Chapter 1: Crime scene destroyer
Chapter Text
It was one of those nights when everything went utterly wrong. Maybe it was the dinner that had burnt. Maybe it was the so hated phone call from your mother or best friend which you'd tried to avoid for so long. Maybe it was your car, which just broke on the street. But for a woman around 28 years, it was worse: her evening ended up with a murderer.
The police lights colours the area in blue. The location of the murder scene was usually calm and perfect for runners to keep up with their healthy lifestyle. But being so peaceful at daytime, it becomes a scary nightmare at night. Now, the huge trees, rising to the sky beneath the broad way, throwing their sharp and big shadows into the forest. The artificial car lights gave it a more bizarre impression.
Busy officers and people in white jumpers moved around, talking and sharing informations.
In the middle of them, right next to a spot with a lot of markings and number cards, was Iwaizumi Hajime, forensic doctor, holding the camera in front of his eyes, the shutter clicked multiple times. He lowered the device and looked at the victim, who has been laying there for approximately three hours straight, maybe more. It needed to be examined.
His jaw muscles were tensed, his eyebrows knitted. Almost the same like the last two cases…
It wasn't the first time he's been called, regarding the circumstances of the murder. The first case happened two weeks ago: a young man, being strangled and found dead in the middle of the night, close to the lake. The second case occurred seven days ago: another man, also strangled to death. They had been murdered with precision, it wasn't an act of robbery.
The forensic doctor had thought at first, that the murderer was going for men, but there they were, having a woman as a victim. It fell out of the crime routine…
Hajime turned around, straightened up and called his assistant, Yamamoto Akane, to come over. The short woman, with the ridiculous big two tails to her sides, was a newbie, just three months in business, and it's her first real case, being active in. She's very excited, and although it's a bad event to be so, she simply couldn't stop grinning.
“Please, tell the officers to make sure that nobody can enter the place from the parking lot. We have some foot prints here and I don’t want them to be destroyed by some bystanders.”
Akane nodded, but then approached him a little bit closer.
“Do you think that’s connected to the past two murders?” she asked, cleverly combining the facts which were presented.
“It can be. I’m not sure because she’s the first female victim. We’ll have to examine her later.”
Akane nodded again and then left to do her task properly. She's just about going, when she looked up and found some tall stranger who's approaching her. Some really handsome stranger, as she noticed. With a slight blush, she walked away faster and wouldn't only tell the officers about the footprints, but also her colleague Michimiya about that man she just met.
The aforementioned was, by the way, not only a stranger. He's the most competent detective in the city and was called just half an hour ago. It needed some time to get there by taxi, but when he saw all the officers and forensic workers...his pace sped up. Too many idiots who are about destroying the crime scene!
But that wasn't the worst: on top he saw that man with the camera, in his stupid white jumper, giving orders to others and acting like a superior there. It pissed him off because only he, the great Oikawa Tooru, could give orders on a crime scene! Always has been, always will!
“Who are you? Get out of my crime scene!” he shouted immediately to the stranger with a very pissed undertone, coming closer.
Hajime had just been talking to another assistant, when he was interrupted like that. A vein of anger was visibly seen on his forhead, pumping the blood through it.
“Get out of my crime scene…?” he repeated, mimicking the guy behind him and turning around, pretty upset, “Maybe I should ask you, who are you? Your crime scene? Do you have any IC or should I call the officer to drag you to the sidelines?”
There's not much that can make him enrage like that, but that man did it and hit two places of his personal ranking of annoyance:
First – acting cocky without any competence to do so (and even if you have that...should you?!)
Second – interfering with his work.
Hajime straigthened up and took a look at the man in his beige coat, who was about three or four inches taller than him. A bit too handsome too, with his curly brown hair, his beautiful shaped eyes and the well angled face of his.
Tooru smelled the authority the other tried to show, and got even more offended thanks to that little act of the jumper guy. He hated it when people did that: ignoring him, ignoring his capability, doing the alpha stuff, although he is clearly the one who's the best in what he's doing.
Raising an eyebrow, he gave a sarcastic smile.
“Are you serious?!” he stared at him for a few seconds, “You’re just an ordinary man who hates cats because he’s allergic.”
Hajime stared back, puzzled, but before he could reply to that, the detective already goes on,
“How do I know that? From the cat hair that remained on your pants and that you tried to remove with your hand, but due to the allergy you got a slight skin irritation. How am I able to say that? Because I’m the detective here, so get out of my crime scene and stop pissing me off.”
W-what!?
Usually, he would have gone for another round of fighting words, but Hajime was still confused about the conclusions the other did.
When he looked down on his pants, he could see the almost invisible cat hair – that annoying man had very good eyesight! - then he took a look at the bare skin of his hand which was only exposed at the wrist part, because of the gloves which ended there and the hem of his jumper, which was a little bit rolled up.
Hajime had to acknowledge that, but…looking back, he clicked his tongue,
“Sorry to correct you, detective, but neither am I a cat hater, nor an ordinary man - if you meant some weirdo by it.”
He started walking over to the tall man and gave him a really pissed off smile.
“But congratulations to your good eyesight. Maybe I should offer you a job in our forensic team, because I myself have an Identity Card right on my chest,” he pointed to the rectangle plastic holder, which was clipped under the half transparent jumper, “whereas you could be anyone. Any ordinary arrogant man.”
Standing right in front of him, only one step away, Hajime had to look up.
Fuck it, that really is about three inches height difference!
“Oh, Oikawa!!” someone suddenly shouted from behind them.
Both of them looked in that direction at the same time, staring at a police officer coming towards them with fast steps and a polite smile on his lips.
Sawamura Daichi was a brillant worker and Hajime has been cooperating with him a few times. He's really reliable, determined and could make it to the top one day.
Pulling off his hat as a greeting, he smiled even more,
“Ah, did you two already meet!?”
Wrong conclusion. There's nothing to be happy about!
Hajime gave him a puzzled look. So he knew that shitty guy with no manners at all?
“Oikawa, this is our forensic doctor in charge, Iwaizumi Hajime,” he introduces them to each other with a light hand gesture, “And this is one of the best detectives we could have requested - the best detective in town, to be honest - Oikawa Tooru.”
“What??” both of them shouts, staring at each other in disbelief.
“He?! A forensic doctor?! Don’t mess with me, Daichi-kun! Maybe he has an IC here, but he’s only an arrogant idiot guy! I don’t want pompous and incompetent forensic doctors in my crime scene!” Oikawa snorted and crossed his arms.
Wow, that clearly is competence!
“Look in the mirror, Mr.Shitty-behaviour...no wait...Shittykawa. Stop messing with my work, go home or make yourself at least useful!” Hajime talked back and glanced to the officer,
“Sawamura-san, I’ll have to continue so the body can be brought to the morgue.”
He exhaled and then gave the detective next to him a sharp look.
“So…wanna go on pouting like a five-year-old or will you start? Else, I’ll be finished in 15 minutes and will submit my report, that the detective in charge wasn’t able to cooperate.”
As Hajime turned on his heels, about to walk away, Tooru gasped, as he stares at that oh-so-damn-cool-and-handsome forensic doctor in disbelief.
It has been ages since somebody has insulted him like that! Treating him like that!
“You can’t just call me by a shitty nickname and walk away! You…Iwaizumi, uh? Then Iwa-chan!" he thought of a fast nickname for the other, too, “Shut up already and let the real competent one work here!”
“Screw you, Trashykawa! I’ll give you as many nicknames as I want!”
Tooru walked past the shorter one, almost bumping into him with his elbow on purpose, and kneeled down to observe the body.
The poor police officer Daichi stares at both of them, confused by what is going on.
“There are many scuff marks on her neck, which means she was strangled. Perhaps with a rope, no…rather a thin steel wire, it can be defined by this subtle mark it has left on her skin,” the detective really began to work now and pointed to some spots he mentions. His voice got serious and there was no sight of his childish, cocky self before. Hence, Hajime stayed silent, crossing his arms. These facts he had to agree to, he has deducted and recorded them, too.
“In addition…the woman has a small cut on her right index, and her skirt is wet on the left side. It rained four hours ago, this does not help us, but there is also some particular mud on her shoes that is not present in this zone. It’s from the rural area, 10 kilometers away, which is know for its ancient clay sources. The woman was there before her death, perhaps to meet someone. Perhaps the killer.”
Doing this was fine so far, but he ruined the mood with one simple call, “Iwa-chan?”
Although, it really bothered him, Hajime reminded himself to stay calm and being the pro he was. So he ignored the pet name and pointed at the evidence numbers around the body.
“We haven’t found the crime weapon yet, but some foot prints in the close-by area, right to the forest. My assistant is already measuring them and taking pictures, but there was also the same kind of mud. Guess it came off the tread. Boots.”
He pointed to the number three, where only some almost invisible traces of blood are to be seen,
“As I said, no weapon. But her wallet misses her IC and driver’s licence. Everything which helps to identify her. Money as cash is still inside. It doesn’t sound like robbery, and furthermore-”
“No need for your slow examination!” Hajime got cut off by the detective and snorted angrily about it, “The footprints out there are size 42, wide stride, he must have been a fairly tall man, about 178 cm, weighing 76 kg, given the pressure of the footprints.”
Tooru glanced over to the forensic doctor. Just by listening to him, he had got excited in a very negative way, because that Iwa-chan guy didn't know how to work. Too slow, too ineffective, for his liking.
Standing up again, he shifted his hands in the pockets of his beige coat,
“It’s obviously not robbery. It’s a pre-organized murder, clear as the sun. I need the chemical examination, and especially an examination of the cut in her index finger…that’s particular. Daichi-kun, I need Mika-chan to enter the laboratory to examine some proofs, and did you search about a valid assistant? I need one,” he kept talking, completely ignoring the forensic professional next to him now, as he's talking with the police officer.
“Actually…Mika-san’s shift ended an hour ago. There’s Ayato-san in charge now…” the police officer said, biting his bottom lip, feeling caught between two stools. Swallowing down the growing lump in his throat, he started to ask himself why it's like they'd have another murder if he closed his eyes just for a second.
“Oh, for God’s sake, I can’t stand that idiot!” Tooru groaned, “Ugh…I can’t wait though…”
“What do you think about Iwaizumi-san? He can do the researches for you and he’s a great forensic doctor to to begin with!“
They were still talking, as if he's not there. Tapping with his right foot on the front, Hajime kept staring the detective down. At least, he was trying to. If he had a paper in his hands, it would have been crumpled by now.
What a fucking self centred idiot?!
He was totally looking silly because of that Oikawa-idiot!
“Sorry for interrupting your little discussion,” he now butted in, “Thanks for intruding the crime scene without identifying yourself beforehand and for making my job looking worthless.”
He turned to the officer,
“Sawamura, I’m out. Give him my key, my IC and also the password for the computer. Guess this asshole can do everything alone, although he’s not familiar with the correct order and moreover not with being a team player.”
But then, he suddenly grabbed the idiot-detective by the collar of his coat and dragged him a few meters back.
“At a word, Mr-know-it-all,” he gnarles, until they are out of reach to be heard over.
Letting him go, he shot him down with a sharp look.
“Thanks for your great assumptions, but if you don’t like to cooperate with us - and believe me, I could imagine better too, than doing this with you -, then I’ll gladly ask for another detective. But you won’t make a mess out of my work here! I’m not fond of you either, but at least I’m not such an obvious idiot, who mistook this as his personal pouting playground, okay?”
Oikawa stared at Iwaizumi with widened eyes as the guy was getting enraged, blurting out his thoughts too straightforwardly...and this is what he appreciated the most.
Daichi may be out of reach, but he still could see clearly what was happening and also hear everything, because Hajime was speaking loud enough. So he came over, putting a hand on the forensic doctor’s shoulder, still trying to make things work there. Poor guy.
“Wait, Iwaizumi-san! Actually, Oikawa doesn’t know how to examine proofs. The last time he was left alone in a laboratory, the hospital had to call experts in toxicology and radioactivity. He had released toxic substances that almost killed not only him, but the entire building!”
Hajime stareed at him, then at the detective.
“What are you talking about, Daichi-kun!” Tooru chuckles, trying to sound innocent, “You made it bigger than it actually was…”
Still he looked like being caught red handed and blushed because of embarrassment. Tooru brushed his coat, as if Iwaizumi had wrinkled it. Then he looked at the forensic doctor with serious eyes,
“I may be full of myself, because I’m sure about what I say and do. But I also know for sure how to work with others. If you’re as competent as I could see here, you would have guessed, that I’m the best detective you’ve ever came across,” he went on, showing his supremacy, but staying calm now, only getting an eyerolling in return.
“I need you to examine those proofs for me and do some researches. If I didn’t know how to team play as you say, wouldn’t I be on my way to the laboratory to examine those by myself already, Iwa-chan?”
Giving the explanations by Sawamura and listening to Oikawa’s words now, Hajime could only lift his eyebrows in sync.
“Yeah, seems to be a masterstroke leaving you in the laboratory all by yourself,” he murmured and shook his head.
“I tell you something...I’ve been with a lot of detectives. Young ones, experienced onces, aggressive ones, depressive ones, detectives who just talked...and even if you made some good conclusions... The way you’ve walked in, as if it was your fucking red carpet, covered your abilities. Except one: your lack of social skills.”
Snorting, he went on, “Playing the conductor of an orchestra isn’t exactly team play. Because, if one of them doesn’t follow you, you can earn more catcalling than standing ovations. And I won’t let you insult me, my job or everything else.”
After that speech, he gave a final look at Hagaki, “I’m calling it home time for our team, when the rest is finished.”
Oikawa started to struggle with himself, but the confident and stubborn side in him, let him step forward, in front of Iwaizumi, as if to stop the doctor.
“S-So…”
W-why am I stuttering?!
“Do you want to help me or not? You’re the one here who is insulting me, and believe me, you’re not the first. I’m used to people hating me. So… are we going? Or do you want to continue arguing with me like a 5-year-old?”
He's staring down on Iwaizumi once more, with his serious and proud brown irides, somehow enjoying the fact he's the taller one between the two of them.
Daichi had to suppress his chuckles, because even if Oikawa says that…for him it's clearly the detective himself, who looks like a 5-year-old. And of course, the forensic doctor didn't feel impressed by his performance at all. His lips curled to a light smile, but not out of sympathy.
“Oh, so we finally have something in common? I’m also used to people who can’t stand the fact that I’m talking back, although...they are taller or seem to be superior.”
Looking up to the other man, acting as unaffected as possible, because he really hated it, being the shorter guy, he continued with a long exhale,
“Well okay, but a little reminder. I haven’t been the one who started this. And I’m not helping you. I help to solve the case and will work with everyone who is therefore needed.”
Getting rid of the glove of one hand, he opened the jumper and slid it down, so he could take his phone out of his pocket, calling his assistant on the other side of the area. He was speakng about some details, the work progress and then he hangs up, putting the phone back to its place but also getting out of his work coat at all.
“We can go. They are finished,” he explained, rolling together the mess of plastic fabric with his gloved hand, “Are you here with your Peugeot or will you take the ride with us?” he called over to Oikawa.
That detective absolutely looked like a Peugeot driver. The one who picked up girls, wanted to impress them with his car and driving skills…could he not travel back to the American west coast, where his overly confident detective brain comes from?!
“I came here by taxi. If it’s a problem for you, Mr-Grumpy-Iwachan, I can take one on my way to the hospital too, to not bother your oh-so-pissed-off ass, yeah?” Oikawa replied with a shrug.
“But let me say one thing,” he approached him now, smirking, “you’ll end up liking me. Everyone does.”
Hajime’s eyes narrowed, as he felt the warm breath of Oikawa against his lips. He wanted to say something, but he was only able to flinch, while the detective was giving him a hell-of-an-attractive smirk.
“In your dreams, Mr. Womaniser,” he mumbled and started walking. Trying to hide the fact, that his heart had jumped for a moment by his action.
“I’ll introduce you to the rest of the team.”
He lead the way to the parking lot, where the car was. Three others already had assembled and were looking up. Akane’s mood enlightened the moment she saw the attractive stranger again and whispered something into the other woman's ear next to her. She was almost as tall as Iwaizumi, had short dark brown hair and nice round brown eyes with long lashes. She looked cute and somehow shy.
Oikawa noticed the guy among them, a tall one, wearing a turtle neck pullover, having black, short and little bit messed up hair and a sharp sight. He looked serious, composed, but this didn't mean anything as long as he hadn't spoken to him.
“Guys, this is...detective Oikawa Tooru. We’ll be working together from now on. Oikawa...these are Michimiya Yui, Akaashi Keiji and Yamamoto Akane. She’s our newest member.”
The latter smiled in awe and nods.
“Iwa-chan, you’re not calling me with strange nicknames in front of your team, uh?” Oikawa joked and got another eye-rolling in return.
“Hey guys, my pleasure! I’m sure we’ll get along well,” he smiled attractively to all of them, showing his charm, but then stared at Iwaizumi again, who had a confused and pissed off expression written all over his face.
Yeah, you’re not the only one, who has more than one side.
“Believe me, it’s not that I don’t dare,” Hajime murmured and got louder again, “Squad talk-with-the-dead, just call him Shittykawa!”
Akane already chuckled, when she had heard Oikawa call her colleague and mentor Iwa-chan, but chuckled even more when Hajime called him like that.
“I’m sure we’ll get along!” she said cheerfully.
Akaashi nodded in agreement and pointed to the van, “Please take your seat, Oikawa-san, we'll head directly to the hospital. By the time we arrive, the victim should be already there.”
Hajime watched how both of them got caught by the put-on kindness Oikawa shows, and frowned.
“That’s why I prefer working in the morgue. Annoying people remain silent,” he murmured to Yui, who gave him an empathic smile and a comfort touch by the shoulder.
“Let’s go!” she said and they were also taking their seats.
This could only get…interesting.
Not. Could not!
Chapter 2: Crime scene destroyer
Summary:
Iwaizumi looked up, “Wanna lend me a hand, detective?”
He gave a short smile, the first one ever for Oikawa.
The aforementioned stared at him, goosebumps and chills running down his spine, he couldn't explain.
That smile now was really…beautiful to see.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
During the ride, Oikawa’s laughter, along with Akane and Akaashi's ones were to be heard more than just once. They talked about everyone and everything, having fun. With his cheerful smile, Oikawa acted as the nice guy, he's already made the impression to be. Nobody would imagine that he had a nasty tongue, like Iwaizumi experienced it first-hand.
Therefore, observing the brunette guy with suspicous eyes and an annoyed expression from the front passenger seat...he was totally ignored. Of course, Oikawa was aware of the forensic doctor’s glares, but despite a look into the driving mirror once in a while, he didn't give the other much but his satisfactied grin, because he was pissing off the spiky haired man.
They arrived at the hospital within forty minutes, making their way to the morgue. Taken off their outdoor jackets or coats, the team changed into the laboratory ones and got ready for assisting the autopsy.
“Iwa-chan, make sure to analyse that cut on the index finger properly!” the detective teased him with an innocent smile on his lips.
“You’d better make sure that I don’t analyse your brain damage properly!” Iwaizumi barked back and he almost threw the working coat into that arrogant face.
“Uff...he’s normally so calm?” Akane mumbled in surprise, as she saw her mentor getting grumpy all over again, stomping into the examination hall, “You really have a talent to upset Hajime-san” she smirked at Oikawa then, and didn't even bother to link arms with him.
Yeah, she is the offensive type of girl who showed when she liked someone.
“Still he's very talented and a great mentor! So even if you like teasing him...don’t make fun of him, okay? Else, I'll get angry too!” she joked.
Oikawa only nodded in comprehension, but asked himself for a moment how serious the young assistant was about the last part of her speech.
“Don’t worry, Akane-chan! I can handle impatient doctors like him!”
They entered the cold room and were immediately greeted by another colleague of theirs. Getting up from his chair, as he was sitting at the desk and doing some administration stuff, he grinned and came over.
Maybe an exchange student?
Oikawa made his conclusions, scanning the guy from head to toe: red dyed hair, more the K-pop guy style. A little silver piercing in his left earlobe. His skin was fair pale, so he wasn't from a too southern country. Or he has been already living too long in Japan. The guy was tall, taller than himself, maybe 190 cm. When he held out his hand to give a shake and Oikawa took it, the latter felt a rough palm. Scarf-skin, right on the fingertips. Guitarrist.
“Evan Maddison, nice to meet you” the stranger introduced himself and Oikawa did likewise.
Then Evan turned his head to the forensic doctor, “Good timing, Hajime, our new guest already checked-in!”
He pointed to the covered body on a litter next to him,
“I had a look, sorry. I was too curious. Post mortum liverdity on the shoulders and the back, light red – the meds said that the victim was in the cold?”
“Yeah, could be. What about rigidity?” Iwaizumi stepped on the litter, uncovering the victim to the waist.
“About seven hours,” Evan answered.
The examination began. Akane documented everything, because she was still not ready to do an autopsy on her own, and had to learn the process first, so that Iwaizumi asked her some questions now and then. How to proceed, what is the next step, etc.
Helping him undressing the victim, they examined the body for other injuries and come to the same results, Oikawa had already given at the crime scene.
“Evan, examine the cut on the finger,” the forensic doctor ordered, “Full laboratory parameters, search for traces of metal but also for toxics: sedatives, poison. We have to assume that the victim met the murderer privately.”
Oikawa stayed silent most of the time, kept listening at the autopsy report Iwaizumi was recording and had to admit that the forensic doctor really did a good job.
He smiled secretly all to himself, and let the procedure continue.
Right after the first steps were done and everyone of the team got out of the morgue for a quick five-minute break, he approached the cute grumpy forensic.
“You’re actually very competent and your work was impeccable, Iwa-chan.”
Stretching his muscles after standing long enough in an half-bent position (and also since early morning), Iwaizumi looked up. For the first time he wasn't annoyed by Oikawa, but surely unaware that he had been watched the whole time.
“I have to take back my words aaa~nd…” Oikawa lengthened his word, coming even closer, so that their faces were only separated by a few inches now, “You’re a lot cuter when you work with those serious eyes of yours!”
Iwaizumi held his breath and stared into those marvellous brown eyes, which gave him a wink. He couldn't prevent himself from blushing when he felt Oikawa’s warm articulated words on his skin, tickling softly.
The detective smirked at him - too smug for Iwaizumi‘s liking - turned suddenly around and then head off, right out of the room. The shorter male swallowed and tried to calm down his heart. That spontaneous action of the other made it impossible for him to scold Oikawa for entering other rooms without asking, as he heard his loud cheerful voice outside, calling “Yo, Kuroo! I need you for some stuff, mind coming with me?” He even made it impossible to react properly to his words and especially his wink...
“Earth to Iwaizumi Hajime, come back down, astronaut!” Akane's small hand appeared in front of him in a waving motion.
Irritated, Iwaizumi blinked at her twice, finally snapping back to reality. Still, there's that pinkish tint on his cheeks. The young woman’s smile became a wide grin and her eyes were half closed now. A typical I knew it! expression.
“Sure, one can get overly gay for Oikawa-san, but-”
“What are you talking about?”
“Just that I can understand, if you'll be interested in him! He's pretty charming, isn't he? I like him! So, no shame to-”
“I’m not gay for Oika-” he interrupted her loudly, but stopped himself, when Oikawa suddenly returned with a taller man next to him, who he knew as Kuroo Tetsurou. Someone, who was great in chemistry and doing the most complicated analyses, Hajime had came across.
But rather than asking the detective why he dragged Kuroo there, the forensic doctor hoped that the brunette hasn't overheard his little conversation.
He tried to read something in his brown eyes, but was completely shut out by the perfect pokerface and smile.
“See, Iwa-chan? I have many friends here!” Oikawa waved over to Kuroo.
Iwaizumi cleared his throat, finally able to find his speech again.
“Funny, so why haven't I ever seen you here? Did we get too boring cases? And stop using that shitty name!”
Good! This was his usual self!
“Actually…he’s calling me in every once and a while. Doing chemical analysis for this freak most of the time. Help him out with cases, ya’ know?” Kuroo explained politely with a slightly raised hand, then tilted his head to Oikawa, “And you have to stop calling me, whenever you please! I've got things to be done, too!”
The culprit’s very mature reply? A stuck out tongue.
“Kuroo-chan, you know you love me. And Iwa-chan, I won’t stop calling you by this name, until you’ll stop calling me by those shitty of yours!” Oikawa stated confidently, as he winked at the forensic doctor again,
“Now, Kuroo come with me. No complaints, science needs focus!! See ya, Iwachan!~”
“This...jerk...”
Iwaizumi only gnarled about that overly confident detective and shook his head, as he waved off and tugged the poor scientist by his laboratory coat. So…why did he even come back? Just for some proof, that he had an acquaintance here? My…
Cocking his head to the side, he noticed Yui standing next to him. Being so absent-minded, he didn't even hear his colleague coming back, too.
“Ah, sorry…” he tried to apologise for his misbehaviour, but the beautiful woman with the round brown eyes only shook her head in understanding.
“It’s okay…wanna grasp a cup of coffee?” she asked with some hope in her voice instead, smiling as she always does when she was with him.
Iwaizumi stared at her for a moment and finally decided to agree. He wouldn't get another break soon, as he knows himself well enough – being a workaholic.
“Yes, give me some caffeine to deal with that mess. Maybe, I'll be able to focus better again.”
They walked out, turned left at the door and just some metres ahead, the forensic doctor felt that Yui glanced at him thoughtfully from the side.
“What is it?” he wanted to know, irritated.
“Well…” she bit her bottom lip, anxious about something, “I guess...it has no meaning now, because of today's events, I know, but maybe...we can shuffle our plans for movie night to next week?”
Oh…there it hit him! He totally forgot!
Suddenly stopping in his movement, Hajime looked at her really shocked.
“Oh my God...I...I really...!!” he blurted, blinking, and somehow at a loss of words, “I’m sorry…I was so absorbed by work and I…I even occupied you until now...”
And they wouldn't even have made it to the movie, even if they would have left the hospital by now.
Not in twenty minutes, when the movie was about to start.
“It’s okay,” Yui continued smiling, showing compassion while her shoulders sank nevertheless – a sign of disappointment, “Let’s try next week then!”
She stroked back a strand of her short hair. Then she noticed that he was still looking at her, so terribly sorry, and the uncomfortable atmosphere between them increased much more. Although, she wanted to stay mature, not showing her sadness or anything, Yui’s heart was squeezed too much by the emotional distress, and breathing became difficult too. Acting as if it wasn't a big deal for her. Because it was. So she decided to take the emergency exit.
“Ah, I think I forgot my purse at the office! Er…go ahead? I’ll be there in any minute!” her voice was shaky, as she almost hasted through the corridor, leaving him behind. Iwaizumi pursed his lips…yeah, that was his fault again.
Although he had been knowing Yui for two years straight, they didn't get closer until two months ago.
She had asked him out for lunch, just between colleagues, but the way how she was acting around Akaashi and how she was acting around him were totally different. Not the typical hysteric girl-fell-in-love attitude, but her eyes showed much more caring for Iwaizumi than they should. Chuckling in a cute tone on his jokes. Reassuring him, if something went wrong.
And so it was not only lunch but also an afterwork walk. He had offered her a ride home with the car, because it was on his way and it was already pretty late. She had thanked him with a kiss on the cheek, when she got out of the car. They hadn't spoken about it.
But then, a month ago, she took up all her courage and asked him out for an official date! Iwaizumi had felt honoured and as he really liked her and had somehow started to care for her more than for any other person, so he had agreed. The date had gone well, too. They had had fun, got to know each other a little bit better and she had linked arms with him, walking back, as he had also allowed her to snuggle up a bit because it was cold. Their 'for professional reasons exchanged numbers' led to occasional chatting from that point on.
Going to the vendor machine alone, he chose a simple black coffee and sat down in front of the big machine, in the seating area, sighing deeply.
Right...we've been trying a second date for four weeks…
He looked up to the gray ceiling and closed his eyes for a moment.
Yui was a kind and strong woman, determined at her work and easy-going, maybe a little shy and only for that complicated, but somehow...yes, he likes her, but she doesn't set his heart on fire. Whereas she is clearly in love with him...
Love could grow, right? Love at first sight, all the butterflies in your stomach and everything…that’s nothing that must happen, right? Maybe, he just needs time to adjust? His last relationship had been a long time ago...maybe his heart only needed to get reminded how it felt to be loved and to love?
*
Hours went by and Iwaizumi still had so many work left that he would stay longer than originally planned. After having his coffee (of course Yui had not returned), he stood concentrated in the morgue, right in front of the fresh case's body, starting with the still remaining autopsy they would have done tomorrow, anyway.
He wasn't the type for having music played while working, as he preferred the silence. Still, short hummed melodies came out of his throat from time to time. Cutting off the comfortable silence which was hovering in the room, where no one else except him and some dead people were.
And usually, his night activity did not draw too much attention, because most of the staff knew about his workaholic-state. However, one guest did not.
Oikawa had spent some time with Kuroo in the laboratory, watched him doing his analyses and waited for the results impatiently, while fumbling with a pen.
Almost disappointing normal…at least the blood had been infected with a toxic drug! The drug itself still had to be researched, but it meant progress, nevertheless.
So when he walked down the floor from the labratory, another idea crossed his mind, and he made sure that nobody would see him.
Doing his work without being interrupted, or having to discuss working-methods and permissions out, would have been the normal way for any employee of the police.
However, Oikawa is not. Not the normal employed detective the police has in their rows. With his own desk in the police department, sharing his results with the colleagues. Oikawa works independantly and therefore,…he has his difficulties with getting permission every once in a while – and doing his stuff regardless, not caring if he was on the legit side or not.
So when he reached the morgue’s door, ready to examine the victim by himself – just from the outside, as it would cause attention if he just opens a body of course – he saw some light coming out from the examination room. His eyebrows knitted. Who on earth was working that late there…?
He quietly shoved the door open, so he was not to be heard or seen, but then gasped, as he found a too familiar figure already examining the victim, standing with his back to him.
“Oh, Iwa-chan! You’re a night owl, too?”
“Woha!!” Iwaizumi shrieked, “Holy fucking shit!!”
He jumped, almost throwing the scalpel in his hand into the air, as he heard Oikawa’s voice.
“Fuck...” he swore under his breath, “What are you doing here? No, wrong question... Can’t you just knock? You gave me an heart attack!!”
Exhaling, Iwaizumi tries to calm down again. No need to fall into stress mode, to flee or fight.
Relax, body! It’s just the dumbass Oikawa!
“I thought you were a too calm and serious doctor who can’t be scared at all…guess, I was wrong!” Oikawa smiled in amusement and approached him now, as he got his attention anyway,
“I wanted to examine the body once more, so I waited until the doctors were out…seems, I miscalculated that you’re a night owl and probably sleep here too.”
“Everyone would jump and scream if an odd-omniscient person like you shows up out of the blue” the forensic doctor mumbled, clearly embarrassed, and cleared his throat. Oikawa‘s explanation still made him look surprised, but he turned back to his work, playing it cool.
“You could have said so? No need for secret agent behaviour. As long as you're part of the investigations, I mean…and yeah, I usually work at night, too.”
“So, you are a night owl?“
“I won‘t put it like that. Work just never ends“ Iwaizumi continued and cut a long line in the middle of the chest, but doing two more diagonal cuts after that from the upper starting point,
“Sleeping pillow and blanket are already there” he nodded over to his desk, where a pillow and a blanket were hanging over a chair's back indeed, and he continued,
“There was something strange which kept me occupied. It isn’t the cut or the mud, but...I don’t think that we’ve already found out everything we need to know. We had only an outside examination today, haven’t got to the organs, and my instinct never fails me, we‘ll find something else inside” Iwaizumi looked up, “Wanna lend me a hand, detective?”
He gave a short smile, the first one ever for Oikawa.
The aforementioned stared at him, goosebumps and chills running down his spine, he couldn't explain. That smile now was really…beautiful to see. He snapped back to reality and gave the other his smirk in return.
“Sure, I wouldn't have ever imagined you asking me for help though, Iwa-chan,” he winked at him, undressing from his coat and throwing it over the chair at the desk. Then he got some one-way gown from the side and also gloves, and put everything on - so he was similiar dressed like the forensic doctor.
“Better be quiet or I’ll withdraw my decision!” Iwaizumi returned, but somehow had to keep smirking, while that wink gave him another unreasonable extrasystole.
After the needed cuts, they made use of the rip retractor, getting closer to the body's inner secrets.
“I think that this wasn’t only for murder...but for something which couldn’t be finished. Let’s see...”
Being extremely focused, the forensic doctor bit his bottom lip, starting to palpate carefully and then goes on,
“I’ll start with opening the stomach directly. The manual says other, but I think that I’m guessing right.”
“Go on, in that case…I think I agree with you,” Oikawa nodded and after a while, under pounding hearts of excitement that their assumption might be correct, they both held their breaths,
“Tell me that you see the damaged plastic bag with drugs too...”
“Yeah...” Oikawa said, observing with sharp eyes and swallowing with an undefined smile, “That’s…exactly what I hoped we would find.”
“Body packing case?”
“Kuroo’s analyses told us that drugs were involved. We still don’t know which kind of, but it clearly reveals now.” Overrun with endorphines, he turned to Iwaizumi,
“This is…awesome! So we finally found what really killed her! I should have got it by just looking at her - ugh! Guess, you’re the best doctor after all, Iwa-chan!! The drugs…The plastic bag is branded…this BD, I know who the culprit is!! I’ll send Daichi-kun to arrest him!”
Iwaizumi looked up, when Oikawa stepped already aside, taking off his gloves and getting over to the desk where his coat was hanging. He reached for its pockets, to fish out the phone.
He didn't like to admit it, but that happy smile on Oikawa’s face showed him another side of the annoying detective and it was…really lovely.
But then he realised what the brunette had said.
“W-wait, what?!” he stammered, “anyone who’s familiar to you? You mean...in the criminal records?!”
“Ohh…I know so many criminals, you can’t even imagine!”
Making his call, Iwaizumi only kept on watching him, listening to the calm and serious voice, as he talked with the police officer who had helped them before at the crime scene.
After three minutes, Oikawa hung up and turned around. Keeping his smile up, which becomes more triumphant now, and out of all things he suggested something Iwaizumi would have never expected, now:
“Are you hungry?”
Notes:
Thank you for your lovely comments and for enjoying this story of ours! We really appreciate it a lot! <3
Oikawa is being bold now... what will Iwaizumi say? ;P
Chapter 3: Restart
Summary:
“By the way, that genuine smile suits you much more than your exaggerated ones.”
“Oh my,“ Oikawa chirped in a lower tone, “...does Iwa-chan like me this much already?”
“W-what? D-Do you wanna get your head slapped so bad, Masochistkawa?!”
“Then, mind telling me why are you stuttering?” the detective smiled, not moving an inch away.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Iwaizumi would have refused, but his stomach took its chance, and let the strong rumbling play like an orchestra, as Oikawa Tooru asked him about having some late-night dinner.
That non-verbal answer was actually a very good one for the detective and so he grinned, chuckled a bit and clapped his hands together.
“Then let’s go, I know a place which is always open, and the food is so delicious you’ll faint!” he promised with a high praising undertone.
Closing the procedure, writing down what had been found so far and shutting down the lights and everything, they left the morgue and hospital within thirty minutes. Heading directly into the direction the detective‘s finger pointed to.
Fresh air circulated around them, making them shiver for a moment, but it felt good nevertheless. It was clearing their heads from the excessive work and let the tiredness vanish in an instant.
“So...how often are you here? The hospital, I mean? You quite know some people and still I’ve never seen you before.”
The forensic doctor was not bothered by silence, but still he was curious about the fact that he really hadn't known Oikawa until now.
Oikawa smiled at Iwaizumi’s question and kept looking in front of him, hands in his coat’s pockets.
“Whenever I need it. I can be around everyday or…once in two months, it depends on the case. I’m sure it was an unfortunate coincidence we haven‘t met yet, but I used to sneak in the morgue thanks to Kuroo. So…I don’t really know so many forensic doctors.”
Oikawa let himself relax, inhaling deeply the nice refreshing winter air and closing his eyes for a moment, his head turned up to the sky.
“I see,” is all Iwaizumi said quietly. He nodded, but could not let his eyes off the other, taller man. The chill air, the night lights and Oikawa’s delicate figure absorbed his mind completely.
When he is not talking shit, he really seems to be a nice guy...
“We could give you permanent permission to do so” he offered sheepishly and was shocked right after because he got so bold, “I mean...no sneaking-in necessary?! I-It’s just a thank you for your help. And eh...”
Iwaizumi scratched his neck now,
“Maybe...we can start over, too? It isn’t the best, having a first meet-up in a murderer case” he smiled shyly now.
It was the detective's turn to look at Iwaizumi, surprise written all over his face, and slightly shocked.
“You’re the first one ever, wanting to start over with me, you know?“ he exclaimed, with some lingering happiness in his voice, “People usually hate me in the first place, so they don’t actually want to change that.”
Iwaizumi stayed silent for a few seconds and then he had to suppress the urge to chuckle. That wouldn't have been polite at all, but…he couldn't help it.
“Well...I don’t think that you’re the shittiest guy the world has seen, but you also have some nice sides too” he replied quietly and they left it like that.
After another five minutes, they suddenly stood in front of a traditional little restaurant. The ones with wooden doors and paper covered windows. The ones which have some fabric banner hanging outside with the name of the shop or the shop’s references on it, written in simple hiragana syllables. Typical Japanese.
Rising his eyebrows, Iwaizumi followed Oikawa inside, after the latter had made a gesture of Here we are, shall we?
The detective greeted the guy behind the counter with a friendly smile and familiar wave of his hand. He seemed to be the only one working here, doing some dishes and so…was he the chef?
He had grey short hair, a little thick eyebrows and huge upper eyelids. His stature could have told otherwise: being an athlete, a trainer, anything but the owner of a restaurant.
Still, Iwaizumi knew that the staff in such small shops had a lot of physical work, and of course they were in need to build muscles. The fact that the guy seemed to be not much older than themselves, maybe even younger, surprised him nevertheless.
“Yahoo, Samu-chan! I brought a friend” Oikawa smiled very sweetly, pointing over to Iwaizumi.
“I see…nice to meet you” Osamu replied, giving a polite smile to Iwaizumi, who bowed a bit and greeted him in the same way, referring to the nice atmosphere and the delicious smell. The warmth had hit him in an instant and crawled up his cold legs.
Taking off his jacket, the forensic doctor put it over the chair next to him, when they took their seats in a calm corner.
Letting his eyes wander, Iwaizumi had to smile secretly to himself. He already liked it here.
Taking the menu out of the card holder to his right, Oikawa shoved one to his dinner partner, who thanked him for the gesture and started reading. Very focused, as he was at work, too...or it was just because he couldn't decide among all those tasty sounding meals?!
Oikawa stared at that scene for a while, but couldn't suppress a laughter at Iwaizumi's concentration.
“You’re so funny, Iwa-chan. No wonder Yui-chan was so sad.”
Of course, Iwaizumi hadn't noticed what kind of impression he was giving right now, and so he glanced at the other with a puzzled expression in his eyes, partly embarrassed.
"W-What?“ he asked, "W-What do you...?!" he stared at the detective, then avoided eye-contact fast, "I‘d better don’t ask how do you know,“ the forensic doctor exhaled, mentally preparing himself to reveal further information as the topic was already disclosed, “Well...it can’t be helped, right? Murder never hit the timing.“
He put the menu card down but still seemed to be busy with it. Somehow. Acting. At least he tried.
“I’m a detective, remember?” Oikawa winked at him, then only smiled and looked at him with sincere eyes, “But if she’s your girlfriend, you should take better care of her, you know? Shoving her aside like that…she’ll leave you one day!”
Yeah...that is exactly why he did not ask for the how…
Having a colleague as a talking buddy could be very exhausting. Nothing to hide. No excuses. Just the truth. And moreover, Iwaizumi is a bad liar, anyway.
“She isn’t my girlfriend,“ he admitted quietly with a sigh and gave up pretending to be occupied with the menu – did he really hold it upside-down before?! Shit! –, “We’ve only managed to go on a date once...”
Osamu came around by that time, giving him a small break and when they were asked what they wanted to order, Iwaizumi decided to go for the chef’s speciality.
“You know that, Samu-chan, same as usual,” Oikawa said to Osamu, then he focused back on the forensic doctor in front of him, who had thrown him a quick look, wondering about the same as usual, but also returned the card to its holder and had sunk back into his seat.
“She seems to be really in love with you, Iwa-chan. You've got to put much effort in it, or maybe…do you already have another girlfriend?”
“Who do you take me for?!” the accused one exclaimed more embarrassed than before, and cupped his head desperatly in his palms.
This guy drives me crazy!
“Of course I don’t… I’m just…I don’t know. Maybe it’s for the better, if the odds aren’t in our favour...” the man - who was working in a scientific field and surely didn’t believe in coincidences, fortune telling and anything else paranormal - sighed.
Looking at the table‘s surface, he still felt guilty about not even messaging her after he had finished work. Just a short message would have done it. But on the other side...he bit his lip.
“I see uh...” Oikawa replied and sighed, as if he knew everything, “You don’t like her, that’s why you don’t put so much effort in it. But you, loving your work more than anything else… that’s something we have in common.”
His gaze aimed for the scenery outside the window. The dark night which covered the streets and the tiny lights in the houses round them. The naked branches of a tree, hanging lose. With a nostalgic look, he got himself lost in that picture, unaware of the impression he was making right now.
Iwaizumi looked up slowly, noticing the change of Oikawa's voice, the absent-minded sound of it.
“Maybe. I tried, really. She is kind, caring, but…I think, I’m just not made for being someone's perfect husband, who works 9 to 5,” he chuckled bitterly and then kept watching Oikawa, who was staring outside.
Beautiful...
The thought crossed Iwaizumi's mind, totally absorbed for the moment. Clearing his throat five seconds after, trying to keep up the conversation they had and trying to get rid of that heart-warming feeling he just sensed, the doctor passed the ball back.
“So…according to your words, I guess…you’re also a happy single detective the women are crazy for? Akane would willingly become your bride!”
Resting his chin in his hand, Iwaizumi gave Oikawa some unintended soft smile.
“As I’m not the great detective you are, but just a forensic doctor who needs evidences and parameters…tell me more about you.”
Somehow, it was easy for him to be that bold with the other, making things more relaxed again. And usually he was not so straightforward in doing a Q&A with a stranger, either!
This also let Oikawa look at the shorter man with a puzzled expression, and he closed his eyes with a put-on smirk, before he stared directly in his green eyes.
“Akane-chan is so lovely, but she’s too young for me, don‘t you think so?” he joked.
“Seems so. She’d rather be some kind of annoying but cute little sister” Iwaizumi simply added with a dry tone.
But then, Oikawa stopped talking, as if he was questioning himself, whether to continue speaking or not.
“I actually had someone…but, as you know, things can be hard sometimes. So I preferred to focus on my work and having no distractions.”
The detective played absent-minded with the cutlery and it seemed he didn't want to reveal more for now.
Sensing the uncomfortable situation they got in, and because Iwaizumi also noticed that Oikawa did hesitate before, he made a cut there. He accepted the answer as it was, changing the subject a bit.
“And…what else can I expect from the great detective Oikawa? Hobbies, favourite food or kinks?” he smirked.
“Why do you want to know so much about me, when not even a couple of hours ago you were insulting me and getting annoyed by my presence, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa threw back, immediately laughing at him.
Somehow, he felt really at ease with Iwaizumi, even if he didn't intend to, even if the topic before wrenched his heart again.
“Perhaps I can use your own words against you later?” Hajime kept the game going, but chose to scold him anyway,
“Especially when you laugh at me!”
But he had to too, showing his brightest smile, because...Oikawa was right.
“So maybe you can tell me, why you are sitting with me here, at the same table, when I am an ordinary incompetent crime scene destroyer for you in the first place?”
“Tsk, you were hungry, I was too, so I think I'm doing you a favour?! And you were an ordinary incompetent crime scene destroyer. But now that I know who you are and how you work…you’re not as incompetent as I thought” Oikawa smirked back, and raised his chin a bit to prove his supremacy.
“Okay, touché” Iwaizumi chuckled, “But same goes for you. Your skills are more than recognisable. I guess working with you can be really satisfying.”
Then Osamu approached them once more, handing them their dishes.
“Thank you!” the forensic doctor looked up to Osamu, smiling at him properly, but was immediately distracted by the plate of his opposite.
“Thank you, Samu-chan” the brunette said and his eyes lit up as soon as he saw his favorite food in front of him: milkbread, and obviously some onigiri, because Osamu was the best in making them.
“Milk bread? So...you’re a sweet tooth?” Iwaizumi finally stated in surprise and looked down to his own plate.
Osamu had decided to pour him a bowl of finest miso soup, and onigiri of course. A good choice, because it was already late for a heavy dinner and the soup would make him feel warm in no time again.
Wishing each other an 'Enjoy your meal', they started digging in and Iwaizumi couldn't believe how freaking good it actually tasted.
Starving for food, Oikawa started taking big bites of his milkbread, devouring it all and went on with the onigiri.
Still, he sometimes needed to look up to Iwaizumi, because it was more than cute how he ate his meal with all that acknowledgement and deep respect for Osamu’s cooking skills.
The detective couldn't do anything else, but smiling for a few seconds. However, his happy expression froze suddenly and, lost in thoughts, he stared at his own empty becoming plate, being unwillingly serious.
“Wow, it’s more than good!” Hajime absolutely didn't notice the change in Oikawa’s mood, as he was so addicted to the soup and onigiri, “I can’t remember that I've eaten such a delicious miso soup in ages! And the onigiri are really something too! Thanks for taking me here, really!”
He even forgot his manners and spoke with a full mouth, as he could be pretty easy to be pleased with delicate food.
But when the detective didn't respond in his usual comical way, rather staying silent, which irritated the forensic doctor totally, his eyebrows knitted a bit.
“Hey...everything’s alright? Oikawa?!” he tried to bring him back into reality.
Blinking, the aforementioned finally returned to the present…or at least stared at the other.
“Uh? Oh, yeah, yeah…so you liked it?” Oikawa said quickly, smiling widely, “Osamu is the best chef of the entire city!”
He found his composure again, and his smile turned to a more genuine one as he spoke, “You really should smile more, you know?”
Iwaizumi almost choked. Going red all over his face for that compliment, but also because of those really adorable lift-up lips, he reached with his arm slowly across the table…stopped in front of Oikawa’s forehead and then…snapped two fingers against it. Of course, Oikawa stared at him, shocked, but then just bursted into a laugh. He could not stop at all and nearly cried. His stomach started hurting, too.
“Iwa-chan, you’re a meanie!“ his voluminous and warm voice filled the air, “You can’t just snap my forehead like that after knowing me for barely five hours, geez” he laughed again, then calming down a bit, gasping for oxygen and only gazing over, he noticed the redness on the other’s cheeks.
“Why can’t I?” the forensic doctor insisted stubbornly, putting down the glass, “I’d even do this after two hours, but back then I had my hands being occupied with a body. And what are you saying anyway? Stop making things awkward. And moreover, stop grinning when you‘ve been already caught off-guard!” the shorter guy tried to talk back, grabbing the glass of water and drinking two large sips before he could go on, not choking to death by a simple rice grain.
“By the way, that genuine smile suits you much more than your exaggerated ones.”
Geez...now he was making things awkward.
“Oh my,“ Oikawa chirped in a lower tone, “...does Iwa-chan like me this much already?”
It was only teasing, only playing. With his voice, his words and approaching Iwaizumi’s face. The forensic doctor's heart started pounding faster, as he looked into the other’s somehow too close face and he gulped.
“W-what? D-Do you wanna get your head slapped so bad, Masochistkawa?!”
Talking back, he clearly can...but inside, he was digging a fine hole to hide.
“Then, mind telling me why are you stuttering?” the detective smiled, not moving an inch away.
“I-I-I'm not stuttering!!” Iwaizumi swallowed, trying not to break the eye contact, “Y-You’re just really infatuati— infatigable!! I mean!! Your way of talking!!”
Shit...he didn’t notice right? What am I saying...of course he noticed!!
How could he trip over his own tongue so bad??
“Suuure” Oikawa said, smiling contently, as he eventually backed slightly away.
“Shall we go? It’s pretty late…wanna let me take you home or do you prefer going alone?” he simply changed to a normal topic, already about getting up, since they both finished their meal. Turning his head over his shoulder, he called to the chef, “Ah, Samu-chan! It’s all on me, alright?”
“Yeah, Oikawa, don’t worry about that” Osamu replied, nodding.
“Ah, n-no, wait!” Iwaizumi objected, fortunately his pulse was back to normal, as he fumbled in the inside of his jacket to find his wallet, while Oikawa was settling things.
“As I said, it’s okay.”
“I’ll...make up for it next time then!” he promised as the detective was taking his coat from the chair, “T-thanks again for the meal! It was really delicious!” he called over to Osamu, too, and yes...sometimes Iwaizumi sounded like a little kid. But things that caught his attention were always about to cause this reaction from him.
They headed off, entering the cold again but feeling much warmer than before. Standing in front of the small restaurant, that saw off his last customers for that day, Hajime exhaled, satring at the little cloud his breath was forming and turned to Oikawa.
“Um…I‘m used to walk on my own, believe it or not” he took the question up, back to normality, back to joking, “Well…which direction do you have to go to?”
“Doesn’t matter, I won’t go home yet. I’ll walk you home first, if you want to of course” Oikawa refused, while he shivered from the cold, because they hadn't start walking yet.
Iwaizumi lift his right eyebrow, “That’s what a psychopath and serial killer would say.”
With a light smirk on his lips he pointed in one direction, “Then...that way... let’s keep moving. I don’t want us to become ice cubes.”
Okay, stop Hajime! Why did you even agree to that?!
Shoving his hands in his pockets, he stuck his chin into the high collar of his jacket.
“Haha, believe me, if I were a serial killer, I would have killed many people by now, Kuroo first” the detective laughed carefree, as they were walking next to each other now.
“Woah, I thought he's your best chemistry buddy?” Iwaizumi returned the laughter.
“Yeah, but he can be such a pain-in-the-ass sometimes…”
Both went quiet for a moment.
A ping interrupted their thoughts and Oikawa pulled out his phone to read the message. Watching the detective fishing for his phone, Iwaizumi blinked twice.
“It’s Daichi-kun” Oikawa exclaimed, sounding all excited now, and his eyes were lightening up with every single word he read, “They arrested the murderer, case closed!”
“This was fast!” Hajime said in astonishment and had approached much closer for a peek on the display.
“You won’t be that surprised anymore, if you'll continue to work with the great detective Oikawa-san!” the brunette winked, full of himself and really satisfied.
“Or with Daichi-san” the forensic doctor corrected with knitted eyebrows, “He's really a reliable officer! He'll make it to the chief position if he keeps going!”
“Yeah, I think so too” Oikawa added with a smirk, “This time…it was just luck. I knew who the culprit was…maybe we won't be that lucky next time.”
As he finished his sentence, he noticed with a side-glance how close Iwaizumi got. Surprised and shocked, the detective blinked, turning his head to his side and bumped heads with the other.
“Oh…I’m…so sorry” he murmured, holding the stinging spot of his forhead.
“N-No, it‘s okay” Iwaizumi only responded, looking up again.
With those olive green eyes of his…so serious, but at the same time so childish…Oikawa couldn't get tired of that. But that was exactly why he interrupted the eye contact, better staring at the road.
“Uhm, let’s go. You have to rest. After all, you have work tomorrow” he says with a sheepish smile, as he started walking again.
Also snapped back to reality, Iwaizumi just pressed his lips together as he saw that grin and then went for another one.
“Why are you so worried for me, dumbass!” he slapped the taller man on his back, so Oikawa tumbled two steps ahead, and caught up to him, “Or wanna tell me that you’re all free and on vacation? You need to sleep too!” the forensic doctor joked.
“I wish. But you don’t seem the type who stays up late, while I am” the brunette chuckled on an act, rubbing his shoulder and running a hand through his hair.
“What am I to you? And old man?” Iwaizumi nudged his side, “I stay up late often enough. It’s just that I like having a peaceful sleep if I can.”
Which didn't seem to be very often, regarding the pillow and blanket in the laboratory.
“Maybe I’ll need that pillow and blanket you keep in the morgue sometimes!” Oikawa read his mind with another chuckle, really amused.
“I won‘t give it to you! That blanket is the best the hospital has! From the private patients’ wards!” Iwaizumi made his point and then looked ahead, “Ah…we’re almost there.”
Fortunately, because it was really fucking freezing cold! Mumbling into the collar of his jacket, that gesture didn't go unnoticed.
“You’re very sensitive to cold, uh? Here” Oikawa concluded and, only being fifty meters away from the building complex, Iwaizumi was handed the detective‘s beige scarf.
“W-what?! A-Ah, i-it’s okay, really!!” the doctor wanted to decline, “It’s right there and your coat seems colder than my jacket!”
And actually his face got really warm again...what was with this guy?
Iwaizumi almost felt like...a girl after...a date, being walked home by her crush...
“No buts! You’re so stubborn, Iwa-chan!” Oikawa complained with a sigh, as he rolled his scarf around Iwaizumi’s neck, “See? It’s not so bad…beige suits you.”
Not able to talk back, the forensic doctor had watched Oikawa with his half-opened eyes, his long lashes...but his attention was drawn to something else, now.
Warm…
His nose was stuck in the fabric, the soft fibre tickling him a bit, he felt comfortable. And there was...
A cosy smell...sweet...
"Don’t treat me like a girl!“ he mumbled, slightly embarrassed, but still unbothered by the fact that he was wearing that comfy piece of fabric around his neck.
“I would never, you’re the manliest man I know!” Oikawa chuckled.
They reached the apartment complex, standing in front of the house and looking up to it. Iwaizumi straightened his shoulders and glanced over, because he didn't know how to continue.
On the other hand, Oikawa had been freezing too…
“Well...do you...wanna come in for a coffee or a tea? Getting warm before...continuing wherever you have to go?”
“Oh, Iwa-chan is being so sweet now, uh?” the detective mocked him, but then smiled politely, clearly faking it, “Don’t worry about that! There will surely be a next time!”
Hajime knitted his eyebrows and narrowed his eyes too.
“Huh?” he said, not sure whether it was because of Oikawa‘s words or his smile, which Hajime couldn't read,
“I mean it... I don’t need to find another dead body by tomorrow.”
He then tried to undo the scarf, giving it back to his rightful owner.
“I didn’t mean to be rude rejecting your offer. But I really have to go, and I’m not a serial killer! I’m the one who finds them!” Oikawa replied seriously, then laughing.
“And” he added, when he noticed that Iwaizumi was undoing the scarf, “You can keep it. I have plenty of them.”
“Okay…”
Iwaizumi’s mouth shaped into a thin line. He was trying to think of anything else, but didn't know what exactly he should say.
“Then...thank you...for the interesting late-night dinner” he decided, resting his arms by his side now and leaving the scarf where it was, around his neck, “I’ll make up for it.”
He looked the other once more into the eyes, “And thank you...for walking me home? Hasn’t been a while” he chuckled, because it clearly was not so common that guys would be taken home.
“You don't have to do anything, I was the one in wrong there, I was ruder than I wanted to be,” Oikawa replied sincerely, “But just for researches purposes, you actually had someone who walked you home, Iwa-chan? How cute!”
“I take everything back! You’re still annoying!” Iwaizumi tilted his head, but then looked at him and...just had to smile generously, “As I said...a new start for us.”
Noticing something, the shorter one stepped closer and reached with his hand to Oikawa‘s hair.
“If anyone asks me...I’m pretty sure that Oikawa Tooru can be a really caring peson.”
Pulling out a little piece of a fallen leaf of one of the brown curls, Iwaizumi kept his smile up, “But only if the great detective wants to be revealed, else I would describe him as the talented, charming man who’s acting too arrogant, if that’s for the poker face.”
Oikawa stood there in surprise, as his cheeks reddened. He hadn't felt like this since…
“I’m not” he took a sudden step back, not wanting to make eye-contact with him. It would have been too dangerous for his heart.
Something was stopping him from getting too emotional about it, and he had to continue doing that, because…
“I don’t deserve this” he said then, smirking and ruffling his own hair.
“Gotta go, maybe we’ll catch up again in another case? Oh and, Iwa-chan…don’t give up on Yui-chan. I’m sure you’ll work out pretty well together!”
“Yeah, go on, solve some cases, busy man” Iwaizumi nodded and saw him off, “It was a pleasure to meet you, detective.”
But he didn't respond to the last comment.
The forensic doctor watched him leaving into the dark, then turned around, entering the warm building. He arrived at his flat, he took off the shoes and jacket but...it took him a longer time to take off the scarf. Oikawa‘s scent was so present in the fine wool...
Iwaizumi closed his eyes - only a second - allowing himself to get drowned by this smell.
Then suddenly snapping back into reality, he dragged it off pretty fast, but folded it carefully to put it down on the drawer in the floor. Stepping into the bathroom, he went for a hot shower, before going to bed immediately.
Making up with Yui, getting ready for the next case, tutoring Akane and maybe...their paths would cross again?
Even when he laid down, it was hard to put aside all those images he had. Of Oikawa.
The arrogant, upset face, his fake smile, his excited eyes, the perfect styled fluffy brown hair, his sincere look and his absent-minded, almost hurt, expression...
Iwaizumi was sure he had never met someone like him. Someone with so many different colours in personality.
Notes:
Here we are again, Oikawians! (like Sherlockians!...don't you know that?! Then what are you doing here, go watch Sherlock!!)
Our soft arrogant detective is hiding something and holding back...but why? What's his big secret? Will Iwaizumi discover it? Will he change his mind on the so infatuating detective?
You'll see!! ;P
Chapter 4: Goodbye, Hajime-san
Summary:
“I love you!” she blurted, rather feeling desperate than filled with hope, “I really do!”
“I know…”
“Don’t make too many people fall for you. You’re destined to be a heartbreaker, Hajime”
Yui was getting even closer. She leant in and then just kissed him pretty softly on his lips.
Notes:
When a date goes utterly wrong...you drown in a drug dealer and serial killer case! That's the spirit!
Thank you for enjoying our story, the next chapter will be...very interesting in term of feelings ;)
Chapter Text
The next day, Iwaizumi went to work, but didn't meet Oikawa, nor for another three days.
Of course, he hadn't expected to see him anyway so soon, but somehow...it was strange not seeing him at all as well.
“Ehm…Yui-san,” he began, rubbing his neck as she looked up, giving him her beautiful, lovely smile, and he felt his heart drop.
“I’m really sorry about yesterday” he apologised, stepping from one foot on the other, “That…we couldn’t…”
“It’s not your fault” she simply said, when he didn't know what else to state, “I understand. Work is important and murder doesn’t wait.”
Lowering her gaze, she stroked back a short strand of hair, “I mean…it’s not that I’m not working in that field too, right?”
“Yeah…”
“We’ll make it another time. How about Thursday, after work? Having some nice dinner?”
“O-Okay.”
It was rare, seeing her so bold, but what Iwaizumi didn't know was that Yui had talked to Akane-chan before, and although the latter was at least six years younger, she had given her the right advice to be more courageous and that she had to fight, too. Not waiting until things happen.
Nodding in surprise, Iwaizumi hoped they could make it soon. It wasn't for his liking disappointing others, especially if it came to relationships. He hadn't been into a lot in his whole life, but the more he got familiar with them, the less he wanted them. That didn't mean that he was the guy who loved having one-night stands. He just…he rather shut down those possibilities of falling too deep for someone and then not meeting the expectations.
Yui went off, having some documents collected in the office, whereas the forensic doctor gave in to the curiousity and peeked into Kuroo‘s laboratory - no one was to be seen.
So the days moved on, and Thursday arrived. He was clearly nervous now.
The last time they went out, was a month ago and it had been more a friendly encounter than anything else. Of course, he had noticed that she had dressed up, that she had worn make-up, but they treated each other like the usual. Just being a little bit more kind and friendly, but not taking a too big step and crossing the line.
Today could be different. His stomach was rumbling nervously because of that. He swallowed hard, while grabbing his jacket to get out of the morgue. When they headed off the hospital, it already started different with Yui linking arms immediately, walking with him pretty close. Her hair wasn't styled today, but still had taken her short time in the staff’s bathroom to get it neat and put on at least lipstick which suited her very well.
The forensic doctor was a bit flattered, but also felt slightly uncomfortable. He couldn't say why.
It wasn't about her presence, he liked Yui. She was a kind and easy-going woman. Still, there was something in his heart which just wanted to stop him.
His beautiful colleague was in charge of choosing a restaurant and they quickly walked the way to it.
Iwaizumi's eyes narrowed a bit, as he remembered the streets, the building around them and...slowly realised that it was the same way he had walked with Oikawa the other day to Osamu’s shop.
It would have been a coincidence to visit there again, but of course she had something else in mind. Just a few metres away from the small bistro, to a cosy izakaya.
They went inside, taking off their shoes and putting them into the shelf next to the entrance door, where every guest had to put them. Being led by a waiter to a reservated corner, Yui had actually booked that table before.
Sitting down in the lowered seating area, they put down their bags and made themselves comfortable on the pillows.
The first order was done pretty soon, they chose some sake and a few side dishes. They waited in silence, both a bit embarrassed and insecure. When the drinks arrived, Yui was greeted by the waitress, as if they have been knowing each other for a long time. Iwaizumi lifted his eyebrows, amused.
"W-What?" Yui blinked.
"Nothing," Iwaizumi smirked, "I just had the feeling that you come here often"
"Well...somehow yes," she admitted with a sideglance, as it might sound inappropriate for a woman visiting a pub on her own.
"I meet here with my friends from university once a month. It has become our little home, when we were younger and didn't want to bother our families. And a girls' nightout is great!" she laughed and the conversation started to become easier again. They chit-chatted about work, friends, hobbies and the world in general.
As he poured more sake into Yui's cup, because she had requested it, he went on for another question,
“So...I didn’t know you’re into cars?”
“It depends on the driver“ Yui giggled, clearly tipsy but also more courageous, looking up with some smile he had not seen before, “Say, Hajime...”
Gasping, he straigthened up like a student called by the teacher in class. It was the first time she didn't refer to him with some polite suffix. Her eyes looked into his, but then focus on something else…below. Next to him.
“That...scarf of yours...isn’t it quite like the one Oikawa-tantei has?”
“Y-yeah?”
He gulped down some more sake which burned in his stomach immediately after and therefore kept distracting it to rumble from sudden anxiety, “Is that so...?”
Looking at the beige scarf on his bag, they both stayed silent as if the fabric would be able to tell them secrets they wanted to hear so badly.
“He’s very handsome indeed, don’t you think so? I bet he has already a beautiful and stunning girlfriend by his side!” Yui said, laughing because of being so drunk. Iwaizumi did not reply. He already knew that it wasn't true. Oikawa was as single as he was.
A ping interrupted them. It came from his phone and so Iwaizumi took it with a quiet "Sorry" out of his jacket:
from: Akaashi
I’m very sorry to disturb your afterwork.
There's some analysis. We really need you here.
“It seems we can’t make it thise time too, uh?” Yui suddenly spoke up, as he noticed his thoughtful expression. Staring at the glass in her hand, she had a disappointed look on her own face.
“No, it’s just…”
Well, he couldn't come up with any excuse…
“I’m so sorry, really” Hajime said truefully, feeling pretty guilty about her current state and that he was hurting her feelings all over again. Yui smiled sweetly at him as she always did, and stood up. Trembling.
Iwaizumi helped her quickly to regain her balance, reaching for her shoulder.
“Just go, they need you. I can walk alone…” she insisted quietly, brushing off his hand gently, but the forensic doctor only shook his head.
“No, that will have to wait. I’ll walk you home first. I can’t leave you alone like this” Hajime replied firmly - no buts.
They put on their coats, he paid at the entrance and after helping her to get into her shoes, tieing them neatly under the hurt eyes of hers he was unable to notice, they left the izakaya and started walking back, Yui’s arm around Iwaizumi’s neck to stay in balance.
*
“Isn’t he...?” Osamu aked the costumer he was serving right now, and both were staring at the two figures walking past the window, somehow pretty close.
“Iwa-chan...” Oikawa spoke in a whisper and his lips curled up to a smile, because Hajime actually listened to him and took Yui-chan on a date.
“Wait a minute…isn’t that your scarf?” Osamu asked in disbelief, now staring at his friend who hadn't put on the beige fabric, indeed.
Oikawa didn't reply, just continued smiling.
“Sorry Samu. I gotta go!” he suddenly jumped up, putting on his coat fast and rushed outside.
“Oikawa wait, your-”
But too late. He had already left and the cup of hot green tea was the only proof he'd ever been there.
*
“Hajime, really, I can go on my own!!” Yui insisted, but on the other side she enjoyed the company, enjoyed leaning on him, “It was just a sip too much!”
“Guess two or three” Hajime mumbled.
“You know...it’s really hard getting close to you!” she then suddenly blurted, when they had almost reached her home.
The alcohol let her slip her tongue once more,
“You’re so charismatic...you’re sooo talented and it’s so great watching you work but…”
Hajime blushed a bit at her words.
“But we’ve been knowing each other for two years, only made it to two dates and...I don’t get it. You’ve refused to take valentines presents from everyone but you’re wearing that scarf, although you didn’t seem to be so fond of him as a colleague! And…I don’t get it…” her voice twisted, sounded between whiny and upset.
Something in-between, Hajime could not identify at all.
He stared at her, half-shocked, and simply did not know what to say. All of what she had said was true. He couldn't deny it.
But why was he wearing that scarf, then? Just because it was comfortable and warm?
“I haven’t paid so much attention to it“ he finally started, "and…getting to know him, he’s a great detective indeed, and he could help us with so many cases…”
“Yeah he is...he really is” she just mumbled as if he'd given the wrong answer, something she didn't want to hear at all, and kept silent for the rest of the walk.
Approaching Yui’s house, he let go of her and the warmth she felt before disappeared.
She opened her bag, getting out the key and was fumbling with it to unlock the door. Ah! Finally!
But when they were about saying goodbye, Yui turned around once more.
She would regret it for sure.
She will so regret it.
But if she didn't do it now, she never would...
“I love you!” she blurted, rather feeling desperate than filled with hope, “I really do!”
The now broken silence made Hajime swallow hard. He needed a moment, which for Yui felt like an eternity, but then he gave her a sad smile, having his hands in his pockets.
“I know…”
Yui only glanced at him, trying to understand what he just said. What he meant…and…got it.
It has always been like this. Lowering her gaze, she nods lightly. Then, she stepped towards him, stopping only a few inches right in front of him, so she could see his face.
“I...have the feeling it's not worth fighting…we can’t make it work, can we?” she whispered, “I noticed how uncomfortable you sometimes seem to be with me…”
“T-thats not true-”
“I know it is! Not because of me” she cut him off with a smile and stood on the top of her toes now, supporting herself with her palms against his chest as she still was drunk and couldn't hold the balance totally on her own.
“And I hope…that you, one day…can fall in love. Maybe even with me, if I’m not a happily married woman by then!”
Hajime couldn't smile about that bitter joke. He felt her warm breath hitting his skin, but he didn't flinch.
“Don’t make too many people fall for you. You’re destined to be a heartbreaker, Hajime” she went on, but then became serious again.
“Thanks for spending time with me. Thank you for…trying to like me.”
Yui was getting even closer. She leant in and then just kissed him pretty softly on his lips. Just as this, nothing too intimate. Just a soft kiss as a real goodbye.
Getting back on her heels after a few seconds, she looked at him once more into his eyes, then turned around and went inside.
Tears…
Hajime clenched his hands to fists inside his pockets. He had allowed her to do so.
Maybe she wouldn't remember anything at all by tomorrow, because of an hangover, but on the other side...that was all he could give to her.
*
When he arrived at the hospital, he didn't seem to realise that he'd been walking with a thoughtful expression. When he crossed Kuroo’s way, he was greeted with a surprised look.
“Hey, Iwaizumi…you look like you’ve seen a ghost” the chemist commented with some test tubes he needed to examine under his arm.
“Kinda…uh...where’s Akaashi?” Hajime snapped back into reality.
“In the analysis lab, go and save him. Tooru and Akane are about to drive him crazy!” as Kuroo said so, he passed the forensic doctor. No time for chatting!
But Iwaizumi’s eyes had widened. What was Oikawa doing there?
He chose to swap his outdoor jacket for his doctor’s coat, before entering the lab. It would have been more than inappropriate to enter the lab in his street clothes and especially with Oikawa’s scarf on. Akane would have gone mad if she saw that.
Iwaizumi didn't even open the door as he heard the annoying loud voices. When he got closer he noticed a tired Akaashi shaking his head, and clearly not able to stand them anymore.
“Iwaizumi-san!” he exclaimed, relieved.
Akane and Oikawa went silent immediately, staring at the forensic doctor who had his hands in his coat’s pockets.
“Iwa-chan! It's nice to meet you again!” Oikawa chirped, cheerfully.
Iwaizumi looked up to both of them, then he exchanged looks with Akaashi as he walked up to the group.
“You wake up my deads with your noisy talk!” he was just as grumpy as ever in front of the detective and sighed,
“Hasn’t been a long time” he nodded to him and started focusing. He needed to distract his mind anyway.
“So, what do you need me for? Some analysis, it was?” he glanced to Akaashi and took the obvious papers from his desk to read through them.
Akane glances to her mentor, raising an eyebrow. It was late and everything, but he looked somehow...devastated?!
And she was not the only one, who noticed though.
“What’s with that long face, Iwa-chan? You’ll get wrinkles if you keep frowning like that!” Oikawa commented and put his hand in his own coat’s pockets.
“I don’t make a long face!” Iwaizumi only mumbled but he was already overheard by the detective.
“It's me who actually needs some analysis. Kuroo was busy, so I asked Akaashi-kun to do it for me, but he said he wasn’t in charge at all...”
“I see...then tell me about it.”
He looked to Akane and Akaashi, “Wanna assist then, or...already on overwork?”
Akane smiled with a glimpse of hope in her eyes, so she could experience something pretty cool working with both experts.
“Actually I am, but-“
“Then you head home!” Iwaizumi clearly instructed, not hearing her out at all. He continued, “I need the fresh brain of yours tomorrow morning! Get some rest and get ready for the part-examination, focus on the head and cervical region.”
Akane first pouted, but then her face enlightened, hearing the better compromise which was given to her. Being on a real autopsy on her own!! What a great chance!!!
“Y-yes!!” and so he didn't need to ask her a second time, as she waved them a goodbye and rushed quickly out of the room.
“It’s her first time doing this tomorrow, right?” Akaashi wanted to know, astonished by her energy although it was so late.
“Yes, it is” Hajime simply replied, flipping the pages of the document again.
“Okay, if you don’t need me...I still have to do something in the lab next door…“
“Just go on. I don’t want you to delay your work.”
There it showed up for the first time, that Iwaizumi really took the responsibilty for his coworkers well-being, and that he was a good team leader too. At least for his team.
Oikawa stared at the forensic doctor in amazement, as he gave orders to them, being the chief he actually was. Amazing. Truly amazing.
Seeing Akaashi leaving, too, it was only about him and Iwaizumi, now.
The latter rubbed his eyes for a moment and turned to the detective.
“Sorry, if Akane went overboard. So...what is everything about?”
Oikawa shook his head, getting rid of the thought just a second ago and instead asking Hajime back.
“You tell me. How did the date with Yui-chan go?!”
Getting startled, the forensic doctor looked at him in surprise but also in shock, “How did you...when?!”
He blinked at him in confusion. Was he some kind of fortune teller or what?!
Oikawa sighed deeply, obviously disappointed.
“Iwa-chan, how many times do I have to tell you I’m a detective?!”
“Doesn’t mean, you have to have your eyes everywhere.”
Iwaizumi put down the documents in his hands, staying as neutral as he could.
"So you’ve seen us…Then maybe you know how it went…"
Remembering the moment they passed by Osamu‘s, it was crystal clear now, how Oikawa was about to know, "Being at Osamu‘a place again?"
“Yeah, I was at Osamu’s. But I haven’t followed you, I’m not a stalker!” the detective said, a bit offended, because it sounded like an accusion.
“I didn’t say you are" Hajime stayed calm, maybe a bit too calm, already forgotten what the papers he had read was about.
Smirking, Oikawa was pointing at Iwaizumi’s lips with his finger.
“Well, but still I can tell, you got a reward…how was the kiss?!” he asked curiously.
Iwaizumi's jaw muscles tensed a bit, and he wiped off some maybe still lingering lipstick off? There was not any...Oikawa had tricked him to get his proof! Bastard!
“None of your business!“ the forensic doctor snapped angrily, but after a few seconds he added almost inaudible, “She gave up. There’s no point in working on something which will never succeed.” Swallowing, he exhaled “...I’m an asshole, I should have quit it sooner before she had her hopes up.”
Turning his back to Oikawa, he walked over, getting some gloves from the box.
“As you said, work is my wife” he was trying to make a joke of himself, “So it was just a goodbye-kiss.”
Clearly shocked about his furious reaction, Oikawa lowered his chin.
“Sorry, you’re right. That’s none of my business” he replied seriously and understood that he had crossed a line.
“I just…hoped you could get some happiness from her, she’s a nice girl after all.”
Then he turned his back to Iwaizumi, too, speaking again before he was about to leave,
“I think it’s not the right time today for you. I’ll wait for Kuroo for those analysis I needed.”
“W-what?! Come on, you let me come here all the way for nothing!?” Iwaizumi blurted in disbelief and quickly approached him, grabbing his sleeve, “Just tell me what you need as I’m already here?”
He didn't want to sound too pleading, but he noticed that his mind was almost shouting 'Keep me occupied!!' and therefore he was. Letting go of Oikawa, embarrassed, he backed away.
“Sorry...I’d just feel better doing something useful now, rather than going home and...well you know...start overthinking” he mumbled.
It always helped him, getting to work.
Not getting rid of problems, of course, but afterwards, he usually was able to be calmer than before, relax.
Oikawa lifted his eyebrows and his eyes widened a bit, as he did not expect such a desperate reaction from the forensic doctor.
“I wasn’t the one who called you, Akaashi did,” he then smirked, excitement sparkling in his eyes, having something in mind.
“Since you want to be occupied, then…come with me!”
Not waiting for an answer, he was rushing outside the room.
Getting busy! Getting things done! Yes!! It was as if Oikawa’s excitment jumped on Iwaizumi in no time, so he let himself to be actually dragged outside.
“Kuroo!” the detective shouted all over the lonesome corridor.
“Yeah? No need to shout, Oikawa!” Kuroo replied loudly too, exiting the lab.
“I want those analysis ready when I come back!” Oikawa just ordered, then tugged Iwaizumi by his sleeve with him again.
“O-Oikawa, what are you-?!”
“We, Iwa-chan and I, are going to solve a case!” the detective exclaimed excited and hewas walking so fast that Iwaizumi could barely grab his jacket from the hook on the wall - with the scarf hidden inside - as he had to follow the other man while running.
“And you‘d better put your jacket on and don't hold it, it‘ll be freezing outside soon!” his newly partner nodded to the blue jacket, Iwa was still holding in his free hand, as his other was intertwined with Oikawa's now. They would be faster that way!
The forensic doctor blinked twice, irritated by the warm fingers that were holding his, by the fast pace the detective had with his goddamn long limbs, and also because of his outer clothes the brunette was speaking about and...
The scarf! Shit!
"Y-yeah...it’s cold” he stammered and tried to play for time, but there was not a way?
And he could not put on the jacket without...well, maybe he could!
Releasing his hand off of Oikawa’s, Iwaizumi put on the jacket in an unconvential way. Getting with his arm through the sleeve and feeling his hand hitting the scarf. But trying to avoid the smooth fabric, he curled his fingers around and somehow managed to get through the sleeve without dragging the beige thing out.
That was pretty uncomfortable, but...it cannot be helped!
Doing the zipper and closing the jacket to the top, they had reached the exit by now.
Oikawa couldn't stop himself from staring at the figure next to him, observing carefully, like a detective would do.
“Iwa-chan…you've gone fat!” he commented, confused, “A little walk will help you, let’s go!”
Was he joking? If so, it was a bad one!
But grabbing the other male's hand again, they quickly walked through the streets of the city. Excitement was something that pumped Oikawa’s blood faster than the usual 70 milliliters per minute. When he was like this, nothing could stop him.
Iwaizumi's blood was also boiling - but not because of excitement.
“You’re such an...!”
He swallowed his insult and only snorted. Nevertheless, it was also very impressive watching Oikawa’s back, his proud stature, his broad shoulders and the fluffy hair, always so perfectly styled...looking so pretty soft...was it maybe?
Shaking his head Iwaizumi was in (good) hand of the other and because of his fast pace, he squeezed back so he wouldn‘t lose it. Strange. Of course, he could've walked on his own, but...his body reacted automatically like this. Connecting with Oikawa.
What a downfall...was he so pitiful, just because of the date-thing with Yui, that he was in need of holding anyone‘s hand, male or female didn't even matter?!
“Asshole? Yeah, I am” Oikawa finished his sentence. He then felt his hand squeezed back by Iwaizumi and stopped like it has been some kind of signal. Turning around to look at him, who almost bumped into his side.
“Sorry” he murmured, letting go of the hand, and putting on a fake smile, “I got just, eh…let’s go” he stammered, turning his back at the shorter male and continued walking, this time in a slower pace.
Lowering his gaze...
Waiting for a short moment, Iwaizumi made only a “Yeah, I got it!”, then followed.
And as long as he went behind him, he quickly fumbled with the scarf in his sleeve, pulling it out with the other hand, throwing it around his neck, then closing the jacket as high as possible. Done.
Much better. Now it was invisible and he didn't feel like a Michelin guy or a mummy anymore.
“At least you have warm hands” he teased Oikawa and catches up to him.
“So...what kind of case is awaiting us?”
“And you have really cold ones!” Oikawa could not resist on commenting back, then glances at him.
“I’m actually working on a secret case. That’s why I wasn’t around these days. Daichi-kun suspects someone, a potential serial killer who is also…a very powerful person. It won’t be so easy to get our hands on him” he explained clenching his fists, as they were walking side by side, “But I know some people who can spill his shit out!” he added grinning, determination written all over his face.
“Sounds pretty serious” Iwaizumi got professional again, putting his hands in his pockets.
“How long...have you been chasing this guy or better...keeping up with the case?”
He raised an eyebrow.
“And...if it’s that top secret...are you sure it’s okay for you to take me with you?! I don’t wanna cause trouble for ya.”
Still he couldn't hide the fact that he got slowly excited about it too.
“I’ve been following him and his buddies for a week now” the detective tilted his head and smiled genuinely at Iwaizumi’s concern, shaking his head then.
“And I’m the one who makes the rules here. It’s my job. If I want to bring you with me, then no one has the right to complain. Daichi-kun will understand, you’ll be useful for this case too, since you’re a forensic doctor” he winked at him.
And he meant every word of it. Working with Iwaizumi was just…thrilling.
First nodding, the aforementioned then had an almost questioning look on his face, but he feels proud that he's chosen to work with Oikawa...
Ah, screw that! You’re good in your job as he is in his, so it’s only natural!
Iwaizumi tried to calm himself down. That was a normal praise!
Now listening to Oikawa, his face became more serious, as he went on talking.
“This one, Kim Seokjin…is a Korean boss and a powerful business man. I’ve studied every case and murder…there are about seven by now. At least the found bodies. He usually leaves a sign on his victims, a little flower cut with a knife. Pretty creepy for a delicate figure like a flower.”
“A flower brandmark? Maybe we should look for some woodcutter instead.”
“Funny, Iwa-chan. But that’s not all. He sedates his victims with drugs before killing them, and those aren’t simple drugs you can get from any normal drug dealer…It’s a drug produced by him. And when I say him, I mean his buddies. He doesn’t like getting his hands dirty, what a coward.”
Widening his eyes, Iwaizumi swallowed,
“His own drug? Wait...what the fuck...?! How much influence does he have that he can get away with murder and drugs?! As far as I know the Korean police is usually strict and sometimes even stricter than the Japanese one?!”
“Yeah, he’s actually more powerful than you can imagine. But we’ll put him in jail together!”
They had walked down a proper part of the city centre now, turning left and right and ended up in an area, which wasn't very familiar to Iwaizumi. Dirty, more unoccupied. Abandoned buildings. A few left for construction work which had never taken place. No people on the streets. That kind of area which meant that it was quite dangerous to be there alone at night. They stopped in front of one of the abandoned buildings.
“We’ll talk with some junkie friends, shall we?”
That was way more interactive than he'd been within the last four years.
Usually, Iwaizumi was called after some murder, not before the next would occur. And certainly, he hadn't have a talk with a drug seller or...producer, too.
Chapter 5: The sake spills it all out
Summary:
“By the way...what kind of cologne do you wear?”
Oikawa paused and then…he had to smirk. His eyes half-closed, he clearly thought of something…
“Wanna inhale it up close?” he asked with a flirtatious undertone.
“W-what?!”
Notes:
This is a quite long and interesting chapter, we hope you enjoy it! And thank you so much for all the support!
Will our boys find out some proofs? Will they solve the case...of their own hearts?
Chapter Text
An awful smell of smoke and alcohol filled their lungs as they entered the building. They crossed the floor on which had fallen some parts of the ceiling down, and some junks and memos were flattering around. Heading to some entrance hall, Oikawa was leading the way, and there they were, the unwanted people of society: junkies, sitting on some ruined and old couches or against a wall. Some of them giggling, others fumbling with their drugs and a lot of them pretty high.
It was pretty disgusting and also sad to see people ending up like that: hopelessly drug addicted, that would die one way or the other. Maybe because of overdose. Maybe because of infection, handling stuff not on an acceptable hygenic level, as they simply couldn't.
Scruffing his nose, Iwaizumi avoided eye-contact as he shouldn't get attached to any of them.
“Hey, man!” someone‘s voice called happily through the hall and both men looked up. A man around their age, with short rose-brown hair came down the half-broken staircase and was opening his arms for an embrace.
“Makki! You’re doing great!” Oikawa just walked up to him, hugging the guy, as Iwaizumi looked at them in shock.
“What brings you here? And who’s this little man?” Makki asked, raising an eyebrow and pointing over to Iwaizumi.
“He’s my assistant, Iwa-chan. Iwa-chan, this is my friend Makki!” Oikawa simply introduced them to each other, taking a step aside, and for the forensic doctor's liking he was a little bit too...cheeful while doing so.
But there was something more which nagged him:
Little man...?! Assistant...?! Really?!
He looked at the stranger, nodding over to him.
“Nice to meet you?” he suggested as it was a pretty unconventional meeting there, but actually made it to pull out a grin of Oikawa’s acquaintance.
“So...let me guess...wanna close another case? No, don’t say anything!” Makki waved his hand and pointed at Hajime’s chest as if he held a gun, “Drugs?”
The forensic doctor tilted his head, slightly annoyed. As an assistant and moreover not knowing too much about this case, he’d better let Oikawa speak.
“I don’t need them today, Makki. Let alone Iwa-chan, he’s a respectable man” Oikawa said, making Makki understand not to make fun of Iwaizumi.
“We’re here for a case, yeah. Kim Seokjin” he added then, seriously.
Makki’s smile dropped immediately.
“Wait, you mean…that Kim Seokjin?!”
“Yeah”
“You’ll get in trouble, you know” Makki swallowed with anticipation, really concerned about his friend.
“Could you help me or not?” Oikawa dared, with hands in his pockets.
He just wanted proofs, facts and information. No need for a lecture. Just everything that could lead him to the culprit.
Whereas Iwaizumi eyes ping-ponged between both men. Somehow he was impressed, that Oikawa had actually stood up for him before, but he was also pondering about his drug anwer:
Not today...?
So...was he here on some other days? Actually buying drugs or consuming them?
Watching the conversation from the sidelines, he cleared his mind on that topic and concentrated on the more important one right now: that Korean man, with whom they would step into dangerous territory, if not in a mine field.
“My my...you’re really...” Makki sighed, then turned and waved, “Come with me. I don’t wanna talk here.”
They went upstairs, to the private rooms. The staircase was rusty, dirty, just like an abandoned building should be. Iwaizumi did rather not use the handrail, as it looked as devastated as the rest too, but also because there were a lot of imprints and strange spots, he didn't dare to ask about their origin. Here and there were some scattered papers or utensils... Seriously, have never ever someone getting sick or infected here?
The first floor led to different rooms, mostly without doors. Once they stepped in, some old wooden drawers and a desk, an old office chair and documents were to be seen in the more or less dimmed lighted room. It seems that the adminstration stuff took place there: stored stuff, orders, payments. It looked really organised in contrast to the rest of the building.
Makki closed the door behind them.
“So…we actually have one or two people who are in contact with his buddies,” Makki told them, “You won’t get to him in person. Not as long as you don’t kill them and the whole network around him. Infiltration is the worst, still the best we can do... He’ll be here in Tokyo next week as someone told me. Having big business - don’t ask me what. We...can help you getting the right IDs, invitations and stuff, but that’s it. Nobody wants to end up as his new piece of art.”
“Okay, and where will it be?” Oikawa asked, accepting his offer, almost satisfied about that answer.
“In a very luxurious villa, I’ll get you the address. But...” Makki stopped, staring at Hajime with a serious expression, “Do you really want to bring him with you? You’ll put him in danger, too…”
Oikawa’s eyes widened. He...hadn't thought of that. It had been so natural, working with Iwaizumi as the forensic doctor he was, that he really had forgotten about something so essential. Bringing Iwaizumi with him…it might have been useful. But the last thing he wanted was to put him in serious danger. Risk his life.
He didn't want it to end like the last time…the last time when…
He looked at Hajime, his brown eyes drenched in worry. More than worry. Panic. Something which couldn't be described.
As nobody said anything anymore, Iwaizumi took a step forward, exhaling. He was pretty aware of Oikawa's expression, but he had enough of this. He lifted his arm and suddenly snapped the detective against his forehead, who looked at him in disbelief – he did it again!
“What’s with that face, Trashykawa? I’m pretty familiar with serial killer profiles and also that this murder part is final” he looked up to Makki, “Thanks for your concern, but...I’d rather make my own decision.”
And Iwaizumi took another step forward, a third and then stood directly in front of Oikawa. Defending the detective‘s first intention on taking him here.
“Just for your record: my team has already been intoxicated by some letter bomb in the past too. We have almost crushed down a ruinous rooftop, looking for evidences, and I had the premier Kobayashi on the stretcher after food poisoning. I’m not the guy with the black belt in Judo, but I’ll keep my sprint record around 10.6 seconds. If you need my analysing skills, it could be even faster. So...would you rather send him out alone or have at least someone by his side, who is familiar with stuff like that?”
Makki looked at Oikawa, then to Iwaizumi, confused and puzzled but…eventually showing a smirk. Letting the assistant having his speech, but then patted Oikawa on his back.
“I like this one.”
He walked over to the desk, looking for some documents now and added in the meantime: “I’ll send you everything later. The party is on Saturday.”
“Thank you, Makki. Really!” Oikawa gave back with a determined smile.
*
Oikawa lead the way again, and having him in front of his own, the forensic doctor could keep his eyes on him, thinking something through…
He hadn't get what Makki meant by “I like this one”, but he dropped this topic like the aforementioned drugs. What was more concerning was…his expression.
Iwaizumi couldn't forget the worried face of the detective, as it was one of the rare occasions that his walls were down.
It hadn't been for long, just a few seconds, but long enough to be noticed.
His eyes so…angsty, so shocked, clearly thrown back to something Iwaizumi wasn't about to know.
Standing in front of the building, Hajime snarled, feeling a sudden cold breeze reaching under his jacket.
“Gosh...have it just gotten colder?” he murmued, subconsciously pulling the scarf from under the collar more to his nose, to hide every part of bare skin from the cold.
“I...hope I didn’t offend you” he then said, realising how bold he had been...
Maybe even cocky with his speech before?
“Usually, I’m not like this...well...”
But being mistaken as an incompetent always upset him! At least, this was what he was telling himself.
“You didn’t. And I know how stubborn you can be, I remember our first day on a crime scene very well, actually!” Oikawa joked, snapping back into reality, as he had been lost in his thoughts for the way outside.
But when he heard Iwaizumi speaking, he turned his head to him and...realised.
Wait…was he…still wearing his scarf?
His eyes enlightened.
“I-Iwa-chan…is that...?”
Honestly, when he had seen Iwaizumi wearing his scarf while he was with Yui-chan, Oikawa was kind of happy too.
And when he and the forensic doctor left the hospital earlier, Iwaizumi didn't have it around his neck, so he just thought he had gotten rid of it or given it to the cute female.
But here he was, wearing his scarf again.
Iwaizumi had been hiding it under his jacket until now…how cute.
Iwaizumi didn't catch the reason why Oikawa seemed suddenly so…happy about their conversation, so he concentrated on his words in the first place, deciding not to get too irritated.
“Yeah...that won’t change. I can be annoying as fuck too, if I have to and if it’s necessary."
Not if he wanted to. He clearly stated that he had to. That it was necessary.
Because Oikawa, without any intention, had made him to.
But the detective still had his eyes on him. Why?
Why…what was he…
Still puzzled, his hand reached to the part, the chocolate brown irises were focused on.
He touched the scarf and…stiffened.
Okay. I’m dead. I’m seriously dead. Bury me.
Iwaizumi tried to act normal, but of course he understood completely now, why Oikawa had been so surprised.
“It has just been…well…really comfortable, recently…” he murmured almost inaudibly, blushing in a pink tint.
No…it was more than that…
He turned red from ear to ear.
“I’m glad it has been so” the detective just said, smiling genuinely at the shorter man. He wanted to taste every moment of that picture in front of him: Iwaizumi Hajime getting embarrassed and red like a tomato.
Is he perhaps...
Argh...stop that!! Stop looking like that and making me act like an idiot, you jerk of a detective!
But Oikawa wasn't about humiliating Iwaizumi the slightest bit, and he himself knew that too...
“I won’t give it back then” he tried to act cool now, clearing his throat again, “It’s not easy to find a scarf whose wool doesn't scratch, you know.”
Good! This sounds reasonable! Now go on with some small-talk!
He passed Oikawa.
“By the way...what kind of cologne do you wear?”
Okay, this doesn‘t sound so reasonable! What the hell is wrong with me?
Oikawa paused and then…he had to smirk.
His eyes half-closed, he clearly thought of something…
“Wanna inhale it up close?” he asked with a flirtatious undertone.
“W-what?!”
Whether Oikawa had forseen that or not, Iwaizumi almost jumped to the comment and twirled around,
“T-that’s not what I-“
He shut himself up as Oikawa approached him very close.
Only inches apart now with his nosetip. Going even more intense and leaning forward, he could now whisper into the other's ear.
“If you keep being a tomato like that, I’ll have to ask Samu-chan to cook you and make a wonderful sauce!”
And just giving Iwaizumi a few seconds to inhale his cologne, the forensic doctor held his breath for a second, but the smell got into his nostrils anyway. Too easily, as it was meant to be. It caught all his senses, and a shiver he had never felt before ran down his spine.
Yeah...that was the same scent like the scarf's one. And he didn't mean the cologne...he smelt a sweet, cosy one...that one which is to be identified as Oikawa’s scent.
The detective pulled back again, grinning like the asshole he was.
Damn it!
Self defense! Stand your ground!
Iwaizumi was at a loss of words, stammering out a pitiful insult.
“No surprise that I’m red of anger, if your awful taste in cologne ruins my nose? And your nasty mouth keeps talking shit again!”
But he could already hear his blood rushing in his ears. And with that, he gave the brunette another hit on the back of his head...followed by holding his hand still, as he bent Oikawa down. His fingers slowly, almost unnoticeably, stroked through the brown curls.
Soft…
It was a nice feeling, Iwaizumi’s hand in his fluffy hair. Oikawa just wanted to stay like that forever. But he couldn't. He knew that, so damn well. Something he couldn't allow to let happen.
“Fine, fine, Iwa-chan! You’re such a rude sometimes!” he bursted out, trying to whine.
“For you always, Assikawa!” Iwaizumi barked back.
Freeing himself from the forensic doctor‘s grip, he straightened up again and so they started walking side by side once more, silence filling up the atmosphere. Iwaizumi got a bit lost in his thoughts, digging his nose subconsciously into the fabric again.
“Hey,” he suddenly began.
“You know...” and then he simply breaks off, shaking his head as if what he was about to say was ridiculous. No, he shouldn't ask. Just stay silent. He had no right to ask him about that. The reaction on Makki's mention, his panicked eyes. It was none of his business.
“Okay....what to do next? We’ll clearly have to wait for our invitation...anything else? Research? Something I should analyse for you? Some takeaway dinner?”
He mixed up all the options on purpose, linked with a slight smirk. Oikawa glanced at him: this man didn't stop to surprise him! But he took a look at his wrist watch: already 10 pm.
“I need Kuroo’s analysis, and I’ll surely have to do some researches tonight too...” Oikawa murmured and also looked a bit exhausted, but he enjoyed his work more than anything else, so it was fine for him.
“Dinner would be great now. Let’s go” he added, smiling slightly.
Iwaizumi nodded and then decided to turn the tables for today.
“Okay, come on. My treat.”
He was now dragging the detective by the arm and walking on. Dropping his head as the brunette was willed to follow, he brushed the other's hand by accident and shouted with a shocked stare:
“Geez, are you an ice cube or what?! Your hand is fucking cold!”
Without further warning, Iwaizumi took the cold hand in his much warmer one and walked a bit faster.
“Wait…it’s not fair!” Oikawa complained, but kept his mouth shut in an instant.
Yes, his hands were always freezing. When he first had held Iwaizumi's hand before, it had been unexpectedly warm. As Iwaizumi was holding his hand now, he could spill no word. He was so overwhelmed by all the feelings that were coming to light, tingling on his skin, crawling up to his core...and he didn't want it that way.
But moreover: how the hell could Iwaizumi be so bold now, when he had been the first to stutter, to blush, to react strangely?! What the...?!
“Put the other in your pocket at least, okay!?” Iwaizumi mumbled, and it seemed that being bold there was only an act.
Inside, he was still embarrassed and insecure, because of the closeness Oikawa had allowed him a second ago.
Still, it was so easy to do this. Taking his hand. How was it even possible…for now there was no explanation.
As soon as they returned to the main road, Iwaizumi walked with him to the next station. Considering the late hour and his commuter pass, he could've taken someone with him for free. It would've been much more comfortable than walking, and much faster too. Two more train stops, and the rattle of the vehicle almost made him sleepy. And even there, Iwaizumi didn't want to let go of that hand, conciously or not.
From the southern exit, they went to a side street of the good old Nakano district, known for his retro image and shopping streets. Reaching their destination, a small ramen shop – Iwaizumi's secret spot, as he told Oikawa now -, he finally noticed his action and released his hand from Oikawa’s as unnoticeable as possible.
Looking on that hand which was empty again, losing the warmth...Oikawa lost it, too. Empty. Lonely.
But it couldn't be helped. He was destined to be alone all his life, after all...
Iwaizumi gave a small sigh, as he noticed how the detective went silent, looking a bit...lost?
Taking his hand again, softer than before, he felt the fine skin structures. The almost perfect lines, fitting his own rougher palm.
“Come on,” he said in a calming voice, but with a little red tint on his cheeks, “Let’s go inside, shall we?”
He also gave the detective a soft push on the shoulder with his other hand, shoving him in front of himself, close enough that Oikawa could feel Iwaizumi's breath tickling on his neck for a moment.
“Oi, Noya!” the shorter male called over and a small head appeared immediately from below the counter, having stored something there. With a bright smile and some sweat on his forehead, because of the cooking heat, he put his hands on his hips.
“Ah, Iwaizumi! Long time no see!” the even shorter guy with the spiky dark hair and the blonde strand noticed Oikawa now, and his grin got into a mischievious one.
“What’s this? Dinner date?”
“Shuddup!” Iwaizumi hissed, clearly embarrassed, “Give us your special Noya ramen, okay? We need something really warming, the...eh...light-your-mood-up one!”
Noya nodded after a quick laughter and pointed to two unoccupied seats in front of him.
“Then take your seat and wait for the best ramen you‘ve ever eaten!”
That was a huge promise, but the ramen shop owner wouldn't do it, if he couldn't accomplish his task.
So he reached for two empty cups from the side and poured in hot green tea, handing the cups over the counter to his new customers.
“Here you are”
“Thank you” Oikawa smiled politely, as he slowly took a sip of his tea. He felt much warmer, after the hot fluid reached his stomach and began to reveal its effect to his whole body.
Furthermore, the air was also warm, filled with delicious scents of spices and sauces which tickled his senses all over.
You only could feel hungry and good with that.
“I actually have something to create the right atmosphere too!” Noya exclaimed, as he bent down once more, disappearing from the eyefield of them.
He straightened up just ten seconds after and put a small lit up candle on the table. Chuckling to himself, he left to prepare the ramen – or maybe escaping, because he knew what was about to come.
“Noya, you’re such an annoying jerk!“ Iwaizumi complained loudly, whereas Oikawa blinked twice in amusement, chuckling a bit too.
“I didn’t know Iwa-chan is such a romantic…bringing me here, offering dinner, even candles?!” Oikawa teased him even more.
Looking up, the forensic doctor spoke again.
“I’m more romantic than you think..." he mumbled with his chin resting in his hand now, "And I told you that I’d make up for it. Also...as a thank you and...argh, just enjoy this, okay?” he went quiet, way too serious.
Within a second, and before Oikawa could reply to anything, he excused himself, because he wanted to wash his hands. Standing up abruptly, he walked off. Clearing his mind, rubbing his head.
Seeing him disappear, Noya grinned and looked over to the brunette, but didn't say a word at first.
“So...colleagues, friends or actually dating?” he asked straightfowardly, out of the blue, after staring at Oikawa for a while.
People who knew him wouldn't be surprised – it's just his nature – but for a stranger it could be a very rude behaviour.
“It’s rare seeing Iwaizumi bringing someone here. He says he wants this to be kept as his safe belly-filling-place” Noya explained the intention of his previous question with a little smile.
Oikawa lifted his eyebrows as he looked at the tiny man, but smiled in understanding.
He was a friend to Iwaizumi. So, he clearly wanted to know about the companion he brought along with him.
“None of those, actually. I’m a detective, we first met days ago at a crime scene” he explained, “We didn’t start the right way…so I think he’s actually trying to make up for that, even if I told him it was fine. I know he can’t stand me, and after this he’ll be glad not to have me around anymore, haha”
“Woah, stop thinking so low of yourself! Really...I know him since teenager days and he'd seriously not bring someone here, if he can’t stand him!” Noya continued his cooking, looking down on the ingredients which were about to be sliced.
“So yeah, he's that kind of guy who wants to make things right and therefore trips over his own feet again and again but...he could invite you to any other place, don’t you think so?! Bringing someone you dislike to your favourite place and risk that you'll meet here again? Come on, my detective!” Noya laughed, but not at him. It was just his usual self, trying to make situations more relaxing.
Well…he had a point. His self-centered harrassment hadn't been so funny at all…so, Oikawa thought about rather keep talking or stay silent, but curiosity took the lead, as always.
“So…he never brought Yui-chan here, uh?”
“Yui-chan?” the chef hummed and nodded, as if he was remembering something, “Ah, Michimiya-san! Yeah...never seen him with her. I don’t know...I’ve met him during groceries the other day, and he was with her. Having some coffee or so during their break”
He peeked to the side, checking if Iwaizumi was about coming back, but then went on, quieter, so that the boiling pans behind him were louder than his own voice and Oikawa had to lean in to understand all of his words.
“Honestly, in my opinion, he has never made the impression of a happy man with her. Something was missing. You know, the girl overly in love, but the guy with his head in the clouds, totally distracted. Michimiya-san really is a beautiful and amazing woman though! I’d take her as my bride!”
Oikawa laughed at Noya’s bluntness and straightforwardness. He'd never met someone so sincere before.
“I wished they would have been happy together. They even kissed! But I guess I was wrong…Iwa-chan is so fond of his work, just like me. But getting some distraction from a cute and nice girl wouldn't have caused him pain, geez!” he commented with rolling eyes, then looked back at the shorter man.
“I think, you’re such a good friend to him, Noya-chan” he smiled, “And the smell is so delicious, I’m starving!”
“Well...actually I don’t think a girl would ever distract him enough” Noya murmured, “Right, Iwaizumi?”
He grinned as the aforementioned took his seat again.
“Babbling over my private life again?” Iwaizumi gazed towards the chef, who kept smirking, and then slammed his flat hand on the counter twice, because one thing still nagged him.
“Not quite. Rather tell your handsome Mr Detective-friend that you wouldn’t bring him here if you didn‘t like him! He doesn't’t believe me”
“W-what?!” Iwaizumi's eyes widened, looking a bit shocked, “I-I’d never said anything like that!” he stammered in his grumpy way, quickly looking at Oikawa, “And you don’t really think that, do you?”
In the meantime, Noya hummed cheerfully, turning his back to the both of them to finish the ramen.
“Sorry, if he bothered you...sometimes, Nishinoya is a pain in the ass!” Iwaizumi said it loud enough for the chef to hear, but the latter acted as if he hadn't.
“What I think doesn’t matter, Iwa-chan” Oikawa smiled.
“But” he added, not looking him in the eye, “I’m sure you can’t stand me, and you’re just doing this to make up for our first disastrous meeting. You don’t have to, really. I don’t know what came up to my mind when I brought you all along with me and put you in the middle of this damn case...you still have time to retrace your steps” his smile became faint.
“Ouch. You just hurt my feelings” the forensic doctor simply gruffed and somehow it really did hurt, so he turned around, facing Oikawa directly as they sat next to each other.
“Listen, maybe we have different opinions here, but I care about what you think” he blinked, stammering right after, “I-I mean…”
Getting serious again, he looked at him with sincere eyes.
“Don’t make yourself an asshole, just because you sometimes act like one. I don’t get this and I’m not like this. But...I surely wouldn’t bring you here. And I surely wouldn’t wear a scarf from a person I hate. And if it's just a make up and you know it...why did you even come with me?” he returned the question and raised his chin a little more.
“So you know what? You brought me with you, because you find it somehow interesting to work with me. Someone who didn’t just quit because the first encounter was a disaster and almost second degree murder. But when I say let’s start over, I mean it. I don’t need to form happy bonds with people I don’t care about.”
As it was about time, Noya put the ramen bowls with a dong in front of them.
“So stop whining, take the chopsticks and get your damn mouth stuffed, before I do it for you!” Iwaizumi finished, getting his own chopsticks and started to dig in.
The chef looked from his friend to Oikawa, slightly nodding to the detective. Oikawa glanced at Iwaizumi as if he was some kind of alien. He was the strangest human he ever came across, and still…he liked staying with him, working and stuff.
He then exchanged looks with Noya too, and smiled. He hadn't felt that warm for a long time. Chuckling, while also staring at Iwaizumi who was devouring his ramen, he finally started to eat too.
His eyes lit up: that was...
“Delicious!” he exclaimed happily, mouth full, dedicating a victory sign to Noya, who replied with a proud grin and crossed arms in front of his chest. Of course, it was! Oikawa might not know, but Noya‘s ramen was the best in the whole district!
He even got an interview about his success, recently: I just work my way out, and I‘m happy if I can make someone‘s day a little bit brighter.
Iwaizumi turned his head to the detective, as he heard his words of admiration, seeing that happy face of his and... started giggling. Once. No twice. He couldn't stop.
He turned to the other side, because he really couldn't get a hold of himself anymore.
Just like a little boy!
The giggles became laughter, but not mean ones.
He just...he couldn't explain it. Or maybe the forensic doctor could?
Oikawa’s whole behaviour was just...cute.
“Oi, oi, what’s up? I didn’t offer laughing gas here!” Noya claimed, but could imagine the reason behind, “Stop it, you’re annoying the other guests, you snickerpuss!”
He threw his small light-blue towel from the shoulder into Iwaizumi's face. It didn't help. Iwaizumi simply caught it, continuing with the laughter.
And Oikawa…it leapt to him, right into his heart, and let him burst in laughter as well after a minute, joining Iwaizumi’s amusement much more, as Noya yelled at them.
Fortunately, the other customers were understanding, just giving them some glances and shook their head with a grin, but they weren't so bothered at all.
“I-Iwa-chan, you should stop or else...I can’t take this anymore...!” Oikawa tried, not knowing how to stop himself from laughing and already holding his stomach, because it started hurting all over, his words near hiccups.
“Haha...why are you laughing anyway?” Iwaizumi shed big tears and his face was so red because of the effort his body was in need to bring out all these endorphines. He pointed with a shaky finger at the brunette male, “You made me laugh in the first place, detective! D-do you know how absolutely cute you were?!”
And with that, Oikawa stopped abruptly, almost choking, and stared at Iwaizumi in surprise. Holding his breath as if he'd forgotten how to breathe.
“I…was cute?” he asked, just to make sure he heard that right.
Iwaizumi seemed not to notice, since he was so awfully trying to suppress any more laughter. But then he got that he was the only one laughing right now, he knew that it happened because…he always wore his heart on the sleeve.
So...he really said that out loud, uh...
So...he could admit it now, right?
“Yeah...” he said much quieter, taking now a sip of his green tea, “Your face and laughter...very cute.”
A large sip followed that emptied almost half of the cup...and then he swallowed. Somehow...too hard as it was just green tea.
No. No way!
His eyes went wide and he looked to Noya, shocked.
“Did you pour something into that tea?!” Hajime accused him and the chef turned around, nodding as if it was nothing to be enraged of.
“Some warm sake. Nice combination, eh? You wanted to have something warm anyway!”
No, it isn’t! Well...it is, but not...urgh...
“Did you also put something in his?!”
“Nope, you needed the little push!” the chef grinned significanty with his hands on his hips.
While Iwaizumi had an argument with his friend about getting drunk and how that wasn't okay, Oikawa had to deal with his own problems: he couldn't stop blushing! He turned away, avoiding eye-contact with Iwaizumi at all, and pressed desperately a hand on his chest.
Damn it! Stop it! Stop pounding! What the hell is going on with you?! - he thought, directing his thoughts to his heart.
It was racing like crazy, and his blood was pumping too much through his veins too, letting him feel on fire.
Damn it, Iwaizumi Hajime.
“Damn you, Noya!”
Iwaizumi mumbled something inaudible too, but then returned his focus on his food and on Oikawa who...had turned away? Irritated, he put a hand on the other’s shoulder, leaning in to have a glimpse of Oikawa’s face expression.
“Hey...are you okay? Did he put something strange in your tea too?!” he asked in a worried, lowered voice. He didn't trust Noya there, with his devilish smirk.
“N-no, I’m pretty fine, Iwa-chan!” Oikawa stuttered, pushing Iwaizumi’s hand gently away.
He tried to calm down and finally, after two long breaths, he succeeded. Even if it was only a little, he would be able to deal with it now.
“Okay?” Iwaizumi blinked in irritation and he was sure that he saw some red cheeks for a second.
“Noya-chan it was delicious, I’ll surely come here again!” Oikawa stated to change the subject. Having finished his ramen with some more fast and big chews, he drank up half of the soup after the compliment too.
“Thank you too, Iwa-chan…for taking me here” he added in a lower but happier voice, smiling slightly.
A warm shiver ran down the forensic doctor's spine and for a second he almost forgot who and where he was...almost asking for Oikawa to speak like that again. In that lower tone, with that beautiful smile...
“Always welcome” Iwaizumi smiled shyly back, nearly whispering.
Pulling out his wallet, he gave Noya the right amount of money and thanked him for his great service...and the unwanted sake.
“Oikawa-san, please take care of yourself! He can be very clingy when-“
“Don’t spread lies!! Geez...”
Iwaizumi got up, slightly embarrassed about Noya‘s words, and seeing it as the final sign to leave. Putting on his jacket, zipping it harshly. However, as he took the scarf, he wrapped it really carefully around his neck.
“I will, Noya-chan, see ya!” Oikawa greeted the chef, as he had put on his coat, too, and they left the little restaurant. Inhaling the fresh cold air, which was about to fill their lungs.
Looking up to the dark sky, the slightly dizzy feeling crawled up to Iwaizumi's head. The usual one, which will get you because you had been in the warmth and had too much alcohol.
Standing in silence for a moment, the detective tilted his head.
“I’ll walk you home. That way, right?” he pointed at his right.
Lowering his gaze, Iwaizumi looked at him...then smiled somehow happily and patted the other's shoulder.
“Well, if you want to...right” but he started walking the other way, “Let’s make a little roundabout route, okay?”
Oikawa stared at him, dumbfounded and confused by his behavior, then ran to him and grabbed him by his jacket slightly.
“Hey, wait...your apartment is the other way!”
He sighed, as the forensic doctor continued his smiling, a bit dizzy by the alcohol he had before.
“You really can’t take sake, can you Iwa-chan?” Oikawa said more to himself than to the shorter man, “Let’s go, and no buts. I need to take you home safely! I have to do some more researches tonight, so let’s get this quick” he was already dragging him the other way.
“W-what?!” Iwaizumi stumbled, “I wanted to show you something...don’t you have five minutes?!”
He nearly pouted - and yes, Iwaizumi Hajime could pout! - trying to stop their motion.
“It’s really close! Really !” he emphasised, sounding like a child who wanted just one more turn on the carousel.
And he was waiting impatiently, tapping with his foot, crossed arms.
Oikawa looked at that adorable man in front of him. Unbelievable. Was he…sulking?
Seriously?! - he thought, and Iwaizumi was so cute at the moment, that his heart skipped a beat again. Geez…he would have never imagined he would feel that way again. Nor listening to a drunk man...
“Okay” the detective sighed, defeated, letting Hajime take the lead to that something he wanted to show him so badly.
As Oikawa agreed, the forensic doctor grinned now like his five-year-old self, who was happy about catching some bugs.
“Nice!” he chirped happily, taking the other's hand and dragging him steadily with him.
It felt so right, Iwaizumi’s hand in his...
“And finally your hand is much warmer!” Iwaizumi chuckled, while walking on, “The ramen is really good, uh? Noya took over his grandfather’s shop right after school, learning under him and so...the receipts are still the same. They always tastes like when we were kids! And it’s so warming! Not only for the empty stomach, but for the heart. Don’t you think?”
He was babbling, but it sounded much slower for Hajime's distorted perception.
Oikawa listened carefully to his story, smiling at the male in front of him, even if he didn't notice.
Going around the next corner, a stone stairway led to the upper zone, and therefore...
“Careful, don’t trip over!”
“Shouldn’t you say that to yourself?” Oikawa laughed when Iwaizumi told him.
When they stood on the top of those stairs, a larger temple area was to be found. Of course mostly dark as it wasn't occupied around that hour.
A paved way led to the temple itself, but also…to some outlook plateau.
“Here we are” Hajime announced, walking straight to the plateau, where there was also a bench. The view of the city was marvellous, the Tokyo tower, the sky tree, everything...
That was the most beautiful view Oikawa had ever seen in his life. His beloved city…all under his feet now, enlightened by the infinite lights and the stars above them. The stars…he loved them so much, he didn't remember the last time he stopped by and looked up. Even if it was only for a few minutes to watch them properly.
Iwaizumi gave it his attention, slightly smiling, but still holding Oikawa’s hand. That was his second favourite place. The real secret one, where he could relax, calm down. Sometimes, he just sat there, all by himself. Alone. Really enjoying the solitude.
Because it wasn't the same as loneliness.
However, he didn't want to look at the city that night...not for that long, though. He side-glanced to Oikawa, watching him staring at the scenery in astonishment. Totally absent-minded, because...yeah, Iwaizumi knew that he saw this for the first time. The sparkling in his eyes, almost holding one’s breath. He knew this feeling too well.
“Get yourself distracted for a moment, okay? Enjoy the view...you won’t get it anywhere else in town” he said quietly, getting a bit more serious, "Don’t get me wrong, but I...have the feeling you somehow rush through everything...”
And Iwaizumi was more than right. He rushed through everything and didn't leave some time for himself.
That had been for a long time now, because he promised to himself to dedicate his life to his work, and only to his work.
“You’re right” the detective replied, Iwaizumi now staring at him, “But I just don’t have time to sit here and there and all that stuff” he added, sighing.
While looking up at the stars, a nostalgic smile spread across his face.
