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Chapter Text

1

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”

- Aristotle-

When Raphael opened his eyes, he noticed one green form leaning above him.

"Raphie! Are you awake?" a voice asked cheerfully. It rang through Raph's head. Oh, damn, Mikey, he thought. "Donnie! Sensei! Raph's awake!"

He could hear as footsteps were approaching him. Soon, two new forms blocked his vision.

"Raph, how are you? Does anything hurt?"

What do you think, Donnie?

"Ugh," was all he said.

"My son, I am glad to see you awake," said a gentle voice.

I'd rather be asleep, Sensei...

"Don..."

"Yes? Do you need a painkiller?"

"What happened?" he opened his eyes fully.

"The Kraangs! Bro, it was horrible! They outnumbered us!" Mikey whined.

Ah, really, it rings a bell. He looked over the faces. Donnie wore his doctor-face, he was ready to act, grab medicine, cut him up, anything. Though the image of him being cut up, made him cringe. But there was something wrong with him. Like Donnie was hiding something. Mikey grinned. He was happy that Raph woke up. However, Raph noticed something in his eyes. Something, that wasn't part of the happiness. Is he sad? Why? Do I look that bad? he frowned and looked at his father. His smile was warm, but the same expression was shining in his eyes. I wonder how Leo's looking at me. I bet he's not even smiling. He's ready to lecture me. He looked to his father's right, but there was nobody. Huh? Where's Leo? He started to sit up.

"Oh, easy, Raph," Donnie gripped him and helped him with this movement. When Raph was sitting steadily, he looked around. He's not here. What the shell? Is he that mad at me?

"Where's Leo?" he asked and saw as the others tensed. "Hey, I asked something. Where is he?" Mikey and Donnie glanced at one another dolefully. Oh my, he's not injured, is he? Or...no, he can't be dead! "Where. Is. Leonardo?"

"Well..." Donnie started. "We don't know."

"What? How can't you know?" Raph demanded.

"When we woke up, he was nowhere to be found. It was only you lying on the rooftop," Donnie explained.

"Then what are we waiting for? Let's go!" Raph was ready to jump off the cot, but Donnie's hands were pressed against his shoulders and stopped him.

"You need to rest, Raph."

"My shell! I'm fine! Just some bruises and whatever."

"And a big dump on your head. You have a concussion," Donnie said firmly. "Rest. After that, we'll go looking for Leo."

"After that?" Raph fumed. "Who knows what will happen to Leo until then!"

"Raphael, Donatello is right. I am not allowing you to go to the surface until you are feeling better," Master Splinter spoke. "Furthermore, it is daylight."

"But Sensei! Leo needs us!"

"I know. I am worried, too. However, we need to wait, my son."

Raph wasn't satisfied with it, but he had no other choice. He slowly lay down to sleep a bit, so his family can't say that he didn't rest, and then go for Leo. What a plan.

When Raphael woke up, nobody was in the lab. He sat up with the help of his arms and carefully rose to his feet. He felt a little dizzy, but it won't stop him from looking for his brother. He stepped to the door and left the lab slowly. He walked towards the kitchen from where he heard noises. He stopped at the door and cleared his throat.

"Raph!" Donnie jumped up. "You should rest!"

"I've rested enough. Let's go!"

"But Raph," before Donnie could continue, Raph interrupted him.

"I'm going with or without you guys." and with that, he left.

Donnie and Mikey looked at each other.

"He won't rest," Mikey stated.

"I know," Donnie sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Shouldn't we go after him?"

"We should..." Donnie replied and climbed to his feet. "Let's go"

It was getting dark, but it was still earlier than their usual patrol time.

"Raph, slow down!" Donnie yelled after his red-clad brother.

"Hurry up, guys!" Raph yelled back and started to run faster.

They were jumping roof to roof until Raph suddenly stopped.

"We were fighting here, weren't we?"

"Yes, we were. But it looks clean now." Donnie said.

"What do you remember, guys?"

"We were after a mutagen ooze when the Kraangs attacked us. We were fighting and I remember being hit in the head."

"Same here dudes," Mikey said. "They totally outnumbered us. And they have totally trained, 'cause they were so much better than last time."

"I only remember the start of the fight. What happened to Leo? Was he knocked down too?"

"In my last memory, he was fine and fighting," Donnie answered.

"Same here," Mikey added.

"We gotta break into the TCRI."

"What?" Donnie and Mikey shouted in unison.

"It's obvious: the Kraangs kidnapped Leo and now he's being held in the TCRI. Where else could he be?"

"Perhaps..." No, no. It's better not to think about it, Donnie thought.

"Perhaps what?" Raph asked.

"Nothing," Donnie replied hastily.

"Donnie. I strongly advise you to tell us what you're thinking of before I beat it out of you."

Donnie gulped and looked away.

"Donatello," Raph warned him in a dangerously low tone.

"I just thought about what if the Kraangs gave Leo to the... Shredder."

"The Shredder? Oh no!" Mikey shouted.

"Because the Kraangs are Shredder's allies," Donnie continued. "And Shredder hates us, especially Leo, since he's the leader, and perhaps he believes that he can get us and Master Splinter by Leo being the bait."

"So... what now?" Mikey asked.

"Let's start with the TCRI?" Donnie looked at Raph questioningly.

"Let's start with the TCRI," Raph nodded.

"It's getting light," Donnie said. "We should head home."

"But we haven't checked Shredder's lair yet," Raph replied.

"We have no time for it now. We can come back at night."

"Leo has no time for waiting!" Raph said louder.

"Donnie's right, Raph," Mikey spoke calmly. "We can be easily seen. Plus, I guess, Master Splinter is already mad at us for coming up without his permission."

Raph clenched his fists and turned around. He looked at the high buildings in front of him and watched as the Sun started to wake the city up.

"Raph?" Mikey asked uncertainly.

Raphael released a sigh, as he turned to his brothers. "Alright, let's go home." He didn't want to, he didn't like it, but he had to accept his defeat.

The road seemed extremely long and quiet to the turtles. Raphael's head was throbbing and his whole body was praying for a little rest. Raph knew that he needed to sleep, but this was the last thing he wanted to do. He had to find his brother! No matter what!

Donatello's face showed concern. He was anxious about his brother's wellbeing. When he realized his older brother wasn't with them on that roof, he started to panic. He was the first who wake up. As the family doctor and genius, he felt ashamed that he didn't know what to do. But then, Mikey opened his eyes, and he pulled out his calm face and covered his fearful one. He had to support Mikey, both physically and mentally.

Michelangelo didn't notice at first. He saw the slightly injured Donnie who immediately helped him up. Then, Raph's unmoving body caught his attention. His stomach twisted as he was approaching his strong big brother who was lying helplessly and unconsciously. But he believed that Raph would be fine. He planned to bake a pizza for his brothers at home. As he helped Donnie to lift Raph up, the thought came to his mind: why wasn't Leo helping?

"You won't help, Leo?" he asked half-teasingly, half-seriously. But Leo didn't answer.

"He's not here, Mikey," Donnie replied.

"Where is he? Did he go for help?"

"No..." Donnie sighed sorrowfully. "He disappeared."

And at this moment, he lost his appetite.

The boys were frustrated as they got home. But this disappointment turned into slight fear when they saw their father at the entrance.

"Um, Sensei!" Donnie exclaimed. "Why aren't you sleeping?"

"Why were you not in the lair?" he asked angrily.

"Well, Sensei, we were... um..."

"We were looking for Leo," Raph interrupted his purple-clad brother.

"Why did you not inform me about this?"

"Raph just ran off and we had to follow him," Mikey said. Raph snapped his head towards him, narrowed his eyes, and crossed his arms.

"Well yeah, since nobody cared to find Leo. Somebody had to do it!"

"Raph, we want to find Leo just like you, but you were and still are injured. And we weren't in our best shape either. We needed time to recover," Donnie snapped back.

"So you just want to sit here, watching TV and eating pizza, while Leo's being tortured and who knows what the Shredder is doing with him right now!" Raph yelled.

"The Shredder?" Master Splinter's eyes grow wide.

"We didn't find Leo at the TCRI. So, we thought, perhaps the Kraangs gave Leo to the Shredder," Donnie explained.

Suddenly, the old rat felt sick. He was already worried about what the Kraangs wanted to do with his son, but now, that he learned, that his precious, beloved son might be at the Shredders... he wanted to run to the Shredder's hideout and protect his baby boy, but he couldn't. He had to keep his sanity and give wise advice to his sons.

"Go and rest now, my sons," He said finally. "We will continue the searching tomorrow."

Now, they didn't protest and actually obeyed their father.

'We are going to find you, Leonardo.'

Chapter Text

2

“Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is enlightenment.”

-Lao Tzu-

What happened?

A low moan escaped his throat as he tried to open his eyes. He expected the light to burn his eyes, but instead of that, the darkness filled his vision. For a minute, he panicked. Did he go blind? He jolted up to a sitting position, but he quickly regretted it when the pain raced through his body. He jerked his hand to his left side, and he felt as the blood flowed over his fingers.

"What the...?" his hoarse voice came as a whisper. He lifted his gaze and blinked a few times. Suddenly, he noticed some boxes surrounding him. He sighed in relief. He wasn't blind! A large gray drapery hid the broken window. Leo crawled to the closest box, and with the help of it, he stood up. This action was painful, and he hissed, while he was trying to steady himself. He stepped to the wall and walked towards the window. When he reached it, he drew the curtain and looked out. He could see well, though the Sun was hidden behind the dark orange clouds. It was like the air got infected by a deadly disease.

"Where am I?" he wondered aloud. He bent his eye ridges, and with the wall's support, he walked to the wooden door. As he stepped in front of it, he took a deep breath, and with a shift move, he pushed the door open. As soon as he left the old building, and the strange light touched his body, he took a closer look at his wound. He was relieved to see that it wasn't as bad as he thought at first. But it needed treatment. By who? He had no idea where he was, and he had to admit, he wasn't the best doctor in the world. But he couldn't let it go worse, he had to prevent the infection, if it wasn't too late. But how? With what?

He felt dizzy. It was a long day, definitely. Although, he didn't even remember what had happened. After a few footfalls, he fell onto his knees. A little rest won't hurt, he thought.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Leo jumped up, startled, and fell onto his shell. Ouch! He didn't have time to cry over his pain and discomfort, he had to get away. Immediately!

Suddenly, a figure ran to him, grabbed his left arm, and dragged him behind the building. He opened a trapdoor on the ground and pushed Leo in. The stranger followed him down on the ladder. The door was closed, and the two creatures stood in the middle of the... well, Leo didn't know. It was dark again.

BOOM!

The floor shook a little.

"They will go away soon," a deep voice said.

"Who are they?" Leo asked quietly.

"Soldiers," he sighed.

"Who are you?"

"It doesn't matter."

"But still... you saved me."

"Well... you can call me Tequila," his voice was full of resignation and hidden sadness. "If you want."

"Okkkaayyy," Leo started uncertainly. “I’m-“

“Shh!” Tequila hushed him as he focused on the sounds.

A few minutes later, Leo dared to ask. "So... can we turn on the lights or something?"

"Oh, I totally forgot about that," he replied a little bit surprised.

"How? You open your eyes and see the darkness. How could you forget that it's dark here?" Leo asked wonderingly.

"I open my eyes and see the darkness, as you said. This is what I see every day," he answered bitterly.

"You, you mean...?"

"I'm blind, yes."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay," he thought for a moment. "Are you a mutant?"

Leo jerked his head towards the direction he thought Tequila was. "Y-yes."

"You don't have to be afraid. I am one too. Judging by your smell and skin, you are a reptile, aren't you?"

"Yes, I'm a mutant turtle," Leo answered, proudly.

"Turtle, huh," Tequila huffed.

"What, What's wrong?" he asked worriedly.

Tequila didn't answer. He was listening to something else. For a minute, silence settled over them.

"Let's go," he said and started to climb up the ladder. Leo followed him closely, he didn't want to get lost. Soon, the trapdoor was opened again, and the bigger man jumped out and pulled the smaller one out. "They are gone."

Leo looked up and down at him. He was tall like really tall. Leo didn't even reach his shoulders, though it wasn't too far from Leo's head, still, Leo's neck cracked when he looked at his face. What caught his attention first was the huge and deep scars all over his head. He cringed when he thought about how he could got them. Tequila was wearing black glasses. They were between the sunglasses and the goggles. He had a long, black pea coat. Leo noticed the swords hanging on his side. Then, he remembered. Where were his swords? They weren't on his shell, and he didn't see them after he woke up. Where did he leave them?

He brushed the thought off, he can find them later. He looked at the man again. He had green skin, scales, and no hair. Tequila was a reptile too, it wasn't a question. But what kind of reptile? He didn't have a tail, or if he did, it wasn't long. He couldn't see his chest because of the coat, and his hands were hidden in his pockets.

"Why are you staring at me?" he asked suddenly. Leo was uprooted from his thoughts, and a little "huh?" came out of his mouth. "Am I this beautiful?" his sarcastic voice ended with a sardonic chuckle.

"No. I mean not that you're ugly, but not that you are beautiful, I mean, you look good, no, I didn't mean it that way, don't get me wrong, I'm not gay, just, um," Leo gabbled nervously.

"It's okay, kid, I was just joking," Tequila let small laughter to escape. "Anyway, you are too young for me," he smirked, then turned around. "Follow me," he continued in a serious tone. "You need some fixing."

While Tequila was heading somewhere, at a rapid pace, Leo was trying to keep up. When he managed to reach him, he asked.

"Where are we going?"

"To my hideout," he said and turned left. As Leo looked around, he could see that there was nobody on the streets. It was daylight, and he could walk around with another mutant, and nobody was there to be shocked. What the shell?

"So, do you trust me?"

"I don't trust you," he turned right. "But it would be a shame if you bleed to death at this young age."

Soon, they arrived at an empty building. Tequila conducted Leo to a door that hid the stairs, which was leading them down. As their feet touched the ground, Tequila turned the lights on for Leo. They were in a quite big room. There was a couch, in front of it was a coffee table, and next to the table, a bigger desk. On it was a small TV, and a radio. Next to the 'living room' was the 'kitchen', a table, three chairs, oven, sink, and a few shelves with plates and glasses. Nearby was the miniature fridge. Leo followed Tequila to the double door, which was after the kitchen. The older opened it and let Leo in. This room was bigger than the first one. It was some kind of lab. As he looked around, he noticed things that he'd seen before in Donnie's lab. Though it was a cool lab, it wasn't as cool as Donnie's. There were two beds in the room. One of them was a cot, and the other one was normal. Behind the normal bed was an empty space.

"Why is it there empty?" Leo asked.

"I needed a place to train. It's not big, but more than nothing," he said. "Now, get on the cot."

Leo did as he was told, and Tequila sat in front of him on a chair, cleaned and stitched up his wound, then bandaged it.

"Sorry, I don't have painkillers now."

"It's okay, I don't need them," Leo reassured him.

"Playing the tough guy, huh?" Tequila smirked, then stood up. "Now rest, kid," and with that, he left the lab. Leo lay down and stared at the ceiling.

"How did I get here?" he wondered aloud, still quietly. "Why can't I remember? Perhaps I hit my head," he rubbed the back of his head and felt a little bump on it, but it was barely noticeable. "Why didn't I noticed this? Well... I didn't really have time to check myself everywhere."

After some time, Tequila entered the lab to check on Leo.

"Are you awake, kid?"

"Yes," Leo said and sat up. His wound was bothering him, but it was bearable.

"Come out, there's some sushi on the table, waiting for you."

Sushi. Oh, he didn't even know when the last time was when he ate sushi. His brothers weren't fond of it.

After he finished, the older asked if he liked it. Leo nodded with his mouth full. Tequila stepped towards him when he got no reply.

"Kid?"

Leo jerked his head up, and for a minute he was surprised, but then, he realized, that the nodding wasn't the best answer.

"Ah, yes, I love it. I'm sorry, but I forgot that you're y'know, and I nodded," he ducked his head a little.

"Don't be afraid of the b-word. You can say that I'm blind. Anyway, I'm glad you like it because I have plenty of them in the fridge."

"In the fridge? I thought it's not good to keep sushi in it for long."

"Indeed. But I don't have any other choice. It's a miracle to get some food," Tequila unbuttoned his coat and pulled it away from his chest. It immediately caught Leo's attention. A plastron! Tequila's a turtle! He was happy about it, but the nasty, wide, and long scars made him wince. He tried to focus on the fact, that he's a turtle, not on the several scars he had.

"Are you a turtle, too?" Leo asked excitedly.

"Yes..." he sighed.

"Why didn't you tell me? That's great! I didn't know there were other turtles too!" Leo spoke grinning.

"Neither did I," Leo smile faded when he heard the older one’s sad voice. Suddenly, a question popped into his mind that he'd been curious about.

"I wanted to ask before... what is this place? What happened here?" Leo asked while he was walking towards the sink.

"You don't know?" Tequila asked surprisedly. "Is it your first time on the surface?"

"No, no. I just don't know this place. I don't even know how I got here," Leo put his plate into the sink, then went back to his seat.

"You don't remember?"

"No. I hit my head, I think."

"So, you don't remember who hurt you?"

"No."

Tequila hummed. After that, silence filled the air. Leo waited for a response, an explanation, something. He was a little bit nervous, he wasn't sure what to expect. Did he even want to learn what was going on?

"Well, you are in New York," he started, and Leo's gasp interrupted him. "What? First time in New York?"

"No," he answered firmly. "I live in New York. I've always lived in New York. But this city... this can't be New York. New York isn't a dead city."

"But it is, kid. I don't know which New York you know, but this is not that. Once, it was a great place, full of people, happiness, waves of laughter, families. Of course, there was crime too, but life wasn't bad back then. Not at all."

"Where are the people now?"

"They are brainwashed and serving the devil himself. Who managed to escape, the few of the population, are hiding."

"The devil?"

"Alias Oroku Saki. Or the Shredder," he spat angrily.

"The Shredder?! What? He took over the world or what??" Leo jumped up and demanded with widened eyes.

"Yes, but yo-"

"How? How did this happen?"

"The Kraangs helped him."

"When did this all happen?" he grabbed his head.

"Around thirty years ago."

"Thirty...? What? But..." he began to shook his head. "It can't be.”

Leo jumped up and began to walk in circles in the ‘living room’.

“What’s wrong?” Tequila asked. What has gotten into this kid? he thought wonderingly.

“I have a sneaking suspicion,” he said nervously. “Do you know Karai?”

“Of course. Everybody knows her. She’s the Shredder’s daughter.”

“What? She isn’t!”

“She is.”

Leo's eyes widened in horror. If it was true, then it meant only one thing. The hunch was right, but he couldn’t believe it. He just couldn’t! Was he... was he in another dimension?

Chapter Text

3

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”

- Carl Gustav Jung -

"So... I must be in a different dimension," Leo stated. He was sitting at the table, a hot tea in his hands. After he had become hysterical, Tequila had slapped him twice, hard, then he led him to the table and made him tea as an apology and to calm the kid's nerves down. "This dimension is horrible! I hope the guys will find me soon."

