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Chapter Text

June 23, 2011
    Chaewon looked around the airport confused as where she was supposed to go. Her parents had dropped her off at the airport in LA and told her that she would be picked up from the airport by he grandparents in South Korea. However, they did not bother  to tell her what they looked like, as if they expected her to remember from when she was young.

 Chaewon was walking around the airport  in a foreign country looking like a lost puppy and despite knowing how to talk the language she couldn't bring herself to ask for help. As she was walking she heard a loud voice yell her name. Chaewon turned to face the owner of the voice and saw an older woman who looked to be in her 60s walking as fast as she could towards her. "Oh look at you! You've grown so much" said the woman who Chaewon now recognized as her grandma. "Come on now, follow me your grandpa is waiting in the car" explained her grandma before she could even say anything.

     Chaewon followed behind her grandma as they walked out of the airport and got inside a black SUV, where Chaewon meet her grandpa, who was smiling widely. Chaewon waved and whispered a quiet "Hello ". Chaewon looked out the window, staring at the tall buildings and the colorful shops as they drove by. She rolled down the window just enough to feel the wind,a small smile slowly forming on her lips as the wind hit her face.

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Chaewon examined the house of her grandparents that she would now call her home too. The house was like a small little cottage, 1 story, made of mainly wood and had a garden out front. Chaewon looked around at the houses next to them as she carried her bag of luggage inside the house. Once inside Chaewon admired the colorful decorations and furniture. “Your room is down the hall with a white door” her grandpa said. Chaewon made her way down the hall looking for the room with a white door that her grandpa had told her was her room. She walked inside a medium sized room, gray walls, a big window in the middle and a old and small bed in the corner of the room. 

Chaewon closed the door behind her and walked towards the bed. A small grunt passed through her lips as she let her fragile body fall down on to the mattress below her. Letting out a small sigh Chaewon began to think why her parents had sent her to Korea one day without any explanation.” They left you because you're a disappointment " she thought.

Chaewon could feel her small pale hands begin to tremble. A shaky breathe passing trough her lips. "Stop it you just got here " Chaewon thought trying to calm herself down.

 . Chaewon knew she would soon get a bad headache if she didn't do anything about it. She stood up from the bed and walked to the door of her room. With a shaky hand she opened the door and walked to the kitchen to get water. Letting out a sign of relief when she saw her grandparents weren't nearby, Chaewon opened the fridge and grabbed a water bottle form inside. Waking as fast as she could while keeping her head she made her way back to her room, entering it and locking the door behind her.

Chaewon want over to her luggage and opened it, grabbing her medication. With both the bottle of sleeping pills and the water bottle she slowly sat back down on her bed. Although the bottle said to only take two pills she poured about four into her hand.

Chaewon opened her mouth and put one pill inside her mouth, swallowing it with the water. And with the remaining pills she placed them inside her mouth slowly one by one swallowing them with ease. With the bottle of pills still in her hand she let her body fall backwards on to the bed laying down, staring up at the ceiling, waiting for the pills to take effect. And so Chaewon soon fell into deep sleep, the bottle of pills rolling out her limp hand, landing on to the floor with a small crash, spilling on to the floor waiting to be picked up by her. 

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Much to Chaewon disapproval she was woken from her peaceful slumber by soft knocking on her bedroom door. "Honey it's time to eat breakfast" said her grandma, her soft and smooth voice barely audible to Chaewon. Chaewon nodded her head as if her grandma could see her through the door. Yawning as she sat up and stretched, Chaewon slowly began to understand her grandma's words.

Chaewon's eyes opened widely once she processed how long she had been asleep for. Quickly overcoming her shocked state Chaewon stood from her bed and dragged her body over to luggage, to change from her current clothing. Grabbing a pair of baby blue ripped jeans and a black hoodie, Chaewon changed into her clean clothes. She used the hairbrush she had brought with her to tame her messy
brown hair the best she could.

    Once she was some what satisfied with her appearance she placed her hand on the door handle, opening the creaky door and walking out of her room. As soon as she walked out of her room she was hit with a sweet smell. Wanting to figure out what was causing the sweet smell Chaewon began to walk to the kitchen. Chaewon smiled slightly when she saw her grandma's cooking on the dining table. Her presence went unnoticed as her grandpa was to distracted by the newspaper and her grandma still finishing up the last dishes of food, humming a melody as she moved about the kitchen.

   Chaewon sat down a seat away from her grandpa who had finally noticed her. "Morning, how did you sleep?" asked her grandpa, looking up from the newspaper. "Good" whispered Chaewon barely loud enough for her grandpa to hear her answer. Before her grandpa could have a chance to speak her grandma placed a plate of food in front of her and her grandpa, sitting on the other side of her grandpa. Thanking her grandma Chaewon began to eat the pancakes her grandma had provided her. Chaewon being a naturally fast eater since she was little finished her food before either of her grandparents. Standing from the wodden chair she had been seated at she walked over and placed her plate in the sink. Excusing herself to go to her room Chaewon walked to her bedroom and went inside.

          Chaewon sat down on her bed, with a sigh. She couldn't stand being in a unfamiliar place for so long that still didn't feel like home, although she would had to get used to sooner or later. Even though she had her phone with her she didn't have any wi-fi at the moment , so she didn't know where to go to leave the house for a while. "I guess I'll just have to figure it out" she thought. Sighing she stood up, putting on her black Van and walking out of her room once again, with her phone in her left pocket.

Chaewon walked over to the front door, and with one hand on the handle she turned her head to face her grandparents. "I'm going out for a while" she said. Before her grandparents could argue she opened the door and walked out, shutting the door behind her.

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Chaewon footsteps echoed quietly as she walked on the sidewalk. It wasn't that she didn't like her grandparents, no she really was thankful that they had let her stay with them, she just wasn't that comfortable living there just yet as it always took her awhile to get used to new places.  And she always took to dancing or rapping as her way to escape from reality.

However, she didn't want to be rapping while at her grandparents house nor did she know where there was a dance studio she could use temporarily. So, she made that her goal for the day, to find a dance studio or at least a place where she would be alone and have enough room for her to dance. She continued to walk, looking around at her surroundings as she walked. She could see small shops opening for the busy workday, flashing neon signs that indicated that the shops were open, people headed for their work and the sounds of cars zooming past her, making her hair move ever so slightly from their speed. After what seemed like forever, she spotted a building that looked like a some type of studio from afar and once she got closer to it se was able to read a sign that said it was a dance studio.

Letting out a quiet sigh of relif, she clasped her hand around the door handle and pulled open the door before walking inside the building. Instantly she was able to smell a flowery smell that she soon recognised as lavender. The sound of a soft tune could be heard playing in the background. As she let her eyes roam around the room she spotted a nice looking lady who seemed to be no older than 30 years old.

Chaewon walked up to the lady who she had assumed was a worker at the stuido "Hello, is there a room I can use?" The worker looked up at Chaewon and then back at her computer screen. "Yes there is but you can only use it for an hour  " Chaewon nodded "Okay I'll take that room." "Alright then just go down the hall, its the last door to the right " Chaewon thanked her and walked to the room the worker had instructed her to go, going inside once she reached it.

Chaewon softly closed the door behind her once she entered the medium sized room. The walls were white and the floor was a light brow with a big mirror on one of the walls.There wasn't anything inside the studio apart from a case of water bottles in the far left corner. Chaewon made her way over to stand infront of the mirror, her reflection staring back at her. She got her phone out from her pocket and looked through her playlist for a song. After a couple of minutes of looking she found a song that she had just learned the dance for a few weeks ago. Setting her phone down with it leaning against the mirror she got into postion to start the dance.

