Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Chase POV

‘I am not good at love. That’s for sure. First Sabrine, but well, that wasn’t my fault. Then Sebastian, god, that one really hurt. And now? Reese. Maybe Bree and Adam were right all along, maybe no one would ever like me. Maybe I am weird. Maybe I am meant to be alone.’ 

For being the “smartest man alive” or whatever title I was given to prove Douglas genius for inventing me, I could be pretty dumb. I had trusted Reese, I had taken Reese to the penthouse. Douglas being in the hospital was my fault. All those heroes having to be relocated and being in danger was my fault. Because I had been dumb enough to think I was lovable, to think Reese loved me. 

At that moment, everyone was at the hospital with Douglas, even Leo, Adam and Mr Davenport had gone to see him. But I was in the building. I just couldn’t stand to see the disappointment in his face, or in Bree’s, Mr. Davenport’s, well in everyone’s faces. Because I knew they would be disappointed. I was disappointed in myself. I hadn't lived up to my title, or surname. So I was alone at the penthouse sitting down on the floor in Mission Command, trying to shape my thoughts into something coherent. I didn't want anyone to see me when they got back, I didn’t want to see them. Before I could realize I was crying, I didn’t usually cry, being able to push down my intrusive thoughts. But that time it was too much, my head full of “what ifs” and “logical” reasons of why I was a horrible, useless person.

‘You don’t contribute anything to the team. Skylar is a better leader. Any computer can do what you do.  You should do better, and if you can’t, you should leave. You are a burden right now, useless.’ Those thoughts appeared in my mind against my will. I tried concentrating on my breathing, but that only made me start hyperventilating. I tried to think of any way of making the thoughts go away, but I couldn’t think of anything other than drowning myself in work. And at that moment I couldn’t make myself stand up and turn the computer on. But then, an old memory flashed into my head. 

Flashback

I was 7 years old, Adam had been teasing me and calling me weak all day long, as he usually did. And I felt weak, my abilities didn’t help me win any of the games my siblings wanted to play. But I was okay with it, I was smarter than them, or that’s what I told myself. But in reality, I was tired of being left aside. I sat in front of Mr. Davenport’s computer and started looking for things on the internet, ways of stopping Adam’s teasing, or at least the bad voices in my head. Or really anything that could help me. Somehow I ended up finding that physical pain reduced psychological pain and cleared the mind. I knew I didn't need it, or at least thought so, but I was really curious about how it felt. I found a swiss knife in my dad’s stuff and put it against my arm’s skin. I looked around trying to see if Adam and Bree were paying attention to me, but of course they weren’t. They were playing some rough game that I couldn’t play, as always. I cut myself, just a small cut on my wrist, and looked at the injury, trying to understand why it felt relieving and why people did it. But I didn’t quite get it, so I was going to try again, for science. But at that moment Mr Davenport entered the lab and took the knife out of my hands. He scolded me about testing stuff I found on the internet and not taking care of myself. He cleaned the wound and put a bandage on top of it. He didn’t say he was worried, but he did give me a goodnight hug that day. 

End of flashback

Remembering the feeling, and really wanting to be able to get something, anything, done, I took out my swiss knife from my pocket. It had been a gift from Leo. ‘What would he say if he knew I used it for this?’ I thought, in a moment of clarity, but the intrusive thoughts won once more: ‘he would be glad, you kind of deserve it. A punishment, a reminder, to not mess up again.’ I slid the knife against the skin of my wrist once, twice. The pain cleared my mind enough for me to be able to start breathing properly and stand up. I grabbed some bandages from the first aid kit and put them on, I wasn’t going to let it infect and be a problem. ‘Okay, now I need to find Reese, Roman and Riker, I need to make things right’. I turned on the console and got to work, but every lead I had, took me to a dead-end. I lost track of time, but thought it would be better to take a rest. I just hoped everyone was back and already in bed, so I wouldn’t need to see them. I should have known I wasn’t that lucky. I went to the penthouse and when the hydrolift door opened, everyone was in the living room. I hung my head in shame and was going to go back to MC, but Adam talked

“Oh Chasey, I thought you were more intelligent, being the smartest man in the world and all that, but, being fooled a second time? When will you understand no girl or boy will ever like you” he said mockingly and laughed softly. But for once, I didn’t answer him, or told him to stop, or rolled my eyes. I just stayed still, looking at the floor, defeated.

“You are right. I should have known. You and Bree were always right, I’m unlovable and nobody will ever like me. I am sorry it took two betrayals and attacks for me to realize” I looked at Douglas, well, in his direction, I couldn’t get myself to look him in the eyes “I am sorry” I told the hydrolift to take me back to the MC. 

I wanted to lay on the floor and cry. I wanted to cut again in an attempt to make the pain go away. But both options felt too selfish. I had made a mistake and I needed to make it right. I needed to find them

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Bree POV

Something wasn’t right. It wasn’t like Chase to tell us we were right, or to just take on Adam’s teasing. My gaze stayed in the hydrolift until Mr Davenport talked.

“That was totally unnecessary Adam” Mr. Davenport told him 

“But it was a joke, we always lighten the mood teasing him” he defended himself, but I could tell he felt uneasy. He knew Chase as well as I did. 

“But it wasn’t the time for a joke! I will go talk to him” I said walking to the hydrolift, but Douglas stopped me 

“I think Chase needs to be alone and forgive himself first”

I wasn’t so sure, but Skylar grabbed my hand, so I stayed

“Okay, I hope you are right” I leaned on my girlfriend

“Wait, Adam said this was the second time, what happened the first time?” Kaz asked

“If you don’t mind telling us” Oliver added.

I looked at Adam and Leo, who nodded softly. I sighed and explained Sebastian’s story.

“He never really said it, but I’m pretty sure Chase fell in love with him. He betrayed him, betrayed and attacked all us, even tried to kill Mr. Davenport. So yeah, it was rough for Chase” I finished. 

“I didn’t know he was into guys,” Oliver said, Kaz hit him softly in the arm.

“Really? That’s what you care about?”

I couldn’t help but smile and nod.

“He is Bi, the three of us are, I don’t know if it is a coincidence or consequence. He just never says it because he thinks it’s not important”

“Okay everyone, you can talk about sexuality and crushes tomorrow” Oliver wanted to argue but Douglas continued talking “I think we should all get some rest, specially me” 

I watched as everyone started walking away, but I just stayed looking at the hydrolift

“You coming Babe?” I heard Skylar ask me and I nodded as I walked to our room.

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Chase POV

I got down and started working at once. There needed to be a way of finding them. I started trying different methods, but eventually my tiredness won, and I fell asleep with my head on the console. 

I stayed awake all night trying to locate Roman, Riker and Reese. But I was really tired and fell asleep without even realizing. I only woke up when I heard Mr Davenport talking. 

“Chase? Did you sleep here?” I slowly opened my eyes

“I didn’t realize, sorry, I was trying to locate Reese, Romand and Riker” I murmured while sitting up straight

“You don’t look good, how much sleep did you get?” he asked sounding… worried? But it couldn’t be, I was just doing what I was supposed to.

“Well, last time I checked the clock while working it was 6 o’clock, and now it’s 8, so I guess two hours, one and a half maybe” I answered looking at the screen, I didn’t want to make eye contact with him, didn’t want to see the disappointment in Big D’s eyes

“But Chase! That’s too…”
“Much, yeah, I know, I should have been working” I interrupted 

“Little” he said without skipping a beat “You should sleep more.” Any other day I would have probably detected the worry in his voice, I had gotten pretty good at listening to subtones, but emotions really messed up my logic. 

