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Chapter Text

When his class ended that day, Isak barely waved his classmates goodbye and stormed off the university building. He was beginning to hang out with a few of them, they got the habit of grabbing coffee or something to eat after. Isak wasn’t very comfortable having to make new friends at first but it wasn’t so terrible after all. Most of the time, it was even pretty nice, but others like this day, he got overwhelmed by the idea of having to open up to those new people who didn’t know him like Jonas and his friends from Nissen. The idea of having to come out again, to explain why he never saw his family and had been living in a flatshare since he was sixteen. He was not ready for that, so for now, he was just pretending to be cool and carefree. And on some days, it was just exhausting.

He could just go to Jonas’ or see some of his friends from high school, but they all seemed to be adjusting so well to this new student life compared to him, he was afraid it would only make him even more insecure.

He didn’t want to go home either and face Eskild constant questioning. How did Isak, the most private and secretive person, ended up living with a guy with so little personal boundaries, it still baffled him. He knew that it always came from a good place, that Eskild saw Isak wasn’t happy and had trouble adapting to this new chapter of his life. He only wanted to help him, but today Isak just wanted to be left alone. His other roommate, Noora, was more respectful of his privacy but he saw her worried and questioning looks, he could hear her whispering with Eskild on the other side of their apartment's paper thin walls. He loved them, he really did, they had been there for him when he was at his lowest, but sometimes it was just too much.

.

Isak was wandering aimlessly through the streets of Oslo. It was early autumn and already quite chilly, the cold bite of the wind on his face helping him clear his mind a bit. 

He felt his phone buzzing in his pocket but whether it was Jonas asking him if he wanted to hang out, Eskild wanting to know when he would be home or his father trying to reach out as he had for the last few weeks, Isak just didn’t want to know. What he wanted was to turn everything off and find a place where he could have some peace and quiet.

He turned on the corner of a street and his suddenly stopped walking as his eyes were drawn to a bright billboard and a word in capital red letters :

CINEMA

Well, that’s perfect , Isak thought.

That was exactly what he needed. He would turn his phone off and have a couple of hours to himself, forgetting everything and everyone as he’d watch a movie... So he went in.

It was still quite early in the afternoon, he didn’t have a lot of classes on thursdays, so they were very few people inside. Isak had never been in this cinema before and as he began taking in his surroundings, he realized he was in one of those small theaters that programmed independent and artsy movies, even old black and white films.

And nope, that was not what Isak had in mind. At all. What he needed was a freaking blockbuster, something that required a minimum of thinking from him and that he could watch while eating a giant bucket of popcorn.

He was ready to turn around and walk away when he heard a deep voice say, “Halla.”

Isak turned around to find himself in front of the ticket office. A boy was sitting behind the desk, looking at Isak with a broad smile on his face. Isak felt his breath hitch when he laid eyes on him. The boy looked a little bit older than him, he had smooth blond hair styled in an elaborated quiff, the most beautiful blue eyes Isak had ever seen and his lips… Oh boy, Isak couldn’t help but instantly wonder how those full and rosy lips would feel against his own.

When he saw the boy’s smile slightly faltering, he realized he must have been staring at those lips for far too long.

He snapped back to respond awkwardly, “Hum ha… halla”

The boy tilted his head on one side and gave Isak another wide smile that made Isak’s heart skip a beat. Fuck he could feel his cheeks blushing and he knew he was supposed to say something but he just froze completely.

“So... what are you here to see ?” The boy asked, lifting his eyebrows, his voice just slightly amused.

“Hum, I don’t know actually… I don’t know any of those movies. I’ve...uh… never been here before.” said Isak, feeling a little bit embarrassed and out of place.

Damn it, in any other circumstances, Isak would have already left this place but he felt such a strong pull towards this boy who was looking at him with nothing but the kindest look in his eyes. Walking out felt almost physically impossible.

“Ok no worries, I can recommend something, that’s what I’m here for !" the boy said warmly, "Well, there’s a screening of Parasite starting in a few minutes. It’s a movie by Bong Joon-ho, he’s a korean director. This guy is insanely talented and Parasite actually won the Palme d’or at the last Cannes Film Festival. It’s a great movie, I promise you. So, what do you say ?”

Bong Joon-ho… Palme d’or… what ?!

“Um… ok, yeah, sounds good”

The boy looked absolutely delighted and Isak couldn’t believe he was the reason for that. As he gave Isak his ticket, the boy winked at him and said “Here you go, enjoy the film !”

And if that wink wasn’t enough, their fingers brushed lightly, making Isak’s skin tingle and his face blush even more. He managed to give the boy a muffled “thanks” before heading to the screening room, his breath caught in his throat.

There were only a few people scattered around the room, Isak sat in an empty row and took a deep breath. He replayed the conversation (if you could even call it that) he had with the cashier and hoped he didn’t make a complete fool out of himself.

He quickly googled this Palme d’or thing while waiting for the film to begin and groaned. So apparently that was a prestigious prize for art cinema. Fuck… was he really about to spend more than two hours watching a pompous artsy movie just because a cute boy smiled at him ?

Come on Isak, get a grip… 

But to be honest, it wasn’t just a cute boy. He was the most handsome boy Isak had ever seen and his smile had filled his body with the most wonderful warmth, and clearing his mind of all his anxieties.

.

The film began and well, Isak wasn’t expecting that… at all. Instead of the pretentious artsy movie he imagined, Parasite turned out to be an intense thriller, both funny and nerve-wracking, that never stopped surprising you with unexpected twists and a mix of different genre, leaving you on the edge of your seat. He had never seen anything like it.

When the credits rolled, he had to take a minute to come to before he stood up and got out of the room. As he got closer to the ticket office, he felt his heart start stammering in his chest. Isak only wanted to be able to see him again before leaving. What he was not expecting, was the boy gesturing to him with an expectant look.

“So ? What did you think ? Did it blow your mind ?” he seemed so genuinely excited to have his opinion, Isak didn’t really understand why. 

“Well, it kind of did yeah !” Isak chuckled.

“Ha ! I knew it !” the boy exclaimed while his face was once more illuminated by the most blinding smile. Gosh his passion and enthusiasm were so endearing, Isak felt butterflies fill his belly and he knew he was probably blushing again.

