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Published:
2019-06-10
Updated:
2019-06-28
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4,122
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3/?
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Kill or Die

Summary:

Some unlinked thoughts

Chapter 1: Bellamy’s state of mind during his paralysis between 605 & 606

Chapter 2 : Clarke waking up in her brain

Chapter 3 : bellamy and Clarke outside Sanctum after 608

Chapter 1: WHO ARE YOU

Chapter Text

WHO ARE YOU? And The Horror That Followed

His fall did not hurt him, his nerves had gone numb too fast to register any pain. What did hurt was her fall. His friend, his co-leader, now lost.

And in her place stood a woman he did not know. Her eyes had lost that small tinge of sadness that seemed to be her constant companion in all situations. That should've been the tell; she was too carefree, too 'chilled out' to be Clarke. He had taken way too long to understand. Or perhaps, simply to admit.

She leaned over him now, nonchalantly answering his question "Josephine Lightbourne. Nice to meet you". Never had meeting someone shattered his world so. Things still did not add up in his mind, questions flowed like unbridled water. Yet, one thing was clear, beyond doubt.

It wasn't her.
She was gone.
He had lost her, again.

And, if that wasn't enough to wrench his heart like a stress ball in a fat, overworked palm, he had seen what they might have done to her.

Flashes from the video logs hehad seen in the afternoon ran through his mind as that woman in Clarke's body dragged his paralysed form to a corner. He remembered; the "host body" losing its original consciousness, almost dying before ultimately being taken over by this very same apathetic creature who was now inhibiting Clarke.

And she must have gone through the same. Or worse.

"See you soon", said Josephine, starting to walk away from him. He wanted to scream. She couldn't possibly have anything good planned for the rest of his friends. But, even more than stopping her, he wanted to choke the life out of her.

With another painful palpitation of his heart, he was hit with the realization that he couldn't do that without killing Clarke herself, or at least her body. Tears welled up on his cheeks and his vision blurred.

Outside he could hear them whispering; the body-snatcher and her bodyguard. As he heard their voices fade away, he let go of the last shreds of self control. He let the tears flow, not that he could've done much to stop them. For once, he did not think ahead. He did not plan.

He lay there and he wept. The paralytic would fade away and then he’d think of a way to caution his friends. But this, it was the moment to mourn, to grieve for the friend he had lost all over again, the co-leader he’d once again started to lean on, the girl who claimed he was her family. Too important to her. He regretted it now, not having the courage to respond in kind when she had said that. And now he needed her to know it - her worth to him. She couldn’t possibly be gone without having known that.

And maybe she wasn’t. He had, once before thoughtt her dead and been proven wrong. What were the odds...

This was when he heard the door burst open and two lightly-armed guards walked through it. “Let’s get him outta here”, one of the guards hastily said.
“Easy, son”, the other responded, crouching down at some distance from Bellamy. “The earth-boy said we have so long as an hour before anyone starts noticing his absence”. Earth-boy? He wondered if they were threatening yet another of his friends and a wave of panic washed through him.
“He could be bluffing”, the younger guard proposed.
The comment drew a sardonic scoff from his senior, “Josephine doesn’t pick the weak-willed. She certainly doesn’t let them survive. The boy must’ve looked useful. Unlike this one”, he spoke the latter sentences, staring hard at Bellamy, who was frantically struggling to make sense of things.
“Is loyalty such a fickle thing on earth”, wondered the young guard as they finally picked up Bellamy’s limp body and carried him outside.
“So, it would appear”, said the other after some time as they threw him in the back of a covered wheelcart, after having first stuffed him into a body bag. Bellamy wanted to ask questions , to shout them out really. But all he could do was wonder. And now there was the added fear of death. He was fairly confident that these people were instructed to kill him. At best, they were going to stash him in a ditch outside Sanctum. But, apart from the basic, primal fear that all living creatures feel when their survival is threatened, he could not feel much sorrow.

He wondered if losing Clarke was a breaking point of sorts. A steep fall right after the recovery from a bad accident, bomb dropping on a city coping with the remnants of a famine. After everything he’d lost; his mother, numerous friends, his baby sister.

As one despairing thought followed another through his mind, he heard the zipper of his body bag slide down. Too soon, he thought with desperate helplessness, feeling the effect of the paralytic drug still very much upon him. However, the face that came into view did, at least, free him of that terror.
What the hell happened to you”, Octavia asked, leaning over him in concern, Diyoza some steps behind her.