“I love the stars so much, but still...I never look up at them.” He closed his eyes, filling his lungs with the fresh night air.
There they are.
Those damn feelings he had buried deep down and hadn't let them being touched by anyone.
“You should take your time...time to sleep, to calm down, to...yeah, just sit here and watch your so loved stars. This isn’t wrong” Iwaizumi almost whispers, looking at him with knitted eyebrows.
“Take a break. Even if it’s just for those damn five minutes. You’re not a machine. You need to recharge from time to time.”
Actually he wanted to ask what was occupying Oikawa so much, but he didn't think that he was in the right position to do so...so he just tried carefully.
“I just can’t. It would be a waste of time” the detective replied, sighing.
Obviously, Oikawa Tooru is used to people not understanding him.
“And don’t worry, I don’t need recharge or…whatever it is. I’m used to this for a long time now” he added, even if his features told otherwise. Even if he was exhausted. But he didn't want Iwaizumi to know.
What the...
“Ah, shut up!!” Iwaizumi suddenly bursted louder than intended, breaking the peaceful silence, “Who do you want to fool here?! You look exhausted as fuck! When was the last time you slept properly?! You’re running from A to B, you don’t even know how to stop anymore, because you’re like a marathon runner who overcame the signs of collapsing! Damn, did you even eat properly?!”
He went into mom-mode and noticed that he was also going overboard. So he exhaled, lowering his voice again.
“You’re a very good detective and I admire your determination for your job. But...don’t overdo this...I don’t have to tell you, that you will just collapse one day if you keep going like that, and...wouldn’t wake up. I don’t wanna say I understand you. I can’t, because I don’t know you. But what I know, drunken or not, is that everyone needs a break and time to recharge...and I don’t want to find you on the ground one day...dead.”
Hajime swallowed. Suddenly...some images filled his head, which let him lower his gaze, too.
He had this once. Someone who overdid. Who just couldn't rest. Who...one day...didn't wake up.
But Oikawa just lost it, when Iwaizumi bursted at him. He couldn't see the struggling in the forensic doctor’s eyes, the worry. He only felt anger and removed his hand quickly from the other's grip.
“You don’t know a thing about me!” he shouted, “Just let me live the way I want, I don’t need someone to tell me what to do!”
Rage was pumping through his veins. He couldn't stand people who tried to understand his situation, because they could have never imagined what he had been through! He couldn't stand Iwaizumi either, telling him how to behave, to take a break! Because even if he wanted to, he wouldn't be able to! If he ever decided to take a break, he would feel like a piece of shit. Useless.
Because he was: useless.
However, one was for sure...dead? Him? Never.
Iwaizumi's lowered voice calmed him though, as he continued.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m very hard to kill” Oikawa tried to joke, but the atmosphere they had before had just been destroyed two minutes ago.
Shit...he crossed a line. Gone too far...
Still looking at Oikawa who started walking again, about to leave, Iwaizumi clenched his fists.
“Yeah...hopefully” was all he responded to that joke, “I won’t tell you what to do. As I said, I don’t know you...but if I hadn’t stated it clear enough...I’d like to. If you let me. You may be hard to kill, but I’m harder to get killed by your stubbornness...whatever caused it.“
Without looking back, the forensic doctor now fastened his pace a bit, passing Oikawa and walked down the stairs again.
"If you want...I find my way home on my own. I’m sober enough.“
At least he didn't tumble down the stairs.
Oikawa stared at Iwaizumi, feeling a bit guilty. He didn’t deserve that. After all, he offered him dinner, he took him to that secret spot of his. And what did the great Oikawa do? Ruin it all.
It was his special power.
“W-Wait...” he said, running down the stairs and standing in front of the shorter male which actually looked taller than him now.
“I still want to walk you home...if you’ll let me to...” Oikawa admitted, lowering his gaze.
Iwaizumi didn't want to wait. He didn't know why but somehow, with every step he had taken walking down, his mood had also fallen. Not because of Oikawa. Or maybe because of him as a side-effect. Or because of the alcohol? Or the thought he had a few seconds ago, speaking of some unpleasant scenarios?
His heart felt so heavy, everything mixed up in his mind, and he didn't want to take it out on Oikawa, although Iwaizumi was a bit upset.
“I’m not mad at you” he said quietly, just passing him again, “I’m really not.”
Two steps ahead.
“I crossed a line, I understand this and...” he rubbed his eyes, somehow insecure, somehow overwhelmed. Shit.
In disbelief about that action, Oikawa ran after him, grabbing his hand.
Staring at the man, still half-shocked because he was...rubbing his eyes?
Why are you crying...?
His heart cracked.
He squeezed his hand, before speaking again.
“You didn’t cross anything. Once again, it was my fault” Oikawa tried to reassure him. But Iwaizumi’s mood seemed so low right now...
“I really want to walk you home. But...if you want me to leave, then just say so and I’ll disappear and make sure not to cross your path again.”
And he meant it, as seriously as he was looking Iwaizumi in the eye now.
“Ah screw it, it’s nobody’s fault here!” the forensic doctor just shouted with a shaky voice up to the sky, and he didn't know what the hell was so wrong with him.
“Damn Noya, he knows I’m no good with warm sake!” he blinked, inhaling sharply and almost made it to find his composure again, when Oikawa spoke up. Facing him and that snapped something else.
“I 've never said anything about you leaving!” he almost sounded desperate and this was also nothing to be associated with the current situation.
“Why...why is everyone so fucking eager to disappear?!”
Staring at Oikawa, Iwaizumi noticed too late, that he had mistaken reality with his past, that he was projecting that to the present, and he also noticed too late that tears were running down his cheeks.
“Fuck it...” he swore, lowering his gaze and shoulders.
The detective had stood still, confused by Iwaizumi’s words and actions.
What...what did he just say? There was actually someone who left him...alone?
Oikawa thought about his own past, seeing in Iwaizumi his previous beloved partner that...no.
That wasn't the right time to lose himself in his thoughts!
Not in front of him, not in front of a crying Iwaizumi Hajime.
He squeezed the latter's hand again, to reassure him and to say 'I’m here'.
Then, after thinking about doing that or not, he got closer, and with his free hand Oikawa just wiped some of his tears away. As he did so, he smiled at him, but it was a sad smile that says 'You’re not the one feeling like this, you know?'
Iwaizumi looked up when he suddenly felt the touch of slim fingers on his cold, tear-drenched cheeks.
Biting his lip, trying to suppress the sobbing, he finally really realised it wasn't his father who left him, not his mom who...and seeing that smile..it didn't need words. He understood.
And narrowing his eyes, looking at Oikawa...Iwaizumi suddenly returned the squeeze with one of his own, with his trembling hand and not being able to avoid the sobbing anymore.
Feeling so damn understood, although they didn't even talk about it in detail...
Oikawa had never wanted to hug anyone again. He never wanted to feel those damn distracting feelings that took him away from work.
But his body moved instinctively, as he hugged Iwaizumi tight, letting him vent, drawing circles on his back to calm him down. He didn't know what happened to him, nor he wanted to ask. But it must have been something that traumatized him. Maybe someone, he loved so much, who left him alone and disappointed.
“Iwa-chan” Oikawa tried to speak, their cheeks rubbing together as they were hugging each other.
“I won’t leave you, Iwa-chan. So stop crying, please...” his heart cracked once more, seeing his forensic doctor like this.
Having Oikawa‘s arms around him, he finally sunk in.
How long had it been, since he had felt such a sincere hug? Someone who tried to catch him, holding his head over the water? Kept him from drowning? He couldn't remember...
He could have had such a person, Yui, but he simply didn't fall in love with her, and somehow he also didn't want to let his guards down too much. He was caring for his friends, his team. He really was. But he never wanted to be cared for. Or...he wanted to be but didn't dare to.
Iwaizumi's hands reached to the other's back, holding on tightly, almost clinging on him.
Oikawa...he was so warm. His breath tickled a bare stripe of skin on his neck, tickling him. His voice was so soft...the promise he gave and Iwaizumi wanted to hold on...mixing everything up again, but as Iwaizumi said the following words, whispering them, he really meant them - to Oikawa - no ghost of the past.
“Then don’t...don’t leave me...stay...with me...”
Oikawa pulled back, smiling softly at Iwaizumi’s words. He knew that that would've never happened if Iwaizumi hadn't drank that warm sake, and somehow just broke right in front of him.
Something Oikawa couldn't let happen to him, too. He would never let his walls down, as he was fine. It was fine.
“I will” he promised, then pointed at the road enlightened by the night lights.
“Shall we...head home?” he suggested, meaning Iwaizumi’s home, obviously.
Iwaizumi only nodded, feeling so tired, feeling so devastated...and still the warm hand of Oikawa gave him so much safety...comfort...
He let himself be walked home. Dizziness overcame him. Slight headache.
The walk was slow, he sometimes tumbled a bit, bumping into Oikawas side, mumbling a 'Sorry' but didn't feel sorry at all, and just tried to let himself be lulled in the detective's warmth and scent.
Standing soon in front of the building complex, he pointed up, "8th floor."
Fumbling out the key in his jacket, he failed to hit the lock on the entrance. Swearing under his breath.
Oikawa didn't know how cute Iwaizumi could be. Even if he was drunk.
“Here” he said, taking the key from his hand and opening the door for him.
They went to the elevator, going up, and it was a hell for the drunken man, for his dizzy head. He held on Oikawa‘s sleeve, letting himself be dragged to his apartment and mumbled some more swears, because he wasn't able to do something easy like that on his own.
The detective helped him to enter his apartment. Stepping inside, kicking his shoes off, he mumbled another "Sorry that it’s chaotic here“, but in reality it nearly seemed that nobody was living there. Too clean, almost unoccupied.
Hanging on Oikawa's arm, he said that the living room was just straight ahead. Sliding to the couch then, giving a groan, he closed his eyes for a moment.
“If you want anything to drink...please help yourself.”
He was drunk, but still being hospitable. He even waved to the direction of the kitchen.
Oikawa kept staring at him, just smiling softly. He couldn't help it, he was just...so nice to him. But why?
Why was he so nice, when all he had done to him was...ruining the night and make him cry?!
“I’m fine, thanks” he just replied, then taking a look around him, observing the house like a detective would do.
There were a lot of medicine books, some plants, movies...Iwaizumi’s apartment was just like him: serious and organized, but so damn cozy.
“Iwa-chan...?” Oikawa then spoke up, looking down at him. He received only a grunt in reply.
“Are you able to go to bed alone or...do you want me to take you in? It isn’t the best idea leaving you just like that sleeping on a couch.”
“Couch is fine. More comfortable than the stretcher in the lab anyway” Iwaizumi still tried getting up again, and managed to stand, keeping his balance.
“But don’t worry. Bedroom is right...” he pointed in one direction, "...right over there!"
Taking a step.
“I won’t pass the breathalyser, but I’d walk the line straight!” he insisted, too proud to admit his totally drunken state, and then just stumbled against the goddamn couch table, bumping into Oikawa and losing balance totally, so he grabbed instinctively on the other.
“Suuure, you’re clearly walking straight!” Oikawa chuckled, catching him and holding him tight.
“I am!“ Hajime was still so stubborn and grunted, but in the end he was accompanied to the bedroom. That let him inhale a bit of that wonderful scent. The warmth...
Oikawa made him sit down on his bed, comfortably, and held him just a few seconds more.
“Then...good night, Iwa-chan” the detective whispered, letting him go and turning his back to leave.
Just as that, his hand automatically grabbed Oikawa‘s, as he was laying down in bed on his side. And suddenly the solitude wasn't solitude anymore. Knowing that he'll be alone, just in two minutes...maybe even one...
It changed to loneliness. Painful, exhausting loneliness.
Iwaizumi didn't say a word. His eyes were even half closed.
How ridiculous am I...
Oikawa turned in surprise, but Iwaizumi was about falling asleep. The grip on his hand was strong though.
Oikawa couldn't let go of his hand, not that way. He decided to stay still for a moment, just staring at the beautiful fallen asleep man in front of him. He looked so peaceful, so innocent.
Iwaizumi was such a pure person.
He didn't want to contaminate him with his dangerous work, nor with his past.
Hestitating, Oikawa then reached down to Iwaizumi’s forehead and caressed his hair.
Just for a brief moment.
“Sleep tight, Iwa-chan. You deserve that...” he whispered sweetly, then finding a way to let go of his grip.
Iwaizumi's consciousness nearly beaten to the rest he needed, he was still aware of the hand that he was holding...and feeling the soft touch, feeling the soft fingertips running through his hair...someone whispering...nothing else was needed to finally give in totally and letting slowly go...
Just for now.
Maybe he would wake up the next morning and stamp it as imagination.
As a dream.
Oikawa was about leaving the apartment in silence now, as if he had never been there.
Chapter 6: The detective who hides
Summary:
“Shall we begin our training?” Oikawa suggested, as he was looking into Iwaizumi's olive green irises now, which showed confusion.
And to confuse the other male even more, the detective reached out and placed his hand gently on top of Iwaizumi's, rubbing it a bit.
Multiple shivers ran through his body, as his fingertips touched that unknown skin, but he tried to ignore it. He was doing it just to be ready for that night at the party, right? They needed to get used to this to solve the case.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
His phone was off, since he didn't charge it in time.
His alarm clock was, too.
And then Hajime woke up...the sun had already risen fully. He looked around, irritated - how did he get there?! And why were his eyes so swollen?! And what time...
"Oh shit!" he swore loudly, nearly jumping out of bed and running to the bathroom, to have at least a quick shower.
While shampooing his hair, a blurred memory came up.
Someone stroking his hair.
What?
Shaking his head under the downstreaming cool water, Iwaizumi tried to forget about it. No way.
How should there be someone who stroked his hair?
The hell...
The shower got him at least refreshed and a little bit more awake, but he didn't have time to have breakfast or even coffee anymore, so he just ran off to work, grabbing his jacket, the scarf he got used to the last days, and he left the house, his head still aching.
*
Running into the laboratory with a fifteen minutes delay, he saw his colleagues' heads turning to him as he entered with a rueful "I am so sorry!“
"Whaaaaat? Since when do you sleep in?" Akane teased him, receiving only a gruff when Iwaizumi took off his jacket.
He looked around.
"Where...is Yui?"
"Called in sick" Akaashi simply said and...that hit him.
"Said why?"
"Food poisoning"
That clearly wasn’t. He inhaled deeply and put the jacket over his chair at the desk in silence.
"Everything’s okay?" Akaashi asked concerned, "You look...well, wrecked"
"Feel like it"
"Coffee?"
"It would be great"
Rubbing his temples the forensic doctor called himself on getting focused.
"So...was it a tough night, uh?" his assistant spoke up, as he wanted to make him feel better, bringing in some small-talk and not letting the awkward silence took place.
Akaashi had a mug of freshly made coffee standing ready for Iwaizumi, as it was always like this: coming right into the lab, having a first sip and then start to work.
"Yeah...guess so"
Taking the mug of coffee with a quiet 'thank you' in his hand, the forensic doctor drank with a long sip. Caffeine incame. Better.
But when Akaashi continued, he flinched almost unnoticeably.
"It's strange that Michimiya-san took so many days off only for a food poisoning" Akaashi said.
"How long?" he simply asked.
"Almost two weeks"
I really ruined it, uh?
Not commenting though, he stared down the black fluid.
"Okay, so...what’s going on? Akane, are you ready for your autopsy?"
"Absolutely!" she answered proudly, "I memorised every step, every definition and tool!"
Iwaizumi nodded, "Okay, then get ready. We’ll start in ten minutes."
He let his eyes wander again, "Did you hear...of Oikawa by any chance?"
He still could remember that he'd treated him for dinner, but the rest of the evening was was so damn blurred. He wanted to know if everything was okay because...he also remembered looking at the city from his favourite spot with the detective...and another blackout.
Fucking hangover.
If he wanted to know so badly, he had to ask the handsome man. That was for sure, and it nagged him.
The autopsy went really smoothly.
“Good job, Akane-san” Akaashi commented with a little applause, as the girl hyped and jumped happily because of the success and moreover the progress she made.
A little praise was not wrong and therefore Iwaizumi also nodded, and told her, that she really did well. Of course some little details were to be focused on the next time, but for a newbie, just finishing with the theory and going on with the first traineeship, it was more than good.
"Come on, have a break" her mentor smiled, "That really was good work for your first time!"
Just then, he inhaled, closing his eyes and sighed. For a little moment he gave in and let the pressure with its heavy weight drag him down. The Yui-circumstance made him ponder if he should call her later or not, but...it was clear that she needed distance. That she didn't want to meet him.
No surprise, after what happened the other day.
Maybe he should head off to the vending machine, getting another coffee? His headache had released a bit, but it was still there. And Iwaizumi still felt wrecked, too.
So going out, turning right, he passed Kuroo's labratory and heard him talk loudly.
Was he on the phone?
Actually, that wasn't the case. The extraordinary chemist Kuroo had just been doing some analysis in the lab, when the door swung open:
“What the-“ he spoke up, looking at the impostor, as his mouth swung open as well.
“O-Oikawa...?! What the hell happened to you?!” he exclaimed shocked, as Oikawa came closer quickly, and covered his mouth with a hand to shush him.
The detective was dirty from head to toe, like he had been digging in mud or something like that, and his hair wasn’t styled at all. He had eye bags, but he clearly hid them with some foundation.
“Mind explaining something?!” Kuroo whispers angrily at him, as the hand released itself a bit.
“I was doing my researches last night, as usual” Oikawa stated, but then stopped and looked seriously in his friend’s eyes, “You have to do me a favor” he added.
Kuroo stared at him, all over confused, but the other continued right away.
“Makki sent me details about that case. You have to forward them to Iwa-chan.”
“Why me? Can’t you do it on your own since you’re already here?!” Kuroo hissed, losing his patience.
“Nope.”
“Why not?!” Kuroo blurted out.
“Because he can’t see me like this!” Oikawa spread his arms as if to point to his dirty figure.
"Really, you’re such an idiot" Kuroo snapped, "Use at least some water here and make yourself not looking like a hobo!“
He passed his friend, went right out of his labratory to meet with Iwaizumi next door, as he didn't want to be the postman for the peacocky detective, but almost bumped into his colleague on the floor.
"Oh"
"Oh"
They stared at each other, then Kuroo rubbed his neck.
Bad timing.
"Is anything upsetting you?“ Iwaizumi asked, while Kuroo sighed, looking at the forensic doctor with his eye bags, hitting a 6 out of 10 on the rating scale 'who has the bigger eye bags'.
What had happened with these two?
"Yeah...some stubborn guy is keeping me occupied!“ he answered louder than necessary, but Iwaizumi didn't get the reason and looked at him with a lifted eyebrow.
"Okay, listen, I received a mail from Oikawa with details for the next case you two have."
"You did?" Iwaizumi's sceptical expression showed up, "So he’s really not around?"
"No, guess you wouldn’t like to see him anyway" the chemist tried to pull out some reaction of the other male. Something, which explained why Oikawa was acting so strange...not going directly to Iwaizumi at all.
"How come?" the latter was simply too tired to play games, and asked straightforwardly.
"Well you know, if he is absorbed in some case he’s...like a police dog" Kuroo spoke louder again, "Going all mad, crawling in mud and no sleep at all."
Now he got it.
Last night.
"You should take a break"
The argument, his drunken state, Oikawa's comfort...oh shit. Iwaizumi went pale.
"Iwaizumi? Everything’s okay?!"
*
Oikawa in the meantime sighed, as Kuroo had rushed through the door, but hearing Iwaizumi's voice now, made him hide behind one of the counters in the laboratory, hoping they would not come in.
Overhearing their conversation, he stuck out his tongue at Kuroo, even if he didn't see him, whenever the guy referred to the detective. But when Kuroo told Iwaizumi that damn last sentence, he swore in his breath.
Damn it, Kuroo! Why did you tell him that?!
There was no reply, though. Oikawa took a peek from behind the counter he was hiding, through the still open door to the floor, seeing next to Kuroo, how Iwaizumi was going pale.
Oh no.
"Yeah...yeah everything’s okay. Just...had some flashback“ Iwaizumi murmured now.
"Seems more to me as if you’ve seen a ghost?" Kuroo said worried, putting a hand on the other's shoulder, "Hangover issues?"
"Are you a freaking police dog?"
"Maybe, at least I’m an excellent chemist" Kuroo smiled.
Iwaizumi sat down on one of the three seats right in front of the labratory, in good sight for Oikawa.
"I just think...I gave him a really embarrassing impression of me" he admitted, "Fuck..."
Rubbing his palms against his forehead, he sighed again in resignation.
He'd made an idiot of himself for sure, all babbling under the alcohol like that. Maybe even telling him some stupid stuff he couldn't remember at all.
"You? Giving him? What the hell happened?!" Kuroo couldn't believe that out of all people, Iwaizumi Hajime would have done something like that. Such a sincere, responsible guy...no way!
Shaking his head, the latter really didn't want to talk about it. He didn't even lift his head, but his eyes looked up, straight into the lab...
What...?
He saw him.
The little brown curls were peeking from behind the counter.
And Oikawa knew, he had seen him.
But naively, he hoped not.
So he stayed silent in his hidden spot, not daring to make a sound and just praying for Iwaizumi to ignore him. Maybe thinking of him as an imagination.
"Ask him, behind your counter" Iwaizumi simply replied, his eyebrows were knitting now.
"Huh?" Kuroo swallowed, but the forensic doctor stood up in a quick movement and walked in the room, notiving also the dirty footprints on the floor.
"Wanna give me the briefing in person?" he spoke to as it seemed nobody. So he walked over, silently, putting his hands on the counter and bent down.
"Find you, detective!" he muttered, seeing the familiar figure of the brunette tall man curled up under the table.
Oikawa looked up like a child caught red-handed, his chocolate eyes meeting with Iwaizumi’s olive green ones.
“I-Iwa-chan, hi...” he stuttered, with a sheepish smile on his face. Defeat.
So, he straightened up. There was no point in hiding anymore.
Iwaizumi tried to keep his insecurity because of last night's events for himself, crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked expectantly at Oikawa, but couldn't stop himself from giving him an observing look from head to toe.
"Okay...do I wanna know where you’ve been?"
"No, you don’t really wanna know" Oikawa replied with a too high-pitched voice of a kid.
Iwaizumi sighed, clearly irritated. He turned his head over his shoulder now, to Kuroo, "Mind if I kidnap this guy for some interrogations?!"
"Go ahead," Kuroo made an invitational gesture and smiled.
Murmuring something like 'traitor', Oikawa clearly felt that there was no way out. Except escaping through the window like some action movie star...
Screw you, Kuroo! I’ll take my revenge!
"Come on, I was about grabbing a coffee. And you look like you need one too" Iwaizumi nodded to him then, and was already about going out.
Although Oikawa clearly thought of escaping somehow, he didn't. It would have been stupid and maybe he would hurt Iwa-chan more.
So he stayed, following the forensic doctor silently to the vending machine, while people looked at him in disbelief, as he didn't look presentable at all.
Iwaizumi didn't care for the others and when they stood in front of the machines, he pulls out his staff discount card, putting it on the surface of the card reader field and then pushed the button for black coffee twice.
He glanced briefly to Oikawa, then looked back to the machine.
The machine started, taking out two plastic cups and placing them next to each other in the fixture.
“Sorry for my drunken state yesterday and the trouble I caused you" he began quietly, "I’ll make sure that you'll get a free ramen from Noya, that jerk...” he mumbled and still stared at the cups which were about being filled now.
“Please, don’t take anything of that too seriously. Whatever happened in detail...” Iwaizumi got even quieter, and with a beep the coffees were ready now too,
“I mean... I remember the most important fact but not every step I took or every word I said. You know...that sake”
Important fact? Gosh. You’re such a loser! Just say, you were overdramatic and emotional.
“But...also thanks for bearing me and...taking care of me.”
“You don’t have to be sorry” Oikawa shook his head lightly, but...
Not taking anything seriously, uh? So, hugging him back, squeezing his hand...he didn't remember anything of it, let alone meaning it.
"Don’t leave me...stay with me."
Even that...didn't mean anything to him? Yeah, Oikawa knew it, after all.
Who could have ever meant him, the arrogant detective?
He smiled with some expression of pain and sadness he couldn't hide, looking down at his feet, as Iwaizumi handed him his coffee. He took the cup, but didn't drink at all. Only holding it in his hand, staring at it.
“You would have done the same if I was like that, so...”
Iwaizumi scratched his head...so it was just that? Everyone would have done that?
Right. Of course.
Why the hell had he thought it could be something else? Whatever this something was...he should have known this. Damn it. Why was this hurting though? Clenching his heart in his chest together?
Iwaizumi pressed his lips together, exhaling.
Or was he mistaking things here!?
He looked back at Oikawa, seeing him staring into his coffee.
Fuck...I made things worse...
He took a large sip as if he needed it for courage - almost burning his tongue and hissing about it a second later.
But then Iwazumi took Oikawa's hand, dragging him around the corner, where the since-months-been-broken copy machine was, so they were a bit out of other's sight.
"Okay listen," Iwaizumi began, really tense, "Just in case, I’m not good with that thing. Explaining feelings and so. But I’ll try! I...I remember talking to you," he lowered his gaze, "Arguing. I remember saying some things I shouldn’t and...I know I had a break down. I know that..."
Iwaizumi was going to be more quiet now and he ran a hand nervously through his short spiky hair.
"And also...the embrace...and certainly, I asked you something which I also shouldn’t, or cling too much on you...that’s what I mean I can’t remember. I...I dunno...I’m a nuisance, being drunk, I mean"
Going red and feeling his heart pounding he went on, "I...I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable or so...I...I don’t know..."
Pausing, Iwaizumi finally looked up again, slowly. Realising that he was babbling like crazy, "I just don’t want you to take my emotional overdramatised outburst too personal...that’s something from my past."
God, he should shut his mouth.
Oikawa stared at him surprised and listened once more carefully to the shorter male. Iwaizumi felt guilty...but he should not. He didn't do anything wrong, after all.
“You’re not a nuisance" Oikawa began, "Actually, I’ve seen worse drunk men, you just...got too emotional, maybe?”
What else should he say...
“Let’s forget what happened. It’ll be the best for both of us. And, regarding your past...I won’t ask you anything. It clearly traumatised you, and I don’t want to bring those bad memories back to your mind” he tried to cover the uncomfortable topic, still gazing at his now cold coffee.
Iwaizumi looked at him, torn. On the one hand glad that the other didn't ask about what had happened to him in the past, but on the other side...maybe he had wanted to. Speak about it. Not staying silent again. Because having the feeling like yesterday, that there was finally someone who would understand...it was comforting. Sad, but comforting.
“And, about the case...just forget it, okay? I’ll finish this alone. You need some rest, after all that happened yesterday” Oikawa smiled as always, but he was serious. He meant those words.
He didn't want to have him with him. Too dangerous. Really.
The other's eyes widened a bit.
"W-what?! What’s that now?!" the doctor blurted, all puzzled, "You can’t drag me in and then just...le...t me standing here?!“
He almost had said it: leave.
"Don’t leave me..."
Oh shit...
But something else crossed his mind, connected with last night's pleading, but also focused on the very dangerous case.
"You’re a really talented detective and I acknowledge your skills, by all means. But I won’t let you do this alone! As you said: don’t tell me what to do. And as I said: I can be very stubborn. And stop that smiling, that's annoying!"
“No, you clearly need some rest, Iwa-chan! Look at those eye bags! No wonder you don’t attract any girl and Yui-chan dumped you!!” Oikawa turned the argument upside-down in his favor, joking.
"Look at your own eyeballs!" he talked back, as he usually would, "And stop putting the Yui-line up!!" he enraged a bit.
"It’s not that I was really into it, and I awfully hurt her, as she already called in sick for almost two weeks straight!" he whispered.
Shot.
Why did this guy get him to confess something new everytime?!
“She...what?! You really made it that bad uh...” Oikawa commented in surprise and somehow in shock, too, sighing quietly.
"Still...go back home and catch some sleep. By tomorrow you’ll hear from journals, that the great Oikawa Tooru has solved the case and arrested that damn Kim Seokjin!”
"You can have all the glory for yourself, I don't want it. But it’s a freaking dangerous case and why did you ask me in first place then? I may have an hangover, but I wasn’t up like someone else here, huh?! So let me freakin' help you!" Iwaizumi heard himself getting louder, although he didn't want to.
But Oikawa seemed not to be bothered. Instead, he closed his eyes, as if he was thinking about something.
“I don’t know why I asked you to follow me in this case...you just wanted to be occupied with something since that date didn’t go as expected, and so I did. But thinking of it, I shouldn’t have done this in the first place...” he said seriously, but his own voice blurted in the next second.
“Damn it! As you said, it’s dangerous!! You’re just a forensic doctor and have all your life to live! I don’t want to put someone in danger again! I...I just...don’t want...”
Slightly shocked seeing Oikawa so enraged, Iwaizumi still didn't want to back away.
"Yeah...and you have, too?“ they were clearly to be heard, "I get it! Oikawa, I get that you don’t want me to get hurt or...even die!"
He threw his half-emptied cup of coffee into the bin, "Do you think I didn’t notice how you looked at me, yesterday? When we were at your friend's place? Or...when you gave me that smile later? Stargazing?" he coded his breakdown with that paraphrase as he was so upset now, unable to calm down easily again.
"So do you get that I don’t wanna see you, and anyone else I care for, getting hurt or die?! Stop that fucking kamikaze shit!!“
And in Iwaizumi's eyes there was something to be found like it had been yesterday: the loss of a person he had cared for too much.
The detective stared at him, scruffed nose and blood boiling in his veins, but then...it would have been pointless arguing with him. Iwaizumi wouldn't listen to him anyways.
“I’m...sorry...” he just said, throwing his own full cup of coffee in the bin.
He turned his back to him, whispering.
“I don’t like coffee, you know?”
And with an inhale he proceeded, “If you wanna do this, fine. Not my business. We have to meet at Shibuya district, I have the invitations. You must have elegant clothing and...”
Hesitating he lowered his voice to an almost inaudible whisper, “We have to pretend to be...married. I know you may feel uncomfortable, you like women and you’re straight after all, in fact I won't ask you to do this. It’s just Kim Seokjin likes extravagant people...as if gay people are extravagant geez, I hate him” he then commented, always facing Iwaizumi with his back.
Listening carefully, the latter straightened his shoulders.
"Okay. Then...let me show him some hell of extravagance which in fact just shows his too often smashed brain" he answered with the same sincerity he had shown in front of Makki.
"I’ll do this. And in the end...it’s you, I'm there with, right? So...why should I feel uncomfortable? I won’t complain about any advice or hint you'll give me. Tell me all I should know until the party. Teach me. I’m not only an excellent forensic expert, but also a really fast learner"
That sounded almost like an application.
"I won’t be a burden to you. I told that Hanamaki guy before: it’s not that I haven’t dealt with problems before. But I won’t underestimate this case, Oikawa. Trust me.”
And then Iwaizumi said in an exhale: “Because I trust you.”
Oikawa peeked at him from over his shoulder with a surprised expression, then he turned back again, the crack of smile appearing on his lips.
He thought Iwaizumi would have been disgusted by that idea...it seemed he underestimated his professionalism.
“Alright, if you don’t have to do something here, we can go and prepare for tonight’s case party”
“Okay. I’ll be there in five minutes. Just wanna make sure Akaashi and Akane know about me leaving”
Iwaizumi was serious about this, so he just went right back to his own labratory: Akane had returned, whereas Akaashi was absent.
“I have to leave for today” he stated and received a surprised look in return by her, “Please work with Akaashi and help him. For Monday, I want you to submit your conclusions about today’s autopsy. You did a great job and I’d like to go on with you about the results and the on going laboratory analysis.”
Akane nodded in excitement, hearing that his evaluation of her work hadn't changed, she said with a wide grin: “I’d love to!”
Iwaizumi smiled, but then, of course, he was asked where he’s been going to.
“Special task,” he only replied and thought for a moment. Then he grabbed a memo from the desk and wrote a word and a name.
“Give Akaashi this! Don’t forget, he should make sure that his emergency hotline is active tonight.”
“W-what do you mean?” he patted her head and the young woman of course complained about it.
“I’ll explain later. Take care, okay?”
*
“So...What do you want to learn from me? What do you want to know?”
They walked down the way from the hospital and Iwaizumi had his hands put in the pockets of his jacket, looking up to the sky and giving the question a proper thought.
“Well...tell me what I should take care of. Conversations, topics I shouldn’t speak of. If there are people you think I should avoid. What I can expect from such parties...and of course how you want to proceed."
He glanced over to Oikawa.
"Maybe...also...how I should behave around you. Your own limits."
“You already know who's our target. And if we make ourselves noticeable, we’ll surely get to him personally. He’s one of those criminals who loves people’s attention, so he won’t have too much bodyguards around him tonight. He also loves gamble, poker...we’re lucky I know how to play that. If we get his attention during a game, then...” the detective explained, totally excited about finally arresting him.
“But we have to gather proofs. Especially those drugs he produces. He'll surely spread some of them during the party, so pay attention and don’t eat or drink anything that others give to you. Just me, okay?” he glanced at Iwaizumi, deadly serious about that last point.
“Don’t get along with these people. They are his spies, incredibly sly and will understand we’re just intruders” he showed him some pictures of those men.
Iwaizumi nodded from time to time, listened carefully and payed attention to the pictures Oikawa showed him. Remembering the faces of these men. He would recall their features subconsciously every now and again until the party. So he would not mistake them.
“And we’ll obviously have to act like a married couple...holding hands shouldn’t be a problem, we did that already. But I’m sure that bastard will ask for something else, and obviously we have to refuse. Find some excuses like 'oh, but we do this all the time at home' or 'he drank a lot of alcohol already, it will be disgusting kissing him', something like this. We don’t have to put a show if we don’t need it and I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable” he said while walking on.
“I’ll make up for this, dragging you in this case wasn’t a good idea, and this all must be a nuisance to you, I fully get it. I’ll be sure to pay you off once this case is closed.”
"Don’t worry about me. If it’s necessary, I’ll do this. I mean...more than holding hands and so...as long as it’s not bothering you"
Iwaizumi didn't like to do things half-heartily.
"I mean...it’s not an easy case, we have to be serious about it and I won’t let my own little flaws affect our actions."
Still...how Oikawa put it, holding hands already done, the forensic doctor had to hide his little smile.
Oikawa looked at him, a bit confused but determined.
“I know you wanna kiss me so bad, Iwa-chan, you don’t have to act along!” he winked at him.
Iwaizumi mumbled something into the beige scarf like 'I’d rather kiss your ass, idiot!' and rolled his eyes on the bad joke.
"Yeah, don’t attract too many people, I don’t wanna punch them one by one. Especially jealous women with long nails"
"Oh, Iwa-chan wants to play as my bodyguard, too? Amazing!"
Ah...Oikawa had a bad habit to joke when he was nervous. Acting as if it was nothing. Teasing the other person and therefore, distracting him/her from himself. But then, he got serious again.
“I don’t want you to do something more, just acting, pretending and holding hands will be fine. Or else, all the women there will be jealous! So, we have to get dressed, but before that...”
Looking at his wrist watch, checking the time he grinned suddenly: “Time for lunch!”
All about stopping at Osamu's, of course.
Entering the familiar shop after some minutes of walking, Iwaizumi got reminded of the bad scene with Yui the day before, remembering the Izakaya some meters ahead, but tried to shake it off. He preferred to focus on the present and the cosy atmosphere, greeting Osamu politely, who looked up in surprise.
"Rare time to see you here, Oikawa. Ah...Iwa-chan it was?"
"Iwaizumi, yeah" the asked one threw a narrowed look at the detective. How many people was he introduced as Iwa-chan?!
"Wanna eat here or take out?" the chef asked them and turned to the forensic doctor, "We have lunchtime specials now. Would you go for my recommendation?"
"Please, go ahead" Iwaizumi agreed.
“Thanks Samu, but we’ll take out, we have some stuff to work on” Oikawa interrupted.
Making their orders, Osamu got back to prepare the meals and so the two men waited for the dishes at the counter.
Oikawa glanced over to Iwaizumi, seeing him lost in his thoughts.
“Are you okay, Iwa-chan?”
“Y-yeah! Sure, sure!” the aforementioned gave a quick grin and looked around, “I just...really love the atmosphere here! It's as if you’re somehow...at home. Cosy, warm...well, yeah. Like that” he excused his mind trip.
Oikawa looked at him a few minutes more, then yelled in his usual manner: “Samu!”
The guy turned around, after flinching (as Iwaizumi did too) with a bothered and questioned look.
“You know what, we’re eating here. We’ll sit at that table!” Oikawa decided, pointing at the table in the corner they had been sitting once.
“Okay, but you don’t have to yell everytime, ya know?” Osamu replied with a sigh.
Oikawa shrugged and grinned at Iwaizumi, while going to take their seats.
"W-what?!“ it was Iwaizumi's favourite reaction when it came to the detective: just a surprised what or huh and widened eyes, blinking at him.
"I-is it okay? I mean...we’re really busy“
But there he was already shoved to the table. The same spot they had sat before. Noticing that grin...his heart started pounding and Iwaizumi couldn't do anything else than returning the grin with a soft smile. So he took his seat, sitting down.
“Who said we’re not gonna work here, too?” Oikawa asked back with a mischievous smile, now. Confidence suited him so well, and he didn't hestitate to play it out.
Osamu came over with some cups of green tea on a tray, putting them down.
“Shall we begin our training?” Oikawa suggested, after the chef left, as he was looking into Iwaizumi's olive green irises now, which showed confusion.
And to confuse the other male even more, the detective reached out and placed his hand gently on top of Iwaizumi's, rubbing it a bit. Multiple shivers ran through his body, as his fingertips touched that unknown skin, but he tried to ignore it. He was doing it just to be ready for that night at the party, right? They needed to get used to this to solve the case!
“I know it may be uncomfortable for you, and I’m sorry. Unfortunately, I’m not a woman, so tell me when I should stop. Even at the party” Oikawa commented seriously, continuing to stare in the shorter male's eyes.
Iwaizumi's pulse started racing when the detective stroked with his thumb over his hand so naturally.
Swallowing, the forensic doctor wasn't able to break the eye-contact. He didn't want to, but...there was also something else...why he couldn't withdraw at all.
His own eyes narrowed slightly.
What does he mean by that? When 'he should stop'?
Iwaizumi finally decided to give in, putting his question marks aside and using the chance of practice he had asked for. And as he had an excellent detective in front of him, from whom he could learn...it was time to trust him, right?
"Okay" he nodded slowly and then moved his hand under Oikawa's to trace down that warm palm with his own fingertips.
So soft...
Iwaizumi barely felt some cracked skin there.
“Still, I trust you in this” he added with a sincere expression and a faint, optimistic smile.
Oikawa closed his eyes for a moment, feeling Iwaizumi's touch on his own hand, slightly tingling.
“Good, then. You better should, as I’m the best detective of the world!”
“Yeah, I know you are” Iwaizumi simply returned with a smile, but it was really sincere this time.
Because he'd never met someone like Oikawa before: a detective who worked like him, was like him...he really was something.
“Now, now, I leave you two alone for a moment and this is what I find?!” Osamu interrupted them, referring to the two men who were holding hands on the table.
He then handed them their dishes.
“And you’re not the best detective of the world, geez, you sound just like my shitty brother!” the chef sighed.
“What?! Your brother is clearly the worst detective existing, you know?" Oikawa snapped, "And I’m sorry to say that, but I can’t stand him! You know that!”
Breaking his grip of Iwaizumi's hand he took the plate.
And as the latter felt the emptiness around his hand, he pulled back too, of course. But letting go was more uncomfortable than holding hands, actually.
“Yeah, yeah, I know. I can’t stand his annoying ass too, and he hates you too!” Osamu repeated as if it was an old tale, while shrugging and rolling his eyes, "Dig in as long as it's hot!"
“So...Osamu’s brother is also a detective? Or was it just some bad joking?!” the forensic doctor asked when they were alone again, taking the chopsticks, “Have you two worked together?”
“Unfortunately yes, he’s a detective, if I should call him so...anyways, he can’t do his work. I hate his methods, and he’s just so annoying!” Oikawa vented immediately, scruffing his nose as if he was irritated to talk about him.
“Tell me about it," Iwaizumi looked up, while shoving some of the rice into his mouth and chewing on it. He was curious now.
“Tell me what you dislike...doesn’t matter if it’s about work or life in general. Tell me something...you know...to get to know you a bit more, as...my husband?”
So it was not about Osamu's brother, but about Oikawa himself. And Iwaizumi didn't lose his smile, but looked at the other with real interest, “Or if you don’t want to...let me support you in ranting about that little motherfucker, you clearly can’t stand and who can’t stand you too?” he grinned with a little bit of provocation in it.
It wasn't that Oikawa didn't want to answer. He only...had his difficulties in doing so.
As...my husband...
Oh my...Oikawa’s head was spinning now. Hearing Iwaizumi saying those words...to him...no, it wouldn’t end up well.
“Okay then” he inhaled, trying to calm down a bit and control his heartbeat again, “He’s really annoying, more than me, actually” Oikawa started with a sigh, but Osamu’s voice said “it’s not true!” from somewhere behind them.
Glaring into the direction his voice came from, he continued his rant.
“He actually follows the rules, because he works in the police, after all. His methods are all technological and stuff, and I hate them. I mean, can’t he just do his work traditionally?! It’s more fun! And when Daichi-kun calls me for a case, he would always be there because ‘I’m the real detective here, not you’ Ughhh!” He blurted out, imitating Osamu's brother voice.
“He just likes to interfere with my work, as I don’t work for the police... Actually, Daichi-kun calls me when they are in trouble or when a case is too difficult...and Atsumu hates it, as much as I hate him.”
Iwaizumi just kept listening with his smile on his lips, and had to suppress a little chuckle as Osamu broke in for a moment, apologising to Oikawa immediately because he frowned at the forensic doctor for a second. Making a gesture that he should go on, he watched the detective with the perception of his professionalism, all focused on the details: how the brunette clicked his tongue, how his eyebrows whipped up and down, how his lips shaped a pout...his long lashes lowered as he was imitating that Atsumu man.
“So to sum up...he’s a jerk who relies on technique and clean working, but doesn’t like others to interfere with his crime scenes, especially not a detective who turns his whole world upside down. Because if that one is called, it means he’s not good enough for the case alone and that is something he can’t stand. As a detective here can’t stand that someone is working on his case as long as he hasn't proved his ability to do so?” Iwaizumi packed his amused teasing in a roundabout way.
“Yeah, exactly!” Oikawa exclaimed in an instant, crossing his arms. But...when he thinks about it...
“Wait...I’m not like that!” he corrected himself, pouting now for real.
“I didn’t say it was you” Iwaizumi was grinning even more, when he saw Oikawa's pout, “But now that you say that...”
His mood had clearly lightened up and he was able to joke around again.
One could mistake this as flirting, when he continued with his provocative grin and half-closed eyes, “Well, good for me, that I passed your test. Or...am I still tested?”
“Yeah, you’re still under exam, you incompetent forensic doctor and crime scene destroyer!” Oikawa returned that mean comment, sticking his tongue out at him.
“As sassy as ever” the forensic doctor murmured, then just put something onto his chopsticks and pushed it directly into Oikawa’s mouth.
“Be quiet before Osamu scolds you again!” he said, chuckling with a cute smile, as he saw the perplexed face of his opposite.
“Are you doing this to train your skills for tonight, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa asked, mouth full.
"You’re the one to tell me, Tooru-chan?" Iwaizumi could not stop himself to give him some nickname in return, continuing to eat too.
And that was, when Oikawa nearly choked on his own food. Coughing and being a blushing mess now, he turned his head abruptly away from Iwaizumi, still not able to catch his breath.
What the hell was that just now...?!
He thought about that so damn cute nickname and tried to inhale without feeling the pain in his lungs, caused by the wrongly directed bite in his trachea.
Putting down his own food immediately, Iwaizumi got up shocked about that reaction and walked over to Oikawa, slapping him on the right spot of his back.
"God, I’m sorry, did I shove it in too deep?!"
He wasn't even aware of how wrong that sounded, making it even harder for Oikawa to regain his composure.
"Oi, Osamu! Choking emergency! Can I get a glass of water?!“
While he was shouting over, he rubbed the detective's back in calming circles. Osamu sighed, moving fast and handing over the glass.
"Thanks" Iwaizumi said, bending down and handing the brunette the water to clear his throat. Swallowing quick, the effect set in and Oikawa was able to breathe. But the blush was still visible on his cheeks.
“It’s alright...it’s not your fault, I just chocked on my own...” he said with a hoarse voice and drank another sip. Trying to hide his face, not looking the other in the eyes.
God, what was he doing to him?!
Iwaizumi stayed in a squatted pose next to him, still worried.
"Don’t give me such an heart attack. God...that was tough...you’re still red all over your face"
He didn't think that it was because of him. And so he went back to his own seat.
"So...I hope I have qualified as your first aid too?" he said with a soft compassionate smile.
Choking wasn't fun at all.
“You’re really good at it...guess you didn't become a doctor for nothing, uh?”
"Yeah, whereas first aid is not the thing I can use so often, don’t you think?" the shorter male laughed.
Oikawa was simply relieved that he hadn't found out the truth about his red cheeks... Sometimes, Iwaizumi’s density was such a good thing.
And yes, if Iwaizumi would have been ever considering that Oikawa fell a bit for his words or actions, he might have found out, but...he only kept in mind that the first shocked look was so adorable and cute, combined with the blush... No, stop that!
And as they finished their meals then, Oikawa seemed to be thinking of something, staring at his companion.
“Do you have some elegant clothes?”
Finishing as well, Iwaizumi put the chopsticks aside and used a tissue to clean his lips.
“Of course I have?” his eyebrows lifted, “I have quite some collar shirts, jackets or suits.”
It was just that there weren't so many chances to wear them. Mostly for official clinic events.
“Guess, I don’t have to ask you the same question?”
“Mhm~ I don’t think Iwa-chan could have good taste in those though!” Oikawa exclaimed with a shrug.
A sudden upcoming feeling from deep down his heart wanted him to invite Iwa-chan to his apartment, to get prepared together for the party, but...that would have been a bad idea. As it was better, that Iwaizumi didn't know about where and how he was living...
"I have more style than you think" Iwaizumi stated and for a moment he wanted to say 'Show me better then!' but he ended up with a: "You can show me your taste in fashion later!"
And after paying, getting ready, they stood outside again.
“Well, we should leave now, preparing and stuff. So, I’ll see you tonight!”
For a moment Iwaizumi hesitated, but took up his courage and said, "Shall I pick you up or something!? Going by cab wouldn't be such a good first impression?" And he had a driver's license and a car, too.
“I’ll pick you up, since I know where you live” Oikawa refused and looked at his wrist watch, checking the time.
“We should hurry. Here, the invitation and...” pulling out the invitation paper from the inside of his coat's pocket he went for something else. With hesitance.
“...the ring.”
“O-Oh...yeah...of course” Iwaizumi blinked with a little pinkish tint on his cheeks.
It really looked like it would fit on his finger. Of course. No time for coincidences. Maybe Oikawa had just looked at his fingers and knew his size already. It wouldn't be a surprise. So the forensic doctor gave him a wry smile.
"Don’t tell me, I should put it on myself?”
It was only a joke, but indeed he was a bit nervous and somehow embarrassed too. And impressed that Oikawa really was prepared for everything.
“You’re such an idiot, Iwa-chan” Oikawa replied a bit too cheerfully, taking his hand gently and putting the ring on his finger in a slow and smooth move with his slim fingers.
It fit perfectly.
The detective looked up to the man in front of him and all he could feel was comfort...warmth...home.
Iwaizumi was a loss of words and he only stared at his hand...with the wedding band on his ring finger.
His heart started playing in an upbeat again, and after his teasing face expression vanished, only one of amazement and some overwhelming feelings remained. Iwaizumi sensed that the detective was watching him carefully, and he never seemed to feel so nervous in front of someone, but on the other side...
His head lifted gradually, meeting Oikawa’s beautiful brown eyes who vented...secureness.
Caring. A quick spark of...love?
Not saying anything, as he couldn't, his voice was hoarse as he spoke some seconds afer.
“Do you...have yours with you?”
Because he didn't wear it, obviously.
“Yes” Oikawa replied, as he pulled out his own ring from his pocket, “But I can put it on myself” he added with a grin, and released Iwaizumi's hand to put the ring on.
So, the shorter male didn't hesitate too long and took it off Oikawa's fingers, looking at him with a serious expression on his face.
“Yeah, you can...but I won’t let you” he muttered and although his voice wasn't shaky, his fingers were.
Holding Oikawa’s hand with his own now, in a safe and secure grip, as he put on the ring...and then looked up slowly.
Seriously...Iwaizumi Hajime?!
What was this? Oikawa had never felt like this before. He looked into Iwaizumi’s eyes, and could see some sparkling in them...was it just his imagination? Sure it was.
He then lowered his own gaze and stared at his hand, the ring...Iwaizumi just put on.
It was a strange feeling. Like he was trapped forever.
He never thought about getting married, but this was for a case, right? All for a case and it was just a professional thing. Nothing more.
And when they were done...noticing Oikawa lowering his eyes, the long lashes framing his eyelids perfectly, Iwaizumi felt the urge to come closer. He leant in, not sure about what he was going to do, but...he could sense his scent...and his hand closed just for a moment around the detective's one.
A strange feeling which built up in his heart. Faking a marriage...seemed not so bad at all. Not with this man.
“Well...that’s much better” he mumbled, his thumb rubbing softly over the finger with the ring on it.
But as Oikawa finally realised that Iwaizumi was simply too close, he straightend up and therefore, backed away.
“So...let’s get prepared, right! Guess...you need more time than I will.”
W-What was Iwaizumi just thinking, coming so close like that? It was dangerous! Freaking dangerous!
Oikawa stiffened, then reminded himself to get his composure back.
However, he wasn't the only one who had problems with going back to normal. Although Iwaizumi had been the one initiating to put on the ring on Oikawa’s finger or approaching him just like that.
What the hell...was I thinking?
“Y-yeah...I’ll see you later” he replied quietly, hiding his mouth and nose under his scarf.
That detective wasn't only handsome, clever, really fast with his conclusions and always up for a surprise...but being with him seemed to be not so bad, either... Iwaizumi enjoyed his company.
He had the feeling that the fake-marriage was about becoming something more than whate they had planned...
He inhaled deeply and then tried to focus on his own preparation, getting back to his apartment. Going for his best suit.
Notes:
Yoo, getting interesting? We hope so.
Thank you so much for all the support you show to this fic.
Does Iwachan have more taste in suits than Tooru-chan? How will this case develop? Will they just hold hands...?
Find out in the next chapter (that will be a BOOM BIG WOAH INTERESTING CHAPTER) ;P
Chapter 7: Fake husbands
Notes:
No chapter summary, just enjoy this chapter. It has a lot.
Chapter Text
Coming home, Iwaizumi jumped into shower, dried himself with a large towel and started to shave the beard stubbles that made his face edgier and himself a little bit older. He rubbed with his hand over the jawline while looking into the mirror, just concentrating on his recent doing. It had been a long time he got himself prepared for some special event.
Iwaizumi wasn't bothered by wearing suits. He wasn't bothered wearing a tie or so, as he actually liked what this formal clohing made out of him. And he wasn't someone who cared too much about looks: he was well aware that he had his charm.
Maybe...he could even make Oikawa fall for him a bit? Teasing out some embarrassed reaction? Causing him to blush?
The forensic doctor smirked to himself, just by the thought of seeing the paler cheeks of the brunette going all red, right to his ears.
With a quiet chuckle, he went to his bedroom, choosing the best collar shirt he owned and taking out the suit too. Once his hair was dried by air as well, he combed it neatly and put some wax on, so it was fixed. Going for a simple but charmingly smelling cologne, his neck got some sprinkles of it.
He looked into the mirror on the corridor, hung up on the wall, and checked his collar. His eyes focused on his figure, on the ring he was wearing..and a little smirk appeared on his face, turning then into a softer smile.
“Iwaizumi Hajime...compliment yourself. Your fake-husband will instantly fall for you.”
At this phrase he stiffened.
A thought crossed his mind...a thought he'd never given a chance before...
Thinking of it was one thing. Speaking it out loud...was another.
*
Oikawa entered his house, or better to say: the little apartment of his. Closing the door, he inhaled deeply. He looked around, but of course there was no one to be seen.
It was always like this, when he came back home: finding it empty and feeling lonely. After all, Oikawa was just like that: lonely.
His apartment was a disaster, comparing to Iwachan’s one. Books, scientific things, microscopes, magazine cut-outs and other tools were spread everywhere. However, there was nothing in the fridge, because he didn't know how to cook after all. That was also the reason why he always ate outside.
The detective bursted out in laughter, not even knowing why.
Was it the still lingering happiness he had felt with Iwaizumi before?
No...it was something else.
Geez...I should take my shit back right.
As he thought so, he went to his bedroom, getting ready for the party. Of course he would wear his best suit and put on his favorite cologne.
The one Iwaizumi seemed to like so much...what the hell?
Why was he thinking about him now?!
He stared at himself and was just sure that he looked as handsome as always:
the collar of his shirt pressed softly against his neckline; the elegant black suit, bringing his delicate body structure in shape; his hair goddamn good styled.
But...
Oikawa reached for a cosmetic product, putting under his eyes some foundation, covering up his dark eyebags. Better.
Breathing in and out for once, Oikawa left his apartment, got to his car in the garage and drove right away the route to his poor fake husband, who had to put up with him for that night.
He didn't even let some music play, going all the way through the city centre. Usually he would, but tonight, although he wasn't scared, he just felt tension rising up from his bones. Probably, because he rarely got the chance to arrest some high-society drug dealer and murderer, but also because he wasn't sure what to expect from the evening with Iwaizumi.
So, it was just more than about the right time when he arrived in front of the apartment complex and stopped the engine of his car.
Well...let the fun begin.
And Iwaizumi hoped, that it wouldn't be the last time he thought that.
Of course, he had trust in Oikawa, but nobody could forsee such events, so he just kept his fingers crossed that things would go smoothly for them. He went out the small entrance hall of the building, and got to the detective, who was waiting for him.
“Nice car, Mr detective" he tried to play off a compliment for the simple looking but super clean vehicle, which just fit Oikawa right: dark blue as the night, slim features, a little bit edgy.
He couldn't go on further, trying to joke about these similarities he had just found, as his ability to speak seemed totally lost, looking at his fake-spouse, who sat behind the steering wheel and looked up to him.
And there his heart went boom.
Iwaizumi took notice of his perfectly styled hair, surrounded by the chill scent of that one cologne he actually liked and Oikawa’s own scent... Going on to the...oh God...he shouldn't stare. He so shouldn't stare!
But it was hard not to do so, finding him distracted so much, while everything shouted at He's hot!
Iwaizumi sat down next to him, pounding heart, and buckled the safety belt, trying to focus on other things than Oikawa’s more than handsome body, being wrapped in that more than perfect suit which emphasised his chest and broad shoulders (broader than he had imagined), as Iwaizumi had never seen them despite wrapped with a coat or thick pullover.
“Nice suit too, Iwa-chan” Oikawa chuckled as the other stammered that much but couldn't avoid staring as well.
But actually, another thought had crossed his mind, because he noticed how the forensic doctor had blinked at him in astonishment.
No...don’t look at me like that, please!
So Oikawa did the same for a brief moment, staring, just to find out that Iwaizumi Hajime was even hotter than he was before.
His spiky hair styled with some wax, shimmering in the light of the street lamps, his edgy jaw line, how his adam's apple bobbed slightly, because of...irritation? His clear olive green eyes looking through the windscreen. That suit that seemed to fit him so well, how it stretched with slight folds around his chest, showing off those damn strong pectorals he had never given a thought about. And...that damn infatuating cologne! God, that was perfect, he was perfect.
Iwaizumi actually wasn't that aware of his looks anymore. Of course, he had hoped not to underdress or overdress. He had even felt confident at home in that suit.
Good. Almost...sexy.
But as soon as he was with Oikawa, even if the detective just glanced over to him for a few seconds, all his confidence vanished in an instant, and he felt like a teenager girl: being insecure about her appearance in front of her crush.
Could his damn heart stop beating so loud? Thank you!
“Same goes for you” he replied with a hoarse voice which he excused with the cold air, if ever being asked. Clearing his throat slightly, he gave a short look with redded cheeks, trying to obviously giving Oikawa a visual check up from head to hip and was immediately hit with another sassy comment.
“So, do you like what you see, my dear husband?~” he chirped, looking at him confidently, while starting the engine again.
Much better.
Like what I see? Damn, it’s like wanting to stop here and have a kissing session right now! - he thought to himself.
“I remember someone saying, that he doesn't want me to make the women jealous. I throw that back.”
Oikawa bursted out in laughter, he did not even know why. It was just like that: Being with Iwaizumi let him feel light-hearted, carefree, just...good.
Iwaizumi only smirked to himself. He liked it. That pure sound of Oikawa's voice. Not the fake one, but his real laughter now.
They went back to the road and after having a pretty calm drive without speaking too much as they both feel the tension rising with every kilometre passing by, they finally arrived in at their destination. More the suburban rich area. Villas next to each other. Wide open spaces to the next neighbour. The roadside was filled with expensive cars, standing in row, some people getting out of them, others standing in small groups at the tail, talking.
Iwaizumi scanned them carefully. Most of them didn't make the impression that they were actually dangerous, and that meant to be even more aware of them. It was a party for society. What kind of society was to be defined by the host, and he was pretty sure that their culprit had given it a lot of thought who to invite and who not. They weren't at a gangster party, but that didn't mean a safe one too.
Getting out of their car, while Iwaizumi looked around with narrowed eyes, Oikawa came around the bonnet and stopped in front of his spouse for tonight. Finding the forensic doctor giving him a questioning look, he reached with his hand for the other's cheek, making it look like he was caressing it.
The shorter male held his breath for a second, as he had been caught off-guard, but he quickly relaxed when he felt what the detective was actually doing: putting on an earphone, hiding it in Iwaizumi's ear. He got closer then, embracing him softly, so he could whispers into the other's ear - goddamn that scent!!
“This is for emergency. If something happens, talk to me through this. We’ll need this to hear Kim Seokjin too, when I’ll put this on one of his buddies’ coat” Oikawa explained quietly, then pulling out of his pocket a little, alsmost invisible microphone.
Iwaizumi got the clue, and responded with a soft embrace too. He leaned in, as if he acknowledged his husband's small gesture. That warm breath of his made the forensic doctor's skin tickle a bit though.
“Okay...got it” Iwaizumi muttered, as Oikawa put the mic back in his pocket and, while they were standing so close, he pulled out his phone, keeping his other arm wrapped around Oikawa's waist so that he was still close to him as if he wanted to tell him something. Indeed, he was sending a number with some ''' in it to a contact.
“I didn’t tell Akaashi about it, but he’s on hotline. If the emergency is too hot to deal with, I'll give him the code and special squad will be sent.”
That was just for the absolute worst case scenario he could imagine, because it would lead to chaos and maybe to more unwanted victims...but Iwaizumi knew the special unit well enough, as they had never failed getting someone out.
Moreover...he said it. He would not let Oikawa go on alone.
Iwaizumi switched off the phone and threw it in the car, closing the door then. He chose his smart watch, it was easier to work with.
He cupped Oikawa’s cheeks, looking him sincere into his eyes.
“I trust you. Whatever it is, I trust you. I won’t object in anything you need me to do, okay?”
He wanted him to know, that he shouldn't worry about it at all. That Iwaizumi knew exactly that he'd have to play his role as his husband. That he knew exactly where he had himself thrown into.
Oikawa, half surprised by his gesture, smiled back sincerely.
“You’ll regret it one day, trusting me, I mean. And you’re taking this roleplay too seriously. Kim Seokjin will have no doubt about us!” he made Iwaizumi blush, mumbling something inaudible about better taking things too serious than to reckless. But Oikawa's laughter didn't make him notice that, and so he took the shorter male's hand and started to walk inside, handing the bodyguard the invitations as they got to the door.
“Sir, I'm sorry, but no smartwatches or mobiles at the party” the bodyguard called Iwaizumi back, "We'll take care of it and hand it to you when you're leaving."
Fuck it.
Iwaizumi stared at him, then to Oikawa. The detective nodded, he should obey or they’d doubt about them right from the start. So the forensic doctor apologised for the inconvenience that he simply forgot to take it off and handed the gorilla of a doorman the smartwatch with a put-on smile.
Being allowed to enter the party now, it was already pretty crowded and noisy. People talking, chit-chatting, the touching of glasses somewhere and background music, jazz tunes, playing in the surrounding.
“Don’t leave my side” Oikawa muttered to his fake-husband, as they made their way through the assembled group there.
In the back corner of the community room, they found some people playing poker on a huge table, and so Oikawa led his companion there, because that was his plan: being noticed by Kim Seokjin while gambling and winning. They had to get closer to that criminal, so they could gather enough proofs to throw him in prison. Oikawa sat down on the free barstool at the table, while Iwaizumi stayed right by his side.
“Oho, what do we have here? A gay couple?!” a man with back-styled silvery hair, thick grey eyebrows and amber coloured eyes exclaimed, looking at them with a wide smirk, and also staring at their matching rings. Some others laughed at them. Of course.
Oikawa clenched his fists, unseen, but he felt offended. However, he wasn't left alone there. He could feel soft fingertips touching his hand in reassurance. Looking up, he saw Iwaizumi putting a smile on too, and it made him somehow calm down and smile.
“Gentlemen, how about judging our worth in the game by playing? I’m sure I can beat everyone of you here” he confidently proposed, catching everyone’s attention now.
Oikawa Tooru was the best at drawing all eyes on him.
This was something Iwaizumi could watch now with his own two eyes. The game started and one of the guys around the age 40, proper stature, full of himself, glanced at Oikawa who claimed his challenge, and grinned back.
"Very confident, so you wanna beat my 20 years experience in gambling? How about some good stake?" he turned around to the others, some of them seemed to be his acquaintances, spreading his arms, "This cute little pickle smoker challenges me.“
Well, he was an asshole, but the attention really focused on them.
Nice, thanks buddie.
“Let’s see...make your bets, but don’t lay your expectations too high on him!” and the enemy's eyes narrowed.
“Do it, arrogant baby face. Show your daddy boy here, how much you want to win. Maybe he'll spank you right, afterwards!”
Oikawa simply grinned at all those provocations, still feeling okay with Iwaizumi's hand on his, holding his blood pressure in control.
“Don’t talk too much, you’re wasting oxygen” the detective winked at his opponent with his own asshole tone.
“You little...!” the man swore under gritted teeth, if it was for the wink or the comment, it didn't matter.
The game began. Oikawa wasn't going good, nor bad, he was...normal. As if he'd played some times but not enough to kick the other's ass. And that amused the men around them even more.
“Oh, pur little baby boy isn’t so good at this after all, uh?” someone laughed.
Iwaizumi himself had a good look in his fake-husband's cards, but he had never shown interest in poker, so he was surprised too when the brunette turned everything around.
“Not so fast” Oikawa commented in a calm tone, and suddenly everyone kept their mouths shut, as the undercover detective showed his last cards, called for laying his cards literally on the table.
“Royal flush” he grinned.
The unbeatable move in poker.
Oikawa won.
With widened eyes, Hajime’s lips curled up to a smirk. The beaten, instead, only hissed. How he hated it, if brats like him won!
“That was a quick loss, Jo-Jo!” someone called over to the loser, “Jo-Jo has got his ass fucked up!”
“Shut up!” the loser frowned and ran a hand through his hair. A significant flower shaped tattoo was clearly to be seen on his wrist. One proof that he was one of Kim Seokjin’s buddies they had to be cautious of. Iwaizumi had his hand on Oikawa’s shoulder, pressing it gently.
“Tsk...fucking tonk!” Jo-Jo gnarled and got up from his seat.
That little brat must have cheated! There was no way that he would lose to someone like him. Pretty baby face with cocky attitude!
For one moment Iwaizumi thought that he'd start a fight or something like that, but he only made his way out of there. The other guests knew too well that the Jo-Jo guy was an homophobic arsehole and seeing his ass kicked like that had been just precious. No surprise that someone tried to make things worse for him, encouraging the fake couple to get in touch with each other: “Come on, start your gay smooching already!”
“We’re sorry, gentlemen! We already had a long make up session at home~” Oikawa said nonchalantly and winked. Caressing Iwaizumi’s hand, he got up from his stool.
“Man, you’re so boring!” someone replied, but Oikawa ignored him totally, dragging Iwaizumi with him and passing by those annoying people.
“I’m sorry, I’ll handle this. You don’t have to worry about anything, I won’t touch you in any way other than holding hands!” he confirmed to his fake husband in a reassuring way.
Still he clenched his fists, blood boiling in his veins he tried to suppress. Iwaizumi followed Oikawa and felt how tight his grip was. They walked over to the sidelines, near the balcony. Some fresh air was exactly what could cool them down a bit at that moment.
Right after they stopped, Oikawa spilled his anger out.
“If it were for me, I would have arrested all those idiots! What is it with their homophobic shit? I mean, why do gay people have to exhibit in front of those fucking assholes like they are some circus animals or freaks?!”
Iwaizumi's eyebrows knitted. He understood that it was upsetting, but he clearly saw that it was more than that for Oikawa.
“Hey...” he tried, but the other just went on, completely enraged.
“Hey!” Iwaizumi said again, a bit louder, closing his hand around one of Oikawa’s fists and cupped his cheek with his right hand.
“Breathe” he said in a calming voice, looking the other in eye with concern, “I absolutely agree with you. They are assholes and I’d like to see their mouth shut too. But...breathe...”
Oikawa stared at him, as if he didn't understand. As if Iwaizumi had spoken in another language. Opening his mouth, but not knowing what to say, he closed it again. Right...breathing...
Since they had entered the party, he'd been tensed and he felt the muscle soreness because of that. Slowly, his chest began to rise and fall again. He then inhaled deeply, lowering his gaze to his feet. Those damn assholes...he should focus on the case. Iwaizumi was right. Totally right.
Feeling his fingertips on his cheek, the detective closed his eyes for a little moment. Strange...why was Iwaizumi able to make him feel so calm again? How? Just with a touch? Just by his smoothing voice?
But as they stayed like that in silence, someone suddenly bumped against the forensic doctor's back. And the latter had just relaxed a bit himself, when he saw Oikawa finally breathing calmly again, as it happened.
“Oh, watch out!” the man said with a chuckle, as he continued with his dancing, humming and stumbling. He was clearly drunk and on drugs.
“Perfect...” Oikawa whispered, his eyes finally enlightened and it seemed he totally forgot about the humiliating moment before.
Leaving Iwaizumi just behind, Oikawa followed the man and tapped him on the shoulder.
“Excuse me?”
The short man turned towards him and had a confused look written all over his face.
“I want to have some...you know, something good” Oikawa referred to the drugs, “Do you know where I could find some?”
The man's eyebrows knitted, then he grinned at him.
“Yah, friend! I have some here!”
As he told him so, he quickly glanced around, then reached for his suits pocket. Handing Oikawa a little plastic package with some drugs in it. Clearly Kim Seokjin’s drugs, the imprint was there.
“Thank you, man! I owe you one!” Oikawa replied, handing him some rolled money in return.
“Anytime!”
Putting the plastic bag with drugs inside his pocket, Oikawa smirked and saw the guy off.
Then turning around to Iwaizumi, he lifted his chin.
“One proof gained. Now we need to find...” but he was interrupted by someone who approached them from behind.
“Excuse me.”
Both Oikawa and Iwaizumi turned to him, eyes widening. Kim Seokjin himself made his entrance and was about greeting his new guests in person. While the forensic doctor tried not to show any unreasonable emotion at all, Oikawa needed to swallow a bit, so he could put on his usual pokerface. And he would need it.
“You’re clearly a great poker player, compliments on your last game!” the boss said with a polite smile on his lips, looking at Oikawa directly. Putting the cigarette he had just lit before between his lips, he inhaled deeply.
“Thank you, I know I am” Oikawa replied with all of his confidence.
“And you must be his husband, uh?" the Korean drug dealer and boss of this bandit family glanced over to the shorter male, lifting his eyebrows in expectations, "I love freaks like you, really! Why don’t we talk at the bar counter? I’ll offer the drinks of course” Seokjin suggested, as he led them the way.
“Well, that’s an excellent idea, right Kazuki?” Oikawa smiled at his fake-husband, calling him with that name which stood officially on the fake IC, Makki had given him. So they changed a quick look, then followed the boss in silence.
I’ll show you who the real freak is, you bastard.
Walking over to the bar, Seokjin didn't hesitate long, and ordered the same kind of scotch for all three of them. The best one could afford, obviously.
“You really played Jo-Jo off," he then began, as they waited for the drinks and focused on the tall brunette in front of him, "He's one of the best players I've ever met in my entire life, so that was a really impressive game and...also very amusing for the other guests.”
His hand slid to the inside of his jacket and took out a package of cigarettes, but Iwaizumi refused politely.
“I quitted three years ago” he said as an explanation, and the business man just made a “Is it so”, looking at Oikawa now.
“Yeah, my husband is just a bit boring when it comes to parties!”
Oikawa took the lead and also one of the nicotine samples from Seokjin, while the forensic doctor gave him a confused look. What had he said before? Not taking anything from that man or his buddies. So why was he taking it?
“I actually love parties like this” the detective continued, as he let the boss lighting his cigarette. Yeah...of course, he knew he had warned Iwaizumi before, but not accepting an offer from that man himself, even if it was just a stupid cigarette, could introduce them to death. Iwaizumi understood too late and swallowed, giving Oikawa a wry smile.
Seokjin looked at the shorter male, amused about the little put on fight.
As the smoke enveloped them, the forensic doctor could clearly detect by smelling, that it wasn't only nicotine inside. So...drugs, too?
"Well...at least you have a reliable chauffeur, right?"
"That’s what husbands are for" Iwaizumi replied with his fake smile and fortunately the drinks arrived just in time. He just thanked himself for thinking of having the quick lunch before leaving for the party, which would save his stomach now too.
“So...I guess, you're also not going for a good scotch?”
He challenged him. That goddamn bastard!
Iwaizumi shook his head, taking one of the glasses in his hand and smelled the liquid. Yes...it was really intense, but it was scotch, nothing else. And when he was about to taste...
Damn it, Iwa-chan! Don’t drink!
Oikawa was clearly terrified by what could happen to Iwazumi, as he couldn't have checked the drink before by himself, but of course he wasn't allowed to show his worry openly.
“A 20 year old glengoyne. Dark chocolate and cocoa but also pretty dry and intense.”
The forensic doctor was really amazed by that wonderful choice of alcohol here and lifted an eyebrow.
He hadn't gulped it down though. It had been merely a sip, but thanks to the intense smell the brand was easy to identify. And Iwaizumi was indeed good with alcohol, at least the Whiskey part.
“Not bad. You have some taste" Seokijn nodded with a smirk to Oikawa, “Your husband is surely a great connoisseur of alcholic drinks, uh?”
“He is, I married him for a reason after all!” Oikawa joked, making the boss laugh out loud.
“You’re surely so fun! I’d like to have you around more than tonight!”
Seokijn drank from his own glass. This didn't have to be a proof or anything, but it gave him a good alibi. Who would poison his own guests and therefore himself? Yeah, clearly a bastard like him with a backplan in mind.
And still Iwaizumi was impressed, how Oikawa made his way clearly to the boss' liking.
"I’m sure we can make space for it in our schedule."
The boss smirked at Hajime.
"What an honour!“
At least I’m not ruining it totally...
Of course, he wasn't used to infiltrate in someone’s party or speaking with businessmen and drug bosses like him, but fortunately he had his own experiences with some politicians on the other side. The legal side. It was important not to cross a line.
“Actually, I have a collection of good whiskey, I’d love to show it to you” Seokjin then suddenly spoke to Iwaizumi, calling one of his best men with a finger snap from behind.
Of course, he would have never been around alone. He was well aware of his status, well aware that a lot of people wanted to see his head rolling. And even if it was his own party, he would never risk it. Oikawa tried to stay calm and smiled at that suggestion.
“That’s really generous. I hope you'll soon tell me some stories about them?” Iwaizumi answered with a polite smile, “As every drink has its own good episode to tell.”
He glanced over to Oikawa, then still adressing the boss, “But don’t enjoy my absence too much. I still need him” and he meant it.
“Woojin will show you, while I’ll entertain myself with your interesting husband!” Seokjin added and his best man approached them, looking down with a stern expression at Iwaizumi who therefore glanced over to Oikawa.
The detective gestured something with a smooth movement, as if he wanted to stroke back his short hair, making the impression that he wasn't so fond of leaving his husband on his own like this.
"Well then...have fun, Kazuki. But don't look for other handsome men!" he joked and got only a wry smile back.
"I won't."
Actually, they had spoken nonverbally about the secret earphone for communication, if he was in danger...Oikawa hoped that it wouldn't be necessary to use it at all.
Iwaizumi followed the big guy, getting out of the detective's sight and soon disappeared between the other guests, who were constantly shifting and moving. A second, when the brunette's heart skipped a beat.
He will be fine.
“My husband will surely love and appreciate you luxurious collection” Oikawa lengthened his words, as he was left with his enemy. Straightening his shoulders, he took the glass of scotch but didn't touch it with his lips.
Although it seemed alright, he didn't want to have that expensive liquid of a killer and drug dealer getting down his throat. Maybe it wasn't poisoned, but Oikawa would still feel like it, as he already felt nauseous anyway...the meeting with Seokjin brought back memories.
“He will” Seokjin smirked, playing with his own glass in his hand for now and swirled it in clockwise slow movements.
“Now, how should I call you, Oikawa Tooru?”
Oikawa went pale. His eyes widened in shock for a moment.
“How long did you know?” he asked, putting down his cigarette on the ashtray. The show was over.
“You know, I may be friendly, but I’m not stupid” the boss commented, “And my dear men aren’t too” he added, looking in the direction of that one drunk man who Oikawa received the drugs from before, and put the almost invisible microphone on his jacket when he didn't seem to notice.
The detective laughed a bit, nervously, then looked the criminal in the eyes.
“Guess I underestimated you.”
“You really did. Unfortunately, I had to send your husband somewhere else. I would have had fun with him too” the boss replied as if they were in a normal conversation and took a sip of the alcohol.
“Don’t you fucking dare to touch him!” Oikawa swore under his breath, the worries rising in his throat and bringing his heart to beat much faster.
“Oh, I won’t, I promise. My best man will” Seokjin simply laughed, as if he would ever lay a hand on someone.
Oikawa clenched his fists, losing all his cool in an instant.
Iwa-chan...Iwa-chan please...
*
That Seokijn's buddy wasn't a talkative one and Iwaizumi surely didn't want to talk with him anyway, but not talking would have been strange as well. The atmosphere clearly changed, it became much darker and heavier. It felt like having a heavy burden pushed down on him. Every step he took, every step away from Oikawa and the reassuring assemblance in the entrance hall, made it more difficult to breathe and stay calm. Not getting anxious or even worse: frightened.
“So...does Mr Seokijn often invite guests over to his special collection or is it something you have to prove yourself be worthy to?” he chit-chatted, following him outside the room to some more unoccupied area of the villa. Walking down the corridor, getting to the staircase and going downstairs. The marble stairs even reflecting his silhouette a bit.
Woojin turned his head over his shoulder.
“Only for special guests” he gave back an undefined smile, “I can reassure you, this will be a unique experience.”
Yeah...tell me about it... nique as in extraordinary or unique as in once-and-then-dead?!
“So...it doesn’t look like some room for degustation” Iwaizumi murmured, when they arrived in another room which only had necessary furniture inside. Like some storage room but without all the things you would just throw in here to have them out of sight for others. Of course, there weren't any drinks, a bar or whatever. The forensic doctor hadn't expected it, of course. At least it didn't look like a bad 50-shades-of-Grey torture chamber.
“Don’t worry. It is.”
Hajime’s heart started pounding, and the corner of his mouth lifted to a wry smile.
Well let’s get this done...
“Contact your accessory. You won’t get the chance to speak to him again.”
Woojin turned around, beginning to take off his jacket. He put it neatly folded on the bureau, standing in a corner of the room. Undoing his cufflinks on the left side, he rolled up his sleeve.
Damn this guy...he was well-built with muscles. Strong. Gulping, Iwaizumi straightened. He watched the other carefully, but that one just kept undressing unnecessary parts like his tie now. Getting ready.
He meant it.
Reaching for the small ear mic, Iwaizumi touched it lightly.
"Guess we have a problem here" he muttered and didn't even need to be aware of whispering anymore, "We're leaked out...“
He exhaled, looking up to Woojin who cracked the bones of his neck, tilting his head from side to side.
When Oikawa suddenly heard Iwaizumi's breathing in his ear a little shiver ran down his spine. By looking at Seokjin, who gave him an amused look he must have had the horror of death right to be seen in his eyes. But he couldn't care for that now, not when he knew that somewhere in this house Iwaizumi was...
“I know! I know it, damn it!! Get out of there!” the detecticive shouted in the mic, but Iwaizumi seemed not to listen to him. Or he just couldn’t.
"Focus on Seokijn and get yourself out of here..." Iwaizumi said, while Woojin took a step towards him.
“Iwa-chan please, please!” Oikawa yelled at him, trying to get to him. Trying to influence the situation which he couldn't control. He couldn't control what would happen to Iwaizumi.
"Don’t worry. I won’t die that easily. Still..." and now he whispered his last words, which he hoped not to be his true last ones, "I guess, being your husband isn’t so bad."
With that he ended and shut down the connection.
*
Kim Seokjin took his last sip and put the emptied glass on the counter.
“Don’t worry about your man, he’s not my target” he clarified, straightening up now, “You are” he added and Oikawa was immediately surrounded by two of his buddies. Bulky, not like the one who took the forensic doctor with him.
Oikawa sighed, frustrated. The only thing he could think of at that moment was his fake spouse.
God, he dragged him all along in that damn case he could've done alone!
If anything happened now...it was going to be his fault again. The same mistake he already made once. Causing someone to die.
He didn't fight back as they dragged him by the arms out of the hall and to another room: Kim Seokjin's private office.
He didn't even try to kick himself free, as he couldn't die there. The priority was to arrest that shithead, but right now...Oikawa's priority changed.
The most important thing was to stay alive, so there would be a tiny chance that Iwaizumi could survive this.
If he himself died...fine. But not that forensic doctor, who deserved so much more than being murdered. So much more than being with Oikawa.
They pushed him down on a simple chair, fettering him, his arms rotated backward, so thet his hands rested on the back rest.
“Are you really that stupid to think I wouldn’t recognise the great Japanese detective Oikawa Tooru?”
Kim Seokjin smirked, standing right in front of him and looking down. Something he loved to do with his opponents.
“Yeah, I underestimated my fame. Would you mind telling my friends that? They don’t believe I’m the best detective” Oikawa still had the guts to tease, grinning, but therefore, he got punched by one of the buddies in an instant, making him spit some blood out of his mouth.
“Tch...” he stared at the criminal boss with hatred.
“You’re truly something, joking like that before you die” Seokjin commented, pulling out a little plastic bag with the drugs from his inner jacket.
Still, the detective laughed, irritating the boss for a brief second. Frowning then, his eyebrows knitted together and now he really showed the cruel side, which actually revealed his true self: “I’ll shut your mouth and ass pretty soon, you little gay shit, don't you worry.”
“Oh, you won’t!”
Another punch. And a third. And a fourth too.
As many as it was needed for that damn grinning fagot to finally shut up!
“What the hell are you talking about?!” the boss yelled, annoyed about the way Oikawa didn't seem to be intimidated at all.
However, the detective didn't have to reply to that: suddenly police sirens were to be heard from afar, getting closer with speed.
“You little...” Seokjin stared at him, as he recognised that that was a step to his own defeat like in the game of chess.
Check!
“Guess you’ve underestimated me too” Oikawa whispered with the little voice he had left, blood spilling out of his mouth. They really had aimed for the right spots on his head, making him seeing the stars.
He then shook his head lightly, as the microphone already dangled out of it by being beaten up like that and it fell down to his feet. The typical earphone-mic with a gps-tracker in it.
Checkmated!
“Then...leave me the pleasure to kill you with my own hands!” the boss gnarled, pulling out a gun from his belt. If he should go down there, he wouldn't go without killing that moron!
“What an honor, for a man who doesn’t like to get his hands dirty” Oikawa grinned, looking him in the eye.
So...that was it?
*
Iwaizumi tried to stay calm. Relaxed.
The last time he had a fight...well, clearly during his practices with the police officers. Self-defending class. It has been some program they all had to undergo. Working for justice and also on first degree murder cases and as one of the best forensic groups in Japan, he clearly had to be cautious and able to fight too.
Putting out the earphone, Iwaizumi opened the jacket of his suit, putting it aside over the chair next to the desk. Also opening the cuffs on his sleeve, as his opponent had, and rolling up the sleeves. Loosening his tie, he looked at Woojin.
At least, he was a gentleman and didn't go for a back attack. He had put off his gun too, as the forensic doctor noticed.
“Ready to serve as a bedside carpet?” Woojin announced, so Iwaizumi smirked back.
“You can’t even do an autopsy right and wanna stuff me? Bad choice. Let me show you how this works.”
And suddenly, the guy rushed towards him, striking for a punch that Iwaizumi was able to dodge smoothly. He concentrated on his best skill: his sensitivity for details. His knowledge about anatomy and physiology. And his experience of doing some boxing sessions...how his opponent moved. How he lunged.
It helped to avoid further punches, but it wouldn't let Iwaizumi succeed.
Just after he hit Woojin with his right hand as a counter strike, hitting him in the face, he felt a much stronger bump against his stomach. Almost throwing up, Iwaizumi stumbled a few steps backwards, losing his balance. Seokjin's best man took the chance and kicked him with his knee against the jaw. His teeth grinded, he heard his bones crunching and maybe his jawbone even broke. Groaning, Iwaizumi didn't have the time to whine and had to pull himself together. Right timing to dodge while tumbling to the side. Shit...he needed a little helper: snd this one was right next to the desk, where Woojin had put the gun. Iwaizumi reached for it, but was tugged back by his opponent in an instant.
“Not so fast” he said.
However he got the forensic doctor in the best position possible: having his arm in front of him, he could use the momentum. He suddenly bent down, pulling on the left arm of Woojin and threw him on the ground. He jumped on him, but was still not able to get to the weapon he only wanted to smash the other's head with. Woojin therefore rolled him over, grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, with sparkles of blood on it.
This was when the police sirens introduced the soon arriving of the squad.
Both of them stared at each other in shock, but Iwaizumi was faster and let speak his left hand, crushing Woojin’s nose with his fist...so much that he tumbled back too, against the cupboard which fell over with a loud noise.
Silence.
Iwaizumi sat there. Panting. Looking at his hand...the wedding band had had his usage now.
“Never mess with a married man, asshole.”
Woojin was only half unconscious, but that was good enough. He had a minute to breathe, when footsteps were to be heard outside. Also screams and yelling from the other guests, because the party was over, as the police entered all uninvited. Suddenly the door flung open, they ran inside, clearing the room.
“Where’s Oikawa?” Daichi stepped forward, opening his visor and bending down to Iwaizumi who just recognised his colleague of the police. Two of the other turning Woojin on his stomach and applying the cuffs quickly.
The forensic doctor looked up, still addled from the punches, but suddenly the question got him startled.
“He isn’t-? You haven’t-?!” he went pale. And furious.
“That fucking bastard...” Iwaizumi's blood rushed and he felt his muscles becoming tense, “I don’t know. I don’t fucking know!” he blurted then, clearly worried.
Iwaizumi tried to think of something. Some place. Some possibility where they could have brought him.
“Somewhere private. Somewhere...” he rubbed his temples, “Cellar? No...there isn’t...O-office?!”
He put on the earphone, trying to get some noise out of it. Anything which could help them to find the place without going through each room as they wouldn't have the time.
At the moment Iwaizumi had heard the sirens, Oikawa and Seokjin would have, too. And this meant, that Oikawa's life was shortly to come to an end.
“...me the pleasure to kill you...” - it suddenly came out of the little earphone.
Oh God, no!
"We go from here!“
"No, first floor!“ Iwaizumi blurted, reminding himself that there was no need to yell at Daichi. He got up again, with the support of the police man and tried to get his balance back, "I mean...just a feeling, but..." he hoped he was right.
And Daichi couldn't stop him like this. Enraged, cleary worried as fuck. In all these years they had been working together, it was the first time seeing the forensic doctor like this. Even the cases where his own team was badly involved hadn't made him look like that: heartbroken, sick of worries. What he felt for the detective was something else, Daichi was sure.
And so he rushed after him, right as Iwaizumi, without any protection vest, started to run.
Fortunately the police officers hold him back - they had to clear the way and just then they would be able to intrude the room...if it was the right one. Two men of Seokjin waited in front of a door, they had to knock them out fast.
While Daichi's assistant was hitting the first, the second wanted to go after him.
The officer was quick, got him with a delicate hit against the backside of his knee and bringing him to those.
They could hear the boss' speaking from the inside, and it only made Iwaizumi's blood boiling even more.
“Tsk, you’re just a coward!” Oikawa commented with put on bravery, as he gained another kick in his ribs by one of the buddies.
“You’re great at talking, Mr Detective. Let’s see if you will be with a bullet in your chest too?” the boss suggested, as he pointed his gun at him. “Do you have any prayers before you die? To your husband, perhaps?” but right after he laughed.
“Oh sorry, you two aren’t even married, right?”
Although the officer called out to him, Iwaizumi slammed the door open, aiming with the gun he had taken from Woojin.
"Well, nothing we cannot change, but you homophobic bastard won’t be invited anyway." Hajime announced himself, looking dead serious at him, "Put down the gun. Else I won’t hesitate to shoot."
Kim Seokjin bursted out to laugh, as he pointed his gun now at Iwaizumi.
“You’re so brave, still so stupid” the boss said. “Who should I kill first?”
“Put your gun down” Daichi said behind Hajime, pointing his own at the boss.
“I’ll kill your dear fake husband, Mr detective. You’ll regret this like the last time when you lead your other partner to death” Seokjin said as he smirked, now looking at Iwaizumi.
Hajime had to stay focused but hearing that...
His other...?
Oikawa straightened up, a terrified, yet determined expression, as a gunshot was to be heard in the room.
Iwaizumi heard the shot too, as he was dragged down to the floor by Daichi.
Irritated, he looked up. The police officer wasn't injured.
His eyes looked in shock at Oikawa...no, he hadn’t been hit by it either. But...their enemy was.
Hajime heard a cracking voice next to Daichi, a message via mic: "Got the target."
And then he realised...from outside!
The boss had been standing in front of a window and the special unit seemed to have a sniper...holy shit.
Seokjin trembled, letting go of the gun. He wasn't mortally wounded, but just enough that he couldn't shoot with his hand anymore, a nice shot through the shoulder.
The police comes in, bringing him down to the floor, but...all Hajime could think of, all he could do...
"Tooru!" he almost cried out, pulling himself up, stumbling and hastening to the detective who was in such an awful state.
Hajime couldn't keep balance, falling to his knees and looking up, utterly worried to his very core.
His hands were shaky, as he reached for the other's cheeks, as another police officer was finally untying him.
“God...are you...are you alright?!” Hajime didn't know where to look at first.
“Heiji...” Oikawa whispered, clearly hallucinating now.
The gunshot set him crazy.
“You’re still alive...” Tooru added, smiling.
“Of course I am” Hajime said, trying to give back a smile but only stiffened.
Heiji...?!
“I’m glad...” then, Oikawa fainted, still smiling happily and relieved.
"As I promi...Tooru?!”
Everything went too fast for Hajime to catch up with.
The arresting, the ambulance that was called, both being send to the hospital, the first aid examinations...
Hajime was half absent-minded. Once he got some plasters and painkillers, he would have been able to go back home. But he refused.
"Can I...visit Oikawa?" he said quietly and they lead him to his room.
Seeing the detective lying on the bed, all wrapped up in bandages and in that hospital gown, he had to stay at least for the night. Hajime sat down on a chair, looking at the still unconscious detective and exhaling deeply.
Taking Oikawa's hand in his, he somehow managed to keep back his tears. But as he watched the detective, stroking over his hand with his fingertips, he remembered how he called him in that room...
Heiji...is it...was he...his partner or...maybe more? The one he lost?
Oikawa now was unconscious, but he was so alive in his mind, wondering.
He was in some sort of room, and he saw a lot of flowers.
“Tooru” someone called.
He turned back, looking at figure who spoked.
“Heiji...” he whispered, surprised, almost in tears.
“Heiji...you’re...you’re alive...” Oikawa said between sobs, smiling incredulous.
“I’m not” the figure said, stopping Oikawa from approaching him.
“You...aren’t?” the detective asked, confused and terrified.
“I’m not. And you won’t be too soon, Iwaizumi won’t need you anymore” Heiji said, holding out his hand.
Oikawa hesitated, and didn't take his hand.
“I-Iwachan...needs me” he said, contemplating the emptiness.
“Then wake up” the other smiled lovingly.
“But I won’t see you anymore” Oikawa said in tears.
“I’m always with you” Heiji replied, then his vision blurred.
Oikawa opened his eyes and found himself in a hospital room. What the hell...happened? It meant they had finally arrested Kim Seokjin?! It had to be so!
But someone crossed his mind...someone who had been taken away from him that night, in that damn party...
“Iwachan” he says, with a low voice, but then yells.
“IWACHAN! Where's Iwachan?! Please, I-Iwa...” then a nurse entered the room, panicking.
“Oikawa-san, please don’t yell, you’re under...” she tried to say, but Oikawa was clearly not in his mind.
Iwaizumi had left some minutes before to take a coffee at the vending machine, because Kuroo clearly told him not to stay there 24/7, so he was now offering him a drink.
Hajime had sat there for minutes...maybe hours...he didn't know.
But when he was suddenly called out by the nurse, he stood up puzzled, only to find the chemist standing in front of him.
"Kuroo...?!"
"Hey, come...let’s go for some coffee. You’ll get dehydrated." Kuroo smiled with compassion and pointed over to the exit of the ward.
Hajime hesitated, but he knew it’s better if he moved around from time to time, get some fresh air, etc.
"If you know by any chance...do the others...?"
He looked up and Kuroo nodded lightly.
"Yeah...but I’ve already told them you’re fine. Akane-chan is a little mess right now, but Akaashi reassured her. Don’t worry."
They went to the vending machine, getting some black coffee.
Staying in silence, Kuroo glanced to him, watching him from head to toe.
"Geez...Iwaizumi, you look awful. And that’s not for your scratches."
Staying silent, the forensic doctor exhaled. Unconsciously, he was playing with the ring on his hand.
"And since when are you married?!"
"It... was a fake act for the case" he murmured, taking out his coffee but wasn't so eager to drink it.
Looking inside the fluid, he got lost in thoughts again. Kuroo put his hands on his hips.
"Listen. Tooru is a very special case of a person. I know it’s-"
"By any chance, did he have some partner called Heiji?!" Hajime cut in and got Kuroo into an uncomfortable state.
He didn't want to blab. Especially if he didn't know how much he could tell. Not that he has known every detail...
"That’s something you should ask him himself" he tried.
"So he did?"
Kuroo sighed, clearly uncomfortable. He didn’t want to spill out something that Oikawa didn’t want him to.
“Listen, I don’t know if Oikawa will tell you something, but try to ask him. I can’t tell you much anyway” Kuroo said, straightening up.
Hajime looked up at him, putting his mouth in a thin line.
"Yeah...you’re right, I know..." he sighed, sipping from the coffee. "It’s just...I don’t know..." he drank up in silence, then threw the cup into the bin.
"But first...it’s more important he gets well soon...I’m just glad...we made it in time." straightening his shoulders, he turned around, "I’ll...go back" he said with a faint smile, feeling somehow foolish and embarrassed.
Suddenly, they heard someone yelling. Oikawa’s voice.
“It seems he’s awake” Kuroo joked, as they both ran through Oikawa’s room.
As Hajime heard his voice, a shiver was sent down his spine.
“Tooru!” he bursted out, looking at the yelling detective and approaching his bed “I’m here. I’m here okay?!”
As Iwaizumi entered the room, calling him by his name, Oikawa’s eyes widened.
Iwaizumi bent down, taking his hand, rubbing it with his. Oikawa's heart was racing and beating fast, due to the anxiety.
“Iwachan...” he just said, as Iwaizumi rubbed his hand, calming him down.
“You’re...real? Are you really...here?” he asked, incredulous, touching his cheek.
“Yes...yes, it’s me” Iwaizumi repeated, looking him into the eyes and giving him a wry smile, “It’s me...I’m real, I’m here. It’s okay...”
As he felt Oikawa’s hand on his bandaged cheek, he put his own hand on his. “Everything is okay now...”
Shit...he couldn’t hold his composure together.
Tears filled his eyes, his vision became blurry, so he had to blink, but it didn't help.
Biting his lip, he lowered his head, closing now both hands around the detective's one, kissing it and muttering with suppressed sobs over and over.
“Thank God...you’re alive...you’re...you’re awake...I’m so glad...”
Smiling, Kuroo left the room with the nurse, leaving them alone.
Oikawa was shocked by the forensic doctor's gesture, but he then smiled sweetly.
“I told you, I’m hard to kill” he said, joking and laughing, trying to reassure him.
There was something Oikawa learned from that experience: he absolutely couldn’t stand Iwaizumi crying.
“Don’t you dare cry, Iwaizumi Hajime” he said, seriously, rubbing his cheeks to wipe off his tears.
“Don’t you dare worry for me ever again. Didn’t you say you trusted me?” he added, looking at him in the eyes.
When Hajime heard his words, he just shook his head, but a laughter mixed with sobbing came out of his throat too. And being forced to look at Oikawa, as he got his tears wiped off, he only stared at him for some seconds, but then gave him a cracked smile.
“Idiot...I do. I trust you. But don’t you dare ever again insulting me to be a party pooper, Oikawa Tooru” he replied, still remembering that one sentence, “I’m actually one to have for a party” he joked.
But he was sure about two things at the same moment: first, he liked how Oikawa said his name. Second...he would worry again. He had never been so scared and anxious since...swallowing, he only manages to say: “I’m glad...”
Oikawa laughed heartily, then tightened his grip on Hajime’s hand sweetly. His hand started to feel so warm...it reached right to his heart.
“I was so afraid that they...look what they have done to your face! You won’t be able to find a proper girlfriend again!” he said seriously, but then joking. It wasn’t a joke though. He was really concerned about him and his happiness, he didn’t even know why.
“I won’t find one anyway, you know that. Too grumpy and having wrinkles, and so on. Especially now that I’m fakingly married and have smashed someone’s face with the wedding band” Iwaizumi teased back, but he got that Oikawa was really concerned.
“Can I ask you something?” Oikawa then said, hesitantly, letting go of Hajime’s grip on his hand.
“Sure” he reassured him, with a calming voice.
“Why...why did you call me by my first name?” Tooru said, looking at him, serious.
Of all questions...he looked irritated, then had to give it a proper thought.
"I..." he did. Twice. First at the party and then some minutes before....ah no. Thrice, if he counts the time in the restaurant, giving him that nickname Tooru-chan too...
He bit his lip, still looking into Oikawa's eyes. Then, with flattering eyelids, he replied more quietly.
"Sorry...if I...offended you. I guess...I-I was just terrified?! I...was so worried... It came out before I knew it?! You know, wearing the heart on the sleeve and so..."
Was that a reasonable explanation?
Ah stop punching my chest, damn heart.
He swallowed.
Offending me?! It was so damn cute, you calling my name like that...
Oikawa smiled, then rested against the bed, closing his eyes for a moment.
“You have to tell me about that trauma of yours, you’re too worried that someone would leave your side” the detective then said, opening his eyes and staring at him with an understanding look.
Oikawa didn't agree nor disagree, so he still didn't know if it had been okay, but...at least he didn't seem to be too bothered?!
However, just as if he was caught red handed, Hajime stared back and his eyebrows slightly knitted. His hand just clenched a bit.
"Tell me..." he quietly replied, "The way you sometimes look at me gives me chills because you look terrified...and what that bastard said, as well as...when you hallucinated a bit..." he broke off, lowering his gaze.
"If you don’t want to tell me, I totally get it...but I can sense it. Also...if you put on a fake smile or not.“
Yeah, wearing his heart on his sleeve.
Oikawa looked at him confused, and now somehow nervous and feeling uncomfortable.
“What do you mean?” he asked. “You’re the one we’re talking about here”
"I just want to say...nobody can look at you with the compassion you showed me, without having experienced something on his own."
Hajime exhaled but changed the subject now, focusing on himself.
"Actually...it shouldn’t be something that can trigger me that much...it happened years ago. Twenty? I guess."
Hajime's eyes watched some invisible spot. Still having Oikawa's hand in his own, his fingertips ran over it. Softly. Being lost in thoughts, throwing himself back in the past.
“My father was an asshole...not when I was a kid, but around...yeah, around age ten he started to be like that. He left us one morning. He didn’t come back from his late shift. Just as this. My mom did her best to raise me, overworked herself, but she was always caring and smiling”
He had to smile by himself, but it was a sad one.
“With marrying my father, she had broken all the bonds with her parents who were against this marriage...they didn’t trust him, as she told me one day.”
Hajime paused, exhaled shakily and inhaled likewise, “As I said...she overworked. She always said ‘it’s fine, it’s fine! I’m here!’ , but it broke her. She got depression, hard episodes. Couldn’t afford all the needed medical treatment and therapy. I couldn’t stand seeing her like this, but still I was too young to help her. I even went to my grandparents’ place and they just said it was her own fault, and that I should start working or something like that. I tried to find my father, but he had left no clues. Nothing."
Iwaizumi allowed himself to take a breath.
"And one day...my mother promised me that she would have waited for me to come home after school's closing ceremony. Making me my favourite dish...she didn’t. I came home and found her with an overdose of drugs she should have taken every day...she had saved them for that I guess. Afterwards I was being sent to a youth centre for high school. End of the story.”
Hajime still had that strange faint smile on his face.
“Well...good thing is, I found what I’m best in: analysing, finding hints, and so on. Trying to solve cases, so that at least the bereaved can find their peace and justice can take place. And I’ve never thought I’d enjoy that work so much. Really” he tried to sound so optimistic now, because he didn't want to be dragged down again to that river of mourning and desperation. He wanted to find the good things in everything, just how he had always done, else he wouldn't have made it up until now.
As Oikawa listened to Hajime’s story, he could sense it finally: Hajime was a strong man. Stronger than anyone he had ever known. Stronger than him.
Oikawa thought that nothing could ever compare to what he had experienced, and somehow, nothing could. But Hajime’s story was so heartbreaking, so...devastating.
Oikawa didn’t know if it’s because he was beaten up, or because of the painkiller they gave him, but he felt emotional for the first time. He could sense them: feelings. Until now, he had always been so careless, only thinking about himself, and especially he didn’t care about other’s feelings.
He held Hajime’s hand tight, and tried to be strong in front of him, and not to cry. He succeeded. The forensic doctor felt the strong pressure on his hand, which dragged him back to reality, back to the present.
“I...never thought you had such a painful past...” he said, lowering his gaze, almost feeling guilty for how he had treated him the first time they met.
“Nobody knows until you’re telling, right?” he looked up to him, finding Oikawa with his lowered eyes and somehow slightly trembling lips. But he found his composure, holds it, when he continued.
“I’m so sorry I put you in danger last night. I’ll be sure to never do it again. Ever. I want you to be happy, to find some nice girl that will never leave you and that you can be happy with. I really wish you that” Oikawa said, smiling tenderly, as he removed the ring from his finger and gave it to Hajime.
“You can use these rings when you’ll propose to her. Make sure to find a pretty girl with the head on her shoulders though, not just some chick” he said, his smile never fading, as he spoke sincerely.
What was it? Why...why didn't those words cause happiness? Or relief? Why did it cause him heartache?!
As Oikawa’s smile remained, Hajime’s expression got more and more nervous. And as the detective spoke about girls, marriage, as he...removed the ring...
“Stop it” Hajime whispered, lowering his head as he didn't give the slightest try to take the ring.
"Just...don’t do this. Why do you want me so utterly getting married?! That’s...this is...this is upsetting" he blurted, but trying to stay calm, at least quiet.
“And don’t apologise for something I’ve chosen on my own! I was more than sober when I decided to participate and be your partner in this case. And I don’t regret it.”
He looked up to him then, just for a moment. He didn't know what else to say, what to do, so he took the ring and put it on Oikawa’s finger in a rush, closing his hand around it.
“And I’d rather partner up with you again than being a fucking boring houseman.”
He paused, sighed and quietly said, “I know you mean what you say...I really know. But I can’t. Not...yet. Maybe never.”
Oikawa, a little surprised by Hajime’s words and actions, lowered his gaze, then stared outside the window. Hajime pressed his lips together, watching him with a thoughtful expression.
“I just wanted you to have what I could never have” he said, sighing.
"I appreciate your intentions. It’s not...that I don’t. Please, don’t misunderstand this” the forensic doctor just stated clear.
“I need some rest, please leave” Oikawa added, closing his eyes.
He didn’t mean to sound rude, but that pretty escaped his lips in that harsh tone.
Feeling uncomfortable himself now, it didn't surprise him that he was being sent away by Oikawa. Sounding harsh, of course that ached, but maybe after all...it was just like that.
“Okay” Hajime quietly agreed, squeezing his hand one last time, letting then go slowly. He stood up, thinking for a moment as he walked to the door.
"I still want to know you better. And maybe one day...you'll tell me what pressures your heart so much that you shut yourself out...I'll come visit you again tomorrow. Sleep tight” he said, before leaving.
Oikawa frowned at his words. Once Iwaizumi left, the detective let the tears he tried so hard to suppress flow down his cheeks. He didn’t even know why he was crying. Maybe it was just the stress he had to go through that night. The fear of losing a partner again, the guilty feeling that he had constantly inside his head, that remembered him that he was an awful person.
He didn’t deserve Hajime’s concern, nor his care. He looked down at the ring the forensic doctor put on his finger again and, after a few seconds, he removed it.
It wasn’t meant to be like this between them. Oikawa would've stopped their relationship, if they have ever had one in the first place. He didn’t want Iwaizumi to care for him, he didn’t want him to suffer.
He deserved better.
Oikawa stood up, removing that damn hospital dress and putting his own clothes on, then he left the hospital, not caring about the nurses that were searching him everywhere.
*
Hajime’s way lead him not at home, but to the morgue.
He had at least to show himself to Akaashi and Akane. The latter one cried immediately. He told Akaashi that he hadn't been able to emergency call him, but thanked him for his patience and then he just embraced both of them. Holding on them, just a second.
“You’re really strange recently” Akane murmured, but all Hajime could do was laughing.
Then she asked her mentor about Oikawa and he tried to reassure her that he was okay, but of course he kept worrying. That talk hadn't end well, but maybe it was just the stress of that night.
He was sent home by both of them and for now, he just obeyed.
Going home, he had a hot shower. He then laid down in bed, taking off the ring...but his mind was still too occupied by the stuff that happened that day.
His body was too exhausted to send him dreams.
Chapter 8: The detective who disappeared
Summary:
“Don’t tell me-" Oikawa began, but the other male interrupted him.
“What to do. I know. You don’t listen to anyone!” he completed the detective's sentence with a tiny smirk, “But just listen to what I’ve said to you. Just this once.”
Oikawa shook his head slightly, and then he blinked...he was alone again.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The next day, he still felt knackered.
Every bone seemed to hurt and when he stood in front of the long mirror, already in his pants but still with the shirt in his hands, he noticed some of the bruises which were decorating his toned upper body.
Definitely two more weeks until they would disappear...
The bandages on his cheeks were still clean.
Pulling the long-sleeve shirt over his head, Iwaizumi's eyes focused on the ring on his nightstand as he reached for his normal wrist watch too. The ring...he remembered how he...
“What a freakin’ idiot am I?” he scolded himself with a snarl, and went out of his bedroom to the small kitchen in order to prepare himself breakfast, and letting normality set in again.
Half an hour later he was already off to work, but before he went to the morgue...he wanted to visit someone, as he'd promised him. But even in his car, he couldn't calm down and was upset about his stupid self.
“I should've just took that damn ring and said thank you - but no! I was as straightforward as an idiot could be!" Iwaizumi hit the horn accidentally, and flinched because another horn echoed behind him.
He rolled his eyes and made his way to the hospital in silence. Arriving there, he went with the elevator a few floors up, got off and asked the nurse at the counter of the ward for Oikawa Tooru.
“I’m sorry, but there is nobody named Oikawa Tooru hospitalized here” the nurse replied, looking up from the screen she'd searched for the patient she'd never heard of.
"W-what...?! But h-he was?! He was here yesterday!" Iwaizumi insisted in confusion, "I’ve been treated here too and...where is the doctor who discharged him?"
That can't be! He couldn't...he couldn't have just...! Iwaizumi felt his blood boiling in his veins. Oikawa clearly had discharged himself and the proof just called out to him.
“I don’t know, no one discharged him, as he hasn't been here? His name is...oh, wait!” the nurse scrolled down the list, "Yes...Oikawa Tooru. From the ER...um, strange. He should've been transferred to our ward yesterday night. I guess somebody missed to transfer the data?"
She stood up now, mumbling something and asking a colleague, leaving Iwaizumi alone. As soon as she wasn't to be seen anymore, he peeked around the counter, looking at the list on the screen too. And yes...he should have been transferred there. Exhaling harshly, he left the ward with furious steps and took the stairs to get to the morgue, trying to release the anger he felt growing in his stomach.
"Kuroo?!" his voice sounded angry, as he flung the labratory's door open and looked for the chemist. He didn't see him, so Iwaizumi stepped in, turning around and flinched as he saw him laying on a stretcher with a blanket over.
"Sorry to wake you, but have you heard from Oikawa?" he said straightforwardly, dragging him off his snooze from overwork.
Kuroo stretched intensely before opening his eyes, still sleepy.
“What did he do this time?” he asked, as he yawned.
"That's it: nothing. Vanished. Discharged himself!" Iwaizumi snarled, getting louder with every sentence and throwing his arms in the air, "I told him I'd come back! He knew that! And...he just left! As if...as if...I don’t know!" he ruffled his hair and sighed, "He clearly is not okay!"
If Iwaizumi had known Oikawa better...he would've been still angry, but not surprised about the detective's behaviour at all. Kuroo sat up, yawned and then looked at the forensic doctor, who was nearly going insane just by being dumped like that.
“Listen, he is a crappy guy” Kuroo began, as if it was a fact universally acknowledged by anyone, “He discharged himself plenty of times, this is not a first. He...he simply hates hospitals."
Iwaizumi gruffed and wasn't so pleased with that answer. Because he thought so too...Oikawa was just that kind of guy.
"No one likes hospitals. And I work in the basement of one."
"So, the question is...why do you care so much about him?”
It got Iwaizumi startled and for a few seconds he absolutely didn't know what to say. How to reply. Just being able to stare at the chemist, he blinked away, trying to find the right answer. If there was a right one.
"O-of course I care for him. I mean...I almost saw him being shot and...and he also cared for me when I was drunk by an unwanted glass of sake and-" Iwaizumi stopped talking when he saw Kuroo's smile.
"What is that smile about?”
“You’re just such a good influence to him” Kuroo shrugged with that little grin he was accused of, “But...don’t feel bad if he just disappears. It’s a natural reflexe. Some mechanism of self protection, after what happened to him” he says quietly, but suddenly someone knocked on the door and called for him.
The chemist looked up, but it was something urgent. He jumped up from the stretcher, straightening his clothes and rubbing the back of his head.
“H-hey...what do you mean by that? Kuroo!”
But only getting a slight wave by the other male as a response, he was left alone once more.
Good influence? How?
He barely had done anything. The forensic doctor sighed, lowering his shoulders. He couldn't just go off from work now, searching for that jerk he hadn't had any clue about at all.
Moreover, they had an important autopsy that day, and so he had to concentrate and put his thoughts and concerns aside. Heading now to the morgue, he took off his jacket and hung it on the wardrobe hook.
“Good morning" he heard Akaashi's gentle voice as he entered and nodded to him. Akane was at home, as it was her day off.
His colleague had the body already prepared, with all of the tools they would need. Putting on the disposable apron, gloves and mask, they started, getting their work done. But after an hour Iwaizumi couldn't concentrate too much. He wasn't able to get Kuroo’s damn question out of his mind!
“Is it so weird to care for someone you spent time with?” he muttered to himself.
Akaashi looked up, standing still while holding a tool.
“I-Iwaizumi-san...are you alright?” he asked with concern.
His chief just seemed to be off that day. No, not only that day...recently. Since he started working with that detective, his whole attitude had changed a bit. He was grumpier, but also more focused. He was more emotional, but also more isolated. Trying to...hide himself? Trying to find out what it was, what changed him?
Akaashi was a very observant man and, although Iwaizumi couldn't find the answer yet, he had one for him: Oikawa had happened. Simply as that.
Stepping from the stretcher where the dead body was laying, Iwaizumi turned to the small sidetable and wrote down what they had found.
“Yeah, yeah” he nodded, “Just tired because of yesterd-?"” he stopped mid-sentence, staring at the paper in disbelief and rolling his eyes. Ripping the sheet, he crumpled it before Akaashi could notice what he had wrote: 'Lungs: NAD. Heart: finding Oikawa.'
He looked up for a second...he hadn't blew his cover, had he?
“Tired of?” Akaashi repeated his words, still sounding confused, but...actually he knew pretty well. Yes, this was all Oikawa Tooru's fault.
“Nothing. So...lungs NAD. Heart: found some occasional hypertrophy” Iwaizumi corrected himself, writing it down with some blush on his face, well hidden under the mask. His heart was pounding. Before Akaashi could go for another question or addition, someone knocked on the door and stuck his head inside the room.
"Sorry to bother you, but we have some really impatient and pretentious detective who asks for the autopsy report already."
Both doctors shot a look at the newbie who just shifted from one feet to his other: a first year police officer.
It was the perfect timing for Iwaizumi to remind himself to get his shit together. He got back to his usual self pretty fast, as the least thing he could need now was another cocky guy interfering with his work.
“Then please tell him he can move his shitty ass to come down here and do the live session with us, if he’s in a so fucking hurry!”
He didn't even look up, but only asked Akaashi for the finest scalpel. Scared by Iwaizumi's harsh reaction, the newbie stammered a "Y-Y-Yes sir!" as if he had a sergeant in front of him. They heard him stumbling against the wall or anything outside, and the forensic doctor snarled in a low tune.
“Iwaizumi-san...wouldn’t it be better if you calm down a little bit?” Akaashi tried, even if he knew he might receive the same treatment of insults now. How he was holding the scalpel looked a little bit too dangerous. His tight grip was making the tool in his hand tremble.
“I’m perfectly calm” Iwaizumi talked back, remembering how breathing worked, “It’s okay...I just...”
He looked up to Akaashi and realised, what kind of an idiot he made out of himself. Sighing, Iwaizumi shook his head and went on with the autopsy.
Don’t push it...he isn’t to be blamed that you’re such an idiot.
“I’m just a bit upset, I guess. Nothing I should take out on you or anyone else. Sorry...” the forensic doctor murmured and while they were working in silence he took his courage in both hands.
Iwaizumi had never asked someone else for an advice, never asked for someone's opinion if it wasn't for work. He'd never wanted to open up and make the impression of a weak man who wasn't able to stand his ground. He wasn't able to go his way alone.
“Do you think...I’m somehow obsessed with that idiot?! You know...Mr-don’t-interfere-with-my-crime scene. You’re a good observer, Keiji, and...I'm not sure if I would have asked anyone else. You're discreet and the one I trust the most” he murmured shyly, as he was collecting more data.
“It’s normal, I think” Akaashi replied, while examinating the pancreas, and his lips curled up to a smile under his mask, invisible for the other, “You found someone who’s exciting to work with, it’s normal that you’re not used to his disappearance” Akaashi continued, now looking at his chief in the eyes.
Ah...that sounds reasonable.
A short smile crossed Iwaizumi's face.
“Guess you’re right.”
That was it.
Admiration.
Because Oikawa was such a brilliant and excellent detective.