The boy was about to add something but a line of customers was beginning to form in front of his desk so Isak just said, “So anyway um, thanks for the recommandation”

“Yeah of course, anytime.” The boy seemed disappointed to have to cut their conversation short, or was Isak just projecting his own feelings ?

“I’m Even, by the way.”

“Isak.”

Even nodded before turning towards the next customer.

Isak walked toward the doors of the cinema, but before he went out, he turned around to see him one last time, only to find Even looking back at him while an old couple was arguing before his desk, to decide which movie their were going to see. They locked eyes for a moment. Isak felt like everything became still and silent around him, just like in the movies when everyone suddenly moves in slow motion. But then Even had to look away and turn back to the couple who had finally made its choice.

.

Isak started heading home, his knees a little wobbly. It was already getting dark and it was even colder that before but he didn’t care. He walked all the way back to his apartment feeling ridiculously warm and fuzzy inside.

When he got home and Eskild started bombarding him with questions - Where have you been ? Why are you home so late ? Have you turned your phone off ? - he just rolled his eyes almost fondly before answering with a grin, “I’m alright mum, I was just busy and my phone died okay ?”

“Well, someone’s cheeky tonight…” Eskild said with a mischievous look.

“Whatever, I have homework to do so…”

Before Eskild could say anything else, Isak headed to his room, closed the door and let himself fall on his bed. He just laid on his back, his head dizzy, feeling his heart beating a little bit faster than usual as images of the blue eyed boy occupied his every thought.

Even...

Chapter Text

Isak had spent the next couple of days on a cloud, free of the stress and the insecurities that overwhelmed him before he ended up in this cinema.

He could see all the things that seemed so overwhelming on thursday in a completely  different light. Classes he felt he could never keep up with revealed to be absolutely fascinating, having a few drinks with his classmates on friday night wasn’t so scary at all and when he went out with the boy squad on saturday, he felt so comfortable, as if nothing had changed, he didn’t understand how he could ever stress about the idea of being around them.

Also, for the first time since he started Uni, he was sleeping like a baby. For weeks he couldn’t get a good night sleep, his mind racing with thoughts and worries he couldn’t silence. But for the last few days, all he could think about when he was lying in his bed, where Even’s blue eyes and the soothing sound of his voice lulling him to sleep.

He felt good, so incredibly good.

 .

It was just another lazy sunday at the Kollektiv.

Noora and Isak were chilling in the living room, Noora reading a book while sipping a cup of tea, Isak on his computer listening to music and sending stupid memes to Jonas.

Had he just spent hours searching for Even on every social medias with the very little info he had ? Absolutely.

They both looked up when they heard Eskild coming out of his bedroom. He emerged in the living room, barely awake from his drunken night, wrapped in his blanket and after grunting good morning , he let himself fall heavily the on the couch next to Isak, his head resting on Isak’s shoulder.

Isak chuckled and asked “Rough night ? Do you need an aspirin or something ?”

Eskild looked up at him and squinted.

“Okay, what’s going on ?” he asked.

“What do you mean ?”, said Isak, puzzled.

“You’ve been really weird these last few days Isak…”

“Weird how ?” he shrugged.

“I don’t know you’re just very…” Eskild sat up and looked at Isak intently, “...nice.”

“Okay…  Does that mean I’m a dickhead the rest of the time or what ?”

“Nah, you know you’re my baby Jesus and I love you to bits but you’re also grumpy little Isak. But these days, you’re very… yeah, nice. You didn’t get mad when I got home last night and made all that noise, this morning you let me rest against you, you offer to get me aspirin, you’re smiling all the time, and also yesterday I heard you humming Isak. Humming !! It’s… weird.”

“Wow, thanks a lot Eskild…” Isak huffed, shaking his head in disbelief.

“It’s not just me ! Noora finds it suspicious too… right Noora ?”

“What ? I… Don’t you drag me into this Eskild” said Noora frowning at him.

“Okay, I see you’re all ganging up on me so, I’m gonna…” Isak got up from the couch and headed to his room.

“We’re not done with you Isak! I know something’s up and we’re gonna find out what it is !”

“There’s no we Eskild” Noora sighed, “Whatever’s making Isak happy is his business okay ?”

“You’re really no fun...” Eskild poutted, while sinking into the couch to get some more sleep.

Isak locked himself in his room and sat on his bed while letting out a deep sigh. So, what if he was in a good mood ? Couldn’t Eskild just leave him be for once ? But his annoyance quickly vanished as memories of Even’s came to his mind. And yes, maybe, that memory alone was enough to feel him with joy. But no one needed to know that.

Isak raised his hand to his face and let the tip of his fingers brush his lips. Yep, okay, he was smiling like an idiot.

.

As the new week went by, Isak began feeling kind of restless and frustrated, he had the strange impression that something was missing. 

Even. Even was missing.

He just couldn’t get him out of his mind. Even was the first person he thought of when he woke up in the morning, he was in Isak’s constant daydreaming, and as soon as he closed his eyes at night, Isak could see him, as if Even’s face was printed behind his eyelids.

Isak felt ridiculous but it was more and more difficult to fight this feeling.

He wanted to see him again.

Thursday came. As usual, Isak finished class early and headed to the tram stop to go home. As he waited, more and more people gathered around him, but he didn’t pay them any attention, completely lost in his own thoughts. The tram arrived and stopped before him. Isak saw people moving all around him, getting in and out, but he couldn’t move. He was in the way, some people had to get round him and he knew he should just get in the tram and go home already but he stayed still. When the tram left and it was all quiet around him again, Isak finally started walking in the same direction he went the week before, without even thinking about it.

Before he knew it, he was standing under the bright billboard and contemplating the big red letters, his heart pounding in his chest. He stood there for a while debating whereas he should go in or not, trying to calm his nerves telling himself it was fine, Even would probably not remember him anyway, but also feeling instantly sad at that idea.

Finally, Isak took a deep breath and went in. 

.

Just like the week before, the cinema was almost empty at that early hour. Isak walked toward the ticket office and stopped when he saw Even behind the desk. He felt his knees going weak and his heat racing. Even was looking down at a book, and for a moment Isak thought that he should just go before he could see him.

Even looked up and Isak stopped breathing for a moment. When he saw Isak, Even's entire face lit up and he gave him one of those smiles he had been dreaming of all week long. He was even more handsome than in his memories.

"Hei, you're back !"