"It's good news that you live in a better place. Kids shouldn't experience such a life," Tequila said, then he sipped from his tea. He was sitting opposite him. "I hope your world won't turn into a nightmare as mine did."

"Yes. I wish we could defeat the Shredder soon. After that, we could live a peaceful life."

So he has a family, Tequila thought. He would like to learn more about the young boy. He didn't even know his name. But he knew he didn't have to know more about him. He didn't want to get too close to him. He had to send him back to his world before he gets used to the fact that he's not alone anymore. And before he doesn't want to let the boy go.

"Do you think it's hopeless to go against the Shredder? Do you think that this world can't be saved?" Leo asked.

"Yes. I lost hope a long time ago. We tried to overcome the Shredder, but we failed. We'd lost too much," the older replied woefully. Leo looked at him sadly, then his eyes drooped. The bigger turtle sighed, then continued. "But let's not talk about the past anymore. It can't be changed. Let's speak about our future. You have nowhere to go, am I right?"

"Yeah..." he whispered.

"You can stay here, on two conditions. You won't go hysterical again, and you will obey me. Understood?"

"Yes, thank you."

Leo drank the last sip from his tea and opened his mouth again. "Can I ask something?"

"Go ahead."

"Are there other turtles here too?"

"Yes."

"How many?"

Tequila thought for a moment. "I'm not sure..." Were they still alive? He didn't know. It was a long time ago when he last saw one of them.

"So, you don't know where they are, right?"

"Yes. I haven't seen any of them for a while."

"Were they your teammates?"

"Yes. And I had teammates from other species too."

"What happened to them?"

Tequila lifted the cup to his mouth. How could he tell it nicely and carefully to a child? He didn't want to scare him. He didn't know how old he was. He sounded young, and he was little, Tequila assumed that he was a young teenager. He put him between thirteen and sixteen.

"One injured, another died, and somebody disappeared. Lots of things happened to them. I wouldn't like to go into details."

"I-I understand."

"Since when are you a mutant?" the older asked suddenly.

"I mutated shortly after I hatched."

"So, you were a pet turtle."

"Yes. What about you?"

"The same can be said about me too."

"And since when..." Leo cut himself off. Should he ask? Wouldn't it be a bit nosy? He didn't want to be indiscreet.

"Since when what?" Tequila urged him.

"Since when are you... blind?" Leo asked quietly and sheepishly.

"It happened almost thirty years ago. I've lost my sight by the Shredder. We'd already lost our doctor, and during that wartime, we couldn't find anybody else who could have helped me."

"I don't know what I would do if that happened to me," Leo sighed.

"Once, Helen Keller said: 'Blindness is an unfortunate handicap, but true vision does not require eyes.' Do you know who she was?"

"An author?"

"Among other things, yes. But most importantly, she was the first deaf-blind person to earn a Bachelor of Arts degree. At first, when I first read about her, I couldn't understand how she could live with such a misfortunate fate. And I still can't understand. I have no idea what I would do if I went deaf too. When I had my sight, I had no idea what I would do if I went blind. And now, I'm here, an old, blind, mutant, who is still alive. I had learned how to live with this hindrance. It wasn't easy, not at all, but I managed to adapt. There are things that cannot be understood by those people who didn't experience them. But no matter what you experience in your life, it is necessary to adapt."

Leonardo was listening to him intently. This turtle reminded him of Master Splinter now.

"You know... you remind me of a wise man I know," Leo said. "He's been telling us wise things since our hatch and sometimes he's speaking in riddles," Leo smiled as he thought about his father, but it soon turned into a frown as he realized that he can't get advice from him right now. And who knows when he will see him again. He blew the air out through his nose.

"As I see it, you have to break in a way to be wise. I guess his life wasn't the best either, was it?"

"You're right. He has lost his first family," Leo released a sigh sadly.

"But he could move on, and now he's happy again with you."

"Yes. He says that when he misses his loved ones from the past, he focuses on the friends he's surrounded in the present."

What a shame that I have nobody to focus on, Tequila thought bitterly.

"Do you live alone?" Leo asked.

"Yes."

"Don't you have family or friends?"

"I had. But I've lost them. They had died, and the rest of us drifted apart."

"Call them up! I'm sure they don't like this either. You can be friends again!" Leo explained confidently.

"You're young, and you're so naive," the older turtle shook his head. "When I was as young as you are now, I also believed that everything and everybody can be saved. You will grow out of it."

"I'm not naive," Leo defended himself, offended. "You are too pessimist."

Tequila hummed, and a smirk appeared on his face. "Perhaps we are both far away from realistic, but in a different way."

"Well, you could at least try."

Tequila folded his hands around the empty cup. Perhaps he really should try... No! They didn't give a damn about him, then why would he? But at least one of them... he was so lonely. He was alive, but he was just surviving this life without his family, not actually living it.

But the idea didn't vanish from his mind.

"I can make you spaghetti for dinner," Tequila offered as he walked out of the lab. Leo was sitting on the couch, watching some kind of cartoon on the TV.

"Can I help?" Leo asked.

"Not needed. I've been managing on my own for quite some time now."

"Alright. I should avoid the kitchen anyway."

"Why?" Tequila stepped to the hotplate and put the red pot filled with water on it.

"I can't cook or bake... or anything else what others do in the kitchen," Leo admitted slightly embarrassed. "I can only make tea without setting the kitchen on fire."

The older turtle chuckled. "I wasn't better either when I was young. But since I live alone, I had to learn these things."

"How old are you?" Leo asked. "If I might ask," he added sheepishly.

"I'm forty-seven. What about you, kid?"

"I'm fifteen, soon sixteen."

"You have your whole life ahead of you," he put the pasta into the boiling water. "Hopefully, you don't have to spend the rest of your time here."

"Yeah... but I don't know how I will go back. Perhaps the only thing I can do is waiting."

Tequila thought for a moment. Should he offer his help? He couldn't let this poor child be stuck here. But it wasn't his problem. He didn't even know this kid. He wasn't his father or something... But still... this child didn't do anything wrong against him. It wouldn't kill him to call someone up. Perhaps with this call, he could get a friend back too. But what if they couldn't help him? What will happen to the kid, then? Should he take care of him in the future?

He took a deep breath.

Let's worry about this later, he thought.

Chapter Text

4

“Know thyself? If I knew myself, I’d run away.”

- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe -

Leonardo was already asleep on the couch. Tequila was sitting on his own bed in the lab, his phone in his hand. It was a long time ago when he last time used it. Should he call them? As he fell deeper in his thoughts, his thumb was stroking the black screen.

He had to help the child. At least he had to try it. He unlocked his phone, then he clicked on the little envelope. Or at least, he hoped he clicked on that. He was afraid that he didn't remember well.

Oh damn, he thought suddenly. This phone could be led by voice. Was he getting senile?

He told a name to the phone, and then he dictated the text for the messages.

'Is Stockman still working for you?'

He knew he wouldn't get a reply immediately. It was midnight. But what if he will never get a reply? They wouldn't ignore his SMS, right? He hoped it.

He got this phone from Stockman years ago. He promised that it can't be tracked down. The others believed him, so did he. Fortunately, nobody found him because of the phone. Yet.

He put the device on the table, voice on, and he lay down. He should rest a little too. Perhaps this time he will be lucky enough to dream with pictures...

Beep-beep.

The little beeping sound woke Tequila up. He groaned as he rose to his feet and grabbed his glasses and the phone.

'I'm sorry for the late reply. I didn't think you would write... by the way, yes, he's still working with me. Why? And what about you? Are you okay? We haven't heard from you in a while...'

A 'yes' would have been enough, he thought. He ignored the lots of questions and asked a new one.

'Can he make a portal to other dimensions?'

The answer came fast: 'Perhaps. But why? You don't want to leave us, do you?'

Leave them? Why did they care? Nobody would notice if he disappeared. He remembered when he actually planned to run away. He didn't know where, just so far away from here. But he didn't do that. He hoped that everything would be okay. He hoped that the others would be there for him.

Hope dies last, people say. But what if the hope died? Then, he shouldn't be alive either.

He sighed bitterly. Perhaps he should go with the child.

He slapped himself mentally. Why would you? he asked himself. Do you want to force that kid to take care of you? Of an old, blind stranger? You would be alone there too, you would have to hide there too...

He brought the phone to his mouth.

'A kid got here from another dimension, and he needs help.'

'Come over with the kid, and then we can discuss it, okay?'

He bit his bottom lip. He didn't want to go.

Knock-knock.

The lab door was slid open a little, and Leo peeked in.

"Good morning," he said shyly.

"Good morning," Tequila replied. Hm, he didn't remember when he said it last time. "Do you need something?"

"Um, no, not really. I just checked whether you were awake."

The older man raised one eye-ridge. He was suspicious.

"Now, you're here, finish your plan and tell me the truth."

"Okay," he said quietly and closed the door behind him. He pursed his lips as he took a few steps towards the taller turtle.

"Well?" Tequila urged him.

"My side is bothering me...a little," Leo looked away. He didn't like to admit that he wasn't completely okay.

"Sit on the cot, I will change your bandage."

Leo did as he was told. Tequila unwrapped Leo from the white dressing and gently touched the wound. Leo hissed.

"Fortunately, you didn't tear your stitches," he put the new one on. "Are you sure you don't need any painkiller? You don't sound good."

"I'm fine."

Tequila pressed the wound through the bandage with his finger hard.

"Ow! Why did you do that?" he clapped a hand over the sore area.

"You are reeeeaaallllyyy fine," he narrowed his eyes.

"Of course, it hurts if you make it!" Leo fought back.

We will get some medicine in the evening, Tequila planned. Will he be okay until evening? Should we go sooner?

"What is the time?" he asked.

"Around six o'clock."

"Then, let's eat something and go for some medicine before the Foot's rush hour."

"When is it?"

"From eight to midnight."

"And what about the last eight hours?"

"They loose up a bit. This is when you can get some food. The Shredder doesn't want the rebels to die. He wants them to assimilate into the Foot."

Leo lowered his head and asked nothing else.

The two turtles slalomed from building to building. Though the Foot let the rebels go out to get some food, they didn't hesitate to strike down any of them. And jumping on the rooftops would have been too conspicuous, especially during daylight.

When they get to an alley, Tequila turned to Leo.

"Wait here."

"Why? I wanna go," Leo whined.

"Do you see that building in front of us?" Tequila felt Leo nodding against his arm. "I will be there. But just for a minute, so you don't have to worry."

"But why can't I go too?"

"Just wait here," Tequila ordered, then he ran to the building. It was light brown and looked like a big warehouse. Was the medicine inside there? But if he went to get the medicine, why didn't he let Leo come with him?

Leo didn't like this. He was alone, weaponless, injured in a strange world. He hoped Tequila wouldn't be away so long.

He was so lost in his thoughts, that he didn't hear that somebody jumped down from the rooftop and was approaching him from behind.

"What the hell?" came a familiar voice.

Leo turned around and saw a tall, middle-aged woman in black clothes and armor. Her black hair reached her shoulders, and her amber eyes were scanning Leo.

"You? No, it can't be... you can't be him," she muttered.

"Karai?" Leo asked surprisedly.

"Yes. But who are you?" she stepped closer and put a hand on her tanto. He's too young to be him, she thought. But he looks exactly like him. Does he have a child? But how? Did he clone himself with Stockman? Did the others clone themselves too? Or did he find a female mutant? Another turtle?

"That's... that's none of your business," Leo stuttered. This Karai isn't my Karai, she serves the Shredder, she's his daughter, he thought.

"So you have chosen the hard way," her gaze hardened and unsheathed her sword. She lunged at him. Leo just barely could avoid the sharp weapon. Oh, how he missed his swords right now! He had no chance against her! Karai attacked him again and again, and Leo jumped away every time. But it was just the beginning, Karai was only playing with him. She didn't want to hurt him if it wasn't necessary. He was just a child, a weaponless, already injured child. But if he won't speak, then she won't have another choice but attack him in a real way.

"Tell me who you are, and I will spare your life."

"I won't tell you anything. Leave me, Karai. I'm not alone," Leo tried to sound confident and dangerous, but he was afraid that Tequila wouldn't be back in time.

"You are not alone?" she asked with a smirk. "Then, where is your savior?"

"He'll be here soon..." Leo said uncertainly. "But you shouldn't attack me! I'm weaponless and injured! Where's your honor?"

"Did your father teach you about honor?" Karai asked, thinking of another turtle.

"Yes, he did. But as I see, your father didn't!"

Karai narrowed her eyes in anger, and Leo gulped nervously. Oops...

Karai swung her tanto towards the turtle's face so fast that Leo couldn't react in time. He closed his eyes quickly and felt as the sword cut him between his left eye and ear-split. His mask fell down to his shoulder, then slid down on his plastron to the ground. Karai was ready to strike again, but as she drew her weapon down, another sword blocked hers.

"Leave him alone!" Tequila spat furiously.

"We were just familiarising with each other," she smirked. "But what about you? Did you get a son or what?"

"What if I did?" he growled as he pushed Karai back.

"By who?"

"That's none of your business."

"You couldn't even deny it," she said, then bent down and grabbed Leo's mask. "Sayonara," and with that, he jumped onto the fire-escape and disappeared.

"Let's go," Tequila gripped Leo's arm.

"But my..."

"Your what?"

"Um, never mind. Did you get the medicine?" Leo changed the topic. He didn't want Tequila to try and replace the mask for him. He had enough problems.

"Not yet."

"Then, what were you doing there?" Leo asked wonderingly.

"I met someone, but it's not important right now. Let's go for medicine."

The older turtle pulled the younger one after him. Leo couldn't help but wonder who he met with.

"Master," Karai bowed in front of his master and father in the throne room. "I met Leonardo."

"Did you finish him?" Shredder asked, sitting on his throne.

"No, but I learned an interesting thing about him. He has a son," he lifted the blue mask in his hand.

The Shredder snapped his gaze to his daughter. "Are you sure about this?"

"Yes, he admitted it to me."

"What if he lied?"

"I do not think so. He looked exactly like him when he was younger. And the way he was acting... everything matched."

"How is this possible?"

"I do not know yet, but I will."

"Excellent. Next time, capture the boy. He can be useful to us."

"I understand, Father."

Chapter Text

5

“The vast majority of adults have never met themselves.”

- Mokokoma Mokhonoana -

Leo was sleeping again. The painkiller did its job. Tequila was sitting next to the couch, in the armchair. It was only five o'clock in the afternoon, but he felt that it was a long day. He met too many people today. He didn't plan this. He wasn't used to it anymore. He sighed and threw his head back. A little rest won't hurt him either. But as soon as he closed his eyes, the memory from the morning started to play in his mind.

Tequila stepped inside carefully. It was years ago when the team worked here together. He walked ahead slowly. Silence filled the area as he was walking. But in the next minute, he heard as a door opened. 

"Leo!" said a cheery feminine voice. The turtle stopped. He felt as the woman ran towards him, and as soon as she reached him, she hugged him. And with that hug, the time froze for a minute as well as Tequila. He didn't know what to do. Hug back? Push her away? Or just stand there like a frozen chicken? Hm, the last one was the most likeable for him. He waited until the woman let go of him. "I'm so glad that you came! How are you?"

"Been better..." he said coldly. "What about you?"

"Well, I'm fine, as much as I can be."

"That's good... um, I'm not planning to stay long. Can you help or not?"

"We can help, but Stockman needs time to build the portal, and he needs information about the child's dimension."

"Alright. I just wanted to make sure before bringing him here,” he explained, slightly nervously. It was long time ago when he talk to her.

"I understand."

"I have to go, he's waiting outside."

"Invite him in, then," she smiled. 

"We don't have time now. He needs some medicine, but nothing serious," he explained.

"I can examine him," she offered.

"Thanks, but I already did. He's going to be okay. But thanks... for everything."

"Oh, don't mention it," she waved.

"Really, April. I appreciate it," he said quietly, then turned around. "We'll come in a few days," and with that, he left the area. 

As he stepped outside, he immediately felt that something was wrong. He heard fighting. As he got closer, he heard talking.

"Did your father teach you this honor stuff?" asked a familiar voice. It belonged to a dangerous woman who was his friend in the past.

"Yes, he did. But as I see, your father didn't!" 

Tequila was surprised to hear such courage from the child, but it made him smirk. It must have piss Karai off.

As he reached them, he felt as she was bringing her sword down at the kid, but before it could hurt him, Tequila blocked it

He opened his eyes, though nothing changed. He reached for his face and took the glasses off. He rubbed his eyes slowly and decided to get a nap in a real bed. He rose to his feet, but as soon as he stood up, an afterimage came in.

"Did you get a son or what?"

"What if I did?

Why did he say that? He shouldn't have. But... it didn't matter. It was better than explaining to the enemy what's up. 

"You couldn't even deny it."

What did she mean? Because the kid was talking about honor? Or because he was a turtle too?

"But my..."

"Your what?"

"Um, nevermind.

And what did the kid want to say? Well... after all, he didn't say anything, so it couldn't be so important... right?

Wait! What if he got injured? He was weaponless, injured, and a CHILD! Against Karai who was an armored, well-experienced adult ninja! Though he knew how to fight when he was a kid, that didn't mean that every kid knows. Especially in that shape what he was in. Perhaps he wanted to tell that something hurts, but he was too afraid to tell. He must have been rude or too cold... He didn't even ask if he was okay! Oh, man. He wasn't good with children. He got so used to being alone, that he didn't even know how to act around others anymore. 

He walked to the cot in the lab. He stepped to the kid and put his hands on his shoulders. He was looking for injuries. He felt his arms and upper plastron over, then he moved his hands to his sides. As he was trying to find out if he was okay, he forgot that he already had an injury, and he pressed the wound on his side accidentally.

"Argh!" Leo snapped awake and brought his hand over his wound while he sat up. 

"I'm sorry," the older turtle said. 

"Why did you do that?" Leo asked in a half-annoyed, half-sleepy voice. 

"It was an accident. I wanted to make sure that you are okay after the fight with Karai."

"You could have asked me."

"I didn't want to wake you up," Tequila rubbed the back of his head. 

"I see, but don't touch me over next time while I'm asleep, okay? That's weird, you know." 

"I didn't want to overstep. I didn't mean-"

"It's okay. I just don't like it when someone's touching me or something while I'm sleeping, even if they are want to help. It's just my whim, sorry." 

"I understand. I won't do it again. But then, tell me if you are injured right away."

"Okay."

"So? Did Karai hurt you?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Umm..." Leo looked away. 

Tequila sighed. He knew. "Show me," he ordered and reached his arm out towards him. 

"It's not big, nothing serious," Leo said, then took his hand and brought it to the small wound on his face. Tequila felt it and hummed.

"You should have told me," he flicked the younger's forehead. Leo rubbed it with his hand, and a whined a bit, so Tequila could understand that he glared at him. Tequila cleaned the wound, then put a plaster on it. 

"Do you want to sleep back or eat something?" 

"Hmm..." Leo thought for a moment, but a second later his stomach grumbled which made the answer for Tequila. 

Chapter Text

6

“All roads taken lead us only to ourselves.”