Clarke died, he wanted to shout, to cry his heart out. Since he couldn’t yet do that, he simply let his tears do the talking.

Chapter 2: FROM THE ASHES SHE WILL RISE...

Summary:

What would Clarke do once she manages to subdue Josephine?

I wonder...

PS : this is NOT a continuation from chapter 1, sorry. It is more a continuation of 606

Notes:

Does not follow chapter 1 in content.

Bellamy is very much in Sanctum, though his rage hasn’t been brought under control yet, like in the show.

Lemme know if you wanna read a Bellarke reunion after this!

Chapter Text

FROM THE ASHES SHE WILL RISE...

She bolts upright in that unknown bed.

Recovering from breathlessness and a rapidly spinning head, she looks over her body. It is her alright. The traces of having been groomed by someone else are there, but the body belongs to her. She lets out a sigh and steps out of the blanket.

Her feet barely touch the floor when a sharp stab of pain hits her head. Her lungs run out of air as if she has received a heavy blow to the abdomen and she falls back down on the bed, taking, quick calming breaths of control.

“Get back down”, she hisses through clenched teeth, fury laced in her words. Then, a look of sheer determination comes into her eyes. She sits there, having another round of the brain battle, in the war she had managed to wage that night. She knows that she is strong enough to keep fighting. It is the winning where she’ll need a bit of help. But that is a matter for later.

Right now, she focuses all her energy on subduing this twinkly-eyed intruder. Clarke has managed to trap her in the same labyrinth of memories which was threatening to haunt her till infinity just about a few moments ago. She must now make sure that sweet, unrepentant Josephine stays that way till she can find a solution. Or her mother, or Madi, Or Bellamy. Basically whichever she can reach first.

With another attempt at jailbreak suppressed, Clarke hurriedly gets up from the bed and swings the bedroom door open. Outside, a tall, lean man awaits, his fist raised to knock. “Oh”, he says hoarsely in obvious surprise. Then composing himself, he gets to the point, ‘I heard you’d been given a body”, he says tentatively. Clarke can not place the man, she’s never seen him before. But he is clearly addressing Josephine so he cannot be less than a prime. Playing Josephine is probably her best shot of getting through him.

“Yeah, well. How can I help you?”, Clarke hasn’t learnt much about Josephine over the course of the two duels she’s fought against her, but one thing she took in quickly was the woman’s obvious apathetic detachment.

What she does not see coming is her guest’s reaction. “You can die”, he grits out as he grabs her throat between his hands and squeezes with the intent to choke the life out of her. “You do not deserve these chances one after the another, you murdering, spiteful...”, the man struggles to find words amidst his fury as Clarke struggles against his hold.

Finally, as her vision begins to blur, only one option presemts itself as useful. “Not Josephine”, she manages to utter through long gasps.

“What did you say”, tha man asks through shocked eyes, not releasing her entirely but loosening her grip enough to allow her to speak.

“Not Josephine. Trapped her in”, the words stumble out of Clarke. He lets go off her throats but keeps a restraining grip on her arms, her body pressed against the wall next to the door.

“Why should I believe you “, he asks after some time, his anger still very much on the surface.

Clarke prepares herself for some solid logical reasoning. “For starters I don’t even know your name”, she says.

“You could be bluffing”.

“Take me to my friends and they’ll confirm it for you that I’m Clarke and not some body snatching, privilaged brat”, proposes Clarke, hoping to catch two birds with one shot.

Her words make the man smirk, “even in playacting mode, Josephine could not be so self aware as to call herself those things”. Then all of a sudden, he comes at her, a long vase in his hand. Clarke is fast enough to stop the blow and, to her surprise, the man does not try to hurt her again. He stills and shrugs, “fine. Believe you now”.

“Care to explain?”, she asks, too tired to show indignation.

“Josephine never had the best of reflexes. And she definitely wasn’t left handed”, he explains, pointing to where Clarke still tightly clutched the case with her left hand.

She sets the vase down, “I do not remember you introducing yourself”, she said acidly.
The man smirks sheepishly, “I’m Ryker. I’m a prime, which obviously you’ve figured out. I’m not like Josephine“, he adds pointedly.