"Yeah, hei" Isak chuckled, "I was in the neighborhood so I thought…"

I was in the neighborhood? What the fuck Isak…

"Well I'm very glad" said Even, his eyes not leaving Isak's.

"So um…" Isak looked down feeling himself blushing under Even's gaze "anything good playing today?"

"Ah yes !" Even exclaimed "Today you are in for a treat! I had to press my boss for weeks until he gave up and accepted to have this screening. It's my all time favourite, Baz Luhrmann's Romeo + Juliet!"

"You're serious?!" Isak asked.

"Yeah, I am why?"

"I don't know, after what you made me watch last week I just didn't expect that to be your favourite film. Isn't kind of... sappy?"

"What? Sappy?! Oh my god Isak, you're breaking my heart" Even said bringing his hands to his chest.

Isak knew he was joking but couldn't help his own heart to skip a beat upon hearing those words.

"This is the greatest love story of all times! And Baz Luhrmann tells it in the most epic way." Isak was getting a little bit flustered at Even's show of passion. "But maybe you can't handle it..." Even finally said with a teasing grin.

"Excuse me ?" Isak snapped back, "You think I can't handle freaking Romeo and Juliet ? Please…" he scoffed.

Even laughed and - wow - Isak wasn't sure he could handle that .

"Okay then" Even said tilting his head on the side, a playful smile on his lips "show me how well you handle the most tragic love story ever written."

He slid the ticket on the desk and let his hand linger there, an almost defiant look in his eyes, until Isak had no choice but to brush against Even's fingers to take it.

.

Again, there weren't a lot of people in the screening room. Isak took a seat but he couldn't stay still. He kept fidgeting, buzzing with excitement after having talked with Even again. He kept seeing him, his hands to his chest, looking at Isak pretending to be heartbroken and it was surely the most beautiful sight he had ever contemplated…

The movie seemed a bit strange to Isak at first but actually not as bad as he thought and, well young Leo was fine enough to pique his interest. When he heard Des’ree Kissing you, he couldn’t help his mind wander to the boy sitting behind his ticket desk, just a few meters away, and what he would do for just a single kiss from him.

A few minutes later, as Romeo sneaked back to the Capulet’s house after their party to see his beloved Juliet again, Isak was startled by someone sitting down right next to him. He turned his head and froze when he saw Even, his smile beaming even in the darkness of the theater. Even leaned towards Isak and whispered in his ear “I’m on a break, so I thought I would come and watch a bit of the film”.

Isak felt Even’s breath against his skin, the warmth of Even’s body against his own, making him shiver. His heart was beating so strong and fast, he wondered if Even could hear it over the sound of the movie. He was only able to stutter “Um… o-okay, cool…”

Even was still leaning a bit towards Isak, their shoulder touching and it was already making it very difficult for Isak to keep some kind of composure when suddenly, Even grabbed Isak’s forearm that was laying on the armrest between them and said in an excited whisper “Oh! That’s my favourite scene!”

On the screen, Romeo and Juliet were declaring their everlasting love for each other floating in a swimming pool and promising to meet the next day to get married, but all Isak could think about was the burning feeling of Even’s skin against his own. He glanced towards Even and saw him mouthing every line, his beautiful lips moving to the words of Shakespeare.

At the end of the scene, Even let out a content sigh and squeezed Isak’s arm gently before whispering in his ear again “I have to get back to work, enjoy the rest of the movie.”

He got up and went out as quietly as he came, leaving Isak a little bit short of breath, his heart still beating like a drum. For a moment, he wasn’t able to think about anything else but the lingering presence of Even beside him but as he was able to concentrate on the movie again, he found himself being a lot more invested in the destiny of the two lovers than he was in the beginning.

.

He left the room a bit shaken, even if he already knew how the story would end and tried to compose himself before he would see Even. He found him right there in the corridor, leaning against a wall, looking like he was waiting for him.

“Hey” Even approached him “so, did you like ? You can tell me if you didn’t it’s okay I’d understand…”

“No I…” Isak cleared his throat “I did. I liked it, really”

“Did you… Isak did you cry ?” Even grinned.

“What ?!” Isak scoffed “Of course not!”

“Yes you did”, Even was looking into his eyes and Isak felt as if he could see right into his soul.

Even raised his hand and ever so lightly ran his thumb along the trace left by a tear on Isak’s cheek. The touch was so soft, so intimate, it made Isak a little dizzy.

“See, I told you you couldn’t handle it” Even said teasingly with a wink.

Isak chuckled and rolled his eyes playfully.

“So, why do you love this movie so much?” he asked.

“Well, I think it is amazing Luhrmann’s was able to transpose Shakespeare’s exact words in twenty century American west-coast and it still made perfect sense you know ? This love story is so epic, so beautiful it transcends time and space…”

“As if it was existing in parallel universes.” Isak continued.

“Parallel universes ?” Even asked, curious.

“Have you never thought of that ?” Isak asked.

“No not really I…. oh shit.”

“What’s wrong ?” Isak asked.

“My boss is signaling me to get back to work. Sorry…”

“No of course, I have to go too so…”

“But you’ll have to tell me more about parallel universes next time, yeah ?” Even smiled, walking backwards to not lose sight of Isak, while he was getting away.

“Okay, yeah. Next time…”

.

Isak walked back home, two words resonating in his mind. Two words that filled him with hope, desire and joy. Two words that felt like a promise. Just two simple words.

Next time .

Chapter Text

On saturday, Isak joined Eskild and Noora to their local pub for a “roomies night out” as Eskild liked to call it. The place was packed, filled with loud voices and laughter, alcohol was flowing and it didn’t take long for Isak to feel comfortably tipsy. He was relaxed and a little bit dizzy, both from the several beers he had already drank and from the bliss that hadn’t left him since he had left Even two days before.

Even . As soon as his name crossed Isak’s mind, he forgot about everything and everyone around him. Noora’s voice became a distant buzz and the faces of the people in the pub disappeared in a blur, only leaving place in Isak’s thoughts for his face, for his voice, for Even.

“Isak ? Isak !” Noora’s voice brought him back to reality.

“Mmmh? What ?”

“Did you listen to anything I just said ?”

“Um… no sorry I think I zoned out for a moment…”

“You do that a lot these days” said Eskild, a suspicious look on his face “you look miles away, gazing out the window with a weird smile on your face… What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours ?” 