Chaewon was immediately in her own small world when the music began to play. She moved around the room as the song  contuined to play, her movement sharp and powerful yet still gentle and detailed when they needed to be. She closed her eyes and let her body move along with the music as she danced effortlessly.

Once the music had stopped playing, Chaewon  stopped moving along . She stood there in the middle of the room as she caught her breath which only took a few minutes. She got back into postion to dance once she heard the next song start to play. And so she went back to dancing and continued to the dance without breaks but that wasn't a problem for her as she was used to dancing for hours, till her body ached.

Chaewon had just began to dance to the next song which had the hardest dance routine out of all the dances she did but it wasn't a problem for her. She had naturally closed her eyes to let herself just follow the flow of the music and hadn't noticed her hour was up and someone had walked inside the room she was in. They stared at her dance , analyzing her every movement and facial espression.

Once Chaewon had finshed dancing she kept her eyes closed, catching her uneasy breath. However, her eyes snapped opened when he heard a voice speak to her. "You have talent, would you be instrested in auditioning?" a male voice spoke. Chaewon quickly faced the voice "Thank you for the compliment , but what do you mean audition?" she asked. "Well our company is having open auditions in about 15 minutes and I want you to audition for us. i think you would fit in perfectly in our company" the man explained. Chaewon stayed quiet thinking about the offer before answering "Alright, I'll audition ". The male nodded "Please go wait outside with the rest of the people auditioning." Chaewon nodded in response before walking out of the room only to be greeted with a line of people from different age groups already forming. She quickly made her way to the end of the line as a few more people were arriving.

Once she got in line she began to think of all the girls and boys she had seen in the line, she thought they were all very pretty or handsome compared to herself. Chaewon knew that talent played a role on becoming a trainee but also looks which she thought was something she lacked. As Chaewon was think of all of this she relazing what her parents and grandparents would think about her auditioning. She knew her parents would be against it as they never supported her in any of her interest and she didnt know her grandparents that well to have an idea on what their reaction would be.

About 30 minutes had passed before she reached the front of the line. Chaewon began to try and calm herslef down "all you need to do is show them what you can do and wait for the the results" she remined herself. The girl that had been before her came out of the room, indicating that it was her turn to audition. Taking a deep breath she opened the door and walked inside the room.

When she looked at the judges she recognized the man from before who was now surrounded by other people. Chaewon listened to what the judges told her to do and began to introduce herself "Hello, My name is Kim Chaewon and I will be dancing and rapping. " She walked over to the speaker and connected her phone to it, choosing her favorite song to dance to, Chaewon got into position to dance. She took another deep breath and began to dance when the music started. Once she finished dancing she got a microphone from the staff and began rapping.

After her audition was done the judges thanked her and she walked out of the room, joining the rest of the people who had already auditioned. When everyone had finished auditioning they were all called back into the room where they would learn wether or not they had made it.

Chaewon stood impatiently waiting for the results. The girl that had been before her and a handful of other people had made it. Chaewon began to think that she hadn't made it when she heard her name "Kim Chaewon passed ". Chaewon tried to suppress the big grin growing on her face as she joined the rest of the people who had been selected and silently watched the others who hadn't been chosen leave.

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Once the rest of the people who had auditioned had left, the man from before turned to look at the people who had made it. Chaewon fiddled with her fingers as she and the others waited for the man to speak. "All of you who have passed will sign contracts when you come to the company, now will you all please go and get on of the paper on the table and answer all the questions on it before you leave. " Chaewon and everyone else walked to the judges table were the papers where and got one.

    She grabbed a paper and one of the pencils that were next to the paper and began to answer the questions on the paper. There weren't may questions on the paper hence why she finished answering quickly and went to put it back on the table where the filled out papers went. Chaewon walked over to the door to leave but stopped when she heard the man speak again. "Just so you guys know you will be contacted based on the information you wrote down on the paper. " She resumed walking out of the building once he finished talking to them. Once Chaewon walked out of the building was when realization hit her, she would have to eventually tell her grandparents about her passing the audition. She hadn't lived with them for even a week and she had already gone and auditioned for a company. Chaewon began thinking of all of their possible reactions to the news, getting nervous the more she thought of it. She had barely realized she had gotten home after a while from thinking to much about it. As she walked in she was greeted with the smell of her grandma cooking dinner and her grandpa sitting on the couch watching tv.

    Chaewons grandpa was the first one to notice she had arrived back home. "Hello Chaewon how was your walk? " Chaewon's grandpa greeted. Her grandma turned to look in Chaewon's direction once she had heard that Chaewon was home. Chaewon looked at her grandparents and smiled slightly at them "Hi, I'm sorry for the way I just suddenly walked out of the house and for taking so long to come back home " she replied. "It's okay, your still getting used to everything so it normal for your emotions to be all over the place " said her grandma. Chaewon nodded "I'm going to go take a shower before dinner " she said.

    Chaewon walked to her room, grabbing a pair comfortable clothes which consisted of  grey sweatpants and a white loose shirt before walking to the shower. Once she finished showering and getting dressed she walked back to her room, putting her old clothes in the laundry basket and sitting down on the bed. Chaewon didn't know wether to tell her grandparents today or wait till the next day. Her contemplating was cut short when she heard her grandpa call her for dinner. Chaewon walked to the dinning room where she saw the food her grandma had made set on the table. She sat down on a chair and thank her grandma for the food before she began eating. Chaewon smiled as she ate food, loving how it tasted. As she ate she decided to wait till the next day to tell her grandparents that she had auditioned and passed. Once she finished eating she picked up her plate and excused herself from the table. She took her plate over to the sink where she washed it. After excusing herself to her room for the night, she laid in bed for a good 15 minutes before finally falling asleep.

    Chaewon had a surprisingly peaceful sleep that night and woke up feeling pretty refreshed. She stretched before standing up from her bed to go to the living room and greet her grandparents. As Chaewon made her way to the living room she remembered she would have to soon tell her grandparents the news. Upon arriving at the living room she saw them in the living room talking to each other. She figured they had already ate seeing as they weren't in the dinning room like usual. She walked to a couch across from them and sat down on it making her presence known.

    "Good morning" ѕaid Chaewon. "Good morning, did you sleep well? " her grandpa asked. Chaewon nodded and took a deep breath "Grandma, grandpa I have something to tell you two ". Both her grandparents nodded and paid attention to what she had to say. "Well yesterday when I went on a walk I ended up going to a dance studio and auditioning for an entertainment company that was having open auditions and passing the audition. I'm sorry for not asking you guys for perimission first. " Chaewon said and looked at her grandparents for their response. Neither of them spoke for a few seconds from shock which made her worry. However all that worry went away when her grandma hugged her tightly with her grandpa following. They hugged her for a while before letting go and finally speaking "That's amazing! Why didn't you tell us sooner? " said her grandpa. "I was scared of what your reactions would be " she confessed. They both nodded  before hugging her again only less tightly this time. Chaewon let out a sigh of relief as she hugged her grandparents back, never wanting to let go.

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Chaewon had been anxiously waiting for the past 2 weeks for a phone call or email from the entertainment company but still hadn't gotten one which made her worry. She had never auditioned for anything before so she didn't know what was a normal amount of time to wait for the company to contact you. Chaewon tried to think positively but it became more difficult to think like that as time passed. She never showed her worry to her grandparents who she had grown closer with in the past 2 weeks not wanting to be a bother by making worry as well. Finally, when the second week of waiting was about to turn into 3, Chaewon didn't get a phone call but got an email instead. When she opened the email she saw that there was information. "Hello this is Big Hit Entertainment, all living arrangements have been made and we are waiting for you to arrive to the dorms. You will be told more information when you arrive at the company along with you signing the contracts. Please come to the company as soon as possible. Thank you."