She only nods at first. Then she adds, “I’m Clarke”, for once savoring the words only to be hit by another jolt of pain in her head. “Aaagh”, she grunts and crouches down on the floor, shocked by the force of the blow.

“What is happening“, Ryker asks with a tiny hint of concern in his voice.

“She is fighting me, what else”, Clarke declares matter of factly.

As she concludes yet another round, she looks up at the prime in front of her. There is wariness in his eyes. “You don’t have to choke me”, she says assuringly, lifting her left hand.

Ryker sighs, “I can help you”, he says flatly.

“Get rid of her?”, Clarke enquires with disbelief.

Ryker shakes his head, “Sadly, that is a bit above my pay grade. What i can help with is subduing her”.

Clarke considers his words for a short spam of time, “I’ll take what I can get”, she shrugs in agreement.

“Follow me”, he instructs, walking towards the door. With his hand on the door knob, he abruptly turns and adds, “quietly. ‘Cause even though this was my first attempt to kill Josephine, the whole Sanctum knows we were never the best of friends. We cannot be spotted going to my workshop “.

Clarke nods obediently.

Neither of them utters a word en route, but the moment the workshop door closes behind her, Clarke wheels around and demands, “why are you helping me?”

Ryker scoffs, “I was wondering when you’d ask. There couldn’t after all be much trust left in you”. His words illicit a sad look from Clarke. He then simply explains, “Common enemy. I hate her as much as you do. Actually, more”, he adds after some thought.

Clarke studies him. Choosing to keep her guard up, not that she thought she would ever be able to pull it down ever again, she further questions, “And how are you going to help me?”

“With these”, he opens a drawer and slides his hand in, taking out a long, rectangular box and a bottle full of a dark bluish liquid. From the box he takes out a syringe, making his intention all too clear.

“What the hell is that”, Clarke asks, now alert like a pray sensing a nearby predator.

“Relax. I use this to subdue myself, when they wanna come out”, Ryker explains plainly.
“What?”, she asks, letting her incomprehension show.

“I told you I wasn’t like her, Clarke”, is all he is able to offer as explaination when a voice intrudes.

“Clarke?”, Raven stands at the head of the staurcase on the corner of the room. “Why did you call her Clarke”, she asks with a hoarse voice, her reddened eyes full of confused anger.

“Because she is Clarke”, Ryker explains, “she turned out to be sturdier than most. Like you said she was”.

“its really me, Raven”, Clarke assures, her genuineness carried onto her voice. And it only takes so much for Raven to believe her. She descends the stairs as fast as her one good leg would allow her to and wraps herself around Clarke in a tight embrace.

“I told them you could’ve survived this. Just like you survived Praimfaya. I just couldn’t figure out how”, she says regretfully.

“Them? So, who else found out?”, Clarke asks with concern for her friends.

“Only Abby hasn’t been told yet”. The words are a blow to Clarke. Unlike the ones that Josephine has been throwing at her, this blow hurts her heart, not her head. She feels sad for the shock and pain that her friends and family must have suffered through. Especially those who had stood with her even when everyone else hadn’t.

“Madi”, she asks. Raven nods, sending a squeeze of pain through her heart.

“Bellamy?”, she asks next.

“He was the first to find out”. That knowledge makes Clarke flinch.

Keeping a handle on her emotions, she tells Raven, “Then I don’t wanna delay telling him any longer. I need to see him and the rest before anything else. But him before others”.

“Of course, you do”, Raven says with a subtle hint of understanding. “Ryker, do you mind carrying a message for us?”

“What about Josie?”, he enquires of Clarke.

“I can handle her for some more time, I’m sure. Besides”, Clarke takes a seat, massaging her temples with her fingers, “I don’t trust you enough to take any random drug you pass on as salvation “.

Ryker shrugs, “suit yourself”. He doesn’t tuck in the containers at their original locations, choosing instead to leave them on the top of the table and walks past Clarke. “Bellamy would be the guy who was breaking all that stuff, right?”, he asks of Raven as Clarke looks up sharply.

“That’s right “, Raven answers softly and he leaves.

“Is he okay?” Clarke asks as soon as she hears the door shut.