“Nothing” Isak scoffed “I don’t…”

“Come on, you can tell us ! Is it a boy ? I’m sure it’s a boy ! Is it ?”

"Maybe…" said Isak coyly, blushing as he looked down at his now empty glass.

"Ha ! I knew it !" Eskild exclaimed and jumped off his chair "Wait for me, I wanna know everything !" he shouted as he made his way to the bar.

He was back not even five minutes later with three full glasses. He put the right order in front of each of them and then turned to Isak, looking at him intently.

"Okay, spill it. Who is he ?"

"Eskild ! What kind of questioning is that ?" Noora scolded him.

“Okay okay, sorry, but I’m just so excited for our little Issy !”

Isak would normally feel uncomfortable being in the center of that kind of attention but as he watched his friends jokingly quarreling over him, Eskild waving his arms with excitement, Noora frowning in a mocked reprimand, he actually felt his heart grow warmer.

Eskild and Noora went quiet when they heard Isak say tentatively, “His name is Even…”

They both turned to him and listened attentively as he told them about his two visits to the cinema where Even worked, Eskild squeaking when Isak recalled the touch of Even’s hand on his cheek, Noora smiling at him, her bright red lips turned into a beautiful and loving smile. 

“Aaand… ? Did you kiss ?” Eskild asked after Isak went quiet.

“No, he.. he had to go back to work and I went home.”

“But, did you give him your number or something ?”

“No…”

“Urgh ! My baby Isak you’re killing me !” Eskild shook his head dramatically.

“Don’t listen to him…” Noora rolled her eyes at Eskild “This is good, I mean, he clearly wants to see you again, right ?”

“I don’t know… Maybe he was just being polite ? And I don’t even know if he likes me like that… ”

“Oh come on ! Stop putting yourself down, of course he wants to see you again !” Eskild exclaimed and grabbed Isak by the shoulders “And from what you told us, he does seem to like you, right Noora ?” 

“Yes, absolutely !” she nodded as she gave Isak a comforting smile.

“What if it’s just me projecting ? I mean, I don’t really know much about him, maybe he’s just always friendly that way…”

“Well, I guess you’re just gonna have to return there and find out” Eskild said grinning.

“Yeah, you’re right…” Isak smiled.

He felt Noora squeeze his hand gently as he let his mind wander again to the blue eyed boy he couldn’t wait to see again. 

Next time…

.

The following week went by incredibly slowly. It seemed like hours were stretching into endless days. Isak tried to concentrate on his classes and to keep his mind occupied but as if his brain had been replaced by a ticking clock, all he could think about was the neverending countdown to his next encounter with Even.

When thursday morning - finally - came, Isak jumped out of bed as soon as his alarm went off. He had spent almost the entire night thinking about what he would say to Even, running every possible scenario of their next conversation. He almost didn’t sleep at all and yet he was bursting with energy.

He spent a ridiculous amount of time deciding what to wear, trying every combination to find the outfit that would make him look nice without showing too obviously that he had made an effort. He finally decided on a dark pair of jeans and a forest green buttoned-up shirt that his friend Eva always said brought out his eyes. Then he locked himself in the bathroom, grumbling at his reflection in the mirror as he tried to tame his unruly curls, until Eskild started knocking at the door.

“Isaaaak hurry up, I have to get ready for work ! What’s taking you so lo…” Isak opened the door, interrupting Eskild who then looked at him up and down “Ooh. You look good !”

“You think so ? Not too…”

“Nah…” Eskild said softly as he rolled Isak’s sleeves up his forearms “It’s perfect” he continued and gave Isak a knowing wink. 

Isak grabbed his backpack, a jacket, he put on his shoes and took a deep breath before heading out of the apartment. As he closed the door, he heard Eskild shouting, “Good luck baby Jesus !”

.

Isak didn’t hear a word his professor said on the last hour of class, his voice covered by the deafening sound of the clock in the room taunting Isak with each excruciatingly long second.

Tik tok, tik tok…

The class finally over, Isak stormed out of the room and almost ran to the cinema, butterflies swirling in his stomach. When he arrived in front of the building, he had to stop a moment to catch his breath and calm his hammering heart.

A soon as he got inside, he noticed that there were more people in the cinema than the two previous weeks, a line forming in front of the ticket office preventing him from seeing who was sitting behind it. When the first people in the line move aside with their tickets, everyone walked a few steps forward, unblocking the view to the desk. Isak released a shaky breath when he saw Even at his usual spot, looking even more handsome than ever, if that was even possible.

For once, Even didn’t see him right away and Isak took advantage of being hidden in the small crowd to observe him discreetly, as Even smiled and exchanged a few words with each customer. His heart clenched when he saw a girl leaning against the counter, obviously trying to flirt with him, but when she turned around after taking a few steps away from him, Isak saw the disappointment in the girl’s eyes as she realized Even had moved on to the next person in line. Isak couldn't help a small smile creeping on the corner of his lips.

His turn finally came and when Even laid his eyes on Isak, his face lit up with a huge smile. Isak was sure he hadn’t seen him give this kind of smile to anybody else and felt his heart quicken at that thought.

“Halla ! It’s nice to see you, I was hoping you’d come today…”

“Hei, um… you were ?” Isak felt his cheeks warm up with a blush.

“Yeah of course.” Even said, his eyes locked on Isak’s.

Isak cleared his throat to try and compose himself and looked around him.

“So I guess your boss didn’t let you choose the film programed today…”

“What do you mean ?” Even asked frowning.

“Well, there’s a lot more people than usual !” Isak teased him.

“How dare you ?! People come from all across Oslo for my impeccable movie recommendations !”

“I’m sure they do…”

“Well, I got you to come back didn’t ?”

For your impeccable movie recommendations, right…

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anybody you loved Romeo + Juliet, it can be our secret” Even said grinning and Isak had to stop himself with every force he had not to jump over the desk and cover Even’s smile with his lips.

“So… what’s playing today ?”

Even’s eyes sparkled with excitement as he answered “A classic amongst the classics ! Hence all those people... Have you ever seen Casablanca ?”

“Um no…”

“Then you’re lucky ! Most people have only seen an old shaky version on television, you’re gonna discover it remastered on a big screen. There’s action, and love and drama... also Bogart and Bergman ? Phew… It’s perfect.”