‘So I have less time to screw up’ I thought 

“Breakfast is almost ready, don’t lose it” he said while heading to the Hidroloop. I didn’t have any intention of going to breakfast, or lunch, or any meal, I knew a human could go up to three weeks without eating, and it had only been a day. So I stayed at MC working. My plan was to stay there the whole day, or until I found our three enemies, but things don’t always go as planned. It was the early afternoon when I couldn’t stand it anymore. All I could think of were all my defects and things I did wrong. My head hurt and I felt dizzy, probably from the lack of sleep and food. I just couldn’t concentrate on my work. My mind started to wander and my breath got uneven. I felt my legs failing me, so I sat on the floor, covering my ears with my hands, in an attempt to shut the voices down. Everything felt like too much, the noises the console made, the lights, the texture of my clothes. I grabbed my swiss knife, the cold metal bringing me some kind of relief. I was about to cut when someone entered Mission Command. I quickly put away my knife in my pocket and stood up, leaning onto the desk so I wouldn’t fall, trying to look okay. 

“Chase” when I heard his voice I immediately looked at the screen and tried to work again, I at least owed him that. But I just couldn’t concentrate, it was already difficult enough only with my mind, but at that moment I also had a physical reminder of my mistakes 

“Yes?” I said, trying to stop my voice from breaking

“You didn’t come up to have breakfast or lunch, and I know you didn’t eat anything here. we are worried” Douglas stood between me and the screen so that I would have to look him in the eyes. To my surprise there wasn’t any disappointment in them, but that at that moment my “logic” told me my senses had just become faulty. My head still told me how useless I was.

“I was trying to find Riker, Roman and Reese” I murmured

“But you need to sleep and eat Chase. You know you need to actually stay alive to find them” 

“I need to repair my mistake. Mistake that got you into the hospital!” I said, a little louder than I wanted. I was using all of my willpower to not cry. I wouldn’t cry, I wouldn’t let him see me crying. 

“Chase…” my dad/uncle started, but it was quickly cut off by a video message

“Hey Chase, sorry to tell you this in a video message, but we couldn’t get ourselves to tell you face to face” I heard Bree’s voice and quickly walked around the desk, so I could stand in front of Douglas and see the screen. The video showed Kaz, Oliver and Bree in the street, all with smoothies in their hands

“We want you to quit the Elite Force” Kaz continued. 

I was devastated. I expected it, I knew I didn’t contribute anything to the team, and I had tried to prepare myself for that moment. But it still hurt like shit to hear it from my teammates, from my friends.  

“It’s about you being kind of useless and even a burden. We know you understand” hearing Oliver said that hurt the most. Mostly because, even though I wouldn’t even confess it to myself, I did have a crush on him. Not like it mattered, not like he would really like me back. 

I could feel the tears forming in my eyes and I turned around, giving my back to the screen, I couldn’t look at them anymore. I grabbed the border of the console, my knuckles turning white. I closed my eyes in an attempt to stop the tears.

“I need to work, I will go up for dinner” I lied, my head hanging, my eyes still closed, trying really hard not to break at that moment.  

Chapter Text

Chase Pov

‘They are right. You deserve this. They all have superpowers. They don’t need you’ My head started telling me ‘You deserve to be alone.’

“Those are not them” It’s all Douglas answered

“What?” I managed to ask in a whisper, opening my eyes.

“They are upstairs” He said like it was obvious, like I should know, like he didn’t understand why he needed to explain it. 

“They could have gone out!! You know that what they say it’s true!!” I shouted, my voice breaking into a sob at the end of that sentence. I took a deep breath before continuing. “I will quit. But I won’t stop searching.” I murmured and quickly dried the tears that had fallen from my eyes against my will. “I am sorry you had to see me like that and I am sorry about Reese” I told him, trying to look ok. 

I thought he would leave, shout at me, maybe, just maybe, forgive me. But he did the last thing I expected, he hugged me. I didn’t complain

“Geez Chase, it’s ok, I had a crush on a supervillain too, almost making you get killed. For goodness sake, I was a villain myself” He stepped backwards, his hands on my shoulders “I would forgive you, but there isn’t really anything to forgive, you messed up, it happens. I’m fine and the heroes are relocated. It was probably just karma on my side.” He lowered his face so I would look him in the eyes. “And you are not useless, and the team needs you, ok?” I nodded, not convinced at all. “Those aren’t Bree, Oliver and Kaz, they are upstairs and wearing different clothes. You will come to the penthouse and see it yourself” it was an order, so I nodded and followed him into the hydrolift.

When the doors opened again I looked at my family. Douglas was right, my team had different clothes than the ones in the video. They were all in the living room, including Skylar and my brothers. Some game forgotten on the table. I took a deep breath and passed my hand through my hair, quite relieved that my friends didn’t tell me to leave the team. Not yet at least. But also really scared that our enemies knew enough about me to make that video, to know I would believe it. 

“Look who came! Chasey!” Adam said but I ignored him

“Roman, Riker and Reese are close. They sent a video from two blocks from here. They are probably gone by now, but at least we know they are near. Could you warn the heroes?” I asked walking out of the Hydrolift

Bree looked at me with a worried expression, but I didn’t pay attention, walking past her. 

“Yeah, most of them at least, some weren’t at home. The ones who we warned are already relocated and hopefully they won’t be found” Skylar said, confusion in her face. I could see the same feeling in the other one’s faces.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” I said, lying against the kitchen counter. 

“Well, you were in Mission Command all night and all day, and when you finally come out you just talk about missions” my sister explained to me, why had she said it like it was a bad thing?

“What else should I talk about? Those shapeshifters are out there and we need to stop them before they hurt another person!” I said quite startled, I looked at the game on the table. ‘How can they be playing with so many things at risk?’ But I realized I was jealous, I wanted to be fine, at least enough to be able to play games with my friends without feeling guilty. I bit my lip and looked somewhere else.

“First we need to rest, find them and come out with a plan.” Bree said calmly while walking towards me. She walked slowly, something weird in her, like she was approaching a wounded animal. I probably looked like one. 

“How can you all be so calm? Every superhero out there is in danger! And we are supposed to save them” I murmured, when I said it that way it sounded impossible. 

“We are calm because we can’t do anything right now, and running out without a plan will only backfire, you taught us that” 

“But we can do something! We can continue looking! That’s what I’ve been doing” I walked to the hydrolift but Mr. Davenport blocked my way “Come on Big D, I need to find them” I said looking around, trying to find someone to back me up, but I knew they wouldn’t. I felt trapped, my breathing started to become irregular. I felt like a wounded animal. 

“What you need to do is eat something and rest” he answered

“But…”

“No buts, now go”

I walked past the kitchen on the way to my room and grabbed a piece of bread. I didn’t look at anyone, couldn’t get myself to do it. I entered my shared bedroom, but didn’t want to sleep, so I sat on Oliver’s bed and took out my tablet.

‘If I can’t find them, maybe I can find a way to isolate the shapeshifting cells’ I thought while eating the bread. A bit of the dizziness went away, maybe I did need to eat.

“What is happening to Chase? He usually isn’t so impulsive” I heard Oliver say from the kitchen. Right, superhearing. I sighed and stood up to grab my noise cancelling headphones, I really didn’t want to hear them talking about me. 

‘Great, now you made them worry. Don’t you think they have more important things to worry about? You should be fine. If you aren’t, you are a burden’

I sat down again and started working.

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Oliver POV

“What is happening to Chase? He usually isn’t so impulsive” I asked, quite worried about my new best friend. Well, and crush, but friend is the most important part. I didn’t like seeing him like that, so… lost.

