure as the driven snow” sense of justice. Maybe. Light thought to himself as he stared at his bedroom ceiling. 

Maybe it’s idealistic of me to think so with how many issues I had, but I can’t help wondering if I could have been saved from going down that road in the first place if I’d just had at least one meaningful relationship with someone. Not Sayu, who can’t seem to take much pressure emotionally before she cracks. Not Mom who seems stuck in her own world half the time, ignoring anything troubling. Not Dad, who’s gone half the time and is uncompromising and emotionally closed off the other half…

Light laid his arm across his forehead as he continued his staring. By the time I and L got close, I’d already gone batshit and lost my memories of being Kira on top of that. Maybe there was nothing that could’ve stopped me from becoming who I did, maybe...but... is it really so wrong to think that having someone, anyone, to actually ask me if I was okay would’ve helped?

Light allowed his eyes to slide closed. He had looked down on other people as being beneath him for much of his young adult life in the first timeline, that was a certainty. During the broadcast, Light had thought L would be the same as everyone else. He could even remember making a smart-ass comment about things being interesting if L had just been a little smarter...only to get the rug pulled out from under him immediately afterward when he was forced to realize that L had been smarter.

Because you see, L was unlike any person Light had ever met and, no, it wasn’t just his intelligence that made Light think so. He had met Near, after all. Heck, he had dealt with all of L’s “successors” in varying degrees after his death. If it was all about L’s intelligence, two misunderstood geniuses finding companionship in each other, then it wasn’t like L was the only one of his kind. 

No, it wasn’t just L’s intelligence, it was...well, L. Everything about him. Was it possible to say that you fell in love with someone simply because they were themselves? Because L was L. He was annoying and aggressive, demanding and tone-deaf. Yet, also strangely understood people and what made them tick. He lacked social skills and had all sorts of mannerisms that Light had never seen anywhere else; they were stupid and cute and funny and effective. L's little things were all of those and more. 

When Light had met L for the first time ever, it had all annoyed him. Someone so far from the social norms that Light had been taught to value, that Light found it outright offensive. He couldn’t appreciate L for who he was until he’d lost his memory of being Kira and even then, their relationship was so tense and antagonistic that nothing could ever come of it until L loosened up and then Light got his memories back and…

Well.

Light huffed and flopped around on his bed a little, trying to find a comfortable position. His recollections were getting jumbled and confused and the different timelines weren’t helping anything! Everything about Light and L’s relationship was complicated and probably always would be. 

L was the most frustrating man Light had ever met and even when Light had no longer been capable of real love, L had still been able to get a rise out of him, inspiring more emotion than anyone else ever had. He reached into the depths of Light and pulled, trying to pull the monster out, and Light found himself clinging to the man in their fight for superiority. 

But in some of the quieter moments...before Light had regained his memory...maybe not all of the emotions L had inspired from Light had been from his antagonism. If there had been times when Light had looked at L as the man was sitting hunched over in his chair or staring wide-eyed at someone and strangely thought the actions were cute? 

If Light had ever asked L to turn the light on the computer down when he was trying to sleep and felt somehow honored when the man actually did? If maybe L actually said a joke in his monotone that made Light laugh and he found himself amazed by the man more than he would ever let the jerk know? 

Well then, he was only strong enough to admit to them now. 

And to act on them. 

This time wouldn’t be like last time and he would show L that he would have to step up his game if he thought he could handle both Kira and Light this time. 

And Light…

...he hoped L would show Light that he wasn’t wrong to love him.

Chapter Text

“Nice to see you again, Light!” The man behind the reception desk greeted, happily. Funai Tsutomu, the name above his head read. 

“Mr. Tsutomu, nice to see you again, too.” Light gave a close-eyed smile. The man was always ecstatic to talk to people, maybe that was why he worked the front desk so often. At any rate, Light had been seeing a lot of him since the partial-teenager had started popping up around the precinct. 

“What’d you bring this time?” The officer smiled, pushing the visitor sign-in sheet across the desk towards him. 

“Just sandwiches, this time.” Light laughed lightly, shaking the bento box he held in his hand. 

“Aww.” Mr. Tsutomu whined playfully. “No dessert this time?” 

“I thought about it.” Light admitted. “But I don’t think Dad would appreciate being on a sugar high every single day.” Behind him, Ryuk was doing his usual hover thing. 

“Well, you can go on up at any time.” The officer said, pleasantly. “I’m sure your father will be glad to see you but are you really sure you don’t want to try helping with the Kira Investigation? With how well you’ve done in cases before, I’m sure you’d be a great help.” He encouraged him. 

Light gave a soft chuckle. “Maybe, but I don’t think I’d like to get involved with this one. It’s serious, so I’ll leave it to the professionals. Besides, I’ve been rethinking lately about what I want in life.” He said this lightly, belying the seriousness of their meaning. He gave a polite nod to the officer after that and breezed further into the building, Ryuk hot on his heels. 

Once they were in the empty hallway and out of earshot, Ryuk started talking. “Do you think your dad’s going to get annoyed with you persistently showing up to his workplace nearly every day?” 

“I don’t know.” Light replied back thoughtfully, hanging his head towards the ground as he talked so that the security cameras wouldn’t see him talking to himself. “As long as he doesn’t try to stop me from coming here altogether, then it should be fine.”

It would be, too. Annoying his dad wouldn’t do Light any favors, but he could deal with it as long as it didn’t mess with his current plans. This was the third week now of almost daily visits to the police precinct. He knew he wouldn’t be able to keep coming up with random reasons why he was always around, so he decided from the beginning that he would frame it as wanting to take care of his Dad and make sure the man was okay because of the Kira Case. His Dad had initially insisted that Light didn’t need to check on him, but Light could out stubborn the man, and Soichiro had quickly taken to letting his son do what he wanted. 

Light took advantage of it, coming nearly every day and bringing his Dad any number of things, from a change of clothes to food to letters written by Sayu telling him about her day (Light’s idea). Even though the things he brought were helpful, Light didn’t try to hide the fact that they were mostly excuses to go to the precinct. 

He let them think they knew the reasons why. 

Light gave the briefest of knocks as he got to his dad’s office and went in. Soichiro’s eyes flicked up to the door, but he relaxed immediately when he saw that it was Light. “Ah, Light. I see you’re back again.” He said, by way of greeting. 

“Yeah, I’m back.” Light smiled and came over to the desk, placing the bento box on it when he got close enough. “I brought sandwiches this time, you’re probably hungry.” 

Like usual, his dad seemed mildly disinterested in what Light was doing and like usual, Light wasn’t sure if it was because he was so busy with work or because he didn’t actually care very much about his activities. That was fine, though. Getting his dad’s approval wasn’t part of his plan. Even if it did make him feel a little…Light mentally shook himself. 

His father had always been more dedicated to his work than his own family, Light knew this. At the end of the day, he was a good man but a lackluster parental figure. “How’s the case going, dad?” 

His dad sighed wearily and steepled his fingers. “Nothing new, as of yet, but L seems to have another one of his secret plans in progress.” His tone got across exactly what he felt about L’s secrecy. “I’m sorry, I can’t say more.” 

Light and his father had fallen into a routine these last several weeks where Light would deliver what he had, ask his father a vague question about how things were going, and Soichiro would give him a comfortably vague answer. It was honestly more than they’d talked in the last year. 

Light left the office shortly after that to let his dad get back to work, as usual, and lingered in the front area of the precinct for a while to chat with the officer at the front before walking home with Ryuk.

“What if your plan doesn’t work?” Ryuk asked, towering over the teen as they took the usual route home. "It's tomorrow, isn't it?" 

“Then it doesn’t work.” Light shrugged dismissively. They could talk more freely here since they rarely passed anyone this way. “It'll be a huge waste, but not the worst thing in the world. Why? Do you think it’ll fail?” Ryuk wasn’t dumb, so if Ryuk thought there might be an issue, then he wanted to hear it, although Light was pretty confident that if Ryuk had noticed any serious problems when Light was planning this, he would have said something earlier. 

“I don’t think it’ll fail exactly,” Ryuk replied. “It's very smart actually and doesn't leave much room for things to go wrong. It’s just that you never know with humans. They might not do what you want them to.”   

“I get it.” Light said. “The world is a chaotic place. You can guess what people will do and most of the time you’re right, but then they’ll do something crazy right out of nowhere.” 

“Damn right.” Ryuk agreed, sensibly. 

That was one of the reasons why Ryuk spent most of his time floating around inside the police station these days. He was both keeping an eye on the meetings between L and the police and watching for variability. They knew the event happened somewhere around this time so Ryuk just had to keep watch until it happened and inform Light. 

Light had already sent “it” and if everything went according to plan, the real fun would begin. 

He could hardly wait!

~ 🅚 ~

Naomi stepped out of the cold into the Japanese police station, her hair being whipped into her face by the wind. She was here now. 

Her hands clenched into fists at her sides as he tried to calm her heartbeat. She needed to do this, she told herself. Kira was killing people and she had information that could stop them! 

Even if she wasn’t an FBI agent anymore, as Raye had reminded her plenty of times, she still felt the need to do her job. Besides, with her fiance partially investigating some of the suspects, in this case, taking action here might just save him as well and for that, Noami was willing to do anything. 

Officially, Naomi had followed her fiance to Japan to introduce him to her parents while they were there. However, in all honestly, she was here mostly because of the Kira case. The FBI agent in her wanted to investigate, even though she was retired now, it itched at her to do so. Plus, her fiance was now involved and she would be lying if she said she wasn’t worried about his safety. 

Raye, unfortunately, picked up on this and she found herself subjected to more than a few serious talks with him about what she was not a part of anymore and what she would not be doing while they were in Japan. There was even a short time when he considered not bringing her to Japan with him on his mission until she convinced him that she would be able to control her impulses on not get involved. She’d meant it at the time, too. 

That lasted all of about a week, but she wasn’t nosing around on her own this time, she was actually commissioned to help! Not by anyone official, she’d admit. She honestly didn’t know who’d contacted her, but it was the only push she’d needed. 

It started out like this: L himself had contacted the US government and specifically asked if they could send a number of investigators over to investigate the Japanese police and anyone tied to them. Naomi and her fiance had decided to stay in a hotel room when they got to Japan. The first week or so was pretty relaxed in activity, even though Naomi found herself unavoidably anxious. 

Kira was dangerous and her fiance wasn’t taking it as seriously as she really thought he should, even as he did his job well. She kept her concerns to herself though, she didn’t want to worry him and she thought he would probably tell her she was being silly, anyway. 

Still, even if nothing had happened yet and it looked like nothing would, she couldn’t help but be ambivalent about this case. So when she opened up her email and saw a new message from an unknown sender, her FBI instincts reared up. The title of the message simply stated that it was both about the Kira Case and urgent. 

She didn’t know much about computer science so she couldn’t test if it was safe to open herself. Instead, she sent it to an old colleague of hers asking for a favor and had her check it out. Her friend got back to her in record time with the information that there seemed to be nothing malicious attached to the email and it was safe to open. So, taking a fortifying breath, she did so. 

And what was in it was Earth-shattering.

The email was comparatively short in contrast to the wealth of information it presented. The message read as such: 

Dear Ms. Misora. 

I hope you’re well. I’ve come to contact you today because I have stumbled upon some information regarding the Kira case that I believe to be of the utmost importance and I didn’t know anyone else I could relay it to who would take it seriously besides yourself. 

I’ve heard that you are/were one of the best the FBI has to offer and your track record is very impressive. Please listen to what I have to say as I hope it could help the Japanese Police’s efforts to stop Kira. 

I believe that Kira can control the actions of those he kills before they die in more detail than anyone has suspected and that he can in fact kill in several ways, not just with heart attacks. 

I know this likely sounds baseless, but I have come to this realization by looking at some of Kira’s most recent acts. 

Recently, two criminals have died suspiciously and I believe this unintentionally shows Kira’s true abilities. One criminal, Viktor Antonov, has recently died of the flu and no one has connected it to Kira, but I think this strange. With Kira killing so many criminals, I find it strange that someone in Russia who just happened to be a criminal also just happened to die of a simple illness, one that their file says they were vaccinated for. I think that Kira, for whatever reason, wanted to keep this murder a secret and so used their abilities to kill them in a way other than a heart attack, like illness.

Another criminal, Jule Richards, died of a heart attack but engaged in strange behavior before they died. I’ve never heard of a mafia member clearly laying out physical evidence proving illegal dealings with a dirty cop before their death, have you? I think Kira was controlling him to do this in order to get the officer convicted. This shows an unprecedented control of someone's actions, like a script in a play. While Kira showed that they could control someone's words right before their death, these are very controlled actions and the strange actions started taking place nearly twenty four hours before their death. This indicates not only more control, but that Kira may be able to control someone's actions for a day or even days before their death instead of mere moments. Please take this seriously and please take it to the proper authorities. L, in this case. If I am right, this could be big, very big. 

I recommend the police get this information on the 30th in the evening. I can’t say why, but I believe this to be the most advantageous time.

Signed, A Friend. 

The letter was done and Naomi was left staring in shock at her computer. 

Noami had paused at the writer’s assertions on Kira’s capabilities, stunned by what she had read. Going further, they justified their point to her and why they thought what they did and she had to agree that the logic checks out. It really did seem like something that Kira could be capable of, given the evidence presented. 

And if…

And if it did turn out to be true and Kira truly was capable of this, that information would be invaluable to the task force investigating Kira. It would be an enormous help and could even help lead to Kira’s capture! 

Noami felt herself getting excited and had to remind herself to calm down. She took a breath. She couldn’t allow herself to become too excited, she needed to evaluate how to handle this appropriately. She would have to tell her fiance. He could take it to his boss who would give the information to L and they could make good progress in the Kira case! So she did. 

Except...that’s not what happened. 

“Honey, that’s ridiculous. You’re taking someone’s word for it that you don’t even know, they could be anyone.”

But good information can come from anywhere, all of her previous experience told her that. Besides, she had a feeling that this person wasn’t just anyone, they knew too much. Information on the criminal who died of the flu was readily available to anyone online, she’d checked, but no one who didn’t have government connections should have known about the criminal who’d died after exhibiting strange behavior. 

As well as that, they’d heard about her and managed to get her contact information, and trusted her enough to do something with the insights they gave her. All of this heavily implied that they were in the FBI and that made even more sense why they would want to keep their identity a secret. 

Besides...this person...she wasn’t sure what it was exactly, but they reminded her a little of L. She knew it wasn’t him, of course, but they seemed so much like him that she couldn’t help but want to trust this person.

“Look, Dear, we both know you used to be one of the best FBI agents there were.”

If they both knew that, then why wasn’t he taking her thoughts on this seriously?

“But now you’re just my fiance, Noami, so drop it!” 

But she couldn’t. Because she knew she was right. Raye wouldn’t believe her, though, and wouldn’t hear any more about it, which was what brought her here to the Japanese police department. She had to deal with this on her own. 

She walked into the police department on that cold day with her shoulders slumped but her head held high. This day was the 30th of December, three days after she had gotten the mysterious email. After realizing that she would have to come to the station herself to deal with this because of her unwilling fiance, Noami decided to go at the day and time that the email had asked her to. 

The day was bitterly cold and she sighed in relief as she entered the drastically warmer building. Her eyes drifted around the department entrance, but there were very few people there; one officer at the front desk and a teenaged boy talking cheerfully to him. Good, that was good. The fewer people around, the less danger there was. 

As she approached the desk, both the officer and the teenager stopped talking and turned to look at her. The teenager, in particular, looked at her with wide eyes. She briefly wondered why that was, but considering he was a teenage boy and she was a rather attractive older woman, she supposed it could have been just that simple. She quickly turned her attention to the officer and didn’t bother with the boy again. 

“Hello. May I please speak to someone on the Kira Taskforce?” Naomi didn’t waste any time getting to the meat of why she was here. 

“I’m sorry, Ma’am, but they are very busy people. If you have information, we would be happy to write it down and give it to them later.” The man said pleasantly but firmly. 

“No, that won’t work.” Naomi asserted. “I have to speak to someone directly on the task force, it’s urgent!” 

“I’m sorry,” The man said. “Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t help you see them. No one is at the task force office at the moment and none of them are answering their phones. I promise that if you leave the information to us, it will get back to them safely.” He promised. 

“Please.” Naomi felt herself growing desperate. Couldn’t there be just one person who would listen to her? “I have incredibly important information for the Kira case!”

“...important information?” A soft voice from beside her said, causing Naomi’s head to instinctively jerk to the side. It was the young teenager who was still standing at the desk and was now looking at her with wide brown eyes. “You have important information for my father?”

Naomi’s brain took a second to catch up after the boy’s startling insertion into the conversation, but when it did… “Your father?” She repeated, in question. Her eyes fixed on him now. 

“Ah, Light! You shouldn’t be telling people that!” The desk officer said in a panic, making Naomi wonder even more what that comment was supposed to mean. 

“I think it’s alright, Mr. Tsutomu,” The boy said to the officer, still maintaining a quiet and peaceful demeanor. “I think it might be a good thing to tell her this.” 

“What do you mean, Light?” The officer - Mr. Tsutomu - asked him, eyes darting to her uncertainly. 

“Well…I could be wrong, but I think the real reason she doesn’t want to give you the information is that no one knows who Kira is or what kind of connections they have. So far Kira has shown at least some ability to get confidential information, so you might be able to understand why she wouldn’t feel comfortable giving this information to anyone outside of the task force, even an officer.” 

The boy - Light - gave a soft smile to the officer that felt like it was asking the officer to try and understand her better and it seemed to work. The officer’s shoulders relaxed just a little, although there was still some tension in them. 

Then Light turned back to her and gave her a secret little smile, playful. “Well, am I right?” 

She stared at him for a few seconds, unsure what to do but as he continued to look at her, she found herself nodding in agreement. She immediately wondered if she had done the right thing by acknowledging it, but that got swept away as the boy smiled brightly at her. Excited. She fought the instinctual urge to fight back. 

“I knew it.” He said, excitedly. “You’re more careful than most. To me, that’s as good a reason as any to help you.” 

“Are you sure about this, Light?” The desk officer asked, still sounding a little careful but not as worried as before Light had explained his thoughts. 

“I’m sure.” Light said brightly, turning to him before turning back to her. “My name is Light Yagami, my father is Soichiro Yagami, and the officer in charge of the Kira Case.” 

Naomi’s eyes popped open at the information presented to her. Could it be…? Could this really be it? Someone with connections who would finally listen to her? Now it made sense why the officer was hesitant for Light to mention his father. 

She snapped out of her thoughts and hurried to introduce herself. “My name is Shoko Maki. Would you possibly know where your father is? I need to get in contact with him.” She pressed. 

“I’m sorry, Ms. Maki, but I don’t know where Dad is. I was just told by Mr. Tsutomu that he’s out.” Against her will, Naomi found herself beginning to droop, but she barely had time to feel down before the boy spoke to lift her back up again. 

“But I’m pretty sure I can get in contact with him if you can stand to hang around with me a bit longer. It’ll require you to trust me and my dad though, I hope that won’t be a problem.” He gave a lighthearted laugh, his eyes closed and face the most angelic Naomi had ever seen on a person. It helped her to relax. 

“I-Yes, that would be very helpful. Thank you so much.” Naomi bowed deeply to him. 

“It’s really alright.” Light assured her. “His cell phone is off, but I have a pager for him for emergencies. I’ll page him and see if I can get him to turn on his phone and see what happens. I hope you understand that I can’t just hand over my phone to a stranger, but I’ll do my best to try to get him to meet with you. We should probably stay here until he calls.” 

Naomi felt herself buzzing with excitement. This could be it! This was amazing, better than she could have hoped for! She nodded in agreement and the two went over to sit in a couple of chairs in a corner of the room while Light reached into his pocket to remove his phone and quickly typed something in before putting it back in his pocket and waiting. 

They sat waiting in silence for maybe only five seconds before Light leaned closer to her and said something that made her heart stutter in her chest. 

“Ms. Maki, I know you gave me a fake name.” 

“W-What?” Naomi said, looking at him with wide eyes and maybe the slightest amount of fear. 

“I know you gave me a fake name.” Light repeated. He said this sternly but his features looked neither angry nor intimidating. A better word would be...steady. 

If Naomi had thought about denying it, that thought would have fled immediately with just how steadily he was looking at her and how serious he was. He knew and she wouldn’t do them both the disservice of telling him an obvious lie. 

“That’s right, I did.” She replied, collecting herself. “I hope you can understand why. How did you know?” 

Light nodded, serenely. “I do understand, that’s how I knew. Like I said before, I think you’re trustworthy because of how careful you are and a careful person wouldn’t start giving their name out all over the place with a killer on the loose who needs exactly that to kill. It would be idiotic and you are not that.” He stated this simply like it was as obvious as the color of the sky, but having been doubted so often lately, Naomi had to take a shaky breath at hearing it. 

“Thank you.” That was all Naomi could say. 

Light smiled warmly at her before it dimmed slightly. “I understand, but Ms. Maki, it’s like I said before, if this is going to work, you need to be able to trust me and my dad. I know it’s unreasonable to ask you to trust me so soon after meeting me, especially since you have sensitive information about the Kira Case, but we might run into trouble if you can’t.”

His big brown eyes looked up at her pleadingly and reluctantly, she found herself moved by it. “I,” Light continued, quietly. “Won’t force you to reveal your true name in order to assist you if you’re not comfortable with it. I will help you no matter what, so I don’t want you to reveal your name because you feel you have to. I want you to reveal your name because you want to take the first step towards trusting me like I’m doing with you.” He says this with conviction, his eyes boring into her own, radiating a kind of honesty she rarely saw in people. “I’m not going to force you, but I’m hoping you will.” He then leaned back and pulled out his phone, proceeding to stare at it as it remained silent. Just as he did, it began to ring and he moved to answer it. 

Naomi quickly made a decision. “Noami Misora.” She said, right before Light answered the phone. 

“Excuse me?” He said, looking back at her with a startled look on his face. 

Something in the expression, his sheer surprise maybe, convinced her that she should do it. “My real name, it’s Naomi Misora.” She smiled tightly. 

He looked at her with wide eyes and said, “Thank you, Ms. Misora.” And answered the call. “Hey, Dad. Yeah, I figured you’d be busy. No, I’m fine, I’m not hurt, but look, Dad-It is an emergency of a sort. Dad, listen, there’s a woman here at the station who’s insisting that she meet with someone on the investigation team. No, she says that she has important information to share and she can’t talk to anyone else.” 

Naomi watched as the boy talked his father into meeting with her, his father who sounded dismissive from Light’s end of the conversation. She quickly tapped his shoulder. 

“Hold on.” Light said into the phone and turned to her. 

“Tell him I want to speak with L directly.” She offered. “I’ve worked with him before on a case, he might remember me and if he does, he might agree to meet with me.” This could help him convince his father. 

Really? Light mouthed to her and when she nodded, he excitedly smiled and turned back to the phone. “Could you ask L if he would meet with her? She says she’s worked with him before, he should remember her. Her name is Naomi Misora.”

Light waited quietly for a little bit and then began to insist, “Please, Dad. A good detective should always be open-minded and besides, I’m worried about leaving her alone. If her information is as important as she says it is or even if it isn’t, it makes her a target for Kira or a Kira sympathizer. I refuse to leave her alone until she gets a meeting with L, Dad.” Light said sternly, unwavering, and Naomi felt touched that he was going to bat for her like this. 

She really was lucky to meet Light Yagami like this. 

“Just ask L and see what he says, please.” Light begged and leaned forward as he waited in silence while something happened on the other end of the line. Nearly a minute passed before Light suddenly stood up straight again and listened to something. Then he smiled, brightly. “You want me to...okay, I’ll do that. Yeah, I wouldn’t feel good about doing it otherwise. That’s the hotel with the black awning, right? Okay, we’ll be there in ten minutes.” Then he hung up. 

“My dad says L’s agreed to meet with you.” Light grinned at her and she felt her lips turning upwards, too. “Apparently, L is meeting with the Kira Taskforce personally at a nearby hotel. I know the one and Dad wants me to bring you there to meet L now.” His smile turned a little softer as he looked at her. “I hope you feel okay with me walking you there. Neither my dad nor I feel comfortable letting you walk there alone where you could be attacked by someone trying to silence you. You won’t mind the company?”

Naomi was actually surprised by how alright she was with that. It came as a surprise to her just how much she already trusted this boy. Then again, how could she not? He had come to her aid when no one else did and he was so sweet, too. He’d gone above and beyond to try and get her help even apparently going up against her father to do it. How could she say anything else but…

“I would be happy to walk with you.” She smiled, her eyes alight with hope. 

She felt safer already. 

Light gave another small laugh and stood up from his chair, holding his hand out to her. “Well then, let’s get going. We should get there as soon as possible.” 

“Yeah, let’s go.” She smiled, taking his hand.

Chapter Text

Ryuk flew behind Light as his friend and the woman went on their way. He was trying not to bug Light while he was talking with this Naomi woman, but it was all he could do to stop himself from cackling madly the entire walk, not that the walk was that long. 

After all, Light-o’s plan was truly brilliant...and interesting. So. Very. Interesting. 

Light had told him outright when they were alone that he couldn’t cling to the idea that things would happen the exact same way as they had in the previous timeline. Things would change, Ryuk agreed, and if he wanted anything specific to happen, he would have to make it happen. 

And he did. 

What Light wanted to happen, apparently, was the incident where he ran into Naomi Misora at the police station. “Don’t you see, Ryuk?” Light had asked, smiling up at him in excitement. “It could be a perfect opportunity this time around if I just work it the right way!” 

“Yeah? And how’s that?” Ryuk asked curiously, remembering how stressed Light had been about it the first time. 

Light’s smile widened. “Because her appearance puts Kira in a bad position.” At Ryuk’s look of befuddlement, he gave a soft laugh and continued on. “Ms. Misora showing up at the police station the way she did puts a lot of pressure on Kira to stop her, anyone could see that. Not only is she coming out with some dangerous theories, but those theories are also true and that would give L an edge if he were to figure that out.”

“And then,” Light said, leaning forward in his desk chair. “She refuses to talk to anyone who isn’t on the Kira Investigation and is actively hoping to speak to L directly .” He leaned back in his chair. “It’s a nightmare for Kira and if he has any self-preservation instincts at all, Kira can’t let her pass this information on...or live any longer, really. He absolutely cannot help her. ” Light laughed. “And that’s exactly what I’m going to do.” 

“Hold on, hold on.” Ryuk held up a clawed hand. “I knew you probably wouldn’t kill her since you seem to care so much about what happens to humans, but what’s this now about actively helping her?” 

“It’s exactly as I said, Ryuk.” Light replied, brightly. “Kira has too much to lose with Noami and the last thing Kira should be doing is helping her. It defies all reason, it defies all logic , and that’s exactly what makes it such a great cover for me and a way to drive L mad!” 

Light let out a small laugh that Ryuk thought might actually be a giggle. “I killed Naomi last time because she trusted me and couldn’t get to the officers on the Kira Taskforce. If I instead helped her, personally connecting her to my dad and even making sure she’s safe until she gets to meet him, then how could anyone - even L - argue that I’m Kira? 

Especially if I manage to get her real name and be left alone with her, like last time? That would give me every motive and every opportunity to do it and the fact that she came out of her meeting with me should prove my innocence to everyone but L.” 

Ryuk cackled lightly. “Oh, I get it. You’re going to do something that no normal human being in your situation would do and because you don’t fear death and know almost everything there is to know about your opponents, you aren’t really incurring any risk.” 

“Just that.” Light agreed. “The trouble is getting the event to occur. In the original timeline, I killed her fiance, Raye Penber, and that was what caused it. The way that I got Penber’s name made her suspicious that I could kill in more ways than a heart attack while controlling someone’s actions before their death and his killing of her fiance gave her a personal stake in taking me down.” 

Light looked up at Ryuk with heat in his eyes. “But I am not doing that again, to either of them. So what do I do? Well...I need to cause something like that scene to happen again, as close to it as I can manage. It’ll be some trouble, but getting one over on L used to be a lot harder.” Light smirked. 

“Of course, this whole thing is one big case of the domino effect. The FBI was only in Japan investigating the police because I got information that only the police would’ve known. I kill Agent Penber and that causes the Naomi Misora Incident, as well as the Video Cameras In My House Incident. 

Because I killed an FBI Agent just for investigating me, that also caused most of the officers assigned to the case to walk and the rest to demand to meet L in person, which is the only reason that no one from the Taskforce was there to meet Misora. I just happened to be there by chance and got an opportunity.” Light said, thoughtfully. 

“So how’re you going to do it?” Ryuk pressed. Light laughed and told him.

It all started with Light killing off those two criminals, breaking his modus operandi for the first time that Ryuk could see. Without the slaying of her fiance, there was no guarantee whatsoever that Naomi would come to the same conclusions as she had before, especially since Light had been faithfully killing criminals with heart attacks only. 

And if she didn’t then even if she still went to the police station, there would be no dangerous knowledge that would make her a threat to Kira. So the first step was to make sure she had this information, by being the one to give it to her. Light had tossed around the idea of introducing himself to Noami and telling her his ideas but ultimately decided to go the route of an anonymous email. He knew he could send one without the average person being able to trace it back to him. 

He could give her a tip-off with the information he’d gathered, playing the part of someone who didn’t have enough sway to bring it to the attention of the right authorities, but he needed a reason for why he had come to these conclusions to make it convincing and he couldn’t expect her to take his letter seriously without something to back it up. 

That was where the two criminals he’d chosen came in. Light could not and would not do what he had done to Raye Penbar, even if he didn’t kill him, so he would use two criminals from his list to achieve the same effect. Light had a running list of criminals who he had investigated and two jumped out at him as being perfect for this if he proceeded carefully. 

To give himself proof for believing that Kira could kill in ways other than a heart attack, he had a Russian criminal die under circumstances that most trained individuals would think suspicious. The criminal had already pleaded guilty and been convicted and he died in prison from the flu, even after getting medical help for it and already having been vaccinated for it. 

Naturally, half of that information was only available to Light because he hacked the information, but someone reasonably high in any country’s law enforcement would be able to access the databases that had this information. If Miss Misora thought about this and took it as an indication that her informant was with law enforcement, Light thought it was all the better.

No average cop or government official would tie that death to Kira though, but a particularly enterprising and open-minded individual might. That was all he needed for that one. 

For the proof that he could control people’s actions before they died, Light had just the two people in mind. During one of his investigations into unprosecuted criminals, Light asked Ryuk to keep an eye on this one officer in America who had raised some red flags for him. There had been some weird occurrences of a career criminal organization routinely having their members acquitted due to lack of evidence, but the same officer kept appearing in each of the investigations. 

Thanks to Ryuk’s help spying on the officer, Light was able to determine for certain that the officer was crooked and was getting paid off to look the other way. Light had been planning on doing something about this already and this gave him the perfect opportunity. Light-o insisted that he wouldn’t kill a criminal unless they had done a serious crime befitting such a punishment, such as rape or murder, or if he believed that the criminal was about to commit one of these crimes. 

The leader of this crime group that the officer was affiliated with had certainly done these crimes (the rap sheet practically wrote itself), but the officer seemed only to be guilty of this one thing. He couldn’t kill him as Kira, it wasn’t proportional to the crime and even if it was, Light was especially wary about killing police officers. Only the most violent offenders that owned a badge seemed to go into Light’s death note, the ones that made him the most angry. 

That’s why this was perfect. 

Light killed the organization leader using the death note and controlled him to lay out all the evidence of the crooked cop’s dirty dealings (well more than the department would need to prosecute) and then had him die of a heart attack right after calling the police and telling them his address. 

Unlike with the previous criminal, this death would obviously be attributed to Kira but the piece of evidence overlooked, in this case, would be the strange behavior. Again, only an enterprising individual would feel comfortable drawing conclusions from that. Together, they gave him the reasoning needed to give the information to Ms. Misora without sounding like Kira himself and getting her hackles raised. 

Now, onto the more difficult part of the plan. Since the original timeline of events that got the FBI into Japan and the Japanese Police into L’s hotel room had been shot to hell, Light needed to think carefully on how to get them to happen again. Getting the FBI into Japan to investigate the Japanese Police turned out to be the easy part compared to getting most of the police officers to abandon ship and recreate the circumstances that led to the police station being empty on that day that Ms. Naomi had visited. 

After all, L may have always been waiting for the police force to get whittled down to only a small group of reasonably trustworthy individuals, but getting him to do that on a predictable schedule while changing everything that had led up to it was something else entirely. 

Well before the event he was setting up, Light started waging war online. In his previous life, he had trolled the forums in glee, seeing all of the anonymous Kira supporters, but hadn’t interacted with any of them. 

Now, he was one of them. 

Creating multiple fake and untraceable accounts, he pretended to be a Kira supporter and stoked the fires of the actual Kira supporters, making them bolder and more sure of themselves. A few well-placed comments was all it took for some of the more bold supporters to start raising money to make a certain product...Kira pins. 

Light hadn’t expected many people to wear them, but it only took a handful of individuals doing so to make the news. Light bought one in cash who promised an anonymous transaction and held onto it. Once it got to be around the right time, Light had Ryuk drop the pin in the room being used for the Kira investigation. As planned, Ryuk did this right in the middle of a meeting and dropped the pin without anyone noticing but in a spot right by the door that would be noticed immediately. 

This served to reinforce the idea that someone in the police department was on Kira’s side and may even be passing on information to him in two ways. One, the very fact that the pin was dropped in the interior of the police station, in a room that only people involved with the Kira investigation entered. Two, having it be noticed immediately once people tried to leave the room (which they did) meant that L was given a definitive timeline for when the pin had been dropped. If people notice it immediately trying to leave, then they can be certain they would have noticed it coming in, which would of course indicate to L that only one of the people currently in the room could have been the owner. 

This easily incited the incident in question. Ryuk had kept an eye on L, making sure that L was making the decisions Light wanted him to. Light suspected he wouldn’t have much time to get L to invite over the investigators after the FBI got there before Raye Penbar started investigating, the FBI agents probably wouldn’t take long to get settled. 

So immediately after Ryuk informed Light that L had made the request to the U.S. government, Light started working on his father. Light began visiting the police station, knowing that even if L would later find this suspicious when Light finally made it onto his radar, he wouldn’t be able to convince anyone that it made Light look guilty. 

Light visited the station for the first time since the Kira Investigation had started almost two weeks after the Kira pin was found, so absolutely no one could argue he had been the one to drop it or even had contact with it. There weren’t going to be fingerprints on it, anyway, since Light had cleaned it off before handing it over to Ryuk to plant and Shinigami didn’t have fingerprints. 

If Light were to be asked later, he would insist that the thing that got him to start visiting his father religiously at the police station seemingly out of nowhere was his father coming home on the night that the Kira pin was found. Obviously, his dad didn’t tell Light that anything of the sort had happened, but Ryuk had seen the whole affair and Soichiro was visibly tired and stressed. 

Given the fact that the whole room full of officers had seen someone pick up a Kira pin off the floor of their restricted investigation room and the ensuing chaos of what that implied, it was pretty much expected (or so Light had informed Ryuk) that Soichiro would be home that night. Thus began Light’s slow game of working his dad around to Light’s view of things while making himself a common fixture in the police station.

From that family dinner onward, Light subtly mentioned things that would get the man to question if the investigation could move forward without L’s explicit trust. Light knew his dad. Light wasn’t going to be able to make him threaten to leave the investigation or make him believe that L couldn’t be trusted, so he didn’t try. 

What Light could do was begin to make his dad see that the division between L and the police would only harm the investigation and that every single day that passed with the exchange of information between them being so stilted, Kira got another victory. 

Light wasn’t sure how much his father would listen to him (how much his father ever listened to him), but Soichiro was very clearly proud of his “genius” son and had let Light help on a good amount of cases in the past, so Light knew going in that his words would have some sway over his dad if their influence was allowed to pile up over time and if he was careful about not overstepping as he did so. When the FBI got to Japan, Ryuk was one of the first to know and he loyally informed Light shortly after. 

Then when Light felt the moment was right, he anonymously sent a tip to his father’s computer that L had commissioned the FBI to investigate the Japanese Police, making sure to do this shortly before the FBI agents were expected to arrive so that even if L chose to no longer have them investigate the police, he wouldn’t be able to stop them from coming to Japan at all and Ms. Misora would still arrive. 

Light had also sent the email he drafted to Ms. Misora a few days before he sent his father the tip, and put in a part where he asked her to go to the police station on the day he would send the tip to his dad’s computer and to do so in the evening, giving his father enough time to mull over the information and confront L with it. Soichiro did what Light hoped he would and immediately confronted L with this tip, asking him if it was true, all of this happening in front of his men and Ryuk. 

Light had been making plans for what he would do if he couldn’t engineer the right circumstances that made the police department empty of anyone directly involved with the investigation. “After all,” Light had said. “I’m trying to get a really specific thing to happen. If I can’t get it right, I need a passable backup plan.”

It involved sending a follow-up letter to Ms. Misora, asking her to meet with him personally instead, nearby the police station, and then revealing himself as both her informant and the son of the police chief. It wouldn’t be as good as his initial plan, but it would still work well and he would still be in a position to greatly help her and prove he couldn’t be Kira (to everyone but L). 

He needn’t have worried. The police officers were enraged and combined with the stress of finding the Kira pin, some officers immediately resigned, prompting Soichiro to give everyone in the room the option to leave. Barring one additional man that Light is pretty sure didn’t join the investigation until later, all of the same people stayed behind. Which was great! But if L didn’t make the same offer as before, then it wouldn’t matter, anyway. 

At this point, Light was visibly excited and nervous. It all came down to this, after all. Ryuk faithfully kept watch over the proceedings, looking to see if the investigators will be asked to go to L’s hotel, while Light waited to hear from him. It was Ryuk’s job to tell him if or when the Kira Taskforce leaves the station and if Naomi Misora shows up early. If she was going to show up at all was something Light was going to have to find out for himself. 

When Ryuk came back to Light, telling him that it had actually happened and the investigators were gone, Light let out a large breath and found his excuse for the day to visit his father who he knew wasn’t going to be at the station. He just hoped the person he was actually looking for would be. 

He knew Ms. Misora would do something with the information he gave her, he just wasn’t sure if she would show up on the day and during the time period he suggested. At the very least, though, he knew she was going to get involved now. From what he’d seen of her, he judged her to be a proactive individual who found it difficult to stand on the sidelines. He hadn’t had much interaction with Raye Penbar, but the man’s stereotypical responses to things in the last timeline indicated him to be a good man but curiously inflexible. 

Light rather suspected that if Ms. Misora tried to share the email he sent to her with her fiance (a letter that really did require someone to be open-minded and open to risks) he wouldn’t be as proactive about it as she would like. There was no way, in his mind, that she would not get involved. 

Well, Ryuk thought. As usual, he was right. After all, Ryuk was now flying behind Light as he chatted with Ms. Misora and built a rapport with her. Light had her face and her real name, knew what information she had, and knew where L and the investigators were staying. Admittedly, Light already had all of that information, but now Misora knew that he knew all of that and would be able to pass it onto L and the other investigators when she got to them. 

To everyone but L, who would only serve to isolate himself further if he pressed the issue, Light’s character would be unassailable after this. Light not only met and didn’t hurt Ms. Misora, but he was also actively protecting her by insisting she get to see L or his father and refusing to leave her side until she did. It also took away any argument L could have made about Light not being able to kill the woman because she’d told him her real name and not just the alias. 

He was making a friend of her right now - and an ally. Ryuk could see she was becoming fond of his best friend, even before the two humans and Shinigami left the police station. By the time they got to the hotel, she would be even more enamored by him, Light-o could always be so charming when he wanted to be!

Light-o had assured him that L would still try to attack his character anyway, even without a leg to stand on, and their war would be all the more entertaining for it. Ryuk found himself hard-pressed to disagree and he felt his smile stretch further at the thought. 

Light really did have the best ideas.

Chapter Text

“It must be nice visiting home after being gone for so long.” Light commented, liking the smile that got from Naomi. She was smiling a lot more during this conversation than she had during their lost one, but that was to be expected since he spent that entire conversation manipulating her into a state of desperation and then ended it by killing her. A particularly uncomfortable thought, especially since Naomi had quickly shown herself to be a pleasant person. 

He regretted that he didn’t get to know her like this in his past life. She had just finished telling him about what brought her to Japan in the first place, something he hadn’t known until now. Apparently, she was born and raised in Japan but had moved to America after she got a job offer from the FBI. She’d worked for quite a few years and had been happy in her job, but she’d been so busy that she rarely got to visit her parents back here. When her fiance got called over here for his job, they agreed that she’d tag along with him so that she could see her parents and introduce her love to them. 

“It is,” Naomi answered, readily. “I’ve been so busy for long, it will be nice to see them again and I’m especially excited for them to meet Raye. He’s always joking that he’s going to have to prove his worth to my father.” 

“Raye is your fiance?” Light checked. 

“Yes, he is.” She said. “We’ll be married soon.” They walked in silence for a few moments. 

“So do you mind if I ask what you’re doing here, in a more literal sense?” Light asked Naomi as they walked the path to the hotel. “Why did you come here with the information that you did? I won’t ask how you got the information that you did, I do know better than that, but why did you choose to bring it in to the police station? Why do anything with it?”

“Well,” Naomi started, looking pensive. “I was an FBI agent for a long time, I guess the instincts of one are still in my bones. Even if I wasn’t on the case, once I got critical information about it, I didn’t feel right keeping it to myself. I had to bring it to the proper authorities. I brought it to my fiance’s attention first, but...he didn’t take it seriously. So I thought to take it to the police, but because I didn’t know who to trust in the police force, I decided the information couldn’t get out to anyone who wasn’t on the Kira Taskforce. Anyone, even an officer, could be Kira or working for him.” 

“Absolutely right,” Light agreed with a serious nod, giving her an admiring look that she flourished under. “That’s a good call. Many people would be blinded by the idea of police officers and forget that they’re human, that they can be as immoral as some of the worst criminals at their own worst.”

“You’re right about that.” Naomi agreed, quietly. “I’ve met a lot of good people working for the FBI, but I’ll admit that some…” 

“The world sees all sorts.” Light said, wisely. 

Naomi looked at him in surprised awe for a second but agreed quickly enough. “I suppose that’s true. For your age, you seem very mature.” She noted. 

“Thanks.” He smiled. “My dad often says the same thing. And you have a very good moral compass, Ms. Misora. I’m impressed that you took it upon yourself to do this on your own when you couldn’t get support, especially since I think I distinctly heard you say that you were an FBI agent?” Light said, inquiringly. 

Naomi looked at him in surprise for a moment before sighing slightly and looking down at her feet as she walked. “Yes, I quit recently in preparation for our wedding.” 

Why? Light wondered, deeply confused. He made a concerted effort, though, to keep his tone mild so as not to scare her off of it. “And why did you do that?”

“I…” Naomi looked confused at his confusion. It looked almost as if she expected him to know immediately why from that information alone. Is there something I’m missing? Light wondered. “We agreed that I should retire from work to take care of the home we’d have together.” She watched him as she said this. Looking for some recognition of her point, perhaps? 

Well, she’s going to be disappointed. Light thought. I still don’t get it. “I’m sorry.” Light apologized. “I think I’m having an off day today, I don’t seem to be getting it. Could you explain a little further?” 

“Well, we are planning to have children eventually…” She drew off. 

Light sighed with a small amount of frustration. “I keep missing your point. What should you having a marriage, a home, and even children have to do with you quitting your job?” 

If Naomi looked surprised and confused before, she looked outright shocked now. She stopped walking and stared at Light for a long minute, Light having stopped walking too. “Um…” Light started as the next minute wore on. “I hate to rush you, but I’m sure my father and the other investigators will get worried if we take too long to get there. It is a dangerous business.” He cautioned her. 

“Oh, right. Of course.” Naomi shook herself and stepped forward again, with Light taking up beside her. “I’m sorry about that.” 

“It’s alright.” Light gave her a small smile. “But what was it about?”

“Well, it’s just…” Naomi struggled with what to say, but she plunged ahead. “I guess I just didn’t expect that. It was nice to hear, though.” She assured, hurriedly. “I guess I just sort of expected you to be of the same mind as my fiance...and I.” 

“Your fiance?” Light peered at her. 

“He...we decided that I should stay at the house.” She answered. 

Something on her face when she said that was… “And were you happy with that? I’m sure you were great at your job, too.” Light asked. 

“I...well, to tell you the truth, I don’t like the idea very much. I enjoyed my work at the FBI and it took some convincing from Raye for me to agree to it.” She sighed. 

“...Do you think you made a mistake?” Light asked. 

Her eyes snapped to him, wide. Then they softened a little as she whispered, “I don’t know. I thought it was for the best like he said, but I miss it. It’s harder than I thought it would be, watching people work on a case and not being able to work with them.” 

Light nodded, in understanding. He wasn’t interested in being a police officer anymore, but he could understand the frustration at seeing cases mishandled or even ignored and knowing he could do better than that. And if it was in his past life, then it would have been the ultimate insult and would have eaten away at him. 

“Why quit then, if you’re made for it so much? It sounds like it was what Raye wanted, not you. Or am I wrong?” He knew he might be pushing a bit much here, but the more he was hearing about the matter, the more aggravated he was getting, not that it showed. 

“I guess you aren’t wrong.” Naomi sighed, clutching her bag and staring straight ahead. 

“I’m sorry if I’m overstepping,” Light started, carefully. “But what you’re describing to me sounds like you were pressured into making a decision that you’re uncomfortable with.” 

“It’s not like that!” Naomi turned to him with a sense of urgency. “He just wants what’s best for us moving forward.” 

“But who is he to decide what is best for the both of you, alone?” Light returned with a question. “Any relationship is a partnership and I don’t think any partnership can last if it starts out with such an uncomfortable situation? It sets a bad precedent for the rest of your relationship.”

Naomi blinked at him in awe before her expression shuttered a little. “You really are quite mature for your age, Light.” She said in an almost mournful tone. “I honestly don’t know what to say. Raye is a good man.” 

“Good people can do bad things.” Light said simply and left it at that. That was enough for now and Naomi continued to stare straight ahead as if the path ahead could provide the answers to her problems.

It was only a few minutes later that they got to the hotel. “Here it is.” Light announced lightly, stopping in front of the doors. “Dad said that L’s aid would meet you in the lobby and take you to the room L’s staying in.” 

“Wait, only me?” She looked at him. “You aren’t coming?”

“Dad said that he got permission from L for both of us to come up, but I think it would be appropriate if I didn’t.” Light insisted. “I’m not involved in the investigation and it should probably stay that way. I’m a teenager, I should focus on school and my own well-being and...I don’t think my dad - and certainly not my mom - wants me anywhere near it. I’ll respect that and keep my distance, this is as far as I’ll go.” Light smiled, his dimples showing. “You go on inside. You’ll be alright now.” He added, softly. 

Naomi’s surprised expression slowly softened into something almost...affectionate? It nearly made Light take a step back in his own shock. Had he...had he really bonded with her so much this time? He didn’t deny liking Naomi, but that look was so soft and caring, he didn’t actually remember the last time he’d seen an expression like that directed at him. 

“Alright, Light,” Naomi said, nodding. “If that’s how you feel, I won’t say anything about it, but I will make sure the Task Force knows the seriousness of what you’ve done for me.” She promised. “I hope that’s alright with you.” 

“Yeah.” Light smiled, widely. “That’s perfectly fine. I wish you all the best and...if you need anything again, you can always contact me, I’ll do what I can to help. My dad can help you reach me.” Light made his own promise. 

“Great. Thank you so much, Light.” Naomi smiled the brightest she had since she walked into the police station and they both waved to each other as she disappeared through the hotel doors. 

Light hummed as she disappeared from sight and turned on his heel to begin heading back home. He didn’t want to worry his mother more than he already had. Ryuk flew down to hover more level with the ground and continued following Light. “Hey, Light-o. Got a question!” He announced.

“Sure, Ryuk. What is it?” He responded. 

“Why didn’t you go up?” The other Shinigami asked. “Don’t you want to see L? Get involved in the investigation?”

“I do want to see L,” Light sighed. “But if I went up now, it would be more on his terms, he’d be able to control the encounter more. I know I can’t completely control when L confronts me, but when I see L again, I want it to be when we can meet on more equal ground. As for getting involved in the investigation, why should I? Before, I wanted to get involved in the investigation because I was worried about getting caught. I don’t have that worry anymore. I also liked the idea of being right under L’s nose and messing with him, because I was arrogant and didn’t care that L wanted me there, too. Well, I still like to mess with L, but I don’t need to insert myself into the investigation like a desperate child begging for recognition.” Light scoffed and shook his head at the memories. “I’ll see L again, don’t worry about me. And when I do, I’ll make sure he’s too intrigued to ever leave me behind.”

“Any ideas on how you want that to happen?” Ryuk inquired. 

“A few.” Light said, slyly. “And there may have been another reason why I didn’t want to go up.” 

“Which is?” Ryuk grinned, eagerly. 

“It gives my innocence an even bigger boost with the investigators knowing that I had an in for getting into the investigation room and turned it down. Miss Naomi is my character reference, but this is objective evidence. If I was Kira, I should want to get in there to know what’s happening, but I don’t. Everyone but L will be convinced like this long into when the investigation gets heated. Even my extraordinary ‘luck’ with running into Naomi at the police station is much less extraordinary when I’ve been going there so often to visit dad. Once again, no one but L will find this suspicious.” 

Light threw back his head and laughed, thankful the street they were on was empty. “Oh, L is going to go crazy!” Light settled and kept on walking, listening to Ryuk’s chuckles. 

“You’re always so interesting, Light. There’s not another person like you, Shinigami or human.” 

“I’m sure that’s not true.” Light said, honestly. He knew he was something, but how could anyone possibly be that unique? Hyperbole, to be sure. 

“It’s true.” Ryuk insisted, with his usual grin. “Even among Shinigami, we’re all aimless, unlike you. Even when you didn’t remember your human life, you still cared about things. Maybe it was because you were young, but still. Besides, I know you know I’ve heard of Shinigami dying before you, but I’ve never heard of Shinigami being reborn like you have. You’re the first I know who’s experienced this. Breaking the mold again, aren’t we?” 

Light was really surprised, he hadn’t actually thought about that. It was that special? Light allowed a small smile to tug at his lips. 

“What if your boyfriend calls in help besides the FBI?” Ryuk inquired, after a few moments. 

“I’m hoping he will.” Light smirked. “In fact, I’m hoping that he’ll call in someone specific. You know, when he realizes I’m too much for him.” 

“Someone in mind?” Ryuk repeated, curiously. 

Light nodded, cheerfully. “He has successors for a reason, right? I’m hoping L will call in Near to help, as his primary successor.”

“That’s right!” Ryuk snapped his fingers. “You cared for him quite a bit, didn’t you?”

Light sighed, but when his gaze found the street, he had a small smile on his face. “It started out of guilt, even if I didn’t understand that at the time, but yeah. I grew...fond of him, that kid.” He spoke with a thin voice. 

“There was just something about his understated misery, how he never seemed to enjoy life. He rarely smiled and he had no close relationships. Even my interpersonal relationships were better than his. I think, between the guilt and being able to see every lonely moment of his life, I started wanting to protect him. Hoping, maybe, that if he had more time, he’d learn to live his life. Well,” Light huffed. “Now that I’ve started things over again, I want to see if he can’t be happier.” 

“So that’s why you want him here,” Ryuk commented. 

“Right.” Light nodded, looking up at the horizon as he and Ryuk headed home. “I had to watch him being miserable when I was nothing more than a spectator. Now that I’m a player again, I’m taking this seriously.”

Chapter Text

L stared at the security camera feed as Naomi Misora and Light Yagami separated. Watari brought Naomi up to their room while Light looked at the hotel doors for a moment and then turned to walk away. At that moment, L lunged forward and paused the video, rewinding it and playing it. He got so close that his nose nearly pressed against it. There it was again!

For a split second between when Light was looking at the building and when he turned away, his eyes flicked up from the hotel doors to the higher floors. For that split second, Light’s eyes landed on the very floor L and the investigators were on, almost looking right at the window to the very room. Then L watched again as Light, as if nothing had happened, turned his back on the hotel and left. 

How strange. 

L leaned back as Watari and Naomi finally came into the room and quickly reviewed everything that he knew so far about this situation. Naomi had come across some important information relevant to the Kira case and just so happened to come to the police station on the same day at the same time that L had invited all of the remaining members of the Kira Investigation to meet with him personally. She also happened to run into Light Yagami, who was there at the same time. 

L pressed a thumb to his lips. On the surface, it didn’t seem like there was much going on here. The first was certainly a strange coincidence but no one would chalk it up to anything more and the second wouldn’t even strike most people as strange. 

After all, Light Yagami had been spending a large amount of his time visiting the police station lately. Chief Yagami reported to him that Light visited multiple times a week, on differing days. No one knew that the investigators weren’t going to be there, not even Light Yagami, so it made logical sense that the boy would show up to see his father and would run into Ms. Misora while he was there. 

It made logical sense and yet... something about the situation struck him as odd. There were so many coincidences involved with the situation, such as the fact that Light chose to listen to and help her get in contact with his father. He could have just left her there or told his father about her later, but no, Light Yagami took her situation and her words seriously. Maybe he was just an open-minded kid, L told himself. A good person who couldn't or wouldn't want to leave someone in apparent trouble. 

He's the son of a police chief. Of course, he would want to get involved and make sure if she was alright. 

Still, and he couldn’t say what it was, but none of this struck him as an accident. No...this seemed calculated...planned. A near-perfect mockery of an accidental meeting. But if that was the case, then what did it mean? 

Light Yagami insisted on walking Naomi all the way here for her protection, which could fit in with him either being a good samaritan or a nosy kid. Both could make sense for the son of the police chief. He then left without coming inside, respecting his boundaries even if they were unstated. Objectively, there was nothing suspicious here, but his brain wouldn’t leave it alone. His instincts had closed more cases than all of the evidence in a whole police station and there was something about this situation that just…

“Welcome. Please take a seat.” L greeted, whirling around in his chair and stuffing a bite of cake into his mouth. “It’s good to see you again, Naomi.” 

“You as well, L.” She smiled with clear relief on her face. The other investigators made room for her and she settled down into her new seat. 

It did seem she was happy to see him, but that made sense with how desperate she likely was to pass on the information she had on the Kira Case. After inviting her to explain and seeing what she had come up with, L could see why she thought the information was important enough that she could only tell it to him. It would change the entire investigation if it proved true since it could reveal additional victims that Kira might wish to stay hidden. 

How Light Yagami fit into this, L didn't quite know yet, but it felt wrong to just chalk it up to meaningless coincidence. Light Yagami's behavior, from start to finish, was completely beyond reproach. One might even say he was too innocent.

Wouldn't someone that age show some personal interest in the investigation? Especially since his father was heavily involved? Even if they didn't want to be an officer, some amount of curiosity was normal. Yet, Light had shown none. It may have been easily missed by most due to the friendly nature of his actions, but his stance towards the investigation seemed perfectly indifferent. As much as he seemed to want to help Naomi, he didn't seem eager in any way for the actual investigation to be helped. 

There was only so much data L could gather without meeting the boy personally, but he couldn't help but wonder if this apparent disinterest was genuine or feigned. Perhaps the boy thought to look more adult by pretending not to care or that it would invite their interest if he didn't? Or maybe, L couldn't help but think, there was another reason he didn't want to seem too interested. 

If Light was worried about looking too interested in the state of the Kira Investigation...could it be that there was a less innocent explanation for it? Was he looking too much into it?

"Naomi," L said, at last. "Would you be so kind as to tell me what you thought of Light Yagami?"

"Light Yagami?" Naomi looked up, surprised at the teenager being brought up. The surprise on her face faded as she thought for a moment, L waiting patiently. "Light proved himself to be a smart and perceptive boy, from the moment we met. He was open to my case and used his unique resources to help me." She said firmly, with a nod towards Soichiro Yagami as she mentioned this. The man showed no reaction besides a twinge of pride. 

"More than that, he was kind," She continued. "He showed more concern for me than he needed to and he was unfailingly respectful."

L hummed as he took in that information, stirring his tea. That was reasonably generic information, it didn't tell him much about Light's motivations, although it might shine some light on Light's character. 

If Naomi was correct in her observation, then there was nothing for L to reasonably be concerned about. A respectful and kind boy would have no need to avoid looking suspicious by feigning disinterest in the investigation. Yes, it would make sense for a respectful person to observe even unspoken boundaries and stay away. That could have been what happened here. 

And yet, L found himself dissatisfied with this account. While he trusted Naomi's judgment, there was something regarding this whole setup that nagged at him. Especially so if this boy was indeed perceptive and intelligent. Intelligence was something that often led one to get into trouble; L knew this from experience. It was not the habit of intelligent individuals to stay in their lane and not get involved with things. 

"Mr. Yagami, how would you describe your son?" L found himself asking, looking for something that would either feed his suspicions or put them to rest. He dug his thumb into his lip. 

"My son is a good kid." Soichiro Yagami said after a few seconds, looking at L oddly. He was used to that. "He's at the top of his class, gets excellent grades, and behaves himself. He does a good job of looking after the family when I'm not there, which is quite often." The older man said with noticeable guilt. 

Once again, L found the information to be of little help. Even more generic than Naomi's, it did barely a thing more than tell L that the boy was good at pleasing his parents and verifying Naomi's observation about his intellect. The information, like before, should have put L's mind at ease and convinced him that Light Yagami was a perfectly forgettable teenager who was nothing particularly special.

So why did it feel like Light Yagami was too perfectly ordinary? It felt more akin to a cultivated mask than a true character assessment and it made him reluctantly intrigued even though he didn't know if it had anything to do with the Kira Investigation. Until now, L had not entertained the idea of informing the task force members that he had brought in the FBI to tail their family members. 

Even if they had difficulty trusting him, he didn't think giving them that information would work strongly in his favor. They, the lot of them, were a highly emotional bunch. He doubted they would see the logic in it past their emotions. 

One of the first things L had decided early on in their meeting was that the group was disappointingly dim, even as a collective. It wasn't that L had had his hopes up that any of them would be uniquely intelligent among law enforcement officers. It was just depressing how average they all were for their group, how much they were like the vast majority of officers out there. L had quite a bit of personal experience working with people in that particular field, he knew what the base average personality and intelligence was and it was dismal across the board. 

That was as a group. As individuals, some were easily more irritating than others. At least in the case of Soichiro Yagami, he had a genuine belief in honor and endeavored to think things through, to not give in to emotion. He was obviously dedicated to his job. L found himself admiring it in his own way, even if he had no desire to emulate it. 

Most of the others lacked even that minimal amount of credit. Aizawa, while clearly deferential towards his chief, was the loudest of the group. He often spoke at a high volume and took every opportunity to speak his - very obvious - opinion. Unfortunately, as was common to those types of individuals, he had nothing witty to say or of true substance. If anything, he was actively unhelpful, challenging him right from the beginning but not in a way that added anything to the investigation. 

Mogi had yet to show a strong sense of personality unlike the other investigators, but he wasn't actively harmful to the investigation and at least initially appeared to be dedicated to the investigation. More would become apparent as time went on if he stuck around, even though the man was easily the most reserved of the group. Ukita was like a slightly more positive and less disrespectful version of Aizawa, but L could already tell that he was impulsive and impatient. That was going to be unpleasant to try and curb during the investigation. 

The tier of mental dexterity came to a crash at rock bottom with Matsuda. How he was an investigator was astounding, both in how he had been hired and why he even aimed for such a career. He really struck L as someone who would be more at home in a social setting with a far lower sense of severity. He was easily the least helpful of the group and would probably be relegated to getting them all coffee rather than doing anything actually helpful.

In truth, the group should be grateful that L had easily picked up on their overall unimpressive unintelligence. Even if he was meeting with them in person as his way of holding out the requested olive branch of partial trust to his temporary coworkers, one could never be too careful. Kira would surely be eager to learn more about the investigation and to meet L in person if he could, so L wanted to be reasonably convinced that Kira wasn't among them. 

He was more than reasonably convinced.

He'd interviewed them individually and come away quickly from each one with the conviction that Kira could be neither so stupid nor so unimaginative. No, the person who called him out on live TV, using a criminal as a mouthpiece, was not among this group. He'd announced that deduction to the group at the conclusion of the interviews, cutting out the problematic aspects of his deduction that would have offended most of them and created problems. The group reacted with large smiles and relief, unaware of the insult he ultimately meant by that statement in a mildly entertaining way. 

So it was only now that L began to consider informing them of what he was planning to do, using the FBI. He didn't trust them to add anything of use and doing so allowed them the possibility to intervene and make a nuisance of themselves. However, the passing of Light Yagami through L's periphery brought to the investigation...a point of interest. A brown-haired, golden-eyed point of interest. 

Should L tell Chief Yagami that the detective could steadily feel his interest being piqued by his son's behavior or his lack of behavior? To do so would almost necessitate telling the group about his requesting the FBI's presence. He decided he would take some more time to sit on the thought and make his final decision later.

Naomi was a breath of fresh air in the investigation, a much welcome one even if she was curiously supportive of Light Yagami. L had gotten to know her during the LA BB Murder Case and had been truly impressed by her by the end. Perhaps it had something to do with her being FBI, people who tended to be several cuts above the average officer which was why he had specifically requested their presence in Japan, but he knew that it was the fact that she had the rationale and the mind for possibilities that had allowed her to become one of the best in her field. They obviously hadn't kept in contact after the case, but L couldn't help but be pleased to see her here and getting involved in the Kira Case. 

"Ms. Misora," L asked, curiously. "Is there any problem you have with providing your laptop so that we could investigate the sender of the message?" He was, of course, referring to the anonymous tip she admitted to having received that had given her the sensitive information that had ultimately brought her to him. 

"I already referred it to a contact of mine," Naomi informed him, readily. "They couldn't find anything."

L hummed. He severely doubted that her contact would hold a candle to L's own resources. Most were laughable. "Still, if it's all the same, I'd prefer to have a go at it." 

He was certain he could find something that would lead them to an individual, one who perhaps knew more about Kira. If they could find this person, they could be a potential ally. At worst, they would still have defined an unknown element, which was enough reason to go through with seeking them out on its own. 

"Of course." Naomi nodded. "I hope you have better luck than I did."

"Hmm...I hope so, as well." L pondered. "Do you intend to get further involved in the case now that you're here?"

Naomi got an uncomfortable expression and looked down at her lap, before snapping her head back up as she realized how vulnerable that looked. In the world of law enforcement, image was everything. L knew this just as well as she did. You had to look strong or else you would appear weak. 

"Well, you see the thing is that I'm not with the FBI anymore." She informed him, voice steady and back straight.

L’s eyes widened slightly. “I wasn’t aware of that fact. May I ask why that is?”

“I...have a fiance now.” She answered, slowly. “I had quit my job so I could focus on the family we’re going to have together.” 

“Then why did you get involved now with the Kira Case?” L inquired. 

“It’s as I said, I was contacted by an anonymous informant and I couldn’t just ignore it.” Naomi insisted. 

“So do you intend to get further involved in the investigation?” L. 

Naomi looked at him in surprise. “I…I hadn’t thought about it.” She admitted. “I’ll be honest in saying that I hadn’t really considered what I would do after this. Would...would I be welcomed in the investigation?”

L hummed nonchalantly, taking a sip of his tea. “Of course. You were quite impressive in the case we worked together and I don’t particularly mind that you no longer work with the FBI. You have perfectly enough qualifications for me.” 

“Oh...thank you.” Naomi seemed flattered by his words. L didn’t understand why, it was only the truth. She was perfectly qualified to be of assistance. “May I have time to think about it?” She asked him. 

“Mm. Take as much time as you’d like. Watari will take you back to wherever you're staying to take possession of your laptop. He will make sure to let you know how to contact him before he leaves and you may do so at any time once you’ve made a decision on your involvement.” L answered. 

Naomi thanked him and bowed to them all before leaving with Watari, a thoughtful and troubled look on her face. 

~ 🅚 ~

Once everyone but Watari had left, L reviewed what he knew about Kira or at least what he suspected he knew. 

Kira hated criminals, loathed them. If L had to guess, Kira probably saw criminals as scum. Kira's statement using Lind L. Tailor couldn't be relied upon to be completely genuine and likely wasn't. Though Kira used the opportunity to attack what L had chosen to do with Tailor, Kira had still killed him, implying that he didn't empathize with Tailor all that much. Otherwise, why not spare him? It was possible that Kira thought they were being truthful or they could just have been lying through their teeth to make L seem like the bad guy in the situation. 

Irritatingly, it worked. From online forums and interviews done by the news media, support for Kira seemed to have risen substantially. There was support for Kira from the beginning, people jumping on the bandwagon the moment it showed up, but the sharp jump in public support could only be a direct result of Kira's actions. 

Clever. Kira was very clever. Not a mindless serial killer...no, they were nothing of the sort. They knew just how to make themself look good and make anyone attacking them look like public enemy number one. They did and said all of the right things to ensure people overlooked how evil his acts were. People had begun to see Kira as some kind of vigilante, on the side of good. Fighting for the public where the police and the justice system had failed. 

...Maybe Kira saw themself like that, too. After all, that one particular murder that Naomi brought forward from her informant spoke to something of that nature. L had immediately looked it up on his computer and it did appear that Kira was now trying to solve cases in his own Kira-ish way. The member of organized crime that had died had immediately been recognized as a Kira victim. 

However, the behavior they engaged in beforehand had not seemed strange enough to either the investigating officers or L to arouse their suspicions that Kira had controlled these actions. It frustrated L now that he could have missed something so obvious. The officer whose dirty dealings had been uncovered thanks to that incident had been prosecuted and public support for Kira had reacted to the news of a dirty cop by growing. 

