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How to Panic During the Crown Prince's Birthday

Summary:

It's Noct's birthday, and Prompto, being the perfectly-imperfect omega he is, tries to think of a good birthday gift that isn't a good head.

Notes:

I cannot, for the life of me, get myself to sit my ass down and write this fic. This is gonna be mega late, but happy birthday to the prince of pain and certified king of fishing! This is entirely self-indulgent because I just want some A/B/O Promptis cuddling and doing stupid stuff together. Also, good golly, I suck at titles.

Anywho, hope you enjoy this madness :)))

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Chin Up, Princess

Chapter Text

Prompto doesn’t need to look over at Noct’s direction to know that his best friend is one breath away from banging his head onto their accumulated pile of homework scattered all over the ornate desk. Hell, Prompto doesn’t even feel aggravated to begin with considering that he, too, wants to say fuck it and wander off to lalaland.

But the last time he’d done exactly that, his grades also flew away to high heaven, and he spent his free time begging for extra credits, much to a certain someone’s dismay. In short, flunking a test now is becoming more of a hassle now that the finals week is creeping in.

He needs a boost badly, because if he so much fails this exam-- not that it’s an uncommon occurrence, really-- then that spells summer remedial classes. And that’s going to be a disaster for him, mainly because he’d rather earn crowns than sit on a chair all-day listening to the law of supply and demand.

So as much as he likes to throw all the papers into the nearby trash bin and cuddle away with Noct, he can’t afford to lose hangout time with his best friend because of stupid grades. Thus, with a resigned sigh, Prompto stops twirling his pen around with his fingers and pokes Noct’s side with the pen’s cap, “Noct, come on, buddy, don’t fall asleep on me now!”

Noctis grunts in annoyance as he sluggishly waves off Prompto’s incessant prodding. “We’ve been studying for hours, Prom. Let’s just take a break.”

“But we took a break ten minutes ago!”

“Too short.”

“Noct!” When the prince leans onto the backrest of his seat, Prompto knows that he’s fighting a losing battle. Again, he can’t blame Noctis for wanting to call it a night. “Look, one more page then it’s off to bed. Sounds okay with ya?”

There’s not much response on Noctis’ end save for a contemplative hum, but as soon as the silence stretches into an uncomfortable one, Prompto dejectedly accepts his fate. Ah well, Noct needs his sleep anyway, so there’s no point in coercing the prince out from his date with the love of his life. “Nevermind, thanks for the help, Noct.”

“No problem,” drawls Noct. He’s already standing up from his seat when he continues, ‘Come on, let’s sleep.”

“Nah, you go ahead first.” At Noctis’ questioning gaze, Prompto flashes a reassuring smile. “I’ll finish this one.”

“You’re oddly productive,” Noctis notes. Prompto’s gotta hand it to him: that’s an astute observation if he ever heard one.

“Hey, I can be productive when I want to be!” Prompto quips with a chuckle. “Seriously, dude, go to bed. I’ll be with you in an hour tops.”

It doesn’t take a blind man to notice that Noct is torn between staying with Prom ‘til he finishes the gods-damned homework or calling it a night. Well, on the bright side, it’s good to know that Prompto’s a worthy enough opponent to compete with sleep in Noct’s eyes.

In the end, the prince ultimately makes his decision and slumps down on the chair he preoccupied not too long ago. Prompto’s smile brightens. Gods, he’s terribly lucky to have a guy like Noct in his pleb life.

As Noct buries his face on the crook of his neck, instincts have him baring his neck for the alpha. Warmth floods his freckled cheeks as Noctis’ breath fans throughout his skin, reminding him of the countless nights spent fumbling about on the bed.

At this stage of their relationship, it’s normal for Noct to leave his scent all over Prompto due to some— and Prompto quotes— “bullshit political reasons.” That the Crown has forbidden Noctis from marking anyone who isn’t approved by the Council sparks an outrage in the prince (and, to be honest with himself, in Prompto as well. Social standings aside, there are many instances where Prompto just wants to have Noct sink his teeth on that one particular spot to certify that yeah— the Crown Prince’s smitten with this pleb who trips on his feet every now and then).

How many times did Ignis reprimand them both to not mark each other and incur the wrath of old, conservative farts? How many times did Gladio have to pry them apart because they were being too friendly in public eyes? How many times did Prompto himself muster up the courage to pull himself away from Noct when things become too heated and say no, we can’t, Noct, I’m so sorry?

Prompto doesn’t know the number anymore. But it has happened so many times that his desires just manifests itself into dreams where he and Noct can confidently hold each other’s hands without having the press secretly tail their asses.

One day, Noct has promised when they’ve been looking up at the fading stars in silence on Noct’s balcony. One day, when the Council realizes where they can shove their opinions in regards to their relationship, they’ll have their happy ending.

The future seems a little bit far-fetched right now, even if Noct’s birthday draws near (oh crap, he needs to think of a present). But right now, it’s all about ensuring everyone else in school knows that Prompto is off-limits. If the scent doesn’t deter them off, then Noct’s constant presence will be enough of a hint.

Speaking of school…

“Hey, are you trying to distract me?” Prompto purses his lips yet purrs anyway as Noct nibbles on where the mark should be.

“Mhm,” Noct confirms nonchalantly, pulling away for a short moment to plant a featherweight kiss. “Is it working?”

Definitely, especially down there. Godsdamn it, if Noct’s going to be this much of an asshole, then the chances of studying is going to be non-existent. As much as he wants to have his dick do the thinking, he clutches onto the remaining sense of accountability he has left. “Maybe, maybe not.”

“You’re gonna be fine, Prom,” Noct whispers right by his ear and holy fuck, it’s leaving an effect on him alright. “Don’t worry too much.”

Prompto brings a free hand up to Noct’s birdnest-of-a-hair and curls his fingers onto the smooth locks. They’re soft, fluffy from all those products he uses, no doubt. Frequent visits to the bathroom gives him the opportunity to see the shit ton of beauty products lined up on the shelves. What Prompto would give to own at least a quarter of those items. “I’m blaming it on you if I fail the quiz.”

Noctis grunts a non-committal sound and continues to pepper Prompto’s throat with quick and sloppy kisses.

Ah, fuck it -- grades don’t reflect a person’s character anyway.

(When their economics professor has handed out their quizzes two days after taking it, Prompto embraces Noct with the strength of a baby garula upon seeing a bold red B stamped on his paper. Noctis and his perfect score, on the other hand, simply basks on the omega’s jubilant smile and scent while discreetly glaring off potential suitors looking their way.

Once Prompto returns back to his empty home and catches sight of the calendar, the panic settles in. Noct’s birthday is coming up and he doesn’t have a single clue on what to give Noct. Oh Six, it’s Valentine’s day all over again, except it’s worse because at least he can give the customary chocolates and flowers as a present. Birthdays though are an entirely different matter.)