It was thrilling to work with him, that’s why he was so addicted to him. Yeah, it made sense.
Just admiration.
The door flung suddenly open, heavy footsteps entering without permission.
"What the-?!"
Iwaizumi's head raised, staring at the intruder with his black leather jacket, sunglasses on his nose and his IC to be seen, dangling on his upper pocket with a metallic clip.
“I asked for the autopsy’s result. Is it finished?” he only said, not even greeting nor apologising for the rudeness he got in with.
Staring at Akaashi first, he switched to Iwaizumi and then back again.
"Who is the one in charge?"
“And I said move your ass in here and I’ll give you a life report. Else you have to wait. Akaashi, forceps.”
So, that was him? The bugging detective?
“Does it bother you to introduce yourself at least, as you’ve already came in without knocking?”
Iwaizumi could reflect his opposite's kind too well, if he was asked for.
“So, we have a grumpy chief of the morgue here” the detective mumbled, walking towards them.
“My IC is right here, you just have to look. But it seems you can't read, so let me help you” he added in an arrogant tone, taking off his sunglasses, “I’m Miya Atsumu, detective and inspector, wanna know my phone number too?” he smirked at Iwaizumi.
What an asshole.
“I don't read ICs, since most people know to behave properly" the forensic doctor replied while straightening up.
He knitted his eyebrows a bit when he looked the other in his eyes, hearing his name.
Atsumu...oh my, don’t tell me...
There he was: the detective with the inferiority complex, still super full of himself. The short undercut, the blonde top hair, a little too styled. His deep brown eyes looking more than straight into Iwaizumi's olive-green ones.
Swallowing, the only acknowledgment the forensic doctor was able to give now was the one about Miya's knowledge of technique and modern tools for case-solving.
“Iwaizumi Hajime, chief of the morgue. Nice to meet you, detective. Put your number on the board over there. We'll call if we run out of coffee” Iwaizumi gave him his politest smile under the mask.
“Take off your Armani’s or step out of my morgue.”
Iwaizumi understood what was so annoying about that guy in front of him: he didn't want to have another person stepping into Oikawa's shoes, replacing him.
“Actually, I know a place where we can go and drink a coffee later. My treat” Miya didn't bail at all and kept grinning, as he approached the corpse the two doctors were examinating.
Iwaizumi didn't respond to that comment and Akaashi...well, it was interesting to watch that show. He asked himself whether it was for Miya Atsumu's cocky attitude or for the fact that Oikawa was missing, that his chief seemed so eagerly to kick the first one's ass out of the morgue...
“Have you found the alkali metal in his liver?” Miya asked then seriously, stopping his joking and caught them out of the blue.
Akaashi looked at his colleague, his eyes alone asking How the hell does he know?
Iwaizumi stayed silent again, only rolling his eyes.
“Right about to go there” he replied and was already hating that he got distracted from his work, “Guess you already have your theory and only need the proofs?”
The colour of the victim’s eyeballs revealed that there had been acute liver failure. So, if it was because of intoxication, it was no surprise.
“You are quite insightful, Mr handsome-grumpy-doctor. I may think of taking you as my assistant” Atsumu winked at him with his flirty attitude.
“Oh, stop it. I’d rather bury myself than being an assistant of yours!" Iwaizumi proceeded and hoped that he would finish quickly. However, they needed fifteen more minutes.
"Okay...that’s it. Akaashi, start the analysis immediately. Full toxicology and also check up electrolytes due to the hypertrophy. I wanna be sure that we haven’t overseen something important regarding the alkali intoxication."
Working as if Miya wasn't there, he went over to his desk, closing the autopsy report with a few sentences for the record and bent over the desk to check the list of procedure.
“Wait” the detective interrupted again, pulling out his smart-watch and pressing a small button, switching on the flashlight. He aimed it at the victim's stomach, which glowed in a light phosphorescent green in an instant.
“I knew it...” Atsumu murmured, switching his watch off again, “No need for toxicology. This is lithium. And he clearly died from brain death, that’s what being intoxicated by lithium includes” he explained confidently and totally forgetting that he had two excellent professionals in front of him.
Iwaizumi stiffened and so did Akaashi...saying nothing, just exchanging looks, the forensic doctor exhaled firmly.
"All need for toxicology since we still have a hypertrophic heart which can be physiological but also pathological, and if it’s not only for a murder, I’d like to get this job done right."
He was totally off the line, and Iwaizumi didn't even try to hide it.
"Nevertheless, it's great that you payed attention during your lessons in toxicology!"
He wasn't absolutely in the mood. Putting his pen down, Iwaizumi walked slowly towards him.
"Miya Atsumu" he spoke the other's name with some kind of sassy intonation, stopping right in front of him, "The modern tech detective, right? I wonder why you didn’t go for forensics though."
Miya's eyebrows lifted and he almost looked amused. Lowering his gaze for a short moment, he smirked.
“You know my methods, uh? I love chasing criminals, not analyzing bodies” the detective replied honestly, “Speaking of getting your work done...once you’re finished, we can catch a coffee together. I won’t accept no as an answer.”
Something made Iwaizumi's heart jump a bit. His eyes widened too. His face felt warm.
“I’ll be waiting outside”
Staring at Miya in disbelief, he noticed that that man hit on him just in front of his colleague and friend. How bold.
"Then wait for long!" Iwaizumi shouted back.
*
He took his time, obviously longer than needed. Even when they were finished, Iwaizumi took his doctor's coat off in a slower pace than usual, changing into his own again.
"Do you think he's actually waiting?" Akaashi asked with lifted eyebrows, getting a brief shrug in return.
As Iwaizumi walked out of the room, he stopped right in front of the door, staring at the figure leaning against the wall with arms crossed. Atsumu looked up, smirking.
He actually waited. With gritted teeth, Iwaizumi decided to pass him, ignoring him. No way he wanted to go for a coffee and, moreover, he had some other business to do.
“Hey, Mr I’m-too-cool-to-drink-a-coffee-with-you!" Miya called after him, making the forensic doctor's ears go red as they could be overheard well enough. Footsteps followed him, but Iwaizumi never stopped.
“Didn’t you listen? I really want to go for a coffee with you!”
Flinching, Iwaizumi didn't turn around. He clenched his fists to his sides and swallowed.
"Sorry, I'm usually not listening to some overly confident detectives as long as it's not necessary" he barked back, looking to his side as the other caught up now, "And I’m in a hurry, okay?"
He was. He wanted to check Osamu’s. He wantedf to find that damn, handsome, smiling detective who just disappeared from the hospital. He wanted to scold him, argue with him, just...
Hajime sighed and exhaled noisily.
Just making sure he's okay.
“Okay then” Miya said, shrugging, "We’re going for lunch, I know a place that you’ll like for sure!” he suggested, grabbing the other's arm to drag him with him.
Although the forensic doctor complained and tried to break free, Miya wouldn't let him.
"Come on, it's just lunch. Whatever you have to do, you won't make it within an hour. Get your head clear after your hours of working. Take a breath!"
And he was right.
Searching for Oikawa, trying to find him...that wouldn't have worked within sixty minutes. He knew that too well. And he was also right, referring to having a break.
Iwaizumi felt himself drowned in a rush he didn't like. Rushing through the morning, the work, because he was still worried. Rushing because Oikawa had led him to the highway of his, full of speed. And so he obeyed, just this once.
*
When they arrived at Miya's special place of recommendation, Iwaizumi blinked twice. No way.
How could it be that he always ended up here? Showing no reluctance, the cocky detective entered the small restaurant as if it's his family's place.
“Yah, Samu!” the detective greeted and waved over to the owner in the same familiarity.
Iwaizumi followed, noticing how Osamu's calm facial expression changed into a frowning one, when he came around the corner of the kitchen to greet his new guests. They crossed looks and the thick dark eyebrows lifted in surprise.
“What...are you two doing together?” Osamu asked totally confused about that combination.
“We’re here for lunch obviously, and it’s my treat!” Miya explained with a grin, and that was when it hit the forensic doctor: they were twins?!
Yeah, he remembered Oikawa's rant about Atsumu, but that they were actually twins...?!
Osamu and Atsumu seemed so totally different! Furthermore, Osamu didn't make the impression that he was too fond of his brother.
“Then...I’ll make sure you’ll pay triple!” the chef stated in a dark tone, turning back and pointing to the free seats in a corner.
“Wha- I’m your twin brother!” Atsumu yelled, totally offended.
“Then you’ll pay quadruple!”
"Osamu-san" Iwaizumi made himself noticeable in with a stern voice, "I’ll go for the most expensive dish. Make two or three portions. My colleague will appreciate the delicious taste of your food." he said it as seriously as he could.
Hearing Atsumu's complaining now, the detective walked ahead to the free seats and Iwaizumi took the chance to make a quick stop near Osamu, hestitating with his question to come.
"Um...by any chance...did Oikawa came by? Late night or today?" he asked as nonchalantly as possible.
“No, I haven’t heard of him since the day you two came here."
The answer was rather disappointing and Iwaizumi's shoulder sunk.
"Why do you ask? Did something happen to him?” Osamu asked back with concern.
Actually, it seemed as if he cared more for Oikawa than for his own brother. Not giving this too much thought, the other blinked, waving with his hand.
"Ah no, he’s fine, I guess. He just...disappeared, even though...well..." he couldn't explain, "I just hoped, he may have came by because his 'I-come-and-go-whenever-I-like' pisses me off."
Smiling wryly, Iwaizumi followed Atsumu, who had overheard their little talk with the good ears of his, but didn't comment on it.
For a second the shorter man feared, that he would end up in the same corner he had sat with Oikawa, but fortunately that wasn't the case. It was already weird enough to be here with the other detective. Like...cheating on Oikawa.
Sitting down now, the forensic doctor took off his jacket, but didn't remove the scarf.
"Okay, so what are you up to?” he went straightforward with the conversation, “Asking a stranger for lunch...why?”
As if he had expected that question, Atsumu only smiled while leaning back in his chair.
“I just wanted to acknowledge the great doctor's skills that helped me to solve that case!”
Receiving a skeptical glare from Iwaizumi, he sighed and proceeded while looking him with sincerily in his eyes.
“I know why you think this bad of me. Since you've been in touch with Oikawa, he must’ve talked to you about me and how much he hates me and how annoying I am, right?”
Yeah, he was right.
“Actually, you two seem to have more in common than you think” Iwaizumi shrugged, as to wipe off the accuse of taking Oikawa's side. He didn't, as he didn't like to judge people by others' sayings.
“And no, it’s not that it’s all about you. It’s just pretty rare that people will ask you out for lunch, just for something which is clearly my work. Especially when they put on a cocky show in my morgue first.”
“I’m just sure of my methods!” Atsumu shrugged back, “But, fine. I like you.”
He leant in, with a little smirk again, this time it wasn't about being bold or cool. If you watched the detective carefully, you would notice the hint of a blush on his cheeks. He lowered his gaze to Iwaizumi's hand.
“But...I don’t know if I have any chance since...you’re married?”
Iwaizumi would have choked on his drink by now. Not only because Atsumu clarified that he liked him, but also because he mentioned marriage, and then he stared at the forensic doctor's hand.
Don't tell me, I...
When? Why did he put the ring on again?! Oh fuck...
He looked up slowly. He had put it on subconsciously.
“You wouldn’t have a chance anyway” Iwaizumi replied and shrugged, “Upsetting me at the first moment is not the best way to convince me otherwise, isn’t it?”
“I’m sorry, I just wanted to finish my work as soon as I could” Atsumu told him, really sounding sorry for that, but kept observing every Iwaizumi's moves and expressions. He didn't believe him, that marriage he had.
Since Atsumu was a detective, he could tell for sure that there was something off. A lot.
“So, would you stop lying?" he smiled, making Iwaizumi widening his eyes, "You’re not married for real, aren’t you?”
Not commenting on this, Iwaizumi only kept up with the eye-contact they had.
“I can tell by your expression. And Daichi-san told me about the ‘excellent’ plan Oikawa had to arrest Kim Seokjin. Guess that jackass involved you too?” he stated his conclusion, tilting his head a bit to the side while looking at the other man with his dark brown eyes.
You can't run from me.
Okay...he was done. Atsumu had seen right through him.
“Not sure what you’re talking about” Iwaizumi still refused to tell more.
Sighing, he added: “He tried, yes.”
“Daichi-san told me it was a tough case...you must have been shocked and maybe still are?”
"I'm totally fine, thanks. But yes, it was...something really different from the dangerous investigations I had before."
“So... setting things right, here...I assume I still have all the chances? Unless you’re straight”
Atsumu went for a second try and made Iwaizumi narrow his eyes.
"Now I’m more than straight, thank you." he stood up, "I’m off washing hands."
And with that, he walked down the small corridor to go to the toilets. Keeping his posture, keeping his composure, Iwaizumi only gave a quiet growl when he closed the wooden door behind him, standing at the sink and supporting himself with his hands on the porcelain.
"What the hell is this..."
Pulling off the ring to wash his hands and dry them afterwards, he stared at the golden metal. The fake wedding band.
He had put it on this day too. Why, he didn't know. When, he didn't know too.
"Fuck it...you’re messing with my mind, Oikawa..." Iwaizumi mumbled, looking into the mirror and stared a little bit shocked at his image: red ears.
Why the hell did his ears turn red? Because of Atsumu's advances? Or...because that he was fakingly married with Oikawa?
Or...the assumption that maybe he wasn't straight at all?
The shocked expression changed to a more thoughtful one...Iwaizumi had never given it much thought, being straight or not.
It had never appeared as a question anyway: going out with girls, having two relationships and the last time he had also been on dates with Yui...but he had never been satisfied. Because his schedule was so busy with all of his work, he hadn't had much time anyway. He also hadn't felt really happy because of that and...
You’re too scared of someone leaving you.
Remembering Oikawa‘s words he exhaled deepy. Damn it.
*
Osamu approached his brother, as Iwaizumi went to the bathroom.
“What are you planning, brother?” Osamu asked with a narrow look and handing over the meals. They hadn't ordered yet, but it was only natural that he would go for the best he could offer.
“Why do I have to be planning something?!” Atsumu snapped back with an angry look, "Don't accuse me of something I haven't done!"
“I know you, Tsumu. You don’t do anything without purpose.”
Although they didn't get along well with each other, Osamu knew everything about his brother, after all. He knew his attitude, his flaws, his quirks. And he knew that there was always something behind his actions.
But this time, he was wrong as Atsumu showed him with a long sigh and a more gentle look than ever, playing absent-mindedly with the napkin next to his plate, lifting the first layer of the paper tissue.
“Yes, but that's not the case. I find Iwaizumi-kun interesting, really. Nothing more” he replied sincerely with a soft smile, while Osamu’s eyes widened.
This was the first time, he saw his brother really excited for something. He hadn't been like this not even for a case, almost wearing a sheepish smile on his lips, staring dreamily at an invisible spot. Almost like...he really fell for that forensic doctor. Just at first sight.
“Well...I hope he won’t kick your ass before you confess” Osamu sighed, giving up on accusing him of something bad.
“He won’t, because I already did” Atsumu replied, grinning widely like a little child.
“You...what? When?!” his brother almost barked.
“Just a few minutes ago!”
"Tsumu...you're really..."
"I know, I know! You've never seen such a great guy like me!"
"That's not what I wanted to say..."
*
Iwaizumi sighed, closing his eyes for a minute to make up his mind. To come to terms with his thoughts, with Miya Atsumu, with his heart...and although he wasn't totally convinced, he thought of giving it a try. Trying out.
Oikawa said so, right? Trying out, finding a partner...and as annoying he was, the Atsumu guy was interesting too.
There was something beneath the surface. He was sincere, so straightforward and not playing games. Telling him directly that he was interested in him.
Somehow...he liked it. Iwaizumi's left corner of his mouth lifted a bit.
Just as that. A try. He wanted to hear about Atsumu's work. How he worked. He wanted to hear about him, not because Iwaizumi was romantically interested, but just because...it was a chance to get to know someone who wanted to know about him as well.
Straightening himself now, he exaled with a puff and took the ring from the sink, putting it carefully in his pocket. Clearing his throat, he walked out the bathroom and back to his seat. He noticed that Osamu already served their meals.
“So” he announced himself, sitting down again and caused Atsumu looking up with curiousity, “Tell me about you. Anything. Show me why I should grant you a chance.”
Iwaizumi looked at the detective now, challenging him with his words, but there was a little playful smirk on his lips. Something, which hadn't been there before, talking to him.
“You have exactly twenty minutes until I decide whether to have a coffee with you after the meal or just returning to work as soon as I finish here.”
Atsumu, at first surprised, blinked, not believing what he had just heard. And as it set in, the detective smiled back, his eyes showing excitement.
“You won’t regret this!” and he began with his story.
“So...I work for the police, as a detective and inspector, you already know that. I work on the cases which need absolute precision, as my technological methods are infallible. I’m quite confident about me and my work, but if that asshole of Oikawa comes to my crime scene because Daichi-san calls him, I just lose my mind. His methods are so...antique, and he’s super irritating!”
Giving a Tsk Atsumu suddenly realised that he ended up talking about his rival again.
“Sorry, I didn’t intend to talk about that jerk, but...he just irritates me so much, even though he was kicked out by the police and doesn’t work with me anymore. Only his presence is enough set me off.”
Iwaizumi had listened to him carefully, watched him and yeah...that was exactly what Oikawa had told him before too. Nothing new, at first. He even smirked when Atsumu talked about the brunette, all upset, and the forensic doctor agreed to that one point that Oikawa was utterly confusing in his actions and behaviour.
But then...the last sentence caught him in surprise.
“He...was kicked out?” Iwaizumi wrinkled his brows, “So...he hasn’t worked as a private investigator since...when? And you've worked together before? What happened?”
Maybe it wasn't his right to ask for more, but the recent events let Iwaizumi feel some sort of knot in his gut. Something was off and maybe he just found the solution to untangle it all. Atsumu stared at him for a few seconds, surprised that he didn't seem to know anything at all.
“Yes, he was...well...he was the best detective the police ever had, according to Daichi-san. But now it’s me, and I don’t think he's so good at what he does anyway!” Atsumu continued in a mumble, looking down on the table.
They haven't touched their meals yet and right at that moment he didn't feel like too. Thinking of the past was painful, twisted his stomach, made him feel sick and upset. Well...couldn't be helped. He would never forgive that asshole for what he had done!
“He was kicked out because of an accident four years ago," Atsumu went on quieter now, trying to calm down and somehow got lost in the images in front of his eyes, his memories replayed.
"He had an assistant, a partner...Nakamura Heiji. During a case, Oikawa involved him too, although the police was totally against it. But you know him, he never follows the rules. Because of his recklessness, Nakamura died. The criminal we were chasing was suspected of his death, but some of the proofs also led to Oikawa."
"And...the criminal?" Iwaizumi asked with a hoarse voice, trying to understand what Atsumu was saying.
"We didn't catch him. He disappeared. That criminal is one of the most dangerous ones we know."
The forensic doctor lowered his gaze. Could it be that that was the same one who caused them the problems back then, when his whole team had almost been wiped out? Of course, the police hadn't given them further information, as it was not necessary and they hadn't had to be involved more in that case.
"Tsk...that asshole involved an innocent. Nakamuara died because of his recklessness!" Atsumu's voice snapped Iwaizumi back into reality, "Maybe he even killed him himself, who knows!" his fist banged on the table's surface once, clenching so much that the white of his knuckles was to be seen.
"After that, Oikawa was kicked out by the police. We haven't heard of him for a whole year. And then he came back, working as a private detective and due to Daichi-san's trust into him as a colleague and professional, he often calls him when we can't solve difficult cases.”
That left Iwaizumi speechless for the first time in forever.
Heiji... this was the name Oikawa had spoken of, hallucinating after he had been beaten up by Seokjin's buddies. Now it only made sense, but Iwaizumi's heart dropped to the ground in an instant.
Why Oikawa left, why he had been so terrified. Why he seemed...so lost.
Swallowing, the forensic doctor looked down at his plate.
“He surely regrets it...believe me, even now...” was the first thing Iwaizumi was able to say.
No surprise, that Oikawa had looked at him with so much empathy that night, when he had been drunk. Or that Oikawa had been so upset in the hospital. And also...that he... He bit his bottom lip. Iwaizumi inhaled and looked up.
“I mean...I see there is a reason for you being annoyed by him.”
Clearing his throat, he tried to focus on Atsumu again, leaving the Oikawa topic aside as it wouldn't lead to anything good there. It was too much pain. The other male didn't say anything, but he could see the confusion and concern in Iwaizumi's eyes.
“So that’s why you’re not working with him anymore. Um...you said, you’re the modern and technical guy...I guess you’re familiar with forensics by yourself pretty well?”
“Yes...when I have the chance, I get to do some analysis on my own, I’m pretty practical” Atsumu put on his smile again.
“And I noticed that you’re very fond of your work too?”
They started to dig in, and it helped both to calm down again, chatting about their work and interests.
*
Kicking a small stone in front of him while walking down the street, his fluffy hair waggled in the wind.
Sighing, Oikawa looked around with tired eyes, eyebags as deep as ever. He didn't sleep at all since he left the hospital and his injuries hurt more than he thought they would. But he couldn't help it.
His aversion of hospitals was just too big. It was even a struggle for him, visiting the basement where Kuroo worked.
And moreover, his mind couldn't stop overthinking, fearing that in the morning he'd have to face Iwaizumi again.
So he had ditched his hospital stay, just wandering through the city, not sure about what to do. He'd instinctively gone to Iwaizumi’s favourite spot, admiring the stars and the whole city from that height. He had looked down on it and even imagined for a brief moment what the forensic doctor would have done during that time. Was he sleeping? Working?
And Oikawa hadn't felt hungry or any other need, but now...he was quite hungry. Of course, he was heading for Osamu’s.
His comfort place, even though he might not be so welcomed. Oikawa knew that for most people he was annoying and somehow he just continued to give them that impression of him. That time, he couldn't act like that: his superficial injuries would speak for himself and as he was still wearing the tuxedo he looked more like a businessman with a hangover, gotten into some kind of fight.
So, please, don't let Samu ask questions!
When he arrived at the little restaurant, opening the door, his eyes caught a familiar figure right in front of him, on the other end of the corridor, straight ahead.
No...not one...two.
Oikawa's eyes widened in shock, in disbelief, not being sure if he could trust his eyes anymore.
Iwa-chan was sitting there and...Miya Atsumu was sitting with him. Chatting. Exchanging smiles. Laughing.
What the hell is he doing with him...?!
He didn't know why he was so upset but, clenching his fists, he turned around on his heels before he could walk in any further, letting the door fall closed and walked away as fast as he could. Angry. Shocked.
His heart was racing. His pulse too. His blood was boiling in his veins, pulsing against his temples. He felt the heat coming up to his face. He felt the stabbing inside his heart.
Atsumu was already enough to irritate him, but the fact that...he was smiling and smirking at Iwaizumi...no. No, it was not his business, after all. He had said so.
He wanted Iwaizumi to be happy. But why on earth did he have to have lunch with that jerk? Or maybe it was not like that?
Oikawa’s legs led him to the place they were so used to go when he was like this, feeling devasted, disappointed and sad at the same time without even noticing that he was. Searching for a shelter. Searching for help.
He arrived at the cemetery.
He crossed the main path, turning right, passing by a lot of gravestones, not looking at them at all. Like being in a trance state of mind, Oikawa took step by step and finally, he stood in front of another gravestone.
Coming to a halt, he sighed, and turned around. Bending down, he didn't even hesitate to sit down next to it, wrapping his arms around his knees.
“What are you doing here, Tooru?” someone said, coming closer and leaning on the stone.
Oikawa had to smile as he knew exactly who it was. He lifted his eyes, looking up to the figure that was staring down at him in disapproval.
“I haven’t visited you for a long time now, I thought it would be nice” Oikawa replied, trying to chuckle, keeping his gaze low.
“Don’t mess with me, you visit me almost everyday!” the other man replied, lifting his eyebrows.
“Is it so?”
“Tooru, why are you sad?” Heiji asked, looking at the detective with concern.
He wasn't blaming him. He never did. But he wanted to hear a reason, getting him back on track.
“I’m not...sad” Oikawa replied back, but tears already escaped his eyes.
“Sure, then why are you crying?”
The detective wiped his tears away with the sleeve of his coat, looking at his feet and frowning with stubborness.
“I’m not.”
“Tooru...”
“Why do you have to call me like that?! Stop that!” Oikawa suddenly yelled, upset, getting to his feet again with a jump. He hated it, if someone used that tone. The one that told him he had been seen through.
“Stop...everything! Stop being dead! I can’t...I can't handle this anymore...”
Why did it hurt so much? Why was his whole body shaking? Even after years. Even now.
“You have to stop. Stop blaming yourself. Stop shutting others out of your life. Stop being alone” Heiji claimed, looking at him seriously but gently, as he knew too well Oikawa's insecurities.
The guilt, loaded on his shoulders. The pain, he never allowed to ignore.
“Don’t tell me-" Oikawa began, but the other male interrupted him.
“What to do. I know. You don’t listen to anyone!” he completed the detective's sentence with a tiny smirk, “But just listen to what I’ve said to you. Just this once.”
Oikawa shook his head slightly, and then he blinked...he was alone again.
*
"Hm, thought so. Guess, having you in the morgue as a colleague would be really interesting. Maybe, we would get new records in full autopsy. Are you good at writing reports too?"
“I can do whatever you ask me. I’d love to be your assistant, even if I wanted it to be the other way round at first” Atsumu said while chuckling and was totally unaware that they had just been seen by the disappeared detective before.
"Well, yeah. It’s not only work. It’s...just my life" the forensic doctor replied with a shrug. He knew how strange that sounded.
"Don’t misunderstand! I have hobbies too. Gymming, sometimes cooking. But I really don’t care about having an hour of overwork, work at night etc. You know..."
As it was only natural, working at unreasonable hours, standing at a crime scene or next to a stretcher for hours, analysing, making conclusions. He paused, looking out of the window...right after Oikawa had walked away.
A strange feeling in his stomach.
"So...what about you in private? Hobbies, interests...you have a twin brother and a good taste in sunglasses, that's all I know."
His opposite laughed lightly and he ran a hand through his hair, which caused a little tingling in Iwaizumi's body.
“Actually, I love boxing when I’m stressed or can’t solve a case. And I like going for a run outside” Atsumu listed his interests.
"Well...going for a run, I can clearly see your point."
Nodding, the blonde detective looked to his brother, and he leant in, holding a hand to his mouth.
“But hey, I’m the cooler twin!" although he was whispering, Osamu heard him anyway.
“You’re lame, that’s what you are!”
“Shut yer crap!” Tsumu yelled.
Looking from one to the other, Iwaizumi had to suppress a little smirk. They weren't so different after all, that was for sure.
However, they had finished the meal, so Atsumu was eager to know if he passed the test or not. Requesting an answer, the forensic doctor lifted his eyebrows.
Actually...he liked it. How direct he was, reaching for his goal, being ambitious. But he crossed his arms in front of his chest, trying to look as unaffected as possible.
Holding the pause for a long, long moment, causing Atsumu a little bit anxiousness.
"Osamu-san, coffee please" Iwaizumi finally revealed his decision and gave a little smile to the other.
Atsumu’s eyes lit up, as he smiled widely at the shorter male now, proud that he made it.
"So...boxing. Take me with you someday. I haven’t seen any boxing clubs since my studies. We had one in the university and I was with a fellow student therefrom time to time, but never got myself really involved“ Iwaizumi suggested boldly now, and it was clearly an offer that they should meet in private. A chance for a meet-up.
And more than willed, Atsumu would convince Iwaizumi to be more than just a colleague or boxing mate.
“Sure! We can go tomorrow!”
“Okay” Iwaizumi nodded, before he could think more of it.
Before he could overthink, asking himself if it was okay or not going with Atsumu...well...on a date?
Osamu brought the coffee and Hajime exhaled, trying to get himself focused once more.
“So here’s the plan for you: I'm not married nor in a relationship. And...I think you’re quite interesting, as a person.” he clarified for Atsumu, shrugging lightly, returning the smile with his softer one, “Give me a time and a place, I’ll be there.”
“I thought you were straight though” Atsumu smirked, still not believing that he really got a chance.
“Changed my mind, you don't seem to be an asshole all the time" it wasn't the best explanation, but Iwaizumi couldn't explain it to him in a better way.
He still didn't have thought it through too...still asking himself who he was, who he loved...if he was able to love. That kind of stuff.
Going a step further, maybe taking two at a time now, was more than a forced progress, but he needed that. If he want to proceed, to overcome his trauma, he needed that.
“So tomorrow at 4 pm, in front of the gym. Do you know the way?" Atsumu took out his phone and searched for the address on the web, turning it to the forensic doctor so he could look at it.
"Then...we can also have dinner together. Of course, only if you want.”
Iwaizumi nodded again. He knew that he had to get out of his comfort zone if he wanted to change something.
"Okay, I’ll be there. And as I already know that place, I’m looking forward to your next food recommendation!" he challenged the other with a slight smirk.
“Oh, challenging me now? You’ll lose though!”
"Maybe in boxing, but I don’t think that’s something to lose to. Or better: it will be a delicious loss!" Iwaizumi chuckled, standing up then and leaving with Atsumu after the latter had payed.
Standing outside, Atsumu tilted his head to the other.
“So...wanna take a walk, or...?"
Iwaizumi put his hands in his pockets, “Thanks for the invitation, but I have to go back to work now...with a little roundabout. Just clearing the head and stuff.”
He looked up to him, smiling.
“Miya-san, it was quite interesting to meet you today. I’m looking forward to...our date tomorrow” he said it with light red cheeks, as it was still unfamiliar to him. As it would be a first real date with a man, but he meant it.
“The pleasure is all mine" the detective nodded, his lips curling up to a little smile as it was actually cute how Iwaizumi behaved around him. Insecure, but... cute.
"Maybe...can I call you Hajime-kun?” he asked straightforwardly as usual, and liked it right away, how Iwaizumi's first name slipped his tongue so easily.
Iwaizumi blinked, looking at him for a moment.
Hajime-kun...?
He didn't want to sound rude...and they seemed to be on good terms with each other, but...
“Try it tomorrow, Miya-san and see how I react.”
He waved at him with a grin, as they were about to part from there, taking different directions. It wasn't a refusal nor an agreement, something had stopped him. Something which didn't want to have him called like that. Not by everyone.
As Iwaizumi walked on, looking straight ahead, his face started to show some concern.
It's not so easy to get out of a comfort zone or to change...
Sighing, he took a look at his wrist watch: there was still some time left. He made his way to his favourite spot, walking the side way, turning right and going upstairs. Every single step was letting fragments of the drunken evening to play in his mind. If he had been sober...would he have still poured his heart out?
Holding the scarf close to his neck when some breeze caught him, he noticed that Oikawa's scent was almost gone... With a heavier heart than before, he reached the spot.
Iwaizumi felt the fresh wind which blowed, looking at the city with the clouds above it.
Strange. The forensic doctor's eyes wandered off.
Maybe it’s just like this? I’ll never see him again? He was serious about not dragging me into something again...and the best would be not crossing my line anymore.
Moving his hands to the inside of his pockets, he felt the cold metal of the ring. Taking it out, he looked at it.
“Stupid Oikawa...he surely has got this from some flea market or so and have his own already thrown away!” Iwaizumi mumbled, but...no.
That didn't make him feel upset. Yeah, he was upset. Now even more. But most of all, it made him sad.
First, because it meant he'd never have the chance to scold the other for his shitty behaviour, giving him a smack on the head and offering him the chance to open up.
Second, because Oikawa was not okay.
Nobody would have been fine, having such a trauma and then almost a déjà-vu last night.
Even if Iwaizumi only had basic lectures in psychology...Oikawa was so damn not okay. And he wanted to do something. He wanted to help him.
Why do you care so much about him?
Admiration...?
Maybe.
With a long sigh, he sat down on the bench, just breathing and watching the city as the afternoon sun took its journey from the sky to the horizon.
For the second time, he had the feeling that he missed something.
Someone.
Notes:
Thank you to everyone who has left comments, kudos, bookmarks, or even just read this. Thank you so much. It means a lot to us! <3
Chapter 9: First date
Chapter Text
“Hey Iwaizumi! How did that autopsy go yesterday? I heard some strange pompous detective was asking about it?" Iwaizumi was greeted by Kuroo, who passed by on the corridor when the forensic doctor was about going to the labratory. "Unfortunately, I had some researches to do and couldn’t watch the show!” the chemist chuckled.
Stopping, Iwaizumi rubbed his neck and put his lips into a thin line.
“Well...something between smacking heads and kicking his ass” Iwaizumi replied honestly, shoving the files together under his other arm because he just came out of an important discussion with one of the officers.
He looked up, scanned Kuroo almost a bit...how much could he tell? He slowly proceeded,
“He invited me to lunch and I gave him a 20-minutes-chance to make me change my mind on his sunny-asshole behaviour.”
Biting his bottom lip, it was proof that it wasn't all, and then Kuroo gave an “aaaand?”. Iwaizumi tilted his head to the side.
“He...is quite interesting, I think. As a person and professional I mean. I suggested that we'll meet today in private.”
However, he didn't sound too enthusiastic. It brought Kuroo's eyebrows up, as the other should have sounded much happier, right? But he couldn't know that Iwaizumi was caught by a long and exhausting dream in the night.
That kind of dream that made you feel even more tired after waking up. Mixing up all kind of things.
To keep it short, in the dream Iwaizumi had been exposed to his his colleagues and friends, being judged for meeting with a man like Atsumu, settling his hopes high although he knew the circumstances. Then there was Oikawa...Oikawa, who stood in front of him, disappointed of him and asking how he could be friends with his enemy. Of course, the last was just overdramatised like the detective could be, but...Iwaizumi wasn't sure anymore, whether he was right or wrong. And especially after the Yui-incident, he had become even more insecure.
Still, Kuroo wasn't dumb and understood perfectly well how torn Iwaizumi might feel.
So he grabbed him by the shoulder in a friendly manner.
“You deserve this, okay? Don’t think about others, just enjoy it to the fullest!” he advised him with a sincere smile. Then, curiosity took the lead.
“So may I know who is the detective who is honoured to go to a date with the unattainable Iwaizumi?”
Slightly shocked Iwaizumi gulped, nodding as a student would in front of his teacher, and answered quietly.
“Miya Atsumu...but I won’t call it a date" he tried to belittle that statement, feeling his cheeks going red, "It’s more like hanging out, having some fun and maybe grabbing dinner afterwards.”
This sounded like a date.
Kuroo's eyebrows lifted more in amusement.
“Okay, okay! It's a date!” Iwaizumi admitted, now really wearing a light blush on his face, looking aside in embarrassment, “I’m just...not sure about it. I mean...dating is nothing I’m so unfamiliar with. But...with a man, I am” he got even quieter.
So it’s Atsumu, uh...
“It's the same, really” Kuroo reassured him, “Plus, you hanged out with Oikawa sometimes, so...it won’t be different this time too, right? It'll be just a little more...romantic?” he winked at the forensic doctor with a crinkled furrow in encouragement,
"Okay, I have to go now, else I'll be the one getting his ass kicked!" laughing, he clapped Iwaizumi's shoulder, who chuckled a bit.
More romantic?
It didn't help him to know he'd already hung out with the other detective. Yeah, he had but...
Shaking his head, Iwaizumi sighed and went into his laboratory, where he saw Akane smiling brightly.
“Morning” he greeted her, “Report done?”
She nodded in excitement and jumped up from her seat. With dancing steps, she handed him the paper.
“It's been tough, but I hope it’s okay now.”
“I’ll correct it until Thursday, okay?" Iwaizumi flipped through the sheets. Neatly done, definitely.
"So...wanna start with a new lesson?”
The young woman gave a happy yes as a reply, and so time started to run fast. Teaching her some techniques for the toracic autopsy part, telling her the right order of handling it and also asking a lot of questions about the procedure and anatomical structures. Then he looked up again at the big clock, it was already 2pm.
“Okay, enough for today. Get some lunch. Akaashi will come in in an hour, he has some tasks for you” Iwaizumi announced and stood up from his chair, closing the folder he had written in and handed it to her.
“Are you already leaving?” she wondered and turned around on the swivel chair, as her mentor seemed to be in rush, walking over to the wardrobe hook with large steps.
“Yeah, I have an appointment.”
This answer made the sassy woman grin, and she rested her chin in both of her hands.
“Ooh...tell me about it!”
“No, nothing for your young ears to hear. Stay focused on work!” he didn't even make a grimace and just shot her a stern look.
“How mean!”
But there he went, leaving the labratory and making his way home fast, just to have a quick shower and packing a bag with the important stuff he knew were necessary in a gym. It really had been a while since he had gone to one. In the past, Iwaizumi had his balance there, doing his workouts, but recently his schedule became too busy and so he just skipped it.
A little smirk of anticipation appeared on his lips, as he checked his phone for the gym's address. Soon, Iwaizumi was on his way to the place where he would have met with Atsumu.
*
The detective was dressed in a cool tight bluejeans and a form-fitting shirt. He was wearing his leather jacket as it was a bit windy, but he just felt heat crawling up from his feet. Exhaling noisely for the third time in a minute, he was shifting from left to right and back, waiting for Iwaizumi Hajime outside the gym, and...he was a bit nervous.
He. The sassy, arrogant and confident Miya Atsumu was nervous.
He was playing with his fingers, clenching his fist and releasing it again. He had even reluctanctly asked his brother for some tips, and-
Atsumu gulped as he saw Iwaizumi coming around the corner and walking up to him. He was smiling.
Gosh...that...damn, hot...smile.
And Atsumu wasn't the only one who dressed up there: going for slim black pants, Iwaizumi had chosen a woolen pullover, presenting his pectorals too well, which were usually hidden under the labratory coat. His jacket was unzipped, as it was warmer than other days and he wasn't wearing Oikawa's beige scarf that always looked like it didn't belong to him.
“Hey” Atsumu said, hesitating a bit on how to call the forensic doctor, “You look nice, Iwaizumi-kun.”
But if he thought he was the only one feeling like that, he was totally wrong.
Iwaizumi’s heartbeat went up as he saw the handsome man standing in front of the gym and it costed him some mental skill to stay calm and collected, answering all cool: “Same goes for you.”
Lifting his eyebrows, he had noticed the change of adressing: so it wasn't Hajime-kun, uh?
“You’re going for the polite way?”
“I just...felt like it was upsetting you,” he shrugged, "So...wanna go inside?"
They entered the gym, and went straight to the changing rooms. As Atsumu was a regular customer, it wasn't a problem to identify Iwaizumi as a 'guest' for that day.
Putting his bag on the bench in the middle, the forensic doctor looked around. It was pretty modern, very clean and there wasn't even the smell of sweat inside the room.
His eyes wandered to Atsumu, who already had began to undo his bottoned-up shirt, but he quickly glanced away.
Fuck...he was really hot. Too hot.
Changing into their sports clothes, they went inside the sports room. The sound of squeaking trainers and the stressed exhales of sportsmen reached his ear.
Atsumu advised to warm up and, stretching and getting ready. They funnily didn't look at each other at all during the warm up. They both had the same feeling of being attracted to each other.
The detective clearly had a hard time. Iwaizumi was showing his calves in his shorts, and he was wearing a tank top that defined his upper body muscles but also showed off his biceps and triceps.
Does he even know how much sex-appeal he has?
Gulping, Atsumu tried to sound confident.
“Are you sure you wanna fight me here?”
They got into the boxing ring.
“I’m more than sure. Losing would be an honour though, as you surely are skilled and more trained than I am right now. But don’t go easy on me” Iwaizumi shrugged back with an amused smirk.
No, it was a flirty one. Not on purpose, but it just slipped out of him.
He glanced over, as Atsumu was about to stretch his arms a little bit more in front of him, and he looked at that well built muscular back, because the detective turned around for a moment. Covered by a tight shirt, it also revealed some nice triceps and...that neck and legs...
Congratulations, Hajime. You feel totally attracted to him!
It was a first for him, falling like that for a man. A first to have a date with one. And a first being hit on by one.
When Atsumu turned around with that triumphant grin on his face, Iwaizumi tried to keep up his own too.
Breathing, he tried to concentrate. It really had been a while and he needed to get used to the feeling, to dodging and attacking all over again. They started slowly, but then the fight lit up.
Atsumu was a lot more capable than Iwaizumi, but soon the latter managed to find his balance and his eyes observed quickly and with accuracy his opponent's movements. Still, he felt that he would lose eventually.
However, there was suddenly a slight chance, one of the rare opportunities when your opponent loses his focus.
“Got you!” and brought him to fall.
With that, and a little bit of luck, he made Atsumu fall on the ground, but the other guy entangled their legs and made Iwaizumi fall with him.
Sitting up, Iwaizumi took a long breath and opened his eyes again. Supporting himself on the ground of the boxing ring with his hands, he glanced down and right into Atsumu's eyes, who was totally infatuated by the the other's olive-green ones.
They were inches away from each other. None of them said anything, staring at each other for a time that seemed like eternity.
Iwaizumi felt his heart stop for a moment, beating out of rhythm again.
Breathing heavily because of the exercise, he just couldn't say a word. The heat between their bodies led to slight dizziness, and the shorter male lost himself for a proper moment.
"Nice hit combination before" he murmured, his voice too hoarse to sound normal at all.
Atsumu looked at him and tried to hold back. Tried to hold back from pulling Iwaizumi close by his top's collar and kissing him. For God’s sake, he was way too beautiful, too handsome and hot, and the detective felt that there was some chemistry between them, which made the air heavy and dry. But he held back for the sake of a relationship that they might have just begun. After all, they knew each other for only one day.
“You...lied to me. You’re actually more than good...at this” Atsumu stated, his voice a bit lower than it normally was.
It gave Iwaizumi chills he couldn't even explain. But yeah...he liked it. He liked this lower tone, how he looked him into the eyes, in a way that Iwaizumi felt...wanted. Something, he hadn't felt for a long time.
"I didn’t lie. I just didn’t know."
The detective's fingers tried to stay laying flat on the ground, not letting them wander to Iwaizumi's hands or legs too. Damn, it was so difficult not to give in.
Finally, Iwaizumi stood up again, holding out his hand, so he could pull Atsumu back to his feet.
"You can have your revenge, if you insist?" the forensic doctor smirked and cracked his cervical area a bit.
He clearly got on fire, not only because of the sudden closeness they had experienced, but also because he felt the excitement in his bones. Iwaizumi was really enjoying the challenge.
“I won’t give up now!” Atsumu laughed and their second round began.
Unfortunately, Iwaizumi's date wasn't able to focus again. The only thing he could think of was Iwaizumi’s eyes, how they looked at him, how they...actually wanted him, or maybe it was just his imagination? He couldn't know. There was actually one thing Atsumu couldn't solve with his technological method. Unbelievable! But it made the other man much more interesting to him.
It was a good fight, they didn't spare each other, and after a while they called it an end. They were sweating as hell, feeling exhausted. It was a good exhaustion, which caused endorphines.
Not to forget that Iwaizumi really had fun while watching Atsumu, his motions, his features. His eyes...fascinating, somehow. The detective was so full of determination and ambition that Hajime wanted so see more.
Getting back to the changing room, they showered and dressed back. They were ready to go and get some dinner, when Iwaizumi's phone began to ring. Both men looked at the device on the bench, but then the forensic doctor's face got serious. Atsumu knew it had to be something about his work.
“Daichi-san?”
"Iwaizumi-san! We need you for an autopsy right now! Actually, you have to come to the murder scene, so you can analyze it better. I’ll send you the address!”
Daichi didn't even give him the chance to inhale for a second, but got straight to the point. He didn't even expect a reply from the forensic doctor. He hung up, just like that.
"Well that's a fast end for a date" detective Miya murmured with lifted eyebrows, looking up.
"I’m...I’m really sorry, Atsumu-san, I guess...dinner will have to wait?" Iwaizumi smiled apologetically, almost sighing.
That was it: dating a high-skilled forensic doctor...wasn't that simple.
I'm married to my work.
He had had that talk with Oikawa before, when the brunette asked him out about Yui.
Atsumu looked at him with understanding.
“If Daichi-san needs the most talented forensic doctor of Tokyo, then it must be a serious case!” he commented, “But it was wonderful...hanging out with you. I’m looking forward to do it again soon, ehm...Hajime-kun...”
They got...closer, right? It was okay to call him like that?
He wasn't wrong with his assumption: it was okay. Iwaizumi's smile became softer, as he felt warmer being called by his first name.
“But this time, I’ll give you a ride. No buts” Atsumu added with a grin and put on his leather jacket.
“Okay...guess this would be the best I could ask for.”
They went outside and he followed Atsumu to his car, a cool metallic blue, sporty one, which suited the detective too well. Getting in, sitting down on the passenger seat, Iwaizumi ran a hand through his short hair.
“So next time...my treat as an apology?” he glanced over.
“Sure, I’d love that” Atsumu agreed with a bright smile, starting the engine.
He felt that he really gained a chance to win the doctor's heart. That he had been invited in, at least for peeking in.
It was more than he could have asked for...and he didn't want to let that chance be wasted.
*
Oikawa entered the hospital. Neither did he know why, nor did he know how. His legs seemed to have decided for themselves that he wanted to go there, although his mind didn't. Strange, how body and mind sometimes worked so...different.
Heading directly to Kuroo's office, he hesitated for a moment, then he knocked.
It was unfamiliar for him to do so, and it caused Kuroo to look up and lift his eyebrows and...
He jumped up, almost throwing things from his desk because he was so overwhelmed by the detective's apperance, and he ran towards him, embracing him in a tight hug.
“Oikawa!”
“Now now, what’s with all this affection?” Oikawa teased, being hugged like that and chuckling a bit.
“You moron! You know pretty well that I’m worried about you all the time, especially since you left the hospital in those conditions...!” Kuroo interrupted himself, straightening up again.
“Yeah yeah, whatever” Oikawa shrugged when he was released and sat down on one of Kuroo’s office chairs, followed by his friend.
“Where have you been?!” the chemist asked, still in disbelief that he was back.
“Well...just wandering around the city. Aimlessly” Oikawa replied honestly, and glared at his friend’s desk, at the tools, the papers.
“Huh? You know, Iwaizumi was worried for you!” Kuroo snapped, getting upset and crossing his arms.
“Is it so? I’m not so sure...” Oikawa smiled faintly.
Iwa-chan? Worried? No...not after...
Kuroo already wanted to snap back once more, but when he saw his friend's smile... something was wrong.
"What do you mean?" he asked quietly, "What...is it that makes you think like that?"
“It doesn’t matter now, life goes on, right?” Oikawa avoided the question and continued with his smiling.
If he didn't want to talk about something, there was no way he could be convinced. Stubborn as hell.
However they couldn't argue any further, because he suddenly received a call from Daichi. Taking out his phone, Oikawa stood up, taking a few steps and picked up right away, making Kuroo sigh.
"Stubborn idiot..."
They talked for one or two minutes. Hanging up, the detective turned on his heels, already about to leave, rushing out as he had rushed in before.
“Oikawa” Kuroo held him back on his shoulder, "I’ve never asked for anything. But I do now."
He looked him in the eyes, sincerely.
"Do me one favour: follow the same advices you give to other people. If you have something you care about, then put more effort in it. Life goes on...also for you."
He let go, sighing.
"And come by with some sweets next time, so I won’t have a low level of insuline because of the stress you cause me!" he smiled wryly.
Oikawa looked at his friend and exhaled with a little smile in return. He had always been so caring.
“Yeah, sure.”
But before he left, standing in the doorframe, he turned his head over his shoulder once more, "Uh...is...Iwa-chan here? I don’t want to...well...”
Kuroo looked at him, glanced to the ceiling and decided to go for a general answer, not for the real reason.
Iwaizumi's private life wasn't his business.
“You missed him. He went home around two or three hours ago.”
Oikawa nodded and then left the hospital to go to the crime scene area Daichi had told him about.
More to the outer area of the city, near a river, a lot of police cars, blue lights and of course also an ambulance were already assembled.
He looked around, recognising Akaashi and Akane, the latter jumping literally on him as soon as she saw him.
“Oikawa-san! Long time no see!”
Oikawa only smiled at her and also greeted Akaashi.
“Oikawa!”
“This is a rough one, isn’t it?” the detective already knew that it was the police officer in charge of the case himself approaching the little group. They greeted each other, but Daichi wasn't in the mood to give a smirk in return.
“It is, or else I wouldn’t have called you.”
“Rude!”
So it was damn serious.
*
The ride didn't take long, maybe fifteen minutes, until they got to the crime scene. Police cars all around, blue sirens.
“Well...thanks for the ride” Iwaizumi said with a long inhale, looking at Atsumu, not so sure about how to end this. How to end their date. Looking at him, he just had to chuckle a bit. He was feeling embarrassed.
“Sorry” the forensic doctor added, “I’m really not used to going on dates anymore...I just don't know how to end it properly without making it awkward for one of us”
It was true. Somehow...yes, somehow he felt attracted to him. That was die sure.
But that was also the reason why it made all so difficult. Iwaizumi sensed that spark which just needed to be lit, but that was too fast? And a cool bye was just too distant.
The detective chuckled quietly on the other's try to hide his embarassment, but then leant in, reaching with his hand for the other's on his leg, touching it gently.
Leaning in, getting closer to Iwaizumi's face and looking him into the eyes, his lips brushed softly Iwaizumi's cheek, leaving a light but sweet kiss. Seconds, until his lips left the rougher skin of that incredible man next to him.
It surely would have been too straightforward for anyone else, but there, it was just right for them. At that moment, feeling the electric atmosphere between them.
It felt good. It felt nice.
“Thank you, Hajime-kun” Atsumu muttered with an honest smile and kept looking at him with those brown eyes of his.
Being just a loss for words...Iwaizumi smiled too, hesitating at first.
Then, he gathered up courage and returned the kiss with one of his own. Just right next on the corner of Atsumu’s lips, maybe even touching them. His skin started tingling in an instant, his heart skipped a few beats although he was the one kissing the other male.
"You’re welcome" Iwaizumi whispered, then getting out of the car before they could get too attached to the situation and maybe doing something else which wasn't meant to be done right now.
He left back a quiet and somehow shocked detective, who stared at an invisible spot in front of him, trying to realise that Iwaizumi had actually kissed him. Really kissed him. Softly. Just lightly. But...he had felt his lips. And how is own had started to burn out in anticipation.
It was for the better, that Iwaizumi had left right after. Atsumu wouldn't have guaranteed anything from that point on...he would have been unable to guarantee that he wouldn't have pulled the forensic doctor back to him, starting a real kissing session. Tasting more of those warm lips.
His head sunk against the steering wheel.
Shit...he had totally fallen for him.
Notes:
Thank you again for everything! For appreciating this fic, for commetning, leaving kudos...everything!
This chapter was shorter tha the previous one, but we're trying to crop everything in the exact points.
We think this story will have around 20 chapters or so :3
Chapter 10: The forensic doctor who cares
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
While approaching the crime scene, Iwaizumi exhaled deeply, trying to get his crap together and stop smiling like an idiot. It was a damn crime scene with a damn murder!
He had to get back to his professional self.
"We waited with the investigations, until the detective and the forensic doctor in charge would arrive" Akaashi explained to him politely, tlling him why they hadn't started yet.
"Good, because I don’t want to miss a detail here if Daichi-san calls this an emergency autopsy."
But before he could go on, a well-known voice came from behind, making him shiver for a moment.
Not fair.
That was...not fair.
There he was, standing there in his beige coat as if nothing had happened.
The feelings Iwaizumi had buried deep inside for the last days began to form into a storm.
Why was he messing with him again?
The day had gone so smoothly, so good. He really gave it a chance. The date. Even almost having kissed Atsumu. Things were about to change. But now...
Swallowing, Iwaizumi didn't know what he should do first with Oikawa. Punching him? Scolding him? Or just...holding him?
No, not the last one!
Despite all those things...Iwaizumi only turned his head over his shoulder, glaring at the figure behind him, glaring at Oikawa as if staring at a ghost.
His mind went blank. He wanted to insult him, to tell him what the hell was wrong with him, all of that...but he couldn't. And therefore, he eventually blinked away. Clenching his fists by his side, he tried to calm himself.
"Daichi-san...tell us about the case."
Damn...his voice cracked, clearly to be heard.
Oikawa sensed the uncomfortableness and tension between them, but he also decided not to say anything. He didn't do anything. He just looked at Daichi as Iwaizumi did. He wanted to know everything about that case. Everything, except...
“This time...it's a woman. She died after lunch, she ate with some friends. We already asked all of them, and nobody seem to be able to explain why she died, since they all ate and drank the same things” Daichi explained, and that made Oikawa frown.
“This is a normal case of poisoning, you have solved this plenty of times, why did you call me?” the detective said impatiently, putting his hands on his pockets and sounding somehow...off.
“It’s because the victim was already dead” Daichi declared, and Oikawa widened his eyes, staring at the policeman with curiousity and lack of understanding.
He approached the dead body with serious eyes, bending down and starting his observations accurately. It needed only seconds for him to make his conclusions.
Iwaizumi stood next to him, arms crossed, but instead of looking at the dead woman, his eyes kept staring at Oikawa, as if he was a ghost. Gulping, he then forced himself to get back to the professional doctor he was.
“Akaashi, start with the victim herself, maybe we'll find injection sites. Akane, you go for the surrounding. Look especially for food supplies, leftovers. Put everything in bags and bring it in for the analysis. We need to know what kind of poison she swallowed” he delegated the tasks and then bent down to the victim, as Oikawa was already working his way there.
“So...dead before murder, huh?”
Iwaizumi noticed that her lips and fingertips were purpler than usual.
“We can only make assumptions until we have the results, but it seems she was poisoned before she was poisoned” he said quietly, with the detective next to him.
“Actually,” Daichi began, “she was supposed to be dead already, because she died four years ago.”
"What? So...she died because she shouldn't have been alive...” murmuring, Iwaizumi examined the neck carefully, “No signs of strangling or any other weapons...no violence to be found at the first sight.” Looking at her legs, he noticed some dysbalance in the length, but that could have been physiological anyway.
Oikawa didn't seem to be surprised at all, he didn't make any expression as he got closer to the victim's mouth, sniffling.
“Bitter almonds” the detective interrupted the little talk and straightened up.
“That means...” Daichi began, and his sentence was finished before he could do that himself.
“Cyanide, yes. But I don’t think it’s the only cause of her death.”
As Oikawa seemed so perplex, Iwaizumi looked up.
“What do you mean?”
“Look at her. She died from brain anoxia due to cyanide poisoning, but it’s strange that she also had carotid stenosis” Oikawa pointed out to the side of the neck, right where the carotid was to be felt.
Iwaizumi blinked. He took out glasses from the inside of his jacket, the ones for enlargement and not usual glasses that one would wear, and put them on.
Reaching forward, he touched the structure, pressing it lightly...he was right. The carotid felt way too thick and hard than it should be. He then compared both sides.
“Clearly only on the left side" he stated in agreement.
“This isn't due to cyanide...this must be something else” Oikawa murmured, not even looking at the forensic doctor, as if he was only speaking to himself. Maybe he was. It was hard to tell what was going on inside the detective's mind.
“I knew I could count on you” Daichi commented with a wry smile and somehow also relieved, because it meant they made a little progress.
Oikawa's excellent deduction skills were never disappointing.
“Anything else known from her? The people she had dinner with...I need her medical history. Drugs, illnesses, everything.”
The police officer nodded and explained that she was still to be identified as she hadn't got an IC with her. For now, Iwaizumi had to accept that. So he turned to Oikawa again, although it was hard to suppress the urge to ask the brunette other, much more personal, questions. He literally bit his tongue to not let it slip.
“Do you go for a precipitated stroke or...is there anything else in mind you want me to especially take care of?”
“There must have been an ictus, but I want to know the cause of her carotid stenosis first” Oikawa replied coldly, getting up from the ground, and turning around to the police officer.
“I’ll be in the labratory. If you have news, call me. There's nothing I can do here for now. Oh, and I need everyone’s alibi and version of the story” Oikawa added, before he was about to leave.
Okay...that clearly...that did piss him off.
“Please, bring the body to the morgue, I’ll be there and start the examination. My colleagues will collect the proofs here!” the forensic doctor ordered to one of the officers nearby quickly, and then jumped up, following Oikawa a few meters ahead.
That's it for him? Not a single word? Such a-!
“Nice to see you! How have you been?! I’m sorry I’m just being that kind of fleeing detective!” Iwaizumi spilled his anger out as soon as they were out of reach for the others to hear, stating that he would've liked to hear: “At least a hello?”
The last sentence came out much calmer and the shorter male sighed quietly.
Oikawa stopped when he heard him speaking, even turned around to face him but...he couldn't look him in the eye. Something stopped him. As if...he was ashamed or scared.
“I’m sorry, I just thought it would upset you” Oikawa replied in the same cold voice.
“What?!”
Damn...is he serious?
Maybe Iwaizumi should feel relieved that it was nothing serious, but he didn't. It just made his anger grow, but the nervouseness, the suppressed fear of never seeing him again came up to him.
“Jesus...no...no, no, no!”
He immediately got closer, reaching for the other's hand with his own. A cautious touch with his fingertips, as if he feared Oikawa would escape right the moment after he dared too much.
“I’m...I was fucking scared...” he whispered the last word, and Iwaizumi's eyes showed nothing more.
The worry of the last days. His more or less sleepless nights because of so many things going on, all needing his attention. But the one thing, the one person, had been just out of sight.
Oikawa's lips formed a thin line and he retracted his hand when he felt the other's touch, lowering his gaze to his feet. He didn't want Iwaizumi to care for him. He didn't want to worry him, as he had to live his life, even if it meant...
“For what?” the detective asked seriously in return, glancing at Iwaizumi's hand that was still in the position he left it.
“Scared...because of you? Because you were seriously injured and then you just disappeared, didn't call, didn't say anything, nor leaving a message?” Iwaizumi's voice trembled, not even sure if Oikawa only asked that rhetorically or meant it, because he really didn't know.
“You took off the ring.”
They stayed in silence for a moment, the forensic doctor was feeling more than awkward now, even guilty. He stiffened and could only reply in the same manner like Oikawa before.
“I thought...I would have offended you with wearing it. Giving you the other back as you wanted me to have both of them, because I don't plan on proposing to anyone, it was...you know...” stammering, his hand reached for the pocket of his jeans, and kept it laying there. He had the ring in it. Damn...why was he feeling so stupid now?
“I think...I crossed a line. I'm sorry, I...”
Obviously...what the hell was he thinking? Keeping one ring and giving back the other like 'I don't accept any other than you'? Accept for what?
They were nothing. Not lovers, not even friends. Colleagues maybe. Nothing more.
He didn't even know what he felt for the detective. He still hadn't figured it out.
“Obviously, the case is closed so you don’t have to wear it, uhm...” Oikawa tried, wanting to repair what he said before at the hospital as he wasn't dumb, that it had hurt the other more than he had imagined. Hurt him with his words and actions. But for the latter he couldn't make up.
“So...it's okay. But I have to go now, I need to make those analysis” he mumbled, starting to walk again.
Instinctively, he raised a hand up to his chest, touching a thin thread, hanging around his neck under the fabric of his shirt: a necklace with the ring. Those rings were the last gift Heiji gave him.
Heiji, who had been deeply in love with Oikawa, but Oikawa hadn't been able to reciprocate his feelings.
For him, Heiji had always been a really good friend. The day he died, he found those two rings in Heiji’s pockets. Even if he had known that Oikawa would have rejected him, Heiji had wanted to propose to him.
That truth had stabbed Oikawa's heart more than once. Every day. Every night.
Oikawa had never wanted to use those rings for anything else than a reminder of the events, of what he had done.
Using those rings for that damn case had taken him a lot of effort. If he hadn't trust Iwaizumi, that idea would've never crossed his mind.
“Damn it, don’t just go away like that!”
He heard the forensic doctor shouting at him, so he even walked faster. But suddenly, there was a tight grip on his back, dragging him backwards. Oikawa stumbled two steps, regaining his balance then, and a second hand clenched there. Holding on to him so tightly...stopping him from disappearing again.
Oikawa's heart skipped a beat, surprised and irritated. What was it with him? What was that sudden behaviour?
“I don’t get you...I don’t get you and it pisses me off!” Iwaizumi declared, suppressing the urge to yell again.
He inhaled deeply, telling himself to stay calm, but his stomach only rumbled more. Unless...he smelled it. That familiar scent. That scent...which really could calm him down.
That scent he...missed.
“You don’t even give someone the chance to understand you" Iwaizumi continued, leaning for a second his forehead against the broad shoulders in front of him, "To...be a support for you. And that makes me so much angrier, because you’re so fucking far from okay. You’re so fucking punishing yourself for something you experienced, something awful...and still you don't want to let anybody help you."
Let me help you.
“What...?!” Oikawa said in disbelief, swallowing hard. The moment of Iwaizum leaning on him was already gone and he whirled around to him, with an angry overwhelmed expression in his brown eyes.
“What the hell do you know about me or what I went through?!” he couldn't do anything else than yelling. Stress and anger that he tried to suppress recently were controlling him now.
His reaction...was as to be expected.
“Nothing from you, because you never talk and you’re just getting angry all over again when I try to get to you!” therefore, Iwaizumi yelled back, “You wanted to hear my trauma so bad? You had the choice not to care at all, but you did! So why is it so hard to accept that I do care for you?”
The forensic doctor's hand was still clenched around the fabric of the coat when Oikawa had turned around. Staring now into his eyes, his desperation took over him, sending a soft spark in his own olive-green irises. Iwaizumi's heart started racing, pounding against his chest so hard that it hurt.
“Fuck it, Oikawa! Yell at me! Shout at me, but at least tell me why you’re so angry, why you're so upset that I don't hurt you again, because I don't want to! I don't want to hurt you, just because I don't know a single thing here. So just do it, and don’t worry, I can be very patient!”
Don’t look at me with those eyes...
“I don’t want your pity, Iwa-chan. And I don’t need someone's help, because nobody can understand me anyway” he stated, freeing himself from Iwaizumi’s grip and sighed, frustrated, “That bastard told you, didn’t he?!”
Iwazumi furrowed his eyebrows, irritated and confused.
Did he see us?
Focusing on their talk he went on.
"Yeah, he did. But I won’t pity you, I’m far from that" he lowered his arm, as Oikawa freed himself, "But I...would show you compassion and a shoulder to lean on from time to time, if you let me..."
Iwaizumi sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets, playing nervously with the ring between his fingers, as he really didn't know how to go on, how to turn the tables. How to make it better. It was like a dead-end road, not being able to return, not being able to break through. And he wanted to break through to him, to convince him that he was worth it. Worth to be cared for, worth to get support. Worth not to be alone.
"I agree with you, we can’t understand each other. And probably we’ll never will. We’re different and that’s a good thing, but...we can try. And as humans, we can feel with others" the shorter male talked quietly now, looking slowly up, watching Oikawa's very features.
So...maybe he should go for the truth. Maybe he should open up too, voluntarily, not being asked for like in the hospital days ago. Inhaling and straightening up, he gave his exhale with a little puff sound.
"I tell you something. You were the first in a very, very long time. The first, despite my mom, who gave me the feeling that you really get the emotions inside of me. Really understand me. And...it was so much more reassuring than any word could be."
Iwaizumi looked at his feet now, biting his lip, "It wasn’t that I asked for it...Miya...he just said, that you two had worked together, and I was surprised and...I didn’t want to dig into your past, Oikawa. Really..."
“And that’s exactly what I hate the most" Oikawa responded with a grim, "That I’ll never find someone who can understand me, because then, that person wouldn't care anymore. See?” Oikawa kept looking at him, hurt. The pain of the past showing in his eyes. A grudge held against...himself.
“You only began to care when you knew about my disastrous past" he gave a wry smile, "I don’t need anybody’s compassion. I don't need yours.”
Stubbornly, he put his hands in the pockets of his coat, “I’m better alone, as I always was and as I'll always be."
Iwaizumi snarled and then, taking a big amount of air inside his mouth he shouted "Idiot!!“ and gritted his teeth.
"You’re such a...stupid idiot! Bakakawa!“
Without further warning, he gave Oikawa a strong smack on his head with his fist, but keeping his hand on the brown fluffy curls, as he pushed him down...getting calm again and releasing his hand. Subconsciously, he carressed the soft hair.
"If that was the case, that I don’t care...I wouldn't have spent time with you so far. I wouldn’t have brought you to a place that's the only place I feel safe. And I wouldn’t have agreed to be your partner for that case."
The forensic doctor lifted his hand again.
"You’ll be alone, because you put yourself in a cage. Still...you want to have someone who understands you?"
Starting walking, he passed the detective with a thoughtful expression.
"I didn’t know anything about what had happened until yesterday. And even if you don’t like to hear it: I was worried. I was scared. I was upset. I still am. But I care for you, so deal with it."
Walking furhter ahead, he added, "I’m in the morgue. I have to do some autopsy, as you know."
Oikawa stared at him in disbelief.
He sighed, staring at his back, but didn't comment on his last words. It was pointless to argue. They had different points of view. You could argue if there was something to argue at all, but not if there was something missing. A piece in the puzzle with the utmost important detail in it, which didn't let you catch the whole picture.
Following the doctor from a certain distance, because after all they had to go to the same place, Oikawa tried to get his focus back while doing so.
*
When they arrived, going to the basement by the staircase, Iwaizumi went right to the morgue, not even looking at him again, while the detective proceeded to Kuroo’s labratory. Not knocking, not announcing himself, just as always, he found his friend sitting there on his chair, staring down some documents.
"How often do I need to tell you to knock, Yaha-"
But then the chemist turned around, and he stared at the detective in surprise.
“What’s that face?" Kuroo asked with lifted eyebrows, suppressing a grin as it had been a while since he had seen him with that kind of expression, "Don't tell me the case is too difficult for you?”
“Yeah...it is” Oikawa admitted for the other's surprise, and caught his attention with that totally.
A case too difficult for Oikawa? No way!
But of course the detective didn't mean the murder, but Iwaizumi’s case. Kuroo stood up, coming closer and leaning on the counter.
“Okay, what’s going on?” he wanted to know now, sounding serious.
As they exchanged looks, he noticed that it might have been Oikawa's intention all the way, talking about it. It was a rare moment. Mocking others, ranting about some idiot or wanting to talk about a case...it was nothing new. But the fact that he was coming there, asking to be listened for anything other...for something private, that was like a first. A first Kuroo really appreciated, as he knew that the detective wasn't the kind of guy to spill out his thoughts, sorrows or problems like that at all. So it might have really nagged him.
Instead of replying, the brunette was asking back.
“Is it so hard, not to care for me?”
The chemist stared at him in surprise, but got immediately what it was about and put on a soft smile.
“You’re such a restless jerk and idiot, it’s impossible not to care for you.”
“I think Iwa-chan is mad at me” Oikawa gritted his teeth.
“Then just apologise?”
“It’s not that simple!”
“It is. You‘ve just always hated simple things, so it's no surprise you can’t understand them!” Kuroo said with a little laughter and caused Oikawa to grumble a bit, blushing, because his friend was so right and he hated it.
“Shut up, and start doing my analysis already!”
*
It had been a strange feeling, Oikawa walking behind him. And as they had arrived at the hospital, Iwaizumi couldn't help it, but heading straight to his examination room. He needed space, needed to be alone, to get a grip.
Clearing his head. But this was something he couldn't do while Oikawa was behind him.
The body had been already brought there by the police and so the forensic doctor started to change into his work coat, getting off anything unnecessary, putting on gloves and a mask and starting with the examination by himself. He went for the superficial observation first, making notes on a lined paper and doing the check list.
Why can’t he just accept it?
No...Kuroo is right.
It’s ridiculous, how much I care.
Why do I even...?
He paused, holding the scalpel in his hand and doing nothing. He got lost in his thoughts, not even blinking.
“Iwaizumi-san”
It took some time, until he realised that someone was calling out to him. He snapped back into reality.
“Iwaizumi-san!”
He shrieked and threw the scalpel away, stumbling against the tool stand.
“Fuck!”
The forensic doctor looked up at Akaashi, who had entered the morgue, and approached without him noticing, five minutes before.
His assistant gulped quietly and when he finally had his attention he tried it again.
“Everything’s alright?!”
“Y-yeah...do you have the things to analyse?” Iwaizumi went for averting the topic and getting back to his job.
Maybe he put on a show there, and he knew that Akaashi wasn't so dumb that he wouldn't notice, but the forensic doctor wasn't in the mood to discuss his problems or whatever made his mind so heavy.
“Yes...” Akaashi lifted his eyebrows.
Iwaizumi clearly was thrown off track. He could try to cover it as much as he wanted but recently...he just wasn't his usual self.
“Then...bring it to Kuroo, I’ll need you for assistance. In the meantime...I try to clear up the tools. And please knock when you enter.”
Akaashi sighed.
He had knocked. Thrice.
But as it was no use now, he walked off with a worried expression and went to Kuroo’s labratory as he was told. Stepping in with a wrecked expression on his face, he sighed even more when he noticed Oikawa in the room, greeting him tiredly.
He robably was the cause for Iwaizumi's awkwardness.
“Kuroo-san...can I give you some things to analyse? I know you have something else to do right now, and I’d rather do it myself, but...” looking at Oikawa again, Akaashi didn't dare to say what he actually wanted.
Enough time for Kuroo to let his head sank. More work? Yeah, he liked his job, but he would also like to have a proper sleep every once in a while at home, where...he wouldn't get today, again. All because of that jerk of a detective!
If Oikawa knew how to do some analyses without burning down the entire labratory, it would have been a lot easier. However, even having Akaashi delegating his tasks...it was too much.
Speaking of the detective...the brunette man noticed that Iwaizumi's assistant was almost staring at him intensely and he went into offence to ask him directly.
“Do you need something, Akaashi-kun?”
“Actually...yes.”
That surprised Oikawa and he blinked at the other guy, who tried to wage his words carefully before speaking. He didn't want to upset Oikawa.
“I need you to calm down a certain forensic doctor who asks me to assist, which I don’t think is a good idea, since you are the detective in charge. And furthermore, I don't want to end up with my head hit by a scalpel.”
“I’ll gladly give you a safe shelter if you need, Akaashi-kun" Kuroo smirked, but glanced over to Oikawa, curious about his reaction. And while he himself found it somehow funny, that Iwaizumi seemed a little bit off track of his usual professionalism, Oikawa's eyes widened with a puzzled expression on his face.
Scalpel?
“As you have to wait for the analyses results anyway, it may be possible for you? Please”
Akaashi usually didn't request anything like that in such a straightforward way, but it was necessary now.
“I mean...you work in this case together, don’t you?” he insisted.
Oikawa stared at him, clearly shocked, and shot a glance at Kuroo, then back at Akaashi. Before he could say anything, the chemist took the lead and got closer, pushing him on the shoulders, right to the door.
“He’s right, I need time to do these properly. So you won't get anything right away!”
The detective didn't need to fight back, it was no use. He sighed and rolled his eyes.
“Fine, I'll do this. Where is our dangerous future murderer?”
Akaashi nodded, turning around and making a gesture that he should follow. Kuroo waved at him with a little smirk and turned back to his work when both of them left the labratory.
"I have to go to the office first. So...just go ahead. You'll find him in the morgue, as usual" Iwaizumi's colleague and assistant smiled softly.
And there he was, left alone on the corridor.
So...he should do this, right? What should he say? And why was Iwaizumi in such a state anyway? Throwing scalpels? That clearly didn't sound like the forensic doctor he had known so far.
Inhaling deeply, Oikawa went to the morgue as he was told.
Entering without knocking, like he usually did, he observed the room for a moment. The stretcher with the body on it, the small table with tools and...where was Iwaizumi?
Oh, he was kneeling down, collecting the scattered pieces on a tray, deeply lost in thought. Giving a pretty view of his butt, even under his coat.
Oikawa's lips curled up subconsciously.
“I was told that a dangerous forensic doctor is likely to kill his assistants with a scalpel because he’s too stressed?” he made himself noticeable, hands in his pockets, coming closer.
When Iwaizumi heard him, he flinched again. His body wanted to jump up and there was a nice metal sound when his head hit the desk, making him drop the tray and the stuff on it in an instant.
“Fuck it” he swore, holding his hurt head with a hand, and crawled from under the desk again, straightening up.
“Who wants to kill who?” Iwaizumi just groaned and suddenly felt a stinging pain on his finger.
He looked at his hand, figuring out that the source of the pain was a little cut on the tip of his left indexfinger. He must have cut it with the scalpel when he had dropped everything again. Hissing, he went to the sink, to let some water run over the small wound and wrapped a paper tissue around his finger.
“Who said that?!”
Oikawa chuckled lightly at Iwaizumi’s mess and approached him.
“Who knows, that’s a secret!” he answered with a wink, but took his hand gently in his, observing the cut carefully.
His other hand reached for his coat's pockets, searching for a small plaster he always had with him, since he had a thing for getting tiny scratches while digging in too deep into his researches.
“A doctor should always treat a wound properly, you know?” Oikawa murmured in a low tune, as he finally put the patch on Iwaizumi's finger, who frowned and looked up, halfly sulking.
Letting go of the shorter male's hand with a smile, the detective kneeled down and started to collect the tools, putting them on the tray again.
Just at the right moment, because Iwaizumi's cheeks turned red in embarassment. The warm feeling, having his hand being hold like that, gave him goosebumps.
Seeing his smile, just for a moment, made his heart skip beats. It was as if nothing had ever happened. As if they just continued from the point where they had sat at Osamu's, practising for the party. The same crackling atmosphere, how his heart was set on fire. Even after those days...
Iwaizumi ran a hand through his hair.
Damn it...stop it! Stop your stupid tachycardia. There’s no reason for that!
“Did...I scare Akaashi so much that he didn't dare to come back?” he asked quietly, sighing.
Oikawa looked up from his position, then stood up again, putting the tray on the small stand next to him.
“I think he just needed a little break. He's in the office for something anyway" he answered, lifting an eyebrow, “But speaking of a break...since when are you throwing tools around? If you aren’t okay, just go home and take a rest.”
“He startled me. I was just lost in thoughts and then I stumbled and the rest...well, you see” Iwaizumi answered quickly, lowering his head like a child who knew that he had done something unreasonable and feared to be scolded again. But not replying to Oikawa's last sentence, he suppressed the urge to say 'look who’s talking'.
Glancing over to him, Iwaizumi finally turned around, getting a finger glove for the injured hand with the patch on, and then he walked around, getting new sterile tools in silence.
“I’ll apologise to him later”
Only the metal sounds were to be heard, while he was watched by the detective who was bitting his bottom lip. Fumbling with his fingers nervously, he made two attempts to speak up, but actually needed a third try to manage.
“Talking about apologies...I think...I owe you one” he started, looking at the forensic doctor's back for a second, but quickly looked away when the olive-green eyes searched his own.
He didn't even know why he suddenly felt so nervous. Maybe it was just because...Oikawa Tooru had never apologized in his life before, and it felt odd to do so.
Iwaizumi's eyes widened a bit hearing those words, but there was also a little smirk on his lips. Turning around slowly to catch a glimpse of Oikawa, he saw how the detective struggled with himself, with the situation. Exhaling, Iwaizum's shoulders relaxed a bit.
“Okay...I'll listen to you. Whatever you have to say, I’ll listen” he promised calmly and meant it, putting the things he had in his hands aside and leaning on the worktop, waiting patiently for Oikawa to proceed.
“I...I’m sorry. For everything” the detective continued with another inhale, looking Iwaizumi in his eyes, because he wanted him to know that he meant those words.
“I’m...just not used to...open up to anyone. And I’m not used to people...caring for me” he played with his fingers and instinctively brought his hand to his chest, where the necklace with the ring was hidden underneath his clothes. Somehow his skin tingled uncomfortably around that spot.
“So, I’m...sorry that you worried about me. That you were scared...I was scared myself...I guess that’s why I disappeared for a few days...” sighing then, he rubbed his neck, “Listen, when I said that I wish you happiness and all...I meant it. Because you’re a great man, Iwa-chan, I haven’t met anyone like you...and I don’t want to hurt you anymore so...please, accept my apologies.”
Oikawa glanced at him for a moment, nervously, then lowered his gaze again and waited for an answer or just a word from the other.
Iwaizumi faced him more when the detective talked, watching how he made his way through that apology. Even if his words made Iwaizumi feel kind of sad, he still couldn't drop his soft smile. Listening to every word, he thought for a moment how to express it right...what he felt, what was on his mind.Eventually making a step forward, taking another one, he stopped right in front of the taller man. And because this one had his gaze lowered, Iwaizumi decided to bend down, squatting in front of him and taking the detective's hands in his, forcing him to look him into the eyes.
Oikawa's brown eyes showed sadness, sorrow, while trying to regain his composure which felt so difficult as soon as he had his hands grabbed by the forensic doctor.
“Apologies accepted” Iwaizumi smiled at him sincerely, while rubbing gently over the other's skin with his thumbs, “And...thank you for your words, for explaining to me. And caring and opening up a little bit now.“
He gave an encouraging smile, letting him know that he really meant it. Strange...why was he suddenly feeling so proud of him?
"And I’m sorry if I pushed too much. I sometimes am...a brute, and I know that. Can you forgive me too?“ Iwaizumi asked quietly back.
“You did nothing wrong” Oikawa squeezed the hands back.
“Hey...don’t defend my asshole side!” Iwaizumi slightly joked and stood up again, “May you allow me to do something I wanted to do since that hospital night?” he added almost shyly, blinking with a light pinkish tone on his cheeks.
Oikawa blinked too, totally confused.
“Sure...you won’t kill me, will you?"
Hajime looked at him, totally irritated, and then...unwillingly, he had to burst in laughter. Just a bit, for a few seconds.
He made Oikawa's lips curl into a pout. He calmed down soon again.
“I won’t. Not when I already nearly killed my assistant. One murder per day, you know the unspoken rule."
But enough with the joking. Iwaizumi gave him a soft smile he wasn't even aware he could make. So soft, so gentle, almost...in love...
His arms reached carefully forward, around the detective's torso, and pulled him into a close embrace. His hands rested on Oikawa‘s head, feeling the soft curls that tickled his fingertips. Getting closer, as much as he could.
"I’m glad...welcome home, Tooru" it was merely a whisper that left his lips.
Oikawa stayed still while Iwaizumi was hugging him, because he was surprised and slightly shocked. He couldn't even spill a word as his mind was such a mess.
His cheeks were all red, his heart was beating so fast. And the reason for that...he...had an idea.
Especially when he heard his name again, sounding so sweet on Iwaizumi's lips. And that little welcome home...it made him smile a bit.
Reaching out, his arms wrapped about the other too. But he didn't dare to call him by his given name too. Maybe...it was uncomfortable for him., so he just went with...
“Thank you...Iwa-chan.”
Iwaizumi hadn't expected anything when he hugged him. It was already enough, that Oikawa allowed him to do so. But as th other held him too, embracing him back...God, he got the chills. A warm shiver was sent down his spine. The warmth, the heat, how his body responded, almost snuggling up closer, wanting to feel so much of him...almost feeling satisfied.
“Mhm~” he only nodded and caressed the other’s hair carefully, tilting his head more to the side and inhaling his comfortable scent.
His nose was brushing the soft spot right next to his ear. He loved the feeling of Oikawa’s hair between his fingers. He loved to trace the curls’ shape with his fingertips. He loved that scent of his which made him feel so safe.
And Oikawa let himself to be lulled in by Iwaizumi's touch, closing his eyes, inhaling that perfect scent of his...he felt safe. He really felt...home.
When he noticed that Iwaizumi's nose tip brushed his jawline, Oikawa slightly flinched under the sudden tingling. The closness of their bodies, hearing the slow breathing of each other. He felt dizzy.
“You finally calmed down, Iwaizumi-san” Akaashi said, as he suddenly entered the morgue while holding some documents in his hands.
The two men almost jumped in surprise, immediately breaking the embrace and trying to look as unaffected as possible. Fortunately, their racing heartbeats couldn't be heard.
"I’ll go seeing if Kuroo has finished the analysis. It’ll be a long night here” Oikawa coughed a bit, speaking to Iwaizumi and just escaped through the door to leave the two doctors work in peace. More or less, because Iwaizumi's expression was unmistakable as his red cheeks and wide eyes were. Staring after Oikawa for a moment, he cleared his throat and mind.
He turned around to Akaashi, who put the documents down on the desk. Iwaizumi rubbed his neck, lowering his gaze as he was caught red handed and...he was sure Akaashi had seen it all. Even if he didn't say so. But he couldn't deny how good it had felt. The embrace. How their bodies perfectly fitted each other. How Oikawa's lips would perfectly fit in the crook of his neck.
How embarrassing...
“S-sorry...I...have to apology to you, Keiji. I’m really sorry for before.”
“It's okay, as long as you're feeling better now. Let’s start the autopsy, shall we?”
Iwaizumi rolled his eyes. That was just Akaashi's way to tell him 'I knew it', but he decided to drop it and focus on the work now.
It would surely be a long night.
*
Kuroo was working on the microscope, when Oikawa entered again.
“So? Did you manage to calm down our Mr-dangerous-doctor?” he asked, not looking up at first as he recognised his friend by his footsteps. But when he looked up, because he changed the small glass plate, he...blinked. Twice. He cracked a smile because he noticed Oikawa's flushed cheeks.
“Do you feel better yourself?” he suggested, smirking.
"Shut up."
Right after, the detective's smile only widened and he gazed at an invisible spot in front of him, dream-like.
“I...I've never felt like this before” Tooru explained quietly, feeling his heart still pounding fiercely against his chest.
Iwaizumi’s grip, holding him, his sweetness, his too nice and perfect scent...his hands, stroking his hair...
Oikawa never imagined he would need this. All of this, until now.
It was the kind of knowledge he had never experienced before, to have a need like this, being satisfied and happy. But also craving for more.
More warmth, more closness, more...
“You know...what kind of feeling is it, my dear friend?” Kuroo added with a wide grin now, as he kept watching the other.
Seeing Oikawa like that was a first, and he liked it...seeing his friend like this. Experiencing love.
“It's not...! It’s not what you think!” Oikawa snapped immediately and got frustrated all of a sudden for nothing, “Iwa-chan is only a friend!” he tried to convince the chemist, because that goddamn smirk wasn't disappearing from his face. How upsetting!
“Mhm~ I didn't assume anything else” Kuroo chirped, “Happiness because of a good friend is legit, you know.” he hummed and turned around to his microscope again.
However, he would never forget Oikawa's still flustered face. He pouted, as he couldn't do anything against the little thoughts in Kuroo's head.
Love...no way.
He really liked Iwa-chan's company and was really happy to be with him, but...not like that. Of course not.
*
“Keiji, you can go home for now” Iwaizumi announced when the clock stroke almost ten.
After Akane had came back, they compared their proofs, validating them and putting them into transparent little bags or in petri dishes. Labeling them, they also finished the documentation stuff and cleaned up every tool.
The young woman yawned heartfully and rubbed her eyes. As thrilling as the work was, it was exhausting too. She really wondered how people, her mentor and Akaashi, couldn't be tired at all but she was sure that they had only learned to overcome that point with energy drinks, caffeine or just going on like a long distance runner would do.
“Bring her home, okay?” Iwaizumi requested, hearing her loud yawn. She was already half-napping, sitting on the chair at the desk.
“But you're far from done” his assistent looked around, looking at the huge amount of papers on the table which had to undergo a check-up.
“Yeah I know, but just give me some time alone with the lady here. We made a lot of progress, but I have the feeling I didn't get something right.”
Akaashi and Akane exchanged some looks but they knew that it wasn't possible to convince him otherwise and therefore they said good-bye, leaving the morgue within the next five minutes.
Sometimes, Iwaizumi just needed his time and although he believed in his team, there were some moments he just had to go through everything again on his own. It was nothing personal and Akaashi explained it to the young woman who was actually a little bit irritated.
“I’ll take a quick look at Kuroo's” Akaashi pointed at the labratory next door, “Give me a minute.”
She nodded and replied that she would go ahead to the entrance hall. The assistant with the short and slightly curled black hair thanked her and walked over to his colleague's room, knocking at the door.
“Kuroo-san, how is it going? We’re about heading home.”
“I see, Akaashi. Then have a safe ride home, okay?" Kuroo replied with a little smile and then Akaashi glanced over, looking at the detective sitting on a chair, half asleep in a relaxed posture.
“He’s just tired, don’t worry” Kuroo chuckled, as Oikawa suddenly snored a little. "I'll take care of him."
Akaashi nodded, and then left the room.
*
Iwaizumi had sat down on a stool and looked at the dead woman with her head to him, with crossed arms in front of his chest.
Something was off...
Yes, she had been poisoned, but there was that atypical carotid artery's stenosis. For her young age, it was strange as she didn't have any medical record, considering vascular diseases. They found the cyanide, as the blood samples told them about it, and of course the typical smell coming from her mouth.
If only the dead could speak...
Akane's evidence research didn't help at all. So...what was this?
Sighing, his eyes wandered off to the clock above the door, when his stomach started rumbling. It was almost eleven. When was the last time he had eaten?!
Oh right...the snack bar before going to the gym.
He stood up, shoved the body back into the cooling box and closed the door.
With every move, he felt how the metal in his pants' pocket pressed against his upper thigh. He took it out to release himself from the unpleasant mechanical pressure.
He couldn't keep it in a pocket the whole time, else he would lose it some day. He couldn't leave it at home either.
Maybe it was childish and he wasn't the type for superstition, but just the thought of not having it with him made his heart clench.
Then he got an idea.
Walking over to his desk, he opened the drawer and started searching for something until he found it. Taking out a long leather tape (the facility management had sent him instead of package tape) Iwaizumi was happy to finally have a use for it. Cutting off a fair length of strap, he pulled the ring through, making a knot and putting it on over his head, letting it slide beneath his pullover. He shivered a bit when the cold metal hit his skin, but it felt better.
Putting on his coat, he decided to go for some fast food to calm down his tummy. However, before he did so, Iwaizumi turned to the right, peeking into Kuroo's laboratory.
"Hey, I'm off for grabbing some food. Do you want-"
He paused when his eyes landed on the sleeping detective right in front of him, sitting (or half laying) in a chair, asleep. He was snoring quietly. Iwaizumi's lips curled up to a soft smile, and he approached his colleague, whispering, not to wake up the brunette.
“Anything I should grab for you? I’m starving and the night may be even longer for me here” he said to Kuroo, but couldn't stop himself from glancing over to the peaceful looking detective.
"I'm fine" Kuroo waved off, looking through the microscope and then straightened up to look at the forensic doctor, "But can you grab something for him? I guess he hasn’t eaten properly for days now” he smirked, as he noticed how Iwaizumi was staring again at his friend, "You know, he's like some man-child sometimes. Or often. It depends on his mood. Taking care of himself hasn't been one of his strong points ever."
The other just kept listening, when Kuroo stood up, and walked over to Oikawa. He talked quietly to him, something about 'getting up' and "let's lay you down".
Iwaizumi didn't think that it would work, but Oikawa hummed indeed, sleepily, and didn't even open his eyes. The chemist helped him laying down and then took the blanked from the end of the stretcher, covering Oikawa to his shoulders.
“Ah, wait! Better idea!” Iwaizumi suddenly broke in and made the other lift his eyebrows in confusion.
The forensic doctor left the labratory for half a minute, but then he came back with his best blanket and pillow from the hospital private patient's ward.
“Don’t you dare keep it, it's my comfort stuff!" he gave a wry smile, removing the other blanket and carefully covered the detective himself. Protectively.
Iwaizumi continued talking in a quieter and lower tone, "Actually, a nurse gave it to me when I complained about sleeping issues a while ago. It’s a weighted blanket. Guess, it's just the right thing Oikawa needs...”
As he said so, he already had the pillow in his hand and shoved it carefully under the detective’s head, lifting it only a few inches. With that caring smile of his, Iwaizumi looked down at him and stroked a chaotic brown curl from his forehead to the side. Ah, no! He was still under Kuroo's observative eyes!
Straightening up fast, he turned on his heels and cleared his throat, not even looking at the chemist who had that 'Oh, I so know what this is about' expression, written all over his face.
“I-I’m back in a few minutes!”
Kuroo smiled and shook his head lightly, as Iwaizumi left the labratory, his fast footsteps were to be heard on the empty corridor.
“You’re so lucky to have such a caring friend who loves you...” Kuroo said quietly to the sleepy detective with a smirk.
After some time, he left the labratory too. He hadn't planned to stay there longer than eleven and had his analysis finished anyway. Also, he hadn't lied to Iwaizumi, that he was fine with no food, he just hadn't said a word about returning home. Because that would have meant waking Oikawa up and somehow, the chemist had a feeling that he should offer them some time for themselves, with each other.
How Oikawa came back, with that lovey-dovey expression he denied so much...the way Iwaizumi covered him with the blanket, as if he was collecting some tiny little bird which needed all his love...
Friends? No way. Not like this.
And so Iwaizumi stood in front of a dark laboratory, half-closed door, and knitted his eyebrows in confusion.
Did he miss something?
With a bag full of stuff Oikawa might like, he shoved the door quietly open. So, Kuroo was really gone...and so was Oikawa.
"Really now? Why should I bring him something anyway...” Iwaizumi mumbled a little bit frustrated and stepped in, as he was there anyway.
In the dark, he didn't want to stumble over something. Putting the full bag on the desk, he searched for the light.
The lamp had a dimmed light level...where was the switch?
When he noticed the low sounds of somebody's breathing, Oikawa's breathing he could so easily identify, he nearly jumped for a second, because he hadn't expected that the detective was still there.
Oikawa suddenly turned around the stretcher, switching sides, and maybe he was thinking that it was actually his bed as he did it in such a quick way...too quick. Just a second after, he fell down on the floor with a bump, followed by a shifting sound that came from the weighted blanket.
Iwaizumi turned around, flinching by the sudden fall.
“What the-" Oikawa mumbled with a pained sound, now fully awake.
Rubbing his eyes, still sleepy, he looked around, but didn't notice Iwaizumi as it was still dark in that damn room. He recognised the chemistry labratory at least, as he swore under his breath.
“Kuroo...you little...leaving me here like this...”
“H-hey, are you okay?!” he heard the familiar voice of Iwaizumi speaking, hearing someone coming closer, bending down next to him, “That sounded...pretty painful!”
Totally forgotten about the light, the forensic doctor's eyes had finally accustomed to the dark, and with the light stripes which came from the small windows, he could actually figure out Oikawa's silhouette and his features. Of course, the same went for Oikawa, who stared at the other in surprise, still in a little dizzy state.
“I-Iwa-chan...?” and then the pain shot into his lower back, “Ouch, that hurts!” he rubbed the spot over his coccyx, “What are you doing here? It’s pretty late!”
"I just wanted to grab some food. And Kuroo clearly wanted me to bring something for you too" Iwaizumi explained with a concerned voice, "Can you move?"
"Yeah, yeah. Don't worry" Oikawa refused any worry for him and straightened up a bit, "But great, Kuroo is sleeping in his comfy bed now!" he complained, grumbling, then glancing over to Iwaizumi, as he had mentioned...food.
Oh, that was nice! Food was good! Food was...what he actually needed now!
So his eyes lit up and he leaned in, looking at the other male with sparkling eyes.
“What...did you buy?” he asked the other male, as he looked at him with sparkling eyes.
Iwaizumi smirked at that reaction. That was another kind of sparkling in his eyes. He couldn't compare it to the one when Oikawa had looked up to the stars, with the melancholy on his face. This one there was of pure joy, craving for something good: hunger.
"Wow...I don’t need lights to see now" he muttered and stood up to finally switch on the lights.
A warm dimmed one filled the room within seconds, and the first thing which was visible for Oikawa was Iwaizumi's mess of hair. As it got late, he seemed to ruffle it more and more in need to stay awake. Somehow, it was cute and the detective's fingers tingled a bit, wanting to touch that messy spiky hair, bringing it into order.
"Actually, I could only go to the conbini, but they warmed it up" Iwaizumi took the bag with the food, unpacking it and putting all the stuff on the desk.
"Some bento with pork, curry pan, soba pan and..." he smiled over to the detective "Some milkbread. And I got free pudding too, because the cashier had problems with the register and I had to wait. Ah, and some coffee and tea. Tea is okay, right?"
Oikawa jumped all over excited at the sight of milkbread. Leaning over Iwaizumi's shoulder, staring at the goods, his smile got even wider.
“You remembered I love milkbread?! And yes, tea is more than perfect!” he exclaimed, choosing one of the bentos with pork, sat down on one of the swivel chairs and waited for the other male to pick his own food.
Just when Iwaizumi sat down too, he started to dig in eagerly. Funny...he hadn't felt hungry at all, but now, being awake, more relaxed and having Iwaizumi's company...it was different.
Iwaizumi watched Oikawa in amusement and relief, how he was already eating so ambitiously, being so happy because of the milkbread...his smile got more genuine, then he chuckled slightly and finally his wonderful carefree laughter echoed in the labratory for some seconds.
“Of course I do” he reassured him, starting with the other bento too, “I’m good at memory games, you know.”
But the real reason was another.
How can I forget something that makes your eyes sparkle like that?
Oikawa looked up, mouth full. How could he be so...cute and caring? Why did his own heart started to pound so strongly when he was in front of Iwaizumi?
Most of all...why did those questions keep plopping up? And why did he really...
“Your hair is so messy, Iwa-chan” he reached with his hand for Iwaizumi's head, when he had finished his meal, and touched spiky hair to arrange it for the better. To have an excuse to touch him at all.
Iwaizumi just brushed off some curry off his lip with his thumb, licking it up, as he suddenly felt the slim hand in his hair. Surprised, he blinked in an almost cute way, but held still.
His pulse ran immediately faster and the heat caught him. It wasn't caused by the spicy food.
It...it was such a nice feeling. Had Oikawa felt that way too, when he had caressed his hair?
“Y-yeah?! I didn’t notice...” Iwaizumi muttered, trying not to look so affected by the fingers that moved in slow circles, doing everything but arranging the dark strands neatly.
Slowly looking up to the detective, he smirked a bit.
“What about you, you sleepy head?” his hoarse voice sounded, reaching for a resistant funny brunette curl of Oikawa's, brushing it behind the detective’s ear and touching the soft skin of his auricle accidentally.
Oikawa got the chills at his touch and froze, just staring at Iwaizumi. He was totally caught off-guard. He stared into those olive-green eyes that looked so soft at him. But Iwaizumi wasn't aware that he wore that gentle expression, that his smile was so soft, so in love too. That his touch was also so much softer than it should be.
And looking into Oikawa's - no...Tooru - looking into Tooru’s chocolate brown eyes, he started to feel nervous but also very calm at the same time, because there was no other place he would feel so safe at all.
His hand stroked down, almost unnoticeably. Now tracing the shape of the other’s ear on purpose. He noticed how his own fingertips started tingling, tracing down Tooru's cheek for one, two inches, while Iwaizumi's smile got more faint, his expression more sincere and his heart pounding so much louder.
Tooru wouldn't take notice, right!? It was just...imagination caused by goddamn hormones which were distributed in such a huge amount, he felt overwhelmed.
He almost fell in trance, being somehow closer than just two minutes ago.
And Oikawa observed every expression of his, Iwaizumi's touches on his skin caused countless shivers down his spine.
What are you doing to me?
And then, they were so close they could feel each other's breath on their lips. Getting lost in Iwaizumi's features, Oikawa realised it. He snapped back to reality.
That can't happen! Hajime is just a friend. Just a colleague. I will ruin everything if we cross that line!
He suddenly withdrew, clearing his throat, making some polite space between them again and looked around with an uncomfortable expression.
Iwaizumi blinked, lowering his gaze as he saw how Oikawa withdrew and swallowed hard. Damn it...
He wasn't even able to ask what it was, why Oikawa reacted like that. His own heart was pounding so loud in his ears. His mind felt dizzy.
“I...I think I’m going to, you know, analyse the analysis Kuroo finished...” Oikawa said.
What the hell did he just say? It was no good. Not at all!
“Y-yeah...me too. Body the...body”
That didn't even make sense!
“I’m going to sleep here afterwards, and...you have to finish your autopsy!” Oikawa hinted to him, then collected the heavy blanket and the pillow to give it back to the forensic doctor, “You need these more than I do, I’m used to sleep in worse places, you know”
“Let’s see who falls asleep first. If it’s you, you get these back” the forensic doctor returned the smile a little bit awkwardly, slight embarrassment was to be seen on his cheeks, "So...tell me, if there is anything eh...interesting, about those analysis.”
Gosh. He was so done.
“I do, but be sure: it won’t be me falling asleep, though!”
They should call it an end there. Maybe. Unfortunately.
Iwaizumi stood up from his chair, taking the two empty plastic bentou boxes and taking them to the bin right next to the door.
He would leave the milkbread there for Oikawa, and then he waved lightly, turning to leave, his mind was much more deserted than before.
That hadn't been the plan.
He had wanted to clear his mind. His heart. Nothing more.
And now...he was a mess.
How close they had gotten...just a few more inches and he would have been able to...
Giving a large sigh when he stood into his morgue, he leaned with his forehead on the wall for a second, closing his eyes.
He. Was. So. Done.
*
And it also hadn't been the plan, that Oikawa would win that stupid challenge. Just when the detective found something strange about the analysis, he decided to ask Iwaizumi for an opinion, heading straight to the morgue to tell him. But what he found, instead of a fully awake forensic doctor, was a sleeping one on the stretcher.
The detective put his hands on his hips, chuckling and got that picture memorised for a few seconds. Then he went back, getting the pillow and the blanket, covering Iwaizumi properly.
As he was bent over him, his eyebrows lifted. God...he was so cute when he was asleep. He was so...handsome. And he had damn long lashes which Oikawa hadn't noticed before, laying flat on his cheekbone. But his hair was still a mess.
With a soft smile, Oikawa arranged the front part of the resistent strands, and his fingertips slowly carressed his cheek. Stroking it gently until he reached Iwaizumi's jawline.
However, he suddenly pulled back as if he had burnt himself.
What am I doing?!
Blushing like a mess, he left the morgue quietly, going back to the laboratory and sank into the chair, head falling down on the desk.
What the hell...was he doing...
Notes:
There’s no angst without comfort...what’s gonna happen next?
Thank you so much as always!! You’re all so lovely! <3
Chapter 11: Confessions
Summary:
“Thank you, Hajime-kun” and as Atsumu said so, he gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek.
Hajime searched for some distraction with his eyes in the room.
His gaze stopped somewhere...and he went pale.
Tooru.
He was standing at the door, holding two cups in his hands, staring at them in disbelief. Iwaizumi's heart cracked the same time Oikawa's did.
Notes:
We're back again! Saru talking here, I'm so sorry I didn't update sooner, I had lot of school stuff and wasn't feeling well lately, but here it is! I'll be sure to update twice this week as an apology. Enjoy <3
Chapter Text
When the morning came, Oikawa was the first of them who woke up.
Opening his eyes slowly, being welcomed by some soft rays of sunlight which made their way through the shutter of the small window above him, his mind showed him the picture of Iwaizumi's - no...Hajime's - pure and sleepy face. He sat up, stretching his still tired body, before jumping from the stretcher and making his way to him, to check on him.
The corridor was still unoccupied as it was early. Walking to the morgue, he shoved the door open as silent as possible.
Walking quietly, he got closer to the figure laying on the stretcher ahead, still covered with the blanket he had put on him the night before.
Oikawa smiled softly at the sleeping forensic doctor, letting him sleep for another five minutes as he was about going to the vending machine, buying a coffee for Iwaizumi and a hot chocolate for himself - his favourite drink. Of course it wouldn't be as good as the homemade one, or the one made by the cafés he sometimes liked to visit.
But as he would drink it together with the forensic doctor, it was more than good enough.
*
When Oikawa left, the door clicked shut and, although it was only a quiet noise, it woke Iwaizumi up. He had just wanted to take a little nap after his handwriting become messier and messier on the documents last night...but it had turned into a deep long sleep.
He hadn't even noticed that he had been covered with the blanket by Oikawa, and he wondered where and when did the blanket come to him.
A thought rushed his mind when he sat up and rubbed his eyes with a long yawn.
Did he...?
That was the only possibility, right?
A soft smile appeared on Iwaizumi's lips, and he got a bit lost in his thoughts, thinking of the late night dinner he had had with Oikawa. The moment when he had touched his soft skin and how Oikawa's hand had run through his hair...
With a dreamlike expression on his face, he didn't notice the sudden appearance of another person, and reacted with a little flinch when he heard the voice calling out to him.
"Hey, good morning!"
Maybe Iwaizumi got so startled because he had expected Oikawa or Akaashi or anyone other but the bold detective he had his date with yesterday.
He wasn't expecting Atsumu Miya.
Atsumu hadn't planned his visit. At first, it had been a sudden glimpse of an idea, nothing more.
He wanted to surprise the forensic doctor he had interest in. He wanted to invite him over for breakfast or lunch or anything else, so they could continue what they had had to finish too early the day before.
And of course, it was only a guess as he didn't know Iwaizumi's schedule, but his gut told him that he maybe would be lucky if he was coming over to the morgue.
There he was. Lucky.
Atsumu smiled at Iwaizumi's surprised expression and approached closer. So...he had slept there, uh?
“H-hey...” Iwaizumi replied, confused in his state between sleep and awakening, “Uh...do you have work that early here?” he asked and didn't get at all that Atsumu came for him and nobody else.
Still...why was a lump starting to build up in his throat?
Then his brain started to work...
Oh my...this isn’t...
He clearly had forgotten himself last night, as much as he had with Atsumu in the afternoon.
And although nothing had happened last night...he felt guilty.
Well, maybe nothing was not exactly what happened. Caressing someone’s hair and cheek like he did and...almost having...
Iwaizumi's eyebrows knitted a bit.
“I actually came for you,” Atsumu cleared his throat a bit, stopping in front of him and trying to explain himself better, “I wanted to invite you for breakfast or lunch today. To make it up, you know...after what happened yesterday and all.”
It took him quite some courage, but since they had shared such a sweet little goodbye in the car before, the detective was confident about Iwaizumi's response.
So he kept smiling and waited patiently for an answer as the other male still didn't seem to be awake.
"My, it seems you party hard, uh?"
“Ah...eh...yeah...something like that," Iwaizumi muttered and tried to focus again, "So...shouldn’t that be my turn? I mean, I was the one who had to dump you”
Just go with it. Nothing's wrong! All is okay.
Iwaizumi put on a wry smile and shoved himself from the stretcher to his feet. Straightening his back a bit more, his muscles were sore, but not as much as he had expected it. Thanks to the pillow, his neck didn't hurt at all.
Looking up at the clock above the door, he checked the time: it was 8am already. Delay. Totally in delay.
With slightly widened eyes, Iwaizumi got over to his desk, starting to collect the papers there, as his assistants would come in an hour and he still hadn't finshed all of it.
“Okay...let’s say...I won’t be done before 2pm again, I guess..." he spoke to Atsumu, who looked at him in slight amusement, "Is it too late?”
He stared at the detective for a brief moment, rubbing his neck, having bad bed hair even worse than the previous evening. The forensic doctor sorted the documents and mumbled more to himself than to him: “I hope that Tooru got more results than I have” because there were still a lot of question that didn't have an answer yet.
But Atsumu hadn't heard him, nor the mention of his enemy's name, and he just approached Iwaizumi from behind, placing a hand gently on the other male's shoulder.
“It’s perfect, don’t worry. I’ll come picking you up then,” he replied in a much lower voice, looking at him in his eyes for a moment as their gaze crossed because of the sudden gesture Atsumu had gone for.
“Thank you, Hajime-kun” and as he said so, he gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek.
They both didn't know that they were being observed just when Atsumu kissed Hajime like that.
Oikawa had taken the coffee and the hot chocolate from the machine, and was only about entering the morgue quietly, when he heard a too familiar and annoying voice calling Iwaizumi by his given name. He saw them through the crack of the door Atsumu had left open, and witnessed at that little affectionae gesture.
This...couldn't be real, right?
Clenching the plastic cups in his hands a bit, the drinks nearly sloshed, but Oikawa couldn't care less.
He had been so happy...how they had managed to make up, how they had worked together, how he himself had managed to open up to Hajime, because even if it had been only a little, it was much progress!
And now...this?
Iwaizumi flinched instinctively back, when Atsumu's lips brushed his cheek, stumbling against his desk.
What the hell...was his body doing to him?!
He swallowed, putting on a smile, but avoiding eye-contact.
“S-sorry I’m not...awake, I guess...” he excused himself with a pitiful reason, searching for some distraction with his eyes in the room.
His gaze stopped somewhere...and he went pale.
Tooru.
He was standing at the door, holding two cups in his hands, staring at them in disbelief. Iwaizumi's heart cracked the same time Oikawa's did.
No, no, no...!
Atsumu didn't take notice, shaking only his head because everything was alright. Looking up at the forensic doctor, he then narrowed his eyes, noticing the shocked expression on the other's face. Following his gaze, he slowly turned his head over his shoulder...
What the hell is that asshole doing here?
But it was too late: Oikawa already stepped back. One, two, then turned left and rushed to Kuroo's labratory. His friend had only arrived, still dressed in his outdoor jacket when he got startled by the brunette and nearly jumped to the side.
"Oikawa, what the hell-" he wanted to ask, but Oikawa cut him off in an instant.
“Give...give this to...Iwaizumi.”
His voice sounded hoarse, broken, and he clearly seemed out of his mind. He just put down the cups on the desk and left without any other word. Even though Kuroo was yeeling after him.
Staring at the two cups that the detective left, the chemist wondered what that was all about? One cup of coffee and one with hot chocolate, Oikawa’s favorite.
And what was with that panicked face and his sudden change of calling Hajime ‘Iwaizumi’ instead of ‘Iwa-chan’...?
But right as he thought he would have now got a minute to undo the zipper of his jacket, the next figure entered in a rush and made Kuroo jump again.
"Hell, what's wrong with all of you?" he complained about the next heart attack he had just suffered from. He looked at Iwaizumi in the eyes and he was...very, very pale.
“Have you seen Tooru?!” he shouted and looked around, checking, if the detective was hiding.
He wasn't.
His eyes focused on the desk...the cups. He had been there. He had been there and left in a hurry as the drinks had sloshed over the cup lips. He left. He fled.
Fuck...I...so fucked up.
“Where is he?!” he shouted again, now even more worried.
Worried because he didn't want to have him disappear again. Worried because he didn't want to lose his trust.
Or...had he already? Because he and Atsumu had just...?
“He just left...Iwaizumi, what happened? He looked like...well...” Kuroo said, not knowing how to describe it, "Like he was shocked by something? Startled to his core?"
The forensic doctor gritted his teeth, looking aside and running a hand through his hair.
“He...he just saw...Atsumu, I guess...fuck, Kuroo! We had just made up! He even opened up a little bit to me! I can't lose him again!"
Iwaizumi ruffled his hair in desperation, looking at the other into his eyes again with a pleading expression .
"Do you have...any idea where he could be? Or...at least his number?"
“No, I...” Kuroo tried to avoid a clear answer, because Oikawa was really picky about giving anyone his number. It had even taken Kuroo quite some time to get it himself.
“Please! If there’s any chance...I beg you!” Iwaizumi insisted. Pleaded.
He had never seen the forensic doctor pleading. He'd never seen him like this.
He...was some special case for Oikawa, right? And if there was one thing Kuroo didn't want at all, it was that Oikawa would get himself into trouble again.
“Fuck it!” he then mumbled, writing down the detective’s number on a small piece of paper and handing it over to the other male, whose shoulders sank in some relief, as he received just a chance.
“But, Iwaizumi” Kuroo called him, as the forensic doctor was already about to leave, making him stop again.
“Don’t chase him if you’re fine with Miya. Don’t feel guilty just because Oikawa hates him, okay?”
Iwaizumi paused, but looked at the chemist with sincere eyes and a sad smile.
“I don’t feel guilty because he hates him,” he said, “If that was the case...everything would be much easier. It’s more like...”
He thought for a moment, stroking over the spot where the improvised necklace with the ring was hidden.
“I just...I don’t want...I dunno. I’m feeling guilty, even though...” stammering around, he looked up again after staring at an invisible point, and finally gave some sort of admitting smile.
“The following words may sound stupid, I know, but...he got under my skin. I don’t know how and why, but I care more for him than I had ever cared for anyone in my entire life. I want to stay side by side. Iwant to stay by his side. If I let him go now...I’ll definitely regret it.”
Rushing out, unware that he had made a confession, he left Kuroo in his laboratory, who just smiled... with a little sadness inside.
You really made him fall for you, huh...Oikawa?
*
Oikawa had rushed out of the hospital and kept running for some more meters. He couldn't stop.
Breathing had been so difficult in that environment, the air was so thick. So heavy. It clenched his whole chest together, making him feel pain when inhaling too deep. The feeling of not getting enough oxygen.
Only after escaping that toxic surrounding it got better, and then his legs led him to the place he used to go when he felt lost and alone, he caught his breath again.
Arriving at the cemetery, Oikawa calmed down. Walking the small paths with soil and grass, he turned left and right, walked straight on and then paused.
Sitting down, his hands gripped the sides of his pants tightly.
Thank you, Hajime-kun.
Hajime-kun...
It replayed again and again like a endless loop inside his head.
That soft call, that kiss on the cheek... How and when had that damn Atsumu Miya and Iwaizumi gotten closer?!
If they called each other by their first names and kissed each other on the cheeks already, that would have meant only one thing...
“Tooru?” someone said.
There he was.
“Leave...me alone” Oikawa replied, while his voice got lower.
Of course...did he expect that he wouldn't be there? Because he was always there...
“Why are you so angry?” he was asked calmly.
“I...think I’ve made a big mistake...” Oikawa gave a wry smile.
“How come?”
Staying silent for a few minutes, the detective sighed and lowered his gaze.
“I opened up to Iwa...Iwaizumi. I shouldn’t have done so.”
“But you did.”
Oikawa stared at his opposite, then rested his head on his knees, pulling them close to his body.
“I should have quitted it before...I knew this would affect my work. I mean, look at me, Heiji. Look how pitiful I am now” Oikawa explained with a trembling voice, saddened, and a tear escaped his eye. It hurt. It hurt so much.
“You always think about your work and nothing else" Heiji talked back with a little smile, giving him all the obvious facts, Oikawa knew himself too.
"Think of yourself. Fight for what or...who you care for! And if it’s not worth it, if this Iwa-chan of yours is happy without you...shouldn’t you leave him living his life? After all, you were the one wishing him to date someone and be happy”
Oikawa’s eyes widened. That was right. He said that. Shaking his head slowly, while Heiji disappeared, he stared at the gravestone in front of him.
After all he had done...who was he to assume that Hajime would stay by his side as a friend? Assuming that he wouldn’t date someone else?
He stood up, stared at the memorial of his previous friend and partner, and then turned on his heels as to leave the cemetery.
His mind was still in a daze.
His heart was still heavy.
*
Iwaizumi had left Kuroo's laboratory and ran at his own again, wanting to grab his jacket and...stopped as he stared at Atsumu. Gosh...he had behaved so unreasonably and the detective's thoughtful and puzzled expression didn't make it better.
As soon as he thought about Oikawa...he had forgotten everything else around him. Everyone. Because his damn heart had taken the lead.
So there was the next one Iwaizumi would disappoint...
“I...I’m not sure if I can make it to lunch...” he admitted with an hoarse voice, clearly freaked out by the sudden change of events, and at a loss for words, “I...I just...”
Quickly looking around, he bit his bottom lip, searching for a good answer, but couldn't find one. Damn it.
“Hey, Hajime” Atsumu grabbed him by his shoulders, trying to calm him down a bit while stroking his shoulders gently with his hands, “What happened? You're freaked out?”
Maybe the question was needless. You could tell just by looking at Iwaizumi, just by knowing that Oikawa had been there. And even if he didn't know what kind of relationship the forensic doctor had with that asshole, he could see Oikawa was very important to him.
"I am. I’m...” Iwaizumi inhaled, trying to look the other in the eyes, and he felt how the metal of the ring pressed against his sternum, giving him the pressure to spill out the truth, “We had just made up. Just...were about getting to know each other a bit more and...I-I think, Tooru saw us...and...” He clenched his fists.