“He blames himself” I heard Leo say “This isn’t the first time, he is used to carrying all the blame, but we never get him to talk. And some teasing” he said glaring at Adam “Doesn’t help” He was clearly worried for his older brother
“I already said I was sorry” the older bionic said raising his hands

“Maybe you should say it to Chase” Adam looked like he hadn’t considered it but knew it was true.

“Douglas, what did the video say?” Kaz asked, changing subject, or so we thought

“It will be better if I just show you” Douglas reproduced the video in the TV

I couldn’t believe Reese, Riker and Roman had gone so low, well, actually I could, but it made me hate them even more to see them play the psychological game.

“That’s useless, Chase would never believe that” I said, more trying to convince myself than the others, I wanted to believe Chase knew his value. “Right?” 

“He did, every single word of it. I convinced him to come see you” the former villain said, clearly worried.

“I will go talk to him” Bree said but I stood up

“May i? Please” she seemed hesitant, but she finally nodded and I started walking to our room. Cursing those shapeshifters for making Chase believe that, cursing myself for not showing Chase how much he meant to me. How much I liked him… 

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Chase POV

I was so concentrated in my work, that I didn’t see Oliver entering the room. And of course I didn’t hear him either. So I got startled when he touched my shoulder.

“Oh, hi Oliver, do you want your bed? I will sit on Kaz’s” I quickly said, starting to stand up, but he just sat next to me.

“We need to talk” 

I gulped, afraid of what he could tell me. A million ideas passed through my head. But one thing was clear: I didn’t want to hear my crush say any of them, so I said it first:

“You want me out of the team, right?” 

“What? No!” Oliver quickly answered and sighed “Sorry, that probably wasn’t the best way to start the conversation.” I couldn’t help but sigh in relief.

“Oh, alright, that’s a relieve. What do you want to talk about?” 

“Douglas showed us the video, and told us you believed it, and just now you said it. Why do you think that?” He put a hand on my knee, looking at me with worried eyes. My heart jumped in my chest

‘I like you, don’t leave me’ I thought against my will. Emotions were difficult enough, but crushes? And Oliver’s eyes?  

“It’s just strategical” I said like it was nothing, but I looked away “A team is as strong as its weakest member. So the most reasonable thing to do would be get rid of the weakest member, aka me, so you would be stronger. You all have superpowers, a computer can do the same thing I do. It makes sense, ” I shrugged “Having said that I will go to sleep.” I stood up, not wanting to talk more about that. I didn’t want him to see me as weak. Oliver grabbed my arm. I didn’t look at him, saying all that stuff outloud made it sound more real. 

“If that saying was true and you actually were our weakest member, god, we would be unstoppable” he said standing up and with a sweet smile. I thought that smile would be my demise. “Don’t say that about yourself. You are definitely not the weakest of us and a computer can’t do the same as you. Can a computer do a shield? Or has molecular kinesis? Can a computer keep us all as a team? Can a computer calm us down? Can a computer be my best friend?” his voice became softer with each question, like it actually affected him that I thought that about myself.

His words made me feel better, even though he was practically putting me in the friendzone. But there was a mistake in his logic, a big one.

“It already is Ice Boy, I am a computer, did you forget?” I looked at him and half-smiled, like I didn’t care not being human. But my eyes were starting to fill with tears, so I don’t really think it was believable.

“You are not!” Oliver said, rolling his eyes. “And you know it. You are a bionic human” He said emphasizing the last word “I get you feel useless and guilty about yesterday, but I assure you you aren’t. Yeah, you did bring Reese, but any of us could have done it, it was just a mistake, you don’t have to beat yourself up because of it” He walked and stood in front of me, looking me in the eyes.
“A mistake that almost cost the life of all the superheroes”  I corrected him

“But it didn’t. And you are allowed to make mistakes” he stopped for some seconds, thinking about something. “Cause you aren’t a machine, Chase. You are human, and humans make mistakes. And a human’s value, your value, doesn’t depend on whether or not you make mistakes. Okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, I know” I said, walking past him to my capsule ‘He feels pity about you. You know that you are useless. You aren’t a good friend, he just didn’t know what to do,’ my head told me. But: ‘He didn’t need to come talk to me, but he did. He is worried. He cares. Oliver is a good friend, he wouldn’t lie to me’ 

“I will rest a bit” I said “I think I need it”

“Yeah, you do.” He said after sighing, but he was smiling. He walked up to me “Take care, please” he kissed my cheek and left the room. 

I touched my face where he had kissed me, not believing what had just happened. I smiled softly and entered my capsule, my bad thoughts going away for a bit ‘maybe I am loved’. I was really tired, so it wasn’t long until I fell asleep

Chapter Text

Chase POV

When I woke up the next day the bad thoughts had returned. ‘You suck at love, why should Oliver be any different?’ I stepped out of my capsule, trying to ignore the voices in my head and went to the bathroom. Oliver and Kaz weren’t awake yet, so I knew I could take my time. I changed the bandages in my arms and sighed, it was a nice day, but I would need to wear long sleeves. It was like living with Adam all over again. I changed clothes and went out.

I walked to the kitchen and made myself a toast. I knew I should eat more, but I didn’t feel hungry. I was about to go to Mission Command to continue my research, when Bree came to the kitchen with a bright smile. 

“Mall day!!” She celebrated and poured herself a glass of juice. 

“Good luck” I simply said before walking to the hydrolift, but my sister ran and blocked my way. 

“You are coming too, we are going to the arcade and cinema. We all need a break, specially you Chase”

“But…”

“You are coming, end of discussion, come on, it will be fun” Bree smiled at me.

I was going to refuse, but Kaz came and talked first

“Come on Chase, it won't be as fun without you” I sighed but smiled 

“Oh, I am sure it would, but alright, I will go” I accepted, I couldn’t say no to Kaz, though I didn’t know why. 

“Great, I will sweep the floor with you at laser tag” He got to the kitchen and started preparing some breakfast for him and Bree. A good choice, as my sister was a menace in the kitchen.

“Don’t be so sure Fire Boy” I said in a challenging way, smiling like I was love sick, of course I didn’t realize that at the moment. 

I went to the kitchen again and sat down on one of the stools. Kaz served three plates of eggs and bacon and left one in front of me.

“Eat, don’t waste my effort” He told me

“I will, I wouldn’t dare refuse something cooked by you”

We ate and talked a bit. It wasn’t long until the other joined us and the kitchen was full of talking and laughter. It felt right. The intrusive thoughts stopped for a while. 

“Hey Leo, are you coming to the mall?” I said sitting next to him on the sofa. My younger brother shook his head.

“Adam and I need to go back to the academy, tonight is karaoke day, but have fun” he laughed softly and half-hugged me “I’ve missed you, you know, right?”

I smiled softly and hugged him back. It felt good to be reminded that I could be missed.

“I’ve missed you too Leo, sorry for not greeting you yesterday I wasn’t totally myself” I apologized, he just smiled

“It’s ok, just… know your team needs you, all of us do. And we love you big boy, no homo” Leo said standing up
I shook my head and rolled my eyes laughing softly 

“Yeah, yeah, I know, love you too Leo” I said while standing up. At that moment Adam came and hugged me a bit too strongly “A-Adam… I can’t breath” 

“Sorry Chasey” he let go of me “Just wanted to say goodbye to my very little brother. Can I toss you?” 

I stepped backwards

“Don’t you dare” my older brother laughed

“Just joking, gonna miss you” he tussled my hair

“Me too, see you at Christmas” he nodded, I could catch a glimpse of worry in his eyes

“Adam, Leo, we need to get going” Mr Davenport called them and they walked to the door

“Bye Guys!” we greeted them and once they left Bree said:

“Team Building time!” We laughed 

“Wait for me, I need to grab my earplugs. No way I’m surviving and arcade with super hearing” I said walking to my room

“You are right, I think it’s too loud and I can actually choose when to use my super hearing” Skylar answered me in a normal voice, but I could still hear her even in my bedroom. I grabbed my earplugs and put them on, immediately feeling the world a bit more bearable

We headed to the mall. We talked all the way there, like we were normal kids. Maybe that was the idea, to feel normal for a bit. Once there we walked to the arcade. Oliver walked closer to me, staying a bit behind the rest of the group.