On Prompto’s calendar, August 30th is encircled in bright red. Prompto knows by heart what that special day is, and he wastes no time in sending out a flurry of happy birthday texts to Noctis’ phone first thing in the morning.

PromProm [06:15]: Happy birthday, hunn <333333

PromProm [06:15]: sending all my kisses your way (⁎⁍̴̆Ɛ⁍̴̆⁎)

PromProm [06:16]: wish I could snag you for the whole day tho 。゚(゚´Д`゚)

Of course, there’s no way Noct’s up this early in the morning unless there’s a state-of-emergency meeting that popped up out of nowhere. So Prompto places his phone back on top of the drawer and flopped back on bed. Now, here comes the hard part: the silence that brings forth a series of internal monologuing.

They can’t actually celebrate Noct’s birthday ASAP since the day calls for several public appearances throughout the day and a formal event held in the Citadel after dark(ness-- gods-damnit, Xenohart). Prompto has long brushed aside the hurt that throbs in his chest whenever he’s reminded of this fact: that Prompto, in the eyes of the public, is but a speck of dust in comparison to the star that is Noctis Lucis Caelum.

The real party however starts the day after, wherein Noct’s circle of friends hosts a party of their own in Noct’s apartment and drink and game to their hearts’ content: Ignis will prepare the greatest cake Prompto has ever tasted; Gladio will bring in the good stuff and throw Noct and Prompto around like Santa hauling all the Christmas gifts; Iris will decorate the place with whatever theme she has in mind; Noct will cheat his way to victory in game sessions (what an ass); and Prompto—

Well, Prompto, the perfectly-imperfect omega he is, will do absolutely nothing but be himself during the party and then give Noct a good head once they’re alone for the rest of the night— or, specifically, early in the godsdamn morning.

It’s a solid plan— a hundred percent Gladio-certified scheme that works on Noct like a charm. It might also be Ignis-certified should they choose to not pull an all-nighter out of frivolity.

Now here’s the second part that prevents Prompto from focusing on his other tasks for the day: Noct’s present. The first question that comes to mind every year is this: what should Prompto give to someone who can pretty much get whatever the hell he wants?


(“Your love and affection,” Gladio teased when Prompto’s creativity had failed him. Beside the Shield, Ignis heaved a sigh.

“What he means, Prompto, is that your company alone is enough of a present,” the advisor corrected, ignoring Gladio’s incredulous snort.

Once upon a time, Prompto had dreaded that his presence alone wasn’t enough, but Gladio repeatedly assured him that if Noct’s disappointed by Prompto’s lack of gifts, then the Shield will eat his most expensive shoe. And if that statement wasn’t enough to mitigate the blonde’s anxiety, Gladio further suggested Prompto to wear a rice sack and nothing else.

“Dude, seriously?” A flustered yet entirely oblivious Prompto guffawed in disbelief.

“Seriously,” Gladio flashed a predator grin, “Look on the bright side, you won’t have to worry about gift-wrapping anything!”

Unlike Prompto, Ignis knew a losing battle when he saw one, “You should consider wearing a more covert and appropriate attire, if you wish.”

“Yeah?” Prompto muttered, subdued but his interest piqued nonetheless, “like- like what, exactly?”

And before Ignis could offer his sound advice, Gladio butted in, “Well, you can’t go wrong with a maid outfit.”

Prompto swiftly vetoed the idea. Ignis, on the other hand, frightently maintained a quiet yet contemplative face.)


The answer to Prompto’s not-so-philosophical question varies time to time: it comes in the form of a photo album containing Prompto’s best shots of them together, handmade friendship bracelets, a date under the stars, and-- as Gladio proudly calls it-- his love and affection.

(No, Prompto does not want to consider a good head a birthday gift despite Noct’s reverent praise. Nevertheless, it does uplift Prompto’s spirits knowing that he’s capable of giving a fantastic head.)

Should he set another date with Noct? A park with some fishing spots will be sufficient enough, especially during the afternoon, right? Besides, it’s a good plan to keep Noct away from his apartment while Iris and Ignis prepare for the party later in the evening. Yeah, that sounds good enough.

A chime rings in the air as his phone buzzes in accordance of a notification. Prompto instinctively reaches out for the device but pauses before he can type in the passcode, squinting at the screen when he notices who exactly has sent him a message at six in the morning.

FishKing [06:24]: same

FishKing [06:25]: wanna be with you


No way. No fluffing way.


PromProm [06:25]: o

PromProm [06:25]: m

PromProm [06:25]: g

FishKing [06:26]: whats up?

PromProm [06:26]: whomst thou art

PromProm [06:26]: and what did u do with my bf ಠ_ಠ

FishKing [06:27]: har har

FishKing [06:27]: fear me for i am your worst nightmare

FishKing [06:27]: your bf is my prisoner now

PromProm [06:28]: lmao

PromProm [06:28]: i mean

PromProm [06:28]: no >:000000

PromProm [06:28]: what do u want u kidnapper >:(((

FishKing [06:29]: your cute butt

FishKing [06:29]: and chips

FishKing [06:29]: lots of chips

FishKing [06:29]: but mostly your butt

PromProm [06:30]: now?

FishKing [06:30]: yeah

FishKing [06:30]: wanna see you before specs drags me to space or sumthing idk


Huh, okay, that answers why Noctis, of all people, is up at an ungodly hour. It's so odd seeing the Crown Prince awake before noon-- or ten in the morning, to say the least. He must've done something to piss off Iggy; well, that-- or the Crown is out to get him for playing hooky.


PromProm [06:32]: u plan on locking my butt in ur apartment the whole day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

FishKing [06:32]: how did you know

PromProm [06:32]: a feeling ;>>>

PromProm [06:33]: i’ll be there in 15 is that ok bb (・・?)

FishKing [06:33]: def

FishKing [06:33]: wont leave ‘til 8 something

FishKing [06:34]: so we got 2 hours of us time

PromProm [06:34]: want me to pack for the nite?

FishKing [06:34]: very much

PromProm [06:35]: okie dokie

PromProm [06:35]: ily (*´∀`*)

FishKing [06:35]: xo


Okay, it looks like today’s plans are going to be rescheduled for another time; the house won’t clean itself, after all. Humming a delightful tune, Prompto springs out of bed and searches for the duffel bag he uses whenever he decides to stay over at Noct’s place. He doesn’t complain later when his cheeks hurt from the smile that never seems to leave.




Three knocks on the door and Prompto calls in a sing-song voice, “Honey, I’m home!”

There’s shuffling and a brief, reprimanding “Noct!” that originates on the other side right before the door swings open, revealing a bed-headed prince sporting the “just rolled out of bed don’t mind me” look. Needless to say, behind those ruffled bangs is a small, sincere smile that softens Noct’s early-morning grumpiness.

“Hey,” Noct greets, his eyes half-lidded since he can’t shake off the desire to jump back to the dreamworld.