Raven narrows her eyes, “obviously he isn’t, Clarke. In fact, out of us all, he is in the worst shape possible “, Clarke sighs, sorrow welling up underneath her skin. “Even Madi took the news slightly better than him” adds Raven, shaking her head.

And then they sit there in silence, waiting for the hard seconds to pass. Clarke listens in the silence; inward for the bellowing shrieks of her nemesis Josephine and outward for the approaching footsteps of her most forgiving friend.

She cannot wait to tell him how big a role he has had in this rebirth of hers, how his presence in that labyrinth of memories helped her navigate her way back to the surface. She wants to tell him that she had managed to get up and that she was going to fight with every ounce of her energy to stay up and that there was no reason for him to grieve or be sorry for.

They would end this mad tyranny of the Primes and they would do it, like always, together.

Chapter 3: Together

Summary:

609 is 2 weeks away!
So... speculations that are not going to come entirely true.

What happens after the Jo*Clarke kidnapping? Lots of emotion, bit of fun.

Notes:

Chapters are not in continuation, please don’t get mad. I write what I feel would be the most interesting vurrently.

Hope you like it. Happy reading

Chapter Text

TOGETHER

 

Clarke struggled in her fetters. Her cage, as Josephine had called it. She had to admit that not everything Josephine said was a lie. And she could see it all, as Murphy had been told. That was another truth.

And now she saw him crouching on the ground, supported by Emori and a sting of remorse did pass through her. He was just being himself, a survivor. She got that. What she did not understand is where was his line, the one you’re not supposed to cross. Or whether there was a line at all.

But contemplating Murphy was a fool’s errand, and a problem for another day. Right now, Clarke focused all her energy on helping Bellamy as he dragged her Josephine-possessed body out of the security blanket of the shield. A little imbalance here and a little twist there, and she was able to reduce Josephine’s resistance a little, not that it was any match for Bellamy’s determination in the first place.

She watched as Josephine sulked and threatened but made no more moves to stop her abduction once the shield went back up and she found herself on the other side of it. Clarke couldn’t help admiring Emori’s brilliance and the sheer strength of her character that was giving her this opportunity. She would find a way to thank her if she was free... when she was free.

“Walk straight ahead. Do not try anything funny”, Bellamy told Josephine, shoving her ahead of him.
“Or what? You’re going to hurt your friend?”, Josephine retaliated with a taunting sweetness.
A sad look crossed quickly through his face. “You’re not her”, he calmly replied.
“But the body is hers”, Josephine pointed out, turning to look him in the eyes. “And she will feel the pain, mind you”.
Bellamy remained quiet for some time, taking in the new information. Then, he took a step closer. Josephine just stood there, curious to see his next move. Then, as he kept moving closer, she asked, “are you trying to make a point here or...”, she shook her head enquiringly.
“Can she hear me too”, he asked to which Josephine merely scoffed, indicating clearly that she could neither deny, nor confirm that.

So, he addressed her himself, “Clarke?”
She triggered some neurons to make Josephine blink rapidly a couple of times.
As expected he caught the signal.
“Argggh, stop...”, Josephine was in the middle of expressing her extreme displeasure when a syringe found a vein in her neck as Bellamy continued to address Clarke. “Go to sleep now. When you wake up”, he paused to catch her falling body, “we’ll be somewhere near a solution”.

***

What she woke up in did not feel like a forest ground. But what she woke up to was very much what she’d expected. Bellamy Blake stared down at her from some distance, his face hardened into expressionlessness. It was not a sight Josephine wanted to see.

She closed her eyes once again. This man was like a menacing vampire who refused to leave you alone untill you gave him what he wanted. And what he wanted was Clarke Griffin. And Josephine couldn’t just guve her back, could she. She was one of her conquests now. She opened one eye and looked at Bellamy still giving her the death stare. If he were Medusa, she’d be the hardest of the hard rocks by now.

“Still me”, she said, sitting up, hands and feet tied to a cot. If she was going to go through that, she could at least keep pestering him to her fullest.
“I’m aware”, he replied icily.
“I thought you promised Clarke that she’d wake to a solution nearby”, Josephine further taunted. “Well, she’s awake too. Very close to sleeping forever”, she did not think his glare could become worse but somehow, at those words, it did, “but awake for now”.