“You look better, Chase,” he told me, smiling. 

“Thanks, I do feel better” I smiled back at him.

“Great, because I don’t like seeing you like that, you really mean a lot to me, you know?”
I blushed, I really didn’t want to, but I couldn’t help it. Stupid feelings. 

“You mean a lot to me too Oli” 

He kissed my cheek and I was going to make a move, grab his hand or something like that, but we reached the arcade and I lost my opportunity. I didn’t really mind though.

‘Maybe he does like me’ I thought hopefully

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Kaz POV

We were walking to the arcade. Oliver and Chase were talking and walking together, as well as Skylar and Bree, I couldn’t help feeling kind of left out. The odd one out. I was walking in the middle of the two pairs. I looked back a bit at Oliver and Chase, but immediately looked away, jealousy taking over me. I wanted to believe I was just jealous of my best friend having other friends, but I knew it was more than that. It was the way Oliver looked at Chase. I wanted him to look at me that way. But he liked him, and before that he liked Skylar, so I just convinced myself being his best friend was enough. It wasn’t.

I brushed it off trying not to pay attention to them.

“Here we are” I said smiling once we got to the arcade “Let’s get our cards and we can go to the Laser Tag in an hour”

“Sounds good,” Skylar said.

We got our cards and all of us started running around going to the games and trying to beat each other. Luckily we mixed up, going in pairs or trios but changing them between games. An hour later we were all at the entrance of the laser tag.

“Guys vs Girls?” Oliver asked while we were suiting up.

“No way! I need to go against Chase so I can beat him!” I complained

“Don’t you mean so you can get beaten?” he answered me, looking at me in a challenging way. 

“You wish” I smiled. 

“Bionics vs… you know” Skylar said “They are two but they have super intelligence and agility, so I think it won’t be too unbalanced”
We all agreed. 

“But no powers, no intentionally at least. Chase can use his intelligence because he can’t just shut it off, same thing with Skylar’s and Bree’s agility, but no speed, or strength or things like that, alright?” Oliver specified and we all nodded. It’s not like we wanted the place to end up in flames or covered in ice. Though I thought laser tag with powers would be really cool.

“Sounds fair,” Chase agreed as we entered. 

(Little time skip)

It was going pretty evenly, Oliver and I only had one life left as well as Bree, Skylar had two and Chase three. Bree was really good at moving around without being seen, even without her super speed or invisibility, but she didn’t aim that well so Oliver and Skylar could trick her and take her last life. Chase was being very cautious and strategic, but when he got Oliver from behind and eliminated him Skylar could take two of his lives. He quickly hid, looking to the way he knew Skylar was, but he seemed to had forgotten about me as I eliminated him from the other side. So yeah, we won, but we were three and it was the bionic’s first time, so it was kind of expected.

“Told you I would beat you, dude” I teased Chase “You owe me ice cream”

“I never agreed to that” He said, rolling his eyes, trying to seem bothered, but he was smiling.

I took my vest off, still looking at Chase. I wasn’t staring, but I saw one of his sleeves got up a bit and I could see a bandage. He quickly pulled it down again. I was confused, I couldn’t remember him getting hurt in our last battle. I made a mental note to ask him or the team afterwards as we walked to a Mc Donalds. I paid attention to Chase while we ate, to make sure he finished his burger. I was worried about him, no one should skip that many meals in a row. Luckily, he did eat, and he seemed okay. 

After that we watched a science fiction movie we all enjoyed, well, maybe all except Bree. When the sun started to go down we walked to the penthouse. I walked a bit slower, taking in everything. Yeah, we were still after some really dangerous shapeshifters, but I had people who actually cared about me and we were able to have a nice day despite everything. To them I wasn’t one of twelve, like back home. I was Kaz. 

I looked at Oliver, the golden hour hitting him just right. His blue eyes sparkled like they always did when he looked at Chase. His smile that could light up a room, but with the added effect of him talking to his crush.

“Oliver” I called him without even realizing. He turned around and stopped walking so I could catch up with him. The other three stayed ahead.

“Sup?” 

His eyes were still bright like when they were looking at Chase. And in that moment I made an impulsive decision, something pretty common in me, but risky all the same. I would tell him. Even if I knew he didn’t like me. I wanted him to know, I needed to tell him. 

“I need to tell you something” I said quickly 

“Alright…” my best friend answered, clearly confused

We reached the building and got into the elevator

“Later” I mouthed to my best friend. Once in the penthouse, I grabbed Oliver’s hand before I could back down and took him to our bedroom.

When we entered I looked at our hands and immediately let him go.

“Sorry” I mumbled, starting to doubt myself. I had been hiding my crush for way too long, scared that if I told him about it, our friendship would be ruined.

“Kaz, are you okay? What did you want to tell me?” he looked at me with those stupid blue eyes full of worry.

‘It’s fine Kazimieras, your friendship is strong enough to overcome this. It needs to be.

“Alright, this is complicated. I know you like Chase and I completely understand it, I mean he is a really cool guy and all…” I started rambling nervously

“Okay, take a deep breath, calm down and get to the point please”

“Ireallylikeyou” I said quickly, closing my eyes. Oliver didn’t answer for some seconds, he was probably trying to understand what I had said, but my anxiety spiked all the same.

“Oh” I could hear and before I could realize his lips were against mine. And the world stopped. His lips felt cool, but it was exactly the right feeling against mine. I am sure my body temperature went up a few degrees, and I am glad I didn’t set anything on fire.  

“Wow” I whispered when we parted and I opened my eyes, he was smiling at me. His eyes sparkled, but they were looking at me, not at… Chase. Right, Chase. “ I thought you liked Chase” he laughed softly

“It is called polyamorous, you can google it later Kaz. For now, just know I like you too.” and just like that he kissed me again, wrapping his arms around my neck. Like he had waited too long to do it, he probably did, I sure did. I grabbed his waist, feeling my hands just fit in there, and I kissed him back, longing for that fresh sensation. 

  --------

Chase POV

I saw Oliver and Kaz go to our room but didn’t make a big deal about it and went to the kitchen with the girls

“I have to admit that was better than I expected” I said as I ate an apple, smiling. I made a mental note that spending time with other people helped with the intrusive thoughts. I thought it would be the other way around, as they were a pretty common subject in my head. 

“Told you!” my sister answered me and I smiled

“Yeah, you did Bree, well, I will go take a shower before dinner. Sky, don’t let Bree burn the kitchen” I said while heading to the room I shared with my two best friends. I was quite happy and my bad thoughts were almost gone, but that changed the moment I entered my bedroom and saw my two best friends kissing. When they saw me they quickly parted ways.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt. I didn’t think I needed to knock in my own room” The words came out of my mouth like poison. I rushed to the bathroom and looked at the mirror, covering my ears, not wanting to listen to them. My eyes quickly filling with tears. 'I told you Oliver would never love you, come on, you are a freak, an egocentric nerd, you are boring and annoying’. I closed my eyes tightly and waited some seconds before uncovering my ears. Luckily when I did, the earplugs were enough to drown all the voices. I took out my swiss knife from my pocket, carrying it everywhere was starting to be useful. I took off the bandages and, slowly, started cutting my skin. The previous cuts had stopped bleeding, but two more appeared underneath, taking their place. Once the numbing feeling took over me, I took off my clothes and stepped into the shower letting the hot water relax me.