It made sense that Kira would want to take the cop down with the criminal in this way since it would feed both his ego and his public support. The most frustrating fact of all is that he chose to do it in a way that didn't harm the cop. The cop should have been a criminal in his eyes and therefore fair game for a heart attack. Or, according to the new information that L had gotten from Naomi, then Kira could have had the officer die of another cause of death if they wanted to hide it. But no, Kira chose to out their crimes to law enforcement over hurting them, and even if none of the public or law enforcement knew of Kira's involvement in that, L knew. 

And it irked him. Kira was removing any mistakes L could use against them by refusing to make them in the first place! Kira was winning. 

Still, none of that changed that this was someone arrogant enough to act as judge, jury, and executioner. Under what authority do they have to do such a thing? It didn't matter, L would take pleasure in knocking them down several pegs. Still, there were several additional troubling pieces of information that he couldn’t quite place yet. 

Kira had known about Lind L. Tailor and perhaps even the entirety of L’s plan regarding the man, which implied Kira had connections within law enforcement or was perhaps even an officer himself. Still, L had kept as few people as possible informed about what he had planned with Tailor, so the average lower-level officer wouldn’t have known about it. No one on the Kira Task Force had, he’d made sure of it. If the leak had come from one of the few people who were informed before the Tailor Incident, it would narrow the field of suspects down significantly. 

But could it really have been one of them? It seemed too simple, too straightforward. And perhaps exactly what Kira wanted him to do, going down the wrong path and chasing shadows while Kira was left to make plans against him. 

The Kira Taskforce hadn’t known about Tailor before Kira informed the entire Kanto region of it, but that didn’t mean information wasn’t being leaked from there. At least, before the mass exodus of officers. L trailed his fingers over the pin that lay on the table. The very reason he initially got in contact with the FBI to request their assistance. He could still remember the shock and suspicion of that day when the pin had been found on the floor of the office being used exclusively for the Kira Investigation. 

He still didn’t know how it had gotten there besides, of course, someone having brought it in. L was almost certain that it hadn’t been there before the meeting had started, meaning it was brought in sometime during or after. A Kira pin, one of the grotesque items being sold recently in response to the growing support the killer has received. L had been tangentially aware of these things but truly hadn’t expected to find one within the boundaries of the police station. To think that someone would have been so brash as to bring that in...and so lucky that they could bring it, drop it, and still not be linked back to it. The offender was still undetected and they only had the one obvious conclusion to go on. 

Someone in the Kira Investigation had been allied with Kira. 

For all they knew, the officer was still keeping tabs on the police station for Kira, just from outside of the Investigation this time. L felt his blood boil at the thought. Someone in there was supporting the serial killer in one way or another, but that had been before most of the officers had left for one reason or another and the person responsible had likely been culled with the rest of the officers. L had felt sure that anyone working with Kira would refuse to leave and he would be able to find out who the most likely individual was, but he was absolutely certain that none of the remaining members were guilty of it. It confused him that Kira’s supporter would have left. Surely, they would want to stick around and gather information…but L supposed that was only the case if they were in contact with Kira. 

If they were simply an officer who was a supporter of Kira, not an informant, then they probably never wanted to be on the Kira case, to begin with, and would have been eager to leave. They wouldn’t want to be part of the team trying to catch their liege if it served no purpose. 

L was going to have to keep a close eye on this aspect of the investigation because none of it was making sense. Only a few individuals could have known about Tailor previously to him appearing on television, but none of those people had been part of the Kira Investigation and none of them fit the image of Kira that L had in his head, regardless. 

The only person who L had met who he could even remotely conceive of being Kira was...

Chapter Text

Ryuk hovered over Light's shoulder as Light ate his dinner. The family dinners were always stilted to the Shinigami and so it was always a tossup on whether or not Ryuk would stick around during it or just wait for Light up in their room. As for his opinion on the dinners, Light was used to them. He didn't use to think they were anything special back in his previous life, but he thought now that that might be rather the point. 

There was nothing about their family dinners at all that was special or indeed even noticeable and that could very well be the root of the thing. Light had seen and even taken part in nights out, eating and drinking with coworkers. He'd seen other people do the same. Even during the time that he lived with Misa, the many dinners he'd had with her were different than at home. She was always chatting and excitedly talking about her day or asking Light about his. Of course, he didn't really draw any conclusions from this in his first life; he had already turned "Light Yagami" into a persona rather than a person and had lost that ability to look at himself objectively that he would have needed to do so. 

Now though, things were different. He felt different. Family dinners felt different, for all that he was used to them and was able to take part in it without any external or internal discomfort. 

In all honesty, Light didn't know exactly what made dinners with his family feel so different compared to his other past experiences. It wasn't that there was no conversation. Although there were more quiet moments during dinner than was comfortable, there was still a good amount of talking. 

His mother would ask him and his sister about their days, Sayu would talk about school and her friends, and Light would answer simply with what he knew his mother wanted to hear. She would nod happily at whatever Light said and turn her attention to something else. Besides asking him the generic question about how his day was, she only ever asked him about school. Well, if one of her friends had mentioned their daughter to her recently, then she would try to work in a conversation about that. Maybe she would make a single comment or ask one more question about what he said, but then her attention would turn. 

Light would try to remember what Sayu said about her day, but it felt like the same thing on repeat and he couldn't even empathize with what she was talking about the first time he heard it. It usually involved complaining about classes, talking about something she did with her friends (shopping or gossiping, almost invariably), and whining about boys. Light…

Light couldn't get it, not in a meaningful way. It wasn't Sayu's fault, either. They were just different. Light finished his dinner and got up from the table, collecting his plate and washing it in the sink before excusing himself to his room. He grabbed a piece of apple tart to go on his way up, listening to his sister teasing him about his recent sugar consumption on the way. Something about how he'll break out if he keeps eating sweets. He brushed it off. 

Light closed and locked his bedroom door as he went in, holding the door open for Ryuk to come in before he did so. He sat at his desk and dug into his tart, letting Ryuk have a big bite when the other Shinigami hovered near him. 

"Man, that was a boring dinner!" Ryuk whined after he'd eaten his bit, humming contentedly. He floated over to Light's bed and spread himself out on it, looking back at his friend. "How do you stand it?" 

"Practice." Light answered, simply. 

"But seriously!" Ryuk said. "If I have to listen to your sister go on about how hard her homework is one more time, I'm going to lose it!! She does know that it won't get any easier the more she complains about it, right?"

"Yeah," Light sighed. "But it's probably better to let her get it all out so she can actually do the work."

" If she does it," Ryuk said, but he couldn't argue against the work usually getting done. It was just usually put off until the last minute. "Say. I was wondering something as I listened to your family chat and I nearly forgot to ask about it! Why doesn't your mom ask Sayu about her schoolwork like she does with you?" The Shinigami cocked his head. 

Light turned to look at him. "She asked Sayu if she finished her homework." Light pointed out. 

"But that was it." Ryuk elaborated. "She tried to talk with you for seven minutes about school, but with Sayu, she barely touched on it. Your sister even answered the question by saying that she hadn't finished her work and your mom basically left it at that! I'm still not an expert on humans, but I'm pretty sure that she should've realized at that point which child she should be discussing school with."

Light looked at him for a few seconds before sighing. "I don't know what to tell you. I don't always understand why my parents do the things they do, either. It just is what it is, on that front." He answered. 

"Has it always been like that?" Ryuk asked, going over his own memories of Light's past life, only to find that he couldn't remember much because he didn't pay attention to that kind of thing the first time around. 

"For as long as I can remember." Light answered, leaning his chin on his palm. He turned over a piece of tart in his hand. "With me, it was always about school, and with Sayu, it was about everything else."

"And you don't see anything wrong with that?" It was a question, but Ryuk's tone of voice said he already suspected the answer he was going to get. 

"It's…" Light started but cut himself off with another sigh. "Of course I do." He admitted. "But that's the way things are done here and they wouldn't understand what my problem was if I brought it up. I'm the oldest child, the son, it's my job to be successful. Any success Sayu finds in school is an unnecessary accomplishment. For me, it's a given, it's expected. Her job is to be the younger child, the girl. As long as she doesn't become a wild child, she can more or less do whatever she wants. All of the responsibility falls to me, anyway."

Ryuk peered at him in sorrow. "Is that how you felt before?" 

Light smiled, his sadness shining through. "I took it for granted that that was the way it had to be, before. I was never really encouraged to take inspiration for how to live my life from outside sources. My parents were always the type that felt that whatever morals and values their children needed to know would be learned at home. We were always treated differently because our roles had been decided the moment we were born. Sayu seems happy with hers, but I think mine choked me. Stunted my growth and made it harder for me to branch out and try things." He informed his friend. 

He thought for a moment before continuing on. "I think that's a part of the reason that I have a hard time connecting with my sister. I'm sure we're just naturally different people, to some extent. There's probably a lot of siblings out there that can't understand each other, but…" Light let out a slow breath. "But I do think there's more to it than just that. After all, how can I possibly empathize with her incessant need to complain about her work or how difficult it is or having to go to school, at all? I'm great at learning and memorizing, but I'm this way because I worked hard for it and I did that because I was never given the choice to do otherwise. She gets to complain about school and homework, but I would have been scolded by our parents even as a little kid if I had done the same. Maybe told to work harder. Either way, it wouldn't have been tolerated or treated with much empathy, even by mom, if I had tried to gripe even half as much as Sayu does. Does that make sense?" He asked Ryuk.

Ryuk rather thought it did. It was a gross double standard, the Shinigami realized. One the sister didn't see (as well as the parents) and one Light only saw because he had the extra years of maturity and experience. It was a large reason why the two siblings couldn't connect well, it appeared. 

"Maybe I'm just smart, but I always put in so much effort into school, too. I'm not trying to say that I think Sayu doesn't put in any work towards school, but it's obvious watching her that she doesn't take it all that seriously. And why should she? No one else does. She doesn't go to after school study like I always did, no matter how high my grades were.  She goes out with friends or comes home and watches TV. She was always encouraged to ask for help with her schoolwork whereas I was pressured into finding the answers myself, reading through textbook after textbook to find them. She’s average at it so she’ll probably get a decent job and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that, in principle. Not everyone has to like or be good at school or even get a high-paying job, whatever our parent's beliefs are. Maybe our parents don't fully expect her to get a job. After all, our mom is a housewife and she acts the way the Japanese ideal of a wife should and my education is treated more seriously partially because I'm a boy, so maybe that's it." Light's gaze was somewhere a little bit further away than the room. 

He was looking into his own past, in a way. Going through every memory and every interaction that came to mind. He and his sister as little kids, among other times. Even back then, Light knew they were treated differently, but it would be a while before he realized that it wasn't just because he was the older one. Light couldn’t decide if his family was abnormal or if they were too normal. The demure housewife, the absent and authoritative father, the bubbly and impetuous little sister, and the responsible and overachieving older brother. 

Before in his previous life, all Light would have been able to say about his family if pressed was that it was normal. Completely, unassailably normal. He had more to say about it now. In a lot of ways, Light felt they were the ideal of the perfect family, especially in Japan. Maybe there was a reason why most families never completely achieved this ideal...it was not meant to be met. A dream is just that, a dream. 

The moment people begin twisting and bending themselves to meet a trivial ideal - or worse, twisting someone else - mental and emotional health begins to deteriorate significantly. He wondered if they were indeed twisting and bending themselves or if they fell into their roles naturally. Maybe his father really had always felt more comfortable working than being with his family. More in his element. Maybe his mother had always wanted to be the ruler of a household and family and nothing else. More manageable than maintaining a job. 

Maybe they were both just happy as they were and had always been...maybe Sayu was happy. Light couldn't say and despite them being his family, he didn't feel close enough to them to ask. All Light could say was how he felt. He wasn't happy. Not with the role he'd been placed into in his family, at least. Probably never had been. Maybe he'd taken a perverse pride in being put on a pedestal, but that was poisonous more than anything else. 

Light shook the thoughts from his head as Ryuk replied. "That's real messed up." The Shinigami muttered in irritation. He didn't particularly care about what humans did or didn't do. Generally speaking, human suffering was pure entertainment for him and at best, he was indifferent to it. What did anger him was what he could clearly see that it had done to Light . 

Ryuk had watched Light do so much growing up over time, but he realized seeing Light like this that things from the past could and did still hurt him. His dear friend might have grown past it, but they still happened. Well, at least Light had him now and Ryuk had no interest in pressuring Light to do anything. He could be himself in the realm of this room.

"Soooooo," Ryuk started, dragging the word out. "What do you thinks gonna happen with Raye Penber and the FBI investigation?" He was trying to distract Light from the depressing conversation, but he was also interested in the answer. 

The best thing about Light's plans was that they weren't always clear where they were going. Maybe Light-o wasn't even planning for it at all and was just going to wait to see what happened and let the chips fall where they may. He did that sometimes. 

Light blinked at the change in discussion topic before his expression cleared. "Well…" Light hummed. "I imagine it'll go just as it did before. Except, of course, for that stunt I pulled with the bus. Maybe something will change that, but we won't know until it happens." Light smiled. 

Ryuk considered that. "Do you think your efforts to work ahead in your Note is going to be wasted? You know, if your boyfriend doesn't put in the cameras the way he did before?" 

Light let out a soft laugh at the ridiculousness of the idea that his effort was wasted. "I sincerely doubt that. I don't think I've done anything that would change that . Honestly, I doubt there's much I could do to change that particular event." He confided. 

"Why's that?" Ryuk inquired, interested. He floated off of the bed and hovered above it upside down. 

"Well, it wasn't Raye's death that made him load my room up with cameras, trying to catch me doing something. Not really. It was L's interest that had piqued during the routine surveillance he was doing on all the families. As long as I still have that, he'll put the cameras in my room again. Maybe not at the same time as before, but the tipping point will have to be somewhere. Someone with that much unrestrained curiosity, matched by equally unrestricted power, wouldn't be able to let it go." 

Light smiled, a vague tinge of fondness to it as he spoke of L's antics. "It's for that reason I'm confident that even if he, for some strange reason, decides to do something other than putting the cameras in my room, he'll still do something. He won't forget about me. It would be disappointing, sure, if he doesn't put me under complete surveillance like he did last time. It would be great to have deaths continue like nothing happened and I take a break while L scrutinizes everything! Very fun." Light gave a soft laugh. "But you win some, you lose some. Besides, L never truly disappoints me." Light smiled widely at the ceiling.

Light crossed his arms behind his head in contentment. "Maybe he'll put me in prison again or chain himself to me. Who knows? Maybe he'll just stalk me and make a note of what news media I consume? We'll have to wait and see and, of course, react." His smile turned into a devious smirk at those last words. 

Met with a matching one from Ryuk. 

~ 🅚 ~  

Maybe it was all that talk about the past, but Light found himself thinking about it more as he lay in his bed that night. This time, however, his thoughts had turned towards the much more pleasant direction that he tended towards often. 

L.

The perplexing man that had captivated him for what felt like forever now. Instead of focusing on his feelings for the man this time as something else occurred to him and captured his thoughts. Casting his mind back to all he'd seen of L, he couldn't help but wonder while lying there if there wasn't more to think about when it came to the strange habits L had always displayed.  

Back when they had first met, L had represented a deviation from what was normal with his odd habits and was an annoyance as a result. At least, to the version of Light who detested anything that was beyond the limit of what he was raised with. 

After he found out that L was who he was and the man continued to make a nuisance of himself, Light more or less ignored his eccentricities to focus on the issues at hand. The bastard was making his life difficult and that was more important to him at the moment than how many sugar cubes he was currently trying to fit into his teacup. 

When Light lost his memories of being Kira, his perspective on a lot of things changed. Or reverted, depending on how one wanted to look at it. Having gotten over the initial puzzlement of L’s quirks, Light found himself unknowingly and irritatingly charmed by them. There was something that was - dare he say - cute about L’s antics...when he wasn’t in the process of being a dick to him and generally everyone else, anyway. 

L’s ritual of standing on chairs was especially adorable when the chair had wheels and he would glide around the room instead of getting up. Light felt fondness at the memory of L pouring ungodly amounts of sugar cubes into his tea and the leaning tower of sugar cubes he made on his desk was endearingly childlike from such a jaded man. Even L’s special brand of unrelenting assholery had grown on him and Light had come around to it. In the way that one came to accept the annoying flaws of the people that they love, mind. Not in the way that Light ever learned not to be annoyed by it. 

So saying, Light had transitioned through a lot of different feelings regarding L’s L-ness, but he’d never really thought about the behaviors themselves. A mistake, he now realized. One he was correcting now as he was sure that he had overlooked them too much. It wasn’t like he thought there was anything wrong with L...the man was who he was and there was nothing wrong with being different even if he came off as strange because of it. It was just...Light wanted to understand L and maybe there was no understanding it and there really was no reason for anything, but he didn’t think just ignoring his habits, even if Light thought many of them were cute, was the best way of going about it. 

L had a deficiency of people who understood and accepted him. 

It was these thoughts that propelled Light up from his bed and he ignored Ryuk’s startled questioning as he settled down in the seat at his desk, turning on his computer. Beyond the initial reasoning, Light couldn’t say what he was doing, exactly. What he was looking for or what he was hoping to find or achieve. He was just...curious about it. Light pulled up a search engine and after a brief moment of thought where he wracked his mind for something that would work as a search. Leaning towers of sugar cubes wouldn’t bring up anything helpful if he searched it, but maybe the standing on the chair thing? L did say that he had to sit like that and that it reduced his mental abilities when he sat normally. 

Nothing helpful from that either, as it turned out. Just some pictures of the act and some articles about how dangerous standing on your chair was. No scientific evidence of the claim L had made so far back now about how it helped him think better. There was also a lack of other people taking part in the ritual or he just didn’t find them if there were others. Light tried, again and again, running through whatever behaviors of L’s he could remember that sounded like they could produce something. 

It felt like a very long time before any of his searches turned up something good, but the clock on his computer told him it was barely more than ten minutes. Regardless, he finally got something. It was when Light decided to use L’s peculiar way of speaking in his search that he hit paydirt. In particular, Light was looking into the change in L’s cadence or tone of voice when speaking or the lack thereof, as it were. One of the most distinctive things Light felt that people immediately noticed and were bothered about with L, besides his appearance, was the way his voice rarely changed, no matter what he was saying or what he was talking about. 

His voice did change some , Light noticed, but it really was something that you had to spend a lot of time around the man and listening to him (as Light did on both counts, he was happy to say) in order to pick up. Actually, Light prided himself on being one of the few individuals who could immediately pick out that note of annoyance in L’s voice when he finds himself irritated by something but won’t say it. The smallest, barely-there hints of amusement in his tone were equally easy to miss if you didn’t know what his voice sounded like normally. 

Light had never before and never again ran into someone who had such difficulty (or was it just disinterest?) in having their voice change with their emotions. In fact, people usually had the opposite problem and couldn’t keep their feelings out of their voices if their lives depended on it. It was something that most people did without thinking and the fact that L didn't was very off-putting to a lot of people. There were plenty of people who had trouble putting their thoughts into words, but that was a different difficulty entirely. Anyways, it had the unfortunate side effect of making people think L had no feelings or emotions, but Light knew definitively how untrue that was. 

Because he did hear the slight rise of annoyance in L’s voice when he was faced with the likes of Matsuda or Misa. Because Light had seen the excitement in L’s movements when they hit a break in the case. Because...Light remembered the look in L’s eyes as the older man stared at him later in the investigation when he thought the teenager wasn’t looking. The looks that he caught out of the corner of his eye. 

L had just as many feelings as anyone else, he just didn’t show it as easily or in the ways that people were used to. 

What the internet search pulled up, however, was surprising. A lot of hits. That matched Light’s recollections exactly. So many that Light wondered what was up until he started reading. He was surprised by what he found, but he couldn’t say why exactly. Maybe it was some vestiges of his childhood being raised to a cookie-cutter lifestyle that it didn’t occur to him for a second before now. He was never raised to have people with different needs or things of that nature in mind and it never became truly relevant to him later in life. 

People with disabilities or neurological disorders or things of that nature. He never gave it any thought and maybe that was the more damaging thing, as it usually was. He never considered that L could simply (insofar as things of that nature could be simple) have a disorder or something along that vein. 

Apparently, difficulty moderating one’s tone and voice was a characteristic of autism, one of many. And it made so much sense as Light read. The social difficulty, fixation on facts and information, hang-ups with routines or rituals...this was all sounding achingly familiar. Light began searching specific traits he could think of that L displayed and adding autism to them in his search. 

The more he found, the more it really sounded like L was somewhere on the autism spectrum. He found something in particular that struck him as very L-ish. It was something to the effect of “people tend to speak less but their words also tend to be of a higher quality”. Which basically summed up how L spoke. He seemed more comfortable in the quiet or listening to others talk, gathering information, but he spoke at a high level and still likely got out only a fraction of his thoughts. Socialization was difficult for people with autism and took a bigger toll on them mentally than just thinking did. And it showed in how amazing L was at analysis and crime-solving but had significantly less success in the social sphere. 

Even L’s tone issues were accounted for by being autistic and the syndrome added new information that Light hadn’t considered. Light knew that L didn’t like wearing shoes, for instance, or at least chose not to do it often. His research informed him that it might be a sensory thing, as it was easy for those with autism to get sensory overload or to be easily bothered by certain sensations or textures and the feet could be particularly sensitive to this. 

Of course, like all things in this area, it was highly subjective and varied widely among individuals. Still, it got Light thinking about whether or not that had been L’s issue with wearing shoes. Maybe wearing shoes was a mixture of genuinely uncomfortable sensations and he tried to avoid it whenever possible for that reason. 

Light leaned back in his chair and went over all of the information he’d gotten. It didn’t change how he felt about L, not in the slightest, but it did grant him some more clarity about why L acted so differently in so many of his actions. In some very important ways, he was different and it would have taken constant and active effort to contort himself into acting the way the people around him did and Light already knew that L wouldn’t have thought that to be important. After all, why should he act in any other way than what made him comfortable? 

Light smiled fondly at the thought. Indeed, why should he? Other people might not want to put in the effort of understanding or accepting L for who he was, but Light always would. He just understood L slightly better now. 

Chapter Text

Raye Penbar was following him now. 

Ryuk noticed the moment the man started tailing them and immediately alerted Light to the non-issue. Light battled to keep a smile off of his face as he heard the good news. He didn’t think that his meddling with the man’s fiance and with L would change this man’s job and the whole reason for him being in Japan in the first place, but he still worried a little. The tiniest flaw in a plan, after all, could have unforeseen consequences. Light was intimately familiar with how one’s plans to move something forward could accidentally end up moving it back instead or even worse, how one’s attempts to avoid an event could end up being the thing that causes the event to happen. 

Thankfully, though, that did not seem to be the case this time and Light could breathe a sigh of relief about it. As he’d told Ryuk, it’s not like his plans to get into L’s life all hinged on that one little thing; he would have to be supremely disadvantaged or just an utter fool for that to be the case. Light was lucky enough to be in love with a man who was more determined than a bull and because of that, as long as Light can get on his radar, L will come. It was just that Raye made things easier. 

Not because Raye noticed anything about Light that would throw up red flags, but that was rather the point. Mr. Penbar was not incompetent. All in all, he seemed rather good at his job from what Light had seen in his previous life, but he was not an actual genius and L was paranoid. No, it was more than that. One could also say that L saw shadows everywhere or that he hated taking things at face value and those would both be correct too, but it didn’t encapsulate all of what made L such a good detective compared to these perfectly serviceable FBI agents that he had investigating. 

L was distrustful of other people, incredibly so. He was possessed of the belief that humans were naturally deceptive beings and as such, he could never trust that they were being truthful at any given time. The usual fallacy of using the known fact that people could be a certain way, to make the leap of saying they could always be like that. Light personally felt that L thought this way because L himself was such a liar. 

At any rate, far from taking things at face value, L analysed everything and everyone and if he found anything that set him off, he’d investigate them until either he loses his mind or they do and, really, it’s usually them. As long as something set L off, he’d chase the subject down and that was what made Light confident that nothing would distract L completely from him if Light had succeeded in getting his attention. One thing that Light had found especially striking at the time that he had heard it in his past life was that even not seeing something worrying in someone’s behavior was enough to set L off. Something they weren't doing.

Really, what it came down to was whether the person was acting as L thought they should be. L would leave some people alone but badger others seemingly without clear reason, but in the end, it was always about what was going on in L’s mind. Less than the person’s own behavior, whether or not L would take a strong interest in someone was always down to his own interpretation of how this particular person should be behaving and whether or not they violated it. Light had incorporated that observation into his scheme to pique L’s interest when he’d brought Naomi Misora to him. 

Light put himself in L’s way by doing that, forcing the man to notice him, but the thing that would be most likely to make him stay in the man’s notice is how innocent he acted. In the future past, L had thought that Light shouldn’t be so innocent, so above reproach, and that incited his interest. Hopefully, it would do so again. Whether it was Light himself, his age, or something else, L was of the firm opinion that innocence did not become Light and so the more virtuous he acted (and the more virtuous other people perceived him to be), the more upset L should get. 

As long as that one line of planning worked out, then Light wouldn’t have to go to extremes to get the man to look at him. Probably better for everyone involved, that. 

So saying, he didn’t really need Mr. Penbar, but he could still use him, which was why Light was happy the man was following him. Despite what Ryuk had been hoping for, Light wasn’t going to do a damn thing with Penbar watching; he didn’t need to. He’d written ahead plenty of names into his Death Note, making sure that all of them deserved to be there. It was the product of a constant effort over a long period of time, instead of the crazy binge of random names that it would’ve been in his past life. 

Really, Light benefitted from having the names written ahead in his note on multiple levels. He still hoped that L would go through with the massive surveillance, but even still, he didn’t have to think about writing in his note or having Ryuk do it and doing research all while Penbar is stalking him because of the names he’d written. If he had an accident or was imprisoned like he was last time, same difference. 

A benefit of not going on a killing rampage was that he didn’t kill in the kind of proportions he used to and that he didn’t have any kind of routine or schedule for when he writes them down when he feels comfortable making a decision on a name is when he writes it down and that varies wildly. Those two things meant that the names he wrote ahead in his Note stretched well into the future...he had years worth of names written down. Then again, that wasn’t hard when he didn’t kill every day or even every week, at times. He tried to keep his inconsistent schedule when writing names ahead, so L wouldn’t have a hint of anything different, should it come to that.

Ryuk had wanted Light to pull something with Raye, something that would be entertaining. Not killing him, obviously, but to have some fun. Light vetoed that, though. He figured the normalcy of Light’s life that Raye would report back would be enough to bother L and it wasn’t like any of the FBI investigators would find anything any more worthwhile if they were to live, unlike last time. Maybe, by some chance, someone they were set to investigate would be a criminal or doing something illegal, but they won’t find Kira. L will be forced, like he had been before, to look more into the situation himself, especially if he feels certain that Kira is actually one of these people that are being investigated and is just lying low. He'll be forced by circumstance to look more into Light. 

Light wasn’t going to do anything to make himself look suspicious during this particular stakeout, which was why his next little order of business would be done once he was inside his school. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light’s main center of operation was his home and, in particular, his bedroom, but he did occasionally deem his school an appropriate place to work on certain things. 

Light could do any work using his phone in the hallways or other social areas and then do anything that involves writing on paper in the classrooms. Light always had the preternatural ability to pay enough attention to what people were talking about around him and respond to it even while he was mostly daydreaming or scheming. He could get lost in his own head and still be able to respond to the teacher in class. When Light was on his phone outside of class, he was working on his new passion project; creating an even larger fanbase for Kira. 

Light knew as well as anyone these days that people could be insane lunatics. He himself was one near the end of his life. Kira attracted posers and fanatics alike, people who jumped on a bandwagon to justify their own egregious acts or who wanted something bigger than them to believe in so much that they would overlook their idol’s behavior no matter how terrible it gets and climb over themselves to blame the victims of those behaviors. Light was no longer under the delusions that: a) People who support Kira were necessarily good people, and b) That good people would always support Kira. 

However, the way Light now saw it, those people were going to act that way, anyway. Maybe having an idol or a law or majority support would increase it, but there will always be people who will act this way and do terrible things without cause. Despite what he’d previously thought, you cannot clean up the world. Light was doing this now because he could save some lives this way and it was in his blood now. He was Kira. 

But he didn’t have a savior complex anymore. Maybe Light was wrong and he would love to be that, where this was concerned, but he thought that humanity couldn’t have true peace as long as it existed. If you wanted that uncompromisingly, then you had to wipe out humanity. A shinigami’s point of view tended to be depressingly realistic at times, however it had its benefits. It allowed him to go online to pump up Kira without feeling like he was creating those maniacs. 

Using his time in-between classes during school, Light created a Kira Fansite that L would be unlikely to be able to prove was him. The idea for it was a stroke of genius and the end result was a thing of beauty. It was easy to use but not offensively simple and it had an ivory and black color scheme. The color scheme was mostly the product of him not wanting to pander to either of the crazies he knew Kira would attract, the people who saw Kira as a perfect being or the ones that just wanted to run crazy. He figured ivory would be too pure and godly and mostly black would be too edgy (or trying to be, at any rate) and he really couldn’t see a website with colors like purple or blue, so he combined the two. 

He smiled at how the whole site looked, but what was written on it was better. The whole genius of the idea was what it was used for, spreading Kira’s “beliefs”. A person could go on there and find out anything they would want to know about Kira without relying on hearsay to get information. More to the point, its existence would piss off anyone in a position of power, and - he was hoping - L. Light couldn’t wait until someone got his website taken down so he could put it right back up again!

~ 🅚 ~

L was incredibly dissatisfied. No, that felt like an understatement. He couldn't say what he was expecting, he shouldn't have reasonably been expecting anything, but he didn't get whatever it was and it was putting him into a funk.

Nothing. Absolutely nothing from any of the agents sent to investigate the families. Evidently, none of the agents thought the individuals under their care were suspicious and in most of those cases, L would have been inclined to agree. In fact, he'd done preliminary research into each person who would be under surveillance and none of them struck him as more than ordinary and he'd be hard-pressed to consider them as Kira potential. There was, however, one exception and that was the source of his current discontent. 

In point of fact, Light Yagami had come out of nowhere. He'd inserted himself into L's realm of the investigation and then wisped away just as quickly, but L couldn't seem to forget about the almost encounter. Light was the only individual among those being investigated that L had been hopeful for. From his research, Light Yagami was intelligent and he suspected he was cunning, as well. Light's very demeanor seemed to draw L's attention, for reasons he couldn't identify. He was frustrated that Naomi's fiance didn't seem to think the same.

In truth, L had no true reason for suspecting Light of...something. There were no red flags in Light's behavior that said that he was someone dangerous. There was his seeming lack of social ties, which may indicate an antisocial personality disorder of some kind, but nothing that could be deemed even relatively conclusive. 

Light seemed perfect in every respect. He was an intelligent, well-mannered, high-achieving teenager who seemed close to his family and was following in his father's footsteps well. 

Maybe that's the problem, L mused as he picked up a strawberry and stuck it into his mouth. A perfect child like that doesn't exist. There had to be something wrong with Light Yagami, there just had to be, and normally L would consider more mundane faults like dirty magazines or smoking behind his school, but the timing of Light showing up seemed far too coincidental. It begged for him to take a more serious view of what Light might be hiding. 

Could it really be coincidence that Light just happened to be in the center of the Investigation in such an incidental way and then disappear from it? Even as he asked himself that, he already knew the answer. It wasn't impossible, but he really couldn't reconcile it being happenstance. What did that mean, then? Was there any possible way that Light could have engineered it? And if so, for what purpose? 

L clicked through the report that had been emailed to him on Light Yagami. Again. Agent Penbar was very organized in both his observations and the structure of his report, L noted. He did seem to be very good at his job and L could see why he had been one of the agents sent by the FBI. The only thing that disappointed L was the lack of suspicion the report ultimately pointed towards the young Yagami. 

Agent Penbar made note of all of Light’s interactions, habits, and trips. The boy’s schedule was well-documented and rarely differed. In the end, the agent had concluded that Light was a relatively ordinary boy and besides being diligent in his studies, there was nothing interesting about him. L bit his nail in frustration as he scowled at that particular line. There was no damn way that could be true. It wasn’t that he thought the agent incompetent, but there was only so much you could learn about a person by following them between their school and home. So much happened where you wouldn’t be able to see, especially if the person was clever at hiding. 

And Kira was . 

There was one part of the agent’s report, near the end, that got L’s brain churning faster. It was a small comment. Innocuous, really. The agent didn’t give it any particular importance and seemed to tack it on at the end without a thought. The words “he spends almost all of his time at home in his room” sat on the screen, looking back at him. 

What could be made of that? Well, L had no answers, but he certainly had questions. What was the boy doing in his room all day every day? Was he just being a sulky teenager, trying to get distance from his family? Nothing about his behavior suggested that, though, and certainly, none of his conversations with the elder Yagami did. Although, he supposed, as honest as Yagami appeared, he might feel the desire to smooth over any flaws he sees in his son in a business setting, to give off the best impression of his family. 

….L wasn’t satisfied, not in the slightest. He couldn’t accept it and now he had the enticing information that Light spent quite a large amount of his non-school hours closed up in his room. He felt closer to something than before, but not close enough. Like a fly on the wall of an outer chamber, he was close enough to get the hints of something that beckoned him to get closer and yet nothing definitive. Little bits of information that created an itch in his brain to know more. 

He might be rushing to conclusions, it might be too early to say that Light Yagami is Kira. He truly didn’t know if that was the case or not. 

What he did know was that this teenager was the closest he had gotten so far to a viable suspect and said teenager just happened to slip into the realm of the investigation as none of the other people being investigated had. 

L had always liked a challenge, it was the reason he’d gone after Kira in the first place. Light Yagami, similarly, was presenting a challenge. Was he just an ordinary high school student who happened to be unlucky enough to look like a suspect or was he something else? L needed to know. He needed more information and for that, he needed to set up more surveillance. He would have to decide his next step in that direction, because…

Because Light Yagami…

...was interesting. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light didn’t immediately notice when Raye stopped following him, partly because he was ignoring the man and partly because he’d slid back easily into the habit of refraining from doing anything suspicious in public spaces. Ryuk had to be the one who pointed out his lack of a tail, which Light was grateful for, but it wasn’t like it changed anything. 

What was Light going to do that was dangerous in-between his house and his school that would scream Kira to someone besides L? And really, after a certain point, breathing would make L think he was Kira. All the better, he supposed. 

Anyway, since nothing had happened during the following stint, Light had to conclude that Raye hadn’t seen anything suspicious and had ended the surveillance after that. He could have Ryuk check out L's side of the investigation later to see what the results of that would be. He didn't need to think about it any more than that, he decided and turned his mind to other things. 

Something was also distracting him a little, which was why he maybe didn’t realize that Raye had dipped out. It wasn’t something he was doing, more something he was feeling. It had been going on since a few days after Agent Penbar started following him and it really was starting to bug him. Light felt sure that he was forgetting something. For the life of him, he couldn’t guess at what , but he’d been getting the intense feeling lately that he’d forgotten something. 

At first, Light thought that it was some small chore, something unimportant that he would either remember soon or forget about entirely, but the feeling persisted over a large amount of time without Light getting any closer to remembering what it was.

Light began to use his free time to try and remember whatever he was forgetting. He would talk about it with Ryuk in his room and wonder about it on his way to and from school and get no closer to an answer, to scratching that persistent itch in the back of his mind. He was determined to figure it out, eventually. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light dropped his pencil in class as his whole body froze, not even noticing his teacher asking him in a confused manner if he was going to pick it up. Light’s golden eyes stared forward towards the front of the classroom, unseeing. Only one thing going through his head: 

I forgot about Misa. 

Chapter Text

Light...didn’t like Misa. He really, really didn’t. There had been a brief moment - upon remembering her - where he entertained guilt about how he had treated her, but the more he thought about it, the less he felt towards her at all. To him, she was the woman who’d forced him into being in a relationship and nearly got him killed with her incompetence on several occasions. 

Light wasn’t interested in pretending that his behavior towards her (as it had been with everyone else) wasn't abhorrent, but unlike many others, he wasn’t willing to think that her behavior made her deserve any better from him. He’d treated many people badly who deserved better, but he found it difficult - incredibly difficult - to believe she was one of them. After all, the way she'd behaved herself was…it defied words, at many times. She’d treated him like a God, that was true, but that absolute worship hid the truly disturbing things she did to him. 

Not only did she insert herself into his life, completely unbidden, but she came to his house when his family was there and lied to get in. A stranger…just showing up at your house when you're with your family. The fact that she thought that was okay was the tamest of the red flags that would shoot up. Light found himself drawn in by the idea of being able to use Misa and her Shinigami to help him in his mission, but that didn’t change the fact that he was disinterested in doing even that at the beginning of their conversation. 

It wasn’t…it wasn’t as if he’d leapt on her and Rem immediately. Rather, he’d tried to turn her away and talk her out of it at first. As usual, he was hesitant around an unknown element and so he didn’t simply kick her out, but that was what he was trying to do. But the threat was made clear soon. Rem wouldn’t allow anything that made Misa unhappy and if Light didn’t date her, he would become one of those things. Maybe even Misa might not be able to stop Rem from killing him then…or worse. 

Considering Misa herself quickly threatened to kill any innocent girls she saw him with (clearly not caring if Light himself cared about them), he realized that he could be forced to be with Misa one way or another with Rem’s help…so he decided to do it on his terms. He’d always felt the need in that life to have power and control, so the idea of having it taken from him in such a way alarmed him in a way that he wasn’t able to assess at the time. Misa wouldn’t be reasoned with, either. She was desperate. 

The way she treated people’s lives like they didn’t matter in the slightest was truly sickening, considering her story about how her parents were killed. It wasn’t even all at Light’s bidding. The worst abuses of life she committed were completely of her own volition. Before she showed up in front of Light, under the guise of the Second Kira, she killed off innocuous members of the media who had never done anything to anybody just to prove she could kill people. 

Light himself never dealt with tragedy the way Misa did so maybe he shouldn't speak about it, but one would think Misa would be extra sympathetic to hurting people, seeing how she was hurt in such a similar way. Instead, she killed police officers for the same reason as the media, just to prove a point. None of these people mattered to her and she thus showed herself to be just as bad as - if not worse than - the person who killed her family. That level of selfishness had no excuse, no good reason if she thought the person who killed her parents deserved to be punished. Either she believed killing innocent people was wrong or she didn’t. In fact, Misa’s hypocrisy was uniquely horrifying when considering her past experiences and what she would go on to do. Everyone could be hypocritical sometimes (Light especially thought he'd been), but not all people were victims of violent stalkers and then turned around and proceeded to violently stalk someone. Normally, people do not have terrible experiences with being the victims of a crime and then completely excuse in their heads committing that same crime on other people. But then, he supposed, such was humanity. Humans were strange like that. 

Funnily enough, her death threat wasn’t even the scariest thing that she’d said to him, in his mind. No, that title went to when she said that she could make him love her. That…said a lot. Both, how she viewed relationships and how she viewed him. Maybe Light was looking too much into it but remembering that line and everything she had ever said or done, he felt like he appeared to her like some kind of doll. 

A doll…something that could be manipulated and moved. Something without strong feelings of its own. Misa…always acted like if he felt something or did something she didn’t like, it was her fault. On someone else, that would look self-deprecating, but it might have said something else. In her way, she was denying him his own will in a very insidious way. If she told herself that everything he did or didn’t do was in reaction to herself, she deprived Light of his own reasoning and beliefs. She could allow herself to think that if she did this or that, she could change big things about him as if he wasn’t his own person but just a living reaction to her. 

Again, maybe he was looking too much into it, he told himself. Still, he couldn’t help that creeping feeling in his flesh as he thought about their previous relationship, that feeling of someone trying to write over him. From beginning to end, Misa treated him like he could be changed to suit her needs. She wanted someone to take care of her and she’d decided that was Kira and then that it was Light himself. She wanted to be taken care of and she did what he told her to because she wanted to get that care. Just another person who put their stresses onto him, only her way of doing so was far more toxic than his family’s had ever been. 

In the end, with how Light was back then, the two of them had deserved each other. Light, with his selfish user behavior and then ignoring her when noticing her was inconvenient, and Misa, with her violent possessiveness that threatened to destroy him in her quest to have him. The two of them were terrible and they would only have destroyed their partner if they had been with anyone else besides the other. 

But things were different now. Light could ponder Misa’s psychology and deduce why she made him as viscerally uncomfortable as she now did, but that wouldn’t change the situation. Light had changed so much from who he had once been and if Misa had been a chore for him before, then the idea of being with her now was truly sickening. He loved L more than anything and if Misa were to try being his girlfriend again, she might see him as a threat if she found out about it. Even without her Death Note–

Light froze. “Ryuk!” Light cried out, whirling on his heel to face his bed, where his friend had been hovering and watching him. 

At his cry, Ryuk wobbled unsteadily in the air in surprise. “Yeah, Light?” Ryuk questioned, as he steadied himself. 

“Rem. The Death Note she gave to Misa. Are they still in play?” Light asked, shortly. 

Ryuk’s eyes lit up in understanding. “Excellent question, Light. No, they’re not. Rem died in the original timeline and she wasn’t part of this world, so she didn’t come back when this world’s time was rewound. Her Death Note was long ago returned to the Shinigami King, as all owner-less Death Notes eventually are.” He told Light, proudly. 

Light blinked in shock, taking that in. So Rem was gone…because Shinigami weren’t affected by time in the human realm…of course! “Then Gelus must also…” He whispered. 

Ryuk let out a rocky laugh. “Of course, Light-o! Clever as always! Both of them are dead as doornails!” He proclaimed, happily. He’d never known Gelus and he did not particularly like Rem, so all he felt was amusement. “He won’t be able to save Misa this time. Do you think she’s already dead?” He asked, curiously. 

“No.” Light replied, distractedly. “I remember her mentioning once the man that Kira killed who was on trial for killing her parents. I think it was just a short while back. She said that she was nearly killed by a stalker a little over a month after that, and I think I recall…” Light drew off as he whirled around and stood at his computer as he quickly turned it on. His fingers flew across the keys as he typed in a case he suddenly remembered from a little under a month ago. 

Westley Borne . Yes, he remembered him. Accused of killing a couple in their own home in a failed home invasion, witnessed by their teenaged daughter. He had evidently been a neighbor and thought he had an opportunity while they were out, only for it to turn out to be the biggest mistake of his life. For privacy, no one besides him had been named in the media and Light hadn’t needed to hack the court records to find the man’s guilt. 

A combination of looking at all the facts of the case, the lack of an alibi for him, and Ryuk’s kind offer to follow him had allowed Light to be sure he was guilty. It never ceased to amaze Light how much a person’s behavior could change when they thought they were alone and how much it could reveal about them as a person. 

The trial was dragging on, too. Having a large amount of circumstantial evidence only was often the reason why people failed to be convicted, Light found. In this case, even having a witness was proving to not be enough because it was her word against his, and witness testimonies were notoriously flawed. There was no DNA evidence which would’ve been one of the only things that tied him objectively to the crime and Light could guess at how good his lawyer was. 

As the trial dragged on, the clearly traumatized daughter was likely suffering greatly and the situation got worse. Because what was going on in the actual courtroom was secret for the moment, the news media had to come up with their own ideas of what was happening and as the trial drew on without the man being convicted, the news posited that the man might be innocent and that rumor spread. 

It must have been absolutely miserable for the girl and it might end with the man being found Not Guilty…so that was when Light stepped in. If Light had remembered Misa for five minutes, he might have recognized the case or at least looked into the actual names of the people involved besides the defendant. 

So he had already taken out the man who’d killed Misa’s parents, it was too late to let the court system handle (or fail to handle) that particular grenade. The incident that had caused Misa’s hero-worship of Kira had already happened. Well…hell. What was he going to do now?

“You could just let her die,” Ryuk said, apparently following his thoughts through his expressions. “You didn’t save her in the last timeline, so you wouldn’t be changing anything you did…not that you’ve had a problem with that, anyway. Gelus is gone, so all you have to do is wait for nature to take its course. She was supposed to die in that encounter in the original timeline.” 

That’s right… It was easy to forget that little fact in the sea of information, but it was worth noting. The reason Gelus had died when he’d saved Misa before was because she had been meant to die. Her lifespan had almost been up, but Gelus couldn’t accept that. It was strange to think that Light would never have meant her and she never would have forced herself into his life if Gelus had just minded his own business…

Could he just turn his back? He really wanted to. His Shinigami self said that she was supposed to die to begin with and that she was going to do nothing good for anybody in her life, anyway. All humans died eventually. 

And yet…there was a part of him that felt bad about how he had used her. He was given little choice in the past to use her, but his lack of guilt over it then caused him guilt now. Wouldn’t he be continuing what he had done back then if he just let her die? Using her when it's convenient and throwing her under the bus when that's convenient? 

No, Light sighed. He really couldn’t do that. But…he was still creeped out by her. He didn’t think that his past offenses should force him to be near her when she too had done so much to hurt him, abusing him in different but similar ways to how he had abused her. As well, she had fallen in love with “Light Yagami” at first sight. She had loved his looks and the idea of him, as much as the idea of Kira. If she saw him again, he suspected he knew what would happen. It didn’t really matter if she didn’t have a Death Note, although it made her less dangerous. 

So…what did he do? 

What…

Oh. 

Oh, maybe…yes, that could work! “Ryuk!” Light yelled again, whirling on the Shinigami. 

“What, Light-o?!” Ryuk startled again. "You've really got to stop doing that!" 

“I’m going to save Misa in Gelus’ place.” Light declared without hesitation. 

“What?!” Ryuk teetered dangerously where he was reclining in the air. “Are you sure??” 

“As sure as I can get.” Light responded without hesitation. 

“But there’s no reason for it! She could easily cause you trouble again!” Ryuk objected, incredulous. 

“Without Rem, it’ll be difficult for her to reach the threat level she was at before.” Light mused. “Besides, I have an idea.” 

Ryuk froze mid-argument. “...an idea?” 

Light gave his friend a smile and nodded. “She fell in love with Light Yagami, even over the idea of Kira, because she saw me and thought I looked perfect.” Light ignored the chill that went through his body at the thought. “So I just have to try and make sure she doesn’t see me. It won’t be easy , but…” 

“What about Kira?” Ryuk tilted his head. “If you save her as Kira, she will be crazy for them just like before. She might not be able to find you without having a Death Note of her own, but she could still show up in Japan and cause trouble trying.” 

Light nodded. “Unless…we give her a fake Kira to distract her from looking. If she thinks she’s found Kira, she might not like him as much as she liked me, but she at least won’t go looking for me. He’ll be able to handle her better than I did, anyway.” 

“‘Him’? You have someone in mind?” Ryuk blinked as he slowly came to a conclusion. “Wait, you don’t mean–” 

“That’s right!” Light smiled, brightly. “I just have to make Misa think that L is Kira!” 

~ 🅚 ~

Naomi wasn’t sure what to do with her life now. 

There had been a time, only a week ago, where she’d known exactly where her life was going. She was going to get married, become a housewife, and raise a family. She’d been excited, she’d been looking forward to it. 

But had she, though?

Light Yagami. She’d barely been with the boy for an hour and yet his words still hung in her mind. Light Yagami was a very striking person, wasn’t he? Some people, you could just tell that they were meant for great things and Light was. He was also very mature for his age and he asked her things she wasn’t sure she could answer. For example…

Was she really looking forward to the life she’d imagined with Raye or was she just afraid to think too hard about it? The life Raye had imagined for them. As uncomfortable as thinking about it made her, Naomi couldn’t stop and the more she thought about it, the more aware she became of the fact that it was Raye who had put together the picture of their future. All of the things they were planning on doing were his ideas. 

When did she leave herself behind to pursue them? 

Light had been so gentle when he’d questioned her and yet each thing he said had hit a nerve. She was questioning everything now, something she’d refrained from doing for what felt like too long now. She’d fought with Raye that morning about it and he’d stormed out of the house, leaving her behind with her thoughts. 

Naomi didn’t know what to do with herself anymore. More and more, she was questioning whether she was right to quit her job. At the time, it had been one of the hardest things she’d ever done, but she’d convinced herself that quitting her job was making way for a brighter future for her. A beautiful home, a loving husband, and excitable children. It isn’t, she told herself as she sat at the dining table of their rental apartment alone. Like I don’t want those things. It sounds amazing and I’d be happy to have them, but… 

But her job had made her happy, too. 

Naomi checked the clock. It was early morning and they’d both slept badly. More importantly, she wondered when Raye was coming back. He’d been gone a while. Should she wait for him before doing anything? But why? She didn’t feel like she’d make a decision she liked if she talked to him about it, anyway. 

Without another moment’s hesitation, Naomi went to their shared bedroom and picked up her purse. From it, she pulled the phone she was given specifically by Watari in case she decided to participate in the investigation. She sent a text that she would accept the position, using the exact words she was told to use in the event and barely two seconds passed before she got a confirmation text and the information that Watari would pick her up tomorrow and at what time. 

Letting out a deep, relieved breath, Naomi sat in a chair and leaned back. She’d done it and it felt so good! She already felt her body buzzing with the excitement of getting on a new case and the whirling of her brain as she turned over what she knew about Kira and what she might discover. She was back in the game!

~ 🅚 ~

Raye Penbar didn’t know what was going on lately. He and Naomi had had a big fight and he’d left for a breather. He just couldn’t understand why they were fighting, though. She was saying all sorts of things about wanting to join the Kira investigation and when he pointed out that she wasn’t an investigator anymore, she sounded like she deeply regretted the fact. 

Why, though? Hadn’t they agreed that it would be best if she quit? Hadn’t they both decided that her life would be at home with their family from that point onward? He didn’t understand where all this was coming from, suddenly. 

…He still felt bad about leaving her back there, though. Even if he was frustrated and needed a moment, now that he’d had it, he felt like he should have stayed there with her and talked it out. They should have come to an understanding and now here he was, wandering around in the early morning in the Kanto region of Japan with even the sun barely up, and all he felt was confusion and uncertainty. 

I should go back. He decided. We should talk. Maybe if they did that, he could get to the bottom of what was making her so anxious and reassure her that it wasn’t as big a deal as she thought it was. 

Just as Raye was about to turn around, a slightly smaller arm caught him right above his elbow. Whirling around in surprise, Raye stared at the person in front of him. 

What is a teenager doing out in the streets this early? 

~ 🅚 ~

Confusingly, a handful of minutes after she sent her text, the same phone rang and Naomi hurried to answer it. Why call, though? She couldn’t help wondering. They already said they were going to pick me up tomorrow…

“Misora.” She answered. 

“Ms. Misora, I’m afraid we have some terrible news. We’re sending a car to pick you up right away.” Watari’s voice came out clearly through the phone, his words causing an unpleasant thump of Naomi’s heart. 

“What’s going on?” Her voice shook almost imperceptibly as she spoke. 

“We just got a blackmail letter delivered to our location, threatening the life of one of the FBI agents working for us if we don’t meet their demands. L believes it to be the work of Kira.” The old man audibly drew in a breath. “...it’s your fiance, Agent Penbar. Ms. Misora, do you have any idea where your fiance is right now?” 

Naomi’s fingers quivered where she held the phone to her ear. 

No…she didn’t. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light grumbled indecipherable nonsense as he flopped around in his bed, trying to reach his cell phone which was ringing on his bedside table. Finally, he managed to grab it, he quickly glanced at the Caller ID before deciding he’d answer even if he didn’t recognize the number calling him and put the phone to his ear. “...hello?” He whispered hoarsely. How early was it? 

“Light! I’m so sorry to bother you, but…” Light’s eyes popped open, defying his exhaustion. Why was Naomi calling him and how? He didn’t give her his number. He’d sort of hoped he’d run into her plenty during the investigation, so giving her number was unnecessary. 

“Ms. Misora..? What’s going on?” She sounded panicked, he realized as his brain started coming back online. Scared. 

“I’m sorry for bothering you so early like this and I know you have nothing to do with the Kira Investigation…” She apologized again. “But I couldn’t resist. I felt like I had to ask you in particular for help, you were so insightful before.” 

“It’s fine if you need my help, but about what?” Light asked, so very confused. Whatever he could’ve expected, it wasn’t what she said. Light experienced a short moment of shock as he processed it and then he shot up in bed. 

“Wait!” He yelled, startling Ryuk off the bed as he did. “Kira did what? ”

Chapter Text

Light shivered slightly in the early morning cold as he made his way down the street. This was supposedly the time and place where Raye Penbar was kidnapped. So…he disappeared from this street. Light thought to himself as his eyes steadily roamed the area. 

“What are you looking for?” Ryuk asked, flying behind him as usual. 

“I don’t know.” Light admitted. “I don’t even know what happened, besides the fact that I’m being blamed for it.”

 He had made a meeting with Naomi soon. They would meet at a and talk over the case. After she called him the previous morning, she said that she was going to be picked up and brought to L so that she could be informed about what they knew and offered a part in the investigation so they couldn’t meet that day. Since she’d asked Light for his aid, she agreed that she would tell him everything she knew the next day. As it stood, he only currently knew that this was where it happened and the rough timeframe it happened in. 

“Who would want to kidnap Raye Penbar?” Light pondered the unanswerable question. “He doesn’t even live here normally, he’s a foreigner. Could someone have followed him here from America?” 

He had some time before he needed to be at the apartment she was staying in. He might have been lingering a bit too long, but he was borderline desperate to find something that could make sense of what was going on here. 

And what was up with that letter? Light thought, aggressively. 

He knew next to nothing about the contents of the letter, just that it existed and that it was some kind of blackmail letter. Something leveraging Raye Penbar’s life against the Kira Investigation. 

Is it some of Kira’s supporters? Light wondered before shaking his head. It won’t do any good wildly cycling through theories. I need to stay focused. Naomi asked for my help and I do want to solve this for her, but even more than that…

L might not solve this on his own. From his brief phone call with Naomi, he knew that he was already being blamed for this, even without anything concrete tying him to it. And L…L was like a dog with a bone. If he’d already gotten it in his head that it was Kira, as it seemed he now had, then Light couldn’t delude himself into having faith that the man would ever extricate himself from that hole. Once an idea was in that man’s head, it was absolutely hellish trying to get it out again. 

Sighing, Light cast one last lingering look around the desolate area and again started his progress towards where Naomi said her rental was.

~ 🅚 ~

Light knocked on the door of the rental apartment, mentally checking he’d gotten the place right. It would be awkward, otherwise. Thankfully, he didn’t need to worry about that for long, as the door was practically wrenched open with a worried and hopeful-looking Naomi standing in the doorway. Once she saw Light, her features lit up and she gave a relieved smile. 

“Light! Thank you for coming, I know it’s early.” She said, sounding a little apologetic. She immediately stepped aside and ushered Light into the apartment, closing the door behind them. 

“It’s alright. I would’ve wanted to come here early anyway.” Light assured as he took his coat off. “And I imagine you’re feeling antsy, eager to make some progress. I’m so sorry about your fiance.” 

Naomi gave a shaky sigh. “I just wish I knew whether he was safe or not. I know L got that note, but all I can think of is that it doesn’t prove anything. He could still be…” She drew off, unwilling to say it yet. 

“I really am sorry about this.” Light turned to her. He placed his hands on both of her shoulders and looked directly into her eyes, trying to get his sincerity across to her. “But I swear that I will do whatever I can to help the both of you.” 

Naomi stared right back at him for what felt like an hour before her expression crumbled slightly. She didn’t look like she altogether knew how to handle Light’s support, but he caught a mixture of surprise, relief, and appreciation. Still, she was holding herself together very well throughout this whole ordeal and ultimately managed a determined nod in response. “We should sit down and talk, then.” She directed him over to the sitting room. Finally, Light was going to get to hear more about the investigation. 

Light controlled the urge to sigh as he thought about what L might have said regarding his suspicions. This was going to be a trial. Light knew L better than almost anyone, he felt. L would probably fail to think properly about the possibility of Kira not being involved. He’d rather chase down every way that Kira could have done this than spend five minutes on the “slim” chance it wasn’t Kira. 

~ 🅚 ~

L was sure this was the work of Kira. 

Nothing else made sense. Clearly, Kira was feeling threatened by the investigation and this was the result, Raye Penbar’s death. Well, L didn’t actually know that Mr. Penbar was dead, but the chances of his survival were dismal. After all, he was an FBI agent. 

Hardly the kind of person that could be kidnapped so easily, which made the chances that Kira used their power to control individuals before their death to abduct Agent Penbar. It was unknown if Kira could control someone without killing them, but so far, the only instances they had of Kira controlling someone resulted in their deaths. Kira could very well have done that and then proceeded to pretend that Penbar was still alive to use against the investigation. 

L couldn’t proceed under that assumption, though. If there was a chance that Agent Penbar was still alive, he was obligated to try and preserve that life. As well, neither Naomi nor the officers he was currently working with would be comfortable operating under such an assumption. Naomi, as his fiance, L could accept. It must be very hard for her. 

However, he found himself frequently annoyed by the men he was working with. Their emotions were so wild and their sensibilities so soft that L wondered how they survived in this line of work, at all. Only Chief Yagami seemed to be able to steel himself properly and it showed when L was forced to tell them about the FBI’s presence in Japan the day before. He really hadn’t had much of a choice in that regard. L couldn’t keep this a secret from the rest of the investigators very easily and there were, of course, additional reasons that he chose to be out with it. 

As expected, there was a huge blowup from the group at large. The dullards made all sorts of loud demands or just took the opportunity to yell at him. L, with the utmost calm, let them do it as he popped a candy into his mouth every so often. He never stopped staring at his laptop, their collective tantrum didn’t deserve that much attention from him. Aizawa was particularly riled by his lack of attention, but the police chief was able to get him back in line before he did something quite unfortunate. 

Chief Yagami had actually been very understanding about why he took the actions that he did, explaining the reasoning behind L’s actions so that he didn’t need to do it himself. L appreciated that, especially as his weighing in caused the other investigators to fall in line and the group could finally continue on in their conversation. The group was galvanized before Naomi arrived at the hotel, absolutely ready to find the missing FBI agent. Sadly…they didn’t have much by the end of that meeting and Naomi, in a move that L hadn’t expected, declined the offer to stay over for the night, insisting that it would be better for her to go home. 

It was the next day and L found himself reduced to pouring over the note they’d received that had first alerted them to the danger posed to the agent. The words and language used wasn’t anything special - in fact, he was almost inclined to call it overly simple - and it didn’t give away much. The demands didn’t appear to make any sense, either. 

The language used in this part of the letter came across as clustered and confused as if the writer was uncomfortable as they wrote it, but it basically amounted to calling off their investigation. It was especially strange because Kira if they wrote it, should know that there was no way L would or even could simply disband the Kira Investigation. 

It was difficult for L to wrap his mind around, but he eventually came to the conclusion that Kira was trying to confuse him. It was certainly working, L was more baffled by the moment as he looked into this recent development in the investigation. Kira possibly wanted L to be deterred from the idea that it was them so that the detective would waste time chasing down other leads while Kira did…something. He would find out what and hopefully with it, find Kira.  

L grit his teeth. At this rate, he was going to need to come forward to the Japanese police about his burgeoning suspicions regarding Light Yagami. He didn’t want to bring the boy up until he had gathered more information on him, but he may be left with no choice due to this incident. Not if he wanted to find who was behind the attack on Penbar, at any rate. 

Even if he hadn’t already had some ill-defined suspicions about the younger Yagami, the boy definitely would have come into the center of this whole thing when Agent Penbar went missing. After all, aside from one other family, the only family that this particular agent had been assigned to was the Yagamis. It was wholly too suspicious that Agent Penbar had just finished his surveillance on Light Yagami and turned in his report shortly before he was kidnapped. 

How could Light Yagami have nothing to do with this? He couldn’t believe it was nothing to do with the boy who had raised so many questions in his mind with just the one pseudo-enocunter, but he would admit to not having enough information. He wasn’t certain that the younger Yagami had something to do with Kira or indeed was Kira himself, but at the moment he was the only person who L felt was truly suspicious. 

If there was a chance he was involved, then L wanted to know in what way and how much. Time was of the essence in these sorts of situations, L knew this deeply. If they didn’t uncover any new information relating to Agent Penbar’s disappearance, then L would need to bring to Chief Yagami’s attention the questions regarding his son. 

After all, with the Japanese police working so closely with him on this, it would only burn his bridges if he set up surveillance in the home of the Chief of Police without notifying him first. 

~ 🅚 ~

“And that is what we know about it so far. Not much, I know.” Naomi admitted once she was done catching Light up on everything the team had gone through the day before. 

Light considered it all. Her fiance had basically disappeared without a trace and he had already told Naomi that he didn't think anyone in particular was Kira, so he had no suspicions. 

“But Naomi, it might not even be Kira.” Light started, gently. He knew that he couldn’t be too insistent about this or it would come off as incredibly odd. He didn’t want to raise any alarm with this. 

Naomi startled and looked at him with wide eyes. “What are you talking about? Of course, it’s Kira! He-He was here to investigate Kira, how could it be anyone else?” She looked genuinely confused. 

“I just think that it would be a mistake to blind ourselves to any of the other possibilities. Kira is not the only criminal in the world, not by a long shot.” 

“Still, it doesn’t make sense for anyone else to…” Naomi interjected, but Light gently cut her off before she could continue down that line of thinking. 

“I really think that the world doesn’t always make sense. The universe and humans are chaotic, they don’t always act the way you think they should.” Light informed her, some of his Shinigami poking through and she felt almost pinned by his gaze. “I know it might not be the first thought on the mind, but there’s always the chance that Kira isn’t involved and if they aren’t, then the worst thing we can do is chase down that idea to the exclusion of all others.” 

“I don’t know…” Naomi seemed to be considering it though, as her eyes roamed around the room. “Who else would take Raye? Who else would have a reason to do that? But I do understand what you’re saying. We shouldn’t ignore any options, no matter how unlikely they look. I’ll keep it in mind.” She returned her gaze to him, more determined than it had been before. 

Good. This was good. “As well…” Light steadied himself internally and pressed on. “This doesn’t seem like Kira to me.” 

“Doesn’t seem like Kira?” Naomi muttered, looking at him carefully. 

Light nodded. “Aside from the fact that the writer of the letter never signed the letter or claimed to be Kira in any way…Kira does things that are well thought out, they’re a careful planner. “From what I’ve heard, the letter doesn’t make any sense and the reasons for sending it aren’t clear. I get that maybe Kira is doing something unexpected and we might not know what that is yet, but it just seems too random.” He pondered, thinking aloud. “The kidnapping of your fiance, the letter, the demands in it, the complete lack of action after this…it all just feels random, like it has little thought and no meaning behind it all.” 

“That…” Naomi looked surprised. “Now that you mention it, I haven’t seen much of Kira’s overt actions up until now, but it does seem like it doesn’t fit. And what you said about there being no action after the letter…that doesn’t make sense, either. From what little I’ve seen, Kira is an active person, they act rather than react. Clearly, the perpetrator here is waiting for us to call off the investigation, but they’ve put themself in a situation where all they can do is wait. Kira is confident and assertive. But this person, whoever wrote the note…well, on closer reflection, they really lacked confidence.”

Light took this revelation in, thoughtfully. “I didn’t see the letter the way you did, so I can’t judge by how it was written unless I see it.”

“I’m sure if you saw it, you would be able to give a wonderful view of the investigation,” Naomi reassured him. 

Light smiled brightly at her effort. “Thank you. It would help if I could see it, but I don’t think I strictly need to. I trust what you observed about the person who wrote it, so that begs a question…if the writer lacked confidence or was unsure, then why did they do all this in the first place?”

Naomi was hit so hard by the question that she appeared to be in shock momentarily. “Why indeed..? Could they be someone inexperienced in this sort of crime? But that doesn’t make any sense, either. My fiance is no lightweight, he couldn’t be taken down so easily by some amateur.” 

Light realized he was getting somewhere. “Why the kidnapping? Why the letter? Kidnapping an FBI agent is a huge step, something that not a lot of people, even career criminals, feel prepared to take. Why did they do it and why do they seem unsure now?” 

“Could they be second-guessing their actions?” Naomi wondered. 

It was more peculiar the more he thought about it. Why take this step if they were in any way unsure where they were going with it? It was almost like they didn’t think it through… “If that’s the case,” Light continued with his thought. “Then maybe we can use that. 

Naomi’s head swiveled towards him. “How so?” 

Light leaned forward. “Do you think you can talk L into having routine interruptions on television regarding your fiance?” 

Naomi looked surprised and pensive. “He might want to keep it a secret that an FBI agent has gone missing, he might not go for it.” 

“They don’t necessarily have to say that he’s an FBI agent.” Light pressed. “Just show his photo and give his name. They can also say that he has a fiance that’s very worried about him and that the police are very invested in finding him as quickly as possible. That might be enough. If what we think about the person who abducted him is correct, then there are two likely options that’ll result from this: 1) The person feels worried and regretful and lets your fiance go. 2) They get nervous that the police are closing in on them, freaks out, and slips up.”

“Exploiting his apparent emotional state enough for him to make a mistake…it could work!” She exclaimed excitedly, some of the life coming back to her facial features as she considered it. 

Light found himself smiling in response to her own. “It could. I know L likes his secrets and dealing with things in-house, but if you can convince him to do even this small information reveal, we could pressure the criminal to do something. Or, almost as good, we could convince someone who might have seen something to come forward with information. I understand it’s pretty common for the police to do that, so…” Light purposely drew off, knowing that he had done his best. Now he had to see what she would do. 

“What you said makes a lot of sense, Light.” Naomi reflected. He could already see her mind whirling as she thought through the effects his idea could have if put into practice. “It might be the best chance we have at the moment. L has already had the letter sent in to be analyzed and fingerprinted. Expedited, of course. We don’t have anything of substance at the moment. That might change when I go to see him again tomorrow, but the way I see it, yours is the only lead we can follow right now. I’ll talk to L about it.” She promised him, seriously. 