Grinning, Prompto throws his arms around the other in a quick embrace, to which Noct all-but-happily reciprocates. Noct’s earthy scent-- a serene aroma that reminds Prom of the woods after it’s been rained down upon-- keeps him grounded more than he’d like to admit. “Hey, you.”

“Did you bring chips?”

Prompto’s smile immediately falls off, “Oh shit.”

“Seriously?” Noct feigns a scowl, but he can’t hide the fact that the corner of his lips quirks upward nonetheless. His minuscule smile widens when the blonde bumbles out a meek yet half-assed apology.

“Good morning, Prompto,” Ignis announces. Sure enough, emerging from the kitchen, Ignis-- and his ever-immaculate, fine-pressed suit-- walks into the blonde’s line of sight with a small smile gracing his composed demeanor.

“Morning, Iggy,” Prompto hollers before pulling away from Noct. Although the alpha has no qualms in expressing his displeasure from the lack of Prompto in his arms, Noct steps aside for Prompto and shuts the door behind him.

As Ignis makes his way back to the kitchen, he asks, “I assume you didn’t have your breakfast yet?”

“Nope, I did. Just ate some toast, no biggie,” answers Prompto nonchalantly while kicking off his shoes and dropping off his duffel bag in the living room. He doesn’t notice the way Noct has wrinkled his nose incredulously.

“Just toast?” Noct arches a brow towards Prompto as they head towards the kitchen. It’s hardly surprising to see the table set up with three plates and three pairs of silverware professionally lined up alongside the plates given the frequency of Prompto’s visits.

Either way, it looks like fluffy pancakes are the menu for the day. And as always, because Ignis’ been blessed by the Astrals with the gift of every single thing imaginable, the pancakes look downright divine. “Mhm, just toast. I ate too much yesterday, so I have to even things out today.”

He’ll run later once Noct and Iggy are out. He can burn the calories off if he pushes his limits. Yeah. That sounds like a good idea. He can’t afford to gain weight after all the hardships-- no, good sir, no thank you.

Prompto turns a blind eye when he spots Ignis’ disapproving frown and Noct’s grimace (it’s for his sake; it’s for his sake. He can’t disappoint his alpha-- he can’t). But even then, he beams at the sight of the table laid out before him, “Wow, those look great, Igster!”

The frown’s gone, but that doesn’t mean Prompto’s off Ignis’ radar just yet. “Thank you, Prompto.”

“Let’s eat! ‘M starving,” Noct says as the prince shoves the omega towards one of the chairs. Prompto, in return, shoves the alpha back in retaliation. They exchange a few more jabs to one another before Ignis politely breaks them apart.

“Indeed. I’m sure you would like to have more than toast for this fine morning.” A pincer attack from Noct and Ignis? How can he even stand a chance against that? Admitting his defeat, Prompto reluctantly occupies one of the vacant chairs and stares down at the sinfully-delightful looking pancakes that may or may not have fallen from another realm.

Will Ignis be mad if he doesn’t finish his dish? Hopefully not. Ignis may be a beta, but his dissatisfaction rivals that to an alpha’s. And if there’s anything Prompto can’t stomach, it’s definitely his inability to please those who matter to him (woah, back up. Now’s not a good time to get real, Prompto).

There’s a conversation floating around the table now, but Prompto’s ramblings are louder than Iggy’s chastising tone and Noct’s complainant voice. It’s only when a foot nudges itself on Prompto’s ankle did the omega snap back into attention, “Huh, wha?”

Why the attention is suddenly on him unnerves Prompto to no end, and he bites back a curse to himself for not paying attention to whatever it is that has both Noct and Ignis engaged. A concerned Noctis, who has mastered the art of concealing his emotions, gently inquires, “What’s wrong, Prom?”

“Nothing!” Prompto quickly stutters and eats a slice of a maple-syrup pancake with celerity. At Noct and Ignis’ disbelieving gaze, he continues, “Just, you know, thinking about… stuff.”

Nice excuse, doofus. Prompto comments self-deprecatingly to himself. Good gods, he can imagine himself in that meme where the house is on fire and the cartoonish dog, sitting in the middle of it all with a coffee mug in hand, says “This is fine” when, in fact, it is not (Oh hey, that’s actually a pretty good summary of his life right now).

“Stuff,” his alpha echoes hollowly.

“Dare I assume that you’re contemplating what disaster you’ll be brewing tomorrow?” Ignis inputs, his guess not far off the mark. Because really, it’s Prompto’s job to create a list of what mass destruction and outright stupidity they ought to do on Noct’s spare time. But after a Series of Bad Decisions™ that has caught the attention of the media and concocted a month-long gossip material about the prince and his sprightly omega, the list is now required to have Ignis or Gladio’s stamp of approval.

But that’s not the pinned priority in Prompto’s priorities right now; if it’s any consolidation however, that’s the second most important task he ought to tackle. “Uh, yeah! Just tryin’ to figure out what we should do tomorrow!”

Although his indifference makes it seem like the prince hardly donates his fucks to charity, Noctis sees through his bullshit, but after a considerable amount of musing, he dismisses it, much to Prompto’s eternal gratitude. “About that. Dad’s planning to take me on a fishing trip tomorrow afternoon.”

Shit, there goes his idea of a date. Oh Six, he has to go back to the drawing board again. He needs help, badly.

“But you’ll still be able to party with us after, right?” Prompto asks.

“Yep.”

“Alright. We’ll take our time preparing for the celebration then,” Ignis comments. “I’m certain young Iris has numerous themes in mind in terms of decorations.”

(“Is glitter okay?” Iris asked, wide-eyed and a hopeful grin glued to her face.

“No,” was Ignis’ immediate reply, because by the gods, he did not want a repeat of the aftermath when Prompto barged into the apartment with colorful glitter ablazing and thereby ruining the furniture and the carpet in his wake. “But streamers and confettis will suffice.”

Iris’ defeated look was quickly replaced with a gratuitous one.)

“I’ll bring the chips this time,” Prompto chirps with a cheeky grin, his legs swinging freely underneath the table. It’s a habit that no one has dared corrected after it’s been done for gods-know-how-long. “I promise I won’t forget them.”

“Just don’t bring the icky ones,” Junk food connoisseur Noctis Lucis Caelum asserts.

With a chuckle, Prompto points his fork at Noct and twirls it in a teasing manner. “Oh, don’t you worry! I’ll bring in the good stuff just for you.”

“Hey, wanna play King’s Knight after this?”

“Sure--”

But before any other plans are made, Ignis cuts in, “Noct, may I remind you that we are to leave at precisely eight in the morning?”

“So? I can get ready later.”

“Not with Prompto around, no.” Not gonna lie, Ignis has them there. Noctis barely obtains the motivation to do anything else if it doesn’t involve Prompto, should the omega be in the same vicinity as the alpha. That council meeting that specifically requests the prince’s presence? Cancel that-- beating the omega in Mario Kart is more important than listening to the dronings of Lords Full-of-Shit.