You’re perfect… So fucking perfect.

Isak took the ticket Even gave him, his hand always lingering for a second too long. Then, when he headed to the screening room, he couldn’t help stopping for a moment and, like the girl before him, he turned around to look at Even, only this time, Even was looking back.

.

Isak really enjoyed Casablanca , but as soon as the film ended, he was the first person up on his feet and heading toward the lobby. But when he got there, he couldn’t see Even. People where already lining up for the next movie but behind the desk of the ticket office, there was a young woman he already caught sight of in the cinema, instead of Even.

He thought he must have gone on a break and lingered in the lobby, pretending to read the movie critics that were stuck up on the walls and flipping through random leaflets for cultural institutions and events around Oslo, lying on a display stand.

After a little while he walked up to the woman at the ticket office and said shyly, “Hei, sorry um… I’m looking for Even ?”

She glanced at him before turning back to her next customer and replied “Yeah, Even already left, sorry…”

“Oh, okay…” he felt his heart sunk in his chest.

Isak slowly headed toward the door, he couldn’t believe this was it, after a week of waiting and building expectations. Well, maybe Even didn’t really wanted to see him after all… He went out in the street and walked toward the tram with a heavy heart and thoughts jostling around in his head.

“Isak !”

He turned around and there, was Even. Isak froze as he watched Even catch up to him in a few big an lithe steps. Had he been… waiting for him ?

“I… I thought you’d left.” he stuttered.

“Yeah I finished early today… but I couldn’t possibly leave without hearing your take on Casablanca .” Even said playfully.

“Right…” Isak chuckled “ You , needed to hear what I have to say about Casablanca ?”

“Of course.” Even shrugged as if it made obvious sense, “Do you have time for coffee ?”

“Yeah, sure…” Isak felt his heart skip a beat as Even gave him the most beaming smile before guiding him to the nearest coffee shop, just a short walk away from the cinema.

.

They sat down at a table near a large window. Isak watched Even, who was obviously a regular here,  as he joked with the barista who took their order. They stayed silent, observing each other for a moment, until she brought them their drinks. Isak took the warm cup between his hands, his palms getting a little bit damp, both from the heat of his coffee and the exhilaration of finally being alone with Even.

“So…” Isak said after another minute of glances and small smiles between sips of coffee, “You really have a thing for thwarted love stories don’t you ?”

Even laughed, his head tilting back revealing his long pale neck and Isak felt a shiver run through his body.

“Yeah well, what can I say ? Tragic love stories make the most beautiful works of art… I mean Casablanca would not be this gut-wrenching masterpiece if Rick and Ilsa ran off into the sunset together at the end you know ? Letting Ilsa go was the most powerful proof of love Rick could have ever given her…”

“Mmmh that’s true…” Isak said softly, not trusting his voice not to betray his emotion after hearing Even talking to him about love, “But that scene was still fucking sad.”

“Awww did you cry again ?” Even teased him.

“Fuck off !” Isak chuckled “I didn’t cry, I had… allergies… or something.”

“Yeah right, whatever you say tough guy...” Even laughed as Isak felt his cheeks blush lightly, “So, did you liked it ?”

“Yeah… well it wasn’t Transformers I guess but it was okay.”

“Okay, that’s it. You are forever banned from my cinema.” Even said as he shook his head in pretend outrage.

They continued their banter for a while and then talked about nothing and everything, their families, their friends, Isak told him about how he’d lived in a flatshare since high school and was relieved to see nothing but understanding in Even’s eyes, not an ounce of the pity he was always afraid of getting when opening up about his family problems. He felt completely at ease, as if they’d known each other forever. They exchanged their phone numbers and Isak felt comforted knowing he wouldn’t have to wait another painfully long week before talking to Even again. Even told him about his dream of one day becoming a filmmaker and observed Isak intensely as he talked about the infinity of parallel universes.

It was so easy, so evident.

.

“So you… you look nice today.” Even suddenly said with a slightly mischievous look sparkling in his eyes.

Isak was never good at taking a compliment and he felt a wave of doubt creeping through him. He thought he had maybe overdone it, misread everything, he felt overdressed and self conscious about Even thinking, knowing , that it was all for him. Before he could stop himself he shrugged and said, “Yeah I have a… um, well something, later, so…”

What the… ?!

“Oh. Okay, that’s nice.” Even replied softly, his smile slightly faltering on his lips.

No, no, no, no, no… Fuck, Isak you bloody idiot !

As Isak was about to say something they were both startled by a few knocks on the window next to them. They turned their heads and Isak saw a beautiful young woman with blond hair and big green eyes, waving at Even. When she caught his eyes, she winked at him playfully and gestured through the glass to indicate that she was going to meet him inside.

They waited, not saying anything, until the silence was broken by the little bell above the front door. A few seconds later, the girl was sliding on the seat next to Even and planted a big kiss on his cheek, almost on the corner of his lips. 

“Hey you, there you are !” She exclaimed as she let her head rest on Even’s shoulder.

Isak looked down at his coffee cup as he felt his heart sunk in his chest.

Of course…

He tilted his head back up when he heard Even clear his throat, “Sonja, this is Isak, Isak this is um… Sonja.”

She looked at him with a bright and friendly smile, and Isak reluctantly shook the hand she was holding out across the table.

“So, you remember we have dinner at Elias’ tonight ?” Sonja turned to Even “He asked me if we could bring something to drink… I’m gonna go home and have a quick shower but maybe you can pick me up around 19:00 and buy some wine on your way ?”

Isak observed her as she was leaning against Even, taking small sips of coffee in his cup and Isak was growing more and more uncomfortable.

They look so beautiful together… he thought.

When she raised a hand to tuck a loose strand of Even’s hair behind his ear, Isak felt his heart breaking into a million pieces in his chest and suddenly stood up fearing he wouldn’t be able to hide his turmoil much longer.

“I think I’m gonna head out...” he cleared his throat to steady his trembling voice, “I don’t want to keep you, you have plans and I also have um… you know my… thing, tonight, so… It was very nice to meet you Sonja. Even, I’ll see you around.”

He grabbed his bag and his jacket as Even and Sonja said their goodbye. He couldn’t handle looking into Even’s eyes so he just walked away, holding his breath until he was outside of the coffee shop.

.