- Kilroy J. Oldster, Dead Toad Scrolls -

3 weeks later

"Can you help us or not?" Tequila asked a little annoyed. He held his phone to his ear-slit and paced around in the living room. 

"We can, I told you," came the answer.

"You said that it would take a few days. Three weeks passed. Are you sure that you can help? If you can't, then please tell us, and then I will find another solution."

"He just needs some time,"

"How much?"

"I don't know. He's looking for a component."

The turtle released a sigh. "Alright. Then call me when he found it, and then I will take the kid to you to help."

"Okay. And we are sorry, Leo."

"It's okay, April. Bye."

"Bye"

Suddenly, the lab door opened, and Tequila put the phone away as he turned towards the kid. 

"Good morning."

"Good morning," Leo smiled.

"How are you?"

"I'm fine, nothing hurts."

"That's good. Let's have breakfast, then I'll check your wound."

While Tequila was examining the young turtle, Leo was thinking about the past three weeks. They were watching TV, playing Twenty Questions and training. But they weren't speaking so much. Leo wanted to know Tequila better, asked some questions, but the older turtle usually didn't answer. Tequila didn't ask anything. He wasn't curious about the younger. 

"Tequila?" Leo started. 

"Yes?"

"Why do you never ask anything?"

"What do you mean?" Tequila asked, confused. 

"You never ask about my life, my family... you don't even know my name."

"I don't need to know. You are going to leave this place, so there's no reason for us to know each other better or get to used to each other."

"Why?"

"It would just make everything harder."

"Why?" 

"That's the end of this conversation."

"I disagree," Leo stated and looked determined. "My na-"

Tequila put his finger on the boy's lips. 

"I don't want to know." 

Tequila knew that the information wouldn't have hurt him, but he just... didn't want to know this boy. He didn't want to start to like him. He didn't want himself to want him to stay... with him, perhaps as a friend... or as his son. The more he knew about him, the more he wanted this loneliness to end... the more wanted him to become his family... But he also knew that this boy didn't belong to him. He has to go back to his world, to his family. And as soon as it happens, he will be alone again... and forever. 

Leo decided to cook something. Yes, Leonardo Hamato wanted to cook something! It happened before in the past a few times, but then there was always somebody who could stop him. But now, there was nobody! Tequila was training, so Leo was all alone in the kitchen! Leo opened the fridge and looked in.

"Hmm..." he thought for a moment. What can he cook? Um... nothing. Alright, then what can he cook without destroying the kitchen, killing someone, or making the food absolutely inedible. Tough question. He looked through the food in the fridge, and something caught his attention. "Sushi? I thought we had eaten all of them. Hmm, they are so old, we shouldn't eat them." He grabbed them and decided to throw them out. He walked towards the trash when Tequila stepped in.

"What are you doing?"

Leo turned around surprisingly. He didn't expect him to finish his training so soon. 

"Just throwing out the sushi. They are too old."

"No. Put it back. We won't waste food," he said firmly. 

"But..."

"If you don't want to eat it, it's fine, I will eat it."

"Okay..." Leo said defeated and walked back to the fridge. 

"And don't be in the kitchen without me. You said you are dangerous here. I don't want a fire or anything."

Leo looked annoyed. "Fine..." 

A scream rang through the hideout, which woke Tequila up immediately. He ran out of the lab, towards the living room, since Leo was using the couch as his bed now. 

"What's wrong? What happened?" Tequila demanded as he reached the couch. The answer was a relieved sob. The older turtle understood and sat next to the weeping turtle. He put an arm around the shaking boy and started to rub his arm. "It's okay, kid. It was just a dream."

Leo hugged Tequila tightly which surprised the turtle. A hug... he almost forgot how it feels. Tequila hugged back the younger turtle and rubbed his head. 

"Do you want to talk about it?" 

Leo didn't reply, he just cried into Tequila's plastron. He thought the boy wouldn't tell him, but after a few minutes, he started.

"It was so real..." he sobbed. "Shredder to-took over the world wi-with the Kraangs a-a-and made the people their s-slaves. And then...the Sh-shredder killed my... f-family and friends. I ran away. I ran to y-your hideout, b-b-but you-you were de-dead too!" Leo cried harder at the memory. "I was a-alone. All alone. And the Sh-shredder was a-after me-e. I was s-so afraid..." 

Tequila couldn't help but hug the turtle even tighter. He had similar nightmares too, but he had no one to comfort him. And it just made the situation worse. He didn't want the boy to feel what he felt. He whispered comforting words into his ear-slit and stroked soothing circles on his shell. 

He stayed with the kid until Leo dozed off. Tequila didn't dare to move, so he remained in that hugging position until he also fell asleep.

Tequila was already awake when Leo woke up too. When the younger turtle realized their positions, he sat up immediately and apologized. 

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"You couldn't sleep because of me," Leo stated sadly. 

"That's not true. I could sleep. I woke up just a few minutes earlier than you."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Tequila..." Leo continued sheepishly.

"Hm?"

"Thank you..."

"It was nothing," he waved. "Are you okay now?"

"Yes."

"Then okay."

After that, none of them said a word, but they didn't move either. They just sat on the big couch, next to each other, in silence. 

But just for a minute. 

"Tequila?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think your friends can help me?"

The question caught the older turtle off guard. He didn't expect it. 

"Of course," he said, though he wasn't so sure about it. 

"Honestly?" 

"Yes. They are really smart. They just need some time, but I'm sure that they are going to find a solution."

"And what if you're wrong? What if they can't help and I stick here?"

"Don't think about it. You will get home." 

"I don't know. I start to lose my hope."

"Already? Only three weeks passed."

"These three weeks were like three years to me. I really miss my family, you know. I'm afraid I can't see them again."

Tequila didn't know what to say. 

"But... if it happens... and I have to stay here... then you won't throw me out, right? I can stay here with you, right?"

"If it happens, which I'm sure won't, then you will stay here with me. It can't be a question. And then, you can tell me everything about yourself... and I will tell you everything about myself. We can be... friends... or like father and son if you want to."

"Thanks. You know, it's reassuring that I'm not alone here and I won't have to be. I'm glad that I have you here."

The older turtle's eyes watered at Leo's words and pulled the boy closer to himself.

I wish you would stay here.

Chapter Text

7

“The more you know yourself, the more clarity there is. Self-knowledge has no end – you don’t come to an achievement, you don’t come to a conclusion. It is an endless river.”

- Jiddu Krishnamurti -

A week later

The two turtles spoke more during this week, though they didn't talk about their pasts. Leo still didn't understand the reason, but he didn't bring it up again. 

Leo was lying on the couch, in the dark, thinking about his family. Will he ever see them again? Can Tequila's friends help him? A month passed, and still nothing. Should he just give up?

No!

He can't give up. No, no, never. He won't lose his hope. He has to keep it. But with every day, it became harder and harder. 

Leo woke up to gagging. He rubbed his eyes as he got off the couch. As soon as he collected some energy, he started to follow the strange sound. He walked towards the lab, then he turned to left, where the bathroom door was open. Leo went to the bathroom and switched the light on. The light let Leo see what was happening. He saw Tequila vomiting into the toilet. Leo cowered next to him and looked at him worriedly.

"What's wrong?" 

"I'm fine," he breathed. "Go back to sleep."

"You don't look fine to me."

"It's just a little indigestion."

"Was it the sushi?"

As a reply, Tequila threw up into the toilet again.

"I knew it," Leo frowned. "I told you it was too old."

"You were right, be happy then," Tequila answered edgily. 

"I'm not happy," Leo said a little bit hurt. "How can I help you?"

"Nohow."

Leo stood up and went back to the lab. He walked to the cabinet and opened it. He was looking for some medicine.

"Nothing useful," He whispered. He walked back to the puking turtle and said. "I found nothing in the cabinet. Do you have medicine somewhere else?"

"No," he gasped. 

"Then, I will go up."

"Forget it," Tequila managed to say. "No need to... to risk your life... for an upset stomach."

"It's not that late. We have time before the Foot's rush hour. I can do it."

"No."

"Yes, I'm going out. Sorry for disobeying you, but I won't just sit around and watch your suffering."

"Listen, kid..." he breathed heavily. He was exhausted. "It's not the first time. I'm going to be okay. So... just go back to sleep."

"I'm going out," Leo said firmly. "Can I get a weapon?"

"No, you stay home!"

"Then I'm going without a weapon," Leo was determined. There was no way to order him around when he decided to help someone. And Tequila could see it too. 

"You won't... you won't listen to me...right?"

"I'm sorry, but yes."

"I'm... coming too."

"No. You're sick, you stay here. But then, can I take your swords?"

Tequila nodded slowly. 

"Take care of-," and he threw up.

"Don't worry. I will take care of them."

Of yourself... Tequila thought.

Leo was running between the building towards the place, where they got medicine last time. After some minutes, he noticed the small warehouse. He looked around, then he stepped out of the alley and sprinted towards it. But he didn't reach it.

2 weeks earlier

"You've become better during the years," Karai said as he avoided her enemy's attack. 

"Yer not bad either," said a deep voice. "But I saw better."

Karai swung her blade but a sai blocked it.

"I met somebody," she started.

"Who cares?"

"Your brother."

"I don't have brothers."

"Leonardo."

"I don't know any Leonardo,"

"Oh, Raphael, you are so childish," Karai said, as she lunged at him.

Raphael dodged it again. "Why are ya telling me this?"

"I just want to know something."

"I don't know anything about him."

Karai smirked as she thought about Raphael's future reaction. 

"Do you know that you are an uncle?"

The turtle suddenly froze.

"A... a what?"

"An uncle. You have a nephew, Raphael."

"Impossible."

"Is it? I saw him with my own eyes. A little Leonardo."

"We can't have children," he stated.

"Well, he managed somehow. That boy is his. He even admitted to me."

"Leonardo?"

"Yes. He had to protect him from me. Poor child, he was a little off that day."

"Yer lying! That's absurd!" Raphael still didn't want to believe it.

"You think? Then go and see him yourself."

Now

Raphael was standing on a rooftop, waiting for some trouble. He still didn't believe Karai. 

"Yeah, Leo surely made a child...tsk, my ass. That was lame from Karai," he said to the air. 

He turned his head left and noticed a black figure on another roof. Raphael was watching it carefully, and saw a gun. He followed where the gun was pointing and saw somebody crossing the road. 

"Heh?" Raphael managed to say, as he recognized that somebody's species. "A turtle? Moreover, a kid turtle? Can he...no, I'm sure it's not him," He looked back at the figure and sighed. "Gotta help, I guess..."

He jumped down with the help of the fire escape and ran towards the kid. 

As the gun went off, Raphael grabbed the kid's arm and pulled him to the alley. 

"Ya okay?" he asked, not turning around. 

A reply was a faint moan and a thud. Raphael turned around and saw the kid on his knees, his right hand was pressed against his left upper arm.

"It hit ya?!" he cowered in front of the kid and gently took his injured arm. The boy let him look at his wound. "Don't worry, kiddo, it just grazed ya."

The kid looked up, straight to his savior's face, and his eyes widened as he recognized the familiar mask.

"R-Raph?"

Raph looked at him surprised. "Ya know me?"

"You..." Leo felt that something wasn't right with himself. "You're my... my..." before he could finish, his eyes rolled back and went limb in Raphael's arms.

 When Leo opened his eyes, he found himself in a foreign place. Suddenly, he panicked and wanted to sit up, but two strong hands pushed him back. 

"Stay still. Don't worry, yer in a safe place. Ya fainted probably from the shock."

Leo turned his head towards the voice and noticed Raphael. And he saw his eye...

"Raph? Your...your..."

"Yeah. I can't believe that Karai was right!" 

"What do you mean?" 

"That I'm an uncle. It's so unbelievable, that I have a nephew. Man, ya really look like yer father. Not exactly, but I see him in ya. At least, his old self. He looks totally different nowadays. I don't really see him nowadays, though. If I came from the past, I wouldn't recognize him. But I wouldn't recognize myself or the others either without the mask and stuff. We look really scary, ain't we?"

"Umm..." Leo didn't know how to reply. He didn't really understand what Raphael was talking about. Uncle? And nephew? Who?

"Okay, don't answer."

"What did you mean by nephew?"

"What do ya mean? I meant that yer my nephew. This is what ya wanted to say, right? That I'm your uncle."

"Umm..." 

"I can't believe that he managed to make a child! And he didn't tell us! Okay, we aren't best friends now, but still! I have the right to know if I have a nephew!"

What the hell is going on? 

"Did you get a son or what?"

"What if I did?"

Yeah, he remembered that. Was this the reason why Raphael was talking nonsense to him? Did Karai tell him? But wait... if Raphael thinks that Leo is his nephew, then that means that he's... Tequila's brother. And if this Raphael is his Raph's counterpart, then Tequila is... Donnie or Mikey... or himself. No, he can't be his counterpart. He would have recognized himself, wouldn't he?

"If I came from the past, I wouldn't recognize him."

Can it be that he changed this much? He always thought that Tequila was somehow familiar to him. But he didn't know why. 

Perhaps in this dimension, Raphael has a fourth brother, or his brothers are totally different from him... Tequila can't be him, nor Donnie or Mikey. Tequila was so... not them. Too dark. Too sad. The thought scared him. 

"So..." Leo cleared his throat. "So... Karai told you, right?"

"Yes. And of course, I didn't believe her."

"No wonder," he said under his breath. 

"What's yer name?" Raphael asked. 

"Leo."

"Hah, can't believe he named you after himself!" Raphael huffed.

A-after himself?? Then that means that Tequila is...him?

Chapter Text

As a preliminary point: Raphael and Tequila are really not best friends. Not at all.

8

“If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it is because self-knowledge is painful and we prefer the pleasures of illusion.”  

- Aldous Huxley -

"So, who's yer mother?"

"Umm... I don't have a mother."

"Then, how were ya born?" 

"Umm... that's... complicated," Leo looked away. 

"Okay, I get it. Ya don't wanna talk about it."

"Can I... ask something?" Leo asked shyly. 

"Sure."

"What happened to your eye?"

"Oh, this," he rubbed his head. "Didn't yer dear father tell ya?"

"He doesn't like to talk about his past."

Raphael huffed annoyed. "Coward."

"What?!" Leo asked back surprisingly. 

"Sorry for saying that, but yer dad is an asshole."

"He's not," Leo narrowed his eyes. He wasn't an asshole. Right? He would never be...

"He is. Sorry for disappointing ya, but he's sooo far away from what he told and show ya about himself. 'Cause I'm sure, he didn't show ya what a jerk he really is."

"Why do you say that?" Leo's eyes watered. If Tequila was really his counterpart, then Raphael was defiling HIM, Leonardo. It hurt him, even if it wasn't directed exactly to him.

"It's not my job to tell ya. Yer father has to tell ya. I just hope ya didn't inherit this shit of him. And I hope he won't ruin ya, and won't instill his cowardice and spinelessness in ya."

Leo couldn't help but let a tear escape as he realized Raphael how much hated him. Was he that horrible? 

Raphael noticed this and felt guilty. He didn't want to hurt the kid.

"Eh, look, kiddo, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have talked shit about yer dad to ya, no matter what I think," he took a deep breath. "Okay, let's forget this. Let's talk about ya. How old are ya?"

"Fifteen," he sniffed. 

"How come I never saw you before? Where do you live?"

"I can't tell it."

"Aha, so yer mad at me now. Okay, get it."

Leo decided to sit up, and he was trying to move his tired body.

"Stay."

"No.

"Oh c'mon."

Raph saw that he can't stop this stubborn child, so he put a supporting hand on his shell and helped him to sit up. 

"Did yer father teach you ninjutsu?" Raphael asked calmly.

"Yes."

"What's yer weapon?"

"Katana."

"Ah, I should have known. Sword boy, just like yer dad," a little smile appeared on the old turtle's face as he thought about the old, nice days. But this smile disappeared soon as he reminded himself of the present. "Are those yours?" he pointed towards the swords, that lay nearby.

"No. I lost mine."

"How?"

"Complicated... um... I should head home."

"Yeah, don't make yer dad worry. But I don't think he has this kind of feeling or any other feeling, though."

Leo said nothing, just slowly tried to get off the cot. Raphael grabbed his shoulder to steady him. 

"Ya can't go home alone. So ya have to tell me where ya live."

"I'm totally fine by myself," Leo said firmly.

"Suuuure, this is why there's a bandage on yer arm. And I noticed yer side injury too. And I heard that ya were off against Karai."

Leo looked annoyed. 

"I don't even understand, how could yer dad let you out alone. Some father he is."

"He couldn't come with me."

"Why not?"

"Just let's go..."

"Alright, alright."

Raphael and Leo were near Tequila's hideout. Leo didn't want to show it to Raphael. Tequila was sick, he didn't have medicine, so he didn't want to bring a hostile brother on his back... 

Suddenly, Leo stopped. Raphael looked at him puzzled.

"You can go home now, thanks."

"No way, I wanna see ya go through the door."

"I'll be fine. Just go."

"Why don't ya want me to see where you live?" Raphael raised an eye ridge.

"Just because," Leo answered nervously. As a reply, Raphael narrowed his eyes. 

"Let him go!" suddenly a figure pushed Raphael away.

"What the...?" Raph staggered backward, as he looked at the newcomer. "Leonardo?"

Tequila didn't listen to Raphael, he cowered in front of the kid.

"Are you okay?" he asked worriedly and put his hands on Leo's upper arms. Leo hissed, as Tequila touched his injured arm. "What's wrong? What is this? Bandage? What happened? Is it serious?"

"I'm fine, it just a scratch," Leo tried to calm the older turtle down. It was strange to see him like this.

"But what happened? Did he hurt you?" he meant Raphael.

"What? Ya accuse me of hurting children?!" Raph raised his voice.

"I wouldn't put it past you!"

"Ya little-"

"No!" Leo interrupted them. "He didn't hurt me. To the contrary. He saved me. A Foot shot at me, the bullet just grazed me because Raph pulled me away. And he took care of my injury."

"Are you feeling okay? Aren't you feeling dizzy? Is it hurt?" Tequila turned his attention back to Leo.

"I'm fine."

And then, suddenly, Tequila wrapped his arms around the kid and started to rub his head.

"I was worried! This is why I didn't want you to go. You could have died!"

Raphael couldn't believe his eye and ears. It was a long time ago when he last saw Leonardo this emotional.

"But I didn't," Leo said calmly, though he was a little nervous. Did Tequila just hug him? Okay, he did it before, when he had a nightmare, but this was a little different. He didn’t saw him worried and this caring before. Plus, he knew who he really was. But he still looked at him like he would be a totally different person. Slowly, he returned the hug. "I had worse."

"That's not reassuring, just upsetting."

"I'm alive, that's what matters, isn't that?"

"Yes, you're right," Tequila squeezed him tightly, then he released him. He put his hands on the kid's face and stroked it with his thumbs. 

"Are you okay?" Leo asked as he remembered why he left the hideout.

"Yes, I'm better now. I told you I would be," he smiled. 

"I couldn't get you medicine," Leo lowered his head sadly.