Henceforth, while the two are engrossed in their impromptu debate, Prompto pokes his fluffy pancake twice. The words Noct and present circle around his head and, no matter how hard Prompto tries, he can’t shake them off.

He needs advice from a professional-- someone who has mastered the art of courtships and romance. And Prompto thinks he knows who exactly fits that requirement:

Gladio.

Chapter 2: Or the Crown Slips

Summary:

Once the conversation has politely met its end, Prompto consecutively performs five things: he shuts his phone; releases all the breath he’s been holding throughout the exchange; finishes the entire bottle of Jetty’s in one go; and rests his arms on top of the greasy table as his eyes dart towards the window where there, he can properly assess what in Ifrit’s fiery ballsack just happened.

Notes:

Thank you so much for the feedback and kudos on the last chapter! I really appreciate that you guys are okay with dealing with my bs :))

I have underestimated the length of this fic oops. And here it is-- the second half that isn't a half because the first part has 3k words while this one has 6k words wowee. Also my eyes are dead tired, so if you see any grammatical mistakes, just comment it down so I can fix it :))

Anyway, let's go right at it!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“You sure you’re okay staying here the whole day?” Noct asks for the upteenth time with a furrow of his brows.

“Noct, it’s okay,” Prompto sighs, half-exasperated and half-fond over the inane dotting, which is laughable considering it’s usually Ignis’ job to do the mother henning. “Geez, dude, you make it sound like I’m your prisoner or something.”

Noctis huffs at the tease, rubbing his shoulder with a free hand. “If you say so. Closet’s all yours, by the way.”

According to Noctis’ dictionary, that roughly translates to “feel free to use my clothes to wear and/or jack off to.” Well, well, well, isn’t the Crown Prince just the sweetest guy to be with?

Prompto briefly wonders if his favorite Noctis-property sweatshirt is tucked somewhere in his castle-of-a-wardrobe until Ignis conspicuously coughs into his fist, “Please do mind where you leave your scent.”

“Ignore him,” is Noctis’ swift response; accompanying the statement is a glare levelled directly at the beta. “Do whatever you want. I don’t care.”

Abashed at the obvious implications, Prompto loquaciously stutters, “Oh, uh, sure. Don’t worry, Iggs, I’ll try not to make a mess!”

“That will be ideal,” Ignis replies, nodding at Prompto before shifting his focus back to his charge. Prompto’s gotta hand it to him: the advisor’s amazing at masking his impatience, considering that they’re supposed to leave, like, ten minutes ago. The door’s literally behind them, but Noct remains adamant in delaying the inevitable. “Well then, shall we, Noct?”

“Hold on a sec.” Now Ignis doesn’t even bother to suppress his irate sigh. Now before Prompto can say something intelligent and helpful like dude, any more and you’re gonna give Iggy aneurysm, Noctis yanks Prompto’s wrist towards him. The abruptness has Prompto reeling in, and Noctis seizes this moment to plant a kiss on the omega’s cheek. “There you go.”

The blush hasn’t left Prompto yet, and based on the sudden turn of events, it won’t go any time soon. As the blonde brings up his hand to caress his own cheek, he jokes, voice raised one octave higher for an extra effect. “Ugh, you’re so sappy, Noct.”

“You like it,” returns Noct. Good gods, this is what happens when they watch too many romance movies at Gladio’s behest. And judging from the Ignis’ weary look, both of them are topping the charts with their profound corniness.

Well, look here, if you put two socially-inept people who have no experience in romance and whatsoever together in a relationship, of course you’re going to get the front seat of a B-rated romance movie.

“Let’s not waste any more time, Your Highness.” Oooh, Ignis’ using the title card. Years of experience allows Prompto to recognize that as the first step towards regret. Before the omega can so much bat an eyelash, Noctis is being dragged away towards the door. Ignoring Noctis’ retaliation and creative insults, he hollers, “Have a good day, Prompto.”

“Bye, guys! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Prompto waves his hands with a dizzying speed as he watches Ignis pretty much wrestle Noct out of the door. Iggy’s surprisingly strong for someone who’s pretty much a butler; heck, maybe he can stand a chance against Gladio even.

The door shuts close with a loud thud; despite this, he can still hear the faint shuffling of footsteps and Noct’s voice behind the door. Sounds like Noct’s still upset over leaving Prompto behind. Ah, alphas and their possessive tendencies. With a shake of his head, Prompto bounces off towards the living room and makes himself comfortable on the couch.

Alright, now that Noct and Iggy are out of the house, it’s time to do the thing that’s been bothering him since yesterday and the day before.


SHRIMP noodles [08:15]: help me ( i _ i )

BEEF noodles [08:19]: nah busy right now

SHRIMP noodles [08:19]: please (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)

SHRIMP noodles [08:19]: i need your expertise (´;ω;`)

BEEF noodles [08:20]: go on

SHRIMP noodles [08:21]: romeo pls help me its about noct (´;Д;`)

BEEF noodles [08:22]: ah

BEEF noodles [08:22]: aight what drama should i be expecting today?

BEEF noodles [08:22]: noct being a dumbass again?

SHRIMP noodles [08:23]: ty much ( ;∀;)

SHRIMP noodles [08:23]: no drama this time

SHRIMP noodles [08:23]: just bday problems

BEEF noodles [08:25]: lemme guess

BEEF noodles [08:25]: you need help coming up with a present

SHRIMP noodles [08:25]: ding ding ding ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

SHRIMP noodles [08:25]: yeppers

SHRIMP noodles [08:26]: my gift flunked when noct said his dad’s gonna take him fishing 。゚(゚´Д`゚)゚。

BEEF noodles [08:28]: oh yeah

BEEF noodles [08:28]: rip you just got your ass beat by the king

SHRIMP noodles [08:29]: ikr (´;Д;`)

SHRIMP noodles [08:29]: that’s why im asking u

BEEF noodles [08:32]: just go with your plan b

BEEF noodles [08:32]: it always works anyway from what i hear

SHRIMP noodles [08:32]: what plan b and wdym “u always hear” (・・?)

BEEF noodles [08:32]: your annual blowjob?

SHRIMP noodles [08:33]: hEY

SHRIMP noodles [08:33]: IT ISNT ANNUAL

SHRIMP noodles [08:33]: WHO SAYS ITS ANNUAL

BEEF noodles [08:34]: thats not what prince charmless says when he’s drunk off his ass

SHRIMP noodles [08:34]: omg really

BEEF noodles [08:34]: mhm

SHRIMP noodles [08:34]: when???