“Thank you.” Light really was grateful. He wasn’t sure if he could get to see and convince L to do this without her, but now he had a chance. If this worked even a little bit, they could finally get some information to find out what was going on. He and Ryuk could do a lot with their abilities, but in this situation, they felt powerless. They couldn’t do anything besides asking questions, not until they got a viable answer. 

He just had to keep fishing until he hooked something.

Chapter Text

When Naomi next got picked up and taken to where L was staying this time, she had with her the confidence of someone on a mission, Light’s words ringing in her head. They had nothing right now, and L’s efforts to uncover where her fiance had gone had yielded nothing, but if she could convince L to release just a little bit of information to the public then maybe, just maybe, they could find him. 

She had been convinced, as they had all been, that it was the work of Kira, but talking with Light had given her clarity. He’d pointed out weird aspects of the case that didn’t align with it being Kira who’d done it. Sure, the blackmail letter regarding her fiance was delivered to where L was staying, and figuring out where he was at was no small feat, but it didn’t mean the person was Kira. On the contrary, Light had convinced her that it wasn’t. 

And if it wasn’t Kira…then her fiance might still be alive. She hadn’t had much hope that he was alive if it was Kira that had taken him, but an ordinary criminal might not be so hasty to kill him. He could still be alive!

At any rate, while L still changed hotels routinely, he had left someone permanently stationed at the hotel the blackmail letter had been delivered to just in case something else showed up at that location. As she arrived at L’s new hotel room, she arrived upon a familiar sight. 

The entire Japanese Police force that was still involved in the Kira case had taken up an almost permanent residence with L as they tried to solve the case of the missing FBI agent. She could tell they weren’t happy to find out that the FBI was in Japan to investigate them. It was nothing they’d said to her, of course, but something she figured from the attitudes that some of the individuals displayed towards L. It was one of sheer annoyance and insult, she’d seen it plenty of time in her line of work.

Or…her old line of work, anyway. Something else LIght had said crossed her mind at that thought, but she shook it off for the moment. She had a job to do, after all. 

“Welcome, Ms. Misora. Please take a seat.” L muttered at her arrival, his eyes never once moving from the computer he was on. He was the only one who didn’t look completely exhausted. The other investigators were going through papers or notes all around the room. 

Naomi grabbed a seat but dragged it closer to L before sitting down. It became the most advantageous point in the room for what she wanted. Naomi went over in her head how she wanted to bring this up to L. She would have to admit that she was passing information to someone outside of the investigation. She’d had more than enough experience with giving her superiors bad news. She’d also had to admit to dumb mistakes she’d made to men above her who were far more unreasonable than L. Compared to those moments in her career, she was sure that she would have an easier time with L…the other investigators, she wasn’t sure. 

Eventually, she snapped out of her deep thoughts only to see L staring straight at her. She didn’t know how long he had been doing that for, but she felt a twinge of nervousness at what he might have observed while she was unaware. Still, she shook herself and used this as her opportunity to start the conversation that they needed to have. 

“Have you made any more discoveries in the investigation into my fiance, Ryuzaki?” Naomi started, only barely remembering to use the code name that he had given her to use with him the last time she was there. 

“Not yet.” L admitted, neither blinking nor removing his gaze from her face. “I apologize for the slowness of our investigation.” He added, tonelessly. 

Naomi nodded. She’d expected that to be the case, given how things had been progressing so far. Still, she could hardly call it slow. It had only been a few days, after all. It felt slow-going to her because she was worried sick about Raye, but she was used to cases that took months. Perhaps L wasn’t, though. 

“I…have to admit something to you, Ryuzaki,” She continued. 

L tilted his head. “Oh? And what is that?” 

Naomi squared her shoulders. “I have been sharing information from this part of the investigation with a civilian.” 

She heard several papers being dropped behind her, as that statement had gotten the attention of the other investigators. “ What? ” She heard one of them say but she didn’t move her gaze from L’s. For his part, L only blinked once at the admission. 

“And who have you shared this information with?” L inquired, getting right to the point immediately. How so like himself. 

“Yes, please! You must tell us who you’ve spoken to at once!” That was definitely Chief Yagami. He sounded reasonably concerned with who might know such crucial information. Naomi felt a twinge of guilt but quickly suppressed it. No matter what, she couldn’t believe that seeking Light’s help in this was a mistake. She felt deep in her bones that he could help. Now, she just had to convince the others. 

“It was actually your son, Light.” She informed the room, allowing for no weakness to make it into her voice. 

“Light?!” Chief Yagami jumped up from his chair and looked at her in shock.

“Light…” L’s eyes lit up in curiosity and…excitement? He quickly followed up with another question. “Did he approach you about it?” 

“No, he didn’t.” Naomi was quick to straighten that out. “I approached him myself.” 

L hummed. “And why did you do that?”

That was the question she had been hoping for. “When I talked with him before, he struck me as an intelligent and insightful boy.” She started to explain herself. “Maybe it wasn’t my role in the investigation to pull unauthorized people into the investigation, but as his fiance, I wanted as many eyes on the case as I could get. I believe that he can help.” 

Chief Yagami looked like he didn’t know what to think about the situation and the other investigators around him had expressions that ranged from surprised to thoughtful, to upset or angry. She turned her attention back to L, whose expression she couldn’t hope to decipher. 

The moment of thoughtful silence lasted for a handful of seconds and no one seemed eager to break it while L thought. “I find Light intelligent, as well,” L spoke suddenly. Naomi’s experience kept her from jumping at the suddenness of it. “I have not had any personal interaction with him so far, but this does seem to be the case. Are you finding yourself trusting Light?” He inquired. 

This Naomi could answer with relative ease. “Yes.” She stated, decisively. “He’s given me every reason to trust him and no reasons to distrust him.” 

L seemed to take this in readily as if he’d been expecting that answer. “Indeed. That may well be the case.” Was his restrained answer. “Well, what has Light said about the subject?” 

This was going better than Naomi had thought it would, so far, and she found herself trying not to become wary over it. L was an unemotional and open-minded person, she reminded herself. It was only natural that he would want all of the information before he came to any sort of decision. She repeated what Light had observed to L and the others in the room. Occasionally, she was interrupted by questions from the other investigators for clarification, but on the whole, L remained silent and simply listened to her. 

That brought her around to what she really wanted to talk about. “Actually, Light had an idea that I think might bring a break in the investigation.” At this, everyone in the room beside the main two grew quiet. Even if not all of them were happy about Light being stuck up in the investigation without them knowing, they all wanted to hear what his idea was. 

After all, not a single person who had worked with or around Cheif Yagami had failed to hear tell of his son, Light. His son’s rumored brilliance and natural insight into investigations. Quite a few individuals had refused to believe the stories at first, finding it too difficult to imagine that someone so young could be so perfect, but their fellow officers were quick to inform them that Light had actually taken part in several unusually difficult cases and solved them. No one was allowed to doubt Light’s ability or the fact that he would make an amazing investigator, one day. 

“And? What is this idea of his?” L sounded nonchalant, but Naomi would swear that she saw him lean forward a little in his seat. 

Naomi spoke directly. “He thinks that you should put a story about it out into the media.”

“I’m not sure that that would work.” L leaned back in his seat - he had definitely leaned forward! - and picked up a spoon to stir a cup of tea he had. Naomi felt disappointed by his immediate dismissal, even if it had been expected. She stayed quiet for a few seconds, unsure if she should say anything else immediately, and L himself was silent for a time. Then, “What did he hope to gain from this?” 

“He…well, he believes that it will encourage someone with information to come forward and put pressure on the perpetrator,” Naomi stated. 

L hummed in mild interest. “He thinks Kira will react to pressure?” 

“He doesn’t think it’s Kira.” 

L stopped. Then quietly, “He doesn’t, huh?” He fell silent again. 

Naomi couldn’t stop herself from shifting uncomfortably in her chair, this time. There was something in that simple sentence that permeated the air. She couldn’t understand what, but there was an underlying tone, there. Naomi couldn’t bring herself to speak and the minute dragged on into two and then three.

Finally, “So Light wants us to put out a news story.” He seemed to almost be talking to himself at this point. Naomi seized on it, anyway. 

“Yes.” She nodded. “He said we could keep it vague, we wouldn’t even need to say that he’s an FBI agent. Just give his name and picture, say he’s missing, and some other small things to tug at heartstrings. Saying the police are looking hard for him might also be good for increasing the pressure.” 

L continued his thoughtful silence for a few more seconds, obviously thinking about something very hard, but then he made just one more inquiry. “You trust Light Yagami. You also agree with this idea, then?” 

It felt like a loaded question. She answered anyway. “Yes. I think it’s the best chance we have to find Raye soon. Before…” She couldn’t continue along that track. 

“Then…” L placed his cup down. "I'll agree to the idea that you and Light came up with, but under one condition." He said. 

"And what would that be?" Naomi leaned forward expectantly. What would he want for it? 

"I want your cooperation in setting up extensive, 24-hour surveillance on Light Yagami, effective immediately.” He informed, without any further preamble. 

The room exploded. 

“What!” Chief Yagami yelled, standing up again. Miscellaneous questions and complaints overlapped each other as each of the investigators let their own feelings be known. Naomi herself was comparatively quiet, staring at L with wide eyes. 

Surveillance on Light? Why does he want that? To protect him? “Why?” She found herself asking and then as if jerked back to herself by the sound of her own voice, she straightened her shoulders and stared back at him more evenly. 

“I’ve had an interest in the younger Yagami for a short time now. In truth, I suspect him of having something to do with Kira.” L replied as if his words were no big deal. 

“You suspect Light?” If it had been anyone else, Naomi would have instantly supported L because he was a great detective. But with Light, she just couldn’t see it. Light was sweet and thoughtful from the first moment they met and his concern over her fiance seemed genuine. She simply couldn’t think him capable of working with Kira, she couldn’t. 

He hummed. “I do suspect him.” L said, directly. “I think he may be the key to this whole investigation, even if I don’t have proof yet, which is why I want the surveillance. In exchange for the news story, I would ask that you and Chief Yagami agree to let me put surveillance in the Yagami household on Light’s behalf. He can’t know about it, of course, so you will have to make the agreement for him.” He directed that last statement at Naomi. 

“Hole on!” Chief Yagami approached them, glaring at L. “What has my son done that made you think he could have anything to do with Kira?” 

“His presence just seems suspicious, that’s all.” L answered vaguely, clearly keeping some things to himself. The Chief looked slack-jawed at L. 

“If,” Naomi started, sensing the opportunity. “If we agree to this on Light’s behalf, you’ll go through with our idea?” She checked. She needed to know before she accepted anything. The idea of making the decision for Light and then keeping it from him made her extremely uncomfortable. 

“Of course. That’s our agreement.” L agreed, readily. He began fielding complaints from Light’s father as Naomi allowed herself to get lost in her thoughts again. If she was going to keep the agreement with L and not let Light know, then she couldn’t ask his opinion for this. She had to decide for herself. 

Thinking to herself, she thought that Light would eventually agree if he’d been asked about it. Light seemed, to her, to be a strong boy who would be willing to submit himself to whatever was needed to get further in a case. I think if he was here, he would tell me to agree to it. Naomi decided. That seemed like something he would say. 

She took a deep breath. “I agree.” She said firmly, cutting off the two men who had continued talking while she was lost in thought. Chief Yagami looked frustrated, but both he and L turned to her as she spoke.

“With all due respect, Ms. Misora,” Chief Yagami started, looking surprised that she had so quickly agreed to L’s proposal. “But Light is my son. And this is about my family and our home. I don’t feel that you’re qualified to give your approval for something like this.” 

“I asked for her opinion, as well as yours.” L defended her. “She is working with Light, after all.” 

“That’s another thing! I don’t like my son being involved with the investigation. It’s dangerous! An FBI Agent has already been kidnapped. My son is only in high school!” The man was clearly working himself up. L remained apathetic, but Naomi felt a guilty pinch in her stomach at getting Light involved when he hadn’t been interested in the Kira Investigation, to begin with. But something occurred to her and she interrupted before he could go on any longer. 

“But ultimately, we should take into account what Light would want. Maybe I’m wrong, but I don’t think that he would be okay with the investigation continuing to stall for his sake.” She truly believed that to be the case. Light is made of sterner stuff than that, he wouldn’t like being treated like a child. “And if L is truly suspicious of Light, then his suspicions won’t go away unless he has some kind of proof that Light hasn’t done anything wrong.”

She gave Chief Yagami a strong look. “I believe Light is innocent. If you believe that too, then putting your home under surveillance will be enough to put an end to it. Putting him under surveillance would not just be what’s best for finding my fiance, but also what’s best for Light. We can prove he didn’t do anything wrong.” 

Chief Yagami stared at her in surprise before collecting himself and turning to L. “Ryuzaki, do you really need to add surveillance to my household for me to prove that my son hasn’t got anything to do with Kira?” He asked, his voice weary. 

“It would be the most expedient way, yes. Presumably, Kira wouldn’t be able to kill without some outward sign that he’s doing it. If we, say, put video cameras around the house and especially in Light’s room, then we would be able to verify in a relatively short time whether or not Light is truly innocent.” He answered without looking at either of them. 

Chief Yagami looked between her and L several times before he sighed heavily. “Alright, I’ll agree, as well. But if we’re going to do this, I don’t want to have to do it again so we’re doing it right the first time. I want all areas of my home covered so there are no blindspots. I don’t want anyone arguing that Light could have been doing something nefarious where the cameras couldn’t see him.” He turned his back on them and started walking back to his original seat. 

“I was going to do that anyway.” L replied to his back. To Naomi, he said, “Thank you for your cooperation. Watari will get the details sorted, right away.” 

“I did it for Light and my fiance.” Naomi wanted to make sure he knew that. “I don’t at all think you’re right about Light. I actually don’t know what you’re thinking, but if this was the only way to move forward in the investigation, then let’s do it.” 

She took a deep breath and spoke the words to herself, hardly being able to believe them. 

“Light’s going under surveillance.”

Chapter Text

After the weekend he'd just had, Light's school day felt unusually normal. Painfully ordinary, but that was how it always went. He couldn't stop thinking about the recent developments in the Kira Case, though, and he barely kept his usual high performance throughout the day. Barely, but he still managed to, even as he was so thoroughly distracted. After all, at least one lifetime of striving to be the best in all areas created something akin to an instinct. All the same, it was a relief when he got back home and could let the Perfect Student act down just a little bit.

Light called out that he was home, but there was no answer. Something pricked at the back of his mind as usually, his mother was home with some kind of greeting when he got back, even if she was busy with something. Maybe she went out for groceries and it's taking a while, Light thought. 

A brief memory flashed through Light's mind at the consideration. It was a scene from when he was much younger, just about to enter middle school. He'd grown a recent interest in helping his mom around the house at the time and the following events had confused him at that age. When he'd helped his mother once, she'd been very grateful and praised him highly for it. When he'd begun doing it several times, she simply accepted the help. When it had started being a habit of his, she'd thanked him but it had been lackluster and she'd tacked on an additional statement after some thought. She told him that even though she's grateful for the help, if he has the time to be doing those things, then his effort would be better spent on school. 

At the time, he was still a kid and he didn't understand the change in her behavior. Why a little help was great but more was undesirable. The statement, as soft a reprimand as it was, got under his skin though and he'd stopped helping her around the house after that. If she noticed, she never said a word about it to him. 

Light didn't completely understand even as a young adult, but his childish confusion had long ago been washed away by a more adult weariness. After all, he'd gotten tired, so very tired, long ago about being redirected to school or homework whenever one of his parents got it into their heads that he should be working harder. He didn't have the wherewithal to question the why's of it anymore. 

As Light headed up the stairs to the door, his boring day took an irreversible turn. It was right as he stopped in front of his door that he noticed the handle. While he hadn't put a piece of paper in his door or the pen on the door hinge, he'd still been doing that old trick of resetting the handle into a forced position every time he left his room. Aside from serving a purpose, it was also comforting for him in a way. A bit of a taste of what used to be. 

Pausing his hand in the air for only a fraction of a second before he continued its journey to grab the door handle, Light glanced discreetly behind him. Ryuk. Without saying a thing, he met Ryuk's eyes and gave him a look. 

"Oh! Got it!" Ryuk had a feeling he knew what that look was and as Light swung his bedroom door open with deliberate casualness, his Shinigami friend flew past him and beat him into the space.

Within seconds, he was milling about the room, invisible to anyone but the teenager and checking to make sure everything was okay for Light. 

He only had to check a few spots before he had something to report. "Hey, Light! There are a bunch of cameras in your room! They look the same as the last time this happened." 

Light didn't reply, but then Ryuk wasn't expecting him to, this time. They'd both done this whole song and dance before. Rather, Ryuk was feeling happy for his friend. Light had been hoping for just this development so though they hadn't been expecting it right now, he was glad to see those cameras. 

Upon hearing Ryuk's proclamation, Light was forced to quickly raise a hand to cover his mouth and pretend to yawn in order to cover the smile that quickly swept across his face without his consent. Light really was happy to hear that! In all the chaos of Naomi's fiance going missing, he'd forgotten about this. 

Of course! Light thought, obliged to keep his hand to his face as his smile just wouldn't leave. Of course, L would use this opportunity to put me under surveillance. Last time, L had me as a suspect only because Raye was following me and then died. Now, I've not only been connected to an agent that's been kidnapped, but also that agent's fiance who I escorted right to L. Of course, he'd be interested in watching my movements and see me as the answer to Raye's kidnapping. 

Light nearly shook his head at himself for not thinking of that but didn't, knowing that now more than ever, he needed to maintain his outward appearance. 

I haven't planned anything, Light thought as he sat at his desk. Even though he'd thought about this eventuality and written ahead in his Note for just such an occasion, he didn't have a set plan waiting in the wings for what he'd do while under surveillance. Well, he'd had a few daydreams about it that wouldn't be bad to bring into reality. And he was great at improvising so he'd have to see what he could come up with. No way could he let such an opportunity pass!

He'd have to keep in mind that his father was watching. Then again, that might make it better in some ways; put L in a more awkward position in the investigation. Light forced his oncoming smirk to turn into a benign smile as he rooted through his bag and pulled out a few items, almost everything besides the Death Note. He wouldn't be needing that for a while. 

Light's other hand went to turn on the small TV he had in his room. A relatively small idea popped into his mind at that moment. He could make a little bit of a reputation for himself among the Kira investigators - that of someone who never really watches the news. Up until this point, he'd only ever watched the news in his bedroom anyway so all he had to do for this to become an established fact was not turn on any news channels himself and pay little attention to them when someone else did while he was under surveillance. 

It was a pretty small thing, all things considered, but a small thorn in a person's side still caused pain. It would be quite the irksome fact of his behavior for L that would make it difficult to pin Kira’s crimes on him, wouldn't it? A small taste of what was to come…

Thankfully, Light could get started on the right foot. Being the overly cautious person that he knew he was, Light always changed the channel he was on to something more benign before turning it off. So when he turned his TV set on, it immediately alighted onto a romantic drama that had been popular lately. Light, deciding that he needed some hobbies and personal interests outside of crime this time around, tried to get into different TV shows. 

Most he found boring, but he was able to stir in himself some mild interest in romantic dramas when he started imagining himself and L in the romantic lead positions. Those particular imaginings moved him to laughter more than a few times when the leads did something that would be ridiculous for L or himself to do and imagining them doing those things was incredibly funny. The more he watched, the more he began to appreciate the shows for what they were. 

As Light started to back in his chair to watch the show even though it was already halfway done, he jerked back up in his seat. His thoughts had just turned towards another little game he could play! Life was all about reputation, he knew this well. After all, it was his reputation that he'd built and was continuing to build that would make it difficult for L to convince people that Light could be a killer. Heck, it was his and his father’s reputations in his past life that provided him so much protection. So if he was playing that kind of game with L…

Light stood up from his chair and maneuvered his TV to be more pointed towards his bed. Then he paced back to his bed and went to sit down on it. Seeing this, Ryuk scooched to the side to give him more room. Light flashed a discrete smile at him and sat cross-legged on the bed, grabbing a pillow along the way. Then he held the pillow to his chest in the most cliched way he could think of and settled back to watch as many episodes as he could before dinner. He was going to binge!

~ 🅚 ~

L had been perplexed by the newest development in the Kira case. To be sure, Agent Penber being kidnapped and then finding out that his fiance, who also happened to be present in Japan, was someone he had personally worked with on a special case was indeed entirely unexpected. However, what L found most fascinating was how Light Yagami had, once again, become stuck up in the investigation into said FBI Agent's disappearance without his knowledge.

Why is it always that you find your way back into the center of things, Light? L wondered, deeply wishing that he would have the opportunity to ask the boy that question himself. 

L was disappointed to hear that Light hadn’t been the one to seek out information on the investigation into Raye Penbar’s disappearance, but that was the only disappointment he experienced. His mind was already spinning with possibilities . Naomi may have been the one to ask Light to join in looking for her fiance, but if Light was Kira, then he would have been clever enough to be thinking that many steps ahead when he met her at the police station. 

If it was true that someone at the station really was an informant for Kira, it was a possibility that they could have informed Kira that Naomi was there and was asking about the investigation. Depending on how much Kira knew about the FBI agents, he may have known who she was when he met her or found out later. Every effort of Light’s at that time could have been to earn her trust, knowing that he would eventually kidnap her fiance and she would look to him for help. 

These were all only theories, of course. There was no objective proof for them and even L could admit that it sounded far-fetched. To be able to assume her behavior so accurately would either take a great deal of luck or a great deal of experience and Light may not even have anything to do with Kira. Light Yagami could very well be an innocent, ordinary teenager and L reminded himself that that was the most likely result. And yet…every time he closed his eyes and thought about what Kira might look like, he kept envisioning them to look something like Light. He was fixated on the boy for reasons that were hard to explain in any way other than intuition. 

L was at that moment watching the video camera footage of the Yagami household, waiting for Light to come home and start his activities. Chief Yagami had insisted they be alone to watch his family, so the other investigators either went home or to a different room after the cameras had been placed. 

The Chief might not have been home often, which he self-consciously admitted to, but he knew his family’s schedules remarkably well. He’d known that his wife would be home, his children at school until their respective end times. A quick call from him to his wife asking her to deliver something he’d forgotten to the station got the home completely empty for the cameras to be placed. 

As he waited on the edge of his seat for Light to come home, L couldn’t help but think back to what Naomi said about Light’s suspicions about the culprit of this little fiasco. Or giant disaster, depending. L thought. He’d asked the U.S. for a favor, after all, in sending a few of their agents over. Having one of those agents go missing would not go over well. Initially, he’d been able to keep Penber’s disappearance a closely-held secret, but it wouldn’t be long before they began to wonder where he was and why he wasn’t reporting in. 

The realization that one of their agents had been compromised would be hastened by the agreement he’d made with Naomi (and Light). The FBI response to seeing the news story L was prepared to release at any moment about Penber would be immediate. Hopefully, Watari would be able to handle that call when it came through. He didn’t want to be distracted by his surveillance for even a moment, especially at the time that the story was being released across the media. 

Still, Light’s words, as told through Naomi, gave him a tantalizing tidbit to think about. What Light apparently said was not entirely surprising, he supposed. Many people accused of a crime wouldn’t admit to doing it and they often denied heavily even when exposed to ironclad evidence. Yet, even if it wasn’t entirely out of the realm of normalcy, L found himself mildly surprised by the move, anyway. 

Why try to convince them that it isn’t Kira? If Light wasn’t Kira, then wouldn’t he want it to be Kira so that they could be led to the killer sooner? And if Light was Kira, then shouldn’t he be proud of what he’d done? L wasn’t exactly expecting Light to brag about how he was guilty, but he’d taken Kira to be the type who wanted people to know that they were there. If Kira had done something, he would have thought that Kira would want them to think he’d done it. 

Then again, L chewed on the thought. Perhaps he’s trying to misdirect us. If Light is Kira or working with them, then Light may be aware that we could use this incident to track him down. Kira is not quite as arrogant as I had initially thought they were. If Light were Kira, he may indeed want to convince us this isn’t the work of Kira to gain some wiggle room for himself. And do…what with it? L pondered. Of course, he would need more data for that answer. 

If Light wasn’t Kira, then his observations about the letter’s composition hold more weight. As soon as his conversation with Noami had finished, he’d looked at the letter once more in that new light. There was indeed a slight hesitation in the writing that L would admit was not very Kira-like. Kira was a much more fearless person who believed themself to be above humanity, in general. 

Light had been correct, it would seem. Whether he was correct because he was a truly perceptive boy or because he had deliberately written the letter to seem unlike himself, remained to be seen. Regardless, L found himself extremely unwilling to consider that Kira could not be behind this kidnapping. The possibility that some other unknown person was the cause instead of Kira was difficult to stomach, given the fact that the agent who was kidnapped was in Japan to take a small part in the Kira Case. Who else here would have the motivation to pull such a stunt?

Briefly, L wondered a little about Kira's motivation to kidnap the agent. Did Penber perhaps see something he shouldn't have? 

L was distracted from the thought by Light returning home. He heard more than saw Chief Yagami sit up in his seat and L himself focused more intensely on the cameras. 

The first minute or so was relatively normal. After calling out his arrival and noting the lack of other people in the home, he proceeded up to his bedroom. There was a strange pause just before he entered his bedroom that gave L a moment of intrigue - did Light somehow know that his room had been tampered with? How? - before Light immediately entered into the room without hesitation and the thoughts were dismissed. 

Light didn't appear to notice anything off about the space and proceeded to start relaxing, a perfectly normal thing to be doing after a day of school. Still, it hadn’t been quite what he was expecting, insofar as he’d had expectations. With how the older Yagami talked about his son and the boy’s school performance, he’d expected the boy to be more studious. Then again, there was no reason why he couldn’t study later. 

“Do you know much about your son’s schedule?” L inquired, not taking his eyes off the screen. 

“Not really,” Soichiro admitted, looking deeply uncomfortable as he said it. “I haven’t spent much time around my family for some time now and the Kira Case has only made it worse. My job takes up so much of my time and I work so hard most of the time…many nights I don’t leave the office at all and when I do go home, all I can do is sleep.” There was a deep weariness in his voice. He sounded bone tired. 

L turned to stare at him for several long moments before going back to the camera feed. “I understand.” And he did. He knew quite a bit about work consuming your life, leaving little left for anything else. Although in L’s case, he hadn’t had much of an outside life for his work to consume. He hadn't had many friends and no family except for Watari. 

Onscreen, Light suddenly jolts into movement like he's realized something and pops out of his chair. At first, L had leaned forward in his seat, eager to see what the suspect was about to do, but he huffed in disappointment when all Light did was turn on his TV set. He’s just watching TV? L thought in disappointment. 

But he blinked in surprise when he saw what Light was watching. Slowly and without looking away from Light, L grabbed his cell phone off of a side table and quickly pulled up Watari’s number. “Yes, L?” Watari’s voice came over the line. 

“Watari, could you please look up information for me on a TV series called Boys Over Flowers?” He couldn’t afford to take even a fraction of his attention off of the cameras to do it himself. 

“Of course. One moment.” Watari predictably responded. L stared at Light who, in turn, stared at his own screen as he listened to Watari typing over the phone. Then the man came back over the line, “It appears to be a recently aired romantic drama, centering around a high school girl and a small group of rich young boys. It’s very popular, it seems.” 

L blinked in surprise at the information, taking a fresh look at what he could see of the TV show. The way Light had moved it to face the bed had given them a better view. Now that Watari mentioned it, he could see how it could be a teen drama. 

“Thank you, Watari.” L said, mulling this over. “Please do some more intensive research into this series, just in case there’s some hidden meaning to it that Kira wants us to see.” Watari agreed and hung up. 

After placing his phone back on the table, L chanced a quick glance at the elder Yagami who had been suspiciously quiet. He was not entirely surprised to see the man staring disbelievingly at the screen. He could partially understand why. The Chief seemed like a man who subscribed to more traditional male/female roles and Light’s behavior at that moment wasn’t exactly masculine. 

“Did you know your son liked to watch these kinds of shows?” L decided to prod. 

“No…not at all,” Soichiro said quietly, still not looking away from his son. 

L hummed. “I wonder…how much do you know about your son, exactly?” 

At this, Soichiro jerked and whirled around to look at L. L, non-plussed, just calmly stared at the screen. “My son is not a killer and I will not believe otherwise!” He defended, heatedly. 

“Hum…but you did say you’re rarely home, didn’t you? And you didn’t know about his viewing preferences.” L noted. He was honestly surprised himself. He knew, of course, that everyone had those secret habits or interests that they kept from everyone, even the people closest to them who thought they knew everything. Still…he hadn’t taken Light Yagami for the type. 

“It’s a small thing.” Soichiro ground out. “I don’t need to know his interests to know what kind of person my son is!”

L let the words hang in the air for a few long seconds, then, “Is it?”

Soichiro looked puzzled at that. “What?”

L stared harder at the boy onscreen who was doing a good job of appearing to be absolutely harmless. “Is it really such a small matter?” 

~ 🅚 ~

Light was eventually called away from his binging by his mom's call of dinner. Although he was annoyed to leave his current episode right in the middle, he was decently happy for the break. Somewhere during the marathon watching, Ryuk remembered that he wouldn't be able to eat apples in the house with the cameras there again and had been loudly lamenting that fact ever since. Light slid out of bed and headed downstairs. 

He’d been thinking about things he could do to have a little fun while the cameras were in his house. A good amount of things to clear himself to everyone besides L came to mind, but he was having trouble thinking of things to do just to screw around. Light proceeded to eat his dinner with his mother and sister, complimenting his mom on her cooking as he always did. Honestly, it was pretty obligatory and he just said it habitually at this point. 

He half-listened as his sister chatted animatedly about whatever happened at school and their mother engaged her. He’d perfected his ability to completely zone out while looking interested early in his first life. He was briefly jerked out of his thoughts of L when his mom asked him something about how school was going. He answered and, as usual, she turned away after that. The news was playing on the living room TV and Light did his best to not even glance at the thing. He wanted to look completely disinterested. But then something happened. 

“Hold on! We just received some important information!” The news reporter suddenly declared loudly, drawing the attention of his mother and sister. Light reluctantly took this as his excuse to look at the TV, as well. “We’ve got word of a high-profile missing person’s case! We don’t have a great deal of information yet, but he’s a visiting member of the American government. This man has been named as Raye Penbar. He went missing early morning on-”

Light sat up straight in his chair as an image of Raye Penbar popped up onscreen next to the reporter. Yes, yes, yes! Light chanted in his head and a grin spread across his face. 

Ryuk took this moment to fly to his side and share in LIght’s excitement. “This is what you wanted, right? Looks like things are working out.” He didn’t expect a reply until later, knowing Light couldn’t talk right then. 

“His fiance is worried about him and misses him very much. If you have seen this man or have any information on his disappearance, please contact Chief of Police, Soichiro Yagami.”

“Dad?” Sayu said, surprise shining through her voice. “Is this what dad’s working on, right now?” 

Naomi did it! She got L to agree! I knew she could, she’s very tenacious. Hopefully, we can spook something out of the culprit soon or even strike gold with a witness! Light thought, excitedly. I’m almost completely sure that the perpetrator will react! By the way the letter was written and the fact that no further contact has been attempted, I’m sure this person is unsure and hesitant. This will definitely scare them into being stupid. The fact that this was a tactic that L had used on him in the past wasn’t lost on Light. He knew its effectiveness firsthand. 

Even though Light continued to think about it, the news report shut off quickly after that and it passed out of the conversation. Sayu was the first to finish dinner and immediately hopped up to change the television channel, exclaiming that a new episode of her favorite series was about to start. Before, Light would have mocked that kind of show, but that would make him a hypocrite now though. Light glanced at the actor on screen, briefly recognizing him as the same Hideki Ryuga that L had taken the identity of in their past lives, and wondered if L would do the same this time, before finishing his own dinner and standing up. Wait. 

Light stopped and looked back at the man on TV. The reminder of L, mixed with the romantic setting of the episode gave him an idea of something that would really mess with L. How to bring it up, how to bring it up…

“What are you watching, Sayu?” He tried to ask casually. 

Sayu looked over at him in surprise from her position on the living room floor before she lit up. "Oh, it's this new drama I started watching! Hideki Ryuga stars in it! He's just the dreamiest!" 

Light allowed his gaze to settle on Ryuga, respectively. "I've seen better." He commented, at last. 

"Huh?" His sister blinked at him, clearly not expecting that response, and Light could see why. In his past life, he probably would've just given a disinterested "whatever" and left. "Well, it's not fair to compare Hideki to the girls at your school." She pointed out in visible confusion.

Here, Light shifted uncomfortably and not all of it was fake. He hadn't thought much about introducing his sexuality to his parents. Honestly, he hadn't thought it important at all; he was going to go after L regardless of anything else. He was being a little spontaneous with this one, but…

"I wasn't talking about the girls." Light waved his hand dismissively. "There are a lot of attractive guys around, you know. I think I find personalities way more attractive than looks, anyway."

Light pretended to look disinterested but he was cataloging the changes to the expression on Sayu's face. It seems she caught the implications of his words; her expression cycled through confused to surprised to recognition.

Please ask, please ask. Light chanted in his mind. Sayu was a curious little girl, so…

"Do you check out guys a lot, Light?" Her wide eyes peered at him, waiting. It wasn't said in her usual teasing manner but instead in genuine curiosity and Light found himself forcing down a smile at that.

“Time to exercise your acting chops!” Ryuk chuckled in the background. 

“Wh-what? Don’t be ridiculous!” Light huffed and turned away, clearly flustered. 

“You do!” She wasn’t smiling but she wasn’t frowning, either. She looked surprised, so surprised. She was looking at him as if she were seeing him for the first time. 

Light wasn’t surprised. This probably flew in the face of every expectation she had for him, everything she thought she knew about her older brother. He wasn’t the same person he was in his past life, the person who was so invested in feeding into people’s expectations of him that he resorted to leading a double life until he finally snapped. 

“Be quiet.” Light snapped for show, glancing around the room but he knew that their mother had stepped out of the room for a moment. He didn’t mind so much if his mother knew, but he suspected it would inconvenience him more if his sister knew. Humans could get so caught up in things like sexual orientation. 

Sayu’s mouth snapped shut for just a moment as she too looked for their mother. Then, as if she couldn’t help herself, she asked, “Is there someone you like? Someone you think looks better than Hideki Ryuga?”

“I…” Light made sure to look uncomfortable as if he didn’t know if she should answer her question, even if he had one. 

“Playing around, aren’t ya, Light?” Ryuk chuckled, floating on his back. 

“Come on, Light! Pleeeease?” Sayu leaned forward, looking at him pleadingly. 

“Well…” Light started, purposely looking reluctant. “I haven’t actually seen what he looks like, but…” 

“Haven’t seen what he looks like?” Sayu repeated, blinking in surprise. 

Light was ready. “You know how dad told us about L, the Great Detective?” 

Sayu nodded, still unsure where this was going. “Yeah, I think I remember. He told us about the secretive detective a few years ago and mentioned him once or twice since then, but not much else. Why are you bringing that up?”Light blushed heavily at the question, his reaction so obvious that his sister immediately started talking again before Light had the chance to respond. “It’s him?! You like HIM?” She burst out. 

“I looked him up a little on my own.” Light added, defensively. “And maybe did a little hacking.” He muttered. “He is secretive, I’ll give him that, but he’s very impressive. They say he hasn’t failed to solve a case yet.” As Light allowed himself to gush a little, a sappy smile worked its way onto his face. 

Sayu’s mouth nearly dropped open as she stared at him wide-eyed. “You really have a crush on him, don’t you? That nameless detective!” 

“Whatever. I’m leaving.” Light huffed, looking embarrassed. He turned away back towards the stairs to the upper floor.  

“Aw, don’t be like that!” Sayu called back at him but was stopped from saying more by their mom reentering the room. 

"Sayu! Come and help me with the dishes." Their mom called, making her way to the sink. 

"Aw, mom! My show's still on! Why can't Light help?" Sayu complained, getting distracted easily from their previous conversation. 

"Your brother has studying to be doing. Come and help." She lightly reprimanded her daughter, waiting until the girl huffed and got up from her spot in front of the TV before turning back to the sink.

~ 🅚 ~

Light pretended to storm back to his room and flopped back on his bed. He frowned and huffed, but on the inside, he was smirking. That was fun. 

Ryuk floated around him, chuckling softly. “Did you really need to declare your feelings point-blank to L and your dad?” 

“Mm.” Light made a non-committal sound. 

The Shinigami figured he knew what that meant. “I would’ve thought you’d want to do that in person when you met him, but I guess you just couldn’t help yourself, could you? Just had to make things difficult for L, don’t you?”

“Hm?” Light questioned under his breath without moving his lips, managing to sound somewhat smug, even then. 

“Don’t think I didn’t notice.” Ryuk quipped. “You didn’t just possibly fluster him by declaring your affection for him on camera, but you did it knowing full well that your dad must be with him right now. There’s no way that won’t be awkward for the two of them. I think you managed to hit two birds with one stone, getting both L and your dad with this one.” He cackled crazily, taking a spot on the bed as Light closed his eyes to soak in the praise. 

Well, it was a good first night. Light acknowledged happily, covering his face with his arm so he could let out a smirk. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light was once again visiting his dad’s office at the police station when it happened. He was waiting at the reception desk for them to get a call through to his dad. He honestly wasn’t surprised that his dad wasn’t easy to get ahold of these days, Light remembered him spending all of his time with L during the whole surveillance episode. It had been very quiet at the station lately so he didn’t mind waiting. 

Just as the officer behind the desk got a call from his father, Light heard the door swing open. Hm? Someone’s here? Light thought with some surprise. He hadn’t seen another person so much as walk through the room since he got there about fifteen minutes ago. Unconsciously, Light turned towards the door to see if it was someone he knew. 

Light blinked in confusion when he saw them and two words slipped through his lips, “A teenager?”

Chapter Text

L and Soichiro continued to watch as he watched episode after episode of Boys Over Flowers. L couldn’t help becoming slightly intrigued by this behavior as it drew closer and closer to dinner time and Light had barely done a thing but stare at the TV.  "Your son has been home for several hours now and hasn't done any additional study or schoolwork. Is this normal for him?" L inquired. 

The detective had been prepared for anything in his observations, of course. The whole point of said observation was to get a base idea of who Light Yagami was, after all. Before setting up the cameras, all he knew  about Light was his class records and what other people had told him. However, the average individual is appallingly unobservant and mindless. Their comments will undoubtedly be lacking in insight and many will just be wrong. 

Especially if Light was as good at acting as L assumed him to be. He could take very little that was commonly said about Light as truth, only use it to corroborate what he himself observed. Naomi Misora was the person he trusted most to pick up on details about Light that other people missed but even still, Light Yagami was someone he needed to see for himself. 

“I…can’t say,” Soichiro replied to L’s question, surprise still evident in his voice and his eyes pasted on the screen. “Light does stay in his room most of the time and I try not to bother him, so I don’t know exactly what he does in there…I always assumed he just studied. I didn’t…” Soichiro stopped himself here and cleared his throat. “I’m barely ever home these days, he could have gained some interests since I’ve last been reliably at home.” 

Could one of those new interests be murder? L pondered with some good humor. He detected a bit of guilt and a smidge of worry in the Chief’s demeanor. The man struck L as one of those individuals who wanted things to be a certain way and felt uneasy when they were not so. Given how Soichiro followed L dutifully even when the other investigators chafed at his orders, L did not think the elder Yagami was someone who needed to always be in control, per se, but he perhaps had an idea of the way things should be and felt it keenly. 

L didn’t press for anything else and turned his attention back to the cameras. He’d been unable to think of any shrouded messages or hidden meaning to the shows Light was watching. Could it be that the boy was simply watching a TV show that he liked? Despite the fact that this particular show was more popular with preteen girls then boys about to graduate high school (and the police chief’s son, on top of that), it wasn’t anything truly strange for a normal person. However, was Light a normal person? Was it really as innocent as all that? He didn’t come to any answers by the time Light got up to have dinner. 

Light had failed to turn on the news or go on his computer at any point and L couldn't tell if Light was making a point of not looking or if this was normal for him. Frustratingly, if not unsurprisingly, Soichiro Yagami was of little help in establishing a baseline for how each of the family members tended to act. 

Not for the first time, L wished that Kira had a more fast-paced style of killing because as it was, there would likely be no kills for a while and that would make it hard to tell if the surveillance of the Yagami household was having any effect on Kira's rate of killing. Kira usually went weeks, sometimes even months, without committing a single kill. At least, a kill that they could trace back to them, since Kira's special abilities muddied the waters somewhat. 

L calmly watched the family eat their dinner and talk, bored out of his mind. It was all incredibly domestic and common. Nothing even slightly interesting. He caught Soichiro looking longingly at the picture the small family made but decided to be kind and not comment on it. He was more interested in seeing Light’s reaction to the news report, anyway. How would Light react to his concession? 

After he’d ascertained that he wouldn’t get any useful information out of the family’s ramblings, he told Watari to pull the trigger on the news story. The reporter was successful in getting the family’s attention with the limited amount of information he’d been willing to disclose, but L’s attention was firmly on one member, in particular. 

What L wasn’t prepared for was the unmitigated joy that overtook the young man’s face as he realized what was happening. L was completely dumbfounded at the pure excitement that was nearly radiating through the screen. He’d gone through several possibilities in his head, but he hadn’t expected this sort of reaction. Feigned disinterest or smug satisfaction seemed the most likely candidates.

Instead, the boy seemed almost like an overgrown puppy when he looked like that, rather than the restrained and studious student that all the photos of him seemed to portray. He had a wide smile on his face as he watched the news announcement that somehow managed to look both excited and fond, of what, he couldn’t be sure. L thought that that smile really brought out the softness of the boy’s face.

Was it possible this was an act? Could he truly be that excellent an actor?

The night soon began to wind down and the family finished up their dinner one by one. The television channel was eventually changed to something else and it looked like nothing was going to happen until the family broke up for the evening, but the detective tuned back in when Light took an interest in whatever show his sister was watching. Some kind of romantic drama with a popular actor as the male lead. L did start to pay more attention at this point even as it mostly came across as Light connecting with his sister over a common interest and he didn’t think that it would prove to be anything useful. 

Light Yagami is infatuated with someone? L heard but easily breezed past the partial admission that Light was partial to the male gender, merely adding it to his mental files on the boy as he waited to see if Light would name the individual. Someone who went to his college, perhaps? L wasn’t sure if the information would prove useful in the investigation but if they came to a point where they might have to use this individual to lure Kira into a trap–

That was until Light said…

“What?!” Soichiro Yagami yelled at the top of his lungs, jumping up from his seat and slamming both his hands on the table in front of him. L didn’t flinch at the outburst. Normally, this would have been because of his lack of strong external reactions or from years of being desensitized to violent outbursts in his line of work, but this time, it was because he couldn’t move. His entire body felt frozen. His eyes widening into saucers. 

What did Light Yagami just say…? Light said something else and headed back upstairs, but what was said went right over L’s head. For once, he wasn’t paying attention to what he was seeing. Being frozen was the only reason he was even still watching the screen to know that Light had left. He felt more numb than usual. 

Did Light Yagami really just admit to having a crush on L himself? What were the chances of it and how was it even possible; Light himself admitted to the fact that he’d never met L in person and had little than snippets of information from his father and L’s reputation to go on. Was this just a teenagers shallow interest in something mysterious mixed with a boy’s libido? But still, what on Earth possessed him to think that L should be his target of affection. And what did it say that L’s main suspect for Kira has now admitted to having a crush on the Detective L? 

L’s mind was whirling like a tornado, ideas getting tossed in, around, and then discarded as he quickly tried to make sense of what the surveillance situation had spiraled into. 

Did this mean that he was wrong and Light wasn’t Kira? Would Kira really become a serial killer if he had a crush on a detective? If true, that didn’t make any sense. Most would try to impress their crushes not lay waste to the criminal population…then again, in Kira’s twisted mind, maybe that course of action made sense. Maybe they thought that, since L was a man of the law, they would be helping him by killing off criminals. Could that be it? Could Kira’s rampage really come down to Kira being a teenager intent on impressing their object of affection who happened to work with law enforcement? Then again, that was assuming Light’s statement was truthful, which it may not have been. 

More than anything, L was struck by the timeliness of this admission. For Light to have a crush on L after the Kira investigation in which L is heavily involved already started and to admit to such in his own home during the time period shortly after the cameras were introduced to his home was…suspicious, to say the least. If accidental, it was indeed unlucky that Light would admit to such a thing when he did. However, if it was by design…

“What is Light saying!” Soichiro continued to bark. It was a rather useless thing to be doing, but it did urge L to pull himself back from his stupefaction. 

“Yes, what is Light saying?” L muttered under his breath. His words caused Soichiro to whirl on him. 

“What’s going on? Why is my son saying these things?” Soichiro was still yelling, irrationally angry over what they had both heard. 

Before L could respond, his cell phone on the desk rang and L swiped his hand out to pick it up. He knew what this was about. He held up a finger to the officer, silently telling him to wait, and took the call. “L?” Watari’s voice came through clearly. “I hear yelling coming from your room, do you need me to step in?” L knew from experience that the man was waiting for the slightest sign that L needed him and could burst into the room within two seconds. 

“That won’t be necessary, Watari.” L answered promptly, casting a glance at Soichiro. “We’ve merely just received some alarming information and Mr. Yagami is taking it poorly. I don’t believe he will resort to violence, so your presence is not needed.” 

“If you say so, then I will continue waiting on standby.” Watari’s response was short and simple.

“Thank you, Watari.” L hung up and turned his full attention back to Light’s father. The man’s anger had cooled upon hearing L’s short conversation with Watari. It’s likely brought to his attention how hostile he was behaving. It probably only elicited so much emotion from the man because the person at the center of it was his son. 

“Have you calmed down now, Mr. Yagami?” L inquired, putting the phone down. 

“Yes…yes. I apologize for my behavior, Ryuzaki. I don’t know what came over me.” Soichiro admitted, still sounding upset but at least he was more under control now. 

“Perfectly understandable.” L replied, honestly. He dismissed the man as the officer sat back down in his seat, nearly falling into it. 

“Why did my son say he…felt that way about you?” Soichiro choked out, now staring at the cameras despondently. L himself turned to the cameras, looking for answers. 

L thought that such a thing should be obvious to the average individual. If taken at face value, Light was admitting both to having a schoolboy crush on the detective next to him and being at least partially attracted to men, in general. He didn’t, however, think that saying such to the Japanese Chief of Police would make things better with the man at the moment. The implications, L was sure, was not lost on him, even if the man didn’t seem ready to face them head-on quite at this moment. 

“There is every possibility he was lying, if he figured out that there were cameras in the house.” L offered and although it was primarily meant to ease the man, it wasn’t even a meaningless platitude but rather a continuation of his previous thoughts before he was interrupted. It was well within the realm of possibility that Light may have discovered the cameras and so decided to make a shocking statement in order to see if he could get a reaction. But if true, what would he hope to gain? L wondered to himself. 

“How would he have found out about the cameras? We’ve been watching him the whole time, besides eating dinner he’s been doing nothing but watching TV. And that particular lie is…” 

That was also true. The question of how Light found out would have to be answered if he chose to believe it to be a lie. How would Light have found out about the cameras? L had actually expected Light to find at least a few of the cameras, which was an additional reason for him to add as many cameras as he did. The fact that Light hadn’t found any and hadn’t generally moved from his bed at all was an absolute surprise. 

If Light was truly Kira and had managed to know there were hidden cameras throughout his room and some around the house without exploring any spaces, then the killer would be by far more powerful than anyone – including L – had imagined and L couldn’t resign himself to such an idea. No matter how he looked at the situation, he just didn’t understand it. 

“You talk to your family about me?” L asked, recalling how Light had mentioned that fact, substantiated by Sayu Yagami. He hadn’t been aware that he’d been mentioned in the Yagami household, at all. He turned to look at the Chief in curiosity. 

“Not since the Kira Case started.” Soichiro defended, proactively. He was still looking at L warily, as if the detective had stolen his son or something. L internally sighed, resigned to the dawning realization that the man may not relax around him for some time, his protectiveness over his son that he’d already shown only going to get worse. 

This night’s worth of surveillance alone was truly testing Soichiro Yagami’s core beliefs about his son. Small behaviors, L knew, were indicative of larger disparities yet to be seen. The father had probably expected his son to go home and study all evening, bond with his family, and go to sleep early. Given Light’s grades and the tests he would be facing before graduation, it was not a particularly unreasonable expectation. L himself was surprised by what he had learned this night, but it only served to prove to him that he was on the right track in suspecting Light. He gave off all the appearances of being a normal, studious young man and none of that had showed on the footage. 

The Light they’d seen was different and yet it was only a snapshot.

“Regardless of when you did so, your children clearly remembered.” L pointed out, harmlessly. “I doubt I need to say this, but please be sure not to mention me to your family again. Until then, we must be careful as we approach this newest…finding.” L found himself unwillingly floundering on the last word. His own thoughts on the issue also needed to be worked through before the night was over. 

L didn’t know what to make of the situation and the possibilities that either Kira was even more powerful than L could have possibly expected or that Light didn’t know about the surveillance and was telling the truth about his crush. L had been in many strange and dangerous situations in his life, but he had never been anyone’s object of affection before. 

L didn’t flatter himself in thinking that Light’s supposed affection would persist if he met the “Great “L, but it was still a staggering blow to his mental state. He needed to clear his mind on the subject and investigate it or he would be stuck with the disconcerted feeling he felt rising in his gut until he left Japan. 

He caught the chief giving him the side-eye. 

L let out a frustrated groan underneath his breath. This was going to be a very long night…

~ 🅚 ~

Light tried not to stare at the teenager as they entered the police station. He quickly forced himself to look back towards the guy behind the front desk and watched the teen from the corner of his eye. Ryuk’s occasional observation was also helpful. 

Light was aware that he himself was a teenage human at the moment, but he was older, nearly ready to enter college. This teenager was younger, just a few years older than Sayu, by the looks of it. He was visibly nervous, fidgeting with his hands and glancing uncertainly around the lobby without his gaze lingering on anything in particular. The name hovering above his head was Hinata Sato. He looked like he would bolt from the police station at any moment, but something was keeping him from doing it. 

I wonder what exactly he’s doing here? Light thought, continuing to watch the boy twitch. Young people were frankly very uncommon in the precinct. It was all older men for the most part and to his knowledge, Light was the only person his age that came in regularly. Must have something to do with a case, maybe that's why he's so nervous. Light had already dropped off his father's change of clothes – as if he didn't know his dad was at yet another hotel with L – but he lingered around the front desk and chatted with the man behind it to see what happened. 

Hinata apparently made up his mind and squared his shoulders, marching away from the door and walking to where Light was. He didn't pay Light any attention though, instead focusing on the officer behind the desk. 

"Um…Sir?" He spoke hesitantly. 

The officer, who had glanced at the teen when he'd first come through the front door along with Light, now excused himself to Light and gave the other boy his full attention. "Yes, how can I help you?" The officer asked, perfectly polite. 

"Um…" The boy glanced briefly at Light, probably a little uncomfortable with his presence, but he didn't mention it and his gaze returned to the officer. "I saw a news story about a missing person…a–and I think I have some information on it?" 

At those words, something itched at the back of Light's mind. It couldn't be, right..? But even as he thought that, his attention shifted entirely to the younger teen. 

The officer straightened up too, his expression turning from friendly and open to serious. "Could you give me some more details about the missing person? The JPD would be grateful for any information you think you have on the case."

The boy wrung his hands as he spoke. "It's…you know, that guy …Raye Penbar." 

Light nearly jerked back when the boy spoke Raye's name, but he just barely managed to keep his body still. Ryuk, on the other hand, was cheering and doing summersaults in the air beside him. 

The officer leaned forward slightly over the counter in excitement, but stayed professional. "Please tell me what you know about the situation, anything you can tell me would be helpful." 

The boy nodded hesitantly, looking a little more sure of himself now. "Well…um…you see, the thing is that I think–no, I know that my dad is the one that kidnapped Mr. Penbar." 

Light's mind came to a screeching halt. What? That…wasn't what he'd expected to hear. What he expected, he couldn't say. 

"Excuse me for asking, but how do you know your father is involved?" The officer continued. 

"Because…b–because I–" The boy stuttered and then gulped, taking in one more shuddering breath before plunging forward with all the determination of someone who couldn't turn back now. "It's because I helped him do it."

The officer stared at the boy with wide eyes for a handful of seconds before finally saying, "I think I need to make a call."

About a minute later, Chief Soichiro Yagami would startle L by shooting up from his seat and demanding to know what the hell happened into his phone. 

~ 🅚 ~

"So one more time." The interrogating officer said as L watched from the security feed in the room. “Why did you come forward about the abduction?” 

“I…well, I felt bad. This whole situation is bigger than it was meant to be and it’s lasted way longer. This should’ve been over in a few days .” The teenager, Hinata Sato, answered. 

The officer listened to something on the other end of his earpiece before speaking again.“Tell us what happened.” 

“My dad…he’s a small-time criminal, he–he makes most of his money from targeting tourists and either robbing them or…holding them ransom for some money. He can get more money that way, but he doesn’t ask for more than most people can pay and so normally their friends or family just pay up and he let’s them go on their way. No violence or anything!” The boy in the suspect’s chair haltingly supplied the information. 

“You mean, more violent than the crime already is.” The officer pointed out tersely and, in L’s opinion, needlessly. 

The boy flinched but nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess.”

“And that is why your father targeted the Agent?” The officer moved on. 

“Yeah. It’s easy to tell who does and doesn’t live here, especially if they’re American, and Dad tries to only take people who were with someone else, otherwise who’d pay the ransom? The guy brought his wife here with him so he qualified, she’d probably pay the money quick.” The kid gave a dry laugh before sobering quickly and continuing. “The mark wasn’t such an easy one this time, according to Dad. This guy was super wary, he said. Always looking around, aware of his surroundings…I guess if he’s FBI that explains it.” 

“You gave the prior statement that you helped with the abduction. Is that correct?” 

The boy shifted uncomfortably. “Yeah, I did…only a little bit! Because this guy was a little harder to sneak up on, Dad asked me to draw him into a trap. Dad dragged me out to watch his apartment and for some reason, he left for an early morning walk. Dad thought it was the perfect time, he couldn’t waste that opportunity, so…” The boy shrugged, listlessly. 

“And how exactly did the two of you lure him into a trap?” The officer leaned forward, as did L. 

“Well, I’m young, most people don’t find me very imposing so they let their guard down. I approached the Agent and told him that my little sister needed help and I didn’t have my phone with me. He was willing to help, so I led him to the park across the street and Dad jumped him.” The boy shifted again. “He seemed like an okay guy, for what it’s worth.” 

“So you’re saying that Agent Penbar was kidnapped for ransom to his wife…why didn’t we receive any ransom demands?” The officer asked. 

“Well, we didn’t know anything about who he was or what he was doing here!” The boy defended, growing a little panicked before forcibly calming himself down. “Dad only paid attention to certain things and kept a watch on the guy after he’d tagged him! Normally, Dad would get information like a name and a phone number to call after the abduction, but…the moment Dad started asking questions, he found the guy was a government agent and that he was involved in the Kira Case, of all things–!” 

Here, both the officer and L stiffened, but the boy didn’t notice and continued on his tirade. “Dad freaked out, he didn’t want any part in that serious business, but he’d already made the mistake of kidnapping the guy and he didn’t know what to do! I suggested dad just let the guy go and forget about the whole thing, but Dad never listens to me and he was afraid the guy would be able to track us down if he did. Dad came up with the idea of blaming Kira for it all by writing some letter demanding they call off the Kira investigation in return for the Agent’s life and sending it to the investigators.” 

L was, at this point, clutching his microphone so tightly that his fingers began to bruise. Quickly, he lurched forward and muttered a question into it for the officer to ask. 

“How did your father know where L was?” The officer repeated, verbatim. 

“L?” The boy jerked violently, nothing but genuine shock on his face in response to the question. “What about L? Dad sent the letter to the hotel that he saw the Agent’s wife visiting. He started watching their rental place again after finding out he was an Agent working on the Kira case and figured the only reason she would go to some random place like that so soon after her husband’s disappearance was that she was being questioned by the FBI or by the Kira Investigators.”

The boy leaned forward across the table. ”Originally, he was going to send it to the police department but if he was right about the hotel, it would be a lot safer to hang out in the street in front of that without being noticed. If he was wrong, like the wife was meeting with a secret lover or something, then the hotel staff would probably notify the police anyway.” He shrugged. “Dad’s had more than one run-in with the police, so he understands that much. So Dad was thinking that he’d wait awhile after the letter and then let the Agent go and hope Kira would take the fall for the whole thing. Dad’s honestly pretty eager to toss the Agent out of our house and write it all off as a mistake from the start.” 

L’s fingers clenched tightly around the microphone he was still holding onto, even as he muted it. This…this wasn’t what he wanted. When Chief Yagami had gotten a call saying that someone had come to the police station and confessed to being involved in the kidnapping of Agent Penber, he didn’t know what to make of it, even as he leapt to take control of the situation. 

He honestly hadn’t expected anything to come of the press release, he knew that Kira wouldn’t be spooked by something so minimal and a call to the morality of a serial killer would amount to less than nothing. L quickly considered that Kira was controlling someone to take the fall for his crime or something of that vein…he would have to keep an eye out for if that person died in order to test it. He was completely staggered by this development and he felt his temper rise as he processed the information. 

If…if he were to believe this – what he was hearing – then Kira had nothing to do with any of it. Despite the fact that Agent Penber was actively investigating for the Kira Case when he was abducted , his abduction was arranged and carried out irrespective of that?! 

L growled underneath his breath. Was he really supposed to believe that? That this, all of this, had absolutely nothing to do with Kira or the Kira Investigation and it was all coincidental? Yet even as he hated the idea, it made some kind of sense. He could admit that the person who wrote the letter was more hesitant and wary than he could comfortably assume Kira to be. Kira had never kidnapped anyone before, although that wasn’t hard evidence against the fact that he could, and nothing had arisen after the letter was delivered. 

The boy’s narrative eerily fit into the evidence and that would be difficult for someone outside the investigation to make up. They’d need to follow up on whatever information the boy gave them, but…but if it proves to be true, then…

Then none of this had to do with anything!

“Um…L? Are you okay?” Matsuda hesitantly called out from behind him, causing L to realize that his growling had become audible to the other investigators who were in the room with him. 

“If you would all please, I’d like to be left alone for the moment.” L spoke quietly without looking at the other investigators, his hair hanging over his eyes. 

“Hey, wait a–” Aizawa started, but stopped in response to his Chief shaking his head and moving to step out of the room. 

"We'll contact Ms. Misora and let her know we've found her fiance alive and well." The Chief announced solemnly to the room, clearly to allow L his moment of privacy. 

The other investigators looked at each other in a confused silence before one-by-one moving to leave, with Matsuda hesitating the longest and shooting L a concerned look before he too left. 

After being left alone in the room, a second passed in which you could hear a pin drop and then L was up and throwing his chair across the room. 

Damn you….damn you, Kira! L seethed in his mind, his chest rising and falling rapidly. This whole time, none of it mattered. Yes, they could get the Agent back, but they were no closer to Kira because Kira hadn't been involved in it at all! He suddenly felt so frustrated, so agitated. Could all of this really be a coincidence? It felt completely unbelievable…and yet he was beginning to feel backed into a corner where he would have no choice but to accept that it was so. 

None of this had to do with anything!

This kind of ending made L feel robbed of any and all satisfaction, as if he hadn't solved the case at all. It was some stupid, petty little pickpocket and kidnapper.

He would have to talk to Watari later about making sure he wasn't followed like that again and they needed to follow up on whatever information the boy gave them in order to find Agent Penber, but at the moment, he was too seething with anger to do it. 

He still didn't know how those idiots managed to follow Watari of all people, but dumb luck did favor the dumb. It seared him like acid to know that he was attributing intelligence and meaning to what was essentially dumb criminals being lucky . It shouldn't have been like this!!

Damn it. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light could hardly believe the turn this case had quickly taken. It answered all of his questions…perfectly, in fact, but…

Light couldn't follow the case in person after the officer called it in, but he had Ryuk for that and what the Shinigami had reported back was both surprising and satisfying. Light had known that he hadn't had anything to do with the kidnapping of Raye Penber but he had still wondered if it had something to do with the Kira investigation or Raye's job with the FBI, but to hear that it was neither–! 

Well, it did explain everything, so Light was ready to wash his hands of the whole affair even as he prepared to continue keeping an eye on it to see how the situation developed. 

As I thought, the world truly is chaotic to the point where trying to assign meaning to everything is pointless. Light concluded. As annoying as all of this has been, life just likes throwing spanners into the works for no reason, I shouldn't be surprised. 

Ryuk appeared through a wall and flew down to land next to Light, who was lounging in the park across from the police station as he thought. Ryuk had taken off a little bit ago after telling Light about what happened in the interrogation, they both thought he should check on the Investigators and what they were doing about the situation. 

Looks like he's back, Light thought, composed. "Ryuk? What's happening?" He called out easily, already knowing that there was no one in the park to hear him. 

Ryuk cackled as he floated upside down. Sometimes he enjoyed this even more than Light did! "L's freaking out." 

"He must be…" Light muttered to himself. "If his reaction in the past when he was forced to admit that he wanted me to be Kira is any kind of a baseline, L's going to be furious! And for once, it's not my fault." 

He was still wrapping his mind around what they'd found out, honestly. "Is that it?" Light inquired, thoughtfully.

“Nope!” Ryuk practically sang, swirling in the air. “After L stopped throwing things–” Noted. “He got the information about where Raye is and he’s mobilized the police to the location. He’s also sent a few officers to arrest the father and bring him in for questioning. Oh! And they made a call to Naomi and asked her to come down to the police station. That was the first thing they did though, so she’s probably–” 

Light and Ryuk were jerked out of their conversation by someone huffing heavily and running down the street just in front of them. Light turned around instinctively to look at them and did a double take as he caught Naomi Misora running down the street to the police station, a terrified but also strangely hopeful expression on her face. Light launched himself up from the bench he was sitting on and sprinted towards the exit to the park, catching her just as she was about to pass it. 

“Ms. Misora!” Light called out, excitedly. 

The woman jerked to a stop and whirled around to face him. “Light!” She exclaimed, both her face and voice mirroring his own shock. 

“Fancy seeing you here! I was just hanging out in the park! What’s the matter, what’s going on? You look scared.” Light painted a frightened look onto his face.

If Naomi would have hesitated to share information before, her previous acquaintance with Light and her heightened emotional state basically threw that out of the window. “I just got a call from the Task Force! They said that they have a lead on where Raye is and they’re following it right now! They haven’t found him yet, but they said they had reason to believe he was okay…” Here, she couldn’t help the smile spreading across her face and was obliged to bring her hands up to her face to try and hide it from view. 

Light allowed his own genuine excitement to become visible and he grabbed her hands away from her face, holding them in his own. “That’s great! It’s amazing! You two will be together in no time, then!” If the person who kidnapped Raye really was that child’s father, then he’s probably been ignoring Raye almost entirely out of fear. The agent was probably fine! 

“But…” Naomi’s voice jerked Light’s attention back. “What if he’s…” She didn’t need to finish, the kind of worry he could read clearly in her eyes said it all. 

“Don’t say that, if the officers said that they have reason to believe he’s okay, then I’m sure it’s true.” Light decided to go the route of “blind faith in the law” as he comforted her. Light squeezed her hands in a gesture of support and he could see it settled her a little. “They wouldn’t give you false hope like that if things looked dire and you can’t think like that. They’ll bring Raye back to you in no time, I’m sure of it.” 

Naomi looked back at him with wide, glistening eyes before her lips spread into a soft, barely-there smile. “You’re right. I need to be strong and hold out hope that things’ll work out, especially now that they have a lead. Thank you, Light.” She sounded enormously grateful and it flooded Light’s chest with warmth. 

This, Light found himself thinking. This is the kind of quality relationship that I was missing in my past life. “Hey, now.” Light grinned brightly, letting go of her hands. “Don’t forget that even if you were FBI, it’s okay to be weak sometimes. You’ve had to deal with so much lately…and I admire you for being able to handle it and take charge as you have. You don’t always have to put on a strong front, remember.” 

“I’ll remember.” Naomi smiled a little wider at that. 

Light bit his lip as he contemplating something for a microsecond before lobbing an offer at her. “You know, if you need some support, I could accompany you to the police station. I was just there dropping something off for Dad and I wouldn’t mind hanging out for a while longer while you wait.” He made sure that his tone was very decisive, just to help convince her that he really didn’t mind doing it. He absolutely didn’t want her to turn him down on this. 

Naomi responded almost immediately. “Really? That would be great. Honestly, I think I would be eaten up by anxiety on my own…” She admitted. 

“Then it’s a good thing I’m here.” Light declared with good humor and linked their arms, gently pulling her towards the police station at a more sedate pace than she’d started. 

Naomi actually let out a small laugh in response and let him lead her, looking so much more at peace than she had a minute earlier. 

The receptionist at the station was surprised to see Light again but Light merely greeted him with a nod, prioritizing Naomi. He shepherded her over to one wall that had a row of chairs and they seated them both their to wait. They were strategically seated to be facing the entrance to the station, the front desk, and the doorway to the back of the station. Naomi clearly realized this and she appeared appreciative of it. As time passed though, she grew fidgety and Light reached out to hold her hand again. 

Light didn’t know how long they sat there waiting and holding hands, with even Ryuk being silent, but he definitely noticed when his father and a few other investigators that Light recognized from the Task Force blew in through the front door with a man they both definitely recognized in the center of them. 

“Raye!” Naomi burst out in joy, jumping up from her seat and running at him. 