As he was heading back home, he felt his phone buzzing in his pocket. He unlock it and felt his heart clenching when he saw that he received a text from Even. On his screen, the famous last line of Casablanca,

Isak, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

The message soon became blurry as Isak felt his eyes fill with tears.

Chapter Text

When Isak got home, the kollektiv was quiet. Eskild was still at work and when he stepped into the living room, Isak found Noora reading a magazine, half lying on the couch. When she heard Isak, Noora looked up at him and frowned.

She saw his eyes, red from tears, his low shoulders and the defeated look on in face. In a single look, she knew. Noora let out a soft sigh and sat up, discarding her magazine on the side. Without a word, she made room next to her and held out her hand to Isak as he walked slowly to the couch. Isak curled up next to Noora and let his head rest on her thighs, closing his eyes as she gently ran her hand through his hair.

Isak knew he would talk to his roomates eventually. Even if it was difficult or if he felt that Eskild was pushing him, he knew that he would feel better, that they would listen and support him as they had done so consistently since he moved in with them. But right now, he was grateful for Noora knowing, understanding that he needed time and silence, before he could face his heartbreak.

The calm before the storm Eskild would surely bring home.

.

An hour or so later, Isak and Noora heard voices and laughter behind the door and soon, Eskild entered the flat with a guy they never saw before holding him with an arm around his waist.

“Okay, quickly this is the living room” Eskild giggled while gesturing toward the room, his eyes not leaving the guy, “Alex this is Noora, my roommate, Noora this is… Oh.”

His eyes finally landed on Noora and Isak. Eskild stood still for a moment before he turned back to Alex and said “And well it’s been great to meet you but I’m feeling pretty tired all of a sudden sooo… How about a raincheck eh ?”

The guy tried to protest but Eskild had pushed him back into the hallway and practically shoved him outside before he could say anything.

“You have my number right ? Alright, bye !!” Eskild said before closing the door and walking back to the living room.

“Hey baby Jesus, you okay ?” he asked softly.

“You didn’t have to do this Eskild” Isak said, “if you wanted to have your friend over, it’s alright.”

“Nah, he doesn’t matter.” Eskild shrugged, as he sat down on the coffee table in front of them. “So, what happened ?”

“Well I…” Isak hesitated, “I went for a movie, and then we had coffee because he had finished his shift early and… it was going really well…” Eskild and Noora nodded along as they listened to him attentively.

“But then I started to panic because I was sure he could see how gone I was for him and I made up some date or something I had later…”

“What ? Why would you do that ?!” Eskild exclaimed incredulously.

“I don’t know, I told you I panicked okay ? But it doesn’t matter anyway because right after that his girlfriend arrived and… yeah that’s it, so.”

“Oh no… I’m so sorry Isak.” Noora said, putting her hand on his arm.

“He has a girlfriend ? Really ?!” Eskild frowned.

“Yeah… your gaydar maybe flawless Eskild, but mine is apparently fucking broken.”

“But, you’re really sure she’s not just a friend or something ?” Noora asked tentatively.

“Yeah, you should have seen how she touched him, how close they were… And besides he texted me some Casablanca line about how we were gonna be such good friends so…”

“Oh yeah I know that one !” Eskild exclaimed, he then did his best impersonation of Humphrey Bogart and quoted “ Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship .”

“Eskild, that’s really not helping” Noora sighed.

“Right, sorry…”

She turned back to Isak and squeezed his hand gently “How are you feeling ?”

“Well, I’ve always thought he was probably just being friendly and didn’t like me like that so, I guess I was right…”

“What are you gonna do?” she asked.

“I don’t know, I’m not sure I can handle being his friend…” Isak whispered, leaning against Noora to let his head rest on her shoulder.

She wrapped her arm around him for a hug as Eskild stood up to go to the kitchen. He came back a moment later with an ice cream pot and a bottle of vodka.

“Alright, scoot over”

Soon Isak was wrapped between his two roommates and under a blanket, drowning his heartbreak in alcohol and sugar.

.

Friday went by in a blur. Isak spent the entire day fighting the nausea resulting after a night of only drinking cheap vodka and eating ice cream. His brain couldn’t function, overwhelmed by a pounding sensation. Isak was feeling like shit but at least he didn’t think about Even, his entire energy and concentration being focused on making it through the day and finally going home.

That is, until he felt his phone buzz and saw Even’s name appear on his screen. Suddenly, he felt even more light-headed and he had to take a couple of long deep breath before unlocking his phone. It was a short and simple message but still, Isak felt his pulse racing as he read it, his fingers trembling as he texted Even back.

Hi Isak, it’s Even (from the cinema) ! How are you ?

Pretty hangovered actually.

Oh shit…

It take your “thing” yesterday was fun ?

Yeah, it was...

How was your dinner ?

Good ! I was with friends back from high school, it was really nice.

Okay.

So… Do you have plans this weekend ?

Um yeah… I’m pretty busy, actually.

Okay… well, I hope you feel better soon and, have a good weekend then.

Yeah, you too.

.

Isak spent the entire weekend sulking in the kollektiv. Once his brain was finally free from his alcoholic fog, Isak couldn’t help but think only of Even, missing him every minute.

As the days passed, Even continued to send him nice, friendly texts, to which Isak always answered vaguely, until he received the message he was dreading.

So… will I see you on thursday ? Are you coming for a movie ?

Um… no sorry. I have too much work to do, I have to study.

Oh, okay. 

Well anyway, see you soon, I hope…

Isak could feel the Even’s disappointment, and he knew he wasn’t being fair ignoring him like that, but what he told Noora was true, he knew he couldn’t handle only being Even’s friend. And he figured it was better to hurt Even’s feelings a little bit, than to end up with his own heart completely shattered.

But it was hard, he missed him. And on thursday afternoon, when he took the tram home instead of walking to the cinema as he had done so for the past three weeks, it was almost unbearable. Painful. As if his body knew he wasn’t supposed to be here in the kollektiv, but in a small movie theater across town, near Even.

. 

Another week passed, and Isak was missing him a little it more every day. Even hadn’t text him for a while, and Isak thought he was probably letting go. Until the next thursday night came.

You know I was joking when I told you you were forever banned from my cinema, right ?

Yeah, right… couldn’t make it again, sorry.

Just kidding, don’t worry.

But I did miss you today, though.

Isak felt his heart clenching his his chest. He wanted to answer that he missed him too, that he was thinking about him every minute of every day and that it was driving him mad.

