Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Illuson & Reality

It's so dark and cruel
This world is unbelievabily cruel
Like a mouse caught in a trap

In exchange for the false happiness and safety,
we turn a blind eye to the truth

It's time to wake up
Break the glass ceiling that is trapping us
Face the demons of this world with a heart of a lion, like a King

Be the light to the people
Inspire and fight like a Phoenix
Always ready to rise

Because if you don't rise,
How do you expect to achieve anything?

Chapter Text

Break Free Or Repeat

Control + C
Control + V
It's like this every day
Why won't this tiresome feeling go away?

It's rather easy actually
Yet we don't do it anyway
We just have to be willing to do it
Then it'll leave us until our very last day

Do you know how it'll leave us, even for a day?
It is daring to say, what you're afraid to say
It is daring to leave your comfort zone away
It is daring to try something new, every day

This is how this tiresome feeling will leave us, even for a day
Don't be afraid to throw your fear away
Do what you fear, even if it's your last day

Chapter Text

Behind Fallen Curtains

Our society is a mess
Always under social stress

Why can't I be free?
Why don't you see?
I just want to be me, wild and free
Like the untamed sea
Yet, you have to fight to be free
It's either you or me

In this nerve molesting society
There's no place for feelings
They're turning us into machines
What became of our young and innocent dreams?

Turning your best friends into your enemies
Society said that's what you need

Chapter Text

The Invisible String Of Fate

Like the withering leaves in the cold winter night
Like the small snow crystals falling from the starry sky
I hope that the lonely wind will carry me to your side

If you want, I'll paint the sky into the sea of our starry mind
Where you and I are one and the same
Even though we are far away from being in the same place
Our souls will still be connected by the invisible string of fate

And no treasure in this world, will ever compare to the incomparable feeling of when you are here
With me
In this cruel world
whenever you are here with me,
I feel so safe and free

The only safe heaven in this life,
Is in the afterlife and in in your arms
That is what the safe heaven is to me

Chapter Text

The Spider's Web

The social media is like the dancing queen, with her black and red dress of temptation and death
Her silky smooth voice guides you into her spider's web of sweet, yet deadly lies
Never noticing the genlte waltz you dance was, in fact, her waltz of the spider's web

Once caught in her grasp, you have to fight back before it's too late
Or you'll forever be under her spell
The spell of the dancing queen, with her black and red dress of temptation and death

That is the dark part of the social web

Chapter Text

Scared Of Loving You

Your existence itself is a crime for making me feel this way

It hurts
Knowing you'll probably never come my way
I sigh in dismay
My heart, too, aches in an unfamilliar way

Yet, I should've known anyway
We're too different
Yet they say opposite attracts no matter what you say

What can I say?
The thoughts of you never goes away

Chapter Text

Shadows Of Despair

Sinking, Slowly
I don't know where to go
Underneath my human mask is a monster
I don't know how to hold someone close
I want to believe that I care for them

But in reality
I don't even know how to do that
Walking on my own in the pouring rain
With nothing but my lonely thoughts, and my none-existing emotions left in a faraway place

I'm afraid
If I leave them for a little while,
I'll be too scared to get back in touch with them again

Time will pass, and the consequences will only become bigger if I wait

I'm afraid to be alone
I'm afraid

But I have to face my demons and leave the lagoon of emptiness and despair
The demons will see how well I fare
They'll see my strong frame
Following the bright light
Smelling the flower rich air
Defeating my demons, that wishes for my despair

-Blue_Bird_8

Chapter Text

One Day

You don't know what you are doing to my heart
You don't know what goes around in my head

My source of inspiration and my strength
If I stay by your side, will you stay by my side as well?
These thoughts are driving me insane
Why can't you stay in your lane?

What can I possibly do to make you see my feelings for you?

Maybe we weren't meant to be
Yet, as long as you're here with me,
With mutual feelings, or that of a dolphin in the wild, untamed and mysterious sea
I'll be happy as long as I can see you free

And who knows
Maybe one day you'll notice my feelings and return them to me
Along with your feelings reflecting me
And my feelings for you,(.....)

-Blue_Bird_8

Chapter Text

Thank You

They don't know my burden
They don't know my fear
They don't know what I hide inside, behind the fallen curtains
They only see what I allow them to see, from the outer side of me

Yet you somehow never give up on finding me in this black and deadly sea
I'm sinking, drowning in my own fear, so scared to be on my own

Yet you're always there, protecting me, helping me and never giving up on me
even when I try to push you away out of fear that you would leave me one day
However, you stood your ground and said, "I'll never leave your side"
You slowly opened the gates to the walls I had build around me throughout my life
You gave me the strength no one else had ever given me
You were the moon to my starry sky
because there are countless stars in the sky, yet there is only one moon
And that is you
Thank you

Chapter Text

True To One's Self

So far away
Yet so close

Looking out the window
Still lost in a daze
My thoughts of you are as many as there are stars in the sky's lane

I've fallen into your spell
But I wonder
Have you fallen into mine as well?