BEEF noodles [08:34]: every time, crackhead

BEEF noodles [08:35]:always mentions how good you are too

SHRIMP noodles [08:35]: ok yanno wat

BEEF noodles [08:35]: what

SHRIMP noodles [08:35]: imma tell iggy to ban noct from drinking

BEEF noodles [08:35]: lmao good luck with that

SHRIMP noodles [08:36]: and imma put an end to dis annual bj

SHRIMP noodles [08:36]: just so it wont be an annual thing

BEEF noodles [08:36]: listen thats not possible unless you thought of something else that isn’t a bj

SHRIMP noodles [08:37]: thATs whY im ASkINg U (つД`)ノ

SHRIMP noodles [08:37]: i need to break this anal chain

SHRIMP noodles [08:37]: annual***

BEEF noodles [08:38]: see now theres a suggestion

BEEF noodles [08:38]: make way for annual anal

SHRIMP noodles [08:39]: glaDIO PLS

BEEF noodles [08:44]: aight gtg

SHRIMP noodles [08:45]: glAdIO doNT leAVE

BEEF noodles [08:48]: lets talk later blondie


“Should I feel betrayed by this?” Prompto asks out loud, uncaring if he looks like an idiot at this point since he’s the only one present in the living room. “Should I?”

With a sigh, Prompto sets his phone down on the coffee table and slumps back on the couch, eyes trained at the ceiling above.

Annual anal— good gods, Prompto doesn’t know whether or not he should just roll with it or punch Gladio in the face (and end up with a broken fist but it’s going to be worth it anyway).

Speaking of the man, guess he won’t be hearing from Gladio any time soon if the Shield’s got his hands full. The same can be said for Iggy as well (actually, Prompto has no plans in asking Iggy for help since the advisor’s already drowning in the other royal duties. At best, the omega can consider him as the last resort).

Maybe he should just walk around the city and find something that reminds him of Noct. Well, Noct is more than capable of buying everything he wants, but sentimentality must be a different story, right? That way, it doesn’t have to be expensive or anything (he hopes so, because his part-time jobs are barely making ends meet). Heck, it could be simple as a mug or something. Besides, didn’t he plan to run off the calories from the pancakes earlier?

Right, simplicity at its finest. Man, Iggy’s going to be so proud about his newly-discovered frugality. It’s too bad the beta isn’t here to see it though.




Given that it’s the weekend today, it hardly surprises Prompto when downtown’s bustling with life, especially when noon has nearly everyone searching for a good restaurant to dine in. For the last two hours, he’s spent window-shopping and ambling about without a clear direction in mind (that’s going to come bite him in the ass later for sure). Nothing has really caught his attention thus far, and if it did, it’s mostly out of his own interest like that chocobo plushie he can’t afford.

So here he is, taking a break at the Crow’s Nest with a bottle of Jetty’s in front of him and perusing the photos he’s taken with his ol’ reliable camera. His attention is focused on nothing but the device until his phone vibrates in his pocket, thus breaking his concentration.

Unless his parents have decided to end their month-long silence, there’s only two people whom Prompto has expected to message him at this time of day. As soon as his phone’s rested on his hand and its screen lit up with a push of a button, it’s safe to say that he can confirm his expectations.


BEEF noodles [12:11]: yo its lunch break

BEEF noodles [12:11]: still need my expertise

SHRIMP noodles [12:11]: duh yes :(;゙゚'ω゚'):

SHRIMP noodles [12:11]: really need sumthing better than anal and bj dude (´ー`)

BEEF noodles [12:12]: why not both

SHRIMP noodles [12:12]: OR anything that isnt sex ( ´_ゝ`)

BEEF noodles [12:12]: just give him anything if thats the case

SHRIMP noodles [12:12]: but its harddd ( ;´Д`)

SHRIMP noodles [12:12]: i really need sumthing that matters to noct a lot (*´꒳`*)

BEEF noodles [12:13]: your pics then

BEEF noodles [12:13]: wait scratch that you used that last year rite

SHRIMP noodles [12:13]: ye

BEEF noodles [12:14]: not comics

SHRIMP noodles [12:14]: o

SHRIMP noodles [12:14]: why not comics gladdy (・・?)

BEEF noodles [12:14]: call me that one more time and your bfs present isnt going to be the only thing youre gonna worry about

BEEF noodles [12:15]: also im giving him comics so dont plagiarize

SHRIMP noodles [12:15]: ughhhhhhh this blowss _| ̄|○

BEEF noodles [12:15]: then go with the fucking b j p r o m p t o

SHRIMP noodles [12:15]: iLL HAVE YOU KNOW

SHRIMP noodles [12:15]: that thERE IS MORE TO MY RELATIONSHIP

SHRIMP noodles [12:15]: thAN A sIMplE b L OW J OB oK

BEEF noodles [12:16]: then give him another fucking erotica


Prompto’s thumb freezes before he can vent out another response as the omega re-reads the text twice-- no, wait, scratch that, thrice.

How in the ever-loving fuck did Gladio know about that?


BEEF noodles [12:16]: his laziness read that godsdamned book faster than he could read Iggy’s fucking reports

SHRIMP noodles [12:17]: how tf did u know

SHRIMP noodles [12:17]: who gave me away

SHRIMP noodles [12:17]: is it iggy

SHRIMP noodles [12:17]: DID IGGY FIND IT AND TOLD U ABOUT IT

SHRIMP noodles [12:17]: DID U READ It

BEEF noodles [12:17]: woah chill

BEEF noodles [12:18]: i just saw noct reading it and got curious

BEEF noodles [12:18]: and no, i didnt read it

BEEF noodles [12:12]: i dont trust your tastes

BEEF noodles [12:18]: never even knew youre the type to read an erotica

BEEF noodles [12:19]: cause your attention span’s terrible

SHRIMP noodles [12:19]: thnx for the vote of confidence man

SHRIMP noodles [12:19]: so only u know

SHRIMP noodles [12:19]: not iggy?

BEEF noodles [12:20]: yeah just me

BEEF noodles [12:20]: why

BEEF noodles [12:20]: want me to spill the beans

SHRIMP noodles [12:21]: NO

SHRIMP noodles [12:21]: IGGY MUST NEVER KNOW


Prompto swiftly leaves his conversation with Gladio and taps one of the names on his list of contacts. Oh boy, Noct’s going to have a lot of explaining to do, because no one-- absolutely no one-- is supposed to see, much less know, about that crappy book to begin with.


Promegranate [12:22]: so hunn (๑╹ω╹๑ )

Promegranate [12:22]: why tf does gladio know about that book i wrote ʕʘ‿ʘʔ

Promegranate [12:22]: wasnt that supposed to be idk

Promegranate [12:22]: CLASSIFIED INFO that nobody should ever know it exists???? ʕʘ‿ʘʔ


Something’s off. There’s a nagging feeling that tells Prompto of how he has committed the worst mistake he has ever made in his entire life, but it’s so vague that he can’t precisely pinpoint on what it is. As he bites his lower lip out of utmost rumination and worry, Prompto glances up at the top of the screen--

And immediately realizes his mistake.