“Tooru?” Atsumu emphasised, surprised by Iwaizumi calling Oikawa by his given name.
“Do you...are you two...?” Miya asked, but didn't know how to put it without exploding, without getting frustrated over Oikawa again.
“What?! N-no...I...” Iwaizumi looked shocked, but it was different than being accused of something.
A little blush spread across his cheeks. He really had talent to make things worse, hadn't he? First Yui, then Tooru, and now he seemed to mess up with Atsumu and Tooru...Iwaizumi ran a hand through his hair.
“No...look...we...we had a bad start, we made this up and then I had...some kind of breakdown and he was there. We had a case, where we both could get killed and...gosh, he even made me talk about my own fucking flaws. He’s just some freaking idiot who can’t accept that people care for him and I think he finally did yesterday...he even apologised...and I was glad and...”
Stopping, he cut himself off, staring at some spot in the background.
That sounds...weird, as if...
“Look, I really don’t want to mess up with you or anything!!” he focused on Atsumu again, “I wouldn’t! I meant it, when I said the date we had was fun and that I wanted to do it again!”
Atsumu stared at him, emotionless, as the other explained everything, the feelings he held, his thoughts. All of that...seemed unreal to him. But he wouldn't give up.
Not on them, not on Hajime.
Finally, he was seriously interested in someone, and he wouldn't let anyone, especially not that jerk of Oikawa, take Hajime away from him.
“I understand...” Atsumu replied with a sad undertone.
“I’m sorry, Atsumu...I really am...”
God, Iwaizumi hadn't apologised so many times in his life before.
“I...can I...contact you, somehow?! I mean, with the cases and...everything. It may be easier?” he asked the detective.
He wanted to show him that he didn't lie and...seeing that sad smile...he wanted to do something about it. Even if it was just a little.
“Yeah, sure" the detective nodded irritated, "Of course, I'll write it down."
He looked around, getting a memo from the desk and a pen and did so, handing it over to Iwaizumi afterwards, “Just write a short message, I’ll reply or call as soon as I can, okay?”
"I will", Iwaizumi promised and after hestitating, he gave the other a short but firm hug, as he would leave now.
Atsumu hugged him back and, even if it was for only a brief moment, he allowed himself to inhalte his strong and infatuating scent. Just for that moment, he wanted to call him his own.
After Iwaizumi had left, Atsumi sighed, rubbing his neck and making his way out, but not without bumping in another familiar figure who came from the right.
“It’s nice to see you, Kuroo-san.”
Kuroo was startled by meeting that guy he didn't like as he was 'Team Oikawa, and had to put on a smile so he wouldn't show how annoyed he actually was.
“Detective Miya, it's such a pleasure to see you around here!” he replied ironically.
Instead of getting angry, Atsumu only chuckled and smirked about the new challenger in front of him and his not so pleased tone.
“Okay, stop with the small-talk. What are you doing here?” Kuroo got much more serious now and narrowed his eyes, "Or better to say: still here?"
The detective shrugged and lifted his chin a bit.
“I was asking Hajime-kun out, but that little jackass of your friend ruined it all.”
If he wanted to make his opposite angry, he was good at it. Clenching his fists, the smirk on Kuroo's face seemed even more forced now, and the heavy breathing told Atsumu that he wasn't so happy about the way he was talking about Oikawa at all.
“Oh, but wasn't Iwaizumi the one who just ran after Tooru now, leaving you here all alone?” the chemist teased back, stabbing right into the detective's heart.
“You clearly are the master of provocations uh, Kuroo-san?” Atsumu laughed, shooting a dead-glare at him.
“I am, but listen here" Kuroo took a step forward and almost hissed his next words, “If you hurt Iwaizumi or Oikawa, I’ll kick your ass twice.”
“Oh, that’s hot!” Atsumu said unimpressed, as he believed that barking dogs didn't bite at all, “But I can’t promise such a thing, especially for that asshole Oikawa!” he continued and passed him.
"Excuse me Kuroo-san, but I have stuff to do"
"Yeah, don't come back too soon. You're not welcomed anyway!" the other called after him, but only got a wave with the hand as an answer.
*
The forensic doctor rushed out of the hospital as Oikawa had before, and crossed ways with Akane who was just going to start with her work. Greeting her with a short 'mornin' and a little wave, she twirled around to the direction she had come from.
“Where are you heading to?” she called loudly, as he was already meters ahead.
“Emergency!" Iwaizumi shouted back with a look over his shoulder, "Wait for Akaashi, he will be there in any minute!"
Akane sighed and put her hands on her hips. Recently, he was so weird...
Of course, Iwaizumi didn't take notice of her reaction, as he took the stairs now to get to the exit, while he slammed the number Kuroo gave him into his phonebook, making it a shortcut so he could dial right away. But while he was doing so, he suddenly hesitated.
If Oikawa picked up the call...how should he begin?
Maybe the detective would just decline it?
And if so...he would switch off his phone for sure or block the number or whatever was necessary to get rid of a nagging forensic doctor.
Shit. He should look for another solution.
Standing outside, in front of the building, he opened the web browser and typed in two words.
Nakamura Heiji
Within seconds, the web spilled out reports and photos.
A portrait of Heiji when he was alive and worked as a police officer.
Photos of his funeral. The cemetery.
Iwaizumi knew the last one too well...really too well. He swallowed hard and pressed his lips together.
If there would be one place he could imagine Oikawa, despite being at Osamu's or his special place on the hill, it would be it.
At least it was a chance.
As it wasn't that far from there, the forensic doctor made his way quickly to the place. Still, he needed some time to find the grave itself.
Comparing the pictures he had found on the internet, he even got a bit lost between all the stones and the little arranged paths and bushes.
But when he finally found it, disappointment was the only thing he could feel: Tooru wasn't there.
Iwaizumi lowered his gaze. There were fresh foot prints in the soil: somebody had actually been here. He couldn't track them back as they would only lead to the middle alley, all stone flagged. His shoulders sank and he looked up to the stone with a stern and thoughtful expression.
Heiji died too young.
Although Iwaizumi didn't know Oikawa's birthday, he would suggest that they were about the same age. And so had been Heiji.
He turned his head to his right, and continued walking a bit, when he crossed ways with an elderly woman who was about taking care of one of the graves, having a shovel, a small rake and also a metal watering can standing next to her.
"Excuse me," he got closer, "Have you seen...a man around my age around? Tall, brown, curly hair, light coloured coat?”
The woman looked up and her forehead got more wrinkles as she lifted her eyebrows. Iwaizumi didn't expect anything, but her question in return made him almost jump.
“Ah, you mean Oikawa-kun?”
Is he so famous that even grannies know him?
His heart started pounding hard against his chest, hope arising from within and he felt a little relief.
“Well yes, he came today too. He's here too often for his age” she repied.
“Do you...know where did he head off?”
The woman thought a bit while straightening up.
“As usual he turned right, but we don’t know each other that well. We only talk sometimes. He's such a handsome and kind man. If only he wasn't so sad...” she gave Iwaizumi a gentle smile.
"Are you friends with Oikawa-kun, that you're looking for him? I've never heard anything about his friends."
"Y-Yeah... you can put it like that" the forensic doctor returned the smile bitterly, "We missed each other and uh...I have something urgent to discuss with him."
As she couldn't help him any further, they parted with a polite goodbye and he walked off.
So, if Oikawa wasn't there...he headed for the same direction the detective had chosen before. It led him to the second entrance of the cemetry and after he passed it, he got easily to the city centre within five minutes. And everything just became too familiar for him.
The streets, the buildings...and he found himself standing in front of Osamu’s.
Inhaling deeply and taking up his courage to face the missed one, Iwaizumi stepped over the threshold. Fortunately it was open, although it wasn't noon yet. But of course, Osamu was already preparing everything for the lunchtime, when salarymen and other workers or students would enter his little restaurant.
He carefully peeked in, noticing the chef behind the counter, frying something in a pan, as the rustling sound got to Iwaizumi's ears and also the smell of fried meat.
“Excuse me...” Iwaizumi approrached him, being greeted by Osamu's curious eyes and smile.
“Oh, Iwaizumi-san, we're not open yet, but if you want...” Osamu paused when he noticed Iwaizumi’s sadness and worry on his face, “...are you okay?”
Iwaizumi hesitated and didn't know how to put it without spilling out everything, but on the other side...if he really wanted to find Oikawa, maybe he had to open up to someone there.
“Actually, I hoped that Tooru would have been around. I-I mean Oikawa...” he corrected himself fast and rested his arms on the counter, with a long sigh.
It was done. He was done.
Of course, the chef had noticed the way he addressed the detective and Iwaizumi just averted the eye-contact when he got the glimpse of Osamu's ones, all widening because of that closeness-level Iwaizumi and Oikawa seemed to had.
“He hasn’t..." Osamu had to decline, "but...Iwaizumi-san, I know it’s not my business...still...did something happen between you two?”
Iwaizumi was a good man, and Osamu respected him. So seeing him that desperate and sad didn't suit him at all. It was so...off. So wrong.
“Or...did my brother do something?” he then added, suspicious, as he remembered Tsumu's interest in the forensic doctor, "I mean...no offense, but...he seems to have interest in you. To be said, he likes you a lot. And...you've been already on a date with him, right? So...I'm not taking his side, but why do you care so much for Oikawa?"
Iwaizumi's jaw dropped a bit. He knew that, he knew that Atsumu liked him, and Oikawa...
"Listen, if it’s Oikawa the one you want, then go ahead. It's okay. But I ask you not to hurt my brother. Don't hold him on line. The same goes the other way round, though.”
Nodding, the forensic doctor looked up and saw the compassionate expression on the other's face. He wasn't angry or anything. For Osamu, it might be difficult too. There was Atsumu, who was his brother, and Oikawa, who seemed to be a friend of his.
Exhaling with a little trembling, Iwaizumi started to fumble with his fingers nervously.
“I...I see your point...I really do and I don't wanna be cruel or anything...although I already am."
A wry smile covered his lips, "You know...in my whole life...I had relationships before. One lasted longer, the other two didn’t. I ended the first, and was dumped in the other two. They hadn't felt right. I wasn't really interested, they weren't neither. Caring for each other? Not enough. I hadn’t felt like it was something special. But now...I can't explain it right, but something changed."
The forensic doctor shook his head lightly and gave a little sigh. Putting his chin on his palm, he stared at an invisible spot on the wooden counter.
"Meeting Tooru was annoying. He’s a brat who needs a lot of attention, who needs to be constantly complimented. He gets angry too easily and he’s not used to apologise. It’s exhausting and extremely challenging, and there are so many locks I have to open. So many keys I need and I don’t know if I will ever get them.”
While talking his expression got more dreamlike, even though he seemed to rant about the detective. But...talking about Oikawa made Iwaizumi feel warm inside.
“Atsumu...he’s more than that just a cool guy . He’s interesting, his spirit is...catchy. He's so straightforward that it even gets me startled. He's...overwhelming in his presence, and I enjoyed it. I enjoy how the atmosphere crackles around us, I really do. I want to give him a chance, because...it’s...thrilling?! No...being with him...” Iwaizumi's eyes had caught some fire now but he paused for a moment.
"I felt guilty this morning. So guilty about having lunch together when I had stayed with Tooru last night. I even flinched because of a kiss on the cheek which had been okay yesterday...I...I don’t know what Tooru had done to me that I simply can’t get him out of my head...that I’m...searching for him so desperately...”
Cupping his face with his hands, he lowered his head. That was so fucking embarassing. How could anyone understand that?
But Osamu only smiled slightly, as he'd made his own conclusions by now.
“Then...I think you already have your answer” he said sincerely, “I know, Tsumu is a handful, and you wouldn't regret being with him. But...you don't talk the same way about him like you do with Oikawa. Think for a second, and I guess you'll know exactly who makes you happy. Don't be bothered by them, whether they can stand each other or not. If you have to decide, who you feel comfortable the most with...who is it?”
Who makes him happy, truly happy...
Iwaizumi's hand reached for the necklace and pulled it out. Staring at it, he let it go and pressed his lips together. He looked at the other guy and gave him a faint smile.
"Thank you, Osamu...I’ll go now. Trying to catch up with that stubborn smartass of a detective. He can’t be gone to the next universe, right?”
And therefore, Iwaizumi finally dared for the simplest but also the most difficult way: he took out his phone and dialed Oikawa's number.
*
Of course, getting a call was the last thing Oikawa wanted now. He was just wandering around Tokyo’s suburbs. When he was like this, he didn't like crowded surroundings, seeking for loneliness and silence. His eyes were still puffy and red: he had tried his best, but couldn't stop his tears flowing down his cheeks.
Sighing, he stared at the sky. The moment that he had finally managed opening up to someone...he was crushed. His feelings destroyed.
It hurt so much, and he fucking didn't like it. He was a detective after all! He should get a grip and move on!
But before Oikawa could make his decision real, his phone rang.
"Damn it, leave me alone..." he mumbled, not even wanting to pick it up.
After a few seconds the call ended. Finally.
Or so he thought, because he received a message thirty seconds after.
Sighing, he pulled it out.
Couldn't people live without him?
>>> Oikawa-san, here is Akane! Excuse me, I asked for your number - Kuroo-san gave it to me!
We have a new hint that the murder took place somewhere else and need to have your observation.
Please, let's meet up at the riverbend.
x Akane <<<
Oikawa's eyes widened in surprise.
Akane-chan...? It was strange for her, messaging him directly...why didn't she ask Kuroo to call him or send him a message instead?
Well, he could ask for further details later.
For now he would just get straight to the place Akane asked him to go to. Getting his mind occupied by that case would be a good alternative, instead of pondering and being depressed the whole day. Getting back to work had always helped him.
But...what if Iwaizumi was called there too?
He stopped for a second, then shook his head. No, this didn't matter. It shouldn't affect his job at all! They had to work together and he could just ignore him for the rest, right?
Oikawa didn't want to be angry at him. After all, Iwaizumi had listened to him, listened to his advice of dating someone else. Yeah...
Approaching the familiar surrounding of the riverbend, he noticed the man's back, bent down, busy with throwing stones into the water, making them hop two times before they sank.
He should have guessed it...
“What a coward, pretending to be someone else!" Oikawa announced himself bitterly, with hands in his pockets, getting closer, until he stood next to Iwaizumi with a polite two-meter-distance between them.
The forensic doctor looked up slowly, not being startled at all.
“I won’t deny it, but would you have even agreed to come, if I wrote my name?” he answered calmly, standing up, “I actually found something during the autopsy and it leads to that spot here" he explained, turning to face him.
"So...will you hear me out? Case related and not?"
Iwaizumi noticed the swollen eyes, his tired expression. He realised how exhausted Oikawa actually was.
How hurt.
It stabbed right into his heart.
Oikawa closed his eyes for a moment, before speaking up again.
“Tell me what you have found out about the case, then I’ll leave.”
Oikawa didn't even look at him, he only stared at the calm river flowing in front of him.
"Tell me at least why you won’t" Iwaizumi kept up with persistance, "Give me a reason...why you don’t hear people out? Have you already made up your conclusions? Or...is it because I hurt you?"
The doctor was going all straight-forward now, as it seemed he wouldn't get a chance at all.
“Why should I? It’s not my business. We’re just working on this case together, Iwaizumi. If you don’t have anything to tell me about the case, I’m off” Oikawa said, serious, and turned his back on him, walking away.
Iwaizumi...?!
The forensic doctor swallowed in annoyance, gritted his teeth and made large steps to reach him. He grabbed the detective by his hand and turned him around to face him.
“Fine, then I made my conclusions up here," he blurted, then continued.
"If it’s not your business, it’s strange how you suddenly call me by my last name. Wanna distance yourself from me? Got it! You brought coffee to Kuroo, so everything was okay in the morning. You can say nothing happened, but I don’t think so! Else you wouldn’t have cried, because your puffy eyes show me clearly enough! Your posture is bad and the way you avoid eye-contact with me proofs that you wouldn’t have come even if I said I would have waited until night and freeze my butt off. So, coming to my final conclusion,” he didn't stop, holding Oikawa's wrist firmly, “You’re upset and angry about what you saw and yeah, you have every right to be. So it clearly is your business and you'll hear me out! Or...I’ll throw you into water to clear your stubborn head!!!”
Every word was so emotional, so upset and filled with anxiousness. He wanted to get through him, to his heart that he had locked up again.
“Done?” Oikawa replied with a neutral tone, breaking himself free from Iwaizumi’s grip and staring to his left.
“Iwaizumi, it fucking doesn't matter to me who you date and kiss, okay? We’re just colleagues, nothing more.”
That damn...
"The hell I am done! Who’s the coward here, not even looking at me in the eyes? Denying that you lock yourself up again? Denying that it didn’t startle you at all, seeing Miya next to me?!"
Oikawa clenched his fists, being hit to the core, and then finally looked at Iwaizumi in the eyes. It made the forensic doctor shiver a bit, because that was an expression he had never seen on him before. Not if it was him who stood in front of Oikawa: pain, regret, more pain, sadness, more regret.
Was he even regretting the day...they had met?
“You want to know the truth? Okay, here it is!" the detective gave him a sarcastic smile, "You know what? I don’t care! You can date him and kiss him whenever you want! Get your hands busy with him, and I-don't-fucking-care, got it?"
Shouting before, Oikawa went quieter now but his voice sounded all tense: "I opened up to you, but don’t you worry, I won’t do the same mistake again. I just want to solve this damn case and then never cross your path ever again.”
Iwaizumi lifted his head, as if he was unimpressed and sighed.
"You know what..." the forensic doctor mumbled, still looking up, "Thanks for telling me. Now...time to clear your head!"
And with that, he suddenly dragged the detective by the arm, right to the shore. Oikawa couldn't even rebel against it, as he stumbled with him. Being pushed into the water now, he gasped at the sudden cold which wet his whole body. But Iwaizumi didn't stand by, he didn't mind the cold and came over, walking right into the water, to him, grabbing Oikawa's collar as he knelt down.
"Then I will cross your path again! Over and over, as much as it needs that you understand that I don’t let you go! That I don’t let the one who makes me unable to think of anything or anyone else go!!!" he yelled at Oikawa, who stared at him in disbelief.
Suddenly, the detective couldn't take it anymore. Tears started running down his cheeks, mixed with the river's water drops, falling down as he tried with all his might to push the other away from him. But the forensic doctor was stronger.
That didn't mean Iwaizumi wasn't shocked.
Shocked about the outburst. About those tears...
Feeling his heart breaking once more, as if he could feel a glimpse of Oikawa's pain. But that wasn't possible, was it?
"Shit..."
The urge to do something about it was too strong. He wanted to do something about those tears, his miserable state.
Iwaizumi leant in, crashing their lips together and pulling the other closer, right into his arms, holding him tight.
Oikawa hadn't even had the time to think or do anything. He just felt...shocked.
"I don't let you go...I can’t...!" Iwaizumi released Oikawa's lips and suddenly, all struggling, all trying to escape that hug, he held still.
“Please...leave me alone...I can’t...do this anymore...” Oikawa whispered, half-angry, half-desperate, as he didn't know what he should feel anymore.
Not even having the power to slap him, giving him a push or anything else for that kiss. That wet, cold kiss, that still tingled his skin.
Damn it, Iwaizumi Hajime...
"I won’t" the shorter male insisted, "Not when you’re crying. And even if you wouldn’t...I won’t.“
"I...I’m not crying...it’s just the water!"
Iwaizumi smirked a bit and caressed the other's wet back, leaning his head against Oikawa's, "I‘m sorry... I’m sorry that I put you through this,“ he continued, „And I’m an idiot if it comes to feelings and communication. So you know why I’m working in the morgue. No need to explain anything to lively beings.“ Faintly smiling, his fingers traced up the way to Oikawa's curls.
"I won’t ever leave you alone, if it’s not absolutely necessary... and that’s a pretty long time!“
If it was as easy as that... althought he should feel cold, he felt warm. Iwaizumi’s hug warmed his body. His presence. But his heart was still in pieces.
He could not trust him. He could not open up to him. Not when...
...you hurt me.
Why the hell was Iwaizumi hugging him now, saying all these sweet words to him...when he hadkissed Atsumu?! Even if it was on the cheek but a kiss was a kiss! Who knew how long they had already been dating!
So, was he enjoying hurting Oikawa? Like everyone else? Was he enjoying fooling with him, even if he was the smarter one?!
God...he hated feelings.
“Do you know...that it’s difficult for me too?” Iwaizumi whispered, “I don’t know...how a real relationship should be like. How it feels. I don’t know how it is to be happy in such a one. How to love.”
He gave a little sigh while holding the detective still close, “I tried and I failed. I tried again, and again. And then...then you suddenly crossed my path...and since then, I don’t know anything anymore!”
He chuckled helplessly, “I don’t understand myself. Not quite. I don’t understand why I wear your scarf, why I miss your scent. I don’t get why I can’t get you out of my head even though I tried to be more open to others and everything...I feel nothing but guilt and-"
He paused as he wanted to release Oikawa from his embrace a bit, to look him in the eye, but felt tied to him.
Oh...the necklaces were entangled.
His gaze lifted, meeting Oikawa’s chocolate brown eyes which had stared on the two rings first and then also at Iwaizumi who was in need of explanation now.
“I didn’t throw it away, obviously. I mean, I couldn’t and didn’t want to and...I didn’t want to lose it either, so..."
'Hey, I’m wearing that ring like your personal stalker' would have been the better senence as it mostly looked like it.
The forensic doctor lowered his gaze, getting prepared for anything which would come as a reply: a shout, a disgusted comment, anything. But Oikawa only had his surprised look on his face. So...Iwaizumi kept it and wore the ring every day?
“It looks like...we had the same idea”
“Yeah...seems so...just that you didn’t need to improvise with the necklace" Iwaizumi joked quietly with a faint smile, and looked at his own leather strap around his neck, holding the ring next to Oikawa’s.
Untangling them carefully, he was finally able to release the embrace, but only for a bit. He didn't want to let go totally.
“I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable...as it's weird that I’m wearing a ring which isn’t meant for me, right? But...for me there's a meaning..."
“What is...it?” Oikawa asked hesitantly, and Iwaizumi felt his pulse racing.
Although he felt the heat crawling up his cheeks, and although he tried to suppress the cold of the water, he still needed to put that internal warmth into courage - breathing out, breathing in. And it really surprised him that the following words came out confident and strong, but still so soft.
“This ring reminds me that I had your trust on that evening and that... I was able to be with you as something else than just the annoying forensic I am.”
Even if we faked it...
“It reminds me of you...a little bit of us..."
Oikawa blinked at his words, then lowered his gaze too, taking a step back and distancing himself from the forensic doctor.
“Why are you saying these things now?” Oikawa replied, clenching his fists, “You’re dating Miya Atsumu. You have to hug him, say those things to him...why me?”
And Iwaizumi’s heart only pounded hard and strong in his ears. For him, it was the first time he wanted to run. The first time he wanted to escape, to flee because the pressure was so strong. Every muscle started to tense, and he felt how much his breath started to tremble.
“Because...”
Say it...don’t ruin it!
“Because...”
Get a grip, Hajime!
And looking up again into Oikawa’s eyes, his heart just poured itself out.
“Because I’m such a stupid idiot who studied years about forensics, can analyse everything of a body, but isn’t able to figure out what’s going on inside of me!" he blurted, shrugging.
“I can’t say this to him, I can’t hug him like this now, because he’s not you! He’s not the one who makes me feel like an idiot, standing in a conbini, almost buying everything! An idiot who gets lost in your scent or lost his mind not because of my fucking trauma, but because I just didn’t get what everyone around me already had: that I like you!”
...
Okay, shit.
Iwaizumi stared at him in disbelief, because he couldn't even explain himself how easily the words had slipped his tongue. Now...he had said it.
“I met with him, yes, once” he continued, swallowing down a thick lump in his throat, “He followed me, annoyed me and caught my curiosity, yes. And that one time we met in private...it was nice, because he actually...I know that I attracted him. That he has interest in me. I felt safe for once about this stuff, about somebody wanting me...but where is the meaning of it if it’s just nice and if I just feel it’s not right ?! So...why should I say all these things to him? I may be an idiot...but I’m not a liar!"
Iwaizumi kept his eyes on the detective, speaking up so sincerely and throwing his arms in the air as he couldn't explain it better. He wasn't the only one who blushed now, because Oikawa couldn't stop blushing neither. Because it was a confession...right?
The detective stayed silent for a moment, thinking about what to say, because his mind got blown again.
Should he trust the man in front of him? Should he...give his heart to him?
“Heiji...died four years ago, you know?” Oikawa suddenly started with a sad smile and very quietly, “He died in front of my eyes...it was all my fault...I killed him by dragging him into that damn case.”
Why was he even telling Iwaizumi that? Maybe because his mouth couldn't stay locked up anymore.
“He wanted to propose...that day, he wanted to ask me to marry him! These rings...Heiji wanted to propose with these rings that day. All I did...was bringing him to death.”
Some tears swelled up in Tooru's eyes again. How many more could he cry? How much more did he have to cry? Was there ever an end?
“I don’t want to kill anybody else...I don’t want to kill you...you have to stay away from me or else...else...”
Iwaizumi felt the rising anxiousness of the detective, listened to his every word like he always did. Taking a deep breath, he reached carefully forward, coming closer againn and making sure not to move too fast. There was that big vulnerability of Oikawa that had shown up from under the surface.
He didn't want to see him dying...snd he clearly thought that all of the events in his past were his fault. His own nemesis.
It was the reason why he didn't allow himself to be happy.
"You won’t," Iwaizumi whispered, "What happened back then...it'll always be a wound. I understand that, even...if I didn’t drag someone in a case. But I couldn’t prevent my mom's suicide either, although I saw the signs."
And he quickly added: "I don’t wanna compare that to each other, of course, just...I understand that you’re scared of making mistakes again."
He took another step forward, less than a meter away from him.
"And I won’t talk you out of that because I can’t. Still, I wanna help you to overcome. To get up again. I want to be by your side and support you. Not out of pity. I want to do this..." Iwaizum paused when he was standing just close enough to cup Oikawa's face with his hands, "...because I can’t stand to see you crying. Because I want to see that lovely smile again. Because you deserve feeling better again..."
Oikawa’s tears moistened Iwaizumi’s hands, as he stared at him, still scared but also enchanted by his words and actions.
Why...was Hajime so caring?
Why wasn’t he scared of Oikawa's past, disgusted by him and his insecurities?!
“And you...deserve a much better person than me...” the detective whispered, as their noses were millimeters apart.
“I refuse" the forensic doctor talked back with a wry smile and wiped off the flowing tears with his thumbs, tapping Oikawa's nose tip with his own,.
“Everyone has his flaws...that’s normal. That’s human. And I can’t promise that I won’t hurt you, because that’s also normal. But what I can promise is that I won’t do this on purpose and that I stand up for that, and make it better.”
Feeling Oikawa's breath on his skin, Iwaizumi looked him in the eye, getting slightly distracted by those trembling lips. Oikawa put his hand above Iwaizumi's right one, holding it tightly and tilting his head to the side. Feeling it more and enjoying it for a second. That warm and strong hand.
“You...are such a softie, Iwaizumi Hajime."
“Sorry for not being my usual brute self” the shorter male muttered and couldn't help but feeling a slight relief under the touch, as it was a sign that he hadn't screwed it up. Oikawa accepted it at least. Hearing his name again, coming from the other's mouth, gave him chills.
Now, he really leant his forehead against Oikawa's, lowering his gaze for a moment, and Oikawa leant in too, closing his eyes. Lulled by Iwaizumi's scent and his hot breath on his skin, by their noses that brushed softly against each other and...after a quick look, he noticed that he wasn't the only one who felt a little change.
Iwaizumi tilted his head more, in a perfect angle, then he overcame the last millimeters. And this time he put his lips much gentler on Oikawa's.
So warm...so soft...such a fine taste.
Oikawa hadn't expected that Iwaizumi's lips would be so...delicate. He melted in that kiss, resting his hands on the forensic doctor's chest the moment he was pulled against his body.
Assaporating those lips, just giving in to the feelings he had repressed until now, another tear escaped his eyes.
But it wasn't out of sadness, more out of relief, that he was finally free. That his heart started to beat out of emotion again.
He relaxed in Iwaizumi's arms, his stiff shoulders losened up and his chest didn't feel so tight when he inhaled. Iwaizumi explored every single millimetre of that perfect mouth on his, cherishing every second, as Oikawa sucked gently on his bottom lip.
Iwaizumi opened his eyes again as they ran out of air. Still a little dizzy, he noticed the tear running down Oikawa's cheek and he just kissed it quickly away, looking at him in his brown eyes before he lowered his head to bury his nose right into the crook of the other's neck.
“You...made me so fall for you...” he whispered, “...and I got so addicted to your scent...addicted to you...” he murmured, a little embarrassed but also drained in endorphines.
“I’ve...fallen for you the moment I saw through you” Oikawa replied quietly, stroking through the wet dark strands of spiky hair, which was so much softer than it looked like, “For the person you are. The person you are with me, your smile and...”
He took Iwaizumi's hand in his and left a gentle kiss on the knuckles, “Your hands that intertwine so well with mine, Hajime...”
Iwaizumi released himself a bit, when Oikawa began to speak. Just enough, so he could take a glimpse at him and didn't miss that beautiful smile of his or anything of the beautiful man Tooru was.
And he even blushed a bit, as Oikawa said things about him that Iwaizumi hadn't been aware of himself.
He never felt so special. Not like that...
Gosh, why his heart was about to burst?
Especially...hearing only his given name reddened his cheeks much more and the strong pumping heart in his chest jumped up and down.
Just as Oikawa's one did, everytime when Iwaizumi spoke to him or touched him.
Tooru had known about his feelings for quite a while now, but never said anything because he didn't want Iwaizumi to be disgusted by him or to ruin his life. He thought there wouldn't have been any chance that the other would ever reciprocrate his love. But now...he had kissed him. He was holding him so tight, holding his hands, making him feel so...loved. So right.
But as much as they were caught in the moment and hoped that it would never end, the cold began to make itself present and a cool shiver ran down Iwaizumi's spine.
“Tooru...maybe...I don’t wanna put an end here, but maybe we should get rid of the wet clothes?"
Receiving a surprised expression by the detective, the forensic doctor noticed how misleading his words were.
"I-I mean, I live only ten to fifteen minutes from here. Let me offer you a hot shower and some clothes?!”
With a little smirk, Oikawa nodded, accepting Hajime’s offer. Together, they walked back to the main street, still holding hands. And although they fastened their pace because the wind blew through their drenched fabrics, they couldn't stop grinning nor wiping off the big smile on their face that showed everyone how much love they felt.
Eventually, when they were waiting for the elevator in the apartment building, Iwaizumi got a bit impatient, shifting from one foot to another. His body had started shivering. He side-glanced to Oikawa who seemed to be fine, but the detective's lips were a bit purple too.
Pushing the button multiple time, Iwaizumi held the detective close to him again, without saying anything, as the elevator moved slowly.
"It’s not the fastest..." he mumbled.
“It's good that it isn't, so I can stay in your arms a little longer...” Oikawa replied almost inaudibly, chuckling.
Such a beautiful little sound, Hajime could listen to it all day.
Smiling, he hugged Tooru tightly, and leant with his back on the wall. He shoved his hands under the detective's coat, resting his hands on Oikawa's waist, and felt how cold the other's body was.
"You must be freezing" he automatically began rubbing Tooru's back, to make him feel warmer, "Guess I was the most stubborn one here, pushing you into the river..."
As they parted with the Pling sound of the elevator, Iwaizumi took his hand and walked off. He noticed Oikawa's cute red cheeks while they reached his door.
The forensic doctor smirked a bit, walking straight to his apartment and opening the door quickly with his key.
"Come in and feel yourself at home" he already kicked his shoes off, "Bathroom is right next to you, I’ll bring you some towels and clothes."
Taking off his drenched wet jacket, he was already helping Oikawa out of his coat. Hajime was such a gentleman.
“You...are freezing too. Take a shower first, I’ll wait” the brunette said, while some drops of water fell from his drenched hair, making him look even cuter.
Throwing a back over his shoulder, Iwaizumi got a little startled by that: how could that man be so damn cute when he was so damn hot on the other side too?!
"No way~" he hummed on his way and then headed to the bedroom, looking for the promised towels and changings. Returning to his guest, he handed him everything and then just leant in to kiss the corner of his Tooru's mouth.
"So, shower. Now" Hajime whispered and distanced himself then again, "I'll just dry myself first. Don’t worry!"
Iwaizumi turned his back to him and began undressing, pulling the soaked shirt over his head, while walking up to the bedroom again. Oikawa became red from head to toe.
No wonder, as he was staring at that perfect toned back of the forensic doctor, who had just kissed him again in a teasing manner, and walked away, leaving him like that.
Before he might lose more than his shirt, Oikawa entered the bathroom quickly. Maybe a good shower would bring him back to some senses.
He jumped into the shower, threw his wet clothes on the tiled floor, and let the warm water flow down his whole body, warming him up again.
It felt relaxing, it felt...like home, even if it was Iwa-chan’s.
It was like...he belonged to that place somehow.
He belonged to him.
Iwaizumi had just dried himself and put on new underwear and sweatpants, as he paused for a minute and looked at the improvised necklace with the ring on it. A small smile came up, and he kissed the ring carefully.
So...this was what love felt like?
That warmth? That...happiness?
He heard the shower's tingling of the purling sound and sat down on his bed.
That....isn’t a dream, right?
Just remembering the last half an hour, remembering what happened...no, it wasn't a dream.
Tooru was there...in his bathroom and...they kissed. Really kissed. He chuckled lightly, went all red and ran a hand through his hair. Giving a light sigh of relief, he fell backwards and cupped his face for a moment before he dared to look up at the ceiling again.
"I’m so....in love with him and didn’t notice at all..."
Oikawa finished his shower and tied a towel around his waist, hanging the other around the shoulders. He left the bathroom, but didn't see Iwaizumi anywhere.
“Iwa-chan...?” he called quietly. It wasn't his home so he couldn't just walk around adn peek everywhere.
“Hajime?” he raised his voice, searching for him.
"Bedroom."
But before Oikawa could enter, Iwaizumi had stood up again, put on a simple white t-shirt and came out of the room, so they met in the corridor, "So? Do you feel any-"
He stopped abruptly, staring at the other for a second. Tooru's still wet hair that was stroke back, his beautiful face, that more than handsome stature of his, the well defined chest and abs. And...
Don’t stare so intensely, you idiot!
He got himself distracted too much by the flared hip bones.
“Feeling warmer now?” Iwaizumi got out with a strained smile.
Look him in the eye, nowhere else!
Oikawa had stared at him too, as he was stared on first. Looking aside, blushing and covering his upper body as nonchalantly as possible with the towel on his shoulder, acting like he had to dry that part of his torso, he had to clear his throat more.
What if Iwaizumi was staring at him, because he was...well, not attractive? Maybe his body sucked...? His own muscles were not so defined like Iwaizumi's ones, after all...
Yeah, Oikawa was insecure about himself. More than he would ever allow to show.
“Yes, better. Go and take a shower too, or you’ll catch a cold” the detective mumbled and didn't see how the shorter male nodded oddly multiple times.
“Y-Yeah... I... I will.”
But when Iwaizumi dared to look up again, he noticed that Oikawa somehow felt embarrassed. He just apologised for making him feel uncomfortable, rubbed his neck, and was about stepping into the bathroom...but stopped in front of the man he was in love with.
It cost him seconds to gain courage, to get his heart calmer again. He rested his lightly trembling hand on Tooru's side and leant to his ear.
"You’re...way too beautiful...” he whispered as red as a tomato now, and stepped quickly forward.
So that was what love felt like?
Being embarrassed, blushing, not being able to keep one's composure...?
Oikawa blushed madly, covering his face with both hands, as Iwaizumi left the room. He didn't feel warm anymore...he felt hot. Burning.
Changing into the clothes, he was wearing Iwaizumi's sweater and some pants. Whereas the pants were a bit short, the shirt was just a bit to wide because of their different body shapes.
He sat down on the bed in the bedroom, unsure what to do while waiting for his...what was Hajime to him now? A colleague, a friend or...a lover?
Oikawa's eyes wandered off and he suddenly focused on an old photoframe on the nightstand.
A little Hajime with...his mom?
Having a closer look at the photo, Oikawa could only smile sadly: Hajime was so cute and so...happy there. He was now too, but it was such a different smile than the one he showed everyday...
Could Oikawa possibly make him that happy again? Could he give him all the love Iwaizumi deserved?
He surely wanted to try...
Standing under the shower, Iwaizumi had totally different problems: trying to calm down. In many ways.
Seeing Tooru like that...half-naked...it wasn't only beautiful. It was...infatuating.
He had felt his blood rushing downwards immediately and because of that he even had to switch the water on cold for a few seconds.
Damn it...he had never felt like that for a man before. He had never been turned on by another man's body.
And he had never thought that...
He's so perfect.
Yeah, of course Iwaizumi knew that Oikawa wasn't. Nobody was. But for him...for him he was more than that.
Finally being able to reveal his feelings, to accept them, to see them coming up to the surface...it was amazing. The little blushes, the cute smiles, those sparkling eyes...
Trying to let his thoughts flow, he finished showering, feeling much better and wrapping himself in a towel.
Drying, he put his favourite hoodie over his shirt - one of the more comfortable with Godzilla on it - and wore the boxershorts and sweatpants too. He got out with the warm water steam behind him, rubbing his wet hair with the towel.
Returning to the bedroom, his eyes found Oikawa leaning in to the nightstand where the photoframe was. Oh...
"That was on Mother’s Day" Iwaizumi made himself noticeable and had a soft, nostalgic smile on his face, "I invited her to her favourite ice cream parlour and had saved my pocket money for that."
He looked at Oikawa, who felt caught red handed and jumped because of Iwaizumi's sudden apperance.
“I’m sorry, I just...my gaze landed there...” Tooruapologized, stuttering a bit and lowering his gaze.
"Don't you worry. No need to feel sorry" Iwaizumi reassured him and offered him to have a hot drink to warm up from inside too.
Oikawa's eyes started sparkling as he hadn't eaten or drunk much since last night, when they had their conbini dinner together.
“Yes...it would be nice!” he smiled like a kid.
“Then...give me five minutes” Iwaizumi said, “As I said...make yourself feel at home. There’s no need to feel sorry about anything you see here.”
Going into the kitchen, he reached for a package on the shelf and opened the refrigerator. He took out a bottle of milk, pouring it into a pot.
Switching in the stove, Iwaizumi needed the promised five minutes and finally came back with a big smirk on his face and two steaming mugs.
“Here you are. Careful...it’s still hot.”
Sitting down next to Oikawa, he handed him the hot chocolate.
His favourite drink.
Oikawa expression enlightened, as he took the cup.
“You...remembered this too...” he mumbled, as he took a careful sip. It was simply delicious.
That morning, Oikawa would have drank hot chocolate with Iwa-chan, if it wasn’t for...well, Miya Atsumu and his own overreaction towards the situation. Yes, Oikawa could've reacted otherwise, but he hadn't had himself under control at all.
Because he loved Hajime, because he couldn’t stand losing him. Because he wanted him by his side.
“I thought...you liked coffee?” he then asked curiously, because Iwaizumi hadn't touched his own drink, only holding it.
Hajime laughed quietly now, as he had only wanted to watch Oikawa drinking his chocolate so happily.
“I do, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like chocolate," the forensic doctor replied, taking a sip on his own, "It just doesn’t help me staying awake and I prefer the special one here, selfmade.”
Chuckling lightly again, Iwaizumi asked with some kind of hesitation: “Wanna hear...why it’s so special?" He looked up and added quickly, “I don’t wanna bore you with such trivial stuff, so eh...just say so, if you don’t!”
“How could something bother me, if it’s Iwa-chan who tells me?”
Iwaizumi looked at him a bit surprised and then all he could do was smiling gently.
That man...that incredible, handsome, cute man...
“Okay...” lowering his gaze, he glanced to the photo, “When I was a kid and sick or just didn’t feel well, my mom often made hot chocolate. The sweet taste always made me feel much better. And I asked her why it was so. She said that she always put a magical ingredient inside."
Oikawa listened to him as promised, but also with anticipation, curious to hear from the world little Hajime had lived in. The shorter male looked into his mug, as he went on.
“I wanted to do it on my own too, and so she showed me. Today, I wanted to do the same. Do you know what’s the most important thing about making it? The most important ingredient? The magic?” Looking up into Oikawa's eyes, Iwaizumi gave a little smirk but held his gaze with a very warm expression.
Shaking his head, Oikawa didn't know.
“Sugar?” he tried, like if it was the most natural thing of the world. Everyone knows that sugar makes everything better! But it was wrong, as the forensic doctor's expression changed to an amused one.
“That...had actually been my answer back then” he admittted, "Try again. I give you a hint: I used it too. And you don’t use it consciously, most of the time.”
"You're really challenging Japan's best detective with some riddles?" Oikawa joked with crossed arms, but his brain had already taken on that challenge.
So he closed his eyes, thinking.
Come on, Tooru! Think! You solved plenty of impossible cases and you can’t solve this stupid riddle?! Show him how amazing you are!
But he couldn't.
Something you don't use consciously, uh...? Was that the brain? Nope, people use it consciously...most of the time.
Then...uhm...
“I know!! It’s special because you made it with your hands so the answer is hands!!” the detective exclaimed almost jumping up from bed, looking into the other’s eyes with excitement.
"Close. Very close" Iwaizumi drank in silence. It was amazing to observe Oikawa while he was on work. How the synapses connected, finding a solution.
And his smirk became a smile of acknowledgment.
“You’re...amazing..." he spilled out quietly, "You know how amazing you are?”
Taking the mug out of Oikawa's hand, he put it and his own on the nightstand.
“But...I have to disappoint you. It was only half-true.”
Oikawa pouted, as he was disappointed that he got it wrong as a detective and that his mug was even being taken away!
He then held still, when Iwaizumi reached for that little curl next to Oikawa's ear with his fingertips, brushing it back.
"It’s much more cheesy...still wanna know?” Hajime whispered.
“What...is it then?”
Leaning in, the forensic doctor looked at him with pure endearment and took Tooru's hand, bringing it up to his chest and leaving it rest there.
“Got the clue?” he asked, referring to his heartbeat which was to be felt, “You’re right that it’s special because I made it myself, but moreover...because while you’re doing this, you think of the person you make this for. And you put all your effort in.”
That’s what his mom had told him.
“That’s the reason why it'll always be special and taste better. That's why I can’t stand the ones from the vending machines.”
Tooru looked at him, puzzled and surprised. Yeah...he felt it. Iwaizumi's steady heartbeat. And his own started to beat in the same rhythm, adapting.
They were sharing the same feeling, after all. They were connected.
So he did it vice versa and took Iwaizumi's hand, letting it rest on his chest too.
“Do you feel it? My heart...beating so fast for you?” Tooru added with a sweet smile. That wonderful smile.
And his warm eyes with that soft sparkle reminded Hajime of the miraculous starry sky he was able to see at his favourite spot.
“Yeah” the forensic doctor replied with a cute smirk, “and...I’m...”
He what?
“I’m a loss of words” Hajime admitted, laughing again, lowering his head for a moment.
"Tooru...can I...kiss you? For the next five or ten minutes?"
Oikawa smiled at that question in slight amusement and he cupped Iwaizumi's cheeks, when he leaned in to give him just a quick peck on the lips, but with all the love that he felt for him. Their noses touched again, and he looked straight in those olive-green eyes.
“You don’t really have to ask, Hajime."
Chapter 12: Scars
Summary:
“The most obvious one was that you almost murdered me with that scalpel, because your mind was filled with thoughts about Oikawa-san. Second, Kuroo-san also mentioned that you were so blind of your own feelings whereas everyone else could see that. I have to agree to it. Third, you were overly obsessed with that scarf and whereas you throw your jacket in a corner, you put the scarf neatly on your desk and sometimes sniffle-"
“That’s enough! Thank you!” Iwaizumi interrupted him very quickly.
“I won’t mind taking Akaashi-kun as my assistant” Oikawa commented.
“But Iwa-chan...you really sniffled my scarf?! What are you, a dog?!”
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
“You don’t really have to ask, Hajime."
Iwaizumi blinked when he received a quick peck on his lips, getting teased, but he still felt how much love came from the man in front of him.
He looked into his eyes, blushing a bit when their noses touched again.
“Good...because...it’s hard not to kiss you at all” Iwaizumi murmured and overcame the last millimetres of distance between them to find himself melting away as soon as his lips met the detective one's.
He wrapped his arm around the other male, pulling him closer, in need of feeling as much as possible of him.
Oikawa tried to keep up with Iwaizumi's pace: the way he was kissing him was just more passionate and faster now, but he didn't feel overwhelmed by it. God, he didn't know that he needed those man's lips so bad...Hajime's lips, his touch, just...Hajime himself, until he had felt him.
Caressing Iwaizumi's cheeks, his hands wandered off to the spiky black hair. Running through it, his fingers clenched around the short strands softly.
It felt like they had known each other already for years.
Every single touch, every little breath against his skin made fireworks explode within him, leaving sparks of pure happiness. His heart had never felt so at ease...so...satisfied.
And Hajime didn't love it less, how Tooru's finger touched his hair, how his lips moved with his own and loved it how - yeah...how it feels to love - and that felt so damn right, so good.
He leant in more, shifting his weight carefully on Oikawa so they fell backwards.
And it wasn't that he wanted to rush things, but Iwaizumi wanted to wrap him with so much more comfort and affection. As he wanted to feel everything with him.
He looked into the chocolate-brown irises, daring to ask for a slow dance with the tip of his tongue, stroking it gently over Oikawa's bottom lip. It was so much more the forensic doctor could have ever wished for.
Holding his love safely by his waist, lightly caressing the tiny bare spot of naked skin, Iwaizumi's whole perception was only focused on him. His whole mind, his whole heart, all focused on Tooru.
“You taste like...sweet chocolate...” Hajime murmured with a smile, as they parted to breathe again.
“You too, we just drank one Iwa-chan!" Oikawa chuckled.
They were resting on the bed now, holding each other warm and tight.
Tooru couldn't believe that this whole scenery was real. That this was really happening.
In these last four years, he'd only blamed himself. He had felt like a murderer, helpless and alone. Nobody who would understand him.
The only one who did, had died because of him. And so he hadn't been able to open up to anyone. By living in his cage, he could at least pay for his mistakes...
But now, all had changed. There was a light in his life. A sparkling light that made him hope for the better, that made him feel like a good person.
Iwaizumi Hajime saved him from his misery.
“Hm...not sure if it’s just because of that” the forensic doctor said with a little chuckle, lowering his head, shifting himself downwards until he was able to rest on Oikawa's chest. Listening to his steady heartbeat, “Guess...that pick-up line was somehow lame.”
Straightening up then, he rolled over to the side, supporting himself on his elbow and put his head in his hand so he could look at the other next to him. He let his fingertips draw invisible ornaments on the other’s pectorals, up to his neck and jawbone. To his lips...
“I don’t know if it’s the same for you...but I feel freakin' high somehow” Iwaizumi whispered with his love drunk smile, “Better than any amphetamine could be...and tasting like chocolate. Good combination!” he joked.
“You have to give the recipe to Makki, he would make some good drug out of it!” Oikawa teased him and laughed as he had never felt that happy before.
“Never. That will be our secret" Iwaizumi shook his head and then got more sincere.
“Tooru...thanks for showing up in my life. Really...thanks for being with me."
The detective went quiet, staring at him for a moment. Hajime...his Hajime. It was his turn now to show his gratitude.
“Thank you... for pulling me out of the darkness in which I was imprisoned..."
Taking Oikawa's hand into his, Iwaizumi kissed his fingers gently, before he spoke up once more.
“More than welcome. Whenever something is occupying you, whenever there's something you’re afraid of or...if negativity crawls up...tell me. Don’t hesitate, don’t be scared and tell me, Tooru.”
“You’re actually the only one who listens to me. Well...” Oikawa gave a wry smile and thought about Heiji’s figure, which appeared every time he visited him at the cemetery, but it wasn't the same. Speaking to a dead person wasn't the same like talking to Iwaizumi.
“I mean it, I’ll be there. I'll hear you out" Iwaizumi promised and leaned in, brushing Oikawa's lips with his.
“Speaking about that...I’ve never thanked you for listening to me. Back in the hospital," the thought just crossed the doctor’s mind, "It...was the first time I told someone about my family and...well, it’s not so bad. Talking about my mom, I mean. I've always been scared of that. So, thank you, Tooru..."
Oikawa stared at him, saddened because Hajime must have suffered as much as him, and all he had done was dramatising his own past. That he was the only one hurt here. That nobody had gone through something similiar like he had.
And that made him feel so guilty. He felt bad about the fact that he had hurt Iwaizumi. That he would have continued to do so, if he hadn’t been thrown into that goddamn cold river. That he...would have lost him forever.
“I’m sorry...” the detective said quietly, hiding his face into Iwaizumi's chest, “I’m...so sorry...I know I’m a piece of shit...a horrible person...” some tears flew down his cheeks, “I hurt you...and I really don’t deserve all of this. I don't deserve you."
"T-Tooru...?!”
Wrapping his arms immediately around the other, Iwaizumi gave a muted sigh.
"You’re not. You’re absolutely not...I can’t even imagine how it must have been for you..." he murmured and tried to calm Oikawa down, stroking his back in reassuring circles. Pushing him then gently away so he could face him, he went on.
"Tooru, you have to stop it. You deserve all of this. And I won’t let you think otherwise. If I have to prove it to you, I’ll do it. You may seem like a high-functional genius, sometimes a sassy mouth and speaking arrogantly..."
Oikawa's surprised expression changed to a pouting one, as he obviously didn't like those words, but he stayed silent.
"But most of all - for me - you’re just Tooru. You will hurt me, I’ll hurt you, we can’t avoid it. But it’s nothing we can't overcome. Tooru...you’re so far from horrible. You can’t be or I wouldn’t have fallen for you, if you were. I wouldn’t be...so...in love with you..." He finally said it. "I’m...helplessly in love with you."
And his smile became brighter, almost a carefree laughter, as his olive-green eyes were already sparkling.
"I love you, Tooru. So stop the crying and bear with me.”
Oikawa’s eyes widened as he listened to his words. The smile he was wearing on his lips, his happy eyes that held the emotions he accepted to feel.
“I love you so much, Hajime...” Oikawa could only reply in a whisper, and kissed him softly. A tear escaping his eye again, but this time it was because of happiness.
I love you, Hajime...
He had heard those words before, but Iwaizumi had always been sure that the girls hadn't meant it in the way it was supposed to. With Tooru, it was different. He could feel it. With every syllable, every breath.
But as magnificant this moment was - so pure, so beautiful - Iwaizumi ended it with a blast: without warning him, he let his hands wander over Oikawa's body, searching for weak spots to tickle. The waist, the chest, the stomach... and as it was not enough, he even nibbled on Tooru’s neck; not given him one chance to escape.
Of course, Oikawa had to laugh hard and was joined just a little bit after by the forensic doctor.
“H-Hajime...please I...” he tried, but Iwaizumi was merciless, “Please...! I won’t...I won’t cry anymore!!"
“Oh you will cry, because I make you laugh much more!"
"Haji, please!!” Oikawa broke in between his laughters. God... he was feeling so...good, right now.
So full of good feelings he had never felt before. So happy, so...relieved and loved.
However, Iwaizumi actually did stop.
“H-how did you call me!?”
Oikawa opened his eyes again, staring up to him and got an irritated look in return, too. The detective's eyes widened. He lowered his hands from Iwaizumi's chest, putting them down on the mattress and lowered his gaze, too.
“I’m sorry I...I didn’t mean to...” Oikawa whispered, trying not to ruin the atmosphere between them.
The happiness of love.
“N-no... a-a-actually....” Iwaizumi stammered. Why was he stammering!!
And what was it with this red, this heat, which crawled up from his feet to his cheeks. Damn it...
He got so red, that he swallowed hard and avoided even eye-contact for a second.
“...can you...say that again?” the forensic docto muttered, absolutely flustered and unable to speak louder, “This...was...very cute...”
And he looked up, almost cautiously. And oh...how hard he blushed!!
He liked it.
He...really liked these nicknames, Tooru gavehim.
Oikawa was surprised, but also relieved. So it was not nothing worse...?
His usual smirk came back, as he put his hands then on Iwaizumi's neck and cheek.
“Haji...” he said, kissing the other's forehead, then looking him back in the eyes.
“Haji...” Now he kissed his cheek.
And he continued to repeat his name, kissed his other cheek, his nose, his chin, everything.
But there was one part he left for the dessert.
“I love you, Haji...so much, I can’t even explain it right...”
Iwaizumi was only able to give a quiet “Tooru”, as the latter lowered his gaze to Iwaizumi’s lips, he got their lips together again, kissing him with all his love.
Iwaizumi felt, how endless shivers were sent up and down his spine, when he heard his name over and over.
When Tooru kissed him so soft. When he felt the touch of his fingertips.
So warm...so complete.
And his heart beated so rapidly and strong against his chest...just by these words thet kept echoing in his head. A quiet moan left his throat, as he was enjoying every second.
Getting caught by that infatuation, intensifying the kiss and continuing to move his fingertips, he caressed the revealed skin beneath the sweater, right on height of Tooru’s waist. A soft moan came out of Tooru’s mouth when he felt Hajime's tongue and his own dancing together, exploring each other sweetly but passionately.
The detective was already so addicted to him, that he realised the contact of his skin with Hajime's just a few seconds later. He had never had such an intimate moment with anyone before, hadn't kissed, hadn't done...anything. He blushed madly as he was so caught in the moment, now clenching his fingers around the spiky strands of Iwaizumi's hair.
Iwaizumi swallowed, forced himself to slow down, when he noticed how he got Tooru into a hurrican of emotions. As much as he was eager about exploring the man in front of him, about feeling so much more of him, it was as good as it was now. They didn't have to rush.
So he released his tongue from Tooru's, looking at him in the eyes for a moment, and lowered his head again. Kissing the corner of Tooru's lips then, kissing his cheek, continuing with reaching for his jawbone, and then the soft spot under his earlobe.
There he could inhale the scent he loved so much. Hajime nibbled softly on the skin, tracing down a little bit more. That was nothing like the make outs he had in his previous relationships. Never had he felt the urge to give someone everything. To give his partner all his love...now it was different.
He wanted to make him feel good. Make him feel loved. He wanted to show how much he cared, how much he was obsessed with him...
God...why was it so hard to hold himself back, now?
Fortunately, Oikawa didn't feel uncomfortable at all. He let himself being cuddled by other male, let himself being lulled in his touches and kisses, and therefore...because of the warmth. Because of that cosy atmosphere between them, he fell asleep. He didn't know when was the last time he could so, but Hajime’s arms were so much safer, so much like home.
Suddenly hearing the more and more calmer breathing of the detective, Iwaizumi lifted slowly his head, looked at Oikawa and...had to grin.
“I’m kissing you with so much longing and you fell asleep?” he chuckled and gave a sigh.
Laying down with him, he snuggled up and pulled the blanket over their bodies, holding Oikawa's hand.
Maybe for one hour, maybe more...they needed a break.
*
Iwaizumi tried to ignore his phone's ringing, mistakening it for the alarm clock in his own sleepy state. He gave a quiet snarl and hid himself more with his nose into the other male's neck.
“Mhm...” Oikawa muttered too, irritated by that sound which announced urgency.
And because the noise didn't break off, he slowly lifted his eyelids a little. Just enough to notice Iwaizumi besides him, embracing him with his strong arms. Wait...was it morning? The sun shone into the apartment in a bright yellow-orange colour. Was it morning or evening? Tilting his head to the other side, to the window, he still wasn't sure as the curtains were closed.
His mind replayed the last events: the water, the confession, the hot chocolate, the kissing...and it was real.
“Haji...” he muttered again with his sleepy voice.
“Not yet...” Iwaizumi mumbled back, hugging him even more. But when the ringing didn't end, he stretched his arm out to his backside, catching the phone, but shove it just down the nightstand to the floor with his flat palm.
“Ah...fuck...”
Untangling from Tooru, he let himself hanging out of bed with his upper body, picking up the device and the call while scratching his neck.
“Hello?”
He hadn't even looked at the display, but was more than awake when he heard...Atsumu’s voice.
“Hajime-kun, I’m sorry...maybe I disturbed you” Atsumu apologised when he noticed how tired the forensic doctor sounded.
Gulping and still hanging half-out of bed, he sat up again, paying more attention now, as Oikawa knitting his eyebrows next to him.
“N-no...no that’s not it" Iwaizumi replied quickly, daring to look at his alarm clock, "It’s already...holy shit? It’s almost nine?!”
He turned to Tooru, while holding the device on his ear. Have they overslept?
God...how exhausted they must have been that they slept from early evening until now!
But besides this, Iwaizumi's expression became more serious, looking at the brunette who gave him a puzzled expression in return- why was he staring at him like that?
“Listen, I’d like to meet up. I have something to tell you...”
He remembered Osamu's words and he didn't want to be a liar, so...
“Okay?” Atsumu gave back, confused about the serious tone, “So...I’ll be at the morgue in an hour, is that okay for you?”
“Yeah...yeah, it is” Iwaizumi tried to hide the upcoming sigh but couldn't at all, “Sorry about...making this morning already awkward. What...was it that you called me for, anyway?"
"Nevermind" Atsumu shook it off, "I can tell you later, okay?"
They hung up.
That would be hard, telling him... Iwaizumi rubbed his head as he put the phone back on the nightstand again.
“Mhm...Haji...was it Daichi...? Does he need us?”
Of course, Oikawa wanted to know. Closing his eyes again, his hand wandered over the mattress to Iwaizumi's one, stroking gently the long fingers and the back of it. After all, they still had to solve that case, right? Maybe the police officer had some new hints, or even suspects?
“No...but nevertheless we should head for the police station” the forensic doctor replied seriously, but didn't respond to his nickname as his mind was a little off now.
However, when he looked at his handsome detective, his peaceful state, he could relax a little more and snuggled up again. Being the big spoon there, his lips brushed the back of Oikawa's neck and his hands shoved themselves around his waist, so he could feel how his upper body wrapped itself perfectly around Oikawa's back.
“It...was Atsumu-san" he then admitted quietly, "I think it’s for the best, if I tell him. About us, I mean...it wouldn’t be fair to lie or making him having his hopes up, you know...”
Just like pulling the trigger, Oikawa shut his eyes open by hearing that jerk's name coming out of Iwaizumi's mouth and he rolled over, until he could face the other.
“What...did he want?” he asked suspiciously.
"I don't know."
“Uhm...well..." Oikawa looked aside, somehow pouting. Somehow blushing. Somehow...trying to find a way not to be a bitch about that asshole again and acting like the adult he was supposed to be.
"I guess...you're right with that. Even if I would have made him suffer a little bit more...!” he couldn't drop it all, Atsumu had a grip on him and he never failed on making him angry or irritated. Especially now, because Hajime was involved.
“We need to go and solve this case, you still need to tell me what you found out!” Tooru then decided for a little escape, getting up from bed quickly and throwing the blanket aside over Iwaizumi's legs.
“Hey...! Hey, Tooru!” he was called back, but Iwaizumi knew well enough that Atsumu was a red flag.
Sighing, he got up too. Coming over to the detective who was collecting his clothes, he wrapped his arms around him from behind, lowering his chin on the other’s shoulder as he leaned in.
“I’ll tell you when we’re on the way. But first...can you answer me one question?” he asked quietly into Tooru’s ear, rubbing calming with his hand over the stomach.
“What is it?” Oikawa didn't turn around this time and tried to calm down his pounding heart because of the intimate hug, because of his anger if it comes to Miya.
A slight smile appeared on Iwaizumi's face and he clearly felt his own heartbeat beating strong against his chest again and again. His fingertips traced a little bit up and down.
“As...we shared a few kisses now...as we confessed to each other...” he started quietly, smiling even more, clearly wanting to make up for that ruined light atmosphere there, “And as I really like to refer to it in a proper way, if someone asks me...”
Iwaizumi turned him around in his embrace by his shoulders, looking at him in the eyes.
“...can I interpret that as...” pausing, he lowered his gaze and lifted it after a few seconds in silence, a cute red tint coloring his cheeks, “Tooru, by any chance...will you be...my boyfriend?” he finally asked, and couldn't stop himself from smiling so innocently, so purely and so much in love.
Oikawa stared at him in disbelief, as his cheeks already reddened, but he managed to keep his cool and decided to tease Iwaizumi a bit. Putting on an offended expression, he took the ring of his necklace and lifted it to Iwaizumi's eyelevel.
“Iwaizumi Hajime...I thought we were already married!” he joked dryly, but the other's confused expression made him cup his now boyfriend's cheeks.
“I’d love to” Tooru replied sincerely now, smiling at him with a sweet and happy sparkle in his eyes.
The same happiness that let Iwaizumi do something unconventional: grabbing Oikawa's hips, he lifted him under a surprised shriek up in the air, twirling with him around for a moment, laughing and then letting him down carefully, only enough to lean his forehead on Oikawa's chest.
“As I told you...it’s not so bad being your husband” Hajime looked up slowly, “You’re...making me damn happy, Oikawa Tooru...”
“You would regret it the moment you’ll say 'yes' to me!” Oikawa joked with his pure laughter Iwaizumi loved so much, “I can be very annoying sometimes, I don’t even know how in the hell you’ve fallen for me anyway, Iwaizumi Hajime.”
And as his feet touched the floor again, he embraced the shorter male and hid his blushing messy face in his neck.
“I won’t say that until I'll try” the forensic doctor muttered, “I mean...the annoying part seems to attract me too” he made a joke, as he caught himself on the thought of how it might feel to be really married with him.
Stroking the fine hairline of Oikawa's nape, he tilted his head to speak directly into his ear.
“Because all of your small gestures, your eyes and everything else just dragged me to you...”
And then they really needed to part, getting ready to get to the hospital, but not without a small breakfast first.
*
On their way, Oikawa just hummed happily, holding Iwaizumi's hand, stroking it gently, sometimes glancing over to the forensic doctor and suppressing a giggle.
He didn't have to hide anything anymore, just accept his own feelings and being accepted...what else could he wish for? And what people might think of them didn't matter. They should look! Stare! Iwaizumi was just pretty proud there, proud of the man next to him.
Arriving at the hospital, they had to part though, because Oikawa wanted to go to Kuroo's lab, whereas Iwaizumi had his...meet-up.
Looking at each other, the forensic doctor was the first one who leant in and gave him a short peck on the lips. With slightly red cheeks and a smirk, Hajime sighed and parted ways with a laid-back attitude on.
Oikawa shook his head, smiling, and walked to Kuroo’s laboratory. Opening the door without knocking again, he greeted him.
“Kuroo!~ Morning!” he sang, which was pretty suspiciously for him as it wasn't just an act. As it was nothing more than...himself.
So Kuroo looked up from his work, lifting eyebrows and mouth slightly open. After what happened yesterday...
“O-Oikawa? Are you...okay? How are you?!” the chemist asked with a concerned expression now and jumped up, hurrying to him, grabbing Oikawa by his arms and turning him slightly to the left and to the right. Usually, he should complain, but he didn't. He even...laughed?!
“Kuroo, I'm fine!" he chuckled and then his smile became even brighter, making him look like a five-year-old who had to announce with pride that he had tied his shoelaces on his own, "I’m just so happy! Iwa-chan and I...Iwa-chan and I are together!!” he exclaimed all excited then, and caused much more confusion for his friend.
Okay. Iwa-chan. So...he is Iwa-chan again for him? That's good - No, wait! What?!
“You and Iwaizumi...for real?!” Kuroo shouted in disbelief.
“For real!” Oikawa shouted back, laughing.
And then, Kuroo only smiled happily, hugging him tightly.
“Tooru...I’m really so happy for you!" he sighed in relief, "That you finally found someone who...is able to make you feel good and...makes you a better person.”
“Kuroo...are you saying I was a bad person before I met Iwa-chan?” Oikawa said with a chuckle, as they pulled away releasing the embrace.
“Of course not, idiot! But you know what I mean, since Iwaizumi came into your life...you changed, you became more cheerful. You started living your life, I'd like to say?!” the other explained with a wry smile.
"Is that so?"
Oikawa owed Kuroo a lot. He had always been there for him, he was his best friend. And sometimes, the detective was afraid to be a bother for Kuroo, always worrying him. But he knew that Kuroo immensely cared for him, just as he immensely cared for Kuroo.
"Thank you..."
*
Iwaizumi inhaled once, then walked the last meters to the morgue and entered. As he had expected, Atsumu was already there, sitting on the forensic doctor's swivel chair and turning slightly left and right.
When he heard the door opening, he looked up, his eyebrows lifting and a little smile escaped his lips.
“Good morning” Iwaizumi greeted him first, closing the door behind him. He got nervous, really nervous. The kind of sweaty hands nervous. Not being sure, if it would end well nervous.
“Mornin'~” Atsumu replied with a smile and when he wanted to stand up, Iwaizumi just gestured that he could stay there sitting, and walked over to him. Taking the stool next to him, he sat down too.
God...he already felt like shit about this.
“So...I'm sorry...that I had to skip the lunch yesterday...” Hajime started, hesitantly.
Skipping lunch because he had been with Tooru, snuggling up, kissing...
It would end so bad.
“It’s fine, don’t worry, we’ll have another chance!” Atsumu only shrugged and tried to reassure him, putting his mind at ease, as he noticed how anxious Iwaizumi seemed to be. What was he worrying about?
"Hajime-kun...are you okay?"
The forensic doctor lowered his gaze and a little helpless smirk appeared.
“Listen...I’m not good at this, actually. It won’t surprise me, if I’ll be an asshole for you afterwards.”
With the questioned look he got from Atsumu, he went on, stammering now.
“I...I can’t do this. Going on another date with you..." he could see how irritated Atsumu was, how sad he became now, disappointed. Of course.
"Yesterday...” he exhaled, “I like you, Atsumu. I said so. You’re still one of the most outgoing and interesting people I've ever known, and...I just can’t date you."
His voice cracked. Maybe the other male didn't notice as he had a lot to go through for himself.
He wasn't able to date him? So suddenly? That wasn't reasonable, because...Hajime didn't seem to be a man who would play around with others just for fun, dropping them like a hot potato right after.
“I...don’t get it, Hajime-kun. You said you like me, and still you can’t date me? Sorry, but it doesn't sound reasonable at all" Atsumu blinked away, trying to seriously think about it, "Did I...offend you? Did I do something wrong? If so, tell me” he hoped it was so, perhaps because he had been too straightforward, Hajime maybe just didn't like the kiss on the cheek...?
Iwaizumi's heart got heavy...he wanted to escape. He so wanted to run away.
“You didn’t offend me. You...did nothing wrong. Really" a sad smile crawled up, “I’m the one to blame...I wanted to do this. I wanted to give it a try with you, because...I know that you're sincere with your feelings for me and as I said...I like being with you. But..."
Inhaling again, Iwaizumi shrugged slightly, looking at the ceiling, "Do you know...why I ran off yesterday? I know it was the most fucked up thing to do, but..." he layed his hands in his lap, and by leaning forward like that, the necklace beneath his shirt got a bit more to be seen, the shape of the ring clearly pressing through the fabric.
"I...I think...I can't fall in love with you like you deserve it. And I simply can’t date you because...my heart was already taken before we met, and I didn’t realize it. I...I tried to ignore it, because I thought it was the most stupid thing that could happen and...I’m so sorry..." he whispered and looked back at him.
Atsumu stared at him in disbelief. He just...couldn’t believe it. He couldn’t believe that...Oikawa stole Hajime from him.
He finally had interest in someone, had finally found someone who listened to him and tried to get to know him.
And Oikawa took him away from him.
He clenched his fists, and lowered his gaze with a sharp grin.
“It’s him, right? It’s him again...! First at work, now this...he keeps intruding and ruining everything!” Atsumu couldn't hide his anger anymore and yelled.
It was nothing against Iwaizumi and the latter knew that, he wasn't mad at him.
He was mad at Oikawa. Again.
"A-Atsumu..."
It wasn't that Iwaizumi couldn't understand that.
"Please...it isn’t like that" the forensic doctor tried, but it was definitely the wrong way to go. And knowing that Tooru was right next door didn't help too.
“And what is it?!" Atsumu shouted, jumping up from the chair now, giving a snarl. Keeping walking up and down, he shook his head, trying to get a grip, but he just couldn't.
"Hajime, he kept ruining my life! He kept intruding in my cases, and I won't let a mere murderer have you!”
Then staring at his feet, Atsumu already regretted his outburst in front of his crush, but calming down seemed impossible, when his blood was boiling like that.
“You know..." Miya swallowed, looking up with a hurt expression and satred at Iwaizumi carefully for a moment. The forensic doctor had no idea, what this would cost him, choosing Oikawa...
"You'll see it with your own eyes...that bastard isn’t like you wish him to be..."
He turned around, ready to leave. Iwaizumi's jaw muscles tensed.
"Atsumu, don't-" but he cut himself off.
What had he expected? Of course it would have ended like that...
*
Oikawa left Kuroo's laboratory with the analysis papers in his hands, still smiling and drown in his happiness. He wanted to compare it with the autopsy report, therefore with Hajime.
His Hajime, his...boyfriend.
The detective even giggled and his steps became much lighter, almost like...little jumps in the air. But right when he was about to enter the morgue, he noticed his so hatred enemy Miya Atsumu leaving, who wasn't so fond to see Oikawa either. Both male's facial expressions hardened as they stared at each other - maybe, in their minds they were already kicking each other's ass.
“I was having such a good day until now, thanks” Oikawa commented with a theatrical sigh.
Atsumu glared at him and his hands could only clench into fists because of the rage that hadn't stopped to boil in his veins.
If it were for him, he would have brought him into jail by himself. Forever. Or even worse.
“Are you deaf as well as dumb? Geez” Oikawa got right into his provocation mode and wanted to make his way past him, going through the door.
Atsumu was so close...so close to get over the edge. So close to lose his nerves, just by looking at that guy. That same guy who murdered his dear friend...
And it was that last provocative sentence that let Atsumu twirl around, having a reason to burst out. Grabbing Oikawa by the collar of his pullover, he pushed him around, against the stoned wall. Hit by surprise, the papers fell on the ground.
"You goddamn bastard!" Atsumu yelled, "How dare you still even call yourself a detective?! If it was me, I’d have arrested you long ago!"
He was loud enough that everyone heard him. And so did Iwaizumi. His heart jumped and and he ran outside. His eyes widened, when he saw that scene. And his first thought wasn't about Atsumu, it was about Oikawa who was still being held against the wall.
"Atsumu! Fuck, let him go!"
"Do you have fun, ruining others' lives?! You drug addicted moron!" Atsumu didn't even care for Iwaizumi's interruption.
However, yelling and being threatened had never been a solution to scare the shit out of Oikawa - therefore, he was only smirking, giving him a hatred glare.
“You’re just not that successful as a detective like me, and this makes you crazy” Tooru replied. Seeing Atsumu so enraged, he was trying to set that level even higher. How far can he be pushed? He shouldn't play games there, but...it was all he could do to defend himself in front of that jerk, in front of the one who had tried to date Hajime.
The jerk, who had been Heiji's best friend.
“Jealous about me now?!" Oikawa added.
“Jealous!? There’s no way of me being jealous of such a trash you are!"
"Really? And what about not having Iwa-chan all for yourself?” Oikawa yelled back, as Atsumu accusations made his heart heavy.
Trying to push him away, he only got a punch in return.
“You fucking murderer!” Atsumu’s voice echoed through the corridor, leading other people to watch too, “I should have done this long ago!”
Iwaizumi just wanted to stop Oikawa, but the disaster had already taken place under many more eyes watching the scene.
He saw Oikawa tumbling to the side, tumbling back then and rushed forward.
"Got you," Iwaizumi murmured when he had a grip on the other's shoulders, looking at him in shock, "Gosh...are you alright?!"
Atsumu stared in disbelief at the forensic doctor, who had made his way between them.
Not again...not again Oikawa was chosen and he...like back then.
The person next to Oikawa turned around, looking at him with disappointed but also pleading eyes.
Not again...
“Atsumu...calm down. Please!” Iwaizumi said, quietly but tense.
Gritting his teeth, the blonde detective shook his head lightly.
“You don’t know what he did! He’s just a-"
“Stop calling him a murderer!! I got that things went damn wrong!” Iwaizumi now shouted back in anger, which made the other flinch.
Why is he taking his side...why is it always Oikawa...
“Hajime...step aside...” Atsumu insisted, which only let the forensic doctor gnarl quietly under his breath.
“So what? That you can beat the shit out of him?!”
“He deserves much more!”
“Don’t be such an asshole!”
The detective pressed his lips together and tried to get through to him, trying to convince him why he was feeling like that, but he didn't find the right words.
Not for Oikawa. Not for Hajime. Not for...everything as he was so enraged, so sad, so...
“Fuck it! Open your eyes!”
And then it happened, that he tried to make his way to Oikawa with physical force. Pushing him aside, but Iwaizumi held against him. They struggled, pushed themselves around, tackled, and with all the sudden movements it was eventually Iwaizumi, who got hit himself by accident. Making a step backwards, his lip felt wet. His tongue licked across the spot. Ironlike taste.
His fingertips touched his mouth, his lip was bleeding. He looked up at Atsumu, who just seemed to notice what he had done. Not a word left the enraged detective's mouth, because...Iwaizumi hit back. Only once, but it was enough to make Atsumu lose his balance and fall back on his butt.
Even if Oikawa's eyesight was a bit blurry because of the punch and his bleedy nose, he couldn't accept Hajime getting hit like that.
Pushing Iwaizumi gently aside, he got closer to the Miya on the ground. He wanted to punch him, but...no. He should use that chance to change. To be kind. To try to overcome the weight of the words Atsumu had said to him, even if a part of them were true.
“Don’t you dare touch my boyfriend again” Tooru hissed, glaring down at him, while everyone had come out of their rooms, staring at them.
Atsumu got back up to his feet, his lips curling into a grin of disapproval. Of hurt pride. Of pain.
“Your boyfriend ? My ass! He’ll leave you after he'll know the truth! Or you'll kill him before he gets to know you, just like you did with Heiji!”
“I didn’t kill Heiji!" Losing his cool, Oikawa lashed out on him, got him up and set another punch into Atsumu's face, shaking him by his collar.
"I didn't kill him!! And you know that!" he shouted, "He died, because-"
“He died because of you, you damn drug addicted bastard!” Atsumu interrupted him, fighting back and causing Oikawa’s mouth to bleed too, hitting him.
"You are destined to kill everyone that stands by your side, you murderer" with it, Miya sapt a bit of blood to the ground.
"Stop it!" Iwaizumi shouted, trying to get through and to drag Atsumu away from him. Kuroo was the helpful hand who held Oikawa back too.
Atsumu didn't want to be held back, especially by Iwaizumi. Not by the one who had taken the other side.
Freeing himself with one move, he swallowed and tried to get his cracked voice under control, before he spoke to the forensic doctor.
“Get to know him for what he really is, then come and tell me he's still your boyfriend.”
And with that, he left, all eyes on him. But it was the last thing Atsumu cared for, right now.
Iwaizumi dropped it, he didn't even reply as it was pointless anyway. So he turned around to the chemist, who let go of Oikawa now and nodded at him.
"Thank you.”
Kuroo nodded and then inhaled deeply.
“Come on, get back to work! Nothing to see!” he shouted at the rest of curious people. The only two, who were still there, were Akaashi and Akane, as they had returned from the office right now. But staying quiet, they witnessed in silence.
So Iwaizumi stepped over to Oikawa, trying to look at him in the eye because his gaze was lowered.
“Give us...some minutes, okay?” he said to Kuroo, taking Oikawa's hand into his, “I have the first-aid kit in my office” he mumbled, looking at the detective, "Let me fix this for you, okay?”
Oikawa didn't reply and so he was softly dragged by Hajime. His face hurt, but not as much as Atsumu’s words had hurt his heart.
How dare you still even call yourself a detective?! You’re a murderer! You’ll kill him just like Heiji!
Those words were replaying in loop in Oikawa’s mind.
They entered the morgue, and Iwaizumi closed the door behind them. Directing his boyfriend to the stretcher, he looked for the first-aid kit and came back to him. Putting it on the edge of the stretcher, he sat down too, opening the kit and looking for the right tools...desinfectant, cotton balls. Wetting one of them, he turned to the still silent detective.
“It...will burn a bit...” he warned, touching cautiously Oikawa's lip, as the latter flinched a bit.
Watching him carefully, as he was doing so, “That’s just a mere laceration. Don't worry” Hajime mumbled, “No need for stitches. What about your nose? Can you move it or...?”
He kept talking, although he knew that it wasn't what hurt him the most...that it wasn't what made Tooru fell so silent.
Subconsciously clenching his fists, opening them and repeating it again and again, Oikawa had a stern look on his face.
As Iwaizumi had finished, he got up, putting the tools away, turning around and...Oikawa was still sitting on the stretcher.
With a little sigh, Iwaizum took the other’s hands in his.
“Hey...Tooru...look at me” he whispered quietly, facing him directly.
“Tooru, love...” Hajime closed his hands around Tooru’s restless ones, and the latter looked up, stopping his clenching-unclenching moves.
His eyes widened as he saw Iwaizumi’s bloody bottom lip. It had stopped bleeding by now.
“Ha...Hajime...” he hadn't noticed it before. How much had he been distracted?
Touching lightly the other’s lip, he felt guilty.
Look at what you’ve done...look at what you’ve done to him! You’re slowly killing him.
Oikawa’s mind kept playing its games with him. It was so easy to get down to his very core, to his fears, bringing them up and making him fall back into the past.
“It’s all my fault...again. It’s all...my fault...” he muttered, lowering his lashes as his sight was lost in darkness.
“It's nothing” Iwaizumi reassured him, but he knew that it was already too much for Oikawa, “Believe it or not, I had several sports injuries with such cuts. It'll heal. Still, I’m not used to punch anymore” he mumbled, because his hand’s knuckles clearly hurt.
The detective didn't talk back.
"Hey...don’t you dare let that shit go into your mind!” squeezing the detective's hands first, he released one and his fingertips moved up, until he could tap against Oikawa's chest.
“Don’t let it get in here.”
But this wouldn't do it, right? Atsumu had aimed for the most vulnerable spots, and had been too successful.
“Come here” the forensic doctor whispered, pulling Oikawa right into his arms, wanting to give him support and actually...he didn't know what else he could do more than that.
“Thanks for defending me anyway...it's been a first for me”
Oikawa stared at his boyfriend now, and he couldn't be so happy about that Thank you at all.
A sad look drew up on his face.
“I’m used to him saying those word to me...but...” Tooru began and stopped. He was afraid of what Hajime would think if he found out that he...that he sometimes...
You drug addicted moron!
Atsumu’s voice replayed once more.
If Hajime found out that he sometimes needed drugs, that he sometimes couldn't sleep at all, that he wandered around the city all night, that he lived in a messy place...
Would Hajime still want to be with him?
“Actually, I’m really upset about that...” Iwaizumi admitted with his caring eyes and smile, “I didn’t know he...was friends with Nakamura. He didn’t tell me that. And yeah, it explains his anger, but it didn’t justify all that stuff he said to you.”
He paused for a little moment, exhaling with a puff and intertwined their hands again.
“Tooru...you trust me, right?” he asked very quietly.
“I do, Hajime...” the other replied quietly, lowering his gaze and staring at their hands now.
Finally someone who holds him and doesn’t let him go for any reason.
Finally someone...who understands him.
He really trusted him, he would even trust his life to him, but...no one would understand nor accept what he had done in the past...what he was sometimes still doing.
“Good...and I trust you" Iwaizumi nodded lightly, "And...I told you before to never ever be scared of telling me something. What Atsumu mentioned...” he hestitated, “About...the drugs...I know that there's something about it since we’ve been at Makki’s. But I won’t push you, and I won’t be disappointed or anything, if you don’t wanna talk about the past. Just...”
Hajime held his hand a little bit tighter.
“Just...if it’s something that still is a concern for you...I’d rather want you to tell me. You know what my job is. You know what I’ve already seen so far. I can deal with it. If you feel ready...I’ll listen, okay?” he reached to his cheek, lifting his head like that and got closer, “I’ll listen and if you want, I’ll help you. If you don’t...it's also fine. Just that you know: I won’t leave you.”
Iwaizumi looked him into his eyes, "And I will try to change that negative shutter box inside your head!” he tapped Oikawa's forehead with a finger, “Because I want to hear much more of your laughter and see your smiles. I want to see you happy, okay?”
Somehow, although nothing was solved, his words reassured Oikawa. He gathered up his courage and sighed.
“Okay...as I said...I trust you. So please...please don’t judge me, although...it will be hard...”
“I won’t” Iwaizumi answered in all his honesty, grasping Oikawa's hand more and giving him all the mental support he was able to.
Inhaling, Oikawa nodded and finally...he started to tell someone about his being. About his...inapproriate behaviour. His thoughts...
“I...sometimes need drugs. I...I need them to forget the negative thoughts...when they come up, you know...I need to get rid of them. Else, I can't focus. And so...I sometimes need Makki's help, but I’m not a drug addicted. Really, I’m not...!” he sounded desperate, shooking his head.
“I know I’m weak...because I can’t forget what happened to Heiji...I can’t stop blaming myself because it is my fault...and I go to visit him at the cemetery, every day. I talk to him, sometimes even at night...I don’t sleep. And I don’t know how to escape this. It’s just...so tiring, so frustrating...that sometimes I don't think I can handle this anymore...”
Tears started forming in his eyes and Oikawa's voice got quieter and trembled.
“And I don’t want you to bear with this. To bear with me. Because this is my punishment, not yours, Hajime...”
As Iwaizumi had promised, he listened to him. Every sentence, every word. He didn't even interrupt him onvce. And of course, he worried...as much as everything made more and more sense now. When Oikawa was finished, he rubbed his hand gently.
"Actually...it’s not surprising or shocking. No insult here, but I think you know exactly how exhausted you look..."
Looking up to the brunette, whose shoulders had sunk even more, he whispered, "Can I....tell you my thoughts about it?" wiping off a tear, Hajime gave him a little encouraging smile.
Oikawa nodded lightly but then said, “If you want to leave me, I understand...I wouldn’t want to stay with a person like me, either...”
"So...if I’d be in your position, you wouldn’t stay by my side? I don’t believe that.”
Iwaizumi didn't let him have it his way and snapped his forehead now that his boyfriend looked at him totally perplexed and with his mouth slightly open.
“What I see...” Iwaizumi started, “...is a person that had to go through some terrible experiences. You went through more than most people would in their whole life. You made a mistake, and that...will haunt you. It will haunt you every day and night. And you’ll never stop blaming yourself, I got that. You know, even if it's a different death case, I’ll still never forget mine."
His mom's death would hunt him forever...
"And that you’re in need of something to sedate yourself, to calm yourself down...despite the substances, you know that antidepressants worked like that, too? I had to take them a long time after my mom's suicide. You’re not a junkie, you’re wrecked and devastated and clearly tried too long without anyone helping you.”
Leaning his forehead on Tooru’s, he lowered his gaze, “And believe me, I’d liked to punch the shit out of that guy who hurt you so bad...because...in my opinion, pure rage helps no one. The dead remain dead. Tooru, you’re not alone. You have me. I’m your goddamn boyfriend - forgotten? And your fake husband. I’m not there for good times only. I’m there if you need me, and I’ll work this out with you. It won’t disappear, but it can get better...You can get better. Learning to deal with it...it’s not a weakness. People who won’t be affected by that are psychopaths, you know that.”
And while his lips got together again, Oikawa could only watch him as he spoke, as he...really understood him. As he really wanted to help him.
No one other than Kuroo had done so in the past, and Makki too, obviously.
But having Hajime by his side now, feeling his love...it was different. Safe.
“I...I don’t know what I’ve done in my life to deserve someone like you, Haji...” Tooru sobbed, hugging him back tightly.
That love and that warmth he searched for so long, but he had never managed to find...he would have died happily for him, for that great man that Iwaizumi Hajime was.
“I think...that you deserve much more than you think of yourself. Let's...make a deal” Iwaizumi suggested with a more cheerful voice, “If...your thoughts begin to overwhelm you...you’ll tell me. Time doesn’t matter. If I’m not with you, call me, message me. If you feel like you’re in need of anything...tell me, too. I want to know it. I want to know you, Tooru.”
“Okay...I will.”
Iwaizumi kissed the cute spot on his ear.
"And...hmm...what can I offer you in return...else it wouldn’t be deal, right?!” he pondered with a little smirk.
“You are everything I need” Tooru said without hesitance, cupping his cheeks. Looking at him in those olive-green eyes that sent him shivers all the time, he blinked.
Being looked at like that, Iwaizumi couldn't stop his body from going all red and lowered his gaze for a moment in embarassment. His heartbeat getting stronger against his chest...
“Okay” Hajime confirmed with that cute little smile of his, as he felt Tooru’s warm hands on his cheeks and glanced at him, “Then...I’ll make sure that you won’t have to worry about me. Or...I can offer you all of me, if it’s like this” he joked with a lewd undertone, trying to make the other blush as a little revenge, but failed because he had to chuckle.
“I love you...I so damn love you...” Hajime whispered and leant in for a tender kiss. The detective blushed lightly, but tried to get his composure back. So he smirked, and narrowed his eyes a little.
“Then...” Tooru lengthened the word, pushing Hajime down on the stretcher by his shoulder and bending over as to top him, “You’ll regret saying that, Iwaizumi Hajime” he smiled at him, and initiated the next kiss with much more passion as he slowly stroked with his tongue across Iwaizumi's upper lip, getting an invitiation into his mouth as a reward.
Their tongues danced with each other, and a moan escaped the forensic doctor's lips. It seemed so perfect...until Oikawa began to tickle him. The forensic doctor was laughing so hard now, that Oikawa had to laugh along with him.
“Oh g-god...please...hahaha...I-I beg you...Tooru please!! S-stop it...” tears were running down his cheeks, as he was such a laughing mess right now, and his tummy hurt so much.
“Woah, will you take a room?!”
Akane’s voice rang suddenly in the room and they couldn't get away from each other fast enough, so she stared at them in disbelief. Not disgusted, more...excited that it was true what she had witnessed half an hour ago. That cute kiss as a goodbye.
And she wasn't the only one standing on the doorstep now, Akaashi was staring at them with a more or less surprised expression too.
“Ah, Akane-chan! I was wondering if Iwa-chan can handle being tickled, if a murderer wanted to knock him out like that one day!" Oikawa said with a nonchalant smile, trying not to embarrass themselves more, but that excuse was...
"Lame" Hajime murmured, turning dark red now and put his clothes back in order.
“Of couuuurse~” the young woman only smirked, and put her hands on her hips, “I saw you!” she chirped, “Or is kissing also some kind of handling you have to accomplish because a murderer would clearly do so?”
And because she knew that her mentor had started that goodybye kiss before, she added in a singsong: “Neeee~ Iwaizumi-senseiiiiii?”
Dark dark red.
“We already have guessed, that you're in love with Oikawa-san” Akaashi stated with a little shrug as he went to the desk now and received a shocked “What?!” from Iwaizumi, who sat up, gently pushing Tooru from his lap.
“Evidences took place” his assistant turned around, “The most obvious one was that you almost murdered me with that scalpel, because your mind was filled with thoughts about Oikawa-san. Second, Kuroo-san also mentioned that you were so blind of your own feelings whereas everyone else could see that. I have to agree to it. Third, you were overly obsessed with that scarf and whereas you throw your jacket in a corner, you put the scarf neatly on your desk and sometimes sniffle-"
“That’s enough! Thank you!” Iwaizumi interrupted him very quickly, because it was going even worse for him.
“I won’t mind taking Akaashi-kun as my assistant” Oikawa commented with a laughter, clearly satisfied with all the deductions Akaashi made on them. For that, he only gained a light punch on the head by his love. Worth it.
“But Iwa-chan...you really sniffled my scarf?! What are you, a dog?!”
And now, even Akane and a oh-so-done Akaashi laughed at him.
Iwaizumi snarled slightly, like a dog. The little punch wasn't enough, so he went for a more offensive strategy.
“Well...seems I just missed your presence around me” he shrugged as cool as he could, which made Akane whistle.
Getting up with a played smirk, patting his boyfriend on the shoulder who was blushing madly now. Getting more serious, Iwaizumi went on.
“Yesterday’s autopsy told me that our victim had some river-rendez-vous. Interesting to know that she had swallowed some of the river water, as her lungs showed me. So...the food poisoning wasn’t the only death cause or better: it hadn’t been the first try. Still I wonder who would go to some happy lunch after he was almost drown.“
He looked at Oikawa, "What...does the analysis from Kuroo say?“
“I thought so too" Oikawa cleared his throat, running a hand through his hair, "The analysis just confirmed what you said. But there’s something more...why did she appear now in front of her friends to show that she was still alive after four years of being dead? And who wants her dead for real?”
"I carefully examined the surrounding, and there wasn’t anything weird but...the poison...the victim carried it herself“ Akane announced to everyone's surprise, as they hadn’t had the time to compare all their results together.
“What?! How?” Iwaizumi wanted to know, of course.
"She had a little box for medicaments with her. Inside, there was the poison.”
Hajime looked at Tooru with knitted eyebrows.
"That’s the second thing I have to tell you...it makes sense that she had her medication with her. Her carotid stenosis was surely due to a pathogenic genesis...“
"Acetyl salicylic acid?“ Oikawa suggested and got a nod.
Suddenly his phone rang. He took it out of his pocket, picking the call up.
“Hello?”
“Oikawa, we need you again, right now. We found another corpse!”
No greeting, nothing. The seriousness in Sawamura's voice made Oikawa stiffen a bit.
“Where?” he only asked back, put him on loudspeaker, as the other three listened to the conversation with careful eyes.
“Near the river. Tell Iwaizumi-san to come, too.”
Oikawa smirked at the little group.
“I think we have to deal with a serial killer!” he was way too excited, "Who wants to come with me? You don't have a choice in here, Iwa-chan!"
"Just let’s go” the forensic doctor sighed.
*
Of course, the police officers were already there. The car's blue lights reflected on the river’s surface and Iwaizumi swallowed when he noticed that it was almost the same spot he had been with Oikawa the other day.
The little group got out of thei van and walked up to Daichi.
A barrier tape was wrapped around a special area and on the shore, the body was already laying, waiting for them.
"So...another woman?“ Iwaizumi's eyebrows knitted as his mind already drove the highway of mental work.
The body was totally wet and pale. The victim looked damn fresh. How long ago? How long had it been since she was thrown into the river?
"She isn’t dead for so long" he stated audible for the rest, just by looking at her from a distance.
"Why?" Akane wanted to know as she hadn’t been occupied with researches of drowned people yet, "You haven't even examined her yet..."
The forensic doctor nodded, and pointed over to the body, as he was explaining the reason behind his assumption.
"The body isn’t swollen. You know...floaters are really cruel to look at. The putrefaction isn't as fast as on land, because there are no reactions with oxygen. If you drown, you can stay for a long time under water. Just when buoyancy takes place because of gas you will reach the water's surface. It also depends on water's temperature. The colder it is, the better it'll be for letting a body disappear. So... if the body looks like that...she isn’t dead for so long - or at least hasn’t been for so long in the water."
In the meantime, Oikawa observed the body and besides that, he had to agree with Iwaizumi: the same cause of death.
“We have the same killer here, uh” he just commented dryly, and Daichi nodded, introducing them to the case with a brief summary.
“If we don’t stop the culprit, there may be plenty of other victims...” he sighed in frustration.
One of the things Sawamura hated the most in is job was being too late.
Too late to prevent a crime, stepping in the dark. And there, it was even more serious as it was about a serial killer.
“Trust me, I’ll find him” Oikawa said confidently, making the officer lift his eyebrows.
“How are you so sure it’s a male?”
“Mind telling him, my dear Iwa-chan?” Oikawa passed the baton on to Iwaizumi with a smirk, which made the latter blush a bit.
When the detective looked at him like that, his heart wouldn't stop beating fast. Not after they confessed to each other now.
Glancing at Daichi, he cleared his throat.
"The first victim had water in her lungs, from that river here. The poison was on her medication box and so she intoxicated herself...time didn't matter. She was in need of the medics on a regular daily base. There's just one problem: if she faked her death or at least nobody knew about her, being alive, then why was she going out for dinner with friends? I think," Iwaizumi looked at his boyfriend, who didn't interrupt him as he was totally right.
"She knew exactly what would come. That she would be murdered. And maybe...she even knew about the poison and touched it only in the moment she thought it would be the best to die. She...ended it herself."
"That...doesn't make sense to me," Daichi's face showed an irritated expression, "Poisoning herself? Why?"
"Because she met with the murderer. And here...it's quite the same. Our recent victim isn't as slim and short as the other one. Let's say it was a woman who did this...don't you think that kind of woman must have been even heavier than her? Having more muscles? I'm sure, somebody would have recognised her."
Oikawa stood up then.
"So...what about her friends our first victim was with? Anything new? Did they know about her death four years ago, or are they totally strangers?“ he asked the officer.
“They know, but actually they weren’t that close with her” Daichi replied, and was somehow more surprised by the fact that Oikawa and Iwaizumi were actually a great team. He hadn't expected it after their first problematic meeting.
With that, the group continued with the rest of the work: examining the surrounding carefully, searching for hints, evidences... Minutes passed by and after some time Oikawa got a bit impatient, announcing that he wanted to go ahead to the hospital, if there wasn't anything for him to do.
"Akane?" Iwaizumi called over, where the young woman stood. She hummed.
“Not quite sure, but I think I found something.”
Iwaizumi lifted his left eyebrow and exchanged a quick look with Oikawa before he went over to her.
“I found this here on the shore,” she had already photographed the item with the evidence number card next to it, and walked towards him, showing it to him on the screen.
Within seconds, Iwaizumi's eyes widened.
“Have you touched it?!” he asked dead-serious, and she shook her head in confusion. So he swallowed and called around, “Had anyone touched evidence number 5?”
The staff declined, and the forensic doctor turned around to Daichi, “Have your colleagues had contact with the soil, the water or anything else here?”
"N-No, I don't think so. We were just called because a pedestrian found her while walking on that way over there."
Looking up, Iwaizumi noticed the path they had come from too. That was a safe distance, but still...
“I know that handwriting” he spoke to Oikawa, “It's the same guy who had our whole team nearly infected with some virus two years ago. Had touched the envelope and next, we sat in quarantine. It’s that lightblue paper. I’d recognise it miles away.”
And with that one information, Oikawa's world seemed to be turned upside-down. His eyes widened, his expression was shocked, and although Iwaizumi tried to call to him, he didn't respond.
“Is this...?” Daichi didn't dare to continue.
“It’s only the beginning” Oikawa pressed the words through his parted lips, gritting his teeth.
"Everyone, listen!" Iwaizumi's voice sounded loud and left no space for buts, "Nobody touches anything here! Absolutely nothing!! All involved will undergo decontamination afterwards! If you find something suspiscious, don’t touch it. It’s some kind of biochemical weapon. Furthermore, everyone who wants to retire from this case is free to do so from now on."
Murmurs filled the air, because that was like an apocalypse announcement. Iwaizumi didn't even cared for that babbling, as he looked at his trainee again, speaking much quieter and a bit softer by now. She looked terrified, and she should be.
"Akane, that’s not some mere murder anymore. So I won’t force anyone to work on this from now on. Especially not you. Whatever you say, you won't work on this case."
The young woman didn't even understand what had happened. One minute before, it was some case of drowning or intoxication and the next minute...they had an attack with biochemicals against them?! The forensic doctor put a hand on her shoulder.
"After decontamination, I'll give you other tasks. But this is none of your business."
He couldn't put her in danger.
Iwaizumi then looked at Oikawa and smirked weakly, becasue he knew that they were quite the same, if it was about work.
"Guess...you will go on nevertheless, huh?!"
"Of course."
"Daichi-san, please give report that every letter, every postage will have to be controlled from now on. Everything coming into the police office or to the forensic. Even intern post. I’m expecting a letter like that in the future if we continue digging into this case..."
Although Oikawa smiled at Iwaizumi's seriousness there, admiring his attitude - being all professional and stuff, which was actually really hot - a serious expression was drawn on his face again.
“This...is how everything began...four years ago,” the detective stated quietly, “Heiji’s death. Before that, murders took place, those letters and then...”
“W-what?!” Iwaizumi looked at him, shocked, “W-wait...we had these proofs and all, so...”
So unfortunately their work had been linked...that quarantine and everything. They just hadn't known back then. He glanced from Oikawa to Daichi, “I...will have to unroll everything again," he announced.
"You can count on me," Daichi nodded, as he could give access to all the data in the archive, and it was much quicker to let him help than doing the research on his own.
"The body has to be brought into a separated room. In case it’s also contaminated. I'll do the autopsy later, alone" the forensic doctor looked at the detective with some concern.
“It won't be so easy to put our hands on the culprit, if it's really him” Daichi sighed, “He's still unknown to us, we don’t know his identity, just...”
“Mori. That’s what criminals call him” Oikawa blurted and made both males look at him in surprise.
“Mori? So...the one who has big influence in the criminal world?!” it wasn't a name Daichi had never heard of...more, it was a name that was a threatening to every minor criminal there. Nobody wanted to have that man against theirselves. Nobody.
“I’ll go and do some researches on my own” Oikawa mumbled, already in his own mind bubble, getting through his memory archive, ready to go, ready to...do everything.
Just to solve that damn case and finally see that bastard in jail! He had been searching for him for three years now, because he promised he would find the murderer of his partner.
But he had never got any proof, any trace, nothing. And now...he was back.
But why? Why now? He had to hurry!!
And Iwaizumi got caught by that sudden haste state Oikawa was in. How he fumbled with his fingers, biting his lip. Knitting his eyebrows, he walked towards him, grabbing him by the hand.
"Tooru...look. At. Me.“ Hajime insisted with every word, and didn't care if others would find their closeness suspicious. What mattered was the detective right in front of him.
"You'll come with us first. Security over research. Don’t forget.“ he reminded him and went on more quietly, "And most of all, talk to me about that case! We should compare our results from that time..." he rubbed mildly over Tooru's hand, trying to reassure him, to show him he was there, "Since we haven’t met in the past...I’m sure we will have to combine some of our conclusions, okay?"
Don’t go on your own - he actually intended to say.
“I don’t have that time!” Oikawa blurted all frustrated but...Hajime was right: they needed to compare, to find what the cases had in common, to find the reason behind the recent events. Sighing he rolled his eyes, “Okay...okay, then let’s go” and his grip around Hajime’s hand tigthened a bit.
Sawamura stared at them in...admiration.
“You two...do you have something to tell me?”
Iwaizumi turned around slowly. Having it revealed in front of Atsumu or Akane was something different than doing it in front of some other colleague.
He hesitated a second, then held up Tooru's hand to his lips and kissed it gently.
"He...is my boyfriend."
He declared it with such a calm voice and smiled so sincerely, in a way only someone in love could do. Iwaizumi's smile became a cute smirk and...yes, it felt good to be open about their love.
Because being with Tooru was right. There was nothing to be ashamed of, nothing to hide. Especially not in front of that one colleague he had a good connection with.
“I knew it would end like this!” Daichi exclaimed with a little chuckle, and made both men stare at each other first, then at the police officer, “Now go, you lovey dovey couple, and solve this case properly!”
*
Returning to the hospital, they had to head right to the isolation ward, undergoing the decontamination process. Silently standing in the changing room, they were given new clothes, scrubs and had to give their own clothes to the internal cleaning section. Akaashi was the lucky one there, as he had only observed the outer area and hadn't come too close to the contaminated one. He waited in the office, continuing to check the documents and adding information.
"Guess we can head home first for changing" Iwaizumi murmured, while taking off his jacket and shirt and throwing it right into the bag for the used laundry.
Glancing over to Oikawa, he turned around quickly, when he saw him changing too.
"Eh...it...it was okay, coming out in front of Daichi, right?" Hajime started, as he hadn't given it a proper thought before. Not about consequences, but about Oikawa's opinion first.
"I mean, I just spoke my mind and...“ lost for words, he shrugged. Hajime had never revealed his relationship status before. Even the ones he had, had been...more kept to himself, because he wanted to feel right about it, before going public.
Oikawa looked at his boyfriend, and smiled sweetly. Closing his eyes, he pulled his pullover over his head.
“I think Daichi, as well as Kuroo and everybody else here, knew it before us anyway, Iwa-chan” he replied calmly.
“Mhm...guess I have to agree with that. I think I hunted my own tail without realising it” Hajime smirked, almost chuckling about his own density, and threw his pants into laundry bag too.
But as it was okay with him now, there was something else on Oikawa's mind, as the forensic doctor had already came up with it.
“You know, I’ve never told you..." the detective started hesitantly, looking at him, at the perfect figure which would never fail to amaze him. Clearing his throat slightly, he finished his sentence a bit embarrassed, "I've never told you, but I've never been straight.”
That’s why he hated people like Kim Seokjin who joked and made fun of gay people.
“Thought so" Hajime said, with a soft smile. Oikawa lifted his eyebrows in surprise.
"Your reaction at the party. When Seokjin and his buddies talked about people like...they were special apperances. It bothered me too, but you were much more upset. And I guessed you wouldn’t be so, if you weren’t involved somehow, right?”
Turning around to him, Iwaizumi let his right hand rest on edgy hip bone of his opposite, stroking gently over the skin right above the seam of his pants. Leaning in, he kissed Oikawa on his lips.
“And you were too flirty with me that I couldn't think otherwise" his expression became more cocky now, "But to be honest...I enjoyed it. Flirting with you, I mean.”
“Oho~!" Oikawa made with a funny face, ready for challenge, "I can continue flirting with you, if you're so into it! I haven't even started!” he provoked him in playful tone as his fingertips traced the shape of Iwaizumi's jawline.
Causing him to chuckle, the forensic doctor pulled Oikawa closer, getting more serious again.
“I've never gave it a thought...but I never felt right with women. I thought it was just because work kept me occupied. But right when you entered my life, I totally felt different" Hajime admitted, kissing the other's forehead.
“I first thought you would reject me, but seeing that you weren’t bothered by it...I continued. And I didn’t notice I was falling for you step by step...” Oikawa replied quietly, recalling that period of pining, remembering the period of insecurity but also being more and more enchanted by the other's being.
"I just couldn't. Being with you...feeling embarrassed, feeling a pounding heart...all that kind of stuff I haven't felt before, it was...it is the most amazing thing I've ever felt. And in the end...gender doesn’t matter, the person does, right?”
Iwaizumi smiled happily right from the bottom of his heart, and released Oikawa, as he was going to lose the rest of his clothes, meaning his underwear, with his back to him, as they still had to shower. Towel and clean clothes would await them after.
“So...don't stop flirting with me. As I also won't stop making you blush and falling for me more and more" the forensic doctor chuckled, "I head in first.”
Then Hajime left for one of the shower's cabinets, Oikawa shook slightly his had, smiled at himself, and just felt relieved that Iwaizumi accepted him not only for who he was, but that he also understood him. He didn't have to hide anymore.
And Iwaizumi? He couldn't stop smiling, either.
Couldn't hold back a happy chuckle as he washed his hair. He enjoyed that wonderful feeling that was building up in him. Feeling so loved...being able to love so purely...
What else could he wish for?!
Then his eyes held a more serious expression, as he opened them again. He wished for one more thing: the end of that case.
Back then, everything had led to a dead end. The murderer had escaped. Right after his whole team had almost been killed by that letter bomb...it still sent shivers down Iwaizumi's spine, when he thought of the nightmare they had gone through. And finding that blue letter again...everything seemed to be linked to that past's case where Heiji had died.
Rubbing the decontamination soap over his body, he tried to clear his head more.
It was okay. It would be okay.
Yui wasn't there anyway: even if she hadn't called in sick, he wouldn't have allowed her to be part of the investigation. He would have let her work in another team as long as the case wasn't closed.
Never would he forget, how terrified she had been. Because she was the one who had opened the envelope back then, and she was still blaming herself for that stupid mistake. She laughed, but everyone knew that she was trembling inside. Traumatised.
Looking at the inside of his left elbow now, Iwaizumi traced the scar from countless needles of testing and transfusion. It would always be a reminder to him. How much they had had to fight for surviving.
It had been his blood which had helped Yui to survive.
But it should had also been his responsibility, and not hers. He should have been the one fighting for his life, not Yui...
He had never asked her for forgiveness, as she had never wanted to hear something about that.
He alsp stared at the scars of cuts below...
When he left the cabinet, he threw himself in the given clothes. He waited for Tooru on the other side, sitting in the anteroom on the bench. Standing up when he heard quiet footsteps, somehow the case's weight had put itself on them.
“I’d head home first...changing into something else than these scrubs,” Iwaizumi said, “What about you? Wanna have some borrowed clothes, or go for your own?”
Having Iwa-chan's clothes...his big sweaters...
No. What was he thinking?! The case! The case was more relevant!
Don't snap back into romantic mode! But...having Iwa-chan's scent around would be helpful...
“I don’t wanna ruin your clothes, Iwa-chan. I’ll go home to change after we finished here” the detective shook his head.
Focus. There wasn’t time to think of anything else.
Just the case. Just solving it. Just save others' lives.
“What do you mean ‘ruin my clothes’? I got that you’re way taller than me,” Hajime crossed his arms in front of his chest, almost giving him a snarl in disapproval, and...therefore went for something else.
Seeing Tooru like this, like at the crime scene...he was too lost in investigations again. Too lost in the past, and he clearly wouldn't take care of himself. Again.
“If there's no emergency...7 pm, at my place. Dinner. Or at Osamu’s, your choice. Nevertheless, you'll be at my place after midnight, one o'clock, at the latest. Getting some sleep.” And his serious look and his little frown didn't tell otherwise.
“I mean it, Tooru. At least dinner and sleep are a must.”
“I don’t have time for that” Oikawa hissed, trying to pass.
He didn’t mean to be rude or careless, but that was it. He hadn’t time.
If he rested, that bastard would kill another one, or maybe go straight for someone close to him. He didn't want Hajime to know about his researches. He knew too well that if the killer got to know that Hajime was important for him, then...
“Stupid!” Iwaizumi held him back by the wrist, a bit angry, “It’s not about having time, it’s about not lacking energy if you need it! I know myself that it’s not happy date time now, okay?”
And after he realised that he had gone too emotional, too loud, he sighed and rubbed the still wet back of his head.
“I won’t be in your way, I won’t ask where you’ll be going. Sure you have...sources I shouldn’t know about at all, right? But at least...let me take care of you. Just let me do this.”
Oikawa stared at him for a moment and then a little sad smile appeared on his lips, a 'I told you so' smile that let Iwaizumi in a confused state.
“That’s what I meant about you getting tired of me, one day” Tooru whispered, “I know you worry for me, and I’m glad you do. But...will you be able to accept this? My habits, my behaviour, my attitude, all the time? I’m scared that...one day you wouldn't stand me anymore, Hajime. And I wouldn't blame you for that.”
He knew he was too annoying, too hard to take care of, too stubborn. He knew that Hajime would get tired of him.
That's why he never confessed to him in the first place, that's why he wanted Hajime to date others, to find someone he could be happy with.
Pushing Hajime away from him for that wonderful man's own sake...
However, pushing never worked with the forensic doctor. He was solid as a rock. Solid for his teammates, solid as a partner.
He wouldn't falter that easily. Lifting his eyebrows with every word the detective said, the only reply he had for the brunette was a simple "And?", followed by a calm "That’s all? Therefore I should get tired of you?"
The shorter male exhaled with a puff of air and stepped closer, lowering his arms now.
"I'll let you have it your way. But I offer you a place to come to. To me. It doesn't matter if it’s at my place, at yours, some hotel or whatever. The only thing you have to start to accept...” he paused and grabbed Oikawa's cheeks between thumbs and index fingers to squeeze them.
“...is that you’re allowed to calm down. That you’re allowed to relax after a long day and give your body a rest. You can clearly overcome your limits like a marathoner. But also the best marathoner has his limits, and somewhere to go home to and lay down.”
Losening the grip as Tooru started to complain about the painful squeezes, he caressed his cheeks instead.
“Even in times like this. Especially in times like this. Got it? At least try it. You don't have to do perfect here, just try.”
Oikawa would've cried at his words, if it was for another scene, for another time, but right now he couldn't. He couldn't lose all his composure and he wanted to stay strong in front of his man. Wanted to show him, that he could do this.
“Agree. Now let’s go” Oikawa took Hajime’s hand and dragged him with him, as they were ready to leave.
Iwaizumi needed to go to the police archive first, and Oikawa would do his own researches in the morgue's archive at the same time.
But before that, he embraced the shorter male one more time, and kissed him softly on his lips.
“So...text me, if you won’t make it to seven. But you would regret it...my treat or my cooking” looking him in the eyes, Iwaizumi leant into his ear, “I love you” he whispered and gave him a motivational smile.
Oikawa blushed madly at his words.
Ahhh, Iwa.chan stop doing this!
"I...love you too, Haji...so much” he stuttered, “But I will make it to seven, at your place. I can’t miss Iwa-chan cooking for me, right?!” he agreed all happy to that home-date, then kissed Hajime’s cheek before they have to part.
Iwaizumi had to smile even wider, and it was filled with so much more happiness as he saw Oikawa blushing like this. Also hearing his stuttering.
How can somebody be so cute?!
"Okay, fine with me“ he replied and closed his eyes as he was kissed like that, "Take care."
With a last kiss on the knuckles of his hand, Hajime walked off.
*
Going into an archive was always like going directly into a labyrinth. If you didn't know what you were searching for, you would get lost for sure.
But it wasn't the first time Oikawa was visiting it. Not the first time going on a hunt and therefore, he couldn't get lost at all...
How should he ever forget this?
Sitting on one of the large wooden tables, he opened the large blue folder in his hand and began to reread the documents. Flipped through the pages. The autopsy report he had written himself...
Yes, the reports were fine. Getting the details back into his memory. The details of the details. But it wouldn't be enough. He needed recent information, news.
And so he made his way up to the abandoned area he had been not long ago. A buddy of his friend welcomed him and walked off to get his boss.
Makki came down the stairs five minutes later, a large grin on his face.
“Oikawa! What brings you here?” Makki hugged him, patting his shoulders, "Good to see you after that party incident and everything! Up for something good again?"
The detective gave a wry smile and he first responded to the hug but then exhaled noisely.
“I need you. It’s happening again.”
Makki stared at him half-shocked.
"What do you..."
His friend didn't reply. Makki knew exactly what that was about. The way Oikawa was looking at him, the well-hidden pain in his eyes, the twitching corner of his mouth...only one person, one reason could make Oikawa be like that.
“You’re not joking, uh...” he said, searching for some important documents. Then he handed them to Tooru, as he had found them, sighing.
“That’s the report I got four years ago, when it happened. And...please be careful. Those aren't people to underestimate. They mess with you, and won’t hesitate to beat you up, as they love fights.”
“I’ll be careful, don’t worry. I have a date tonight and a place to go to afterwards” the words just slipped Oikawa's mouth.
“What?!" Makki nearly shouted, "What did you just say, you playboy?!” he exclaimed excited, wanting to know everything as he thought he had maybe misheard a word.
“Never mind, I won’t tell you!”
“Yah! Tell me everything!” Makki yelled, nudging his side lightly with laughter.
“Okay, okay!” Oikawa gave in, chuckling and lifted in hands in resignation, “It’s Hajime...Iwa-chan” he then said, when he noticed that Makki didn't recognise him for Iwaizumi's first name.
“Omg, your crush?! Oikawa, I’m so proud of you! You actually made it work for once! Good boy!” Makki exclaimed, all happy.
“I’ve never fallen in love, you know that" Oikawa smiled sheepishly to himself, somehow feeling really embarrassed but also a bit proud, because...he was right. He had made it. "But with him, everything seems perfect...too perfect...”
“Look at you, all lost for that man of yours” Makki commented, making Oikawa blush, "Have you already done it? Come on, you did, right?! Or you will tonight!"
“I’ll go now! And I won’t tell you anything!” Tooru said, sticking his tongue out.
“You little piece of shit!”
They laughed a bit, but then they got serious again.