Medicine? Is Leonardo sick? Raph thought with a slight worry. But it soon disappeared. Who cares?

"It doesn't matter. I will be fine anyway."

But still... should he offer his medicine? No, he shouldn't. Why should he? Leonardo didn't give a damn about him, then why would he? 

But what if he really needs medicine... what if this kid will be an orphan because they couldn't get medicine.

Bullshit. I'm sure it's nothing serious. 

But what if...

No!

Raph shook his head as he tried to clear his mind. He clenched his fists, as his soul was trying to talk him around. No, he won't let his inner voice to take over him!

Think about the child. He needs his father. Even if he's the biggest asshole in the world.

"Argggh," Raph grunted, and the other two turtles looked at him. Raph looked at them too and saw a little family in them. He can't separate them because of his feelings. Yeah, he made his decision. "Ya... ya need medicine, huh? I can give ya..."

"Really?" Leo's eyes brightened. 

"We don't need it," Tequila said coldly.

"Huh?" Leo turned his head towards him. "You need it!"

"No, I don't. I am perfectly fine without his medicine."

"Fine!" Raph was furious. He offered his medicine, and he refused it? Fine! He didn't care anymore! "Then don't accept it, don't care!" and with that, Raph turned around and started home.

"But..." 

"Let him go. We don't need him."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because that's the truth," Tequila stood up, took Leo's hand, and headed home, pulling the child after him. 

As they got back, Tequila took back his swords.

"No more solo mission from now on."

"Why were you so rude with Raph? He just wanted to help."

"I don't need his help," he growled.

"Why are you two like this? You are supposed to be brothers!"

"He's not my brother."

"Would you tell me why? Raph said you have to tell me."

"Why me?"

"Umm... Karai told him about our last fight... and now, he thinks that I'm your son..."

"Huh... interesting," Tequila crossed his arms. "What was his reaction?"

"Well, he was mad that you didn't tell him, but he was happy that he's an uncle."

"I'm surprised he didn't see a new enemy in you," he huffed. 

"But he sees one in you."

"The feeling is mutual."

"But why? He said pretty bad things about you. I want to know how much of it is true."

"Ooo, so I am the bad guy, and he is the poor victim brother, isn't he? I'm sure he didn't tell you what kind of person he is. He's always blaming everyone else, but especially me for all his and others' problems. If a meteorite came towards the Earth, it would be my fault too!"

"You both are adult men, and you really fight like children?" Leo raised an eye ridge. 

"It's not a child fight. You don't know how hard he made my life," Tequila raised his voice.

"Yeah, I don't know because nobody wants to tell me!" Leo raised his voice too.

"Let's finish this, alright?" Tequila said calmer. "I want to rest. I'm going to sleep a bit."

"Fine," Leo replied, though he knew he would get his answers, no matter what.

A few hours later, Leo was sitting at the table, his folded hands lay on the desk. Leo didn't know how to continue. He needed answers from Tequila, but it wasn't an easy task. However, he's not that kind of boy who gives up. He didn't want to be like Tequila. He needed answers to prevent this catastrophe. He couldn't imagine that he could drift apart from his brothers this much. What could cause such hatred between them? Was it something that had to happen? Was it unstoppable? Could they prevent it if they knew about it? Or they had no chance against it? Is it something that Fate won't miss out? Will it happen with them too? Is this little trip just an inspection of the future? Is it another dimension for sure? Or Tequila is him just later? No, no. He knew that it wasn't his future. It was another dimension, and Tequila was just his counterpart. But what if his future will be like this? He didn't want this. Not at all. He couldn't let this happen, no matter what.

Suddenly, he heard steps. The lab doors slid open, and Tequila came out.

"How are you feeling?" Leo asked.

"Much better. I told you I would be fine without medicine as well."

"Yes, it looks like you're really starting to get used to being sick. That's sad. You should care more about what you eat."

"In my situation, I am lucky, if I can eat."

"You know, if you wouldn't live alone, it could be better."

"I'm not living alone. You're here," Tequila said, though he knew what Leo meant.

"You know what I mean."

"I know. However, we should leave this topic behind."

"So, you're not gonna tell me what happened, right?"

"Right. I do not wish to share this with you."

"Why not?"

"Because you're going to leave soon, you don't need to know my past. We already discussed that."

"But I would like to know," Leo insisted.

"But I wouldn't like to tell you. Understand it, please," the older turtle started to rub his temples. "You're giving me a headache."

"Then, give me a normal reason, not that that I'm leaving soon."

"Alright, you want a better reason? Fine," Tequila said slightly annoyed, while he was walking towards the table. "My past is private, so you have no right to force me to tell you. You are not my son, despite what others think. You live here temporarily, we don't know anything about each other, and I want it to stay like this. I repeat that's private, so it's none of your business," he slapped his hands on the desk and looked where he thought Leo was. "Understood?"

Leo flinched a little as Tequila hit the table, and he almost said yes. As the older turtle looked at him, accidentally their eyes met, though Tequila couldn't know it. As Leo looked into Tequila's eyes, an endless river of sorrow overflowed him. He didn't want his relationships to ruin with his brothers and friends. He didn't want the Shredder to take over the world. He didn't want Karai to betray him. He didn't want the world to be like this. But most importantly, he didn't want to be like him.

"In fact, it certainly is my business," Leo said slowly.

"What do you mean?" Tequila asked confused.

"…There's something you should know."

Chapter Text

9

“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside; awakes.”

- Carl Jung -

"...it's none of your business. Understood?"

"In fact, it certainly is my business."

"What do you mean?"

"There's something you should know."

"Come on, let's hear," Tequila urged the kid since he went so silent. Leo looked up, then away. He wasn't so sure anymore. Perhaps he shouldn't tell him. What would he gain with this? How would Tequila react? Maybe he wouldn't even believe him. And he wouldn't blame him for this.

"You said there's something I should know. Then, why aren't you telling me now?"

"Umm... I was speaking without thinking, hehe, there's nothing to tell," Leo rubbed the back of his head and smiled sheepishly.

Tequila narrowed his eyes behind the glasses.

"I hate secrets," the older one growled. Leo gulped nervously as he hit himself mentally for being this hasty.

"That's a little funny, coming from you..." little Leo added quietly. In another situation, he would have stay silent, but now he was willing to do anything to change the subject. "I hate secrets too."

Tequila snorted as an answer. He knew very well what the kid meant. He also knew that he wasn't going to tell the kid about his past, even if there's no other way to make the child talk. He crossed his arms and closed his eyes. It's better to finish this conversation now, he thought.

Leo was looking side to side while he was playing with his fingers. How was he going to tell Tequila who he really is? He was really afraid of his reaction. But the main reason, he decided to keep this information to himself is that he still hoped that it was not true. He hoped that he misunderstood something and Tequila isn't him in an older version. He felt like it was just a theory, but as soon as he would say it aloud, it would become real. And he didn't want that. Not at all. It was indescribable how scared he was. He didn't want to become like him. Nor his world and family. This was his biggest nightmare and right now he was just living it!

Suddenly, his eyes filled with tears, as he thought about his family. Oh, how much he missed them! He wanted to go home, hug them and tell them how much he loved them. But he couldn't. He was stuck in that horrible world. He felt as a single tear escaped. He just wanted to go home. Really much.

"Never mind," Tequila broke the silence. "I'm going to train," and with that, he stood up and left the room.

Raphael was smoking a cigarette on the top of a tall building. He was waiting for someone. He knew it very well that this was his area. And he also knew that he didn't want to see him, especially not in his area. But he had to talk to him, and here, he could surely catch him.

And as he expected, he showed up.

It didn't take long for the other person to notice Raphael, and as he did, he narrowed his eyes and growled.

"What are you doing here, Raphael?" he asked coldly.

"I have news," Raph replied, as he threw his cigarette to the ground, then he trampled on it.

"Since when are we talking about news with each other? You have nothing that I would care about."

"And what about a new family member? You wouldn't care about them either? Aren't you even curious?"

"What? What are you talking about?”

"Oh, Mikey, Mikey. You have no idea how big this news is," Raphael stepped closer to Michelangelo. For a minute, he looked at his brother's stump. Even after all those years, he couldn't get used to the sight.

"Spit it quickly! I don't have time for you!" he said angrily.

"You are an uncle," Raphael said simply like it would be the most natural thing in their life.

"Huh?"

"Uncle... y'know, when your sibling gets a child..."

"I know what uncle means!" Michelangelo raised his voice.

"A little, cute boy. Your nephew. Poor guy, he would be really scared of you," he smiled at him tauntingly.

"Were you so lonely that you kidnapped a kid for yourself?"

Raphael snorted.

"He's Leonardo's child," hearing Mikey's gasp, he continued. "And not a kidnapped one. 100% bio."

"Are you trying to prank me?" the younger asked doubtingly.

"Nono. This is the honest truth. And I'm only telling you this because if you would see someone who looks similar to Leonardo, do not kill him. He's just an innocent child."

"Wait, wait, wait," he lifted his hand. "...you telling me that Leonardo is a father? That he got a child on his own?"

"Yes."

"How?"

"I don't know. I guess it's a touchy topic. Little Leo didn't really want to talk about this with me."

"So, you met him?"

"I didn't just meet him. I saved his life! And Leonardo couldn't even say a thank you..." he shook his head. "...ah, never mind, I told what I came for. Now I'm leaving."

"So, you met Leonardo too... I can't even remember when I saw him last time," he looked away with a sour face.

"Well yeah... we don't hang out either."

"Is he still a jerk?"

"No more than you."

Michelangelo didn't respond.

"But yeah, he is a jerk with me, but not with the kid. He was switching between two different personalities as he talked to us. Yes, he's an asshole, but... I guess he loves that child..."

Mikey hummed. So, there's a child in this so-called family.

"Tell me about him," he said suddenly.

"Hah, I thought you didn't care..."

"Raphael..."

"Alright...hmm... he's little and has big blue eyes. He's fifteen. Hmmm, what else... ah, he's a bit sensitive. So, if you meet him, don't talk shit about Leonardo. I speak from experience. Oh, and his name is Leo."

"Leo? Seriously? Leonardo knows how to name a child..."

"Well...after all the kid is like a little Leonardo from the old times...maybe in a softer and cuter version."

Michelangelo snorted as a reply.

"Fine, whatever," he waved. "Now that you told me this, leave. And don't come back."

"How rude...kicking out your own brother..." Raphael smirked.

"I thought we were not brothers anymore... not since... you know..."

Raphael's face turned grim. He remembered. All of this started with Splinter's death. He wondered how they would be if their father was still alive.

"Just leave, Raphael. It will be the best for both of us..." the younger turtle added in a quieter voice.

"Alright," Raph nodded, then he stuck his hand in the pockets of his jacket. He turned around, and without saying goodbye, he jumped to the fire escape and quickly disappeared from Michelangelo's view.

"So, Leonardo has a son... this fact could be even useful for me..."

Chapter Text

10

"I have the true feeling of myself only when I am unbearably unhappy."

- Franz Kafka -

"So, Leonardo has a son... this fact could be even useful for me..."

Karai was jumping roof to roof. As soon as she's read the message that his secret ally left for her, she sneaked out of the Foot Headquarter. Finally, she can show up something to her father.

Suddenly, her eyes caught who she was looking for. The man also noticed her and waited on that certain roof. As Karai jumped in front of him, she immediately asked:

"So?"

Michelangelo looked at the woman in the eyes, who was waiting for his answer.

"I hope you remember what you promised to me," he spoke.

"I do. Do you?" Karai asked, reminding the turtle that what she had promised wasn't for free.

"Yes, I do. And I'm ready to make this deal. I can give you the key of victory."

"What would that key be?" she asked curiously.

"Leonardo's son," he responded emotionlessly.

"So, you know about him..."

He nodded. "It looks like you also know about him. I can help you seize him. With him being your hostage, you will be able to catch Leonardo, and perhaps you could get Raphael too."

"Hmm..." it made her think. This offer certainly caught her attention. But what was the guarantee that this turtle wasn't just trying to fool her? What would he gain with that? Not like he made peace with his brothers all of a sudden. Also, she had what Michelangelo wanted, moreover needed so bad. After all, he had no reason to fool her, right? But would he really be able to take the kid away from his father and give him to the enemy who will who knows what do to him? But she couldn't refuse either. She had been looking for the boy for too long by now, and her father was growing impatient. She had to make this deal. She will make sure that everything will go as she wants.

"Alright. How will you catch him?"

"Just leave that to me, Karai. I will solve it," he didn't give a straight answer since he didn't know it either, how he will do it.

"Then, when will you bring him to me?"

"Within three days," he said coldly.

"Don't be late," as soon as, the words touched Michelangelo's auditory duct, she was already gone.

"I won't," he whispered, then he turned around to go home and plan out the kidnapping.

Leo was eating a tinned soup. Tequila was sitting across him, with crossed arms and legs, listening to the kid's slurping, which told him that he was eating greedily.

"Slow down, kid, it won't run away," he told him gently.

Leo stopped for a minute and looked up at the older man.

"I'm hungry," he simply answered.

"You're acting like you had been starving until now."

"Well... I feel like it. I miss pizza."

Tequila snorted at the mention of pizza. Ohh, he didn't even remember when the last time was, he ate pizza.

"There's no pizza here."

"I noticed. It just makes this world even horrible."

The older turtle chuckled. He missed pizza too. And a lot of other stuff too.

"Which one is your favorite?"

The question surprised the younger one since Tequila didn't like personal questions. But Leo didn't mind it. Moreover, he wanted to use Tequila's initiative for his own advantage.

"Ham pizza. Yours?"

"Pepperoni pizza."

"Ooo. And what's your favorite color?"

"I don't have any."

"Hoow? Mine is blue."

"I'm an adult man, furthermore blind. I don't muse on things like that. Every color is good, I guess."

"But you weren't always blind, were you? Don't you remember how colors look like?"

"I remember. Not fully, but I still have an idea how they may look like."

"Didn't you have a favorite as a child then?"

The man sighed. It looked like he couldn't escape.

"...I liked blue."

"Oh, good. Best color," Leo grinned.

"You're so childish..."

"I'm a child. What did you expect?"

Tequila smiled at his reply.

"How did you go blind?" Leo changed the subject slowly and carefully. He hoped Tequila wouldn't ditch his question.

The child noticed that the other turtle became tense. It was a touchy topic. He knew it very well that the older one didn't want to talk about it, but he needed to know! And perhaps, this time, he will finally answer it. He knew that it was the Shredder who took his sight, but he wanted to know what happened exactly 30 years ago. And not just to him, but to the whole family.

"Well... I was focusing on the Foot soldiers too much, and I didn't notice that he sneaked up on me... When I turned around, he struck down..." he said quietly. "For seconds, I didn't even know what happened to me. Everything became dark, and probably from the shock, the world went silent too. I had no idea what was going. Every noise grew muffled. I knew that my brothers were yelling things to me, but I couldn't catch a word. I covered my eyes with my hands, and I felt as the blood was flowing down between my fingers,” he cleared his throat to hide the shaking. “I felt dizzy and nauseous. I was about to faint when one of my brothers grabbed me and dragged me somewhere in the sewers. And then, he left me there. I was sitting there in my blood, all alone, and I couldn't tell if my family abandoned me or put me to safety. I didn't know what was with them if they were alive or not. I didn't know anything, and it frustrated me. I had no time and energy to realize what really happened to me. My brain truly didn't comprehend that I just went blind..."

He stopped. He lifted his right hand to his eyes and rubbed the tears of sorrow out of them, then gently covered them, as he remembered that life-changing night.

He released a shaking sigh as he grabbed the armrests. Slowly, he rose to his feet, and as he straightened up, he spoke:

"This will be enough for today..." and with that, he returned to his room. "More than enough..." he whispered to himself.

Leo looked after him with a strange break in his eyes. He hugged himself, as he processed what the man told him. He felt so sorry for him. How can someone feel towards someone in two different ways at the same time? He knew who Tequila was. Still, this feeling wasn't self-pity, or was it? Who did he feel sorry for in real? For Tequila or for himself? Or both? Why was it still like that the old turtle was someone entirely different? Did his denial, his fear cause this, or was he really somehow distinct?

He hugged himself as a sudden shiver of apprehension ran through his body. This foreboding immediately knocked the previous train of thought out of his mind. He just hoped that his presentiment was lying to him, even though he knew his feeling of misgiving never failed him before.

Chapter Text

Hi everyone!

I don't know how many of you are still interested in this story, but if you are then I have good news! I'm going to continue this fanfic. Within a few days, I'm going to upload the new chapter. I'm sorry for disappearing for a year (twice), university and my own mental health really got the better of me. Currently, I'm trying to return to my old hobbies, including writing. I have a lot of projects on my own and some hidden fanfics (I may share them in the future), but from now on I will focus on this story (too). I hope some of you are still interested and will follow how the story will progress.

Thanks to everyone who ever read or/and left a comment on this story. It meant/means a lot to me ^^

- I may delete this quick, rash text later, I just wanted to notify you :) -

Chapter Text

11

"Self-knowledge is not the knowledge of a dead self, self-knowledge is the knowledge of the process of the self. It is an alive phenomenon. The self is not a thing, it is an event, it is a process. Never think in terms of things, the self is not there inside you just like a thing waiting in your room. The self is a process: changing, moving, arriving at new altitudes, moving into new planes, going deeper into new depths. Each moment much work is going on and the only way to encounter this self is to encounter it in relationship."

- Rajneesh -

Tequila was sitting on the couch next to the kid, whose eyes were glued to the blank tv screen. He could feel that the child was distressed and tense.

"Is something wrong?" the older male asked.

"...no," Leo muttered.

"Did I say too much? I didn't want to scare you..." Tequila said feeling guilty. This was one of the reasons, he didn't want to talk about his past - he was afraid it would scare or traumatize the child.

"No, it's okay, I'm fine. I appreciate that you told me," Leo sighed. "I know it must have been hard for you, so... thank you."

Tequila slowly reached out toward the kid until his finger touched his shoulder. From there, he led his hand towards the back of his hand. As soon as his palm touched its target, he started to rub the kid's head gently.

Leo was surprised by this kind act, but he didn't mind it, he actually liked it.

They sat there for a while, in comfortable silence, until Tequila's phone started ringing. The old turtle quickly got up and walked towards his device. He closed the lab door behind himself, then he answered the call.

"Hi, Leo!" a cheerful feminine voice greeted him.

"Hello, April. How are things going?"

"I have good news! I know you were doubting Baxter's skills, but he managed to build a portal"

"Wh- really?" Tequila was taken aback. He was almost certain that the portal will never be built. Sudden mixed feelings filled his heart. That's indeed good news. The kid can go home! That's great! But... it also meant that he would be alone again... It wasn't even 2 months since he met that kiddo, and still, he got so attached. This is what he wanted to avoid at any cost. Even though he hardly knew anything about the young boy, they still bonded in a way. For such a lonely man, this short interaction with such a kind and innocent soul was enough to remind him of the old pain of an empty life. His hideout became a home, and his frozen heart dissolved. He'd spent so much time building up his wall to protect his own mind from the cold reality and prevent it from collapsing, and now it was destroyed by a little boy who knew nothing about his inner war. Such a small creature caused such big damage to his shield like a massive bomb, and now he had no idea how to repair it. Could he even rebuild this? His mind was naked and vulnerable again, just like when he had first moved to the hideout.