Promegranate [12:24]: SHIT IGGY

Promegranate [12:24]: U READ NOTHING

Promegranate [12:24]: OH GODS

Promegranate deleted a message [12:22]

Promegranate deleted a message [12:22]

Promegranate deleted a message [12:22]

Promegranate deleted a message [12:22]

Promegranate [12:25]: THERE IS NOTHING HERE

Iggplant [12:25]: Prompto.

Promegranate [12:25]: yes????

Iggplant [12:25]: Dare I ask what the fuss is all about?

Promegranate [12:26]: NOPE

Promegranate [12:26]: everything’s A-okay

Promegranate [12:26]: nothing here to see

Promegranate [12:26]: sorry to bother u

Promegranate [12:26]: thought you were noct lol

Iggplant [12:27]: I see.

Promegranate [12:27]: no u saw nothing

Promegranate [12:28]: omg just delete me already

Iggplant [12:28]: Gladly.

Iggplant [12:28]: I must take my leave then.

Iggplant [12:29]: Do remember to eat lunch, Prompto.

Promegranate [12:30]: haha yeah u 2 iggy


Once the conversation has politely met its end, Prompto consecutively performs five things: he shuts his phone; releases all the breath he’s been holding throughout the exchange; finishes the entire bottle of Jetty’s in one go; and rests his arms on top of the greasy table as his eyes dart towards the window where there, he can properly assess what in Ifrit’s fiery ballsack just happened.

Did he fuck up? Yes, severely so. Did Ignis really not see the accidental texts or did he turn a blind eye? Prompto may never know the answer; and such a conclusion scares the living daylights out of him.

How many minutes have passed after the misfortune text-accident is a question Prompto does not have an answer to. What he does know however is that at least three people have walked into Crow’s Nest. Now how he can correlate that knowledge in measuring time is another conundrum that requires more brain power than, say, just looking down at his phone to see how many seconds have gone by.

When his anxiety has dwindled down into a small-scale dread, Prompto gathers whatever remaining courage he has left as he carefully taps on Noctis’ name on his contacts. He checks the name twice to ensure that it is indeed the prince he will be conversing with and not someone else-- say, Cor (dear Astrals, now that’s a terrifying thought).


PromProm [12:37]: hunn we need 2 talk about the book :(;゙゚'ω゚'):

FishKing [12:38]: what book

PromProm [12:38]: yanno

PromProm [12:38]: THE book (・・;)

FishKing [12:38]: the fuck book?

PromProm [12:39]: yes hunn :(;゙゚'ω゚'):

PromProm [12:39]: the fuck book

FishKing [12:39]: what about the fuck book

PromProm [12:39]: you need to burn it (・・;)

FishKing 12:40]: wtf why

PromProm [12:40]: bc gladio and iggy know about it!!! 。゚(゚´Д`゚)゚。

PromProm [12:40]: and theyre gonna be mega curious and there gonna find that monster :(((

FishKing [12:40]: ok i get gladio

FishKing [12:40]: but why specs

FishKing [12:40]: pretty sure i don’t remember him seeing it

PromProm [12:41]: i may or may not have accidentally msg him instead of u (・・;)

FishKing [12:41]: the fuck prom

PromProm [12:41]: and thats why you need to burn it rn!!!

FishKing [12:41]: i’m not burning the fuck book, prom

FishKing [12:41]: after all the effort u put it in smh

FishKing [12:41]: how did you even know that gladio knows

PromProm [12:42]: pls i dont want 2 die bc of dat book

PromProm [12:42]: and gladio spilled the beans >:((

PromProm [12:42]: why werent you discreet at least ;-;

FishKing [12:42]: prom youre not gonna die on my account

FishKing [12:42]: and i’ll kill anyone who reads the book or see the pics

FishKing [12:43]: and its a good fucking book prom

PromProm [12:43]: noct buddy if that book so much goes out of ur aprtmnt im gonna be a dead man-- omega or not

PromProm [12:43]: if iggy doesnt kill me, your dad will

FishKing [12:43]: ok iggy might

FishKing [12:43]: but dad loves u too much to kill u

PromProm [12:44]: u sure? :(((

FishKing [12:44]: absolutely

PromProm [12:44]: ok i trust u hunn :;(∩´﹏`∩);:

FishKing [12:44]: good

FishKing [12:44]: so can i not burn the fuck book

PromProm [12:45]: sweet six u rlly like it that much

FishKing [12:45]: yes

PromProm [12:45]: ok fine dont burn the fuck book

FishKing [12:45]: very nice

PromProm [12:45]: in exchange u have to burn my nudes >:((

FishKing [12:45]: not nice

FishKing [12:46]: Im not burning ANYTHING prom

PromProm [12:46]: noct hunn pls :;(∩´﹏`∩);:

PromProm [12:46]: idk what to do if iggy finds both the book and my nudes

FishKing [12:62]: no one’s finding anything

FishKing [12:46]: i’ll hide it under the bed if I have to

PromProm [12:47]: dude iggy regularly checks under your bed :\\

FishKing [12:47]: oh shit really

PromProm [12:47]: yep (・_・;

FishKing [12:47]: ok not under the bed

FishKing [12:47]: in the drawer then

PromProm [12:48]: dont u have like a secret area somewhere

FishKing [12:48]: too far from the bed

PromProm [12:48]: how bout i just give you a soft copy

FishKing [12:49]: of both?

PromProm [12:49]: of both

FishKing [12:49]: ok sure

PromProm [12:50]: gr8 so does that mean u’ll get rid of the book and the pics? (・・;)

FishKing [12:50]: no


It’s a mistake to negotiate with the Crown Prince of Lucis, who is, with no doubt, well-versed in this field even if he barely participates in the debate club and maybe sleeps through the council meetings he has to endure. Prompto, on the other hand, barely stands a chance.

But he can’t give up-- his reputation is at stake and he might not be able to meet Iggy or Gladio in the eyes anymore should they discover that monstrosity. He values their camaraderie just as much as he treasures Noct’s.

Noct may be stubborn, but Prompto’s running on determination and monster energy drinks. He can’t call it quits just yet; there must be something that he can use as a leverage. Right now, it’s only a matter of what kind of upper-hand he has in his arsenal and how can he properly execute it.

This is going to take a while.


BEEF noodles [12:22]: prompto why the fuck are you panicking

BEEF noodles [12:23]: its just porn on paper

BEEF noodles [12:23]: its literally less obvious than a video

BEEF noodles [12:23]: and im speaking from experience here

BEEF noodles [12:38]: blondie you there

BEEF noodles [12:55]: nice

BEEF noodles [13:00]: break’s over. I’ll text you the next time i’m available

BEEF noodles [13:11]: yo can you stop sexting noct for a moment

BEEF noodles [13:11] because his royal jackass is looking like a dumbass right now

SHRIMP noodles [13:12]: oop gotcha

SHRIMP noodles [13:12]: sorry bout the silence big guy ( ´△`)

BEEF noodles [13:12]: its fine

BEEF noodles [13:12]: want a pic of noct getting an earful from iggy

SHRIMP noodles [13:13]: yes pls i need blackmail material rn (⌒▽⌒)

BEEF noodles [13:00]: you got it

BEEF noodles sent an attachment.