------

Kaz POV

“Ok, that isn’t good. You didn’t tell him you liked him, right?” my best friend shook his head, I sighed in relief “Alright, then it shouldn’t be a problem, right?” I smiled softly

“I mean I still like him, but I guess it shouldn’t. Skylar and Bree are dating, and I don’t think he likes me back, so I don’t see why it would affect him to see us kissing, but we can go talk to him later. Let’s give him some space and go with the girls”

I nodded and we walked to the kitchen, I intertwined my pinky finger with Oliver’s on the way there. He smiled at me.

That’s when I remembered about Chase’s bandages

“Guys” I started once we were with Bree and Skylar “Did Chase get hurt in our last battle?”

They took some seconds to think about it, before the oldest girl shook her head

“Not that I remember” Sky answered “Maybe some bumps and hits, but nothing too serious. Why do you ask Kaz?”

“He has bandages on his arm, I saw them today when he took off his vest.” I let go of Oliver's hand and sat down on one of the stools, a scary thought had just crossed my mind. “If he didn't get hurt during the battle…” I started trying to put my thoughts into words, worried, but Bree interrupted

“What are you suggesting? I don’t think he got hurt on mission command, he is usually pretty careful” She looked a bit scared, I could understand her. I didn’t want to put out another possibility either.

“Kaz, are you trying to say what I think you are?” Oliver asked. It only took a look to know we were thinking the same thing.

“I mean, he clearly isn’t in a good mental state right now”

“Yeah, it is possible that he is hurting himself” my best friend finally said what none of us wanted too. I looked down, wishing it wasn’t true, but knowing it probably was.

“No way. He wouldn't do that, he is the smartest man in the world. Why would he?” Bree asked, looking at the rest of us, but none of us backed her up. Skylar grabbed her hand.

“I’m not the best with human stuff, but I think it has nothing to do with intelligence,” she said.

“And Skylar just said it, he is human too, so sadly and scaredly as it is, it is a possibility” Oliver added. Bree sat down too, probably not being able to give any argument against it 

Chapter Text

Bree POV
I grabbed my head and felt as Skylar hugged me. I was shocked, I couldn’t believe my younger brother was a cutter. Actually, the worst part was that I could totally believe it. He had always been under so much pressure.

“I should have realized…” I murmured “He is my baby brother”

“Babe, it’s okay, he probably didn’t want us to realize. And we won’t gain anything by regretting the past, all we can do is help him” my girlfriend told me, amazing how the alien understood better, but maybe being raised in a basement didn’t help. 

“Well, yesterday when I went to my room to talk with Chase and told him we needed to talk, he asked me if we wanted him out of the team. Like Douglas said, he really thought so” Oliver started “He said it was just strategical, that he didn’t have superpowers and a computer could do the same as him”

“But that’s not true!” I interrupted him, I knew I wasn’t helping, but I was worried and really wasn’t thinking straight. 

“I tried to tell him that, but I don’t think he believed me” He sighed “and he feels guilty about Reese”

“Well, he also saw Oliver and I kissing and reacted quite badly” Kaz said slowly

“Are you two dumb?” I said glaring at them. I couldn’t believe boys were really that oblivious “Chase likes Oliver, it is obvious”

“What!?” the two boys shouted, Kaz stood up. I rolled my eyes, I would have made fun of them if Chase’s heart wasn’t in the middle.

“Well, yeah, even I realized it, and I am an alien” Skylar answered and I sighed

“Oh no, this is bad, this is bad” Kaz started mumbling and walking back and forth. 

“Ok Kaz, calm down, we need to help Chase and we can’t do it if we are panicking” Oliver tried to calm the other boy 

“But Oliver, we made it worse, he could be cutting right now and it would be our fault, and…” the boy started rambling again, but he stopped when Skylar slapped him

“Kaz, calm down!” 

“Thanks, needed that”

“Ok, maybe we should look up depression symptoms and see if Chase has it. As much as I hate the idea of my brother having depression, if we know it we can help him” I said, having already calmed down a bit. I got into work mode, it wasn’t that difficult if you were trained your whole life to be able to put aside your feelings and concentrate on the task at hand. 

Oliver nodded and grabbed his cellphone, looking up the depression symptoms and then telling us all of them

“He is totally feeling guilty, and he always wakes up early” He said

“He is skipping meals too” Kas added

“Shit, I think Chase had depression some years ago. He wouldn’t talk to us, couldn’t sleep, didn’t eat and lost a lot of weight, Mr. Davenport told us it was only adolescence. But I guess it wasn’t.” I sighed, feeling like a bad sister, even though I had no way of knowing better “We should pay attention to him to see if we find other symptoms” my teammates nodded

“Well guys, we have a mission” Skylar said and I smiled softly

“As you order, mission leader” I answered joking around a bit, trying to lighten the mood.

“Hi kids, what are you talking about?” Douglas asked as he started making dinner. I immediately decided to tell him the truth, yeah he hadn’t been the best father, or uncle, but he had demonstrated he cared about us, and we needed all the help we could get.

“Chase. We are worried about him. We think he may have depression”

“That is quite possible” he sighed “I had the same suspicion after talking to him, but didn’t want to rush to conclusion. He reminds me a lot of myself, sadly. But if you think so too, I think we should do something about ir. If he actually has depression, he needs your help. From all of you. Mostly because, knowing him, he won’t agree to see a specialist. Not now at least” I nodded, he was right, it was difficult enough for Chase to admit he needed help to us, let alone to someone else.

Kaz turned on the tv trying to lighten up the mood a bit and we all ate dinner before going to bed

--------

Chase POV

I waited until Kaz and Oliver fell asleep to come out of my capsule. I couldn’t sleep so I decided I would continue my research. Work distracted me from my horrible thoughts, and made me feel useful, so it was a win-win situation, who needed to sleep anyway? I went to Mission Command l, trying not to make too much noise, and started, once again, my research on Reese, Roman and Riker’s shapeshifting molecules. I stayed awake all night without realizing, I knew I was really closed to getting somewhere, but I didn’t know what was missing. Even though I was working my head still managed to tell me how useless and weak I was, it had become almost a soundtrack in my mind. I eventually came up with an idea: some years before Douglas had told me that he could give me super strength and speed, and maybe even more powers, so maybe he could make me more useful. 

I was trying a new method when someone entered the place, that someone was my adoptive uncle.

“Douglas, great, I wanted to ask you something…” I started, but he interrupted me

“Did you stay all night here without sleeping?” 

“Yes, but…” I would say I didn't know why it mattered, but I did know, I just didn’t want to accept it. 

“You didn’t have dinner yesterday, did you eat something for breakfast?”

“No…”

“Are you telling me you haven’t eaten anything since yesterday afternoon?” He sounded mad, but I knew he was worried.
“I am not hungry, just…” ‘Great, you made him worry again, you can’t just stop being a burden, can you?’ I tried to shove down the intrusive thoughts.

“I won’t help you until you eat something”

I sighed knowing he was more stubborn than me.

“Alright” I said walking into the hyperlift. Once in the penthouse I grabbed an apple and went back down again, biting into the fruit. 

“I am eating an apple. Now, can I talk to you?” I continued eating.

“That isn’t a meal Chase. But fine, it’s better than nothing” He grabbed the bridge of his nose “What did you want to ask me?”

“I want you to give me more abilities” I said, looking him straight in the eyes

“Why?” was all he said, he held my gaze, almost like he was challenging me.

I looked at him confused, I thought the answer was obvious.