"...Leo?"

"Oh, April, I'm sorry... - he cleared his throat. "This is indeed great news. Thank you."

"Of course! So, when will you come over? Baxter still needs information about the kid's world so he can set up the location."

"Well, I will talk to him first, then I will call you back."

"Alright!" Tequila ended the call as he walked back to the living room.

"So, today is a good day for you" he stated as he sat down on the couch next to the kid.

"How so?" Leo asked puzzled.

"My friends managed to build a portal-"

"What! Really?" he jumped up excitedly.

"Yes. However, they need information, so we should go over there. You tell when."

"Now! Let's go now!"

"Right now?" Tequila asked back quietly. "We don't have to rush..."

"But I want to! Finally, I can go back to my family! I am so happy!" The older man could hear the joy in his voice. Was he so happy to leave? Obviously... he can go back to his family, to his safe home. Why would he even want to stay any longer here? He has no reason. Tequila has to face the fact that this desperate want, no, need for a bond, for a relationship is one-sided.

"All right... let's go now"

The two turtles stood in front of that brown warehouse that Leo already had seen when they were after medicine. The door slowly opened, and a cheerful older woman greeted them.

"Hello, boys!" her cheerful voice and vibe made Leo smile. Even though the woman was in her 50s, her hair almost lost its original reddish color and her clothing style had changed, he could still feel the warmth of an old friend; April.

"Hi!" Leo waved his hand happily. Tequila just slightly nodded, then grabbed the door to help him find the inside. As he walked towards the room where their last meeting was, his steps became slower and slower. He wished they never reach the room, which, he knew, was a silly wish... but at least he could delay it a little.

"Welcome, welcome!" he heard a deep voice in front of him.

"Baxter Stockman" Tequila breathed.

"Long time no see" he added before turning toward the kid "So, you are the lost kiddo, aren't you?"

"Yeah..." Leo answered hesitantly. Was it Stockman? Did he work with April? Did he become an ally? How?

"No need to worry, we will help you. You just have to tell me about your world, alright?"

"Okay..."

"Okay, then follow me to the lab" Leo looked at Tequila, however, the old man did not react to anything that just happened. Leo knew he could sense him staring at him, and yet he chose to ignore him. It hurt. Why did he become so cold again?

As Stockman and Leo were leaving, April turned to Tequila.

"He looks like you" she stated.

"Turtles do look alike"

"Okay, okay, but still... he really reminds me of you"

"You couldn't even deny it."

As a sudden thought reminded him of Karai's words, it got him thinking. Was this what she mean? Was the kid really that similar to him? How interesting.

"What's his name?"

"I don't know.'

"You don't? How?" She exclaimed surprisedly "you've spent more than a month with him, yet you don't even know his name? Did you even talk to him?"

"I did not wish to bond with someone who's planning to leave"

April twisted her lips wryly. She felt like the old ninja turtle locked his soul so deep in his cell that he even forgot where he’d thrown the key.

"Everybody leaves anyway..." he added quietly, more to himself than her. April's gaze turned sorrowful. So this is how he felt? That everybody left him?

"Leo, listen. I know that you have troubles with your brothers, but you can always count on me. My door is open for you at all times." She said gently as placed her hand on his shoulder.

Tequila sighed.

"I know. But I also know that you say the same to my brothers. I can't know what you would say to them about me. They wouldn't be afraid to use any information against me"

"Oh my, Leo. Yes, I would support your brothers too, but I would never cause more trouble for you." She took a step back. "Also, your brothers avoided me just like you did. So, I was really surprised when you reached out to me. I'm glad that we talk again. I know you only talk to me because of that kid, but I hope we can keep in touch in the future."

Tequila hummed.

After a few minutes, he said "Maybe".

April smiled. A maybe from Leo meant a lot. It was closer to yes than no. So much closer.

A knock interrupted the two friends.

"Who's this?" Tequila asked. "Did you call someone here?"

"No. I have no idea who this is." She walked toward the front door. Tequila remained in the main room but focused on every noise in the warehouse. He heard as April opened the door followed by her surprised gasp.

"I'm looking for Leonardo. Is he here?"

Chapter Text

12

"There are three things extremely hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one's self."

- Benjamin Franklin -

"I'm looking for Leonardo. Is he here?"

Tequila took a step towards the door as a nervous breath caught trapped in his throat. The last time he heard this voice was 30 years ago and spoke no kind words to him.

"Michelangelo...?"

"So, you are really here."

"How did you know I'm here?" he asked suspiciously.

"I happened to wander around the area, and I just saw you coming in," he answered as he entered the room, not waiting for April's permission, "With your son."

"Ah, so is that why you're looking for me? Because you heard the news?" Tequila didn't make any move, so Michelangelo started to shorten their distance with slow but confident steps.

"How could you keep it away from me?" he asked with an offended tone, but Tequila knew he was not hurt by it. He wanted something, and it wasn't a family reconciliation.

"What do you want?"

"Oof, brother, that was pretty harsh," Tequila could feel him being only a step away from him. He could almost feel his breath. Just like on that night, when he lost his vision, he could feel only one brother's breath on his face in that abandoned alley. He wondered if it was Mikey's.

"I thought I was not your brother."

"Brothers fight all the time, but now that we're getting old, we should make peace."

Make piece? It made no sense to Tequila. What did he really want?

"And as your brother, I would like to meet my nephew."

Why is he so interested in that kid? Alright, he believes him to be his son, but that still didn't explain his sudden change of heart.

"Who told you about him?"

"Wait, wait," April spoke for the first time since Mikey arrived. "Son?"

Ah, yes. April didn't know about that misunderstanding.

"You don't know?" Michelangelo turned towards her. "Even though he's here?" he looked back to his brother. "Did you plan a surprise child reveal?"

April went to Tequila, grabbed his arm, and asked quietly. "What is he talking about?"

"I will explain."

"Yes, you will. Now," and with that, she dragged him into another room leaving the other turtle alone.

After they hid in the next room, April started to rub her temples as he asked. "So? He's not your son, or is he?"

"Why would I want a portal for him if he was?"

"To send him away from this hell. You know very well why we are still here. Traveling through a portal is highly dangerous and life-threatening for those who want to leave their original world! I only agreed to help you because I thought he was from a different world which would have helped him open a way in the portal. But if he's from here, then how is Baxter supposed to set up a location with no valid information?"

"April, listen," he lifted his hands defensively, "I didn't lie to you. He really came from a different world," he took a deep breath before continuing. "When I came here for the first time to talk about the portal, I told you that the kid was waiting outside. Well, until I was inside, Karai attacked him outside, and for some reason, she thought that he was my son. She also said that he's similar to me, it could have been that reason. She told Raphael about it, and he even met the kid, who didn't correct him, and neither did I, because I was too focused on the kid's wellbeing," he sighed again. "I guess, Raphael told Michelangelo. Raphael sounded pretty excited about being an uncle, perhaps he wanted to share this feeling."

"I see," she thought for a moment, "Maybe he's also excited? He always liked children."

"I don't know. Something feels off. It's hard to believe that it's just a coincidence that he saw us here. He must have been waiting, so he wants something, but not an uncle-nephew tea party for sure."

Michelangelo didn't think about waiting patiently for his hosts, he leaped into action. He started checking the rooms one by one.

Where could he be? Hmm.. oh wait. That guy... what was his name? Bliston Speckman? Nah... not that... there was surely an x in his name... Dexter? Nono... hmmm... ah! Baxter Stockman! So, he... he's working with April now, right? This is what Karai told him.

Then there has to be a lab here, he thought. Probably the kid was with him, even though he saw no understandable reason for it.

Leo was sitting in a white chair in front of Baxter's desk, where he noted every answer he gave. He had no idea how Stockman could figure out the location of his world based on such simple information, but he trusted his abilities. Not like he could do anything else.

As Stockman was rapidly hitting his keyboards, Leo fell into deep thoughts.

So... he can finally go home. It made him feel weird. He wanted it so bad, but still, now he didn't feel as happy as he should be. What was the reason? What was wrong with him...?

A memory popped up in his mind showing him and Tequila hugging on the couch after his nightmare. Yes…, he understood. He was worried about Tequila. But what was he really worried about? He was a well-trained ninja, who could defeat anyone, even as being blind. Sometimes he ate bad foods, but could he blame him in this world? Certainly not. He also learned that Tequila was him, or a version of him in the future. Was it still that worry that he felt when he learned about his potential future? Or was it something else? Was it for the old turtle’s soul?

He fell deeper into his thoughts as he was looking for answers. This world couldn't be his future after all. Karai was the Shredder's daughter here. If Tequila was him then he would still know the truth, even if Karai got brainwashed. He must be another version of him in an alternative universe, right? ...right?

Tequila helped him so much and what did he do for him in return? Kinda nothing. Tequila seemed different since he got the news. Leo didn't think about the older male's situation, only his own. He totally forgot that he's Tequila's only company and now he's going to leave him. It must hurt him. Especially since he still didn't know who Leo really is.

A strong grimace formed on his face. He felt ashamed for dismissing Tequila's feelings. After all, this is how he often felt at home - no one caring about how he really feels, all those nasty remarks from his brothers, the pressure from his father, and even his own mind pushed his feelings into the dark. And now he was doing the same to Tequila, who probably felt the same way growing up.

"Are you alright?" asked Baxter slightly concerned. Leo quickly relaxed his face and nodded. Baxter being kind and worried will never be not weird to him.

"Alright, then, let's continue. What-"

A knock interrupted the scientist. Stockman looked puzzled; April never knocked, since the lab was a shared area between him and her. And he strongly doubted that the old, blind turtle would be so polite to knock.

However, before he could have asked who was behind the door, the stranger entered.

"Hello!" Michelangelo greeted them loudly. "So here you are."

"Michelangelo?" Stockman exclaimed surprised. Seeing two out of the four ninja turtles on the same day? It hadn’t happened in the past 30 years.

"Yeah, it's me. Time hasn't touched me at all, huh?" he grinned. "But it did touch you. Last time I saw here you were merged with Hun, weren't you?"

"Yes, that's true. April helped me to be an independent individual again," he explained. He knew he would never forget how much April had helped him. She'd taken him in, even with Hun, and she'd also helped him rebuild his body. He will be always grateful for her.

"So that's how you've become so loyal to her. Kinda ironic, don't you think?"

"Things have changed and so had I."

"Indeed. Things reeeeeally have changed. My nephew here is the living proof," the old man put his hand on the young turtle's right shoulder. "Hello, little one. Uncle Raphie told me about you, so I, Uncle Mikey decided to visit you! Isn't that great?" he smiled. For a minute, he looked honestly joyful, but Leo knew that in this world he couldn't trust anyone. Not even Mikey. Based on what he'd learned from Tequila and Raphael, Michelangelo was no good. "Did your daddy tell me about me?"

Leo hesitantly looked away. Tequila didn't tell concrete things about him, he just felt that things were stormy between them.

"Now I'm hurt," he closed his eyes with feigned resentment. "Never mind. I will tell you about myself on our way to my place."

"Why would he go to your place?" asked the scientist raising an eyebrow.

"Because I wanna spend some time with my nephew. We have to catch up after not meeting for 15 years."

"What did you mean by 'daddy'?" Stockman asked again, "Do you know his father?"

"Of course. It looks like you don't know it either. It was a surprise for April too," he grinned. "My dear brother, Leonardo made a kiddo. I wonder how, tho..."

Baxter Stockman wasn't a stupid man. After interrogating the kid, he suspected that his world was connected with theirs, even though he was still at the simple questions, he just wasn't sure how. Confusion rose in him upon hearing Michelangelo's words. He knew that the child couldn't be Leonardo's son, but he also suspected that he wasn't just a random turtle.

A theory started forming in his mind, but he knew that wasn't the right time to ask questions anymore. After all, Michelangelo couldn't be trusted.

Stockman slowly reached under his desk for an emergency button to send a signal to April.

"Whatever is the case, I can't let him go with you."

"And why not?"

"Because we were in a middle of a conversation that you just interrupted."

"Well, let's continue talking then. Let me know my nephew better," he reached out for a chair to pull it under himself, but before he could have sat down, April and Tequila entered the lab.

"Hello, there," Mikey greeted them with a short wave, then sat down. "Wanna join us?"

"Why are you here?" Tequila asked dangerously.

"I told you, bro."

"I want to know the real reason, Michelangelo," he gritted his teeth in anger, "You are still bad at lying...bro"

"Mikey, let's talk outside, okay? We shouldn't scare the child," April suggested nervously. She was afraid of a fight between the brothers.

"Oh my, am I scaring you?" Mikey looked at Leo, who just turned his head away, in the direction of Tequila, who still seemed to be ignoring him.

"Don't be scared," he spoke in a quieter voice, "I just wanna know you," then he also looked at Tequila, "But the adults here are not making this easy for us."

Leo turned back to him. That was the first time he really looked at him since he entered the lab. He just noticed how old and dark he had become. His eyes showed surprise, anger, and sorrow as he saw his missing arm. It broke his heart to see what had happened to his little brother.

"Okay, guys. Last chance. You three go out so we can have a little chit-chat."

"I won't leave him alone with you," Tequila fumed.

Michelangelo released a sigh.

"Okay," and with that, he stood up like he was about to leave.

"Remember, this is not how I wanted," he added before he pulled out a transmitter, lifted it up to his mouth, and simply said, "Your turn."

Chapter Text

13

"Without self-knowledge, without understanding the working and functions of his machine, man cannot be free, he cannot govern himself and he will always remain a slave."

- G. I. Gurdjieff -

"Remember, this is not how I wanted," he added before he pulled out a transmitter, lifted it up to his mouth, and simply said, "Your turn."

"Who did you call for?" Tequila gritted his teeth as he stormed towards Michelangelo.

"Just a friend," he answered calmly, taking a step back. Leonardo's anger still scared him. He wasn't like Raph. Raphael angriness had become too normal for him. This is how the red-banded turtle worked. But not Leonardo.

Tequila grabbed him by the shoulder and yanked him towards himself. Michelangelo's blood froze for a moment and started to question if this plan was really a good idea when someone broke the window and jumped in with a few Foot Soldiers. Tequila turned towards the noise but could not tell who disturbed them.

"You!" he heard April's hissed and sensed as everybody tensed in the room. Even Michelangelo.

"Karai..." he breathed as the realization hit him. Of course. Karai and her father won't rest until they caught all of them. Her presence wasn't a surprise... but Michelangelo's betrayal was. No matter how much hatred they had towards each other, he would have never believed that any of them worked for the Shredder.

"Alright, here's my deal," she started as she walked towards Leo and landed a hand on his shoulder. The young turtle froze under her touch but made no sound, "You give me the boy and later you may visit him."

"What? I will never give him to you," he spitted. "He has no use for you anyway."

"He has a greater use than you would believe."

"Isn't your goal to catch me? Then come on, catch me! Why would you take an unnecessary move?"

"My goal is not that simple. But don't worry, you will understand it in time."

After she nodded, two soldiers jumped at the young turtle and forced him out of his chair.

"Wait, no!" Tequila desperately reached out towards the kid, but Michelangelo grabbed his wrist. "Let me go!" He tried to free his hand out of his brother's grasp, but Michelangelo was tightening his fingers so hard that his knuckles whitened out. It would have hurt Tequila if his mind was clear. However, the worry was choking him, making his strength leave his body. He only had one chance; he grabbed Michelangelo by his collar with his free hand and pressed a pressure point causing his brother to collapse.

Tequila grabbed one of the Foot Soldiers and tore him away from Leo. He reached towards the other one too when Karai jumped between them.

"Leonardo, you don't have to worry. We will have a chance to spar with each other soon enough. Until then, I will take care of your son," she spoke slowly and calmly, staring into her own reflection displayed on Leonardo's glasses. She placed a hand on his cheek and gently caressed it with her thumb. She leaned closer, so close that their lips almost met. Leonardo's breath hitched as he remembered the old times. Peace was never part of their life, not even in the old, fading past... yet he would have done anything to go back. For a minute, he even forgot where he was and what was happening. But only for a minute, before a sharp pain brought him back into reality.

Karai stabbed a small blade into his neck. It was a retractable hook-like blade of a ring, filled with poison.

Leonardo clapped his hand to the wound, slowly losing balance. He groaned as he fell on his knees, fighting to keep his eyes open. He could hear April's and Baxter's worried voices but couldn't understand what they said. He used all of his energy to focus on the kid. He was calling for him. He sounded scared. For him, or himself, he did not know, but he needed to help. He tried to get up but fell back at once.

Michelangelo started to get the control back over his body and slowly rose to his feet. He sent a questioning glare to Karai, not appreciating this unplanned move.

"What did you do to him?" April demanded while she and Stockman were holding Leonardo up. She gently tapped Leonardo's cheek to keep him awake. Her fingers were trembling with worry as she kept her furious gaze on Karai.

"Don't worry too much," she smirked and took a little bottle out of her pocket, "Here's the antidote. If you want it, then you let us leave with the boy in peace and Leonardo survives."

Breathing became harder and harder with each passing second for Leonardo. He gritted his teeth in pain as he tried to shake his head as a 'no'. He didn't trust his voice anymore, but he couldn't let April agree to this.

April and Stockman looked at each other, both expecting the other one to come up with a good idea.

Karai knew that they wouldn't let Leonardo die for a kid they barely know. She knew how well Leonardo had hidden from everyone in the past decades and was sure that he hadn't told anyone about the boy. At least, not until they needed something from April.

She didn't dwell on it too long; she would eventually learn everything once she has the boy.

After a minute of silence, Michelangelo grabbed the boy and dragged him out of the lab. Leo just let him pull him away. He kept his eyes on his old counterpart and quietly walked next to Michelangelo. It was over, he knew it. They had no choice but to go along with Karai's plan. He just hoped that she would really give Tequila the antidote.

Karai threw the bottle towards April, then ordered her soldiers to destroy the lab.

"No!" Stockman desperately tried to defend his supplies and machines, but only chaos and slivers remained.

Leo shuddered at the shrill noises of destruction. His heart ached as he realized that they probably destroyed the portal too. He looked away and closed his eyes. Soon he felt himself fly back to the dojo, sitting across from his father with a cup of tea and enjoying his comfort while listening to his wise words. He felt the warmth of the dojo and the relaxing scent of the incense.

A tug on his arm tore him out of the memory and the sudden cold and fear hit him again. Oh, how he wished Splinter had been there!

Chapter Text

14

"I want, by understanding myself, to understand others."

- Katherine Mansfield -

It's been almost 2 months since Leo disappeared. Raph, Donnie, and Mikey have been roaming around the city every day since then, looking under every rock and every sewer rat, but they found nothing.

Sometimes Splinter also joined them, while other times he remained at home, waiting for his son to enter the lair. That day was a day like that. He was trying to meditate in the dojo, hoping to calm himself until his sons come back. He was the father, he had to be strong, a pillar of strength who could give enough support and comfort to the boys. However, the more days passed, the more miserable they all became. The turtles couldn't find comfort in their father's words and hugs anymore. They could only think that Leo didn't have that. He was somewhere alone and probably scared, maybe injured. And no one who would comfort or protect him.