But he couldn’t.

.

When the weekend came, Noora decided that it was enough. Isak had to get out of their flat, talk to people and try to get his mind off Even. So she took him to a Halloween party with her friends from Uni, after Isak protested saying that he didn’t want to go, that he didn’t know anybody, that he didn’t have a costume and didn’t want to meet new people anyway.

But Noora was having none of it and after managing to come up with a half decent costume with some help from Eskild, she dragged him out of the kollektiv and to one of her classmates’ apartment near campus.

The place was packed. When they went in, Isak was overwhelmed by the loud music, the smell of alcohol mixed with sweat and weed. Everybody was wearing weird costumes and masks, making it impossible for him so see any familiar face in the crowd.

Noora introduced him to some of her friends and classmates and then encouraged him to try and mingle as she started dancing with a few other girls from her class.

After a few drinks, Isak was relaxed enough to talk to a few people, but it was always the same boring tune, “What’s your costume ? Who do you know here ? So what do you study ? Small talk, blah blah blah…” .

Well, those people weren’t so bad, and some of them would probably prove to be a lot more interesting  that he thought, but the truth is, there was only one person he wanted to be with and talk to at that moment.

Before he could help himself, he had unlocked his phone and opened his conversation with Even and sent a shy and tentative Hei , thinking he would probably not get an answer. It was saturday night, Even had probably better things to do than to chat with the guy who had been basically ignoring him for the past two weeks. But merely seconds after, Isak felt his heart quickened as he saw Even typing back.

Hei.

Halla !

It’s nice to hear from you :)

How are you ?

Good! I’m at a Halloween party… what are you up to ?

Same actually.

Having fun ?

Um… not really no. I don’t know any people here, my roommate dragged me to this party but I don’t even know where she is now. You ?

I’m here with a few friends but I don’t know, I’m kind of bored to be honest…

Well aren’t we two buzzkill.

hahaha, true.

Do you maybe want to meet ? At least we’d be bored together :)

Um, yeah, okay.

Five minutes and a few texts later, Isak was walking out the apartment and towards Even’s. This was probably a bad idea, Isak knew that. This time apart from Even didn’t make him like him less, or want him less, in fact it was the complete opposite. And he knew he couldn’t have him. But he missed Even, and Even had told him he missed him too. And the alcohol having taken some of his inhibition and prudence away, he decided that he would let himself have this.

If friendship was all he could get from Even, then fuck it, he would take that.

.

Even wasn't living very far from the party Isak were at, but still the short walk in the cold air had been enough to sober him up. When he found himself knocking on Even's door, he felt a rise of panic and was ready to turn away and run back home, when the door swung open.

The first thing he saw was Even’s deep blue eyes, looking right back into his own. Isak was frozen for a moment, speechless under the intensity of Even’s gaze. When his eyes crinkled, Isak realized Even was smiling at him and he was brought back to reality as he heard his voice.

“Halla, Isak.”

“Um… Hei.”

Isak’s nervousness was washed away when he finally looked at Even completely and realized he was still in his Halloween costume. Isak couldn’t help bursting out laughing.

“What are you laughing at ?” Even asked, pretending to be offended.

“Faen, what are you supposed to be ?” Isak asked when he managed to calm his fit of laughter.

“Can’t you tell ? I’m God !”

“God ?! No less eh…” Isak teased him. 

“Speak for yourself Julius Caesar…”

“Well, at least you can recognize who I’m dressed up as ! I’m sorry but you just look like a creepy old man…”

“Yeah um…” Even seemed to blush a little under the big white beard, and hesitated before he continued “It made more sense with my costume partner but I kind of… ditched… my angel. So…”

“Oh.”

Isak didn’t know what to say, didn’t know what that meant. Was he talking about Sonja ? God and an angel did sound like a cheesy couple costume but he couldn’t have just ditched his girlfriend to hang out with Isak instead, however bored he was at that party. Could he ?

They stood silent for a moment, Isak’s gaze travelling around the corridor until he heard Even clear his throat and say, “Do you um… wanna come in ?”

He looked a little bit nervous, bouncing on the ball of his feet and Isak could help his heart but swell with fondness. He nodded and Even’s face lit up with the brightest smile before he moved aside, allowing Isak to enter his flat.

Isak walked in the small one bedroom apartment and looked all around him at the walls covered with movie posters and art. Isak smiled as he took in his surroundings, the place looked so much like Even. He moved closer to look at cartoons and drawings that were pinned up a wall.

“Did you draw these ?” he asked.

“Yeah…”

“They’re good.”

“You think so ?” He heard a smile in Even’s voice behind him.

“Yeah, the cartoons are really funny…”

When Isak turned around, he realized Even had gotten rid of the big white synthetic hair and beard of his God costume. His heart skipped a beat when he saw him, really saw him, his golden hair, his high cheekbones, the full pink lips Isak was dying of feeling against his skin. Isak realized just how much he'd missed seeing Even's beautiful face these last few weeks.

Isak looked down as he felt a blush burning his cheeks. To create a distraction from his turmoil, he turned to the shelves containing Even's huge DVD collection. He stood there, his mouth agape as he studied the jackets and realized how many movies he’d never heard of, movies from all over the world, from silent cinema until contemporary films. An entire unknown universe. Even’s.

“Do you wanna watch something ?” Even asked. “It’d be nice to watch a film, together , for a change…” he continued, almost shyly.

“Yeah, okay. “ Isak smiled, trying not to let his emotion get carried away by the sound of this innocent word, together , “But I guess I’ll let you choose it”

Isak observed Even as he studied his collection, pinching his chin between his thumb and forefinger, his brows furrowed, as if the decision he was about to make was of the utmost importance. He hummed as he let his eyes wander across the shelves.

“Let’s see… it’s Halloween, so how about something scary ?” He turned toward and winked, a mischievous smile on his lips.

Isak hated that kind of movies, he always got way too frightened. One time he couldn’t sleep for days after watching a horror film with Jonas, startled by every single sound he could hear around him as soon as it got dark. But he couldn’t admit that to Even, so instead he just shrugged and said “Okay, sure…”.

“Ah, there !” Even exclaimed, “Have ever seen The Shining ?”

No, I haven’t because that looks fucking terrifying !

“Um no, I don’t think so…”

“Okay, that’s settled then !”