“Why? Maybe because all my powers are repeated, Douglas. Skylar has acuter senses than me, she can make a laser bo and shield and she also has telekinesis. Which is so much better than my molecular kinesis because, if you didn’t know, it’s stronger. And my thermal and bionic vision are useless if Skylar has x-ray vision and can sense invisible people. She even has microscopic vision too!” My voice was getting louder and menacing to break, so I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. Tears started to form in my eyes, I hated admitting I was useless “Don’t get me wrong, I am happy that she got her powers back, but god, she even is a better mission leader than I ever was. Bree has super powers. The four of them have good transportation methods, flying and running at amazing speeds, while I need to walk, I only slow them. You don’t need super intelligence when you have a computer, you don’t need me to scan or record stuff when you have scanners. I am sure I could invent a pocket invention with most of my abilities. I am sure you could” ‘But you feel sorry for me’ the last part I thought but didn’t say. “You don’t want me to quit the team, please make me useful” I almost begged him

“Chase, you are useful, you just don’t realize it. And if you feel bad about yourself now, gaining more power won’t help, trust me, I know.” He said after shaking his head softly. 

“No I am not. No you don’t. My team, they need someone stronger. They need someone that can contribute something to the team. Not only a computer with a flashdrive. Tell me, since this team began, when did I use my force field ball? Or my physical recognition app? Thermal scan? Senses recording? Microscopic or sonar vision? Levitation? Or even my laser bo? That one I loved using” My eyes were all red and wet “Never! I never used them because they are useless or someone else can do it better. I just need more abilities. That way I can be of use. That way they won’t leave me, please” My head was a mush, something ironic being a bionic human whose ability was its mind. But I couldn’t think straight, my head hurt, the lights were too bright, I didn’t know what I was saying outloud and what I was just thinking. 

“The answer is still a no, Chase” Douglas answered grabbing the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes “God, I sound like Donald” He sighed and looked at me “But if you don’t believe in yourself now you won’t believe in yourself with more powers either” he walked to the hyperlift “And don’t even think on trying to do it yourself. Go talk to the others, it will make you feel better”

Once he left I slid against the wall and sat down, hugging my knees. The tears silently rolled on my cheeks. 

‘He is right, even if I had more powers I would still be useless’

I heard steps and quickly stood up, trying to dry my tears. But they continued falling, my hands were shaking and my breath was unsteady. I tried to look okay, but knew i probably looked like shit. I looked at the people who had just entered, expecting faces of disappointment, or disgust. Instead I was met with warm and strong arms hugging me. At first I tensed, but I took a deep, and shaky, breath and let myself relax into the embrace, hugging Kaz back.

------

Kaz POV

Skylar, Bree, Oliver and I were in the tunnels cleaning and organizing all the stuff, all my stuff, that was in there, and coming up with ideas of how to help our friend, when we heard Chase’s yells. We got closer and listened to everything. When we heard Douglas leaving we looked at each other and knew what we had to do. We entered mission command, no words needed, I hugged him, holding him close. I felt him tense up, but he immediately relaxed in my arms and started crying softly against my shoulder. My heart broke in a way I couldn’t explain, I just felt this need to protect him and make sure he was okay. Bree got closer to us, caressing Chase’s hair and back, humming a soft tune. Chase’s breath slowly got steadier and he stopped trembling, and once he stopped crying he let go of me.

“I am sorry you saw me like that guys” he murmured when he realized all of us were there and not just Bree and me.  

“Can I talk with him a bit?” I asked my other teammates.

“Okay, but next time is my turn,” Bree said, letting Skylar pull her to the hydrolift. Oliver looked at me and I nodded softly, reassuring him that I knew what I was doing. 

I sat down as they went to the penthouse.

“Come here” I patted the floor next to me. He looked hesitant but finally sat down. “First of all, you aren’t useless. Secondly, it is okay to be weak sometimes, Bud, it’s part of life. Trust me, it took me a long time to come to terms with that” I looked at him but he avoided my gaze.

“I know, I know,” He sighed. “I promise I’m fine, it’s just…” he laid his head against the wall, looking upwards. 

“Please don’t freak out, we know you are cutting” Chase deserved to know that we knew. 

-----

Chase POV

Of course I freaked out.
‘Great, now they know how weak I am. What do they think? Maybe they think I just want attention. Or that I am a crying baby. Maybe they realized how broken I am. Or maybe they are glad, maybe they agree you deserve it.’

“What?? How?? I am sorry, I will be stronger. Or I’m not sorry, cause I kind of deserve it? I don’t even know” I murmured and was about to continue but Kaz passed his arm through my shoulders and pulled me closer. I laid my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes tightly. The warmth felt nice. 

“For God’s sake Chase, don’t ever say that again. You don’t deserve to get hurt, you deserve good things. And what did I just tell you? It’s okay to be weak sometimes, and we are your family, we want to help you, but we can’t do it if you don’t trust us and tell us what is happening” my best friend told me, but I couldn’t look him in the eyes. 

I was ashamed. I was ashamed of cutting. I was ashamed of crying. I was ashamed of being broken. I was ashamed of them knowing. I was ashamed of being me. I moved a bit to the side, getting away from his embrace. I immediately missed the sensation, but I felt like I didn’t deserve it. I looked away. Kaz sighed.

“You don’t need to feel ashamed of being a cutter,” he said, like he had just read my mind. He pulled up his sleeve showing some small scars “Yes, it sucks, but it isn’t something to be ashamed of. You will get over this. But you can’t do it alone. So, what do you say? Will you tell me?”

I nodded and looked at him.

“Alright, I will. But it is kind of long” I agreed
“Don’t worry about it, just go ahead, we have all the time in the world” Kaz assured me.

I took a deep breath

“OK, here I go”

Chapter Text

Chase POV

My head was screaming from not to tell him anything, saying he would hate me or leave, but I pushed through. I knew I would feel better. So I started spilling all my deepest thoughts to my best friend.

“This will be kind of the story of my life, because I can’t really pinpoint a start of feeling like this. Growing up only being able to interact with two older siblings with super physical abilities, and a millionaire who knew nothing about parenting wasn’t the best experience. Adam and Bree always mocked me and pushed me around, sometimes literally. I don’t blame them, no one ever told them it wasn’t okay, for us it was normal. Mr Davenport never scolded them, as I grew older he just told me I should do better and that they looked up to me because I was the mission leader. Never really believed that part. When we started school I needed to use long sleeves to hide all the bruises from Adam. Not like it matters, as they bullied me at school too. Eventually I got new abilities and Adam and Bree started respecting me more, but you met Adam, the teasing never stopped” I said everything trying to make it sound like it wasn’t a big deal. It didn’t sound that big of a deal to me anymore. I looked at Kaz, surprised that he was paying attention to me. He nodded, incentivising me to continue. “This isn’t the first time I’ve felt like this. I felt like I had touched rock bottom. I didn’t cut, it could prove dangerous in missions. I didn’t think of killing myself, I could be useful in a mission, and people’s lives depended on us. But I constantly wished I was never created. But I didn’t say anything. I was mission leader, I couldn’t show weakness, cause if I did, they would take my role, and I would be nothing.” I bit my lip, I wasn’t mission leader anymore. I was nothing. Tears starting forming in my eyes once again