Master Splinter released a disappointed sigh as he opened his eyes. He could not focus. A headache was bothering him, probably caused by the lack of sleep and food. Since Leo disappeared his nights became an endless pit that he dug deeper and deeper with each thought. His eyes were red, and his movements tragically slowed down.

Slowly, he approached the kitchen with the help of his walking stick. He grabbed a pot and filled it with water. Maybe some tea would help, he thought. Just like every day. No matter how much tea he had drunk nothing had become better. But he needed a thing in his life that he could trust. Something that could help him keep his sanity.

He put the pot over the fire, then sit down on a chair at the table.

Only 2 months passed, and he already felt like he was living his last days. What will happen after 2 years? How will he take care of Raphael, Donatello, and Michelangelo in the far future if he's already such a mess after 2 months? He needed to get his things together, no matter how much it hurt... Losing another child... as a mutant family he knew it was very possible, but he hoped-... prayed that it wouldn't happen.

His sons had to go through so many things at such a young age. They were mutants, they were ninjas, they were outcasts... yet they were just children.

As the leader, Leonardo carried the biggest burden of the team. And he was only 15! When he, Hamato Yoshi was 15, his biggest problem his grades were, not survival...

The unknown pained him. He had no idea what to do. They couldn't find Leonardo neither at the TCRI nor the Shredder's lair. The thought of a new enemy worried him. The thought of the horrors Leonardo may go through terrified him. He let out a shaky sigh as vivid images of torture and blood flitted through his mind.

Soft footsteps brought him back to reality. One, two, three... Three. Again.

Instead of greeting his sons at the entrance, he finished making the tea and poured it into four cups. The turtles knew that their father was in the kitchen, so they headed there immediately. Master Splinter just took a look at them - to make sure they were okay and also to see if they learned something new. He needed only one second to get answers to both questions. They were fine, but the mission didn't help them to move forward. Just the usual, unfortunately.

They drank the tea in complete silence. None of them could talk from the loud storm in their head.

After like half an hour, Mikey broke the quietness.

"What now?"

"What do you mean?" Raph asked confused.

"What are we going to do?"

"Keep looking. Continue the original plan," the red-clad turtle explained calmly, ignoring his brother's hinting.

"The original plan failed, Raph..."

"So what? You want to just stop it?"

"Of course not. We just can't find him... like he would have left this world..."

"He's alive!" Raphael raised his voice and clenched his fists, refusing to even think about the possibility of his brother's death.

"Yes, yes, I know," Mikey held his hands up defensively. "But I think we need to think about other options than the Kraangs and the Shredder..."

"Mikey's right," Donnie spoke and Raphael raised a brow ridge. "I know, I know, but he's really right. Perhaps we are indeed looking in the wrong direction. We may have to face a new enemy."

"Bullshit. Who else would know about us?"

"Well, this is something we need to figure out. As soon as possible," he jumped up from his seat and turned around to head towards his lab when his father stopped him.

"You all should rest now. If you do not give the needed sleep to your bodies, you will only put yourselves in danger as well."

"But sensei-"

A sharp gaze silenced the turtles and obeyed their father.

Splinter walked back to the dojo, hoping he could meditate a bit to help him calm his mind and fall asleep.

He sat down in lotus position in front of the tree and closed his eyes. Slowly, he relaxed his muscles from head to toe.

Finally, after a lot of unsuccessful days, he could feel his soul enter the astral plane. He released a relieved sigh and enjoyed the long-awaited tranquility.

However, not even a minute later, someone's presence broke him out of his idyllic state.

His eyes snapped open and glanced around. As the attendance became stronger and stronger, he started to recognize the familiar aura.

"Leonardo?"

"Sensei!" he heard a yell and sprung around to see his son running towards him.

"Leonardo! My son!"

Leonardo jumped into his father's embrace and buried his face into the old rat's chest.

"Father..." his voice broke as he tightened his grip around Splinter. Master Splinter started to draw circles on his son's shell with his finger to soothe him.

"It is all right, you do not have to worry," he spoke in a gentle voice. "Soon, you will be home again."

Leonardo sobbed and let his tears soak his sensei's robe. Splinter's heart shattered into million little pieces hearing his brave son crying so sorrowfully. He feared what could have happened to him.

"My son," he put his hand on Leo's head. "What happened? Where are you now?"

"A Kraang somehow sent me into another world... or the future... I don't know. Everything is so messy! I feel so confused..."

"Another world? What world? How can we reach you there?" Splinter focused on the most important part now: to bring Leo home. He can comfort him later.

"I don't know... Stockman is working on a portal for me... at least, he worked. I guess Karai destroyed it..."

"Stockman...? And Karai?" the rat was puzzled. How did they get into this story?

"It's complicated, but probably I'm in an alternative world of ours. I met the counterparts of our family."

"So, they can help you, right?"

"I'm not sure... Right now, I'm in a cell."

"A cell? Why? Did somebody hurt you?" Splinter was alarmed within a nanosecond.

"No... but the Shredder and Karai caught me. They have plans with me. I don't know what kind of plans... I just hope that Tequila saves me before I could learn it..." he whispered.

"Tequila?" Splintered wondered. This name didn't ring any bell. Were they not a counterpart?

"I... I will tell you later..." Leonardo started to lose his energy and his father realized with fear that his son was slipping out of the astral plane, and his arms as well.

"Please, my son, tell me how I can help you?" his voice was shaking, thinking it was the only chance he could talk to Leonardo.

"I don't know..." his words became quieter and quieter just as his image was fading. "I will try to contact you later," and he disappeared.

"Leonardo!" Splinter yelled after him, but it was too late. He got no reply.

He gasped as his eyes snapped open. He looked around and realized that he was back in the dojo. He needed some minutes to catch his breath.

The sound of footsteps hit his ears. Didn't he tell them to go to sleep? He looked at the entrance and saw Raphael entering.

"Why are you not sleeping?" Splinter asked with a mix of annoyance and worry.

"I can't... so... I thought I could meditate," Raph said so shyly that Splinter wondered if it was really Raphael or just an illusion.

"Meditate?" his father turned his head back with closed his eyes, "You may join."

Master Splinter cracked an eye open and watched as his usually hot-tempered son sat down in lotus position and took a deep breath. He slowly closed his eyes and seemed to focus on relaxation. The old rat took it as a bad sign. He had always told Raphael to ease his anger with meditation, but he'd always refused. Whenever Raphael decided to meditate yet was when he felt extremely distressed. Leonardo's disappearance had made a great impact on him. Splinter was not the only one who had trouble sleeping and eating.

Raphael and Leonardo may seemed polar opposites, but they had more in common than one would believe. They fought a lot... very lot, but they also found peace with each other. They used to be inseparable. Even as babies, they clinged to each other day and night. Of course, as teenagers, they drew a line between themselves, but that line never fattened this big. Now, first in their life, they got separated, and it sickened Raphael.

Chapter Text

15

"The true cure for self-righteousness is self-knowledge."

- J. C. Ryle -

April's and Stockman's lab was destroyed, and nothing remained from the portal. Tequila crumbled down on the couch at his hideout. He felt a little dizzy, but his despair oppressed the pain. He had to- no, needed to get the boy back. His hands were shaking as he frantically tried to control his breathing. It hurt. It hurt way more than he ever imagined.

Karai had a goal. A greater goal than capturing him. But what? What kind of trap did she plan out for him?

He didn't care. He only cared about the boy's safety. He had nothing else to worry about. He already lost his family, his honor, and his life. He was just a living shell with no meaning.

He had to figure out something. It's been 30 years since he had to make a plan. Obviously, he needed minor plans to get food and supplies... but this plan required complex fighting and outsmarting Karai. Maybe he could have done it 30 years ago. But now? He was out of practice. He had become old and blind. Was he even a ninja anymore? He did not know...

Also, the Shredder's new hideout was an unknown area for him. How could he plan anything if he doesn't even know where he's going? In the past 30 years, he only moved around in his area. He was not sure what would happen in a new place. Could he adapt? Or would he fail?

He feared the worst.

And he feared that he couldn't do it alone.

He could think of only one person. Only he could help him now.

Oh, how he hated this situation! Not enough that he failed as the kid's caretaker, but now he has to beg for his so-called brother's help. He loathed it. But he had no other choice... he won't put his pride before the kid's life.

Loud ringing woke the old turtle up. He yelped up startled and fell out of his hammock. He stood up with the help of his nightstand and after a few curses, he accepted the call.

"What?" he groaned.

"Um... hello."

"Ah, damn," and with that he ended the call. Did Leonardo still have his number? Man... he deleted his years ago.

His phone rang again. It was the same number.

"Geez..." he declined.

The ringing restarted immediately.

"Ugh... if you insist..." he lifted his phone to his ear-slit.

"Raphael, please, don't hang up!" said a desperate voice.

Wow. This day was getting really interesting. First, Leonardo calls him, then he says "please". What could have happened?

"What do ya want?" he grumbled.

"Um... listen... are you busy today?"

"It depends. Why?"

"I..."

After a minute of silence, Raphael spoke.

"So?"

"Ah, yes... so I... I need your help."

Raphael had to take the phone away from his ear-slit as he shook his head in disbelief. He took a deep breath and narrowed his eye as he lifted the phone back.

"In what?"

"So, you will help, right?" Leonardo's voice trembled, awakening a slight worry in Raphael.

"Answer the question. What happened?"

"They took him... they took him."

"Took who?"

"Him... your nephew."

"Holy shit!" Panic rose in the one-eyed turtle. "Who took him??"

"Karai... she said he had some use for them. I don't know what they are planning to do to him..." he sniffed. "Raph, please, help me rescue him."

"... of course," he sighed. "I know things are kinda trashy between us, but I would never turn my shell on yer kid."

"Thank you. Do you remember the place where we last met?"

"When ya refused my medicine?" Raphael looked annoyed for a moment as he remembered it.

"Yeah... can you come here? We should talk about the rest in person."

"Alright. I will be there in 20 minutes."

Raphael didn't waste any second rushing to the meeting place. It's been ages since he rushed to help Leonardo or since they worked together. If he had to be honest, he still held some grudge against him, but he never wanted anything bad to happen to him. Especially not to his child. Oh, that little innocent boy.

No, he couldn't let his imagination feed his concern and fear. He couldn't.

He'd chosen the shortest path which meant he had to cross an area that he almost forgot. His eye immediately spotted the worn tomb. He slowed his movements until he completely stopped, right in front of the grave.

Splinter.

He was not sure whether his brothers had still visited their father. He surely hadn't. Even though his father was dead, he could not face him. He was haunting him in his nightmares, his disappointed look engraved deep into his mind.

He was a failure.

He couldn't keep his last promise.

He had promised to keep the family together. To help his brothers. To help Leo and Mikey adapt to this new life with their disability. He'd only lost an eye; his brothers had needed help and comfort more than he had. But he'd kept it all for himself. He couldn't share, 'cause it hadn't even been enough for himself.

He failed at every point he had promised to his father.

Splinter'd left in peace thinking that his sons would stick together and survive whatever life throws at them. And he'd died with false hope being fed by his own son.

Well, until now, they survived everything for sure. But at what cost? What had they become?

Raphael clenched his fists and lowered his head. His unhurt eye watered and his body shook in shame, disappointment, and disgust that he felt towards himself.

He only allowed it for a moment, then he quickly dried his eye with the sleeve of his coat.

He took a deep breath and reminded himself of his destination.

He was needed and he won't fail now.

He will help Leonardo and his son, no matter what.

"What??" Mikey's with the Shredder??!" Raphael exclaimed jumping up from the couch. "What the shell? What the fucking shell? Are ya sure?"

"Yes. You may ask April and Stockman if you don't believe me," Leonardo sighed.

"Nah... it's just... damn. What the heck happened to that shell-for-brains?" he sat back, still fuming.

"I don't know... Maybe he hates us so much that even the Shredder is better a choice."

"I don't get it. No matter how much I can hate yer gut, I would never help the fricking Shredder! How could Mikey do that? Did he forget what he did to us? He killed Splinter!"

"Well, you can ask him yourself later. If we manage to find a way inside," Leonardo rubbed his temples, feeling helpless.

"Ah, yeah, right. So, what's the plan?" Raphael calmed his tone as he focused on the mission again.

"To be honest, I hoped you would have an idea. You know the outside world better than me. I thought you would have more information about the Shredder too."

"I don't know much. Sometimes I spar with Karai, but she obviously never shared any valuable info with me."

"You're sparring with her?!"

"So what? I'm not working for her! She's good, keeps me fit both physically and mentally," Leonardo didn't say anything, yet he didn't seem satisfied with the answer. Raphael groaned. "Well, at least, it wasn't me who wet his sheets for her!"

"Wh-what? That never happened!" The blind man turned his head away, fearing a possible blush that could have given Raphael a reason to continue teasing him.

Raphael huffed.

"Anyway, once I was at the hideout, which is not even a hideout since a lot of people know about it."

"Well, I don't."

"Of course not, ya blindie antisocial."

"You mean asocial."

"What?"

"The right term."

"Geez, don't be Donnie."

Tequila hummed.

Donatello.

It'd been a while since he thought about him.

"Do you ever miss him?" he asked quietly. It caught Raphael off guard. First Splinter, now Donnie... too many painful memories for one day.

"Yes. A lot."

"...me too," he sighed. "I miss Donnie. I miss Father. I miss us and our old life. ...I miss my sight..." he buried his face in his hands. "I miss him..."

Raphael's glance softened and placed a hand on his brother's knee.

"There's a lot of things we can't bring back, but I swear we will bring him back home."

"Thank you, Raphael... it means a lot to me," he put his hand on his brother's. "I don't know what I would have done if you had refused to help me..."

Raphael patted Leonardo's knee with his fingers. He cleared his throat as the sudden mushiness reached his mental limits. "Alright, let's focus on the plan, okay?"

"Okay..."

Leo was laying on the hard, cold floor in a cell, trying to fall asleep, at least for a minute. However, he could only focus on the conversation with Master Splinter that just happened a few minutes ago. He had to leave the astral plane sooner than he wanted to, but he was too weak to keep up the connection any longer. The stress and the constant fear drastically weakened him.

His eyelids closed and he tried to concentrate on the dark, but sudden footsteps made his eyes snap open. He lifted his head and looked at the other side of the bars.

Michelangelo looked down at him with an unreadable expression on his face.

"Let's talk."

Chapter Text

16

"Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them."

- Albert Einstein -

Leo woke up in the Shredder's throne room, laying on his side, his hands and legs tightly tied. He couldn't even remember when he passed out, and how...

He slowly lifted his head and analyzed the room. It was empty. He rolled himself onto his plastron and pushed himself on his knees. This way, he could see more of the dark room. As he turned his head, he noticed a figure in the edge of his eyes.

"Hah!" he yelped as the figure jumped in front of him. It was Karai.

"So, we meet again, little boy," she smirked. "Do you miss your daddy?"

Leo narrowed his eyes. "Where's yours?"

"It's just me now. But if you don't talk to me, next time, you can chat with my father."

"What do you have?"

"What do you mean?" she raised an eyebrow.

"That makes Mikey work for you. He wouldn't do it on his own!"

"Are you sure about that?" she squatted down on his level and tilted her head. "To the best of my knowledge, your daddy and the turtles don't see each other as family anymore. Therefore, Michelangelo has no reason to refuse to help me."

"Where is he now?"

"It's my turn to ask, little boy. Who is your mother?"

"Why is the Shredder so interested in my family tree?"

"Oh, that's my question. I'm curious who Leo courted to."

"...I don't know my mother."

"Did Leonardo never tell you how you were born?"

"He doesn't like to talk about the past." Leo broke the eye-contact. "There's a lot of things even I don't know about, so you kidnapped the wrong turtle, Karai."

"Even without information, you are still useful to me. Your daddy will come to rescue you."

"If you want him, why bother with me?"

"Without you, Leonardo wouldn't care about any kind of threat. Whenever I saw him after his rat master's death, he seemed like who wished to die. Knowing that April and her little friends would take care of you, he wouldn't mind dying here. But your death, that's something, he certainly doesn't want, so he will be cooperative with the Foot. Plus, this way, Raphael is more likely to come here as well."

"I'm sure there could have been an easier way to catch them."

"That's true. But isn't it more fun if they come here on their own?"

"Are these your words or your father's?"

Karai was taken aback. She showed surprise for a moment, then calmed her facial muscles once again.

"My father knows the best what's good for the Foot. And what is good for the Foot, is good for me."

"That didn't answer my question."

She took a deep breath. "What are you trying to achieve, little boy?"

"I just believe that you are different from the Shredder."

"What makes you think that?"

"My family and I are still alive. You are the one who leads the missions. You had 30 years, yet you let us live our lives."

"That's-"

The door opened and Michelangelo entered.

"What are you doing here?" asked Karai.

"Let him examine the boy. Your plan will succeed without his torture too." he spoke firmly, taking a glance at the young boy to see if he arrived in time.

"How emotional you have become about him."

"Well, he's my nephew."

"Yeah, you still offered to catch him for me," she rolled her eyes as she stood up. Michelangelo looked away in shame.

"Whatever... the point is that Leonardo and Raphael met up, so they will come here soon."

"Wonderful," she pulled Leo up. "He's yours."

The old turtle quickly took Leo by the arm and dragged him out of the throne room.

"Where are you taking me?"

"To the doc. He will check you up and explain some stuff."

"Like why you are doing this?"

"Yeah... listen," he stopped and faced the boy. "I know what you may think about me. Uncle Mikey gave you to the Shredder... you must hate me, and I get it. But it was never against your person."

"Then it's against your brothers... I mean, they are not your brothers anymore, right?"

"It's kind of complicated... All of us went through some serious stuff. All of us made mistakes and somehow it escalated pretty bad."

"Do you hate them?"

Michelangelo continued to lead Leo on that dark corridor.

"No."

"Why do you act like that, then?"

"Because they hate me."

"If that's your only reason, then you are being very stupid."

"Hey! Respect the older, kid!"

"Then act like someone who deserves respect!"

"Huh... no mercy towards old Mikey, huh?"

Leo pressed his lips in annoyance. Michelangelo looked at him gently, guilt clearly shown on his face. Leo was a bit relieved to see that. Mikey still has a chance to return to his old self, at least, he hoped.

"But really, how were you born?"

"I'd rather not share it with you."

"Okay, okay, got it."

"Maybe April could help," Raphael mentioned as he prepared green tea for his distressed brother.

"I don't want to endanger more people than necessary."

"I get it. But I'm not sure if just the two of us will be enough..." Raphael walked back to the couch with the hot tea and put it into Leonardo's hands.

"Argh... I can't understand Mikey..." Leonardo sipped from the cup.

"He better has a good reason to be such a dumbass!" Raphael clenched his fists. Leonardo nodded, then silence fell on them for long minutes. Leonardo focused on his tea, while Raphael was waiting for his brother to say something smart because he was at a loss for words.