"Oikawa...do you think that it will happen again?" Makki asked, a little bit of concern was to be heard in his voice.
"I hope not. And I'll do anything not to make it happen again" Tooru said, serious, sighing and looking determined.
Notes:
Sorryyy! Got too busy and couldn't upload the chapter before now. But hey, we're back again!!
We hope you're enjoying the adventures of our dorks, and thank you to all of you who left a comment, a kudo or just read this!! We're really thankful for everyone of you <3
Until next time!
Chapter 13: Firsts
Summary:
“And...what do you want to ask them?” Hajime seriously wanted to know, "What would be the first thing you'd like to know?”
“I’d ask them...” Tooru said first, but then paused to think a moment, “I’d ask them how did Iwa-chan fall in love with a jerk like me.”
The aliens would know the answer for sure!
“I want to know something else, too...” Tooru then got a little bit more serious, with a little melancholic expression on his face, “I’d ask them, if Heiji had forgiven me..."
Notes:
TW // NSFW , mentioned self-harm , violence
Chapter Text
Hajime had his head hung over the documents. He came across the witness reports, the one that described what had happened before the accident with the letter. Yui’s witness statement.
Then he stumbled over a statement, he couldn't remember. Someone called Takada Tadashi. Who was it?
A relative of one of the victims. Ah. The victim had been scared for three days straight and he didn't know the reason as her spouse. Then they found her dead, poisoned.
Like the one of the previous day...
Ruffling his hair, Hajime flipped through every single page and found two or three similarities, but he would need to take the whole file with him as it was simply too much to read through now in detail. And to do so, he needed official permission.
Therefore, he went to the main corridor, where the public telephone was, and asked the archivist to use it. Dialing Daichi's number then, Iwaizumi waited patiently for the police officer to pick up, while he read through another page...with the detective's name in charge on the report: Oikawa Tooru.
And his partner's one: Nakamura Heiji.
The death report.
Iwaizumi hadn't autopsied Heiji. It had been a colleague of his, because that had been the time he had to undergo treatment with Yui.
Exhaling, the forensic doctor didn't feel right about digging into that past without Tooru’s knowledge, but he needed to know. Every victim, every part...if he really wanted to solve this case with him, he needed to know.
Daichi finally picked up and after some short explanations, Iwaizumi got the permission to take the file at home. The officer would send and official signed paper to the archive and therefore, it wasn't a problem anymore.
Thanking him, Hajime hung up and...struggled with another call he had to make.
While he was waiting again, he fumbled with the edge of the wooden counter, scratching it lightly.
"Hello?"
There she was. Iwaizumi's heart skipped a little beat and he inhaled deeply before speaking.
"Yui...it’s me. I’m sorry to bother you, although you called in sick...how are you?"
He tried his best as he really didn't know how to begin, how to talk to her. An apology wasn't enough. She stayed away from work because she didn't want to see him, and there he was, intruding her private life nonetheless.
"You...really have some nerve...”
It was the first time that he heard her voice in such an angry tone.
“I know. I really do and I wouldn’t call you, if wasn't important” Hajime replied, which only made it worse.
“Of course, you wouldn’t."
Ouch.
"So, I guess it’s...case-related?!”
Yui tried to calm down, to stay composed. The forensic doctor thanked her for that in silence.
"It is. Listen, Yui...we have a problem. A real big one...”
And as he mentioned the victims, the bodies they had found last time and that day, mentioning the letter, she went totally quiet.
“I don’t want you to come here. If you had come, I would've sent you right away” he tried to reassure her, “But as it started all over and...and I don’t want to let it happen again...”
Iwaizumi exhaled and ran nervously a hand through his hair.
“I need your help. I've read through everything which had been collected. Every page, but there's nothing written down about indices, leading to the culprit. The one who sent it. Did you...remember how you got it?”
She would never forget. And therefore, she only recalled the events in her mind for a few seconds, before she spoke to him again, almost inaudibly.
“It was one of the young police officers, Nakamura-kun. I asked him to let letters directly come to our office and...that was the whole thing” her voice trembled.
“So...you did receive it by...”
“Official postage way, yes.”
Iwaizumi's eyebrows knitted.
“Was there anything suspicious, the day before or so?”
That Mori guy had clearly known how to address them properly. He had even written the room number down.
That was nothing some stranger would know. So maybe they had a mole within the team or he had just sneaked it.
“No...I don’t think so. Hajime-kun, it is so long ago...I can’t remember-“
“I know, I’m sorry” he cut in, “Yui, I’m sorry to make you go through it again.”
He heard her heavy breathing.
“No...if it means that the culprit will finally get in jail...it’s fine. You know...it’s like we're linked to each other, you gave me some of your blood plasma, and I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for you. So...if this is how I can help you...”
She tried so hard to be brave. But it was wrong...because she had suffered because of him.
“Thank you, Yui. I make sure nobody will need my blood again. Most of all for the sake of my scratched veins” he jumped on the joke train and after a short “Take care” she ended the call.
Iwaizumi grabbed everything, looking at his wrist watch.
Time to go...time to go home.
Actually, even if he had told Tooru, that it was important to set a finish line sometimes, it was hard for him to do so too.
One part of him just wanted to go for the body, wanted to start the examination immediately to rush forward, making progress. But as long as the precautions weren't set in the morgue, he had to go slow.
And go slow meant taking a break.
*
Oikawa was close to the address Makki had given him.
Of course, it wasn't an area, you would like to visit at night, alone. Even now, in the afternoon, it wasn't so comfortable at all.
The detective wasn't scared or anything, he had been in worse situations, but his instincts told him that he really had to be careful. That he shouldn't be too carefree there...
Although Japan's capital was known for better safety than in other country's, it still had its dark spots. But there, he would at least find the informations he needed.
“Walking in our territory...how careless, you brave boy!”
Oikawa smirked, coming to an hault and sighed. Looking up to the sky, he then slowly turned around.
“I didn’t know Tokyo suburbs belonged to an idiot like you, I’m so sorry” he lowered his head lightly, as to show an apology.
“Very funny, you little jerk. Tell me what'cha doing here, before I beat the shit out of ya!” the guy smirked back and let his knuckles creak.
He was a little shorter than Oikawa, but his ego was much bigger as he overestimated himself because of the muscles in his arms.
“You’re too tiny to beat me up, shortie. I’m here to talk. Just a few questions, and you’ll never see me again” Oikawa offered with a cool undertone.
“Just a few questions?” his opposite repeated with a cruel laughter and when he threw a look over his shoulder, his buddies had already appeared: five taller men, bulky types, were standing next to him like a wolf gang, also behind Oikawa, blocking his way.
There was no escape now. Cool.
“You really think you can ask us something and that we’ll answer?! Who the hell do you think you are?!”
Oikawa sighed in defeat. He knew how this would end.
Bad.
With a lot of violence he hadn't wanted to go through.
But before he could get out some words of objection, one of those guys grabbed him suddenly by the shoulder from behind. However, the detective wasn't born yesterday and he went with the motion, dodging his attack which evolved to a slight hit, making the other losing his balance.
“Listen” Oikawa tried to say, while he had to fight with another one of those guys, because they didn't want to stand still, “I want to know what happened four years ago” he kicked another buddy's ass, “I want to know why Mori is back!”
Being able to speak that out loud, he received a punch back, right in his face. Stumbling, Tooru somehow twisted his ankle and fell himself to the ground.
A little amount of blood flew down his mouth. The taste was disgusting, but he didn't care as everyone else now was frozen, hearing that name.
“What did you just say?” the bulky guy pressed, making a step towards Oikawa and looking down at him with a frightened face.
“Mori is back.”
“How did you know?!” the other exclaimed, grabbing Oikawa by his collar and pulling him up, "Are you fucking with us? I'll beat up your beautiful face!"
“He had murdered two people by now, and wants to contaminate the forensic team with some damn virus. I need your help” Oikawa wasn't easily to be impressed, staring at the guy with seriousness, "I mean it. I'm not here for joking, damn it!"
“Who the hell are you?!”
“Oikawa Tooru, detective.”
And now their eyes were all on him now.
“Are you...that Oikawa Tooru?”
“Yes.”
“I won’t help you, Mori will kill us all!” he pushed him back to the ground, then turned around on his heel, ready to finish that conversation which was bringing nothing good there.
“I-I’ll make sure that won’t happen!” Oikawa promised, while getting back on his feet.
But of course it wasn't enough. A promise by a man who worked for the police...what a joke! They even laughed at him. But it wasn't only because of his words, but also because they knew much more he thought they would.
“Are you sure you should make such promises when you let your partner die four years ago?” the bulky type, who seemed to be their boss, reminded him with a cold and mocking voice, which made Oikawa's blood boil.
No...he had to say calm. He had to get something out of them.
“I made a mistake. I won’t make it twice” he hissed.
“Your words mean absolutely nothing.”
And he walked off, not even paying attention to the brunette detective with his bleeding bottom lip, little droplets of blood on his coat. Still, he raised his voice once more for him.
"Mori has a target. He doesn’t need much to get to it, and you know that well. These murders, the virus...is just a deviation from his real target.”
“Thank you” Oikawa sighed in a relief, but too early for that.
“You should be, as I’ll make sure you won’t remember our faces, you little bastard!”
And with that his buddies got closer around Oikawa. Although he was trying to dodge the punches and the kicks, in the end he failed miserably. One against nine wasn't fair at all, but at least he had got his information. Not as much as he wanted, but still...something.
So being unable to walk, getting beaten up, this was just the price he had to pay for...
Why do they like to fight that much?! This isn’t funny at all!
*
The world turned dark, and then Oikawa reopened his eyes, finding himself on the ground. Pain started to spread through his body or maybe it had even been the pain which had let him coming back to the world again. He wasn't sure.
He heard little raindrops falling on the asphalt, the rustling of the rain. He smelt the humid, cool air, feeeling how cold his hands were.
Damn, that little shorty and his body-builder friends...
As he layed down there, all drenched wet himself, he tried to stand up. Tried to get up, but it was hard.
He needed some time to adjust his body to the pain, adjust his eyes to the blurred vision he still had.
Holding his head, he gave a snarl. It had become darker now. Evening.
“Damn, what time is it...?” he asked himself in a mumble, shook his wrist as the wrist watch was always a little bit loose and fall in the direction of his bone.
8 pm.
“Hajime...!” Tooru whispered in shock and guilty about his unforseen delay.
Damn it...he had promised him he would be back in time, but...he couldn't keep promises at all, could he? As it wasn't the first one he broke with a person.
He stood on his feet again, inhaled deeply and walked with a limping leg, tried to run every once and a while, to be faster, even if it was just a little bit.
There was no other thought in his mind than getting back to his boyfriend. Not even caring for his injuries or how much he was hurt.
Just...when Oikawa arrived at the apartment building, getting into the elevator, as someone had just come from the entrance door and therefore he wasn't in need to ring the intercom system, the detective noticed that he hadn't cleaned himseld at all. He looked so devasteded and wrecked, with all those bruises, not knowing how many he had at all.
It just hit him, after he had already knocked at Iwaizumi's door and he quickly turned aside. Trying to hide himself as much as possible, when the door opened...
For Iwaizumi it had been a hurry to get back on time, getting all the stuff in the supermarket and was a bit angry at Tooru, when he didn't stroke the clock by the second. On the other side he was glad because it meant he had even more time to prepare the little dinner. To prepare himself.
Fifteen minutes passed...he raised his eyebrows.
By thirty, he got a bit nervous.
By sixty, Iwaizumi really started worrying.
Iwaizumi jumped up, stomped to the door and opened it with much force. All his tension fell for a moment, but only after he noticed the state his boyfriend was in. Noticing the dirt and the wet spots on his coat and pants, his messy hair, Hajime was confused.
“Tooru?!”
He wasn't facing him. On purpose, for sure.
Iwaizumi took his hand, dragged him inside and closed the door, already seeing the first large violet bruise on his hand.
And then he looked up to the other.
“God...Tooru, what happened?!”
He was clearly shocked. The injuries were so much worse than the little ones because of the fight with Atsumu.
Oikawa's face was partly swollen, there were scratches, crusted blood...some of it still dripping down...how had he even made it there?!
“Okay...come, sit down!” Iwaizumi tried to keep up his composure and directed his boyfriend to the couch, “Can you take off your coat? And your shirt?”
He already guessed that there were even more bruises on Tooru than the ones he had seen. Oikawa didn't talk back at first and for a moment he just wanted to run away as he didn't want to be seen like that. But this wouldn't have been fair. Seeing those so shocked olive-green eyes of his boyfriend, all he could do was trying to belittle his situation. Not making him worry too much.
“It’s nothing, I just fell off a tree, that’s all! I had worse days!” Oikawa tried to smile, but his cracked lips hurt and he couldn't stop himself from flinching a bit.
"Stop the shit joking!" he heard Iwaizumi call over when he was going into the bathroom, bringing the first-aid kit with him and sat down next to the detective.
"Get off your coat and your shirt. Now" the forensic doctor insisted and helped him carefully out of the clothes, "You're damn wet anyway...hell..."
Mumbling he then started to treat the wounds with serious eyes. They didn't seem to be too bad, but he still asked the other if he had breathing issues or other pain he couldn't explain.
Actually, Iwaizumi would have rather brought him to the ER, having a CT and stuff...but he knew that Oikawa didn't like hospitals, and moreover he looked so damn exhausted, tired and guilty.
Hajime didn’t deserve a boyfriend like him, who was so careless, got into troubles, had an unstable life...Tooru felt so guilty right now, and he was angry to himself that he didn’t make it to 7 pm like he had promised.
“Did...someone surprise you?” Hajime tried to find a proper description.
Carefully he applied the antiseptic on a scratch on Oikawa's arm, palpating the skin around the bruises with all the accuracy a doctor would have. Oikawa flinched though.
“I went to some place to ask some drug dealers specialized in letter bombs. But...seemed that they like fighting too much,” the detective replied with sarcasm and watched the other with his occupation, “I think...I have some broken ribs...” he then added very quietly, trying to stand the pain, "Breathing is an issue...and...I’m sorry...I didn’t make it in time...”
Iwaizumi looked up with concern, also with worry - whether it was for the mentioned ribs or the apology, no one could tell.
“Then we should definitely get you an X-ray. I don’t want you to have anything stabbing your lungs...” Hajime replied quietly.
Finishing with his arm, he continued with Tooru’a face. Pausing a moment, Iwaizumi noticed how fucking sorry Oikawa was, not even looking him in the eyes anymore, and gave a silent sigh.
“It’s not that you did that on purpose. And to be honest, I’d be the one who had been on delay anyway...so, let’s skip the apologies. I’m just glad you’re here and...half-way okay. I didn't even start with dinner" he cracked a little smile to reassure his opposite, and adjusted the antiseptics on his wounds carefully.
“Still I’m really pissed about those guys who dared to set my boyfriend in such a state.”
And it was true...he never understood why people had to be violent in general, but...if it came to the one he loved, it was a total different thing. Crushing their bones would have been an option now.
When he was finished, Iwaizumi put the first-aid kit stuff aside and held Tooru’s hand carefully.
“You’re here now. You’re safe. You’re with me.” he reassured him and looked him into the eyes.
“You would have beaten them all up, I’m sure” Oikawa chuckled, but stopped the joking right after and got serious, “I’m glad you’re the one I’m here with now."
“Of course I would. I’ve had some classes during college in martial arts. At least I can hit the target” and he had proved that during the party and during the fight with Atsumu more than enough.
But hearing the little confession now, Hajime only smiled gently.
Yeah...Oikawa would have been alone, on the streets, maybe he would have made it to his apartment, but still: alone. And he wouldn't have treated the wounds properly as they both knew.
“I’m sure you cooked some delicious stuff...and I’m kinda hungry too...” as Oikawa said so, his stomach growled a little.
“Hope so...but first...”
And with that Hajime leaned in, kissing softly Tooru’s cheek. Kissing his nose. Kissing his cracked lips.
Oikawa smiled and hissed at the same time, as it still hurt a bit, but looked up when a very gently whispered “Welcome home” got to the detective's ear.
Iwaizumi stood up to get the food ready, telling his boyfriend just to sit down and wait for him. A fast reheat, as the table was already set with plates, glasses, etc. - and then they could finally rest.
"Oh, wait a moment" Iwaizumi then said and stopped in his movement to sit down.
He got to the drawer, taking out three candles to put them inside the plain chandelier on the table.
"As you said, I'm such a romantic."
Sitting down, Oikawa was now able to look at the prepared dinner: some casserole, but also two little side dishes as an appetizer and...he also chose a soft going wine - if Tooru liked. Else, he had other beverages. Telling him this, the detective smiled and chirped.
“Iwa-chan, you’re sooo sweet~ Did you prepare all of this...only because I was coming over?” he asked out of curiosity, but had a gentle expression written all over his face.
“Of course” Iwaizumi answered honestly, “And...it’s pretty rare. Inviting someone over, I mean. You know, work is too much, keeps me busy...but as I have a boyfriend now...”
The forensic doctor smirked with a slight blush on his face, and he looked at Tooru, who kept watching him while he was serving the meal on the plates, “Guess I can revive my hobby a little bit more often, hm?"
Oikawa looked up, all surprised by that revealed little secret and he blinked in anticipation. Having a boyfriend who was good at cooking? What a win!
“And moreover...I want you to have something else to look forward to, to feel comfortable with" Hajime poured then some wine in their glasses, "But most of all...I also want to spend more private time with you, Tooru.”
His name left Iwaizumi's lips so tenderly, that Oikawa got the chills all over his body. Getting goosebumps, he glanced away, clearly blushing.
“Stop it, Iwa-chan...I might die because of your cuteness...!” he mumbled, making the other laugh a bit.
"Cuteness?" the forensic doctor blushed himself a bit. As nobody else had ever told him that.
Cute...he?
He shook his head lightly and they started to eat.
It didn't need long, until Oikawa was showing his happiness, as his eyes lit up with every bite he took.
“This...is so delicious, Iwa-chan!” he exclaimed all happily, and ate even a bit faster, as it was soo good.
He hadn’t had a proper meal at home for a long time now. He always ate outside, at Osamu’s, but it wasn't the same like...eating at home. With someone you love.
“I’m glad you like it” Iwaizumi smiled back, “I make sure, you’ll get more in future!”
Grinning, he shove in a spoonful, but had just to glance over again, smirking widely, “Recall once more who’s the cute one here!” he grinned, putting his chin in his hand.
“I’ve never seen someone enjoying food like this. It’s like the sunshine which brightens the day” Hajime chuckled.
Oikawa lifted his arm a bit and pointed with his index at Iwaizumi, suddenly touching his nose, as the doctor blinked at him.
“Look who’s the sunshine here! I’m sure you’re some sort of alien, because you've abducted my heart!" Tooru said, still smirking, but his eyes were speaking all the love he felt for the other.
Damn it. Hajime got startled. He felt like his heart was about to explode. Unsteady beat, raising the heat in his entire body. Swallowing, he still didn't know how to respond.
“Godzilla. I don’t need the brain manipulation part, because you fell for me like I did for...Godzilla.”
Lame. So lame.
Iwaizumi had to look aside and then...began to laugh. From the bottom of his heart, he laughed it all out. And he wasn't the only one, as the detective first looked at him, but had to join him and had to hold back his tears.
“You’re seriously into that lame dinosaur?! I thought you were a cool man, Iwa-chan!”
“That’s not a dinosaur!!" Iwaizumi laughed louder, "And I proudly show you how much I’m into that cool stuff!”
Crumpling the paper napkin, he threw it into Oikawa's direction, but missed him. Then almost coughing and chocking, he took a sip of his wine and smirked.
“Godzilla will come at you straightforwardly and you know what to expect, whereas aliens...isn’t it scary that they could do everything with you without you even knowing it?!”
He glanced over and yes, he wanted to discuss that silly liking of them with the detective.
“If you show me that disgusting extinct dinosaur, I’ll show you how much cooler aliens are!” Oikawa stuck his tongue out, “That’s exactly because you don’t know what you can expect from them!! And isn’t it great that we aren’t the only ones in this universe?! They may be living in some sort of star or planet and I want surely go and visit them if they'll come here too!”
He was somehow too excited about that stuff. Like a...five-year-older, but he didn't care. And neither did Iwaizumi. He actually listened to him, watching him being all so excited about fictional stuff.
“Then I'll show you a lot!” Iwaizumi laughed, but listened carefully. Looking at Oikawa, how his eyes all sparkled, his wide gestures, how amazed he was.
Beautiful.
“And...what do you want to ask them?” Hajime seriously wanted to know, "What would be the first thing you'd like to know?”
“I’d ask them...” Tooru said first, but then paused to think a moment, “I’d ask them how did Iwa-chan fall in love with a jerk like me.”
Looking Iwaizumi into his eyes, he blushed shyly and looked at his plate. Tooru still couldn't understand that, he couldn't imagine someone to be in love with him.
Yes, he was handsome, but Iwaizumi had fallen for his personality.
The aliens would know the answer for sure!
“I want to know something else, too...” Tooru then got a little bit more serious, with a little melancholic expression on his face, “I’d ask them, if Heiji had forgiven me..."
Lowering his gaze, he felt how guilt crawled out of his bones. Thinking of Heiji, when he was with Hajime wasn't right.
He shouldn't live in the past, but he wanted someone, needed that someone, to tell him that Heiji had forgiven him, that he was fine, that it hadn't been his fault that he had died.
The second question let Iwaizumi took his hand, holding it tight and although he searched for a good way to reply to that, he wasn't able to. Not yet.
Having finished their meals, he stood up, but didn't let go of the other's hand. He walked over, standing right next to him now, and went down on his knees. Looking up to Tooru, resting his other hand on the detective’s thigh, he waited until he had his attention.
“I haven’t met Heiji but...he seemed to have some contact with Yui before. And I’m pretty sure she would have told me, if he was an angry guy who would hold a grudge or anything. She didn’t, and so, first of all, I don’t think that he wouldn’t forgive you. Second...more importantly, do you think he had ever blamed you? Be honest. Shut out what you think. What would he want you to do?! What would he tell you? You don’t have to answer me, just think about it” Hajime spoke very calmly and stroked Oikawa's thigh reassuringly, giving him a little encouraging smile as he didn't want to see him with that sad expression again.
And yeah...Oikawa had to admit that Heiji would have never blamed him. He would say: What are you doing? Get up already, you’re stronger than this. Stop blaming yourself you overdramatic jerk.
So...it wasn't his former partner who was blaming him. It was himself.
He couldn't forgive himself for what he had done to him. Lowering his hands, Tooru's grip tightened as he was so utterly frustrated and angry at himself.
“He...sounded like a good guy" Iwaizumi smiled sadly, whispering his words.
Cupping Oikawa’s cheek with his hand, he got to his feet again and pulled him close, letting him rest his head against his stomach. Stroking through this soft brunette hair.
“Tooru...you are strong. Let me tell you this...despite all the blame you put on your shoulders, you’re standing here. With me."
Iwaizumi caressed him gently, looking down to him, "You allowed yourself to love. And that was the right decision...no matter what your mind tells you, you feel that it’s right. Just...the acceptance to go on, live like everybody else...that is something that cannot be done so easily.”
It wasn't that Oikawa didn't know. He knew well enough that he wasn't as weak as he was feeling.
But right the acceptance of the past was something he couldn't do. Not at all.
“You know,” Tooru began, still hiding his face in Hajime's chest, “I continued to live only because I had one last thing to do for Heiji: find his murderer and arrest him. After that...I didn't know what to do. But now..." Oikawa smiled secretly, "An amazing man named Iwaizumi Hajime crossed my path, and is waiting for me every day, loving me, so...I guess I can’t disappoint him!” he said, and looked slowly up to that wonderful man he was allowed to meet.
“Is that so? What...that Iwaizumi guy must be a lucky man, huh” Hajime murmured with his little smirk, while stroking over the other's hairline.
Relief showed itself when he heard that last sentence...because he could understand Tooru's thoughts, his feelings. Not on the same level, but that was something he understood too well.
“He sure is, he is so lucky to have me as his boyfriend, you know?” Oikawa continued with the joke and chuckled lightly.
“Yeah I see that. He's really lucky.”
“And I’m even luckier to have him as my love” he added quietly then, looking into Hajime’s olive-green eyes now.
“I want to kiss you so much right now, but you’d be disgusted by my still injured lips and my look. Ah...guess the swelling is as bad as it feels. I can’t even keep my left eye open properly...” Tooru struggled and sighed.
But of course Hajime wasn't disgusted at all. He only bent down a bit and kissed Tooru carefully on the forehead.
“Do you really think that this would stop me from kissing and loving you?” he asked with a smirk, “But I’m more concerned about the pain you feel...and we certainly should try to reduce that swelling. I have some aspirin I can give you. It'll also may help for your other pain.”
Still, his fingertips danced tenderly across Oikawa's cheeks, distracting him a bit from the wounds which might hurt.
“The only medicine I need is you, Hajime” Tooru whispered softly, kissing the hand that was holding him so dear, that gave him so much affection, that touched him so tenderly.
And he truly meant it, it wasn't a mere pick-up line. Hajime was the one that made his pain and bad thoughts go away at the same moment. Tooru looked at him.
“Now stop with the doctor thing and kiss me already.”
And Iwaizumi could only give a light chuckle, as his heart jumped up to that invitation.
“Ah, believe me, you’ll develop a doctor kink.”
He leaned in and kissed Oikawa with all the love he could afford, not in need to be asked a second time.
He held him close, as Iwaizumi's tongue caressed softly the upper lip.
Without words, he pulled Oikawa up, led him to a much more comfortable place in his apartment than the dining table for sharing kisses and touches.
“You’re such a perv, Iwa-chan~” Tooru teased him, when he noticed that they went right to the bedroom.
It didn't kept him away from kissing him. He didn't care about his pain, because he felt none under the satisfaction.
He sucked on Iwaizumi's bottom lip, nibbled with his teeth on it, while the shorter male's tongue continued to request entering. Tooru allowed him to do so, moaning quietly the moment Iwaizumi’s tongue met up with his own. That felt good. Pretty good.
“Why am I?” Iwaizumi mumbled, getting goosebumps because of that sound of arousal, and a little smirk curled up his mouth corners, “Because I don’t hide that I love kissing and touching you? And wanna do this somewhere more comfortable?”
He made it sound all reasonable, but was already occupied with Tooru’s lips again and got into a slow dance with their tongues, which stopped the forensic doctor's talking.
He pulled Oikawa closer, didn't want any space between them. Just wanted to feel everything of Tooru, every move, every touch, his warmth.
“Then...” Oikawa started, smiling in between the kisses, “Don’t stop.”
His hands slid under Hajime’s shirt, feeling his bare and toned skin.
And God, it sent Iwaizumi so many chills, having those slim fingers on his body. So much, that he even forgot how to breathe, as that sentence got finally into his brain. Swallowing, his own hands got a little bit shaky, but the so far built-up anticipation turned into pure excitement.
This time, it was no accidentally touch of bare skin Tooru let them experience. It was on purpose.
Iwaizumi got the idea how he had felt when he had caressed the naked skin of his waist last time...warmth became heat, heat became fire and it was set right into his heart, spreading through his whole body and a mixture of warm and cold shivers were sent up and down his spine.
It felt so nice, so right...as if Tooru’s hands were meant to be on his skin like that. No where else.
“So I won’t...” Hajime managed to say with a hoarse voice, followed by a low groan deep down from his throat, as the soft strokes of fingertips continued, because they were exploring his chest now.
Iwaizumi didn't want to be unoccupied, needed to do something to get a grip of himself. Therefore, his lips searched for more, tracing down the way from Oikawa's lips to his neck, where his scent was mid-strongest, and started nibbling and carefully biting from time to time.
Oikawa felt the heat rushing, the pit in his gut growing, and he was sure that Hajime would leave some marks on his neck...
Marks, he didn't mind.
“You know” Tooru began, when they caught some breath and stopped for a moment in his movements, so Iwaizumi was able to listen now, not being distracted by more touches.
"The day you brought me to your secret spot...when we looked at the stars together, I made a wish. I asked the stars 'Please, let Iwa-chan find his true love' because I really wanted you to have something I could never have. But...”
He inhaled and went on, “I would have never imagined that your true love was me...”
Iwaizumi released himself from the other's, looking at how the spots he had kissed changed to a reddish colour, and then he looked slowly up.
“You...already cared so much about me...” Hajime replied with a sincere expression, as he nearly drowed into Tooru’s hazlebrown eyes, “I just hoped...that stargazing would somehow cheer you up. Give you some distraction and...maybe also hoping for making some memories together.”
Admitting all this kind of stuff, remembering that night and his own breakdown, remembering the moment Oikawa had stood next to him, his following words were only a whisper.
“Tooru...the moment you looked up...it was the most beautiful sight I've ever seen. You were and are the most beautiful person I've ever seen...” His gaze lowered but a sweet smile spread over his face, "And...the only person I’ve really felt drawn to...”
Slowly, Hajime leaned in, pushing Tooru carefully backwards on the mattress as he had done it already once, and looked at him in pure endearment.
“The only person...who let my heart to fall out of rhythm so much...” bending down, Hajime gave a little peck on Tooru’s lips.
“And the only person who let me wish to love him with all I have. Love and worship him. So much, that I can’t stop myself from thinking of kissing and touching you. Feeling you...I love you, Tooru...I love you so much...”
His hands had found his boyfriend’s ones, intertwining them as he went for another kiss, a much more passionate one.
But all Tooru could do was melting into his kisses, his heart just beating faster, because Hajime was the one he wanted by his side.
Right at this moment, and forever. And no one would ever change that.
“I love you...Haji...you’re my favorite star...” Tooru whispered, almost drowning into a sleepy state.
The warmth of Hajime's arms, the warmth of his love. The kisses. The breathelessness. His racing and excited heart.
And the events of the last days...it was all too much for his body.
Hajime smirked at that cute compliment, but kissed him softly goodnight.
It was not a surprise for him, that Tooru drifted asleep easily.
So he just layed down with him, after having a quick check on the candles, at least bringing the dishes to the sink and switching off the lights.
Getting back to bed, lifting the blanket and pulling it over them, Iwaizumi couldn't find sleep so fast, because of his wild pounding heart.
What Tooru did to him...that was nothing to compare with anything before.
Holding him in his arms, watching him sleeping, his peaceful expression and caressing the soft curls of his hair and his cheek...
“How could I not fall in love with you, when you’re just like this?”
*
Hajime hadn't set the alarm clock that time, so waking up happened in a more gentle way than any other day. He just opened his eyes half-way, and closed them again when they met the sunlight rays, and snuggled up with the person next to him.
Cuddling with Tooru. A soft shuffling of the blanket, when he did so.
“Are you...awake?” Hajime mumbled, his words muffled in the soft brunette curls, his nose and lips were hiding.
“I am" Tooru replied in a whisper, "I was just staring at my cute boyfriend who slept with that horrible Dinozilla sweater...”
Hiding his own face in Hajime’s neck, leaving a soft kiss which made the other chuckle and shiver, the latter still could feel Tooru's smile on his skin.
“We still have to discuss your taste...”
Sliding his hand under the blanket, Hajime wrapped his lover carefully into his embrace, pulling him closer and entangling their legs with each other.
“How are you feeling?” Hajime asked as quietly as before, caressing Tooru’s back softly under his shirt with long strokes.
“A bit dizzy but fine, because you’re with me” Tooru replied sweetly and inhaled Hajime's scent deeply, letying it get to his mind and heart.
He enjoyed the physical affection he was receiving, the goosebumps, the sensation. How much he loved him. How much he loved spending time with him like this, not caring for anything else than themselves...but they still had work to do.
Hajime nodded lightly to his answer and kissed the top of his head. Then he lifted himself a bit to look at the other, giving a short observation.
“You...look better than yesterday,” he stated, “but I’ll still get you a X-ray of your ribs.”
Tracing up his spine, Hajime smiled and kissed the tip of Tooru's nose. The detective wasn't so fond of it, because he didn't want to get any kind of treatment in the hospital, but he knew it was necessary. His ribcage still hurt and breathing deeply did so, too.
It was for the better, it was about being responsible with his own body, and this was something Tooru definitely had to learn and wanted to: taking better care of himself, since he wasn't alone anymore.
Since he didn't want to worry Hajime.
“In for a shower?!” Hajime asked him nonchalantly.
Maybe, the forensic doctor was teasing him. Maybe, he meant it. Tooru's eyebrows lifted. He couldn't tell.
Hajime put on his best pokerface and as much as his eyes sparkled, it could also be just because of the feelings he had for him.
“When I said you were a perv, I wasn’t joking” Tooru replied as dryly as he could, sitting up now and hiding his smirk, as he turned away.
His words had their effect on the shorter male, who was almost shocked now, somehow embarrassed with a pinkish tint on his cheeks.
"What?!" Hajime exclaimed, while swallowing down the true desire behind his words, “I’m not!” he stated, almost sounding like a five-year-old.
Swinging his legs out of bed, he mumbled something inaudible and tried to wipe off the blush in his face with composure.
“You can go first. I’ll prepare some breakfast for us."
Maybe he wanted to prove that Tooru was wrong. That he hadn't intended something like that.
However, as much as Hajime could see through him, Tooru could do the same with Hajime. And so he grabbed his hand, before the forensic doctor could leave the bedroom.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Tooru looked at him with half-closed eyes, smirking, “Bathroom was on the left, mhm?”
Not waiting for a response, he dragged Hajime with him. The latter's eyes went wide. His heart almost skipped a beat, as the door closed behind them, standing there in the tiled room.
“D-do you really...I-I mean...i-is it okay?!” Hajime didn't want to chicken out, but Tooru had just really surprised him.
“You’re the one who asked me that, but if you’re uncomfortable with it...”
It would never be an intention of him to make Hajime feel uncomfortable with anything.
“N-no!!” the forensic doctor almost blurted. Noticing his sudden outburst, he ran his free hand through his bed-styled hair, looking aside, “No...I...I’d really like that...if it’s okay for you, I mean...”
Glancing over to Tooru with hesitance, he gave him a wry smile.
“There’s no way...I’d feel uncomfortable around you.”
Of course, he was a little bit excited - who would not be?! - but stepped forward now, as he saw Tooru's upcoming smile on his lips. Cupping his cheek with his hands, Hajime just stopped in front of those beautiful lips, looking down to them.
“I’d...really love to take a shower with you.”
His voice sounded more secure now, much more self-confident.
Tooru liked it, but he himself felt a bit anxious right at the moment it was sealed. Trying to play it cool, calming down his pounding heart, he went for another joke.
“Well...then I’m sorry you have to see my body ruined by these damn scratches and bruises for the first time...I swear I’m gorgeous!”
“Don’t you worry. There'll be many more chances to be blended by your fair, pale, royalist-like complexion” Hajime laughed, but then nodded, as Tooru asked for permission to remove his shirt.
Lifting his arms over his head, the sweater left his body within seconds and fell to the ground.
With a lowered gaze, smirking, Hajime then shoved his hands under the hem of Tooru’s shirt and was also about to take it off, slowly.
“Just to make things clear...you’re already more than gorgeous” Hajime muttered quietly, pulling the fabric over Tooru’s head, his eyes already wandering downwards from the detective's neck on.
The bruises didn't look so good. His fingers reached around Tooru's chest, to his back, stroking over it. He felt the shape of the edgy shoulder blades, every vertebra that he merely touched ith his fingertips. And the bare skin...God...just this.
“Haji...you’re tickling me!” Tooru had to laught.
But then his hand wandered through the lace of Hajime’s pants, as if asking him to take them off already.
Hajime chuckled, kissing him as an apology behind his ear.
“Sorry...wasn’t on purpose” he whispered, looking at Tooru in the eye and giving him his okay to go on.
Helping him, he shuffled the long pants off, kicked them out of the way and trailed with his fingertips the way down from Tooru’s back, even daring to slid his fingertips beneath the sweater pants, teasing the upper part of his bottom.
“May I?”
“Mhm~” Tooru hummed, already blushing, as his eyes were locked on Iwaizumi’s body and thighs.
God, he was so damn handsome. He was...doing some weightlifting, wasn't he? At least, some proper body workout. His pectorals and abs were so well defined. His arms as well. And hell, he even had a delicate waistline.
It made Tooru feel thirsty, but he couldn't hide it as much as he wanted, because Hajime noticed his observant eyes.
“Guess that means...you like what you see?”
The shorter male couldn't hide a little blush himself, as he had never been looked at like that before. Surely, the girls had given him attention and let him feel attracted, but not...like this.
Removing Tooru's pants, he bent down a little while during so, the right height to leave soft kisses on the other’s less defined abs. He then covered the bruises with his healing lips, kissing them, and s thetopping on the collarbone with a sweet smile.
Oikawa shivered with every single touch, feeling the rising pit in his guts again. Why was Hajime so perfect, so gentle with him?! He just...couldn’t handle it.
Being on eye-level now, Tooru just kissed him back, trying to follow through with gentless, but the deep desire within let him shuffle his body more against Hajime's, letting him being more passionate.
Hajime welcomed him more than gladly in his arms, holding him closer, allowing him to deepen the kiss and tilted his head to the right angle, making their lips fitting even better together.
His eyes were closed, as he wanted to feel it as much as possible. Blending out the sight, so his other senses could have it all.
He felt how intensely his own heart was beating against his chest now. How it nearly wanted to break out his chest to get connected with Tooru's.
Everything was just so perfect...but Hajime suddenly flinched a little bit.
Tooru was brushing his fingertips on his arms.
Hajime had completely forgotten. It was a part of his body he hadn't talked about.
There were some straight, lighter stripes of scars right under the left crook of his arm. Almost invisible.
His eyes flickered to Tooru who had broken the kiss now and knitted his eyebrows.
Hajime wrapped his arm more round his lover, whose hands had traced up automatically, as he deepened the kiss.
“What are these, Hajime...?” the detective asked with concern, bringing back Hajime's arms to the front and staring at the scars.
What happened to my Iwa-chan...? Who dared to ruin his beautiful skin?!
Hajime swallowed, anxiety crawling up within him. His body felt like sweating.
Was it that visible? Had he been just too used to it that he didn't take notice, other people could still have a clear look?
His expression got a little bit tense. But he couldn't hide it anymore, could he?
Not, when Tooru had already seen them. Not when he had seen Tooru's worried eyes.
“Guess...it’s my turn to ask you not to judge me...” Hajime murmured after a sigh and clearly needed some courage to speak up, “It’s okay now, really. Just so you know. That is over.”
He first wanted to make that promise, so that the other wouldn't have anything to worry about. But of course, Tooru's concerned look meant he had to explain more.
“It was me. I did it myself" Hajime admitted, "Remember that I knew how antidepressants work?”
An insecure smile cracked up as his voice got a bit too high-pitched, “I had to take them for several reasons. One...was because of my mom. Second...due to prevent me of self-harming. I was just seventeen around that time. So...I tried differently. Not the best idea, it was a shitty time.”
Hajime had sounded so composed and calm, but his gaze had lowered while talking. He clearly was still ashamed of that.
He knew well enough that it hadn't solved anything, even back then. But once starting with it, feeling a little pain was better than feeling nothing. Or the desperation he had kept inside him, although he had known, that harming himself wouldn't help at all.
And maybe that was, why he still felt so ashamed he had ever dared to...
“Hajime” Tooru's voice reached out to him, bringing him back to reality. Still he didn't want to look at him.
“Hajime, look at me” Tooru said again, cupping his sad face with his hands and lifting it up, so he finally made eye-contact.
“It’s all over now, okay? You said it. It was too much for you back then. Too much to handle," he repeated Hajime's own words quietly, rubbing with his thumbs over the cheekbones, "You overcame it in the best way, so you shouldn't feel ashamed or blame yourself for it. As you told me I shouldn't do with myself too. I mean...look where you are now!"
A little encouraging smile left Tooru's lips, “You’re the strongest man I’ve ever known. Nobody can change that, not even some mere scars that belong to the past!”
Taking Hajime's hand, he lift his arm a bit, kissing carefully over the scars, then looked at him in the eyes again and noticed how Hajime's facial expression changed. From a melancholic, guilty one to a much more overwhelmed, grateful one.
“You’re unbelievable...” he finally murmured, as Tooru even kissed the spots he had never shown to anyone, “You’re...such an impressive...unbelievable, extraordinary man...”
A light chuckle of relief left his throat, and for a moment he leaned in, leaning his forehead on Tooru’s shoulder.
“Do you know...how relieving it is to be able to talk about it after all these years? Someone...listening to all that happened?” Hajime whispered, holding on to him, “I can’t thank you enough...”
“Yeah, I can imagine" Tooru smiled with a long exhale, squeezing him gently and feeling their hearts beating in sync, "And you don’t even have to thank me, because I’ll listen to your every single word. Because I’ll always be here. I belong by your side, Hajime..."
“As I belong to you, Tooru.”
Blushin a little, Hajime inhaled the comforting scent deeply.
It sounds like a lifelong vow.
Tooru also wanted to head to this vow, making it come true. Truly belonging to Hajime.
Maybe it was stupid. Maybe it was unreasonable to say, but he just felt it. If it didn't work out with Hajime, it would never work with anyone else.
“Shall we...go for the shower then?” the shorter male requested, as he had calmed down now and straightened up. Tooru nodded, but shot a quick glance down.
“We still have a little problem here” the detective said, completely cool, and Hajime just had his hand on the switch for the shower, not getting what the other tried to tell him.
“What do you mean?”
Did he miss something? Anything wrong? Was his head already so much in the clouds, that he had forgotten something important?
His love only smirked for a moment in silence, then pointed with his finger to Hajime's and his own boxers.
"Are we going to keep them?”
Innocent. So fucking innocent, that Hajime stared at him in disbelief and ended in an embarrassed chuckle.
“Oh my, Tooru...you caught me” he laughed light-heartedly, and lowered his hand from the switch to Tooru's hips, “Then... may I?”
Tooru's eyes followed the strong hands, having the warm palms on his pelvis now. Nodding, he tried not to look too excited. And so, Hajime’s hands slid carefully and slowly under the hem of the underwear. Striping it down, inch by inch and feeling more and more.
That skin...so soft...
He couldn't resist caressing the beautiful shaped butt cheeks thet were revealed now. Looking intensively into Tooru’s chocolate brown irises, he lost himself in the intimacy. Tooru closed his eyes, just enjoying that touch, allowing Hajime to explore that part of his body too. And then, with a quiet rustle, the boxers fell down to Tooru's ankles.
It was Hajime’s turn then, but he didn’t have to ask at all, because their eyes communicated with each other too well.
Doing the same now, striping the other’s boxers down, Tooru was then...just staring too much. Obivously staring.
“Hajime...” those three syllables came breathless over his lips, “You’re...too beautiful...” he barely managed to say, muttering it into the other's ear as he couldn't speak louder anymore, as his excitement took the lead in his voice.
Hajime swallowed, turning all red, the took the courage to pull him close, their hips touching each other now, feeling each other's entire body.
They stood just like that, embracing each other, getting in terms with the sensation. But all of a sudden the water of the shower began to fall on them, mostly on Oikawa who was right under the stream.
He gasped, feeling the cold water hitting his skin until it finally became warm. Staring with wide eyes at Hajime, who wore a mischievous look on his face, it was clear who was to be blamed for that!
“You’re...such a meanie!! Mean Iwa-chan!” Tooru tried to sound upset and offended, turning his back to Hajime.
Was it meant to be a punishment? Having a wonderful view on Tooru's back and butt? The grin on Hajime's face widened.
“Sorry, my fingers slipped” he suppressed a chuckle and fell silent again.
He was too busy watching how Tooru's muscles contracted, how the water pearls ran over his shoulders, the shoulder blades...everything. Hajime turned the water to a comfortable temperature and then just stepped forward and rested his hands on the other’s waist. He leant in and kissed the wet shoulders and the hairline of his neck. Kissing up to his ear, he bit it softly.
“If I can have that beautiful view on you...I’ll be mean everytime” Hajime muttered seductively, hands stroking forward to Tooru’a chest and caressing the tender skin.
“Mind if I...wash your back?” he asked in a hoarse voice, reaching now with one hand to the shower gel that stood in the shower caddy.
Hajime’s touch always sent shivers down Tooru’s spine. He tried to hold back, melting into his touch.
“Mhm~” Tooru just hummed back, as Hajime's touch already sent him new shivers all over his body.
Hajime took a washing cloth, moving it in circles. He just really wanted to do this, but after he reached Tooru’s lower back, it became much more difficult to stay composed.
He felt it in his own lower region. Felt it everywhere. The crackling atmosphere, his mind getting a bit dizzy.
Hajime turned Tooru gently around, facing him now directly, as he proceeded. With slow and almost teasing strokes, he moved over the other's forearm, to his shoulders, to his chest, to his stomach, back up again and then...he couldn't help it, but slid down with his hands over Tooru’s sides, leaning in to kiss him all passionately, with so much longing and out of pure happiness.
Holding him close, his fingers caressed his boyfriend’s body with all sensitivity, and he so wanted to touch him more. He wanted to feel him more, so much more.
“I love you...I...love you...” Hajime mumbled, totally love-drunk, shuffling his leg subconsciously between Tooru’s, grabbing his bottom with love and desire.
He almost got lost in that stream of emotions.
Suddenly, Hajime backed away, just a few inches, panting after he broke the kiss they'd shared.
“S-sorry” he mumbled, red from ear to ear, and clearly not only from the water temperature, “I-I...”
Got turned on way too well!
He turned slightly away, because he didn't want to make Tooru feel uncomfortable, as his blood had rushed down his body. He didn't want to make him feel that at all.
But he already had. It was a little surprise for the detective finding out how much impact he had on Hajime. How half-hard the forensic doctor had already become only by kissing him.
And then, a little idea crossed his mind.
Tooru's hands traced down Hajime's shoulders, to his chest and followed the invisible route to his lower abdomen. Going with it, Tooru knelt down in front of the other, his eyes linked with the olive-green ones that couldn't believe what his bodyfriend was doing there.
How...much of an indescribable yearning lingered into Tooru's eyes.
Tooru himself was hungry. Hungry for Hajime's love, for Hajime himself, for all the things he had never experienced before.
Maybe he didn't know exactly how to do that, but it wouldn't hurt to find out. And as curious as the detective usually was, he would do it with all his passion.
God, Tooru looked so good, so pretty...
Hajime pressed his lips together, when he watched Tooru breaking the eye-contact and opening his mouth enough to let his tongue running over his cock's shaft slowly. Feeling his heart skipping another beat, feeling how his body was overwhelmed by starting stimulation, Hajime found support on the wall behind him. Tooru looked up with half-closed eyes and a little smirk.
After making sure that Hajime was mentally prepared, Tooru finally took him in. He closed his lips around the twitching member in his hand, letting him experience his warm and wet cavity. Carefully, he swirled over the sensitive head with his tongue, trying to make his love feel good.
He succeeded well enough, as it didn't take long, until Hajime let out a moan of arousal. His hand found shelter in Tooru's hair, grabbing it slightly, sometimes harder, never letting him go.
He didn't need to guide him, maybe just a bit to get him into rhythm. But just seeing him doing this, devouring him with all he had...
He really...oh my God...Tooru...
Hajime felt more than chills, it was better than anytime before. Better than fucking girls or having them trying to satisfy him. His whole body seemed to burn under Tooru's touches.
Biting his bottom lip, he kept watching how the other male took him in, how he kept his eyes locked with Hajime’s.
Why is that...so hot...?!
A deeper groan escaped his throat, and Hajime closed his eyes, leaning his head on his shoulder. Panting, he pet the detective's head, giving him some assurance, some gratitude for what he was doing. His boyfriend’s lips around his member was all he wanted to feel now.
Hajime couldn't control himself anymore, when Tooru was bobbing his head back and forth, and with every forward motion, his hips jerked a bit. Still, Hajime tried to keep the thrusting low, as he didn't want Tooru to gag, but it was hard. Even more difficult, when he felt how deep the detective could go.
His mind spinned, wondering what else he could do with him. What he wanted to do with him. How he wanted to do him...
“T-Tooru...mhm...”
Muffled noises became loud moans. Suppressed sounds turned into low tuned groans. His flat breathing and his trembling hands caressing Tooru’s hair were proof that the latter was doing more than good. Hajime’s fingers clenched his hair much more, as he felt the upcoming ecstasy. His hips jolted in rhythm to Tooru’s movements.
“G-god...t-that feels...you’re so good...you're so goddamn good...I-I’m..."
He was already so close to the edge.
Tooru hummed happily, hearing that his Iwa-chan felt so much pleasure under him. He wouldn't let him be unsatisfied, and continued with more passion this time.
Hajime’s cock hit repeatedly his throat, it made him sometimes almost choke, but feeling his fingertips messing with his hair, Tooru reminded himself to relax. When he relaxed, it was easier. Sucking on the tip now, having the throbbing member in his hand and mouth, he knew that Hajime was so close to fall...
Opening his eyes again, the forensic doctor looked at Tooru, at how intensely he was doing him.
It was too much...just too much. How deep he had him, and his devouring humming, Tooru's own moaning, as got turned on too just by doing this...
“T-Tooru-!!" it was all, Hajime could exhale in the second, as he felt the sudden explosion of pleasure.
His vision went white for a few seconds, and his limbs got shaky. Coming down Tooru's throat, feeling how the other swallowed him, licking him all up, he almost forgot how breathing worked.
Looking at Tooru, who just licked some of the cum that was eascaping from his bottom lip, Hajime was at a loss of words.
The detective stood up, chuckling a bit to cover up his own embarrassment. He leant in and his hot breath left another chill, meeting Hajime's ear.
“You’re so big...I’m sorry, I got too carried away.”
It made Hajime turn dark-red.
He can’t just say that now!
Damn it...he was such a mess. Tooru made such a mess out of him! His limbs still felt wobbly and his mind was so blank. Having his back pressed against the wet tiles for support, Hajime tried to think of an answer. Anything.
“N-no...i-it’s me who...started that, somehow...”
Because he couldn't hold himself back with the kissing and touching and...shit, Tooru had looked so good, so fine down there on his knees.
Running a hand through his hair, Hajime lifted Tooru’s chin with trembling fingers, finding some of composure again.
“But, just tell me once more...who is the perv? Swallowing all so eagerly?”
He was teasing him. Iwaizumi Hajime, moaning his name so passionately, was now teasing him!
Tooru almost wanted to pout, when he noticed the lovely smile which showed how much he appreciated that special treatment. That he didn't take it for granted, especially because he felt the detective's own little-big problem there, as his erection was throbbing and craving for attention.
The taller man glanced away, ashamed that he couldn't hide it.
“You got so turned on too?”
Hajime whispered his words now, while his hand was reaching downwards, from Tooru's waist to his hip, to the centre, carefully closing around the throbbing member and caressing the full length with some light pressure.
“Should I...make you feel good too? As a reward for that more than excellent job you did on me?” if he wanted, Hajime could play a bit with his voice.
Tooru's length twitched under Hajime’s touch, and a soft moan escaped his lips before he could say anything. Hajime took that as a Yes.
His eyes laid observant on Tooru’s face, as he started to give his cock more attention, massaging it in a constant rhythm and emphasising through his thumb on top. Tooru's hands clenched on Hajime's shoulders, searching for something to hold on as the moans got louder, right into his ear.
When Hajime was reassured that his love felt more than just a little bit of pleasure, his lips travelled their way over Tooru's body, stopping on his chest to take in the pinkish soother, sucking it lightly and curling his tongue around it.
“Feeling good?” Hajime dared to ask, puffing a shot of air against his nipple.
Looking up with a lewd expression, Hajime smiled, focusing on the tip and the slit of the other’s member.
Even if he never made out with a man before...he sure knew what can feel good or gives more excitement.
“Mmm~ more than good...” Tooru moaned all the way.
“Ha-Haji...!” he then exclaimed loudly, clearly on his edge, as he had already been so turned on and Hajime doing him now in a little rougher way didn't let him escape.
Rolling his hips in the same pace and pattern, he inhaled sharply as his pleasure suddenly overwhelmed him. His nails digged into the wet skin of his lover, who was so full of lust himself, enjoying how the little pain hit him as Tooru grabbed him too strongly. He rode him through his orgasm, holding him as Tooru came into his hand, as Tooru's body became weaker.
God...we didn't even make it seriously...
Tooru breathed heavily, and looked at his partner, smiling a bit through his exhaustion.
“I love you...I love you so much, Haji...”
Removing carefully his hand, the evidences of their make out got washed away by the water in an instant, but the love and emotions they felt stayed there. Hajime also smiled slightly, leaning in to touch Tooru’s nose with his own.
"I love you too, Tooru...I love you so much...with all I have."
Chapter Text
“I have to go to Makki. To tell him about...what happened yesterday. Maybe I can get more information” Tooru announced, when they stood outside Hajime's apartment and looked up slowly, smiling slightly, almost shyly. But then leaning in, he gave his lovely boyfriend a long-lasting kiss on the cheek.
"Okay..." Hajime nodded, holding still, but that peck wasn't enough for him. So he shoved his hand under Tooru's coat, to his back and bent down with him a bit.
Laying in his arms now, he kissed the other once more, full of love and passion. Maybe it looked a little bit dramatically, but...he couldn't help it. When he was with him, he wanted nothing else than being like that: extreme. Doing all of that crazy stuff people were talking about when you are in love.
Bringing the stars from the sky to them.
Tooru chuckled, holding on to Hajime's neck and shoulder, and couldn't be happier, having him so passionate, seeing him so in love. Smiling brightly, he responded to that kiss and let it last even longer than Hajime had planned.
"Take care, and...I let the diagnostics know that you’re in need of an X-ray" Hajime promised quietly, lifting him up again, "So stop by between eleven and five today."
Actually, Tooru hoped that Hajime would forget about his broken ribs, because he felt fine now, still a bit sore and stiff, but breathing didn't hurt that much. So maybe they weren't broken at all, but of course the forensic doctor wouldn't give him a simple "go" for that.
“Sure, I’ll be there, my beautiful star!” the detective said cheerfully, turning around to leave.
“I run after you with the machine, if you won't!” Hajime called after him, but had to shake his head in laughter and look after the detective with his so carefree steps for a moment, before he went in another direction.
Making his way to the hospital, he still had to do the autopsy under isolation conditions.
Arriving there within the next 30 minutes, he went right to Kuroo, greeting him and announcing that he wouldn't be in the morgue for the next hours.
“Hey Iwaizumi!” he was called back right when he wanted to leave, and so Hajime turned his head over his shoulder, “You...are in a good mood, eh?”
The chemist had noticed right. Hajime smirked.
“Maybe?”
“Had a good night?!” Kuroo joked.
“Maybe?” Hajime replied, as he was laughing with some blush on his face and then just walked off.
Well, he felt good! Really. Relaxed, full of energy, still a bit love drunk, but that was fine.
His mind automatically replayed the night of silent love and embracement. And then...the morning and the shower scene, full of lust and passion.
Everything that was connected to Tooru.
How could he not smile? How could he not feel happy?
He needed to focus again, as he threw the isolation clothes over. His mind switched fast into forensic mode again as he proceeded with the autopsy, examining the body from head to toe. Doing the analyis on his own too.
Sometimes, Hajime just liked to be alone, working in total silence, only his breathing to be heard. It was warm and sticky beneath the clothes, but he could bear with it.
And although he had been so high, he got serious again, as he couldn't let mistakes to take place.
If this really goes on...if he's back...then we have to expect the worst. The victim hasn't been poisoned by anything like the biochemicals we had analysed in the past. The letter though was a sign. He wants to show off. Again.
*
As Oikawa reached Makki’s building, he still couldn't stop smiling brightly, thinking about the time he spent with Hajime. So...amazing.
Like not the amazing everyone used to describe something cool or to show off. It was the kind of amazing that described how it feels to be in love. That sparkling amazing. And he was so amazing.
He was so in love with him, and nothing could change that.
“Oikawa...hey, man! What the hell happened to you?!” Makki said the moment the other walked in, noticing all of the wounds and bruises on his face. Although most of them were covered with bandaids, some of the swelling was still to be seen.
“The people you suggested me to talk with ruined my beautiful face and body like this” Tooru answered, but kept smiling.
He didn't even seem bothered to the slightest, and that was even more strange. So much, that Makki cocked an eyebrow as he just replied.
“Well, I warned you..." and held a suspicious expression himself, going on, “You...why are you smiling so much?”
“Can't I?”
“Sure you can, but I’ve never seen you smiling like that before” Makki shrugged, still curious.
And as Tooru was maybe a bit mean but not evil, he accepted that answer, especially the amusing facial expression he didn't see so often and decided to reveal his secret.
“Well, I might have spent a wonderful time with my boyfriend~”
“Aha!" Makki could already guess, what was all about, "Come on, tell me about it!”
“I won’t!” Tooru replied, sticking his tongue out like a sassy teenager.
“Uhhh tell me! Come on!" Makki started to nudge him in his side, "I know who it is anyway! So? I’m madly curious!”
“Get a boyfriend and then you’ll know!” Tooru smirked, half laughing now.
Makki made an offended sound, but he shrugged it off, looking at his friend again.
“So, talking about work...” he switched the topic now, “Mori wants to meet you.”
Oikawa snapped, giving him a deadly serious expression.
“What?! Why now? How?!”
That was damn sudden. Mori contacting Makki? Which meant, he was well aware that Makki was friends with him. And maybe he was even aware how Oikawa's inner circle was built. Hence, it could be...
“I can't tell you more. One of his buddies stopped by and asked me to give you this" Makki explained and handed him a card from the inside of his jacket pocket.
It was a clean white one, all written in a neat black inked handwriting.
Saturday, 2 pm, on the rooftop of Aoyama building.
Tooru stared down at the card, as if he could detect anything else. A hint, a hidden message. But of course, there wasn't any.
Just that statement. He had been invited to a private meeting with the most dangerous man in Japan.
“Don’t go, Oikawa. I know you probably won't listen to me, but hell...he’s a psychopath! If he wants to meet you...maybe you’re his target after all!” Makki objected, pretty concerned, looking at his friend, whose facial expression had changed from the shocked to a determined one.
The chocolate brown eyes searched the drug dealer's ones, and a little shiver ran down Makki's spine.
“Nothing will happen to me, you know I always have a plan” Tooru stated with a smirk.
His friend gave a long exhale. He wasn't happy with that answer.
He had known Oikawa Tooru for quite a while now.
It all started with a drug deal.
That day, Makki had gone himself, not being able to let his guys handle it. In the end, it was for the better, because Makki hadn't met up with a customer but with the detective here.
He had faked his request, and wanted to know if they could get into negoitations. Making another deal between them and only them.
Makki would serve information whenever Oikawa was in need of them. And Oikawa, on the other side, would make sure that if Makki or his friends got into a critical situation with the police, he would find them an escape route.
After that, he hadn't seen the detective for weeks. But suddenly, on one November night, he came back.
Oikawa's condition had been very bad: bruises, cuts, dirt on his clothes...he had been into a fight. And all he asked was: "Do you have something for me?"
Makki had understood in an instant. He was learning more and more about Oikawa Tooru, the great detective.
Maybe it was because the brunette had been a bit high from time to time. Maybe it was because he just needed to spill stuff out, not being able to hide all the pain and the wrecking thoughts on his mind.
But Makki got to know him much better over the time. That Oikawa was living alone, that he always put on an arrogant mask, that his deduction skills were far from brilliant and overwhelming. That he was quite similar to Sherlock Holmes, the fictional detective of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
And Makki also learnt, that Oikawa Tooru could take a lot. Of injuries, but also of drugs.
They became friends. Somehow, it was like that.
He had seen him at his worst, after that case with Mori four years ago.
He had seen him disappear and coming back again.
But he had never seen him being in love. Smiling sheepishly like any other man. Having that sparkle in the eyes you can only have when you have a crush.
And he clearly had never seen anyone by Oikawa's side before - Iwaizumi Hajime was the first.
So maybe it was only natural, that Oikawa wanted to deal with Mori himself. He didn't want to bring Iwaizumi into futher danger.
He wanted to put an end to this, and begin a new life. A life full of happiness, love...forgiveness.
Still, Makki's gut feeling told him that this wouldn't be turn out well. They shouldn't underestimate their enemy.
Makki looked after him, when his friend left with a waving of his hand, staying silent but thoughtful.
Another thing was, that Oikawa couldn't stagnate. He had to move. Move and move and move...never standing still.
The detective went to the police station now, so he could talk to Daichi about that case, what happened in the past, and how they might be able to link that to the present.
Of course, he had been aware that Makki was concerned and worried. He couldn't blame him for that.
But for Oikawa, it was much more important to close the case. He could live with being dragged into danger, but he couldn't live with the knowledge that Mori got to his goal, whether it was him or...someone else.
When he entered the building, going to the right floor, he was greeted warmly by everyone. They treated him as if he was still working with them.
Everyone had known Oikawa and respected him, as he was - after all - the best detective in Tokyo. Everyone, except one person...
“What the hell do you think you’re doing here?”
“Calm down, Miya. I only need to talk to Daichi” Tooru said dryly, with hands in his pockets, as he didn't want to put on another fight.
“You don’t need a fuck than getting out already. Or I’ll gladly kick your ass from here to the exit!" Atsumu objected with anger in his voice, walking towards him and blocked Oikawa's way to go any further.
“Oh, Oikawa!” the rescuer himself came along: Daichi greeted Tooru with a little smile, approaching them and making a little space between the two squabblers.
“Hey Daichi, you should keep Miya at bay better, you know?” Tooru commented, ignoring the other detective on purpose. But before Atsumu could take a step towards him, Daichi stopped him.
“Go back to work” Daichi ordered, looking at his kouhai in the eyes. He didn't want to have another fight there, even if it was Oikawa who was the provoking one now.
“But we don’t need him! Nobody needs his shit!” Atsumu yelled furiously.
“I said: Go. Back. To. Work.” Daichi repeated in a much stern tone, and Miya gave a huff, but still obeyed. He wasn't so stupid to talk back to his superior any futher. Not now.
Shooting an upset look at Oikawa, he turned around on his heels, leaving them.
Tooru sighed, giving space to the frustration, and put on a pouting face.
“You shouldn't provoke him that much" Daichi spoke up with a similar strict tone, "I know that you two don't get along, but don't make it worse, if you cross paths."
"He's the one welcoming me like this, every fucking time" Tooru murmured.
"Okay...what’s up?” Daichi switched the topic, and somehow he could already guess what it was.
“You know, why I’m here.”
Daichi lifted his eyebrows and then made a gesture to follow him to his office, so that they could speak in private.
“I know what are you thinking” the officer began, when the door was closed behind them.
“So you know why I must do this alone” Tooru continued the sentence, handing him the card that Makki had given him from Mori.
Daichi's eyes widened, and he looked up in shock.
“You...I won't allow-"
“You will. This is my case. My past. I need to finish this alone, as I should have done four years ago” the detective cut him off with a serious look in his face, as he wasn't joking at all.
“Oikawa...what if...what if you were his target after all this time? Even four years ago...?” Daichi asked him with a worried voice.
He had investigated in the past, had been the coordinative officer there and the first who had come to help, but it had been too late, as Nakamura had already been dead. He had witnessed the horror of the past's events. Witnessed Oikawa's state.
He was his colleague, but also a good friend. Sure, he did'not want to let him run into death.
“It doesn’t matter. I have to put an end on this. But I can’t do it if you or anyone else interfere. Mori is sly, intelligent, calculating. He wouldn't be so stupid to reveal himself if he wasn’t sure that he would be able to meet me alone. He surely has a plan if you guys come, you know that."
Of course, Daichi wouldn't be able to talk him out of it. There was just one last straw, although it wasn't so fair to play out that card.
“I know but...you shouldn't go, Oikawa. Just because you feel responsible for Heiji’s death-"
"I am responsible of his death, Daichi. I’m the one who dragged him to death. I’m the one who should finish this!” The words had left Tooru's mouth louder than originally planned. So much louder. He heard them echoing in the room.
Daichi crossed his arms in front of his chest, observing him for half a minute, but then exhaled with a long puff and lowered his arms again.
“I can’t change your mind, can I?" he murmured, "I want to see you again, so...please...just take care.”
“I’m hard to kill, remember?” Tooru smirked confidently, but he knew that Daichi was more than right about it.
*
Just right when the clock hit 3 pm, Hajime had most of his job done, and the analysis showed nothing extraordinary. Even the isolation conditions had been exaggerated. The victim wasn't infected with any chemical the letter included. Moreover, he hadn't found many clues. Better to say, almost no proofs: no DNA, therefore no fingerprints, no hair, no biting marks, no dandruff of the skin, clearly nothing.
That was exactly Mori's handwriting.
One could think that the victim just fell to the ground dead. Although it had been an injection with poison indeed, directly applied to the carotid artery.
So this was the only hint to be found. No hardcore drug, no knife, but the injection spot. But why the river?
Sighing, Hajime sat on the stool in his isolation jumper, swiveling from right to the left and looking at the body.
What was it, that Mori wanted to tell them?
He checked the last bullet points of the list, then finished his work and went to the cabinet for the decontamination process. Coming out, it was about half past four and he still had some time left for the documents, but decided to call Daichi first, not knowing that the latter had just ended his conversation with Oikawa.
"Hey...Iwaizumi here. I’ve...got a question" he greeted the officer on line, "Is there any hint we can connect with the murder location?" he asked, "I mean...past actions. From four years ago..."
Daichi went silent for a moment, clearly thinking and remembering the case's facts. The rustling of paper was to be heard. He was probably in his office, going through the notes, documents they already had collected and flipped through the pages quickly.
"Wouldn’t say so" he finally answered, which made Hajime hiss, "I mean...even if we follow the river‘s route: there isn’t a connection to the past murders."
"And...what about Nakamura?" Hajime asked with persistence, "I’m sorry if I sound indiscreet...but is there any chance he wants to give us some hints?! I’ve got the feeling the murderer wants to play with us..."
"Not only your feeling," Daichi agreed, "He is...with everyone, but especially with Oikawa."
"Could you...accompany me tomorrow?" the forensic doctor said then, "I’d like to see the former locations, I want to follow the river..."
There was another moment of silence and in the next, Hajime exhaled slowly.
“Iwaizumi-san, it’s not your job" Daichi wanted to end it, but got interrupted quickly.
“I know, but we won’t get anywhere from here” Hajime snarled, “The hints aren't enough. The body has nothing to do with the letter bomb next to it, and I don’t wanna have such a thing in my morgue again, my colleagues almost got killed.”
He wanted to have a quick end and Oikawa not too hard involved in that...the faster they would arrest Mori, the better.
If he had known that Oikawa had already contacted Daichi too, he might have decided otherwise. Daichi accepted and took an appointment with the forensic doctor, and then they ended the call.
Suddenly hearing someone clearing his throat from behind, Hajime twirled around, looking at Akaashi.
The forensic doctor went a little pale, but tried not to show it.
“Keiji, have you-"
“So, you’re unrolling that case again” his assistant simply stated, which let Hajime fall silent, “It’s the same like back then?!”
The forensic doctor tensed and sighed right after.
“Yeah, but listen...I don’t want anyone of you to get involved in this. Especially Akane.”
“Yui called me.”
He looked up, staring at Akaashi in the eyes, clearly shocked. She had called him? Why?
“She told me that you had contacted her and...she’s is seriously worried about you.”
“She shouldn’t be.”
“But she is! And I am, too!” Akaashi interrupted him, raising his voice, which was really rare.
Akaashi wasn't the kind of guy who got annoyed or lost his temper easily. But right now, Hajime noticed how hard his chest was raising and falling, how his hands were clenched into fists.
“Listen, if you want to track something with officer Sawamura okay, but don’t get too cocky! Your job is here and we need you. Don’t let Oikawa’s pace distract you!”
Hajime’s eyebrows knitted almost immediately at the mentioning of the detective's name.
“That’s not it” he talked back, but got the other up again.
“No, but you wouldn’t go for it like that, if he wasn’t involved. I really am happy for you two, really, but I don’t wanna see a colleague and friend of mine getting himself in danger, because he tries to save his boyfriend who's a little irresponsible and reckless.”
The two men stared at each other, and after quite a while, Akaashi lowered his gaze.
“I’m sorry. I don't wanna upset you and I shouldn’t have overheard your conversation. Nor should I tell you what to do. But...the events that happpened four years ago were a nightmare. Seeing Mori back isn’t something that calms down at all.”
Hajime put the hands in his pockets, looking aside after hearing him out.
“I know it, Keiji. I’m totally aware," he responded quietly, "And don’t think that it doesn’t bother me...finding such a letter again let my heartbeat go into tachycardia. I’m not cocky. I know my limits, still...I can’t wait until another victim books a stretcher in the morgue. And that's not only because it’s Tooru who’s involved and who's also maybe Mori's target. I don’t want to have that amount of bodies in my morgue ever again. And I don’t want you to be there again. So if I can do anything to prevent this...I will.”
Akaashi sighed. It was pointless to discuss. If Iwaizumi was determined to do something, he would aim for it, no matter what other people say. No matter how hard it would get. He was just like that.
“Just...make sure to come back in one piece and alive.”
“Don’t worry. The stretchers aren’t that comfortable and I don’t like the fridges either” Hajime joked, but promised afterwards that he would: be there, alive.
*
The day passed and it became evening. Hajime left work when it was about 6 PM, but not without asking the nurses in the diagnostic centre if Tooru had come by.
He hadn't.
His lips formed a thin line and now, the forensic doctor really was a bit angry at him. How could Tooru skip this?
If his lungs were damaged, the damage would be even worse, from day to day if he didn't treat it, right?
He tried to call him on his way home. Writing him a message. But no reply, no call back, no answer, left on unread.
Arriving at his apartment soon, Hajime took off his jacket, slipped off of his shoes and walked into the living room.
Looking around, yesterday evening seemed already so far away now...why the hell could that brat of a detective not give him at least a little sign, that everything was okay?
It was to be said, that Hajime could not sleep very well. His body was exhausted because of the autopsy in the unlikeable isolation clothes, but his mind didn't want to rest at all...still worried about Tooru. Still worried about everything that could happen. He wasn't someone to be preoccupied that much over things he could only imagine. He was a man of science after all.
However, being so attached to the detective made him feel sick, not knowing anything now.
Getting up the next morning, he prepared himself to get to the police department. His appointment with Daichi was at mid-morning and so he got there, when the clock hit ten, having a coffee cup in his hand, sipping from it while looking around in the entrance hall.
He had visited Daichi only twice or thrice, so Hajime wasn't so familiar with the surroundings. Looking at the direction signs on a board on the wall, he followed the clean way straight ahead, then turned left, after he had received his visitor pass.
Walking to the staircase, going upstairs to the right floor, he dared another look at his phone. Still no message from Tooru. Now even left on read.
Tooru, at least say, you're ok. - he wrote again, then turned right at the end of the staircase and went to the end of the corridor.
Arriving at another office door, he knocked and stepped in after the permission to do so.
"Excuse me...I'm looking for officer Sawamura?" he asked, looking into some curious faces and then...into one familiar face, which made Hajime's eyes go wide and his heart sink.
“Iwaizumi-kun?” Atsumu said in surprise, standing up from his desk.
The detective clearly hadn't expected to see him that soon. Not after...what had happened at the hospital. He felt sorry for punching him and for losing his nerves in front of the man he liked. He approached the other slowly.
“I’ll walk you to his office” Atsumu offered and passed him without another word, so Hajime followed.
Sure, Atsumu didn't want to talk to him while they were surrounded by colleagues. Maybe they were police officers, but this didn't mean they wouldn't spread rumours. It was something nobody of them were in need right now. Being on the corridor with him, alone, Atsumu took his courage to talk to him in a little small-talk manner. It was hard.
“How...have you been?”
Hajime looked at Atsumu in the eyes, who shot him a glance over his shoulder, and he felt his body getting stiff. Not out of angst, but he clearly felt a bit uncomfortable after what had happened.
Moreover, he had had a brief moment of catching a side of the detective nobody else had. That side of him, which was really likeable during their dinner and date...which had made him want to kiss him.
Breathing with a long inhale, Hajime only nodded. Was it okay to talk to him like that after he had dumped him?
"Okay" It was one word, that left his lips almost inaudible.
Fortunately his own bruise healed fast. He watched Atsumu's back, and then stopped for a moment.
"I'm sorry" Hajime blurted suddenly, but he couldn't keep it to himself like that, "I'm sorry for...being such an asshole."
Better to say, getting together with Tooru so fast.
At least that was how it must have looked like, right...?
"And...I'm sorry...for your loss" Hajime spoke even quieter, "I don't think the provocation T...Oikawa set was okay. And I get it...that you can't be fond of him. Therefore..."
“You don’t need to apologise, Iwaizumi-kun," Atsumu broke in, "I’m the one who should do that, because I lost my mind and...” Atsumu sighed, then shrugged.
“I don’t regret saying those things to that bastard, though. He is responsible of Heiji’s death. He could have chosen not to drag him along. And I’ll do anything to give Heiji a bit of justice.”
Then he paused for a moment, clicking his tongue. There he was again, letting out his anger which had festered over such a long time now. It wasn't something he should do in front of Hajime.
“You can’t choose who to be in love with. You fell for that...asshole, and I...I fell for you, Iwaizumi-kun” Atsumu went on, standing in front of Sawamura Daichi's office now.
“I don’t want us to distance from each other. I want at least to be your friend, if you’ll let me...” facing him now, Atsumu smiled wryly, “But, if one day...you change your mind about that jerk...I’ll be here, waiting for you.”
Listening to him, to his calm voice now, although it was clearly a little trembling Hajime couldn't blame him for. He saw that side of Atsumu that had caught his interest. Next to the outgoing one. He could be really sincere, really caring and honest about his feelings.
"I won't demand anything like that. What you've been through or...maybe still going through, I won't judge" the forensic doctor cracked a smile.
"I also don't want to put much distance between us and...I pretty suck at such uncomfortable silence, anyway. I mean, I'm used to silence, working in a morgue. But no, I don't talk with the dead, don't worry" he even managed to joke.
"So...I'd like to be friends with you. Really. And...I'd rather have my own opinion about what's between you and him. I won't hold back if I notice that one of you is unreasonable. Goes for both of you." Hajime inhaled, lowering his gaze, "Thank you...Atsumu-san."
“Well then...Sawamura’s office is here” Miya pointed at the door, trying to make that a little turn-around, “It was nice to see you again, Iwaizumi-kun. I’m happy we...got it sorted out.”
"Yeah...me too" Hajime nodded, "Thank you...well...for making the first step."
As they parted, Hajime collected himself, straightening his shoulders and knocked on the door twice. Getting the invitation right after, he went inside, seeing Daichi sitting at his desk over some documents.
"Daichi-san...good morning" he greeted him with a polite smile, "Thank you for accepting my request. I know it must be inconvenient for you as...you already hang over a bunch of work? I'll make sure you got some redemption for that" he observed and blinked.
“Don’t worry about it" Daichi shook his head and stood up, "I’d prefer asking you to stay out all of this but...”
The way he left the sentence unfinished was somehow off, and made Hajime knitting his eyebrows.
"Well...everyone wants me to stay out. No surprise, because of what happened back then."
Facing Daichi, his own expression became more serious, "What's wrong? And don't say nothing. You're not blinking. When you're not blinking, something worries you."
The officer was a bit surprised, but then gave a little sigh.
“It's nothing, really. Just...tough days" he didn't want to talk about it at all, "So tell me, what it was that you wanted to let me accompany you to the river? I was actually a little bit surprised."
"Well, I’d like to go to the place where we’ve found the second victim because...I wonder if there's any connection to the river itself" Hajime let his own cross examination go, as he wouldn't get out something from Daichi at all, "So...you know...I ask myself, if Mori wants to show us something. Something important connected to the last cases.”
“Well, maybe your intuition is right," Daichi nodded slowly, "The first victim had water in her lungs, right? From that river? Seems to me like no coincidence at all."
“Right, and eh...I know that you were in charge of the investigations back then...maybe you can tell me some more details" the forensic doctor added after a little exhale, "I had to look through the archive files because of the autopsy. And...when we had had the letter bomb incident, it was Nakamura-san who had directed it to our department. One of my colleagues told him so. If there's anything case related that Mori would use as a direct invitation to send us to hell...”
A wry, bitter smile appeared on Hajime's face, “I’m asking myself if we were the target or if he wanted to aim for someone else...”
Hestitating first, Daichi crossed his arms in front of his chest.
“Actually, Oikawa was the one in charge of the investigations" he corrected, "But obviously I knew all about that case, of course..."
Chewing on his inner cheek for a second, almost insecure whether to speak his thoughts or not, Daichi went on.
"I don’t know, I've got the feeling that Mori is aiming for Oikawa. Back then, Oikawa stopped most of his plans, so it’s obvious he's his enemy. But still, I don't get why he's back now, after all these years? If he had wanted Oikawa dead, I'm sure he could have done it.”
Hajime felt a shiver down his spine by that thought. He crossed his arms, lowering his gaze, but still had to agree.
"Dragging down his enemy? That’s strange. Also leaving his hints like that, as if he wanted us to find him. Furthermore, we still don’t know why the victim was poisoned...and declared dead four years ago."
Too many questions, too less answers.
"Let’s see if we can find anything."
He turned around, already ready to leave, and Daichi also took his jacket from the wardrobe hooked on the wall. Just when he had put it on, the forensic doctor gave a little "Oh", so the other's eyebrows lifted with a questioned look.
"Don’t...tell him, okay? If he ever asks you, don't tell him” Hajime requested seriously, “I’m not going to investigate any further, but the traces are too spread and I can't work with the evidences alone."
He didn't want to let Tooru know that he was doing that on his own.
Pursing his lips together, Daichi inhaled sharply and they made their way out of the police department.
"I won’t. But you shouldn’t hide this from him...he’ll know, anyway."
"No...but I only let him know if it’s necessary. He wants to keep me out of it and I understand this, but I also have to take care of my colleagues. They had suffered once, Yui still has a trauma, and I won't let them experience it twice. That’s at least what I can do.”
Staying silent now, they took the police car to get to the river. It was about fifteen minutes until they arrived, and they didn't talk at all. Daichi stopped the car on the little parking lot, which would lead to the offical walking routes there, and they got off.
Walking down the beaten path, pushing aside bushes or little branches on eye level, they reached the shore and Hajime let his eyes wander.
"The victim was found here...considering the autopsy, it seems she was thrown into the water...at least five hundred meters from here? Let’s get up to the river stream" Hajime suggested, more mumbling to himself, already heading off.
Daichi took quick steps to follow him, watching the river, but then observed the back of the shorter male in front of him.
Yeah...quite the same.
"You’re...just like him" the police officer stated suddenly, catching up to his side now.
Hajime stared at him in confusion and received an explaining smile from the other.
"Heiji" he said, "You remind me of him, but...you’re somehow way crazier” Daichi paused, thinking about his colleague for a few seconds,
“He was always cheery and responsible. But if it was about Oikawa, he almost became unreasonable. The difference between you two is that he was still very cautious, and you aren’t."
That hurt. It was like a punch in the face, which let Hajime frown.
"You completely lose your mind when it's about him" Daichi said.
It wasn't about scolding his colleague, but as Daichi noticed how he tried to turn things upside-down, doing everything to make progress, he needed to show him that. That if it had been someone else, he wouldn't even have agreed to accompany him there.
The forensic doctor had swallowed, listening to those words, and his expression had become dead-serious now. Other thoughts crossed his mind.
He hadn't seen Daichi like that before: so thoughtful, almost reminiscent. He had never given a thought of the impact that Nakamura's death had had on his colleagues. It must have been hard for all of them.
When Yui had been the victim of that damn letter bomb, Hajime hadn't hesitated a minute to help her with his blood, with everything he could do. Because...spending so much time together...it was more than just being colleagues.
Something...like family. Not with everyone, but a few people would become really dear to you. That must have happened to Daichi and the others too, right?
"That's not on purpose" Hajime replied quietly. Being reckless. Like being awaken from a state of sleep.
“It really isn’t, but...we...have both been through hell. Tooru still is. And I don’t want him to do this alone. I don’t want him to break. He blames himself too much. I mean, I’m not in the place to judge, but from all the little I know about Nakamura-san...I don’t think he would like to see him suffer like that, and moreover he’s...I can’t lose him. I just can’t."
The words just slipped Hajime's tongue and a wry smile appeared on his face too.
"He’s the first one I really feel comfortable with. It feels like home. You know, the sort of feeling that makes you feel at ease and...sorry, I'm talking nonsense!” Hajime cut himself off, slightly embarrassed with red cheeks, clearing his throat.
Daichi chuckled quietly, then shook his head in understanding.
"You’re just speaking your mind, and that’s fine, don’t apologise for nothing" the police officer reassured him, while they were walking next to the water, getting to their destination, "And you're right. If Heiji was still alive, he would've scolded Tooru for sure. No one blames him, but I guess it can’t be helped. If I was in Oikawa’s shoes, I would have blamed myself too. He just feels guilty that he was the one who dragged Heiji into this. Although it was his own decision, Oikawa came up with it. But...Tooru must overcome this.” Daichi added, really concerned about his friend,
"And I’m glad he found you, Iwaizumi-san. You know, after that case, Tooru just disappeared. He was kicked out of our department. I was scared that he felt so devastated that he might have killed himself. His mind is somehow...really destrusive."
Yeah...that's true. It wasn't that Hajime would call Tooru a psycho or anything, but his boyfriend had clearly endured too much, had been through a lot and so many insecurities...and he knew too well himself, how hard it was to go on after a loss. You blame yourself for...
"But then, after a year, he came back. Although, the darkness of the past reigned in his eyes. He told me that he had something to do: find Mori and take revenge for Heiji. Once he would have done so...he wouldn’t mind dying” Daichi continued, pretty serious.
And that was also something Hajime understood. Imagining a world without that nagging, sometimes too cocky, too flirty but also so handsome and sensitive, so loving detective he had met and fallen in love with...it was unbeareable.
The police officer looked at him for a moment and then the tone of his voice got a little more relieved.
"But I think you gave him a reason to live again."
"I'll try my best that he...will never lose his will of living again," Hajime vowed quietly and looked at the other with sincere eyes, "When this is over...I want to show him more. More besides murder, drug cases or whatver other criminal minds come up to. More of...the world we have."
His eyes narrowed and he looked aside, swallowing down a lump in his throat.
"I won't let Mori take away what we have," he whispered, moving forward.
It was a promise. For him. For Tooru.
From the path they walked down, they were led so some building complexes in the background, reaching them within a few minutes. It was an unofficial walk-through they had crossed.
Looking up to the grey houses, Hajime hissed.
"What...is this all up to? Has he or his buddies thrown the body from here into the water, or what?”
Looking carefully around the shore, Daichi’s smile also dropped and his eyes got suddenly wide.
"What is it?" the other wanted to know, all perplexed why the officer went to pale.
"This...” Daichi started, looking at the second building from the left, following its height and swallowed, "This is the building where...Heiji died."
Hajime blinked in disbelief.
"No way? That’s..."
No coincidence.
His feeling told him. That merely was a coincidence. It was planned, Mori had planned it, that they would understand. They got the clue.
"If this is true...then...what the hell is he up to?!" Hajime snarled, "Isn’t it enough that he already killed Nakamura? Why is he...?!" he stopped.
He had just looked around, not focusing on anything in particular, but there it was...
Bending down, he had found a hair accessory he knew too well. A second hairslide in the same golden colour and with the same floral ornament.
"Our victim wore the other one in her hair," he declared, looking up to Daichi, "So the trail led us here..."
"Maybe this is a warning for us. To not interfere with his work. Or...he wants to show Oikawa. I don't know, maybe..." Daichi stammered shocked, as all the memories from the past came back to him with a sudden blow now.
"...making him suffer," Hajime added, standing up, his attention was drawn to the police officer who was totally all at sea by now, "Are... you okay?" he asked him quietly.
Exhaling, Hajime got a bitter taste on his tongue. If it was that crucial, Tooru surely would throw himself into this case with all he had...Hajime wouldn't like him to do so.
"Daichi-san...can you...I know that’s a lot to ask for, but maybe...can you tell me more? What had exactly happened?"
They had the whole way back and with that little proof in his hand, they had to go back nonetheless to examine a new evidence. Analysing it. Maybe finding other traces, DNA, whatever.
And he wanted to understand, to really understand what they had to expect. Afterwards, he needed to find Tooru...
Not knowing anything of Hajime's plan in his mind, Daichi inhaled deeply, before recollecting all his memories. Recollecting himself. And finally he took his courage to talk to Hajime.
For the first time in a while, he had to reconsider everything and although the officer had always thought of himself, gotten over it, the sudden stabbing pain in his chest, how it clenched his whole body together, was a clear sign that he still wasn't over or better to say: he was, but it still hurt a lot.
"It all began with some murders. Nothing...special. The victims weren't conneceted to each other, but the way they were murdered was the same. That was the link. Mori played with us. With each body, he mocked us more. Tooru was losing his mind. I think you already noticed, that he can’t stand people messing with him."
Hajime nodded lightly.
"But Mori...was more than that. He enjoyed it, having a challenger. And Tooru got high from that, euphoric. He wanted to put it to a quick end, but the way Mori was interacting was thrilling. He had never come across such a mastermind," Daichi went on with a wry smile, "Heiji couldn’t bear with it. I think that was the reason, why Heiji started to investigate on his own. He exchanged ideas with Tooru, but then...everything got more serious. You know, when the bodies appeared each day?"
Of course he did. Hajime would never forget how he almost hadn't enough space in the morgue for them. So many innocent people, losing their life.
"Tooru hadn't want to partner up with him in the first place. But this was just the coordination and after they got to know each other better...Heiji chose to be with him. Not only at work, I mean. I think he never made it clear towards Tooru, but..." sighing, the police officer felt a cool chill and shivered for a moment.
"They went together to that building here. Trying to arrest that bastard as we found his hiding place. Things got wrong. We had it under control, but they did it on their own, without us, knowing. Heiji died because of a gunshot that hit his heart. Actually, even if Mori’s target was Oikawa, he simply killed Heiji to destroy Tooru much more than just actually kill him. He's a psychopath and a sadist. He enjoys the pain of other's suffering and is fascinated by that. And I fear that..it's happening again. That’s also why I told you not to get involved” Daichi stopped, looking Hajime into his eyes, truly worried.
"You’re a good man, Iwaizumi-san, and a great forensic doctor, so please...leave this to us."
Maybe that was quite alike...Heiji who investigated on his own.
And now...he was too.
Hajime tried to digest the information he had received, taking one or two minutes for himself.
Everything made sense now. Tooru's enthusiasm, Daichi's concern. And even...
"Which means, the package we had received hadn’t been sent to us on purporse," he mumbled, "I’d rather say...because Nakamura was in charge..."
And therefore, another thought crossed his mind and let him feel sick: what if it was also planned, that he tracked Mori? That is was planned, that he found the first victim with water in her lungs, so he would link the appearance of the second body with the river directly. The river which led to the building...
"That’s terribly insane" Hajime looked up, "I see your point, but I can’t let Tooru do this alone! It was hard enough to get him back on track when he noticed that this is about Mori. He tried to get some information and was beaten up terribly - and is already at work again, without even having a check-up of his clearly cracked ribs. So I won’t let him do this on his own! I won’t let my partner die."
And this was what he was really afraid of. Daichi nodded slowly, as he knew too well what Oikawa was capable of when it came to difficult cases, especially Mori.
"I’m sure Tooru wants the same thing" his voice still cracked, as they walked back, now.
Yeah, Oikawa Tooru would have rather died happily for his Iwaizumi Hajime.
"Thank you again for accompanying me" Hajime then announced and bit his bottom lip, "I have one question left...by any chance...do you know his address? Tooru's, I mean."
That was quite embarrassing again and had nothing to do with their work, but...
"It’s just...I won’t get him on phone and if I don’t find him within the next 24 hours, his head skull will decorate my desk next" he made some grimaces.
Daichi gripped his shoulder friendly, and smiled at him.
"It wasn’t a bother to me at all. Actually now we understood where Mori is aiming at."
He then wrote down Oikawa's address on a sheet of his little memo pad and handed it to Hajime. The forensic doctor cracked a little smile.
Sawamura Daichi was more than just a good cop. More than just a good team leader. He was also a really good friend.
"Thank you," Hajime mentioned sincerly.
Not only for the address, but for what he had told him and that he had come with him, although his own schedule was propably pretty busy.
"And...I’m still up for lunch or an after work beer, next time?"
"Sure, we’ll have fun together!" Daichi laughed a bit and then they reached the car, parting their ways.
Daichi, heading back to the police department, Hajime going directly to that address.
Using his phone, he looked it up and got the direction quickly.
Dear Tooru, be prepared for some special visit!
Walking down the road alongside the river, he got back to the mainstreets, and after a short ride with the train, he got to his destination.
Tooru was living in a calm area. It wasn't the most luxurious one, but at least it wasn't like the area he had visited with him to meet up with that Makki guy.
The apartment building was not so high - four floors only - and it seemed a little older than his own. The beige-coloured walls had grey shadows of dirt cover on it, the door bell nameplate was scratched. He searched for Tooru's name and yes...there it was.
Hajime ringed, but of course nobody was there. Fortunately, someone came out of the house and the forensic doctor took the chance to sneak in. He didn't know which floor he had to go to, so he just gave a try. And after he had checked the first floor without success, he found his apartment number in the second floor.
So he pressed the button again, but still no answer. Grumbling, Hajime’s eyes narrowed...where the hell was this idiot?!
He looked at the door knob. It would be actually pretty stupid, but...
Of course not. Why should it be...
Open.
Hajime blinked in disbelief. No way...the door screeched a bit, as he slid it open.
Silence.
Tooru wasn't at home but...
HE LET IT UNLOCKED?!
Shocking news: Japan's best detective...DIDN'T LOCK THE DOOR!!!
“What a naive idiot!” Hajime murmured, then stepped in anyway.
He slowly made his way through the small, dark corridor, taking off his shoes first.
Of course he was curious, and of course he felt like an intruder, but...somehow his heart also beated faster.
It was Tooru's home...
His mind started to memorize all the little things around there.
Some keys on the good used, wooden drawer. The small, round lamp on that. The way to the kitchen on his right, a small dark red coloured rug on the laminate of the floor. The walls undecorated.
He got to the living room and...second shock.
JAPAN'S BEST DETECTIVE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO TIDY UP!!!
And Hajime had also another feeling in his gut. If Tooru didn't lock up...maybe...
He went to the kitchen he had already detected, went to the refrigerator, opened it and...
"Oh Tooru...."
His voice sounded like the one of a mom who was somehow disappointed. This explained his outside meals. Definitely.
It wasn't that the apartment was dirty or anything. Maybe a bit chaotic, but Hajime would rather say that someone actually was living here. Not like his own, where everything was neat like a model apartment to rent.
And although there was this chaos, and there was nothing in the fridge, and the fact that he didn't lock up...
When Hajime sat down on the couch, letting his eyes wander through the room, a smile showed up.
This...was the place where Tooru lived. This was his private life.
And Hajime didn't need to sniffle around. He somehow felt comfortable, as Tooru’s comforting scent was lingering there...ah stop!
He wanted to be angry!!
Be angry!!!
...
At least when Tooru would return home.
*
And Oikawa was heading home after he had a tough day full of researches. Going to one place, going to another.
Asking this, asking that. Waiting, talking, waiting, moving, talking, waiting...
He was so tired that he just wanted to jump on his bed and sleep. A rare wish of his, as he usally had proper insomnia problems, but when he entered his apartment, he blinked in surprise, noticing a pair of shoes that weren't his.
“What the...” he commented, too tired to put on a suspicious expression and walked slowly through the corridor, heading to the living room, where some light filled the darkeness.
His heart skipped a beat, when he saw his boyfriend sitting on the couch.
“What...what are you doing here?!” Tooru panicked, and the forensic doctor looked at him, straightening up now and having a stern look on his face, crossing arms in front of his chest.
"Hello beautiful, welcome home after not-picking-up-the-phone and forgetting-the-checkup-in-case-your-lungs-get-stabbed-by-broken-ribs!" Hajime said, putting on a little fake smile.
"I just thought to visit you. In case I won't see you the next days, because your nose is stuck in your researches."
Ouch. Cynism.
He stood up now and walked slowly towards the other until he stopped right in front of Tooru and cupped his cheeks with a little spank sound, "We definitely have to talk about your eating habits and the empty fridge, maybe about your mess here, but most of all...lock-the-fucking-door."
Looking at his boyfriend in the eyes, Hajime's expression softened.
"I'm glad you're okay..." he murmured now, and leaned in to kiss the detective on his lips for just a few seconds.
A proper welcome home treat. Oikawa blinked at him, still surprised and quietly shocked.
“O-Okay, but...eh...how did you know I'm living here? And...and it’s not true!!" Tooru blurted, trying to justify his actions now with an exaggerated smile on his lips, too.
Which was...somehow funny, as Hajime squeezed his cheeks a bit there, because he wasn't to be convinced otherwise.
"I just don’t check my phone when I’m working! And...I would have called you tomorrow, when I had gotten some sleep.”
"Tomorrow is a bit late," Hajime talked back, sighing silently, "It's not about checking on you. I'm just worried as...you're my boyfriend. And you get into dangerous situations. I just want to know that you're okay."
Tooru pursed his lips. Yeah, that was something he wasn't familiar with. So he looked aside, shooting a quick gaze around and feeling actually a bit guilty that Hajime had to see that mess for the first time he was visiting him.
He didn't mind others' opinion on him, but Hajime’s...Hajime was everything.
Maybe he had imagined Tooru living in a perfect house. Where everything was tidied up, where every single thing had its own place, where the fridge was always full, the door was closed, and the kitchen smelt good because someone was cooking.
All those things Oikawa couldn't provide.
"I don’t have time to tidy up," he started quietly after a long pause.
"Okay."
Tooru's eyebrows lifted on that single-word comment.
"And I don’t lock the door because sometimes I forget the keys or lose them somewhere, so I just leave it open. No one is going to visit me anyways, so it’s no problem!" Tooru shrugged.
"Okay. But I'm gonna visit you. And even if I'm not here, it's safer to lock the door, you know that. Curious neighbours and all."
Yeah...maybe he was right.
"And as for the fridge...I don’t know how to cook, so it’s pointless buying something that I can’t cook anyway!" the detective said, trying to get a point int the argument.
"Okay."
"And I'm not good at taking calls and focus on others as I don't know what it is to care for people like that!" Tooru got even a little upset now, as he didn't understand Hajime's calmness.
Why he was even smiling now, despite his anger.
And so he was pulled closer to the forensic doctor, arms wrapped around Tooru's waist.
"It's okay. I accept this. I accept you," Hajime explained, while his fingertips were gently stroking the other's cheek.
"I'll make sure to cook for you when I’m here. I don't care if it's messy or your fridge is unfilled. That's nothing which can't be improved. But it’s you whose presence I feel here. The comfortable, warm one, you know” he whispered, and made Tooru's face lit up, little by little.
"I...can’t express...how much I love you..." the detective only managed to say, holding on to him and burying his face in Hajime’s neck.
“Hey...you already do it so well" the forensic doctor chuckled, stroking his hair and inhaled that special scent he loved so much, "Still we have to talk about your ribs...still hurting? Your swollen eye looks already a bit better."
“A bit, but only when I bend down” Tooru replied quietly.
"Then take care. I can't force you to go, but I'd rather see your xray here..." Hajime insisted, then exhaled and let the topic drop, "Okay...how about this: I’ll manage something to eat and in the meantime...just relax a bit. You look tired, love..."
Usually, Hajime wasn't into pet names. Not for himself, not for others, but Tooru made him.
He had only to look at him, and there were so many things he actually wanted to tell him. Descriptions, sweet names, all time confessions of how much he loved him. Shit...he was head over heels for him.
So damn in love that it was ridiculous.
"You really...have time for that?" Tooru cocked an eyebrow, "If you’re busy, it’s just fine, really. I was planning to sleep without eating anyway” Tooru smiled, rubbing his eyes and had to suppress a little yawn.
“Yeah yeah, you can nap while I’m cooking and yes, I have time. I take that time!" Hajime scruffed his nose a bit, then shoved him to the couch, "I’ll be back in fifteen minutes. Give me thirty more to prepare our dinner. And you: relax!”
He emphasised the last word and kissed Tooru gently, before he was about to leave. Tooru just hummed a little, when Hajime kissed him, and he was already missing those lips the moment after, even if he had tasted them in the morning too.
But when he laid down on the couch, making himself comfortable, smiling to himself because Hajime was there with him...
Why is Hajime so perfect and nice to me?
*
The forensic doctor made it in twenty minutes to the supermarket, coming back with a full back of groceries.
Actually, it was more than he needed for one dinner, but as he knew exactly how Tooru was living, he just wanted to fill the fridge a bit more. He took off his shoes quietly, not sure if Tooru was asleep. He really would needed this.
Hajime went straight to the kitchen with the grocery bags under his arms. He didn't hear a single sound. He put everything on the working space and went to the living room.
Hajime's eyes widened a bit, his lips curled up to a genuine smile. Tooru was sleeping with a cute expression on the couch, totally drifted off. How beautiful he was...
Coming closer, Hajime couldn't resist to take a picture with his phone, before he bent himself over the other male and gave him a soft kiss on the forehead.
"I love you, Tooru..."
Lifting himself up again, he sent the photo to the sleephead, and went back to the kitchen, preparing dinner now.
A delicious smell was brought with him, when he finally took the filled plates to the table.
"Time to wake up, Tooru~"
The feeling of soft lips on his cheek...
“Mhm...” Tooru murmured, opening his eyes only a little, "I want to sleep, Hajimeee~" he whined, as he had clearly forgotten that it wasn't even night. So closing his eyes again...it took quite some time, until he noticed the delicious smell filling his nostrils...that was unfair...sleepy, but getting appetite now.
"You can fall to sleep afterwards again, but for now fill your tummy with something good, okay?“ Hajime chuckeld, stroking his cheek and hair, while he sat down next to him.
It didn't help, so he kissed him again. Nope. And then...started to tickle Tooru around his waist with two fingers.
"Haji-chan...it isn’t fair...!” Tooru cried out of laughter, and took all his strength to escape and cupping Hajime's cheeks, pushing him back into the back rest of the couch, “You will regret this soon, you Demonizumi!” he smirked, the typical flirty one which made Hajime's heart skip a beat.
Tooru stood up, leaving Hajime flustered like that, to go to the table. Suddenly stopping.
“Ah, no! Actually...Iwazilla!” he announced, and stuck out his tongue.
Hajime blinked. Another stupid nickname. And...then his lips...cracked a smile. A wide one. Bright.
"That’s actually cool!" Hajime stated, "I should use this for my Instagram profile!"
Laughing Hajime followed him to the dining table.
"Take your seat."
“You should be irritated, you know?” Tooru pouted disappointed, and did as he was told.
Hajime grinned and poured some of the soup in a smaller bowl as a first dish to warm up. They had also some fried slices of fish with blanched vegetables in some vinaigrette.
“You have to tell me someday, what you dislike...I don’t wanna drop a clanger here."
“I love everything my dear Iwa-chan cooks!” Tooru took the spoon in his hand, as Hajime sat down too, and they started to eat, “But, just so you know...I absolutely hate fennel. I don’t even understand why fennel exists! Ugh, it’s disgusting!!” he said, making a grimace when he was just thinking of that vegetable.
"Fortunately I’m not a fan of that fennel stuff either."
"But why aren't you upset about that nickname!" he blurted, his mind still occupied with that, and he looked up.
“Sorry, but the combination of my name and Godzilla was too obvious! I can only like it, right?” Hajime grinned too proudly, and glanced at Tooru with some hidden excitement in his eyes.
“Does it sound weird if I say...that I really love watching you eat?!” Hajime added after some seconds of observing, but then looked down to his own plate, “Seeing you so happy and satisfied...that really brings me joy too. “
“I know, I’m too beautiful, Haji” Tooru joked with a wink, but then he smiled softly, "Me too...I love eating with you...just having you by my side” he admitted finally with a bit pinkish tint on his cheeks.
“You are” Hajime simply stated, not ashamed to show his feelings there, but had blushed as he heard Tooru’s words.
That was also a first for him to have someone saying that he loved to have him as company just like this. Some kind of intimacy beyond friendship. Looking Tooru into his chocolate brown eyes, Hajime felt the happiness inside him dwelling.
“So...I guess we have to make this a habit then?” continuing eating, he thought through it, “I mean...the local supermarket here is really good! They have a lot of stuff I haven’t seen in the one in my area and everything. So...if I stay over, I’ll make sure to make some great breakfast every time!”
“I’d love it, Iwazilla-chan!” Tooru exclaimed with the same amount of happiness, “And of course you can stay for the night, if you want” he added, glancing away as something plopped up his mind.
I have to ask Kuroo for some help for tomorrow...
Maybe he could surprise Hajime. As a thank you. To show him his gratitude but most of all...his love.
Inviting him over, having dinner together - but this time, Tooru would be cooking, and therefore he needed Kuroo's help. And he needed to tidy up the whole apartment, and...yeah, a busy day, but it would be worth it.
“O-oh...then...eh...” Hajimes blushed a little bit more, because of the excitement in Tooru's voice and his offer to have a sleepover there. And he couldn't help it, but smile sheepishly all along.
“Sure...would be great” Hajime replied properly and reached with his hand for Tooru’s across the table, caressing it before lifting it to the level of his lips, kissing the back softly.
"There’s nothing...I’d love more"
After finishing their dinner in comfortable silence or having little chat, he stood up to take care of the dishes.
“Don’t fall asleep in the bathroom,” he teased, because the tiredness still lingered on Tooru’s face.
For a second he pondered, when brought up a question he still wanted to know. Although he knew that Tooru wouldn't tell him everything. Maybe that was even for the better, as he would have to do so too.
"How did it go for you today?"
"Well...actually I think we're right, that he hit on another target. Despite his victims," Tooru answered after a little silence and glanced over to Hajime, "But I don’t know who it is yet."
It was a lie. He already knew too well. Him. But this was nothing to be spoken and so he threw the question back.
"And you? I can tell by the seam of your pants that you've been somewhere else than the hospital. Maybe...the riverside?" Tooru deducted.
He was Japan’s most skilled detective after all. It was easy to come to that conclusion and although Hajime's eyes narrowed a bit, a slight smirk appeared on his lips. Of course, Tooru could tell.
"It'll be hard to get you a Christmas present without you knowing about it before,” he joked but then went for the truth, "Yes, I've been there. It still felt weird to me that our second victim seemed to be thrown in the water, and I wanted to make sure that we didn't miss a thing there."
Well, he said nothing but the truth there.
"We haven’t: I can’t locate the origin, but the body was thrown in on purpose after the murder. Not to disappear, but to be found. By us."
Tooru nooded and tried to catch up with the information, but somehow...he just couldn't. Usually, he could cover up his tiredness, but right now it was impossible. He felt too comfortable, had eaten some pretty good dinner and was in company with his beloved Iwa-chan.
So maybe it was just natural, that his body tried to conquer his stubbornness.
He was even about falling asleep on the table, when Hajime smirked and came back.
“Come on...I bring you to bed” the latter whispered, and he helped him standing up.
Shoving his arms around his waist and having all his weight against his own, they walked to the bedroom.
Tooru almost fell on the soft mattress, eyes half-closed.
"Shall I help you with changing or can you do it on your own?” Hajime asked his sleepy boyfriend.
“Mmm...” Oikawa managed to say, which was neither a yes nor a no, but humming like that only made him much cuter, “I can do it alone, you don’t have to...worry...” Tooru yawned, stood up and searched for some clothes in the wardrobe.
“Are you fine with these? I know they won’t fit you well because you are shorter than me...” Tooru teased with a light chuckle, throwing a shirt and sweatpants at him.
Frowning, Hajime caught it and lifted his eyebrows.
“Don’t make it sound as if I’m 20 centimetres shorter!” he grimaced, but that wasn't the problem. The shirt itself was a bit irritating. Not surprising but...irritating.
Aliens.
Colourful little, comic-like aliens. And the slogan 'We'll find you'.
“If you wanna see me in tight shirts, you can just say so” Hajime couldn't help but smirk and stepped to Tooru, kissing his temple gently.
“I’d rather see you shirtless, Iwa-chan. That’s a more amazing view for me, you know?” Tooru replied in the same challenging tone.
Would he made Hajime blush at least once tonight? Well, if he still had the ambition to flirt, he would've been much more successful. But it was the highest level Tooru could afford now.
Wearing his pyjamas already - alien pattern, he crawled back into bed.
“Don’t you wanna join me?” Tooru pouted, looking at Hajime like a five-year-old, as it took too much time for his liking, until the other finally changed.
Hajime stared at the other for a moment, really blushing now and swallowed, but then started to unbuckle his belt, getting off his jeans, after he had regained his composure.
Wanna play with fire? Okay!
And although he still felt a bit embarrassed, his pride couldn't be stopped. His olive-green eyes searched for Tooru's, as he let the heavy fabric fell down to his ankles.
The pouting detective tried his best not to gaze too much at Hajime's perfect hips, his well-formed thighs, the great shaped calves and back to his butt, fitting nicely in his boxers. And with the alien pyjamas, it was even more shown off. Damn.
“Of course, I'll join you” Hajime replied and then lifted his arms, taking off his shirt too.
Tooru swallowed, watching his pectorals moving, his delicious abs...
Hajime did him the favour, crawling into bed with him just like that and it took the other some seconds to calm down his heartbeat.
“As I said, just tell me” Hajime teased, pulling Tooru into his bare arms.
The brunette only smiled sheepishly, inhaling Hajime’s comfortable scent, loving the feeling of his skin on his own.
He left a soft kiss on the other's chest and then, just like that, his eyelids shut slowly, and he drifted off...his mind at ease, when he fell finally asleep.
*
No dreams - no nightmares, to be correct. Tooru even woke up refreshed, with a light feeling of happiness, which still lingered in his chest...and disappeared in an instant, when he noticed that nobody was with him.
The other side of the bed was empty, cold. He sighed and closed his eyes again.
Hajime left...how silly of me making him stay over, when he probably is more comfortable at his own home...
The peace he had felt before disappeared too, and the little demons started to intrude his mind at the slightest chance.
But suddenly, when he inhaled deeply, a delicious smell got into his nostrils.
Something he hadn't smelt for a long time.
Pancakes?!
Yes, Hajime had left the bed, but not the apartment. He was actually standing in the kitchen with a sweet smile on his face, whistling a bit. Swirling the pan in his hand, the pancake flew up the air and landed in the pan again. He had to adjust the angle a bit, but caught it.
Chuckling, the forensic doctor was so focused on his task to prepare a proper breakfast, that he wouldn't have noticed if someone had entered the kitchen. He shoved the pancake to the others on a plate, then switching off the stove and collecting everything else on a tray.
Getting back to the bedroom, he blinked, as he saw the half-awake detective, his hair all messed up, rubbing his eyes.
Hajime couldn't think of the last time he had had such a long and regenerative sleep. Waking up next to Tooru, who had been sleeping, being able to watch him for a little while. He even put on the shirt Tooru had lent him the night before, because a cool breeze of air made him shiver, but also because it had that cosy scent of his boyfriend stored.
And Tooru had been right: it was a little bit too small and showed off a lot of his arm muscles and torso. Maybe that was the reason why Tooru couldn't avert his eyes for half a minute?
“Good morning," Hajime smiled at him, coming over, while Tooru was sitting up properly and sat down on the bed, with the tray on his lap, “How have you slept?”
Tooru looked at the prepared breakfast, the brown sugar, the glass of orange juice, totally surprised.
“I thought...you left...?!” Tooru replied quietly but sincere, looking up into Hajime’s eyes, as if he had to prove himself that the other was really there with him. That it wasn't a dream.
“What? Why should I?” Hajime seemed puzzled, “I promised you I’d make breakfast, didn’t I?”
Carefully leaning over, he gave him a good morning kiss. Making himself a little bit more comfortable next to him, the tray now put down in front of them, and he placed one of the pancakes on the empty plate to hand it to him with fork and knife.
“I...I just thought you'd left for work” Tooru answered.
“Just for now...work has to wait for at least one hour. We’re spending a lot of time working, and we're both determined, but...I also want to spend some time with you. Privately. Just...doing some couple stuff and all."
Being honest about his intentions, he felt a bit awkward as he had never had that wish for intimacy on different levels with another person and therefore he hadn't experienced all this stuff.
“I’m not sure if you go for plain or sugar, or syrup...I just took both. But as for my recommendation...” Hajime pointed at the small bowl with sliced bananas, “These and syrup are the best way to enjoy!”
“I’ve always dreamt of eating pancakes with you, Hajime” Tooru chuckled sweetly, the left corner of his mouth twitching in amusement, “You know, I love bananas and syrup on pancakes!”
Hajime's eyes opened wide: “Yours, as well?! Not true!”
That made him laugh and he put a pancake on his plate as well, going for the banana slices and the syrup, “Then...have the first?” Hajime muttered, cutting a piece out of it and holding it in front of Tooru’s lips.
With a happy smile, Tooru got that bite. Hajime was feeding him...so cute. This even made his heart race.
“Mhm!~ Delicious!” Tooru stated, as he chewed the spongy sweet food and held out his own fork in front of Hajime’s lips.
“Try it!”
He loved pancakes, he loved Hajime, and spending time with him was everything he needed so far. He felt...reborn.
And it was the other way around too. Hajime smiled when he was watching him enjoying a simple pancake so much.
“Then I’m glad” Hajime said, now having the same task to do and, with a little blush on his cheeks, because he had never had someone feeding him...he took the bite and agreed.
“Tastes good!” he brushed off a crumble of his lip with his thumb then, “It has been a while since I’ve made them...I’m happy they turned out like this.”
Then focusing on the next bite to get, he added: “And...how can the day start better than this? Don’t worry...if I ever have to leave before you, I’ll leave you a note at least. And a photo. You look very cute while sleeping!”
Tooru choked, hitting his chest hard with his fist to make the pancake crumble fall into the right spot and coughed a bit in shock.
“What do you mean?! What did you do?!”
Did Hajime...took a picture of him while sleeping?!
But the culprit only hummed, continuing to eat.
“You’ll like it for sure.”
Actually, he had chosen that picture as his homescreen on the phone.
“Take a look at your messages.”
Tooru struggled a bit. Should he?
He reached then for the device on the nightstand, unlocking it, and actually found a photo sent by Hajime.
His face expression changed...first, his eyes showed surprise, then excitement, then some kind of happiness.
The picture was actually good. He laid on his right side, hands under the pillow, his face so peaceful...but how and when did Hajime take that?!
“You...instead of sleeping you take pictures? How cute of you Iwa-chan, that you’re so obsessed with me!” Tooru teased, smiling innocently now to cover up his own embarrassment.
"Oh shut up!" Hajime blushed, "Maybe I am...because...I’ve never been loved like this and...because I’ve never been in love like this..."
Chewing another bite then, he added, "Plus we haven’t had a picture together, and uh-"
He was cut off by being dragged by his arm. Tooru put his own around Hajime's shoulders, lifting the phone on eyelevel and activated the camera app.
“Say: aliens are cooler than Godzilla!”
"Godzilla always trumps aliens!" Hajime talked back on purpose, playing with Tooru's patience.
But then he leant in, being very close now, and his grin changed to a smile.
“Let’s make a few...” he muttered, putting his hand on Tooru’s, which was about pushing the button and did it instead of him.
Kissing his beautiful boyfriend with a smirk, he let the button go, after pressing it several times, putting the phone down and just kept kissing him. Tooru was shut up in the best way, he couldn't complain about.
Melting into the kiss, feeling so warm, loved and safe, he shuffled himself more into the other's arms, love drunk in the morning.
Being released after reaching a state of being breathless, Hajime took his phone, checking on the photos.
“This...this isn’t fair!!" Tooru now pouted, trying to rearrange his messy hair.
"I think it is!"
But peeking to him from the side...seeing how red his face was in arousal. So lovely. Hajime stared at him for a moment.
"God...I could just kiss you right now again" Hajime murmured, clearly blushing himself, but decided to go for distraction to calm down the heat inside him, the desire to do so much more in the morning than just eating pancakes and kissing him.
Clearing his throat, Hajime showed Tooru the pictures.