“Then we became famous, yay! But of course nobody cared about me, I was only the flash glue, keeping hustle and muscle together, as Mr Davenport and my siblings used to tell me. Then the academy, a place where people would truly look up to me, right? Wrong, I soon realized I was the boring teacher. My super ability is my brain and I can even teach, ironic, right? I became really close with one of our students, Sebastian, I even developed a crush on him, kind of embarrassing to be honest. But things started to get better, he would help me and spend time with me, we even got in a relationship. Someone finally seemed to care about me for who I was. He betrayed us. He even tried to kill Big D” I was trying to pull back my tears “Then this team started. At first I thought it could be a good opportunity, a new team to lead, one that maybe would appreciate me. It turns out I am not shaped to be a leader. After all those years being it… Maybe Bree or Adam would have made better leaders. And most of the rest you already know. AJ told me what I had been thinking for a while: I am the weakest member. I am useless. With what Skylar told and showed us I quickly realized my powers were useless compared to hers. So I rarely use them nowadays. Bree even got superpowers. And me? I fell again for the same trap, someone saying they liked me, I was so happy, it was too good to be true. So, of course, it wasn’t. Reese betrayed me too. I fell again, although I think I never really got out of it. And I cut. I am no use in missions, so it’s okay. I stay awake all night, I don’t eat well. And I just feel that…” I took a deep breath trying to stop my voice from breaking, the tears were already streaming down my cheeks. “I just feel like I am useless, broken. I feel like I disappointed you. I don’t belong to this team, I only slow you down, but still you don’t tell me to go. And… And…” I was going to tell Kaz about my huge crush on Oliver, but I remembered the two of them kissing and decided to keep that to myself “And I feel like I shouldn’t be complaining, I am the son of a billionaire, I have powers, I am a hero… The thing is, I don’t feel like a hero. Heroes aren’t supposed to be broken. But I sure am. I am supposed to be the smartest man in the world, but I keep messing up and making mistakes that almost cost lives.How can I be the smartest man in the world if I am so dumb and stupid?”

I quickly dried my tears with my sleeve, but more started coming, so I looked down. I took a deep breath trying to keep my breathing steady. ‘Calm down, you can’t break down in front of him. At least not more than you already did. Look down, stay quiet, he will leave’ But he didn’t.

“Chase” Kaz said “Chase, look at me” I said as he did and he grabbed my shoulders “Listen to me. You are not useless. You are not dumb or stupid. And for sure you are not broken. Cause you said it, you are the smartest MAN in the world, not the smartest machine. You are human, just like everyone else, so you are allowed to make mistakes and mess things up just like we all do. You are allowed to feel guilty, hollowed. You are not broken just because you cut or feel down. It doesn’t mean there’s something inherently wrong with you, it just means you need some more love and help. And I know you won’t believe it right now, but everything I’m saying is true, and I will repeat it as many times as it is necessary.” He sighed. “Look, I know right now it feels like you will never beat it, but believe me, it is possible. I have 11 siblings, it was difficult feeling loved and important. I had depression. I cut too. And I can tell you it is possible to get out. But it won’t be easy”

“Sorry, it feels unfair to complain about my life knowing you had it worse” I half-smiled, but looked away.

“This isn’t a competition of who had it worse. It doesn’t matter, you can feel bad having a good life. Not your case, I wouldn’t trade my life for yours, I can’t imagine what growing up with no contact with the outside world feels like. But considering your childhood, it’s surprising Adam, Bree and you aren’t more messed up.”

“But…”
“No, shut it, I’m not done yet” my best friend cut me out. “You are the best strategist ever, you always come up with a way to solve things even if you are not the leader. You are always the first one willing to sacrifice yourself. You are brave and caring. And you are the responsible one around here. And just because your powers are somehow ‘repeated’ that doesn't make them any less cooler. Come on! A laser bo? Why did you never use it? I would love to see it.” He stood up and lent me his hand to help me stand up too “So, what do you say if we  have lunch and afterward we go train and you show me all those amazing powers you have been hiding from us. And maybe after that we can go with the others and we can all try to convince you of how useful you are”

I chuckled softly, drying my eyes and stood up with his help. I was already feeling a bit better. Knowing this feeling could end and it wasn’t permanent was a relief. And listening to Kaz say all those nice things and be genuinely excited to see my powers, definitely made me feel good.

“Alright”

We started walking to the hyperlift

“Wait, one more thing” Kaz said, stopping on his tracks, he didn’t look at me. “Oliver likes you. Like a lot. And Bree told us you liked him, so you two should talk”

“Wait? What?! But he kissed you! I thought he liked you” I said, clearly confused. When I was that emotional my super intelligence didn’t work that well. Of course there were multiple logical answers to that, but the easiest one was that Oliver liked Kaz.

“Well, he does. But he also likes you. Something about polimorus” he answered shrugging, but I could tell he actually cared.  

“Polyamorous” I corrected him after chuckling “I didn’t know he was polyamorous too”

“Wait, too? Are you that? What does it mean?” He asked, finally looking at me. 

I laughed and raised up my arms

“Chill. Yes, I am polyamorous too. It is when you can have a crush or be in love with more than one person at the same time” I heard an ‘ooohhh’ and continued, smiling softly “You like Oliver, don’t you?”

Kaz sighed and nodded softly, before quickly adding

“But he is all yours, I prefer him as my best friend”

I made a mental note to talked to Oliver about that, knowing he was lying

“Whatever you say, fire boy. Now let’s go eat something, I’m starving.”

Chapter Text

Chase pov

(Time skip, sorry, don’t wanna right fighting sequences yet)

Kaz and I were walking to the kitchen after training 

“I don’t understand. Isn’t Oliver still in love with Skylar? I mean he did kiss me in the cheek” I hadn’t asked anything during training, as it actually escaped my mind. I had been enjoying myself a lot with Kaz.

“Chase, come on. Is not like he can be with Skylar, her being a lesbian and all that. And if he is poliamorous…” while my best friend was saying that we reached the kitchen, where Skylar and Bree were
“Yeah you are right, it’s just hard to accept”

“Leave it Kaz, Chase doesn’t really understand human emotions” My sister said jokingly, but I just nodded. They escaped logic, I hated not being able to analyze them and find a solution. 

“They are too complicated. I thought Oliver hated me and stopped being mean to me for the sake of the team and now he likes me?” I said before sighed and sitting down on the sofa, Kaz sat next to me

“Finally someone gets me” Skylar told me

“You told him. I told you not to tell anyone!!” I heard Oliver before seeing him. He sounded furious.

“Geez dude, he likes you too, and he was sad,” fire said, raising his hands in surrender, while ice walked towards him with his hands into fists. 

I stood up and got in between them, worried one of them would end up hurt. And knowing Oliver would probably regret it later.

“Oli, calm down, it’s ok” I said grabbing his wrist and I could feel him relaxing “Alright, we need to talk before you kill Kaz” I said calmly before turning around to see the other boy “Sorry Kaz, but the ‘Convince Chase of his worth’ session will have to wait. Thanks for training with me”

“Yeah, anytime dude, just take him out of here before I die” Kaz answered, holding a pillow as a shield. 

I couldn’t help but laugh and started walking to my room, pulling Oliver with me. My hand slid into his, but he didn’t complain. I was feeling quite better after taking all off my shoulders and seeing Kaz amazed by my powers. When we entered the bedroom I sat on the bed

“Forgive Kaz, please, he was just trying to make me feel better” I said, patting the place next to me on the bed.

“Did it work?” he asked, cautiously ,still standing up

“Yeah, kind of. I mean, of course it feels good when your crush likes you back” I smiled, looking at him through my eyelashes. It seemed like that was the correct answer, because he sat next to me.

“Your crush?”

“Yeah, I like you too, ice boy. Is it that hard to believe?” I turned and put my leg on the bed to be able to see him.

“But Reese…” he started

“Oliver, do I really need to explain poliamory to you? Kaz mentioned you already know what it is” that got a soft laugh out of him, and suddenly I felt like I could never get tired of that sound. “But yeah, that’s the kind of. You know, a good percentage of my crushes actually betrayed me and tried to kill my loved ones. I am really hoping you don’t follow that path”

“God, no, never. We are on the same team, remember? I would never hurt you, Chase” he grabbed my hand.