She read the email before leaving her room and going to show her grandparents. "Grandpa, grandma look the company contacted me" she said as she showed the email to both of them. They read the email and smiled at her "This is great news! We're so happy for you" her grandma said. Chaewon smiled at both of the and group hugged them for a little while. When she finally pulled away her grandpa spoke "We should have one nice big diner before you leave" he suggested. Before she could reply her grandma beat her to it "That's a great idea, I'll go start cooking, Chaewon you can help me if you want" she said before walking away to the kitchen.

    Chaewon left the living room where her grandpa was and walked to her room, tying up her hair in a low ponytail. Once she made sure all her hair was out of her face, she made her way to the kitchen where she saw her grandma already working on dinner. She smiled slightly and went to go help her in making the food. Since both of them were working on the food, dinner was finished sooner than it usually would. Chaewon set up the dining table and served the food onto three different plates for them.

    Chaewon set the small plates in the middle of the plates that had all the toppings while the bigger plates were set in front of the chairs. She called her grandpa to the table and all three of them sat down at the dinning table. She thanked her grandparents nd looked at the food. Her and her grandma had made grilled meat and rice with different types of sides to go with it. She began eating the food  and her grandparents quickly followed. Chaewon was a fast eater and finished eating before her grandparents. She stood up and took her plate to the sink, washing it and putting the plate to dry like she always did.

Chaewon walked to her room, going inside and sat down on her bed. She checked the time and went to take a shower before it became later in the evening and got colder. She took a quick warm shower and soon finished. She walked out of the bathroom and got dressed into the night clothes. Chaewon finished getting ready for bed and sat down on her bed. She grabbed her phone from her bed and began using it.  The moonlight shone through the window, making the room have a bit of light. When her eyes became tired she put her phone down and closed her eyes, trying to fall asleep. She was tried from having done exercise earlier in the day and managed to fall asleep rather quickly. She had a peaceful sleep for a while before she began having a nightmare.

    The nightmare started of as Chaewon being back home in her room in the U.S.  It was quiet before she started hearing her mother and fathers voices near her room. She panicked and began looking around her old room for a place to hide. The voices came closer till her parents were both in her room and started yelling at her for no reason and calling her names. Chaewon  couldn't understand what they were saying very well and started shaking in fear as they kept yelling at her and throwing things that were inside her small room. She held her hands up in defense as she slumped down against a wall. Suddenly Chaewon woke up panting and on the verge of a panic attack. She curled up in a ball on her bed and wrapped her arms around herself as she tired to calm down. She trembled and  did her best to calm her rushed breathing .After a few minutes that felt like hours to her she had calmed down and slowly sat up, checking the time. She wanted to get her mind off of things and when she saw the sun was barely rising , she got out of bed and quietly put on a hoodie and sweatpants. She found a piece of paper and left her grandparents a note before leaving the house.

    Chaewon walked to the dance studio and sighed in relief when she saw that is was already opened. She walked inside where she was greeted by the worker and giving a room to use. She quickly made her way to the room and set her phone down, playing music. Chaewon began dancing which took her mind off the nightmare. Chaewon smiled to herself as she danced, knowing it was the only thing that kept her going.

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Chaewon had been at the dance studio the whole morning and a while into the early afternoon. She didn't once think about her nightmare while she danced . She danced her heart away and didn't want to stop even if her legs beagn to feel numb. Chaewon had finally decided to stop dancing when she remembered her grandparents and how they may be worried about her. She had felt disappointed in herself since she may have worried her grandparents from being gone so long.
Now, Chaewon was humming the tune of a song as she walked back  home, looking around as she did so. The cold wind blew slowly and she put her pale hand into the warmth of her hoodie. After a few minutes, Chaewon unlocked the front door of the house, pushing the door open and walked inside. She took of her shoes at the door and looked around. sShe didn't see her grandparents but  could hear their voices. Chaewon walked in the direction she had heard the voices from and saw her grandparents talking. Her grandma was first to notice she was back home and stood up, rushing over to her to give her a hug. Chaewon hugged her grandma back and looked at her. "Thank god your back! I was starting to worry." her grandma said "I'll get you some food just go sit down with your grandpa." Her grandma walked away to the kitchen before Chaewon could say anything.

She walked over to the table and sat down at one of the chairs, feeling guilty for making them worry. Her grandpa looked at her "Why did you leave so early in the morning ?" He asked. "I woke up early and wanted to do something instead of just sitting in bed all morning." She said, lying. Chaewon was good when it came to lying to others and it seemed her grandpa believed her. Just as Chaewon had finished speaking, her grandma placed a plate of food in front of her. She thanked her grandma and starting eating the food. Chaewon had a small smile on her face while she ate. "Chaewon when are you going to be leaving for Seoul?" her grandpa asked. Chaewon swallows the food she had been eating and looked over at her grandpa. "I was thinking of leaving tomorrow morning." She explained. Her grandpa nodded softly and ruffled her hair slightly "We'll support you in what ever you decide to do" He said. Chaewon smiled at him and nodded before she began eating again. After she had finished eating, she stood up and walked over to the sink, putting her plate in it. She walked away from the kitchen and went to her room.

She got a new pair of clothes which consisted of a black oversized shirt and a pair of light blue jeans. She walked over to the bathroom and took a quick warm shower, getting dressed in the clothes afterwards. Chaewon walked back to her room and and started packing her suitcase. She packed all her clean clothes into one side of the suitcase and gathered all her dirty clothes going to wash the clothes. Once her clothes was finished washing, packed it into the suitcase as well. The whole process of washing her clothes and packing her clothes took her two hours to complete. Chaewon flopped down onto her bed and sighed in relief. She was tired and didn't feel like doing anything. She slowly reached over for her phone and checked the time. It was the early evening and dinner wasn't ready yet. She sighed and put her phone to charge, laying her head on her comfortable pillow. The darkness of her small room and comfort her bed made her fall asleep accidentally and not wake up for the rest of the day

Time skip: Next day

Chaewon woke up to the sunlight shinning through her curtains and the sound of birds chirping. She groaned as she sat up and wrapped the bed sheet over her petite body. Chaewon rubbed her eyes gently and stretched her body. She stayed sitting on her bed as she slowly woke up fully. After a few minutes, she finally woke up and looked around, reaching for her phone. She turned on her phone and checked the time seeing it was 9:00am. She got out of bed, stretching once again and went to get new clothes to wear. She got dressed in a slightly oversized white shirt  and black jeans. Chaewon put the clothes she had previously been wearing in her suitcase and left her room.

     When she stepped out of her room she was meet with the smell of her grandmas cooking. She walked over to the kitchen and looked at her grandparents "Good morning" she said. They both looked at her and smiled softly "Good morning, breakfast will be ready soon" her grandma said. She nodded and walked over to the dinning table, sitting down on a chair. She waited patiently for her grandma to finish cooking. Her grandpa joined her at the dinning table and they both waited for a few minutes before her grandma brought them their plates of food. Her grandma sat down on the chair and they thanked her for the food before eating the food. The food was rich in flavor and still warm from only being finished being made a few minutes ago. Chaewon soon finished eating and stood up from the comfortable chair and washed her plate before putting it to dry. Chaewon walked to her room and made sure she had everything to take with her before she would leave. While she was checking everything she heard a soft knock on her door "Chaewon its time to go to the train station" her grandpa spoke. Chaewon grabbed her light suitcase and and walked out of her room, looking at her grandpa who was smiling at her. She smiled back at him and walked with him to the front door where her grandma was waiting.