"Raph..."

"Yeah?"

"Do you think things can be ever like in the old times? I mean... I know that some things can't be brought back, as you said it too... but could we build up a new life based on our old?"

"I don't know Leo... I would like to say that we can fix it... but I'm not sure. So many years passed... all of us got hurt, and we all still have some underlying displeasure about each other."

"That's right... not enough that the Shredder hurt us, we were cruel to each other too." Leonardo sighed. "I know that I hurt you... and Mikey... I let my anger and grief get the better of me."

"This happened to all of us... Look, I'm not saying that we should just forget everything and ride off into the sunset... after all, just a few hours ago, even yer voice made me mad... We won't solve it overnight, but it's not impossible."

"Wow, Raphael... your brain aged well."

Raphael narrowed his eyes smacked Leonardo on the head.

"Hey, it was a compliment!" his brother held his hands up in defense.

"Ya implied that I was stupid!"

"Well..."

"Don't. Answer. Don't ya dare!" he growled slightly. "With ya, might work. With Mikey, I don't know. He seems too lost, especially after his latest mission..."

Leonardo drank the last drops of the tea, then looked in Raphael's direction. Leonardo thought for a moment.

"Do you think Master Splinter's death was my fault?"

Raphael took the cup from his brother and put it on the coffee table.

"I used to. Even when I met yer son. I talked a lot of shit about ya to him... on the way here, I visited Splinter... he would be really mad at us now. I thought it through what I did... I wasn't any better than ya and Mikey. You were the leader, blaming ya was so easy, but I just didn't wanted to think about my own actions and responsibility." then, he chuckled a bit. "I guess I was blinder than ya."

Leonardo smiled and leaned against his brother.

"It's a good start for a better future."

"Sit down, little Leo," Mikey offered a chair in the lab. Leo sat down and look around. No one else was there, just the lab stuff he couldn't even name.

"So... someone will examine me, right?" Leo asked shyly.

"Yes. He will be here soon."

"Who's the doc here?"

Michelangelo didn't answer right away. He squeezed the boy's shoulder and sighed.

"Soon, you will understand me."

Chapter Text

17

"Only two kinds of people can attain self-knowledge: those who are not encumbered at all with learning, that is to say, whose minds are not over-crowded with thoughts borrowed from others; and those who, after studying all the scriptures and sciences, have come to realise that they know nothing."

- Ramakrishna –

5 months ago

Michelangelo woke up the way he always did in the past 30 years - grumpy. He reached towards his missing arm, touching what was left. He sighed as he sat up on the bed. Was it morning or already in the evening - he didn't know. He just saw that there was no Sun. He lived in an abandoned train station, but when the Foot was too busy in his area, he hid in the nearby subway station, close to the sewers. Sometimes he just went there to nap and feel the smell of rotten things, like in the old times. Rarely he even visited their old home, sitting amongst the debris and rubble to have a nostalgic day. Those were very lonely days. And this day seemed to be like that too.

Michelangelo visited the sewers again. As he reached his old home, he longingly stared at the Sewer Sweet Sewer table that he put on the pile of rocks at the entrance.

His home is destroyed, and so is his life. He's all alone, hiding from the Foot all the time. His father was dead. And his brothers... were not his brothers anymore. He couldn't even tell when the last time was that he saw them. He had a faint idea where they could live, but he couldn't know for sure. Sometimes an urge ambushed him, making him wish to look for his brothers, to make peace with them and rebuild the family from what has remained.

But he always quickly dismissed this pang in his heart. He knew what his father would say but couldn't bring himself to fulfill his ghost's wishes. What was good in this world anymore? As long as the Shredder is in charge, no amount of work could bring peace for them. Even if he got in touch with his brothers, they wouldn't be able to maintain a brotherly relationship anymore.

Or at least, that's what he believed in. He tried to believe it.

When the urge attacked him, he forced himself to. He had to believe that there was no other way. Otherwise, not sure he would have lived to another tomorrow. If those responsibilities and what-ifs would sink deep in his mind, his heart... he couldn't bear to keep going.

"Attention servant of the Shredder, your Lord and Master will now address you."

Again, this speech. Was it replayed again or was he just hallucinating? Wouldn't be the first time.

"For those of you who are still living under the illusion that you will have freedom, know this: My armies have exterminated the last pockets of resistance and I now control the entire planet. The traitorous Utrom scientists I have captured are completing a colossal transmat device. With it, I will send forth my armies and enslave the start, one world after another! There is no hope. There is only the Shredder."

Mikey shook at the thought. In the past months, he had heard this many, many times, yet each time terrifies him just like the first time he had heard it. Same voices, same faces, same words, and the same old fear. Same as it always has been in this new era.

"Remember, the Shredder is always watching."

For a moment, he wondered how does it make Leo feel? Karai, whom he trusted so bad, liked so bad, destroyed their whole life and after everything, she's still supporting the Shredder.

He sighed and he turned around and left his old home behind, the only place that helped him keep his sanity.

As he reached the closest manhole, he climbed out to the surface and stopped.

This urge again.

Splinter.

Ahh, where should he go now? Back to the station or to his grave?

Not like he would be busy... but the thought of facing his father still scared him. He wasn't sure what's after death, but he knew if there was any kind of afterlife, then Splinter was spending his never-ending days watching his stubborn sons hiding from the world, from each other. He must be full of fury and disappointment. He was so scared just like the 7-year-old Mikey who just broke his father's favorite vase.

However, now he was an adult man, and he couldn’t hide from his father forever. So he collected his courage, turned towards the grave, and jumped on a rooftop.

As he was getting closer, he heard a helicopter and a vehicle approaching the area.

"Attention, citizen!" he saw as armed men got out and surrounded a dark figure. "Place your hands in the air and drop your weapons! Repeat! Hands up and drop your weapons!"

Michelangelo took a closer look and noticed a bō.

Can't be!

How...?

Is he... back?

The figure drew his bō staff and Mikey knew he had to interfere. He threw ninja stars in front of the soldiers, grabbing their attention.

"On the roof! Get a light on him! Fire! Open fire!"

Just like every day. Dodging the lasers, unarming the soldiers took merely 5 minutes to him nowadays. He felt as his body moved automatically, while his mind could only focus on the familiar figure in the middle of the chaos.

"Mikey?"

But the fight was still on, when his nunchucks were not enough anymore, he grabbed a laser rifle and blew three armored vehicles, then fired again, now at the helicopter, and watched as it crashed down.

"Mikey! Am I glad to see you!"

He only turned around now.

Donnie...

His long-lost brother looked at him from head to toe. Michelangelo felt that horrific confusion radiating out of Donatello.

"Mikey, your-- your arm! What happened to your arm?"

"You're the one that's got some questions to answer. Where the shell have you been all these years?"

His sudden joy disappeared, and anger resurfaced again. That is why he feared to confront his brothers. He was afraid he would not be able to stop himself.

"All these years?"

"You've been gone over thirty years, Donatello."

30 years, yet he changed nothing. How could it be?

"Thirty years? It can't be!"

"Can be and is. We thought you were dead. How the shell could you just abandon us like that?"

Tears were torturing his eyes, but he did not let them escape. Not now... not in front of this traitor.

"I didn't. I'd never abandon you guys. One minute, we were all in the lair together. The next minute, I woke up here. I don't know how."

Huh...what the… maybe he let his anger out on someone else? Or more like, the wrong version? But how was that possible?

"So, the turtle with the big brain finally doesn't have all the answers. Who'd a thunk it?" he turned back towards his original destination. "But we can't talk here. Come on!"

Michelangelo slipped into the shadow and Donatello followed him. As they were going from one building to another, Karai's voice was ringing in the air once again.

"Where are we going, Mikey?" Donnie asked confused.

"I'm taking you to Master Splinter."

"Are Leo and Raph with him?"

"You kidding? Leo and Raph aren't with anybody anymore." Silly Donatello, if he knew...

"Huh?"

As they got closer, Mikey told Donatello about the years he missed out. His disappearance, Leo's and Raph's fight, the Shredder...

"What about Master Splinter?"

"He's over there," he points towards the grave on the other side of the road. The name 'Splinter' is craved into the wood and his walking stick leaned against it.

"No!" Donatello ran to the grave and dropped to his knees. "No, he can't be…"

He couldn't stop the tears. He clenched his fists and his body shook.

"H-how?"

"A couple of years after you disappeared, Master Splinter gave his life protecting the three of us."

"I can't believe it! How could this all happen?" he wiped his tears off his cheek and looked up at his 'brother'. "Maybe I can't change the past, but that doesn't mean there isn't a way to change the present. We've gotta face the Shredder and take him down!"

Mikey almost burst out in laughing. Oh, poor naive boy.

"We already tried too many times."

"We're going to try again, Mikey!

"You got a plan?"

"I'm working on it," Donnie responded desperately. There must be a way, he thought-- he hoped. "But we're going to need Leo and Raph."

"That's a tall order, Donnie," he sighed. Leo and Raph are out of the question for now, so what could he do? Maybe...ah wait, does he really want to restart it all? But... it wouldn't hurt to give a chance to this Donnie... right? "but I think I know somebody that can help."

"Really? Who is it?"

An icy shot went through his body as he heard that voice. But now, not over the public speaker.

"Karai?" Donatello took a step back. He felt as if her eyes pierced a hole into his head. She seemed way more dangerous than as he remembered.

"Donatello. Our sensors have identified you. I wouldn't have believed that I would see you again."

"You better leave! Can't you see that it's a family reunion?"

"Reunion? Hardly... this is not even the right Donatello."

"How do you know?" Mikey pointed his finger into her face. He gritted his teeth and narrowed his eyes as he stared into her green eyes. "You are the one behind his disappearance, aren't you?"

Karai smirked at the turtle.

"Do you wish to see him?"

"You... you have him, right? He's... alive, right?" His voice trembled a bit as he spoke. He cleared his throat and continued the vicious glare.

"You are not as observant as you used to be," she chuckled as he gestured behind the turtles. "You are surrounded."

"It's part of my everyday routine," Mikey growled and pulled out his nunchucks. Donnie grabbed his bō  and looked around. They were hiding among the trees.

"But not with my team."

Chapter Text

18

"Resolve to be thyself: and know that he who finds himself, loses his misery."

- Matthew Arnold -

Donnie, still shaken by the number of tragedies he just learned, barely heard when Karai mentioned his counterpart.

"You... you have him, right? He's... alive, right?" Donnie finally saw that this Michelangelo has feelings too. Tears were shining in his eyes and his lips trembled as he looked at Karai.

"You are not as observant as you used to be," Karai chuckled and pointed behind them. "You are surrounded."

"It's part of my everyday routine," Mikey narrowed his eyes and grabbed his nunchucks. Donnie reached for his weapon too as he looked around.

"But not with my team," she smirked, unsheathed her katana, and swung it towards Michelangelo. The older turtle's determination was unshaken and blocked her relentless attacks.

Donnie focused on the others, spun, and twirled, and created a barrier around his brother and Karai. Her movements were fluid and sharp, with every strike, breaking Michelangelo's defense. Donnie managed to disarm some soldiers with a sweeping strike, sending them to the ground. But another form lunged at him from behind. A robot, which looked like Karai, quickly disarmed the stunned turtle, and sent his bō spinning away. It landed at Michelangelo's feet, who was still trying to outsmart Karai. The older turtle's focus changed on Donnie. Karai's robots disarmed him and caught him in a firm grip. The turtles were forced onto the ground.

"So, what do you think of my legion?" Karai looked down at them with a faint smirk. After no reply, her soldiers bound the younger's hands and led them away.

At the Shredder's lair, the turtles soon found themselves in a cold, moldy cell. Michelangelo stepped to the entrance, tightening his hand around one of the bars like he could break it. Donnie was watching him from behind, thinking about possible escape plans.

"Well, this way it will be a little harder to take down the Shredder."

The next day, Karai visited the turtles. Michelangelo immediately stepped ahead, shielding Donnie from her smug smile.

"Where is Donatello?" he spat.

"He's busy. But don't worry, you will see him soon."

"What have you done to him?"

"I made a deal with him," she replied, while a soldier came forward with a key.

"Huh?"

As the cell's door opened, the other soldiers bound Donnie's hands again. They grabbed them by the arm and followed Karai.

They walked through a dark corridor until the very end, where a metal door ended their road. The soldiers pushed them inside, but they stayed outside.

"What the heck?" Michelangelo muttered as he looked around the room.

A lab.

But why were they left alone there?

Will they poison them?

No, food would be enough for that.

Then torture?

Footsteps.

The backdoor opened, and a figure entered. He slowly emerged from the shadow and looked at the turtles.

The suspect immediately left Michelangelo's face. He pressed his lips and his hard gaze softened. His eyes shined with unshed tears.

"Donatello..."

The years etched lines on his long-lost brother's face, but his familiar features remained unmistakable.

Michelangelo took uncertain steps towards him, extending his trembling hand, fingers reaching out to touch the brother he'd thought he'd lost forever.

"Mikey," Donatello's smile was warm and welcoming.

Michelangelo jumped at his brother and hugged him strongly... very strongly until Donatello had trouble breathing. Mikey quickly let him go and as he watched his brother take a breath, he remembered how things had become the way they did.

"You!" he raised his voice, startling both Donatellos. "Where the shell have you been??"

"Um, it's kind of complicated," he rubbed his nape.

"Have you been here?? Working for the Shredder?!"

"No!" he put his hands up in defense.

"Then?"

"Mikey... before I tell you about my past 30 years, you have to know something," then he looked at his counterpart. "You both should know it."

"What?"

Donatello took a deep breath and furrowed his brow ridges. His gaze's focus was changing uneasily, and his face showed helplessness.

"...I'm not the one you're looking for."

Now

"Sit down, little Leo," Michelangelo offered a chair in the lab. Leo slowly sat down and looked around.

"So... someone will examine me, right?" Leo asked shyly.

"Yes. He will be here soon."

"Who's the doc here?"

Michelangelo didn't answer right away. He stepped next to the boy and squeezed his shoulder.

"Soon, you will understand me."

The door cracked open on the other side of the room and a shady figure came out. As the light hit the stranger, icy shots rushed through Leo's body. It wasn't a stranger.

"You... Donatello?"

"Yes. And you are Leonardo's son, aren't you?"

Leo looked at Michelangelo, whose dark glare was glued to the doctor.

"Umm... yeah."

This felt like the safest answer at that moment.

"Incredible. How were you created?"

"You don't ask such a thing from a child, Don," Mikey interrupted.

"Oh, right. I'm sorry for the wording. I'm just wondering how it was possible. I have some ideas, but all of them seem unlikely. Expect if there is really a female mutant turtle around. Or was."

Leo bit his lip. No way he could fool Donatello, so he should be honest. But on the other hand, he saw what Michelangelo was capable of, so he was afraid to tell the truth in front of him.

"Could we... talk in private?" he asked quietly.

"What?" the orange-clad turtle exclaimed. "Why?"

"Sure," Donatello said. "I also have something to tell you. Mikey already knows, so it would be better if we continued alone.”

"What? Oh, come on... why can't I stay?"

"Mikey, please, excuse us."

Michelangelo narrowed his eyes and clenched his fist but eventually walked out of the lab after some minutes.

"So, tell me, how did you get here?"

"To this lab?"

"No, to this world."

"...You knew it??"

"Of course. I mean, I wasn't 100% sure, only 92%."

Leo sighed. His anxiety eased and his thoughts became simpler.

"I don't remember much. But I dwelled on this a lot in the past 2 months, and it was probably a Kraang. They have the technology for this.”

"That's very possible," Donatello walked towards the metal door he exited earlier and showed Leo to follow him. "You are not the only one who came from a different world."

Leo stepped into the secret room after the older one. But he couldn't take the next step as his body froze noticing another person.

"Donatello... again?"

A much younger Donatello was sitting on a wooden chair, looking back at him with a warm smile.

"Hi," he waved.

Donatello pointed at his younger self.

"He got here because of Ultimate Drako."

"Who?" Leo raised a brow ridge.

Donatello frowned. "Another pain in our shell. Maybe they don't exist in your world. This Donnie's world is similar to mine and this. Based on my experiences, your world must belong to another part of the multiverse."

"I'm confused."

"I thought you would say that. The point is that you are not alone in this problem, and we may be able to help you to go home."

"Really?" Leo's eyes lit up.

"We're hoping to," Donnie added. "I want to go home too."

Leo looked at him. "I feel a little better that I found a fellow sufferer. Now it's the two of us."

"Three of us, actually."

"What??"

"As I mentioned, my counterpart's world is similar to this and mine, therefore mine is not this."

"So, you're not this world's Donnie?"

"No, I'm not."

"Okay, now I'm even more confused."

"Let me explain."

Chapter Text

19

"Self-deception can be more comforting than self-knowledge.

We like to fool ourselves."

-   Russ Roberts -

"Let me explain," Don held up his hands both for defense and attention. "You probably know about that horrible night, when the Shredder found our lair..."

"No, not really..." Leo rubbed his nape.

"Didn't Leo tell you about it?"

"No. I tried to make him talk, but he said that his past was none of my business."

"Hmm... so he doesn't know that you are him, correct?"

"Yeah..."

"Why didn't you tell him?"

"Well... I... I don't know," he lowered his gaze and started to draw circles on the floor with his toes. "I needed time to process things... and then, things happened and... and... I guess I was scared to say it out and face his reaction..."

"You hoped that if you don't talk about it, then it stops being a fact?"

Leo didn't bother to look up. He screwed up. He knew. He should have told his counterpart. He should have told everyone. Maybe then he wouldn't have been kidnapped.

Donatello sighed.

"Alright, I will tell you then."

30 years ago

Donatello growled as he looked at the smoky toaster.

"How many times do I have to fix you?" the young turtle rubbed his temples and thought about a certain brother who just couldn't get along with this machine. However, it amazed Don that this little thing was still working and could survive so many assassin attempts. "Don't worry, I will look for a new toaster, so you can retire."

But then, a screeching voice hit his ear.

He ran out of the kitchen, finding his brothers in the living room, all tense but ready to face whatever made the alarm go off. Leonardo stepped forward, clenching his fists on his katanas' hilts.

The alarm went silent, and the turtles listened.

Intermittent drips of water filled the room. At that moment, that punctured pipe was so loud and annoying like during the nights when he couldn't sleep.

Splinter slowly left the dojo to join his sons. He never took his narrowed eyes off the entrance. Leo looked just as determined as him. Donnie knew that they felt something that the rest of them couldn't. They knew what was about to happen.

"It's the Shredder," Splinter said.

"What? How did he find us?" Mikey exclaimed.

"He's not alone. He bought a whole army," Leo added, ignoring his brothers' confusion. He focused only on the enemy now.

"Time to kick some ass," Raph formed an x with his sais.

"I feel like it won't be as easy as on the rooftops, against a small team," Donnie said.

"Especially if the Elite ninjas are also here," Mikey swung his nunchuck and joined his brother in the front line.

"They are here," Leo breathed. "Just a few more steps."