The investigators and especially Agent Penber jolted at her exclamation, but Penber’s expression lightened upon seeing her and he lurched forward too, opening his arms in invitation. “Naomi, you’re okay!” 

The two met in the middle and the agent hugged his fiance to his chest as she wrapped her arms around his waist. The two buried themselves in each other and both Light and the police force watched it with a smile on their faces. Sadly, his dad eventually glanced away from the couple and noticed Light was there. 

“Light! What are you doing here?” Soichiro exclaimed loudly in shock, stepping away from the group and coming over to him. Light stood up to greet him. 

“I was dropping off some stuff for you, you’ve been away from home for so long…” Light excused, forcing himself to look bashful. “As I was leaving, I ran into Naomi and she told me what was going on. I was worried about her, so I offered to accompany her and she accepted. I see everything worked out okay.” Light nodded towards the embracing couple. 

Soichiro’s expression looked deeply comfortable and conflicted and Light thought he knew why. Light hadn’t done anything wrong, his behavior was both innocent and acceptable, but his father was nonetheless disconcerted with his presence because his continued presence in the middle of the investigation was adding fuel to L’s fire. His dad was going to have to report to L, once again, that Light had shown up in the middle of everything and subsequently endure L’s – in his father’s mind, unwarranted – suspicions. 

Naturally, as both a police chief and a father, he would’ve preferred it if Light had stayed out of the situation, but with the way that Light relayed the happenings of the day, Light’s behavior didn’t come across as sticking his nose into police business so he couldn’t be reprimanded for it. After a moment of watching his father think, wherein his thoughts were pretty much written across his face, Soichiro replied.

“Well, now that the situation’s being wrapped up, I’d appreciate it if you went home and got some rest.” Soichiro was clearly trying to get rid of him, but Light couldn’t pinpoint the main reason for it. Light did know that his performance a few days ago and his admission that he had a crush on L and he could tell that his father was having trouble knowing how to interact with him, even during this short conversation. Then again, it was the first time they’d seen each other since the surveillance started, so…

Then again, Light knew that despite the fact that he’d helped on cases before and his dad did ultimately expect him to follow in his footsteps in the police department, the man still liked to keep his family, including Light, far away from his job to protect them. This trying to shuffle him out of the line of fire wasn’t anything out of the ordinary for him from that perspective. 

A cell phone ringing drew both sets of eyes back to Naomi and Raye, the first of which hesitantly pulled away from her fiance to answer the phone. “Hello?” Her look of confusion at who was calling quickly turned into realization after she listened to the other person. “Yes. Yes, okay, Raye and I will be out front. You’ll send a car around? Alright.” She hung up and turned to Raye. Light and his father paced closer to the two, Light’s ears having pricked up at the mention of someone (he thought he knew who) sending a car around. 

“L wants to talk with us immediately. He said he’ll send a car around.” Naomi said to Raye. 

“L?” Raye repeated, his eyes wide in surprise. That’s right, Light reminded himself. Raye never met L and he was never supposed to. No wonder he looks a little starstruck, he’s about to meet the famous detective himself. Something he wouldn’t have been allowed to do if his kidnapping wasn’t the catalyst for this whole debacle. 

“Do you think you’re ready for that? Do you need to see a doctor?” She checked. 

Raye nodded solidly, giving her a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry about that, I’m okay. We can have a quick checkup afterwards, so we better go.” Naomi shot both Light and Soichiro a questioning glance.

“Go ahead, our guys will be right behind you.” Soichiro assured. Light gave her an encouraging nod and a smile of his own. She smiled at him once more before turning and heading towards the door with her fiance, who had his arms wrapped around her as they went. 

Light considered sending Ryuk to spy on them, but figured that the Shinigami had done enough for the day. Since he was in a good mood with the case’s conclusion and Raye’s safe return, he could let this go. Light glanced back at them as they left. I wonder what they’re going to be talking about?

~ 🅚 ~

Naomi was currently arguing with L about Light, being backed up by Soichiro and Matsuda.

“Why can’t you drop the surveillance?” Naomi demanded, in response to something L had said. “All of the testimonies, including the one Raye just gave, indicates that the culprit wasn’t Kira, so there’s no reason to keep Light under watch. Whether you’re convinced that Light isn’t Kira or not, it’s clear he wasn’t involved in any way. All he’s done is help!” 

“I disagree.” L calmly refuted. “Whether or not I’m convinced Light is Kira is exactly the issue with the video cameras.I agree that it doesn’t seem as if Light was responsible for this particular crime. However, that doesn’t mean that we should give up on observing him so soon.” 

“L, come on, this is crazy!” Matsuda insisted, leaning forward as he implored the detective. “Light isn’t Kira, there’s no way! Besides, it’s a massive invasion of privacy and we’ve already gotten Ms. Misora’s fiance back!” 

The man in question was in another room at the moment, getting an initial health check by Watari after giving his side of what happened. He’d had unfortunately little to add. After being kidnapped – or rather, after waking up blindfolded and tied up in a strange place – Raye had assumed that it was in relation to the Kira Case and so he had inadvertently outed himself as a member of the FBI. The criminal had been too skittish after that to say or do anything around him, basically avoiding him like the plague besides taking care of his basic needs. 

Honestly, he was embarrassed more than anything that as an FBI agent, he was caught off guard so easily by a low-level criminal acting alone. 

“I have no way of knowing what Light is or is not, right now. All we know for sure is that he’s mysteriously shown up multiple times in the investigation. And while I’m happy that Agent Penber is back with his fiance, that is not my larger concern. Finding and stopping Kira is.” L stated, simply. 

“L,” Soichiro interjected, solemnly. “What have we learned from the surveillance we’ve already done on my son and my family, in general?” 

L turned his back on the group as he hummed thoughtfully. “In the last several nights since we’ve installed cameras in the Yagami household, our surveillance has revealed…nothing. The Yagami household seems very innocent and Light Yagami, in particular, has done nothing suspicious.” 

“So then why do you keep refusing to drop it already?” Naomi asked, but she seemed to know what his answer would be. “It’s gone far enough.” 

“Kira kills at a slow rate and their kills aren’t consistently paced.” L noted for the others in the room. “It may take some time before we can come to the conclusion that Light is innocent in the killings. A few nights simply won’t do. The end of the kidnapping case doesn’t change that.” 

“Isn’t there something we can do to clear Light faster, then?” Matsuda practically begged. 

L froze. Then, slowly, he turned to face Matsuda who began to look nervous. “That’s a good suggestion, Mr. Matsuda. There may be something that might help clear Light and get the cameras out of the Yagami household quicker.” His spoke, his tone very low. 

“And…what would that be?” Matsuda hesitantly asked. The others leaned forward in anticipation of what the lead detective was going to say. 

“I think there is no better time for me to take a more hands-on role in evaluating Light Yagami’s innocence.” L mulled it over, aloud. “I think it’s time for me to meet Light for myself.” 

~ 🅚 ~

With everything going on the last week or so, his college entrance exams really snuck up on him. He’d barely remembered that they were even happening! But here he was, taking the written exam. Light had been one of the last to show up, but he hadn’t seen L. Then again, there was an empty seat somewhere behind him, so there was still a chance. 

It wasn’t a big deal, Light told himself, if L doesn’t show up and pretend to be a college student the way he had before. It was just…Light would admit that he really wanted to see L. Despite the fact that the detective was alive again, it had been an unbelievable amount of time since Light had seen him, with both of his human lives and his time as a Shinigami combined. 

He really wanted to see L. 

At first, Light had resolved to keep an eye out in case L came in, but he accidentally got too engrossed in the test. He quickly made a game of seeing how quickly he could complete it. Light had studied his heart out for it in his previous life, afraid of even the possibility of not living up to expectations by not getting the top grade out of all the applicants, but he was the possessor of an excellent memory. In his mind, he’d already studied for the test, gone through and completed college, and gained years of experience working with the police. 

He hadn’t needed to open a book this time and he was flying through the test. 

“You there!” Light jerked, but the proctor wasn’t talking to him. “Student number 162, sit properly in your chair!”

Light’s heart skipped a beat at those words. He couldn’t have remembered the exact wording of the order he’d heard all those years ago, but…but that was definitely–! Light turned around in his chair fast enough to hear something crack, but he paid it no mind. His attention was completely, entirely engrossed by the achingly familiar form hunched on a seat a few desks behind him. 

And Light gave the most brilliant smile. 

Chapter Text

Yes, yes…yes! Light chanted in his mind as he saw the hunched form behind him. L really never disappointed him. It figures. Through everything, he was the one person who never left me alone, who never abandoned me. Even after he died, the things he'd done in his life still came back to haunt me. 

L was unmistakable in appearance, as if Light couldn't remember every single detail like he had only seen him yesterday. That black hair that looked like he hadn’t brushed it in days, the eye bags that looked bigger than most race tracks, and his skin that was pale like paper. He was crouching on his seat behind his desk like a gargoyle and that particular comparison would’ve brought a smile to his lips if Light wasn’t already smiling. 

The only thing that surprised Light and nearly made him do a double-take was the name hovering over L's head. He honestly hadn't given it a single thought, but he could know L's real name now. He'd never found it out in his past life, not even once L was dead. Back then, he'd thought he had better things to deal with. His legacy . 

As if any imagined legacy was better than the man he'd sacrificed in the pursuit of it. 

Honestly, he'd been pretty determined not to think about L most of the time after his death back then. It was easier to convince himself that he was happy about his rival's death if he didn't think about it too hard. To attribute the hysterics that he'd fly into whenever he was alone shortly afterwards to over-the-top glee at his victory. Even calling himself L…in his head, he'd thought it was his private way of gloating…but maybe he was just trying to keep a part of L alive and had neither the strength nor the maturity to admit it to himself. Of course, that was before he knew the man had successors. It only occurred to him now how much he'd avoided reminders of the man until his own legacy, his successors, turned up.

But really? L Lawliet? He could hear Ryuk cackling next to him. His friend knew exactly what he was thinking. Light could hardly believe that it was really that straightforward! Fair enough, the last name was decently normal, but how did someone actually have a single letter for a first name? How! Were his parents on drugs? Light knew that only a person's true name could be used in the Death Note and hover above their heads, not assumed names, so what the absolute hell! 

Ignoring that for the moment, Light really was happy to see him. Maybe a bit too happy, he realized as Ryuk snapped his fingers directly in front of Light's face, startling him out of his unintentional staring contest with L. And it was a staring contest because there L was, staring right back at him unblinkingly as if Light's staring was perfectly normal. 

Then again, L's features were notoriously hard to read. He processed things mostly internally, although Light had gotten quite good at noticing when some things slipped out. 

"And you, number 727, face straight." The proctor ordered Light, jolting the young man once again. Reluctantly, Light forced himself to face forward without looking back at L. He realized how suspicious he was probably being and looking back at the other man would seriously risk Light getting lost in him again. 

Not that turning back to his work saved Light from getting lost in his own head. As Light filled out the questions on his exam, he thought about the person just a few seats behind him, becoming jittery in anticipation as he did. How could he not think about it? The man himself was only a couple feet away from him, likely paying some attention to Light even as he filled out his own test. 

Light was so nervous and excited at finally being with L that he had to stop his hand from shaking several times as he continued writing. His heart pounded in his chest, like it was trying to break free. 

When Light was done, he checked his answers just to be safe. He already knew that L would get 100% on all his exams that day and Light wasn't about to give up the chance to impress him by getting anything less than that. Light got up and handed in his test, the first one done. Finally. It has been the longest test of his life and he knew who was to blame for that. 

Speaking of, Light heard someone getting up from their seat as he made his way to the door. He had his suspicions about who it was but he still checked by turning his head just enough for him to catch sight of the person out of the corner of his eye. Yep, it was L. 

The detective in question had barely waited a second after Light finished before turning in his own exam and he figured that it was basically a given that L had been done since at least the time that Light finished, if not earlier, and he'd just waited until his suspect was leaving to leave himself. 

He waited for me. Light knew the practicality underlying the decision, but he still couldn't help the flutter in his chest and the flush of pride he felt that L had waited for him . 

Was he going to approach him in the hallway? Was he going to approach him at all? Last time…he hadn’t, right? Yes, Light remembered distinctly that the induction ceremony was the first time he’d spoken to L. Light felt his heart ache at the thought of that. This was the moment he’d been hoping for for what felt like forever, could he just let it go with one long look between the two of them and that’s it? 

…of course not. 

Light hung around in the hallway a little away from the door to the testing room and laid in wait. They’d have to move from the hall later when the rest of the examinees started finishing, but for now he figured they had time. That was, if he was successful in engaging L in conversation, but he had absolute confidence that he could do it, no problem. 

Given that he didn’t engage Light directly during this encounter in the previous timeline, his goals for the initial meeting was probably just to observe Light in person and gather intel on him. It seemed telling that he never talked to Light until the second meeting but continued to stare at him relentlessly, perhaps through the entire test. Yep, definitely an info gathering mission only. 

Well, that was about to change. 

Light leaned against the wall in the hall and started counting in his head as he waited for L to make his appearance. Ten seconds later, the door to the room opened and closed and out came the man in question. L was as casual as ever when closing the door behind him, as if he wasn’t following a lead on a serial killer investigation. That ended real quickly though as his hunched form turned to leave and L found himself facing Light, albeit the brunette was several feet away from him and still leaning up against the wall. 

The man froze , went still like a cat, and his perpetually wide eyes blinked several times at the unexpected sight. Light could almost see the question "what is Light Yagami still doing here?" written all over his face. Of course, the detective adjusted quickly, Light noted with admiration. L's expression shuttered a bit and he started heading down the hallway, this time his casualness seemed more affected than otherwise. 

It seemed like he was going to walk right past Light as if they were perfect strangers and just leave, but he wasn't about to just let that happen. 

"Hi!" Light gave a bright smile to the detective and waved him over. 

L's eyes flicked back to Light like a switch. He looked at Light as a few long seconds dragged by, but Light was used to the man's awkward silences by now and didn't show any reaction as he waited, smiling. 

"Hello." L replied simply, stopping shortly in front of him. 

Light's breath caught in his throat. It occurred to him only now that this was the first time he'd heard L's voice in years, unmolested by a voice changer, and it reverberated down his body and into his soul.

Light was pretty sure his pupils dilated. 

"So you finished early too, huh?" Light tried for a companionable laugh, but he detected a breathy note there that he hadn't intended. Very small, but as expected, the slight furrowing of L's eyebrows indicated he'd noticed. 

L was looking at Light curiously and, Light thought, with a small amount of surprise. L was one of those curious people whose emotions were difficult to read simply by looking at their face, but he considered "L reading" to be a skill that could be learned. 

“Yes…” L droned, peering up at Light from underneath his bangs with precision. “Well, sadly it seems I wasn’t the first one done, but oh well.” Something pricked at the back of Light’s mind as L finished his statement and he felt a rush of excitement. 

This was what L did, he’d almost forgotten in the heat of the moment! L often wrapped seemingly innocuous sentences in double or even triple meanings and Light would respond in kind, creating a war of words. Sometimes Light read his meaning loud and clear while other times he realized there could be multiple intentions with one line and he couldn’t pin down which was intended! It was delightful. 

In this case, Light thought he could pick up on two different intentions. One, L was trying to get him to lower his guard a little with the implication that Light was smarter than L and therefore didn’t need to see L as a threat. Two, it could be meant to keep him on his toes just a little since it brought more attention to the fact that L was behind Light by only a bit…too close for comfort, if Light was the sort of person who needed to be the one on top. Light chuckled, inwardly. This was going to be a fun reunion. 

Light gave a bright and friendly smile, not needing to fake it in the least when L was in front of him. “Don’t say that! I’m sure you could’ve finished much earlier if that proctor guy wasn’t bugging you. I’m not surprised you finished after me with him distracting you like that. I’m sure you would’ve finished first otherwise.” The brunette reassured. His almost concrete suspicions about L actually having finished first and waiting for Light to finish aside, he didn’t think L needed any cheering up, but it wouldn’t do to act like the elitist person L might still be expecting. 

Ryuk’s spying could only reveal so much about what L expected Light to be. The Shinigami couldn’t read minds and L was hardly honest with the other investigators about all of his thoughts. 

Light caught the slight widening of L’s eyes before his face straightened out again, the only indication of surprise but a significant one. “Thank you for saying so. You’re really too humble though. You beat me, fair and square.” L is such a fucking liar, Light thought fondly. “Is that why you wanted to talk to me?” L inquired, taking the initiative.

And straight for the jugular, as always. “No, it actually wasn’t. I just couldn’t come up with anything else to start a conversation with you.” Light smiled weakly and rubbed the back of his head in affected embarrassment. 

“Oh? Why, then, did you want to talk to me?” L prompted. His desire to know was palpable. 

“Well…” Light drew off, then restarted. “It’s hard to say exactly, something about you just struck me. I felt like I needed to talk to you. Pretty stupid, huh?” 

L was silent for an awkward amount of time, probably wrapping his mind around Light’s statement. Light basically told him nothing but at the same time, he was making a somewhat romantic claim to feeling a connection to him. It’s probably a lot of unknown to process. 

“I don’t think it’s stupid at all to rely on your instincts.” L finally admitted. 

"Really?" Light asked, beaming. 

"Of course. Our instincts often tell us things we're not ready to understand on our own. I wonder what yours are telling you?" He pondered, aloud. 

That question did unfair things to Light's heart when spoken in L's low tone. "Who can say?" Light returned, shakily. He jolted as he suddenly realized something. "Oh hey, I didn't mean to be rude. I just realized that I never introduced myself. I promise I'm not normally like this…my name is Light, Light Yagami." Light held out his hand for L to shake. 

L shook his hand easily enough, his grip very strong. "Hideki Ryuga."

Light was half-surprised when L didn't wipe his hand after shaking Light's, like he did shortly after they'd first met in the other timeline. Guess he didn't come prepared for it this day. It went along with a suspicion he'd always had, even back in that life. L had basically never shown himself to have a strong issue with germs except for that one time and the way he'd chosen to do it made Light think that it had been one of his many plots to try and unnerve Light to see how he'd react. 

" Hideki Ryuga? " Light gave the expected response, shock evident. "The same as that pop idol?" 

It was no wonder L used the same alias as before. The real Ryuga was popular at this time, very visible in the public eye, and more than that, L knows through his surveillance that Light saw Ryuga on TV and commented on his appearance so Light would definitely know him. 

"Yes, I get that a lot." L droned as if he actually had. I'll bet you do, Light scoffed mentally. "We do share the same name but as you can see, I'm not him."

"Clearly." Light agreed readily. "Unfortunate though, to share a name with a public figure like that." It would be cute if L took that as a passive aggressive comment from Kira about the power of knowing someone's name, but Light was actually just making small talk.

"Are you a fan?" L asked. 

"Of Hideki Ryuga?" Light blinked in surprise. 

"Yes." L confirmed. "I assure you that I won't look down on you if you like things such as pop idols, even if their target demographic is preteen girls. I myself like k-pop magazines." He made the admission as if it meant nothing and to him, it probably did. 

"Well, not really. My sister likes him, but I'm not really a fan of all the melodrama. He plays a lot of roles where he takes himself a bit too seriously for me to enjoy. You know, that's actually going to be a little awkward. Talking about him while using your name…" Light drew off with a laugh. 

L hummed, thoughtfully. "Well, you could always just call me Hideki. Shortening it a bit might help." 

Light smiled wider at the offer, surprised by it. "Thanks! I'll do that. And you can call me Light! So you like k-pop?" Light was momentarily distracted by the sound of multiple bodies shuffling inside the testing room. "I think the others are finishing up. Should we move elsewhere to continue?" Light asked, leadingly. He knew L wouldn’t hesitate to turn him down if the man wanted to, but he was hoping some persistence and L’s curiosity could make up the difference. 

“I really have to be going soon, I’ve made other arrangements.” L responded, calmly. 

“Is that so? But you finished early.” Light pointed out. 

“I was expecting that.” L assured him, but Light wasn’t going down without a fight.

“Are you sure you can’t spare just a few more minutes or maybe a half hour?” Light couldn’t care less how desperate he was sounding. “It seems like such a waste of the day not to get to know each other a little better. Especially since we’re probably going to make the Freshman Address together.”

“Freshman Address?” L asked. 

“Yeah. It’s this thing that higher-end colleges like To-Oh do during their freshman orientation. They have the top scorer among the incoming students read a speech, but you know, I expect to get 100% in all subjects. Considering how fast you finished, you might’ve too and if that’s the case…”

“The academy will likely ask us to make the speech together.” L said thoughtfully, finishing for him. 

Light nodded, excitedly. “It’d be a shame to not get to know each other beforehand if we’re going to be side-by-side up there in front of the whole school. So what do you say, do you have thirty minutes?” 

L peered up at Light thoughtfully for several long seconds, mulling it over, before he gave a slight nod of assent. “I suppose you are right about that, although your confidence in me might prove to be misplaced.”

“I doubt that.” Light waved it off. 

“I’m not the most social individual, but I suppose that I could spare a bit of my time. Would you mind if I made a call to my ride first to let them know I’ll be late?” L continued. 

“Sure thing, I’ll just step outside and wait for you there.” Light waved and turned to walk away. 

“Alright. I’ll be there in a minute.” L said behind him and Light headed outside. Light had to fight down the worry that L would try to sneak off when he wasn’t around. He didn’t think L was actually going to pull something like that, all Light had to do was wait like he said he would. 

He wasn’t going to let the detective go that easily. 

~ 🅚 ~

L didn’t understand. He just didn’t understand. 

None of this made any sense to him. 

This wasn't how it was meant to go. 

He'd never intended to engage with the suspect during this initial encounter, really. The plan had only ever been to watch Light, his behavior, and take mental notes. He'd finished his test before Light had, but he'd sat there in his seat as if he hadn't so that he could continue observing the young man. Of special interest was exactly how long it would take Light to finish. 

One test wasn't definitive, but it would give an idea of his intellectual capabilities. L had access to his grades and entire academic record, but that was a more removed line of inquiry while this was a live demonstration. 

Light had done little to no studying that L could see with his surveillance cameras, so how quickly he finished his test, along with his final grade on it, would likely represent his intelligence and raw knowledge base rather than his ability to cram (unlike multiple individuals that L could point out in their testing room). 

L found himself pleased with the time Light took to finish, it did indicate that he was quite intelligent, but when L exited the testing room, he came face-to-face with a certain Light Yagami who was waiting for him and what followed made him even more aware of something. Light was…different than L had suspected. L could admit, if only privately to himself, that both Kira and Light weren’t acting the way he thought they would. 

First, Kira. His initial profiling of the killer after he’d ascertained that the seemingly random deaths were all done by one person was that Kira was both idealistic and arrogant. The deaths of only serious criminals indicated that there was some moral judgment being cast on those people, a vision that was being worked towards. 

Of course, it was also idealistic to think that a perfect world could be achieved, no matter how many criminals one killed. The world would never be perfect and most people’s hard work and effort to improve it, like that of police officers, came to nothing. Only truly young people usually went out into the world filled to the brim with passion to change the world. The fact that only criminals were dying supported this version of Kira, someone with seemingly supernatural powers who thought that they could change the world. 

But then there were the additional facts that the person was killing at all and that Kira was mostly using heart attacks. L knew by now that it was possible that Kira could kill in ways other than heart attacks, so the fact that the vast majority of criminals were killed using that method was telling. It wasn't due to laziness or a lack of creativity, that much was clear from how Kira had conducted himself so far. No, it was meant to get the world's attention, so people would know that the deaths were no coincidence. And it worked, the many deaths of criminals by heart attacks was the thing that first alerted Interpol to the fact that there was either a person or a group behind it all. 

Kira wanted attention. And Kira thought he had the right to judge who was deserving of life and when and how they were to die. These were indicative of Kira's arrogance. The realization that Kira killing criminals made him a criminal himself seemed to escape the killer. Together, everything pointed towards Kira having a god complex or a feeling of exceptionalism, thinking that he deserved to cast judgment on others without being held to the same moral standard that he holds others too. Perhaps a narcissist. 

Except…when he confronted Kira over the tv, Kira did the unexpected. Yes, Lind L. Tailor was killed by Kira and it was while they were broadcasting in the area that L suspected Kira to be in, but that was the end of Kira's actions that were aligned with what L expected. The real deviations started when instead of just killing Tailor, he had something for the man to say. 

L didn't want to admit it at first, but now he was ready to say that Kira wasn't altogether behaving arrogantly. Or perhaps just not as arrogantly as L had anticipated. Kira had been aggressive and direct during the confrontation, but instead of trying to punish L for trying to catch him and proclaiming himself to be a judge or some archangel of justice, Kira instead took the opportunity only to reprimand L like an unruly toddler for using Tailor in such a way. 

While he'd initially thought that it was all performance meant to paint Kira as the "good guy", L couldn't afford to completely ignore the idea that Kira meant what he said. At any rate, Kira's words through Taylor spoke of Kira feeling some empathy, even for criminals. 

And Light. Even in their short interaction, Light was far less rigid and detached than L had expected. Light's behavior when he was in his own home aside, the brunette had always appeared to carry himself with dignity and detachment when he was outside. The report from Penbar and other sources painted Light as someone respectable, always controlled. 

The person he'd just encountered made him recall Naomi's description of Light, which instead showed someone who was kind and open, even a little bit adorable (in her words). It had seemed like an obvious act when L had first asked her about their interactions, with Light playing the role of a sweet younger man to appear non-threatening, but if it was an act, then it was one that Light was prepared to put on with anyone he interacted with, even a complete unknown like L. 

Because there was nothing cold or unapproachable about his interaction with Light so far, albeit there were several strange things about Light's behavior that rubbed L the wrong way. He'd first noticed the strangeness shortly after they'd started their testing when Light had turned and given L that smile . L didn't know what to do with it. 

It would have been more common for someone to frown or glare at him in that situation, since he was disrupting testing. If Light wanted to look the golden child, all he would've had to do was go back to his test and ignore him. Why would he smile like that like he was happy to see him? L was no one to him. 

Well, L considered as he called Watari. Of course, he made sure that Light actually left and wasn't listening in before he made the call. Not that he thought Light would have a good reason to listen in on his call with his current level of knowledge, anyway.  His little declaration of some connection between us might partially explain that.

L wasn't sure what to make of the situation in general, from Light's strange initial reaction to him to the young man waiting for him and wanting to talk. He couldn't decide if Light was telling the truth about feeling an inexplicable pull towards him. L couldn't say if it was his desire to know more about that that made him agree to Light's proposition. He'd tried to get out of it at first while staying polite, but Light had been strangely pressing about it. 

It almost made him wonder if Light really suspected that he was a detective. But that couldn't be possible without making one hell of a guess. Light Yagami had barely looked at him before reacting. Maybe Light's instincts really were just that good, but L couldn't come to any conclusions yet, as much as it rankled him. 

At any rate, the situation was that he'd accepted spending a short amount of time with Light "hanging out". What Light really wanted, he couldn't say. Because L hadn't outed himself yet, he couldn't determine whether Light wanted something from him or if Light was just being a normal teenager and trying to make friends. Alternatively, he could have decided L might be useful to him without knowing who he really is. 

It would make sense, L allowed. I was the only person who finished even remotely close to him, he probably feels like I'm the most likely to understand him. Even with my initial refusal, I would appear to be good friend material. Fine then, Light Yagami, if you want a friend then I'll pretend to be that for you. And hopefully you'll slip up and show your true colors. 

L found himself obliged to assure a mildly concerned Watari that he knew what he was doing and that he had a handle on the situation. He reluctantly told his assistant that he didn't know when or where he'd need to be picked up, but quickly hung up before the man tried to talk him out of it. He had a lead to pursue! 

L made his way outside, along with the other hopeful students that were now trickling out of the exam room and cluttering up the hallway. He barely paid them any mind, his thoughts occupied with one student only, and they paid him even less attention. Light had been the only student to give him any special attention. 

Light was waiting for him right outside the college entrance. The brunette clearly heard him approach and turned, shooting him another bright smile as he did. 

Curious, L couldn't help but again. This situation is far from what I imagined and I'm unsure how it could have gotten this way. What pull could he possibly be feeling for him to react to me in such a way? To Light, he said, "Sorry for the wait."

"That's alright!" Light waved away. "I was thinking we could tour the campus together. It's probably open all day today for testing, so why not take advantage of it? I'm sure we're both going to make it in, so it might be helpful." The young man was practically bouncing on his heels in excitement. L followed every movement. 

"If you're sure." L said by way of agreement as he started forward. "You sound quite confident in me, given your earlier comments."

"Which ones?" Light asked, jokingly. "When I said that we'd probably make the freshman speech together or when I said that if that awful proctor hadn't interrupted you, you'd have probably finished before I did?"

"...both." Was L's reluctant response, as the two walked side by side. There they were again, those two comments that completely floored L on multiple levels. 

By saying that L could have beaten him and that they would probably be tied for first place Light was being quite humble and, even more than that, non-competitive. Which was unexpected. 

L had initially taken Light Yagami as the competitive type. In L's experience, people who were intelligent and who were used to being on top of the hill were usually also the type who hated to lose, even battles over immature things like sports matches or grade point averages. Then again, he might just be projecting, since he was childish and hated to lose at anything, himself. 

It could have been an act as Light knew full well how to come off as amiable and respectable, but L would have to make more observations to see if Light was more competitive and resentful than he let on. In the meantime, this tidbit made him line up more with Kira's own behavior. As aggravating as it was to consider seriously, his initial assumptions about Kira's personality and perhaps even their motives needed some adjustments. To start off…Kira hadn't been overtly competitive either. Overtly. There could have still been some competition between the lines, but it was only that.

And then there was the fact that this was the second time so far that he'd mentioned the proctor bothering him. It almost seemed as if Light was more upset about the interruption than L himself was. He hadn't expected the boy to speak so disrespectfully about an authority figure (a Kira-like distaste for authority?) even if it was just them here and certainly not in L's defense. 

His research from all corners had at least agreed on one thing, which was that Light was unfailingly polite. Where was that now? L didn't know why it bothered Light so much…

…But he wanted to.

"You seem quite fixated on that interruption." L observed. 

Light blinked his large, golden eyes. "Well, it was frustrating. You weren't bothering anyone. If anything, he was the one causing a disturbance. And for what? Because he didn't agree with the way you were sitting? What a petty thing to get upset about!" Light scoffed, irritation lacing the sound. "And I didn't like the way he talked to you. Barking orders like you were his dog."

L…didn't know what to do with that response. He was becoming familiar with the feeling of being wrong-footed during this case. L wasn't used to anyone defending him, definitely not with the vehemence and emotion that Light was displaying. Light didn't even know him and yet he felt so incensed on L's behalf. What was the meaning of it? 

Was Light just a kind soul like Misora proposed? Could he possibly be putting on an act to gain L's favor, could that be it? L had wanted to meet Light for himself to get to know his suspect's personality without anyone's else's opinion coloring the data, but now that he was making his own notes, he found himself far less satisfied than he imagined. 

L wanted to push forward. To get something he knew how to use. "Light, would you mind if I asked you a controversial question?" 

"Of course, Hideki." Light glanced over at him brightly, the false name that L supplied rolling off his lips easily. 

It's not normal for acquaintances to refer to each other by their first names in Japan. L contemplated. But not only did Light accept us doing so without the slightest hesitation, even going so far as to appear happy about it, but he hasn't slipped up once by using my last name. He wants to be close to me, but by how much? Certainly closer than he's stated. I suppose it's convenient for me if he wants us to get that close, it'll be all the easier to get him to talk and to observe him. 

"What do you think about Kira?" L dropped the question onto his companion without further preamble, ensuring the teen wouldn't have enough time to prepare himself for such a question.

What will you do now, Light? Naturally, you'll want to profess your support for the police, that's a given. The average person, regardless of Kira's rising popularity in the shadows, would be too self-conscious or maybe too aware to openly support Kira. Most would keep their true feelings secret from even their close friends and family. Kira IS a serial killer being investigated by the police, after all. This is especially the case in Japan where uniformity is accentuated.

Regardless of their leanings, the average person would support the police, outwardly of nowhere else and Light isn't just anyone. He's Japan's rising star and golden boy, trying to get into the best college in the whole of Japan, and the son of the Chief of Police. If anyone needed to outwardly appear to conform to social norms, it was the person in front of him. 

L's eyes dragged slowly over Light's perfect appearance. He was everything that Japan thought admirable and successful. No, what L was looking for in his question wasn't honesty. He didn't need it, he could look between the lines of whatever answer Light gave him and pick apart what kind of person Light actually was underneath the facade of a perfect student and so that everyone seemed so taken with. 

Bafflingly, Light didn't look surprised at all by the question. Nothing changed on his face, his steps didn't pause or stutter, and even after L spent a moment half waiting for it, there were no demands to know why he had brought up such a topic. L watched as Light closed his eyes in thought, mulling his answer over for a second, before sighing and opening his eyes again. They pierced into L seriously and the older man met the gaze head-on. 

"I think that Kira is an interesting criminal, I can see why L is so obsessed with him." Light stated. 

L stopped walking. He…betrayed an interest in Kira. L noted, nonplussed. One could even interpret that to be a compliment of Kira. And he was willing to admit to it, even while calling Kira a criminal. Did he feel no particular worry about the damage to his image..? “What do you mean by that?” He asked, his voice more neutral than he felt. 

“Hm? Well, I just mean that L only takes cases he’s interested in and since he confronted Kira directly basically immediately, I just thought he was kinda obsessed with him.” Light supplied, answering the question he thought L was asking. 

A switch flicked in the back of L’s mind. “How did you know that L only took cases he was personally interested in?” L knew for a fact that until his confrontation with Kira, he had not been a household name. Not only was his name and face always hidden until this point, but his very existence wasn’t well known to those outside of Interpol. Could it be part of what Soichiro Yagami had told his family about him?

Light got a caught expression on his features for a second, before he quickly wiped it away. “You got me!” He admitted, easily. “Truth is, I had a little bit of inside information on L before this whole thing started. My father is actually the Chief of Police here and he’s known about L for a while.” And there was L's verification.

Light made a show of looking embarrassed at admitting that, but L didn’t buy it for a second. He wouldn’t be surprised if Light had always intended to bring up his connection with the police to make himself seem more influential and impressive, which would further indicate that he was working L without needing to know his identity. The question for L was whether or not he would reveal to Light who he really was and at which point he would do it. 

He would admit to some reluctance on his part to out himself as the Detective L. Surprisingly, it wasn’t due to any fear on his part that Kira could or would kill him for it, he’d taken all reasonable precautions, after all. No…his “fear”, if one could call it that, stemmed from something more uncomfortable. Light’s little confession to his sister on camera brought forward the uncomfortable possibility of the boy actually having a crush on L, which complicated matters since he was the main suspect in the Kira Case so far. If that was really true, then he wasn’t certain that outing himself as the object of the boy’s affection was the best course of action. He had…no way of knowing how Light would react. 

He could come up with two main ideas and yet there were a dozen other smaller, more unlikely possibilities. Most likely, upon meeting his idol, L wouldn’t live up to the image that Light’s schoolboy crush and admiration had conjured up and said crush would evaporate. Contrary to what he’d told the Japanese investigators, he had shown himself once or twice before during previous investigations, but it was so rare as to have been practically nonexistent and contrary to popular thought, L did go out to things like restaurants on occasion instead of being a perpetual hermit. L knew that he was considered incredibly strange by the vast majority of people, some even considering him creepy enough to call the cops. That got slapped down pretty quick, but the underlying problem remained, that people were uncomfortable in his presence. 

If Light Yagami truly felt something for L, it was clearly only a crush on an authority figure who seemed removed and perfect, it couldn’t possibly be anything more. Light had never met him before. It was obviously a common case of a young man or woman idolizing a character who seemed larger than life, the reputation of someone who had never lost a case preceding him and the mystery of the detective who never showed his face making it even more enticing. Instead of pointing his hopeless affection at a teen idol, Light did it towards the best detective in the world, feasting himself on snippets of whatever scant information his father had to give him. 

It made sense. Light was the son of the police chief and an aspiring detective himself, one day. It made perfect sense that of all the authority figures he would idolize enough to form a crush, it would happen this way. Light had seen many put-together detectives in suits who walked with their backs straight and stony expressions; it would be easy for him to fantasize in his room and build an idea of what his dream L looked like. He would expect L’s appearance and habits to be as impressive as his record and even if L wasn’t lacking in the social skills department, it was severely unlikely that anyone could live up to the perfect dream version of themselves that someone else concocted. No one was as perfect as a dream, that much he knew after living so long as a detective. 

Nonetheless that would be the most convenient outcome since then both L and Light could pretend the crush never was to begin with. They would never speak of it and they could both pretend that meeting L wasn’t a disappointment to Light, the same way it was to everyone else. 

Unfortunately, that wasn't the only option which was the cause of L's concern. However unlikely he thought it was, if the admission of his identity only caused Light to aim his affections more firmly towards himself now that he had his crush within arm's reach…

It would be extremely detrimental to the case for that particular complication to continue, nevermind his relationship with the other investigators who were Chiefly unhappy with the way the case is currently going.

"But it's okay." Light started talking again. The young man turned to look at L with a secretive smirk and his eyes glittering mischievously. "Because I have a feeling that Kira is obsessed with L, too."

Chapter Text

"Hello, Light. How did the test go?" His mother said by way of greeting when he got home. 

"It went fine." Light answered carelessly, his mind elsewhere. 

Unseen by one of them, Ryuk was swishing about the home, looking quickly in certain corners, checking for something.

"You must be tired." His mother observed, looking worried but proud. "You should go up and take a nap." 

"Thanks, I think that's a good idea." Light said, already heading up to his room. Ryuk came back and swirled around him wordlessly, as Light made his way upstairs and quietly closed his door behind him. 

Saying nothing, Light dropped his bag onto his desk chair and flopped back onto his bed, resting a forearm over his eyes and letting out a deep sigh. 

"Hey, Light. The cameras are still here!" Ryuk sounded surprised. Light had asked him to keep checking the house as well as his bedroom every time they came home after a long absence. "I thought they would at least take the cameras out the day that L chose to confront you. This is much longer than last time!"

It is , Light agreed silently. He wasn't bothered by it, mind, but L was certainly being stubborn about it this time. He wondered if it was because of him. It must've been something he'd done.

At any rate, L still wanted to stalk him and Light was happy to oblige. Right now, he was truly tired though. The test was easy enough, but the encounter with L took a lot out of him. Meeting him again after so long, before so much of their relationship happened, was a lot . In a way, it felt like that moment when he’d woken back up in his room right after dying a second time, that jarring feeling of looking around you and seeing things just the way they were before…the feeling that absolutely nothing in your world had changed except for you. 

Things had changed, of course, he’d changed them…but for a moment, looking at L and listening to him talk, he felt once more as if things had never changed at all. This was L before they’d ever met, before the investigation really got going, before the man had died trying to catch him…

Being with L was perfect, it made Light feel like his world had gotten several shades brighter. After all, it was L . L, who never took him at face value. L, who challenged him relentlessly. L…who always looked at him like a person, rather than an idol or some perfect being worth admiring. He felt human when he was with L, he always had. 

“I know who you’re thinking about!” Ryuk joked, doing spins above Light. “I’ll bet you’re real happy right now, you’ve been waiting for this!” Ryuk cackled loudly, unheard by the cameras and other equipment. “I can’t imagine L’s as happy as you, though! You really had to go and say that stuff, didn’t you! HA!” 

I am how I am, Light hummed in his mind. At least I gave him a little something. 

“You should really take a nap.” Ryuk stopped spinning and peered down at him. “You look beat.”

Probably right about that, Light thought as he yawned. We’ll…have more fun later. Sleep first. 

~ 🅚 ~

L was immensely frustrated at the moment. He detested the fact that he had to work closely with others at all for this case. He preferred to work mostly alone, with limited contact with others outside of ordering them to perform specific tasks for him. 

Most people were, in fact, mostly useless to him when it came to solving cases. He found that they rarely performed their assignments half as well as he would have done and he had to give them very detailed instructions that needed to be followed to the letter in order for them to get anything of quality accomplished. The only person L was aware of that could get important tasks done well without detailed instruction was Watari and the man had been with him a long time. 

These investigators though, in particular, were an incredible hindrance. Most officers had the good sense to be unobtrusive and keep their mouths shut, but he supposed it was only fair to lose that in return for having a group of more trustworthy individuals who would stick with the case loyally. Mogi and Ukita were the most reserved and respectful ones of the bunch, they weren’t particularly helpful but he had no further complaints. Matsuda was completely useless. He was mostly taking up space, the Chief was experienced in babysitting him, but the young-seeming man still found ways to bother him. 

Aizawa was by far the biggest hindrance in the case, he honestly wished the man had just quit with most of their department. Aizawa clearly hated him. L was convinced that the man took exception to his very existence, everything he did served only to make the man irate. Not that L was trying to get on the man’s good side, but he wasn’t actively trying to agitate him, either. The man was forever glaring, arguing, and yelling. He fought with L on each of his plans on principle, arguing just to argue at this point. Anything L said to try and calm the man down had the opposite effect, which was extremely vexing. 

L was grateful that Chief Yagami was still intervening whenever Aizawa got too troublesome and dragged him back into line. All of the investigators highly respected their chief and he seemed to have quite the experience in managing them all. Although it would have been troublesome, he would have understood if Soichiro had stopped aiding him with what was going on currently, but the fact that he was spoke to his professionalism and his dedication to the Kira Case. 

It was easy to see how much the elder Yagami was troubled by L’s dealings with the younger Yagami. L had known the man was upset when he first proposed investigating the Yagami family and then even more when he wanted to put them under video surveillance. The man kept his composure and gave his permission for it all, but it was clear he resented the suspicion his family was under. It was a dangerous thing, pushing too hard on the one investigator who was most useful to the group, L knew that and he didn’t make the decision lightly. And to show for it, he had…nothing. 

Kira was truly frustrating and so was Light. Kira didn’t kill on any sort of a schedule and even trying to average out the kills was impossible to do accurately. Kira, it seemed, killed whenever he felt like it. 

There was no discernible pattern that L could see and he had spent a sizable amount of time analyzing each killing that was reasonably attributable to Kira. The only common thread tying them all was that each person killed was a serious criminal. Everything else varied, including the locations of the criminals. Most of the Kira killings occurred in Japan, England, and America, but they occurred in smaller numbers all over the globe. There was a recent killing just reported in India the previous day, a serial rapist and child abuser, apparently. 

Averaging didn’t help because it was common for Kira to go through times where they ramped up their murders or for there to be long stretches where the kills slowed to practically nonexistent. Because of the complete lack of a schedule, Kira’s killings were already highly variable. If there were any significant shifts while the Yagami household was under surveillance, it would be worth absolutely nothing. If L was going to prove Light had anything to do with the Kira killings, he needed to either observe suspicious behavior in Light or prove that it was Light’s behavior that was fluctuating in response to the killings rather than try to prove the reverse. 

But Light was refusing to give him anything to work with and L was starting to get peeved. For the entire time that L had been watching him, Light had never once watched any type of news program nor did he read the newspaper. While he might have been able to catch up on the news outside of the house, there was no way to prove that! Additionally, Light spent little time on his computer and the only websites he visited were completely unremarkable, he didn’t even go on any social media. He didn’t make many phone calls or text much on his phone, Soichiro explained this by saying that he didn’t know of any close friends that Light had, implying that he may not have any. 

Overall, L didn’t think it was actually possible to be any less suspicious than Light was being. And it was precisely that which made him even more suspicious to L. This, all of it, was unnatural. It reeked of someone putting on an act to appear innocent. He couldn’t prove that it was just that yet, but it was setting L’s nerves alight. Light did appear to be an exceptionally intelligent teenager, but he was still a teenager; they hung out with friends, blew off their work, had vices . 

But Light…the only thing that can possibly be construed as bad was that he didn’t actually study very much, but he continued to be the highest scorer so it was a non-issue. Otherwise, every second of Light’s behavior on camera screamed innocence, but no one was that perfect. His instincts screamed at him that Light was Kira, no matter what evidence to the contrary the others pointed out. 

L had known since he’d come to the inescapable conclusion that Kira had to be using some unknown superhuman ability in order to commit these killings, that this would be a landmark case for him. Nothing else he had done would ever compare. However, he hadn’t quite appreciated how frustrating the process of solving it would be and even if some of the hardship was down to chance, he blamed one individual in particular for just how difficult his current situation was.

He could feel Mr. Yagami’s eyes boring a hole in the back of his skull.  

It wasn’t his fault that he had been watching Light sleep for the last thirty minutes. 

L had gotten back from the college before Light got to his house, owing to the fact that L was taken back in a car and Light had walked home. Light appeared to go straight home and the moment he got there, the young man headed straight to his room and took a nap. Even if he left, someone would have to watch the cameras to see when Light woke up and he didn’t want to miss out on any observations by walking away unless Light was down for the night. L couldn’t afford to give any leeway in case Light was pretending to be asleep. That was, if he somehow knew about the surveillance, which L was still figuring out how to prove or disprove. 

L was in no way enjoying staring at the man as he slept, but making that fact known was unlikely to improve the chief’s mood at all. 

L had never cared about observing social graces or being cautious about his treatment of others. He evaluated whether a certain act would be advantageous enough to go through with it and took action depending on that. He’d never concerned himself with locating lines that others thought shouldn’t be crossed, it was part of what created his flawless record. He was willing to do anything to solve a case, whereas lesser men had scruples which held them back atrociously. 

But this was different. L needed, at least for the moment, to work with these men. Unfortunately, his treatment of his subject in this case was directly tied to his relationship with the other investigators and the worse that became, the more he was held back in this most important case. To some extent, Soichiro may have always balked at L’s blatant disregard for the rules but he was almost as dedicated to the case as L himself. The crux of the matter really was that the person who was quickly becoming his prime suspect was the man’s son. 

This would not end well if L couldn’t justify both his suspicion and his methods soon. He needed a good piece of evidence now more than ever to justify all of this.

If Light hadn’t announced his crush on L, then this part of the surveillance wouldn’t be so much of an issue. Initially, the investigators only voiced concern for putting Soichiro’s wife and daughter under constant watch, they’d never considered the violation of Light’s privacy in the same way. L knew why, women were given special attention when it came to their modesty and privacy versus men. However, Light’s declaration had brought all of their attention to the fact that Light’s modesty was under assault with the cameras installed as well and everything that L observed, as a result, was looked at with more suspicion. 

He doubted he was going to make much headway in the case until the freshman ceremony, which was the reason L chose to engage Light directly in the first place. He refused to drop the surveillance because he didn't want it to be labeled an unjustified waste of time, but he got the distinct feeling that the case would be nearing a dead end if he didn’t take the drastic step of putting himself on the line by engaging his suspect directly. 

L quietly simmered as he watched the cameras and a sleeping Light Yagami, feeling frustrated with his lack of progress. He didn’t actually want to wait for the ceremony to engage with Light again, but he had no clear way of catching up with Light again until then. 

Maybe I should have given him one of my numbers, L pondered deeply. Even if they’d only just met, Light likely wouldn’t have been able to refuse his contact information out of politeness. If he had, then he would’ve had a way to contact Light that wouldn’t seem suspicious to the chief’s son, but by the end of their conversation, L hadn’t had the presence of mind to consider it. His mind was bogged down by the rest of their conversation.

Light’s startling comment about Kira being obsessed with L blotted out all other considerations for a time. It rang in L’s ears like a confession, but he knew full well that it might not be. It could easily be argued that Light was just speculating about Kira, as L himself did…but it didn't sound that way. As Light had looked at him, as L heard the tone of his voice, Light sounded almost like he was giving some kind of secretive confession, a playful one. 

Infuriatingly, it was so effective at captivating him that L only realized several hours after he'd gotten back to his current hotel room and had gone over their conversation several times in his head that Light had never actually answered his question about what he thought about Kira. Sure, he said Kira was interesting, but that was it. He didn't even say why he thought Kira was interesting. It was intentionally vague and L hadn't noticed at the time!

It exacerbated his foul mood to realize how off-balance he'd been during that encounter. Normally, L would have asked more probing questions in response to Light's partial answer, but the boy's diversion had been disconcertingly effective. 

But didn't that make Light just like Kira? Every time he thinks he has the upper hand, the killer does a complete 180° turn and suddenly he's lost again. L wouldn't let this rest. He would revisit that conversation with Light, no matter what he had to do. 

At the moment, though, he'd settle for Light just waking up already so Mr. Yagami would stop looking at him like he was a creep. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light stretched as he got up from his nap. Ignoring the knocking on his door that had initially woke him up, Light checked his clock. He'd been asleep for a little under two hours. 

That should be enough, he hummed blearily. He stretched his arms above his head until he heard something crack and eased himself out of bed, winding his way to the door. Just before Light made it to the door, the knob started shaking and his sister’s voice called out, “Light? What’s up? Why is the door locked?” 

Sayu? Light got to the door and unlocked it before swinging it open. Sure enough, his sister was on the other side, waiting for him. It wasn’t terribly common, but well, it wasn’t like she hadn’t come to visit him in his room before. Usually, to ask him for help with her homework. She had a “genius older brother”, after all. 

“Hey, Light! You doing anything right now?” She asked, peering past him into his room. 

“No, I just woke up from a nap.” Light replied. 

“Oh, right. Mom said not to bother you because you were tired, but she also said that if I needed help with homework, I should ask you and here I am!” She smiled at him. “If now’s not a good time, we can do it later.”

Of course. “No, now’s fine.” Light stepped back into his room to give her room to come in. 

“Great!” She hopped into his room and pushed his extra chair up to the next. Light slid down next to her while she rooted around in her backpack and placed all the things they needed on his desk. “I’m ready!” 

And so, they started on the work. The work was incredibly easy to understand for himself, the real trouble was slowing himself down to explain it to his sister. He didn’t want to just tell her the answers or she wouldn’t learn anything, so he had to figure out how she learned it best and teach her like that. 

“Oh, I see! So I can find the answer that way!” Sayu beamed as she finished another problem. 

“That’s right.” Light nodded. “Just solve it that way from now on, rather than how the teacher showed you. It’s a lot less confusing. And if the teacher doesn’t like that you’re not following his process, then just solve it first your way and then write down his steps over the answer and pretend that’s how you got it. Hopefully it won’t come to that, but teachers can be weird sometimes; their ego gets too tied into their job and they don’t always like change.”

“You sound like you know a lot about it, have you ever had to use it yourself?” His sister asked. “The professor part, too.” 

“Sort of. I took the route of pouring over the teaching instructions, trying and trying again until I got it right the way the teacher wanted it.” It was what was expected of me. “I took plenty of extra classes though, which you don’t, so it’s easier for you to just learn the way that’s easiest for you.” Light sighed, thoughtfully. “As for the part about professors, I’ve just been through a lot of school in my life. You’ll have that experience too, one day, and you’ll get familiar with how certain people in specific professions think and act.” 

Sayu looked like she was awed by the wisdom he’d gained from experience, but then her expression turned thoughtful and troubled. “Now that you mention it…why don’t I have to take extra classes? Dad’s never brought it up to me.” 

Because you’re expected to go out and have fun like a teenage girl, while I’m expected to put my head down and work hard towards my career as the eldest son. He’s proud of my achievements, but you’re his little girl. He values you just for existing, Light shook his head vigorously before the thoughts could take root too firmly. He didn’t want to be thinking this way in the few interactions he had with his sister, but it just kept coming to mind. “It’s probably because I always wanted to be a detective like Dad, since I was a kid, and that takes a lot of schooling. Besides, I’m good at school so the remedial classes aren’t too much pressure.” 

“...” Sayu stared up at him for a bit. “And what about your love life? Are you as good at that?” She asked, at last. 

Huh? “Where did that come from?” Light blinked at her in surprise. Even Ryuk stopped playing around in his room and looked up at Sayu’s comment. 

Sayu looked embarrassed at the question. “Well, I’ve been wondering about it since you first talked about it when I was watching my show. I’ve never really heard you talk about your personal life and you never brought any girls around the house, so when you suddenly started talking about your interests…I was really surprised. Not just that you like…um…guys…that’s okay!” She hastened to reassure. “But you’ve never mentioned liking anyone or anything before, not even a character trait…I was really happy to know that you had a crush, because it gives us something to talk about!” 

“Something to talk about?” Light leaned back in surprise when his sister leaned forward into his space in her excitement. 

“Cute guys!” Sayu’s eyes sparkled. “You might not like Hideki Ryuga, but now we can talk about cute guys together! I know you said you like that detective, but none of us have ever seen him so were there any cute guys in your old school?! You know, now that I think about it, both of us have our favorite idols we wish real guys were like, but neither of us will ever meet ours…we’re more alike than I thought!” 

Light blinked quietly in surprise as he stared at his sister going on one of her tirades. “Uh…well, I…” 

“Come on, Light! Cute guys!” She pleaded, leaning closer. 

“Hum…well…” Then, Light remembered something and suddenly, he felt a lot more at ease with the situation. “Funny you should say that, Sayu. I don’t like that Hideki Ryuga, but…” He then drew off, teasingly. 

Sayu blinked, her face falling back into confusion. “Wait, ‘that’ Ryuga?” 

“Yeah, that Ryuga.” Light nodded, sagely. “Apparently there’s another one, I met him at the To-Oh testing today.” And then, emboldened by Sayu’s own excitement and riding high on the wave of it, he leaned forward conspiratorially. “And he’s actually pretty cute.” 

“What?!” Sayu’s hands shot to her mouth as she looked back at him in surprise and glee. “You found someone cute! And they actually have that name?”

Light smiled. “That’s right, he was in the same testing room as me and introduced himself afterwards. His name is actually Hideki Ryuga, can you believe it?” 

“I can’t! That’s amazing! Do they look anything alike?” Sayu pried. 

“Not at all.” Light laughed. “I don’t think it’s actually possible for them to look any less alike. And I can’t speak to this part of the actor, but my Hideki is really smart. He finished early, just like I did, while everyone else in the testing room was struggling.” 

Sayu stared at him, almost like she was seeing him afresh, then she got a teasing look in her eyes. “ Your Hideki, huh? You must really like him!” 

Light felt the dopey smile spread across his face without being able to stop it. “He’s great. I’ve only just met him today, but I already think he’s different from everyone else. He’s awkward and I don’t think he socializes much, but he has a sharp mind and he pays a lot of attention to me.” Light smiled down at his lap. “From the moment he came out of that testing room, it felt like I was always the center of his attention, even when he acted casually. And when we talk, he challenges me.” 

~ 🅚 ~

L could’ve called the Yagami house to thank Sayu Yagami the moment that she showed up at her brother’s room and woke him up. Finally, Light was awake and that meant maybe the chief would calm down with his staring and glaring. L was quite used to hostility, but it was really starting to get on his nerves when he was trying to gather information. L pushed his bowl of marshmallows closer to the other detective in the hopes of momentarily distracting the man from his suspicions of L. 

What he failed to remember in that moment, was that Light Yagami was in the habit of causing him more trouble while awake than he ever had while sleeping. After a short reprieve of Light being a good older brother and tutoring his sister with her work, they started talking about Light’s interests. L sat forward at this turn in the conversation. There might be something new here that he can use to further his profiling. So far, he’d only been able to make a detailed catalog of Light’s favorite love dramas. 

Unfortunately, Light’s sister seemed to be most interested in that direction, bringing up her favorite actor from whom L had taken his alias for the day. Just as L started to think that Light would confess to liking dramas and the two would bond over that, the conversation took a surprising turn. 

“I don’t like that Hideki Ryuga, but…” 

L realized immediately where this was going when Light said that or, at least, he thought he did. He couldn’t quite figure out why Light would bring him up to his sister, but it was clear that he was. As the conversation between the two progressed, L grew more and more uncomfortable. His instincts were telling him that something was off about the way that Light was talking about him, that it wasn’t how one would expect someone to talk about someone they wanted to befriend…

He wasn’t the type to ignore his instincts, but knowing what they were trying to tell him was something else. He didn’t have to puzzle over it for long, however. Sayu Yagami’s next words finally brought it home for him. 

“ Your Hideki, huh?” Sayu Yagami teased. “You must really like him!” 

You have GOT to be kidding me, L realized. Time seemed to slow for him as he realized the impossible situation he was starting to perceive he was in. It was inconceivable that his suspect was enamored with him as the detective L, but now there was also the nearly unbelievable addition that the boy was now gaining a crush on L as his classmate, Hideki. I am beginning to wonder…if my luck is really this bad. 

Because what else could this be? Unless Light had the preternatural ability to identify L in all forms (a line of thought that could currently be neither proved nor disproved), L was having the worst luck of his life. His identity as Ryuga was supposed to be for fading into the background and observing until he thought the time was right to be direct with his suspect, but Light had immediately reached backstage and tugged him into the center. 

And L still had trouble understanding why Light would have a crush on him in any form. 

Well, Light apparently had some answer for the latter. “He’s great. I’ve only just met him today, but I already think he’s great. He’s awkward and I don’t think he socializes much, but he has a sharp mind and he pays a lot of attention to me. When he came out of that testing room, it felt like I was always the center of his attention, even when he acted casual and when we talk, he challenges me.” 

He could acknowledge that it made some sense when put that way. Of course he had been watching and listening to everything Light did and said intently, Light was the whole reason he was even in that school, but there was no way for Light to know that. For him, L was likely just a student, close to himself in intelligence, that paid attention. He’d had no idea that Light had taken his attention in such a way, but if the boy felt he was lacking in attention from others, perhaps that was enough to initially garner his interest. Of course he was also challenging Light, but it wasn’t anything so friendly as it might have appeared. He was trying to see if Light would slip up and out himself as Kira!! Which he may have done? That little comment Light had made about Kira felt like a code passed between them, an admission.

L still wasn’t sure what he thought about this said affection of Light’s, whether it was true or if there was some other explanation that he hadn’t figured out yet, but he had no choice at this point but to accept that it may be. 

Light didn’t see his sister’s expression while he was talking, but L easily noted the soft expression on her face. He didn’t like it being shown during this conversation, but he made a mental note of it all the same. 

“Ryuzaki…” Soichiro started, his tone drawing L’s attention - although not his gaze - from the screen. He sounded like he was struggling to control himself. 

“Yes?” He inquired, still staring straight at Light and his sister continued talking. 

“What happened between you and my son when you went to his college exams? And why is he calling you ‘Hideki’ instead of ‘Ryuga’?” The man asked with affected calm. L chanced a side glance at the man before his gaze flicked right back to the screen and the Yagami siblings. Chief Yagami was staring down at his lap with determination in a way that hid his eyes from view, his hands clenched. 

L let out a thoughtful hum at the question, considering his answer. “To answer the second question, Light thought it would be awkward for him to call me by the same name as a famous movie star, so he got permission to call me by my first name as a distinction. As for the first, I assure you that nothing of note took place. I assure you, Light and I just talked.” 

“You say you just talked to him, but with what Light is saying–” The man couldn’t continue and cut himself off, looking very stressed. His voice lower than before, he spoke again. “My son seems very interested in you, I wonder what you said to him to achieve that?” The question was clear: why was his son interested in L of all people?

“That, I have no explanation before.” L replied honestly for once. “I don’t think anything I said was particularly persuasive. I also don’t believe I led him to believe I had any…personal interest in him. I inquired about a few points of interest and examined him directly, that’s all.” 

The Chief was silent for a heavy moment. “And did you get whatever it was that you showed up for? Did you achieve what you wanted to achieve?”

Not in the slightest, L thought but would never admit to. 

“Ryuzaki!” Aizawa stepped up to their chairs, loud as always. The other investigators didn’t appreciate being locked out of the investigation room all the time, though they respected that their Chief only wanted him and L to be watching for his family’s privacy, so they obtained permission to be allowed inside to help with the work every so often when both L and the Chief said they could. “Surely by now you can take the surveillance down! You’ve met Light in person, I’m sure you know now that he’s a good boy and wouldn’t have anything to do with Kira! Can’t you put an end to this yet?”

“Aizawa, hey…” Matusda raised his hand to hesitantly try to slow his coworker down, but he was interrupted by their chief. 

“Aizawa, calm yourself. As much as I hate it, I understand that my son is L’s prime suspect at the moment. We’d better help him investigate Light so we can get past this more quickly.” The man in question spoke, stoically. 

Aizawa calmed down instantly at his chief’s reprimand, looking briefly uncomfortable and chagrined. After a few seconds, he was able to aim a more mild glare at L. “Still, we would have more suspects if the case wasn’t solely focused on your family.”

“Aizawa does have a point.” Matsuda called out hesitantly, shooting a nervous glance around the room as he spoke. “Maybe we should investigate other people alongside Light, even if he remains our main suspect…”

“I understand that this must be frustrating for you all,” L chose to answer, not looking away from the screen. “It may seem like I’m lingering too long on Light Yagami, but I need to be thorough about this. I agree that it is taking some time to show results, I will agree to retract the surveillance cameras from the Yagami Household soon if nothing substantial comes from it. Now that I am engaging Light directly, I’ll be able to observe him more often without the cameras. In fact…I intend to invite Light to join our team.” 

“Wait, hold on!” Matsuda jumped up from his spot, nearly running into Watari as the man wheeled a cart of ice cream into the room. The elderly man calmly scooped some matcha ice cream into a cone and handed it to a surprised Matsuda. “Oh…uh, thank you.” The man stuttered as Watari moved on. After a second, Matsuda startled and turned his attention back to L. “Hold on, I’m confused. Does that mean you don’t really suspect Light? If you did, you wouldn’t want him to join the investigation…”

L groaned internally. Matsuda shouldn’t try thinking, he just ends up lost. “The investigation is mostly a formality at this point. Light is almost certainly not Kira, but we must be careful about this, especially if I bring Light into the investigation.” L lied smoothly, deciding that undermining his own level of suspicion towards Light was very much necessary to keep the peace. If one could call this peace, anyway. 

“I guess…” Matsuda said, unsurely. 

This was troublesome. It was unfortunate that Light was the chief’s son, the investigators were allowing their connection to his father to color both their views of Light and their behavior in the investigation, which was irksome. Without that connection they may not have been convinced that Light was connected to Kira, but he doubted they would be pushing so hard to move onto a different suspect. 

They are right about one thing, L begrudgingly allowed. My surveillance of Light has turned up less than nothing, it has done more damage to the investigation than help and a great deal of time has already passed. Still…the idea of conceding to Light by taking down the cameras before I get something substantial grates on me. He grumbled. A decision will need to be made in one direction or another, but what should I do? Am I really willing to risk the likely chance of further harm to the investigation on the off chance that we might witness some heretofore unseen evidence that implies Light is Kira? 

L’s attention was jerked back to the camera footage, by Sayu getting up while gathering her things and declaring she was going. Light’s reply was nearly enough to make L pop forward in his seat in shock. "Alright, see you at dinner! I'm going to go take a shower!"

You’ve got to be kidding me…

~ 🅚 ~

Light was so ready for this. If he hadn’t frightened L off with the goings on during testing day, then he would finally see L again at the ceremony. And he was sure that he could never scare L off, no matter what he did. L was quite simply the only person that Light didn’t think he could drive away and the thought made something warm pool in his stomach. 

He was in the habit of getting ready and leaving early for just about everything, which came in handy that day because his mom insisted on taking pictures of him in his suit before he left for the ceremony. Obviously, he wasn't surprised when he got his acceptance letter and he was just as unsurprised to get an additional letter informing him that he was the freshman representative and would need to make the speech. 

He was also informed that he tied for first place with someone else and that he would be making the speech with them. The other student wasn't named, but they didn't need to be. He was excited to see L again and be close to him. Hopefully they could talk more than they did last time. 

"Looking great, Light-o!" Ryuk flapped behind him as Light walked down his street. 

To-Oh wasn't as close as his high school was, so Light needed to walk to the train and take that to the college. Since the cameras were still up in the house, they had to wait until he was outside and away from most people to have a proper conversation. Not that it stopped Ryuk from constantly holding one-sided conversations with him. 

"Thanks, I wanted to look my best for today." Light grinned. 

"Right! You've gotta make a speech today! Or…" Ryuk teased, playfully. "Are you trying to look your best for something else? Like your future husband maybe?" 

"You know it," Light inclined his head. "I know L probably won't care beyond his profiling, but I want to look my best when he sees me again. Today's going to be a big day." He looked up at the sky with a peaceful expression. 

At the ceremony, Light couldn't find L to sit with him and so he just took a seat near the front. Though he made sure to save the seat next to him. L would probably be running a little late since he didn't really have the regard for punctuality that Light did. But he'd be here. 

"And now for the freshman address. Freshman Representative, Light Yagami." The man behind the podium finally announced after droning on for a considerable time about things he didn't care about. 

"Ryuk, now." Light whispered to the death god sitting right next to him, so quietly it was barely audible. 

"On it!" Ryuk spread his wings and flew off across the room. This was something they'd talked about before the event. In the days leading up, Light had found himself curious about what the views were of him and L among their peers. He didn't particularly care what they thought, but he did think it might be interesting. Maybe there would be something funny. So he asked Ryuk to fly around and listen in for interesting conversations and report them back to him. 

"Here." Light said simply to the room, trying not to run up to the stage. He maintained a leisurely stride, as if he had nothing but time. 

"And Freshman Representative, Hideki Ryuga." The man finished. 

"Here!" L's voice called out in his distinctive monotone, followed by a shuffling sound. Light nearly tripped on the short stairs up to the stage, chancing a look out of the corner of his eye for L. 

"Got a good one here! Two guys chatting it up!" Ryuk yelled across the room, taking advantage of the fact that no one except Light could hear him. 

Light waited by the podium, trying to play it cool, while he waited for L to sidle up. 

"’The student who scores the highest is supposed to give the speech right? I guess they both had to have the highest score’." Ryuk said, echoing one of the guy's words and then moving onto the other. “‘I heard they both had perfect scores in all subjects.’ Hey, he’s sure got your number, huh! Wonder where he got that information from?” Ryuk crowed at him. 