"I love that one...and these too" he stopped at the one with all the surprise of the moment in it and then swiped to the next ones, where you could see all the love in their kiss - so intimate and chills-giving. And the last was just them, looking at each other in the eyes...happily.
“They’re all beautiful because you're in there” Tooru murmured, kissing Hajime on his cheek and suddenly a thought plopped out, making him almost shout the other's name, “Tonight! I want to to surprise you! So come here tonight, at eight!!”
"O-o-okay!!" Hajime had nearly jumped, looking still shocked, "I-I will be here! 8 PM."
Blinking, he asked himself why Tooru was so serious about it, but cupping his boyfriend's cheeks he whispered, "I’m looking forward to it. Until then...can I ask for some kisses which will bring me through this long day of work?"
Tooru smiled in agreement, and...despite the tray on the bed, he jumped on Hajime, making him fall back on the bed.
“T-Tooru! W-watch out-" Hajime exclaimed, because of the tray, but Tooru started kissing him everywhere: his lips, his cheeks, his forehead, his nose, his lips again.
Totally relaxed, Hajime could just focus on all the little teasings, which made his skin tingle all over and then Tooru kissed him passionately on his lips. Hajime looked up, looked into those chocolate brown orbits which made him fall for Tooru again and again. Feeling the soft sucking, which let him give a low moan in response as their tongues met.
Hajime’s hand reached for Tooru’s neck, pulling him closer, groaning his boyfriend’s given name.
Tooru only got more excited, and couldn't stop until they were both out of breath.
Once they pulled away, Tooru rested his forehead against Hajime’s, just feeling that moment of pure love.
His breath was flat, his eyes glistened in a yearning Tooru had awaken in him at that moment. The face slightly red, the lips a bit swollen...
Tooru had never seen Hajime like that, being so drowned because of a kiss.
Beautiful.
So, so beautiful.
And Tooru wished to see him like that so much more. Of course he was a bit scared.
Scared of leaving Hajime alone, when he'd met up with Mori, as he couldn't predict how that meeting would end.
And so he just wanted to see Hajime one last time, just in case. Leaving him at least with a beautiful memory...
"Tooru..." Hajime's voice was still hoarse, his fingertips tracing the other's cheek.
“Hajime...” Tooru gave him a last peck on the lips, and then got up, releasing him from his embrace.
“You need to go to work, and I need to prepare my surprise!” he suggested and observed the forensic doctor, running a hand through his hair. He was still in a daze.
"Yeah, seems so. So...anything...I need to know? Clothes? Something to bring with me?" he asked and sat up properly, stretching a bit before he got out of bed.
“Just yourself. I only need Iwaizumi Hajime” Tooru chirped with a wink.
*
When Hajime left, he dialed Kuroo’s number immediately, looking at the mess in his apartment.
“Hello?”
“Kuroo, I need you!” Tooru shouted out, almost pleading.
“Wo-wo-woah! What is it now?!" Kuroo's voice sounded surprised and shocked that he couldn't even take a breath. He wasn't even greeted first by the other - nothing new.
But the urge of Tooru's words scared him. Fortunately, it was nothing bad and his friend explained the reason behind his sudden call soon enough.
“I want to make a surprise for Hajime tonight! I want to cook some-”
“You want to what?! Are you crazy?! Do you want to start a fire again?!” Kuroo yelled and cut him off before he'd even finished the sentence.
“Actually...if you teach me, it won’t happen!”
“Ugh...fine. I’ll send you...a recipe. I can’t come though, as I have a lot of work” Kuroo sighed after a few seconds of silence, "This should even work for you! It's not too complicated. But really, the next time don't be so spontaneous!"
“Thank you," Tooru replied with an exhale of relief.
But the chemist's answer reminded him of the real reason behind his intentions.
"And...also for everything you did for me. You are the best friend I've ever had, even if I’ve never said it to you.”
“Oikawa...you’re not going to die, are you? Are you sick?” Kuroo stated, but realised too late that it wasn't that impossible.
“No, actually not" the detective started, "I don't plan to die, but...I’m going to meet Mori tomorrow. Therefore...I wanted to say those things. Just in case” Tooru said, smiling through the phone.
"Are you serious?!" Kuroo yelled immediately after he made sure he had understood correctly, "He’s going to kill you, why have you accepted to meet him?!”
“I just want my revenge for Heiji’s death. I want to put an end to it. And...it can’t happen if I stay here, doing nothing."
Reasonable. Hence, the chemist sighed again.
“Now...I understand why you want to surprise Iwaizumi tonight...”
“Don’t tell him a thing” Tooru requested deadly serious, “He mustn't know about this!”
“Okay, but listen...you know how much he'll suffer from being left-out if...something happens to you, right?"
“I know, and I’m cursing myself for this.”
Tooru hung up and damn...of course he felt guilty. So damn guilty because Hajime couldn't live a normal life with him.
Because that case was still not closed. Because there was still something between them, and he wanted to change this. He wanted to make a change, for both of them.
He had a plan. He wasn't going to die.
*
Hajime walked off to his own flat quickly, got into new clothes and then took the car to get faster to work.
Going there, Akane was already in the morgue, doing some researches and preparing samples.
"Ah, Iwaizumi-san! Morning!" she greeted all cheerfully, "You know...I thought through everything and it really is strange that the body was like this, isn’t it?"
Hajime took off his jacket, smiling to himself as he let her continue talking.
Clever girl!
"Morning, and...what do you think it is?"
"I thought that maybe...maybe she wasn't murdered there, but somewhere else and thrown into the river? So...that we would find her there?"
"Good conlusion" he stepped over, looking at her document which was put next to the microscope. She had made good progress and he was actually proud of his little intern who had such good potential to be a great forensic herself in the future.
"I...was at the riverside once more with officer Sawamura yesterday" he told her, as she lifted her eyebrows in curiosity, "I also thought about this possibility, and you're right. She hadn't been murdered there and she was thrown into the river after. Small hints, as the killer wanted to lead us to a case from a few years ago."
"I knew it!" Akane exclaimed, all excited and felt her own heart pounding very hard against her chest.
"I’ll still have to talk to Kuroo" he looked at her seriously and it made her calm down a bit more, "Listen, there's something really important right now...remember the letter which was found? If...anything like this arrives here, something you haven’t ordered, don’t you ever put a finger on it, okay?“
She nodded.
"I don’t want you to open a real letter bomb. So...if there’s something like this, then just tell me, Keiji or Kuroo."
Turning around with a wry smile, he announced to be back in five minutes, walking over to Kuroo's laboratory and knocked.
Just some minutes before, the chemist had talked to Tooru and sent him the cooking advices.
"Hey, good morning...got a minute?“ Hajime asked, before he stepped in.
“Sure, what’s up?” Kuroo looked up and smirked.
Funny. It was like telepathy. One had just hung up, and the other rushed in.
Hajime came over, leaning on the table next to him, crossing his arms.
“Actually, it’s pretty serious. I don’t know if you heard about it, but we’re unrolling the case from four years ago. You know, when Yui was hospitalised because of the letter bomb and also the same case Tooru’s partner died. The reason for fighting with Miya recently, sorry again for that...” the forensic doctor added, rubbing his neck.
“I just...want to make sure that you’re all informed. I expect something from the killer. Like the last time. And I just told Akane to be cautious.
So...if there’s anything you notice...well you know, that’s a code black or orange. I don’t want to let this happen again or...even worse.”
He clearly thought of Tooru now, as his expression changed, becoming all worried and a bit sentimental.
“Don’t worry, I’m well aware of that” Kuroo promised, “But can it be...that you have been investigating or...have discovered something?”
He knew that there was something off and also something that Hajime and Tooru were hiding something from each other.
The forensic doctor didn't try to look startled, but he was. A strange smirk appeared on his face.
“So...do you?” Hajime asked back, “I...have seen the same look on Daichi’s face yesterday...well, nothing new, but the bodies were thrown into the river, and the river led us to the place where Tooru’s partner died. Daichi was obviously shocked and told me about it.”
“Are you...” Kuroo couldn't finish the sentence, as he was shocked to hear that.
Not because of the circumstance, but because there was actually a link to the past events. He now totally understood, why Tooru was so determined about meeting Mori. He surely had deducted Hajime's discoveries too.
“Are you...aware what it means?”
Hajime watched him for a longer time.
"That I could be the next target? Didn't expect otherwise. Last time our team was a hindrance. This time...I am even more, because I’m linked to Tooru...yeah. Could be worse."
The shorter male shrugged, as it couldn't be helped. There was always the danger which came with their job.
"The fact that he’s playing with us, wanting to see us investigating, giving us clues and hints...nothing new by a psychopath like him and actually, it gives us more time” Hajime said calmly, “I won’t hold back here. If I’m his target nevertheless, then I can work full-hearted, right?”
“Iwaizumi” Kuroo began, with his own knitted eyebrows, “You know that you are the most important person to Tooru, right? If something happens to you...he’ll be destroyed and won't survive this. Not again. Not when his partner now is also the one he loves the most...”
“And I won’t survive, if Tooru's the one who gets killed” Hajime snapped back in an instant, looking aside then, “I...I know. I know that he's already trying to keep me out, and I’m not pushing him to anything. I don’t ask him questions in detail. But...I can’t stay here and do nothing!”
He ran a hand through his hair, “I mean...who knows how long Mori has been observing us? His message two days ago was a welcome for our team. We’re already in! If that jerk wants to kill one of us, Tooru can’t avoid it. We all know that”
Exhaling, he looked up again, “The best thing I can do is staying alive, right? And that’s what I want to have for Tooru too. I need him. I still...have to marry him for real someday.”
Hajime had that sheepish smile on his face, knowing too well that he sounded naive, “I don’t want to risk things, Kuroo. But I have to support him and therefore, I need to know more than my job would let me know. The victims themselves aren't the important things, they are distractions. But they tell us the story from the past. And lead us to it again.”
Tooru can’t avoid it...
That sentence kept replaying in Kuroo’s mind, and then he listened to the rest of Hajime’s words, he wasn't so sure of that...
Tooru could avoid it. There was a way he could do so.
“You...really want to marry him, huh?” the chemist murmured, smiling softly and somehow sad at Hajime's promise.
"Eh...it’s still too early. I just mean...one day. I don’t even know, if he's into marriage or so and uhm..." he stammered, not knowing what to say at all. Hajime rubbed his neck.
“Please, if you want to help Tooru, you have to stay safe. Don't dig too deep into this case. You know what Mori is capable of” Kuroo said, serious and concerned.
"I know...I read through the archive files...we have to be utterly careful."
Hajime inhaled, turned around and was about to leave, but there was something else on his mind.
"You know...for the first time I can understand why the partners of police officers or firemen are always on guard and worried. I really can understand now" he started, his hand fumbling with the surface of the workstation's table, still lost in thoughts, "I love my job and still...right now, I wish that we just work in a common boring field. I don’t wanna lose him. Not when it took me so long to find him..."
Leaving the office with those words, Hajime went back to his own work and started to teach Akane her new lesson for today. After her first part-time autopsy, she should now dig her nose more into the related analysis.
Just when she hung over the books all over again, he started to catch up with the archive documents on his desk, and wrote down notes on an empty sheet of paper, which was filled quickly. The bodies, where they were found, the location, where it leads...the poison, the biohazards back then and now.
He needed a map, he needed to understand more, and also to take precautions for themselves.
*
Oikawa tidied up every corner of his house. He put some candles everywhere: the living room, the kitchen and - why not - the bedroom. He just hoped that the house wouldn't set fire.
Then he began with the cooking. He wanted to make some agedashi tofu, the recipe Kuroo had sent him with the note that it was Hajime's favourite. As the main dish: ramen. But the most important thing was the cake.
He wanted to bake a cake full of the love he felt for his Iwa-chan.
But good purposes didn't always lead to a great result: first, he burned some of the vegetables he wanted to fry for the ramen. The agedashi tofu didn't seem to taste like agedashi tofu at all. But what was worse was the cake itself. It didn't stay in shape at all. It dripped all over the plate.
And Tooru fell on the ground, giving up. Maybe he was being over-dramatic there, but he couldn't help his tears starting to flow down his cheeks.
“I can’t even do this for him...” he cried, sobbing loudly.
*
It was right about six o'clock, when Hajime was finished with work and left the hospital. Returning home, he sprinted into the bathroom to had a short shower. Drying himself with a towel, he changed into nice clothes, chosing a black collar shirt which tightened a bit around his chest, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and dark denim jeans.
He looked into the mirror and...also refreshed his shave, trying to do his hair a little bit more neat than usual...feeling all excited.
Why was it, that his heart was pounding so hard like that? Just because he was going to see Tooru again? Love could make someone feel like this?
A smirk crawled up, and then he left the house with a small bag in his hand. This time, he didn't forget his stuff for the sleep over.
Putting everything on the backseat of the car...he thought for a moment. Then he took off his necklace to remove the ring, and he put it on his finger again.
It felt much better.
He got himself into the vehicle and started driving. Passing a flowershop, he made a quick stop and went inside.
Hajime didn't know much about flowers, but then decided with his gut feeling, and soon had a daffodils themed bouquet in his hand with three red roses inside. Special, but that was just right.
Leaving the shop, he turned to the drugstore next to it. Walking straight to a special area, he hadn't been standing in front of for quite a long while.
Maybe I’m misreading something...but...at least it won’t do harm to have these?
With a proper blush on his face, Hajime grabbed a tube and a certain package and went to the cashier desk.
Geez...what are you so embarrassed about?!
Finally, he arrived at Tooru’s place, and when he was standing right in front the door...he got even more excited.
Damn heart!
Knocking twice, he waited. Guests never intrude.
*
Tooru recovered from his breakdown and changed his dirty clothes from all the cooking into some casual, but elegant ones.
He combed his hair fluffier than usual, and then he washed his face from the previous crying. His eyes were still a bit puffy and slightly red, but Hajime would'ot notice at all.
Thank God, he had showered that morning, because for this he wouldn't had time now, as th door was knocking right after he got himself prepared.
With a wide spreading smile, he almost flew to the door, opened it and greeted his love with a cute "Iwa-chan!"
It just felt like a “Welcome home” Hajime had never heard before, and it made him feel already damn happy.
And as he had a second to look at his boyfriend from head to toe, seeing the adorable clothes he was wearing - a lighter collar shirt, the first two buttons left open, grey pants, his hair so...soft-looking...and those sparkling eyes! That smile! Hajime was already melting.
“Good evening, my love~” he spoke in a low tune, leaning in to greet him with a light kiss on the lips. After putting a little distance between them again, he held up the small bouquet.
“I hope these aren't too offset” he explained, “But I thought...well...I thought they suit you.”
And as he was invited and stepped in now, he took off his coat, then his shoes.
Tooru’s heart beated so fast now, seeing Hajime’s smile, feeling his kiss and...that beautiful bouquet he was handing him.
“Daffodils...remind me of you, Hajime” Tooru spoke sincerely, as a soft smile cracked up his face, “Close your eyes” he then said as the other had got rid of the unnecessary clothes, and took his hand to lead him into the kitchen.
Coming closer, he placed a light kiss on Hajime's cheek, and gave him allowance to open his eyes again.
What Hajime found was a table, perfectly set with tablewear, plates and everything, and a bottle of red wine and lit candles. On Hajime’s seat there was also a little daffodil.
“I picked it up myself in my little secret park...there are plenty of them. As I said, they remind me of you” Tooru smiled all sweetly and Hajime couldn't stop but smirk himself.
“Of me?” he asked puzzled, but seeing that wonderful romantic ambient, his lips parted...no, he couldn't say anything at all. He turned to his boyfriend, his eyes shown the emotion he felt, how touched he was right now.
“That...really means a lot to me, Tooru” Hajime admitted quietly, looking at the perfect table set again, “It’s perfect. Just...that you made that effort for me...that is a first. And funny, how our minds seems to be connected” he nodded to his bouquet in Tooru's hand and to the little daffodil on his seat.
“My soul has always been connected with yours, but I was too blind and stubborn to see it, Hajime” Tooru held Hajime’s chair back, so he could sit down, a little bit flustered by the other's words, “I ordered some ramen, I hope you’ll like it...”
And he tried to hide his frustration, because of the things he cooked for Hajime that hadn't turn out well. At least Hajime would eat something edible and tasting now. Better than his shitty cooking.
“Don’t worry. You can’t do anything wrong with that.”
But then, Hajime noticed how Tooru’s nose wrinkled a bit and also that his eyes showed...anger?
“Wanna tell me something?” Hajime asked gently, “Something happened. It's your nose” he pointed at his own, lightly smirking.
He was well aware of even such small changes in Tooru’s facial expression. Usually, the detective would have cocked an eyebrow, maybe given back a sassy comment, but right now, he only lowered his gaze, fumbling with his fingers on the tablewear.
“I...I wanted to cook for you. I made agedashi tofu, some ramen and even a cake, but...I fucked it all up" Tooru explained with an upset undertone. Upset about himself.
His opposite nodded, looked up to working space, and then to Tooru again.
“Still have something left?”
He was serious about it. And so he added, “If you have...let me taste at least. You put so much effort in it, I know you, and no buts until you’ve thrown it all away.”
“I don’t want to poison you with my food, Hajime...” Tooru still hesitated, looking at him, “And my effort didn’t pay me back at all...not even this once.”
Yeah, maybe he was a bit of an overdramatic person, but for him it was a loss. He wanted to show Hajime that he could cook for him, that he could do something for him too. And there, he failed miserably.
“So...you still have some bites?” Hajime raised his eyebrow, “I don't think you can poison me with anything you did. Come on!”
He stood up, going on his own in the kitchen and found actually the pot with some of the left over ramen soup.
“N-no! Hajime!”
Tooru's eyes widened and he knew exactly that a huge mess was awaiting his boyfriend there. Covering his eyes with his hands in embarrassment, he couldn't do anything now. Nothing.
He will so hate me!
“I mean, to be fair you tried one of the hardest things!” Hajime called over, opening the drawer to take a spoon, “Making ramen, I mean.”
He then dipped the spoon carefully in, looking curiously with his back turned to Tooru.
The dish didn't look disgusting or anything. He took a sip.
...bitter taste.
Clearly because of something burned. But Hajime tried to taste the other ingredients too and actually...
“You went for a spicier one, right?! The kimchi came out well. That’s good, because if you choose the vegetarian one, you need something strong as you don’t have beef bouillon. And...” Hajime noticed something else, pausing in his sentence and focusing on the pan next to the pot.
He took the thing out of it quickly, and smiled.
“Tooru, you...wanted to serve me agedashi tofu?!”
Turning around, you could see Hajime's sparkling olive-green eyes. Something, which didn't show up so often.
Agedashi tofu: it was his favourite food.
And once more, he took a bit, now showing his facial expression directly as he did...his eyes were closed. Chewing carefully, swallowing it.
Oh, Hajime...you don’t have to force yourself like this...
“Actually...” Hajime said, with a stern expression, “We'll talk about the sauce another time, but the tofu itself is very good!”
He returned to the table with a grin and bent down to his love.
“Really Tooru...it could be so much worse and I won’t lie to you! Thank you...” he kissed him softly.
“It’s awful, I know. You don’t have to eat it...” Tooru muttered, kind of nervous.
But while looking around, averting eye-contact, he noticed himself that he forgot about the most important thing he had wanted to prepare beforehand. Cream, which kept dripping from the oven he had left open.
Oh no...the goddamn cake...!
“It’s not awful I told you!" Hajime insisted with a little frown, not noticing at all, "As I stay honest with you...yeah. Still to be improved but- What is it?” now he got Tooru's shocked look and turned his head over his shoulder again.
Looking at the cream dripping.
Now he was really curious. Without a word, he walked to the oven, opening it slightly, as he already saw the cream mess inside. It was too hot for the cake there, and probably it should have been put in the refridgerator, the whipped cream not baked at all.
But still...
Hajime looked at the cake, sighing with a warm feeling in his heart.
“You worked so hard...all for me” he said then, taking the cake out and wiped off the cream from the oven.
“You tidied up everything, put on decoration, cooked...even wanted to bake me a cake."
Tooru just glanced over with guilt in his chest, as Hajime was now even cleaning the mess here. However, what he said then was nothing the detective would've ever been able to imagine.
"God, why am I...so blessed with you? Being by my side?”
Yeah, Hajime felt overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by all the little things he could have never imagined someone would do for him.
Absolutely happy.
He came back after five minutes, sitting down and took Tooru’s hand in his. Rubbing the back gently, almost having tears in his eyes.
“Thank you...thank you so much. I’ll make sure that I show you the sauce of the agedashi tofu someday” he joked and chuckled, “But don’t ask me for baking. I don’t understand that part of making food.”
“I told you that I wanted to surprise you, Iwa-chan...” Tooru replied somehow relieved.
It wasn't the disaster he had forseen. Not the drama and change of Hajime's heart he had felt.
“But I’m a mess, and it's me who is the most blessed here...having you with me, Hajime...”
He didn't even notice that at first one tear escaped his eye corner. But when the second one followed, Tooru blinked and could only shook his head in disbelief.
He was so happy that Hajime was there...that he accepted every part of him. He was just so relieved, he felt so safe and so loved that it seemed his body couldn't help it but cry because of that happiness.
“Guess...we're both blessed then” the forensic doctor whispered back and caught the tears with his lip, bending over the table, before they could fall down.
“It’s...all I could ask for. You know...I’ve somehow dreamt of maybe having one day a person by my side who would wait for me...and...maybe making dinner. I never thought that this would really happen.”
His fingers intertwined with Tooru’s, the hand with the ring on. Tooru caressed each finger with his own, then looking down as he noticed the metal shape of the ring under his thumb.
“You...put it on” he exhaled, looking him in the eyes.
“I mean...I’m not at work, so I can wear it" Hajime explained, "And being all private here...you don’t know how much more service you get in a flower shop with a ring on!” Hajime joked and looked him in the eyes too.
Tooru then took off his own necklace, being watched carefully by the other, and removed off the ring from it.
“This is what brought us together, isn’t it funny?” Tooru smiled sheepishly.
“You can say so...your flirting was even more infatuating than you had prepared me” Hajime replied with a smirk and then carefully took Tooru's ring, hesitating for a little moment.
“And as I said...it's not so bad being your fake-husband. But now...” he glanced from the other's slim fingers, looking up again, “I also think it wouldn't be so bad to be your real one, as well."
And Hajime went to move the ring gently over the finger joints until it fit perfectly. Tooru blushed madly during that procedure, hearing his words, and...
“Yes” the word came out without even thinking about it properly.
“Y-yes?!” Hajime repeated with almost no voice, totally stunned.
Blinking, he felt how his heart skipped a beat - no, two. Beating again, much faster. That wasn't an intended proposal, but...speaking his mind, what his heart was telling him...
No, he wanted to be with that man.
He wanted to be with him his whole life and...he wanted to marry him. He wanted to make it real.
“Tooru...” Hajime's smile became very gentle, and he stood up, coming around the table and bending down.
No return.
Lifting Tooru’s chin with his hand he approached the other's lips.
“Then...marry me, Oikawa Tooru. Marry me and be my real husband...in the future” he whispered.
An indescribable moment. Time was standing still. There was nothing more important than them now.
Nothing more to take care of, to notice, to focus on. Only them.
“Yes, Hajime...with all my heart” Tooru answered in a whisper as well, and they sealed that promise with an endearing kiss.
Toou hadn't given it a single thought that Hajime would propose to him. Not now. Maybe never.
It was overwhelming, maybe they even went overboard and rushed things, but right now: it was just perfect.
They felt happy, full of love. Happy about a future together. Optimistic in every way, as they had their heads hung in the clouds.
Just Tooru...just Hajime...
The latter took his now fiancé's hand, pulling him up to be on eye level, as he was kissing him.
“Tooru...I love you...I...love you so much...” the forensic doctor muttered, holding him tight.
He couldn't get enough of tasting his lips. Those lips who said Yes.
To him. To marriage. To them.
It was just the perfection of everything that let Hajime taking the lead, asking for entrance with his tongue and making Tooru moan softly.
“I...I love you, too...Haji...” he exhaled, but then tigthened the grip around Hajime's hand.
With a meaningful expression in his chocolate brown eyes, he stepped away from the table, leaving it for now. Leading Hajime further, across the corridor, to the bedroom.
"I...you...are you going to spend the night here?" the detective asked with a little insecurity he couldn't hide.
Hajime felt like being in trance, standing now on the threshold to the bedroom and catching a quick glimpse of the room decorated with candles too.
He tried to snap back into reality, which was a little hard and it seemed he also realised now what it could lead to.
“No that’s...that’s...uhm, exactly...” with a red tint on his cheeks, he paused, looking aside for a moment, but took up his courage then.
“I’d love to...” Hajime admitted, cupping his love’s cheek with his palm, “I’d really love to...spend the night with you...”
*
Hajime smelt like...daffodils.
The kissing felt so good...it didn't matter where he was kissed. It didn't matter where he was touched by solid and still so gentle hands.
How those finger tips ran slowly from Tooru's waist to his shoulder, stopping by his cheeks and pulling him closer.
“Tooru...you’re all I need. You’re all...I need right now” Hajime muttered, totally love drunk, going on to caress the other’s soft skin of his neck, tracing down the line of his tendons, “You’re...all I want...”
“Only right now?” Tooru teased with a little smirk, as he was already melting under Hajime's touch, getting goosebumps all over his body.
He tilted is head a bit, kissing the shorter male's cheeks and his nose and his temple. Everywhere he could reach, as he was laying below him on the bed.
“Dumbass, of course not...” Hajime chuckled against Tooru’s skin, but didn't remove his lips from the crook of his neck.
Instead he started to use his straightforward mouth there for a soft sucking, until he got a remarkable result in red-purple.
“...but right now...”
Hajime looked into his boyfriend’s eyes with a sincere expression.
“I don’t care for anything else, and I can’t think of anything else. And I just...so utterly want to touch you...” he mumbled, not even embarrassed anymore to express his desires so openly.
They had already crossed the line. They were already more than just friends or colleagues. It was only natural that he wanted to make love with him...
“Then...” Tooru announced, running his palm down Hajime’s chest and feeling every muscle there, although he was still wearing his black collar shirt.
“Please, touch me Hajime.”
Hajime groaned quietly, as their lips collided again. Those few words were played in an endless loop in his mind. Echoing in his head, resonating. Making him feel dizzy. The heat that rushed to his cheeks, as he felt Tooru’s hand directly over his heart.
Responding to that kiss with even a little harshness, maybe more impulsive and wilder than before, he asked the man under him for an intimate dance of their tongues.
His fingers wandered across his lover’s chest, slowly, finding the entrance between the buttons of his shirt and caressing the naked skin beneath in slow and teasing strokes.
Tooru gave a little moan and began to unbotton Hajime’s shirt too. He didn't want him to have much advantage there, but it was difficult to focus, because he already felt more and more of the other's fingertips.
But he made it, having the shirt hanging loose around Hajime's toned body and Tooru's chocolate brown eyes gazed at the exposed skin in amazement. Beautiful. So handsome...
Carefully touching his abdomen, his pectorals, he heard Hajime swallowing close to him. He looked up, noticing that the forensic doctor had stopped his own movements as he was welcomed by Tooru's touches.
Catching up with Tooru's shirt now, Hajime took it off with slightly trembling fingers. The excitement grew bigger inside of him, as he was able to have a proper view on the detective, and he bit his bottom lip.
Damn...he had to hold back a bit. Not rushing things.
Still, he so wanted to kiss him, wanted to hear more of the melodies that escaped Tooru's throat every once and a while. Wanted to make a whole symphony out of them.
His kisses wandered right from the shoulder, leaving here and there small red marks.
“I...want to hear you” Hajime whispered, brushing with his lips over the cute shape of Tooru's ear when he leant in, “I want to hear so much more...every note you make...”
But it was Hajime, who couldn't avoid another moan first, when his lover's finger were on discovery across his body. He took his revenge, taking Tooru's earlobe between his lips and finding one of his weak spots.
Smirking, the detective didn't stop, but felt challenged there.
"Let's see who will be heard first" Tooru muttered, and then lifted himself up a bit more, right on the height to kiss Hajime’s hardened nipples tenderly, so the other male kept his eyes shut at first.
Sucking on them then a bit, twirling his tongue around them, the hiss became a sound of pleasure.
While Tooru left a trace of kisses now across his partner's chest, his hands finally found their right place on Hajime’s pants.
Unbuckling the belt first with quick movements as if it was only a lock to be picked, the brunette also undid the zipper and the top button.
“T-Tooru...” Hajime's breath had already become heavier, he felt too much of everything. So much that he wanted even more.
His fingers traced down Tooru's chin, as he had helped Hajime to find his lower part a little bit more at ease, his already hard-on having more space now in the open pants.
"Tonight...I wanna taste you" the forensic doctor exhaled, looking at the other with a slightly embarrassed but daring smile, "If that...it's okay with you"
Tooru's hands rested on Hajime's hips now, and he needed a second to find the proper words. But his own smile was already speaking for itself, so an answer wouldn't have been necessary at all.
“Do you think...that I can ever refuse you?” Tooru whispered, showing the lust that lingered in his eyes. Even his voice was a bit lower than usual.
With that reply, Hajime opened Tooru's pants as well, helping him to get rid of them, then his own followed on the floor, out of bed.
"I don't” Hajime assured him, leaning in to his ear, “So...make yourself comfortable. And I...make sure, you’ll feel good.”
A bold promise, but while he was touching the soft insides of Tooru's thighs, he left soft little kisses all over the pale skin. Sucking on his collarbone, while Tooru teased him in return with his tongue over his nipples.
It was a little fight of domination.
No one of them wanted to give up, and between all the kissing, all the teasing and all the beautiful sounds, it was in the end Hajime's turn to put his hands on the last remained piece of clothes.
Brushing with his lips and his tongue over Tooru's bellybutton, he went downwards and felt the goosebumps as a reaction of his sensitive treatment.
He didn't want to stop, and therefore stripped the hem over the hipbones with his hands, but used his teeth in a damn sexy way on the frontline, pulling the fabric slowly down, until he noticed Tooru's desperate cock twitching under his lips, and Hajime pulled down the underwear completely. Tooru freed himself from it with his legs, but his eyes were locked with Hajime's who still was sitting between his legs.
Oh my God...
That little smirk, only right-sided, and then flexing his legs gently, kissing his thighs with so much care as Hajime was working his way up to the half-hard member. His hand found the right position, holding the full length in his warm palm, and the shorter male exchanged another quick look with Tooru, before he started kissing the shaft up as a first greeting.
The detective moaned lightly, trying not to be too loud, but-
“Ha-Haji...!” it escaped his throat in a high-pitched voice, and his hips rolled a bit by instinct.
God...it's so good, so so good.
Well, that was new...and Hajime loved it!
Was he able to get Tooru to that again?
He closed his lips totally around the warm cock, taking it all in. Moving his tongue gently over the head in front and also over his slit, he was just about teasing him there a bit more.
Tooru's hand carressed his hair, clenching a bit in surprise. When Tooru was almost complaining with a whimper, Hajime decided to get more serious. His tongue twirling was replaced by a gentle sucking and short breaks. Drawing small circles with the tip of his tongue he looked up, to see Tooru’s reaction.
And Tooru was so focused on his lover, on how well he was taking him, sucking him so good. Hajime's cheeks became hollow and then full again, eating him up alive...
“Gosh...H-Hajime...I...”
Tooru tried. But more than a loud moan of arousal was impossible, he was too close to the edge.
Closing his eyes, rolling them backwards because of the great pleasure, he ran his fingers through Hajime’s dark hair, surprisingly soft. But tightened his grip again, as Hajime continued. He got so carried away that he even pushed him closer, sometimes hitting his throat.
Gagging at first, Hajime got used to it and adapted his pace to Tooru's jolting hips. His hand pressed him closer, leaving him no other choice than taking him very deep.
He had never thought that he would give someone a blowjob. Being so face-to-face with a girl was different, but there...fuck...he liked it. He loved it as he was so in love with that man. With those sounds. How his name left Tooru's lips. How his fingers felt in his hair.
And Hajime felt it, that Tooru was almost done, still he didn't stop. Tooru should receive total satisfaction, should fall in the moment of his orgasm, and Hajime would be there to catch him safely.
The peak camed suddenly as he heard Tooru crying out, a mixture of his name with animous brutish groaning. His cock throbbed desperatly in his mouth, but he took it all. Drinking him up, he didn't let a drop escape his lips.
Tooru's chest rose fast and flat, the sensation still lingering in his eyes, when he looked up because Hajime came back to eye-level. He licked his bottom lip because of a little rest of the salty liquid he had sucked up.
“I love you...I love you Hajime...”
Tooru's body was still shaking, the oversensitivity taking place and Hajime kissed the brunette's forehead carefully. Knowing exactly how weak a person can feel after...
“And so do I...with everything I have" Hajime whispered back and inhaled the other's stronger scent for a moment.
Of course, his own heart was beating in excitement, never forgetting that sensation he had seen on Tooru’s face.
So beautiful...so pure.
What was that thought now? The wish to...wreck him?
“Tooru~” he almost purred, snuggling up to him, “Would you...let me love you even more?”
His voice sounded hoarse, his crotch rubbing lightly against his boyfriend's side. It didn't go unnoticed, and Tooru only needed some more seconds to find some of his composure again. To be able to answer.
Glancing over, he noticed how drunk Hajime really was. How much he kept his shit together, not to jump on him. Tooru felt it.
“If you can do more than this...please...I need your love Hajime" the detective replied quiety, almost...begging. "I need you to love me...and I need to love you back.”
Leaving a kiss on his boyfriend's neck, who flinched, he left another mark there, nibbling the skin with his teeth.
Hajime's pulse raised, he heard his blood rushing in his ears. Enjoying Tooru's lips on his neck and just running a hand through the fluffy hair.
“I can and...I want to feel your love as much as possible.”
However, Hajime pushed him slighty away, apologising, so he could get a few things, and walked with a smirk of anticipation out of the bedroom to his bag on the corridor. Taking out the most important stuff now, he reminded himself to breathe. Keep calm. He could do this. It would be okay.
Why am I so fucking anxious?!
Hajime clapped his cheeks with his palms once. A stinging pain crossed his nerves, but it helped him to get back on track. It had been a good idea to get prepared for the night. Of course, it had only been a just in case thing, but he was glad he did.
But when Hajime returned, his nervousness was still readable in his eyes. Of course, Tooru noticed, and after Hajime had put the two things aside, also taking off his pants now, so that he was only in his boxers, he took the other male's hand, pulling the forensic doctor next to him on the bed,
“Hajime...I love you, and you love me, right? There’s nothing to be worried about” Tooru tried to give him some reassurance, looking him into his olive-green eyes,
“I know it’s your first time with a man...and for me...it’s the first time ever too. But I’ve never been so sure about wanting something like this before, so...if you don’t feel like it, then we can wait.”
Hajime lowered his gaze for a second, because he noticed that his fingers had trembled. But as soon as Tooru had closed his hand around his, the trembling disappeared. Funny.
He looked up again, looking at Tooru’s lips movement as he spoke and listened to his words.
That cute idiot...
“Tooru...” he whispered with a wry smile and happiness all in his chest. Approaching him, he got so close until his breath tickled the other's skin right under his nose.
“There...is nothing else I’d rather do right now...seriously. But...I guess you make my mind just go dizzy and...I just know that I want to love you. In every way...” Hajime admitted, “And you’re right: there's nothing to worry about, as long as we love each other...”
It was just as easy as that.
“I promise...I’ll be careful. Just tell me, if something is weird or so...”
And with that happy smile, he kissed Tooru gently, muttering a “God...I love you...I so damn love you...” all over again like a mantra he had to quote.
Going down on the mattress with his lover once more, his hand caressed the warm body beneath him, worshipping every inch with soft touches. Tooru would always remember the sparkling in Hajime's eyes, full of love and desire.
No more anxiousness. No more fear. Just love.
They laid down, Hajime's hands running all over Tooru’s body, touching softly, but also hungry for more.
Tooru helped him taking off his last piece of clothes, and admired the forensic doctor for the goddamn beauty mother nature had given him.
Hajime then reached over to take the lube, uncapping it.
"Is it...okay for you, being...well, being bottom?" he asked Tooru, to make sure before he would do anything else. They hadn't spoken about that yet.
“This won’t be a problem for me if it’s you who I’m making love with.”
Hajime looked at him with surprise in the eyes, and a sweet red covered his cheeks. Blinking, he averted the eye-contact quickly and cleared his throat.
Damn, he can’t be so cute like that!
"Okay" he only brought out, and focused on the lube in his hand again, pouring some of it into his other palm.
Fuck...that one sentence and that innocent smile made Hajime’s lower region twitch in agony.
Laying back next to Tooru again, he carefully wandered with his hand for the soft butt, touching his destination carefully with his fingers.
"Tell me if it hurts..." he mumbled with an excited heart, as he had never done it before.
Yeah, he knew that it was important to prepare the other for anal sex, nothing new. But doing it...it was different. He had to be careful, as the last thing he wanted was to hurt Tooru.
Hajime kissed Tooru tenderly, and let his index slide in a bit, overcoming the resistance of the rim. Watching his love closely to observe his reactions.
Tooru shut his eyes closed, wanting to close his legs instinctively.
He wasn't used to it, and it felt strange, but...it was Hajime, right?
It was going to be okay. Somehow.
His body tensed and his fingers clutched around Hajime's shoulders. He wasn't in pain, but he couldn't get rid of his nervousness right now.
"Try to stay relaxed...I won’t do anything until you want me to" Hajime released Tooru's lips and kept his promise.
Brushing his lover's cheek with his mouth, he waited a while longer.
Tooru inhaled deeply, opening his eyes again and meeting the other’s olive-green ones. He then relaxed his legs, easing Hajime’s work, and finally the tension in his body vanished a bit.
The brunette nodded slightly to give him the sign, that he could go on. And so Hajime shoved his index in more, going with the pace which was okay for Tooru. He made it with his whole finger then, adjusting to the warm walls round him.
"Little bit better?“ he asked in a mere whisper.
“H-Haji...” Tooru’s said in a shaken voice, “You...can add another one...”
The blush on his face became stronger as he spoke up.
Hajime nodded in silence. That shaky voice of Tooru was another thing that turned him on.
And so he did, going for the second finger and after Tooru could also adjust to it, he calmly started moving them. Doing some stretching, a bit of scissoring. Widening him to be properly prepared for him. And because he heard the opening of those amazing sounds of pleasure again, he also thrusted his fingers inside, making Tooru moan quietly.
It seemed that he liked the feeling...that treatment inside of him.
"You’re beautiful...you’re so beautiful, Tooru..." Hajime muttered, starting to give more pleasure with long and stronger thrusts.
He felt Tooru's nails scratching over his arm, holding on, and his moaning became more audible. Wonderful...
“Mhm...y-you’re...more beautiful than me, Hajime...” Tooru exhaled, looking at him, but squeezing his eyes as Hajime hit a very sensitive spot.
The eyebrows of the shorter male lifted and...he did it again. Curling his fingers inside and making him moan even louder. So much, that Tooru now even tried to suppress them with his hand cupped over his mouth.
Hajime had to smile about the verbal compliment before and the non-verbal now.
"Don’t..." Hajime’s hot breath met Tooru's ear, "Please don’t..."
He took Tooru's hand from his mouth, kissing the palm gently, "I want to hear everything...every sweet note you sing when I'm loving you...“
Is that what is called to be lovesick?
Feeling...high and irrational?
Hajime worked with more intensity now, even using a third finger. Just that was already so nice for Tooru, but his own desire grew bigger and bigger. He had to stay patient.
“Why...why am I the only one to make these sounds? Why aren’t you...singing for me too?” Tooru asked innocently with a heavier panting, looking at him.
Almost pouting, because Hajime had ended his preparations and took out his fingers carefully, leaving him so empty...
And Tooru was impatient. He always had been, he always would be. So damn impatient.
Especially now, as he wanted him. Closer.
Inside him.
"Make me" Hajime gave him a peck on his lips with a grin.
Then he sat up for a moment, getting the package of condoms.
Pulling out one, he ripped the package open carefully, rolling it over his hard member.
Crawling back to Tooru, between his legs, he softly asked his boyfriend to shift his hips a bit up.
"Okay...I start now" Hajime exhaled, trying to lose the raising tension again, and looking into Tooru‘s eyes, his cock already touching the pinkish rim.
"I love you, Tooru. I never thought to find someone like you...and I’m happy I did..."
He took his hand, intertwining their fingers now. Their rings shone through the darkness, as they were both looking into each others eyes.
“I love you Hajime...I-” Tooru stopped when he felt Hajime’s member rubbing harder against his entrance.
He felt excitement rushing all over his body, making him swallow down the lump of anticipation.
Then, Hajime started to shove himself forward, very slowly. It wasn't so easy, he felt how tight Tooru was, how much the latter gave unintended pressure on his cock. But entering him a bit more, he also felt the upcoming warmth. Inch by inch, he got in more.
Obviously, Tooru felt pain, as it was his first time after all. Hajime had prepared him very well, but still it was a bit painful.
He didn't know how long it took them, until he felt all of Hajime's cock in him.
And hell...that feeling was...indescribable.
"Is it... bearable?"
Tooru's walls twitched around Hajime’s member, sweeping it, and Tooru moved his hips carfully, trying to adjust more. He then nodded, giving a sign that Hajime could try to do something more.
Hajime held his breath, shifting his hip a bit back and forth and God...Tooru's low moaning now gave him the chills. A low groan left his own throat, as he felt the adjustment, felt that Tooru's walls didn't clench around him that much. The tight pressure around his member was much more enjoyable now.
Hajime's hand ran from Tooru's side to his butt, giving him more support there. The sensation of that overwheling unison kept rising, and as he had been provoked before, the man below didn't have to do much to bring out an audible tune from the top.
The forensic doctor got more used to the feeling. To the heat. To lose the rest of nervousness, and just let himself be dragged into that endless sea of love and passion.
"T-Tooru" he moaned right into his lover's ear, "You...ahh...you feel so good...so fucking good..."
Tooru ran his hands down Hajime's biceps, but then clinging with his fingers on his back as the other was moving in a steady pace now, more passionately.
Hajime hit spots inside him that made Tooru see white stars. And still, he couldn't loose his pride and stubbornness, smirking a bit when he heard Hajime's mumbling, his panting, and accepted the challenge to make it even worse.
His legs wrapped around Hajime's waist, giving him deeper access - which was an actual fucking good idea, the detective had to compliment himself. However, he pulled him closer, pushing him with more force inside.
Although Tooru was moaning first, Hajime replied with a louder groan, his face showing nothing more than lust now, pure satisfaction.
“See? I...managed-aahhh...I m-managed to make you...sing for me” Tooru commented between his moans, a sassy grin on his lips, and caused Hajime to look at him with his usual little frown.
"Oh...s-shut up."
Tooru giggled, and he was so totally relaxed now that his whole body could only respond to the pleasure Hajime's cock was giving him. So much pleasure and joy, real happiness inside him - being so united with the one he loved - that even tears were glistening on his flushed face.
His hips rolled to the rhythm of the other, catching up and finding themselves a perfect combination.
Hajime squeezed his eyes shut in result, as he had never felt such satisfaction before. Real satisfaction. Not the one like jerking off after a few thrusts because the girl knew exactly how to give a efficient hand or blowjob. Not the one when he had did it himself, which was only physically satisfying, but not for the rest of his being.
That was so much more: Tooru's fingernails, digging softly into his back, how he pulled him closer, skin on skin. Also the fact that he couldn't hold back anymore. How they found a rhythm that fitted them, that was perfect...
That taste of their love was extraordinary.
As revenge of Tooru's recent action, Hajime bent his legs even more in the direction of his upper body, coming deeper than before. Tightening his walls up more. He was so much closer to Tooru, only inches apart from his lips, looking at him.
Then he noticed the tears, slightly shocked, but it only needed seconds to understand that those weren't out of pain, but of lust.
Heavy pants filled the thick air in the bedroom, and Hajime reached down for another kiss, as he unfairly thrusted harder, covering the next escaping moan with his mouth.
But Tooru didn't give up either, and let him have that one point of scoring, until he raised up his hips too, laying his legs over Hajime's shoulders now. As the other male looked at him with lifted eyebrows, Tooru just smirked lewdly, looking really hot there, as if he was saying "Try again to fuck me: you'll be the one screaming."
“Mind to...have a duet with me?" he purred.
Hajime knew exactly what Tooru meant. And yeah, of course he didn't mind.
The built up pit in his guts almost became unbearable, and he muttered desperately.
“Why are you...so fucking hot?!”
He went for his ear, sucking on it and biting Tooru's earlobe.
“You're turning me on...so much" Hajime murmured wolfishly, "And you're...taking me so well, Tooru."
Was that praising? Tooru didn't know, but therefore Hajime took advantage, going faster now with his thrusts, instead of doing them with a long and slow move as he had before. He was pulling almost out and then pushing in again.
Tooru swallowed, that approach of dirty talk sent shivers down his spine, but suddenly he felt an intense reaction of his body. It was due to the unintended slight change of angle, and Hajime hit Tooru's weak spot perfectly now, letting him cry out, nails scratching over Hajime's shoulders.
"That's it...ahh...you're so good for me...you're so damn good for me, baby..."
Baby?!
Unfortunately, Tooru's raised eyebrow changed to a knitted one again, as the other did it again. Loud moans of both filled the air.
Hajime pushed forward, faster now, and felt the slick walls clutching around his member even more.
So much, that he actually bit almost too harsh into Tooru’s neck.
“I-I...I can’t keep up for long” Hajime admitted with pursed lips, as he was right on the edge.
And Tooru was for a second time too. His body acted all on his own to the other's twitching and thrusting cock inside.
“Ha...Hajime!!!” he shouted suddenly in pleasure, as he came right up to his own and Hajime's abdomen - just a few seconds before the latter did so as well.
He rushed in an overwhelming feeling. So much, that his vision went white for a moment and he closed his eyes, reaching his climax in a wonderful symphony with Tooru.
"Aaah...T-Tooru~! Fuck..."
Heavy panting, heavy gasping. They were so out of breath, they were so out of energy.
Losing the tension of his muscles, Hajime sunk on his lover. Feeling the still racing heartbeat in his chest. He buried his nose into Tooru's crook of neck.
As Hajime hid his face on that all marked area, Tooru inhaled deeply his scent, caressing his hair. His legs had been released from Hajime's shoulders, resting now calmly besides his man.
Just two or three minutes rest...as Hajime was still inside of him, he tried not to do any further movement to provoke oversensitivity.
Therefore, kissing Hajime softly on his cheek and on his ear, he heard his deep breathing and couldn't help smiling.
“I love you more than anything, my little Iwazilla” he whispered into the shorter male's ear, “It was...an amazing first time. You were amazing, actually. And you...were so prepared for this...that you even brought lube and condoms with you. You really are a pervert, Iwa-chan~”
Of course, he couldn't go on without teasing, as he loved to see Hajime's funny reactions. He didn't have to wait for long: Hajime lifted himself a bit to look into his marvellous brown eyes, but he didn't go for insults or anything. Just...staying sincere.
"I-it’s not...I just had a feeling...I just..." stammering, Hajime looked aside, "Just in case..." he murmured embarrassed, lowering his head again on Tooru's chest, "So stop calling me a pervert...that’s humiliating!"
Tooru stared at him in silence, blinked twice, but then...he had to laugh out loud because of that cute reaction. However, the last sentence made him feel a bit guilty and therefore he kissed Hajime’s forehead as an apology, softly.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!" Tooru insisted, then adding with an amused undertone, "But you have to agree with me that you wanted to do me pretty badly!”
“Oh really? Who was the one wanting to make love with me?"
Oh, he loved Iwaizumi Hajime.
He so loved him.
Pleading was not Tooru’s best skill, but...
“Please” he began, lowering his gaze for a moment, “Please, I want to feel you one more time. I want to love you once more...because...I’ll never have enough of you, Hajime...” Tooru looked at him, with his big brown sparkling eyes, full of love.
Hajime smirked, as he was leaning in again, tapping Tooru's nose with his own.
"Tell me once more who's the pervy one here" giving him a quick kiss on his lips, he added more quietly, almost in a whisper.
"Show me your love again. Show me all your love, Tooru."
Starting all over again, making love, feeling each other, until they would fall asleep in each other's arms.
And even then, Hajime would hold Tooru's hand.
*
It was just when the sun was up, striving the horizon and tickling their noses through the narrow shutter slits, that they woke up again.
Hajime was the first, his mind still a mess and searching for some-
Ah right...
He looked at his side, looking for his love, his future-husband...
Tooru was still sleeping, but awoke slowly, when he felt Hajime’s touch on his forehead. How he caressed his fluffy hair.
“Haji...~” he said in a hoarse voice, and his lips curled up to a little smile, but his eyes were still closed.
Hajime didn't answer at first, just kept stroking Tooru's hair,.
"Yeah...I’m here" he finally whispered, tilting his head more to him and coming closer.
“Still sleepy, hm?”
No surprise...it had been a long night. Hajime noticed all the marks on Tooru’s skin...
God, he really couldn't hold back at all. A little bit embarrassed, he touched one of those marks with his fingertips.
“Should I kiss you awake?”
Moving his other hand beneath the sheets, he caressed softly his boyfriend’s naked waist, pulling him closer. Tooru felt Hajime’s warm and naked body moving against his, and he snuggled up much more.
“I won’t refuse a make-out session on early morning” Tooru grinned now, but was still refusing to open his eyes. It was better waiting for the kisses.
Hajime chuckled, supporting himself on his elbow and leant over, so his boyfriend could get his reward for not waking up on his own. Starting from the temples, to his cheeks, to his jaw line...
“Maybe we share the same opinion about that”
His fingers traced down the defined lines of Tooru’s abs, and then kissed the cute corner of those soft lips, the bottom lip itself, and sucked gently on it.
“Haji...Haji you’re tickling me!~” Tooru laughed, pulling away from the kiss as he would have bitten Hajime's tongue.
He loved it. The way to start a new day.
He wanted them every day.
Never wanting them to end.
And still...maybe it was the last chance Tooru had to enjoy it.
Because that day he had to meet up with Mori.
“Well, that’s the plan” Hajime laughed too, tickling every part of Tooru's body now.
So much, that the other even had to cry and his abdomen started to hurt. Pleading, even begging Hajime to end that torture, the culprit suddenly disappeared under the blanket.
Tooru feared the worst, but instead of that, he felt Hajime's soft lips on his his stomach now. Leaving more kisses on his waist. Up to his chest.
His hands were caressing Tooru’s skin now, very sensually, his kisses wandering like that over the other's body.
Unaware of the upcoming meet-up with that psychopath.
Unaware of what would happen to his team, soon...
Normality, he liked to see. To give to Tooru.
They managed to have breakfast together, but then parted ways, promising one another to see each other after work.
Tooru knew that the promise would be broken.
Yes, he had a plan, Mori wouldn't be able to play with him anymore.
But...of course Tooru couldn't predict his own future there.
He didn't know if Mori wouldn't have any ace up his sleeve.
And Hajime...he felt that something was off.
When they said goodbye and he looked him for a longer moment into his eyes. Wrapping his arms round Tooru tightly, kissing him gently and with all his love.
Telling him, how much he loved him.
So when Tooru went for another direction, he couldn't help it but throwing a look over his shoulder.
*
Hajime made his way to the hospital, a bit lost in thoughts. His mind was still slightly disorientated. Having his hands in his pockets, he played with the ring on his finger, feeling its shape with his thumb.
After a long exhale, getting a grip now to focus on work, he entered the morgue.
Akane was doing her researches. Akaashi was in Kuroo's laboratory, as she told him, having some discussions about the analyses.
Hanging up his coat, Hajime smiled.
His team...they all gave their best. And so should he.
"You're...looking pretty happy, Iwaizumi-san" Akane noticed cheerfully and then... "Oooooh~"
Hajime gave her a startled look, like being caught red-handed, although he didn't know what she had seen.
"W-What?!"
"Is that...a hickey?" she nodded with a devilish grin, and pointed right out to a spot under his ear. One of the many.
"Aaaaaand...since when are you wearing a ring?"
Hajime flinched.
He covered his skin with his hand, all red in the face.
Why hadn't he thought of that?
Of course Tooru had also left him some souvenirs...
"F-Focus on your work!" he ordered, but made her only giggle because of his flustered expression.
"Ah, it's so sweet to see you so lovey-dovey!" she grinned brightly and got then really sincere, "You know...I also want to meet someone I can love like that in the future! True love must be great! I'm really happy for you!"
She turned around to continue working and Hajime just shook his head slightly.
Yeah...his team. Everyone of them was amazing.
Akaashi for his calmness. For his analytic eyes.
Kuroo, even though he didn't go to the crime scenes with them, was the best chemist they could have. Always up to listen and giving ideas a try.
Yui...well. She was the most empathetic one and therefore the best for dealing with people - didn't matter if it was an angry police officer or the victim's relatives who had to identify the body.
And Akane...if she would work there in the future, after her traineeship and studies, she would be the energetic worker, always being two steps ahead of everyone. He was sure of that.
So...why was he feeling so...on guard? All of his senses were in alert, although he felt so happy about the last night, the morning, the people there.
"I'm getting some coffee, what about you?" Akane asked an hour later and stood up from her chair.
"Yeah, good idea" he agreed nodding, "But you know what? I bring the coffees over, and you bring that stuff to the outbox" he suggested, looking at the bunch of envelopes and a small parcel on the desk, next to her.
So they did, and while Hajime was waiting for the drinks in front of the vending machine, he put his head in his neck and closed his eyes.
Breathe. Everything is okay...Don't worry. Everything is okay.
Exhaling, the ping of the vending machine sounded, and the green light symbolised that the two beverages were also ready.
Taking them, careful not to spill the too full and too wobbly plastic cups, he returned and saw Akane already back too, standing with her back to him, as she was facing her desk.
"I put it here on the front, okay?" Hajime said, as it was better to drink coffee out of reach of samples and evidences, of course.
The young woman turned around to him, holding another envelope in her hands and...suddenly, the blood rushed down to his feet, his face all pale in an instant.
"I just forget that one, I guess-"
"DON'T SHAKE IT!"
Hajime's voice echoed loud and let her flinch, totally scared, but before she could react, the coffee cups had fallen out of his hands and he rushed over now, snatching the envelope out of her hands. Though he got a grip on it, his sudden action caused the already pre-perforated contour to open completely.
A fine powder sprinkled over his hand.
Without another warning, he pushed Akane away by reflex, so she stumbled to the door, hitting her shoulder a bit.
"O-Ouch...Iwaizu-"
"Get out!" he yelled at her, "Go to Kuroo. Code Orange!!!"
The frightened woman looked shocked, her eyes even wider now, but did as she was told.
She ran out of the room.
Hajime, now all alone, looked at the envelope, not daring to breathe.
Looked at the white powder that covered his hand and also parts of his shirt.
His nose tickled. The substance had already got into his nostrils.
No need to hold his breath anymore.
Shit...that...was serious.
Pursing his lips, he carefully put down the envelope, trying not to make it even worse.
He then went to the room's phone, and made a direct call to the police.
Six times of ringing, until finally someone was picking up.
"Iwaizumi Hajime here, forensic faculty. We...had a biohazard attack. Please let me speak to officer Sawamura."
He swallowed hard while waiting again, looking down to his contaminated hand.
Looking at the ring.
Maybe...that was the reason why he was so calm now.
Because it wasn't a first.
They had been right...about the whole thing.
The encore had begun.
Notes:
You thought everything was going to be all lovey dovey? All fluff? Mhmm...
Haha, joking. Thank you for all the support, for all of those who follow this fic chapter after chapter, really. Thank you <3
What's going to happen now?
Chapter 15: Premonition
Summary:
“Hajime, please. Trust me. Whatever I’ll do...it’s for your best.”
Notes:
Yahoo, long time no see! I'm sorry, Saru talking here, I've been busy and I'll probably be now too so I'm not sure when I'll update the next chapter, but please be patient! Our boys need to find a way out of this big case, they need all of your support!!
Thank you again, and enjoy this chapter, letting us know what you think, or just enjoying the reading! <3
Chapter Text
A wonderful day. Sunny weather, just a few clouds in the sky, a soft breeze came up.
The blue of the endless sky was only limited by the skyline of Tokyo.
Standing on the top of that building, he was still remembering the day four years ago.
The day the game had begun.
A game with murderous levels. A game with a lot to lose and a lot to win.
It wouldn't be the same win for every participant, but that was even funnier.
"Detective Oikawa..."
Mori turned around, after he had stared at the peaceful view for a moment. Hearing the upcoming footsteps, he knew exactly who had appeared behind him.
His finger tips, that had ordered so many asssasinations, tapped against his thigh, not stopping.
"It has been a while" he greeted his special visitor, "How are you? You seem doing well. Much better than I expected, actually."
The polite smile on his lips remained while he spoke. Little wrinkles of age showed up around his mouth corners.
"Don't you think that it's the right place to have out reunion here? A marvellous skyline around us, blue sky. Wasn't it the same back then? Four years?"
Oikawa only clenched his fists at those provoking words, greeting him with just two syllables, but all the suppressed anger inside were put in them.
"Mori..." he exhaled, his eyes narrowing, "I’m pretty good actually, but not thanks to you."
As he noticd that the other didn't move a bit, he walked towards him and stopped two metres in front of the man he wanted so utterly to see in jail, to arrest so much. Watching him rotting there until he would die.
"I'm surprised that you still remember after all the crimes you did? Ah, no. Which you delegated. I’m flattered.”
"Oh, of course I do!" Mori laughed, not expecting anything else from the brunette, and started walking around him, circling him up like a lion would, before attacking its prey.
"I mean, how could I ever forget!" he stopped in front of the detective, really close, "You couldn't either, right?"
His dark eyes looked sternly at Oikawa, provoking him even more.
"Did you overcome your trauma? It was really a pity for that capable, young police officer who got into the crossfire. Actually, it wasn't my plan to involve someone innocent" Mori put on another fake smile.
“Don’t you dare speak of Heiji, you filthy bastard” Oikawa hissed, his lips slightly trembling.
"Let's talk about the present now. I didn't want to dwell on the past and being all nostalgic here. So, how is your new partner doing? That forensic doctor with his excellent marks and reputation from university, working his way up right to the top? Iwaizumi Hajime."
Mori was clearly enjoying Oikawa's silence, so he continued.
"He's an interesting character," the criminal mastermind went on, "I met him at the supermarket recently. He wasn't so sure about the right type of flour. He wanted to make some kind of casserole. I hoped I could be of any help for him. Is he working today too?"
He already knew too much about Hajime.
Too many information.
Clearly showing them on a silver plate.
A shocked expression broke Oikawa's poker face.
“You...don’t you dare touching him or anyone else! And shut up about not involving innocents - you love it!" Oikawa snapped now, taking a step forward, closing the distance between them even more, “I’m here now, in front of you. Disarmed, no police. Kill me right now, and you’ll have what you wanted for all these years!”
Mori gave him a few seconds of silence, then chuckled very quietly.
"Oikawa-san, it has never been my desire to kill you so...primatively. I'm not a barbarian. You and I...our minds work quite alike, don't you think so?" Oikawa's left eye twitched at that comment.
"Well, actually not now. You're disappointing me. Instead of you, your precious forensic doctor did his homework, and he found out. Seems, love has a little bit distracted your sharp mind, am I wrong?"
“I don’t think your mind is comparable to mine, Mori. Your mind works for evilness, mine for destroying yours. And as for love” Tooru emphasised with a pause, smirking, “You'll never be able to understand that, right? I thought myself that it was a distracting and useless feeling, but actually it’s all a person needs.”
Regaining his composure, Oikawa took a step back and passed him, not turning his back to Mori, though. As you could never predict what one had in his sleeves.
“But it's really funny of you, not wanting anyone of yours to be killed, while you're truly enjoying killing our beloved ones, don’t you think?” the detective chuckled a bit.
"Hm...I don't think it's funny" Mori corrected, "But you know...funny is how composed you try to be, while your eyelids keep twitching whenever I mention his name."
Looking the other in the eye, now deadly-serious, Mori shrugged.
"Your investigation has always ruined my big plans, Oikawa. You asmost ruined me. I'm not a man of revenge out of being in love or such things. But when you and your little pawns carried out a raid...someone of my personal squad had to die in the gunfire. I don't know how to describe it, but I got...a little bit...upset? So you know: I won't kill you here. I'd rather like to make you suffer, back then and now. Oh speaking of that," Mori sounded more cheerfully, turning his head to the skyline as the other didn't even blink.
"Don't you think that it's a pretty modern hospital where our doctor works? They have the best doctors, the best machines and treatmens of our prefecture. Still...they don't care so much about who's going in and out. I wonder if they had new colour codes added since four years ago? I read that there is a whole rainbow flag of those!"
Oikawa clenched his fists again, and brought his hands behind his back - he was too obvious about his feelings. Too obvious with his reactions and emotions. He shouldn't do that.
Although Mori's words didn't make it better, even worrying him more.
He looked at the building, where Hajime was probably working now.
“You probably...sent a letter bomb again, didn’t you? You want this to end like Heiji’s case” Oikawa assumed quietly, facing his enemy again.
As Oikawa deducted correctly, Mori lifted his chin, looking over.
"Yes, and no. I changed my plans a bit."
"What do you mean?"
"Since our dear officer Nakamura just handed the delicate delivering to the forensic team himself - my bad, whoever got hitten by it - I had to get rid of your recent partner in another way. Maybe I was a bit reckless about it," he grinned, looking all so emotionally affected just for show.
"I went for something else. Much more thrilling" Mori looked at his wrist watch, "Well...I think it should have arrived by now."
Turning on his heels, he walked towards the door that led to the staircase.
"My dear detective, as I said, I've found a much more humiliating way to destroy you. You never fail to satisfy my curiosity. And I'm really interested in the limits of human principles. So...I cannot wait to see what you will do, if I really destroy someone dear to you. If I destroy Iwaizumi Hajime. Excuse my audacity, but it was more than visible that you may have liked the fact of being admired and loved in a honest way by that Nakamura, but you never loved him back. Now it's different, isn't it?" Mori chuckled once more.
"We will meet each other soon, my dear detective. Please enjoy watching from the front row, now."
“I won’t fail, and you’ll be so shocked the day I’ll destroy you, you won’t even expect that!” Oikawa gritted his teeth, "So this is what you really want? Destroying me? Why don’t you challenge me by yourself? Too afraid of losing? I didn’t expect you to be such a coward!"
Mori stopped, as Oikawa talked back. He laughed at him, at his naiveness.
At least it seemed to be like that for Oikawa.
"You know...I could have killed you a lot of times. There were so many chances, but...it's rare to meet someone with such a brillant mind. Someone who actually got brain and knows how to work. It's just the most interesting show I've ever seen in my life! That's quite a compliment, Oikawa-san. But yes, destroying you...that's something which crossed my mind. I just can't right now. I haven't seen you at your best yet."
"Then" Oikawa inhaled, seeing a light sparkle of hope in saving his Hajime, “If I kill myself, you won’t ever be able to entertain yourself. So stop hiding behind other innocent's lives!”
Mori threw his head over his shoulder.
"Oh...who's the coward now? Did I hit a nerve? When you were almost gone for a year, I had the slightest fear that you would've committed suicide. The game plan is simple: you just need to catch me red-handed. But even if I won't be there after, do you think my network will be crushed down? You act so big, but yet you know so little."
He shook his head in clear disappointment.
"You don't know how the high society works. I can't blame you for that. You've never been a part of it, right?"
Oikawa lowered his gaze for a moment, remembering where he came from: his parents abandoned him when he was born, leaving him in an orphanage, all alone. He had to grow up alone. He had never experienced love by someone. Nobody who had truly wanted him.
Yeah, he definitely didn't know how high society worked. But he knew he hated it. The arrogance. People looking down on you. Everything.
"Believe me Oikawa, your death won't stop me. Moreover..." and as if he had timed it, Oikawa's cellphone started vibrating in his pocket, "Guess, someone still needs you. Good luck, detective. Sometimes, a proper private talk is necessary, don't you think so? Take care."
*
Hajime had finished the call and sat on his desktop table now, still looking at his ring.
Just a few seconds later, Kuroo came by, waiting outside of course and wearing a mask and a protective jumper. His expression was shocked, as he - or anyone other - wouldn't have guessed that history were about to repeat itself so quickly.
"I called the isolation ward, they will take care of you in some minutes," he tried to sound calm, but actually his voice was trembling.
"What...is with Akane?" Hajime wanted to know, sounding a bit hollow there.
"She'll get tested soon. But she said she hadn't had contact with anything of the inside."
"The envelope itself is safe" Hajime nodded, all serious.
And then there was another question that the chemist really wanted to get the answer, as it was the most obvious one to ask.
"Iwaizumi...how...?!"
"We were out for some minutes. Guess, someone has smuggled that stuff in" the forensic doctor cut in fast, "Knowing that she was about going to the outbox."
"Are you...alright?" Kuroo's eyes showed concern.
They all had this before and now...Hajime seemed to be off. He looked a bit paler than he usually was. No surprise, being attacked with an unknown biochemical weapon. Not knowing what it actually contained...
"Think so. I'm just glad that it didn't happen to anyone else."
"Iwa-"
"Maybe it's just the same like back then. The other analysis showed this" he cut off the chemist, "So...I have to suffer from some symptoms like Yui had. In 14 days I should be okay."
At least he hoped so.
Sending Kuroo back, because they shouldn't risk more, Hajime had to wait a while longer, and was finally visited by the isolation staff.
They put him into isolation clothes too, getting him safely to the ward.
That would be a long day of examinations...
First, getting into decontamination as good as possible. Then having blood sampling, smear tests and anamnesis.
Getting into some two-parter scrubs and having all his personal items removed first.
What he didn't want to hand in though, was his cellphone and the ring. Definitely not.
So they had to promise him to give the device back after examining messages and everything else - looking for some hacking incidents.
*
Tooru ran towards the hospital, as he hadn't got time to waste. Mori told him clearly enough where he had aimed at - who he had aimed at - but if his words were to believe, it wasn't a normal letter bomb he had sent this time.
When the detective arrived, panting, some police cars were parked outside, the blue sirens were still blinking in the daylight, and people could neither enter nor exit the hospital.
No exceptions. A yellow-black striped barrier tape was the visible border, that wasn't allowed to be crossed.
But Tooru wouldn't have been Tooru, if he had kept away. Therefore, he went straight to the tape, bending down and crossing it boldly. He wanted to go to the entrance, to make his way through as he usually did, but he was stopped by a well-known voice.
“Bold of you to come here after what you did.”
Tooru turned around, facing the blonde detective, Osamu's twin brother.
“After I did what? I don’t have time for your stupid games, Miya!” Tooru snapped back, but Atsumu stopped him again as he wanted to try once more to enter, now grabbing him by the sleeve of his beige coat.
His eyes crossed the other detective with a dark glare.
“Sorry, but your fingerprints don’t lie."
My...fingerprints?!
Tooru smirked and laughed out loud for a moment. Miya was serious.
"I arrest you for committing a biological attack, using illegal biological substances and I accuse you of being suspected of producing them beforehand. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.”
The standard phrase, but he had already the shackles in his hands ready, turning the irritated Tooru with one swing around - arms on his back - as the sound of snapping metal was to be heard.
“You sure are doing your job really well, Atsumu, but with the wrong person!” Oikawa gritted his teeth.
“Hey! What are you doing?!” a sudden voice came up loud and strong.
The brunette detective turned his head over his shoulder, looking at a shocked Kuroo Tetsurou, who was pushed back by an officer because he had tried to get out of the building.
"He’s the wrong one!" the chemist could only shout, "Damn it, Miya! Don’t fall for that stupid trap!” Kuroo's amber coloured eyes darted at Tooru now, still struggling with the officer, “Someone smuggled a letter bomb inside!” he yelled, “Iwaizumi is in the isolation ward, right now! He was the one exposed to it!”
“Hajime...?!” it was a mere whisper taht left Japan's greatest detective's mouth and he went white, eyes wide.
Although being handcuffed, he tackled Atsumu by the side, fred himself so he could run towards Kuroo. Even two policemen who wanted to stop him, were hit by his shoulder or kicked into the poplit.
“Oikawa!” another voice stopped him.
Thank God! He would help him!
“Daichi...Daichi I need to see him!” Oikawa almost pleaded, looking at his former colleague and still nowadays friend, who didn't seem to be in such a good mood right now. His facial expression was stern, his body tensed.
“I can’t do anything, Oikawa. Don’t make things harder.”
Tooru couldn't believe his ears. He shouldn't make things harder? Out of all people?
But wait...he blinked and...yeah. Although, Daichi was strict in his words, there was a little kind sparkle in his eyes.
The sign, that there was still hope. Not now, as he was seriously in trouble, but...there was.
Tooru turned to Kuroo.
“Kuroo! Please...please look after him!” Tooru requested, as Miya got his composure together again and walked up fastly.
“I will!” Kuroo promised with pursed lips, “I’ll contact you as soon as I have news! And I’ll make sure to send you the best lawyer we have!”
Atsumu only clicked his tongue about that comment and pulled Tooru suddenly harshly around again.
“Attacking police officers won’t help you. In here, now!” the car had been already open and so he pushed the detective forward, until he could push him by his head inside.
Bringing him into investigative custody would mean some days of waiting, until progression would take place.
It definitely needed even some more time until they would go to the court of law.
But for Miya it didn't matter. He would finally get his penalty.
Kuroo exchanged looks with Daichi as the detective slammed the car door and walked over to the other side, driver's seat.
Of course he wanted to take Oikawa by himself to custody.
“We all know that this can’t be true...and I’m pretty sure who’s behind that.”
But whether it was totally unfair and obvious or not, he had to make the call to the lawyer's office.
Kuroo knew that Tooru wouldn't like his choice, but there was only one man who could help him.
*
Atsumu didn't talk when he was driving the car. He also didn't throw a look into the driver's mirror, just kept his eyes straight on the road.
Tooru, sitting on the backseat, observed the other, but his eyes didn't even twitch. Nothing - absolutely nothing - was to be read out of his eyes.
Not even satisfaction.
They came to a hold at the police department's parking lot and went straight to the examination room. It was just about that, when Tooru couldn't hold it any longer:
“You're really as dumb as I thought” Oikawa commented, referring to Atsumu.
And still it was just a distraction from the real stuff that worried him. Hajime’s health.
It was devouring him, not knowing how he was doing. If it was serious or not.
He knew nothing.
"You better keep your mouth shut. Don’t get yourself accused of insulting a detective too" Atsumu gave him a nasty look, "And if there's the slightest chance to see you in jail, I’ll gladly take it.”
As I won’t let you murder Hajime-kun like you did with Heiji...
Of course Atsumu had himself to get prepared for the examination.
But since he knew that Oikawa wasn't dumb, he would wait for the action. The chemist already said so...they had to wait for the lawyer who would defend that jerk.
And so they let wait the accused detective for about two hours.
Two long hours of doing nothing, just sitting still with cuffed hands in the interrogation room. Hard and dazzling white light flooded the room with the mirror.
Tooru knew that they could see him from behind, that everything he did was recorded on tape. He looked around, then just stared at the table's surface in front of him.
Then the door opened. The brunette looked up and frowned as he recognised the attorney, who stepped in, wearing his best suit.
The best attorney for criminal law, his good old acquaintance, Ushijima Wakatoshi.
The well worn briefcase was the only thing that didn't fit to his perfect appearance and it made Tooru smile in amusement.
Ushijima bowed slightly, greeting him with a formal attitude, before sitting down next to him and getting straight to the point.
“Kuroo-san told me about the circumstances. I'm sorry that it took so long, but I had to request evidence inspection at the police. Still, I need you to agree to my service.”
I’ll make sure to send you the best lawyer we have...really, Kuroo?!
“Oh no...no, no, no, I’m not going to have you as my lawyer!” Oikawa exclaimed all in a sudden, totally disgusted, “I’ll kill Kuroo for this! I'd rather end up in jail than talking to you!”
“Well, it’s your decision" Ushijima lifted his eyebrows, not even slightly responding to that insult, "Regarding the fact that they have your fingerprints on the envelope and the fact that Miya-san want to see you dead by himself, I’m not sure you have many options.”
Taking the briefcase on the table, he opened it and took out a few documents. Turning them around in the right direction, he put the expensive pen next to them, right in front of Tooru.
“Also it seems inappropriate for me to say that to you, but Kuroo-san told me that you should rather think of your cohabitant. Congratulations to that, is to be said.”
Giving a scruff, Tooru glanced to the side, then at the document and hesitantely took the pen. His signature was slim, but not trembling. He finished the last stroke with a heavy line and sighed.
“It'll be better for you to get me out of here as soon as possible. I need to see Hajime” Tooru talked to him now for the first time without any mocking or anger in his voice.
"Yeah, is that so? Don't you see what you've already done? Wanna kill another person so badly?" the door had been opened again and now Miya was entering the room with Daichi by his side, who just gave a quiet and scolding "Miya", but of course the other didn't want to hear about it.
Ushijima took the document and stored it into his briefcase again, well aware of the other two men.
“Please, don’t mix past events with the relevant present, detective Miya” he stated in his usual calm voice, “I’d like to make this as professional as possible. I’m sure we all want to have justice take place and therefore, find the true culprit.”
They sat down and for a moment it became quiet, until Daichi started the official recording, and so with the announcement of the people in the room and their states.
And then he gave room for the first talk: the crime Oikawa was accused of.
“So finding your fingerprints on the envelope clearly marks you as a culprit. Therefore, we’d like to hear what you have done between two and two fifteen in the afternoon today. Moreover, where you've been the last days. Witnesses. Everything.”
Daichi spoke and hoped Oikawa would at least cooperate even if Miya was in the room.
Fortunately, there wasn't much silence and Tooru indeed gave him an easy reply.
“I had an appointment at 2 pm today and it wasn’t at the hospital” their suspect said, relieved to have an alibi.
But that meant...
“Any witness?” Daichi asked. It was his job after all.
Tooru kept quiet at first, not sure how to talk about his meeting with Mori.
“You know it” he looked up to Daichi, “You know who I had an appointment with.”
That caused trouble. Ushijima looked at Daichi and the police officer exhaled noisily.
Yeah...that was right.
“You do?” Atsumu asked, confused, “So what is this mysterious little chat between you two about?”
“It's Mori" Daichi stated without averting his eyes from Tooru, "Oikawa was invited by Mori to meet him.”
Atsumu’s eyes widened.
“Are you joking?! Any proof of that?! Why would you go there all alone without anything or anyone for your own protection?!”
That was impossible. Because...if this was true, why would Mori let him live? He could have killed him so easily!
No way this was true at all!
“Because if I brought the police with me, he would have been up to something else. Or anyone else. And I was prepared to...die, somehow. But he had other plans” Tooru explained quietly, quickly adding the last sentence.
“Just for my notes...we talk about the serial killer Mori, who had been involved in the events four years ago?” Daichi confirmed and Ushijima wrote this down in his notes.
“What was this meeting about?!”
“None of your business, Miya” Tooru replied bitterly, sticking even his tongue out, “Well, since I have an alibi and I couldn’t have done that, can you please let me go? I have to see Hajime!”
And that was it with his patience. Oikawa yelled, almost jumped up. Yes, not knowing how his beloved one was, was frustrating. It scared him.
“I’m sorry to say that...but even if you haven’t been there, we can’t deny the fact that your fingerprints are on the paper. You know better than anyone that it’s possible to smuggle it in by someone else, and still being a culprit. As long as we can’t-"
“My client can’t be hold in custody, if you can’t deliver more proofs. 24 hours or else I have to request for my client to be discharged” Ushijima was already up to the facts and firmly presented it to Daichi.
The police officer pursed his lips. He didn't want to be the enemy there, but it was his job to ask those questions. He wanted to keep an eye on Tooru, even if he himself didn't believe that it was him. Of course not. But without evidences the one way or the other...
“So whether it’s none of my business or not...this is what I have to decide” Atsumu gave Tooru a cynical smile and looked at the attorney now, “If your client would politely answer my question: why the hell have you met with him and what was it about?!”
“Miya-san, please calm down” Daichi told him, but Atsumu only gave him a short laughter.
“I’m more than calm. But if that little meet-up is an hindrance for our investigations, I can easily find another reason to hold him here in custody! Don't worry.”
“Mori is playing with you! Don't you see what’s going on?!” Oikawa barked back.
No. Don't yell. It isn't helpful.
He then tried to calm down, closed his eyes for a moment and inhaled deeply.
“Mori...changed his plans. He’s going serious this time. He obviously wants to destroy me, but...he is aiming for Hajime instead. Because...if he kills him..." interrupting himself, Tooru shook his head lightly, snapping back from his thoughts to reality, "He’ll kill him, if I'm not there to protect him!” the desperation was to be heard in his voice.
“Daichi, please...please...I need to see him...I need to talk to him...please...”
Tooru had never felt that weak before. He wanted to be by Hajime’s side so badly, but everything was keeping him away from his forensic doctor.
In all this life, Oikawa hadn't loved anyone before, and nobody had loved Tooru like that. Yes, there had been Heiji, but Hajime was the one he truly missed in all his life. He could reciprocate his feelings. He had nobody and now...there was Hajime. There was someone to look forward to see, to protect, to love.
Silence entered the room.
“I think...that clearly left space for more examinations, and also you can’t deny the fact that Mori, already causing two murders recently and being the one responsible for the events four years ago and many other crimes, can be a suggested culprit too. It isn't only my client” Ushijima closed the whole interrogation, “Furthermore, I noticed that officer Sawamura had knowledge about that meeting. So...anything else, Sawamura-san?”
Daichi seemed to struggle, but seeing Oikawa like that...
Yeah, he had made mistakes in the past but...he didn't hold a grudge against Tooru. And so he exhaled, giving up.
“Iwaizumi-san and I...we went to the riverside on his request. I think I agree with Oikawa here, that everything was planned from the very beginning. The traces of the previous murders lead to the building where...Nakamura-kun had died.”
Atsumu looked up, totally shocked.
“What are you...?!”
“I’m sorry, but I promised him to keep quiet" Daichi smiled apologetically, "Still, I told Iwaizumi not to dig too much into that case. And I don’t think that was the cause of...what happened.”
Looking at Tooru now with the same apologetic expression, he continued, "End of interrogation, 5.16 pm” he stopped the recording.
Ushijima glanced at Miya.
“At a word, detective?”
The detective gave him a sceptical look, but he couldn't decline that request and so they both stood up and went out for five minutes.
Daichi watched them, but then leaned in to Tooru, putting a hand on his shoulder.
“You can’t go to him. He and Yamamoto-san were sent to the isolation ward and we have to wait until-"
Interrupted by his phone all of a sudden, he blinked, looking at the display as he took it out of his pocket and gave Tooru a sign, that it was about...
Picking up, there was a short talk, some “Oh” and “Yes” and then he hung up again. Looking at the arrested detective, his lips formed the words that caused Tooru's head to go dizzy. That his nightmare became true.
“Yamamoto-san is okay...she is discharged, Kuroo just told me. But they...had to keep Iwaizumi in there. He got contaminated."
"Contaminated by what?" Tooru asked in a hoarse voice.
"Anthrax...he’s already under medical treatment.”
“Why...didn’t you tell me that?!" Tooru blurted, his eyes full of rage and worry, "You knew where this was leading to! And you still helped Hajime with his investigation?!”
No, calm down. It was for the better. Calm down.
He couldn't help Hajime when he was so furious.
When he was there.
But his grip on his pants got tighter.
“What...” Tooru exhaled, “What have I done?!” his vision blurred. Tears began to build up and ran over his cheeks.
“I did the same mistake again...I dragged him into this...he’s like that because of me! It’s my fault! Why am I so...I’m killing him...”
Breaking down, he couldn't avoid the sobbing now, nor his shoulders from shaking. Or his heart from clenching.
“Because you did ask me the same..." Daichi explained with a calming tone, "And Iwaizumi would have reacted in the same way you have now...you’re so much alike if it comes to your work, that it’s hard for another person to get in terms with it...”
“No, no! I knew I shouldn't got too attached to him! I knew it! Every person who got too close, died...died because of me...and I can't do anything...! Why am I such a monster...? It should be me, not him!”
Daichi's grip on Tooru's shoulder tightened, as he couldn't bear with him like that anymore, not if Iwaizumi was still alive.
“Get yourself together now, Oikawa!” he spoke very strictly now, like he had been as his superior first, and then as a colleague on eye-level from time to time, in the old days.
“Iwaizumi knew exactly what could happen. He knew that, and still he wanted to work with you, because he doesn't want to see you die, okay? Just like you"
Calling him by his name, making him look at him, he tried to keep up the eye-contact, showing all the sincerity he held. Daichi could say whatever he wanted...he visibly saw the dark hole that formed around Tooru. How he let himself be dragged down.
“Tooru...listen to me. I’m not your lawyer, but Ushijima is right. We can’t hold you, if things are like that. And Ushijima himself is a good lawyer, the best. So trust him. And I'll make sure you can at least talk to Iwaizumi. He has his phone with him. Visiting is not possible, but that...should work.”
The brunette clapped his hand over the one with the ring on it. Touching it lightly and staring at it.
Hajime...I’m so sorry...
“Please...I really...need to talk to him now...”
“Okay. Come with me.”
Standing up, the officer dragged the detective with him.
They left the room and crossed paths with the other two, who were still discussing that Ushijima will not allow Atsumu to continue the interrogation. That he would request another detective, as he was too much involved in the cases and his personal issues with Oikawa.
“Hey, where are you going?” Atsumu asked and the lawyer seemed also pretty confused.
“Making a call with Iwaizumi” Daichi just stated.
“You can’t just-"
“Miya-san, be human now. Iwaizumi is in a serious condition and we won’t get anywhere from here, anyway.”
That made Atsumu shut his mouth, but still he clenched his fists. Hissing, he couldn't speak up tot that.
There wasn't a way they could continue with the interrogation. Not with the minor evidences they had.
Daichi led Tooru straightforwardly to his office. Closing the door behind them, he took his private phone and looked for the forensic doctor's number.
As he found it in the contact list, he dialed immediately. As Tooru's phone was still taken by the police, he gave it to him. He opened the shackles - he wasn't allowed to do so, obviously - but he trusted Tooru. And if he could, he would have brought him out by now.
“Kuroo said that he has already his things back, so...” Daichi added quietly as the other side picked up suddenly.
“Daichi-san?!”
Clearly Hajime’s voice.
“H-Hajime...” Oikawa whispered, sobbing a little. Crying again.
“Are you okay? Please...tell me...you’re okay...” his sobs were more audible now, and he didn't even want to hide it.
“T-Tooru?!” Hajime sounded surprised, of course, “Why are you...?! Did you lose your phone or what? Gosh...you have to take care of your stuff!”
His voice was so normal, but...that was only because Tooru couldn't see him at all.
Actually, Hajime sat on the hospital bed, getting some i.v. antibiotics and had his whole parameters been monitored. Heart, breathing, oxygen...everything.
Hearing Tooru crying after he had just recognised his voice, let his own facial expression became stern, but Hajime's voice...he should try to sound composed.
Give a normal impression.
He surely heard the news.
Hajime stayed quiet for a moment.
“I’m okay right now. I don’t feel sick or so. They're giving me antibiotics as a threesome, and I guess I'll have more side-effects from these than from anything else.”
Stop babbling! Don’t talk too much!
Babbling meant he was nervous, and he absolutely didn't want to show, so he repeated simply, more steady: “I’m feeling okay. What about you?"
“I’m at the police station...I’m...” Tooru tried to say it, but he stopped.
Telling Hajime that he got arrested would make him worry, and maybe worsen his condition. That was the last thing he wanted.
“I just came by...telling Daichi about the case and some new details...” Tooru lied halfly, looking at the police officer for a moment, who nodded.
And when some more tears were falling down from his chin, with his already swollen eyes, he paused for a moment before talking again.
"It’s all my fault again, Hajime, you know? Isn’t it funny...that I destroy the lives of the ones that care for me...?” his hands were trembling and the detective was glad that the other couldn't see that. They were so quiet alike.
Hajime listened to him. Somehow it was calming, hearing his voice in that scary situation he was in, but on the other side...he knew that Tooru was worried as hell, right now.
Looking up to the drip stant, he let out a sigh.
"You don't."
Usually he would rage.
"I tell you calmly now, because the nurses would get me a sedative if I’m not, but just imagine I smack your head, okay?”
He lowered his gaze to his hand, wrapped up in some bandage. They also had to give him local treatment on the back of it, as the powder had had contact with his skin.
“It clearly is my fault. I ripped off the envelope of Akane’s hand. I didn’t think it through. Just seeing her with that...I’m an idiot. I was prepared that something would happen, but when it did...I haven't been professional at all.”
His wry smile dropped, “Sorry...that I make you worry so much, Tooru...I’ve wanted to protect you, but therefore I should have protected myself first...”
“You don’t have to protect me. Nobody has to. I should have known that this would happen if I...” Tooru stopped again.
...if I fell in love with you.
“Don’t worry. You’ll be okay, I promise. I’ll end this, once and for all!” Tooru then exclaimed in a way to cheeful voice. Too cheerful for Hajime's liking, who knew exactly that it was put on.
“Tooru...” he began quietly, “Of course I will. As you will protect me. That’s...what a relationship...no...that's what a marriage means. Taking care of each other. That’s normal. Our jobs aren't, but that doesn’t mean we’re not allowed to...fall in love or so."
He ran his hand through his short black hair, leaning back into the pillow, "I said it once and I'll say it twice: I'll never regret that I've fallen in love with you.”
Hajime held the phone closer to his ear, looking at his ring, and smiled weakly.
“So...take care. Whatever you do...I need you. Just take care of yourself and...yeah, I will as best as I can too. Guess, it should be fine in about a week. I'm just being a bit nervous because we had been going through this all before. My team.”
“You’ll overcome this, you’re strong...” Tooru reassured him too.
But what about me? I’m weak without you...
“Hajime, please. Trust me. Whatever I’ll do...it’s for your best” Tooru smiled sadly, closing his eyes for a moment, just remembering Hajime’s features, his smile...even if Hajime wasn't there.
“Stubborn idiot!” Hajime scolded him, “Tell me this once more when I’m out. I..."
...didn’t propose for nothing.
“I do trust you, but don’t you ever forget that I’m with you too...”
The last three hours, Hajime had had time to think and ponder. And even if his head was a mess, he wanted so much to get over this, and wanted to see him again.
There was no way he wouldn't fight for it. For them.
They said goodbye to each other, and after hanging up, Hajime layed back down in bed, looking at his device. At the homescreen which showed him and Tooru.
Although, they had just talked to each other...the forensic doctor opened the messanger app and texted him a short but honest “I love you” to Tooru's own phone.
*
When Daichi got his phone back, he looked at Tooru.
“I can’t tell you about the on-going investigations as long as you’re a suspect. I think that’s clear. But believe me, that I’ll do everything to get you out as soon as possible. And...that I’ll try to hold Miya back. He’s overreacting and grabbing every straw he can. I won’t break rules but I’ll try to...expand them in a legal way.”
The suspected detective nodded, wiping his tears away now.
“If I won’t be able to get out of here...please protect him. I beg you” Tooru whispered, while Daichi put on the shackles again, as they had to leave the office.
When they came back, Ushijima had also returned from his visit at the chief's office and stopped in front of Tooru. They were brought back into the interrogation room, whereas Daichi left them for the private conversation between attorney and client.
“Oikawa, as for now they can still hold you here for 18 more hours, but I’m sure they will have to let you go" he reported all collected, somehow even a bit pleased, "Things can’t be rushed. However, when you're out, I have to advise you not to investigate any further as long as you’re a suspect. But...”
He handed him a bag with his phone, “At least you can get this back.”
Tooru just wanted to reach for it, as Ushijima pulled back for one more important and serious note, making the other almost pouting.
“Be aware that every action of yours will be observed by now. Furthermore...detective Miya won’t be in charge of interrogation due to personal conflicts, but...neither will Sawamura-san.”
Good and bad news. On the other hand it meant that Daichi could deal with Tooru in a more relaxed way now. Maybe help him even better.
Tooru just nodded and while Ushijima was going through some more information, and the brunette was of course listening, the latter also checked his phone.
His eyes widened, as he noticed the message sent from Hajime five minutes ago. After their call.
I love you.
Tooru’s vision began to blur again, and he smiled sadly.
“Can...I leave already?”
Ushijima nodded, although leaving meant that Tooru was lead by another officer to the basement where the jail cell was located. It was a restless day, a restless night, and when the 18 hours had passed, he was actually a free man again. After he had another interrogation with a kind detective, called Sugawara.
He gave Tooru some reassurance, that everything would turn out well for justice, and a small hidden hint that Daichi was a very good friend of his.
So, he was in good hands for now.
Then nothing happened.
Two days passed and there was no sign of Mori.
It nagged him.
Did he really change his pattern?
Tooru had promised Ushijima to stay out of the case, as he wouldn't get any information at all in a legal way anyway, but still he sat together with the morgue team in the room where it happened.
The incident.
It was already clean and decontaminated, but sitting there...was strange.
They talked about possibilities, talked about the incident. Trying to comfort Akane who put the blame on herself, because she hadn't thought of Hajime's warning before.
But what kept them all much more occupied was the forensic doctor's health condition.
Chapter 16: Punch the clock
Summary:
“Sorry, I’m a bit confused...I think...you're someone I actually know?”
“W-what...? You...don’t know who I am?”
“My display says that you're Tooru, right?” Hajime replied all so neutral, “So...I guess we're close?"
Notes:
Happy birthday Iwaizumi Hajime! <3
10.06.2021
I couldn't leave you with nothing on Iwachan's birthday, so here it is!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Hajime himself had only texted his love now and then.
He wanted to stay in contact, but it was just about afternoon that he had the urge to call him.
Although he had been treated immediately by the doctors of the hospital, got into the isolation ward and all...he felt that something was off.
There were moments when he forgot what he was thinking. When he forgot simple stuff like the day's date.
And then he had woken up, already spending two days in this room. It took him a few seconds to recognise, where he was.
Also, the somatic symptoms became more serious: the inhaling spores had affected his lungs and, since yesterday evening, he was on oxygen because he was on 92%. He felt a bit sick, like suffering from a mild cold. But his gut feeling kept telling him that it wasn't the worse. That there was still something to come.
Right after breakfast, blood samples were collcted again, memory testing, and more.
The doctors also adviced him to have an emergency contact.
Hajime was scared.
*
Obviously, Tooru didn't listen to Ushijima's advice. He began investigating again as soon as he was free, out of the police department.
He couldn't keep away. The sooner he would arrest Mori, the better was for everyone.
Especially for Hajime.
And although he wasn't allowed to enter the hospital - people really kept observing him, how ridiculous! - he tried his luck outside of it. He went anywhere his mind took him, following any idea that came up.
Just the second day after the incident, he was interrupted again with his work.
“What are you doing here?”
Tooru rolled his eyes, standing up again as he had bent down, looking for some traces in the soil. Something which could be a new hint on the hospital's ground.
Out of all people...it must be him. Of course.
"Not your business, Miya. I need to find some proofs that will condamn Mori!” he snapped back and put his hands in his coat's pockets.
"Obviously trying to make things worse for ya?“ Atsumu crossed his arms, giving a hiss.
"There hasn’t been any crime commitment since two days. And here you are, digging your nose into it again. Leave it to the pros. I thought your lawyer told you that this isn’t good for your process in court, didn't he?"
Still, Atsumu would never admit that the police was totally tapping in the dark, and that most of the officers had already asked for Oikawa's help. They were so desperate.
He...should actually ask him.
Fuck it.
“The pros? So, you mean...me” Tooru teased, looking at him with a challenging expression.
“Listen here, little pompous detective" Atsumu stepped forward, his frown much deeper and more threatening that the other could remember, but was interrupted just a second after.
"You have so much to learn yet!" Tooru spoke dramatically, "And still you didn’t have the brain to learn from me back then. So fuck off and let me work!”
Atsumu tried to swallow down his anger, but the last sentence snapped something in him.
He grabbed Tooru by the collar of his shirt and clicked his tongue. Not doing anything he first had intended to do, like threatening him. He put his mind in order.
Instead, he just glanced aside.
"Don’t you even think that it’s me who needs you for the investigations...but the team is" Miya spoke quietly then, letting him go, which surprised the detective and let him rearrange the collar in silence, "They want your help. As we don’t make progress and have problems to analyse his mind, reading...what Mori's next steps will be. So...I...should ask you....for support.“
Even giving birth to a child seemed easier at the moment than that request. It made Atsumu sick to ask that jerk who had done nothing but causing trouble to them. Still, he couldn't outnumber the majority of a whole group's decision.
Staying silent for a moment, as he clearly hadn't expected Atsumu to ask him for help, Tooru smirked a bit then.
“Well well, seems that even you acknowledge the fact that I’m the best detective after all.”
Lowering his head, Atsumu didn't talk back to that, but took a step back, turning around.
"I don’t forgive you for the things that you've done, and as soon as I can, I’ll put you in jail. But for the moment...“
Now something else got out, something weak in his eyes, Tooru had only noticed right after Heiji's death.
At the funeral.
"More than that, I want to arrest that fucking criminal who had done this to Hajime."
Talking about the forensic doctor, Atsumu still referred to him by his given name. And he sounded worried. Much more worried than he should for a colleague, friend or a simple crush.
But whereas Tooru still didn't know the truth about his lover's condition, Atsumu did very well. Too well.
That was why he was so worried about him.
The other detective didn't reply. He didn't want to yell at him for that, as he knew how much Miya was caring for Hajime. Even if he wanted them to be something else than friends.
But Hajime loved Tooru and nothing could change that, right?
“I’ll help you” Tooru finally agreed with a serious voice, “But only because we want the same thing.”
Atsumu lowered his hands now, putting them in his jeans's pockets, and glanced over at the other male again. He wasn't able to thank him, so he nodded.
"Then...do you mind coming to the PD? I think we should expose our cards for everyone involved to see” he suggested, and silently noticed the slim wedding band around Oikawa’s ring finger, as he had rearranged his collar and lowered his hands.
So...they really are together like that, uh?
“Yeah, whatever” Oikawa rolled his eyes with a sigh.
It had always been quite irritating to work with Atsumu. Now it was even more. Why?
Was it...some kind of jealousy? But why should he be?
He was the one who was dating Hajime, after all. Not him.
So why should he be jealous?
Or was it...just some concern?
Hajime...
Atsumu didn't feel comfortable either.
For him it was more about having Tooru's back facing him, not knowing what that jerk was up to.
But even if he had slowed down his pace, the other wouldn't have walked next to him.
Somehow, it was understandable.
They arrived in no time, and after Tooru received his visitor ID, registered as such, they went to the elevator.
Waiting there, standing in the cabinet, Atsumu stayed focused on the mirrored reflection of them.
He wasn't in the mood. There was too much on his mind.
He didn't even want to fight with Oikawa.
The artificial light showed that Atsumu hadn't had the best sleeping schedule recently too.
Getting off after the doors had opened, they crossed the corridor and went straight ahead, almost to the end of the floor.
Turning right then, Tooru knew way too well that surrounding. The kitchen to his left in old oak-wood furniture. Even the same poster from back then was on the wall.
The one that told you 'Be part of justice'. 'Be part of the team'. A recruition poster. The same simple chairs, whose origin he had always wondered about.
They were still in the same condition: not polished, not painted.
Tooru was sure, that they were brought from the basement, where a lot of unnecessary old stuff was storaged.
Passing the room, to his right, the toilets with the still upside-down sign of the signet, showing that that was the men's toilet. Funny, that even that hadn't changed over the four years.
Then they entered a meeting room, and the upshowing faces were none of those he would ever forget.
His former squad.
“I guess, I don’t have to introduce you to each other” Atsumu announced as he came in.
A few irritated faces, as they looked up, but most of them seemed kind and even with a relieved smile on their lips, seeing Tooru.
He had to admit that it made him somehow happy. They weren't only relieved because they could finally make some progress, but because they still liked him.
The room was filled with two added moveable whiteboards. A lot of memos had been put there, photos and maps, handwritten notes.
The front desk had even more documents and old archive's files on its surface. On the walls they even started to link the scenarios with red yarn.
That was the special task force.
Finding Mori.
It wasn't the first time that Tooru had seen such effort for an investigation, but the bunch of hints and ideas and everything spoke for itself, that it was much, much bigger than he had ever considered to witness in his whole so-far-career.
“So as you wanted, I asked Oikawa for he-” Atsumu began, but was already shut up by Tooru himself.
"Mori has changed plans. We don’t know how and when he’ll be back, but one of the forensic team's doctors got infected, as you know...” Tooru started, taking the lead, as he was used to when he had worked there, “He is leading us back to the roots. Four years ago. Heiji’s case. But this time-”
“What? This time is different? That’s what you wanted to say?" an officer interrupted him and banged his fist on the table he was sitting at on his swivel chair, "You caused so many problems here, I can't even count them! And still you haven't learned your lesson!” one of the few who weren't so fond of Tooru's visit.
The detective could remember him well. Futakuchi had always been determined and as colleagues they had been on the same wave length, but with Heiji's death...Futakuchi hadn't forgiven him. As Tooru hadn't himself.
“Yeah, he’s right...why do you have to help us? Why do you act like the detective in charge here?” another one said, identified as Shirabu. A short-tempered guy who had always been the best in the training sessions. The fastest and the most skilled one, as he was a strategist.
Tooru clenched his fists, angry, and it wouldn't need much to let his patience snap. Explode because of too much pressure. Too many thoughts and worries that kept spinning on his mind, as he knew that Hajime was hospitalised and had to pray for the best.
Maybe, if he had the same knowledge Atsumu had about the forensic doctor's conditions, Tooru would've yelled at them furiously. Maybe he would've smashed the glass of water on the nearest desk to the ground or on the wall. But he didn't know. And therefore, he was driven close to the edge.
Atsumu gritted his teeth, and he couldn't hide the little satisfaction that Tooru's performance got backfire.
Serves him right.
“Hey, let's listen to him. We don’t make progress anyway, and we should be glad to have someone-“ the youngest and nicest officer named Yamaguchi tried, lifting his hands to make a calming gesture, but he was shut up too.
“Yeah, that someone who made it complicated in the first place?!”
That went totally off-board.
Too much even for Atsumu's liking.
First priority was solving the case. Nothing more.
“I totally understand that you’re against this cooperation! I am too!" Miya stepped in, stepped even in front of Tooru now like a defense. Funny picture for everyone, so they widened their eyes in disbelief.
"But I agree with Yamaguchi here. Let’s hear him out. At least, he seems to have some connection with Mori. More than all of us” turning around, he now spoke to Tooru, “Tell us about the meeting. Tell us all you know and we can offer you the best support in return.”
Tooru wasn't quite sure why Atsumu took his side there, as it was too lame even for him, but he nodded and inhaled to have a brief pause.
“I met him two days ago because he asked me to. I don’t have anything to do with him. Not as his assistant or whatever you accuse me to be."
One or two people hissed on that comment, but Tooru ignored their reaction.
"He wants to destroy me, I’m his target. Even four years ago. Since forever, I think. Because I was always able to stop his crimes. I was his enemy. He actually..." lowering his gaze, he bit his bottom lip for a moment, "He doesn't want to kill me. Not yet. He is...aiming at my beloved ones, and Haji- um, Iwaizumi is one of them. That’s why he killed Heiji four years ago. That’s why he wants to lead us to that outcome again. Playing with me and bringing me down slowly with torture.”
The men in the room didn't say a word now, they didn't interrupt him. It was far too serious and he had absolutely a point there.
More than absolutely. If this was right...
“But I don’t think this is all he'll go for. He’s...planning something else. I don’t know yet, but I have a feeling” Tooru expressed his thoughts now, looking at an invisible spot as his mind was already working on more. Making conclusions, summarizing the hints, trying to find a lack. Something that would help him to find Mori before anything could happen.
“And because you have a feeling we should listen to you? That’s ridiculous, come on!” Futakuchi spoke up again and also stood up from his seat, "You might be right about the rest, but having a feeling doesn't count for proper investigations at all!"
“But yeah, maybe you should listen!" Tooru snapped back, not even trying to be quieter than his opponent, fifteen feet away, "If I'm right - and I think I am! - sn innocent's life will be taken again! Maybe two! Or three! Can you stand up for that?”
Futakuchi pursed his lips. Of course he couldn't. They tried their best to avoid something like to happen again.
The detective in front of Tooru, Atsumu, crossed his arms. He was also not so fond of trusting a feeling.
He wanted evidence, wanted to find proofs for whatever, but something solid...
"Seems...like we don’thave many other options" he finally shrugged and walked over to the pinned map, "We had two murder cases. Thanks to Iwaizumi's little private investigations with Sawamura we knew that the bodies were thrown in this river on purporse. Following it to the building of the events, four years ago. That’s all. The victims weren’t related to each other, but they had dirt under their shoes. So, maybe murdering them was reasonable for Mori."
He looked at the notes, looked at the red yarn and also at the pictures of their victims.
"But my question is: what exactly did you do to bring up a psychopath like him against you?" Atsumu murmured and then looked at Tooru again, "That the events from the past were a game he liked to play - okay. I totally get it. Also, that you're his favourite toy. Of course you are. Highly functioning brains, quite alike.“
Tooru clicked his tongue in disapproval, but Atsumu was right: they didn't have the same motif.
They were on different sides and still he couldn't hide the fact, that he had never met someone like Mori. If he worked for a better purpose, for justice, he would have even made a brillant colleague!
"We worked through everything we had. Every file. Asked former witnesses, still...we just have to wait for his next step?"
"If we can’t predict the next, then it is so" one of the investigators said, "Having no clue where he is...what else can we do?"
Some others nodded. Then one of the friendlier ones asked: "Oikawa, what else can we look for? Is it really about waiting?"
Tooru hummed quietly. He needed to think about it.
That brief meeting with Mori...had there been nothing? Was it just a chit-chat?
No...never.
Suddenly, he heard Shirabu drumming his fingers impatiently on the table.
His eyes widened. That was it!
“There is a clue!” Tooru exclaimed, and everyone’s attention was drawn to him in expectation now, “When I met Mori..."
That psychopath had walked around him in a circle. Three times. Then...there had been that finger tapping against his thighs right at the beginning.
“The circle club 49!”
He shouted and without any other information, just like that, he twirled around to run out of the meeting-room.
The others stared after him, but Atsumu was the only one who tried to catch up after three seconds.
"Oikawa!" he yelled, running after him, passing the wide-open office to his left to make a quick jump to his desk. Getting his jacket and therefore his gun, he was better prepared now, "Shit, wait!"
They almost jumped into the elevator again - at least Atsumu did - before the doors closed.
He noticed Tooru's tensed expression, his whole posture which was so stiffened...
"What...do you expect there? Mori himself? Or the next murder?" Atsumu didn't even ask how Tooru came to that conclusion.
It was better than having nothing, and so he had instinctively followed him. Because even if he wanted to see the brunette in jail, he couldn't deny his skills and how often he had been right.
“I don't know if he'll be there, but...if we don’t hurry, there'll surely be another murder!” Oikawa mumbled and as the pling sounded and the doors opened enough that he could slid through, he rushed out of the PD.
Atsumu followed and after a few meters, Tooru finally made it to explain his conclusion about the location.
“Okay, but what does...” the blonde detective began, not understanding why a tapping should be important for their case.
“That was a code. He was telling me something like Solve my case, Mr Oikawa, Thursday. I didn’t pay attention to it at first, but!” Oikawa didn't get slower while talking.
“Thursday...is today” Atsumu stated, in amazement and in shock, "Little bastard of a psychopath" he gave a wry smile, "So we have a trace now."
Atsumu took his phone, giving Daichi a short call.
Even if they went there immediately, there should be a distant back-up in case that there was more about to happen. As he waited for the officer to pick up, suddenly a second phone vibrated. They stopped for a moment.
Irritated, Atsumu first looked at his, but then...glanced over to Tooru. The brunette detective was taking out his own phone, looking at the display with an expression that showed a little insecurity about taking the call or not. They were about to prevent some murder right now, and so nothing would stop Tooru from that.
Nothing would distract him.
Nothing, or better, no one but one single person.
Atsumu could tell who that was.
Grabbing Tooru by his arm, he got him to look him in his eyes.
"Pick up. In the meantime I talk with Sawamura."
He knew that Hajime was calling...and Tooru had to talk to him by all means.
He really should...
Hesitant at first, but also confused about the seriousness in Atsumu's voice, he nodded slightly and took the call then.
“Hajime...?!” Tooru replied with a little trembling, but maybe also because of the running before.
At that moment, Atsumu's own call was answered and so he talked to Daichi, giving them a little bit of private space.
*
Hajime had himself very hesitatant at first.
After the doctors had told him about his condition, about the prognosis, about everything...
He had thought that he would feel better, knowing what was it that kept him suffering.
He had thought he could come to terms with it, overcome the anxiousness but...
With a long inhale, he had made it finally, calling Tooru.
Hearing his concerned voice, Hajime's heart dropped.
Get a grip.
He tried to sound at ease, even though his voice was hoarse because of all the recent coughing.
It was pretty sore and he needed to drink more, for the moment it had to work.
Come on, body. Work.
"Hey...sorry for the sudden call, probably you’re busy..."
He leaned back on his pillow, closing his eyes. The fever made him feel dizzy too.
“I’m never busy when it comes to you” Tooru replied on the other side, clearly hearing that Hajime wasn't doing well at all, “Hajime...please, how are you? Tell me the truth.”
The forensic doctor smiled weakly, but then let it drop.
"Well...I had felt better..." he only said, suppressing another cough as he had inhaled to deeply.
Feels like my body's giving up - but...he couldn't tell him.
"Tooru...listen, I haven’t given them an emergency contact or anything. You know...if things go worse, I need someone to decide about artificial respiration and everything."
He wiped off some sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand while speaking.
"And somehow also my memory is affected. Guess that’s the fever. So...is it...is it okay for you, if I write down your name? Wait a moment!" he suddenly cracked, putting the phone aside, to get one of the plastic bags, they had given him for coughing secretion, since it was totally infectious.
Looking at what came out of his lungs made Hajime go a bit paler again.
More blood than yesterday.
"S-sorry...really. It feels like a bad flu."
He still wanted to sound calm, but his voice was trembling.
And he didn't even have to see Tooru to know, that his sudden silence meant that he was holding back tears. That they might ran down his cheeks right now. That his vision blurred. A silent crier.
But he wasn't aware that it also hurt Tooru's own heart so much, hearing those words. Because Hajime had so much to endure.
“Sure, Hajime. You don’t even have to ask! But you won’t need that, you’ll...overcome this!” Tooru said, trying to control his voice.
"Yeah...yeah, I will. Of course!" Hajime confirmed, "I...have too much on my desk to stay in here for too long."
Shit, why couldn't he control his own voice?!
“I’m working with Atsumu, you know? We’re cooperating to solve this case!” Tooru changed the subject as he couldn't control his voice either.
"That’s good. Guess, two of you...is better than one?" he wanted to keep this conversation going on. He needed this.
“We're investigating, we have a clue, and if we get this to be done...we can arrest Mori. And finally...well...finally...”
Finally what?
Will Hajime still be there with him?
Will he be there...and they could finally get together? Nothing to separate them anymore?
“I love you...I love you...” Tooru whispered into the phone, like it was a vow. A promise.
Something he could hold on to. Something to keep him going.
“I...love...you, Haji...” Tooru repeated, multiple tears streaming down his face, which the other couldn't see.
But Hajime could imagine it.
So much that he covered his face with his hand because his own tears came up.
The suppressed anxiousness, the fear was coming up, breaking through the surface.
Tooru’s vows, all of them, hearing his name...Hajime pressed his lips together.
He sounded off.
"Hey Tooru..." he started in high-pitched tune, "Actually...actually, I’m fucking scared. I know you wanna cheer me up, but...I’m so fucking scared that I can’t even joke like usual...like...don’t dig your nose too much in other people‘s businesses and so."
The tears fell down his chin.
"It doesn’t mean I won’t fight...I so will. I so awfully will!" Hajime looked at his ring, "I won’t...let the us take away from you and me.“
A little cough filled the air, "I wanna marry you. I want to live with you, I...fuck...I just don’t wanna die!"
Those words...they broke Tooru, definitely. Suppressing his sobs, he didn't want Hajime to think he was weak. He didn't him to worry. To...whatever.
He just didn't want this. He needed to be strong. For Hajime.
Biting his bottom lip, a sob still came over the latter's lips.
"Tooru...I love you...I love you so much..."
“You won’t. You won’t die. You can’t! You’ll be able to live more than 100 years, and I’ll do everything, everything to make this happen!” Tooru's voice started shaking, but he was determined about his words, “I promised you to never leave you alone. And you promised me to marry me. And it’ll be like this, I promise you! Whatever happens...just remember...that I’ll always love you, Hajime!”
Tooru‘s words made the forensic doctor smile a bit. Weak and still combined with his own sobbing, but he felt all the love, the warmth...he remembered the sweet time they had together, the sudden proposal, the sudden yes...that night full of love.
"I know you do..." he managed to say, hearing Tooru's sobbing that broke his heart so much, "I...can’t forget that. Everything...I'll never forget that..."
Staying silent for a moment, Hajime tried to find his composure again.
"Sorry...to lean on you, even if you already had so much on your mind. I just...I needed to hear you voice."
Inhaling, he felt the pain hitting his lungs, his heart, "I hang up now, okay?"
He didn't want to.
"Take care...whatever you two are doing. Take care and...call me when you can. You know, isolation is boring."
Finally a little joke.
“I’ll be sure to annoy you 24/7. This case...I want to put an end on it. It was all about Heiji, but now...now it’s all about you.”
And Hajime felt it. He cracked a little smile, but he couldn't keep up with the talk.
"I love you, Tooru...always."
Then hanging up...Hajime still held his phone as he felt how his chest tightened.
Breathing was becoming more difficult. Was it a panic attack?
He reached for the emergency button with shaky fingers, pushing it multiple times.
His monitoring went all of a sudden strange and he got another coughing attack.
Day three.
He had to make it to day six.
Then the worst lethality rate was beaten.
His lungs looked so bad on the X-rays, his lung capacity was a mess, and the fever was too high, even with antibiotics and everything.
Hajime was bearing every treatment, every examination. No complain.
His only thoughts were about Tooru.
About them.
Seeing his smile, seeing his loving eyes...all about him...
That idiot of a detective...that idiot he loved so much...
He couldn't die.
Not yet.
In the end they managed to get him stable again, but his body was so exhausted that he fell into a deep sleep.
*
Atsumu had hung up just a little earlier, and so he was an unwanted witness of the call.
Even if he held his grudge against Oikawa...he felt a little of compassion for him.
Hajime‘s condition was bad enough, that they didn't know if he would make it. Of course, Atsumu hoped so, but it wasn't predictable.
So after the brunette was able to catch his breath, to speak without a trembling voice and everything, they rushed forward again.
Atsumu told him, that he had made plans with Daichi. That the police officer would be there with the special squad to give them back-up.
Still, they would need some time to get there and so they had to go in first.
"What’s your plan? Entering and announcing to put their hands up?" Atsumu asked then, as they were close to the club.
“Of course not, geez, I have to teach you everything!” Tooru rolled his eyes in his usual manner, “We’ll go to the third floor. See what happens, then...”
He made a sign of a gun shot.
Atsumu looked at him, all baffled.
"You don’t have to teach me how to infiltrate but...that’s pretty suicidal for my liking."
Standing in front of the club door now, which looked all unoccupied, the detective swallowed. He wasn't one to be afraid of anything too easily, but rushing in an enemy's territory was nothing he liked. Actually, he avoided it, rather planned with a proper back-up and if it was for him, he would have just waited a few more minutes, until their support would get there.
However, it meant that Oikawa would jump in right away and even if he couldn't care less, he didn't want that jerk to be dead by any means.
First, Hajime wouldn't have forgiven him for that. Second, he wanted to see him go to jail. That was a better punishment than his death.
So Atsumu only had the option to go with him, unfortunately. He wasn't to be stopped anyway.
Tooru pushed the door carefully open, it wasn't locked.
Although the club opened officially in the evening, a few customers were inside. Atsumu guessed that those were the regular guests, coming by whenever they wanted to. One staff member was cleaning the floor with a swab in a corner at the back. The lights were dimmed as there was still sunlight coming from the small windows on the door front.