SHRIMP noodles [13:00]: tysm ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶




There’s a certain allure in Insomnia's cityscape that has Prompto’s trigger finger twitching on his camera every now and then. The streets are familiar to him, true, but it’s not everyday does he see a family of dogs sprinting about down the pedestrian lane. It’s also not usual for him to see a lone cat lounging about on top of a brick fence without a care in the world.

The first thing Prompto notices about the slim, white cat is its groomed appearance, befitting for a feline that has someone waiting for it back home. Well, Prompto assumes that it’s owned since there’s no way an ordinary alley cat can possess a well-maintained fur that may or may not be soft to touch. There’s curiosity sparking in the cat’s eyes as well, aimed particularly at Prompto’s direction while its tail flickers left, right, left, and so on.

If someone did own this cat, then it's incredibly lucky to live a life of luxury. Hell, it might not even be aware that it’s being pampered. In a way, it reminds him of Noct.

Prompto’s able to snap several pictures before the cat has grown tired of his antiques, stood up on its recumbent position, stretched, and sauntered off to who knows where. That’s one classy cat if Prompto ever saw one.

Hey, Noctis likes cats, doesn’t he? Maybe he can get one as a present? But he can’t precisely waltz into the apartment tomorrow with a cat in his arms since he’s more than aware of the responsibilities that come with being a pet owner. Tiny-- or Pryna, as Noctis once said-- has taught him that lesson well.

When Prompto returns to Noct’s apartment and sets aside his shoes, the omega jumps on the couch with little-to-no grace and whips up his phone for the upteenth time.


SHRIMP noodles [16:19]: is a cat a good bday present

BEEF noodles [16:21]: hate to break it to you blondie but we already have a cat

SHRIMP noodles [16:22]: (・・?)

BEEF noodles [16:22]: its overgrown, spoiled, and loves guys who loses his sense of direction when drunk

SHRIMP noodles [16:22]: hey im a cuddly drunk not stupid drunk >:(

SHRIMP noodles [16:23]: but do you think he’s going to be territorial when there’s another cat (´・∀・`)

BEEF noodles [16:23]: na, they’ll get along just fine

BEEF noodles [16:23]: on a serious note i’m not the person you should be asking about this

SHRIMP noodles [16:23]: yeah ik

SHRIMP noodles [16:24]: is iggy free rn

SHRIMP noodles [16:22]: dun wanna bother him too much

BEEF noodles [16:24]: looks like it

SHRIMP noodles [16:24]: okie dokie brb


Promegranate [16:26]: hey iggy

Promegranate [16:26]: i have a question

Iggplant [16:27]: Ask away.

Promegranate [16:27]: is it ok if I give noct a cat as a present

Iggplant [16:27]: An interesting question.

Iggplant [16:27]: But I doubt a cat would like to move in a garbage heap

Promegranate [16:28]: ouch iggy

Promegranate [16:28]: so no then?

Iggplant [16:29]: Not precisely. But I’ll have to consider this. I do believe that Noct will benefit from a pet companion. If anything, he will learn to be responsible to say the least.

Promegranate [16:29]: So???

Iggplant [16:26]: Expect a response from me later.

Promegranate [16:31]: aaaAAAAA

Promegranate [16:31]: thanks iggy :DDD

Iggplant [16:32]: You’re welcome, Prompto.


SHRIMP noodles [16:33]: he says he’ll think about it!!!

BEEF noodles [16:33]: good to hear

BEEF noodles [16:33]: so, no more panic buying?

SHRIMP noodles [16:34]: no. iggy might say no at the last moment so :(((

BEEF noodles [16:34]: sweet six

SHRIMP noodles [16:34]: a backup plan sounds good rn :((

BEEF noodles [16:37]: prom

SHRIMP noodles [16:37]: yes

BEEF noodles [16:37]: do you wanna borrow a maid outfit

SHRIMP noodles [16:38]: what for

SHRIMP noodles [16:38]: w8 dont answer im big dumb

SHRIMP noodles [16:38]: and no bc ew

SHRIMP noodles [16:38]: i dont wanna wear your nasties (c" ತ,_ತ)

BEEF noodles [16:42]: yeah thats fair

SHRIMP noodles [16:43]: dont u have something new? (。-∀-)

BEEF noodles [16:44]: wait are you pushing through this now?

BEEF noodles [16:44]: what happened to “not related to sex” gift?

SHRIMP noodles [16:44]: im lowkey desperate for anything rn :(;゙゚'ω゚'):

SHRIMP noodles [16:44]: but im not pushing thru with the bj cuz fuck u

BEEF noodles [16:49]: sorry i’m taken

BEEF noodles [16:49]: but i dont have something new

BEEF noodles [16:49]: iggy pretty much used everything

BEEF noodles [16:50]: oh shit

BEEF noodles deleted a message [16:49]

SHRIMP noodles [16:50]: GLADIO HOLY SIX

SHRIMP noodles [16:50]: R U BONING IGGY

BEEF noodles [16:51]: not saying anything

BEEF noodles [16:51]: i wont help you if you push through this

SHRIMP noodles [16:51]: ramuh’s ankle, WAT DO I DO WITH THIS INFO

BEEF noodles [16:52]: spill any of it to anyone else and I’ll make your training sessions more painful

SHRIMP noodles [16:52]: okay okay shutting up now ✌︎('ω'✌︎ )

BEEF noodles [16:55]: good

BEEF noodles [16:55]: anyway

BEEF noodles [16:55]: you still got time for shopping?

SHRIMP noodles [16:56]: just went out but yes??

BEEF noodles [16:56]: get yourself an outfit

BEEF noodles [16:57]: noct will love it guaranteed

SHRIMP noodles [16:57]: will any of it do???

BEEF noodles [16:57]: just make sure you’re comfortable with it

BEEF noodles [16:57]: or else sex’s not gonna be fun

SHRIMP noodles [16:58]: okie dokie thnx for the heads up big guy

BEEF noodles [16:58]: i’ll share something with you

SHRIMP noodles [16:58]: ( ・∇・)

BEEF noodles [16:59]: I heard his highness wants to see you in your uniform

SHRIMP noodles [16:59]: but i wear my uniform to school everyday (・・?)

BEEF noodles [17:01]: holy fuck

SHRIMP noodles [17:03]: oh

SHRIMP noodles [17:03]: OH

SHRIMP noodles [17:03]: i SEE

SHRIMP noodles [17:04]: I UNDERSTAND

BEEF noodles [17:06]: are you enlightened now

SHRIMP noodles [17:07]: y e s

SHRIMP noodles [17:07]: dude seriously thanks to the help

BEEF noodles [17:08]: dont mention it




It’s nearing midnight when Prompto hears the front door creak open, and that’s his cue to lie down on the king-size mattress without destroying the pillow fort (it’s definitely a pillow fort and not a nest) in the process. He makes sure that the sheets are covering his body twice before letting out a tense sigh. Sweet Astrals, it’s just Noct. Why is he being nervous about this?