    Chaewon got inside her grandparent car and watched as they got in it as well. Her grandpa started driving to the train station while her grandma told him how to get there. Chaewon got her earphones and started listening to music. After a while, they finally arrived at the train station and she got out of the car, taking her suitcase with her , her grandparents doing the same. They quietly walked to the platform for her train and she looked at her grandparents. Chaewon looked up at them and smiled softly at them.They both opened their arms for her and she hugged them both tightly. They didn't say a word as they hugged each other tightly. When they finally pulled away, her grandma held her hand tightly. "Promise me that you will visit when you can and call us when you have the time." her grandma said. Chaewon nodded softly "Don't worry I will" she said.

     Her grandma slowly let go of her hand when the train arrived and Chaewon smiled at her grandparents before walking away to the train. Before she walked inside the train she turned back, smiling at her grandparents and walked inside the train. She found a seat in the train and sat down. Chaewon sighed and put her earphones on again, listening to music as the train went out of the station.

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The train ride lasted about two hours till the train reached the station in Seoul. The train ride had been quite, only the humming of the engine being heard. Any other sound heard throughout the train was blocked out by her earphones. When the train arrived at the station, a bell rang signaling that they had arrived. Chaewon took out her earphones and put them into the pocket of her jeans. She stood up from her seat and tightly held onto the  handle of her white suitcase..

     Chaewon had a tight grip around the handle of her suitcase as she stepped off of the train. She looked around the station and made her way to the exit of the station. Once she was outside she was greeted by the sounds of people trying to catch taxis and cars driving by as people rushed to their destination in the early afternoon. She pulled her phone out from her pants back pocket and typed in the directions to the company. When the directions showed up on her screen she realized she would have to get a taxi. Chaewon held her phone tightly in her hand and used her other hand to call a taxi. After 2 minutes, she finally got the attention of a taxi and got inside of the car.

     Chaewon showed the driver the directions to the company and the driver only nodded in response. The driver was a elderly man dressed in a black uniform. She leaned back against the seat of the car and held her arm in her hand. It had started to hurt after waving it around. She gently massaged her arm till the pain went away, it thankfully going away pretty quickly. Chaewon held her phone and looked at the directions as the driver drove, making sure they didn't take a wrong turn. It took a couple minutes before they arrived in front of the company. She got her wallet from her pocket and paid the taxi driver the amount the ride costed. Chaewon quickly thanked the driver and stepped out of the car, holding her suitcase with her left hand. She stared at the company building and walked to the door. She wrapped her fingers around the handle and pulled the door open, stepping inside.

     Chaewon looked around and spotted a secretary in the middle of the hallway.  She walked to the secretary's desk and bowed. "Hello, I'm one of the people who passed the auditions." she said. The secretary looked at her and smiled while nodding. "Okay what is your name and where do you come from?" they asked. "My name is Kim Chaewon and I'm from Daegu" she replied. The secretary nodded "Okay your in the trecords as a trainee , The CEO is available take the elevator to the top floor the first door on the right is their office." they said. Chaewon nodded and bowed again before walking away to the elevator. She pushed the button and the sliver elevator doors opened. She walked inside and chose the top floor which was the 4th floor.

     The quiet elevator music played as the elevator rose, a quick ring of a bell rang when the elevator arrived at the top floor. Once the doors opened Chaewon walked out and walked down the hall. When she reached the first door on the left, she formed her hand into a fist and gently knocked on the door. She heard a quiet "Come in" and opened the door, slowly walking inside. She closed the door behind her and looked at the friendly looking CEO. He was sitting behind a desk and motioned her to sit down. She complied and sat down across from him, staying quiet.

     "Hello, My name is Bang Si Hyuk but you can call me Bang Pd nim, you will be staying at the dorms with the rest of trainees. Due to the cost of the dorms you will share a dorm with boys and girls. Are you okay with that?" he asked.  Chaewon nodded "Yes I'm okay with that." she said. Band Pd nodded "The dorm you're going to be staying at only has one person living in it at the moment. A staff member will take you to the dorm once you sign to the company. Now all you have to do is read through the contract and sign it." He said as he passed her the contract. Chaewon grabbed the contract and read through the rules and what she was agreeing to. She grabbed the pen and signed her signature on the contact, handing the contract back to Bang Pd.

     Band Pd checked the contract and put the contract away. "You can leave now. Ask the secretary at the first floor for a staff members to take you to the dorms." he said. Chaewon nodded and stood up from the chair, bowing. She walked to the door and opened the door, walking outside. She closed the doors and walked to the elevator. Chaewon took the elevator to the first floor and walked up to the secretary. "Hello, I was wondering if a staff member was available and could take me to the dorms." she said. The secretary nodded "You can wait here, I'll to get you at staff member to help." they said before walking away.

     Chaewon waited patiently and soon the secretary came back with a staff member. "They will take you to the dorms, you just have to follow them there." the secretary said. Chaewon nodded and the staff member motioned her to follow them. She complied and followed them as they started to walk out of the building. They walked down the street and arrived at the dorms soon. The dorm building was a small grey building and the inside hallway had white walls. The staff member walked up the stairs while Chaewon followed them. When they got to the 2nd floor the staff member stopped waking and pointed at a door. "This is where you will be staying with the rest of the trainees. I will leave you now, you will meet who you are sharing the dorm room with when you go inside. Here's the key to the door." The staff member said, handing her the key before they left.

     Chaewon held the key in her and unlocked the door to the dorm. She walked inside, putting her suitcase to the side and looked around. As she was looking around she spotted a male walking down the hallway. The guy stopped walking down the hall and looked at her when she walked inside, now walking towards her. "Hey, Im guessing your going to be living here as well. I'm your roommate. My name is Kim Namjoon." he said, showing off his dimples as he smiled at her. Chaewon looked at him and nodded, smiling back at him "Hi, my name is Kim Chaewon." she said. "Well Chaewon we have to share a room since the company can't afford big dorms. I hope your not uncomfortable with sharing a room. Chaewon shook her head "No i'm not uncomfortable with it." she said. He nodded "Okay you can go settle in, I'll be here in the living room if you need anything." he said.

Chaewon nodded and walked away, holding her suitcase going inside the room. She looked around and saw 4 sets of bunk beds. The room was small and one top bunk bed was taken by Namjoon as his clothes was on it. She sighed and put her suitcase next to the wall so it wouldn't get in the way. She chose a bottom bed from a bunk bed and sat down on it. Chaewon looked around at the room that she would call home on her journey to be an idol.

Chapter Text

Chaewon had spent the pass hour, organizing her things in the closet that was in the room. Once she finished, she took her suitcase out of the room so it wouldn't take up any more room in the already small room. Chaewon walked back inside the room and laid down on the lower bunk bed she had chosen. A tired sigh passed through her lips as she closed her eyes resting them. She don't keep her eyes closed for too long since she heard someone open the door. She opened the door and watched as Namjoon walked inside.

Namjoon looked at her and chuckled "I'm guessing unpacking tired you out." he said. She nodded slightly "I never knew something so simple would make me more tired." she complained. She heard Namjoon laugh quietly "Well I came in here to ask what you wanted to eat." he said. "I'll eat whatever as long as it doesn't cost to much money." Chaewon said as she sat up. Namjoon nodded "We can buy some sandwiches at the store down the street." he suggested. Chaewon nodded and stood up from the bed "Okay let's go there." she said.

     They both walked out of the room and put on their shoes by the front door. They walked out of the building and walked down the street to the store in silence. Once they got to the store they walked inside and looked around. They saw what the cheapest sandwich was and bought two of them. Chaewon and Namjoon spilt the amount to pay and walked out of the store with their sandwiches. They quickly walked back to the dorm and went inside their dorm.