The furniture was classical, leather couches and marble like tables, organised in rows. A long and well-lit bar on the side. Above them some old-school chandeliers, but with bulbs. It wasn't a student club, more like an exquisite one, only for the richest and best men in town. The typical kind of club, Mori would like.
Extraordinary.
The guests didn't pay attention to the two men entering the building now.
Atsumu looked cautiously from left to right. No suspicious person or activity so far.
Of course, Tooru was also on guard, but he didn't show it much. Instead he let his sassy mouth play, while he headed directly to the stairs, a few metres ahead, giving the impression that he was all familiar with the club, putting on the act of being a regular guest himself.
“You’re pretty picky, don’t you think?!” he just replied to the other detective behind him, walking upstairs now.
And only by reaching the tread, someone came to them quickly.
Atsumu's hand flew to the hidden gun weapon under his jacket, ready to pull it, if necessary. But he almost relaxed when he noticed the man's expression: scared.
Totally scared. Like...he was about to die?
He was about their age, a bit smaller than them, maybe Hajime's height. He had dark short hair, more neatly than the forensic doctor's, and also his facial features were less rigid. He wore a business suit, so maybe he stopped by from work or had stayed there the whole night, Atsumu couldn't tell.
“Oikawa-san?” the stranger asked with a trembling voice.
“Yes...and you are?” Tooru knitted his eyebrows in confusion.
He had clearly expected something else, someone else. Not a scared-to-death man talking to him.
The guy held out his palm now, no answer and presented it the detective. His skin was totally irritated, maybe due to some kind of...infection? Red and swollen. Multiple pustules.
“Anthrax?” Atsumu suggested quietly, dragging Tooru a few steps back to him, building up a safe space between them, if his thought turned out to be right.
“T-This...is what will happen, if you won’t stop” the guy declared, almost recited those words, “Please...please help me!" he suddenly cried out, and tried to reach out for the detective with his bare hands.
"Stay back!" Atsumu's voice sounded harshly and he pulled the other in front him back more.
"I don’t wanna die!”
"I said stay back!"
He was about pulling his gun to keep the stranger at bay, but right when Atsumu did so, the man suddenly stopped and started coughing.
He choked on his saliva, tumbling backwards and then just fell to the floor, dead in an instant. No single move. No breath. Nothing.
Pure silence filled the air around them and Atsumu and Tooru stared at the now dead guy in shock.
What...was that?!
Yes, Mori wanted to send him a message. Warn him. And that poor guy was a helpful object for Mori.
Something inside Tooru snapped, and he clenched his hands to fists.
The resemblance of look. The eczema of his hand.
A copy of Hajime.
Mori showed him what would happen to him, if Tooru didn't stop.
I don’t want to die...
Atsumu swallowed, but didn't release his hand from his gun. Just in case. They had been too loud.
"Oikawa" he called out to the brunette as he noticed how absent-minded Tooru was, "Hey, Oikawa" he grabbed him by the shoulder, "Let the squad handle this! This gets too big!"
And even he couldn't hide all of his anxiety. He had been through a lot in his few years as a detective. Had received death threats, had been almost killed once. Had overcome more or less the loss of his best friend back then. But this...it was too much.
The unclear outcome was one thing to handle, but the fact that someone was about losing his life again - Hajime - Atsumu couldn't deal with that. And he knew exactly that if a police officer was involved personally into investigations, he had to withdraw from a case. Even if he was more capable than the rest and therefore, it sucked.
He had to withdraw. And this was the best moment to do so. And maybe the last chance they had.
But as much as he tried to get through Tooru, the latter was already on working-mode. Already anaylsing everything in front and around him.
He shut himself off every distraction that laid ahead. O
f course it was also because he remembered Heiji obviously now. The moment of his death. His last breath. How his eyes had locked with Tooru's. How he fell down on that roof. How he had stared blankly at the sky, his life already gone.
But then, another image filled his mind. And now it was Hajime laying in front of him, dead.
“Hajime...” Tooru only whispered, and didn't even get it, that he was dragged down the stairs by the other man next to him. He wasn't able to pay attention, he totally was in a daze.
Atsumu hadn't waited for an answer that might never come: as fast as possible, he grabbed Oikawa by the sleeve and tugged him with him. Downstairs, out of the building, followed by gazes of the staff and some guests.
Immediately calling Daichi, as soon as they had put up some distance to the club, around a corner, he reported that they shouldn't enter the building without protection. That they themselves needed to undergo testing and decontamination again. Maybe another case of biochemical weapon.
It was a mess. The possibility of being infected was really low as they hadn't touched that guy, but still...who knew if the air hadn't been polluted too.
Maybe, Atsumu got paranoic, but the case "Mori" slipped out his hands.
"And...send some psychologist" Atsumu muttered in the phone, while he looked at Tooru with a side-glance, reaching the meeting point with the police they had decided before. He hung up.
The detective next to him still seemed to be in shock and calling out to him once more, Tooru was finally able to lift his head. Looking at Atsumu with a blank expression.
“What did I do...?” he asked him, his voice full of regret, “Am I...the real monster here?” his voice cracked. His whole strong built facade began to crumble.
"Damn it...get yourself together!" Atsumu gritted his teeth, as Tooru fell more and more into his pitchdark hole of reminiscence.
It filled him with anger. Atsumu could have been the man for Hajime. He could have spent time with dating him now. Kissing him. Nothing like worrying about the question if Hajime would make it or not. But...
"Do you want to do everything you can? For Hajime? Then do it! Don't let this psychopath get to you so easily!"
His voice was enraged and he held Tooru close by the collar, so that his breath hit the other's skin.
"Don't you dare give up now or bath in self-pity. You can do this for years once you'll be in jail!"
And it was finally the moment Tooru really listened to him. Getting what Atsumu was about to express. Understanding the anger and pain in those man's eyes.
“I wish...he would have chosen you, you know...” Tooru replied quietly, and lowered his gaze with a faint smile.
“If I hadn’t come back, we wouldn't have met. You would've been dating each other, and Hajime would've been safe...” he continued as he felt his heart shattering into thousand pieces, one by one, and it was so hard to keep it together, somehow.
“I should stay by myself, because I only bring problems to the ones staying by my side...” Tooru whispered to himself, almost inaudible.
Atsumu pursed his lips into a thin line, then he heard Tooru's negativity taking all over. He stayed silent for a moment, so he wouldn't punch him righ into his goddamn face of regret. Although he so wanted, at first.
"You freakin' bastard" he snarled instead, "You know what? Hajime even wore that ring when we had met after work for the first time. And wanna know what our conversation was about? You! As I mentioned how much you piss me off, he was more curious about you than he would ever be about me!"
Atsumu remembered clearly the day he decided to give his all to make Hajime fall in love with him. He remembered that little sparkle in those olive-green eyes whenever Tooru was mentioned.
"And we had a fucking good first date! Really, but then...then he wanted to meet me in the morning, in the morgue. It was the day, I could finally punch your face! And his eyes, his mouth, everything...he was still into you!"
Getting upset and therefore louder again, he still held Tooru close, still not finished to let him go.
"And the most annoying fact is, that he wouldn't have given me any real chance at all, if you hadn't been around before. Because he had absolutely no clue he could ever fall for a guy! And he would never fall for me the same way he did for you!"
"Miya, Oikawa, are you alright?" Daichi's voice suddenly raised next to them, and although the first mentioned heard him, throwing a quick glance at his superior, he hissed, and focused on Tooru again, who had lifted his eyelids in silence. Not believing what Atsumu was telling him.
"So just get your shit together and save your self-pity for later! Hajime needs you and I won't let you take an overdose or anything you had in the past! Take responsibilty for that man who loves you!" and with that he had really hit him in the face with his fist.
"Miya!!"
Atsumu stepped back, lifting his hands. He wouldn't do anything else.
"Oikawa, hey...everything okay?" Daichi came up fast, still keeping some distance because of the possibility they had been contaminated.
Tooru had stumbled back by the punch, but didn't fall to the ground. He swiped off blood from his just healed lip.
It was the same spot as the other days.
“Take responsibility...” he repeated, unable to take a deep breath as his chest still clenched.
“I...” Tooru began, but he simply didn't know how he was feeling. What he should tell Daichi.
“I need to go. Please, I have to finish this. Mori will attack soon again, nothing changed here" Tooru only requested then and received a concerned look by the police officer.
The detective's vision became clear again. It seemed that he was finally back with his consciousness in the present.
Now he also noticed that the special squad was with Daichi. That that one also had his safe vest on, the body protector to gunshots. They were ready to get the whole club busted.
“Wait, you both need to be under examination for-"
“It wasn’t anthrax" Tooru interrupted immdiately and turned around, about leaving, going his own way as he always would, "It wasn’t a mortal infection at all. Just a contact eczema of an allergy on his palm. And I guess he died of venom. There’s no risk. Mori wouldn’t be so reckless to get me killed that easily. As I said, he wants us all alive for now. He needs his playtime.”
Seeing him off again, not knowing what he was about to do, Atsumu could only let Tooru have his way for now.
He was not in the mood to hold him back again and again, and again...
With a sigh, he looked at Daichi, and shrugged. At the moment, he was just relieved that it hadn't been that serious with the dead guy in the club.
Even if Tooru might have been shaken to his core, it wasn't that they couldn't rely on his deductions.
And so, they let the ex-police detective rush off.
*
But for Tooru it wasn't that the would follow a trace or anything. The only path he followed now was the one to the cemetery. He needed that surrounding by now.
The silence.
The knowledge that the dead were watching him.
He needed the silence to be able to talk to Heiji.
As that way was so automatical by now, the path to the large cemetry, having so many police officers and other people, serving the government, serving the nation, being buried there, Tooru was all conscious about it just when he sat down next to the gravestone.
His mind just spaced off, trying to get rid of the uncomfortable experiences he went through. Therefore all the little blackouts.
The fresh winter air got him though. Little shivers were sent through his body, but he didn't care. The cold couldn't bother him right now. Not when everything else seemed to fall apart.
“I don’t want Hajime to join you too, you know” he blurted randomly, after he had remained silent for a while.
“I don’t want it too either” Heiji’s figure replied, now right next to Tooru, looking at his own grave, "He's still too young to die."
“I have to save him...I can’t lose him too...!” Tooru clenched his hands to fists, looking at his ring on his annulary.
“What are you going to do then?” Heiji asked him calmly.
“I’ll end this. And I'm even prepared to die for him, if it means I can save him.”
"Are you sure this is what Hajime wants?"
"No. But...if there's no other way..."
Tooru sat up, suddenly getting to his feet.
"I just can't let this happen. It's enough. Whatever it takes..."
And with that mumbling, he left the cemetry, heading home with large and fast steps. He was even a bit out of breath, flushed cheeks and feeling all warm in his coat whe he arrived at his apartment.
Opening the door, the first thing Tooru noticed while getting in, taking off his shoes and getting into the bedroom...Hajime's smell still lingered there.
The sheets. The blanket. The pillow.
Tooru had laid down on his bed after he had taken off his coat, throwing it simply on the floor in the corridor.
Closing his eyes, finally being able to inhale enough oxygen, his lungs seemed to relax around that warmth.
He needed him.
He needed to have him by his side.
He needed to hear him at least...
Taking the phone out of his pocket, he dialed Hajime's number.
*
The phone was already ringing for the third time, when Hajime was finally able to reach out for it on the night stand next to him.
His muscles trembled as he did so, and it took him a fourth ring to pick up the call that had come in and was shown on the display. It took him a fifth ring to find energy to speak.
Everything had become suddenly so damn exhausting in the last hours.
"Hey...“ Hajime tried to say at least clear and loud enough. It almost caused him another cough.
“Hajime...I’m sorry I call you by now. Have I waken you up? How...are you?” Tooru asked, his own voice between worry and relief, but also filled with something else, Hajime detected as desperation.
But he knew that the last question was such a pain those last days, because they both knew the forensic doctor wasn't okay at all...else he would have said so before.
“No...don’t worry” Hajime replied with some exhaling, “I...sleep enough and I'm happy about every...distraction.”
The word came with too much effort. He knew how weak he might sound.
“The coughing is exhausting” and that was no lie, “Well...tell me more...about you. How are you?”
Soft. He was still able to make his own words sound like that.
“Getting along, you two? Miya and you?”
Yeah...Hajime tried his best. It hurt so damn much, listening to his strained voice, to every uncommon breath which came in between. But Tooru had to do the same: staying strong for him.
“Actually...Atsumu is a great partner to work with...not better than you, though” the detective was able to make a little joke, but inside...better not to tell.
He wanted to yell. To shout. To cry. Everything.
It was difficult to act so normal when everything was not.
“I’m at home now, and you know...everything smells like you, Haji. I...just...miss you so much...”
Damn it. His voice cracked.
He could avoid the sob which wanted to break out too. But not his shaking words.
“Please...please get well soon...I need you...I so need you, Haji...!”
Losing control. Control, he barely had. And Hajime stayed silent.
“Hajime...?” Tooru said after a while, “Are you still there?” he asked concerned, fearing that something had happened.
But it wasn't that Hajime had fainted or anything. He was still there, holding the phone in his hands, absent-minded.
Taking the device from his ear, he looked at the display again.
Atsumu? Who is...Atsumu?! And...who is Tooru? Who is calling me?
The name on the display was a given name.
So they should know each other, right? It was...intimate, right?
“Sorry, I’m a bit confused..." Hajime finally answerd again, but he seemed distant.
Tooru's eyebrows knitted. Why the fuck was he sounding so distant right now?
As if...as if they...
"I think...you're someone I actually know?”
And now it was Tooru, who remained silent for fifteen seconds straight. Not even blinking, his expression sunk. His eyes widened.
Hajime...doesn't remember me?!
“W-what...? You...don’t know who I am?” Tooru whispered in disblief.
He prayed that he had misunderstood. It couldn't be. This couldn't be real.
“My display says that you're Tooru, right?” Hajime replied all so neutral, all so strange, “So...I guess we're close? Excuse me, but my memory lacks a bit, I think. Maybe because...I’m hospitalised, right?”
And as he said so, Hajime looked around. Yeah, it was a hospital room, but so...overly steril? So many machines, the drip stand with three infusions, breathing machinery, and...oh...his body hurt so much!
“Yes...I’m...I’m Tooru Oikawa...I’m your...your colleague” Tooru lied with pursed lips.
The tears were just falling down his chin. He couldn't stop crying now.
Even if the tears ran down mutely, even if he didn't sob...his vision blurred and this time his heart really broke.
Hajime...not remembering him.
Maybe it was better not to tell him the truth. He shouldn't feel guilty for having a lack of memory. His condition was already bad.
Keep yourself together. Just for now.
“Colleague?” Hajime coughed a bit, switched to the loudspeaker and then looked at the display again.
He stayed silent once more...the contact profile picture showed him and a man...kissing. This must be Tooru, right?
If that profile picture was correct...yeah...of course...it was Tooru. Who else?...His beloved Tooru!!!
“Sorry...was I...off again?” Hajime asked almost in a whisper, as if he was unaware of his blackout a minute ago.
“Tooru?! Are you there?!”
On the other side of the call, Hajime could hear a sudden sob.
Shit. I can't keep it...I can't...
Tooru couldn’t believe it. Hajime...at first not remembering him at all. All they had, became simply dust. Then, the next second, Hajime's memory turned back to normal. What the hell was that? How could that be possible?
“Tooru?!” the forensic doctor called again, more concerned and worried now, “Tooru, talk to me! What...what did I say? What is it? Why are you-”
And then he stopped. He got it.
He had forgotten...about...
“Oh god...Tooru...I...I’m sorry...I...” he didn't know what to say. Even laying in bed, his shoulders sunk.
Why...even his mind played tricks on him, now?
And what was worse and so fucking scaring was the fact that he just had lost temporary his memory about him. About them.
Fuck it...
“Tooru...please say something...love...baby...talk to me...” he pleaded in a whisper.
“Are you...are you my Hajime?” Tooru suddenly made himself noticeable again, wanting to know who he was talking to now.
He didn't know anymore. Was it really his beloved Hajime or...the one with all his memories wiped down?
And the question even broke Hajime's heart more. Also the anxiousness in Tooru’s voice.
“Tooru...yes. Yes it’s me! Me, your sometimes too rude Iwa-chan. The man who...wants to marry you...”
God he must be so hurt...and scared...
“Hajime...Haji...I...” Tooru began, but his voice cracked, "Since when...are you lacking memories? Why didn’t you...tell me so?” a few more sobs were to be heard.
He didn't want to blame the other for that, but that had just been such a shock right now.
Hajime swallowed, lowering his gaze.
Why can't I hold you right now?! Be with you...
“I...I don’t know. I just thought it was because of the fever but...it seems it gets worse. I can recall them though...but...” Hajime didn't know what else to say, “They tested my blood already. Waiting for results again. It can't be just from the anthrax spores.”
And Hajime knew that he couldn't promise Tooru not to forget again...it was out of his control.
Everything was out of his control.
How he hated this feeling. It reminded him of his mother. When things went out of control in the past too. The feeling of being helpness. Not able to do anything at all.
How much he made Tooru suffer by now...
I'm sorry, Hajime...you have to bear with me so much. That's not fair.
Funny...his mother said so when she was crying, holding him, a twelve-year-old, in her arms tightly, that he couldn't even breathe. Apologising all over again.
And now...he felt the same.
It wasn't fair. Just because he has acted so recklessly. Because he acted so off-guard, as Daichi said to him.
Just because of this, it wasn't only him receiving punishment, but he also punished the one he was loving so much.
“I’ll come tomorrow. I’ll see you. I want to know everything about your examination results. I’ll help you, Hajime, even if it’s the last thing I do!” Tooru then vowed seriously.
Hajime was right...it couldn't be just anthrax. It must be something else, and he wanted to know.
If there was any way he could help now, it was to focus on this. Contacting Kuroo. Making sure, he was in charge of the analysis. Asking him for help, to get into the hospital.
Hajime’s heart started beating a little bit faster by Tooru's words. Meeting him...right now, he didn't want anything else, as he couldn't fasten his recovery at all.
He didn't know that Tooru had been under suspicion, and that that was also the main reason that he wasn't allowed to enter the hospital. For him, it was clear that Tooru wasn't allowed to visit because of the infection risk.
So with a little smile on his face he then added, “Tooru...if...if there’s another episode like this...if...I seem to have that memory loss again: remind me. Make me remember who I am, who I am with. And if I’m doing anything weird, you’re more than allowed to scold me. But don’t overdo this.”
“I won’t push you, Hajime" Tooru objected weakly, "I don’t want you to stress yourself to remember, if it happens again. You’ll remember after some time anyway, right? So...it’s not your fault, and you don’t have to blame yourself or push yourself that much!”
You’ll feel better, I promise. No one will ever make you feel like this again.
As it is already my fault, that you're here...if I hadn't invited you, if we hadn't had that dinner, if you hadn't fallen in love with me and I had just skipped those feelings inside of me...
“No...I absolutely want you to push me, Tooru!" and for the first time in their call, Hajime's voice was so confident and strong that it made Tooru's lips curl up a bit.
Typical, stubborn, Iwa-chan.
"When I’m losing fragments...pictures, stories, everything brings them back. So I absolutely ask you for it!” he paused for a moment, “Please...you know...gaining back missing puzzle pieces means that I won’t remember the moment what I said or did during that loss. So...don’t hesitate. Especially if it's about you. Make me remember you, Tooru!"
Hajime then smiled weakly.
“Mhm...and can I be demanding right now?”
“Yeah...yeah, sure Iwa-chan."
“When this shit is done...let us have a short trip. You and me. Far away. Or not so far away. It doesn’t matter, as long as it's just us, okay? We have to catch up some days together.”
The happiness.
Tooru smiled tenderly, as if he had Hajime by his side right now, right in front of him.
“It would be...perfect” he replied quietly.
Imagining a trip with his love...if it would be possible though. He was sure Hajime would make it, as he would do everything to keep him alive, but...what about himself? Was he going to keep his promise...?
“It will be perfect, Tooru” Hajime corrected with firmness, and got than more serious, “Promise me, you won’t do anything dangerous if it’s not absolutely necessary. I trust you. And I trust your skills, but just...be a bit more cautious, okay?”
Pausing again, as he, of course, didn't get that promise approved by words, he then made a surprised sound as the door was opened by a doctor now.
“Doctor's coming. I...let’s talk later?!”
Whenever later was...right now, every later frightened him.
But he couldn't hold Tooru on-line the whole time.
“I love you, Tooru.”
“I love you too, Haji...take care.”
And after the call ended, Tooru just inhaled and exhaled for once, as he received a sudden message.
Anonymous number.
>>>
Are you enjoying the pain, dear detective? I know you are. But I’m tired of playing alone.
Let’s end this, either you or me, two days from today. 2 AM.
I’ll be waiting for you, my dear friend.
<<<
Well...at least I'm not the only one who starts to get tired...
Tooru dialed Kuroo’s number.
“Kuroo, I need you to help me. I need to get in the hospital. I have to see Hajime!”
“What?! You’re insane, you know you can’t see him. He’s under isolation!” Kuroo replied all startled by the call, getting it a bit wrong.
“You don’t understand. I need to see him” Tooru emphasised, "Else, no one can guarantee for Hajime's life!"
“...Fine. I got it."
Notes:
Surprise!!
I didn't think I could've make it this fast, but I couldn't hold back myself from reading the chapters again and therefore editing them. Getting intrigued by my own fic is quite lame yeah haha ;P
I hope you enjoy this chapter, we're nearing the end somehow...or not? *smirk*
Stay tuned, we'll personally enjoy Iwachan's birthday admiring the art and fics from other people!
Take care! <3
Chapter 17: The forensic doctor who can't remember
Summary:
"I’m working in the laboratory and I'm specialised on rare drugs and substances. I came...to check on you” Tooru lied.
“You...are? Because...the doctors just visited.”
Hajime looked at him in the eyes, as Tooru gave him a narrowed look, “You...you look familiar to me...”
“Sorry, but my mind is working bad, at least that’s what’s written down here” Hajime added.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
They said, as soon as his body would have recovered, the memory loss would stop too.
It seemed that it wasn't only a side-effect of the anthrax spores, but of another venom added to it.
At least something to look forward to. But...he still had to make it to the critical day six.
Two more to go.
Hajime was laying in his bed and had begun to write memos on his phone.
A whole diary to recapitulate everything that had happened so far...
Meeting Tooru for the first time...their first dinner...looking at the stars...the sudden outburst of emotions...getting home drunk...the party, his real first case working on with Tooru...first sleepover...having another one and...sweet love making....proposing...
Really, he wrote down everything. Fast. As if he feared that the pictures in his mind would vanish in an instant again, losing his memory once more. His finger tips flew over the digital keyboard.
Then he also wrote down a list with names and relations, just in case.
People he knew. Who were important. Looks, characters.
So he would at least recognise them and wouldn't give them much more of a hard time than he would already do.
And finally...Hajime wrote about himself.
Who he was. His name, his age, his occupation, character traits, flaws...
It was exhausting due to the dizziness and the impact the venom had on his brain and therefore his central nervous system. His vision got a bit blurred too and he felt how his fingers started trembling. The phone almost slid out of his hands and he had to get a hard grip around the device.
Hajime wasn't someone who gave up so easily or gave up at all.
Especially not if it was about...about...
He stopped in his typing, staring down on the phone's display, and as the door to his room suddenly opened, his olive-green eyes darted to the left.
They widened a bit in surprise when he saw the visitor who entered the room without knocking or announcing himself beforehand.
Through the isolation cloak and gloves it wasn't noticeable, but Tooru's fingers trembled for the excitement and somehow fear to see Hajime again, finally.
He smiled softly, although it wasn't visible for the other to see, because he also wore a mask for protection.
"Hey..." he greeted the forensic doctor, and tried to suppress his shock, having a look around that room, the machines, the many tubes and the monitoring.
He was also shockedto of see Hajime in such a bad state, his skin so pale yet sweating. His lips cracked, his facial structure somehow slimmer than Tooru remembered them. His spiky hair wasn't that spiky at all, more messy. He had bags under his eyes, dark from insomnia or sleeping enough but not enough for his body to recover.
But what scared Tooru the most...was the expression in Hajime's eyes.
Or better to say: the non-expression at all.
He looked at him, more staring at him and...that was it.
Nothing more.
Tooru's smile dropped.
He wasn't himself.
He wasn't the Hajime he knew.
Tilting his head, the forensic doctor's eyes showed irritation.
“Hey...? Sorry...I think I’ve seen too many people in that isolation clothes?” was his answer with the crack of a smile.
Hajime didn't recognise the person in that protection clothes at all. Not...that he was recognising anything there.
He just felt bad. Pretty bad.
So...he was in hospital?
He looked down on his his phone, still in his hand and the memo app also opened.
The sudden attack of memory loss had hit him again.
“I...yeah, I’m sorry" Tooru then stammered and cleared his throat a bit.
He remembered what Hajime had told him: remind me who you are.
But he couldn't. Although his heart shouted to do so, although he felt that much pain already, talking with his love but knowing that the latter wasn't aware of him at all, he could not. He should have known.
Still, Tooru had hoped - no, almost expected - Hajime to be with him. To remember him, just for that one time he luckily managed to get into the well-protected hospital. Kuroo had helped him so much, having his own foot in the grave because of that, giving him even an IC and all.
Just this once, as it could be the last time he would be able to see the man he loved, before meeting Mori for curtain call.
But Oikawa Tooru had never been lucky since he was born.
"I’m working in the laboratory and I'm specialised on rare drugs and substances. I came...to check on you” Tooru lied, averting the eye-contact now and taking the only chair at the side to sit next to Hajime.
The patient threw him a curious and observing look.
“You...are? Because...the doctors just visited.”
That had been the morning. Not now.
Hajime looked at him in the eyes, as Tooru gave him a narrowed look, knowing exactly that the memory of the doctor's appointment was messed up.
And although the face shield was in the way and everything...
“You...you look familiar to me...” Hajime also lowered his gaze now, noticing the still opened memo-app.
Iwaizumi Hajime, 27 years
Born in Japan, Sendai
Forensic doctor, working for the police in Tokyo
Hospitalised for an infection with anthrax
Causing memory loss!!
“Sorry, but my mind is working bad, at least that’s what’s written down here” Hajime said, turning the device around so the stranger could see it.
While he was doing so, Hajime’s eyes still laid on the other man.
Not only a familiar look but...a feeling.
Why?!
Oikawa looked at the display of the phone Hajime held up.
He read the list of memos, scrolling up without asking. People Hajime knew and even notes about himself.
So...there were also some days when he didn't even remember who he was?
Frightening...
Then Tooru's gaze landed on his own name.
Oikawa Tooru, 27, taller than me, beautiful chocolate hair and eyes, my boyfriend, my love, my to-be-husband, always cheerful, sometimes an idiot, and an excellent detective. Don’t hurt him.
His eyes widened and the next second his vision blurred.
God, Hajime...
Even through the protection clothes, Hajime noticed that the stranger's eyes teared up.
The stranger's lips were pursed.
And...his own heart started hurting.
Badly. So badly.
Was he getting into an heart attack?
"You’re not someone from the staff...“ Hajime just murmured, knitting his eyebrows.
Taking back the phone, reading through the shown part of the list himself.
And then...
That‘s why I’m wearing a ring?!
I’m really engaged?
He would have asked himself how his there written-down boyfriend would look like...but Hajime now was pretty sure he knew.
As he was sitting right in front of him.
"Y-you’re..."
“It doesn’t matter who I am” Tooru interrupted him with a little sad smile, as he managed to calm down a bit now, and also forced his tears back, not letting them fall this time.
He wanted to take the other male's hand, but Hajime retracted his own by instinct.
“S-sorry..." the forensic doctor murmured, irritated by how his body responded and blinked, looking at Tooru with much more concern than before, alarmed.
“I just...wanted to see you one last time, Hajime...to see your smile, even if you’re exhausted. And your beautiful olive-green eyes...” Tooru whispered.
...which are so empty now...
Yeah...right now, he was still a stranger for him. And as Tooru had promised, he didn't push him further. Just acted like that didn't happen at all.
But for Hajime it wasn't okay. It did matter.
Might his memory be at loss, his mind was still sharp.
He could tell by that man’s words. That look.
Nothing was okay. And nothing did not matter.
Everything did.
“You are...Oikawa Tooru...” Hajime almost whispered, speaking up again after coughing lightly with a more confident tone, “B-but...what do you mean? Last time?!”
God, his voice started trembling?
Because if that was his fiancé, he shouldn't talk about last days.
Don’t hurt him...
Tooru kept smiling, not saying anything.
His eyes wandered off, focusing then on the plastic bag full of mucus due to the infection of hajime’s lungs, and...blood. A lot actually.
Looking at that in shock, hit hard that he hadn't known the real seriousness of that damn infection until now, he swallowed down a lump of anxiousness in his throat, pointing with a nod at that.
“Is it...that bad? Since when are you coughing blood?” he asked Hajime in a mere whisper.
At least, the other would tell him the truth, as he didn't know him at all. As he wasn't able to worry for him.
Belittling his condition.
So he is...my fiancé.
Oikawa Tooru. His fiancé. His love.
So why couldn’t he remember him?
His heart could, though. Somehow.
Hajime felt the warmth inside him. Felt the soft tingling of his skin. Everything.
But Tooru had changed the topic. Observing now.
Excellent detective.
“The doctors said...about two days” Hajime tried to recall the talk in the morning, “That’s common. Because of the infection, I mean.”
Maybe it was for the better not remembering, what he had said to Tooru before, on the phone: I don’t want to die.
Right now, he only seemed to think of the symptoms as quite serious, but not life-threatening.
“Well...they also told me what caused the memory problems" he then added, "Wait...it’s on the phone.”
He scrolled a little bit.
“That’s it, a venom which attacks your enzymes, and therefore causing massive nerval reactions...it’s called Nowitschok.”
Oikawa listened to him, concern written all over his face.
Novischok...it was really serious.
It was one of the most powerful venoms known in the world, that bastard of Mori must have ordered it from his Russian acquaintances.
God...he needed to talk to Kuroo as soon as possible, finding a way to cure him. The antibiotics wouldn't be of any help at all.
“Do you feel...anything strange? Something that hurts more than anything?” Tooru asked, needing all the informations he could get to be able to find an effective treatment.
Hajime looked at him, thinking, then shook his head.
“No...just the headache. That’s normal, I guess...it could also be the fever.”
The memos said so too. And that the doctors still had to identify the detailed code of the venom.
“I think they already gave me something” he pointed above, the running infusion. Atropine.
Tooru stared at it.
Yeah, that’s a way, but it needs also athene...and...
Hajime then glanced once more at Tooru for a few seconds, who was lost in his thoughts, recalling his library of knowledge about toxines and antidots.
Then taking all his courage, he initially held out his hand. He didn't say anything. Just that.
The detective looked up in surprise, snapped back to the present, and looked to Hajime.
Getting his attention, Hajime took weakly Tooru's gloved hand in his. It was just a simple gesture, but still the warmth ran through the brunette's whole body.
The love he was now sure Hajime still held for him, although he didn't remember him.
A thin smile cracked up on Hajime's lips. Excellent detective...yeah, he was.
Hajime could tell. Just by looking at him.
“Under other circumstances I’d say take off the gloves because the feeling is pretty ugly” Hajime almost joked and held on tightly, “You know, here...” he pointed with his other hand to his chest, “...it feels that you are the most important person to me. It's only a feeling as I don't have any memory of it. But...these feelings aren’t usually wrong.”
He even chuckled a bit, “Strange to say for someone who should be a forensic doctor and believe in science more than instincts.”
Tooru only watched him, his beautiful smile, his soft voice, the grip on his hand. The chuckle and also the soft expression in his olive-green eyes...
He couldn't help it, as some tears were now falling down his face in silence, under the protection mask.
“That Tooru guy seems to have made you change your beliefs” the detective joked with a little sob, responding to the grip by holding Hajime's hand tightly too.
“I promise you...that you’ll leave this room soon. That you'll be safe, healthy. And won’t have to worry about losing memories anymore until you're 85...”
Tooru said, as the tears didn't stop at all.
Don't hurt him...
It was so present, the feeling of pain, that one rule he had to follow.
Pressing his lips together, suppressing to apologise for making him cry or say something like that Tooru guy truly is amazing, Hajime only nodded.
It wouldn't be good for both of them.
“Yeah...can’t wait for that.”
But the way his thumb was rubbing over Tooru’s gloved hand, trying to calm him down, and how he was looking at him, spoke for itself.
Forwards the message Hajime held in his heart. That it would be okay. That it was just a phase. That he still kept his feelings for Tooru as he should, and that this would never change.
“I...should be going now...” Tooru finally said, retreating his hand and standing up, his gaze low.
He hated giving a pitiful picture, especially in front of Hajime.
“It was nice to meet you again, Hajime...” he just added, looking at him.
He wanted to look once more into those olive-green eyes. Only once more.
Hajime didn't reply at first, but when Tooru was about to leave...looking in his eyes again, he managed to say something.
“I know this sounds strange, but...I hope we meet again. Take care...Tooru.”
And giving his brain the god-damn order not to forget his face again, he couldn't do anything else.
“Thank you for...letting me hold your hand one last time...” with that last little sad smile, Tooru rushed out, leaving Hajime irritated.
Last time?
For him...it wasn't sure if it meant Tooru’s or...his own last time.
Hajime looked at the phone when Tooru was gone, opening the gallery.
Idiot...he should have done right from the start! When the detective was there, he could have asked him, right?
As his memo said he should do so.
Opening the camera roll, Hajime's lips parted slightly, his eyes widening at the pictures shown to him.
Tooru...Tooru...Tooru again.
He saw the photos. Happy ones. Very happy ones.
Tooru looked so happy...an honest smile...on the street. In his own or Tooru's apartment. Intimate scenery.
Clear evidence that he was into a relationship with him.
And still...none of these triggered his memories.
It was frustrating.
Hajime could look at those as long as he wanted to...
Suddenly another coughing attack startled him, letting the phone fall into his lap.
Hajime grabbed the plastic bag quickly, relieving his stressed throat and lungs. He had the iron taste of blood in his mouth.
Looking inside the plastic bag then...
It doesn't really look good for me...
*
Kuroo tried to work on his stuff, but knowing that Tooru was with Hajime, it was hard to concentrate at all.
If he got caught...but on the other side he couldn't have let him down, right?
It was such a fucking situation right now. Whatever it was, even if he went against law, breaking rules...he knew himself too well, that Hajime's condition got more and more worse. He didn't receive the news about the second substance that the forensic doctor was suffering from yet. But calling the ward on a regular base, Kuroo had the alarming curve of Hajime's health condition in mind.
He was so absent-minded and lost in his thoughts, staring down at a paper on his desk he should have written on, that he nearly jumped when his door flung open.
Tooru came in like a sudden hurricane.
“W-what is it?! Is Iwaizumi worse?!” the chemist stammered in shock, his heart pounding heavily against his chest.
It was the first assumption to make, but of course he hoped it wouldn't be true at all.
“N-no, actually...yes, but...we need to hurry, Kuroo!" Tooru nodded, then shook his head, stomping right to him, then stopped and started walking around the room, "We need to make an antidote! We need atropine and athene. And..."
He got some chemical compounds from the shelves, holding them all in his arms.
Kuroo stood up, coming to him, as he already saw the things flying down to the ground which they shouldn't at all - they couldn't need more chemical accidents in there.
"Wait, wait, wait!" he took the stuff out of the detective's hands, placing them on the working table.
"Tell me at least, what you're up to?"
"We don't have time for that! He won't make it, if we don't start now!"
Kuroo couldn't remember a time when he had seen his friend like this. Worried, shaken, almost...out of his mind, a huge knot of thoughts and concerns and helplessness going on inside.
“Oikawa! Tooru! Calm down!"
It wasn't a request, but an order. The chemist got a hold of Tooru's shoulders, forcing him to look him in the eye.
"Tell me what I should do and I’ll make it work, okay? And tell me what happened before you're about blowing up my labratory?” his voice and expression became softer again, as he had a proper look at the other by now.
“Because...you’re looking pretty bad yourself...”
Tooru finally stopped, blinking at Kuroo with his freaking worried eyes.
“His condition is really bad, Kuroo..." he made it, whispering now, as the shock got to his core, "He didn’t remeber me...and he’s spitting blood. He's so exhausted and his body is about giving up, I can see it! If we don’t do something, Novischok will kill him. Hajime will die!"
His shoulders sunk, his head lowered and for the first time, he actually allowed himself to lean on someone else. He never felt so desperate, never begged for something, never worried about someone so much that he couldn't breathe.
"If I don’t try to cure him, I’ll feel useless...doctor's are too slow! Please...help me...Kuroo, I...I don’t want him to die because I screwed up...”
His whole body was trembling now. The chemist felt it, when Tooru leaned with his forehead on his left shoulder. He wasn't sure if the detective noticed it himself.
"No...fucking way..." the chemist exhaled in disbelief about the news, "That...psychopath has..."
Such a chemical weapon?
One of the strongest and not so easy to detect?
It was more than luck, that Hajime was hospitalised there.
If he were anywhere else...he would have probably died already.
It made Kuroo's blood drop to his feet.
"Of course I do" he promised then with a clear voice. He vowed.
Pulling his friend then into a tight hug, "We'll save him. I promise you. We'll save him, okay?"
Rubbing over his back for a short while, he released the other again.
"I won't let your man die. I mean...I want to be on the wedding guest list, you know."
And with a slight smirk, Kuroo then looked at the counter, starting to think through everything.
"I guess they're giving him already atropine, right?" he went for some other substances, taking the tools and everything, "Then we go for the others too. I'll make it as efficient as possible...he's on oxygen already, right? As soon as we're done, I'll bring it to him and inject it myself. But we have to make sure that the vital parameters stay stable. We can't have more complications."
More or less murmuring to himself, Kuroo was already in his full-focused working mode, as Tooru watched him from the sideline, still in need of getting a grip again.
“Thank you...thank you so much...” he sobbed, then wiped his tears off, “Let me help you...” Oikawa said, helping Kuroo taking measurements, the right tools, and stuff.
Kuroo nodded, and the two of them worked as the team they had already been in the past.
There was no need to ask unnnecessary questions, they worked hand in hand. Nothing would have interrupted their focus there.
The air became thick of two skilled minds, of a bit of water steam from the destillations and because of the time ticking in the background.
“Do you think we’ll need to add acetylcholinesterase? I know that producing it artificially may not function at all, but...” Oikawa suddenly suggested, then an idea plopped up his mind.
Without talking, he simply took sterile syringe from a little plastic tray on the shelf and a tourniquet. Wrapping it around his arm, buckling it, he clenched his fist and opened it again. Activating the veins, pumping the blood inside. Then, without hesitation, he inserted the needle with the small tube, sampling his own blood.
Kuroo looked at him in disbelief.
“W-what are you...?!”
Looking at Tooru, sampling his blood...then he got it.
"Of course...” the chemist exhaled, having then the full small tube handed, while Tooru pulled out the needle and took care of himself with a pad, pressing it on the tiny wound.
“I’d kiss your for your brain if I was into guys!” Kuroo smirked and then started to work on the extraction of that last important ingredient for the antidot.
A few more minutes of waiting and impatience.
A few more minutes of hoping that they were right.
A few more minutes of anxiousness.
“That’s it!” Kuroo then finally exclaimed, having the antidote in the little glass jar in his hand.
He glanced at Tooru with a proud and adrenaline driven smile.
“We made it. That’s exactly...what we need!”
With a few movements and tools, he put the antidote into a clean syringe, cupping it and then turned around to the detective, whose shoulders now were able to release in relief a bit.
“I go now. I'll message you as soon as Iwaizumi has received it.”
“Thank you, Kuroo...for everything.” Tooru thanked him again, still thinking that it wasn't enough, and watched him running out of the laboratory.
So...they would be able to cure Hajime.
That was good.
His fingers traced the surface of the desk and his right mouth corner lifted.
At least that was something he had been able to do for him...
Now...he only had one more thing to do.
*
Kuroo went straight to the isolation ward. He was stopped by the caretaker, but shouting that he had exactly what Iwaizumi needed to survice and not to die by tomorrow, they reluctantly let him pass. They still wondered how he could know about that. The information leaked?
Getting into the clothes, Kuroo entered the room, the syringe still in his hand. He was smiling so widely.
“Iwaizumi...how are you doing? Any changes?” he got closer with a calm voice, that confused the forensic doctor even more.
The latter had been reading through some online sources on his phone, taking notes on paper even though he should have resedt for the better...but what should he do?
He couldn't just wait. Putting his fate in others' hands!
The forensic doctor himself noticed of course that the antibiotics didn't work as they should. That the atropine was not enough.
“Just for a moment I wish I’d be a stupid patient with no clue of medicine” he murmured and lifted his head, putting the phone down.
Of course, he was relieved to see some familiar face but...
“Same as ever. Coughing, blood sampling, feverish with 39 degrees and cold limbs. Headache” he then answered Kuroo's question.
By the grumpiness in his voice, the chemist could tell that Hajime didn't suffer from another memory loss attack again. But the patient's eyes asked something else.
“Is it okay for you being here? It seems I’m finally highly attractive for everyone as I got a lot of visits per day...” sarcasm which didn't suit him, but it was easier to deal with the situation.
“Yeah, I asked permission, who do you think am I? I actually follow the rules, dude!” Kuroo joked, hoping to make him feel a little bit better.
Looking at his ring, Hajime glanced to Kuroo.
“No offense, but I guess...Tooru is working, right?”
No further message since the last he had received...
Kuroo lifted his eyebrows. So...that was real, like Oikawa told him. He couldn't remember Tooru's visit.
When Hajime asked him about Oikawa...he didn't know what to say.
“Actually...he was here...” he just admitted, taking the seat next to Hajime.
“Wait?! What?! When?!”
Hajime checked his phone more than once. Tooru hadn't written anything in a note or so but...then he got it.
“So...I forgot. Or better...let him call Mr Jeckyll who took my place...” Hajime tried not to sound too affected, but...it was Tooru. And he has forgotten about him. Again.
Fuck.
How crashing must it had been for his boyfriend?
“Seems the memo didn't help at all. Usually...seeing pictures or seeing the person helps me to regain my memory. So I've already reached the next stage, uh?”
A low sigh escaped his throat. Cynism also didn't suit the forensic doctor.
But the next emotion he felt was upcoming anger.
Anger, as Tooru didn't message him about that.
Anger, about himself.
“He came in the early afternoon" Kuroo solved the puzzle for him, "But hey...don’t stress yourself, it’s not your fault after all!” patting Haijme's shoulder, he looked him in the eyes now, “You...are going to be okay. Where did Iwaizumi Hajime, the best forensic doctor and the strongest man I’ve ever known, go?”
Hajime pursed his lips together, and his breathing became a more trembling one.
“I don't know. Maybe already in happy hunting grounds."
"Hey..." the chemist couldn't hide his snarl, as he didn't like Hajime talking like this, "You're not dead yet, okay?"
A short silence filled the air between them.
"I know,” the ill one gave in, “But...what I put him through right now, this is my fault. I did the most stupid thing that you could do with a letter bomb.”
Lowering his gaze at first, he looked up again, "It’s not like I’m not fighting. I am, more than ever. It’s just...I guess, I have reached my limits."
Leaning back into the pillow, he closed his eyes for a moment. His lashes fluttered lightly, as his whole nervous system was on the edge.
Damn it...why was it now, that he felt the urge to see Tooru so badly?
Why couldn't he remember that he had been there?!
It was too much...just too much to take.
“I'm not so sure you have” Kuroo then smiled, while Hajime shot a not so amused look at him, as the chemist held up the syringe on eye-level.
“This is the antidote. Tooru and I worked on this, and you’ll be able to survive. No more loss of memories, no more coughing, nothing. Just the old serious and too grumpy Iwaizumi Hajime.”
“That’s...not a fucking joke?” Hajime replied dryly, his eyes still focusing on the thing in Kuroo’s hand, “Don’t you dare kidding me now.”
“Do I look like a person who can joke about life-serious things?!” Kuroo played the offended one there.
Anticipation got Hajime. Expecation. A little straw of hope.
He felt how his heart got rid of a very heavy weight.
God, he so fucking hoped that it would work. That there wouldn't be any aftermath he read about.
He would need weeks to recover fully from the somatic symptoms...but as long as he would recover at all...
“I’d kiss you if I hadn’t already a future husband!” he murmured, not knowing that Kuroo had said the same before to Tooru.
Watching Kuroo reaching for the indwelling canula on his hand, watching him getting ready to inject the antidot directly into his veins, Hajime still couldn't believe his eyes.
“I don’t know if it’ll work instantly, I've never come across this before. But it should show some effect within one or two days. Then...you’ll be fine.”
He shot the substance slowly into Hajime's vein now, “I mean, I can’t wait to be the best man at your wedding, geez...”
“You don’t know how much this means to me" the forensic doctor swallowed, feeling the tears that were forming in his eyes, "You’ll be much more than the best man.”
"I can't be your husband!"
"Yeah. You can't, right."
Kuroo was done. Putting the empty syringe on the nightstand, he installed the paused infusion of ringer solution back on the cannula and then opened the flow regulator again.
“Thanks for everything...really. For all that happened and...that you're still not sick of us and kept working with us.”
Kuroo gave a long sigh and smiled at Hajime genuinely.
“You know...you and Tooru...you two are really idiots, but you mean a lot to me. So it was the least I could do.”
Notes:
Hey hey hey!!
How is it going? Our boy is safe! At least for now hehe...joking joking.
Thank you again for the constant support you give us, really! <3 ;P<3
Chapter 18: The final case
Summary:
"Maybe it's really better for Iwaizumi to die than living with you?"
“Maybe, but you won’t know about that.”
Chapter Text
As Tooru had rushed of the police department and headed to the location where the meeting point was set, Atsumu was sure that there was something coming up.
He didn't know when and how, but he had that gut feeling...and the premonition that Mori would contact Oikawa directly.
The police wasn't his goal. It was Oikawa...
And therefore, Atsumu was on guard. He let two officers observe the flat where his ex-colleague was living. He needed hints and if there were any, he would follow that bastard right away. Getting Mori arrested, and then Oikawa. End of the story.
“Miya-san” one of the officers called him on the phone a while later.
“Yeah, some news?” Atsumu replied with his phone stuck between shoulder and ear, while typing something on the keyboard at his work desk.
“Oikawa has left five minutes ago. He’s going to the direction of the river.”
Atsumu stayed silent in surprise for a moment, and even stopped hitting the keys.
He knew perfectly where Oikawa was going.
That little bastard...
“Thank you, further observing isn't necessary. You can come back to the PD.”
And so he hung up, jumping up from his chair and shutting down the computer quickly, after saving the file.
*
It was 1.58 pm, when Tooru arrived at the building.
His eyes were narrowed, focusing on the area. The same building where Heiji had died four years ago. That wasn’t a coincidence, Mori chose it well.
“Well, well. Were you so eager to see me, Mr Detective? You’re early” Mori mocked him right away, walking up to him in the empty room of the abandoned office complex.
Tooru stayed silent, only turning around to him - his worst enemy so far in life.
Hajime’s face came up straight to his mind, and he clenched his fists.
The bastard that had done that to him...was right in front of him. But he needed to stay calm. Very calm.
Don't make a mistake. Don't rush.
Tooru's eyes wandered around, checking the scene. They were in the 11th floor. Broken windows all over. The room had been one of the bigger ones for several workstations or conferences.
There was no place to hide. Just one way out, and Mori was blocking it still. Not that he wanted to escape, but Tooru needed an overview to calculate his chances.
While his eyes were flickering the room, Mori inspected him with an amused smile on his lips and his hands on his back.
"A wonderful day to end our little exciting story, don't you think so, detective? You know...stories can't go on endlessly. There's always the need for a good end. But...in my opinion, there will be no happy one" he spoke, getting closer step by step, the heels of his men's shoes echoing on the bare concrete ground.
"It doesn't matter who of us will die...the already caused damage can't be undone, and the audience will be heartbroken nevertheless. So tell me, speaking of that...how is our dear doctor doing? I think I did him a favour, if he won't remember anything of all the things that you had done to him, right? Not remembering at all before he'll die. My deepest apologies, that I didn't find a smoother possibility."
“He’s fine, not thanks to you. But,” Tooru said, taking a step towards him too, before speaking again, “You don’t have the right to speak of him. Don’t you ever dare!” and his voice was enraged, totally drenched in wrath, when he thought of everything Hajime had been suffering from.
“Unfortunately for you, Hajime will survive. Me and Kuroo worked out an antidote, and you can’t do anything about it now. He’s safe!”
A little challenging smirk appeared on the detective's lips.
"Oh...I hope he will" Mori said with a little shrug, "You know, I really appreciate the efforts he put in my little riddle. He made the right conclusions in no time, but still it was too easy to get that present in. Really, I think it's not his fault, but maybe the hospital should have learnt from four years, don't you think so? They haven't."
He gave a theatrical sigh.
"Well, it's actually no surprise that your dear chemist and you worked it out. But this doesn't mean I won't wipe off your everything after you'll be dead, Oikawa. You're not the only one who knows how to infiltrate. But I bet the whole situation has surely caused some anxiousness inside of you, right? First him, and...then there was the other guy who had owned me one..."
The one in the club who had died with such a scared expression...
"Actually, it isn't that he was worth to live anyway. Rapist of twleve children. Disgusting, right?"
“Everyone is worth living, you know?" Tooru objected sharply, "It's not our job to decide on someone's life. Even if they are filthy criminals like you, they don’t deserve to be killed, but surely put in jail!”
Tooru did the same now, and made a dramatical sigh as well.
“You know, in these two days...I made the police, uhm...let me think, find your collaborators and acquaintances and...guess what? Arrest them all. You’re no more danger, Mori. Seems you underestimated me, after all.”
He made it, breaking the crimnal mastermind's pokerface. Mori actually showed some kind of irritation. That was something he hadn't expect, nor heard of anyone of his servants, as he called them.
"Oh, that's really unfortunate" he replied, but his face was dead-serious now, "Taking your life, I told you I could have done it much sooner. Don't think too high of yourself. Even if you get some of mine arrested, I doubt that you can find all of them. You've only found one needle out of hundreds. And you won't find any more."
His voice got more dangerous, much darker than the one he used to talk to Tooru. His eyes didn't show any emotion anymore. That was what the psychopath really was like: nothing less than a selfmade judge, who was telling you who was allowed to live and who was not.
Mori held out his hands then. Unarmed.
"I don't like getting my hands dirty. Blood is always so hard to get off, and I don't need to." his hand slowly turned, palms up and...why was he grinning now?
"I don't think you'll get anywhere!"
Tooru recognised the voice, and for a second he felt a cruel shiver sent down his spine.
How? How had he...?!
"If it's not Detective Miya!" Mori exclaimed, clearly entertained.
"Stay where you are. No sudden movements, down on your knees!" Miya ordered loudly behind Tooru, and was holding up his gun, clearly aiming for the head of that bastard.
However, Mori stayed unimpressed and he only snapped lightly with his fingers.
A sharp and fast pain jumped to Tooru's brain as he flinched. He got touched by a gunshot right on his upper arm. Oikawa smirked back at the psychopath, glad that he had missed his target.
Well, at least that’s what he thought at first. But...would a hired sniper - hired by Mori - really miss it?
Atsumu hadn't heard a sound under his own echoing voice, but he then noticed a sharp cut on the sleeve of Oikawa's coat, his amber coloured eyes widened. Alarmed he searched the area around him for a hint. There was only the possibility that this had come from the other side of the building, outside the broken windows.
A sniper?
"Detective Miya, please...hold yourself back. It would be better for you!" Mori requested all too friendly and looked back at Oikawa, as if he had tamed a rude dog.
"But maybe...it'll be appreciated? I mean...wasn't he the one who had been working with your deceased friend? By the way, isn't it some coincidence that you both are attracted to that forensic doctor? You both had something for that poor police officer too."
Atsumu gritted his teeth, feeling all provoked now as there were things which hadn't been spoken as he had never wanted to speak about it at all.
For example, the feelings he had held for Heiji in the past.
"On. Your. Knees. Now!" he gnarled again, the finger ready to press and his eyes almost stabbing the criminal.
"Oikawa" Mori still ignored him and talked more calmly, "How does it feel...being a serial murder? I wonder...what else should have become of you? A wise man? No one who loved you and taught you how to live properly?" he chuckled, "Well...how could someone like you lead a proper life anyway? Marriage?"
He went for all now.
"Maybe it's really better for Iwaizumi to die than living with you?"
Tooru's arm bled slightly and in silence, it wasn't serious at all. But it was different with his heart, which got ripped open by every word that left Mori’s lips.
He clenched his fists, and all the millions of dark thoughts he had fought so well until now, with Hajime by his side, finally getting back on the track of life, made their entrance in an instant.
Maybe it’s better for Iwaizumi to die than living with you?
And that was what snapped something in him: twirling around, he grabbd Atsumu’s gun without hesitation, right out of the other's hand and pointed it at the psychopath.
“Maybe, but you won’t know about that” Tooru muttered, before shooting him down.
“Don’t!!!” Atsumu yelled, but the bullet had already hit its target and still, Mori’s smile didn't fade.
Not when he felt the bullet, hitting his chest.
Not when he was falling down.
Because he wasn't the only one that would die there.
Curtains closed.
“Fuck, I need backup!! Culprit is shot down. There’s also a sniper right in front of the building, watch out! We need an ambulance!” but it would be too late for Mori, whatever Atsumu was ordering now through his communicator on the front pocket of his jacket.
He rushed two meters forward to Tooru, grabbed his collar and pushed him down. Out of sight of the sniper, but also on the floor to pull his arms on the back.
Tooru's sight became empty.
He had destroyed his morals.
He said no one should die, not even the filthiest criminal.
But there he was, shooting him. Because...because...
“Idiot...” Atsumu hissed, “I don’t wanna give you the death penalty!” - for shooting someone down, taking a detective’s gun...that clearly made things hard.
Having his ex-colleague down like that, who didn't even fight back, handcuffs on, it took some minutes until he got the whole area cleared. A group of black clothed men with heavy body protection and even heavier gun weapons stomped suddenly in.
They pulled Tooru up and dragged him with them.
*
Daichi, who stood in front the building, looked shocked.
He stared at Tooru who was being arrested by Atsumu, and he noticed the cut.
“He needs first aid first!”
“Nothing to worry about” Atsumu only snarled to his superior.
“Miya. You still have-"
“I didn’t say I won’t get him to treatment!” Atsumu cut off, shoving Oikawa to the ambulance to let the paramedics have a proper look first. The rest was up to make Mori somehow survive upstairs.
“We can be lucky if our man is not dying because of this bastard here! If he does, all of our investigations since four years will be useless!!” Atsumu yelled out his frustration, his feelings about everything, the memories of Heiji and also because...yeah...because of Hajime.
That was the only thing he agreed with Tooru: he wanted Mori to cross-examine, to get something out of him...get that psychopath in jail and make him pay for his crimes, not release him with his death here and now.
Glancing over to Tooru, who sat on the chair in the ambulance, the latter one's arm was treated with some disinfectant and wrapped up in a light bandage.
Time to take him to the PD.
There was no need to interrogate him first, as the chief suggested to put him directly into custody, since he got arrested once before three days.
He could wait there for the real process to take place.
So Tooru sat down on his bed, or better, stretcher of his prison cell, looking around at the empty and cold small room with only the steel bars of the door showing his way out to the corridor. He ran his hands through his hair.
He just ruined it all, didn’t he?
But at least...Mori was dragged down too, and Hajime would survive. That was all that mattered. Right?
*
Atsumu sat down at his desk. Unsatisfied.
Why?
They finally got Mori, also disbanded his network before.
He arrested Oikawa too.
So why the hell was he so unsatisfied?!
“I’m out for a walk.”
He grabbed his jacket and walked off the office, before anyone could stop him.
Digging his hands deep in his pockets, he chose to take a path he hadn't walked down for quite a while now.
To the cemetery.
Actually, it had been four years since he last visited.
“Sorry...I couldn’t make it sooner” Atsumu apologized quietly, as he stood in front of Heiji’s grave.
He just couldn’t do it.
The pain. The wrath. Everything.
But now...
“I’m finally able to say that I got this bastard in jail, and we caught the one who murdered you! But, why...why am I still...” Atsumu hissed, pressing his lips together.
He noticed how neat the grave looked. Clean.
Someone had taken care of it. And he knew who.
With a shaky breath, he closed his eyes.
“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Heiji...”
It took him quite some time, until he was able to leave the cemetery again.
Red swollen eyes, crying for the first time in a forever.
Atsumu hadn't talked to his deceased friend further. Just standing there quietly, he had stared at the grey stone and got the movie in front of his eyes played.
When they had met for the first time...becoming police officers.
When they had become friends, visiting the place where his brother had learnt to become a chef himself.
When Heiji had confessed about his feelings for Oikawa...
Atsumu wiped off the last tears and walked quickly for a stop at his brother's.
It was crowded now, not the best for a private visit, as it was the typical after work business hour for Osamu.
Still...he needed to see him. He needed to see someone familiar now.
“Hey Samu, have a seat for your asshole detective brother?” he smirked wryly, as he already sat down in front of the other at the counter, not even waiting for a reply.
“Unfortunately” Osamu replied without motivation, but as he looked at his brother, wanting to give him another snarky-dry comment, he blinked.
“What is it, Tsumu?" he asked more sensitively now, "The last time I saw you crying...was four years ago? It’s rare of you.”
Atsumu looked up, rubbing his neck as he folded his arms in front of him then and averted eye-contact.
"Yeah?" he smiled weakly, but looked aside at a couple's table who was eating some good ramen soup.
“Dunno. We made it. Heiji’s murderer...we got him" Atsumu then just replied, not even sounding proud or anything like he usually would be, "He’s in serious condition, but will make it. And...I’ve finally put that bastard of a detective in jail too, but..."
He paused and then exhaled, looking at the counter's wooden surface in front of him now.
"I went to the cemetery.”
An almost silent confession.
“Haven’t been there since then...but you know, I...almost feel guilty?! And I don’t even know why!”
Osamu let his twin brother talk, knitting his eyebrows. Getting all the informations, he then spoke up.
“Maybe you feel guilty because...Oikawa isn’t the culprit after all?”
As Atsumu stared at him puzzled, he continued speaking.
“He’s always been innocent, and deep down in your heart, you knew that. You just couldn't accept it, nor forgive him for what happened. But right now...I bet you know well enough how life goes on, Tsumu” Osamu spoke honestly.
Lowering his gaze, Atsumu supported his head against his hands, hiding his face all over.
“My best friend died...I almost got a crush on..." a soft chuckle left his lips.
He felt ridiculous. So damn ridiculous.
"The man I started to love is first, engaged to Oikawa, and second, also about to die if there’s no miracle.”
Now a cynical smile appeared, “Of course I wanted to see him in jail...and now that he is, I don’t think...it’s really the right thing I did. Heiji would scold me for that! I’ve never been fond of Oikawa. Especially when Heiji talked to me about marriage and so...but...fuck...”
He didn't whimper or sob, but the tension in Atsumu's voice broke, and he started crying again.
“It’s today. All...happened today, four years ago...”
Osamu reached forward, stroking his brother's shoulder with an empathetic expression in his eyes.
“Tsumu, I need you to be happy. I can’t see my asshole twin like this, got it? So...” Osamu turned around and after half a minute of saying nothing, he handed him a plate with two onigiris, “Enjoy. Whatever life brings to you, enjoy it.”
Atsumu had almost sobbed under his brother’s comfort, but as he saw the rice dish, he actually did.
What an awful combination, being hungry and feeling so destroyed at the same time.
“T-Thanks!!” Atsumu replied with a trembling voice, and lifted his head a bit more to eat properly.
Not ashamed anymore, he didn't care that his brother or any other could see his tears. Right now, he was just grateful to have Osamu by his side. As always.
With a big bite, the detective started eating, chewing down all the stress and negative feelings. Filling his stomach with positive ones, caused by the onigiri.
*
Ushijjma had been called immediately and suddenly, a police officer opened the prison cell and ordered Tooru to come out.
He had to see his lawyer.
Other than the last time, he now had to go to the common room where you sat behind the window made of plexiglass and talking over phone.
Ushijima’s eyes didn't express anything, but he was well prepared as usual.
“How is your wound?” he asked first, as he had heard by Sawamura that the detective got shot too.
“Nothing serious, just a superficial wound” Tooru replied shallow, not even looking at him.
He was too lost in his thoughts and actually didn't want to have any visit by now.
“Good, you should be in good condition when the trial comes.”
“And why are you here? I’m going to stay in this place for a while, so don’t try too hard."
Empty eyes.
Ushijima noticed them, noticed how tired his defendant looked, but didn't say anything. Tooru was surely aware of it himself.
So he got back to business.
“What are you talking about?! You won’t make it out without a penalty, but I'll make sure that you won’t stay in here for something you haven’t done. The fact that Mori had a sniper behind him is reasonable enough to go into self-defense, even if you took a detective’s gun. There are many aspects to be aware of.”
Like a tsunami crushing down on me...
Tooru didn't have the power to talk back. He didn't want his help.
He knew better than anyone, that he would spend at least four years in jail.
Even if they forgave him the fact he shot Mori.
And Ushijima sensed that too well.
“I know that you yourself won’t make an effort to get out of here, but you don’t have to. As long as you’re in here. In the court I still need you to cooperate with me.”
The attorney stayed silent for a moment, “...I don’t think you want to let your fiancé wait for so long, do you?”
Suddenly, some empathy took over Ushijima's usual stern voice. Compassion he hadn't shown openly to Tooru, since they had first met a while ago.
It hit him.
It hit Tooru hard.
Thinking of Hajime...
“Ushijima, please, let me know about Hajime’s condition" Tooru blurted, the first emotional reaction at all, "I haven’t seen him nor heard anything since two days! Kuroo must have given him the antidote by now, but I don’t know if it helped at all. Please, I need to know!!”
Yeah, he cared for him...cared for him so much...more than for his own life.
Ushijima sighed in silence and nodded once more.
“As for now, I can’t do anything else for you. I’ll go right away. I let the police know that I’ll give you a call, so it shouldn’t be a problem outside the regulations."
Looking at Tooru into his brown exhausted eyes, Ushijima went on more concerned,
“You know...I know you don’t like me, giving you some advice, but let me do this for once: don’t look back right now, and focus on the present and the future. You want to live with Iwaizumi-san? Then we’ll make it work. Get some sleep, you’re absolutely exhausted.”
Telling him so, he stood up and head off to the hospital.
*
The next day...Atsumu felt wrecked like hell. He hadn't slept much. He hadn't slept well, and when he finally had, he was totally exhausted.
But still, his first visit was about going to the jail, asking for permission to visit Oikawa. He had to talk to him.
Walking up to the desk, he was led by the prison guard to the cells, who opened the main door to the small corridor in the basement. Atsumu stepped through and passed different cells. They were rarely occupied, but the ones which were, had rather dangerous looking inmates.
He did not look at them, averting eye-contact as it was written down in the rules - for the better and safety of everyone, even though they were behind the steel rods.
He stopped in front of the cell, where the detective was sleeping on his strecher.
"Hey, Oikawa. Wake up.“
Atsumu waited with crossed arms in front of his chest, but there was no answer.
"Oikawa?!“ he tried once more, but no answer again.
Strange.
That was exactly what his gut feeling told him. That something was off.
He turned his head over his shoulder, shouted to the guard to come over and open the cell.
Hesitating, Atsumu was asked for the reason, but teh guard only got a "Hurry up!" and so he fumbled with his keys, until the door was open.
The blonde detective walked over, calling Oikawa by his name again, but it was useless. Even shaking his shoulders didn't wake him up: he was unconscious.
Then, Atsumu noticed something else, inspecting the other's face carefully: purple lips, and his fingertips as well. His eyes wandered to Tooru's bandaged arm, putting a hand on it. Warm. Was it some kind of infection, or...?
“Call an ambulance!” he shouted to the guard, who stared at the inmate in disbelief. How was this even possible?
"W-what...?! I-I thought he was just sleeping?!"
"Doesn’t matter! Call an ambulance now!"
The man turned on his heels, ran off to his phone on the desk and called the 119. The next minutes, Atsumu checked on the vital signs, checking for Oikawa's breathing which was still there, but flat. His pulse was fast but also very flat.
When the paramedics arrived, taking over and putting the unconscious man on a mobile stretcher to get him into the car, giving Oikawa oxygen and all, Atsumu suggested that some poison might have been injected with the shot.
He accompanied them, as Oikawa was still an inmate and had to be observed as such, and they arrived at the hospital within fifteen minutes. Some more time passed, Atsumu waiting outside the examination room, sitting on a chair in the ER, until one of the doctors came out and told him that he had been right.
Oikawa got poisoned.
It was cyanide mixed with strychnine, which wasn't a lethal mixture - but only the snapshot in time.
What was critical was the coma state he had fallen in.
Atsumu exhaled heavily, trying to get his thoughts straight, trying to keep his composure as a professional.
So...Hajime was in a critical state, Oikawa was under serious treatment now too...
All they could do was wait.
But Atsumu wasn't the kind of guy who liked waiting much. He was similar to Oikawa.
After the doctor excused himself, getting to see after his patient and to prepare everything to get him to proper ward, the blonde detective walked off. While passing the corridor and getting to the entrance hall again, he made a call to his colleagues and reported about the recent events. That they had to send someone for watching Oikawa.
His feet took him to the isolation ward, where he asked for permission to see Hajime.
Getting into all the necessary clothes again to protect both of them, his heart however felt relief when he saw the forensic doctor sitting in his bed, after he entered the room.
Hajime was awake, he looked better. Much better.
No sweating, his breathing almost back to normal, and no coughing.
His olive-green eyes were more lively than before.
“Hajime-kun...” Atsumu greeted him softly, really glad that the shorter male made it.
The previous day...he hadn't been so sure about the outcome, but the antidote seemed to work.
Hajime looked up when he heard his name spoken by a familiar voice. First, being surprised about the visit, he then smiled weakly. Of course, his body was still exhausted, but he would be fine.
“Atsumu-san...nice to see you. Guess, I’m back from the dead.”
Back to his old self, his eyes narrowed a bit, after having a proper look at the other, “How are you? Alright? You look...tired?!”
"Look who's talking" Atsumu smirked now, shaking his head slightly, “I’m relieved...that you’re finally feeling better. May I?” he pointed over to the single chair in the room and Hajime nodded.
Taking it, Atsumu put it next to the bed and sat down.
“Just got some tough days at work, but actually...we managed to arrest Mori” he then explained, avoiding the Oikawa-topic for now.
Hajime’s eyes went wide in surprise.
“You got him?!” he repeated, but it got too fast and loud out of him, so he had to cough a bit because of the excitement, “That’s great!! God...how did you-?! But...”
The forensic doctor paused when his brain reminded him of the dangerous person, Mori was, “...I’m glad you're okay! Was he just...did you catch him red-handed or what?”
And then another question plopped up right: what about Tooru?!
“Actually...” Atsumu started with some hesitation, “Oikawa had a meeting with him. I followed him and so we managed to arrest him, but...”
He stopped. Yes, he came here to tell Hajime the truth. Because as soon as the forensic doctor would ask about Oikawa, he would get the news anyway. Still, he really didn't know how to tell him...
“But what?! What is it? What stupid thing did he do this time?” Hajime's eyebrows knitted, and he sighed, rubbing the back of his head then.
Stay calm. No need of overreacting, as he couldn't help it anyway, right?
“Atsumu-san...tell me please, what happened?”
"I...I arrested him too. Oikawa shot Mori” Atsumu explained finally, looking at the other with a serious but also compassionate expression in his eyes.
Nobody wanted to hear that his beloved one went to jail...and still he didn't tell him th worse yet.
“W-what?!” Hajime exhaled and stared at him, “He...wasn’t it self-defence or...whatever? How is he doing?!”
So, no surprise that he hadn't heard anything of him...
“Mori seemed to be unarmed” Atsumu replied, and noticed how Hajime's hands clenched to fists.
Lowering his own gaze, he continued after inhaling deeply, "Listen, Hajime-kun...he’s hospitalised in here, right now.”
"What?! What are you...?!“ Hajime's heartbeat rate went straight up, as it was to be seen on the monitor screen, "Atsumu-san, just tell me what happened in one row!"
Even if he didn't ask for it, he felt Atsumu's gloved hand on his own. He was trembling. Shit. He was overly worried. Worried for Tooru. Shocked.
He couldn't catch up with all the events there.
“Oikawa was unarmed too, at first" the detective went on in a calming voice, slowing down a bit, "I followed them, revealed myself and pointed my gun at Mori. But Oikawa snapped it from me and shot him. If it wasn't for him, we would be both dead. Mori had hired a sniper who still aimed at Oikawa successfully, but only slightly. Just superficially."
Hajime didn't interrupt him, listening to his words and imagining the scene in his mind.
"It was nothing serious at first, but this morning...I wanted to talk to him, but I found him unconscious in his cell. There were signs of poison and the doctor's just found out that the bullet was sprinkled with cyanide and strychnine."
"B-but he’s okay, right? He will be okay, right?! I mean...if it was just a sprinkle...?” Hajime's voice trembled.
He blinked away, looking at the ring on his finger and grabbing it tightly with his other hand, which released from Atsumu's.
"He's in coma" Atsumu sighed, and he felt truly sorry for Hajime, enduring the next tragedy after just recovering from his own serious illness, "I really don't know but he's getting the right treatment. They'll do everything they can."
“Yeah...okay..." the forensic doctor nodded absent-mindedly, "I mean...if there was immediate treatment, he should recover, and I guess it’s just that his body need the time to recover. So the coma is some temporarily state. Yeah...sounds reasonabl," he muttered to himself, trying not to go insane within the next ten seconds.
That woudn't help Tooru at all. He needed to get better, so he could be with him.
“I...I need to see him.”
Atsumu's mouth opened, but was interrupted before he could even try to speak up.
“I know he’s been here with me when I was at my worst and so...I have to see him!!”
Hajime's monitoring went almost to alarm, as panic got to him. He had survived that biochemical attack, and now Tooru would die? No, never!
“Hajime-kun, please...calm down!" Atsumu insisted, and held his hands up into a weak gesture, "You have to recover first too. And when you’ll be better, you can see him! Just...don’t stress yoursel, okay?"
“I can’t fucking calm down!!”
That little outburst made Hajime cough again, and as much as he hated it...he knew that Atsumu was right, but his stubborness was stronger.
And yeah, how should he even visit him? Being still under isolation as long as the symptoms hadn't disappeared, he couldn't walk out!
So...he couldn't do anything for Tooru, right?
Nothing...not even holding his hand...
“Shit...”
Bending over, Hajime cupped his face with his hands.
“How should I calm down when...the one I love...” he didn't finish the sentence. He just couldn't.
There wasn't a way. Maybe, if his own current state wouldn't be so fucked up.
“I know how you feel, because I felt the same way for you...” Atsumu admitted quietly after some time, “But you need to recover. Please...”
Right...he shouldn't forget.
There were also people who were damn concerned about Hajime's health. And as far as he didn't remember everything that had happened, nor recalling the last two days and only having the doctors explaining to him that he had been on artificially respiratory and everything...
And Atsumu...well...even if things had gone wrong between them...he still cared for Hajime.
“Sorry...that I made you worry” Hajime replied in a low tone, and leaned finally back into his pillow again, closing his eyes for a moment.
"Don't worry about that."
*
A day passed, and Tooru was stable for now, but who knew what might come.
Sawamura Daichi himself had taken the early shift of being the guard in front of the room, the detective was laying in a bed with white sheets. Still unconscious.
He couldn't have left it to someone else, as he wanted to be at least in some control.
Why had Oikawa put himself in such a dangerous situation?
Why...?
Maybe...had he maybe given it a thought? Dying?
Daichi's thoughts were interrupted by someone, whose steps were to be heard coming closer. Looking up, the police officer grabbed the stranger's arm and was about scolding him, that he wasn't allowed to enter, but then he saw Kuroo into his amber coloured eyes, and let go.
“Kuroo...I’m sorry...” the police officer smiled wryly, "I was a bit lost in thought."
“No, no!" Kuroo waved the apology off, "I’m the one who should be. He’s stilll under arrest, after all.”
“You can visit him, don’t worry. Exception for family and friends, here” Daichi shook his head.
They exchanged some more words, and then Kuroo quietly entered the room.
Walking over to the bed in which his friend seemed to be sleeping peacefully, the chemist's heart sunk a bit.
Kuroo saw Tooru's chest raising a bit too weakly. He looked at the monitor that showed the heartbeat rate almost in brachycardia too. But a steady pace.
“You said you wanted to see Iwaizumi safe and sound, and now that he is...you’re doing this?” the chemist mumbled, his voice a bit low.
He tried to cover his fear to lose that guy. It didn't suit Tooru, laying in that bed, not wearing his beautiful and cheerful smile, not hearing his never-stopping talkative mouth. Not seeing his sparkling eyes because of a new case. None of these were to be seen and it didn't suit him...
Kuroo pulled out an handwritten note out of his jacket's pocket. It was his own writing, but he copied the content, as Iwaizumi had told him something to give to Tooru via message.
Tooru, I can’t be there for you, sitting on your bed and holding your hand.
But I will as soon as the isolation is over, and I hope that you’ll be already discharged by then.
Thank you for worrying about me. And I am sorry for hurting you so much the past days.
Even if it is Kuroo, who has to tell you this: I love you.
He read each line. Word by word.
Reading aloud those intimate phrases were a bit embarrassing and he felt like someone digging his nose too deep into other people's relationships.
But it was necessary.
Tooru needed to know that he wasn't allowed to go yet.
Putting the note right under the pillow when he had ended, Kuroo straightened up again and watched his friend a little longer.
"Just wake up...your future husband, me, and many other people are waiting for you, idiot."
Funny...Oikawa had never had someone waiting for him.
And now, so many people were...but the most important one of them was Hajime.
Kuroo sighed again. As a chemist, he perfectly knew that a mixture of cyanide and strychnine wasn't something that could be taken down so easily.
And he was worried about it.
Because if Tooru couldn't make it...or if he could, there would be after effects on his brain functions or so...he would be destroyed.
And Hajime, too.
*
More time passed, and each day Kuroo was in charge to deliver some notes to Tooru. Even though Hajime knew, that he might not read them soon. That he might not even hear Kuroo reading them. Yet.
With every day, Hajime hoped for a "Hey, he's awake" by the chemist when he returned to him, but it didn't happen.
Hajime himself got better and better. Most of the symptoms had finally disappeared, but it would need much more time to have his whole energy back.
After four more days, the forensic doctor was discharged from the isolation ward and transferred to a normal one. He hadn't seen Miya for days, but they exchanged some messages. Still, the forensic doctor sensed that the other wasn't feeling comfortable around him. Might be because of the circumstances or because of the fact that he arrested Tooru. That he might regret it or anything else...who knew.
Now, sitting on the bed in his new room, Hajime looked around and then gave it a try to stand up.
Physiotherapists had already begun with their work a while ago - the passive movements - and for three days now, the forensic doctor had been exercising actively.
It was exhausting! He still had to focus and to feel how his body was working, as he wasn't used to walk around or do anything else. Yes, it was frustrating, that he had to learn it like a baby, but getting rid of the funny isolation scrubs and being allowed to wear something else made it bearable.
Fortunately, Akaashi had already brought some clothes there, and Hajime made it with all of his effort to the wardrobe, just three metres ahead. Taking what he needed, and already feeling the sweat on his skin because he was standing too long. Collapsing back on the bed, he even felt a bit dizzy.
Take it slow - he had to remind himself, breathing in and out.
He wanted everything too fast. Recovery. Getting back to his old self.
Of course...
So, being prepared for his big master plan, he waited for Kuroo's daily visit and hydrated himself in the meantime with some sips of water.
When the chemist entered the room after knocking twice, Hajime smiled and greeted him.
“How are you doing today? Can you stand up or...?” Kuroo asked, returning the smile.
"Much better" the patient nodded, "Getting rid of the scrubs, having some proper shower and everything."
And he was actually looking way better than before.
"Just...quickly exhausted if it comes to walking and so..." Hajime looked up, "I crave a boon, though...“ he then began, still smiling.
However, Kuroo could already guess by that kind of smile, that was the typical one if it was about Tooru, it was much softer, almost a bit embarrassed.
"I may already guess..."
Kuroo didn't need any further explanation. He nodded, when he saw the letter in Hajime's hand, that he didn't give to him this time.
So he turned around and took the wheelchair in the corner of the room and brought it to the bedside.
Getting Hajime transferred from the bed into it, and being finally able to visit his boyfriend on his own.
"Sorry, I make you even move me around" Hajime spoke with an apologetic smile, and he was really grateful for everything the chemist had done.
They had been colleagues before, but getting involved with Tooru...he also had been developing a better relationship with Kuroo too. And it was more than a nice feeling to know that they managed to get closer than just workmates. Becoming friends.
“Do you need any help or you want to go alone?” Kuroo asked, when they were standing in front of Tooru's room.
"I don’t think you wanna see me pining at him" Hajime joked, thanked him once more, and then stood up, opening the door to step in.
Even if it would exhaust him again, he would take it. If it was for Tooru, he would take it.
However, he had expected a much better looking detective than he got to see him there. It made him even forget his own tired limbs from walking.
Tooru was still in coma, still unconscious, his fluffy hair down, his breathing light, supported by some oxygen mask.
Yeah...that was the most important fact: that Tooru was alive. That Hajime could finally hold his hand again...right?
Sighing, he sat down on the mattress next to Tooru's body. Carefully, he took his hand and caressed the back of it gently, watching his beloved one.
"Hey Tooru...I’m here" Hajime announced with a hurt, faint smile, "I...made it out of the isolation. Won’t recommend you that, it's too boring."
He swallowed, then reached with his fingertips to Tooru’s cheek, caressing it softly. Stroking his fringe a bit back, so his forehead was more exposed. Hajime's eyes noticed the small bundle of notes on the nightstand. All the messages which Kuroo had brought to him and read aloud.
"At least...I can finally read them to you myself. It isn't the same, when Kuroo has to do it."
Holding the detective's cool hand, Hajime took out the latest letter from his pocket, unfolding it, "And I think it would get too embarrassing now to make him do this."
Smirking, he looked at the lines, "Just to tell you...I’m not good at writing love letters."
And there, Hajime inhaled, starting to tell Tooru every written word on this paper:
"My love...Tooru...I love you.
I fell in love with you without noticing it. I fell in love with everything you do...your looks, your laughter, your warmth. How you comfort me, caress me.
Later, when you became my boyfriend, my partner, my future husband, I fell in love with you all over again. I love how you whisper my name. How you moan it. Each syllable is a melody for me. And I’m happy that I haven’t got any other name, because your way of saying it is just perfect.
I love to watch you sleep. I love how it feels making love with you...I love everything, when it comes to you.
I love you so much, Tooru, and during the last days...I was able to think a lot. Remembering these times with you. Remembering how I felt before, without you. How it was for me, not remembering you anymore. My body ached, more than any physical stress could do. It ached because of the pain of forgetting. I wrote all these memos into my phone to get an outline. The most important one was this: don’t hurt him. But I did, and I’m sorry.
You know what was funny? I couldn’t take off my ring. I didn’t remember why I had it, but I couldn’t take it off. It would have felt wrong. How is it? I don’t know, but I think it was my heart, which told me to hold on. To keep this feeling of love inside. Today, I will be able to visit you for the first time in days...Kuroo helps me out once more. And I hope you can read this letter by yourself...seeing you smiling while doing so...or...tearing up..."
Hajime stopped. His vision blurred.
He felt how tears were actually coming up.
Hajime held Tooru‘s hand tighter, when he wiped off those damn water pearls. Still sobbing, he needed a few seconds to get his composure again.
Of course, it was questionable how much Tooru could hear. What he was sensing. This time, different from the last times with Kuroo, they actually got through him.
Maybe, because his heart was linked with Hajime’s.
His expression stayed peacefully, there was no flinching at all, but somehow tears began to stream down. Still unconscious, he was crying.
Hajime looked up and...
"Tooru...?!"
No, he was still unconscious. Unconscious, not moving, not even giving a light reaction with his fingertips, but he was shedding tears?!
"God...Tooru...“
It broke him.
Hajime bent over, coming closer and wiping off the tears from his love‘s cheeks a bit too dry skin with his trembling hand.
"Please, wake up...please..." he muttered, sending all his prayers to heaven, and lowered his forehead on Tooru's shoulder, "Please wake up...I...I just...I still do wanna marry you!! I wanna live with you!! Maybe even having kids later or...!!"
Hajime couldn't stop crying with heavily sobs now, giving in to the feeling he had held the whole week.
The fear of losing each other. Whether it was himself, almost crossing the threshold to the nirvana, or if it was Tooru...
Suddenly, the monitor went on alarm. Hajime had wanted to tilt his head to the side, just to bury his nose for a moment in the crook of the neck of his love, but then...
"T-Tooru?!"
Tooru’s heart began to beat faster than normal, went right into tachycardia and as Hajime was crying, a trail of fresh blood was flowing down Tooru's bottom lip.
Not only a little trail...it became more. More and more.
Where the hell was all the blood coming from?!
Hajime jumped up, eyes still on the massive blood stream, running over Tooru's mouth and colouring his skin, the hospital gown and the sheets in light red.
Internal hemorrhage?!
He searched for the alarm, pressed the button multiple times but it was too slow for him.
Hajime stumbled to the door, breathless, slammed it open and just yelled with shaky voice: “We need a doctor! He’s bleeding!! Internal bleeding!!”
Two nurses looked up, running over and into the room, shoving Hajime aside who was standing with his back on the wall, being a hindrance.
The doctor came in, his expression more than serious as he saw the mess.
“We need to stop the bleeding! Get him to the OR! Order the blood units!! When did it start?!” he asked Hajime, who was quite like in trance, nodding.
“J-Just a minute ago...”
The blood pressure began to fall as Tooru was still monitored and the beeping sound got loudly into the ears of everyone.
The wheel brakes of the bed were released quickly, and they were bringing him outside.
Hajime wanted to follow instinctively, of course, but right after a few meters he was held back by a nurse.
“Let me go!!” he yelled, “Just let me go!!”
Tooru’s condition was critical and they forced him to stay there?!
“I have to...I just have to...!!”
He tried to free himself, but struggling like that punished him fast enough, and his whole body started aching after straining himself so much. Another coughing attack made him bent over, gasping for air.
What...what had just happened?!
This can't be...it just can't be!!
If Tooru had been awake, he would have surely said something like that: isn't it funny, how life is so brief still so beautiful to live?
*
In the OR, they aspirated the blood quickly, opening him up. Stopping the hemorrhage was a difficult task though, as it had hit some major arteria.
But yes...they saved Tooru. Just for now.
It happened that there were some other minor internal bleedings and he had to get into the OR once more.
Each surgery was another risk that he would never wake up again, as it was a hard pressure for his body - being on his limit and still being pushed over it.
Tooru seemed to be paler and paler each day. Almost as if...he was already dead.
No one had ever seen someone like that, still alive.
Doctors were trying anything to stop the poison's effects.
And Hajime...Hajime was devastated.
More than a week had passed, and his beloved Tooru was still unconscious.
It had been the worst time ever of waiting for Hajime.
Even four years ago, when they had the first letter bomb.
Even when he had waited for the doctors to save his mother...
Nothing was compared to what he felt now for Tooru.
Waiting, hoping, praying.
He was safe. He hold his hand again. Another bleeding.
Waiting, hoping, praying.
Holding his hand again. Bleeding.
They almost gave Hajime sedatives to calm himself down.
“Iwaizumi-san, you have to eat.”
Akaashi looked at the untouched food in front of his colleague and friend, who had started researching for anything which could help Tooru, and forgot - while bending over his phone - to eat.
“Later” Hajime only mumbled, which made Akaashi frown. A rare expression of his.
“Not later. Now.”
He took the device out of Hajime's hand, who complained loudly, and looked at the display.
“Iwaizumi-san...you know you can’t force the process-"
“But I can’t just sit around and do nothing!!”
“You can take care of yourself.”
The forensic doctor hissed. Yeah...he was right. Of course, Akaashi always was.
“You look like a ghost yourself. I know it’s devastating but-"
“You know nothing!” Hajime snapped, ready to pick up the fight as everything was just so fucking unfair.
It didn't matter to him, who it was he had to fight with.
“You don’t know how unbearable it is, first being the one who gets almost killed, and now, seeing Tooru like this and...and...”
Akaashi just let him rage. Let him be angry. He had every right to be.
Of course, Hajime was scared, but...
“You’re doing too much research” his assistant replied, “You’re doing everything you can, but only focus on the bad stuff that can happen, if he wakes up. Kidney failure. Memory and brain damage in general. Being impaired for the rest of his life.”
“Nothing will happen to him, if I find something useful ofr him!”
“And when was the last time you read him out something from you?! When was it?” Akaashi's voice sounded louder than usual.
Hajime stayed silent. Since that emergency...
“Iwaizumi-san, focus on the good stuff and let the doctors do their work! Just be there for him. Because...do you wanna regret it, not being by his side if it gets worse?”
No...of course not...
“So eat that damn smashed potatoes with cooked vegetables and stuff! And then: move your ass to his room!”
And it was rare to hear Akaashi swearing like that. It...was actually the first time, Hajime heard him swearing at all.
And that was the wake-up call.
"Okay...but don't expect me to like it. It lacks of every taste!"
Notes:
Hey hey hey!
If you think about the last time Oikawa and Iwaizumi spend time with each other, was when they made love...kinda sad. Now that Mori is gone, will everything be okay for our two babies?
Thank you again for all the support!! It means a lot to us <3
Chapter 19: On hold
Summary:
“You don’t even look at me.”
“Because I can’t.”
“I want to Iwa-chan, I want to...” Tooru broke out in tears, still obliged to look at those fucking stars, instead of his boyfriend.
“Do you hear me, Tooru?” Hajime then said.
He did.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Tooru was at Hajime's favorite place, staring at the stars.
They were beautiful. The night sky was in colored in a dark blue, the little orbs sparkling widely above his head.
Actually, he had hoped some aliens would show too.
And there he was, the most beautiful human he knew, when Tooru turned his head over his shoulder: Hajime.
Tooru smiled at him, with his sparkling and loving brown eyes, a sweet expression on his face. But only for a second, as if he was forced to look back into the night sky again.
“Tooru, I love you” Hajime said, which made the detective chuckle.
“I know that, Iwa-chan. I love you too!” he replied all smiling.
“Then why do you keep hurting me?” Hajime asked suddenly with a serious expression written on his face.
“W-What do you mean?” Tooru's soft expression remained.
“You don’t even look at me.”
“Because I can’t.”
He wanted to look at him, but somehow...he couldn't.
He wanted so much, but it was impossible?
“I want to Iwa-chan, I want to...” Tooru broke out in tears, still obliged to look at those fucking stars, instead of his boyfriend.
“Do you hear me, Tooru?” Hajime then said.
He did.
*
“Do you hear me, Tooru?"
Hajime held his hand between his own, caressing his fingers carefully. Tooru felt it.
“I love you...you know, even Akaashi scolded me. Because I’m just denying the awful hospital food. You know it’s awful.”
He watched him, came closer and put his head on Tooru’s chest.
“I miss you. I miss your voice. I miss your teasing and stupid jokes” Hajime stared at an invisible spot.
He was so tired...tired of all the waiting.
"I want to...spend more time with you. Going for walks. Sitting in cafés and everything. Just...doing cliché couple stuff."
After he had lunch, he had gone to Tooru's room. It was now much easier for Hajime and he didn't have to use a wheelchair anymore.
So the letter...usually, he would read it out, but today...it was all just in his mind. Each word...
"...and doing some proper stargazing. With hot chocolate. You know...I’m just looking up to them each night, and wish for you to open your eyes. It’s like...I don’t know...you want to wake up, don’t you?"
His voice was a scared whisper now...
"Because I won’t let you go! I'll wait for you. I'll wait for you as long as it's necessary..." Hajime swallowed, "Just...as long as you'll be with me again...I'll wait."
Looking up, he touched Tooru’s lips with his fingertips. They were dry and a bit cold.
Almost dead.
As if his body was giving up. The functions all reduced to keep his core alive.
Almost dead.
Only the machine could prove that he was still alive.
*
He felt Hajime's finger tips touching his own, gently.
“You know, I wanted to live with you” Hajime says, while Tooru still couldn't look at him.
“And you don’t want to now?” Tooru asked concerned.
He didn't want to stay alone again. No more.
“Of course I do, idiot” Hajime replied with some strictness in his voice.
Then he held Tooru’s hand again, lifting it up on eye-level.
“I want to marry you, so look at me!” Hajime begged with his reassuring and calm voice.
Even if Tooru was by his side now, he was still missing Hajime.
He was missing him so much. How was that possible?
“I can’t” Tooru spoke sadly in a lower voice.
“Then...I’ll wait for you to do so. Love me back, Tooru! Marry me! Look at me like you used to!” Hajime's words sounded so hurt, so desperate.
“Hajime...” Tooru only whispered, the stars remaining ahead of his vision field.
“I love you...don’t leave me...” he was the one who was begging now.
“Never” Hajime promised with a smile, and then Tooru tightend the grip around Hajime’s hand with his own little smile.
*
The forensic doctor had his eyes closed, just for a moment, pretending everything was normal. Just...for two minutes...
God...if this would take much longer...
Hajime knew that one day, he would have to decide.
Whether to continue with interventions, if Tooru’s body became too weak to work on his own or... But how could he?
How would he ever be able to decide that...?!
Some of Tooru’s fingertips moved trying to hold Hajime’s hand back.
Hajime casted up his eyes, sitting up straight.
"Tooru..."
He looked at the moving fingertips in disbelief.
How Tooru tried to...hold his hand?!
His heart skipped a beat, and a little smile appeared on his mouth no one had seen for so long.
"I’m here. I’m here, Tooru! You hear me?! I’m here!!"
He said it again and again, and carefully brushed the back of his love‘s hand.
A first sign...a little sparkle of hope.
"Tooru...you can do this! I’m sure you can!!"
But then...Tooru’s fingers stopped. They stopped moving.
He couldn’t.
*
Two more days passed, and Hajime seemed to be exhausted more and more by hoping for Tooru to wake up.
The doctors spoke to him, telling him that they had to make a decision soon. Whether they should continue with the on-pump or...
Hajime cried, when the reality hit him. Akaashi and Kuroo tried to comfort him, but it was hard, when they themselves didn't see much hope there. Everyone thought so, even Daichi and Atsumu, and that made it only harder to still believe in a happy end.
Tooru’s hands seemed to get even colder. His facial structures, his cheeks so hollow...
"His fingertips! He moved them!"
Those mere movements he felt with his own fingers were everything for the forensic doctor. They made him run to the doctor's, speak to them until they listened. That they shouldn't give up.
And first, they did. They examined Tooru all over. Tthey couldn't anymore.
They looked at him, exchanging looks all over again, and then the ward physician stepped towards him, putting a hand on Hajime's shoulders.
"Iwaizumi-san...you know better than anyone, that these movements could also be just some nerval reaction. Every single time, it...it was nothing more than this. I guess...we should talk about the options now. It's time."
But Hajime didn't want to. He didn't want to talk about options.
He didn't want to decide, whether to put Tooru on some machine or let him die.
He didn't want to decide how long he would be put on the machine at all.
Leaving the ward, he went back to his own room and sat down on his bed, trying to deal with that.
Looking at his ring for a longer moment, he took his phone and just swiped through the gallery.
The pictures they had taken together...
He scrolled through all the other photos, but it was like experiencing a tunnel view.
Tooru was the only thing Hajime could see.
He continued to visit Tooru. For hours.
He only left when he had to. When he was seen off by the nurses.
It was so ridiculous. They even started to bring him his own lunches there, instead to his own room, where he was hospitalised.
Slowly closing the door behind him, when he visited Tooru again, he looked at the sleeping detective.
Going to the nightstand, he took out a comb, and sat down.
"Hey, love...here I am" Hajime spoke quietly, bending down and kissing Tooru softly on his lips, "I...I'll take a little care of you, okay?"
Carefully, he started combing Tooru's hair, trying to make it look in his usual shape. Trying to get in some normality.
"You know...I said that I would give you time, but...time is against you. You really need to wake up soon. I tried to convince them, that you react to me. That nothing is ended. But...they still think it's just a normal reflexive response. I don't think so."
Finishing, he put the comb aside, and took out the moisturizer and the skin care he had asked Kuroo to get from Tooru's apartment a while ago.
Dipping his finger in the white cream, he rubbed it softly on Tooru's cheeks and lips.
"I believe in you. I believe that you are there, that you hear me."
Dipping in the moisturizer again, he took Tooru's hand, the one with the ring on it, massaging the cream over the skin.
"God...you're so cold...you always have cold hands, Tooru! Remember, cuddling up in bed? You shocked me!" Hajime had to smile sadly.
He moved the ring a little, to get the cream over that spot too, then just held his hand a moment. It wasn't good...Tooru's body was already focused on the core, considering energy supply. Not good.
"And your feet...your feet are always so freaking cold! I'll give you a hottie for your birthday!" he chuckled, but then Hajime felt the tears that dwell up, "Shit...I don't even know when it is! You haven't told me yet!"
Hajime's voice broke and he lowered his head. The cruelity of the reality had sunk in.
"Tooru...come back to me, please...! Don't...don't just leave me alone! I didn't show you my safe place for nothing. I can't...I can't go on without you. I'm just...I..."
He paused, biting his bottom lip, as the sobs took over his composure.
"Tooru, I beg you, just once...! P-please...come back! Open your eyes, darling! Wake up..."
*
“Tooru” Hajime spoked up suddenly, while the detective was still staring at his beloved stars, that didn't stop shining brightly above his head.
He hummed back as a sign that he was hearing him.
“I can’t go on like this...” Hajime said calmly.
“Are you...going to leave me?” Tooru asked in fear.
“You’re the one who’s leaving me alone, Tooru” Hajime replied, his olive-green eyes were teary all over.
“Hajime...are you alive? Did the antidote work?” Oikawa asked seriously now.
He didn't know about the other's condition. Whether he was really alive or whether...it was just a dream.
“Tell me you’re alive...I’m so tired, Hajime" Tooru closed his eyes as his voice was just a mere whisper, "I never felt so exhausted. I want to go home...”
“I’m alive, Tooru. I’m waiting for you, so look at me!!” Hajime insisted and that time...it was possible.
With all his might, Tooru forced himself to avert his eyes from the sky. To turn his head to Hajime. To...look at him. Yes...he looked at him...at Hajime...his love.
How much he had missed those olive-green eyes! That now were full of tears.
“Hajime...” Tooru lifted his hand, caressing his cheek gently with a weak smile.
*
Hajime was sobbing, crying all his heart out and just holding on so desperately.
“Too...ru...”
He suddenly neither sobbed nor blinked.
In his ears sounded a high-pitched tune quietly. His gaze wandered to the monitor, that had been turned down in the volume.
No...it was not the flat line Hajime almost expected. No. That was not the case.
Or... was it? Flat line?
“Tooru?!”
He now called again, panicked. Feeling his own chest tightenening and making it hard to breathe at all.
“Tooru...no...no, no, no! Tooru!!”
His hands grabbed his love by the shoulder, eyes wide in shock, as he realised that Tooru’s heart actually stopped beating.
That was it? That should be the end?
“God, Tooru!!! Please! Fight! Please, don’t do this to me!!!”
Hajime’s voice got shaky again and he was just staring at him in shock, not able to think or act, as...there was some little beeping again. And another.
Beep...beep...beep...
Tooru opened his eyes slowly.
The light of the hospital room gave him some pain as he wasn't used to have bright light hitting his eyes anymore, and he blinked multiple times.
And then...right in front of him...with his olive-green eyes...
“Haji...me...” Tooru whispered with a hoarse voice.
The forensic doctor stared at his fluttering eyelids...Tooru opened them?!
Yes...he opened them.
He had called him by his name.
The first thing which came over Tooru’s lips was Hajime’s name!
Totally tensed, totally on the edge of going insane, because he thought he lost him - once and for all - and because he thought his mind was playing tricks now on him, Hajime cupped his mouth with his trembling hand, while the other still held lightly on Tooru’s shoulder.
Alive...he was alive and awake...
“Haji...”
Tooru called once more, putting his hand on Hajime’s now, weakly. He tried to hold it, but felt still so weak.
“You’re...alive...” Tooru whispered, a tear flowing down his cheek.
“Idiot...” Hajime could only give him a ugly crying-smile, and turned his hand around to intertwine their fingers.
He held him as he always would, if Tooru was too weak to do so.
“It's my turn to say this..."
Hajime leaned in, catching that single tear from Tooru’s cheek, and then lowered his head, leaning his forehead against the other’s temple.
“I’m...I’m so glad you’re back...I’m so glad you’re finally back...” he whispered as his voice cracked.
More crying. More tears. But finally out of relief and happiness.
“Don’t...cry...please...” Tooru exhaled, and his fingertips tried to catch Hajime’s tears.
He wasn’t dreaming, was he?
He felt the warmth of this hand. The warmth in his voice. That couldn't be a dream, right?
“I’m so glad...the antidote worked...” Tooru managed to speak another sentence.
Even now, when he was like that, when he just woke up from his coma...his first concern was Hajime, and Hajime only.
Hearing his voice...he had missed it so much. So, so much...
And the feeling of his touch...everything...
“Kuroo and you...it’s thanks to you...” Hajime replied, holding Tooru’s hand a bit more gently, as he could accept himself that it wasn't his imagination, but real.
He was talking to Tooru again. Really talking.
Hajime lifted his head a bit, looking at him into his still dizzy and tired eyes.
“God...I’ve never told you how beautiful your eyes are...” he murmured, shaking his head lightly, “I so missed you, Tooru...I...so damn missed you...”
Hajime leaned in more, fondling Tooru’s nose with his own.
“You...remember who I am, right? No more loss of memory?” Tooru asked with a soft smile, still concerned as it had hit him hard in the past, that Hajime had looked at him all so hollow. Like a stranger. He got a nod as an answer. Yes, Hajime was totally himself.
“I missed you too, Hajime...I didn’t know if you were alive...and still...I couldn't be there by your side...”
He felt guilty for hurting Hajime and making him suffer like that. That he made a big mistake during his investigations. That he had almost ruined both of their lives.
“I hurt you, didn’t I?” Tooru then said, looking at him with worried eyes.
"Not as much as I hurt you..." Hajime breathed and lowered his gaze, "I know it's not my mistake that my memory left me, but...still, I am so sorry for that. And just...I hadn't been cautious enough, on that day. I should have known better. Instead, I acted like a stupid amateur..."
Looking at Tooru into his eyes again, he spoke up again.
"But it's not your fault, that you had been poisoned" Hajime paused, glancing aside with a short smirk, "Guess, we could tell each other again and again, that it's not our fault and still...we'll feel guilty..."
Another break.
"I think...right now, it's just important that we're both here. Alive. Together."
Tooru's fingers brushed Hajime's, and couldn't stop looking at him, as if...no, not a as if - Hajime was the most beautiful human being in the world for him.
“Can I...kiss you?” Tooru asked quietly, gazing at those lips that he had started to love so much. He was fascinated by them.
Hajime noticed, that Tooru was watching him. Observing him. Every little piece of him.
And he loved it, how focused he was. How his lashes were cast down while doing so. How Tooru's own lips moved a bit in anticipation and impatience.
How his whole body was telling Hajime, he wanted to feel Hajime's touch, his kiss...
And his question was so pure.
“I was just about to ask you the same” Hajime admitted with a smile and came closer, “But please...go on...I’ll kiss you next.”
Feeling the tingling breath on his own skin, Tooru didn't have to put too much effort in to overcome the little distance. Just a bit.
And for the first time in a felt forever, for Hajime it was like his heart finally knew how to feel at ease again, and only being excited about being with Tooru again.
Tooru smiled. He missed kissing Hajime so much, that he almost seemed focused all too serious.
He leaned in and then his lips finally touched Hajime’s. Caressing with his tired fingertips his cheek.
God, it felt so right.
He hadn't kissed Hajime since...yeah, since this hell had happened to both of them.
Tooru moved his lips slowly, kissing him nostalgically, and a little moan escaped the detectives throat, making him chuckle.
“Hajime...” Tooru said, after they both parted, “The last time we kissed...was when we...made love...” he smiled in sweet remembrance, “I missed you so much...there wasn’t a single day...I haven't thought of you. Because I just...I just can’t live without you, Hajime...”
“Forgive me...that I had to leave you alone for a while...” Hajime replied quietly then, feeling the sudden tight grip around his hand, and returned it with one of his own.
Tooru sobbed, all the emotions he had bottled up since Hajime had got infected and got into a worse condition came up. He had feared so much, that Hajime would have left him for real...that...he would have to be alone again.
“I was...going to give up, you know? I...didn’t know if you were alive or not...and my body refused to...stay alive without you...” Tooru admitted, looking at the forensic doctor’s eyes, "I kept dreaming of you...and somehow...I heard you. Your presence. I missed you, Hajime. I...missed you...and I...love you...”
A warm shiver was sent up his spine as Hajime heard those words, while he was holding Tooru gently in his arms. And Hajime understood, too much.
“So...you did hear me” he whispered after a little pause, putting his mouth in a thin line, because he also felt how the emotions wanted to take over control, “You fought so well...and you tried to stay strong when I couldn’t. For both of us. I...I came here every day as soon as I was able to. Trying to talk to you. Reading you letters. Everything just... because I couldn’t believe that you weren't there anymore. Didn’t matter to me if others said I was imagining things."
Wiping the tears away that ran down Tooru’s cheek, Hajime exhaled with a trembling breath.
“I think it’s the same for me. I...can’t live without you. I just can’t. I love you so much...so much, that I can’t express this. Tooru...I’m glad...I’m so glad you’re awake. I missed you. Your smile, your laughter, you, looking at me...everything.”
Tooru glanced over to the nightstand, noticing the buch of letters now.
“You did...this for me...?” he whispered in surprise.
How much effort Hajime did put in visiting him every day, reading him letters, worrying for him...
"B-But don't expect much poetry. I'm really bad at writing such things" Hajime mumbled with a cute blush on his face, “I mean...it...actually, it was the first time I ever wrote love letters to someone.”
Tooru's eyes widened a bit and he noticed the reddish cheeks of the other with a wry smile. So lovely...
And Tooru looked so guilty.
“I’m sorry, it...took me so long to wake up...”
Silence filled the air for a moment and Hajime tried to change that subject a little bit, cheering him up.
“At least...tell me...if you had a good dream? Have we been to some beach?! Having drinks and all?”
Tooru smiled lightly, shaking his head.
“In my dreams, we were at you favourite spot...on the hill. Staring at the stars...I want to do that again. With you” Tooru said, looking at him.
“I want to live every moment by your side...but I guess...I can’t keep this promise” Tooru added, remembering that he had been arrested, before...right.
And even though it was coincidence, it was just the right timing. The door opened after had been knocked, and two familiar faces appeared in the room: Daichi and Atsumu stepped closer, their eyes widened as they saw that Tooru looked at them - really looked at them.
"You're finally awake..." Daichi exhaled and you could see how his shoulders sunk in relief, "I'm really glad..."
“Hey...” Tooru greeted both of them with a weak smile - even towards Atsumu.
“You really made us worry, you know? This man here was crying because he was missing your annoying voice!” Daichi joked, patting Hajime on the shoulder who couldn't help it but blush, because it was simply true.
“Guess, I woke up only to return to jail, huh?” Tooru chuckled, coughing a bit because of his dry throat.
The mood dropped in the room, and Atsumu could only nod in return. His eyes wandered to Hajime, who had a serious expression now in his face.
“Actually,” Atsumu began, when Daichi nudged him in the side to say something to, “First, you have to recover and then...we have to rethink...I have to rethink...” he corrected, “regarding the reason I arrested you.”
It was difficult for Atsumu to speak out those words, but it was even more difficult to look at Tooru in the eyes while doing so, “Maybe...I think, I still can’t overlook the fact that you took my gun, but else...we would be dead. With that sniper and everything.”
He really was bad with those things. Especially when the man you're in love with is watching you.
“It needed me to nearly die for you to change your mind on that, huh?” Tooru teased, but he noticed Atsumu’s uncomfortableness.
The blonde detective looked aside, clicking his tongue. Just giving a quiet “Not funny.”
And therefore, Tooru dropped it, “Can you...leave us alone for a moment?” he asked the two other men in a quiet voice.
He needed to talk to Atsumu, as much as Atsumu needed to talk to him.
They needed to sort things out. For now and ever.
Hajime and Daichi looked at each other, then to the two men next and in front of them.
“Okay.”
Releasing his embrace, Hajime kissed Tooru gently on his temple and just squeezed his hand a bit, as for encouraging.
Leaving the room with Daichi, he asked the officer if they should grab a coffee together - it would take some time.
So they first told the nurses that Tooru had woken up, but was for now in a serious talk with a colleague from the police and that they please shouldn't interrupt them.
Of course the staff wasn't so fond of alterating the pathway, but...okay. As an exception. Because they knew how hard it had been the whole time.
“What...are the possibilities for Tooru? What had Atsumu arrested him for, anyway?” Hajime wanted to know, when they were about to go to the vending machines at the end of the corridor. Daichi glanced over, gave a second thought, and then replied calmly.
“He arrested him because he shot at an unarmed man. Apparently. And for that, he took a policeman’s gun. But this isn’t the only reason. Oikawa had been arrested before, when you had been in isolation. We had found some of his fingertips on the letter bomb that was delivered to the hospital. But there wasn't any real evidence. Not to be mentioned, that Oikawa was meeting Mori, when you opened that letter” Daichi explained, noticing Hajime’s confused and shocked look.
“Probably you didn’t know anything, but that was what happened. And Atsumu was willing to arrest him because of four years ago. That’s why...he probably was pushed by those feelings.”
Hajime was still staring at the police officer and swallowed hard.
"Wait...his fingerprints?! But that...if you don't have evidence that it was actually Tooru, it isn't a problem, right? And...the unarmed man was Mori? So he wasn't unarmed at all, right? Having a sniper behind his back? So isn’t this something like a possibility? At least for a milde penalty?“
“We’ll make anything possible, but...the last word is the judge's one...” Daichi sighed.
Hajime nodded in concern.
"I know you do...please...I know he won’t go out of court without any penalty but..." he lowers his gaze, "I work for justice. And I don’t want any privilege or exception, but...I hope..."
Tooru had suffered enough. With everything.
He just wanted to have a normal life with him.
"I want to give Tooru a stable life. I think...there are so many things which he hasn’t get to know yet. The way he behaves, the way he acts...I’ve seen so many sides of Tooru. I want him to lead a normal life, finally. Not on the edge, not with murders, not with self-sabotage. At least not the whole time..."
Daichi replied with a little hum and then they arrived at the vending machine. He took out his wallet to get some coins.
"I know...and I really wish for that too. I've seen a lot of Oikawa's sides too...but I've never seen him that happy like he is with you."
Hajime didn't say anything and also fumbled for some coins in his pants' pockets, but Daichi smiled and told him that it was his turn now, and so he put some coins in the machine and went for two black coffees.
*
"Atsumu...well..."
It should be easier since they were alone, right?
But the pressure between them just increased and Tooru felt like he got on short on breathing again. Just like the moment in jail, before he lost consciousness.
“Can I...sit down?” Atsumu pointed out to the chair, and waited for his agreement and then took the chair and sat down in some polite distance.
Thinking about how to start, Atsumu decided to go first with the most important thing.
“I’m glad you’re awake.”
He looked up with some kind of nervousness. God, since he had met Hajime, he had also get used to that strange feeling of anxiousness, that he had always put aside successfully.
“I mean, not because of Hajime. Not only. But...for you. It shocked me when I came to see you and you laid on the floor. So...yeah, I’m glad" he mumbled almost inaudibly.
Tooru nodded slightly and the first thing he noticed was that it didn't suit Atsumu to feel guilty about something. The second was that the other detective really meant it.
“Thank you. If it weren’t for you, maybe it would have been too late for me” Tooru said sincerely.
The poison would have had more effect on him, if it hadn't been for Atsumu who brought him right away to the hospital.
“You don’t have to apologize, nor rethink anything. If I deserve that, then let it be. We both know that I made a mistake, and...” Tooru paused, lowering his gaze a little.
“You don’t have any idea of how much I wanted to die four years ago, or just rot in jail. I can’t forgive myself for what happened back then, and I’ve always understood why you hate me so much. I took Heiji from you, and now...I took Hajime. I noticed how you look at him, how you care for him, and I’m just glad you did so, even when I was here all unconscious” pausing, he looked up into Atsumu’s eyes and smiled a little.
“Just arrest me, detective Miya. Don’t do it for Hajime, nor for me. Do it for the justice we had always worked for, if you believe that it’s the right thing.”
Atsumu crossed his arms in front of his chest. Looking aside again, as Tooru talked about Hajime, feeling all uncovered.
Was he so obvious? Was he so obvious with his feelings? Why was he feeling so...disarmed now?
"How should I not...? I told him that I still care for him, even if he won't choose me" Atsumu then inhaled, looking up to the ceiling, "You know...I always thought that you’re such an asshole who didn’t regret anything. And when you asked Hajime for that case, I so wanted to shoot you myself. But...Hajime chose this. Not you. It was his own decision and I respect that. And moreover, what is about the case itself...even if we would have been super cautious...Mori would still have found a way. He always had. It isn’t your fault he aimed for you."
Atsumu looked down to Tooru again.
"And I won’t act out of pity here. You’re alrighty arrested, but the trial will take place soon. Still...if it wasn’t for you, we had much more murders and therefore victims, which wouldn’t be detected at all. You know about Mori's network. We wouldn't have got to his filthy colleagues without you. That is fact, and...between you and me...right now, I think...I was also talking to Hajime about it a while ago. I think you already suffered more than anyone else here. And even if I don’t know how you've been feeling in the past, that's something I really didn’t want to accept. That you're so fully aware of what you had done and so fully regretting all of it..."
That was a surprise. Tooru needed some time to get it right. Needed some time to accept that also his own point of view about Atsumu had changed bit by bit.
“I think...you’re a good detective after all, Atsumu” Tooru admitted with a little smile.
Everything now...seemed settled down. That was a relief.
Yes, he would be judged when he had recovered, but somehow...it wasn't that bad anymore. Of course, once he woke up, Tooru had hoped that he would live his life with Hajime - kissing, cuddling, staring at the stars, cooking together, making love, having children.
The typical things one would wish for when he found the love of his life. Nothing more.
He still wished for that, but he had to accept his penalty.
"Shit. Don’t make me a compliment!" Atsumu snarled, sighing. He then stood up.
"I don’t want to make your life harder, Oikawa. And even if you say so, talking about justice and everything, I also don’t want Hajime to suffer. So...we have to see what we can do for you. And I guess, until the trial, you have to stay in hospital because of medical treatment and everything."
So no jail cell until then.
"Still, you will be watched, of course. So don’t you dare trying to get out of the window to meet your fiancé in secret or so" he tried to sound cooler again.
“You can help me sneak out! You know I hate hospitals” Tooru joked, smirking.
But then someone knocked on the door and a doctor and the nurse in charge came in. They had to examine him after waking up.
Atsumu took that as a finish line for now, and was seen off.
*
Tooru was getting better and better every single day now. He was out of danger.
Hajime visited him everyday, whenever he could and when he had finished his work. With Tooru all awake, he was able to focus a bit more and he also took the chance to get his apartment clean and everything. Normality hit him again.
One day, Hajime was a bit late, and Tooru just thought that he maybe had a tough day at work and preferred to go home and rest. Or maybe...he hadn't finished work yet?
It was fine, after all he came for him everyday, right?
He sent him a message, but Hajime didn't reply. Not even after half an hour.
It was fine, really.
Tooru knitted his eyebrows, then decided to close his eyes. Maybe he would be able to see Hajime in his dreams at least.
Being discharged from the hospital was a good thing, and still he came there - not only for his work, but also for visiting Tooru. And he had told him that Yui had come back to work today too.
They hadn't seen each other since that letter bomb, there was still a lot to do, and so it was only natural that he was busy, right?