The stench of the sewers was overwhelming. The dim, flickering light from the overhead bulbs cast long shadows across the walls, creating an eerie atmosphere. Their home, once a safe home, was not a battlefield.

Leonardo stepped ahead, his katanas glinting in the sparse light. Beside him, Donatello twirled his bo staff, Mikey spun his nunchakus, and Raph clutched his sais with fierce determination. Splinter stood behind them, his walking stick in hand, ready to defend his family.

And they listened. Listened as their demise was approaching.

And they broke in! The Foot Clan descended upon them like a swarm. Shredder led the charge, his armor gleaming menacingly. Karai was at his side, her eyes cold and calculating. Donatello never liked her.

Elite ninjas flanked them, their weapons poised to strike.

"Stay together!" Leonardo commanded, his voice steady despite the chaos erupting around them.

However, Raph leaped forward and rushed to the enemy. His sais were deflecting a barrage of attacks. He moved with the ferocity of a cornered beast, each strike precise and deadly. But not against the relentless Elite ninjas.

Donatello joined his brother and watched his shell by knocking out several foot soldiers. At the corner of his eye, he saw as Mikey and Leo also teamed up to even out the match. They took down several foes, however, a sudden scream distracted them all.

Turning around they saw Raphael fell on the ground, pressing his right hand over his right eye. Blood was mercilessly flowing through his fingers to his whole body. Shredder towered upon him, his blood still on his gauntlet. He stood up trembling, he may have lost an eye but not his rage, he launched forwards just to see that Mikey and Leo were already spamming their enemy with restless attacks.

Splinter focused on distracting the other ninjas from his wounded son. Donatello quickly jumped next to his brother and tried to guide him to the lab, but his hotheaded brother just pushed him away.

"Don't," that's all he roared silently. Donatello frowned in concern as he looked at Raphael. He feared of the blood loss and even more about Raphael's chances in this fight this injured.

However, Raphael just grabbed his weapon and continued the fight, driven by pure adrenaline, fuming.

Michelangelo shrieked in pain and fell on his knees, clutching his bleeding arm... but taking a closer look, Donatello saw his arm was lying a few inches away, still strongly holding the nunchaku, but not attached to his brother's body anymore.

His eyes grew wild but he could only think of one thing: Mikey needed immediate medical attention! Donatello rushed to Mikey and scooped him up taking him away from the living room.

"You are going to pay for this!" he could hear their leader's cry and the blades collided.

In the lab, Donnie locked the door and quickly pressed a white cloth to Mikey's stump. He screamed in agony.

"It's okay, it's okay, you will be fine, Mikey, you will be fine. I'm going to make a new arm for you that will be so much better than the original!" Donnie rambled, hoping to keep the soul in his brother but mostly in himself. His fingers were shaking as he reached for other tools.

He quickly put a tourniquet above the stump and right after he started to clean out the wound as much as he could.

There was no time to properly treat this serious injury. He strongly wrapped it around with gauze. He looked at his brother who seemed to be in and out of consciousness.

"FATHER! NO!"

Donnie’s heart stopped for a moment as he unlocked the doors and dashed out of the lab. In the middle of the room lay his father with an ugly wound on his chest, motionless. On top of him, Leonardo wept blood, clutching onto his father's robe, not caring about those deep slashes all over his body, one nasty one exactly across his eyes, tearing his mask off of his face.

Next to them stood Karai, blood dripping down from her katana. Her brows slightly knitted, her eyes teary as she watched her opponent laying in their own blood. She clenched the hilt of her sword as she spoke to her remaining soldiers.

"Catch Donatello. Kill the rest."

She raised her katana to finish Leonardo, but it was blocked by Raphael.

"Start with me," he growled. He stabbed her with his other sai. Karai gasped and stepped behind. She hissed as she pressed her hand on the wound. Raphael yelled towards Donatello.

"Take him out of here!"

Donatello nodded and quickly picked Leonardo up in his arms and ran, ran as fast as he could.

Some soldiers followed them, but Donatello had the advantage of knowing the sewers like the back of his hand. He knew about a secret tunnel, that was not even on the official blueprints and carried his bleeding brother there. He gently lowered him to the bottom and carefully touched his face. Leonardo winced at the contact but showed no resistance.

Donatello didn't need a second look to see; the slash was too deep, his brother was certainly blind. A tear rolled down his face, but now he had no time to cry over his brothers' losses. He had to return to help Raphael!

The water splashed until the ceiling as Donatello sprinted through the tunnels towards his home. His family.

Run straight, now left, and then right, straight again, next one right-

Four Elite ninjas stood in the way. He turned back but from the left tunnel another group of soldiers marched at him. He grabbed his bo staff and lunged at them, fought with every power that remained in his exhausted body. His mind could only focus on one thing: he had to protect his family! At any cost..

He couldn't let them get to Leo and he had to return to the lair.

Cutss and hits were not registered, only his growing worry.

Until a strong slash awakened him from his thoughts.

His staff broke apart on the sewer wall. His hand was still in the air, blood running down from his fingertips.

Cold steels were pressed against his neck.

"Do you wish to kill your brothers, turtle?" Shredder's deep voice was hurting his ears.

"...no" he whimpered.

"Then I advise you to follow me, then I spare the other three."

"How could I believe you?"

"I will get what I want either way. I gave you a choice, the rest depends on you."

"Why would you spare my brothers if you can get me either way?"

"Let's say... for motivation. If I kill them you’d be harder to handle. You have to know what depends on your work."

Two strong soldiers gripped Donatello as the Shredder turned around.

"Do you wish to protect your brothers? You can do that by working for me."

Donatello lost his strength and would have fallen to the ground if the soldiers hadn't kept him up. He didn't know anything. Were Mikey and Raph safe? Did the Shredder really spare them? He will have to find out. But until then he had to focus on one certain fact; Leonardo was still alive. He had to protect him! And he could only hope that April and Casey find him in time.

Chapter Text

20

"Who are we beyond the roles that we play?"

- Joan Anderson -

Donatello was lying in his cell, facing the wall. The soldiers' footsteps were barely audible in his clouded mind. He didn't know how long he had been lying there. He didn't know what could have happened to his brothers. He didn't know what the Shredder planned to do with him. This uncertainty was creeping through his body, slowly choking him. He was the supposed "genius" among his brothers, he always did everything to have enough information about everything important. But right now, he knew nothing. An uncomfortable weight pressed his chest as he wondered about his breakout. If he cannot save himself with his brain, then how? He was already the weakest fighter in the team, how could he escape all alone?

He pulled his body into a ball. He had to find something out! His brothers needed him! He had to get out immediately and tend their wounds. All of them required serious attention. Raph lost an eye, Mikey an arm... and Leo? He feared the worst.

Hot teardrops wet the dirty floor.

His father... he was truly gone, wasn't he...?

Something knocked against the cell bars. Donatello tiredly sat up and turned his head towards the sound. From the corner of his eyes, he quickly recognized his guest.

He sighed and turned back towards the wall.

"That's it? No questions?" Karai raised an eyebrow as she watched the turtle.

"Without answers what do questions worth?"

"Interesting take," she tilted her head slightly. "You don't seem too cooperative. Perhaps seeing your brothers' corpses would change your mind."

Donatello jumped to the bars, ready to grab her, but Karai leaped back in time.

"What did you do to them? Did you kill them?!"

"I thought questions were not worth your time."

"What happened to them?"

"They are alive - for now. And if you will be good, then it remains like that."

"What do you want from me?" he growled.

"Your knowledge. Master Shredder wants you to work with Stockman. In the first round, you will design his new suit. It must be stronger than anything created before. Obviously, you will have other projects, too. If you succeed, your brothers will live."

"How could I believe you?"

"Your choice. However, if you reject, I go back to that filthy hole to bring their heads here."

Donatello shivered at the thought. His forehead heavily wrinkled as his fingers tightened around the bars.

He had no choice—he had to trust Karai. Perhaps his brothers will be able to recover and hide somewhere else until he's working.

But why would the Shredder let such an opportunity be wasted? He could eliminate his biggest enemies once and for all. Why would he spare them? What kind of development work will he have to do that this deal is worth to the Shredder?

"...Fine."

"Good choice. You will be soon escorted to the lab."

In the next hour, some soldiers led him to Stockman's lab. That place was a mess! Papers and vials were everywhere. And in the middle of the mess, there was Baxter Stockman.

"Well, well, well, Donatello," he smirked as he walked closer to the turtle. "Congratulations on becoming my assistant! Let's get to work immediately, we've got a lot to do!"

"I was told designing a suit is the first on the list. What else is on the Shredder's mind?"

"Oh, he has a lot of orders for a huge plan. How could I summarize? Hmm... world domination?"

"What? This plan sounds ridiculous, even for him!"

"I don't think so. He can do it, and he will. Our job is to prevent every possible scenario that could step into his way."

"With a suit?"

"The exo-suit will be an extra strong fighting suit. Earthly weapons won't be a challenge to it. But it's quite a difficult thing to do, so I need you to do the tedious things during the development. I will do the thinking obviously."

Donatello narrowed his eyes.

World domination? Sounds like a cartoon villain's plan.

However, when he thought about the Utroms it didn't seem so impossible anymore. Especially if he and Stockman keep working on newer and newer weapons...

Can he really participate in it? What if with his help the Shredder will actually take over the world? What the Earth would become? What the human society would become?

What would happen to his brothers? Could they even live in such a world?

Would his brothers ever forgive him for letting the world fall just to save them?

Could he stop the Shredder from this current position, or this doom was already settled whether he joined or not?

"Hold this," Stockman pressed an iron part into his hands, then turned back to his desk to scrabble on his papers.

He sighed broken.

Donatello could not tell how much time had passed since he started working with Stockman. The suit was close to finding its final form after many, many redesigning, testing, and sleepless nights.

Donatello's life was reduced to only two components: working in the lab, if not then he was worrying about his brothers.

By that time, he felt like he had become a master of Utrom technology, with each day he had learned more and more, realizing how much power the Shredder actually had.

He was scared. Terrified.

And yet, numb.

Uncertainty was driving him crazy.

"Wonderful!" Stockman exclaimed. Donatello turned his head towards him, lifting his glassy eyes on him. "I believe this last modification will be the key to perfection! My position will be secured!"

Donatello just rolled his eyes. He couldn't understand how he could serve the Shredder so assiduously.

They finished the final version of the exo-suit in the following months. As soon as it was ready, the Shredder tried it out.

"Excellent," he commented with a satisfied expression on his face.

"I'm glad it is to your liking, Master," Stockman smiled.

Donatello silently watched the scene.

"Ah, turtle," the Shredder turned towards Donatello. "In the years, you worked on several projects, including the several redesigns of my suit. Do you know what your brothers were doing in the meantime?"

Donatello looked at him puzzled.

"They collected new little friends to work against me. Little do they know that I know about every step they make, thanks to my excellent spy. They don't even know who they give the information to. What can I say? They are mere animals, obviously they are stupid," he stared into Donnie's eyes. "They are planning to rescue you."

Donnie's eyes widened and stepped back to keep his balance.

"It can be any day now. Even today. They are your so-called brothers, so let me tell you. Once they enter my mansion, they cannot leave. Not alive."

Donatello fell on his knees and started begging without hesitation.

"Please, spare my brothers. I can talk to them! If you let me go, I will make sure that none of them comes here!"

It hurt every part of his pride, but he would do anything for his family. And he knew it very well what the Shredder was capable of. His brothers were no match for him, even if they found some new allies. But apparently, not all of them are allies...

The Shredder laughed. He laughed so hard that he almost fell over in his exo-suit.

"What a wonderful view! What a shame that I cannot help you," he shook his head.

"Wait, wait! I can stay then and help Stockman create anything you want! I will... I will just send a message and then-"

"Turtle." he cut him off. "Do you perhaps not know your own brothers? They will not stop until they are dead. They are too proud, too angry, and stupid. They cannot analyze the situation the same way as you can."

Donnie pressed his forehead against the floor. "Please..."

"...Fine. It seems like you have to see it with your own eyes," he smirked. "I let you send a letter to your brothers."

Donnie sighed in relief and sat up. "Thank you..."

The Shredder waved to a soldier who immediately brought a piece of paper and a pen.

"Be quick."

Donatello took the pen into his hand and started writing.

Dear Leo, Raph, Mikey, April, and Casey!

You probably found out where I am and wish to rescue me. I'm begging you guys not to do it! I have been here for years now, and I know your chances are close to 0. Please, listen to me and don't come here! I am fine. I am not tortured, I just need to work in the lab, so don't worry about me! I need you guys to live, and if you come here then you won't make it, so please! Move on and survive. If not for me, then for father.

Donatello

He could barely finish his own name when the soldier grabbed the letter.

"Take it to the turtles' assumed area. Do not attack them. Our friend needs to see that his brothers will come here either way, they don't need further provocation."

The soldier nodded and left the room.

After that, Donatello and Stockman were also sent back to the lab.

It was late so they went to bed. However, Donatello couldn't get any sleep through the night. He couldn't stop thinking about his brothers and worrying that they wouldn't listen to him and get themselves killed here. He was also worried what if the Shredder was just playing with him and not actually delivering the letter?

A few days had passed since Donatello wrote the letter. No response yet.

And he was glad.

He hoped that his brothers listened to him and stayed hidden.

With Stockman, he was working on an older project, the Karai Legion. Deadly robots that looked like Karai with different weapons.

They had made three ready ones that were already tested by Karai.

They had been making last fixes on them when the alarm went off.

Donatello jerked his head up and looked at Stockman who was just as clueless as he was.

Then, it got him...

His brothers...

"Oh no," he sighed as he dropped the screwdriver.

He jumped up from his seat and rushed to the door, but it was locked. He was violently shaking the handle when Stockman pushed him away.

"You cannot leave without the Master's permission."

"I need to warn-"

"Your brothers? You already warned them. They didn't listen! Why would they listen now?"

"No, no, no! I need to get out! I must try! Open the door!" Donatello frantically tried to get out of the lab. He grabbed Stockman by the collar and continued hysterically. "Stockman! Open the door right now or I don't even know what I'm going to do to you! But it won't be good, I swear!"

"Let go of me!" Stockman was trying to tear his attacker's hands off of him but with no luck.

Donatello was blinded by fury and worry unable to sense the dangers around him until he felt a sharp pain in his outer thigh. Looking down he noticed that Stockman stuck a syringe into him.

"I was ordered to keep you here. I couldn't risk you ruining my performance index."

Donatello barely heard these words as his world began to spin around him until it became completely dark.

When Donatello came back to the living world, his eyes opened painfully. The lights, the smell, and even the air hurt his body. His arms were tied behind his shell. He coughed a few before he heard Stockman again.

"You can meet your brothers now."

Stockman pulled him up from the floor and led him out of the lab. Donatello had trouble staying on his feet, but the thought of his brothers gave him strength. Finally, he can see them! Oh, how much he missed them! He could warn his brothers and protect them!

Stockman dragged him through many corridors and corners until they reached the throne room.

As the doors opened, a horrible sight greeted him.

His brothers were covered with several long and deep cuts, lying on the ground, unmoving, while blood was slowly increasing around them. The three Karai Legion, that he had upgraded, were standing above Mikey, his blood shining on their thick armors.

Leo's black glasses broke, exposing his closed, heavily injured eyes. He had a hole in his chest, his plastron cracked around it. Someone stabbed him...

Raphael was lying on top of Leonardo, one eye missing, the other lifelessly staring into the void. His left hand still strongly grasped onto his brother's hand, close to the stab wound.

Karai and the Shredder were standing next to them, their blades dripping blood.

Stockman cut the rope around Donatello's wrists, and he immediately fell to the ground.

Donatello didn’t register the Shredder's words, his body shivered as he was kneeling next to Raphael. He was trembling. He reached out to his brothers, and where they held onto each other's hand, Donatello too placed his hand. They were still warm. It felt melting against his cold fingers.

His breath hitched between his heavy breath. His eyes filled up with hot tears, completely blurring his vision. His ears were ringing, and his mind was desperately trying to tear away from reality.

Then, he got kicked away from his brothers.

"Are you deaf?" a foot soldier asked. "You were ordered."

Donatello blinked away his tears and lifted his head up to look at the soldiers, then slowly his gaze wandered to Karai.

"Leave," she said, probably for the umpteenth time by now. Her voice was weak. Her eyebrows bent and her eyes shined in a strange light. Donatello couldn't understand this expression. She didn't seem like someone who just eliminated her enemies...

"My...my brothers..." Donnie cracked.

"You can take them with you. Your other friends’ as well, " she replied, then turned around and walked towards the door. At the doorstep, she slightly turned back to take another look at the turtles, then disappeared from the room.

Other friends? So, April and Casey too…? And probably even more friends.

The soldiers followed their boss and left the crime scene. Now it was only Donatello and his brothers.

And then, the hysterical crying broke out of him. He was screaming unintelligibly, his tears were flowing down in a thick line, burning his freezing skin. He hovered over his brothers, trying to hug them. He gripped them strongly, not caring how bloody he became.

And he just cried and cried and cried...

Donatello buried his brothers and friends in the same park where his father was resting. Master Splinter really liked this park since his owner, Hamato Yoshi used to bring there a lot.

He only dared to hope that now they have peace together.

He just lost everyone. Now, he had no one.

He knew that for him there wouldn't be a funeral, he would just rot wherever he would drop dead.

Why not choose a place for that himself then?

He had no purpose in this world anymore.

He lost his family, and the Shredder already took over most of the world.

He had no chance of facing him alone. He could just witness how strong he actually was.

Therefore, his life lost its meaning.

He went back to the old lair. It was as messy as it was left when the Shredder ambushed them. His father died here, and the spot can be still recognized. His brothers managed to flee but they had to leave their home behind for good. No one lived here in ages, but Donatello didn't care. This was his home.

And this place will be his tomb.

He walked into the dojo, took a katana, and kneeled down at the center.

A memory resurfaced in his mind.

Once he was talking about the afterlife with Leonardo. Leonardo liked to believe that death is not the end. He believed in the afterlife, whether it was heaven or reincarnation or some kind of other ghost world, he believed that life doesn’t disappear, just changes.

Donatello on the other hand was more practical, more rational. He knew that Splinter and Leo liked this spiritual stuff, but he himself wasn't too sure if he could believe in all of them. He told Leo that once all the receptors and neurons stop working in the brain, then it's death, the end.

Leo then challenged him for a bet. He said that “we will see who's right”. Donnie thought it to be stupid. After all, if he's right then how could Leo pay him? But he still agreed to it.

He hoped he wouldn't have to find out about the truth this early, but he could not continue living in this world.

So, for once, he hoped that he was wrong. He hoped that Leo was right, and they would reunite soon and then he would do whatever Leo wanted as a reward.

He positioned the blade against his stomach and took a deep breath.

He looked around in the dojo for the last time.

He sighed.

So, this is the end.

He closed his eyes and firmed his hands on the hilt.

And then, a big thump and a loud yell filled the lair. Donatello dropped the sword and rushed out of the dojo to the living room.

"Ah, I can't believe this, I ruined it again!"

Donatello's eyes grew wild as he watched a familiar woman collecting herself from the ground.

"Renet?"