     Once they were inside the dorm they took off their shoes, putting them by the door and walked to the kitchen. There was a few stools around a table and she sat down, Namjoon doing the same sitting across from her. Chaewon started eating and looked at him when he started speaking. "When were you born?" he asked "Oh I was born October 27, 1994" she said. Namjoon nodded "We we're born in the same year only I was born on September 12. " he said.

     Chaewon nodded "Then we should get along easily." she replied. Namjoon chuckled "Hopefully we will get along." he said. A peaceful silence followed after he spoke and they ate peacefully. Once Chaewon finished eating she threw away her trash and Namjoon did the same once he finished eating. For the rest of the day they spent their time getting to know each other.

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     The next day, Chaewon woke up when she heard her alarm on her phone going off.  She groaned and reached over to her phone. She turned on her phone and covered her eyes form the brightness off her phone while trying to turn off her alarm. Once she managed to turn off  her alarm she still heard an alarm ringing which was Namjoon's. She grabbed a pillow from her bed and threw it at him "Turn off your alarm" she said. Namjoon groaned when the pillow hit him and finally turned off his alarm.

     Chaewon laid in bed for a few more minutes before sitting up. She checked the time seeing it was 6am and had an hour till she had to be at the company. She sighed and slowly got up from her bed. As she was standing she saw Namjoon her down from his top bunk bed. She looked at him "I'll get dressed in the bathroom" she said. He only nodded and went to chose his clothes. She did the same and chose a loose black shirt and a pair of black shorts. Chaewon walked inside the bathroom and got dressed, brushing her hair afterwards, tying it into a low ponytail. She walked out of the bathroom and went to the kitchen, looking for something to eat. As she was looking she noticed Namjoon come out from the room wearing basketball shorts and a plain grey shirt and come to the kitchen in the search for food.

     Chaewon ended up choosing an apple and watched as Namjoon tried to make himself food. She stopped when she heard a knock on the door and then the door being opened. Her and Namjoon watched as a black haired male walked inside the dorm. They guy seemed to noticed them and walked towards them. "Hey, I'm Min Yoongi your new roommate." he said. Namjoon nodded "Well I'm Kim Namjoon" he said. Chaewon looked at Yoongi "And I'm Kim Chaewon." she said. Before Yoongi could say anything, Namjoon beat him to it "You should go put your suitcase in the room. We have practice soon." Yoongi nodded and walked off to the shared room.

Chaewon watched as Yoongi went to the room and then went back to eating her apple while Namjoon decided to just eat cereal. As they were both finishing eating Yoongi came out of the room, now wearing sweatpants and a white shirt which were better to dance in. Yoongi looked at both of them "Are we going to the company now?" he asked. Namjoon nodded "Yeah we are let's go" he said. Yoongi nodded and went to their front door. Chaewon and Namjoon followed him and walked out of the dorm. All three of them started walking to the company and Chaewon and Namjoon looked at Yoongi. Namjoon tapped his shoulder to get his attention and Yoongi looked at them. "Welcome to the team" they both said.

Chapter Text

They arrived at the company and walked inside the grey, building. After they were inside the building, they were greeted by the secretary. The secretary gave them each their schedules. Chaewon saw that she had dance practice first and made her way to the practice room. Once inside she realized that Namjoon and Yoongi also had dance first on their schedule. Inside the room there was no one else but a voluntary dance instructor. Chaewon bowed at the dance teacher and walked to the middle of the dance room. They boys followed, standing next to her.

     "Good morning. You guys will be a team of trannies along with anyone else who becomes your roommate." the instructor explained. They all nodded softly while looking at the teacher. "You guys may go stretch for the next 5 minutes"said the dance instructor.

They walked off, scattering around the medium sized room. As Chaewon was stretching she got to she what the dance instructor looked like. She was a female in her early 40s with jet black hair. Chaewon stopped glancing over at the teacher and went back to stretching. She did the usual stretches she would do before dancing.

They all stopped stretching once the teacher said to stop and went back to the middle of the room. They got into a horizontal straight line behind the instructor. The teacher began explaining the dance to them, repeating the steps to they understood. Chaewon got the hang of the dance quicker than the other two since she had a background in dancing. However, Namjoon and Yoongi had a harder time when learning the dance sine they never had experience in dancing.

    After a while had passed they learned the begining of a dance they had to practice. They were given a short break which they spent resting against the cold walls of the practice room. Once their break had finished they stood up and went back to practicing. The dance teacher had left and they still had a few hours of dance practice.

     Chaewon and the boys did their best when practicing the bit of the dance they had learned. She would occasionally help one of them when they forgot a move since she was more skilled in dance. They continued to do this till it had been 4 hours and practice was over.

     Chaewon leaned against the wall, catching her breath as she read her schedule. She looked up from her schedule and at the boys "I have rap practice next" she said. They looked at their schedules and then back at her "We have that as well" they said. Chaewon nodded "Let's go then or we'll be late. They all walked out of the practice room and down the hall to the studio. They passed by other trannies  who went to their next practice saw well.

     Once they were at the studio Yoongi opened the door to the studio and walked inside. The other two followed after him and walked inside the room. Once inside the room they saw their next instructor. They greeted the teacher and started the first rap practice. They all listened to the teacher and followed along. Chaewon and the boys took turns rapping a part of a song till they got it perfect. The practice only lasted two hours unlike their dance practice.

     Once they left the studio it was 1pm meaning they had been training for the past 6 hours. It was time for their lunch break and they went to buy something to eat. Chaewon chose a snack instead of a meal because they had dance practice soon after their break.

    They went to all their practice after their break. They went from dance, to language skills  and any other practice they needed to take. They worked hard throughout the day despite getting tired half way through the day. Once they were down training it was 8pm. Chaewon and the boys made their way back to the dorm and collapsed on the couch. They were all tired and didn't want to move. Chaewon knew she was covered in sweat and went to take a shower first. She had chosen what to wear which was a grey shirt and black shorts . She took a quick shower knowing the guys would want to take a shower.

     Chaewon quickly got dressed and left the bathroom. She went to their shared room and laid down on her bed. She noticed Yoongi had chosen the bed that was on top of hers. Chaewon laid down on her bed and heard one of the boys go take a shower. She comfortably laid in her bed and closed her eyes. It didn't take long before they had all take a shower and were laying on bed. All three of them now knew that they would have to get used to this routine as it was now their way of life.

Chapter Text

The next day, Chaewon and the boys followed the same schedule they had followed the day before. They went to dance, rap, and language practice along with other practices they needed to attend. Just like the day before they were exhausted when they finished training for the day. Chaewon, Namjoon, and Yoongi all walked to the dorms together in a peaceful silence till Yoongi spoke. "I don't think I'll ever get used to being so active." he said.

Chaewon laughed a bit "I don't think any of us will" she said. Namjoon only nodded in agreement and they went back to walking to their dorm. When they arrived to the dorm, Namjoon opened the door and they all walked inside. They were greeted by a faint smell of food being made. Chaewon looked around confused and walked to the kitchen. When she got to the kitchen she saw the back of a male with jet black hair. Namjoon and Yoongi walked over to her and saw the male's back.

     Chaewon walked over to the unknown male and tapped his shoulder to get their attention. "Who are you and why are you in the dorm?" she asked. The male turned around and looked at her "Oh! I'm your new roommate. My name is Jung Hoseok." he said. The three of  them nodded "Alright that makes sense, well I'm Kim Chaewon." She said. Namjoon waved at Hoseok "Hey I'm Kim Namjoon." Yoongi only smiled a bit at him "I'm Min Yoongi" he said.

Hoseok nodded enthusiastically and smiled at them. Chaewon could have sworn  she saw the room brighten up more after he smiled. "Anyways I made food for you guys sinc I wasn't able to attend training today" he said. Namjoon nodded "We'll eat after we take a shower since we are currently covered in sweat." he said. Hoseok chuckled and nodded "Okay, I'll wait for you guys." he said. They all walked away to the room and sat down. Yoongi was the first to go take a shower while the other two relaxed for a while.