.

They sat on the small couch in front of the TV. Isak was feeling a little bit nervous, by the prospect of watching something he knew would make him terribly uncomfortable, but also because of the proximity of his and Even’s body. He was suddenly very aware of every movement Even made, of his scent, of the warmth that was radiating from him. Isak was feeling his heart racing in his chest and hopped Even couldn’t hear how shaky he breath had become.

The movie got intense and creepy very fast and Isak grew more and more tense. When Danny, the little boy rode his bike down the long and claustrophobic corridors of the hotel, Isak started fidgeting, feeling something bad was gonna happen, and that’s when he met the spirit of the two girls that were killed in the hotel ten years before. 

Isak couldn’t help letting out a shuddering breath.

“You’re okay ?” Even asked, and as he did, put his hand on Isak’s arm.

Isak hummed weakly, not trusting his voice not to reveal the even deeper turmoil he was in now that Even was touching him.

“Fuck, you’re trembling… come here.” Even said as he opened his arm for Isak.

“What ? No, I’m fine”

“Just come here.”

Isak didn’t resist and let Even wrap his arms around him. He relaxed against Even, the sound of his breath and the beating of his heart soothing him. He closed his eyes for a second and let himself have this, this moment when he felt nothing else existed outside of their little bubble. Even if Even belonged to someone else, Isak could at least have this moment.

Isak began tensing up again later in the film, as Jack entered the terrible room 237. When the beautiful young naked woman he met there turned into the rotting corpse of an old lady in a grotesque and nightmarish scene, Isak couldn’t help curling up against Even and hid his face against his chest.

“Fuuuck that’s so fucking creepy I can’t…” he whined, his voice muffled against Even’s tee-shirt.

“Do you want me to stop the film ?” Even asked, rubbing his back gently.

“Yes please…”

When the room went silent, Isak let out a small sigh and looked up at Even, “I’m sorry...” he said and scrunched up his nose, a little embarrassed.

“It’s alright” Even shook his head softly and smiled, his eyes not leaving Isak’s.

Isak thought Even would let him go now that he didn’t need to make him feel better, to reassure him, but instead, he felt Even’s arms hold him a little bit tighter, pressing their body even closer together. Isak let his hand rest on Even’s chest, feeling his heartbeat quickened under his touch. Even leaned down until their faces were so close Isak could feel Even’s breath against his skin. Even raised a hand, cupping Isak’s cheek and brushing it softly with his thumb, his eyes only left Isak’s to follow the movement of his lips, parting in surprise. 

Even closed the distance between them, his mouth meeting Isak’s in a tender kiss, almost tentative at first, before Isak let out a small content sigh and moved his lips in response. Isak felt a shiver run through his entire body, his skin burning everywhere Even was touching him. It was everything he had dreamed of for weeks and more, so much more.

When they parted, Even let his forehead rest against Isak’s and whispered “I’ve wanted this for so long…”

Isak felt his heart swell at the confirmation that he had not imagined it, that for all this time, Even had wanted him as he wanted Even. But soon, another realization crept up on him and he looked down, not daring to meet Even’s eyes when he asked, “But what about your girlfriend ? What about… Sonja ?” he couldn’t hold the bitterness in his voice as he said her name.

“Hey…” Even said as he lifted Isak’s face to look him in the eyes, his brows furrowed “Sonja’s not my girlfriend.”

“She’s not ?”

“No !” Even chuckled and Isak felt a wave of relief flood through him.

“But… you seemed so close, I tought…”

“We are, she’s my best friend. We actually dated for a while when we were fifteen or something… but we realized very quickly we were better as friends. And that’s what we’ve been ever since, just friends.”

Even stroked Isak’s chin ever so softly before he continued “But you, God, I’ve wanted you since the moment I first saw you…”

“But… why texting me about friendship and all that day, remember ?”

“Because I…” Even scoffed, “I didn’t think you felt the same way I did... I was so excited to finally get to know you that day, I fucking begged by boss to let me finish earlier so I could try and spend more time with you... and you were so fucking handsome that day but then you said you had somewhere to be and I realized… there was, there had to be someone else. But I… I just couldn’t stay away so...”

“There isn’t someone else ! There wasn’t, I just… I panicked like an idiot because I was afraid you’d see how gone I was for you when we barely knew each other. Fuck…”

Even shook his head and burst out laughing before he took Isak’s face and pulled him into a passionate kiss. There was no hesitation this time, no shyness. They let their passion, their hunger for each other show, lips crashing against the others, tongues swirling avidly, as if they needed to make up for all this time lost.

When they parted only to catch their breath, Even panted “I can’t believe we almost missed out on that…”

“Yeah, I know… we really are fucking hopeless” Isak laughed.

.

They spent all night just like that, bundle up in each other’s arms, opening their heart to the other, kissing, kissing and kissing again, until their lips were swollen and their heads dizzy. Until the night turned into day and the first rays of sunshine pierced through Even’s yellow curtains.

.

Isak walked home in the early morning. The streets of Oslo were quiet, most people still sleeping like on any other sunday morning. Isak had not slept a wink but he didn’t feel tired, one the contrary. He felt like running, like screaming on the top of his lungs, like dancing and laughing. He wanted to knock on people’s door and wake them up only to let them know how happy he was.

He’d just go to his place when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He smiled, knowing who it was before he even looked at the screen.

Even had sent him a video, the last scene from a movie called Cinema Paradiso .

Before he even watched it, Isak felt his heart swell with tenderness, the title alone telling so much, as if it had been made for them. He pressed play and saw a man sitting alone in a small cinema, a film being projected just for him. The man watched the screen in awe as he discovered a montage of kissing scenes from old black and white films. Soft and deep kisses, shy and passionate kisses, kisses of joy or filled with tears, lips barely brushing and strong embraces…

Isak’s smile was now so wide it was hurting his cheeks. He felt tears filling his eyes as he closed the video and came back to their conversation. There, he found another message from Even.

I have seen a thousand movie kisses, but nothing compares to the touch of you lips…

Isak let himself fall on his bed, clutching his phone against his chest, feeling his heart beating like a wild drum.

This wasn’t a film. This wasn’t a happy ending. This was the beginning of something real and beautiful, and Isak couldn’t wait for the next thousand movie nights, the next thousand coffee dates… The next thousand kisses.