*
Hajime was not only getting back to work and recapitulating stuff with his female colleague who was finally back, but he was also asked to give some lectures to the students of the first semesters of medicine too.
Looking at his watch, he then took his cup of coffee and drank a sip.
“I’m glad you’re ok” Yui said, facing him directly, when they were sitting at the desk, “That...was even worse than the last time...”
“Yeah...I’m still relieved that Akane wasn't too involved in it.”
Yui nodded. Staying in silence for a moment, she held her cup with both hands and stared down at the black liquid.
Then she hesitantly said, “And...how is it going? With Oikawa-san, I mean?”
Hajime nearly choked and looked at the ceiling, averting eye-contact at all.
Does she really want to have an answer?
He didn't want to be insensitive.
“Good, actually.”
“That’s great.”
Another moment of silence.
“Listen, I needed the time to deal with it” Yui then admitted with a weak smile, “and it’s still hard for me, I can't deny it. So...I thought of going for an internship to another prefecture. Maybe one of our partners. Getting...some distance. I definitively want to come back and work here, but for now...I guess I’m still not ready to focus” she looked up, “I really like you and I don’t want our relationship as colleagues to be affected.”
Colleagues. Not friends anymore.
Hajime swallowed and nodded in silent agreement.
“When do you want to...”
“Next month so...in two weeks. I already applied but maybe I need a recommendation by someone.”
“I write you that one. Don’t worry.”
“Thank you.”
Yui looked at Hajime’s hand, as she didn't know where else to look at. She noticed the ring.
“Will I still be invited? To...your wedding?” she asked quietly, somehow a bit absent-minded.
“Of course.”
*
After that long needed talk, Hajime went to the upper floors, visiting Tooru.
He just got a little later again, because of buying some flowers from the local shop close to the clinic.
Exhaling and trying to get rid of his thoughts of Yui, he focused on the present in front of him and knocked on the door with the small bouquet in his hand.
Stepping in quietly, he gave a smile and greeted.
“Sorry, today was so nuts-” but paused as he saw that Tooru was sleeping.
Cute...why was Tooru always looking so innocently cute?
So, he first put the flowers in a vase on the nightstand, and took the chair as quietly as possible to the bedside.
Sitting down, he watched Tooru for a while, but then took his hand and rubbed it lightly.
“Sleepyhead, wake up~” Hajime leaned forward and gave him a light kiss on the temple.
Tooru didn't move an inch. He was breathing steadily, no flinch, no reaction at all.
Hajime tried to wake up him again, softly, but then the worries took over.
“Hey, come on. Keep your sleep for later” he tried again, kissing him softly under the earlobe, that one spot that should always work...but it didn't.
Hajime distanced himself a bit, panic spread through his body. His heart started racing and he felt his own breath flat and out of rhythm.
“T-Tooru?!” Hajime cracked a smile, “Come on! Tooru?!”
He shook him slightly on his shoulder, now standing right by his side.
“I love it when you say my name~” Tooru suddenly smiled, with his eyes still closed.
Hearing suddenly Tooru’s voice, Hajime flinched so hard that he stumbled against the nightstand, making the vase fall out of balance and grabbing it in the last second by his reflexes. Still, water was spilled and dripped down the furniture, and a single flower had fallen out of the vase.
Hajime swore, and for a few seconds, he didn't say anything. He just...stared at the mess. His jaw muscles trembled and his whole body tensed. Anger.
Tooru blinked, irritated at first.
He had just wanted to play a bit around. Like he always did? But Hajime's expression...
"H-Haji-"
“I go get some...bigger tissues or something” Hajime cut him off, maybe not on purpose.
With calm but firm steps, not even looking back at Tooru who called out to him, Hajime left the room, closing the door quietly.
Outside...he closed his eyes, rubbing the inner corners with his fingertips until it hurt.
Breathe. Everything is ok. Just breathe.
He was angry. Fucking angry. And still a bit scared.
“I-Iwaizumi-san, are you alright?” a nurse asked him, as she had seen him coming right out of the room again, when he had just got in, and now was standing there in...pain?
“Y-yeah. Do you...have some bigger tissues? We...I have spilled some water. The flowers” he stammered. Not convincing at all. He knew that.
Still, the nurse only nodded, and went to the facility room, giving Hajime a bundle.
“Thanks.”
He went back in, after taking a breath one more time.
And then...he glanced at Tooru. His eyes still worried with suppressed anger and fear. At least Hajime's temper was calmer.
Tooru was still laying on his hospital bed, but his back was facing Hajime. He didn't dare to see him.
After Hajime had left, he had understood. He felt guilty for his carefree behaviour.
Yes, he had been a bit angry at him, because he came so late. And he had just wanted to tease him therefore, but it had been an awful joke. Still...seeing Hajime leave...that was even worse than that joke.
Pressing the little daffodil that had fallen down on the floor before right in his palms, Tooru stayed quiet.
Hajime stayed silent too, bending down next to the nightstand and beginning to wipe off the water from the floor.
“Please don’t do this again in the near future” Hajime finally said, calm and collected.
After he was finished, he stood up again, throwing the used wet tissues into the bin.
“I was late because I had to talk to Yui. She returned to work and...well we haven’t talked since...since I had dumped her and she stayed at home. I should've at least written to you, that's right. I’m sorry” he explained, while arranging the flowers in the vase, looking at them.
Oikawa stayed silent for a few moments, as he didn't want to talk. Pride. Stubbornness. Whatever it was.
But then, looking at the daffodil he was holding, he spoke up.
“You know I hate hospitals” his voice trembled a bit.
Fuck, he didn't want his voice to tremble. But crying silently, multiple tears flowing down his cheeks, being still in control of the sobs, that was Tooru's skill. He was a silent crier. Still, his voice didn't listen to him.
“I know...that’s why I wanted to make it a bit more colourful for you at least...” Hajime replied, stubbornly, as he had already apologised.
Glancing at Tooru's back, then back to the nightstand, he suddenly blinked: where was that one daffodil?
Did I throw it away? No...
Irritated, he forced his mind to the most important thing there: Tooru.
He had sat so many hours besides Tooru’s bed, without getting any reply, any talk. And having that now again, because of some stupid fight...he definitely didn't want that. He wanted Tooru to talk to him to look at him, to smile at him.
Silence was the last thing Hajime could bear anymore.
“Can I sit down?” he asked hesitantly, because he didn't know how to handle Tooru in that kind of situation yet.
They hadn't had a couple fight yet.
Tooru also only nodded, not knowing what was right or wrong to do. Still holding onto that daffodil.
Maybe...yeah, maybe one day...Hajime’s love for him would fade. Fade like flowers do, like that daffodil would one day.
Maybe Hajime...wouldn’t be able to stand him anymore, and would get tired of him. Like he was now. Annoyed. Angry with him.
Tooru closed his eyes, and the tears continued streaming down his cheeks, soaking the sheets.
He couldn't imagine it. He didn't even want to.
Hajime, being tired of him...
So Hajime sat down. But not on the chair. Sitting down on the mattress, as Tooru unwillingly gave him more space because he was rolled over to the side, Hajime tried to think of something.
Reaching with his hand carefully to Tooru’s head, he started to stroke his hair carefully. Just like that.
Only trying to show him, that he was concerned about him. Even if they fought.
“Tooru...you’re crying, aren’t you?” the forensic doctor asked very quietly, as they stayed in silence for a while.
“No...I’m fine” Tooru lied, trying to sound convincing, but it was difficult when he felt Hajime’s gentle touch. His fingers through his hair.
He didn't deserve that. He so fucking didn't deserve that, after having frightened him like that.
“S-stop...” Tooru just mumbled, tightening his grip on the daffodil.
Hajime exhaled noisily. Pausing in his strokes.
Tooru...argh!
He was near bursting, because keeping his temper down had always been a problem for him. And even though he had learned how to manage it...Tooru was too skilled in making him livid.
“So you...wanna stop me touching you?” Hajime waited for a reply, before going for option A or B.
Well, in the end it was only A, but still...he needed Tooru to speak to him. No silent treatment anymore.
Tooru didn't reply at first, but then he knew he couldn't stay silent forever, because he felt Hajime’s eyes on him.
And of course he didn't want Hajime to stop.
“You’re angry with me...” Tooru only mumbled.
Hajime chewed on his bottom lip to that answer.
“Of course I am!” he replied with his usual moody undertone he hadn't used for quite a while, when it came to Tooru.
Taking his hand back, Hajime kicked his shoes off, laying down next to Tooru directly and spooning him up. He wrapped his arms around him, pulling his boyfriend to his chest.
“Bakakawa” he mumbled and held him tightly, “Do you think this will stop me from showing you affection? Or to care for you?”
Embracing Tooru like that, Hajime could feel that the other kept something in his hands, clenching it as if his life depended on it.
“I-I...” Tooru sais, but then started sobbing loudly.
“I thought Iwa-chan...stopped loving me...” he whispered, crying out loudly then.
God, he couldn’t stop. He felt Hajime’s warmth, his hands closing around him, and the only thing he did to that wonderful man was...hurting him! Making him angry! Worry him!
“Oi...I’d never...?!”
Hajime sat up a bit, he wanted to talk back, wanted to reassure and everything, but...the way Tooru was crying now, so heart wrenchingly...he...was really...
...scared?!
As he was now in a more upright posture, Hajime saw a yellow petal shining through the gaps of Tooru’s hands.
He held on so much to this tiny thing...
“Tooru...” Hajime started again, now much quieter, resting his hand on the detective's, “Let me hold you, okay?”
He tried to turn his boyfriend carefully on the shoulders to him, wanting to hold him properly, to face him.
"You’re...really scared, uh?”
Giving it some effort, the forensic doctor then used the impulse and pulled Tooru into his arms again, but carefully, so the small flower wouldn't be squeezed.
It was something Hajime realised now for the first time.
He’s so insecure if it comes to feelings...as they are all just impulsive and he could be...replaced every minute.
“Tooru...I...I can’t tell you how relationships work but...it’s normal to be upset or angry or disappointed from time to time. It’s okay because you are you, and I am me. This will happen from time to time...but this doesn’t mean that I'll stop loving you! And...I want to show you that this is okay, that we'll make up, and that it’ll be all okay again...”
Stroking Tooru’s hair again, he lowered his head a bit more.
“The only thing I know is...that relationships are hard work. And that it’s worth it, because you're worth it. I won’t leave you...” Hajime was whispering now, trying to comfort his love as best as he could.
And Tooru let Hajime hold him, his head resting on Hajime’s chest. Hearing his heartbeat, so calm and comforting.
Hajime...knew him. He...understood everything.
Tooru had never been loved, not even by his parents who had preferred to abandon him and leave him in an orphanage.
Yeah, Tooru hadn't even known what love was, before he met Hajime.
He didn't even comprehend how those feelings worked, and that was why he feared that Hajime would become one day tired of him and would resent him. Because that was like he had experienced it. Being rejected again and again.
And because he didn't know how a relationship could work, he had never been able to accept Heiji’s feelings. He hadn't felt the same and it had been scary at all, that someone was loving him.
Until he met Hajime, Tooru had believed that he didn't need someone by his side in his life.
But now...there was him.
Hajime.
“I-I’m so sorry...please...forgive me for what...I did to you...” Tooru whispered after minutes of crying.
Caressing and comforting Tooru, Hajime shoved his leg between the other’s, making them snuggle up more, as if he wanted to make sure that nothing could get in-between.
“Just a sorry is enough” he whispered back, “As I said...I should have written to you. I’m...not used to it. Having someone waiting for me. And I think I have to consider it from now on, you know...”
Hajime loved him, he had always cared for him. Always.
Tooru wasn’t the perfect boyfriend to his too perfect Hajime.
And it was frustrating.
“Your love for me...will fade one day...it’s better...if you stop now. You don’t deserve to wait for me...I’ll be punished and...and end up in jail for some time anyway! I don’t want you to wait for me...you...you always deserved better! You still do...you deserve so much better...than...me...”
He would have been happy with Hajime, maybe, if he hadn't ruined everything.
If he would have avoided getting arrested for unreasonable behaviour.
If he had been normal.
And now...only Heaven knew what kind of punishment the judge would give him. How long he would be out of sight again.
Yes, it seemed like Oikawa Tooru had never been lucky in his life.
His only luck was Iwaizumi Hajime and his love for him.
But this...would end soon.
Hajime’s eyebrows knitted.
“Hey. I’m a grown-up man and I know exactly what I want and what I go for. And if I have to visit you in jail, I’ll do. I'll call you every day and so.”
Stopping with the stroking, he tried to lift Tooru’s head by his cheek, so that he had to look at him.
“And I said: I. Won’t. Leave. You.”
Staring him in the eye, Hajime then lowered his gaze as he continued.
“Still...it would help me to know...why you're so terrified that you’re not worth it to be loved. Who made you feel like that in the first place? You’re so scared...what can I do to make you feel otherwise? How can I make you feel less insecure?”
“I...” Tooru started with hesitation.
His lips wanted to pour everything out, but his heart was still a bit unsettled. Because of people who had messed with him before. Because he was scared, yes.
But...but it was Hajime, right? He would listen to him. He wouldn't laugh at him.
“I’m...I’m an orphan. I grew up in an orphanage, no one has ever loved me...and that's why I don’t even know how love works. That’s why...I’m afraid that you one day will stop...” Tooru explained sadly.
Word by word sunk in Hajime's own heart. Suddenly...everything made sense to him. That insecurity, that act of putting up a strong act, the sometimes wrong behaviour amongst others.
“I’m sorry” Hajime whispered sincerely, “That...must have been hard.”
Hajime's mom might have committed suicide, but he knew that she had loved him. Despite his dad who had just left them, he had never felt unloved.
“And...so, you lived all on your own up to today, right?”
Tooru slightly nodded and it broke Hajime’s heart to hear that.
A child should be loved, not...given away or having to live without parents or...whatever had caused that. He didn't want to dig into it too deep.
“But still...you’re a very caring person” Hajime went on, now caressing Tooru's soft locks again, “You’re still...capable of loving. You already do. And you do well” Hajime smirked, “I mean...I feel really loved by you, and I wouldn’t say so if I wasn't. Or because of having my head in the clouds or so...”
Love...that's right. He loved Hajime. That was something he was able to do. With all his heart, body and soul.
“I just...” Tooru hid his face in Hajime’s chest, as the last parts of his angst dwelled up, “I just love you...and I’d die for you, I just know this. I can't tell you why, but I know...that I’ll love you until my last day...and I won’t ever leave you...I don’t want to, Hajime! I don’t want...to go to jail! And feel like being in the orphanage again...I don’t...!”
He was just...terrified. Terrified to leave Hajime, of being alone again.
Hajime exhaled slowly, feeling how much Tooru was searching his support.
“That’s also why you hate hospitals so much, right...?”
“I just...hate being alone. No one waiting for me. It’s always been like that. That’s why sometimes...I didn’t go back home, just wandering around the city...to not feel alone...” that was it. He finally said it.
“I can understand that” Hajime admitted, “So...that’s the reason, uh...”
They had definitely to talk to Ushijima and maybe, also once more to Daichi and Atsumu. He knew that this wasn't allowed, but maybe they could claim for something milde. Maybe it was possible for social working hours or so, instead of sitting in a prison cell.
“We'll do everything we can to avoid that” the forensic doctor said calmly.
Holding him tight in his arms, resting his hand now on the back of Tooru’s head, Hajime kept whispering into his love’s ear.
“I won’t let this happen so easily. I can’t promise...but I'll try, okay? We all will. Daichi...Ushijima...even Atsumu.”
Maybe they could also convince the judge with witnesses like Osamu or Akane, getting a positive impression of Tooru’s personality. Having a pre trial before, there could be chances.
Hajime then suggested.
“Shall...I stay here with you tonight?”
He didn't want to leave him alone, never wanted to, and right now even less...
As Hajime couldn't take Tooru home...it was the only thing he might be able to do. Tooru nodded, sniffling.
“It’ll be too much to ask, won’t it?” he looked at Hajime with a wry smile, but his hand was already taken and the other kissed the finger with the ring on it gently,.
“Well...first: not too much to ask. I'll stay. Just say so...whatever you wish for, tell me. I’m sometimes an absolute idiot and need a kick in the butt to understand. Even if I’m a forensic expert” Hajime returned the smile, “Also, tell me if there’s something bothering you. I’ll listen. I’ll always listen to you.”
Kissing Tooru's forehead now, the little smile became a proper one.
“Second...I hope that you’ll now have a place to rest. A home to return to. To feel safe. I’ll gladly offer you that, if you like...” Hajime mumbled, as he didn't want to put pressure on him or anything. They had never talked about moving in together.
“I just...want to love you till the day I die, Hajime...” Tooru replied sincerely, and then leaned in to kiss him.
“Then...please do. Just love me...” Hajime muttered, before carefully capturing his lips with all the love he he held, stroking Tooru’s back and just enjoying the feeling of being together. Carefully licking over the bottom lip, he whispered.
“Let me love you...every day...”
Hajime rolled on his back, his love now on top of him, so he let himself be lulled in by the comfortable weight of Tooru’s body. Something he had missed. His warmth. The sensation of feeling the other, feeling a tiny part of skin on skin, because their shirts had just exposed a bit of that.
“Today...tomorrow...in a year...in ten...or in thirty...”
“Forever...” Tooru agreed smiling, then deepening the kiss, just to feel Hajime’s warm tongue in his mouth, dancing with his own.
“I love you...” he whispered into the kiss when he had the chance.
“Me too...forever.”
Notes:
Yahooo how are y'all doing?!
What do you think it will happen from now on? Are all problems solved? Will they be able to live together, happily, again?
Until the next time, we thank you from the bottom of our hearts, your support really means a lot!!! <3
Chapter 20: Seconds
Summary:
"And you? What about you, Tooru? Do you think true love does exist?"
“I...” Tooru began, then he laughed, “Actually...we wished the same thing.”
“I wished for Iwa-chan to find his true love. Someone who could love him like he does. Someone who takes care of him. Someone...who will catch his interest, go at his pace, conquer his heart, and never leave him” Tooru spoke and looked into those marvelous olive-green eyes again.
“I wished for that. I wished for you to have what I could never have.”
Notes:
Warning: NSFW
Thank you for every comment of yours, we always love to read them!! So please feel free to let us know what do you think!
Enjoy this chapter ;P
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
It wasn't as hard as they thought, and the nurse also chuckled, when Hajime asked that question as she was about giving Tooru his medical treatment.
There was only that one infusion for the day, nothing else. He would be totally recovered soon.
“I guess, I’ll look for a second bed” she winked, when she left the room again, “But don’t do anything inappropriate!”
“Of course not!!” Hajime barked, totally blushing, and that made her laugh even more.
“It was just a joke.”
She came back with a second bed soon.
Having it shoved right next to Tooru’s, she gave them a sincere smile.
“You know, it’s great to see how much you’re concerned about your husband” she mistook the ring for that, “We have a lot of patients who haven’t got someone so caring like you. Guess, it’s the same the other way round, hm?!”
Silence.
She wished them a good night, leaving the room and closing the door behind her.
Hajime glanced over to Tooru, blinking.
“Why are you looking at me like that?" Tooru spoke in defense, "I just...happen to talk to her when she treats me, because she’s the only one I see around before you arrive...”
"W-what?! It wasn’t like- I didn’t mean to-?!" Hajime stammered and scratched his head, "That’s not...what was going on in my mind" he sat down, correcting his sentence of nonsense before, "It’s just...nice to see how kind they are and...we didn’t even have to ask."
The second bed - probably she had just waited for that question.
Trying to change the topic, asking if he should organise something proper to eat, something better than the hospital food, Hajime cleared his throat.
Enough with the embarrassing stuff!
“How do you even think you can cook something in here, now?” Tooru chuckled, because of Hajime’s seriousness, “And...you don’t really have to bring me food here, but...” Tooru smiled softly, still appreciating that the other wanted to care that much.
"Bakakawa! Of course it’s just take-away! I can’t do magic here!" the latter snarled and grumbled, more red than ever, but he got calm again and turned to Tooru directly, curious.
"...but what?" he blinked, unknowing and somehow...with a sheepish little smile himself.
“I kinda miss...milkbread” Tooru admitted with a slight blush, because it sounded so childish, and quickly averted eye-contact.
He was even pouting a bit. Like a kid who wanted something that he couldn't get.
Out of all options...
Hajime got closer and then...really blinked in surprise. So surprised, that he...had to chuckle. Chuckle more. Laugh.
Turning aside, because he knew he wasn't polite at all, cupping his mouth with his hand, he had to laugh even harder. Right from the bottom of his heart.
And because it felt so good. They hadn't had so much to laugh in the last weeks and like Tooru, whose emotions just had gone overboard - finally breaking free - it was Hajime now, who just couldn't stop because all of what layed inside him came out.
"T-Tooru...s-sorry...o-of course...I buy you some" he still laughed, his stomach already aching.
However, it wasn't only Hajime who broke out in laughter, but also Tooru himself, who jumped on.
Seeing Hajime smile and laugh like that, put him automatically in a uplift mood too.
“You...meanie!! I-I’m serious a-about milkbread!”
But yeah...seeing Hajime like that...
“The last time we laughed like this was at Noya’s, and you were drunk. Are you sure you’re not drunk, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa teased, wiping off the tears from the corner of his eyes.
"I know...I know..." Hajime tried to stand up for the second time, but he failed miserably and therefore just let himself fall back on the bed. That made it a bit better.
The pain in his abdominal muscles was released a bit. Inhaling deeply, he looked up to the ceiling, to Tooru, from upside-down.
Smirking now, remembering it very well. Remembering, that he had talked so much gibberish and had been so high of the alcohol.
"I am" he then replied with a grin and only a light chuckle, resting hands on his still hurting stomach.
“You know, Iwa-chan” Tooru said suddenly, staring at the ceiling too, “I want you to laugh everytime you can. Everytime you’re with me, I want to see your smile...and falling in love with you, again and again.”
Slowly glancing over to Hajime, his smile became more genuine.
Hajime kept watching him, and Tooru’s words made him feel warm right from his core. He reached with his arm over his head, until he found his love’s hand.
I'll make you so fall in love with me every single day.
That was what Hajime was promising to himself. But then...having those beautiful brown eyes looking at him, he was sure there was more, Tooru wanted to say.
“I’m sure you’ll be a good father, Hajime, whenever we’ll have kids. And I’ll be so proud of that.”
A light blush appeared on his face. Seconds after, when silence filled the air because Hajime didn't reply right away, he blushed even more, blinking away.
Hajime's eyes went wide, getting into contest who can show more red on his cheeks. He noticed how adorable Tooru was like this. Utterly embarrassed, but so damn cute.
His own heart started beating fast, realising the meaning behind all this.
Hajime suddenly sat up again, almost jumping, taking his future husband’s hand in his.
“All in!” he said abruptly, as if he was agreeing to some kind of deal.
Red as a tomato he still tried to face Tooru and had some bright sparkle in his eyes.
“Let’s do this! I mean...a family. Having kids!” he exclaimed, and a cute smirk curled up his lips, “I...really would love that” Hajime got a bit more calm and leaned in, so his whispered words could still be heard.
“Because I know...that you will love them as much as you love me, and it’s nothing more I could wish for, Tooru...”
Pausing, he cupped Tooru’s cheeks then, “And be ready for falling in love with me everyday. It could be exhausting” his eyebrows lifted a bit in amusement, but he meant every word he said...despite the last joke.
“I definitely will.”
Tooru’s heart melted. He cupped Hajime’s face in return and leaned in for a kiss, feeling the happiness.
“I’ll warn you, I’ll make them watch every single alien movie! They won’t become some Godzilla dinosaur fanatics like my oh-so-handsome-husband!” Tooru answered with a grin, but got serious again, “And...you’ll better pay attention, because you can fall harder for me you know? You’ve seen nothing of my flirting skills yet, just the basics!”
Feeling the warm fingertips on his flushed cheeks, Hajime looked at Tooru who gave him a challenging wink, but he was not to be defeated so fast.
"But...maybe we shouldn't manipulate them. I mean...of course they have to see the big Godzilla statue in Shinjuku! Out of question! Still..." he pauses, giving Tooru a cocked eyebrow, "Can you say that again? The husband part?"
Another teasing peek on the lips.
"So maybe...combine that sentence with your flirting. I'm curious~" and Hajime's voice went a bit low here, teasing Tooru for his own good too, "Maybe you can show me this, when I'm back with your beloved milkbread?"
Finally standing up from the bed, the forensic doctor stretched a bit and he turned his head over his shoulder, smiling at the other who seemed slightly startled now.
"Give me twenty minutes. Enough time to prepare yourself and your flirty skills."
“Oh, try me!” Tooru teased, not giving up, and so Hajime left.
Both having an exciting heart in their chests, beating too loud as they exactly knew that something good was about to happen.
So Tooru called his nurse, and asked her for some help.
He had a plan in mind. And if he was eager to do something, he wouldn't drop it at all.
So he asked her for some candles, small party lights, for some roses or flowers. Maybe from the one of the other patients who had been discharged and left them there.
When he got both, Tooru put some of the petals on Hajime’s bed and his own, setting the candles on the nightstand and table too.
Time to be more handsome than he already was!
Combing his hair and...just that, it was perfect.
But the outfit...yeah...
The patient's uniform wasn't the best. But, hey...he was Oikawa Tooru! He looked great in everything, right?
So...he only had to wait for him.
Getting back to the bed, he sat down and exhaled. Opening a bit the pyjama top, he smiled.
*
Hajime had hurried for the bakery, and he was there in no time, fortunately still punctual, as they had been about closing right now.
“Excuse me, do you still have some milkbread?” he asked politely when he stepped in, and the little old lady behind the counter nodded.
“Oh we have plenty! You know, we usually have sold them to that handsome young man, but he hasn’t come in for a while now” she wondered with concerned expression in her eyes, and before Hajime could stop himself, he grinned to both ears.
“Ah, my fiancé!”
It made her look in surprise and silence fell in.
So much silence, that he actually felt that he had revealed his thoughts too well, so he cleared his throat and blinked away. Rubbing his neck and blushing. But...if he felt so warm, so happy...he simply had to spread this feeling, giving it space.
“Then please, give me...um...how big are they? Ah, just give me four. He’s starving for them, anyway!”
"So, is he alright?" the old lady asked, while she was putting the milkbreads together into a bag.
“Yeah...he’s doing fine. He has been just very...busy recently.”
There was no need to worry her at all. Hajime didn't know how close both of them were, but if Tooru wanted to, he could tell her everything else later by himself. It was none of Hajime's business to decide whether to give more information or not.
Finishing, he was handed the bag and payed for it.
“Then take good care of each other! He's my favourite customer!”
“Ha...don’t make me jealous!” Hajime laughed and was somehow relieved that she took it so light-hearted.
He had never thought of coming outs, and he didn't think that it was necessary until he wanted to involve his closest friends. But that it could be that simple, was somehow really refreshing.
Bowing respectfully for a goodbye, he left the shop but didn't go back directly to the hospital.
Making another stop, he went to the Italian pasta shop next door and ordered a light meal for take away. So, after the promised 20 minutes, Hajime arrived at the hospital again and spoke to the nurse in charge of Tooru, if he could get a tray with plates and cutlery, and also two glasses. She chuckled, leaving him in the corridor, and returned with the requested items. Slightly irritated at why she was so amused, he thanked her and was waved off with a "Then enjoy your time together!"
Shaking his head, he stepped in Tooru's room - he couldn't knock, as he had his hands full now, and it was even a miracle how he managed to open the door with his elbow.
“I’m back...” was all Hajime managed to say, when his voice went quiet, noticing petals on the ground, right in front of him. Flowers?
The light wasn't switched on. At least not the big one, as there was some dimmed light, coming behind the corner. Not the bed light as well, as it was like dancing in its nuances.
Shoving the door closed with his butt, Hajime followed the trace with a puzzled look on his face.
Another petal. More petals. Much more. And...as he came round...he recognised that candles caused the light. Also small party lits on the nightstand. There were much more petals around the bed. In the bed and...Tooru...his appearance left Hajime speechless. So much, that he almost dropped the tray. He called himself mentally to get a grip again. It wasn't so easy.
Where should he look at first?
Perfect fluffy hair?!
Those brown eyes which captured him within a second?
The slightly parted lips, curled up to smile?
Or...his whole posture?
Tooru in general?!
Hajime’s heartbeat got suddenly all so fast and he tried to swallow down the lump of heat in his throat, but didn't succeed at all.
“I-I...was lucky w-with the bread?!”
Good start. Stuttering. Very good start.
Especially standing in front of the beds like an elementary student, too shy to go into the classroom.
He should put down the tray before it really dropped.
His hands trembled.
Tooru chuckled, seeing the mess he made out of Hajime, and watched his love who was putting down the things for their own safety.
Already such a mess...and the detective hadn't even begun with the real thing!
Standing up, he approached him, moving his hands to the collar of the forensic doctor's shirt, pretending to fix its arrangement.
“You know, you have such a beautiful skin, Hajime...” Tooru teased in his flirty voice, while his finger tips moved accidentally over the other's neck.
“And that expression of yours is really...captivating~” he continued, biting his bottom lip on purpose while looking at Hajime with a little smile.
The olive-green eyes observed every movement. Every touch. Observed how Tooru's lips moved delicately during the compliments he gave. Also observing, how Tooru's fingers slightly brushed his collarbone, as he redid the collar.
Hajime's whole stomach started with spreading butterflies, when the other went on, talking in that low tune, looking at him. He felt the warm breath against his lips. His skin tingling and his consciousness getting a bit dizzy.
"Y-yeah?!" was all Hajime managed to say with a hoarse voice, "Captivating...you say?" too hoarse.
And he also couldn't took his eyes off of his lover.
He noticed too late, that this was all about the flirting part Hajime had asked for, before.
Tooru smirked in satisfaction, as he gently pushed Hajime down to the mattress, sitting right next to him.
“You know, I’m very jealous of your beautiful eyes” Tooru admitted, muttering now, “They shine so bright that even the stars could fall for them!” and there was it, the sincere but too hot smile which made Hajime go all red on both cheeks.
“I don’t want to share my husband with anyone, though!” Tooru's hand traced down all along Hajime’s chest and abdomen in a slow pace.
Usually, it wouldn't have been so easy to get Hajime speechless that easily, but feeling all overwhelmed, he was just able to blink, fighting hard to keep up his composure...how?! If Tooru even goes for compliments like that?! Fuck it!
And his goddamn smile! Dangerous! Pretty, pretty dangerous!!
His fingertips even more...so much, that not only a shiver went up and down Hajime's spine, but he got literally chills.
"There’s...no one you have to share me with" Hajime finally replied quietly, as he could convince himself not to give in.
To withstand the charming attitude and that so bloody infatuating smile of his fiancé. Leaning in, Hajime brushed Tooru's cheek with his own, putting his hand on the other slim one on his body.
“Good” Tooru used the chance to whisper directly into the shorter male's ear, “Because there will remain nothing of you, after I've finished.”
Tooru hands landed on Hajime’s thigh, caressing it with slowely upward movements to his hips.
You don’t want to give up, uh?
He had to smile a little, because of Hajime’s stubborness, working so hard not to be tempted by him.
Can he read my mind or what?
Although Hajime didn't want to, his throat gave a good gulping sound and he was close to lose it.
Think of something. Something else! Relax! Like...doing laundry! I have to do laundry and house cleaning tomorrow!
It didn't help that his mind already gave him an image of Tooru doing that choire at home for him...of course, with a tight shirt which let his muscle play, and jeans which stretched around his butt, while he bent down to get the laundry out of the dryer, or...no!
Shut up, mind!!
His eyes focused Tooru’s long lashes, then his lips and...okay done.
His body was out of control.
His needs and lust were taking over.
And it just slipped almost inaudible Hajime's own lips.
“That’s what I wanna see, Tooru-chan.”
Provocative, because he had his pride - almost ruined, but it didn't matter! - and right after, something like a pleading came out when he exhaled.
“Do it...”
Tooru smirked, satisfied, because Hajime finally gave in, and was about closing the gap between them...when he stopped right before touching the other's lips with his own.
That nickname...Tooru-chan...it was cute...too cute in that cooing way of saying it, like Hajime did.
He opened his mouth slowly, ready to take in the waiting lips, but only touched them gently, stopping again. His eyes laid on Hajime, seeing his irritated reaction as he waited for the kiss which wasn't coming - so, Hajime even let out a little snarl - and Tooru continued to tease his love in every way possible. Brushing his lips over Hajime’s neck, from right under the earlobe and touching slightly the soft skin with the tip of his tongue, he inhaled his boyfriend's scent.
Mhm...he smelled good...Hajime smelled so good...
And it was mean torture for the latter. The forensic doctor had never thought that Tooru could be like that or...no, wrong...he knew he could be like that. Remembering the scene, when Tooru had wrapped his scarf around Hajime's neck. When they had been practising for their act as a fake married couple.
Tooru's tongue gave him goosebumps immediately, and Hajime was exhaling with some irregularity, unable to stay calm. His hand automatically reached for Tooru's perfect hair. Running through it lightly from the side, feeling the soft curls.
"Do you...wanna take the lead so bad today?“ he put it in a joke, as he noticed himself getting more sensitive to Tooru's teasing. How is body craved actually for more.
“Oh yes~” Tooru sang, kissing lightly Hajime's earlobe and taking it between his lips then for a second, before talking, "I want to hear you sing for me, actually...”
Then his hand wandered under Hajime’s shirt, touching the bare smooth skin all the way up, passing those hell-of-abs, Tooru could only hope to kiss later inch by inch. Right across the sternum and then turning left, to take care of the other's still soft nipple, teasing it. He could feel how it became harder right away, could feel the heat of his body and how strong his heart was beating against his chest, already. Good.
That was perfect.
Hitting Hajime's weak spot right away, which couldn't be hidden, the shorter male kept his eyes shut, trembling all over and giving a cute noise of pleasure.
"Mhm~“
Hajime‘s lips parted again, as he reacted to the light squeezing caused by Tooru's thumb and index, and he put his head automatically in the neck, giving Tooru more space to kiss or tease him - just as he would like to proceed.
"I won’t...so easily" he still tried to resist, but his body was already moving itself towards Tooru, yearning for more.
Being closer. Feeling more.
Hajime's hands rested on his love's waist now, slightly clenching round the fabric of the other's shirt.
“Your body is telling me the opposite, Haji-chan” Tooru whispered, pausing on Hajime’s neck, not moving his lips there, nor kissing him.
Just like that, breathing against Hajime's heated skin and teasing him to the fullest, he then licked over that spot and went the way back to Hajime’s cheek, leaving a soft, imperceptible kiss. Looking at his beautiful love’s eyes, then approaching his lips, he also licked slightly the corner of Hajime’s bottom lip.
Hajime wanted more. He wanted everything of him.
And as Oikawa Tooru was a master in teasing and sweet torture, he wouldn't give him what he wanted. Not yet.
“You want me...so bad, I can feel it...” Tooru muttered with a lewd smirk, his eyes sparkling, filled with love and lust.
Regular breathing was becoming a problem. His muscles were getting all tense.
And of course...Tooru was right.
How could he not? Wanting him...
And...was it like some kind of reward to get these little kisses, his cheeks being all caressed?
Or just another try to get him closer to the edge even more?
Another low groan left Hajime's throat.
Looking Tooru into his so seductive brown orbits, seeing the desire within, the thick atmosphere reached his mind, lulled Hajime in and let Tooru’s words went into a loop in his head:
There’ll be nothing left of you when I’m finished with you...I can wreck you here and now...
His flat breathing, his own expression of longing, his body in need of Tooru's touches, and touching Tooru's body of course, and also his jeans...Tooru could feel it. Everything.
"I won’t admit anything," Hajime swallowed hard, "But..."
And with that he paused, saying nothing more, but moving his hands a little more to Tooru's lower back, caressing and squeezing lightly his butt. The detective smirked, feeling the touches.
“Too bad...” faking his disappointment, Tooru leant in, nibbling softly on Hajime's earlobe now.
“I wanted to give you more but...if you say so...”
And did he actually want to stand up now?
“You don’t even let me finish my sentence!” Hajime's voice went on a strange tune, because Tooru had already turned him on so good and now - was he about to leave him like this? Cruel! Too cruel!!
So Hajime's grip automatically tightened around Tooru’s hips, so he couldn't get away at all.
“Well, too bad. I...wanted to offer you something, too...”
Nothing that would impress Tooru much, but at least he smirked back and put his hand on Hajime's neck, pulling him near.
“And what is it, my dear husband?”
Time to stand your ground! Even if he called you that!!
“I’d thought of...” Hajime broke off again and took Tooru’s hand now from his neck to give it a soft kiss right into his palm, “...fucking you hard...and maybe letting you staying on top of me...but you don’t want to do it anyway now, do you?” he teased back with a low tune.
Tooru stared at him, eyes slightly wide.
Got you.
He put on his poker face again, smiling.
“There’s not a single time I don’t want to do it with you, Hajime...” Tooru answered honestly, bringing the other's hand on his cheek, leaning in, then kissing his palm like Hajime had done before with his own.
Damn it, that answer made him blush!
“But...there are people who might hear us,” Hajime then said, referring to the hospital’s staff, not to forgot the policeman who had to watch the room as Tooru was still under arrest.
“Then...keep me and yourself quiet?” Tooru suggested, tracing Hajime's lips with his index now, still not making a move to get them really started there and Hajime couldn't help it, but finally spoke his mind with all the impatience he had.
“Gosh...Tooru, stop talking! You make me so wanna let my lips crush together with yours, so will you...just stop that damn teasing?! I’ll give you whatever you want, but hell, Tooru...kiss me already!”
He made it!
He pushed Hajime gently down on the mattress and kneeled above him.
“Not yet...!” Tooru smirked and bent down with a mischievous smile, brushing their cheeks together.
He kissed Hajime’s earlobe, then went down until he found his collarbone, and sucked on it gently, then a little harsher. Leaving some good to be seen marks under the quiet groan of the other. Licking over the irritated skin, Tooru then stopped and looked into his love’s eyes. Sighing a low “You’re not allowed to look this hot, geez...”
And then he finally kissed him, Hajime's lips responded roughly, not allowing him to tease him more, shoving his tongue right into the other's mouth. Tooru gasped, closing his eyes and cupping Hajime's cheeks with his hands to keep him as close as possible. Their tongues were fighting for dominance, twirling and dancing with each other, but in the end Tooru won, and for that moment it was all okay with the shorter male, who let every inch of himself be tasted.
Hajime's fingers ran through Tooru’s hair, making a little mess out of it, as he loved the feeling of the soft curls too much. Also, because he would be rewarded with a quiet moan, as he knew perfectly how much Tooru liked it to be caressed and even pampered a bit. He felt his lips swelling, because of all the non-gently kissing, but didn't regret it at all.
Releasing themselves from each other, gasping for air, their expression for each other was just so love drunk, begging for more.
"You’re...so damn...beautiful...” Hajime whispered, looking at him in fascination as if it was the first time he ever noticed that.
And maybe it was. The last time they had been able to do this was long ago and he had missed it. Had missed the affection, had missed Tooru's smile, his kisses, his touches, the heat between them...
A tiny smile curled up Tooru's lips, as he replied with a low “Look who’s talking.”
Because Hajime was so handsome, so hot, so gorgeous...
Hajime admired how Tooru's curls framed his face, with the almost golden reflection of the candles light. His perfect and skilled lips...and Hajime wasn't holding back now, pulling Tooru closer to him again. A more satisfied moan filled the air, going under during their next kisses. He traced down the way from his lover's neck to his back, feeling the familiar contours of his body underneath the clothes.
Tooru did the same, lowering his hands from the forensic doctor's cheeks and got to his shirt to unbotton it with slightly trembling fingertips. Exposing inch by inch and therefore, his bare chest. His toned body. God...his pectorals. And his hard nipples...
Hajime stayed silent. He didn't feel embarrassed, but he liked watching Tooru as he was exploring him.
The detective stared at him for a moment, and then leant in, tracing a path of kisses, leaving marks as well. Then going over to cover Hajime's nipples with his lips, licking them carefully, sucking on them, which made Hajime shut his eyes closed and moan in joy. Then even biting them slightly, that caused another, louder moan from deep down his throat.
God, his moans. They drove him crazy, making him want to do more.
Tooru felt the built up arousal, felt the anticipation about what was coming next, the impatience.
His hands went another level down, unbuckling Hajime's belt and then opened one botton, so he could unzip the pants. He felt the heat below his palm, the contours of the slightly throbbing cock, still waiting beneath the underwear for him.
Gosh, since the first time he had done something good for Hajime, his cock made him starve. Always making him hungry, wanting to give him that good thing again.
Removing the pants with a little help by the other male, Tooru lowered the boxers, licking over his lips and glancing down. Hajime flinched a bit when he was touched by Tooru's slightly cold fingertips but got used to it fast, when he felt the detective's whole palm around him.
Tooru crawled down a bit, having Hajime’s twitching and half-hardened cock still in hand, rubbing it gently.
“I’m going to give Iwachan so much pleasure...” Tooru muttered, and then was already on eye level with it, before he licked its tip slowly.
His eyes were focused on the other's face, who was watching him, stroking through his hair.
Making a good swirl with his tongue like someone would do with a delicious ice-cream, Tooru gave a short smile, averting eye-contact then, and taking him all in his wet and hot mouth.
Immediately, Hajime let out another moan, he couldn't stop himself when he felt how he was sucked up. And damn, he loved it when Tooru went on more harsh.
The marks on his skin, the biting on his nipples, and now how Tooru was working him out so harshly that he even felt a bit of pain.
He so damn loved Tooru’s treatments, they made his body set on fire.
Supporting himself on his arms he kept watching him, and all the unnecessary thoughts disappeared with a blow. Closing his eyes for a second again, moaning quietly Tooru's name, he then had to suppress them because they were just too loud.
"That’s...ah...that’s so good...j-just...like this..."
No, he couldn't continue like that. Hajime sank back on the bed, reaching with his hand for Tooru's hair, as he was driven more and more to his climax. And yes, he had missed it.
"Tooru...I’m...all yours" was all he managed to say in a hoarse voice, his one arm over his so red face, feeling drunk and like in a delir, as he would never forget that image of Tooru between his legs, doing him so good and enjoying it so much.
So much, that it didn't last long. Hajime didn't last long.
“T-Tooru...stop! I-”
Too late.
His face showed pure satisfaction, as his body released his climax, getting him over the edge. Being all accompanied by his love through that overwhelming feeling, everything just felt like heaven.
Tooru felt the throbbing and how the warm slick fluid filled his mouth. Without hesitation he swallowed every drop of it down, drinking Hajime up. Not letting one sip get away. He even licked him dry after, not leaving a trace of come on Hajime's cock at all. Removing himself carefully, as he knew exactly how oversensitive the other would be now, he lifted himself up. Looking at Hajime, who had slightly jiggly legs now, looking at him - and for Tooru he had never looked so hot before - all done and with still fast rising and falling chest, the detective put on a gentle smile, coming to eye-level again.
“And I’m all yours too...” Tooru finally replied quietly.
He kissed him tenderly now, not too harsh as he even felt Hajime's lips trembling a bit. For a short moment he feared that Hajime would found it disgusting, the taste of his own seed still on Tooru's lips and tongue, but he didn't seem to mind - maybe because he was still too high or maybe because he was still too turned on by his boyfriend. Maybe he actually just didn't mind.
Tooru stood up a bit, and sat in front of Hajime, opening his own legs a bit more. He was completely naked and exposed in front of his lover now.
“I want you to enjoy the show."
He knew what he was doing.
“Keep your eyes on me, Hajime" Tooru spoke quietly, smirking.
“Let's see, if the show is not that boring” Hajime joked with an excited blush on his face, smiling like a kid who couldn't wait for riding the roller coaster for the first time, "Entertain me, Tooru."
Tooru smiled, accepting the challenge, and then reached for the nightstand, opening the drawer and taking out some lube he had stolen from the infirmary, putting a good amount of it on his fingers.
Inhaling deeply, Tooru brushed his fingers carefully around his own tight hole, pushing a finger in, slowly. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to get used to the sensation, and then looked at Hajime in the eyes, not wanting to miss a single reaction.
"Tooru..." Hajime tried to reach him, "Let me help you."
He couldn't hold back, he couldn't just sit there, getting excited, while Tooru was touching himself like that. He was too sexy.
"You can't touch me" Tooru replied, pushing his boyfriend's arm away.
“W-what!?” Hajime said again, feeling irritated.
"Just enjoy this, Hajime" Tooru said, adding another finger and moaning louder now.
While Tooru kept his eyes locked with Hajime's, the latter couldn't help but staring shamelessly at Tooru's fingers and his pink hole. He wanted to feel his lover's walls around his own fingers, he wanted to stretch him himself. But it seemed Tooru wanted to torture him to the core.
Tooru was sure Hajime would have done a better job than he ever could do, he imagined Hajime's fingers inside of him instead. He tried to copy him the first time they had sex, scissoring and stretching properly.
"Hajime...Hajime..." was all Tooru could say, while adding a third finger, preparing himself properly for his love.
“I love you, Hajime...”
The forensic doctor couldn't hold back anymore, and took a hold of Tooru's wrist and fingers, pulling it away and leaving him achingly empty.
When Tooru was about to complain, Hajime wrapped his mouth around his fingers, licking and sucking all away. Tooru's heartbeat increased, his eyes filling up with lust.
The forensic doctor leaned in, kissing him passionately, pulling Tooru closer by the neck.
"I love you too...so much."
The detective straightened up, pushing Hajime back down on the hospital bed, and looking down at him.
“You said I'll take the lead tonight, don't look that surprised” Tooru smirked, as his boyfriend stared at him, blushing.
Swallowing and with heavily breathing, Hajime's eyes were on Tooru.
Perfect.
It was all Hajime was able to think, looking at every single part of his boyfriend. His bare and edgy shoulders. His pectorals and abdomen, not as toned as his own, but so damn sexy, he wanted to touch him. He wanted to break him.
Those strong thighs...and that hard cock which presented itself, crying out for Hajime's attention.
Looking slowly up again, Tooru's expression made him feel even more...thirsty.
Hajime licked his lips, as if they had gotten too dry.
"God...how much I love to look at you...and...you know how much I love him?!" a little lewd smirk showed on Tooru's lips, as he looked down at Hajime's thick and hard cock, teasing his boyfriend again.
“You better love me more than him” Hajime glared at him, smirking back.
Tooru placed himself on Hajime's lap and lifted up a bit, lining his entrance with the other's dick. Hajime lifted his hips a bit, whereas Tooru slided down, his widened and awaiting hole finally being filled up.
“You’re so hot...” Hajime whispered, a bit out of breath, as he heard the first loud moan from Tooru, when his cock was all in.
“Guess, that’s what I can do for you,” Tooru chuckled quietly, getting used to the feeling.
“It’s...okay...” Hajime muttered finally, looking up at Tooru, caressing his chest with his rough palms, “Show me, how much you love me.”
Hajime palpated his lover's chest, squeezing his nipples softly, as Tooru gave another more passionate but quieter moan.
“I want to hear you scream my name tonight...” Hajime said with a smirk, starting to thrust, moving his hips up a bit harder.
He knew how much Tooru liked it, being done hard. Even though he was still careful, he still showed him the passion he held within.
“You’re so warm, Tooru...you’re taking me so well...it’s so...aaahhh...so so good, Tooru...” Hajime mumbled all over, complimenting his love between all his grunts and moans.
Just how their bodies were slapping together, how he was inside of Tooru...Hajime couldn't ask for anything more. Being loved, just like that.
Making love...just with his man.
“Why are you so...infatuating....” Tooru groaned, as he moved up and down, increasing the pace.
Moving his hips around Hajime's cock, squeezing his own legs a bit, he gave Hajime a better angle to go deeper but also showed him his own weak spot, that made him cry in joy.
“God...H-Hajime...ahhh...please...”
But he didn't have to speak it out, as he already felt the hard thrusts which let him almost lose his mind.
Hajime pulled Tooru down with him, the brunette always on top of him. He squeezed Tooru's buttcheeks, slapping them a bit, and gaining loud and satisfied moans from his detective.
He sucked on Tooru's neck, leaving marks everywhere his lips found skin, his hands pulling Tooru's cheeks, to have better and deeper access on him.
He was merciless.
“Gosh...H-Haji...I want...I want you...to do me from behind...please...do me hard from behind...”
He wasn't even aware of how lewd his own voice sounded.
Silence filled the air and the movements got slower, even paused, Tooru opened his eyes, looking into Hajime's surprised ones.
“You...really want me to...?” Hajime's voice came out excited, and he couldn't be anything else than...happy.
“You don’t know...how much I wanted to do this too, Tooru...” Hajime smiled, kissing him.
He then pulled out slowly, turning Tooru around, who lifted his hips without being ask.
Showing Hajime his perfect butt-cheeks, his toned back...his head supported on the mattress. His eyes looking at him, waiting for the excitement to come.
“You’re...so beautiful...” Hajime exhaled with a groan, feeling so turned on by that picture in front of him.
He could see how much Tooru's brown eyes were begging him. How much his slightly throbbing hole was crying and waiting for him.
Kneeling behind him, Hajime thrusted in again, maybe too harshly, too excited. He could feel Tooru's body shaking, his walls tightening and loosening around his erected cock. Hearing his heartfully moan.
“What do you need, Tooru?” he whispered into Tooru's ear, as he shoved his hips back and forth in passion, and then stopping. Tooru's groans became whimpers.
“H-Hajimeee...” Tooru cried in pleasure, begging him.
“Say it, Tooru” Hajime whispered, thrusting in him again, harder, then slowed down a bit. Bending over, he rested his chin on Tooru's shoulder, leaving a kiss on his cheek, gently.
"Fuck...fuck me...come inside of me, Hajime!" Tooru moaned, as Hajime sucked his neck, leaving another mark.
“Come with me...” Hajime whispered suddenly, hitting hardly Tooru's weak spot, “Come with me, Tooru...”
His voice gave Tooru chills...his hot breath hit the detective's skin and gave him goosebumps.
“Ahhh!!” his eyes widened at first, as he felt his spot getting hit, and he saw stars when Hajime did that all over again.
“I...I do...” he groaned, getting his butt even more in position, as his love’s now totally drove him crazy.
“H-Hajime...I...ahh...!"
Tooru's passionate moans filled the air, when he felt how his climax got him. He tightened strong around the other’s cock, as he was so overwhelmed.
“Uhh...To...Tooru!!” Hajime groaned out, feeling all of the pleasure the detective's walls were giving him, holding his cock tight.
And then, just like that, he came with hard throbbing, painting those goddamn walls all white, filling Tooru with all the love he had for him. His thrusts became slower, pausing.
Staying bent over the other's back, gasping for air, they needed some minutes to calm down, until Hajime pulled out. Turning Tooru around carefully, he layed down with him, embracing him, holding him in his arms protectively.
He left a kiss on his cheek, forehead and nose, looking at him.
“You’re too beautiful, I can’t even describe it with proper words...” Hajime spoke quietly, caressing his cheek.
“I’m so...madly in love with you, Hajime...and I’ll always be...always, my husband...” touching Hajime’s nose with his, closing his eyes, their breathing had the same pace.
The detective’s legs felt shaky, his whole body was too, but he also felt so at ease. So satisfied. So...full of love. Looking into Hajime's green eyes now...a soft smile appeared on Tooru's lips.
"You're all I'd ever need...you’re all...I'd ever want. And...” tapping Hajime's nose with his, Tooru added a little more blushed again, “I love when you do me like this...”
Arms wrapping around his fiancé’s torso, Hajime inhaled Tooru’s stronger scent he had fallen so much for.
“I can’t tell how absolutely hot you are, taking the lead” he whispered, tracing the spine with his fingertips up and down, “I can’t wait to marry you. And also for the honeymoon."
With a mischievous smirk, he kissed softly Tooru's swollen lips.
The latter's eyes started sparkling at those words.
“Then I'll be...even hotter on our honeymoon, Iwachan...or maybe you will eat me up alive and...why not, I’ll sing a special song for you?” Tooru replied with a playful tune, replying to that kiss gently, until he pulled away again.
“I take this as a promise” Hajime smirked back, seeing the sparkling expression in the brown irises.
Well...he had to admit that he liked it more than just a bit. Especially...watching Tooru stretching himself for him, showing off in front of him.
Shit...did he have some kink or what?!
“But you are already my husband, Hajime. You always have been..." Hajime was distracted again and followed Tooru's lips to his hand, resting right over his heart.
“I still can’t believe that...we made it here. We've almost lost each other...but now we’re here, together. I’m holding you, you’re with me...and everything's so perfect, if it wasn’t for..." the words were stuck in Tooru's throat.
Yeah. The trial.
Hajime took over, cupping Tooru’s cheeks.
"We’re...the same age right? When is your birthday?"
That sudden question made Tooru sound pretty confused as he replied.
“20th July 1994...I’m 27 years old.”
Even his eyebrows knitted a bit. The forensic doctor had to suppress a slight chuckle, when he was asked for his.
"10th June" he said, and Tooru blinked in surprise.
He was the younger one of them!
"See!" was all Hajime said in conclusion, "You’ve never been in a world without me. I’ve always protected you and...I always will."
With a long look into the other's eyes, Hajime leant forward and kissed the detective, as protectively as he had said, on his forehead.
"Try to stay positive...I’m here for you. I always have been, I always will. I promise."
And he meant it.
Tooru's heart melt with Hajime’s words, as it was true: when he was born, Hajime had been already in this world. In his world.
“I want to say such cool words too...” Tooru smiled, on the verge of crying.
“But...you were born a month before me...so I wasn’t there for you. I can only promise you to be from now on. Until forever. I promise that, Hajime.”
He loved that man in front of him so much. The man who had saved him so many times, not only from dangerous cases, but from the darkness. He had saved him, and he loved him.
He had been giving him the love he had missed since he was born.
And nothing, absolutely nothing, could be a repay for that.
The only thing, Tooru could do...was giving his love.
Loving him more than anything.
Seeing the change in Tooru’s eyes was something really amazing.
It made Hajime's heart go fast and there was nothing he could do but smile at his love.
He slightly nodded.
"I know you do" he answered quietly and kissed the corner of Tooru's eye, right where he saw a little tear finding an escape.
"But you know what? You just came into my life like..." he was thinking for a few seconds, and then continued with a wide grin, "Like a shooting star. However, in comparison to that, you stay and...that’s so much better than just wishing on one. You actually made it real. My wish" the forensic doctor whispered, holding the other male now in his arms as he caressed Tooru's fluffy hair, his back, his neck...simply everything he could reach with his hands.
"I’ve never been so happy in my life before...with you..." he admitted, "Thanks for making my life so much better, Tooru."
“And...what was your wish?” Tooru asked curiously, looking up to him.
"My wish..." Hajime paused, gazing at his boyfriend's excited face waiting for an answer, "I wished for someone who...I could truly feel comfortable with...who I feel at home...who is my home."
With a smile, Hajime lowered his gaze and closed his eyes eventually.
"Feeling at home when I’m not there physically. Feeling loved. Just...like this. I asked myself...if it’s possible to find the real love...and guess what the answer is?"
Tooru shooked his head slightly as if he didn't know. Of course he knew the answer, he was blushing hard.
“What...what is it...?” Tooru still dared to ask, hiding his face in the crook of Hajime’s neck.
Feeling the brunette snuggling up, a light chuckle came over Hajime's lips, as he wrapped both arms around him.
"It is possible...as I found my real love" he started with a whisper into his lover's ear, "And you? What about you, Tooru? Do you think, true love does exist?" Hajime smirked, waiting for an answer.
“I...” Tooru began, then he laughed, “Actually...we wished the same thing.”
A surprise expression framed Hajime's face.
“I wished for Iwa-chan to find his true love. Someone who could love him like he does. Someone who takes care of him. Someone...who will catch his interest, go at his pace, conquer his heart, and never leave him” Tooru spoke and now looked into those marvelous olive-green eyes again.
“I wished for that. I wished for you to have what I could never have.”
"Double wish?" Hajime chuckled, "Then I guess..."
Taking Tooru’s hand in his, he kissed the knuckles one by one and his fingers too.
"...that I’ve found the right one who could give me all of that. I know I have my flaws and I’m not always easy to handle. Really, you’ll think so in the future too!" he added quickly as he noticed the parting lips in front of him, ready to talk back.
"But maybe...I can give you that. That love, that someone. I...really want to be that one for you, Tooru...and I’ll do everything to make this happen."
“You already are...” Tooru muttered sincerely, looking at him like Hajime was the most beautiful man in the world.
And for Tooru, Hajime clearly was.
“Do you know...how I fell in love with you?” he suddenly asked, but excited to tell Hajime the truth, waiting for his answer first. The forensic doctor pondered a bit for the reason...Tooru had said once, that he had fallen for him really quickly, but...why?
"Really...I don’t know" the shorter male cocked an eyebrow, "I wasn’t very nice due to your sharp tongue and bold appearance!"
Did he do something special? Anything?
Hajime really had no clue. So he shrugged, asking Tooru to tell him.
“Well, I wouldn't say that it was love at first sight, but I really, really was interested in you, somehow...” Tooru started with a little smile, looking down at their hands intertwined.
“You weren’t an ordinary man, that was my first thought. You were actually...sharp, clever, hardworking and...captivating. That’s why I kept in touch with you, that’s why I gave you a second chance, to get to know you better. When you brought me at your secret spot...and held my hand back...that was the moment I fell in love with you, I guess. Especially when we began to fake flirting at Osamu’s for that case. My heart couldn’t stop beating fast whenever I saw you from that day on, and whenever you were close to me. I was already so deeply in love with you, Hajime, but I haven't told you because I thought you were straight."
Yeah. That was true. Hajime had thought so too.
"And...because...I didn’t want to bring problems to you. I never thought...you would love me back. I never thought you would even like marry me...and spend your whole life with me. I’ve never thought that one day a person like you would love me, never leave me. I just love you...so, so much, Hajime...”
Tooru’s voice cracked at the end, but he said it.
He told him all the things he had always buried deep inside, all the things he felt for Hajime.
Yeah...it wasn't the typical love at first sight. It was a love that came slowly, tenderly, and never fading.
For Hajime, it was the same. Tooru had been an interested person himself too, although it had been hard at first. They hadn't liked each other and all...but who else could compete to a murder scene as a first meeting?
Listening to Tooru's words, it made Hajime's heart skip a beat and he felt so touched by now, so happy, so...fulfilled.
"Do you know...what you did to me on that evening, at Osamu's?. Of course, I wanted to get to know you better and everything, but...I couldn't deal with it. I couldn't fake it. And...I haven't realised it because...I never thought, that I actually would fall for a man" Hajime admitted very quietly, caressing Tooru's cheeks, "But you did pretty well. Making me fall for you..."
Tooru chuckled lightly on that.
"Looking at you always made me question myself and my choices. If you would like that spot I showed you. If you would like the same ramen bar. What you would say seeing my flat. What you would think of me, hearing me so drunk...hearing about my sorrows. Guess, my whole mind had just been revolving around you" Hajime smiled and leant in, "And...I'm so...I don't know. It just feels so damn right being with you, that I even could ask myself how I had lived before I met you."
Okay. Now Hajime couldn't stop crying.
The tears fell down because of so much.
So much love.
So much more for Tooru...
Tooru observed him attentively, cupping Hajime’s cheeks and kissing his nose and eyelids.
“Guess I’m a devil that corrupted you, huh?” Tooru joked with a grin.
“Hell of one!” Hajime agreed with a short laughter, and wiped the rest of his tears away.
“I’ve never been lucky in my life. Not once. But still, I found you” Tooru muttered, joining the concert of tears.
“Maybe...luck will be on your side from now on” Hajime pulled Tooru to his body, closing the gap between them and just giving him the warmth he deserved.
“I love you, Tooru...I’m so in love with you...and that won’t ever fade.”
Notes:
Lovey-dovey couple goals again! Hehe, two more chapters to go and then...we have to say goodbye to this story :'(
Saru speaking here (as I'm in charge of editing, reviewing and uploading the chapters XD), I'm not sure if I'll be able to edit and upload the last two chapters on August, so I fear you have to wait until September guys! I'm sorry, I'll try to make it possible, but I can't promise anything.
So wait for the last two chapters, okay!! Please be patient <3
We're grateful for all of your support!! See ya soon!
Chapter 21: Sentenced
Summary:
“I’ll come anywhere, if it means I’ll stay with you.”
“You will.”
Notes:
Yay we're back! Please enjoy this chapter, and thank you for staying with us so long in this journey!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The courtroom was filled with a number of police officers who actually wanted to see him in jail.
But there were also some of the kind ones Tooru had worked with, who hoped for the opposite.
The jury sat already in their seats, and the prosecutor had prepared himself on the one side of the large, old-fashioned room with wooden furniture and so on, whereas Ushijima and Tooru sat on the other side.
Hajime had visited him yesterday, but they weren't allowed to see each other right before the trial.
So, the forensic doctor, dressed in his formal suit, only glanced over to his love, trying to find out how was he feeling.
Tooru looked a bit worried, but whatever the judge would decide for him, he would take it. He had promised himself, as he wasn't worried for himself, but for Hajime. For leaving him alone, if the judge decided to condemn him.
But it was just then, when the judge entered the room and the audience was told to be silent now, so they could start the process.
The prosecution began with the opening statement. Next was Ushijima, giving his own response to that.
Of course nothing new for Tooru, Kuroo or Hajime. Just the obvious facts, the accusation and the objection to that by Tooru's attorney.
"Proceed with the testimony" the judge decided after Ushijima finished his statement, and the prosecution took over again.
"I call the detective Miya Atsumu."
The assistant at the end of the room nodded and went out for some seconds. Soon, he entered again with Atsumu.
After recording the personal data, the prosecution leaded on.
"Atsumu-san, would you please describe what happened on the 10th December on that building? How did you get there and most of all, tell us how Oikawa-san behaved and acted."
“Your honor, I arrived at the rooftop after Oikawa and Mori had already been there for a while" the blonde detective started, not even looking at Oikawa to his right, "Mori was threatening Oikawa and I pointed my gun at him, ordering not to move. Then, Oikawa got shot by a sniper nearby - hired by Mori - and we all know by medical papers that Oikawa Tooru was almost dying of that. He took my gun, yes, but for self-defense. To defend me too, to be precise, because the sniper would shoot again. Oikawa has made mistakes in the past but he's responsible, and I know for sure that he’s the last person here who wants a criminal to be dead. He prefers to arrest them. Giving them a proper punishment and not the easiest way to go out of life. So, Oikawa was just defending me and himself” Atsumu stated and after his speech ended, he dared to glance over to Tooru who smiled wryly, as he hadn't expected that.
The judge stayed expressionless, but not the prosecution, who knitted his eyebrows and looked down at the paper.
“By all respect, Detective Miya, I have to remind you that you were actually the one who arrested the defendant for taking your gun and shooting an unarmed man? As it is written down in your own witness report. And for interfering police work beforehand? Isn’t it right?”
Atsumu had to agree. It was right.
“So, furthermore, there has been a serious case back then, linked to the recent one. A case where the defendant had not only acted irresponsible, facing the recent culprit and serial killer, but also was suspected of taking drugs during the investigation process?”
“Objection” Ushijima spoke up now, “My honour, this is only a guess. There are no valid evidences that my client actually consumed drugs.”
The judge nodded and asked the prosecutor to continue only with the facts.
“Then at least, answer my question with words, detective Miya.”
“Yes, I did” Atsumu replied honestly, feeling a bit guilty but trying not to show it.
He knew well enough that his words could be used against Oikawa and would, if the prosecutor found it necessary to justify his own deductions.
“But I didn’t know a sniper was there. And that he might have tried to shoot at us again. And furthermore...” Miya said, looking at Daichi who had stood up from his chair and brought him a little plastic package.
“We found this on Mori’s coat” Atsumu explained, showing the gun in the bag and the single bullet in there.
“This time, he wasn’t unarmed at all and this gun...is the same that killed my colleague Nakamura Heiji, four years ago.”
Everyone’s eyes went wide - Tooru's, the prosecutor’s and even Hajime’s. That was more than unexpected but...not the bad kind of surprise. The prosecutor looked at the weapon.
“My honour, we have to accept this as an evidence for what happened in the past, but...this weapon was not announced before the trial. It isn't written down in the expected evidences for the process and I guess, neither is it for the defense? I don’t have any more questions.”
All eyes went to Ushijima, who seemed rather unimpressed, but for a second he had blinked.
That was right. If he had known about the weapon he could have announced it officially. Now, it was more like a cherry on the top. The question was, if the cherry was still bitter or sweet.
"Actually, that is an inconvenience" sighed the judge, "Why didn't you submit this weapon as a recent evidence?"
"Seriously?" Miya snapped and hissed, "Even if he had, it would have been too late due to the submission dates."
Else he would have done so, but yeah...impossible. The deadline had been too early, the examinations of the weapon, the registrations, and everything else...it had been a mess. And on the other side, even if Mori had had the gun with him: they didn't know. So, there was no justification for shooting at him.
“Defense?” the judge called now and looked up to Ushijima, who lifted himself from his chair.
“Detective Miya, please answer the following questions with an easy yes or no.”
“You had worked on the case Mori too, in the past?”
Miya agreed with a straight Yes.
“So you had also worked with my client?”
Another Yes.
“Would you have suggested that the serial killer was armed?”
And without waiting for the answer, he continued, “Please explain me the correct way of handling the situation, here. How would you have acted, if it would have been you instead of the my defendant? As a detective, there are some rules to follow, right?”
Now the prosecution tried to object, but is was outruled by Ushijima who explained that the guideline of handling such sitautions could give them an example of how appropriated Oikawa had acted.
“I would have stood up there, protecting my partner. And Oikawa did exactly that: he stood up for me, took my gun and protected me. And I’d do the same in that situation. A detective always has to defend himself and others and..." Atsumu turned to Oikawa and added, "Oikawa showed great courage and professionalism. The guideline says that we are allowed to shoot in case of danger. If it's predictable that our opposite is armed or is life-threatening. Mori is a well-known criminal. Considering his past actions, it wasn't a guess, but a sure prediction that he would have something up in his sleeve. And I'm sure that Oikawa had noticed the sniper even before I even had the chance.”
That was more than a good answer. Ushijima didn't even have to ask more questions. So Miya was released, and it was a good sign as well, that the prosecutor was not utterly happy about that outcome at all.
“I call in...Kowada Shinosuke.”
The vice chief of the police and the one who had never been so fond of Tooru. Checking the personal information again, the prosecutor got on fire.
“Kowada-san, you’ve been working with the defendant back then, right?”
“That is right.”
“Could you tell us something about his working style?”
Kowada, the grumpy man with his thin dark-grey hair, glanced in Tooru's direction and snorted lightly.
“Well...what should I say?" he began with a long exhale, "He’s effective, yes, but...rules are something he has never been fond of.”
“What do you mean?”
“He takes over, because he’s too self-centered, he doesn’t follow the right order of investigations and you know...sometimes sniffling on some substances, which he shouldn’t.”
“You mean drugs?”
“Yeah, I caught him once.”
Hajime pressed his lips together. Such an asshole. He grasped the chance to get his own little revenge there.
Ushijima spoke up again: “The last statement is irrelevant for the recent case!”
“His abuse of drugs could be relevant, if his actions actually mean, that he is to be accused of the letter bomb incident too. His fingerprints were on the envelope, remember?”
“Please proceed, prosecution.”
So he did. The prosecutor sat down with a satisfied smile.
“No questions.”
It wasn't a lie that Tooru had taken drugs from time to time in the past. The subjective opinion was nothing he could argue against.
“Any other witnesses from prosecution's side?”
There were two more witnesses, and before the defense could proceed with their own witnesses, a little break was to be hold after.
That kind of trial was more exhausting than Tooru had expected. His whole muscles were tense, his whole nerves alarmed.
As the judge called it a break for fifteen minutes, he exhaled and felt the pain in his whole body of being so anxious inside the whole time.
“Please, be prepared that I will call you myself in, if things go worse. I may need your own statement to convince the jury, okay?” Ushijima requested quietly, as they stood up to leave the room, catching some air.
Tooru nodded, but swallowed down a huge lump in his throat. Damn...it was something totally different, being the one who had to undergo the cross-examinations and not doing them! Especially, because he had the feeling that they would try everything to get him in jail.
Right now, Ushijima had been able to avert the wrong accusations and get focused on the case only, but Tooru's past was still lingering above their heads.
So stupid...he knew too well, that he shouldn't have given in to the drugs. He should've stayed more composed, should've obeyed the orders of his chief better. But it was just how he was.
His mind worked differently from others. His body was already ten steps ahead when he was told to stay calm.
And that was why he had felt so good working with...
“Tooru!” Hajime approached him, when they exchanged looks in the corridor, “Everything's...okay?”
Yes, why it had felt so good working with Hajime. Because he had understood him. His eagerness. He was able to catch up. To walk with him on the same level - not behind.
A wry smile came up the detective's lips and he lowered his gaze. Inhaling deeply, he only replied.
“Not quite.”
Looking up to him again, also to Kuroo and Akaashi now, all assembled there to support him, he chuckled, because he felt so helpless.
“Guess I’ll be condemned at the maximum now, only for some drugs that I haven't even taken for what they’re accusing me...”
Yeah, the only motif he had consumed them was when he had felt sad and sick. When he felt...guilty, for what he had done four years ago.
“They can’t condemn you for drugs abuse four years ago now. But that...is something we'll show the jury right now” Ushijima promised in his usual confident tone, not making space for any fear or anxiousness.
“They actually asked for the biggest asshole of the police...” Kuroo hissed, putting his hands in his pockets.
“Well, it’s their job to find anything which can help to convince the judge, right?” Akaashi added with a little shrug.
Hajime glanced from Tooru, with his shrunk shoulders, to Ushijima.
“Is it okay, if I...”
The attorney nodded.
And so the forensic doctor put his arms around his fiancé and held him close to his body.
“Don’t give up” he whispered into Tooru's ear, “We’re not done yet. We got your back, never forget! And I...I'll give them hell for making you suffer like that. Legit way of course.”
Stroking Tooru’s back, he kissed him lightly on his jaw angle.
That kiss gave him a sparkle of hope back. Yeah...it wasn't curtain call yet.
They still had the second part of the trial. And Ushijima had done his best so far. Maybe the odds weren't in Tooru's favour, but they weren't for the other side too.
There were still plenty chances to turn the tables.
"I know."
And after some more minutes, just holding and trying to encourage each other, they re-entered the court room and the trial proceeded.
“Now, are we finished with witnesses?” the judge asked after another hour of cross-examinations and a lot of questions.
Before the prosecutor could say anything, Ushijima stood up.
“There’s one last. Iwaizumi Hajime” Ushijima announced, calling the forensic doctor to witness for him.
Hajime swallowed and straightened his shoulders.
Okay...here we go.
He had been prepared, but right now he felt his hands sweating while we was walking to the witness stand. He looked at the audience, exchanged a quick look with Tooru.
“Iwaizumi-san, you happened to work with my client for more than a couple of cases. Actually, you happened to be his partner on one of these cases, am I right?” Ushijima asked, and Hajime replied in agreement to that.
“Your honor, I think this witness is absoluetely irrelevant” the prosecutor almost jumped, as he could already predict where that would lead to.
He had actually thought that Ushijima wouldn't do this, as the risk was high though. Of course, the prosecutor was aware of the relationship between the defendant and the witness.
“Let me decide what is relevant and what’s not” the judge replied a bit upset about the irregular objection, shutting him up, “Please go ahead, Ushijima-san.”
The attorney nodded, making a gesture that Hajime should now reply.
“That...is right" he agreed with words, “We’ve been working together since the last case, one and half a month ago. I’ve never met him before. My team and I were called to observe the crime scene.”
“How did my defendant behave as a partner at work?” Ushijima asked calmly.
The prosecutor spoke up again.
“Actually, the case he’s talking about ended up with the witness and the defendant beaten up, nearly to death. So the question should be: was that due to drugs abuse?”
"Objection!" Ushijma's voice sounded louder than necessary, but the judge hit the hammer down on the spot.
"Objection overruled! Please, be more precise from now on, Ushijima-san" the judge scolded the attorney, who bit lightely his bottom lip now.
"Please, answer the question, Iwaizumi-san."
“It was not due to drugs!” Hajime exclaimed, almost a little too loud, so he tried to calm down himself again before going on, “I have been working with many detectives, and might it be that he has his own methods, which aren’t always the most comfortable ones because they aren't in our checklists. What you're trying to say here, Mr Prosecutor, missed something: I decided myself to join him in that case. My team and I had several hard cases before, so it wasn’t the first.”
Hajime narrowed his eyes, “And as long as you don’t have a proof to accuse him of drugs abuse now, you just can believe what I say here: He. Has. Not. Taken. Any. Drugs.”
But the prosecutor seemed unimpressed.
“Well, as a forensic doctor I guess you would have noticed. But what about the fingertips on the letter bomb? He never told anyone about his meeting with the serial killer. He hadn't even told you about it, right?”
“Objection! This couldn’t be it" Ushijma was quick here, "My defendant was meeting Mori at the time the letter arrived at the hospital.”
“But he could have handed it in, so the letter would arrive anyway without his presence” the prosecutor spoke against.
"That's merely a suggestion!"
"It's a possibility, dear colleague!"
"Okay, calm down now!" the hammer of the judge was slammed down once again.
As the two professionals of law seemed to fight their own little fight, they wouldn't get anywhere from there, and so the judge focused on the case again.
“Say, Mr Iwaizumi" the prosecutor began, looking at the forensic doctor now, "We actually have the proof, that the defendant used to sniff drugs. Are you absolutely sure that he was sober?”
“As I told you, he hasn’t done it in my presence!" Hajime gave a little groan, "You said yourself, that I as a forensic doctor would have noticed the signs, if so? But if you don’t believe me, you can ask every other of the team who hasn’t work with him as much as I did and only watched from the sidelines. For your objective view.”
Although Hajime knew that this was exactly what the preosecutor wanted him to do - bursting out - he couldn't stop now, and that was the moment he digged his own grave, “So, ask your next question, even if we're not into cross-examination yet!”
The prosecutor smiled and looked over to the judge, who didn't seem to decline the ongoing questioning. So he waited a moment, only stared Hajime and then asked the most precarious question.
"Have you been in a relationship with him, Iwaizumi-san?”
Everyone fell silent.
Ushijima looked at Tooru, worried, whose eyes widened.
If this was going wrong now, Hajime’s witness would be pointless.
Tooru brought a finger to his ring instinctively, rubbing it.
Hajime himself, half-parted lips, thinking for a moment.
What should he answer? It isn't relevant, right? Their relationship status? Should he refuse to answer?
Ushijima tried for him, “Objection, as this is an irrelevant question. The relationship status of my defendant has nothing to do with the case.”
The prosecutor chuckled.
“Are you serious, Ushijima-san? It could be, if it means that your defendant needed a partner in crime to convince us that he isn’t a mere junkie.”
“How often should I tell you this?" Hajime snapped, "Blood samples would have proven that, wouldn’t they?!”
The judge took the hammer for a third time now.
“Please answer the question, Iwaizumi-san. Remember that you have to speak the truth.”
Yeah. The fucking truth.
Hajime’s left hand rested on the right one with the ring on.
“Our relationship didn't affect our investigations,” he replied in a strained voice, “Ask my colleagues and officer Sawamura, if you want. We worked as the professionals we are."
“So, it is a yes” the prosecutor smiled, then glanced at the judge, “I have no more questions, your honor” he said and sat down again.
“Any objection?" the judge nodded to Ushijima, "If not, we can go over to write the sentence.”
But it wasn't Ushijima who spoke up now. Unexpectedly, Tooru lifted himself from his chair.
“Your honor, Hajime has nothing to do with this!” Oikawa said frankly.
“Defendants can’t speak in a trial as long-" the prosecutor tried, but the judge raised a hand to stop him, and let the detective go on.
“He doesn’t even know how I used to live before meeting me, neither four years ago” Tooru continued, not even looking at Hajime who was simply speechless.
He couldn't look at him, as it would startle him, as he knew that Hajime would tell him that this wasn't right only by his look. That he shouldn't take the blame, when they were trying so hard to help him not to end up in jail.
“I was kicked out of the police, but I still continued doing my work as a private detective. I take all responsibilities here!" Tooru's voice trembled a bit, but also echoed through the big court room, "I take responsibility for taking drugs in the past! I take responsibility that I have acted too carefree, taking Hajime's life into danger, taking detective Miya’s gun, shooting at that criminal, even if it was for self-defense and for protecting Miya himself! But Hajime didn't know a thing about that, and he’s not lying!"
He paused for a moment, giving his following words a second thought and then exhaled.
"So..." Tooru spoke more quietly now, but still audible, "If I will be condemned, I’ll accept that, your honor. But I have no regrets, because I haven't done anything what I'm accused of here, and I’m not guilty.”
Sincerity spoke through his eyes and Tooru's posture became once more the proud one of the detective he was. However, right now, no arrogance was shown. No cover up, no cockyness. That was the real and honest Oikawa Tooru who was speaking.
He blinked away, turning to face Hajime, looking at him with a soft expression in his brown irises and a tender and sad smile on his lips.
“Hajime...I love you. So much, Hajime. Don’t forget me.”
His composure cracked and a tear was about to escape his eye, so Tooru turned to the judge again and lowered his head, a sign of respect, before he sat down again, looking at his feet.
Hajime's heart hurt. With each spoken word by Tooru.
Even now, Tooru was trying to protect him, he was trying to defend his honour...and Hajime himself could do nothing at all?
Clenching his hands to fists, he lowered his gaze too. How...should they win a pointless fight like this?
“Iwaizumi-san, I have a question” the judge suddenly said, and Hajime looked up again, “Did you know the risks of getting involved in that case?”
“Y-Yes...”
“And did you know about the tragedy happened to the defendant’s partner, Nakamura Heiji?”
“Yes.”
“And still, you agreed to help him? Why so?”
Hajime hesitated. The answer he knew now or when they had started? What was the expected answer?
The judge noticed the forensic doctor confusion and how his mind ran a marathon to give the right words, so he tried to give him a hint.
“Iwaizumi-san, I’ve seen your name in various reports during the last years. And I was really impressed whenever you were in charge of the autopsies, because your reports were always immaculate. I actually wanted to meet you once in person, as it's rare to have such a reliable forensic doctor. An extraordinary one. And as I can tell by now, after your statement and the written witness report before, you care for your colleagues and you work for justice as best as you can. So please, just tell us what's on your mind right now.”
Hajime couldn't feel pride because of that praise. Usually, he would at least be a little flustered, that someone had noticed his efforts. He knew well enough that he was extraordinary, the certificates shown it. But the judge's words were more a reassurance than praise. That he should let go of the scientific path for once, and just tell him what he was thinking.
Hajime inhaled and then slowly replied.
“I did it because I wanted to reveal the truth. I wanted to help him, because I’ve dealt with several cases that affected my team critically. I didn't want to let this happen again. And...I helped him, because I think there isn't any other one who could have a better eye on him than me.”
“Because of your relationship?”
“No, because his way of working is...thrilling, but as much as he gives everything to come to the truth, he's a jerk who brings himself too often in danger.”
The judge nodded, still not releasing Hajime though.
“You had suffered from an anthrax infection, is that right?”
“Yes.”
“Did you ever regret, having yourself involved with a man personally accused of murder?”
Hajime threw a glance at Tooru and the crack of a soft smile curled up his dry lips.
“No. Never" he stated clearly, as he watched his fiancé knitting his eyebrows, "Even if he had been, I’d have done the same. But...I never believed in that accusation. He's not a murderer. I would stake my life on it.”
“Thank you, Iwaizumi-san, and I’m glad you’re still with us. Closing arguments. Prosecution?”
Hajime returned to his seat and now the jury and everyone in the court room were only to listen to the last two speeches for the day before the trial's sentence would take place.
“My honour, the jury...you've seen that there was a reason why the defendant had been kicked out of the police: not obeying orders, consuming drugs, dragging an innocent police officer in a life-threatening case, and now he repeated his mistake again. It shows us not only that he isn’t able to act and decide in a proper and expected way, but it also shows that he seems to never have had the right attitude to work for justice in the first place. Justice doesn't only mean to find the culprit and bring him in jail. Justice means to avert the innocent of getting hurt. But how should he have done this? Consuming drugs could help him getting a milde sense because of temporary insanity. It also pushed his cocgnitive system - especially with the consumed amphetamines - so his mind might be sharp, but it also led to irresponsibility. Being carefree as the state of being high naturally proclaims.
And then, today, seeing the forensic doctor here, I wonder who we should believe more? A former workmate, who has been with the defendant for four years, witnessing Nakamura Heiji die, or someone who has barely met him? Being charmed by him? Fallen in love. As extraordinary as Iwaizumi Hajime is, he isn't a detective or police officer. He almost got killed once and still, he decided to go on? My jury, please consider that this can only mean a helpless case of love or that the witness himself isn't capable of taking care of himself. Moreover, consider, that it is one of the defendant's skills, charming you and lulling you in, as he is a detective. So please, don’t close your eyes to the obvious, objective truth and facts.”
He sat down. It was Ushijima’s turn, now.
Collected as ever, his face showed no unnecessary emotion as he started.
“It's true that my client has consumed drugs in the past. But this is what it is: the past. People can change. I bet everyone of you has changed at least once in your life. And if the relationship is relevant in any kind of this case, it is for the fact that the interest in Iwaizumi-san changed something for my defendant. The blood samples were all clean, there was no proof that he was still consuming substances and as Iwaizumi-san said, he and his colleagues would have noticed it.
Moreover, Sawamura-san would have, as he had worked with my client even four years ago, and knew much more about the defendant's attitude and methods. Speaking of which, please remember detective Miya’s answers and report. Although he is on the prosecution side and was involved four years ago too, he still acknowledged my defendant's abilities and sees his act as one of self-defence, considering the shoot at the serial killer Mori. So, the defendant has been suffering for four years by now. The serial killer came back for him and aimed for everyone of his surrounding, making him suffer even now. The defendant already had his penalty, don't you think? And in our society, it is also written in the law, that a resocialisation should take place. Giving anyone a second chance who wants to. Who tries to get back on track. I don’t say that you should ignore obvious facts like taking a police officer's gun, but please also consider the circumstances.”
Ushijima sat down and now, the judge closed the process and walked out of the court room, as the jury did so too. Another break.
Hajime looked at Tooru. His fiancé's eyes were watery. He just smiled weakly, and then they are all asked to wait outside by one of the guards on the sideline, until the jury would have decided the sentence and the judge came to his own too.
They waited another fifteen minutes, but actually it only needed five to six, as they were asked to get in again.
Was this a good or...a bad sign?
“The jury has decided that” the judge began slowly, everyone silent in the room, “The defendant, Oikawa Tooru, 27, ex-detective of the Police Department of Tokyo, has been a drug abuser, leading him to take risky decisions during his cases and putting others' lives in danger, taking the gun from a detective without permission” the judge continued all serious.
Tooru shut his eyes closed. He wished to be deaf at that moment. He didn't want to hear his sentence, his horrible destiny.
He wanted to escape. Escape from everything, with Hajime.
Even though he said, that he would accept everything...he wanted a life. A life with him.
“However, under these circumstances and the given proofs, it also showed that the defendant cares for his partners at work. He takes responsibility every time, defending them even from dangerous situations, putting himself in danger first. Because of that, he had spent one month in hospital in a coma status. His life was threatened more than once too. As there are no proper proofs that Oikawa Tooru is really to be accused of any murder in the recent case, as the fingerprints are actually an inconvenience but not a clear evidence for him, being the culprit of the letter bomb. As the jury came to the conclusion that he already had his punishment for this," the judge took a pause, before saying, "Oikawa Tooru is acquitted of all charges.”
Tooru’s eyes widened in disbelief. Ushijima put a hand on his shoulder, showing a light smile. He wasn't dreaming.
But he needed assurance. Needed to see the other’s faces...all happy.
Hajime tilted his head to Tooru in disbelief too. Pressing his lips together, he didn't take care of anything now, even though the judge hadn't officially ended the trial.
The forensic doctor just jumped up, walked over to the desk of the attorney's side, and stumbled on his way because of the excitement.
Grabbing the still surprised Tooru by the hand, he pulled him up and against his body, holding him now, that even his muscles were trembling.
“Thank you...thank you...God...”
He wasn't religious or anything, but right now he was muttering it all over again like a prayer.
Tears were dwelling up while he was doing so, streaming over his face.
Tooru needed a second more to realise it himself, and couldn't stop his body from cry out of joy and relief.
“I’m free...Hajime...I’m free!” he sobbed, holding onto his fiancé, as if his life depended on it.
Inhaling Hajime’s scent, then cupping his cheeks, he kissed him.
God, he had missed this!
Even if they had kissed before the sentence, he had missed feeling Hajime like this, with no worries at all, carefree.
And so that simple kiss was maybe just that from the outside, but for them, it meant a beginning.
“I so love you...I love you, Tooru...” Hajime wiped off the tears with the back of his hand, then had to chuckle and look into the other's eyes, “Damn it...you made such a crybaby out of me!”
Maybe the judge had ended the trial with a final slam with the hammer, because the others appeared around them too: Kuroo and Akaashi. Daiichi. And...even Atsumu.
“I’m so relieved, Tooru!” Kuroo smiled, as the brother he was to him.
Tooru released himself from Hajime's embrace to hug the chemist tight.
“You...are so damn cool, Kuroo Tetsuro! You are simply the best, thank you for everything you did for me!” Tooru spoke while doing so.
“Now now, not in front of your man!” Kuroo laughed and hugged him back.
“I’m glad you made it, Oikawa-san” Akaashi said with a polite but still compassionate smile.
“Thank you, Keiji. Even if I was losing my hopes at the end” Tooru admitted and his hair got almost ruffled by Hajime, scolding him to speak out this negative thought he had immediately.
“You didn’t deserve to end up in jail after all. That's it” Miya spoke up, getting a bit closer.
Then, too everyone's surprise, he held out a hand.
“I’m sorry...for everything, really” his usual cocky smirk vanished from his lips and he looked into Tooru's eyes with sincerity.
Tooru stared at the hand, then at Miya himself, and finally shook his hand.
“That doesn’t mean I’ll stop thinking that you are an asshole!” Atsumu added, tightening the shake.
“I won’t deny it either. Because I am” Tooru smirked back.
“Is this...a make up?” Kuroo lifted his eyebrows and mumbled to Hajime, who nodded slightly.
“Seems so.”
Thanking Ushijima for the excellent defense, after some more minutes, they were allowed to leave.
On the corridor, Tooru spoke the last words with his attorney. Hajime waited for him and then entangled his hand with his own. So much better.
Maybe it was childish to think that, but he never wanted to let go of this hand ever again.
“I know that this is somehow a bit spontaneous, and you maybe rather like just laying in your own bed, but..." clearing his throat, Hajime shot a quick look at Tooru, "Would you mind...coming with me? I mean...my flat?”
Tooru stared at Hajime for a moment, then just smiled softly.
“I’ll come anywhere, if it means I’ll stay with you.”
“You will.”
He had gone by car to the court, so Hajime drove them the way back carefully. Maybe taking a little extra turn around the nicest streets of Tokyo and enjoyingthe fact he was able to be with Tooru again. Together.
He couldn't help it but putting his hand on Tooru’s at every red traffic light.
Stopping the car in the parking lot in front of the apartment building he was living in, they got off.
Walking up to the entry hall, they used the elevator to the right floor and reached the apartment's door.
Hesitating, Hajime turned to Tooru.
“Close your eyes.”
Waiting for the irritated Tooru to do so, Hajime then added, “Now open your hand.”
“What? Ugh...” Tooru obeyed with a huff, and suddenly a metallic item fell into Tooru’s palm.
The detective instinctively knew what it was.
He thenopened his eyes slowly, staring at the key in his palm for three minutes straight, until he was able to look at Hajime again, who was smiling all over.
“What...does it mean?” Tooru asked with a hoarse voice, while his heart was beating fast.
He already knew the answer though.
"Well, Mr Detective...don’t tell me, you can’t come to a conclusion?"
He was even being teased now!
"Open up the door. Then you’ll see."
And when Tooru was doing so and they finally were about to step in, he switched on the light right next to the door on the right side.
On the wall, where the house key was usually hanging on a spot, was a second free space. And Hajime's key was put there.
So...the one he held was a second one? Wait...a second...so...
Tooru stared at the key with teary eyes now, getting the clue more than right.
“Ha...Hajime...” he sobbed, breathless, “Are you...are you serious about this? Are you sure...that I can have...?!"
The tears fell from his eyes, Tooru was a sobbing mess. No surprise, after all the anticipation of today, the stress and now...even this.
Still, Hajime was shocked by the reaction and misread it a bit.
“H-hey...w-why are you crying now?!” he cupped Tooru’s cheeks, “Tooru...love...hey, did I...is it too much?!”
Tooru shook his head, holding both of Hajime’s hands with his own, which were cupping his cheeks.
“I've just never expected anyone...never expected you to give me the key to your own home” Tooru explained between his crying.
He was just so happy right now, but there was still that little devil in his mind, telling him he didn't deserve such a treatment at all.
“Never expected me to?” Hajime repeated quietly, kissing the tears from the corner of Tooru's eyes away, “Tooru...of course I do. As I want to live with you...as I want to marry you. As I...want to spend my life, having a family and so much more with you.”
He kissed him again, a peck on the lips.
“There’s nothing...nothing in this world more important to me than you, Hajime" Tooru whispered back, and the little devil was beaten back with a big punch of love vibes, "Living with you, marrying you, having our own family...”
“Then let’s go inside and close the door.”
And Hajime said it in a voice that was clearly telling that there was more to expect there.
“Detective...my home is under your investigation.”
Starting with the second pair of home slippers in the entrance, second pair of small towel and shower towel, also space in the bathroom shelves.
Second tooth brush. Having a matching set of mugs placed on the couch table, so he would see it right away.
And a little rearrangement of the bedroom: the bed itself was replaced by a bigger one. Standing more in the middle, so two suiting nightstands were placed.
And the open wardrobe showed enough space for Tooru’s clothes from now on too.
But on the bed, with the clean sheets, two blankets and pillows instead of a big one, was also a greeting card.
Discovering everything, every detail, Tooru's eyes almost sparkled like the one of a child, going on easter egg hunt.
Welcome Home, Tooru.
“I just put all my hopes up that Ushijima would kick you free and...well, it’s not quite finished and uhm...of course you should have a saying, if it comes to interior or so...” Hajime explained quietly next to him, as he had followed Tooru through the whole flat, seeing him now holding the greeting card.
“This isn’t...a dream right?” Tooru asked, breaking out in tears again, but this time only of pure happiness, “What can I say, Haji...I don’t even find proper words to describe how much...how happy I am right now” Tooru said and then just jumped on Hajime.
They were both falling on the bed, Tooru having his hands wrapped around the other's neck tightly.
“No. It’s not a dream” Hajime answered quietly and had to laugh then.
Holding Tooru safe and sound, he inhaled his sweet scent, caressing his fluffy hair. Rolling with him over, so they were laying side by side, he muttered, “One more” and pointed up to the ceiling, “It will be better to be seen, if we have it fully dark in here.”
And Hajime meant the glued-on fluorescent little stars up there.
“Hajime...” Tooru whispered, all surprised and amazed and couldn't help it but smile brightly. He sat up up, coming closer to the stars, but then looked down at his man, who wasn't staring at the ceiling at all. Of course.
For Hajime, Tooru had always been the brightest star.
“I love you, my lovely Iwa-chan” Tooru smiled from one ear to the other, and bent down to kiss Hajime gently, noses touching, hands stroking.
How lovely his own name came over that amazing man’s lips, who was to be called his husband soon.
Returning Tooru's smile, Hajime intertwined their fingers.
“I love you too...my Tooru-chan” he teased, pulling the other to him, until he could look down on Tooru and spoke in a hoarse kind of whisper.
“Marry me, Tooru. Marry me, become my husband, live with me and...have our own little family, together.”
And at that moment, his olive-green eyes were sparkling the same way like the real stars were doing in the sky...with an eternity of love and fondness for the love of his life.
Tooru giggled, as he heard the not-so-new but still cute nickname of his, gettingt a little more serious afterwards.
“I do, Hajime” Tooru cupped Hajime's cheeks and kissed his lips once more, as if he wanted to seal their life-long promise.
Notes:
Fluff fluff fluff!!!
Don't miss the LAST chapter, it's gonna be super cute and soft. I'll update it soon, don't you worry!
Every comment, kudo, bookmark or subscription is really appreciated!
Thank you for supporting us again and again with this! <3
Chapter 22: Happy ever after
Summary:
“Tooru, wake up...we’ll be late” Hajime whispered into his love’s ear, with a beautiful smile on his face.
No response.
“No shower together, if you don’t get up.”
“You meanie! You haven’t changed at all!”
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
“Tooru, wake up...we’ll be late” Hajime whispered into his love’s ear, with a beautiful smile on his face.
He had kept watching him for a while now, but it was already 7.30 AM, and they had to get ready until nine to leave for...well.
Stroking over Tooru’s left hand with his fingers, right over the wedding band, he put his chin in his palm, as he supported himself on the elbow, and allowed himself to look at his beautiful husband once more, but then Hajime bent down and started kissing his ear.
One day he had found out that Tooru was extremely ticklish on the upper part of his auricle. And although it had been a long night...they had to get dressed.
“No shower together, if you don’t get up.”
Tooru opened his eyes, as he heard his husband saying so. Making a grimace of disapproval he gave the other male a nudge against the chest. Hajime chuckled, falling back on his back.
“You meanie! You haven’t changed at all!” Tooru complained, totally awake now.
“I know, and you love me for that!” Hajime smirked and swung his legs out of bed.
Coming around to the other side, he held out his hand and although the detective sulked a bit, he took it. Letting him lead to the bathroom.
Hajime promised to make up right there and now - and he did.
Well enough, that Tooru was a little mess in the kitchen after the shower. So much, that he spilled some of the milk for the hot chocolate all over the working desk.
“Trembling fingers?” Hajime teased, lifting his eyebrows and kissing him softly on the cheek, before Tooru could open his mouth for any justified insult.
Hajime took over the chocolate-making and told his husband to sit down - no injuries on the big day!
Carefully, under Tooru's observing eyes, he prepared the drink, as in the meantime the coffee machine did its job for himself.
Sitting together at the table and having breakfast, they checked all the necessary documents afterwards. There was a lot they had to send in beforehand, but some of them, like the birth certificate, had to be handed directly.
“Don’t forget your IC!” he called out, when Tooru headed to the bedroom to get another tie, so he was ready to meet their from-now-on-daughter.
The adoption process had taken a while, they had met the child a few times too, but finally...everything was settled.
Looking at his reflection in the mirror, Hajime exhaled the air with a puff, clearly being the nervous one now.
Struggling with his own tie, he felt his heartbeat go faster.
He might had sounded composed, but actually he was nervous as fuck. His fingers were trembling and not being able to do his own tie was something that didn't go unnoticed by Tooru. The brunette chuckled, arranging the collar of his jacket, as he stepped over to the shorter male.
“What’s up, Haji?” Tooru asked, teasing him a bit, as he cupped Hajime’s right cheek with his hand and looked into his beautiful olive-green eyes that never failed to make him fall in love again and again with his man.
Almost pouting a bit when he heard Tooru's chuckle, Hajime blushed, but didn't say anything as his husband did the ugly tie with a few coordinated movements.
Following his eyes, he looked into his brown ones and automatically relaxed a bit.
"Just...it felt like final exams you know" he then replied, "Actually...I’m not a good exam candidate. Slightly overreacting, haha..."
The weak try of a laughter ended in a sigh.
"I just hope that she will like it here. With us."
“She will” Tooru reassured him with a smile, “Because we’ll love her from the bottom of our heart, and you will be a great father! As the perfect man you are to me...and I’m so proud of you, Hajime. She’ll love you the most, I already know it!” Tooru chuckled, and kissed Hajime’s nose tenderly.
The other still looked at him and nodded. That was true...there was no way they wouldn't love her. And she had shown them that she wasn't scared or anything...else they would have never got this far.
"Don’t make me blush. There's no need to push my ego!" Hajime chuckled to himself, but then was already greeted by his husband's soft lips.
"And I wouldn’t be, if it wasn’t for you" he whispered when they parted again, "Thank you, Tooru. Thank you for encouraging me."
Hajime leaned in, kissing Tooru now with all he had and taking his husband's hand in his for a few seconds.
"So...let’s go?"
But even though Hajime suggested that they should finally leave, he let Tooru drive them safely to the institute where they would pick up their daughter. The ride was about twenty minutes, and they didn't speak much. Music playing in the radio, they kept silent, as both of them were still excited.
It was such a milestone in their life. Such a miracle which was about to happen. Actually, both men still couldn't get how they had come this far. How their own little family was finally to happen.
Getting out of the car when they stood in the parking lot, Hajime breathed in and out one more time, before they entered the building.
His stomach rumbled and felt like it was twisting. Maybe it hadn't been a good idea to drink so much coffee in the morning, because his bloodpressure had been already high.
In the entrance hall, they announced their arrival at the front desk. The receptionist nodded and called a number with his desktop phone.
They were told to wait in the area to their right. An open waiting room with a few armchairs and small tables between them.
Time went by too slowly.
Hajime looked again and again on his wrist watch. Tooru was tapping nervously with his feet on the ground.
But then, another twenty minutes later, they were called by their names.
Lifting their heads in sync, they saw the woman they had contact with before approaching them.
She smiled at the married couple kindly, greeting them in her polite manner they already knew.
“Nice to see you again. Ayako-chan is already really excited!” she said and pointed out to the corridor where she had come from, so they could follow her.
Standing up, they handed her the identity cards, which the consultant would copy later, as they were being led through the floor. They got to the community room that they had visited already for four times by now.
And behind that door...there she was.
Hajime's and Tooru's heart skipped a beat.
Ayako's chocolate-brown hair, a little bit darker than Tooru's but lighter than Hajime's, had been tied up to two pigtails. Her green eyes were sparkling as she saw the two men looking at her, ready to pick her up this time for real. No further goodbyes.
Grinning, she left the paper and pens she had occupied herself with for the waiting minutes, she jumped from her chair and ran to both of them.
Throwing her arms around Hajime's legs, she laughed and so did Hajime. Bending down, he let her wrap her tiny arms around his neck now.
"Ayako-chan, how are you?!"
"Fine! Papa-zumi!" she laughed, looking up at Tooru too, but her smile was a bit less shining, something between shyness and being insecure.
So she nestled herself into Hajime's arms even more.
The detective looked at them, giving a wry smile and putting his hands in his pockets. There was no human in this world who couldn't love Hajime.
I knew she’ll love you the most...
“Please come over, we still need your signature on these papers" the institution's headmistress said, and so they spent the next minutes with signing, going through the adoption papers again and being told the further administrative steps, which didn't affect them.
“Thank you!” Ayako exclaimed happily and excited, and waved with her tiny hand when she left the building with her packed stuff together with the married couple.
Chuckling, they took the two suitcases and walked over to the car. Ayako insisted to take her own little shoulder bag though, and grabbed Hajime's hand again.
Even when they were returning home, Hajime driving and Tooru sitting in the back with their daughter, trying to play some memory game with her, she seemed to avoid his gaze and only gave short responses to him.
Hajime noticed, looking into the driver's mirror, but whenever he spoke to her during the ride, she got all over excited and replied happily.
Exchanging looks through the mirror glass with his husband, he could read it in Tooru's eyes, how much his heart dropped.
Maybe...after all it was strange for her, having two fathers? Maybe he wasn't...able to give her what she wanted? Love?
Had he ever been able to love properly? Him, who had never been loved, not from his parents who had abandoned him right when he was born?
Yeah, he loved Hajime. So much. But it was different from the love you give to your child, right?
And Tooru wanted to give their daughter all the love he had never received in his childhood. Giving her all the attention, giving her everything.
However, Ayako avoided him somehow.
It didn't change when they got home. Hajime announced to prepare lunch and of course the little girl was all over to help him, babbling non-stop, as if Tooru wasn't there.
So the brunette detective went to her prepared bedroom. He tried not to overthink, as that was a new situation for everyone, and maybe she needed some time for herself.
So he kept himself rather occupied with adjusting her bed’s blanket, her brand new toys, putting a little Godzilla plushie that Iwaizumi had bought for her, and another alien one that Tooru had bought. Unpacking her suitcases, putting the clothes into the wardrobe, into the drawer...it didn't help.
When he had arranged the socks and closed the drawer, tears started to form into his eyes. Instantly rubbing them, trying to wipe off the little tears, he pursed his lips.
Damn it, he had married the love of his life, he was living with him! They were finally building their own family!
And all Tooru's doing was crying?
All that matters...is that she’s happy.
He repeated that sentence in loop in his mind, calming down again.
When Hajime called him from the kitchen, stating that lunch was ready, Tooru stood up from the bed he had sat on, and walked to the kitchen, finding Ayako on Hajime’s arm, laughing, trying to pour some ramen into a bowl. Tooru smiled tenderly, going to help them setting the table.
“Wait, I’ll help you. That’s a bit tricky” Hajime murmured, focused on the ramen and the heavy kitchen tool Ayako wanted to hold.
Adding the rest together into the bowl, he then complimented her with a “Woha, great! See? Ayako made you ramen almost all by herself!”
He looked up to Tooru, noticing his slightly puffy eyes, deciding to stay silent. He didn't want to discuss about it in front of the kid.
Making the other two portions, Hajime let Ayako down and brought the bowls on a tray over. They sat down at the table, when Hajime looked up.
“You...did that ritual, right?” the one where Ayako and the others held hands and said some rhyme before eating, “Wanna teach us?”
Holding out his hands, Hajime grabbed Tooru’s a little tighter than necessary, showing some unspoken encouragement and that the silent struggle his husband went through didn't get unnoticed.
The detective glanced at him, smiling softly and gratefully, holding his hand back tight.
Ayako held Hajime’s hand cheerfully of course and with no hesitance, but when it came to Tooru, who was holding his hand up to her, she only dared to wrap her little fingertips around his one. Lightly. Almost no pressure.
Tooru noticed the difference in her holding, but didn't comment it nor showed any reaction.
All that matters is loving her, no matter what. Even if she likes Hajime more.
As Ayako sang a little rhyme, Hajime and Tooru followed in the second verse, singing and laughing with her, because they were both not used to it, singing the rhymes they probably had learnt in school or kindergarten.
“Papa-zumi, noodles are delicious!” the girl exclaimed happily the moment she tasted them, mouth full.
It was like Oikawa’s reaction when he liked food. Almost the same.
Tooru smiled.
“They are very tasty! Did you help Papa-zumi to make this? You’re really a great chef, Aya-chan!” Tooru tried and approached her with a tissue to clean her face, because some of the ramen’s soup had drooled all over her.
Ayako nodded lightly, but avoided his eyes when he was wiping her chin. At least, she let him.
Hajime smirked, but a thought came to his mind. Was she just shy? Or...did Tooru remind her of someone?
There were a lot of possibilities, and Tooru was trying so hard that it stabbed Hajime's heart a bit, how his husband's efforts didn't get any reward. Of course, it wasn't Ayako's fault. They would never think that, but still they should get behind the reason. Because when they had met her the first time and visited her the second and third, everything had seemed to be okay?
Continuing to eat, she was doing very well for her age of three, Hajime tried to encourage her a little bit more to interact with Tooru.
Some questions. Some little comments referring to him.
“Ayako-chan, Papa Tooru and I will do the dishes, because you already cooked! How about trying out your new colour pencils?” Hajime suggested, when they were finished, pointing over to the couch table where paper and the brand-new drawing tools they had organised for her were ready to be used.
Ayako blinked twice and then she just laughed.
“Yes! Colours!” and slid from her chair to run to the table. Getting the paper and pens, she sat down on the floor and started to choose with which pencil she should start drawing.
Tooru gave her a silent smile, then looked at her from distance, standing up and beginning to clear the table.
Hajime followed him, as he let some water run into the sink.
“Tooru” he said, letting the water run more slowly, “Come to me for a second?”
Waiting, until his husband approached him with questioning eyes, he pulled him closer to his body, cupping his cheeks. Observing him for a second, and looking him into the eyes, Hajime's eyebrows knitted in worry, and he spoke more seriously now.
“You cried.”
No question. A fact. He could feel it. The swollen eyelids, the warm cheeks. He noticed how Tooru's eyes had still too much wetness.
“I’ll...ask her later, if there's anything we can do for her. I don’t know if she’s shy or just needs to open up or...”
Tooru lowered his gaze. He took his husband’s hand, holding it and kissing his palms.
“No need to pressure her. It’s fine, really. If she’s happy, I’m happy too” Tooru tried to sound convincing, even if he felt the pain in his heart, but he meant it.
Ayako's happines was his first priority.
“I just...you know, I just fear that I’m not a good father as I thought I would be. Maybe I’m not able to love her the way she wants. The way she needs. Maybe I’m just too weird for her...” Tooru finally spoke about his insecurities and the little devils which had lingered in his mind since they had been sitting in the car.
“Wo-wo-woah! Stop it!” Hajime exclaimed right after his husband had ended, looking at him with wide eyes, “Tooru...I don’t think that you’re doing anything wrong here!” he held his hands tight, “Really...if that was the case, she would have shown you, somehow. I’m sure.”
As Ayako could clearly tell someone what and who she didn't like.
She had done so during one of their visits at the orphanage: refusing to eat the carrots loudly, throwing the spoon around because the caretaker wanted to convince her that the carrots tasted good.
“You aren’t weird. The way you talk to her, play with her or even clean her because of some spilled noodle soup...I think, everyone could tell that you're trying your best in showing her the love she needs.”
Embracing him again, Hajime stroked through Tooru’s hair. His husband hugged him back, but tightened his fists into the other's shirt so the fabric visibly crumpled.
“I just want...to give her all the love I can give. I don’t want her to feel unloved like I did back then...” Tooru almost whispered.
“Papa-zumi! Look what I’ve drawn!”
Ayako's little voice suddenly sounded across the whole apartment, overly excited again. Tooru smiled weakly at Hajime, as she had called only him again.
“Go. She needs you, Papa-zumi” Tooru said, kissing Hajime’s cheek softly, and then released himself from the other's embrace to do the dishes in the sink.
“Tooru...” Hajime wanted to say something, but Ayako was already calling him once more.
Biting his lip, Hajime’s heart wrenched, watching his husband's back with the sunk shoulders.
I really hope that this will change...
Hajime rubbed his neck, going to the living room and approaching the little girl who was still sitting on the floor. The pencils were all spread around her, sheets of papers too. He bent down and put on a smile.
“So...what did you draw?” he asked her in a cheerful voice.
Ayako turned her little head over her shoulder, so her pigtails swung funnily around and she picked up the finished picture, showing it to Hajime.
“I drew Papa-zumi, me and...Papa-Toto!” she grinned.
Hajime nodded and looked at the sheet of paper, at the drawn-himself with his spiky black hair (maybe a bit too spiky there), and the little Ayako next to him, smiling with red cheeks. And then Tooru.
All holding hands.
But Tooru...didn't have a face, as Ayako had drawn only his curly hair. When Hajime asked her about the reason, she lowered her gaze and...blushed?
“I don’t know how to draw Papa-Toto’s beautiful face...” she only replied shyly, quickly grabbing another drawing to hide it under the sheets.
“Have you drawn something else?” he encouraged her, because he had noticed her reaction of course, “Wanna show me this, too?”
Ayako hesitated. Should she? It was a secret. A present! Nobody should see it before the one it was meant for. But...if it was Papa-zumi, it was okay, right?
She picked it up and handed it to him. It was a drawing of her and Tooru, holding each other and smiling at each other.
She had also drawn a lot of hearts around them.
“I want to give this to Papa-Toto...but I didn’t draw him well, it’s not as beautiful as him...” she explained, a little sad.
So...that was the problem?!
Hajime had to smirk and looked at the picture.
“I think...you drew him very well!” he replied, “You should show him!”
Ayako glanced over to the kitchen, where Tooru was doing the dishes. She almost felt convinced, but then the girl heard a little sigh leaving his throat.
Turning around to Hajime, she asked him with worried eyes.
“Why is Papa-Toto so sad, Papa-Zumi?”
“Ayako-chan...” Hajime began, as he looked up, seeing Tooru's shrunk posture.
He pulled her closer, sitting down himself and letting her sit on his lap.
“You like Papa-Toto very much, right?”
Seeing her blushing and shy expression again, he stroked her hair.
“Yes, I like him so much!” Ayako whispered with a nod at Hajime and smiled in her cute shy way.
“Would you like to cheer him up? I guess he won’t be so sad, once he'll see your drawings?”
“Do you think so, Papa-Zumi?” she looked at him with sparkling eyes and Hajime had to lean in to understand her properly as she was whispering her words again.
Seems, I have to share my husband from now on.
“I’m more than sure about that” he encouraged her again, “Papa-Toto will be very happy. Don’t be scared, Ayako-chan. There’s no way he wouldn’t be happy!”
Ayako stared at her father for a few seconds and then smiled widely, wrapping her little arms around him and kissing him happily on the cheek.
“I go and show him my drawings!!” she jumped up and ran with her little feet to the kitchen.
Tooru had just finished doing the dishes and wiping off his hands on the towel, sighing heavily again.
He had heard his daughter laughing so cheerfully with his husband, and of course he was happy about that, but it also saddened him.
No matter how much he wanted to convince himself that it was all good as long as Ayako-chan was happy...it wasn't.
Suddenly hearing tiny foot steps coming to the kitchen, he turned in that direction.
“Aya-chan? Is everything alright?” Tooru asked a bit surprised to see her there alone, without Hajime around.
Ayako made a little step forward and then handed him the drawing, not saying anything.
Tooru blinked, but then his eyes went wide as he stared at the colourful picture.
“Did...did you draw this?” Tooru asked, looking at her again.
“Yes...” she replied shyly, stepping from one foot to the other.
Hajime's husband smiled, then looked at the drawing again, that showed the little Ayako with...him? And a lot of hearts?!
“What...i-is this you and me?!” Tooru spoke up, even more shocked about that surprise.
“Yes, I don’t know how to draw your...beautiful face because...I love Papa-Toto so much!” she blushed, and that was it.
That was what it all was about!
Tooru’s eyes began to water. Some tears fell down and he kneeled down to her, pulling the little girl into a tight hug.
“I love you too, Aya-chan, so much...Papa-Toto loves you more than anything!” Tooru said between his sobs, kissing her on the cheeks.
Not knowing that he was being watched by someone standing on the threshold with crossed arms and all smiling to himself.
"Love her more than anything? Well, that's fine, having a rival here. I’ll give my best not to lose!" Hajime made himself audible then, walking over and looking gently at his both beloved ones. Hugging them, kissing them, he smiled, "And I really love both of you. Our little family."
He did. Nothing more was to be asked. Nothing more to be wished for.
The adoption process almost took a whole year, after they had been living three cute couple lovey-dovey years, only enjoying each other.
Taking the time they hadn't had before.
Three years, because the marriage status was wanted. And so they had a wonderful wedding in Tokyo with their friends, the family they had chosen.
Moving together in an apartment big enough to offer enough space for their future-child. And here they were now.
Home is where the heart is.
For Hajime, it had always been Tooru since they had met.
And now, a little girl had made their way into their hearts too.
And Hajime was absolutely okay with it.
“I’ll win this!” Ayako exclaimed excitedly, as she thought it was some game, and hugged Tooru even tighter, looking at Hajime with a big grin.
Tooru giggled in response, and then hugged his husband and his daughter back.
“You both...are my world” Tooru said sweetly, kissing Hajime’s nose, and touching lightly Ayako’s one.
“I want a kiss too!!” she pouted immediately.
Just like Tooru.
“Here, my princess..."
Tooru leaned in with a smirk and brushed her little nose with his lips.
This was love.
This...was family.
Notes:
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE SUPPORT YOU GAVE US (AND HOPEFULLY WILL GIVE) TO OUR FIC!
We are so grateful you enjoyed it, but unfortunately our journey ends here! FOR NOW ;P
We'll see you soon, and thank you for everything, we really love you guys!!
Our babies are happy, that's all they deserve <3
Saru & Aya
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