Light allowed the corners of his lips to tug up a little bit at that as he pulled out his written speech and got ready to read from it. Probably a rumor going around started by the child of one of the high-ranking staff members here. It's correct, so it had to come from someone who knew the final grades. 

L came up to stand next to him, but he didn’t spare Light a glance - none that he could see, anyway - and just looked down at the ground. As usual, he was hard to read, but he didn’t seem uneasy standing in front of everyone so Light tried to focus on his speech. Still, he couldn’t help but feel a swell of admiration at how L could stand in front of an auditorium full of people on a formal occasion in a prestigious school and appear completely at ease, even with crazy hair and dressed only in a stark white shirt and old jeans. 

L really is amazing, Light thought with a soft smile as he stared down at his paper without really seeing it. My previous life, all I did was care about how others saw me and here he always was, comfortable being himself no matter what. There aren’t many humans like him. 

“‘It’s hard to believe there are actually people like that.’” Ryuk continued to report on the conversation he was overhearing. Light flawlessly started reading out his speech while listening to Ryuk’s commentary. “Oh ho!” Ryuk’s head swiveled around in a way that would give a human whiplash, glancing a few rows behind him. “Sounds like one of the girls back there likes your man!” 

What did they say? Light looked up for a second, glared intensely at Ryuk, and then in the next, his eyes were back on the paper. He never once stuttered in his words. 

Ryuk cackled. “Okay, okay! I know what you want. One of the girls said something like, ‘I think I like the one on the right’ – that’s L – and her friend looked at her like she was crazy and told her she was weird, pointing out how he’s dressed.” Ryuk snickered again at that part and returned to reporting on the two guy’s conversation.

It’s fine, Light sighed mentally in his head. She can have a crush if that’s what she wants. I can’t fault her taste, but L wouldn’t be interested anyway, so I can tolerate it. Light finished up his part of the speech and listened to both Ryuk and the applause that greeted him at the end of his speech. 

“‘Those two are exact opposites.’” Ryuk switched guys again. “‘Yeah, the tall one looks like a sheltered genius who’s been groomed for success his whole life.’”

WHO’S the sheltered genius?! Light spluttered in his mind, struggling not to glance incredulously at the man next to him. Comments about my childhood aside, I really don’t think I’M the one of the two of us who was groomed for success and sheltered. Light’s lips twitched sporadically as he finally glanced at L and saw him holding his own paper (which was the size of a map ) by two fingers on each of the top corners…it was just adorable.

“‘But the other one…there’s something not right about him.’” Ryuk continued reporting as L started on his part of the speech. “‘He’s just freaking weird . This guy must be what they call a mad genius. Coming to the To-Oh entrance ceremony dressed like that? Unbelievable! Either he’s crazy or he’s just toying with us!’” Ryuk shot a concerned look up at Light who was standing stonily next to L on-stage. “Remember, Light-o, this is their words, not mine!” The Shinigami defended. 

How dare they… Light simmered quietly, somehow managing to keep a lid on his anger. Calling L weird and crazy, he was so close to just calling him a freak! Light knew that was how people would react to L, how they always reacted, but he didn’t like hearing it at all. Even when they were giving L compliments on his obvious intelligence, they couldn’t help but be backhanded about it. 

And again about the clothing… Light glanced again at L as the other man finished up his speech. This was the second time during the ceremony that someone had mentioned L’s clothing choice, which he understood, but… I think he looks nice. 

Everyone clapped politely once more and they could finally leave. Light bowed respectfully out of habit but L didn’t even bother, just scratched his hair and then turned to leave after Light did. He managed to make it a few steps down before L was on him, not as literally as he may have wanted but pretty close. He could almost feel L’s breath on his ear as the man caught up to him from behind and started muttering an achingly familiar set of words. A little off, but not by much. 

“Light? You didn’t tell me your father is Chief Soichiro Yagami of the NPA…” L muttered, lowly. Light didn’t think that was the same as before, but it made sense since they’ve already introduced themselves to each other. Still, it was giving him that weird displaced feeling again.

“Why would I bring it up?” Light shot back casually, his voice just as quiet. Then because he felt like playing ball he added, “How did you know that, anyway?” 

“That’s not all. I’ve heard that your respect for your father is matched only by your strong sense of justice and that you’re planning to join the police force when you graduate.” L stated this all with the heaviness of someone providing damning evidence, and that tone made it hard for Light to not burst out laughing, considering what he was saying. 

Neither L nor anyone else would have any reason to disbelieve those things, but it truly accentuated the fact that he had yet to grasp Light’s true goals or feelings on his life and career. On justice . 

Being unable to read his mind, L continued on, unbothered. “And you’ve already got experience, seeing as you’ve helped the police solve a number of cases in the past. Now you’re showing an interest in the Kira Case.” 

This wasn’t something Light had thought in his past life, but now he had to wonder how L had come by that last piece of information. Most of the info he thrust at Light during this confrontation were closer to objective facts, like who Light’s father was and his career goals. Light’s admiration for his father and sense of justice were more about his personal feelings, but they can be reasonably guessed from his previously stated career goals. His interest in the Kira Case though was a bit weird, because it not only had to do with his feelings and interests but also implied he was doing or saying something to interact with the case more than the average. He was , as Kira, but as Light Yagami, his interactions with the Kira Case were all supposedly incidental. They weren’t, obviously, but L had no proof otherwise. 

I wonder, are you trying to push your feelings about that onto me, L? You don’t think my run-ins with Naomi and the investigators were accidents so you’re trying to indirectly but verbally express that? Maybe to see how I'll react to the hidden accusation? Light peered at him from the corner of his eye as Light sat down in his seat. As expected, L followed him and sat in the empty seat he’d saved. Success! Light fist pumped in his mind. 

“Okayyyy…” Light made a show of confusion. “Are you trying to get me interested? I already am, so where are you going with this?” 

L glanced at him the same way, but his wide-eyed gaze was as intense as ever. “I’m impressed by your abilities and your sense of justice.” You really don’t know anything about what my sense of justice looks like, Light hummed, relaxed. “If you promise not to tell anyone, I have important information concerning the Kira Investigation that I’d like to share with you.

“I won’t tell. Promise!” Light smiled at him, turning to face L fully. He was so ready for this. 

L’s voice dropped to a whisper and he turned to face Light head-on as well, focusing all of his attention squarely, unashamedly on the brunette. "I wanted to tell you that I'm L." This was said as the man stared at him with so much intensity, as if he were trying to see details on the tip of a needle. 

There was so many things that Light could have said at that, so many responses he could give. He could say he knew or pretend to be surprised, but instead what slipped out was:

“I’m a Kira supporter.” 

Chapter Text

For a moment, L heard the echo of a clock ticking in his ears and he forgot how to function. He could only keep staring at Light, as if on auto-pilot. His hand, though, clenched his knee tightly as his mind ran away from him. In this state, he didn't truly pay attention to Light's own surprised expression.

Did he really just say that? Did Light Yagami just admit to supporting Kira, a serial killer ravaging the world? And to someone claiming to be L? 

He couldn't believe what he had just heard. He knew, he knew there was more to Light than the boy wanted people to know, though he couldn't accept that it was something so mundane. Much of the populace did seem to quietly support Kira, much of which was due to Kira's painting themself as heroic , so it wasn't as if Light were unique in that regard. But for Light to so easily break his perfect persona and in front of someone like L who knew his father…what could lead him to make such an admission and to someone like L, of all people?

Was Light serious? Even if he wasn't, to say that…

It was pure madness. Pure madness and yet…

It's a strategic decision, even more advantageous than my own. L thought, coming back to himself little-by-little. Yes…that makes sense. This is very clever of you, Light. 

As he thought this, L began to slowly calm down and he started to get into the right headspace. Analyzing situations and breaking them down always allowed him to feel more in control and detached from what was happening. If he could analyze something, he could come to understand it in time. If he could discover a solution, he could overcome it.

L had admitted to his own identity so that he could accomplish a few things. First and foremost, he wanted to push Light into a corner. No matter what Kira had tried to convince people during that first live broadcast, L knew that Kira had to want him dead. No matter what feelings Light may or may not have for him, he couldn't suffer L to live because as long as L was alive, Light risked capture. And if, against all evidence to the contrary, Light proved not to be Kira and just be a supporter then he should still want L dead to protect his messiah. Quite a few people had already wished for L's death on media platforms in defense of Kira. 

However, Light couldn't successfully kill L if he didn't know his real name so the fact that he knew who L was and his face was supposed to agitate the killer greatly. Being so close to the demise of his enemy and yet so far from it would anger him and that would make him more likely to make mistakes. 

As for the other reason…L had come to the conclusion that Light had some small crush on him despite L's obviously inadequate appearance and manner. Baffling as it might be, Light just didn't seem to care. He'd shown no hesitation in his interest which he had in spite of thinking L was just a regular student. If being anonymous offered no more advantage than being known for who he was, then L would have to choose the advantage of being able to talk to Light directly as L. Especially if it put the boy on edge. It was a calculated decision that was favored by the circumstances. 

But Light's declaration…

You're trying to cover for yourself, aren't you, Light? L peered at him with renewed vigor, having reestablished his equilibrium in this conversation. With Light claiming to be a supporter of Kira, he could argue that numerous oddities in your behavior are down to that. Within reason, if Light appears to show strange behavior regarding Kira in the future, he could argue that that explains it. This especially goes for the circumstantial evidence. Claiming to support Kira may harm his interpersonal relationships, but it's certainly not illegal so it's preferable to being labeled as Kira himself. I believe I have underestimated my opponent…Even so, what a bold declaration.

"I see…" L truly couldn't think of another response to what Light had just said. His mind was whirling with how he could work around this newest obstacle.

"Um…sorry." Light made a show of fidgeting. "I didn't mean to say that, it just slipped out." He looked for all the world as if he were being genuine, but L wasn't about to buy that. 

Sure you didn't. "It's quite alright. I understand that it's not an admission one would want to make to someone they don't know well, but I won't judge you for it." L stated, trying to appear non-judgemental. "But I must admit, I find it very surprising, given who you are." 

"I assume you mean my father?" Light responded, shooting a look at him out of the corner of his eye. 

"Well yes," L admitted easily. "While the children of police officers and government officials are sometimes rebellious in their interests, I didn't take you for the type." He was interested in seeing how Light would respond to that and his eyes bore into his opponent.

"Has anyone ever told you that you have the dead eyes of a shark?" Light asked, smiling brightly at him.

"...excuse me?" L squinted a little at the other man, deeply confused by the newest turn in the conversation. 

"Well, it's just that you're always intensely staring at me without blinking and it reminded me of a shark. There are some other similarities, too." Light rubbed the back of his head with a sheepish smile. 

No, no one had ever told L that. It sounded plausible, however. He'd gotten more glares than he could count and overheard enough slights and insults to have an idea of how he generally appeared to people. However, few people had told him these things directly and precisely none of them had done so without making it into an insult. Certainly not with Light's friendly expression, free of disdain. 

L rarely felt insulted even when he knew it was the intention, but he felt certain – inexplicably so – that insulting him wasn't Light's intention and he didn't know what to do with that. 

"No, I can't say that I've ever been told that." L replied through his confusion. "Thank you for the information."

"You're welcome!" Light said bouncily, but added nothing else.

"I hope it doesn't bother you." L pressed, trying to make sure his eyes bore into Light harder. He wanted to get some kind of reaction out of Light besides happiness, it was becoming something of a strong desire.

"Not at all," He was becoming sure that Light was taunting him with happiness now as he continued to smile at him. "It's unique."

L pressed his thumb to his lip and leaned forward slightly. "Unique?" He repeated, intrigued. 

Light's eyes drifted to L's thumb before going back up to L's eyes. "Yeah. Most people's eyes are really expressive, but I've never been able to read yours. It's like they have no emotions at all, but at the same time, they're so deep…"

"Deep?" L inquired further, feeling more like he didn't understand this conversation the longer it went on. 

"Definitely," Light said, starting to stare right into his eyes. "They look black . Like deep voids, I could just get sucked into them."

For the first time in possibly his entire life, L actually felt the urge to look away. It was an absurd urge that he ignored, but it was there. It was inexplicably hard to face Light when he was like this. He wasn't used to people who were hard to understand. "Well, I'm glad you're not uncomfortable." He didn't mean that in the slightest. L's voice was even more lacking in feeling than normal as he endeavored to reply in this impossible situation. 

Light flashed him a quick smile. "About what you said earlier…" 

"About your father?" L responded. 

"Yeah, but what you said even before that, about my sense of justice." Light suddenly started clapping and L realized the ceremony had completed. The people around them started standing up and getting ready to leave, but Light remained seated, so he did as well. 

"Maybe the reason you didn't take me as the type to be rebellious is because I'm not. Not intentionally, anyway." Light had a small, wistful smile on his face. He gazed straight ahead of himself while not appearing to look at anything, but L's gaze remained on Light's face as the boy explained. "I doubt my dad would be happy to hear my thoughts on Kira, but I'm not being contrary just for the sake of it. It's just that I'm my own person, not an extension of him. He did succeed in instilling me with a sense of justice, like he'd wanted, but I'm afraid it's not identical to his own. Far from it, in fact."

"I see. Yes, I think I'm beginning to see that." L murmured, taking in the slightly melancholic air surrounding the young college student and for the first time, he thought he really did see. In this moment and at least on this topic, L thought he understood.

~ 🅚 ~

"Thanks for inviting me out, Light. You said you knew a good bakery nearby?" L's tone was lighter than normal as he followed Light down the street, away from To-Oh. 

"No problem!" Light smiled. When he'd come back in time, he'd gone in search of good bakeries for when L showed up, the closer to their college, the better. And if he got to slightly impress L by being able to show him establishments that you couldn't find online easily…that was no one's business but his. "I guess by your admission earlier, you're new around here. Have you been to Japan before?"

"You're right, I haven't been in Japan long. I have been here before, but that was a long time ago. A lot has changed in those years." L answered. 

"I suppose you came all the way here for the Kira Case." Light pondered aloud. "The investigation and everything. You did say that Kira was in this region of Japan on that live broadcast." Knowing L would prefer it that way, Light chose not to refer to L as himself while in public and keep his references to the man suitably vague. 

"I suspect you'll need some sort of proof that I am who I say I am." L said instead. 

Light followed behind him. "Actually, it's not necessary. I'm willing to believe you, no evidence required."

L stopped walking at that and Light stopped too, which left him staring at L's back. L stayed still for a minute before looking back at Light over his shoulder. "I find myself a bit confused about the faith you've been showing in me. You could at least entertain the idea that I'm lying to you." He grumbled, sounding almost unhappy about his acceptance. 

Light smiled and started walking again, this time with L following him. "Oh, I'm sure you're lying to me, I'm just reasonably sure that you're also L." He casually admitted.

"And what is it that makes you so sure?" L's response took a moment. 

"There are a few things in particular, but I suppose the main reason I can accept it so easily is because it makes sense." Light mulled it over. "A guy who doesn't seem like he's from around here suddenly shows up. He's clearly intelligent and acts aloof and no one really seems to know him. Finding out you were L…fit. It fit really well."

"Well, I suppose when you put it like that, it does seem like less of a revelation." L sounded a bit put out by that, at least to Light's ears. "How much further is it?" 

In a normal conversation, that question would just have been a curious question, but Light knew L too well. L suspected him of being Kira, had for a while, and was probably wary of wherever Light claimed to be taking him. The two of them, alone…

The thought sent a shiver of excitement down Light's spine, though he suspected L wouldn't share his reaction to the thought. Light really was just taking L to a lovely bakery he'd found, he had no interest in betraying his detective now or in the future. However, L wouldn't be completely convinced until they got there. The Kira that L was suspecting wouldn't want to miss the chance to try and kill L while they were alone, after all, so it only made sense to be wary with what little L knew. 

Luckily for L, the situation wasn't what he thought it was. With Light's superior knowledge and abilities this time, as well as a well-checked ego, if he wanted L dead then he could've had it ages ago. With the names and locations he knew, either he or Ryuk could've bodied L, Watari, all of the investigators, and L's little group of prepubescent successors. In his first life, Light would have arranged it all already with extreme satisfaction and that thought made him wince in discomfort. 

"Not much longer, don't worry." Light cheerily replied. "It's just on the next street!" L spent the next handful of seconds in silence and Light swore L was thinking so hard that equations were floating around in the air. But L didn't make him wait for long to find out what he was thinking of. 

L stopped walking. “Before we go any further, I feel I should tell you that I suspect you, Light Yagami, of not being a mere Kira supporter but of being Kira yourself.” His dark eyes bore into Light, unblinking, and Light stopped walking too.

The comment wasn’t nearly so shocking for him as the first time L had said it, even if it was said earlier than he was supposed to say it. If he remembered correctly, L should’ve said this after they played tennis days later, not on the day of their entrance ceremony. Then again, things were going differently now, including them spending time together after the ceremony which they hadn’t done before. Maybe his behavior was putting pressure on L to act more quickly and bump up the timeline? 

Whatever the reason, Light took a moment to think about how he was going to respond to this one, L watching him all the while. Unlike earlier where his mouth got the best of him and he’d blurted out that line about supporting Kira (not that he minded that when he had time to think about it), he wanted to think this through. L was probably getting frustrated with Light’s lack of reactions to anything he did and this was likely him trying more and more to get a reaction out of him by any means necessary. 

“If you think I’m Kira, then why did you introduce yourself to me?” He asked, tone low. 

“If you knew I was L, why did you admit to supporting a serial killer?” L returned, but didn’t wait for Light to respond before he continued. “I wanted to see you for myself.” 

“And do you like what you see?” Light gave a nervous smile, talking about everything but Kira in that moment. He ignored the other part of his statement.

L hummed. “That remains to be seen. We’ll need to spend more time together before I come to any conclusion.” Light had the strong feeling that L had completely missed the point just now. “But is that really all you have to say about me suspecting you of being a killer?”

Light started to walk again and L slowly started to follow him. “I’m still processing it to be honest, but I suppose I should feel honored that you think I could be Kira. I suppose that must mean you think very highly of me.” 

“...Perhaps.” L offered, hesitantly. 

Just as he'd said earlier, when they turned the corner onto the next street, Light saw it. "There!" He declared, triumphantly. So excited about being able to finally bring L to the place, Light unthinkingly reached out to L and grabbed him by the hand, immediately pulling him towards the storefront. L made a hard-to-describe surprised sound, but Light paid basically no attention as he beelined for the cafe like a torpedo. 

"Uh, Light–" L started.

"We'll be there in a sec." Light said. They crossed the street, Light dragging L and L coming along easily enough. They got to the front door and Light stopped to open it before pulling L inside. The interior was just as he remembered it, classy but simple and dark in design. The floors were gray tile and the walls were covered in some kind of wood paneling. Most of the furniture and seating was made out of a dark wood that the waitress told him was Walnut when he’d asked.

He was happy to see that his usual booth by the window was empty and he tugged L over to it. “Do you mind sitting here?” He called over his shoulder without looking back. 

“...I think this seating will be fine, but…Light, are you holding my hand right now?” L’s voice sounded even more neutral than normal and Light glanced curiously over his shoulder. 

… oh. So he was. 

Light hadn’t fully realized he’d been holding onto his hand this whole time until he’d actually stopped to think about it, not that he was particularly upset by that revelation. He honestly didn’t want to let go now that he knew. Even though L’s hand was a little cold, the parts where their skin was touching felt warm and Light found that he liked the feeling of L’s hand in his. But, he reasoned, this might make L too uncomfortable too quickly. So letting himself enjoy it for a second longer, Light twisted his expression into something sheepish and dropped L’s hand. “Sorry about that, I was just excited!” 

“It’s quite alright.” L responded, nonetheless looking at him oddly. 

“So…let’s sit!” Light exclaimed cheerily and slipped into his own seat at the table. He had to hand it to L, the man didn’t waste time following him in sitting down. L sat on the opposite seat lowering himself into his usual crouched position. 

“So, Hideki. Are you excited to be starting college here? Have you been to college anywhere else?” Light asked, enjoying the pseudo-date they were on. He knew so little about L’s experiences in general, he wanted to know more. Though he knew L would be vague and cagey about it, because of course he would. 

“No, I’ve never attended college.” L admitted easily, probably because Light couldn’t research his identity from records that didn’t exist. “May I ask why you’re still calling me that?”

“What? Hideki? Well, I don’t have anything else to call you and besides, I like that name. And,” Light gave a small, soft smile. “It’s the name you gave me when we first met, so I prefer it.” 

“...I see.” L paused, taking Light in like one would a troublesome puzzle. ”Thank you for bringing me here, Light. I must admit, it’s a lovely cafe.” L endeavored to say, but his gaze remained firmly fixed on Light. 

Light grinned, regardless. “You’re welcome! I knew you’d like this place and just wait until you try the desserts!” 

L once again pressed a thumb to his lip and stared intensely. “I can’t help but wonder what it was about this place that you thought I would like or why you keep talking about this cafe’s sweets.” 

Well now, that was hard to answer. In truth, Light knew that L spent a lot of time in dark rooms, especially with all the lights off. It was almost a habit of his. L hadn’t ever really indicated in any other way that he had any kind of light sensitivity, but he still thought that – given that clear preference for darker spaces – L would appreciate the darkly colored cafe more than the more common bright and peppy ones. Plus, he made sure the place would be relaxed enough that L wouldn’t have to deal with any comments about the way he sat, like with that awful proctor who should’ve had better things to do…

And of course, L’s love of sweets was infamous and it was the first thing he’d looked for when he thought of where to bring L. Light had spent 24 hours a day with L for over two months and he had never seen him eat anything below a certain sugar content. He had to make sure the sweets were good enough for his connoisseur. 

Saying any of that to L was off the table. So… “You seem like a pretty simple guy.” Light said, coming up with stuff on the spot. “I don’t mean that in a bad way, it’s just that you’re not really flashy and you're quiet so I thought someplace dark and relaxed would suit you better! And I think everybody likes sweets.” If L doesn’t believe him when he’s telling the truth, there’s no way that he was gonna buy the load Light was giving him. He wouldn’t come out and say so, though. He’d just continue to suspect him of lying, quietly. 

“I give off that impression?” L asked. 

Light’s eyes drifted slowly over L’s white shirt and jeans. “Immensely.” 

"Well, learn something new every day." L wrote off just as a waitress came by to take their order. 

"I'll have my usual." Light smiled at her and she smiled back. 

"Sure thing, Light." The waitress responded cheerily and turned to L. 

"I recommend the strawberry shortcake." Light encouraged. He knew that L had a special fondness for both cake and strawberries. 

"Yes, that sounds good." L muttered with some surprise and proceeded to order that, as well as several other items off the menu, including a chocolate mousse and a parfait. The waitress's eyes popped open at the amount of sugar this man was prepared to consume, but was a consummate professional and said nothing about it before going back to get their sweets. 

L hummed deeply when he popped the first bite of strawberry shortcake into his mouth. "This is truly delicious, one of the best I've had, in fact. This is a really good place, Light." L commended him again. 

Light glowed with the praise. "Thanks. I really like it here, too." He said, digging into his own dessert; an apple tart. 

If this was the original timeline, I’d be expecting to get hit with a bunch of photographs. Will he try the same thing again? I didn’t leave any messages so he’d have to falsify the photographs and come up with his own message, but he already did that once before… Light pondered, his mind drifting a little. He honestly wasn't sure what he would prefer, but it seemed he was so lost in thought that he missed something that L had just said.

“Could you please say that again?” Light asked, shaking himself.

"As I admitted to you before, I am L." He said, almost like he was trying to remind Light of that fact. "And I am currently working to catch Kira. I have been working closely with a small group of trusted investigators. Among them, your father."

"Well, I suppose that sounds right. I did know he was working on the case." Light responded, trying to look as confused as possible. "But what does that have to do with me?" 

"I didn't show up in front of you for no reason." L stated, continuing to eat. "I have a great respect for your abilities and so I would like to invite you to join us in catching Kira."  

"I think there might be some misunderstanding here." Light informed him, doing his best to keep up the surprised look he was giving the other man. This was the moment he'd been planting seeds, planning for. The moment L asked him to join so he could keep an eye on him. 

"Misunderstanding?" L prodded, glancing back up at him. 

Light leaned forward, earnestly. "I want to make it clear to you that I have no interest at all in joining the Kira investigation." 

"No interest?" L murmured, staring at him. "I had thought you would be interested, given that I've been told you want to be a detective in the future."

"You've been told? By who, my father?" Or was it the surveillance cameras and wiretaps in his bedroom?

"Your father has been most helpful in providing information to clear you." L said, agreeably. 

Ha! You're doing it again, Light scoffed mentally. That statement has two meanings, as usual. On the surface, you're trying to comfort me, but really, you're trying to make yourself appear less antagonistic by implying that you're trying to clear me rather than the reverse. You're not even slightly interested in clearing me, just making it seem like that's your motivation to make me less wary of you. So I'll slip up somewhere.

Light played around with the baked apple he had on his plate. On top of that, you're also planting the idea that my father has been providing you liberally with information, making me wonder just what exactly he's told you. You want me to second guess lying to you too, don't you? Which doesn't matter much, since you'll take anything I say as a lie, anyway. 

He skewered an apple slice and popped it into his mouth. You're quite the man, I'll give you that. 

"Mm! You were right about the cake being good here, Light." L commented, also having another bite of one of his desserts. 

And now he's trying to agitate me by switching the subject to something superfluous, but I can play that. "Right? They're so sweet but they also have so many different flavors going on." Light made a show of savoring a bite of his dessert. "About being a detective in the future…" Light hummed. "I haven't been aiming for that for a while now."

"Is that so? Why the sudden change?" L pressed a thumb to his lips, leaning forward slightly. He was looking at Light like a strange new species of animal. "I take it you haven't told your father."

"No reason, just growing up." Light shrugged. "As for Dad, he's rarely home as it is these days and when he does come home, he just has dinner and goes to sleep, then leaves early the next morning. Sometimes he doesn't even have dinner. So I don't get to talk to him much except for when I drop things off for him at the station. I don't always see him when I do that, but it's the most common time I get to see him these days." He said, playing with the food on his plate, pushing it around. He had no problems talking to L about this even if L tried to use it against him. He felt too comfortable with him to not talk. 

He would take responsibility for some of that. Kira's appearance increased his father's workload quite a bit and he felt a little guilty for it even if it wasn't his intention but more of a by-product. He'd take responsibility for his part in his father not being home, but his father was who he was and that at least Light couldn't control. His job, his position, and his drive were his own. There were other people on the force though and his father had always been a workaholic so they were used to his frequent absences. 

"Besides," Light sighed. "I don't think he'll be happy to hear me say it, he's so proud of me following in his footsteps. Why make one of our few interactions together a negative one?" 

"That makes sense. I imagine you'd want to enjoy the little time you have with your father and not bring up anything unpleasant." L replied, then he cocked his head at him. "Your father is indeed quite proud of you. I understand why you wouldn't want to sacrifice that."

Light allowed a weak smile. "I care about my father, but recently I've been thinking that I need to make my life my own. I can't follow in his footsteps for everything, because I'm not him. So what I'm trying to say is I appreciate your offer and your compliments on my skills, but I don't feel the strong desire to join the Kira Case. I'm sure that with you and my dad working on it, you won't be in desperate need of my help."

L took in his expression as he carefully answered. "I understand your feelings on the matter, even if I do find it surprising. I'd hate to miss out on utilizing your intellect, but if your mind is made up then I suppose I have no choice to accept. Still, would you at least consider coming to our investigation's current location just once to speak to the other investigators? If after meeting the others you still don't want to assist us, I'll fully accept your decision."

The thing was, Light wasn't sure what exactly L was going to do when he decided he was going to play hard-to-get with the invitation. He was certain, both in this and the other life, that L really, really wanted him on the investigation team. It basically meant L could keep an eye on him constantly and actively searching for Kira would put far more pressure on Light.

In his previous life, Light had been pretty anxious to be on the team, too. It brought him closer to the investigation so he could see where it was going and it brought him closer to L, all the easier to try and find out the man's identity. It was one of those unnerving situations where he and L both wanted the same thing. He just wasn't exactly sure what to expect from L if he turned him down and didn't act desperate to prove himself. 

This seemed reasonable, though. L wanted to convince Light to join the investigation despite his hesitance by making him feel pressured by his father and the other investigators, but didn't want it to be obvious that's what he was doing. If Light agreed to go there at least once, it also meant that he was at least a little open to changing his mind about it. In truth, Light wanted nothing more than to be on the team, if only so that he could get more routine access to L. They could spend time together every day again! But he wasn't just going to throw himself at the investigation this time. If L wanted him to join, he'd have to work for it a little first.

"I'm really not sure that's a good idea." Light said, wariness painted across his face. "I don't think I'm going to join and I'm sure the safety of this case relies on secrecy. Someone not involved in the case probably shouldn't be going to your base of operations and seeing the faces of all of the detectives, especially since I'm…" 

"A Kira Supporter." L finished for him. 

"Yeah…" Light responded. "I'll keep your secret about being L, I will, but I don't know how much of a good idea it is for me to get any more involved than I already am." He was really going to make it seem like he doesn't want to join. Besides, he had too much acting talent to waste on a half-effort. 

"That's a risk I'm willing to take." L informed him, but was cut off by his phone ringing. Of course you're willing to, you know I'M Kira and you know I can't risk killing you now that you've introduced yourself only to me, Light thought fondly. 

"Excuse me, I have to take this." He fumbled around in his pocket and just as he started to pull his phone out, Light's own phone rang. 

Light froze, still like a statue, as a memory was violently jarred loose. A memory he was currently living. He'd forgotten about it, especially since there had been no photographic tests this time…Light didn't reach for his phone, too frozen with realization to grab it. 

This didn't stop L if the man noticed his reaction and he answered the phone. "Yeah?" L listened for a second and then his eyes turned shocked and he jerked forward. "Light, it's your father, he's–"

"–had a heart attack." 

~ 🅚 ~

“Please, just go home and get some rest.” Soichiro said to his wife, who until then had been fussing over him in his hospital bed. 

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow. Have the hospital call home if you need me to bring you anything. Light? Don't stay too long and be home soon.” She asked, turning to Light who was sitting at his father’s bedside with L. 

“Of course. Don’t worry, Mom, just go home.” Light said quietly, flashing her a smile. She smiled back and quietly left. 

Light sighed and turned back to his father. “So they think stress was the only cause?” Light asked, already knowing the answer. 

“Yes." Soichiro groaned. “To be honest, I thought it was Kira when I first collapsed.”

“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried it was Kira when I first heard, but it couldn’t be. You’re a police officer and Kira doesn’t kill cops.” Light reached out to the man’s hand laying limp on the bed and squeezed reassuringly. "I feel guilty though."

"Don't be." Soichiro said, ignoring the comment about Kira. ”It seems I’ve been pushing myself a bit too hard lately, but I’ll be fine.” 

“Indeed.” L said tonelessly, stating the facts as they were. “It must have added to your stress knowing that Light is the primary suspect of my investigation.” 

“It's not your fault, either. Me and Mom tried to tell him that the case would be too much for him at his age and dangerous on top of that.” Light informed L, shooting his father a look. 

“Now, Light,” Soichiro sighed heavily. “We’ve been over this. It’s my job and that’s that. I have to do it. I knew it would be dangerous anf I accepted that.” 

“Yeah, yeah, I know…” Light huffed. “Your job, which means you have to do everything for it without fail, even if it sacrifices your health. You accepted it, which means we have to.” 

This must be an argument they’ve had multiple times in the past, L thought while taking in Light’s irritated expression. 

“Light, please.” Soichiro sighed, exhausted. 

“Okay…” Light sighed too and glanced away. "Sorry, I didn't mean to stress you out after all this."

“Thank you for coming.” Soichiro said, looking at L. “I’m sorry for the trouble.” 

“Not at all.” L responded. “I’ve already made my identity clear to Light, he is aware of the situation.” 

“Yeah.” Light turned back and smiled at them a little. “I know that he’s L and that I’m a suspect.” 

L cocked his head as he glanced at the teen, he found his strange reactions to things very confusing. Soichiro Yagami was clearly worried and stressed about Light being under suspicion, but Light himself was completely calm about it. If anything, the boy seemed to find it some kind of amusing. 

“That’s true.” Soichiro acknowledged with a resigned expression and directed his next question to L. “So, Ryuzaki, now that you’ve had the chance to talk more extensively with my son, can he finally be cleared as a suspect?” 

“Ryuzaki?” Light inserted, looking between them in confusion. 

“You know me as Hideki Ryuga,” L decided to answer. “But the pseudonym that the other investigators are calling me is Ryuzaki.”

Light thought about that for a second. “You really have a thing for R names, huh?” Somehow, that wasn’t a response that L had expected, but that was normal when dealing with Light. For some strange reason, the young man never gave an ordinary, expected response to anything that happened. Of all the strange observations to make…

“And as for suspicion, when I say I suspect him, you should know it’s very minor.” Which wasn’t an answer, but L didn’t feel like Soichiro would react well if he told him what he was actually thinking. At this point, L was almost absolutely certain that Light was Kira, regardless of whatever the boy might have claimed about being a follower of Kira. Light Yagami was just too strange and he fit too much to not be Kira, even if so much about him confused L. “We’ve gone over this, but I’ll say it again for Light’s benefit.” 

L turned to look straight at Light as he talked, gazing steadily at his face. He most definitely wanted to see Light’s reaction to this information. “Not long ago, I had the Yagami Household put under surveillance and I specifically had Light watched by one of a few American FBI agents that were sent over here to assist with the case. The agent assigned to Light was Raye Penber, who you’ve both met thanks to the kidnapping issue a while back. This was because we had reason to believe that someone in the police force was connected to Kira and so both them and their families were investigated. I hope you aren’t offended that we did this without your knowledge.” L especially zeroed in on Light’s face when he said the last part. He was challenging Light to get upset or offended, needling him about it, but of course Light refused to react accordingly, as he always did. 

“Of course not!” Light smiled at him. “Why should I be insulted by you daring to do your job? If anything, I commend you for being willing to investigate the families of the people you work with. A lot of people would have let the personal connection stop them from doing what they needed to do.” 

There was absolutely nothing wrong with Light’s reply and it made L frown harder. Light’s response was above reproach and yet, wasn’t that abnormal? Most people in Light’s situation would probably be angry about being watched like that or at least uncomfortable, but Light took it all easily. He didn’t act surprised about anything he’d heard, just accepting it at face value. He should be asking questions…it was very strange that he wasn’t and L didn’t know what to make of it. These small details made him certain that there was more going on here, but how to prove it..?

“Exactly so. I’ve never been interested in letting personal relations get in the way of a case.” L’s eyes bored into his. L wasn’t going to let any personal relationships get in the way of solving the case and catching Kira, his gaze said. He was sure Light was intelligent enough to understand what L was saying without him having to spell it out. L frowned even harder when Light’s smile widened. 

“I find Light’s intelligence impressive.” L told Soichiro, but he still did not look away from Light. “He’s quick-witted and direct, I would like him to assist in the investigation.” 

“Absolutely not! I forbid it!” Soichiro insisted immediately, sitting up halfway in his hospital bed. “I will not have my son get mixed up any further in this madness!” 

“I understand how you feel, but…” L started, but Light cut him off. 

“It’s not like I’m really interested in joining this case anyway, Dad.” Light’s statement caused Soichiro to look at his son in surprise, giving him all of his attention. L stayed silent and watched the two interact. Maybe an opportunity to convince the chief about having Light on the team would appear. “I know that I’m just a college student and that I have no business being involved in a dangerous case, especially such a big one. I don’t see any reason why I shouldn’t leave it to the professionals. Even if you guys haven’t made much progress so far, I have no doubt that you will succeed if you keep working on it.” 

“Light…” Soichiro looked touched. 

“I’ve agreed to go to your current headquarters to see and talk to the other investigators, but after that, I’m sure things will go back to normal. I’ll keep going to school, same as ever. Meeting the other investigators is just a concession I made because L is determined to get me to at least consider the idea.” Light nodded to himself, crossing his arms. 

“You’re taking him to meet the others?” Soichiro asked L. 

“That’s right,” L responded with his mind still dissecting everything Light had just said. “I do truly feel that it would be beneficial to the investigation were Light to join us. I believe his insight and intellect could really help us make some headway in the case. That is why I convinced him to come by our current setup. I’m hoping that seeing what kind of work we do will engage him enough to join.” 

“Ryuzaki, I understand that you only want what’s best for the case, but like Light, I’m not sure how comfortable I am with him taking part in this. It’s a dangerous case and he’s my son.” The man said steadily, looking right at him as he spoke. 

“I understand.” L said and allowed the statement to be on its own for a moment. 

And he did understand. The Kira Case was extremely dangerous and each and every person who worked to catch Kira were in mortal danger. In the end, they all risked suffering a painful death. All of those currently involved in the investigation, from Chief Yagami to Naomi Misora, were adults who had already been in careers that came with a distinct amount of danger, but Light was different. 

While now 18 years old, he would not be a legal adult until he was 20. On top of that, he was a college student rather than a seasoned officer or agent who was used to danger and no amount of slight assistance on previous cases would change that. On top of that, knowing that Light was also a suspect (even if L lied about just how suspicious he was) would make him wary about having Light be anywhere near him, as well as…

"You should go home now, Light. I'm being well looked after now and you need your sleep, it's already getting late." Soichiro insisted. 

"Fine." Light acquiesced. "You rest up too, okay? Job or no job, I better not hear about you collapsing again, Dad, okay?"

"Alright, Light." Soichiro said softly, smiling for the first time since the conversation had started. Light reached out and squeezed his father's hand once more before glancing at L with a smile and leaving. 

"I do apologize for the stress my suspicions have caused you." L said, once Light was out of the room. As he said this, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and sent a text to Watari to have him pick him up out front. 

"It's alright, you're only doing your job. It's just that Light is my son…" Soichiro sighed, clearly tired. 

"I'll let you get some rest." L said, climbing out of his chair. As he approached the door, he called out one more thing before leaving. "Please recover fully before rejoining the investigation." He eased the door closed and headed down the hallway towards the front entrance. 

L paused just outside when he saw Light sitting on a bench and not in the process of walking home. "Light? Is there any reason why you're still here?" L pried. 

"Just getting my thoughts in order before I go home." Light said softly with a slightly faraway expression. 

"Might I ask what's bothering you, in particular?" L asked. 

Light hummed. "You probably noticed back there, but I'm a little upset with the situation and not just because my dad's in the hospital."

"I did, actually." L acknowledged. "I take it you're upset that he didn't listen to you and your family about quitting the case?"

"Yes and no." Light shook his head. "I just…it really annoys me when he exhausts himself because he can't balance work life and home life. Taking a break, getting some sleep, maybe watching an episode of a TV show…it's like none of that exists between when a case opens and when it closes. It's completely, 100% imbalanced and unhealthy but try telling him that…and then me and mom have to deal with the consequences of his poor habits. And I feel guilty on top of it because I can't help and whenever I cause problems for him, it only makes the situation worse but despite what he thinks, I can't be on my best behavior for the rest of my life ." He sighed, deeply. 

L…couldn't understand why Light was confiding in him right now, because that's what this was. Unless all of it was fabricated to an intense degree, Light was being more honest with him in this moment than he was with his own father. Why in the world would he feel comfortable enough to do that? Though L had decided to befriend Light in order to get the young man to let his guard down, he didn’t feel like he’d earned this. Light hasn’t known him for that long…could it be his crush on L that made him more open? L honestly didn’t know how to respond. “He is a very commendable officer, though.” 

“Hideki,” Light sighed. “Imagine if you were in my position. How would it feel if one of your parents took responsibility for your family’s successes but not their failures. If you were the one who had to help take care of the family and look after most of the stuff while someone who doesn’t gets to stand apart from it all and take credit for the success of the family unit? And then add the fact that you do actually care about the person you're frustrated with?” 

L took a moment to think about that. “I imagine…it would be the worst feeling in the world.” If he was neither paid for nor given credit for the cases he closed, he knew that he would be reluctant to engage in cases again in the future. In that way, he did give Light credit for still putting in an effort to uphold his family’s image. 

Light's lips quirked up. "Just so. Well, I better head home. Dad was right that it's getting late, wouldn't want to risk running into any unsavory characters after dark." He said as he stood up. 

"There's less to be worried about with Kira patrolling the streets." L couldn't help commenting, taking in Light's features in the setting sun. 

Light paused for a minute and then, "Right." He smirked over his shoulder, looking right back at L. His golden eyes glinted teasingly in the low light. "So when do you think I should meet the other investigators?" Just then, Watari pulled up in the limousine. 

"Does tomorrow sound good for you?" L asked, stepping up to the car. Light didn't follow him. 

"Tomorrow's Saturday, so it should be fine. I don't have anything planned." Light nodded. 

"Alright," L turned around to face him again. "If you want, you or your father can give me your phone number and we'll call you with the details on where to meet up." Acting as if he didn't already have Light's number. That kind of knowledge normally put people on edge, although Light was exceptionally strange in his reactions.

"Actually…" Light's hesitant and nervous tone gained his attention immediately. It was the first time L had heard him like that. "Do you think you could pick me up instead? I’ll still give you my number, though!” 

“I don’t think that’s necessary.” L responded slowly. “The hotel is close enough to your house for you to walk.” 

“You want the place you’re staying to be secret, right? Don’t want Kira to find it…and I could easily be followed, it happened once before,” At this, Light gave L a look . “It’d be safer if you picked me up, like you did for Ms. Misora.”

With Light bringing up that they had done the same thing for Naomi Misora, it was difficult for L to further insist that Light was fine walking. If Soichiro wasn’t in the hospital, he could have Light be driven to the hotel by his father, but that was not the case. L mentally shuffled through whether or not he could propose one of the other investigators bringing Light in, but quickly came to the conclusion that they would all question why Watari wasn’t doing it, since that’s how it normally went. Besides, L was under no responsibility to go with Watari to Light’s house, so he agreed and was met with Light’s wide grin and excited energy. 

“Great! I’ll see you then! Wait a sec, I’ll give you my phone number, you can call or text me anytime!” Light made the offer as he rooted around in his pocket. “I think I have a piece of paper and pencil…” 

“Just tell me.” L said as he turned back to the car and pulled the rear door open, somehow exhausted all of a sudden. Light rattled off the number and, true to his word, L committed it to memory. He got in the back and closed the door, but then he rolled down the window so he could talk a little more. “See you tomorrow, Light.” He called out. 

“See you tomorrow, Hideki.” Light smiled softly and backed up so the car could pull out and he could start his somewhat short walk home. 

Through the rear window, he could've sworn he saw Light do a fist pump. 

What had he just agreed to?

Chapter Text

Light was waiting excitedly the next morning for L to send Watari to pick him up. I wonder if L will be with him? His leg bounced excitedly as he sat on the living room couch. His mom had asked him what he was doing earlier when he first sat down and started waiting, and he'd told her that he was going out with a friend for a while and that they were gonna come by the house. 

She'd been a little surprised by that, but it wasn't the first time people from Light's school had come to visit, so she quickly shook it off. Apparently, she was doing some grocery shopping that day so she left soon afterwards, saying she would be gone for a while. That left him and Sayu. Sayu usually spent her weekends either hanging around the house having fun or going out with her friends. It seemed like this was the former, because she swept down the stairs just as their mother was leaving. 

“What are you up to, Light?” She exclaimed when she saw him, flopping onto the couch beside him. “I don’t usually see you up this early on a Saturday!” 

“Oh, morning. Yeah, I like to sleep in on the weekend.” Light acknowledged her with a smile. “I actually have plans today so I had to get up early.”

“Plans?” Sayu sat up a little more. As usual, she was very interested in what other people were doing. “You don’t have plans on the weekend too often, here and there…” She said, leadingly. Subtly wasn’t her strong suit and it was apparent that she wanted him to tell her more. Light obliged. 

“A friend wants to take me somewhere.” Light wasn’t sure how to put it without telling her too much, like that the friend was L or that he was trying to get him to join the Kira case, so he settled on that. 

“A friend?” Sayu’s whole body jerked at that word and he couldn’t honestly blame her. Ever since he got into high school, he didn’t really do friends. “The only person you’ve talked about being a friend lately is…oh! Don’t tell me that Ryuga guy is taking you out?!” She burst out, surprisingly perceptive. 

“Uh…well, it’s not exactly like he’s taking me out today, but we did go on a date yesterday.” Light said slowly, thinking it over. 

“You say he’s not taking you out but he’s taking you somewhere? That sounds like it to me!” Sayu insisted, very excited. 

Hard to argue with logic like that, Light thought. “I guess so…actually, he’s coming to pick me up today or at least he’ll send someone to do it…” Sayu always had such crazy energy that it could feel overwhelming at times, where did she get it from? 

“Wait, he’s picking you up?! ” If possible, Sayu got even more excited at hearing this information. 

“I did say he might just send someone…” Light wryly tried to correct her, but Sayu would not be deterred. 

“I’m sure he’ll come himself if he agreed to it.” Sayu dismissed, a huge grin on her face. “Honestly, Light, you really move fast! You never brought anyone home before, so I didn’t think you had it in you! You haven’t even started classes yet and you two are already going on outings together. You’ll get married within the year at this rate.” Light watched his sister’s tirade in amusement, all the while wishing that wooing L could be that easy. But L never made anything easy, sadly. 

“I think I’m going to have to disappoint you on the date of our wedding.” Light couldn’t help but laugh. “But I’ll see what I can do about getting you a brother-in-law.” 

“See that you do.” Sayu gave him a mock-serious nod. Her expression shifted a little as something clearly occurred to her. “Does Mom and Dad know about Ryuga?” 

The mental image of their father sitting next to L and watching the security cameras in their house flashed across Light's mind. "If they know, I didn't tell them." He responded, thoughtfully. 

Sayu turned this over in her mind. "Is it a secret? Do you mind them knowing?" 

Light felt a little warm at the thoughtful question. When was the last time he could remember a member of his family specifically asking what he wanted? That was kinda sad, actually. Light shook the thought away and smiled at his sister. "I'm not worried about what they think about it, I don't care. It might be annoying if they know but that's about it." He shrugged. 

Sayu seemed to take that in before giving him a bright smile. "Well then, I'll leave it for you to tell them, then! I won't bring it up around Mom."

"Thanks, Sayu." Light responded, just as he caught a glimpse of a dark car pulling up outside of their house. It looked like a limosine but shorter than they usually were. "I think my ride's here." 

Sayu looked where he was looking and her hands flew up to cover her mouth. "Oh! That's a really expensive looking car, Light! Does your Ryuga have money?" 

Light glanced at it again. It was a nice car. While not a full limo, it definitely looked pricey even without him knowing anything about cars. As for L's finances, she hadn't the faintest idea. "Well, I did have my suspicions. This just aligns with them." He answered her, carelessly. 

Sayu let out a long whistle. "Are you sure he isn't the actual Hideki Ryuga?" 

"I'm sure," Light laughed. "I'll get you to meet him soon."

Strangely enough, Light actually felt at peace in this moment. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d just had fun chatting with family, if he ever had. He talked with his sister, his mom, his dad…but this felt different. This wasn’t about niceties or taking stock of what’s happening…he actually couldn’t say what it was about but it felt less weighty with expectations. Lighter than usual. 

He didn’t feel like he needed to give any specific answer to make someone happy or satisfy their expectations. 

"Awesome!" She burst out, looking truly excited at the prospect. "If you really like him, don't let him get away, Light! It looks like he's a keeper." She said, craning her neck to get an even better look at the vehicle. 

Light chuckled as he got up and headed for the front door. "Oh, I won't." Not a chance of it. 

"Good luck, Light!" She called out loudly to him and he waved over his shoulder as he closed the door behind him. 

As Light made the short walk from his front door to the car, Watari got out of the front seat and languidly moved to one of the rear doors, signaling to him where he was supposed to go. Watari was wearing a hat that hung slightly over his eyes, but he was still easily recognizable. Light smiled at the elderly man as he approached the door he was standing next to, to which Watari silently nodded in greeting. 

Light was thinking about whether he should verbally greet the man since they hadn't met in this timeline as Watari opened the door for him, letting Light get his first glimpse inside since the windows were tinted. Those thoughts stopped when he saw who was waiting quietly inside. 

"Hello, Light. Good morning." Was L's monotone greeting, the man looking more relaxed than the previous day. 

"Morning, Hideki." Light's smile was relieved as he hastened to slip into the back seat. Watari cleanly closed the door and doubled back to the driver's side. "I wasn't sure that you would come yourself."

L hummed. "I wasn't sure that I would come, either. However, it isn't a difficult thing to do. Are you happy?" 

"Very!" Light agreed, easily. "I'm glad you came." L's brows furrowed in what Light thought was confusion but why L was confused by his statement, Light didn't know. Watari started the car and they pulled out into the street. 

"So where are we going?" Light asked, mostly just making conversation. He didn't really care where they were going. 

"For the moment, the investigation is taking place in various hotels. We move every few days for protection." L said, sitting in his usual hunched position. 

For the moment, huh? Light recited. Could L be hinting at the eventual reveal that he was currently working on a massive headquarters for the Kira Investigation? Complete with helicopter pads! According to L, the construction was started the moment he decided to work on catching Kira. 

L really shines when it comes to thinking ahead, Light couldn't help the feeling of awe that overtook him when he thought about it. He was sure that there was no one alive that could hold a candle to L when it came to preplanning, even Light himself. To start the construction of an entire skyscraper before even starting the investigation! 

"Light?" L's voice knocked Light out of his musings and he quickly turned back to the man in question. 

"Yes?"

"You were zoning out, Light." L observed. "Something wrong?"

"No, no," Light shook his head. "Just thinking about some things. A lot of stuff has been happening lately." 

"Understandable." L noted, watching him as always. 

The rest of the relatively short drive was spent with Light feeling both stiff and excited. He'd spent so much time with L in the past, but the combination of how much time had passed since then and Light's feelings for him sometimes made him feel a confusing mix of nervous energy. And there was something strangely intimate-feeling about sitting close with L in the back of a car, just the two of them in this small space. 

Light managed to keep his calm until they got to the latest hotel. He wasn’t surprised that this place was different from the one he’d delivered Naomi to. Light followed L out into the hotel and into the elevator. 

L’s bravery or maybe his dedication really did strike him as impressive. To take someone that he genuinely believed was Kira and who he thought really wanted to kill him into his current headquarters. He knew L wasn’t stupid or crazy, so he had to conclude that he was simply just that willing to take risks to see results and an end to the case. It was very worthy of praise, but L wouldn’t take it as such if it came from Light. He’d be more likely to take it as a veiled threat…

“We’re here.” L said, as they both stepped out of the elevator. He immediately started walking down the hall and Light followed after him. 

Light glanced around in interest. “Did you rent out the entire floor?” 

“Don’t be ridiculous, Light.” L responded, a bit of levity to his tone. “I rented out this floor, the one above, and the one below.” Was L trying to joke with him? 

“Right.” Light smiled, wryly. “How absolutely silly of me.” 

“Here.” L said, simply. He stopped at a particular door and opened it. 

Light recognized the usual set-up. Several more TVs than usual, a coffee table with several chairs arranged around it, and a clutter of paperwork dumped on the table. He recognized the people in this room as easily as he recognized his own family members. They were the people he’d worked with (and fought against) for years and they were some of the last people he saw before he died. 

The room was quiet. Aizawa looked deep in thought, seemingly deeply contemplating something. Matsuda, the dedicated man that Light knew him to be, was pouring over a small stack of documents in his hands. Mogi was listening to Naomi whispering about something, which she did with a serious expression on her face. Light froze when his eyes landed on Ukita. 

Ukita…he hadn’t thought hard about what would happen if he saw him. He hadn’t seen the man in a long time or even known him that long. The officer hadn’t died long after Light had tentatively joined the investigation the first time. Unlike in the past, when he was just irritated by what was happening, he genuinely mourned the death of the man he’d never gotten to know. Light hadn’t wanted the man to die in either life. From what he remembered and had observed, the man was friendly and determined. He’d been the first one to rush in to stop the broadcast by the Second Kira, which took guts. So he felt…weird seeing him. He hadn’t killed him and he hadn’t really known him, but he felt guilt all the same for how the man had ended up. The man looked up and smiled at him.

“Light?” 

Light flinched and his head jerked to the side to see who was talking to him. It was L, still hunched right beside him, but looking at Light with a strange expression. “Uh, yeah?” Light asked, feeling breathless. 

“Just wondering where Light went off to.” L answered, curiosity swimming in his dark eyes. 

How long was I zoning out? Light wondered but quickly shook the thought from his head. If there was one thing he was good at, it was pretending everything was fine! “Sorry about that, I’m fine. Just feels weird being here, you know?” 

L hummed but didn’t respond to the question. “Everyone, please welcome Light Yagami.” L announced without raising his voice, but nonetheless getting the attention of everyone in the room. Most of those there hadn’t realized that Light and L were there and they all looked up from what they were doing, directing their attention towards the doorway. 

“Light, welcome!” Naomi was the first to greet him, getting up from her spot to come over to him. Most of the others followed at a more sedate pace. 

“Nice to see you as well, Ms. Misora.” Light smiled brightly at her, reaching out to shake her hand. 

“Oh, enough of that! Please call me Naomi, after everything you’ve done for me and Raye.” She insisted as she shook his hand. 

“I really didn’t do much.” Light said, going for modesty. “I just gave advice, but that’s it. The rest, the police did.” Which was both true and not. 

Light really had just profiled the kidnapper’s personality and thought up a way to tease them or someone else who knew something out. It wasn’t like he and Ryuk had staged a daring rescue or anything, the police had really taken the ball he’d tossed them. Then again, he was also pretty sure that L would still be chasing him down as a suspect for the incident if he and Naomi hadn’t pushed the issue. The whole thing really was just a big mess and he was still a little shocked by the events. But he was very happy for Naomi, she deserved it after everything he’d put her through before and Raye too. 

He hoped they could be happy together since it really did seem like they cared about each other. In his mind’s eye, he saw Naomi asserting that she had nothing else to live for after losing her fiance and Raye, before his death, being willing to do anything he said once Light threatened Naomi’s life. At the same time, he remembered some of the things Naomi had said to him while Raye was missing and knew that there were some issues in their relationship that needed to be addressed if they were really going to be happy - Kira or no Kira. 

“Don’t say that. Even Raye agrees that it was your intervention that saved him.” Naomi informed him, gazing at Light with the softest look. “We’re truly grateful.” 

Light felt a burst of warmth in his chest as she looked at him like that. He didn’t…he didn’t get thanks like this often. Even when he grew into an adult and took up the moniker of L, he didn’t get much praise or thanks for doing the job. But then again, none of them were exactly lauded for it, were they? 

It wasn’t just that. Even though they met a while ago, it wasn’t as if they’d had a lot of time to talk to each other. All the same, he felt a strange friendship between them. Maybe it wasn’t strange for her, but with his memories of his past life and everything he’d done and being Kira on top of it…it was strange. She was fun to talk to, intelligent and kind hearted, and he felt warmth towards her when he saw her. A strange fondness that wasn’t there before and seeing the way she interacted with and looked at him, he felt that she was fond of him, as well. It was…nice to have a friend like that. “You’re welcome, then. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to help you.” Naomi smiled brightly in response. 

The other investigators gathered in a loose, wide circle around Light, every one taking turns reaching out to shake his hand and offer him a short but genuine greeting. Each told him how pleased they were that he was there. Finally, the person he had been most wishing to see approached him, with far more excitement than any of the others. 

“Hi, Light! It’s a pleasure to meet you!” Matsuda came up to them and gave a huge smile. Light felt his own smile grow larger in response, as if it were contagious. 

Hey, Matsu, Light thought. Here he was, the person Light most looked forward to seeing.

“My name is Touta Matsuda, I work under your father! Well, I mean-we all work under him, but he’s been mentoring me.” Matsuda rubbed the back of his head, sheepishly. “He’s told me a lot about you. I’ve been anxious to meet you for a long time now!” 

Light nearly burst out laughing at the older man’s exuberance. It really had been too long! He caught Aizawa side-eyeing Matsuda in annoyance, but Light himself gave him the most welcoming smile he had. “It’s great to meet you too, Mr. Matsuda! If you’re working closely with my dad, then you must really be something special.” Which was true. Whatever incompetencies Matsuda may or may not have, his father must have seen something significant in him to bring him everywhere he went in the course of his work and take the man under his wing and Light didn’t need to guess to know what that was. 

Matsuda made up for his lack of deductive skill with determination and loyalty. And, while Light couldn’t know for sure without checking with his father, he also thought the man highly prized Matsuda’s propensity towards being honest and saying the things that everyone was thinking but no one was willing to verbalize. Light had noticed that a lot while working with the group and so he’s pretty sure his father did too. Most people didn’t seem to appreciate that quality of his, but he knew his dad well enough to know that he would. 

Matsuda’s reaction to his words was immediate. “Oh, I’m not really!” He was quick to wave off in a panic. And then came the reverence and respect for Light’s father that the man wore on his sleeve. “I’m just lucky enough to learn from such a great man as your father! I hope I can learn as much as I can from him!”

Light was getting that same feeling that he got when he heard Naomi talking about her life, that itch to get involved and give some of his advice. Like then, he just felt like he couldn’t let it rest. And well, how often did he really hold himself back from doing what he felt like? 

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to disagree.” Light shook his head playfully. “You must be something special if my father has taken such an interest in you, especially because you’re probably new to the force. If you don’t think so, then that just means you haven’t realized your true potential yet!” 

Matsuda was looking at him in awe now, looking both relieved and touched by Light’s gushing. Well, just wait! I’m only getting started, Light mentally promised him. 

“Wait, how did you know he was new?” Naomi asked, showing curiosity rather than suspicion. 

“Since I’ve worked with the NPD in the past on cases, I would’ve met him before if he hadn’t joined in the last couple years, which is the last time I’ve worked on a case.” Light informed her, nodding at the other investigators in the room. “Everyone else here, I’ve met at least once. It’s a pleasure to see you all again.” 

“Oh! I see now why L was so interested in having you join the investigation!” Matsuda smiled widely, soothing Light’s being with its presence. “You’re very observant, I didn’t even think of that.” He put his hand on the back of his head and closed his eyes as he said this. Light got the distinct impression he was feeling bad about himself. 

“Just because you didn’t think of it doesn’t mean you aren’t intelligent.” Light commented, walking past him and wandering around the room. 

“Oh, well, I’m not really so good at making deductions…” Matsuda tried to let him down. “I don’t know if I’ll actually be able to help the investigation that much.” 

“Of course you will!” Light declared loudly, causing several people to startle and look for him. “I can tell already, just by seeing you. You’re a dedicated and persevering person, it’s written all over your face. Someone like that would be an asset to any investigation, deductive ability or no.” 

“I…” At this Matsuda looked shocked, as if he didn’t know what to say, and he wasn’t the only one. The room in general looked surprised at Light’s pronouncement. 

I can understand why. Light thought, glancing quickly about the room in mild disinterest. That was a very forceful way of saying it. And maybe some of their surprise is that they expected me to ignore Matsu for the most part. 

Most of the investigators wore their shock openly, but L, who still stood nearby the door, was peering at him speculatively. It was hard to tell exactly what he was feeling, but he probably didn’t know what to make of Light’s behavior, either. 

“I…thank you, Light.” Matsuda managed, flushing a little with the praise. He started to look like he was getting a fire lit under him. “I’ll do my best not to let you down!” 

“You won’t.” Light smiled, his voice carrying with it a calm certainty. Then he deflected. “So what were you guys planning to do for the investigation this morning? Please, don’t let me distract you from it.”

“We honestly weren’t planning anything big.” Aizawa informed him, friendly in a way that Light had become unused to seeing in their last couple years working together. “Our investigation has reached a standstill and we’re currently looking into alternative suspects.” 

“You mean, people besides myself?” Light asked blithely, merely smiling at him. 

“Ah, well, about that…” Aizawa responded in surprise, not seeming to know what to say to Light. He glanced in annoyance out of the corner of his eye in L’s direction. Or maybe the emotion was detestation. 

“It’s okay, I’m just joking. I know I’m a suspect, but I’m not upset about it. You’re just doing your jobs and I’m sure L has a good reason for any of his suspicions.” Light inserted. Aizawa relaxed at that and gave Light an admiring look. 

“It’s okay, Light!” Matsuda burst out, taking several steps closer. “No one here really believes that you’re Kira! We all believe in you and so does your father!” He asserted, heatedly. The others around the room either nodded or gave their verbal agreement and they looked like they meant it.

Interesting… Light contemplated. This IS what I wanted, but I would’ve thought that my confession of being a Kira supporter would trouble them a bit, make them more unsure of my innocence until I could cajole them. Unless…did L not tell them about that? 

Light chanced a glance at L, who was still observing the room at large. Then their eyes met, L’s dark black voids against Light’s bright golden orbs, and their gazes stayed connected. 

He really didn't, did he? Light wondered in amazement. Is he holding onto it for a better time to make the information known? When it can do more damage, maybe? Or is it just part of the countless bits of information L has decided to keep to himself and not let the other investigators know about? Lone wolfing it again, L? 

After the moment passed, Light returned his attention to the situation at hand. “Thanks, Mr. Matsuda,” Light held up his hands and gave the man a thankful smile. “But I’m really alright. I definitely don’t mind, so don’t worry about it.” 

“That’s good to hear, Light.” Aizawa commended him. “You’re just as mature as ever. Anyhow, like I said, we’re not doing much. Just looking over profiles, both for civilians and police officers, and discussing their qualities that may or may not align with what we think Kira’s are.”

Light smiled at the man on the outside, but on the inside, his mind was turning that over furiously. Is L giving them busy work? I suppose that I don’t know that’s what it is, but he’s convinced I’m Kira. I’ve known him a long time, he hyperfocuses when he believes something to be the truth and ignores other routes. I have a hard time believing that he would be actively investigating other suspects after he truly set his sights on me. Maybe he assigned this to the investigators because they were pressuring him to look elsewhere for a suspect. Or maybe it wasn’t even L’s idea and the investigators are taking it upon themselves to supply him with another suspect…

“Well then, since I’m here for the morning, mind if I help you with that?” Light asked. In any other investigation, that would be a huge conflict of interest that wouldn’t be allowed. The prime suspect in an investigation helping point out other suspects in said investigation?? Nothing about L’s investigation was above board, was it? 

“That’d be great! You’d be a really big help.” Matsuda said, excitedly. 

“We need all the help we can get.” Aizawa smiled. 

“Great!” Light scooted over to one of the seats and calmly started rifling through the mass of papers on the table.

“I’m afraid this might prove somewhat boring for you, Light.” L piped up for the first time since they’d entered the room, walking towards the group and squatting in his usual way on the only rolling chair in the room. Probably his designated chair. 

"I don't think anything you can throw at me will be as boring as I find school to be." Light said, good-naturedly. 

Most of these profiles are of younger people, Light observed. He decided to quickly look over as many profiles as he could reach and look for common threads between them. After all, these individuals had to be picked for a reason, even if there were quite a few of them. 

L gave an acknowledging hum in response to what he said and settled down to stare at Light as he filtered through the profiles. He watched Light with his usual intensity, apparently deciding that further explanations weren't necessary.

Interestingly, there seemed to be very little tying these individuals together, which might've been expected of such a large group. Still, Light found it difficult to find anything common between them besides their ages, which ranged from their early teens to mid-twenties. 

There were several members of the police among the profiles. Light hadn't at all been expecting that, but it made sense to him. L had always been suspicious and secretive towards the Japanese police at large, but with Light's having used Ryuk to plant a Kira pin in the police station, he's given L a much more tangible reason to think Kira might either be one of them or working with an officer, at least. 

And , Light thought, reaching back in his thoughts to previous interactions they've had. My stunt with Mr. Tailor might have accomplished the same thing. He didn't think it would be overthinking to suspect that the inside knowledge he displayed on who Tailor was, limited though it was, and L's entire plan with him would arouse L's suspicions towards Kira's access to the police. 

Light didn't know how many people in the police were ever in on that particular plan, but the point was that no one outside of the police and L himself would probably have been aware of it and yet Kira had known. And who knows if anything else Light or Kira had done or said would have reinforced that link to insider information that he just didn't know about because for all his power, he couldn't see inside L's head? 

So in short, Light could understand why a number of officers, both high and lower ranking, were in attendance on the table. L probably still had much to make sense of regarding what Kira did and did not know. Most of the other profiles were students, though. And that caused Light some confusion, as well. They ranged from middle school to college age and looked much like a mishmash.

Suddenly, something came to mind. In his previous life, Light recalled hacking into the police database and reading that L suspected Kira of being a student. Once the thought made itself known, he couldn't refrain from quickly flicking through all of the papers again and looking at them from that point of view. If L came to that suspicion this time as well, then that might explain some things. 

Almost as if he'd read Light's mind, L chose that moment to speak again. "Have you noticed something, Light?"

Light weighed whether or not to answer, then shrugged. "Most of these suspects are really young and I was wondering why. And…most of them are grade school or college students."

"Wow, Light, you noticed that fast." Matsuda complimented him. Light beamed at him, causing the man to blush. 

"Indeed." L said quietly, taking Light in with his usual unreadable expression. "You came to that conclusion very quickly and you are correct. You see, I've suspected Kira of being a student for some time now although there is a possibility that he is a young adult working in the police force." 

The last part caused more than a few irritated looks at L from some of the other investigators. Loyalty between police officers was both common and strong even when they hadn't worked closely together, Light knew. It was probably causing some contention with some of them that L thought Kira might be police, even if he wasn't suspecting them specifically. 

“Why exactly do you suspect Kira of being a student?” Light inquired. 

“The young tend to be the most idealistic,” L started, calmly. “While I have no concrete evidence that they are young, I believe Kira’s actions to be a twisted version of idealism and older children to younger adults tend to suit that role. However, because of some of Kira’s suspect knowledge and because police officers could also fill that idealistic role, I’ve included a few of them that could neither be cleared nor discarded for other reasons.” He explained. 