“Yeah, I know” but I didn't truly believe him, my brain was screaming for me to leave, to not trust him, to not put my guard down. I changed the subject “You know? I really thought you hated me for a while. And I thought you still resented me because of Skylar and Kaz”

“I never hated you, I was only jealous. And I thought you found me annoying at first. So yeah, I am like really glad you like me back” Oliver said, and I could tell, he was smiling and his eyes were almost glowing. He looked really pretty. 

I smiled and kissed his cheek. He quickly grabbed my chin and left a soft kiss on my lips. It was short, but it was amazing. 

“Kaz also told me you like him. You should have seen him today, when I was showing him some abilities you guys don’t know about, his eyes glowed and he couldn’t stop smiling like a child” I said, remembering the training, it had actually been really cute.

“Is there something you want to tell me Chase?” Oliver asked, smirking and raising and eyebrow at me. 

I laughed and shook my head

“I don’t like Kaz” I stood up, still holding his hand “But he is cool, you should really date him” I smiled softly

“I think that’s my decision to make. And I choose you. You said it, we have more in common than anyone in the house” my crush said, standing up too.

And that felt incredible. Being chosen, before anyone else, for probably the first time in my life. Someone chose me, for me. Not for my team, or my family, or my abilities. Just for who I was. But my brain was still in fight or flight mode, telling me to leave before I could get hurt, and I knew Oliver didn’t deserve that. I liked him, I really did, and that’s why I made the decision I made. Probably one of the hardest in my life.

“I would love to date you, but I don’t think doing it right now it’s the smart choice” I answered, choosing my words carefully. 

“Oh” He said, I could see the disappointment in his face and it hurt like hell.

“I like you, I really do. Please don’t doubt that. But my emotional and mental state right now isn’t the best, I think you know. I need to work things and get better before I can be a good, or at least decent, boyfriend. One that you deserve, okay?” My eyes stinged, I knew I was making the correct choice, but it still hurt.

“I will wait for you” 

He would wait for me.

“Thank you. But you don’t have to. I mean, yes, please, let’s date when I’m better, but” And what I said afterwards surprised me, specially because I was really sure about it, more than I expect it “as long as he is okay with it, and with you dating me in the future, I don’t mind you dating Kaz”

“Wait, really?” he asked, his eyes glowing, his smile widening. And I knew I was sure, if it meant he would be that happy, I was so sure.

“Yeah, I am actually okay with it. I’m not jealous, and I can tell you really like him. Go get your fire boy, I promise I will tell you when I’m ready”

“I promise I will be here when you are. But, first, can I kiss you? Once, and then we will wait.” he looked at me with pleading eyes and my heart skipped a beat.

“Y-yeah, of course” He stepped towards me and put his hand on the back of my neck, pulling me closer. And he kissed me, a real kiss. And god, I finally understood what the big deal around kisses was. At that moment I knew I would get better, if only to be able to kiss Oliver again. We eventually parted and I am sure I had the smile of a fool in love.

“Wow” it’s all I could say. Oliver just laughed

“I didn’t know I kissed so well”

“You do, trust me, you do” I passed my hand through my hair “Okay, I should really take a shower, I am really sweaty from training”

“Yeah, you should.” I looked at him like I was offended. He smiled. “I will go with the other” 

“Talk to Kaz!”

“I will!”

I smiled and went to the bathroom, my thoughts were calm, but I knew something: I wasn’t fine. And if I really wanted to get better, I couldn’t do it alone. So I took my second hard decision of the day: I was gonna ask for help.

I put on my clothes after showering and went straight to mission command, where Douglas was. When I passed through the living room I saw Kaz and Oliver holding hands and I smiled, happy for them. I took the hyperlift down.

“Hi Douglas, sorry for before” i said while entering, remembering how I got angry at him. 

“Oh, it’s alright, I see you understood” he answered with a smile, looking up from his tablet

“Completely, you were right.” I took a deep breath ““I’ve been feeling bad. I think you noticed. Like really bad. And I think I need help. I would like to see a specialist” I looked down, ashamed. It was really hard to admit it, it felt like a failure. But I wanted to get better, and I knew that step was necessary.

‘He is gonna tell you how useless and a failure you are’

“I am so proud of you Chase” my uncle said, shutting up the voices in my head.

“Wait, what?” I said looking at him

“It’s hard to admit you need help, so I am proud of you, for that and all of the things you’ve done. I’m sorry, I know I don’t say it enough” he smiled and opened his arms “Now come here”

I was not much of a hugger, but I accepted nonetheless, at that moment a hug sounded good.

“Only one thing” I said as we parted. “Please don't tell anyone, please” I asked him. It was a bit much to have the others know. I would tell them eventually, just not everything at the same time.

“But Chase…”

“Please Douglas. I promise I will tell them, just give me time”

He sighed and nodded 

“Alright, I will set you an appointment and say nothing. I think I saw a therapist in Mighty Med’s data.”

“Thanks!” I smiled and went to one of the tables, taking out my notes “Hey, I tried separating the transforming cells of Roman and Ryker and I did it, but they are only temporary, do you think you could help me?” 

I had been stuck in the same part of my research for sometime. But if I could make it, it would be huge.

“I’m not sure I can think of something you haven’t, but of course, let me see”

I handed him my notes

“Two heads think better than one, even if one is a super intelligent bionic” Douglas smiled and started reading. I told him what I had tried and my hypothesis of why it wasn’t working.

We worked for a few minutes in silence before I talked again.

“So, I don’t really know what Reese did to you and what the doctors said” I mumbled while making some equations to figure out the stability. 

“Well, she almost got me blind and I will have a sore throat for sometime, but nothing to worry about. I was released pretty quickly, the doctors say I got lucky.”

I hit the table, frustration and anger boiling inside of me. I didn’t like my family getting hurt or in danger, ironic considering most of us are heroes. 

“I am sorry, I promise I will make her pay for what she did to you”

My creator smiled and put a hand on my shoulder

“Make her pay for what she did to you” I nodded, it was easier to be angry about him than about myself, but I understood his point. “I will go make dinner, we already solved your mistake from last time, so you should be able to finish the sample on your own”

“Alright” I continued working as he left. 

I managed to make the particles stable enough to analyze them and make a sensor. I started testing it, but then I heard the hyperlift

“Hey Chase”

“Hey Bree” I answered without taking my eyes from my experiment. I wanted to see if it really worked. “What’s up?”

“I wanted to talk” That made me look at her and put down the particle reader.

“Oh, alright, what do you want to talk about?”

“I just wanted to say sorry for all the years of mocking you. And how I reacted to Reese. I know she didn’t actually like you, but I do believe someone can do it, and I am not saying this only because Oliver does, I actually do believe it. And any girl or boy who gets to date you is really lucky.” Bree half-smiled at me, “Do you forgive me?”

I knew she was being sincere, and I knew this type of emotional vulnerability was hard for our family, being raised in a basement and all that stuff. So I nodded. 

“Of course I do, I know you didn’t mean all those things. We aren’t the best at interacting with other people” 

But it felt good to hear it from her, it took the arguments away from the voices in my head. 

“Not at all” she laughed “I tease you but I am probably as awkward as you are. But thanks for forgiving me”

“You are my sister” I shrugged “I am kind of stuck with you, so I don’t have much choice” I teased her.

“Hey!” she faked being offended, but she was smiling “Dinner is ready, so we should head up” I nodded “And please know that if you ever need to talk I will always be here for you.”

“I know, thanks Bree” I smiled “What do you say if after dinner we see one of those shitty tv comedies that Eddie used to reference?”

“Sounds like a plan”