He came to stand directly in front of her. Crouching down, he was directly on eye level with her. He looked for traces of Clarke, it was so obvious he did not bother to be subtle. “Clarke”, he called to her, and to Josephine ‘s immense discomfort she responded, her reaction fiercer than last time. “You’re doing good , Clarke. Keep fighting and remember “, he paused at those words, straightening up and firming up his stance, “I won’t let you die”, he said with such pure determination that even Josephine’s breath hitched in for a moment. She covered it up quickly though, shaking her head at his stubbornness.

This was when he suddenly got up, walked up to a door and opened it, announcing, “she’s awake”.
Two people walked into the damp room. One of them she knew from their laughable encounter during Clarke’s little rebellion. Octavia Blake, the one who’d straight up refused to fight for her. The other person, Josephine could not quite place. She did not have to wait long for an introduction as the man spoke, “Hello Josephine “. And that was introduction enough.
Though his body and voice were alien, Josephine could easily tell who the man in front of her was. “Gabriel”, she observed, solemn for once, “it has been quite a while, Old Man”.

“It’s funny, I’m the old man and yet you are the one deteriorating with time”, Gabriel observed detachedly.
Josephine was just coming up with a fitting reply when Bellamy interrupted hurriedly, “alright now, you got your proof? Now, prep for the surgery, please”, he instructed authoritatively and, to Josephine’s surprise, Gabriel complied. Without another word or argument he stepped out of the room quickly. Octavia did not follow, choosing instead to lurk in a corner nearby.

This time Josephine was worried. Gabriel could most certainly not only take her out of Clarke but also wipe her out entirely. Unless she could get him to change his mind, appeal to his once dominant feelings. But Bellamy had taken measures against that attack already. Now the only person she could get to was him.

“Do you know, Bellamy”, he looked up front where he sat leaning on a stool across from her with his interlinked hands on his forehead, “up until yesterday I did not know how to get rid of Clarke. Do you know who it was that told me this beautiful secret”, she asked with raised eyebrows.

“Murphy, who else”, Bellamy said matter of factly.
“Wrong answer”, Josephine smiled, “it was Clarke”, she declared.

He processed the words for some time, he shook his head, “No, You’re lying “, he said with a set jaw.

“Wow, you two really do think alike”, Josephine commented, holding the explaination of that comments till later. “But I’m telling the truth”.

“She would never do that”, Octavia observed, with an irritated look.

“Oh, but she did”, Josephine repeated, enjoying the Blakes’ combined anxiety. “I mean she fought hard. For long. But, I broke her in the end. Do you know what I used to do that?”, she asked Bellamy.
As he continued to remain silent, she simply dropped the words, “You, Bellamy. You made her give up her life”.
Bellamy’s lips parted as he heard those words, his eyes grew wider. Then, resuming a more normal stance, he responded, “what bullshit. You expect me to believe that?”

Josephine saw through his feigned courage. “Yes. Because she was doing pretty mediocre till I told her that you’ve settled for peace. That you don’t plan on burning Sanctum to the ground as such. That is when she put down all the guns once and for all”, she said. “Oh, and she also had the same “You’re lying “, “Bellamy would never”, first reaction like you”, she added excitedly.
Bellamy rose in one quick motion, as if he planned on hitting her, but chose to vent his anger on an empty cannister instead. “Bellamy “, Octavia cautioned with concern.

Josephine thought it best to go on, “then I may have said something about sacrificing herself for her friends and she”, she laughed shortly, “that stupid girl bought it”.
“You bloody”, Josephine heard Octavia charge at her from across the room but Bellamy stopped her midway, “O, don’t “, he sought to calm his sister, “Its also Clarke. You can’t harm her”, he added softly.
Octavia caught her brother’s emotions in moments. “Very well”, she said moving towards a desk, “Doesn’t mean we have to listen to her”. She returned with a syringe, not unlike the earlier one and grabbed Josephine by the neck, putting all her body weight on Clarke to stop any resistance.

“Wait”, Bellamy said just as the tip of the syringe was inches away from her neck. Then, he spoke to Josephine from behind Octavia, “It doesn’t matter what you told Clarke or what she thought up untill yesterday. Because, right now she knows we’re fighting for her and now, she is going to fight with her full strength. And you don’t know what that is like”, he concluded, his gaze intense and unwavering.

Josephine smiled “See you soon”, was all she could say before Octavia plunged the needle into her neck.