Light hummed. That reasoning was different than what he’d told him in the past timeline, but he decided that it made sense. He didn’t kill on a distinctive schedule anymore, both by nature and by design. He knew that it was the schedule in his past life that made him so predictable in his kills and therefore more suspect, but it was also just nearly impossible to write new names in that way. Before, he could spend a lazy evening at home watching the news and writing a litany of names…but that wasn’t how he did things now.

Now, he investigated each person separately and as a result, he couldn’t just bang out a bunch of names on his off hours. The fact that Ryuk helped with lots of the investigations by spying on people who couldn’t see him, often during school hours, also meant that research didn’t observe strict hours based on his own availability. 

Plus, his stunt with Taylor probably threw L for a loop. In his last lifetime, there was no way Light could have found that information unless he was involved in L’s plan or the arrest of Taylor, so of course he was reluctantly broadening his view of who could be Kira. Still…

Oh, L. Light secretly smiled. If push comes to shove, how are you going to explain how I had access to that information if you try to pin be with being Kira? 

Light nodded but chose not to respond to L’s theories. Instead, he turned back to Matsuda and started chatting with him again. He didn’t pay much attention to it, but he did catch the other investigators still looking surprised at how close he was sitting to Matsuda and how much they were talking. L, too, was peering at him in suspicion and curiosity. 

The majority of the morning went by like that, with Light drinking up whatever information the group yielded and cozying up to his old friend. It was great to be with Matsuda again and seeing him so young…especially because the man really needed some appreciation. At some point, Aizawa tried to admonish Matsuda by telling him he shouldn’t talk Light’s ear off when he got excited about something, but Light politely told him where to go and then turned back to Matsuda, gently urging him to continue. 

At another point, Matsuda got antsy and asked L for something he could do and L disinterestedly directed him towards a small kitchen area where he could get him a drink. Matsuda looked disappointed but did leave to get it, coming back with two drinks. "I thought you might like one, too." Matsuda said, setting the second cup of coffee down in front of Light.

Light's face brightened up considerably from the thoughtful frown it had been stuck in. "Thank you. That's very thoughtful of you." He said, warmly.

Matsuda's cheeks colored brightly at the compliment. “Really, it was nothing special. Anyone could have done it.” 

“But not everyone did and I appreciate it.” Light insisted, not letting him look down on himself even a little. “And you thought about what I would like, that’s so sweet!” He gushed, only making the other man’s face go more red as he fidgeted in delighted nervousness. 

The morning passed pleasantly because of that and when it came closer to noon, Light reluctantly decided that it was time for him to go. No, he told L and the other investigators when they asked, he wasn’t interested in joining them on the case now. He maintained utmost politeness, but the rejection was clear and taking L’s offer to have Watari drive him home, he left the room. He knew it wouldn’t end like this, hoped it wouldn’t end like this, but he couldn’t help but worry that his rejection was too firm. 

But it was L he was dealing with. He shouldn’t have been worried. 

~ 🅚 ~

This was getting frustratingly odd. The whole situation seemed perfectly normal on the surface, but it all felt so strange. Light gave off a great appearance of being an ordinary college student who didn’t want to get involved in something dangerous, L was sure he’d convinced everyone else of it. But that image didn’t suit Light at all. 

And paradoxically, the more Light refused a position on the team, the more pressure L wanted to exert to make him do so. It felt as if he were losing to Kira, even though he couldn’t fathom what Light was thinking. However, he was finally given something he could work with! Light had denied the desire to catch Kira, showed no interest in clearing his name, and continually rejected the opportunity to work with L himself. Each and every one of those abnormal deviations irked L and caused him to need a few moments to gain back his equilibrium. The last, especially. 

Everything L had seen and therefore speculated so far said that if Light was given the chance to work with the Great L, he would grab it in an instant with both hands. Whether he was an innocent teen with nothing to do with Kira or Kira himself, both versions of Light should have leaped at the chance! Light supposedly has a crush on L, both in person and as an icon, clearly wanting to be around him even before he knew who L was. 

As Kira…the man should want to keep an eye on him and the case. He knew that Kira had to be arrogant to act like a god, but it took more arrogance than he was willing to attribute to Light for him to not fear the investigators catching his trail. Surely, he would want to watch them all…but he didn’t seem worried about it. 

L had initially come around to the idea of extending the offer to Light as both a way of watching his suspect more closely more often and also of gaining another piece of evidence for himself that Light was indeed suspicious since, while it wasn’t too unreasonable that an innocent person would want to prove their innocence by joining the team, he found it more likely that an innocent person would be comfortable letting the police handle it. If Light showed a strong interest in clearing his name by his own hands…well, it wouldn’t convince anyone else, but it would give L that extra assurance that he was on the right track. However…

Light…was inescapably different than he had expected. Getting Light to agree to join the group, while initially starting as a trap, had now become a matter of pride. 

“Mr. Matsuda, I believe you may be useful for something, after all.” L muttered under his breath, staring at the door Light had just exited out of. 

“I’m sorry, what was that?” Matsuda turned to him in confusion. 

“Nothing, it’s just that I’ve thought of a way that you might be useful to the case.” L responded, blithely. 

His suspect’s latest oddity was his strangely friendly relationship with Matsuda. Light was perfectly polite towards all of the other investigators, but he was abnormally interested in him, of all people. 

Perhaps it was that he smelled weakness? L wondered to himself. Mr. Matsuda is the most easily lead member of our little group and he follows Mr. Yagami around like a lost puppy, so it’s likely he immediately tagged Matsuda as someone he could manipulate and get more on his side. Not that the other investigators aren’t also on the fence about this. 

Whatever the reason, Light had been acting so strange in regards to Matsuda, practically being all over him. The others started chatting about it the moment Light left but even Matsuda didn’t know why Light was being so nice to him. L was very interested in knowing why he was behaving that way, himself. But first. To make use of the situation…

“Really?” Matsuda burst out in excitement. “Yes! I’ll do anything! Whatever you need!” 

"Then let's get you suited up." L said, pressing a button on his computer to call for Watari. 

~ 🅚 ~

"Why did you ask me out for lunch?" Light asked, curiously. He glanced casually around the restaurant they were in.  

This was something that had never happened in the previous timeline, not even after they'd been working together for years. A lunch hangout just between the two of them…Then again, few things were going the way they had in the previous timeline, so it's only natural. Still, he found himself curious as to how it came about. 

Light had only been back at his house for two hours before he got the phone call from an unknown number. He'd hesitantly answered the call, curiosity getting the better of him once again. If anything, he thought it would be L or something, but hearing Matsuda's nervous voice made him startle. Of all the things he hadn't expected…

Even more surprising, instead of being about the case, Matsuda wanted to see if Light would like to grab some lunch together. The investigation, Matsuda told him with audible dejection, didn't really need him right now and since he knew Light was free that day, did he want to grab some food? Apparently, he’d called Light’s dad and gotten his number from him. 

Light hadn't been sure why Matsuda made that decision, but he'd agreed, which brought them to where they were now. Since then, he'd got a working theory about what might be going on. L's efforts to strongarm him into joining the investigation has once again proved unsuccessful and Light had shown himself to like Matsuda, so L had probably recruited the man to help convince him to join. 

At times like this, Light thought back to when Matsuda snuck into Yotsuba HQ and acted his way out of a really tough spot. First, by pretending to be a manager trying to get a contract and then by pretending to be drunk and falling to his death. With that, he had far more respect for Matsuda's acting skills. He wasn't at L or Light's level of acting ability, but he was decent and could adjust on the fly. Plus, he beat out Misa and she appeared in dramas, so…

"Oh, just trying to get to know you a little better, Light." Matsuda laughed nervously, answering his earlier question. "I had nothing better to do and you really seem like a nice guy." His eyes popped open when he realized what he might've just said and hastened to explain. "Wait, I didn't mean to imply that I'm just wasting time here or that if I had something better, I would be here! I–" 

Light laughed brightly, cutting him off. "It's alright, I get it! Don't worry, I'm not offended. Having lunch with someone is a nice way to kill a couple of hours, especially if you're not needed elsewhere." 

Matsuda looked relieved at Light's words, despite the fact that Light had an inner certainty that that was not the case in this situation. He didn't need his knowledge of the previous timeline to know that, while not having the unwavering conviction of Light's father, Matsuda wouldn't just abandon the investigation even just for an afternoon. He always wanted to support others, always wanted to please, always wanted to be useful. 

No, once he'd had time to think about it, this was probably an L-related incident.

"I imagine it must be pretty stressful, being part of the Kira Investigation." Light offered. He'd witnessed first-hand the stress that it put them all under and just how many of the men involved had breakdowns. 

"Yeah, it's a big responsibility. Most of the time, I still can't believe that I was actually chosen to be on the team." Matsuda admitted. "If it's okay…can I ask…is that the reason you don't want to join the investigation?"

Light paused. Not because the question was unexpected. It was literally the most expected question he could have gotten. No, the reason was that he actually stopped to consider his answer. 

In actuality, he did want to join the investigation, but that was because it would bring him closer to L. That much reasoning would be obvious to both him and L, though he wasn't sure about the other investigators. 

But beyond that? Light wasn't interested in the investigation at all and it wasn't just because he'd already done it once before. He had no strong reason to do it besides for L. In the past, he'd wanted to keep an eye on things because he didn't want to be caught. He genuinely and thoroughly didn't care this time if he was. What he cared about was getting closer to L and a few of the other people he feels he didn't appreciate enough before, like the man before him now. If he got caught and was executed, that would put an end to that goal, but that was about it. He certainly wasn't scared of dying.

And he'd also considered it as part of his training for his future, which of course would be as an officer or a detective. Something in that general direction. It was all he'd ever prepared to do his whole life and possibly the only thing he really knew. It was the reason he'd helped his dad in previous cases, it was all practice for his future. Laying the groundwork for future goals was something he was exceedingly good at. 

But he didn't want that anymore. 

It wasn't that he loathed the idea of being a detective. How could he? He associated it with L and when he was investigating criminals, he felt more in his element. It was his element. But maybe he wanted something different with his life this time, especially since he wasn't sure how much that goal had ever really been his . How much of himself had he never realized he'd lost..? 

"It's not because of the responsibility, I've dealt more often with worse responsibilities." Light said, really not wanting to lie to him. 

Matsuda started looking really concerned and he leaned forward a bit across the table. "Then what's the problem?" Crap, Matsuda was looking at him like a puppy, with those big innocent eyes of his. "You can tell me, Light. I'll hear you out."

Pressured and trapped, that's what Light was starting to feel. It was an unusual feeling for him, these days. 

He could lie to the man, he could do that…but he didn't want to do that to his relationships again. Falling back into old patterns of pleasing those around him and avoiding confrontation by lying about his thoughts and feelings…he was raised to see it as a good thing, but in the end, it destroyed the quality of his relationships and made even the people closest to him unaware of who he truly was. It caused a divide between him and others, made him feel less close to them and allowed him to look down on them. He'd just slipped further and further from there…

He didn't want to do it again. Especially not with Matsuda, the man who had always been kind and supportive to him. He’d been on Light’s side more routinely than even his own father had, so this was one relationship he especially didn’t want to ruin with needless lies. Matsuda didn’t care about superficial things, anyway. 

"I don't…" Light paused, and then started again. "I don't want to say anything disparaging about my father or about our relationship." And he really, truly didn't. He was worried about Matsuda's reaction, given that he was intensely loyal to his father. 

Not just that, he also didn't want to make Matsuda too uncomfortable the first day they met. He was so good to him their entire past lives (shooting him notwithstanding), Light would feel like a huge jerk if he tried to agitate him immediately . Then again, Matsuda had always been accepting and willing to listen. Lying to his face about his reasons for not really wanting to be a detective anymore when the truth could eventually come out anyway was also…

At his words, surprise took over Matsuda's expression before something like an uncomfortable understanding took its place. "I know having a policeman for a father, especially one so dedicated and with a high position would be difficult…" Matsuda offered hesitantly, looking genuinely sad about it but still not getting it.

“He’s never been there for me.” Light whispered, staring down at the table.

"What?" Matsuda startled. 

"He has never been there for me." Light said, a little louder but still quiet. His calm probably eery, given the subject matter. "From as long as I can remember, it's been me, my mom, and my baby sister with frequent visits from my dad. His work has always been what he dedicated most of his life to. If he can't get his mind out of a case, he doesn't even come home."

Light didn't know how to feel about actually saying all of this. He'd talked a little to Ryuk and he'd thought about it a lot so he knew how he felt…he'd been tiptoeing around this with others, getting close but never quite tackling the iceberg of his feelings. He didn't feel relieved talking about it now and he wasn't sure if that was weird. 

"It must've been hard…" Matsuda did genuinely look like he was mourning with him. "But you know, he probably does his job so well to protect his family." Light knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to comfort Light while trying to get him to understand his father better, but…

"He never asked us about that, he made the decision on his own." Light stared at the table. "Whether or not he's doing it for us, he's a husband and father; his decisions affect us a lot and he made them on his own. He continues to make them on his own. Mom has to just put up with the pressure that her husband's job puts on her and the family, my sister barely has him in her life, the only way I can feel close to my father is by trying to make him proud, and we all have to worry endlessly about his safety. He barely comes home as it is and we still have to worry if there'll be a day when he never comes home!"

Light took a deep breath and looked up at Matsuda, who was staring at him in surprise. "I don't want to sound ungrateful for how hard my dad works, at his job and for his family, but it has felt like we're on our own since I was a little kid. And…it feels like a lot of the time, he trivializes how hard it is for us. I know he doesn't mean it that way, but he doesn't understand just how much pressure this life puts on all of us. We don't need a police officer, we need a father."

"My accomplishments?" Light said, his voice faint. "I've been the repository for my dad's ambitions for me since I was a little kid. Everything he wanted me to be…but when am I allowed to decide what I want without him standing over my shoulder and being disappointed when I don’t do something just the way he would. Different is the same thing as bad, that’s what dad taught me…but I’m not him, I am different. So I guess he’ll think I’m bad…” 

A hand shot out and grabbed Light’s on the table. Golden brown eyes shot up from where they had drifted back to the table and came directly into contact with Matsuda’s determined gaze. The other man’s dark eyes had a rare but familiar gleam in them, the look that he got when he was determined to do something and nothing would stop him. 

“Stop that, Light.” He said, stonily. “You are not bad and your dad won’t think that, either.” 

“You don’t know that.” Light said, hesitantly. It was true, wasn’t it? 

He didn’t feel the personal need to ascribe to ideas like “good” or “bad” anymore, not really. They were human constructs and even more fragile than their creators. Shinigami didn’t really have things like moral qualms, hangups, or values. However, he could acknowledge that according to human ideas, he was probably very bad. He wanted to protect people, but he understood that in anything other than a completely Utilitarian view, he was probably pure evil. He doubted anyone but L would accept him if they really knew him, even Matsuda. He did shoot him when he saw too much of him, after all. 

“I do know that, Light.” Matsuda insisted. “And not because of who your father is. I’ve only met you today, but I can already tell that you’re an introspective and thoughtful person. You think about others. That’s all I need to know that you’re not a bad person.” His eyes were practically flaming with determination to defend Light, even from himself. 

Light blinked in surprise, unsure how to respond. That was probably the first time anyone he’d worked with previously, besides L, said something like that. Specifically, that he was who he was independent of his father. Before, the entire team he’d worked with had been loyal to and defended him explicitly because of their loyalty to their chief and how it extended to Light by association. For Matsu of all people to be saying it now…

Things really have changed, haven’t they? Light smiled, softly. Moving to hold Matsuda’s hands back in a soft gesture, Light thanked him from the bottom of his heart. “Thank you. It…feels really nice to hear that. And to talk about it, too.” 

“I’m glad.” Matsuda smiled, before looking a little nervous. “If you don’t mind my asking, if you have those kinds of strong feelings towards your father, why have you been visiting him at the station multiple times a week lately?”

“Part of it is that I've been worried about him since this case started. Part of how angry I am is because of how worried we all are.” Light said. “But more than that, I’ve realized recently just how bad it is that I don’t have much of a relationship with my dad. I thought that if I could find excuses to come by more often, I might see him just a little bit more, talk to him just a little bit more. Oftentimes he’s so busy when I come by that I don’t see him at all and have to hand off whatever I brought to someone else.” 

Light huffed. “I’m used to that. It’s a numbers game, you see. If I come so often, then he has to be free to see me at least some of those times and I can see him.” Light’s voice cracked a little and he hurried to clear his throat, flushing a little in embarrassment and trying to pretend like it hadn’t happened. “I’ve been hoping that, little by little, I could build up something just a tiny bit better between us. And then maybe I could stand to tell him the things that I know he’ll have to find out about eventually. Things like how I don’t want to be a detective anymore and how I don’t want a wife.” He glanced at Matsuda as he said that last part. 

Matsuda looked his usual level of nervous but not surprised. “About that…” He started, hesitantly.

“Just as I thought, you guys know.” Light huffed with a smile. 

“You knew we did?” Matsuda asked, looking shocked now. 

“Well, I was definitely hitting on…what do you guys call him? Ryuzaki? I know him as Ryuga. Anyway, I was definitely hitting on him and I’m sure even he noticed, so I was thinking that you guys might’ve been told after that. It wasn’t a sure thing, but it made sense.” Light shrugged, doing his best to make it seem like he knew nothing of any surveillance cameras that may or may not be in his home right now. 

“Oh, I see.” Matsuda’s expression cleared up. “Still, I’m sorry, Light. About the invasion of your privacy that that was.” 

“It’s okay.” Light responded. “Well, looks like the cat’s out of the bag on that one.” He chuckled under his breath. “That still leaves a lot more I need to talk to my dad about, though. At any rate, that was why I’ve been visiting the station so often these days. I just…wanted something more with him, I guess. Something better than I can ever remember having. I wanted him to know me, even just a little bit.” 

“Light…” Matsuda tried, looking so very sad. 

“And that’s why I’d like the two of us to be friends.” Light didn’t let him be sad. “I haven’t known you for a long time, but I already really like you, Mr. Matsuda.” 

“Oh-um, by liking me, do you mean..? Because I’m flattered and you’re very attractive, Light, but-And it’s not like-but it’s inappropriate! Right! For an investigator to be-and your father’s coworker too! You’re so young, that would definitely be-” Matsuda hurriedly stumbled over his words and Light had to fight down the urge to fall over laughing. 

“Inappropriate, right?” Light finished for him, laughing a little. “No, that’s not what I meant. I really meant that I wanted to be friends.” He reassured him, fondly. “I want more meaningful and honest relationships moving forward, with both friends and family, and I think you’ll be honest with me. I think you’re a great guy that I’d be lucky to have in my life and a really good friend. I wouldn’t want to pressure you or anything, but…”

“Light, I-” Matsuda looked choked up, but an excited smile quickly spread across his face. “I’d be honored to be your friend! I don’t know if I’ll be that great a friend, but I’ll do my best!” 

“None of that!” Light laughed. “You put yourself down too much, Mr. Matsuda. I think you’re far better than you think you are!” 

“Oh! Please, call me Touta!” Matsuda fumbled, losing a bit of his steely determination in order to return to the goofy guy he usually was. “I feel like we’ve gotten much closer!” 

“I couldn’t do that.” Light fell back on his experience with politeness and familiar addresses. “You're older and more experienced than me, after all!” He smiled in a joking manner. 

“Older maybe!” Matsuda smiled in the same way back at him. “I insist. I already call you Light.” 

“Alright then.” Light agreed. “Thanks for listening to me go off like that.” And for accepting me afterwards. 

“I was happy to.” Matsuda assured him brightly, sounding as if he would truly have liked nothing better. Light felt something warm blooming in his chest. 

They stayed in the restaurant for quite a bit longer after that, eating and chatting about any amount of things. Eventually, they both had to leave and they waved goodbye to each other before parting ways. 

Light let out a deep breath as he started back home. As he did, he felt much lighter. Somehow, that discussion felt like he’d purged a lot of negativity he hadn’t fully realized he’d been carrying around with him. Matsuda really was the best. He always knew how to provide everything Light needed and he’d make sure to appreciate him the way he deserved this time around. 

He’d left Ryuk at home, so he was sure his friend would be waiting excitedly back at the house, wanting to hear all about it. Ryuk would probably start plotting if he could get L to be jealous by somehow leaking that he had a lunch date with Matsuda. Light thought the answer to that would be “probably not”, since the other man didn’t seem to be even slightly sharing his feelings yet. Just confused. He’d probably just be suspicious if he heard about it. 

Ah well, he had a friend to go home and tell all about it.

Chapter Text

Touta Matsuda left the restaurant that afternoon not really being able to identify everything he was feeling after the discussion he’d had. 

He really liked Light, so he couldn't stand seeing him so upset. I guess everyone really does have their own stuff going on, Touta couldn't help but think to himself. It was something he’d heard a lot, but it really felt true now. 

If anyone would have asked him before, he would've said that Light seemed to be the perfect kid and have the perfect life. Now, Light was just as great as he'd always seemed, but Touta could understand now that he'd been going through a lot. A lot of stuff that no one ever knew of. 

Touta felt honored that Light trusted him of all people to talk to, especially since they'd only officially met that day, but he reminded himself that it might just be that Light didn't have a lot of other people he felt he could talk to. It made him sad to think about, exactly because of how nice Light was. He found himself worrying about how the chief's family was doing. 

He'd been worrying about how the chief and his family were since this whole case started, but never more so than now. He'd felt like this case was putting them through a lot. At first, because of how dangerous and stressful this was for the chief and how that would trickle down to his family life, but now Touta realized that there had been a heavy strain there long before. Touta glanced around nervously, checking the streets for something. 

He briefly dared to think that this case might be a good thing, then. He thought that at least it was dragging all of these problems out of the woodwork so they could handle them, but he quickly shook it from his head. He shouldn't think that it was ever good for people to be upset!

He just made it around the corner and out of view of the café they'd gone to when a sleek car pulled up in front of him and Touta let out a relieved smile. At the same time, he was nervous knowing he would have to face the fact that Light's private feelings would soon be known to the whole investigation team. 

If I’d known Light would admit to those things, I never would have agreed to this. He thought, depressed. He felt like he was betraying the trust Light put into him with this, but he’d only meant to help! 

Watari got out of the car and opened the door on Touta’s side, urging him to get in. Surprisingly, Ryuzaki was in the back seat waiting for him. Touta would’ve expected him to be waiting back at the hotel. 

“Did Light inform you of why he refuses to join the investigation?” Ryuzaki said, skipping a greeting. 

“Oh! Yes…” Touta fumbled with the wire underneath his shirt, but Ryuzaki held a hand up to stop him. 

“Please keep the wire on until we get back to the hotel, where Watari can remove it.” He said. “The others were listening to the conversation in real time, but there will be a recording of it for us to listen to when we get back.” The group lapsed into an awkward silence as they made their way back, allowing Touta to think for a bit and become more agitated. 

“I…” Touta started nervously, before clearing his throat. “Do you still think Light might be involved with Kira? I know you said you weren’t anymore, but…” But he drew off. How did he justify the fact that he was questioning if what L had told him was the truth? He was supposed to trust Ryuzaki and his team! He couldn’t help but wonder about it though, with how Ryuzaki was acting. 

Ryuzaki didn’t even glance at him as he answered. “I assure you, I am sufficiently convinced that Light Yagami is innocent. I merely believe that he would be a great asset to this very important case and, as such, I am willing to go to extreme lengths to obtain his agreement.” 

Touta couldn't help but feel uneasy as the other man said that. He got what he was trying to say, but…it was hard to describe, but the words didn't sound like he meant them. Touta didn't feel comforted by them, like he thought he should. 

Touta felt uneasy about it. He didn't want to keep pushing, especially since Ryuzaki hadn't said he still suspected Light of being Kira, but leaving the conversation there still made him uncomfortable. He'd been worried about Light before without really having met him and now that he had, he couldn't stand the idea of hanging back and letting Ryuzaki think those things about Light. 

Everything was so unfair to Light. First he's suspected of being Kira, then his father is hospitalized, and now he has his personal secrets revealed to everyone. Touta swore to himself then and there that even if he couldn't do much for him, he would always do his best to stand by Light and support him. If Light needed something, he would be by his side in an instant and not because of the Chief, but for Light himself.

But still, it was so unfair. Light was such a sweet kid…

~ 🅚 ~

Soichiro Yagami was a stubborn man. He knew this about himself and this trait had served him well in his career. He had a very respectable job and, after decades of hard work and dedication, a high rank. His career was something that he was passionate about and put much energy towards. He was very highly regarded, far exceeding his actual title. He had an amazing group of men and he'd only recently realized the depth of their loyalty during this case. 

He'd been blessed with a soft-spoken, quiet, and loving woman as his wife. He'd known he wanted to marry Sachiko from shortly after they started dating, and was certain that she'd make a great wife. She was a supportive spouse and a loving mother to their children. She took care of the family and accepted her husband's demanding job and frequent absences without complaint. 

And then he had been blessed further with two beautiful children; a sweet daughter and a strong son. His family was an enormous source of pride and an additional motivation to do his job well. He wanted to create a safer world for his children to go out in every day. From the moment he was married, his job wasn't just his dream but also his greatest act of care for the people he loved. However, this same job made him somewhat removed from his own family and their daily lives, especially recently. 

Soichiro had always viewed his son as perfect. Really, ever since the boy was quite young. Light was a beautiful child and as he grew older, he showed himself to be both mature and talented in several areas. Light was unfailingly polite to anyone Soichiro introduced him to, impressing many of his colleagues. He was great at school and had an equally excellent memory. Light was a dutiful son, a dedicated student, and a responsible older brother and role model for his sister. Soichiro had no doubt that his son would be very successful one day, even outdoing himself. He'd tried to impart a strong sense of justice into both of his children and Light had said that he aspired to be like his father from young. 

Looking back, Light might have always been a standout in his family. Unlike his sister, Light had been born with the light brown hair of Soichiro's own father and it stood out as much as his manner did. 

For how long… Soichiro wondered to himself, leaning back in his hospital bed. Have I been misunderstanding my son?

This vision of who his son was that he'd had in his head, how had reality strayed so far from it without him noticing? When had he stopped knowing his son?

When Ryuzaki contacted him at the hospital, letting him know what was going on with the investigation, Soichiro insisted on being there when they listened to a tape and a car was sent to retrieve him. The hospital made a fuss about it, but they couldn't keep him there so he got in the car that came for him and left.

He's never been there for me. Those are the words Light had said and they hit the worst. More than realizing that his son felt pressured to be someone else, it hurt to hear that Light felt left alone. He was a father and a police officer, and yet he couldn't even make his son feel safe. He'd failed at both roles. 

Never been there… Soichiro stared off into space as his mind went back years and years into the past. He remembered…the day his son was born, his first child…

He remembered how much love he'd felt that day, as a little miracle was placed in his arms. Love for his wife, the wonderful woman he'd married that had now given him this beautiful child. Love for his baby, small and perfect and resting in his arms, ready to be protected. Love for his growing family, that made him feel like the luckiest man alive. 

It was painful to think back to that at the moment, feeling like he'd failed that family that he had felt so grateful for. Even now, he wasn't sure where he had gone wrong, but he knew that he had. Soichiro would be lying if he said he hadn’t wondered many times during his life if he was a good father. He tried his best for his family, but he was aware of his inadequacies. Or at least, he’d thought he was aware of them. 

He was consumed by his work, he never came home anymore, and he was barely present in his children’s lives. He knew these things and while he accepted them as facts of his life, he felt guilty about them. But hearing Light talk, Soichiro felt more deeply than ever that he had failed even more as a husband and father than he could’ve hoped to grasp on his own. 

I’ve never been there for him… When Light had said that, it had felt like a punch to his gut. He wanted to deny it! To rush to the café right at that moment despite his poor health and shake Light, insisting to him that he should know he could come to his father whenever he needed him!

But could he? 

Just as quickly as the desire came to him, he found himself coming to another thought. Could he really tell his son that he could come to him for anything? He’d told his son that several times before and had fully believed its truth when he said it, but now he was asking himself if they were really just careless words, without true meaning. 

His whole family knew how busy he was. Would Light really feel like he could interrupt his father’s work for whatever problem he was having? What brought that even more into question was Light bringing up the fact that although he’d been visiting the station so much lately, Soichiro often wasn’t available to talk, even though seeing him was what Light was secretly after. 

I had no idea that was why… Soichiro realized, heavily. He’d never asked his son why he was coming around so often lately. He’d wondered privately, but he was so busy and it was honestly harmless, so he decided that he would wait until everything calmed down to ask him about it. 

Though he’d questioned his quality as a husband in the past, he’d taken comfort in telling himself that he appeared to be parenting correctly, taking as evidence for it the success of his children, especially his son. When he could make it home, he was content to be able to see that his daughter was a well-adjusted young girl with a thriving social life, his son was excelling academically with promising career prospects, and that his family was happy. 

When he sat down to dinner with them and watched his family chatting peacefully, he could allow himself to think that this is what he did it all for, being able to protect this peaceful life for his family. Was it all an illusion, something he’d allowed himself to believe to comfort himself? Was he just a fool all this time? He was starting to feel like one. He’d always, always taken Light’s success in academics as proof that he’d raised his son right and that his son is happy. He couldn’t be a bad parent if he produced such an exceptional son. So then, he must be doing something right. 

That was what Soichiro had been telling himself and maybe he had done some things right in raising Light. Maybe he wasn’t a complete failure. 

Maybe Light was just so exceptional that he was able to shine despite Soichiro’s neglect. Throughout his son’s conversation with Matsuda, Soichiro wanted to stop listening, but forced himself to continue. Every word was like a stab through his chest, but he listened to it all, feeling more and more with each minute that he owed it to his son.

By the time they were done talking and L had gone to pick Matsuda up, Soichiro had taken to sitting, slumped forward on the couch. His men had tried to comfort him at first, but he declined to respond to them, staying with his head resting in his hands. He couldn't accept their comfort. How could he? This was all his own doing. He had ignored it for so long and now it was being shoved in his face. 

He'd never meant…to be such a bad father. That was never how he'd imagined himself when he had kids. He only wanted…he only wanted to do right by his family and he thought he was doing that, but he didn't know what that was anymore.

There was also the problem of his son's…crush…on L, which was concerning to him for a lot of reasons, as well. Ignoring the mildly uncomfortable revelation that his son was gay for the moment, the object he had chosen for that affection was also troubling. It wasn’t that he didn’t respect L’s formidable reputation or his dedication to justice, but his son deserved better than the pale, unsociable recluse. 

His bright, intelligent, caring son deserved only the best and while L deserved Soichiro’s respect, he did not deserve his son. Besides, though Soichiro didn’t know L’s exact age, the man had to be near his mid-twenties, too old for Light who deserved someone nearer his own age. And with L suspecting Light of being Kira, of all things, a relationship between the two of them would just be…

He was barely aware of L and Matsuda returning as he sat in quiet contemplation. Matsuda was immediately at his side, looking at him in concern. “Sir, are you feeling alright? Do you need a break?” 

Now that he’d had some time to think, he managed to acknowledge his subordinate by giving him a strained smile. “It’s okay, I’ll be alright. I just have a lot to think about now.” 

Matsuda continued looking at him in obvious concern, his ability to keep his thoughts off his face as nonexistent as ever, but he clearly didn’t know what to say. Soichiro didn’t blame him, he wasn’t sure what to do either. 

“I must agree with Mr. Matsuda on that front.” L huffed, walking over and retaking his seat from earlier. “You shouldn’t push yourself too hard before you’ve fully recovered. You won’t be much help to the investigation like this.” 

“Is that all you care about?!” Aizawa popped up, at L’s throat once again. 

L replied, unperturbed. “It is the most important thing. It is of paramount importance that we catch Kira and everything we do must be with that goal in mind.” 

“He’s right.” Soichiro cut in before a fight could start. “We’re all here because we were willing to put our lives on the line to catch Kira.” Aizawa visibly calmed a little at his chief’s words and so Soichiro directed his attention to L. “I’ll be sure not to tax myself any further. I’ll return to the hospital soon and take a rest. Thank you, Ryuzaki.” 

“Any time. I’m merely looking after the investigation.” L mumbled, distractedly. He started fumbling with his monitor setup. “I know you all got to listen to Matsuda’s conversation in real time, but I haven’t gotten the chance.” 

Which meant he better head back to the hospital soon if he didn’t want to listen to that conversation a second time. If he was being honest with himself, he really wasn’t up for that right now. 

“Things with Light are going to be okay.” Matsuda said, finding his voice. 

“I don’t know what the right thing to do is.” Soichiro said heavily, being painfully honest with his subordinate. 

"You could talk to Light." Matsuda suggested, giving a hopeful smile to his chief. "Making decisions on your own was one of the problems Light mentioned. So I think you two should decide how to move forward together. Light’s smart and he’s mature, he’ll understand if you talk to him.” 

Soichiro let out a breath as he considered those words. “You’re right. That would probably be the best option, but I don’t look forward to telling Light that I let him be taped without his knowledge.” 

Matsuda winced in sympathy. “Just talk to him, Chief. It sounds like you both have a lot to say to each other.” 

You couldn’t be more right, Soichiro’s lips twisted into a small smile. He really should talk to his son. “I think I’ll take your advice. I’m not sure how open I’ll be able to be, but at the very least, I can tell Light I’m sorry.” 

Matsuda rested a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “Don’t be too hard on yourself, Chief. I know this can all be fixed.” 

I hope it can be, Soichiro thought to himself, gazing out the window. 

He had to talk to Light.

~ 🅚 ~

"Doesn't want to be a detective, huh?" L thought, sitting quietly.

Soichiro Yagami was long gone and L had listened to Light’s conversation with Matsuda several times since then and he was struggling to fit what he’d heard into what he knew of Light. Light was a boy at the top of his social circle and happy to be there. He idolized his father and wanted to join law enforcement. He was cool and detached from those around him, except for his peculiar interest in L himself. 

That is what L had thought of Light, but the conversation he'd been listening to had called all of it into question. Apparently Light didn't want to be like his father, didn't want to be in law enforcement, and wasn't as content at the top of his pecking order as he appeared.

The unfortunate thing was that L’s instincts were telling him that Light was being truthful, something L didn’t want to believe and so L was struggling to pin down what Light's true desires and intentions were. Were his predictions of Light's character the truth or was what Light said to Matsuda the truth? Or was it some combination of the two? Light was being as irritatingly baffling as always, nearly impossible to pin down, just like Kira. Speaking of…

Kira has shown the strong ability to know things that he shouldn’t know, L thought quietly to himself. How much he knows is arguable and it can’t be determined yet how much of his knowledge is due to informants and how much is due to his apparent supernatural ability. Regardless, if he can kill people without being present, it doesn’t seem unreasonable that would be able to access information without the use of cohorts. 

There are quite a few things I can reasonably say that Kira doesn’t know. Still. L cocked his head. If Light is Kira, could he have figured out that Matsuda was wearing a wire? It’s possible…but how would I go about proving it when I’m not even sure of it myself?

Because as much as he wanted to believe Light was being disingenuous, he found his instincts told him something different. L had always been inclined to listen to his instincts. If these are indeed Light’s true feelings on the subject, could this have been the origin of Kira? It wouldn’t explain Kira’s abilities, but it would explain how they came about their twisted sense of justice and their hatred of criminals. L pondered. And there does seem to be an undercurrent of respect towards officers in Kira’s behavior that Light upholds. If anything, this only strengthens the connection between them.

Well, he was able to find out why Light didn't want to join the investigation, but he also had more questions now. L came away from his reflections with one concrete thought: he wouldn't get any further in this investigation until he confronted Light directly once more. It seemed the investigation was routinely coming to a standstill until he could see Light again, making it all the more apparent that Light was the key to all of this.

If he wanted to make sense of the case, he had questions for the chief's son. Additionally, it was imperative that he convince Light to join the investigation so that he could keep him close and keep an eye on him. There was a 95% chance that Light was Kira and even just a 5% chance would warrant keeping a close eye on him. Light was almost certainly Kira and couldn't be allowed to run around all day with them having no idea what he's doing. 

Now that the FBI have basically finished their investigation, finding nothing, he could already feel the pressure from the other investigators to remove the surveillance cameras in the Yagami household. With nothing to show for either of his efforts to prove Light Yagami suspicious to people outside of himself, L knew this was yet another battle he was losing against Kira. 

It was more important now than ever that he find another way to keep an eye on Light now that he might soon be pressured into dropping his last method of watching Light. He had to replace it with something before Light was once again completely free to do whatever he wanted in secrecy. It would be especially helpful if he could continue to dress up his offer to have Light join the case as wanting Light's help, seeing how the others were beginning to make it known just how little they appreciated L's ongoing "harassment" of Light. 

There was so much he had to consider and Light was so confusing that he couldn't begin to decipher his words and actions. 

L detested not knowing something. 

He had to talk to Light.

Chapter Text

Light was confused when he got out of class and saw a missed message from his father. He didn't know when the last time his father called his phone was. Worried, Light quickly pulled up the voicemail and listened to it, fearing something else had happened to his dad. 

His shoulders relaxed as he heard his father's voice in the recording, sounding a little stressed but alright, asking him to come by the hospital when he got the chance. He said that there was something they needed to talk about. Light stared at his phone after the message ended, his personal Shinigami best friend floating behind him. 

That's weird, Light thought quietly as he stared at it. It didn't sound like his father was mad, but he couldn't tell exactly from his voice. It was abnormal that his father had called him for a non-emergency and it was odd that he asked Light to stop by. This definitely didn't happen the last time, too. Shaking things up was entirely the intention though, so he wasn't going to lose sleep over it. 

Light shrugged it off, shoving his phone into his pocket and heading across campus. His classes were over for the day anyway, so he might as well go straight over and see what his dad wanted. Light instinctively wanted to hang back at school to see L, but he pushed the urge away. Similar to the previous timeline, L's attendance at school was hit-or-miss. He obviously only showed up for classes when he felt like it. It wasn't like he was actually interested in the college or in a degree in the first place. Apparently, today was one of those days that he couldn't be bothered. 

On the bright side, Light took no small amount of pride in knowing that the only reason L enrolled at all was because of his interest in him . At any rate, Light would endeavor to wait until L showed up again. He could wait, even if he didn't want to. 

Unlike his school, the hospital was much further from the house, so Light took the train there, making it impractical to walk. Taking the train made the trip quick though and before long, he was standing in front of the large building. 

"You going in?" Ryuk asked, curiously. 

"Yeah. Yeah, I am. I'm just…thinking." Light muttered under his breath, taking care that no one heard him talking to himself from a distance. 

"About what your old man wants?" The Shinigami prodded. 

"Yeah…I wonder what it is." Light replied. "I'm not worried, it's just…" Light drew off, not sure what to say actually, now that he was trying to put it into words. "Let's go." He said instead and took up a brisk pace towards the entrance. Ryuk didn't say anything, but the sound of flapping wings let him know that Ryuk was following him, as if he needed the reassurance. Ryuk was always right behind him. 

The hospital staff were pleasant enough and even more so after he flashed his charming smile in every direction. He was able to get up to his father's room in record time. After standing out in the hallway the same way he had stood outside the hospital, he only allowed himself the slightest of pauses in front of the room before he grabbed the handle and went in. 

Light really wasn't sure what he was expecting, but apparently there had been an expectation. The room was quiet, clean, peaceful and, most importantly, empty. There was only his father laid out in his hospital bed, an IV next to him but not connected to his arm. The starkness of the room made his father look pale, but his pallor was a lot better than it had been when he had first been admitted. 

Mindful of the tranquility of the space, Light gently closed the door behind him so that there was only the quietest of clicks. His father was awake and although he'd appeared to be staring off into space when Light came in, he turned to smile tightly at him when the door closed.

"Light," Soichiro greeted. "It's good to see you, thank you for coming. You're here earlier than I expected."

"I came over right after school." Light explained. "Classes are over for the day." 

His father's smile did something weird where it became more genuine at his words at the same time that it became more strained. That was puzzling. "You didn't need to do that. You should've gone home, changed clothes and rested before coming all the way here. I'm sure you're tired after a full day." 

"It's alright, I'm fine." Light waved off without a thought, giving his father a smile and pacing further into the room. If anything, his father's expression fell even further at his words and it left Light confused. What was he saying wrong?

"It's okay for you to not be so timely sometimes." Soichiro said quietly. 

Light blinked, dumbfounded. I don't think I have ever heard him say that sentence. Part of being the perfect son was not only being on time but being early. He did everything he was expected to as early as he possibly could and it was never brought up as an issue before. 

Seeing that he didn't respond, his dad spoke up again. "But I'm glad you're here, there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about." 

"Right." Light put on a smile, getting his footing back. "What about? I'm here to listen to whatever you need." 

"Light." Soichiro's expression softened as he looked at him. He wasn't quite looking at Light like he was seeing him for the first time, but perhaps something close in nature to it. "I've had a realization recently." 

"A realization?" Light prodded, pulling up a chair and sitting in his usual spot beside the bed. Ryuk swirled in the air behind him. 

Soichiro spent a long moment in silence, looking as if he were trying to force himself to say something. "I'm sorry I couldn't see you very much when you were visiting the department." His expression said that that wasn't what he wanted to say. 

Light chose not to call attention to it. "It's no problem. I know you're busy, I didn't expect you to be able to see me every time." 

"Less than half." Soichiro gritted out, fisting his sheets. "I saw you less than half of the times you came by." 

"I…" Light didn't know what to say to the attitude his father was displaying. 

Soichiro held up a hand to stop Light from talking. "I've failed you, my son." It looked like it took every ounce of power he had to force the words out, regretting every syllable. 

Wha– Light's brain screeched to a halt. He didn't understand what was going on here. What happened? 

"I should tell you, Light. Weeks ago, L placed video cameras and listening devices in our home in order to watch everything that happened." Soichiro stared down at his bed sheets as he admitted this, shame all over his face. "I'm so sorry. I know it's an unforgivable invasion of your privacy, as well as Sayu and your mother's. L wanted to investigate the families of some of the investigators, including myself, and insisted it was vitally important to the case. I'm not sure if it means anything, but none of us meant any harm by it, we only wanted to do what it took to clear you." 

Light stared at his father with wide eyes. The man looked like the weight of the world was pressing down on his shoulders. For his part, Light was shocked that his dad was admitting to what they did. This…wasn't how he thought it would go. 

In the past, they hadn't told him about the surveillance until he'd agreed to join the investigation and started. Understandably, it was for security reasons. Plus, he was sure L told him partly because he wanted to see Light's reaction to the information. Any normal person would be outraged, uncomfortable, upset at hearing that, even if they understood why it was done. Kira, and Light, were calm and accepting. Unsurprised. 

Light thought that it would go the same way or, if not, L would still be the one to bring it up and that he would do it to try and study Light. This wasn't that. Actually….

Light glanced at Ryuk out of the corner of his eye and met the Shinigami's eyes. Ryuk looked at him in confusion for a second before jolting into realization. "Oh, right! Cameras! Got it!" He flew up and started scrambling across all the surfaces of the room, unseen by anyone besides Light. 

"You…allowed cameras to be set up in the house?" Light replied, hesitantly. "You…allowed us to be watched?" 

If possible, Soichiro shrunk further in on himself. "I believed it was the only way. I just wanted him to stop insinuating our family members could be Kira, but it led to him forming an obsession with you. I sacrificed your privacy for the investigation and it only made things worse in the end." 

"And it seems," Soichiro gave a sad, regretful smile. "This isn't the first time I've put an investigation ahead of you, is it?"

"Dad?" Light said, shocked. What was he saying?

"No cameras or listening devices!" Ryuk called out from a wall corner. 

So this isn't part of L's schemes? Light thought. 

"Now that I think about it…in a way, I think I'm grateful for the surveillance. I learned more about your life than I ever have and I'm not happy about what I've learned." Soichiro sighed. 

“Like?” Light furrowed his brows, wondering if he was talking about Light’s constant exclamations of love for L and if so, how that translated into the conversation they were having. 

“Light…you don’t want to be an officer, do you?” Soichiro asked, heavily. 

“Uh, what?” Ryuk said, head swiveling around to look at the man. 

“Dad?” Light jolted. How did he know that? Did Touta tell him? Did Touta tell L? He had really thought Touta would’ve kept the secret, but he couldn’t find it in himself to be angry at the man if he did tell them. Touta was almost incapable of malice, so it was undoubtedly done with the best of intentions. As for his dad’s question, he wasn’t sure how to answer. 

“Now would be the best time to be honest with me, Light.” His dad prodded, practically reading his mind for possibly the first time. 

Light hesitated in answering, but he had nothing if not guts. “I didn’t know how to tell you.” He admitted, tentatively. 

Soichiro let out a breath Light hadn’t noticed he was holding. “I can see why. If you’re worried about…I’m not disappointed in you, Light.” He still wasn’t looking at him and Light found himself staring down at his hands in his lap, not sure why it was becoming painful to look at his dad. 

“Are you sure you’re not? You always wanted everything perfect, always wanted me to follow in your footsteps. You always wanted me to be a proper man and take care of the family and make the country better and safer and…” Light didn’t know why he started talking and he was only half-aware of what he was saying anymore, but he couldn’t stop. Why couldn’t he stop? 

The words just kept pouring out and it seemed the breaks had gotten ripped out of his system. “You haven’t mentioned L yet, but I know you must have heard that and do you have nothing to say about it? You have to have something to say. How can you tell me you’re not ashamed of me when you won’t look at me and you know that I don’t want to be anything like the son you wanted–” 

“Light.” Soichiro said loudly, cutting Light’s tirade off and shocking him out of his muttering stupor. Later, Light would be grateful to have had the sense knocked back into him. In the moment, Light just jerked out of it and hurriedly looked back up at his father who was finally looking at him. 

Soichiro had that steely look in his eyes that Light was used to seeing, face set in stone. The brief thought flashed through Light’s mind that his dad was angry at him but just a second later, Soichiro reached  forward and clasped his hand onto Light’s shoulder. “Light.” His dad said his name again, quieter this time but just as sternly. “I don’t want to hear you talking like that. The only son I've ever wanted was you. You are my son, you have always been enough for me.” 

Light’s mouth felt dry as he looked his dad in the eyes, searching for truth. In them, he saw the same steely determination he had seen so often during hard moments in the Kira investigation. The sight of it made something in Light settle and he began to feel just a little bit more like himself again. And even deeper inside himself, he felt something else be soothed. 

"Dad…do you…" Light swallowed. "Do you really mean that?" 

For a moment, Light felt like he was in a memory he had from his childhood. He was six years old and leaning up into his father's lap as he sat in a chair. His dad was telling him that one day Light could be a detective like he was. Young Light looked up excitedly at his dad, all childish excitement and asked if he could really do it, happy but needing the reassurance from his father like he needed the air. 

For a moment, Light felt the same as he had in that moment. Excited but desperately needing the reassurance. 

"I mean it, Light." His dad smiled, tiredly. "I'm sorry I pushed you so hard that you didn't know that. I want to tell you now, since I failed to do it before. I only pushed you because you're my son and I wanted the best for you. You and your sister both. I just…had ideas about what would be the best for you two and I never truly asked you what that was." 

Dad… Light stared at his father silently as the man unloaded some built-up emotions of his own. 

"I never realized how bad things had gotten and that's my fault. I buried my head in the ground but no longer. I promise things will be better!" Soichiro insisted, heatedly. "I can't promise that I'm completely comfortable with everything I've learned, but that doesn't mean I'm ashamed of you. If you're pursuing happiness, then you're doing the right thing." 

Light felt elation welling up nearly out of control inside him but suppressed it cautiously. "Are you saying that about everything? " His dad caught his meaning. 

“I have to say that I never expected anything like that and I’m not overly happy about it…but I’m not trying to say it’s a bad thing either, I…” Soichiro sighed and scrubbed his face with his hands. “I’m sorry, I know I’m not dealing with this the best way I could be. If I was a better man, I could easily handle all of this and be able to use all the right words. I don’t want it to seem like I’m upset that you aren’t interested in women. I’m not angry at you for for being different than I expected, I’m angry at myself for expecting you to be different.” 

Something like excitement began swelling even higher in Light’s chest at what his father was saying. He was starting to allow himself to believe that things could work out between them. He looked with hopeful eyes at his dad and Soichiro seemed to straighten up even higher at the sight of it. Bolstered by it.

"I’m not sorry this happened. I think…no, I'm sure that what I'm really sorry about is letting go of that image of ideal family life that I had for you. For as long as I've thought about it, I imagined you settling down with a nice girl and buying a home like ours and having kids and having a similar job to the one I have now. In retrospect, I imagined your life choices being the exact same as my own." His dad huffed under his breath, a wryly amused sound. 

His dad spent a moment in silence before continuing. "I'm not upset that you're gay. I'm just sorry to let go of the dream I had for your future." A small smile spread across his face now. "It wasn't the knowledge of your leanings that has been tormenting me lately. That fell to the side in the face of how much I had failed you. When I realized that, I realized something else. All I need from you is for you to do whatever makes you happy. If you're chasing what you want, then I'll find a way to make peace with whatever you decide to do, no matter what it is."

And he really seemed to mean it, too, Light realized. The look in his dad's eyes seemed a little strained, likely a combination of the stress of the day's revelations and his admitted difficulty with letting go of everything he'd expected of his golden child. It was probably difficult for him to talk about all this, to make these promises aloud, even though he meant them. But he was doing it anyway, despite how awkward and uncomfortable it was making him. 

Light felt that warm feeling pool in his stomach, the kind that made him feel like the sun was coming out from behind dark clouds and bathing him in its warmth. He…didn't know how long it has been since he'd felt so loved . For the first time in a long time, he could honestly say his father truly loves him. He hadn't realized how good it would feel to think it.

Wordlessly, Light stood up from his chair and moved to his father's bedside, bangs blocking his eyes from view. 

"Light?" His father looked at him in surprise but Light didn't pay any mind. In the next instant, he lurched forward and gave his father a big hug, wrapping both arms entirely around him and squeezing. 

"Light…" His dad whispered, body relaxing. Light felt rather than saw his dad return the embrace, wrapping his arms around Light to hold his son to him tightly. 

"Believe me…" His dad continued just as quietly, sounding as if he were on the verge of tears. "I am so sorry. I can't promise I'll be the perfect father to you going forward. But I'll do everything I can to try to be the parent you deserve, so please let me try."

~ 🅚 ~

Light wanted to vibrate with excitement when L showed up to their classes the next day, something that his ever present friend Ryuk readily teased him about. Light dutifully ignored the well-intentioned ribbing.

Light hadn’t been surprised to learn that L shared all of his classes. What would be the point of going spying at Light’s college if he didn’t sit in on his classes? It only made sense, but Light still found it funny that the best detective in the world came here willing to get classes on how to be a detective. He probably would’ve been bored out of his mind! Luckily for him he didn’t have to, since that wasn’t the degree that Light was pursuing. 

Instead of leaving after their first class had ended, Light stayed in his seat to see if L would approach him. Several people that he barely knew stopped by his desk to talk to him and so he put on his mask, chatting happily with them. Out of the corner of his eye, Light caught sight of L standing hunched at the back of the group, waiting for his turn with Light. It only made him want his peers to leave ever more, so he could spend time with L. 

Eventually they moved on and that was when L pounced, much to Light’s delight. “Hello, Light.” L greeted, sounding nearly as unbothered as he usually did. “How’s it going?”

“Better now that you’re here.” Light easily replied with his own greeting. He was only telling the truth, but he mostly just said it to screw with him. 

L slid into a stunned silence, blinking in confusion. “...why is that?” 

Light wanted to roll his eyes. Of all the things to respond with. “You really don’t know why? I like you, Hideki.” Light asserted. 

Another pause. “You’re still calling me that.”

And you’re still avoiding the issue, Light replied in his mind. Out loud, he said, “I can’t call you by your real name and it’s what I first got to know you as. Besides, what would happen if someone here heard me calling you by a name besides the one you enrolled under?” Light reasoned, teasingly. 

He could see the resulting calculations going through L’s mind. He knew the other man was thinking how very Kira-like Light’s thoughts were or something in that vein. Light’s lips tugged further into a smile. 

“I suppose you’re correct.” L said, clearly trying his best to sound nonchalant, as if he weren’t psychoanalyzing everything Light said. “If you like me so much, then why are you refusing to join the investigation?” He asked, switching topics. 

Light responded by getting up from his desk and slinging his backpack over his shoulder. “We have our next class soon, so we don’t want to be late. How about we talk about this on our way there and after that, we can catch a quick lunch together before the next one?” He gave L a kind smile over his shoulder. 

“You realize I’m only here for you, right? I don’t particularly care about missing my classes, they won’t expel me.” L commented. 

"Oh, he's being awfully forward today, isn't he?" Ryuk joked, knowing Light couldn't respond.

“Oh, I know you don’t care.” Light gave a happy laugh. “But I do.” 

L peered closely at him for a moment, then began following him to the door and into the hallway. “That sounds like a good idea, then. But Light, I need an answer.” He prodded.

“Yes, you do.” Light acknowledged breezily. And he could understand why L was wondering about that. A normal person would be tripping over themself to get to spend time with their crush, especially if it was helping them with an important project and truthfully, Light did want to be part of the investigation, if only because of the fact that he could spend time with L and the others he’d started to get close to. 

In fact, although he’d decided to make L work to get him on the team, he was starting to get antsy about it. It was taking too long! He wanted to spend hours a day every day with L again. At least L wasn’t giving up, as usual, but Light might just help it along now on the sly. “To be completely honest, I don’t hate the idea of working on the case.” He said with an air of reluctance. 

“Because you don’t wish to be a detective anymore.” L concluded, directly.

You’re a very bold man, you know. Light thought in amusement. Externally, he stopped walking and gave L the look . “How did you know that?” In part, this was a farce, but in another, he had been wondering this since he had his conversation with his father. 

One thing he hadn’t bought was that he’d revealed that information on camera at home, so where did the both of them pick it up from? He could easily accept the idea that L simply got the idea from observing Light, but his father just wasn’t that level of observant. 

L studied him as he answered. “I have an admission to make. I’m afraid I was listening to your conversation with Mr. Matsuda at that cafe.” L didn’t sound even slightly sorry. And wasn’t that a surprise! Not L’s lack of remorse over boundary- crossing and law breaking, of course, but the fact that he was being recorded at that time. 

He could’ve slapped himself. That was the absolute last time he left Ryuk at home! He was lucky it wasn’t any big deal for him whether they were listening or not, he didn’t feel hurt or violated by it at all. Honestly, if that kind of thing bothered him on an emotional level, he probably wouldn’t have fallen for L in the first place, given the older man’s habits. He would've been too hurt by them. He knew L well enough to accept any and all violations of privacy and personal space before even starting all of this for the second time. 

He could actually stand to violate that last one a little more, Light thought crossly. He really wished L would get to be more interested in invading his personal space than he was in invading his conversations. 

The only thing that had ever bothered him about it was what he might be caught doing or saying, and he didn’t say anything to Touta that he didn’t think would be known eventually. He was also lucky that he didn’t mind that particular information being known earlier than he’d planned, it didn’t really mess with him going forward. 

“You don’t sound like you feel bad at all for doing it.” Light said, but quickly followed it up without waiting. “Why did you do it?” 

“Because I am very invested in getting you to join the investigation.” L said in a tone that explained almost everything. “You see, this is quite possibly the most challenging case I’ve ever faced and I’ve long ago admitted that I’ll need some assistance in apprehending Kira.” 

It must really annoy you to keep admitting, even if indirectly, that you’re outmatched. Light thought. 

That was the essence of about half of what L said, the other half being ostensibly complimenting him. They were mostly just indirect compliments though, mostly relying on the underlying implication that Light was intelligent and talented and whatever else, so it could barely be called complimenting. Plus, Light knew too much about this man to take it as genuine and be flattered at it like someone else might. He was sure L only said it to stroke his ego so that Light would slip up. 

He might be wrong, but he’d always secretly suspected that L almost never thought very highly of anyone. 

“I’m not sure why you want someone who confessed to being a Kira supporter to work with you so badly.” Light cocked his head, painting his face with confusion. 

L narrowed his eyes at him, but what emotion in particular was behind it, Light couldn’t say. “That admission was indeed rather shocking, Light. I can honestly say I never suspected it.” 

No, you suspected me of much worse, Light thought, wryly. 

“However,” L continued. “You underestimate how much I want you to join us. I am prepared to go to extreme lengths to convince you.” 

Light didn’t know if L was just unaware of the implications of what he’d just said or if L he was trying to be threatening. Either way, instead of being intimidated, Light felt a jolt of excitement go up his spine at the intense words. Even more intense and exciting if he were to take it out of context…

“I’ve thought it over and I don’t believe you being a supporter of Kira will pose a significant problem for the investigation.” L continued, unaware of where Light’s mind was going. “In fact, I believe your….views….will bring a much-needed new perspective to the case.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Light raised his eyebrows incredulously at what he’d just heard. 

“I assure you, I am entirely serious about this.” L stated, calmly. “And what if I don’t want to join the investigation because I don’t want to help you catch Kira?” 

“If that had been a point of contention for you, then you likely would have mentioned it earlier. Surely it would’ve come up one of the many times you were objecting to joining and supplying your reasoning for it. This leads me to conclude that it isn’t a problem for you.” L explained. 

That’s right! Light realized. For a Kira supporter, I didn’t really lean heavily on loyalty to Kira for my reasoning. Light put on a smile. “Kira isn’t so weak that the addition of a mere college student would take them down. I’m not worried about it.” 

“You aren’t, huh.” L muttered under his breath. A second passed and then he raised his voice a little. “Your faith in Kira is touching.” L deadpanned. “But you shouldn’t sell yourself short. I am certain your intelligence and insight would be of tremendous help.” 

“Can we get back on the previous topic? Your surveillance?” Light prodded, unwilling to let L push further back into his relationship with Kira. 

“Right. Your relationship with your father.” Light didn’t think he was imagining the smug note in L’s voice, teasing him about their relationship. “I’m given to understand that your main reasons for your refusal are that you do not want to be a detective - as your father wishes - and that you have a strained relationship with the police chief. Is that correct?” 

Well, it’s more disinterest than anything else. Light answered honestly, even if only in his own mind. He’d done that whole song and dance before; joining the investigation that was searching for him under the pretense of helping the investigation only to learn L’s real name and all that jazz. He and L had been the only ones to recognize the farce for what it was and they used the opportunity to investigate each other.

He still did want to be part of the investigation, boredom aside, but that was because it would get him closer to L. None of this, he could say, though…well, maybe he could say that last part. “That’s right.” Light agreed, instead. “Part of me feels like if I take part in the Kira investigation, I might get sucked further into that kind of life and become entrenched in a career I never really wanted. Dad especially would have expectations afterwards and I want to avoid that. Or I did, anyway.” 

Light’s indications that something had changed with him was entirely intentional. He wanted to nudge L closer to “convincing” him to join the team without being too eager. Not that it would make L any less suspicious.

“Did something happen?” L cocked his head. 

Light made a show of shifting his body nervously. “Well, me and my dad talked.” 

“May I ask what about?” L asked, eyes following Light’s every move. 

“Dad told me about how you guys set up cameras in our house to watch me.” L’s lack of a response confirmed for Light that his dad had gotten permission from L to spill the piece of information. He really hadn’t thought that his father would go rogue like that, to be honest. “He said that he realized from watching me how much pressure he’d been putting on me to conform to his views…and how sorry he was.”  

Light smiled softly against his will. “We talked it out, maybe for the first time ever.” 

“I see.” L nodded. “That must have been a relief. And did it happen to change any of your feelings about the investigation?” 

“My feelings about the investigation…” Light hummed, closing his eyes and pretending to think. “I suppose I don’t feel so worried about working with my dad anymore.”

“Hm.” L mumbled, looking at him. “Would you consider joining if I could promise my assistance with something when the investigation is completed?” Light got the impression that L had come to college that day prepared with this offer, rather than producing it on the spur of the moment. 

“Is that a blanket offer to help me with anything or do you have something specific in mind?” Light asked, genuinely curious. 

“If you join the investigation and help us catch Kira, I am prepared to pull some strings to get you whatever internship or job you want once you graduate.” L stated, steadily. 

That was unexpected, Light thought. “You’ll help me get any job I want?” 

L nodded. “Whatever it might be, I am confident that I have connections to get you hired, even if it is a high government position. We have covered that I am aware that you don’t want to be a detective. To be honest, that makes more sense to me, as the degree you are pursuing would be confusing if matched to someone who aspired to be a detective.” 

“So you slithered into my school record, too.” Light said, a statement of fact, with a smile on his face. 

L’s eye twitched. “You continue to be completely unbothered by your privacy being violated. Is that because I am a detective or because I am ‘Hideki’?” 

I’m surprised you would bring it up so directly, given how perplexing you find my feelings for you, Light thought with both surprise and some good humor. L was basically asking if Light didn’t mind his intrusions because he was a respected detective or because Light loved him. 

“More the second than the first.” Light answered completely honestly. “Hideki is very important to me.” 

“I see.” L muttered. 

Do you? Light wasn’t sure he did. But he would . 

“Well, you’re right about the degree. It doesn’t tell you very much about what I plan to do, but it does provide some ideas about what I don’t want to do. But what makes you think I need your help? I’m the top student in Japan going to the top school in Japan. I’m talented and well-liked and have connections in law enforcement. What makes you think I couldn’t make plans to get any job I wanted with my own efforts?” Light didn’t speak with any emotion other than curiosity. He mostly just wanted to see what L’s response would be. 

“You’re right that you could probably get whatever you wanted eventually. You’re a very intelligent and determined person, Light.” L made that sound like a partial insult. “However, your achievements may not be felt as strongly outside of Japan so if you plan to look elsewhere immediately, you may find yourself having to work for years in Japan before you can get transferable experience.” 

He cocked his head to the side as he looked at Light. “Additionally, my assistance will make the process far easier than if you were to do it on your own straight out of college and your efforts could be better spent elsewhere instead. Years of relevant experience is required for most job positions on the level that you deserve. You could be placed in a higher level immediately instead of having to prove yourself by working up from the bottom.

You’re right that you are already an impressive young man that can make his own way. What I’m offering is the support to quickly and easily be able to go anywhere and do anything. I gathered from our conversations that that would be something that appeals to you.” 

Ryuk's head swung back and forth as he watch the back-and-forth between Light and L. 

"You’re not wrong," Light allowed himself to be swayed by the words, just a little. He always felt so happy when L showed that he knew him and paid attention to what he wanted, more so than anyone had ever bothered to before. Plus, a large part of him couldn’t help but imagine a future where he leaves Japan and starts a life with L.

"I suppose there's just one thing to say, then." Light said, more than ready to spend his days with L again. "When do we start?"

"You can start this weekend if you're amenable." L assured. 

"Whoa, he's moving quickly! If I didn't know any better, I'd think he was just as desperate as you are." Ryuk cackled. 

"Sounds good to me, but before we start…how do I know you're going to keep your promise about helping me with my career after the case is over?" Because Light couldn't resist teasing him a little. 

"Do you not trust me?" L responded, almost playfully. 

"I think you're a liar at the best of times." Light shot back, absolutely no hesitation. 

The corner of L's lips tilted up into a hint of a smile and he pressed a thumb to his lips, almost in an effort to hide that fact. "I assure you that it will be no trouble for me to keep my word. It likely won't take more than a single phone call. That is," L's tone was a mixture of a hint of amusement and something else. "Assuming you don't turn out to be Kira yourself."

"You mean, assuming you can prove either conclusion." Light met the direct challenge with one of his own. 

L's eyes narrowed in response and the two were caught staring straight into each other's eyes. Suddenly, Light’s eyes glanced downwards as he noticed L’s feet shifting. The movements seemed strange in nature and it took Light a few seconds to see why. It was discomfort. And if Light wasn’t wrong, it also looked like he was trying to scratch his foot with his other one through the shoes. 

L has always had that weird behavior with shoes, hasn’t he? Light pondered, not noticing when L noticed his staring and followed his eyes to his feet. No, not the shoes, I don't think.

“Uh, Light? What’s up?” L’s question went unanswered. 

Light remembered what he read about people who had sensory issues and the extreme discomfort with socks rang a bell. He hadn’t paid much attention to it in his past life besides noting with disapproval how strange it was that L often wore shoes without socks. This was one of the times when he was wearing them and “it looks uncomfortable…”

“May I ask what does?” L’s voice finally permeated Light’s thoughts. 

Light jerked. “Did I say that out loud?”

“Yes, you did.” L stared speculatively at him. “What looks uncomfortable?” He pressed. 

“Your socks. You look uncomfortable in them, like you want to take them off right now.” Light contemplated. “Why are you wearing them if you hate them so much?”

“...” L doesn’t answer for a moment, looking like he was both surprised and like he was calculating. Light remained impassively waiting for him and it paid off. “I don’t know how you’ve determined that, but be assured, I can handle it.” 

Light didn’t like the implication there. “Maybe this is me overstepping,” When had he ever not done that? “But you shouldn’t have to. I don’t know why you’re wearing them, but it’s not worth making yourself uncomfortable for. I won’t think less of you for it, I promise.’ 

L made no answer. 

A few seconds later, Light's watch beeped and jolted the two out of their staring contest. "Damn. We'll have to get back to this later." Despite saying that, Light smiled as he turned on his heel and started back down the hallway. 

"Why is that?" L inquired, not quite moving to follow him yet. 

Light looked back over his shoulder, not pausing in his stride and smile still in place. "Because now we're late."

~ 🅚 ~

When Light showed up at the newest hotel with his father - finally checked out of the hospital - that weekend, he met with quite the reception. All of the investigators flocked to him, some being more loud than others. 

"Light! I'm so glad you could make it!" Matsuda smiled widely as he said it, his face bright like a lightbulb. 