     Chaewon laid down on her bed, not caring if she got her bed dirty and sighed. She did her best to fight back falling asleep . Namjoon had noticed how tired she was and let her go take a shower second. Chaewon thanked him and grabbed a random pair of comfortable clothes before going to take a shower after Yoongi had finished. She took a somewhat cold shower to wake her up more which worked. She finished her shower and getting dressed  after a couple of minutes.

Chaewon let Namjoon know he could go take a shower and grabbed a hair tie. She quickly tied her hair into a low ponytail and walked to the kitchen. Once she was there she saw Yoongi and Hoseok talking to each other. Chaewon grabbed a water bottle and sat down on a chair. She noticed that the food was done being cooked but they were waiting on Namjoon.

     Finally after a few minutes Namjoon walked out of the bathroom and made his way over to the rest of them. He saw to down on a chair and Hoseok stood up from his. "I'll serve you guys the food." he said, walking away to serve them food before they could say anything. Hoseok got them all their plates filled with food, putting down the plates in front of them. All three of them thanked Hoseok and started eating once Hoseok had also sat down to eat.

     It turned out that they were all quick eaters and they all finished eating almost at the same time. Chaewon looked around seeing everyone was done eating "I'll wash the dishes." she said. The boys only nodded in response and she stood up, stacking their plates on top of each other. She carried their plates with ease to the sink in the kitchen.

     Chaewon found a sponge and soap after looking around. She could hear the guys walk away to the room to go to sleep. A quiet sigh passed through her lips as she started washing the dishes. She enjoyed the peaceful silence in the room as she washed the dishes. Chaewon soon finished and walked to their shared room. She notice Hoseok had take the bottom bunk on the third bunk bed  and that the boys were already asleep and she laid down in her bed.

    Instead of falling asleep, Chaewon let her mind wander off and she started thinking of the way she was living at the moment. She started wondering how long she would be training if it would be for months or years.

    Chaewon wondered how many people would join their team and live with them in the small dorm. She thought of a lot of things regarding her training. Chaewon knew she couldn't do much about what would happen but put her dream in the hands of the entertainment company and hope they wouldn't crush it

Chapter Text

Over the course of 4 months, two new people had joined their team and had began living with them. Those two people were Jin and Jungkook.Chaewon had been surprise at first that more people had began living with them in the already cramped room. However they managed to make it work.

     They had been given a day to relax after constant days of not resting. Chaewon was currently resting on the couch, watching tv. Suddenly the sound of something crashing could be heard. She frowned as she stood up, looking around for what caused the sound. Before she could figure it out, the sound of rushed footsteps could be heard.

     Jungkook came running out of their shared room with Yoongi chasing after him. Chaewon raised an eyebrow in confusion as Jungkook ran behind her. "Protect me!" Jungkook said. Se had noticed J would always go to her for protection. She chuckled and looked at Yoongi who had stopped running when Jungkook hid behind her.

     "Jungkook stop hiding behind Chaewon" Yoongi said . Jungkook shook his head rapidly and stayed behind Chaewon.
She sighed and looked at Jungkook "what did you do to him?" she asked. "I woke him up from his nap" Jungkook admitted.

     Chaewon nodded and looked back at Yoongi "You can't chase him just because he woke you up" "Maybe if he had apologized I wouldn't have chased him" said Yoongi

"Jungkook apologize to Yoongi"

"I'm sorry Yoongi"

     Yoongi hummed in response and walked back to the shared bedroom, mostly likely to catch up on the hours of sleep he hadn't gotten. Chaewon turned around and faced Jungkook "You can't just hide behind me every time you do something bad plus your much bigger than me" she said."But it makes it easier to get away with things since the guys wouldn't dare to raise their voice at you" Jungkook said

     Chaewon chuckled and nodded softly "Well you do have a point there." she said. "Now if you don't mind I'm going to go back to watching tv" she saidShe sat back down on the couch and was quickly joined by Jungkook on the couch. She smiled softly at him and went back to watching whatever was playing on the tv.
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     "Dinners ready!" Hoseok yelled from the kitchen. Everyone in the house rushed over to the dinning table and sat down, pushing each other to sit down. The seating arrangement end up being Namjoon, Jungkook, Chaewon, Yoongi and two empty seats for Jin and Hoseok who had been cooking.

    Hoseok laughed at their actions and went back to serving them dinner. Chaewon stayed quiet and listened to Namjoon and Jungkook talk. Once the food was served, they all thanked Hoseok and Jin for cooking their dinner before beginning to eat the food.

     Chaewon being a fast eater only took a few minutes to finish eating. She stood up from her chair and walked to the kitchen. She made her way to the sink and washed her plate. She put it to dry and walked out of the kitchen. She saw that everyone else had also finished eating.

     No one said anything till Namjoon spoke up "So, who's going to shower first?" he asked. That simple question cause the rest of the boys to suddenly look at each other before they all raced to the bathroom, trying to get there first.

     Chaewon chuckled and watched them all playfully push each other, smiling. Even if things got crazy around the dorm, she still cared for all of them.

Chapter Text

Even if Chaewon acted like she was happy around the boys, she truly felt the opposite. She never really felt happiness and only felt the need to sleep and not move an inch. Of course, she never showed how to truly felt due to not wanting to be a burden to any of the boys. Plus she knew they had all grown to care deeply for her even though they hadn't know each other for very long and would make her take a small break from training if they found out how she felt truly. Thankfully for Chaewon she was practically a master when it came to hiding her emotions due to having to hide them when she lived with her parents,
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Chaewon collapsed against the studio wall, too tired from countless training. They were all currently in dance practice and had finally been given a break after 2 hours of non stop dancing apart from a few  2 minute breaks for water. She slowly closed her eyes and extended her hand out, trying to grab her water bottle that was next to her. She could feel someone placing her water bottle into her hand for her. Chaewon mummbed out a quiet 'thank you' before taking the cap off her water bottle and raising it to her lips, drinking the water eagerly.

Chaewon heard the sound of a low chuckle that was made by one of the boys. 'Slow down, I don't want you to choke on the water" Yoongi said. She slowly put down her water bottle and looked over at him and noddded softly. "Sorry I was just really thirsty.'' She said. Yoongi nodded 'It's okay, I understand all of us are all really thirsty and tired from practice" he said to her.

    Chaewon looked over at him and nodded softly "That's true, the instructor had us dancing almost non stop the whole time, but at least now we had a 20 minute break'' she said. She only received a slight nod in response from him but she didn't take offense to his lack of response, knowing he was tried just like her. She looked away and leaned her head against the wall.

Ever since she moved into the dorm it had become almost impossible to take her sleeping pills without having anyone notice since there was usually at least someon inside one of the room. Without her pills she found it hard to fall asleep some nights due to her head being full of different thoughts. Chaewon didn't feel comfortable just yet to tell them about her struggles  so she kept quiet and acted like nothing was wrong.

    Chaewon was quickly snapped out of her thought when she heard a new voice talking to her. She looked over at them and saw that it was Namjoon. She smiled slightly at him "Hey, can you repeat what you said, I didn't really hear what you said or asked me." She said to him. Namjoon nodded softly "It's okay, I had asked you if you were alright, you seemed more tired than you usually you" he said.

    Chaewon froze in place, not knowing how to answer him. She hadn't expected for anyone to have noticed how she really felt so she was schocked by his question. She hadn't noticed she had gotten lost in her thoughts once again till a hand slowly waving in front of her face brought her back to reality. " Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to zone out. Anyways I'm okay, you don't have to worry about me" she reassured him, flashing him the best smile she could come up with at the current moment. Namjoon looked unconvinced by her answer at first but he didn't ask her about it more from then, just nodding in response to her. Neither of them said anything else from then on and a somewhat awkward silence formed.