However, there’s an aroma in the air that dampens his playfulness, its potency intensifying as the footsteps draw closer to the bedroom. And Prompto realizes that what he’s feeling now isn’t entirely his: it’s Noct’s aggravation and outright weariness that’s seeping through his scent.

Something happened during the grand ball that’s hosted in honor of the prince’s birthday. Whatever it is, Prompto needs to do his job as an omega. The sex’s postponed-- Noct’s emotional state is more important than some tumblings.

The footsteps cease right before the door and Prompto sits upright on the bed, concerned. When nothing happens for the past few minutes, Prompto tentatively calls out, “Noct?”

The door knob jiggles and finally, Noct stands in front of him, his eyes sunken and his slouched posture more pronounced than ever. His shirt (the jacket must be on the couch or something) is no longer fine-pressed nor impeccably clean; it’s remarkably human and, at the very least, unbefitting for royalty. Nevertheless, he frankly looks like shit, and that alone spikes Prompto’s worry more than anything. “Hey.”

“Noct,” Prompto repeats as he leaves the comforts of their bed and trudges towards his alpha, uncaring if he’s ruined his surprise. Settling his hands on the prince’s shoulder, Prompto nudges his nose against the other’s. “What’s wrong?”

“Just tired,” Noctis sighs, encircling his arms around Prompto’s waist and tugging him closer. Their noses bump awkwardly but they recover quickly enough with a chuckle. “Hate balls so much.”

“What? Can’t handle the dancing?” Prompto teases.

“Too complicated,” groused Noctis, who hardly complained when his omega planted a quick kiss on his lip. Prompto adores the small smile that appears after his little gesture. “Miss you though.”

“Miss you, too,” Prompto returns before pulling himself out of the embrace. He then tugs Noctis towards the bed, twisting away whenever Noct has attempted to tug Prompto closer to the alpha. “Ah, ah, ah, not before bed!”

When Noctis scowls, Prompto hardly holds back a snort before pushing the other down to the mattress, the pillow fort bouncing a little from the impact. Prompto follows shortly after, latching onto Noct with all the remaining strength he has left. As Noctis lets his hands roam around the omega’s body, he asks, “How’s your day?”

Prompto tucks his head onto the crook of Noctis’ neck and breathes in his alpha’s scent. Even if the alpha is relaxed on Prompto’s arms at this very moment, there’s still an underlying stiffness on Noctis’ shoulders. “Hmm, good. Went outside, played King’s Knight, snapped some pics, yanno, the usual.”

Noctis hums in acknowledgment, his hands now resting on the base of Prompto’s spine. That they’ve managed to reach this far without the prince making a comment on his attire or at the pillow fort (not a nest) speaks volume of his exhaustion. He does however mumble, “Sounds better than what I have to go through.”

“No kidding,” Prompto softly snorts while unbuttoning Noctis’ shirt. “You look like you could sleep for a decade.”

“If only that’s possible,” retorts Noctis, not helping with Prompto’s attempts to undress him out of the stuffy suit since his need for sleep overrides his discomfort at the very moment. Plus, Prompto's on top of him. No need to stand up when his omega’s stretched out on top of him.

Prompto also realizes this mistake and huffs, “Should’ve thrown your pj’s at ya before we crashed on the bed.”

“S’your fault,” Noctis chuckles, lifting himself for a short moment and allowing Prompto to remove his shirt and throw it to the floor.

“I know, I know,” Prompto sighs in mocking resignation. He drifts his hand down until he reaches the waistband of Noctis’ slacks and pauses for a brief moment. “You gonna handle this yourself, bud?”

“Prom, you’ve seen me naked before,” mumbles Noctis while sliding his hand up to the omega’s spine. Prompto doesn’t bother suppressing a shiver. “Pretty sure you can undress me whenever you like.”

“Kinky,” Prompto jokes, yet continues his task nonetheless. The belt’s tricky to remove given how Noctis is hardly cooperating the more seconds have ticked by, but it eventually reunites with the shirt on the floor and later the slacks as well. All that’s left of Noctis now is his boxers, but Prompto leaves that one alone. “There, all done.”

Noctis provides no smart remark, and when Prompto checks, the prince is, in fact, noctout cold. Prompto smiles and shakes his head. The things he does for Noct.

As the prince sleeps soundly, Prompto deconstructs his pillow fort (not a nest) and changes into Noct’s sleepwear. With the uniform’s been tucked deep inside his section of Noct’s wardrobe, Prompto clambers back on top of the mattress and plops down beside Noctis. He snickers when Noctis grumbles at the disturbance yet throws an arm around Prompto’s waist to pull him closer.

Oh well, there’s always the next night. And besides, they still have a party to throw for the self-proclaimed king of fishing. Although he does toy with the idea of what’s going to come first: the cat or the sex?

He definitely hopes it’s the cat. Prompto won’t hear the end of it if the sex comes first since Noct might request for a good head. He really does not want to hear Gladio’s smug I told you it’s an annual thing.

Sweet Astrals, he hopes Ignis can just say ah bollocks, all cats are lovely so let his highness choose whatever he wants or somewhere along those lines, and let Prompto pick up a stray and give it to Noct. Problem solved.

All this just to prove that no, there’s no such thing as an annual blowjob.

Gladio can suck it.

(Of course, Prompto doesn’t say this out loud at all because he loves his ass very much and he will do anything to protect it from Gladio’s brutish training regime)

Notes:

Initially, I made Prompto suffer a panic attack after he accidentally messaged Iggy and ranted to Noct. But then I stopped, asked myself "hey isn't this too strong for a crack fic," shrugged, and deleted about 1k words of hurt/comfort Prompto. Very nice. Actually, there's a lot of things that I want to write, but I decided to not go with it. Also I spent too much time thinking of a pun for Iggy's name and I don't know if I should happy or sad about it.

That infamous book Prompto wrote during his heat is untitled for good reasons. What's the content? Hmm, an interesting inquiry. :(;゙゚'ω゚'):

And that's the end of this little bday fic! Again, thank you for your support and I hope you enjoyed reading this mess. As always, feedback and constructive criticism are appreciated as hecc :))

Notes:

Ngl even I forgot that Prompto needs to bring some chips.

I'mma split this thing into two for no absolute reason. Worry not, though, 'cause by the time I post this, I'm already writing the second part. By the way, if you see any grammatical errors, feel free to correct me! As always, feedback and constructive criticism are sincerely appreciated! If you just want to scream into the void with me, then sure, go ahead! Thanks so much for reading though! :))