The other man's excitement was outright contagious, Light wouldn't have been able to stop the smile that spread across his own face even if he wanted to. 

"Good to see you, Light." A much more calm Aizawa stated, coming over to shake his hand. "I'm relieved to have you on the case with us."

"Hi, Light. How've you been?" Naomi asked him, less excitable than Touta but looking no less happy to see him. 

Light smiled brightly at the group. "Hi, guys. Glad to be here! I've been fine, Noami, thank you. How are you and Raye?" 

"We've both decided to stay in Japan until the Kira case is over." Naomi informed him with a smile. "We've found a more permanent place to say for the time being, we're renting out an apartment." 

"I'm glad to hear that!" And Light really was. He'd grown fond of Naomi in the time since they'd met again. He was happy to know that they weren't going to leave just yet. "But can you do that? Doesn't Raye have to go back to the U.S. for his job?" He worked for the American FBI, after all…

“Luckily, Ryuzaki pulled some strings for us and got Raye more-or-less put on leave. He may be doing some work online and he might have to fly back once in a while, but we’re primarily stationed here now.” Naomi explained. 

L helped, huh? Way to go, L! Light cheered in his mind. It was probably no big thing for him, but it still showed how much he wanted Naomi to help with the investigation that he interceded on her behalf. 

Then again, Light acknowledged. Maybe part of it was to have Raye close at hand, too. Raye was the agent tasked with stalking me, after all. And he was at the center of the whole kidnapping debacle. It would make sense if L wanted to have access to him at a moment’s notice if something came up. “I’m glad to know you’ll be sticking around.” He said to her. 

“That’s right. It looks like we’ll be seeing a lot of each other.” Naomi grinned. 

“So!” Light addressed the room. “What should I start with?” 

LIght quickly found himself looking through footage of Kira. Or at least, the closest thing they had to footage of Kira. Naturally, it consisted of recordings of verified or suspected Kira killings. He’d already decided before going there that basically all of the tasks he’d be given would be tests from L. After all, if he knew anything about L, the man was already absolutely convinced that Kira was Light, to the exclusion of all others. Under that belief, giving Light any legitimate tasks to catch Kira would be counterproductive. 

Light reminded himself of that as he noted down a few clips that weren’t part of his body count. He wasn’t sure if L knew those weren’t his and planted them there of it they were just mistakes L or someone else made. His love’s trickery was at the forefront of his mind, regardless. 

L’s tricks were both ingenious and delusional in that, no matter which way you go, he’ll find reason to be suspicious. For example, if Light noted them down, then it indicated he had inside knowledge on Kira’s activities. If Light pretended they were all Kira’s killings though, then he was feigning ignorance in a way that flew contrary to Light’s already established intelligence and observational skills. 

Even if the inserted videos were somehow unintentional, Light was sure that there was some underlying test to having him look over the videos. It was the perfect time, right after he officially joined, and the right activity. It looked creditable to the other investigators and it was a good opportunity to see how Kira-like Light’s thought process and insights really were. Light had considered not pointing out the mistaken footage, but that was boring. If L wanted Kira-level intuition, then that is what he would get. 

Speak of the devil. L rolled up in his chair alongside Light without warning, but the brunette didn’t flinch. “Hey, Hideki.” Light greeted, not looking away from the screens. 

“Light.” L returned. “I don’t suppose you’ve found something significant already?” The man asked, glancing at Light’s notes. 

“I have, actually.” Light said, but didn’t expand further. 

“May I inquire as to what that is?” L asked when it became clear Light wasn’t going to volunteer the information. 

“I think some of these deaths weren’t Kira.” He stated, promptly. 

“Oh?” L prompted, his tone unreadable. 

“Mmhm.” Light hummed in agreement. “Kira only kills criminals and all but one of the ones I find questionable weren’t criminals. This last one was a criminal, but our info on him says that he was a heavy smoker and that he exhibited hypertension significantly before he died. It was probably just a heart attack.” 

“Interesting point.” L allowed, glancing over at Light’s notes. Light allowed him to read them in silence, relishing in their close proximity as L stayed leaned into his space. “And so you believe this to just be a health problem in the victim then.” 

“Well, you’re the expert. You tell me.” Light turned to face him. “Can Kira replicate longstanding underlying health problems in his killings?” They both knew the answer to that one and the knowledge hung in the air. 

“No.” L answered, unnecessarily. “All of the most verified deaths related to Kira were sudden and many of the victims appeared to be completely healthy individuals.” 

“I’ll just move these into the ‘Not Kira’ pile then.” Light smirked. “Looks like Kira’s killings aren’t so untraceable, after all.” He allowed. 

“I suppose.” L sounded doubtful. “Although according to the information provided to us by Ms. Misora, Kira can kill in ways other than a heart attack, perhaps even by controlling someone else to murder the person for them. If Kira wanted to kill someone in a way that was virtually untraceable, he could still do it.”

Always have to have the last word, don’t you, L? Good to know you’re using that information, though. Light thought as he smiled. “Good point.” 

~ 🅚 ~

L paused as he took in Light’s easygoing form. His painless agreement to L’s speculations was stumping because he had taken Kira to be someone who was too childish to acquiesce like that. Someone who would rise to any challenge. L kept waiting for that trait to show up in Light, but the boy never seemed to become too prideful. 

L considered Light’s assent that he could still kill someone and make it appear accidental. He decided to push a little more. “I do wonder if you’re planning on doing that, Light.” 

Light’s reaction was immediate. "No!" Light burst out, jolting forward. For a second, the thought flashed through L's mind that Light might actually attack him right here. The second passed and instead, L found both his hands being held in Light's own and Light's serious eyes staring steadily into his own. "I would never do anything to hurt you!"

L…didn't know how to respond to that. In truth, he couldn't even wrench his eyes away from Light's. The way he said that, as if he were making a vow, was so serious. L struggled to tell himself that Light was lying, playing a role, but…he couldn't. His anger at the suggestion was just too explosive.

Maybe it was also the firm grip on his hands as Light held them or the way Light stared directly into his eyes as he said it and continued to do so without averting his eyes…maybe it was his tone of voice, how panicked he sounded at the mention of L getting hurt. How determined Light sounded when he insisted L wasn't in danger with him.

He believed Light. Just like with his recorded conversation with Matsuda, L couldn't convince himself that Light wasn't being genuine and that confused and unnerved him. He very badly wished that Light was lying, because if Light was then he didn't have to deal with the implications of the truth in this circumstance.

He could accept a shallow affection from Light, one that was either entirely faked or otherwise something weak that could be easily extinguished when he got to know the real L. It was not the first time that L found himself thinking that perhaps Light felt something more than that, but this was the first time he couldn't dismiss it. Before he could reason himself out of such a conclusion, but no longer. 

No, L thought heavily as he looked into intense golden eyes that held a tidal wave of emotion. That's no longer the case. 

He trusted his instincts. He had always trusted his instincts, they had helped him with cases numerous times in the past. They were the same instincts that told him that Light was Kira. Light's momentary panic at the mere suggestion of hurting him and the intense look in his golden eyes now…it didn't look feigned. Light being that good of an actor didn't feel to L like as reasonable an assumption now. 

Light was truly upset and L knew why, but it was still difficult to accept. Arguably, Light's entire affectionate side wasn't fitting for Kira. Did this mean that Light wasn't Kira? It didn't make sense for Kira to be upset about L getting hurt. Kira couldn't possibly be attracted to the Detective L. So could he have been..? 

But no, that didn't feel right, either. Light was nearly perfect as Kira. L couldn't look at him without imagining him as the serial killer he was chasing. Light was definitely hiding something and if it wasn't supernatural powers and a stack of bodies, he would be surprised. 

So what's going on here? L pondered. I refuse to believe Light isn't Kira even if the behavior doesn't fit. And…I can no longer convince myself that his feelings are either just a schoolboy crush or part of some elaborate scheme. "I'm sorry, Light. I didn't mean to upset you." L felt numb as he spoke. 

L counted the seconds that passed and then Light visibly calmed. “I’m sorry, that was a bit of an overreaction, wasn’t it? I just really don’t like the idea of you getting hurt.”

L got that. He didn’t understand it in the slightest, but he got it. 

L was willing to do anything, he determined, if he could identify the parameters of Light’s feelings for him. If he could just define this unknown variable. "Would you be willing to join the Kira case if I agreed to date you for the duration of the investigation?" L inquired, his tone devoid of anything that would tell Light whether he was serious or not.

"I refuse." Light said point-blank, his expression turning serious in the blink of an eye. 

"Excuse me?" L's eyes widened, slightly. That hadn’t been expected at all. Shouldn’t Light have jumped at the opportunity? Especially since L hadn’t done anything to encourage his crush up until this point. 

"I refuse to date you under those circumstances." Light reiterated, seriously.

"You mean…you don't wish to date during the investigation?" L checked, tilting his head. 

Light shook his own head in disagreement, making him even more confused. "No, I don't care about dating during the investigation. What I care about is why you're doing it. I don't want to blackmail you into it and I don't want it to be a transaction. I want you to do it because you're starting to like me too…" Light drew off, but he'd said enough. 

Was it possible to understand and not understand something at all at the same time? L hadn't thought so before now, but he was starting to reevaluate that. “I don’t dislike you.” L said. 

…No, it was certainly not a matter of him not liking Light. Light was obviously a very likable young man, but more than that, L remembered how thoughtful Light had been earlier about his socks. Light, in that moment, had genuinely seemed to care about him, even if it was something mundane and that wasn’t an unpleasant feeling. He couldn’t say that anyone besides Watari had ever done something like that for him and even Watari didn’t do it with the softness that Light had. 

On one side, L felt uncertain about the implication that Light had been observing him enough to know that he hated socks. It wasn’t the first time he’d been investigated, but it was the first time he’d been investigated successfully. There were no insignificant details in L’s line of work, so the successfulness of the endeavor wasn’t lessened in the slightest by it only being about his footwear preferences. 

On the other hand, it felt…pleasant?...to be thought about. Watari had been the only one that followed him, who understood his methods and habits. Most didn’t seem to try to understand him. That Light was trying and that he took L’s preferences into consideration…L treated the resulting feelings with caution. 

Light was infuriatingly hard to place and refused to be categorized. Yet, he was quickly becoming the most formidable opponent L had ever faced. One that was strangely prone to defending him and treated him with unfailing kindness and understanding. It was all very confusing if it couldn’t all be written off as an act, but nothing about it dictated that he didn’t like Light. 

“I’m glad you don’t dislike me.” Light smiled softly, before adding, “But that’s not the same as returning my feelings. I don’t want to be asked out like it’s part of a contract.” 

“I understand. Then I won’t make a suggestion like that again. I apologize.” L said. 

“Don’t apologize.” Light shook his head, all good humor now. “I know a little about you now. You'll chase anything down like a bloodhound when you smell even a trace of blood. I like how tenacious you are. And feel free to ask me out again when you start having a crush of your own!” Light gave a playful wink.

Light speaks as if he knows me intimately. He’s correct, as well. L was indeed willing to do anything for a case. Not because of justice, but because he despised losing. Justice was and had always been an excuse. People generally cared an inordinate amount about it, but L wasn't sure if it existed in the form that they liked to believe it did. 

From his experiences dealing with all sorts in the police force and beyond, L found that most individuals wanted to believe in a soft and fluffy kind of justice that made all wrongs right again, but L knew differently. Real justice was something hard and cold that left most people feeling hollow at the end. L had always cared for justice as little as he cared for people's petty feelings; they were of interest to him only as long as they were convenient or important for his job.

Light couldn't know all of that, but L still felt as if Light saw more of him than the others L had encountered. L already knew that Light was incredibly intelligent and also very observant. He had already determined during their first meeting that the other investigators were neither particularly intelligent nor particularly observant, so he wasn't disappointed with their performance so far.

"I appreciate that." L didn't mean that, but he did at least have some amount of social skills. Enough to guess at times what someone would want to hear and use it to manipulate them. Light was usually an exception, unfortunately. "And you are correct in your assumption. Rest assured, Light, I am willing to do anything to complete this case." He meant that to sound as threatening as it sounded. He knew that if there were a blemish on his record, he would obsess over it. 

"You’re an investigator, it’s what you do. I know you probably got your reputation for never failing to crack a case because you’ll do anything to get your criminal." Light said, shrugging.

Once again, Light’s ability to read him was impressive…and worrying. But aloud, he observed, “It seems your father has told you quite a bit about me.” That wasn’t necessarily the case, but L had already determined that something he had heard previously about L had peaked Light’s curiosity and eventually evoked his sentiment. Whatever it was happened before or shortly after the Kira killings started. 

“Your reputation precedes you.” Light quipped, his lips snapping into a quick smirk. “There wasn’t much to tell, to be honest. You keep to yourself a lot and he didn’t talk about you after the killings started.” 

L already knew that. Soichiro Yagami was a man of upstanding moral character and sound judgment, he would know what could and couldn’t be spoken of. Besides that, of the few family dinners the chief had gone to since the investigation had gotten well underway, he rather suspected half of them occurred under surveillance.

“But I look forward to learning even more about you during the investigation.” Light smiled softly, looking at L as if he were the entire world. 

For the first time, L didn’t strictly take that as a threat from Kira. Now, he picked up on the visible - though still entirely baffling - affection underlying it. 

Also for the first time, L wondered if he could really handle Light Yagami.

Chapter Text

Quillsh Wammy thought back to when he'd first adopted L. He'd never legally adopted the boy, but he'd raised him. That pale young child he'd found alone, abandoned in the park by his parents. 

He'd already opened his orphanage for gifted children, Wammy's House, by that point, but he only accepted children who proved themselves to be gifted in some way. The thing that stopped him from just calling the cops and leaving the situation to them was…how calm the boy was. 

Quillsh had seen a great deal of abandoned children in his time and the vast majority of them were a crying mess for hours after they'd been left. The small group who weren't crying and screaming spent all their time in a state of shock, doing nothing and staring off into space. This child was different, though. He wasn't playing in the park, but he also wasn't in shock. Instead, he was crouched near the entrance, drawing in the ground with his finger. He was focused intently on doing this, paying no mind to the surrounding world or how alone he was. 

It was peculiarly composed and Quillsh found himself with the inexplicable feeling that this child was special. He didn't call the police. Instead, he spoke to the child, took him by the hand, and led him back to the orphanage. He would talk to the authorities at a much later date, but he would make sure that he raised the boy there. 

The boy muttered that his name was L during their talk. Quillsh wasn't sure at first if that was actually the boy's name, but he insisted that it was and that his parents taught him how to write out his name. That it was one of the only things they took the time to teach him themselves and that he was used to being left alone for long periods. 

This more than anything convinced Quillsh that he was correct in thinking that there was something special about this boy. For a child so neglected to be displaying such a high quality of speech…

Quillsh brought L into the orphanage and took him to the playroom where there were several other children, both older and probably younger than L. He asked them to keep an eye on L for a moment and left to go get some new clothes for the boy. As he was heading back, he heard several cries of pain and took off at a run back to the room.

There, he saw L standing calmly in the center of the room, the other children all collapsed around him, crying and beaten. L himself looked fine, standing completely untouched and without a hint of exertion. Quillsh had stood frozen in the doorway, staring at the carnage in front of him. 

"Y–you can't do this!" One of the children cried out weakly, lying curled up on the ground and holding their likely broken arm to their chest. 

"Why?" L peered back at the child that spoke. His tone was so mild and unemotional that the question might have seemed genuine. That is, if the corner of his lips weren't twisted up slightly in the hint of a smile. A small smile that spoke only of an unfeeling humor. "What are you going to do? Tell your parents?" He inquired, knowing full well that they could do no such thing.

The cruel question, said with a coldhearted mockery, and the havoc wreaked by this eight year old was the first time Quillsh got a clue about what kind of person this child was. If he kept him, he knew that L would require a lot of time and resources, not to mention dedication, from himself. He would certainly cause trouble, no matter what. He'd thought hard about it, he really had. 

"What happened here?" Quillsh heard himself ask. 

"They were using violence on me, I protected myself." L answered, not looking the least bit afraid. 

"We weren't!" One of the kids cried out, tears running down their face. "We thought he looked lonely so we were only trying to hug him! He's a liar!" Quillsh had a feeling the children were telling the truth and he wasn't quite sure if L even believed they were trying to hurt him or if he just didn't like them for whatever reason. 

But Quillsh would admit to not being a very good man, himself. He was an accomplished inventor and had decided to dedicate his twilight years to furthering his accomplishments by founding an orphanage for abnormally intelligent children. The whole reason he had opened an orphanage and accepted any of these children into it was because they were exceptional in some way and he could use that.

He hadn't the strength to ignore the potential benefits of having this child in his orphanage just because he mistreated the others. He would be willing to overlook L's treatment of the other orphans and dedicate more time and effort to L specifically if he got a larger return on investment than the other orphans could provide. 

He decided that he would try to soften L's rougher habits, but that the others simply would have to learn to avoid L. That would be best for all involved. 

L quickly proved himself to be exceptional beyond anything Quillsh could have imagined and far superior to his peers at the orphanage. Having provided L with several tests at first, L graduated to making requests to Quillsh, who decided to indulge them as a way of measuring the boy's worth. Quillsh watched carefully what L did with any of the things he was provided with. 

Quillsh didn't interfere for some time, but he was nonetheless quick to realize the potential the boy was showing in his activities. Quillsh would be the first to admit that perhaps he had indulged L too much. Within reason, he gave into each and every one of L's requests due to a combination of it being easier to give him what he wanted and interest in seeing what would come of it.

L eventually asked for a computer, so Quillsh got him one. L's eventual response was to start solving crime cold cases. The boy, Quillsh learned, was always looking for challenges. Additionally, L seemed to gravitate towards things that others have proven themselves inadequate at doing, such as solving particular cases. At one point, L even managed to solve a string of bombing cases and narrowly averted world war 3. 

L was special to Quillsh in more ways than just his intellect, although that by far made him the biggest asset. L was the only child that Quillsh had ever adopted himself. Every other child was taken into his orphanage but that was about the extent of it, while L was both Quillsh's ward and his adopted son. Eventually, managing L - his greatest success - became Quillsh’s life. It was his day job and his night job. Enabling L to do his jobs efficiently and taking care of whatever needs or dirty jobs he needed done. 

He had tried to recreate his success with L with other children in the orphanage and L eventually showed some interest in having a successor. Quillsh saw some success with them, but he could never quite recreate L. What happened with B and A was an unmitigated disaster…quite unfortunate. The harsh expectations and teaching methods wore down on many children mentally, but it was for a purpose. However, they had some decently worthy successors for L, so it seemed the experiments were worth it. 

L's nature and Quillsh's indulgence led to L having little to no social interaction outside of himself. His time at Wammy's House he spent holed up alone in his room and that didn't change as he got older. L had never had a friend and he'd never had a romantic partner. Indeed, L had never shown any sexual interest at all towards another individual. Even his hormonal teenage phase was understated for a boy his age. And as for a long-term relationship, L had never been adequate at responding properly to other people's feelings or holding ordinary conversation on ordinary topics.

All that to say, Quillsh felt he wasn't prepared to handle this particular situation. Someone showing apparently genuine interest in L in a way that his ward couldn't ignore. Of all the preparations Quillsh had made for his son’s future, this was not one of them. In truth, none of the children from Wammy’s house were expected to have significant others or children of their own. Actually, it was the opposite. Being isolated from others allowed one to be more productive and relationships were a distraction, more often than not. 

They weren’t taught not to have families, but being orphans and growing up in a competitive environment where objective success mattered more than anything else…almost every one of them came to the belief that they shouldn’t form attachments. L was no different in that regard. He had never had a strong relationship with anyone and if he had, Quillsh would be the one that knew about it. 

B and A had the strongest relationship among the children at Wammy’s and that didn’t end up being the best thing. They were also the most promising candidates out of Wammy’s, but well…

Quillsh - going by the name of Watari for now - watched through the cameras as L and Light Yagami failed to realize they were still holding hands. The two were staring each other in the eyes, not saying a thing, while the other investigators looked like they didn’t know what to do about. Watari didn’t know the last time he had seen L look so off-balance. It seemed this investigation had been trying for him in several different ways. 

Light Yagami was an enigma, Kira or not. The boy seemed to be an old soul in a young body, mature and collected throughout the ordeals of the Kira case. In that way, he seemed to adhere to his father's account of him. It was in his behavior towards L that he differed. The boy - from the very beginning, it appears - had a very strong interest in L and he made no secret of the nature of that interest. 

This was…a situation and Watari wasn't sure whether it was a problem or not. Ordinarily, he assisted L with anything he needed but let L decide when he needed it. This time…he wasn't sure if he should step in at all. In the area of interpersonal relationships, Watari may have failed L, but Light seemed to be doing his damnedest to rewrite that. Unlike his child, he wasn’t sure this was a bad thing at all. 

He’d have to wait and see how it developed. 

~ 🅚 ~

Once again, Light was practically fawning over Matsuda. It appeared that no act was too small for Light when it came to that man, anything was worthy of praise. And Light absolutely lavished him with it. If Matsuda came to an obvious conclusion, it was rewarded. Any compliment he gave Light was reflected back with double the intensity. This had been going on for hours. 

He had long since started getting annoyed with the way the two were acting and he couldn’t put his finger on why; he just was. He scowled harder whenever Light leaned in closer to Matsuda to whisper to him. One would think it was Matsuda that Light has a crush on, L noted with irritation as he glowered at the pair happily chatting on the couch. 

L was used to being mildly irritated by the incompetence of others, but this wasn’t quite the same feeling. On top of that, he wasn’t used to feeling like there were things he couldn’t do. Anything those morons could do, he surely could. Anything he couldn’t do wasn’t worth the effort. But now a thought swirled in his head like a vicious, sharp blade as he watched this go down. L couldn't talk as freely and excitedly to Light as Matsuda could. Matsuda, for all his flaws and failings - of which he had many - spoke without reserve and didn't seem to have trouble finding the words to say what he wanted to say. 

L…has never been good at talking to people on their level. Speaking… recreationally . He was able to give his rationale and reasoning as well as describe his plans, even if they were heavily redacted, but when it came to charming people…

L felt something similar to resentment - but not quite - curling in his gut, directed at Matsuda. The man was a complete fool, eager to please like a puppy, and completely useless for anything other than fetching coffee. Why was it that he had such an ease with speaking when L was more accomplished in every way and yet he struggled with the complexities of social interactions? Dealing with others still baffled him more than otherwise, so why did this utter moron find it so easy? 

And why would Light have such an interest in him? L had always known that he had difficulty with social situations, it was a large reason why he preferred not to deal with people directly, but this was the first time it bothered him. Usually, social interaction was an annoyance that had nothing to be gained from and so L didn't concern himself with it. Now, however, as he watched Light smile brightly at Matsuda, the two leaning close to each other to talk excitedly about some show…L wished he knew how to do that. 

To ramble on for minutes about some meaningless TV show or movie, compare pop idols or some other such thing. Even though L did have an interest in pop idols too, he wouldn’t be able to act the way these two did over it. To laugh and smile and gush about it. He couldn't talk carelessly the same way they were now and Light was talking to Matsuda about things he would never say to L. That thought irked him even as he told himself that he didn't have the time to listen to such pointless gossip in the first place. 

L wheeled his chair around so that he was facing his computer setup, his back to them. I should be glad he's not rambling to me about all of that. Matsuda is making himself useful by soaking it up like a sponge. It's illogical to be upset about it. L tried to distract himself from his irritation by working. It wasn’t like he expected either Matuda or Light to actually be productive to the case, so it really shouldn’t bother him what they were going on about. Matsuda was an idiot and Light was Kira, so the case could hinge on neither doing their jobs. 

He was probably just bothered by how strange Light’s interest in Matsuda was. How nonsensically it seemed, coming out of nowhere, especially with the two not seeming to know each other beforehand. Still, if Light - as Kira - was trying to recruit Matsuda of all people, then he could go right ahead. L told himself that he should just focus on his work and figure out how to get Light to slip and expose himself as Kira instead of just a mooning teenager. If Light got closer to Matsuda, that might even work in his favor. So what if Light’s fixation on Matsuda seemed strange? He should just ignore what was going on. He should just ignore… ignore…

Finally, he could take it no longer. "Mr. Matsuda." L said, not looking away from his monitor. 

"Yes, Ryuzaki?" Matsuda's excited voice hurriedly replied. 

"I have need of your services. Could you please report to Watari for instructions?" At the same time as he was speaking, he was typing up a message to Watari, instructing him to give Matsuda busy work to keep him occupied for some time. Matsuda's deep desire to please was written all over his face, he would jump at the chance to be useful for something other than getting coffee or making copies.

"Really? I'll be right there!" Matsuda exclaimed loudly, audibly jumping up from his seat. 

"I'll help." Light surprisingly added, getting up from his seat much more calmly. 

Absolutely not. Light was his prime suspect, he couldn't just be allowed to traipse around without L to observe his behavior. "I'm afraid you're needed here." L cut in. "I'm sure that Mr. Matsuda will be fine on his own and Watari will take care of him." Light looked at L like he didn’t believe him. 

"Don't worry, Light. I can handle it, don't worry. I won't let you guys down!" Matsuda said and L caught sight of the man putting his hand on Light's shoulder in a comforting manner. His irritation flared stronger, not in the least helped by the fact that Light actually seemed to accept his words where he didn’t accept L’s. 

“Alright, then. If you’re sure.” Light hesitantly replied, giving Matsuda a smile. Matsuda left with a great deal of excitement, slamming the door behind him. A second passed and then the door opened again. 

Matusda stuck his nervous and embarrassed head back into the room. “Uh, excuse me? Which room is Watari in right now?” L told him and Matsuda gave a laugh and a word of thanks before closing the door again. 

L waited a few more moments and then dedicated to take advantage of this opportunity he’d gotten. “Light. Please come over and sit next to me, if you would. I have something to discuss with you.” 

“Surely Light can work over here.” Soichiro Yagami spoke up, from his spot a little further away. His statement would have come across as casual except for the look on his face. Wariness and displeasure. 

Ah, yes. That bit of uncomfortableness. A few hours back, when Light held his hands and professed his intent to never hurt him, L had gotten lost in the moment and his own thoughts. When one of the investigators finally interfered and brought both of them back to the situation at hand, it was already too late. All of the JPD members in the room had heard what Light had yelled and more importantly, seen them holding hands. They already knew about Light’s crush on L and that incident made it clear to L how much the situation disturbed them. 

He could understand. Light was younger than him and a suspect in the case. He was the son of their beloved chief and a very lovable boy on his own. He had a crush on L that was well known and now he was spending time with said crush. And they thought L was morally challenged. 

So yes, he understood. But it was still very annoyed by it because Soichiro had taken to eyeing L with suspicion. He’d already done that, but his investment in his job and the case had kept it at a minimum before. Now, the incident with his son was making it rise back up again. 

“It’s fine, Dad.” Light thankfully intervened, shooting the older man a smile before going to settle down in the chair next to him. “So what did you want to talk about?” He asked L. 

L hummed. What did he want to talk about? “What’s your interest in Mr. Matsuda?” He wasn’t sure that was what he intended to say, but it was too late now. He had to stick with it. 

“Touta?” Light blinked, surprised by the topic. 

Something dark and sharp lanced through L’s chest. Touta? Touta. Matsuda’s first name and Light was using it. Why was Light so irritating? It was the boy’s specialty. “Touta. You two seem unusually close. It was my understanding that you two didn’t know each other before this case.” He probed. 

“We didn’t.” Light replied, a curiously confused look in his eyes. Slowly, it spread to the rest of his expression as he stared at L. 

L shifted uncomfortably but endeavored to ignore. “Then may I ask why you two seem so close now?” 

“Well, Touta is very friendly.” Light started, his intrigued gaze not wavering from L. “And I just really like him. I can’t say why, exactly. I think we’ll be good friends.” 

Touta. Every time Light used the man’s first name, it was like another blade of annoyance was being shoved through his back. “I see.” He didn’t say more and he was pretty sure that no emotion showed through his voice and yet it was this very statement that made Light’s expression clear up a little with understanding. 

“Wait…was that? Are you…” Light appeared to work through something and stopped talking. “It’s nothing. What are you working on right now?” 

What was he working on right now? L glanced surreptitiously back at his primary monitor. Light’s school record was on his screen. L’s fingers flew across the keyboard and pulled up a different screen, utterly refusing to look at Light to see if he saw it. What did he just pull up? Light’s meeting with Naomi. Flick, click. New window. A documentation of Light’s various visits to the police department preceding it. Oh, for the love of--!

“You research me a lot.” Light said with a shit-eating grin, not sounding the least bit surprised as he peered over L’s shoulder. 

L felt his eye twitch. “You were a suspect, I was just doing my job.” He stated. 

“And am I still a suspect?” Light inquired, leaning closer. 

“...” L felt that whatever he said, Light wouldn't believe it. Just as well. Whatever he said was going to be a lie. “It’s a 4% chance that you’re Kira.” 

“Oh, I’m sure.” Light smirked.

“You don’t believe me.” L stated. 

“You’re right, I don’t.” Light acknowledged, still smiling. “I think you’re a liar.” 

“Hmm.” L hummed, pressing a thumb to his lips to prevent the smile. Light was strangely good at saying things that should be insults in the least insulting tone possible. 

When L didn’t say anything else, Light took the initiative. “Do you think I’m a liar?” 

Yes. “Maybe. Are you lying about something?” L asked, not expecting an honest answer. 

“Many things.” Light replied, easily. “I try to be truthful when I can, though. I think you’re lying about a lot of things, too. Not just how much you suspect me.” 

“What else do you think I’m lying about?” L stared at him. 

“I think you’re lying to people about why you’re trying to catch Kira.” Light pondered, aloud. “Or at least deceiving them.” 

L blinked in surprise. That wasn’t what he expected Light to say. “Why I’m doing it?” L pressed. 

“Uh huh.” Light leaned even closer, their faces nearly touching as he brought his voice down to a whisper. From this distance, L could feel Light’s breath on his cheeks and see that smirk still on the boy’s lips. “You say you’re all about justice, but I don’t think you are. I think you lie every time you say you care about right and wrong.” 

Something creeped up L’s spine at Light’s words mixed with the brunette’s obvious enjoyment. The feeling of someone stepping on his grave came to mind, but in reality, it was probably just Light getting dangerously close to something. 

“What makes you say that?” L investigated. 

“Just a feeling I get, but I have good judgment about these things.” Light said. 

“And what do you feel that I actually care about?” L asked, with some pique. 

Light lifted a finger and pointed directly at L’s chest. “Yourself and your own interests. Letting people know how smart you are and finding entertainment to keep life from being so boring for you.” 

How does Light always read me so well? L’s hand clenched tightly onto his chair. “Did you know that feeling?” He wanted to deny the assertion, but he wanted to know the answer to that question more. 

“I did, once.” Light’s smile became less sharp as he said this. “But where you and I are different is that when I say I’m looking for justice, I mean it.” 

Yes, Light and Kira both seem to really believe in a kind of justice. That, L felt comfortable labeling as truthful. “Maybe that’s the case.” L allowed a little bit. “If it is true, would that change how you feel?” He felt uncomfortable directly talking about Light’s crush. 

“Nope.” Light smiled brightly. “Not in the slightest. If anything, it makes me like you more.” 

L startled. …what on Earth? WHY? “I don’t think many people would agree with that.” He managed to say, sounding calmer than his thoughts were. 

“Probably not, but I’m not like most people.” Light replied. With one more smile, he leaned back and returned his attention to L’s computer screen as if nothing had happened. Light reached out and began typing and clicking around on the screen as if the computer were his own. 

L just watched him, finding everything that was Light Yagami perplexing.

Chapter Text

Light didn’t know how long L watched him work before he spoke up again. “Light, may I ask you a question?” 

“Of course.” Light stopped working and gave him a smile. “What kind of person do you think Kira is?” 

Light’s lips twisted up sardonically. “Are you asking me that as an investigator or a supporter of Kira?” 

“Either. I want to know your whole mind about Kira. I’m interested in knowing what causes someone so intelligent and law-abiding to favor Kira over the law.” L stated. 

Buttering me up, huh? Light considered his answer shortly. “I guess the short answer is that I believe in Kira.” Light admitted, making sure to keep his voice low so that the others in the room wouldn’t hear it. 

If L hadn’t told anyone about Light admitting to being a Kira supporter yet, then Light certainly wasn’t going to do it. "As for the kind of person I think they are…I think that Kira is someone who's willing to go to or past the edge of conventional morality to try and help people. Someone who doesn't view the world in black and white. Someone works to help as many people as possible rather than trying to change how people are ." 

"I see…that's quite the speech." L hummed, pausing for a moment. "And this assessment has led to you believing in Kira?” He prompted, leaning forward. 

“I’m not going to say that Kira’s way is the only way or that killing serious criminals is the absolute answer to the problems of society, because I don’t think either of those things.” Light sighed. “But I think that it’s a solid method that saves a lot of people.”

“Even though it also kills a lot of people?” L interjected. "Some of which may be innocent?"

“I don’t…” Light seriously considered not responding to this question honestly, but knowing the conversation was still just between him and L for the moment, he felt the strong urge to be genuine here. “I am not someone who views all lives as being equal. I've never been. I’m prepared to see significant differences in people depending on who I’m looking at.” 

“...I’m surprised to hear you say so. It’s not something many people would admit to.” L said. 

“Maybe so. It’s certainly a loaded statement and a career killer in law enforcement.” Light acknowledged. “But it’s how I really feel. I don’t think all lives are equal. That isn’t the same as saying that some lives are meaningless, just that there’s a scale that I use to judge their worth in comparison to others. It’s not something that people like to admit to because it makes them sound and feel like they are evil or coldhearted. It’s not the neat or clean morality of judging everyone equally, but the world isn’t neat or clean, is it?” 

L didn’t move to answer so Light continued. “This scale has endless variations. Is a criminal’s life more important than a police officer’s? That’s one of the easiest, but some questions are harder to answer: Is a pregnant woman’s life worth more than a teenager’s? These questions are hard to answer but life forces people to make choices like that in one way or another. 

Maybe an officer hesitates to shoot an escaping criminal goes on to kill another officer or maybe the law fails to punish a wife beater sufficiently and eventually that individual murders their spouse. In those and many other situations, one life comes at the expense of another, even if the individual refuses to choose. If a paramedic only has time to save one of two very injured people and refuses to choose one over the other, they both die. So do they let both die or do they save one, since both people dying only heightens the tragedy and helps no one? If they do save one, how do they choose which, assuming both are injured enough to die before being helped second? They scale. In my mind, refusing to choose between people is in itself a choice that has consequences.” 

“I see what you mean.” L pondered, aloud. He, too, kept his voice low. “The world will force a choice whether the person considers themselves to have made a choice or not. And you’re saying that you hate indecisive people.” 

“Hate is a strong word. By taking charge of our opportunity to make decisions instead of avoiding them, we have the chance to avoid a worse outcome.” Light said. “It’s more accurate to say that I’m irritated by them. I don’t think that you can change reality by conviction alone. Try as you might to argue otherwise, the sky is still blue. You can’t forcefully change it to be something else by denying the reality. In the same way, I don’t think insisting narrowly that all lives are absolutely equal to each other makes it true. Or that we don't have to choose. While I can appreciate the morality behind seeing all life as equal and I absolutely disagree with judging people’s lives as superior because of their ethnicity, sex, or income, I think that it is deeply insulting to insinuate that a schoolteacher’s life matters as much as a rapist. Insulting and actively problematic when it comes to preventing crime.” 

“And that’s why you support Kira.” L concluded. “He’s decisive and he judges criminal lives to be less than those who haven’t committed crimes.” 

“Broadly, yes. I don’t think the current legal systems are completely awful, but I don’t believe in them nearly as strongly. I don’t feel like the legal system’s general response of imprisoning people for a few years and then regurgitating them back out prevents many crimes, a lot of repeat offenders have been let out only to commit more crimes. Even life imprisonment creates problems, even though it avoids the repeat offender problem. And of course, that’s only if a jury can be convinced of the person’s guilt or if they become convinced of the right person’s guilt. It's easy for people with money and influence to skate by or even hide serious crimes. The system gets bogged down by it all and I feel like it’s slow and ineffective.” 

Light huffed out a laugh. “And then Kira comes along and they are able to cast judgment efficiently without long-winded arguments from high-paid lawyers or drawn-out court cases and it feels like a breath of fresh air. No worries that someone is going to escape justice because their lawyer poked holes in the case against them or because they went on the run and ran to a country that doesn’t extradite.” 

“And without accountability.” L pointed out. “Judgements made by a fallible human being who can be biased or make false judgements and yet doesn’t answer to anyone. There’s no information available on how Kira judges the seriousness of someone’s crimes or how he determines their guilt and there’s no way to hold them accountable for their actions when no one knows who they are.” 

“You’re completely right.” Light admitted, to L’s visible surprise. “What?” Light asked upon seeing the expression, though it was a front. He knew what . 

“I admit I didn’t expect you to agree so easily, especially since you support Kira.” L responded. 

“Oh, I see that.” Light nodded. “But just because I support Kira doesn’t mean I don’t acknowledge any of the flaws in their system or their ways of doing things. Supporting someone doesn’t mean you think them flawless.” 

“I suppose that’s true.” L pondered, quietly. He still didn’t look like he liked it. 

“Both sides have problems. The traditional law in many countries has lots of holes exploited by those with connections, doesn't act as a deterrent like it should, and suffers from the downsides of needing a group of people to agree on a verdict. While Kira casts unfettered judgement on people remotely, knowing no limits while being beholden to no one.” Light pondered. “But Kira isn’t hurting anyone without a serious criminal record and they are getting results.” And he was. It wasn’t as dramatic as it was near the end of his reign in his previous life, but as he had predicted, crime rates had fallen dramatically as a result of the Kira killings becoming public knowledge. 

Which was the whole point. Kira deterred violent crime because criminals were scared out of their mind about a supernaturally powered killer of criminals that was nameless and faceless. Light had the power to investigate and take out those who instigated violent crime, but his only power to deter said crime from occurring in the first place came from how frightened he could make people of being caught breaking the law. It was a level of fear that the police and law enforcement in general can't command unless they're operated by a dictator, which was not really preferable. If he lost the fear factor, then the crime rate wouldn’t drop that much. 

The fact of the matter was that he made them absolutely terrified. Heck, he even scared law enforcement and he hadn’t even needed to kill the FBI agents to do it! The general public was an exception, but they were something else entirely…

“Kira hasn’t killed anyone innocent yet .” L corrected him. "And that's only officially. Appeals are happening more and more often these days."

“You can’t judge someone based on something they haven’t even done yet .” Light parried with, feeling deeply the truth of it. “Disliking someone for what they could do instead of what they have done isn’t very logical.” He teased, lightly. 

"You're avoiding the issue of there being unknown innocents in Kira's killing spree." L pressed.

"Well, that's part of what's hard about it. Because there could be." Light answered honestly. "Just like in conventional law enforcement, innocent people are convinced and some of them die. It's nearly impossible to avoid. I'm not going to call it a necessary sacrifice, but what I am going to say is that if someone is too paralyzed with indecision for fear of making a mistake in a conviction to do anything, they'll do nothing and people will still suffer. Clearly conventional law enforcement has already decided that if you try to be careful, the risk is worth the reward. Maybe Kira decided that too."

L’s lips tugged further into a frown, seemingly irritated. “Kira has every reason to escalate their behavior in the future, I won't simply take it on faith that they won't. They have every reason to target lesser criminals or law enforcement officers in the future. The police won’t stop until they catch them. If Kira wants to continue, they’ll eventually need to lash out at law enforcement.”

“Will he?” Light gave a serene smile. 

With some good humor, Light recalled how the world governments actually gave into him pretty quickly in the first timeline. First, it was the US government pulling back after their FBI agents were killed, not wanting to risk any more of their people’s lives carelessly. Then there were the JPD officers initially assigned to the taskforce walking out en masse…then the higher-ups in general deciding that they’d rather L show up on TV and be killed than any of them after the Second Kira entered stage left. 

The world governments sending him names after L died…the US President being blackmailed and refusing to help Near…

Light certainly was prepared to not get arrogant again and underestimate the world governments, but he would really have to disagree with L about how determined they were to stand up against him. They weren’t all L. The task force members were special for a reason, even without being geniuses. For all of L’s self-interested actions, he had been willing to die in the course of his investigation in a way that few others were. 

“Maybe Kira is determined not to hurt people if they don’t think they deserve it, even if they are determined to run the risk of being captured.” Light offered. 

L hummed as he took a moment to mull that over. “Kira does seem to view himself as a benevolent God.” He said, glancing significantly at Light as he said it. 

“God?” Light jerked, blinking at him. He’d called himself nothing of the sort! Not this time, anyway…

“Do you not think Kira a God of justice?” L peered at him, calculating. 

“I never said I did.” Light insisted. “Kira’s probably just a person. A person with strange abilities, but a person.” 

L’s expression went more neutral than normal, which made him think that L didn’t know what to make of his proclamation and didn’t want to show it. “I see. I had assumed you viewed them in that way because I have become aware of much of Kira’s fanbase saying so online. Many believe him to be some kind of god, here to save our world.” The slight derision in L’s tone made it clear exactly what he thought of that. 

“Well, that’s them. Other people can think whatever they want, but I don’t think that way.” The fact that he was actually a God of Death was absolutely not the point right now. L was definitely trying to imply he thought Kira saw himself as a God. It’s probably because the level to which I publicized my acts makes me look like an attention whore, Light considered. 

“I apologize for making assumptions about you.” L apologized. 

You don’t mean that. Light smiled brightly. “It’s okay, it happens. But what was it you were saying about Kira seeing himself as benevolent?” 

“Kira seems to think he’s a virtuous person, despite what he’s done. Kira seems to have lofty ideas about good and bad.” L responded. 

What is he getting at now? “Are you calling Kira dramatic?” Light checked. It would be funny, if he was. Especially because he could imagine it being true. 

“Maybe.” L replied, a small quirk to his lips, revealing his humor at Light’s question. “Just that Kira makes a show of how good he is.” 

Light recalled something. “His nobility , you mean?” 

"You're referring to what I said during my first confrontation with Kira.” L noted. “I hadn’t realized that you watched that.” 

“I did!” Light admitted, easily. “And even if I hadn’t, I would have still found out about it at school. Everybody knows about it and for a while, it was the only thing anyone would talk about.” 

“Yes, I can see how that would be the case.” L nodded along. 

“The context and your tone of voice when you commented on Kira’s nobility made it clear you didn’t view it highly. Others might think you meant that you don’t believe Kira to be noble at all, but I think the more prevalent element might be something else. I wondered at the time if maybe it wasn’t that you didn’t believe Kira wasn’t noble - unlike the majority of the JPD - but that you simply look down on any nobility that they may or may not have.” Light cocked his head to the side as he stared back at L, not unlike L’s own staring. Light thought that L looked surprised at his pronouncement, but it was a little hard to tell.

L didn’t respond at first, but then interest faintly lit up his eyes. “Maybe. I will make an admission…” He started and Light found himself growing excited, in turn. “I believe sentiment to be one of Kira’s weaknesses.” 

Light’s lips twitched and he struggled to prevent a full-blown smile from breaking out. He never would’ve thought he’d hear someone list one of a serial killer’s flaws as caring too much . “You do, huh? That’s a really weird thing to say, Hideki.” 

“Maybe so.” L allowed. Light wasn’t sure at all whether or not L was convinced that Light’s noble streak was genuine and not just an act to gain public sentiment. “But does Kira really expect nobility and honor to get him very far?” L looked challengingly at Light while he said it. 

“You’re talking about Kira possibly choosing to not kill you back then instead of being unable to do so.” Light stated, looking right back. 

L’s lips tugged into a small smile. “It’s a mistake they will regret making. That is, assuming that it was indeed intentional. I believe it’s more likely that Kira simply couldn’t kill me, since we know they need a name and a face to kill and they had neither at the time.” 

Ah, there’s some annoyance there, isn’t there, L? Light crooned, mentally. His quick mind immediately picked up the hints of feelings that L was giving off. You’re oscillating between wondering if Kira let you live or if they tried to but couldn’t kill you, with an understandable slant towards the latter. But not knowing and not being able to prove either conclusion is like a thorn in your side, an annoying twinge that you can’t remove. 

“So you were mocking Kira, just in case they let you live because you think it’s a weakness not to kill your enemies without hesitation.” Light summarized, concisely. “But it’s only a consideration. You still think the situation was that Kira couldn’t kill you because you hadn’t met the supposed requirements Kira needs for killing?”

“It seems you understand the situation clearly. This is precisely why I was so eager for you to join the case. Your attention to detail and quick apprehension for circumstances makes you invaluable.” L said, once more clearly trying to play to Light’s ego. 

Stroking my ego didn’t work in my previous life, even when my ego was out of control. It’s certainly not going to work now, Light thought with amusement. “Thank you, Hideki. That means a lot coming from you. Still, I can’t help but find the situation a little funny.” 

“Hm?” L cocked his head slightly to the side. “And what, may I ask, do you think funny?” 

“Mocking Kira for their sentiment, advocating killing or otherwise ruining your rivals without hesitation…You sound like a storybook villain.” Light closed his eyes and gave a bright laugh. 

“Is that supposed to be an insult?” L inquired tonelessly. 

Light’s eyelids slid back open and his golden orbs gazed back at L softly, fondly. “Not at all. Not at all.”

~ 🅚 ~

Naomi didn't know what to think about what was going on between L and Light. In truth, she didn't know L very well at all. She'd briefly worked with him on a case in LA, but she knew next to nothing about him. Having said that, she didn't know what to make of his relationship with Light. When she'd joined the investigation, L had insisted that Light was just a suspect and only as a precaution. 

That had never rang true to her, though she couldn't imagine why he would lie about it until she recalled that Light's father was part of the investigation and the police chief, to boot. She glanced at the man in question out of the corner of her eye. But now she saw it clearly, though she didn’t think L did. 

She saw the way L was always aware of what Light was doing and the way he took secretive glances at Light when the boy wasn’t looking. His apparent desire to have Light physically near him and his obsession with Light being Kira despite all evidence to the contrary. It was easy for her to close her eyes and remember some of those behaviors as her own when she began getting close to her fiance. She’d done a few of those things when she started liking him and she’d caught him doing it too. Maybe it was this personal experience talking, but it seemed obvious to her that L was coming dangerously close to returning Light’s unprofessional interest. 

…It was probably her personal experience. The other investigators didn’t seem to pick up on this nuance at all. The others took for granted that L’s obsession with Light was entirely based on his being Kira without returning any feelings, with the exception of Light’s father, who definitely looked like he suspected something on L’s end. He was clearly doing his best to repress such suspicions, but the looks he gave L when the man got too close to his son said something. 

How anyone could misinterpret that scene where they held hands and stared into each other’s eyes, I’ll never know… Naomi shook her head. She didn’t know what to make of this strange relationship developing between the two. In all of her experience with the law, the relationship between investigator and criminal (or suspect) was a relatively uncomplicated one. The two wouldn’t know each other personally, the investigator would investigate them while maintaining emotional distance and observing the laws and rules of conduct, and the suspect would attempt to look innocent (or be innocent, as the case may be). 

You often get the dangerous situation where a guilty suspect tries to run or kill the person investigating them. It was far from the rosy, heart-filled aura surrounding the two now and it made their relationship unbelievable with their current roles. She’d also quickly heard of Light’s infamous declaration of a crush on L. The investigators were quick to inform her about it as it had apparently made its rounds around the small group several times. Naturally, Light’s known feelings for L made things uncomfortable and complicated. 

Not that she blamed a thing on Light! The boy was young - just entered college - and it wasn’t unusual in the slightest for young adults to form crushes on more mature adults that they find admirable or impressive. She herself had formed a few shallow crushes on some of her superiors at work when she was younger; wearing the rose-tinted glasses of someone young without experience. 

What she wasn't sure of was whether or not she should blame L for this. Normally, she wouldn't hesitate to saddle him with being the responsible one. L was the elder of the two and he was the one in a position of power, so it made sense. Even if Light was the one with the crush and he was the one who was being forward, someone in L's position had to draw a clear line with set boundaries to keep things moral and professional. What she had just seen was most certainly not that.

The reason why she hesitated to judge L on it so harshly was…well, because Light's feelings seemed to floor him. According to her, L was almost as blank as a wall. It was when Light showed an interest in him that she could actually get a read on his emotions and she attributed that to how shaken he was by the situation. Naomi could understand why L wouldn't be as clear-cut and logical about it, given that. 

In part, she felt bad for Light. He was such a generous and kind person while also being clever, which was why she felt sorry that his crush on L couldn’t really go anywhere. As with many crushes on authority figures, time and reality would have to force those feelings to fade impotently into the ether. However, the rest of her felt uncomfortable with the situation as a whole, as she was sure that her more senior investigators also were. 

Having an investigator that was the target of a crush from their “lead suspect” brought ethical questions. 

Having said suspect also be the target of 24/7 surveillance that offered them no privacy brought ethical questions. 

Having said suspect work on the investigation brought ethical questions . 

And having the investigator who was being crushed on both work with the emotional suspect and do basically nothing to deter such feelings in the suspect made the whole thing feel much worse. 

She was quite glad - and relieved - that Light had been extracted from L a short while ago. It allowed them all the chance to breathe a little bit. Poor Mr. Yagami…he’d managed to keep himself together admirably, given the stressful situation, but he’d been approaching his limit. When they’d noticed that L and Light’s hushed conversation had lulled and they were just sitting quietly next to each other, the chief took the opportunity to pull his son away from the detective. 

Thankfully, he’d continued to hold himself together like a true professional as he inserted himself between them and gently dragged his son away to the other side of the room. She wouldn’t exactly give him points for subtlety, but she didn’t think what he was doing was overtly obvious. Well, at least not obvious for the people who weren’t already thinking the same thing he was. She wished she could thank the chief of the JPD for his daring move, it allowed them all to ignore the ethical issues in this investigation for at least a few hours longer. 

Everyone here besides the aforementioned investigator and suspect duo had official positions in law enforcement, positions which relied heavily upon maintaining high moral and legal disciplines. No one here felt comfortable with the situation and all had voiced discontent early on, but there was nothing they could do about it. L was calling the shots here. In her mind, though, she preoccupied herself with coming up with ways that she could interfere if things on that front became too much. 

L could justify whatever he wanted to them by insisting that his methods would get them closer to catching Kira, but Naomi didn’t believe that Light was Kira or that he knew anything about the serial killer. Light hadn’t done a single suspicious thing and he hadn’t hurt anybody, he was just a sweet boy trying to make the world a better place and for some unfathomable reason, L had honed in on him. She could tell he still suspected him, whatever L might’ve said to the contrary. More than anything else, Naomi’s own instincts said to trust him. Naomi had always trusted her instincts above facts, despite intrusive advice both from coworkers and fiancees. They denounced it as “women’s intuition” or being emotional and didn’t try to hide how little they thought of it, but she was right more often than not. Even back when she had first met him, Light hadn’t felt to her like someone who wanted to harm her. She had never once felt unsafe or in danger when she was with him and that belief in him had paid off! She might not have been able to meet L or even have gotten her fiance back if it wasn’t for Light. 

She was so incredibly grateful to Light and she looked forward to the day that she could repay even a fraction of what he had done for her. 

She respected L for his intelligence and his acumen, but he was wrong about Light. 

Why couldn’t he see that? 

~ 🅚 ~

Light didn’t say anything when Touta found his way back to the investigation room later in the afternoon. Unusually for him, he decided not to rock this particular boat for Touta’s sake. L getting rid of him earlier had come off as strange, but his later realization made sense out of it. 

While he still didn’t completely understand why, he was detecting more than a hint of jealousy from L and apparently the man was taking it out on Touta. Not too noticeably yet, but still. But in appeared that L couldn’t keep the other man away forever unless he wanted to invent a whole other case for Touta to work on. Unaware of Light’s revelation, Touta immediately took up the empty seat next to Light upon returning. Light thought he heard a low growl coming from L’s spot but no one else seemed to pay attention to it. 

Touta - poor, sweet summer child that he was - just leaned over towards Light and excitedly asked him what he was working on and if he could help. 

“Didn’t you get all the helping out of your system with Watari?” Light smiled at him to show him he was only joking. 

“Not really.” Touta rubbed the back of his head. “Not that I’m complaining or anything! Just…after a while…the tasks felt like he was trying to keep me busy.” 

So I was right that L was pulling something, there. Light thought. “Well, you can definitely join me, then. L’s checking my work now about all the notes I made on the known Kira videos. I’m not doing much while I wait.” Touta was happy nonetheless and delved into the work while Light showed him what he was working on. 

As they worked quietly, Light’s mind started drifting. He was pretty bored with what they were working on and he was sure that L would scrutinize it anyway. It was during this drifting that he thought of something. Quickly glancing around to see if anyone was close enough to overhear them, Light leaned in and started whispering in Touta’s ear, causing the inattentive man to jump a little in his seat. “Hey, Touta?”

“Yeah, Light?” Matsu looked up from his work with an open expression, eager to please, as always. 

“I was just wondering…why did you join the Kira Case?” Light suspected that he knew the general idea of why, but he wanted to start the conversation. 

“Why?” Matsuda looked surprised to be asked. “Because…I took this job to protect people, I signed up for that with my job, so that’s what I’m doing. And well…I’d follow your father anywhere.” He added, bashfully. 

Light took that in. It was such a Matsuda answer. He took his job more seriously than most people gave him credit for. Light smiled and leaned in, conspiratorially. “You know L suspected me of being Kira, right? What do you think of them?” 

Matsuda, who had leaned in too, now leaned back in surprise. “About who? Kira?” Light nodded, his smile never dropping. “Well…I…” Matsu glanced unsurely around the room, but no one was paying attention to their whispered conversation. Well, except for L. He was over in his seat making a good act of not watching their every move. 

Matsu didn’t notice and, seemingly satisfied enough that everyone was ignoring them, dropping his voice a little as he replied. “I hope you know that I would never think you were Kira and I don’t want to offend you or anyone else who’s risking their lives to find Kira with my opinions.” He started, nervously. 

“It’s okay. Tell me what you think.” Light assured him, with a serene smile. “I’ll never think less of you for being yourself.” 

Touta stared at him with wide eyes at his proclamation. It seemed to make him a little embarrassed, but happy. “I think…well, sometimes I think Kira can’t be all bad, you know?” He phrased it more as a question, glancing nervously at Light. 

Light made sure to keep his expression open and understanding. Any hint of disapproval at what he said would make Touta nervously backtrack. He knew from experience. “I don’t know. What do you think?” 

“Well…” Touta glanced around, nervously. “I--I think Kira’s heart might be in the right place. And if they’re trying to help, doesn’t that mean that they’re at least trying to be a good guy?” 

“Well, they are only targeting criminals.” Light pretended to think about it. “It seems more likely than anything else that they’re trying to improve society. Either that or they have a bone to pick.” 

“What do you mean?” Touta asked him. “Bone to pick?”

“Well, their targeting of criminals could also be a personal distaste or a revenge thing for something that happened to them in the past. Maybe they or someone they care about had been a victim of violent crime in the past and maybe that’s why they’re doing it.”

“I didn’t think about that, but that makes sense.” Touta looked thoughtful. 

“For what it’s worth, though, I don’t think that’s the case.” Light offered. 

“Why?” Touta blinked in surprise. 

“Because Kira doesn’t seem to have a strong preference for punishing one kind of criminal over any others, as you would expect someone acting out of personal experience would. If they were a victim of one or two specific types of crime, we would expect to see Kira killing primarily or even completely in that league. The fact that most violent crimes that Kira troubles themself with are roughly even in their body count says it’s not personal. Not overly so, anyway. More of a detached sense of justice or right and wrong guiding them than anything else.” 

Touta’s expression brightened up considerably. “You’re so smart, Light! You’re right, that makes a lot of sense!” 

Light stared at him for a bit. “You’re interesting, you know that?”

“Me?” Touta asked, looking startled. 

“Yes.” Light smiled, brightly. “I think most police officers, especially one in your position, wouldn’t be able to see Kira as anything other than the enemy. A crazy serial killer. The fact that you’re actually trying to understand them and where they’re coming from is really interesting. I don’t think there are many people like you.” He meant every word. 

“Not really!” Touta shook his head, hurriedly. “It’s something anyone can do!” 

“But not everyone would bother to do.” Light pointed out. “Empathy doesn’t come naturally to everyone and even then, there’s a limit to how much a lot of people can feel. Everyone has their own limits, but there’s a reason a lot of people have trouble empathizing with criminals or other groups of people. It’s not because they can’t feel empathy or anything of the sort, it’s just that it’s past their limits. You’re one of those people who have much further limits and pushes themselves to understand other people who are very different from them. I respect you a lot for that.” 

“I…” Touta just looked so shocked and his cheeks were tinted red. Light took pride in garnering that reaction. “I don’t know what you say. Thank you, Light…that’s such a nice thing to say.” 

“I like to think I’m a nice guy.” Light said with a little laugh. 

“You definitely are!” Touta nodded, rushing to reassure him of the truth of it. 

“If I’m being honest,” Light decided to say after a moment. “I hope that Kira isn’t evil, too. I’d like them to not be a bad guy, even if they clearly aren’t working within the law, either.” 

“You do?” Touta was just going to keep looking shocked throughout that whole conversation, wasn’t he? 

“Yeah.” Light smiled, softly. “I want to believe that neither Kira nor the police are bad and that they just have two opposing ways of doing the same thing, which is trying to protect people.” 

Touta looked pensive for a long moment as he seemed to consider something. Then he admirably gathered himself and said it. “Do you think Kira would consider working with the police?” 

So his optimism continues, Light thought fondly. Somewhere inside himself, he wonders - maybe hopes - that things could work out where the police and Kira could work together and pool their resources. “I don’t know if that’s the right question to ask.” Light allowed, not sure how he wanted to even answer something like that. 

“Then…what’s the right question to ask?” Touta said, confused. 

Light huffed out another laugh, shrugging his shoulders a little. “Would the police consider working with Kira?” 

~ 🅚 ~

With a few more clicks, Light made the social media post. There it was. 

“Is it finally time?” Ryuk asked excitedly, looking down at the screen over Light’s shoulder. 

“Yep!” Light smiled, brightly. The Misa Situation was starting to get underway. Preceding this, Light had asked Ryuk to do some stuff for him while he was distracted by L. That stuff included watching Misa and stalking her stalker. They didn't need to wait for the stalker to try to kill Misa and doing that was cutting it kind of close anyway. 

Misa hadn't known who her stalker was in the previous timeline and so Light hadn't known, either. So they had to figure out who it was to kill him. Light knew from Misa's fame as a model and primarily the whole incident with her parent's murder where she currently was before she would come to Japan. It was difficult, but eventually one person emerged as continually following her around. Once Ryuk had determined who her stalker was, he relayed his name to Light. Light looked the guy up online for a photo and then the rest is history. 

"How do you know Misa will come to Japan this time if she isn't the second Kira?" Ryuk asked.

"Because Misa is arrogant like that. She believes that she has complete control over other people's feelings." Light replied, his complete distaste for the girl in question practically radiating from him. "It wasn't really being the Second Kira that made her confident enough to approach Kira. She'll probably tell herself that she'll make Kira love her, even if he doesn't. And even if she doesn't decide she loves Kira when she thinks it's L, she'll still want to be of use to him after what happened with her parents."

Because that is what Light remembered most about her. It didn't matter what kind of person Kira was or how they viewed the world or what they were looking for in a partner. She would still remain convinced that she could somehow force them into loving her. Light was certain that she didn't see it that way, but as far as he was concerned, it was exactly what she was doing. 

She had this romanticized idea of love, but when applied to reality, that "romantic" idea ended up being more controlling and bordering narcissistic. In her view, she can make someone she loves love her if she just tries hard enough. If they don't, then she takes that as a suggestion that she just needs to try harder rather than an indication that they are their own person with their own needs and desires. In that way, she robs the other person of their personhood by reducing them to a living reaction to whatever she does. 

More than anything, Light resented her for that. For forcing her way into his life, threatening him and the people around him to get him to date her, and treating him like he wasn't entitled to his own feelings all while claiming to love him. She said she'd be willing to do anything for him and he'd truly tested that, but in the end, it was for her and her own obsessive love. Her obsession drove her to need him in her life and all her service for him was for the purpose of keeping him there. 

Ryuk peered carefully at Light's disgusted look. "If you hate her so much, why did you save her?"

Light sighed. "Because even though her behaviors and actions were disgusting and all of her own choice, I can't help but feel guilty for my actions, too. Even if I was her boyfriend under protest, I definitely took advantage of the situation to try to get her killed and to get her to kill others for me. She's a self-interested stalker, but I used her shamelessly, nonetheless."

"You can't be blamed for that." Ryuk pointed out, helpfully. "It's natural to be angry at the person forcing themselves on you. And if the situation's shit anyway, might as well use it."

"I know." Light smiled a little, thinking about how spending so much time around each other ended up making them think alike. "It would be more in line with the Shinigami mindset to let nature take its course and let her die as she was meant to. No lovesick Shinigami to save her this time. But my human side is being less reasonable about it. Those emotions are saying that I hate her, I used her, I was terrible, she was worse. It's making me act in a way that I acknowledge isn't the most reasonable or clinical…"

Light leaned back in his chair, his gaze going elsewhere. "In that way, I suppose helping her live is a mixture of my guilt and resentment towards her. I felt guilty not lifting a finger as she was murdered, but I also resent her enough to use her once more, this time as a way to further trouble L in his goal of catching me. Sometimes even I don't know how I feel about something or someone. Just a riot of contrary emotions swirling around. But such is being human, I suppose." Light gave a breathy laugh. "I'm not looking to torture Misa this time around. After everything, I hope she lives her life and stops stalking people like a complete mental case. But I haven't forgiven her yet, either."

“Being human sounds exhausting.” Ryuk lamented. “I’m glad I’m not one.” 

“Make fun of me, will you?” Light nonetheless smiled indulgently as his winged friend. "Now, we need to see if she'll take the bait."

The bait being what he had just done, of course. But it wasn't just a matter of having to wait until she showed up in Japan, not yet. There was still more to do, but Light had just taken the first step for that. Naturally, he couldn't convince Misa of L being Kira unless the theory was readily available. In fact, to be the most convincing, that idea should be everywhere . It was human nature to give more credibility to things that are repeated often, even if the evidence backing it up is severely lacking. 

In the past, there had been a few individuals that tossed around the idea that L and Kira were the same person, but it was largely viewed as just another online conspiracy theory. Light wouldn't be surprised if some officers had seen the theories, resulting in them being even more wary of the nebulous L. And as obviously wrong as the theory was, Light could understand where the idea came from and why some people had wondered about it. 

L was someone who lived in the shadows and who had only become known to the world when he publicly confronted Kira on TV. Until then, only members of law enforcement who had been to the Interpol meetings knew of him and even then, he was a faraway and mysterious figure that most didn't even know how to contact. His reputation as a shadowy and unknown figure made it easy to doubt him and think the worst. 

Plus, L and Kira were adversaries, so they were linked together in people's minds. It wouldn't be that far of a mental jump to see them as the same person, especially since both their faces and true identities were currently unknown to the public. These kinds of suspicions turned out to be true in a different way; L was actually pretending to be multiple people. Light remembered L admitting to being the top three detectives in the world and he may have even more identities he didn't know about. 

All in all, it wasn't absurd to think L could be Kira. The thing that's absurd about it was what his motivation could possibly be to stage a war with himself playing both sides. All the theory needed to gain more traction was some more well thought out arguments and a lot more people passing it around. 

Light was more than happy to provide the first criteria!

He'd already created a Kira fansite which he posted this official theory on, but he took it a step further by creating multiple accounts on various social media sites and posting different versions of the same idea on each of them. He took precautions to make it seem like these accounts were owned by different people, such as staggering the timing of posts and having a few of them reference each other for their ideas. All of this increased visibility and coverage. 

Of course, the number one thing that got the posts shared by more people was how sensational the idea was. The more exciting Light could make the possibility sound, the more people would love it. 

"You really aren't taking it easy on your man, are you?" Ryuk cackled, reading one of the posts over Light's shoulder. 

"L likes things rough." Light shrugged, unapologetically. "Besides, he's not gonna take it easy on me, either. He certainly didn't last time. We've always matched each other well." Light paused for a moment. "I'm actually eager to see how the thing with convincing Misa that L is Kira turns out."

“Really?” Ryuk turned to him. “You’re usually pretty good at predicting how things will go.” 

“Usually.” Light hummed. “But Misa has a talent for being a wildcard. Also…she wasn’t terribly interested in L personally the first time around. Half the time, she seemed to hate him, although how much of that was because she was actively on Kira’s side is arguable. I’d be interested to see how she reacts to him, believing that he’s Kira. What will change…and what won’t.” 

Light tapped his chin as a grin spread across his face. “I find I like there being something that I don’t know the answer to.” 

Ryuk cackled. “You’re such a strange guy sometimes, Light. It always made you so interesting.”

Chapter Text

L gritted his teeth at the screen of his laptop. Not for the first time, he loathed the stupidity of other human beings. It wasn’t surprising that a large part of society was starting to support Kira and it was far from a recent development, but he still felt profound irritation in it. Several accounts across social media platforms were posting in support of Kira, utilizing the perceived anonymity of being online and they were being shared and commented on by innumerable individuals. 

Comments were split between those against Kira, those in favor of Kira, and those who haven’t picked a side. 

What are the chances that they’re all dummy accounts made by Kira to try and control the masses? L pondered morosely, navigating through the various tabs. 