That silence remained till it was broken by Hoseok who spoke out of the blue. "It's time to get back to practing" he said. Hoseok was met by groans in disapproval in response. "Oh come on guys, we should start practing before the instructor gets back." They all didn't wan't to start practing once again but they all knew that Hoseok was correct. All of them stood up from where they were seated and walked to the middle of the dance practice room.

    Chaewon along with the rest of them got into position as the music began playing. They all started dancing, being mostly in sync the whole time, dancing with all their passion. As for Chaewon, she felt herself get a rush of adrenaline from beginning to dance once again. It was the sort of adrenaline rush that once it went down you wanted to collapse. She did her best like she usually would, putting all her energy in dancing despite the slight ache she could feel all over her body.

Once  the music stopped she felt all her tiredness once again. She had a few seconds to catch her breath before the music began playing again. And once again, the adrenaline rush came back, giving her the energy to do the dance and not mess up badly. This process continued through out the whole practice.

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    The whole rest of the day was filled with Chaewon and the guys doing their best and not showing their tiredness to the instructors. When the day was finally over and they could all go back to the dorm to rest, the walk back to the dorm seemed to take forever. Even if the walk back would only take a few minutes, Chaewon was practically dragging herself back to the dorms.

Once they got back to the dorm, Chaewon made her way to the couch and sat down on it. She felt relived to finally be able to rest. She closed her eyes and could hear the guys deciding who would shower first. She heard her name be put in 4th to shower which gave her time to rest. She opened her eyes as she heard someone walk to the bathroom and Namjoon, Jin, Yoongi, and Jungkook sitting down on the couch as well. There was a comfortable silence that formed  as they all got back some of their energy slowly.

Finally, after a while it was Chaewons turn to go that a shower. She went to their shared room and grabbed some clothes  before making her way over to the shower. She put down the clothes before undressing and getting in the shower. She took a quick shower as she didn't want to take to long and make the others wait for her. Soon she finished showering and dried off, getting dressed. Chaewon grabbed her dirty clothes and walked out of the bathroom, putting her clothes in the dirty cloths basket they had.

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They had all shower by now and ate dinner. They were all getting ready to go to sleep as they got onto the beds and all the lights were turned off. Soon everyone was in bed and Chaewon was getting into bed last. As soon as she was laying down comfortably on her bed and her head hit the pillow, she closed her eyes, She expected herself to be able to fall asleep instantly from her whole body being tired however her head had different plans than her body. Soon instead of being asleep like everyone else, Chaewon found herself tossing and turning on her bed. It seemed like her mind had all the energy in the world while all she wanted to do was sleep. She figured she could  take her sleeping pills to try falling asleep however she feared making too much noise and waking one of them up.

Chaewon soon got the courage to get out of bed after laying there for a good while. Slowly she got up from her bed and quietly made her way to the bathrroom. They all respected each other privacy so they all had their own bag in which they kept their stuff in the bathroom. She opened her litte grey bag that had a rose in the corner and grabbed her sleeping pills bottle.  She need water to drink them with so she made her way to the kitchen. They kept water bottles in the fridge so she made her way to the fridge and quietly grabbed one.

Chaewon had turned on one of the lights in the kitchen that was furthest away from the room and looked down at the pills bottle and water. She quietly opened the water bottle and then the sleeping pills bottle. She poured a few sleeping pills on to her hand and then grabbed her water bottle. She began raising her hand that had the pills to her mouth but stopped when she heard a voice. "Chaewon what do you think your doing?"  a sleepy voice asked. Chaewon slowly turned her head to look at the owner of the voice and was met by the sight of a now very awake Yoongi with his arms crossed waiting for an answer.

Chapter Text

Chaewon couldn't bring herself to answer Yoongi, to shocked to see him in front of her. She slowly lowered her hand that was still holding the sleeping pills and looked down. She was to scared to face Yoongi, to scared to see what his reaction would be.

"Chaewon look at me" Yoongi said. Chaewon shook her head, her gaze still fixed on the kitchen floor. She could hear Yoongi sigh which only made her fear for his reaction even more. It wasn't until she felt his cold hand grab her cheek and make her look up from the floor. But even with Yoongi's hand on her cheek making her look at him, Chaewon avoided looking him in the eyes by looking at the wall behind him.

There was a suffocating silence that filled the air quickly as none of them spoke. Chaewon looked at the wall as her fingers played with the hem of her shirt to call herself down. She let out a shaky breath and gained the confidence to finally look at Yoongi in the eyes. Yoongi was looking at her with concern instead of disgust like Chaewon had expected.

Chaewon felt a rush of relief flow through her body and her worries of his reaction slowly leave her mind. She stayed quiet and noticeably calmed down. Yoongi noticed the change in her mood and smiled slightly "are you feeling better?" He asked. Chaewon nodded "y-yeah" she mumbled.

He nodded "are you ready to tell me why you were about to take a lot of sleeping pills?" He asked, concern laced in his voice. Chaewon looked down at her hand that was still clutching the pills and slowly opened it. She saw Yoongi raise his hand and watched him take the pills from her hand. She looked back up at him slowly as he was putting the pills back in the bottle. She bit her lip anxiously before nodding slightly "yeah I'm ready" she said.

    Yoongi nodded "okay go ahead" he said. Chaewon nodded and took a deep breath. "i haven't been able to sleep and thought the pills would help." She confessed , her gaze shifting to the the floor again. Yoongi nodded "but why so many?, I mean you were holding more pills than your supposed to take" he asked. Chaewon glanced up at him and shrugged sluggishly "I was desperate to rest, I didn't think of how many pills I was taking or when I would wake up " she said, finally looking back up at him.

     There was a silence that followed before Yoongi suddenly hugged her. Chaewon froze, they'd never hugged before . "Look, I know we've only know each other for less than year and still don't know each other well but I still worry about you. Your not alone. You can talk to me" he said softly.

     Chaewon bit her lip as she held back her tears. her tear filled eyes on the brink of overflowing. She hadn't heard such reassuring words before and before she knew it she broke down crying. She hide her face in his shoulder, muffling her cries. She felt Yoongi holding her tightly, rubbing his hand up and down her back slowly.

Chaewon continued crying into his shoulder, her  sobs being muffled by his shoulder. She felt her body shake from crying but she didn't care and kept crying.

Slowly from Yoongi rubbing his hand up and down  her back she managed to gather her composure again. She sniffed as she slowly lifted her head and looked at him, being met with Yoongi's soft gaze looking at her. She took a deep breath and looked at him "I'm sorry...i got your shirt all wet" she whispered . Yoongi nodded "It's okay, you can't keep it all inside, you know. It's not good bottling things up" he reassured.

Chaewon nodded " thank you." Yoongi nodded softly "Your welcome" he said, hugging her. She kept hugging him, finding herself slowly calm down. Once she had fully calmed down, she let go of the hug.

Yoongi looked at her "you should get some rest. You can take the pills but only the amount your supposed to take." He said. Chaewon nodded slightly and looked over at the once forgotten bottle of pills.
She reached for the bottle, pouring out 2. She could feel his gaze on her as she did so, watching her every move

She grabbed the glass of water and put the pills in her mouth one by one and swallowed them with the help of the water. She put down the glass of water and looked over at him.

Yoongi smiled softly at her "Now let's go back to the room and get some rest" he said. Chaewon nodded softly at him and started walking back to the room with him. She closed the door once they were both inside the room, seeing that everyone else was still asleep. She heard Yoongi climb up to the top of the bunk bed and she sat down on her bed.