These kinds of posts had first started showing up not long after the Kira killings, the popular nickname becoming the killer's official name. After the somewhat disastrous challenge over tv, the support had grown. Many took Kira's announcement using Taylor's body as proof that Kira was both just and all-knowing. It was a great boost to Kira's image, even among the older demographic. L was unused to seeing posts about himself as had been cropping up ever since Lind L. Tailor. Until that moment, L had been largely unknown outside of Interpol. 

After his confrontation with Kira, his anonymity had taken a hit. The public now knew his name and that he was after Kira and their annoying speculations were causing the internet to implode. 

What was worse, Chief Yagami had recently informed him that he was receiving growing pressure from his superiors. They were pressuring the elder Yagami for information on how the case was going and what the investigators were doing. It was quickly becoming apparent that the higher ups in the Japanese police force were growing skeptical of the legitimacy of the case. The annoying thing about most government groups was that they were obsessed with having something to give to the public to placate them. If they didn’t have something that looked good, they conflated that with doing a good job or being effective. 

L had never once concerned himself with caring about what others thought of him. However, he had learned long ago that if he didn't throw the world leaders or department heads a bone once in a while, they would cause him no small annoyance with their increasingly persistent inquiries and refusals to provide assistance in times when it was necessary. He still hated it. 

He’d been able to push most of the responsibility to fielding their inquiries to Watari in the past, but this time Chief Yagami’s superiors know that he has a direct line to L through the investigation. And if Chief Yagami was to be believed, they were making complaint after complaint. It was…aggravating. None of them could even prove Kira’s existence and yet they take issue with L’s methods and results. As if they had a better option over him. L refused to dignify them with a response. 

~ 🅚 ~

"Can you stop typing for five minutes?" Light growled out, rolling over to face the man in bed with him. He squinted his eyes open to glare. L was sitting hunched in his usual posture, typing and scrolling through his laptop. The man never fucking slept, the heck. 

The owl-eyed jerk didn't even glance away from his computer as he answered. "I understand my habits are making it difficult for you to sleep, but I can't stop working for the several hours it takes you to rest. 

"Damn your efficiency." Light snarled, rolling over and pulling his blanket over his head. 

"Are you saying that as Light or as Kira?" 

"As Light!" Light snapped. "Wanting sleep is not a scheme to make you solve the case more slowly." 

"If you say so." L acquiesced. There was a pause in which Light quietly simmered. "Maybe I could try typing more quietly for an hour or so."

Light huffed and didn't answer, shutting his eyes tightly. True to his word, L's typing was much quieter after that and Light finally managed to drift off. 

In fact, it sounded like L had stopped typing completely.

That was the dream Light had that night before he woke up and headed back to the hotel with his dad. It was a common dream Light had had after L's death. Light found it funny, you would've thought that what he would remember most were the big moments between them…the helicopter ride where he regained his memories, the promise they made to catch Kira together when he'd first forgotten everything, the explosive fight they had when Light realized L had given up. Maybe one of the dozens of mind games they played with each other…but no. 

In Light's experience, the things that came to him the easiest were the little moments, the small things. The feeling of L's hand in his own. The gleam in the man's eyes when he became interested in something. How L's breathing sounded on the rare occasion Light had been awake to see him sleep. These were the things that sprang to mind when he thought about his relationship with L. 

His most common recurring dream was the memory of that nothing night where they didn't say or do anything out of the ordinary. Just another night sleeping chained together, another annoyed bickering session. Yet he remembered every detail of that stupid scene, the way L smelled and the comfy blanket he'd wrapped himself in. And it made him smile. He felt warm inside being able to remember those peaceful, quiet times in the midst of all the drama and death.

Light wanted to create more memories like that.

Light blushed a little and smiled dopily as he listened to L mumble. The man was seated by him and was dictating some of his thoughts to the group. His dad leaned forward attentively while others like Aizawa and Matsuda looked more than a little lost. Light was enraptured though. Not by what L was saying really, they were just miscellaneous theories about what Kira’s goals might be. L’s voice got pretty low when he got lost in his thoughts and started muttering and Light wasn't sure when he started finding that attractive. How had he ever managed to convince himself that he didn't care about this man? Of all the lies he'd told himself, it was the one he'd had to invest in the most.

Light winced as another, much less pleasant memory resurfaced. One he couldn’t think about without a spark of pain. It was of the evening he spent at L’s grave after the man’s death. 

Left alone for the first time after it had happened - minus Ryuk who never really left him - Light had almost expected L to pop out of the ground like the zombie he’d always looked like. To pop out of the ground and gloat about how he’d tricked Light again, even as he knew deep down that it wouldn’t happen. He’d won. L was dead. 

A dangerous emotion had welled up inside him the longer he looked at the grave. The Light of the present easily recognized the emotion as grief, maybe even regret. Grief for losing the man he’d refused to let himself care about. Regret for having taken things as far as he did. But the Light of the past hadn’t been ready to acknowledge it all. He hadn’t been ready for that level of self-awareness and pulling at the thread of one emotion would have unraveled him. 

So instead, he choked off the sob that rose in his throat, with the expertise of someone barely aware they were even doing it, and forced it to come out as a laugh instead. It was a breathy chuckle, coming out under his breath, produced from the mangled remains of what was supposed to have been a show of sadness. Once started, he couldn’t stop. Another chuckle followed it, then another. If he didn’t laugh, he’d cry and his mental state had already deteriorated to the point where his prized self-control was slipping. Before long, he was barely breathing through the laughter as it reached a fever pitch. 

His legs gave out under him, but he turned the weakness into a strength as it brought him even closer to where L laid. I won…I won… Light gloated about his victory over L aloud, too invested in convincing himself he was happy at L’s death to check his surroundings for any other people. 

He had to be happy at L’s death. He needed to be happy at L’s death. Because if he wasn’t, there was something wrong with him. It was something to be celebrated. The man who claimed he’d kill Kira but failed. This was his victory over his nemesis, after all. If he wasn’t happy now…then what was he?

Ryuk would tell him much later how crazy he’d looked that day. How deranged. For the life of him, Light couldn’t remember for himself how he must have looked. He’d been too busy “enjoying” the moment. Forcing himself to enjoy it. Light could only imagine though…just how deranged someone who needed to be happy about losing everything had to look.

Sometimes Light didn't understand his past self. Even though he remembered making the decisions he had and his thought processes, it could be hard to look back and understand what made him think the way he did. He supposed he should take that as a good thing for how far he'd come from then, how much he'd grown.

“Uh…Light?” He hadn’t noticed L turn to look at him until L called out to him. “Is there something on your mind?” 

He noticed my mind was somewhere else, huh? Light smiled easily as he came up with an answer. “Actually, there was something I was thinking about. I got you a gift.” Without waiting for an answer, he bent down and dug around in his bag. When he came back up, he had a packaged strawberry cake from the bakery section of that cafe they went to. It actually was pink because it had strawberry jam mixed in with the batter and then it had whipped cream and strawberries on top. Light told him that as he held it out to him. 

L stared at him unblinkingly for a long time, as if he were offering him a live bomb, but slowly - very slowly - he reached out and took it. “Thank you, Light.” 

Light beamed regardless of the reception, just happy that L didn’t reject the gift. He kept the smile on his face as L placed the cake on the table and went back to talking with the rest of the group. Light tried to pay attention to what they were talking about, but it wasn’t long until his mind wandered again. This time, to his activities on social media. 

I've been pretty active with my dummy accounts for a while, Light contemplated. He’d saved Misa a while ago. Things weren’t proceeding exactly at the same time as they did in his first life, but since she didn’t have a death note this time - good riddance, Rem - he didn’t have a strict timeline for him to work on. Still… Maybe it's time I drop the last hint on the account about L's general location. If things go well, I'll just have to sit back and wait for her to show up after that.

~ 🅚 ~

Misa’s family had moved to America years ago and that’s where she started her modeling career. She had barely started out in her career when her parents were murdered. The fact that she was a debuting model was just notable enough to be bandied about in the news and they wouldn’t leave her alone . The media was everywhere, hounding her! Demanding answers to outrageously invasive questions, as if having her loss shoved in her face several times a day by complete strangers wasn’t bad enough. 

And then the trial. The trial . It started out fine enough and she believed that the system would get justice for her…she just had to go through the motions to get it. She was so stupid to think that! Everything was fine for the first couple days, but then things went downhill from there. The defense started casting doubt on her reliability as the only witness to her parent’s murders and the man had had no known connection to her family or a criminal past and so they pointed out repeatedly that he didn’t have any motive. 

They called it “suspicious” that Misa had been the only one to survive the night and insisted that she should have died after Misa testified that the defendant had seen her before he left the house. They called her a liar and made it sound like she could be a suspect in her own parent’s murder, even if they didn’t come out and say it! But the worst wasn’t over yet…the man must’ve gotten a friend to lie about being with him that night for an alibi. That friend testified they were out drinking together, but didn’t remember the name of the bar and wouldn’t look her in the eyes when they testified. 

It was an absolute nightmare and she had started having near emotional breakdowns every day. She got prescribed antidepressants only because she was determined to see the trial through and get justice for her parents, it had just gotten too hard to get up every morning without some help. Those horrible reporters were at it again after talk of an alibi reached them and they started pushing the idea that he was innocent. She couldn’t go to sleep most nights as the case dragged out further and further, tortured by the idea that he could get off for her parent’s murder. That he might be pronounced innocent . She didn’t know what she would do if that happened, she just couldn’t handle it. 

And then some journalists took pictures of her getting a refill for her prescription. More than half of the article they wrote about it was lies and assumptions. They made it sound like she was a druggie who was abusing prescribed medication! Those horrible people didn’t care about her health at all, they just wanted to make sensational headlines to pad their own pockets. 

She put a hold on her modeling career for a while in the hopes of avoiding the additional stress, but the days were becoming so difficult and she didn’t know if she could keep going on like this…if it would just be better if she joined her parents. She never felt safe again after her home was attacked, she didn’t have any other family left, and now every day she was being attacked and hounded both in court and out by people who had no business in her life!! She was barely hanging on….

…and then Kira killed him. 

He was dead. Dead! And he couldn’t hurt her anymore and she wouldn’t have to look over her shoulder again. The court cases ground to a halt, with the defendant dead. The news articles ramped up for a short time after that, with people pressing for her thoughts on the death, but with the consensus being that he was killed by Kira - a spontaneous heart attack like all the others - most of the media came to the conclusion that he had been guilty all along and that Kira’s justice had prevailed. 

Misa certainly thought so. 

The guy’s friend who had provided the alibi never came forward to insist on his friend’s innocence. No, he looked like he tried his best to disappear and Misa was both terribly angry at him and grateful for it. Finally it was all over and she wanted it to stay that way. 

Kira had saved her and gotten justice for her parents…when her life had hit rock bottom and she didn’t know how she was going to live, he came in like her savior and slayed the evil man that had plunged her life into hell. She started to follow news of Kira avidly after that, it was the only thing she had to look forward to for a long time. Although she slowly got back into modeling work, her devotion to Kira remained both the most important part of her life and a secret. Kira had saved her and her parents, she owed him her life so she existed only for them. No matter who they were, she would do anything to help them, anything at all! 

She created fake social media accounts so that she could talk about how great Kira was and connect with people who supported him like she did. It filled all her personal time, but she would do anything if she could actually meet Kira and let them know how much they meant to her. What they had done for her. Kira was her God. 

It was a long time afterwards that she started to run into a particular theory circulating around the internet. She avidly followed word of Kira and their activities and she giggled about every juicy theory she read, but this one was different. It started out feeling as silly as all the others…L being Kira was pretty interesting even if it was silly. People threw ideas around all over the place online about who Kira might be, everything from celebrities to God himself, but they never stuck. L was famous too, but Misa had only heard about him recently, when she watched a recording someone posted online of L’s challenge to Kira. 

She had been super angry at the jerk when she heard what he said about Kira! When she was watching the video for the first time, she’d been on the edge of her seat, holding a pillow tightly to her chest as she practically begged Kira to just kill him and give that jerk what he was asking for! She thought for sure that Kira really would, but even though the man who was doing the broadcast died by the end, she had been too amazed by the time it happened to cheer. 

The guy wasn’t even the real L…and Kira had known . Kira really was amazing, a god on earth! How else could he have known something like that? She didn’t even consider it when she was watching. She was amazed when Kira exposed L’s evil in front of the world like that. No one got one over on Kira, they saw through any deception. L just saw firsthand that Kira was here to expose the evil and corruption of the legal system and the law! 

She’d initially learned about the broadcast from social media and found the recording there and once she’d watched and rewatched the recording about a dozen times, she took to social media again and read more of the comments and conversations that had been posted immediately following when the broadcast had initially aired. The oldest comments were in Japanese since the broadcast only aired in Japan, but following the posting of it online, people had translated it to English and eventually other languages and so more comments in other languages followed as people around the world discussed L and Kira. 

From the way the guy talked during the broadcast recording, it sounded like he was some big shot in crime fighting or something. Misa really hadn’t heard of the guy at all before then. She checked online and it looked like she wasn’t the only one! Most people who were online during and following the event had already chimed in saying they didn’t know about the guy and asking if there was someone who did. What followed was a bunch of comments echoing the same idea, asking if anyone had heard of the guy. It was like he came out of nowhere and appeared overnight with the police’s support.

She hadn’t seen anything about L since the broadcast and she’d definitely looked, even though Kira was still her number one priority and she still had her career to work on. She hadn’t heard of L challenging Kira again or anything big like that, it was like he disappeared after that. She hated L - absolutely hated him - for talking to Kira that way. Talking to Kira like they were a criminal, calling them evil…

That was, until the theory came up again several months later. This time, it sounded more serious rather than someone just making up things online. Then it came up again and again. Misa didn’t know why this one theory was blowing up so much, especially since she’d first seen it months ago, so she started looking for it more online. The more people talked about it, the more convinced Misa became. Instead of laughing about it and dismissing it like last time, she thought about it more.

The more she thought about it, the more it started making sense to her. The people online were right! L being Kira would explain how Kira had known about the fake L during the broadcast and why L felt so comfortable challenging Kira to kill him! Because L was Kira so he knew he was safe. Some versions suggested that the whole thing was staged so that Kira could pretend to be his own rival. A few even said that L/Kira did it so that he could control the police investigation into himself . It was brilliant and exactly what she expected of Kira. 

Suddenly and with rising awe, she no longer hated L. No, she began to see this mystery person as her very own savior. She became convinced of its truth. Who would be more likely to be Kira than him? 

Then the best post ever happened!

One of the accounts that she’d started following after they posted a bunch of pro-Kira content, including posts about L being Kira, suggested that L was in Japan. It was on a thread where people were talking about what L has been doing these last few months, whether he’s been laying low while working on a plan or if he’s given up on catching Kira. A lot of comments had suggestions about where they thought L might be physically and this was where Misa found the suggestion that L was in the Kanto Region of Japan. 

The commentator insisted that it was the only place L could be. L had announced during the broadcast that they’d narrowed down Kira’s location to that exact region of Japan. Whether L and Kira were one and the same or different people, the user insisted that L wouldn’t be caught dead anywhere else but where the action was. It made perfect sense and what convinced her the most that it was true was that an hour after it was posted, the admin had the comment deleted. If it didn’t hit a nerve, there would’ve been no reason for it to be deleted by anyone except the user, so it must be true! 

Misa got so excited reading this that she couldn’t help but scream in delight. She had to know! She had to know if L was there and if he was Kira! Misa didn’t think at all about the possibility that she might not be able to find L, she didn’t think that far at all. Instead, she spent all night thinking about the possibility of meeting Kira and not wanting to waste her chance. The next morning, exhausted and excited, she called her agent and demanded they find her some work in that area, saying she wanted a trip back to Japan. 

She had a decently large fanbase there and she had hardly ever traveled for her job before so even though her agent objected when she first called and insisted on it, they managed to get a job for her soon enough. It wasn’t very big, but she’d already been a supporting lead in a TV series in America by then, so her work came and then she had her foot in the door. She could get more deals, she was sure of it! 

In the meantime, she was going to find her Kira! 

~ 🅚 ~

“Light, can I talk to you about something?” Soichiro asked one night as he was driving them both back to their house. 

It was a regular routine for them to drive back after spending a weekend working on the Kira case. Sometimes they spent the night at whatever hotel they were at, but it wasn’t often. 

"What is it, Dad?" Light asked, looking at him. The two of them had been enjoying a more relaxed relationship since their talk. 

"I wanted to talk about…you and L." Soichiro started, hesitantly. "We need to have a conversation about this." 

"Oh…okay?" Light shifted a little, but he knew this conversation was going to happen at some point. Honestly, the fact that he held it together these last couple days said something. Light knew he was being about as subtle as a jackhammer. Apparently, so was his father tonight. 

"L is quite a bit older than you, I want you to remember." Soichiro said. 

“Okay…” Light prodded, shifting uncomfortably. 

"But honestly, it isn't my biggest point of concern.” His dad pushed on with the determination of a man who had already had this conversation several times in his head. “My biggest issue with it at the moment is that this man is investigating you for murder." 

"Right…" Light said. Yeah, that was a really concerning fact if you weren’t a Shinigami in a past life. 

"Aside from the fact that a relationship with him at this time would be a huge breach of protocol - at least it would be if he worked inside any agency - and I worry that it would be a tool for him to use to investigate you further. The lengths the man has already gone in the pursuit of Kira, I'm afraid, doesn't really instill me with confidence that he wouldn't go even further." Soichiro's hands gripped the steering wheel tight enough that his fingers turned white. 

"Like locking me in a cage to make sure I can't have access to the news?" Light asked without thinking, peering curiously at the man.

Soichiro's hands tightened even further. "I would shoot him myself before I allowed him to do something like that." He gritted out harshly, taking Light completely by surprise. 

"Really?" Light asked, thinking back to his past life where Soichiro had allowed that very thing. Then again, he had tried desperately to talk Light out of it and then insisted he was imprisoned as well alongside him. Maybe something about this route had pushed his dad to the more extreme end. The thing was, Light couldn't tell from Soichiro's voice if he was exaggerating or not.

"Light." Soichiro said, steadily. "I'm sorry I haven't been there for you in the past, but I promise that I'll be there for you from now on. Like hell would I allow someone to use their power to take advantage of you like that, no matter who they are!"

Oh, Light blinked.

"I just don't want you to get hurt." Soichiro sighed, closing his eyes tiredly. 

"Dad…" Light said quietly, feeling his father's concern for him. "I understand. Really, I do. This situation isn't really ideal for anyone, but I really want to work with it."

“Why?” His dad asked, almost desperately as he gripped the steering wheel. “Of all the men in the world, why this one? This is not a relationship you should pursue without taking it seriously. If you just want a short-term relationship…” 

Light cut his dad off before he could continue. “I am taking it seriously, Dad. I promise that what I want isn’t a relationship that’ll be over in a couple of months, I want something more than that.” 

“What about this man do you like that much?” Soichiro’s genuine confusion made it impossible for Light to become angry on L’s behalf. It was clear from his tone that the man truly didn’t understand what Light was thinking. “So much that you may wish to spend part of your life with him? If you’re just impressed by his reputation, then I beg you to reconsider, Son. It’s not a basis to form a relationship.”

Light was quiet for a moment, but when he spoke, he asked a question instead of answering. “Dad, what was it you liked about Mom when you were dating?” He’d heard some stories from his mom, of course, but rarely from his dad and it had been back when he was little. 

Soichiro seemed startled by the question, but after a few seconds, he settled into a thoughtful quiet. “Your mother has such a gentle, sweet soul, you know…” He started slowly. “My parents always told me to find a nice girl and to get married with her and settle down. Have kids and a family. And one day in high school, I met a nice girl. I saw Sachiko.” 

The man paused contemplatively before continuing. “She was a cute girl who was incredibly nice, sweet, and kind. She was one of those people that no one had a bad thing to say about. It wasn’t hard to fall in love with her, not for me. She brightened up every room she was in. She wasn’t excitable and high-spirited like some of the other girls her age - like your sister is - but she had a soothing presence about her that made all my troubles leech out of me. 

With her my school, home life, and eventually work was less stressful. She was waiting for me after my day to listen to it all. You know your mother has enough patience to fill an ocean, a trait of hers that I’ve benefited from endlessly over the years. She waited for me to finish college and gain experience before we married, knowing that it was important to me. Over the years, she’s accepted my dedication to my job without a moment’s complaint, only showing concern for my health and taking care of me even at my busiest. 

She’s unwaveringly supported me through our young and adult lives when many other people would have found it too stressful a lifestyle. She’s stuck with me through it all. Your mother is a remarkable woman.” 

Light listened to his father reminisce with wide eyes. He watched as his dad’s expression softened and his darkly colored eyes shone with a deep love the longer he went on. Light felt warm at the show of love his father still had for his mother. It had been so long since he got to see them interact as lovingly as his father described, so it was nice to hear it. 

I wonder if L and my relationship will mature that way, Light wondered fondly. 

His dad was certainly right about his mother being gentle. Though he couldn’t say he always felt supported - feeling like she held him to a difficult standard much like his father did - but she’d also been the one taking care of and checking in on him and his sister. Sometimes when his dad had been pressuring him hard, it had been his mother who urged him to give Light a little bit of a break. She would have to be forgiving and accepting to marry Light’s dad, given the life of a policeman. 

“It’s the same for me. I think L is remarkable too.” His father made no answer and so Light continued. “I am impressed with his track record and what he’s managed to achieve. That’s true, but it’s not everything.” Light allowed his gaze to drift as he talked. “L is so smart and so clever, I enjoy talking to him. We can talk for hours during the investigation and never grow bored, but we can also be quiet. I’m really comfortable sitting next to him and working quietly without either of us feeling the need to fill the space with talking.”

Light felt a small smile grace his lips. “It’s weird being around him because he never changes and yet he’s always managing to surprise me and I enjoy surprising him. I want to know everything that goes on in his head. Other people like Mr. Aizawa might find his habits irritating or bizarre, but I think they’re cute. They’re just so uniquely L that I can’t help myself. What I want more than anything is for him to find me interesting too. So interesting that he’ll never want to leave.” 

“...That reminds me a little bit of your mother and I.” Soichiro said quietly. “Undeniably different and yet something similar…” His father drew off then and the two sat in contemplative silence. They were quiet the rest of the way home until they pulled into their driveway. Once the car pulled to a stop in front of the house, Light opened the door and started to get out, but he was stopped by his father’s hand on his arm. 

“Dad?” Light questioned him, glancing back at him. 

“Light.” His father said heavily, his brown eyes serious. “Even if you say you feel strongly for him, I’m not ready to give you to him yet.” 

Light laughed. “You make it sound like we’re getting married.” 

“I know you’re in college now and soon you’ll be starting a life of your own.” Soichiro said. “With the way you were talking, that life might be with L. But as your father, I’m simply not prepared to give either of my children to someone else yet. If L returns your feelings, he’ll have to go through me first. If he wants my son, he should be able to at least do that much or he’s not good enough for you.” He finished with resolve. 

“The Greatest Detective In The World isn’t good enough for me?” Light asked with raised eyebrows. 

“Being the best at his job doesn’t mean he’ll be even a halfway decent partner. Trust me.” Soichiro grumbled, crossing his arms with a huff. “It’s my job to protect my kids. Anyone they want to date had better be able to handle more than I can throw at them.” 

Despite himself, Light felt his lips pull into a small but genuine smile. He huffed out a breath of laughter. “I’ll leave the gatekeeping to you then, Dad.” 

Soichiro unwound a little at his words and returned the smile with one of his own. “Well then, we ought to get in the house soon or your mother will be worrying about us.” 

Sayu was way ahead of them both, it would seem. She wrenched open the door just after Soichiro finished speaking and stood in the doorway. “Hey, you two!” She called out to them, ignoring their mother’s approaching voice telling her to stop waking up the neighborhood at this hour. “What are you doing out there? Come inside already and tell us about your day!” 

~ 🅚 ~

A Shinigami that looked like a large skeleton with a small head and moth-eaten wings dragged himself across the barren wasteland that was the Shinigami Realm. His gate was very small and he was so slouched as he walked that he was nearly bent in half. After what appeared to be an eternity of making his way across the almost featureless expanse of land, the Shinigami got to their destination.

Several other Shinigami were already there, not really waiting for them. The group of Shinigami, all with their own unique appearance, were crowded around a large viewing port in the ground, with some of them hunched over it to get a closer look. 

“Heard something interesting was happening.” The Shinigami commented, nudging into a space near the viewing port. 

“Chronos is always interesting.” One of the Shinigami near the edge of the group responded. "The question is: what is he doing now? " 

"Trying to sleep with some human." One of them answered. "Don't know what's so special about him." 

"If Chronos likes him, there must be something." Another muttered. 

“Well, knowing Chronos, whatever happens next has gotta be fun.” The skeleton settled down to watch.

Chapter Text

"What on earth are you two watching this again for?" Their mother came into the living room and levied a skeptical look at the TV. 

Light and Sayu had been tuned into "Misa! Misa!" for about a week. She'd come to Japan recently, ostensibly for a music tour. Of course, she was trying to tap into her fans in Japan and get more work over here, but only Light knew the real reason she decided to do that.

Well anyway, when his sister started obsessing over Misa coming to Japan, he was able to smoothly insert himself and start watching with her. He'd already indicated an interest in such things anyway, so it wouldn't seem out of character if it were analyzed later on. These days, Light and his sister were spending a lot of time watching Misa on TV and he could tell it was starting to annoy their mother. 

Misa was doing some small acting roles lately, but it was obvious she was putting more attention into releasing her album and the reason for that was obvious too. Each and every one of her songs were ladened with thinly-veiled allusions to Kira, followed by messages of love. He had to give her credit; even if Light hadn’t had a central role in experiencing her obsession with Kira, he would have still suspected what her songs of love and dedication were referring to. 

It wasn’t as if she knew about Shinigami anymore so she couldn’t make her coded messages like before, but her references to Kira were still pretty obvious without being so direct that she could be called out on it. If asked, she could still write the lyrics and allusions off as unrelated. He could allow himself to admit - albeit reluctantly - that Misa could be plenty intelligent when she wanted to be and she did have some very clever ideas. Still, seeing through the frame that she was doing all this just to meet Kira, it came off to Light as a desperate cry for attention. 

Light was a little uneasy knowing Misa was in Japan again, but he was also curious about how things would unfold from there. Misa was probably writing and performing these songs, hoping that she could get Kira’s attention, but that wouldn’t have worked, even in Light’s past life. Kira - unless they were a fan of hers - would just ignore her antics in any world, if they even noticed them. 

And L, the poor man Light was trying to convince Misa was really Kira, had no way of knowing that he was expected to reply to her in any manner. Which meant, like all stalkers seeking attention, she would escalate. Light just wasn’t sure what form that escalation would take, but that was fine. 

He liked surprises as much as the next time-traveling, scheming, reformed-megalomaniac who has died and been reborn multiple times. 

The weeks passed, the investigation progressed nowhere, and - Light noticed - Misa’s appearances on TV calmed down a little bit, which meant she was probably about to do something. MIsa had still yet to escalate by the time Light and his father somehow managed to arrive at the worst time, right in the middle of an argument between Matsuda and Aizawa. A better way of putting it was they walked in Aizawa yelling at Matsuda and Matsuda trying his best to defend himself but looking like the last thing he wanted to be doing was fighting. 

“I want to hear you say that again.” Aizawa said. His expression was furious. 

“Well…I think…maybe Kira isn’t so bad, actually.” Touta stuttered, but showed a sense of fortitude by pressing on with the statement despite his obvious skittishness. “They at least seem like they’re trying to do the right thing, they’re just not going about it in the right way.” 

“How can you say that?!” Aizawa burst out, causing Touta to yelp and flinch harshly at the man’s outburst. “Are you trying to say we should sympathize with Kira after everything they’ve done?! Kira is evil! And that’s all there is to it! He’s just a serial killer who’s killing other criminals! One day he’ll snap and start killing all the rest of us, too!”

"You don't know that, though." Touta insisted, brow furrowed. "You can't judge Kira because of what they might do." 

"Oh, you're right, the acts Kira has already committed are plenty to judge. Kira's already shown that they have no regard for human life or the law! Why shouldn't we expect Kira to escalate, especially if we don't try to catch him?" Aizawa fired back. "Or are we just supposed to trust the word of a killer? " Touta flinched back at the word. 

Light stood there with his father watching it all go down and felt a little guilty for his part in how this argument probably came about. He remembered quite a few things like this happening in the previous timeline - Touta playing devil’s advocate with Kira - but he’d also noticed that his conversation with Touta had galvanized him in a way. 

For someone like Touta Matsuda, who was kind and empathetic but also insecure and casually looked down on by a lot of people, having someone respect his opinion and validate his ideas probably meant everything. Light had validated some of his thoughts and it likely gave the usually shy man the confidence to bring up his thoughts in front of the group. 

I don’t regret telling him some of my thoughts or encouraging him, Light thought to himself as he watched the argument go on, like everyone else in the room. L especially was watching Matsuda’s side of the argument with a calculating look, rather than interfering. But I feel bad for him, he really doesn’t like conflict at all.

“I’m just trying to say that maybe Kira could be a force for good. If we talk to them and maybe find out where they’re coming from, we can help them go in a better direction in the future.” 

"Kira can go to hell!" Aizawa snarled, vehemently. 

"There is no hell." Light inserted smoothly, sliding into the conversation. 

He put his hand on Touta's shoulder and gave the upset man a smile. "And maybe Kira can go to hell, but I think putting your fellow investigators through it is too far." 

"What do you mean?" Aizawa asked, still angry looking but clearly restraining his tone now. It appears yelling at his chief's son was quite a bit past what he was prepared to do. 

"Just that while you may be upset with Kira, that's not who you're directing your anger at right now, is it?" Light asked, rhetorically. "How exactly is getting angry at Mr. Matsuda going to hurt Kira?" Light's tone was calm, even as he began to make his position clear.

"That's not what this is about!" Aizawa insisted. "You heard what he said! You don't seriously agree with what he's trying to say, do you?"

"Maybe I do." Light answered without hesitation, flashing Touta another soft smile before turning his attention back to Aizawa. His words stunned the whole group, including the man in front of him. "But that is likewise not what this is about. The issue here is respecting his opinion without trying to force your own onto him."

"What if his opinion is wrong?" Aizawa shot back. 

"A lack of moral rightness on his part does not excuse your own." Light said, clearly. The words brought the older man up short, leaving his mouth gaping open. "If he were right and you were wrong, would that give him the right to talk over you? Overwhelming others to the point where they stop speaking their thoughts is always wrong. Why should he try to understand where you're coming from if you won't do the same? That would be a hypocritical expectation."

Aizawa still looked angry but he made no answer, Light couldn’t tell if that was because he couldn’t find a rebuttal or if he was just too angry to speak. Knowing him, it could go either way. His dad took that opportunity to step in.

“Enough, all of you. This is not the time to be arguing amongst ourselves. It’s best to save our energy for catching Kira.” Soichiro said to the whole room, but it was clear he was talking mainly to Aizawa. Said man wilted under his respected Chief’s critical eye and nodded, slinking back to the fringes of the group. 

“You’re absolutely right.” L agreed calmly, as if he hadn’t just been condoning the argument through inaction, probably just to see what happened. “Please, let’s get back to work.” 

Most of the guys quickly got back to their work with the practiced ease of professionals. Touta, Light, and his father stayed where they were. 

“I don’t like you defending Kira, Light.” Soichiro said after a few seconds of silence. His words were tinged with worry and it’s not like Light didn’t understand why. It made him sound more like Kira in front of a man who had been investigating him for that very thing. No doubt, his dad was worried about a resurgence of L’s conviction of Light’s guilt. He felt sorry that his dad didn’t realize that L hasn’t let go of his conviction that Light is Kira, not even a little bit. 

“I’m sorry, Dad.” Light responded, placing a hand on his father’s shoulder in a gesture meant to comfort him. “But it needed to be done. I can’t keep quiet about something I feel is the truth just to keep the peace, especially if I see something happening that I think is wrong. Arguing might be unpleasant, but it helps more in the long run than keeping my mouth shut does.” 

His dad’s expression looked an unhappy sort of pained, but then it cleared and he gave a weary sigh. Smiling at him, he said, “I suppose you’re right and I can respect that. You’ve grown up so much, Light.” Light smiled back, happily. 

"He’s right. That was really brave of you, you know, Light." Naomi said with approval in her tone as she came up from behind. She stopped next to him and gave him a look of encouragement. “It was also very nice of you to stand up for Mr. Matsuda.” 

"I just didn't like the situation." Light brushed it off. "We shouldn't be picking at each other and Touta sounded so upset even though all he did was voice his opinion." 

“Very mature.” Naomi nodded with a smile. 

“Not so mature.” Light smiled, ruefully. He lowered his tone to more of a whisper so that only those included in their small group could hear. “I’m starting to get so irritated with Mr. Aizawa. He’s been nice enough to me when we’re talking, but as long as I’ve been working on the case, it’s like he’s constantly trying to start a fight. He could learn a thing or two from Mr. Matsuda.” 

“From me?” Matsuda said, startled. After he’d spoken, he glanced around them nervously, hoping no one heard. 

“Of course.” Light encouraged in the same whisper. “You’re always optimistic and hopeful. You push the team onwards instead of dragging it back with petty arguments.” Touta blushed at the relentless compliments. “Mr. Aizawa feels like he’s constantly angry and it makes everything harder.” 

"People can be a little hot blooded in times of stress." Naomi said. "Mr. Aizawa is probably just taking the situation with Kira really hard and is frustrated that we haven’t caught them yet. Though I agree that being emotional and angry isn’t going to help things. Don't worry, I'm sure he’ll come and apologize once he calms down." 

“You’re probably right.” Light muttered, knowing that Aizawa was a man of “hot and cold” temperament. He gave her a thankful look. "I’ll try to be understanding of where he’s coming from, but I don’t know how long I’ll be able to do that if he keeps this up. In the meantime, there was something I wanted to ask you. Do you think I could visit the apartment that you're staying in with your fiance?"

Naomi gave him a look of surprise. “Well, I don’t see any reason why not, but why do you ask?” 

Light gave her his best smile. “I just want to check on Raye myself and make sure he’s okay after his ordeal. Plus, I like hanging out with you.” 

Naomi’s expression softened. “You’re so sweet, Light. You’re the most thoughtful young man I’ve ever met.” Her expression became a little morose. “In truth, it’s nothing that we weren’t both trained to deal with. Actually, the incident with Raye’s kidnapping ended a lot better than it could have. With Raye’s job, it was always understood he could be taken hostage for sensitive information or something like that. And, of course, it could've been Kira.” She gave a hollow laugh. It was clear she was trying to dispel some of the heaviness that was in the air now. 

Light forced another smile. “Yeah, we should be thankful it wasn’t Kira, after all. If it was really Kira, it would have been a lot more volatile of a situation than just some criminal kidnappers targeting foreigners who stumbled into a situation that was well over their heads. Just keep focusing on how it ended, rather than how it could’ve gone. You’ll drive yourself crazy if you get lost in what ifs.” He advised, trying to comfort her. 

“You’re right, Light.” She smiled gratefully at him. “I’ll remember that.” 

“I know you will. You’re one of the strongest people I've met.” Light told her, recalling how she’d powered through the loss of her career and her fiance and her chance at building a family in his previous life. Most people would have crumbled at seeing all that they’d valued in life lost all at once, but not her. No, she was made of stronger stuff than that. 

“I don’t know about that.” Naomi said, looking down. 

“ I know.” Light was having none of it. “I can tell. You’d be able to get through anything even if it was hard. Raye’s probably just the same if he has the same career you did, but it still won’t hurt for someone else to talk with him to make sure he’s doing good.” 

“I’m warming up to the idea, myself. I think it would be good, too. Since we’re planning on staying in Japan until the conclusion of the Kira case - at least for now - but that means that he’s limited in what he can do for work right now.” Naomi revealed. “There’s some remote work he can do for his job, but it’s not as much as he’s used to so he’s been having to keep himself busy while I’m here helping with the investigation. I feel bad leaving him home alone most days after what he went through. I stayed with him the first few days after he was rescued, but he said that he was fine and I should go so I did. I think it’d be good for him to get a visit from someone else. It might help his mood.” 

“You don’t say. Well, I’ll be happy to offer to visit him.” Light replied. The whole situation was breaking new ground for him. By this time in the previous round, the two of them had both been dead. The whole concept of either or both of them moving past what happened and deciding what to do with their lives hadn’t even been a thought before. 

That possibility had been eradicated by his selfishness before it was even a thought. 

He was interested to see how the two were getting along with their lives in the aftermath of the kidnapping debacle. It was a different sort of change than a lot of the ones he’d been making before. Something completely new, without a parallel from his past. It was nice. Besides, there was something he wanted to talk with Raye about. 

“Light, could you please come over here?” L called out to him, distracting Light from their conversation. 

“Sure thing, L.” He responded and then turned back to Naomi. “We’ll talk more about this later.” Naomi nodded her assent and Light gave her a goodbye nod before heading over to L, unconsciously smiling happily as he got closer.

“What is it?” Light asked, momentarily redirecting himself to pull a chair over and plop down in L’s general vicinity. 

“I wanted to thank you for getting involved in the argument, it was very disruptive.” L said and it sounded like just as much of an excuse as it probably was. Light didn’t call him out on it. 

“It’s alright, you don’t need to thank me. I wanted to help Mr. Matsuda, he’s a very nice guy.” Light said, brushing it off. He was confused for a moment when L’s jaw looked like it clenched minutely at his words. What? Was it something I said? Is he annoyed I’m not sounding enough like Kira to give him ammunition? What-? Oh, right. Light had almost forgotten L’s attitude towards Touta. 

It didn’t come up terribly often and it wasn’t so noticeable since L didn’t really treat the man well in the past, either. It had been clear in the past that L didn’t think very highly of Touta’s intelligence or even usefulness and more or less just focused on finding busy work to keep the man out of his hair while he used the other investigators to actually do their jobs. So his general annoyance at Touta’s existence in this timeline wasn’t a huge contrast. 

It was increasingly worthy of note, though. Whereas before - even in this timeline - L had just been disinterested in Touta when he wasn’t causing trouble for him, now he looked annoyed any time he was reminded that the man even existed. Light figured he could guess why, but he did think it strange. Did L really like him that much already? He didn’t know why exactly it happened, but he was reasonably sure that L was jealous of Light’s relationship with Touta.

“Yes well, I still wanted to recognize you for your efforts.” L said, his tone mildly agitated. 

As if you cared about the fight at all, Light thought back. If anything, you were enjoying it. 

“Thanks, Hideki.” Light gave him a smile. “Is that all you wanted?” 

L seemed on the verge of saying “yes”, even though he really looked like he didn’t want to, but instead he said, “I would appreciate it if Light would work beside me for a while. I think that seeing your perspective on a few things would be beneficial to me. You are always helpful.” 

“Sure, Hideki! I don’t mind.” Light beamed. “Let me just get a snack and I’ll come back. I’m a little hungry.” 

“No need, I’ll have Watari bring one to you.” L interrupted him before he could get up, already tapping a quick message out on his phone and sending it. 

Huh, Light thought simply, peering closely at L. When he looked away from the other man, it was to write a note in his (completely mundane, non-killing) journal. It was mostly nonsense that looked like it made sense. In reality, it was a code he came up with for him and Ryuk to talk back and forth when he’s in a place that might have security cameras. They’d been using their free time back at the house to run through it and practice. 

After he finished writing the question he wanted to ask, he leaned back to let Ryuk know he was done and give him a better angle to read over his shoulder. How quickly do you think I can get him to marry me? He wondered to Ryuk via the code. Light rolled a pen between his fingers as he let Ryuk read it.

He heard Ryuk chuckle as the Shinigami finished. “I’d give it…about four months.” Ryuk answered after giving it a thought. 

You think it’ll take me that long? Light wrote back, trying to stop the smile that his lips were trying to tug into. He glanced at where L was crouched next to him, sitting hunched over in his chair and eating a strawberry cake. The strawberry cake that Light had picked up for him that morning from that cafe, in fact. He had been so happy when L had looked at him with suspicion but still accepted the dessert. It made Light happy and he realized he was starting to form the habit of bringing the man his favorite sweets ever so often. 

Ryuk had stayed home the first few days of the investigation. To leave him alone with his boyfriend, was what he said. But inevitably, Ryuk got bored staying home all day on the weekends and all night on the weekdays. Around the time Ryuk started moving things very slightly in the living room so that whoever was there felt things were slightly off without knowing the reason why, Light insisted Ryuk start accompanying him to the hotels. At least the death god didn’t tease them most of the time, content to people-watch instead.

“To get a ring on his finger? Probably.” Ryuk snickered over his shoulder. “To get him to fall for you? Well, you’re probably well on your way to that already, considering he glares holes in the back of that other guy’s head whenever you’re talking to him.” 

How interesting, Light thought at that information, sounding very much like Ryuk as he did so. Well, if L wanted to marry him in the next few months, he was going to have to make a better impression on his father. In the meantime, he would need to keep working on getting L to see how good they could be with each other. A power couple that could terrorize the police from all angles! It could be glorious chaos. L just had to stop being jealous of poor Touta for five minutes and he’d be able to see it, too. 

~ 🅚 ~

Light really should have seen this coming. He really should have. 

It had been a normal workday when Mogi, of all people, slammed open the door and rushed into the room. A man of few words, as always, he said nothing as he quickly went over to the TV and started messing around with the remote. 

“Mogi, what are you–” Touta started to ask, calm but with some confusion. That is, before the police chief interrupted him with far more urgency. 

“Mogi, what is it? What’s happened?” Soichiro demanded, stepping towards him. Evidently, the chief knew Mogi better and so knew that there was something amiss without it being said. The tension and alarm in the room ratcheted up several notches at that.

Mogi didn’t answer immediately, his attention dominated the next few, long seconds by the remote. The TV was now on and he seemed to be trying to find the right channel. Without looking away, he finally spoke, “Someone claiming to be Kira has contacted a news studio. They say they want to meet L!” With that, Mogi finally seemed to find the right channel, as he stopped his incessant clicking on the remote and stood back. On the screen was Sakura TV, the infamous tabloid television show that had no actual interest in real news. 

“To reiterate,” the reporter on-screen was saying. “Someone claiming to be Kira has sent a letter to our network claiming that they were Kira and that they would kill all of our executive board members if we did not televise their message. While their claim remains unverified, we believe it is too much of a risk not to comply with their demands. Their message will play shortly.” 

The entirety of the hotel room stood there gaping at the announcement before suddenly bursting into movement. “Get Sakura TV on the phone! I want that letter and I want it dusted for fingerprints!” L demanded, a rare example of him raising his voice. Aizawa jerked into action at the order and pulled out his cell phone. 

“What on Earth is going on…” L muttered, snapping his gaze back to Light. It wasn’t hard for Light to understand what kind of thoughts must be going through the other man’s mind right then. He believed wholeheartedly that Light was Kira, but this wasn’t very like Light, so he was trying to find out how to fit what was going on into the information he had. 

“I second that! What is Kira doing now?” Touta burst out. He got an annoyed look from L, but that was it. Instead, L turned to the group at large. “Whatever trick Kira is trying to pull, we won’t let them get away with it.” L declared with conviction, staring directly at Light.

Light refused to dignify that look with any sort of response and instead chose to pretend he was more interested in the news coverage. Which wasn’t hard to do. He, too, was surprised by it all, but unlike L, he had an idea of what was going on. 

This was almost just like before when Misa acted as Kira and ended up being dubbed his second by the task force and the news media. Then, like before, it probably served the same purpose. A desperate cry for attention. 

“Sakura TV isn’t picking up! They’ve taken all their lines down!” Aizawa growled, irately. 

“Then someone has to go down to the station and get it, then!” Soichiro said. “And while they’re there, they should try and stop the broadcast. This is madness!” 

“No.” L interrupted, steadily. “We should let the broadcast play out, but we still need that letter.”

“I’m sorry? You want to let the broadcast play, Ryuzaki?” Touta inserted, cautiously. 

“Hmm, yes.” L replied, his usual calm back. “I want to see what this Kira has to say and if they have anything planned. This may be one of our only chances to get more information.” The other investigators as a group seemed to accept that logic even if they looked uncomfortable. Light personally wondered if L would have been willing to let the broadcast run if he didn’t feel like Kira had the upper hand in their little battle. Then again, there hadn’t yet been any threats about some big show of proof of Kira’s power, so…

“I’ll go!” Ukita announced before anyone else, raising his hand as he stepped forward. 

“Alright.” Soichiro agreed. “Make sure you use the fake ID.” He reminded the man. 

Ukita nodded hurriedly and fled out the door, much the same way as he had in a previous life. Light watched him go with trepidation. As much as he knew logically that things were different this time, he couldn’t get rid of the uncomfortable feeling he was getting from how closely it mirrored that day in the past. The whole scene was giving him deja vu. Even though it was happening quite a bit later in time now than it had before. 

The exact date Misa showed up hadn’t really mattered to him and he’d wanted to put it off for his own reasons. Part of it was because he’d really wanted to spend some more time with L before she sauntered in, but also - after Ryuk’s prodding - he’d admitted that he was also worried about his dad. When Misa had started her shit the last time, his dad hadn’t even been out of the hospital yet. It wouldn’t have been as big of a deal if his dad had been able to stay out of it, but the man was determined . 

Light acknowledged to his friend that he waited longer to make his posts that were supposed to draw Misa in because he was worried about his father’s health. He didn’t relish the idea of seeing his father in a hospital gown, pale from a week in recovery after a near heart attack, running around trying to track a killer. He didn’t know she would pull the exact same move with Sakura TV, but he knew she’d do something big and he wasn’t having it while his dad was still sick. The man was fully recovered now, though, and taking charge of the situation, organizing his men and discussing their next moves. 

Misa was more-or-less defanged now, so Ukita too should be safe. If nothing else proved that she hadn’t somehow acquired a Death Note to spite him, then the fact that the reporter’s lines changed did. 

Light was sure that in the past, the reporter had said that the letter they received described the deaths of people set to die before the broadcast date. Misa had obviously killed those people to “prove” her identity as Kira. But now, they hadn’t said that. In fact, as the remaining members of the team worriedly watched the broadcast continue, people had yet to die at all.

The talk show hosts that had bashed Kira in this life and the last weren’t mentioned at all, unlike the last fateful broadcast. There was no channel flipping. 

It allowed a huge weight to slide off of Light’s shoulders. He truly hadn’t wanted those people to be murdered on live TV again, simply to be used as tools to convince the populace that she could kill them. Their only crimes had ever been being visible to the public and having opinions that contradicted Kira. He felt sick that those could ever have been considered enough reason to destroy innocent lives. 

“Light, what do you make of this?” L’s muttering brought Light out of his musings about a past never to return. Glancing over, he saw L now watching the TV screen and pressing his thumb to his lips in that familiar way of his. 

“I think…” Light quickly pondered what he should say and how it would be interpreted. Ultimately, he came to the conclusion that his usual route of staying as close to the truth as possible would serve best here. “...I don’t think this is Kira.” 

“Why do you say that, Light?” Soichiro whirled around on them, clearly having overheard. 

“Hmm…” L hummed, sounding unsurprised. “I second that. Why do you say so?”

“Well, it just doesn’t feel very like Kira.” Light responded, vaguely. 

“How, precisely?” L pressed, glancing at him before flicking his gaze back to the screen. “I always felt Kira to be quite attention-seeking.” He added with what Light felt sure was a mocking tone. 

L, you jerk… Light felt, his eyebrow twitching in annoyance. “That’s not what I meant.” Light said, somewhat moodily. “I mean, why is Kira sending a letter to a news station to ‘spread the word of Kira’?” He asked, using the reporter’s words that apparently were written in the letter they’d received.

“Maybe Kira’s just escalating their behavior as time passes, but it’s still weird that Kira hasn’t done that before now and suddenly, out of nowhere…And anyway, it doesn’t fit with Kira’s known behavior. You’d think if they did do something like this, they’d do it in the form of controlling a criminal to get in front of a camera and giving a monologue before having them die on-screen. Not all this reporter's nonsense!” Light went on, starting to get heated. 

“In fact, this whole thing feels out of character for Kira! If Kira was going to choose a news outlet for this, why is it a cheesy gossip-monger like Sakura TV? I can’t even imagine Kira watching that channel often. And Kira threatening reporters might just be an empty threat, but it’s very out of character to threaten innocent people with death like this. Kira’s always been dedicated to only threatening serious criminals. He’s never tried to hurt people that didn’t adhere to his purpose.” The room was silent for a minute and then the spell was broken by Touta. 

“Wow, Light.” Touta said with eyes wide, sounding awed. “That was amazing. You really analyzed the whole situation!” 

Light blushed and gave a small smile at the older man. “Sorry about that, I think I got a little too into it.” 

“Not at all.” L inserted, his tone unreadable. “Your observations differed from my own, but we both reached the same conclusion. I too suspect that this person isn’t Kira.” 

“You do?” Soichiro asked, moving to stand by his son and place a supportive hand on his shoulder. 

“Of course.” L replied, as if such a conclusion should be obvious. “Despite the fact that they’re claiming to be Kira, they have done nothing to prove it, which would necessitate predicting a death before it happens. Light was also correct, this feels different from my past encounters with Kira. Like someone with an entirely different personality is behind this. Still, we shouldn’t underestimate them yet. We have no idea how desperate this individual may be yet or how delusional. There’s no telling how they’ll react to being stopped.” 

“Then Ukita shouldn’t be going alone!” Aizawa burst out, stomping towards the door. “He could be attacked!” 

“Mr. Aizawa, stop. I am afraid I have to ask that the rest of you all stay here.” L called out, causing Aizawa to freeze where he was reaching out for the door handle. 

“I’m going.” Aizawa said darkly, but he didn’t move. 

“We should listen to L.” Soichiro chimed in, tone serious. 

“Why!” Aizawa whirled around, but he didn’t aim it at the chief, but at L instead. 

“We don’t know what’s planned yet. It’s better if we can stay where we can keep an eye on how the situation develops.” L started, only to be cut off by Aizawa angrily storming towards him and grabbing his shoulder. 

L still didn’t look at the man and Aizawa jerked his shoulder, angrily trying to make him look. “ What?! Are you saying we should just wait here and let Ukita go into this situation alone?! What are you going to do if he gets hurt or worse?!” L made to answer, but someone else intervened first. 

“Mr. Aizawa, please let go.” Light said as he stepped towards the two, his voice more deadly serious than anyone in the room had ever heard it. Aizawa let go of L’s shoulder almost as if out of shock, his expression surprised as he looked at Light. 

Light wasn’t happy enough with that, though. He didn’t stop until he’d reached the two and gently but firmly wedged himself between the two. He faced Aizawa head-on with a steady gaze. “I know you’re scared, Believe me, I am too. We all are. But that’s not an excuse to fight amongst ourselves. Please control yourself.” His tone made it clear that choosing to do anything other than control himself was not going to be an option for him. 

Aizawa, shocked out of his anger by Light’s behavior, responded with hurt, “Aren’t you angry, too? He doesn’t care at all what happens to Ukita out there!” 

“Of course he cares.” Light parried back. Whether L actually did care about Ukita’s life or not wasn’t the issue for him at the moment. It was the assumption that he didn’t that Light wanted to defend the most. “He just doesn’t show it like we do. Just because he doesn’t yell and fly into a panic doesn’t mean he doesn’t care. Hideki is attempting to be clear-headed so he can make responsible decisions as the leader of the Kira investigation. We can’t afford to make emotional decisions that could end up getting us hurt, even if it’s a hard decision to make. Just because he isn’t showing off his emotions for all to see, doesn’t mean they don’t exist.” Light defended, heatedly. 

“I…” Aizawa looked admonished, glancing away from Light before visibly convincing himself of something and determinedly turning back to L. “I went too far, I apologize, Ryuzaki.” He said, bowing to the man. 

“That’s quite alright, Mr. Aizawa. I know how hard this situation must be for you and I commend you on your concern for your fellow investigators.” L, who had watched the entire confrontation take place with surprised eyes, chose that moment to speak up again. 

“I should be clear, I know that Mr. Ukita is armed and he will be using fake credentials once he gets into the building, just in case Kira is involved. I believe that he should be able to handle whoever he encounters there. However, there are not very many of us on the case and I cannot in good conscience risk many of us by sending out any more of our members than necessary into an unknown situation until we can establish more about it. To that end, I need all of you here where it is safe and where the chances of us noticing something about the situation are better.” L endeavored to explain his reasoning better. 

“I see.” Aizawa said quietly, thinking about that. 

Light slowly started to relax and slumped into a seat near L. The group started discussing once more what this might mean and whether Kira was actually not involved in any way. 

A few moments later, Soichiro’s phone rang. “Hello?” He answered it. He listened for a moment and then turned to the group. “It’s Ukita. He said he got into the building and secured the letter. They wouldn’t let him in until he flashed his badge and he says they absolutely refuse to stop broadcasting. He’s been arguing with their boss about it.” 

“Unsuccessfully, apparently.” L commented, glancing at the reporter on-screen. 

“At least he’s got the letter.” Touta spoke up with a bright smile. “We might be able to find out who wrote it if they left some fingerprints.” 

“Would they really have been so stupid as to touch the letter without gloves?” Aizawa asked, his brows furrowed. Light didn’t know that. 

“Even if they don’t leave fingerprints, they could still have left some DNA on it that we can use to trace them. Hair or skin cells might work.” Soichiro contributed his opinion.

“The contents as well may be of interest. Their motives, as well as any accidental information about their identity or whereabouts may be written in there.” L concluded, thoughtfully. 

“What should we do about the broadcast?” Aizawa asked, looking back at the TV with a troubled expression. 

L thought for a moment. “It may be more trouble than it’s worth trying to stop it. As of now, no one has gotten hurt and we have no proof that this is actually Kira or even an individual who has the same abilities as Kira. For now, our best bet may be to sit back and watch how the situation develops and what this person claiming to be Kira says they want.”

“This isn’t the first person who’s come forward, claiming to be Kira.” Soichiro stated, heavily. “They are the first to go this far, however.” Most of the people in the room nodded, solemnly. They knew that to be true. 

It had been frustrating for the police the first couple weeks after the live confrontation between Kira and L because a gaggle of nutcases came out in droves, claiming to be Kira. Whether they did this because they needed psychiatric help or because they just wanted the attention, Light didn’t know. He supposed it didn’t matter in the long run and the claims tapered off as the excitement died down. 

“Indeed.” L said. “This is the first person claiming to be Kira who tried to take a news studio hostage. For that, I can be a little impressed by their audacity.” Despite the fact that there was no inflection in his tone, Light couldn’t help the surge of jealousy he felt at the comment. He immediately wrestled it down, reasoning to himself that envy was an ugly emotion and L was still the most interested in the real Kira. 

L added one more thing. “However, this fact also makes them dangerous. Until we can predict what they might do next, it’s important to act as if this person is just as much of a threat as Kira. To be on the safe side, we must apprehend and interrogate them as soon as we can do so safely.” 

The group waited quietly for a while until Ukita came back with the letter he’d taken from the station. While they were waiting, Watari came around and asked them all for their choices in midnight snack for the night and he managed to return with said snacks, placing each person’s snack in front of them, before the officer returned. 

Once Ukita was back, safely ensconced in the investigation room, the group sat in the center of the room in a circle and passed the letter around. The letter had already been encased in a plastic bag so that they could look at it without getting their DNA on it. Touta and Aizawa blinked in surprise after reading the contents, while L reread the letter while holding it by the corners with an unsurprised expression. 

“So this person claiming to be Kira wants to meet with L.” Soichiro stated, his words cutting through the heavy silence that had settled over the group after they’d all read the absurd demands the possible Kira imposter was making. 

The television had been turned off shortly after Ukita got back with the letter. They’d managed to obtain it before it could be televised and the crooked manager of the studio had been heavily warned against trying to do so before Ukita left the studio. They wouldn’t stop the broadcast, but that didn’t mean they wanted Sakura TV’s fear mongering to get even worse. And, as L explained to Ukita over the phone, it would only make things harder for them if such demands of L were to be televised where the public and government officials could hear of it. 

Light could definitely agree with that. When Misa had demanded L appear on TV in the past timeline alongside threats if he didn’t, governments and members of the police force were eager to throw the great detective under the bus. 

“It’s absurd! Where do they get off asking for something like that?!” Aizawa ground out through his teeth. For once, his anger wasn’t directed at L. 

“Of course!” Touta immediately backed him up, turning to the rest of the group. “If they do have the same abilities as Kira, it would be a death sentence for L to do that! Even if they don’t and they’re just a fan of Kira, they could be planning to assault Ryuzaki with a knife or a gun or something!” 

Soichiro sat in quiet contemplation for a moment at the words of his subordinates. Then he turned to L. “Are you really thinking of going to meet this person?” He said such without very much emotion in his tone, keeping his thoughts carefully controlled. Light was familiar with that habit of his, it was when his dad was being a complete professional. The man disappearing behind the policeman. 

“Hm…no, I can’t say I am.” L answered calmly, lowering the letter to place it carefully on the table. “I will have Watari take a look at this for fingerprints. In the meantime, I think it is important to discuss where we will go from here. I’m interested to know what you think we should do, Light.” L queried, suddenly dragging Light into the center of the issue. 

You just can’t stand to not try and pressure me, eh? Light huffed in his mind, but he only allowed himself to blink in apparent confusion on the outside. “Me?” 

“Yes, I would be most interested to hear your thoughts on the matter.” L said decisively, not once looking away from the letter on the table. 

Light thought about it, what he wanted to say. It was obvious that L wanted it to appear to the group that he was asking because he respected Light’s intelligence, but they both knew it was because he wanted to study Light’s answer. To find something Kira-like about it…to use what Light says to augment his idea of how Kira acts…maybe a little of both…

Anyway, Light had his answer. “Well, you absolutely can’t go yourself. It’s just too dangerous. We don’t know what this person is capable of yet since they haven’t killed anyone that we know about, but they’ve made threats so we have to take that seriously.”

Light idly took notice of the emphatic nods that his words gained from the officers in the room. After the moment’s pause, he continued on. “But it also might present us with an opportunity that we can’t afford to ignore. If our goal is to arrest them and determine if they’re a threat, it would be the most dangerous, but also the quickest and most direct route of doing so. At any rate, it’s clear they want something so they’re unlikely to skip a meeting if we manage to set one up.” These words caused most of the others to don thoughtful expressions. 

“What would you suggest, Light?” His father asked. 

Light gave him a small smile. “I think we should set up a meeting if we can figure out a way of doing it and have one of us pose as L. A number of us can also be at the scene, ready to apprehend or intervene if they make any threatening moves.” 

“And you believe that to be the correct course of action?” L asked. 

“I really do.” Light nodded. “We’ll need to handle the situation carefully, but it’s best not to let this opportunity get away from us. If we ignore this person, their behavior will only escalate and then someone could get hurt.” 

“You do make a good point.” Aizawa stated.

“But what if they really are Kira?” Touta inserted, worriedly. 

“Well, Kira apparently needs someone’s name to kill them. Their real name, not an assumed one or their correct name but misspelled, right?” Light had taken special care to make it appear as if he had those two limitations in this life, as well. The fact that he could now tell anyone’s name by looking at their face better served him as a secret. 

“That’s correct.” L stated, now watching him intently. 

“Then as long as the member of our group that meets this person still uses their fake ID, then it should be safe enough and the rest of us will be on standby. But I really don’t think this person is Kira. They haven’t done anything to prove it, no one’s died. Besides, the way this person is acting and the steps they’ve taken don’t match Kira at all. We’re probably dealing with a run-of-the-mill pretender.” 

“Hmm…I agree with you on that.” L muttered. “And I agree that your response seems logical. We must take special precautions, though. It would be a shame if I were to be killed by some random person hopping on the Kira bandwagon.” L’s lips tugged into a frown, likely recalling the last time he had to deal with someone random pretending to be Kira. 

“Don’t be ridiculous, Hideki.” Light said, grabbing L’s attention. 

With a vague smile on his lips, Light raised his snack - an apple tart - to his lips, ready to take a bite. 

“Kira will never kill you.”

Chapter Text

Light was starting to get on L’s last nerve. 

How was it that this boy always seemed to manage to know just the right things to say? How was it that he always managed to peak L’s interest while at the same time appearing to be innocent to any bystanders? The boy was either incredibly lucky or ruthlessly intelligent. If L was an especially unlucky man, he might say it’s both. 

For a while now, L had found himself with the uncomfortable realization that his current position isn’t what he would want it to be. L always did his research before agreeing to take a case and many were so outrageously simple that he didn’t even see himself as having an opponent. The few times he had felt that he was at a disadvantage in one of his games, it hadn’t lasted long. This was different. This was a prolonged - one might say, never-ending - feeling that he was caught wrong-footed. 

While crime solving was a game for him, it was one he’d always played from an advantageous position. This was the first case - and the first criminal - that challenged L’s superiority. Perhaps it was Kira’s seemingly supernatural ability to kill effectively but for the first time, L wasn’t standing atop a mountain, watching as his opponent tried to scramble their way up to his level. 

No, he was on lesser footing, if anything. It was a realization that took a little time for L to come to and he still seethed at admitting it to himself. L found meeting others on equal terms distasteful, he preferred to have the deck stacked in his favor always. This was humiliating. This was embarrassing. Kira was the first case in a long time that L had taken a special interest in, that had captivated him. So much so that he’d already gotten on the case before the world governments got desperate enough to ask him to come in. 

And yet, even if that was the case, he had severely misjudged just how formidable of an opponent Kira was going to be. He imagined a battle of wills and of wits between two geniuses, who were both admittedly arrogant and bored by the world. L imagined an epic battle where L - despite not caring overly for morality and justice - would nonetheless stand for Good while Kira would stand for Evil. Not that the infamous killer would see themselves that way, of course…

That isn’t what he got. 

No, instead what L got was the runaround. Over and over again. The boy had seemingly made it his personal goal to confound L with everything he did and the detective would be damned if it wasn’t intentional. He felt like he was starting to lose his grip on reality…or what reality should be, at any rate. 

Nothing had gone the way he expected it to and while his predictions in the past had not always been accurate, almost none of the ones he’d made lately have been proven true. From the moment they first interacted, Kira had continued to baffle and evade L’s machinations at nearly every turn. L expected Kira to rise to his taunting, because he expected Kira to be a prideful person with a savior complex or something of the sort. What else could you call someone who went on some sort of holy crusade by murdering a bunch of criminals? Some of which hadn’t even had trials? 

However, except for that first confrontation when he’d pretended to go on screen in front of Japan, Kira hadn’t reacted to his challenges since. 

Then, after Light Yagami had come onto his radar, he’d chosen to show himself to the boy in person, only to be surprised by the boy’s reaction to him before and after he found out L’s identity. He’d offered to let Light onto the team searching for Kira to test him, only to be soundly rejected. He’d continued to be rejected, despite his efforts, until Light had finally joined, only to meet with a smiling wall every time he tried to trip Light up in conversation while they were working. 

It didn’t help that Light had made it clear by this point that he had a crush - despite subsequently refusing to date him - and that everyone else on the team seemed to love him. They would probably defend Light’s honor to the death, especially Soichiro Yagami, Naomi Misora, and Touta Matsuda. 

Kira was basically rubbing his identity in L’s face at this point. As L stared at Light’s smile after he stated that Kira wouldn’t kill him and Light stared back, he was absolutely certain of this fact. 

~ 🅚 ~

It took them less than a day to find the probable identity of their Kira impersonator…because there were fingerprints all over the letter, but only from a single individual. There were no other fingerprints aside from that set. They couldn't possibly have been that stupid, L had thought but nonetheless, he had allowed Watari to run it through the police’s fingerprint database. 

There had been no one with a criminal record. However , there had been a match found on file and surprisingly, it wasn’t found through the JPD database but as part of the US. Rather than a suspect to a crime, this individual’s fingerprints were on file because they had been a witness to a crime and it had apparently been found necessary to distinguish their fingerprints from those of the suspect. 

Why it was still on file when the case had been resolved months ago, L didn’t know, but he suspected either someone carelessly forgot to delete the information or kept it due to an abundance of caution. Regardless, they had a match and it was so ridiculous that several members of the group almost demanded that it must be wrong. 

One Misa Amane was the owner of the fingerprints, a famous model and burgeoning actress who had quickly become popular in the US and whose popularity had also infected Japan. Currently nineteen years old, she was the daughter of a Japanese man and an American woman and had joint citizenship in both countries. It seems she was born in Japan and spent her younger years there but her family moved to America when she was fourteen and that is both where she lived up until recently and where her modeling career started. 

She had blonde hair and brown eyes and was 152 centimeters tall. She recently came to Japan and seems to be trying to expand her audience here. Very little of this information wasn’t publicly available in some manner. L knew of her from teen magazines, but he looked into her much more when the fingerprints were tied back to her and so when he sat the rest of the investigators down to discuss their options, he was prepared. 

“Surely, it must be a mistake!” Aizawa exclaimed, not for the first time, when the sit-down discussion began. L didn’t care to look at him, playing around with a couple of strawberries sitting in a bowl on the table in front of him. 

“It does seem really hard to believe.” Matsuda interjected, hesitantly. His eyes glanced around the group nervously. 

“Criminals come from all backgrounds.” Soichiro gently reminded them. “However, I will admit I find it startling. A young model being directly involved in this.” He gestured at a picture of Misa Amane from a magazine that was placed on the table.

“Well, it’s not an everyday occurrence.” Light acknowledged, casually. “But you can’t judge a book by their cover. Besides, there’s no explainable reason why her fingerprints would be on the letter unless she had sent it.” He pointed out, bringing everyone back to the core of the issue. 

“You’re right.” Naomi smiled at Light. “She hasn’t committed any serious crimes that we know of although if she was really the one who wrote and sent those letters, she is guilty of making criminal threats against those who work at Sakura TV. Regardless of if she wrote them, she absolutely had to have had a hand in sending it for her fingerprints to be on it.”