Chaewon laid down on her bed, staring at the wall across from her. She sighed quietly and felt her eyes grow heavy soon. She raised her hand to cover her mouth as she yawned, her hand falling limp besides her as sleep consumed her.

Chapter Text

Chaewon awoke feeling well-rested. Her limbs didn't ache and her head wasn't pounding the second she woke up. It was unusual for her to wake up with this calm sensation.

She slowly sat up, her eyes adjusting to the light in the room. It was only quiet, the usual sounds of her roommates getting ready for the day gone. Chaewon reached for her phone, panic and confusion filling her body as she read the time. Shit. She was late for practice. She tossed her phone onto her sheets, rushing out of bed.

"Woah there what's the rush?" a voice from in front of her said. It was Jungkook. Now Chaewon was even more confused. Why wasn't he at practice? Jungkook looked like he hadn't even washed up yet, eyes red from staring at his phone too long. "uh don't we have someplace to be?" A low chuckle was let out by Jungkook, "no silly we have a day off, jin should have told you. must have slipped his mind. " Chaewon felt relief rush through her body, letting her body plop back down on the bed. "where's everyone else?" "dunno probably out spending their day off" Chaewon help a thumbs ups and sighed. She didn't know what she should do all day. She groaned as she rubbed her face, realizing how chapped her lips were now that she wasn't freaking out.

She arose from her bed, waving goodbye at Jungkook as she walked out. Chaewon yawned, sluggishly making her way to the kitchen. She grabbed bottled water from the fridge and made her way to the couch. Chaewon sat down and brought the bottle to her lips, drinking half the bottle in one go. "slow down there, we need you alive" Chaewon jumped, looking around to see Hoseok laughing at her reaction. She sent him a glare, as she set the bottle down. "you're the one who's going to be responsible if you keep scaring me like that." He raised his hands in his defense "you know I would never do such a thing, I'm an angel" he said, shooting her a small smile. Chaewon rolled her eyes, stifling a laugh from his response. "So what are you going to do today?" "Not much, Jin and I might go out to eat later today, wanna come with?" he asked. "sure I don't have a plan for today, just let me know when". Hoseok nodded and went back to reading a magazine.

Chaewon stretched, her body no longer feeling tired. She didn't want to spend the day cooped up in the dorm. There wasn't much to do and as much as she liked her members, she could only spend so much time with them in such a small space. She stood up, looking over to Hoseok. "I'm going for a walk, I'll be back soon enough to go eat" Hoseok gave her a thumbs up in acknowledgment and she made her way back to their room. As she walked in, she glanced over at Jungkook who was nose-deep in a game on his phone. She walked to their shared clothing rack, picking up a beige hoodie and some black leggings. She checked for any stains and went into the bathroom. She grimaced as she saw her reflection, seeing how much of a mess she looked like. Chaewon changed into her clothes and brushed her hair. Once she deemed her appearance socially acceptable, she exited the bathroom. She put her pajamas on her bed for later and faced Jungkook. "Junkook" she called. No response. 'hey Jungkook." Still no response. She sighed, grabbing a pillow and tossing it to him. Jungkook flinched, looking up at her. "rude what was that for?" he whined. " You wouldn't answer" she shrugged. "where's everyone else?" she questioned. "Namjoon-hyung is at the company, working even on a day off, can you believe that?" he exclaimed. "As for Jin and Young hyung, I'm not sure. They might have gone out." he explained before returning to his phone. Chaewon hummed in response, making a mental note to check up on Namjoon later. She walked out of the room and to the door, grabbing her key to the dorm before leaving.

She made her way out of the building, onto the sideway. Chaewon had no idea where she was going, she just began walking. She slid her hands into the pockets of her hoodie as she walked. She stayed away from the busier streets of Seoul, not in the mood for rude people. As she walked she wondered how their debut would go. If and when they would debut. If they could reach everything they had ever dreamed about. If people would continue to join them or if people would leave. She hoped no one would leave, she had grown to care for them all. Jungkook was so kind and honestly attached to them all it was impossible to picture him leaving them. He was so young and cared about them all. Namjoon, Jin, Hoseok, and Yoongi were all people she could ask for advice as they were older. Speaking of Yoongi, she needed to thank him about last night. He was becoming like an older brother to her which she wasn't used to. Chaewon sighed, wishing that things would only get better for her and her teammates from now on. Even if she only knew them for less than a year, the bond they had formed was unique. Not many people are forced to live together in a small dorm and get along.

Chaewon looked around after walking for 15 minutes, realizing she had ended up at the company. She laughed quietly, realizing even when she wasn't supposed to work, she was still wanting to. She decided to go in as she was already there. She waved at the receptionist and made her way to the studios they were allowed to use. Today she would give her body a break, choosing to not dance and instead check on Namjoon. She stood at the door, knocking, and waiting a few seconds before entering. She saw Namjoon sitting on a fold-up chair and Yoongi inside the booth. She waved, standing next to Namjoon. Chaewon said nothing, waiting till they finished.

She tapped her foot to the beat of a song, most likely for their upcoming evaluation. Once they finished, Namjoon took his headphones off and Yoongi walked out, sitting on a couch they had cramped in there. "hey, why'd you come to the studio? I figured you'd go to the dance room." spoke Namjoon. " I went for a walk and decided to come here, what are you guys working on?" she asked. "it's nothing really, we barely started to work on it," Yoongi said. She nodded "maybe one day I'll learn how to produce or write, it wouldn't hurt to have more people making music" "why don't you stay to watch? see what it's like" Namjoon suggested. "Sure why not" she replied. They both nodded, returning to working on the song. Chaewon sat down on the couch watching. She didn't know much about producing, trying to follow along with what they worked on. The most she had ever done was write a couple of songs when she lived in the U.S. but that was it.

Time passed and it quickly became late. Namjoon and Yoongi were tired and Chaewon had started to drift in and out of sleep. She flinched at the sound of a chair moving, fully awake. "Come on Chae we're heading back. " Namjoon spoke. She nodded, rubbing her eyes. "hey Yoongi can I talk to you real quick?' she asked. Yoongi turned to her and nodded while Namjoon walked out, letting them be. Chaewon stood up and faced him. " I just wanted to say sorry for yesterday and that I appreciate the help." She paused and took a deep breath "You're like a brother to me and I'm glad I have you for advice and when I just need someone to talk to. I'm thankful for everyone on this team to be honest" She admitted. "Don't worry about it. I'm always here for all of you guys whenever you need me," he replied. Chaewon nodded, smiling at his words. "Now let's head back, we don't want to make them wait." She nodded and they walked out to Namjoon. The three of them made their way back to the dorm. When they arrived back at the dorm they saw Jin, Hoseok, and Jungkook sitting in the living room, waiting for them. "Great your back, now we can all head out to eat," Jin said when he saw them walk in. "Sorry about the wait, we got caught up working on it" Namjoon replied. "It's fine, come on let's go I'm so hungry" Hoseok chimed in. They stood from the couch and headed towards them as they walked out.

The restaurant wasn't far from the door, arriving in less than 10 minutes. They sat down and ordered, now waiting for their food. A peaceful silence surrounded them, the silence between them no longer awkward after living together for some time. Their food arrived quickly, everyone was now too busy eating to attempt conversation.

When they all finished their meals, they started asking about their day, everyone having stories about what they did with their rare day off. Chaewon leaned back in her chair, too full to engage in the conversation. She listened to their stories, making short comments on them every once in a while. She smiled at Jin's exaggerated way of storytelling, laughing at his occasional jokes. Chaewon enjoyed their company more than she would admit, refusing to boost their ego from it. She hoped they would debut soon, wanting to see how their future would play out.