Either way, one day I'll know while hoping for the best
And of course I'll be myself
Because I'd rather having you loving me
Instead of a doll, a fake verson to be
I'll be myself
The real verson of me

-Blue_Bird_8

Chapter Text

Under The Cherry Blossom Trees

Under the cherry blossom trees we walk
On the cherry petal covered path we walk

Hand in hand, you and I
Not a care in the world
Because I only see you in front of my eyes
My galaxy, my starry night sky, my heart, my breath, my soul and my sky

That is what you are
Without you, I am merely a fallen cherry leaf footing to the ground
But with you by my side
I feel safe

Like a little cherry flower
You picked me up gently and caressed me
In your gentle hands, I feel safe

You and me
Walking hand in hand
Under the cherry blossom trees

-Blue_Bird_8

Chapter Text

Until We Meet

Hurt, what you can't see with your eyes
Lost, in the forest of life
Confused, as to where I belong
Unaware of what the heavens has for me to come
I walk endlessly in the jungle of life

Fearless
Hope in my heart that I'll meet you again
The tiny thread of hope that intertwines our paths
No matter what choose, our paths will surely connect
And become one once again

No matter how thorny, lonely or hard our separate paths may be
May our intertwined path be everything we ever dreamed of it to be

Surely it will
Because you will be there with me
And I will be there with you

Until we meet in the hills of cherry blossom trees
Our final destination
The hills of cherry blossom trees
Is where we will meet

-Blue_Bird_8

Chapter Text

One Thought

Your passion reflects that of a never ending flame
You follow your path that is the one and the same

Even if you felt lonely or out of place
Even if your body became covered in invisible scars that would never show their face

Broken, you became strong
Deceived, you became cautious
A person you thought you could trust, turned out to be the devil himself

Yet you held on, and moved on your own pace
You believed in yourself
Even if you were unsure if this path would lead you to your one and true place
You continued to move forward with one thought in mind without rest: No matter what knocks me down, I will rise again, follow my passion and succeed until the end

-Blue_Bird_8

Chapter Text

방탄소년단

The path you chose was hard and merciless
It was one that would tear you apart and drive you insane
Yet you held on, and showed that the results of teamwork was priceless
You stayed who you are and was true to yourself, from the start and until the end.

-Kim Namjoon, You wanted to be you, you wanted to make a change in this world and not just be 1st of 5000th. Now here you are, changing the world with your golden heart and one of a kind lyrics, you make it seem as though you're not breaking a sweat, yet we know that behind those mesmerizing lyrics of yours is passion and dedication that is present.

-Kim Seokjin, You felt you were never good enough like the rest of your team, you wanted to make her proud and you worked hard to prove it. However, you were always an equal to your team and a son to be forever proud of.

-Min Yoongi, You were on your own, with your passion and only 1 person pushing you on, you often wondered if this was the right path for you, until you proved them all wrong and they saw your one of a kind talent for your passion shining through.

-Jung Hoseok, You wanted to make them proud, to show them that you truly are a son to be proud of, dancing was your passion and your father was worried about your future, you proved that you'd manage, you worked hard and it payed off. But truth be told, you were a son to be proud of from the very start.

-Park Jimin, You worried about your appearance even when your body was healthy and strong, you still felt you weren't good enough for them. And then after working so hard for all those years, you finally realized that you always were and always will be good enough. Sweetheart that's what I wanted to tell you all along, you are perfect just the way you are.

-Kim Taehyung, You came from a family of farmers and took the chance of a lifetime giving it your all, you were hidden away and you sometimes felt out of place, yet you worked hard and put a smile on everybody's face. You worked hard and proved you were just like everyone else. My precious friend, you are the one in a million person that I've had the pleasure to meet, stay the way you are and be true to yourself, we love you no matter what you want to be.

-Jeon Jungkook, You were shy and reserved and had to move at such a young age, with an unsure future staring you dead in the face. You, too, wanted to make them proud, you wanted to help and that is why you gave up your childhood and worked harder than anyone else without rest. Over time, you slowly became more open to your Hyungs, and you couldn't bear the thought of them being in pain, that is also why you worked even harder and their trust in you is what you gained. All the hard work you did payed off, you are a son to be forever proud of, and you are the Golden Maknae of your wonderful family. But most importantly, you are who you want to be.

You never knew my past, present nor future
You never cared that my body was covered in invisible scars, nor that my past was darker than the darkest ocean pearl
You welcomed me with open arms when I thought no one else would
Even when we were so far away from one another, you were always at my side, always in my heart, supporting me, helping me, nursing me
You dived headfirst into the darkest of oceans and you broke the ice that I was frozen in without a second thought and you saved me, even when you never fully knew who I was.

Thank you for being our light in this dark and cruel world.
Thank you for being who you are and being the light that so many of us needed. Thank you for being our strength in our roughest times.
Thank you for being the outreached arm that pulled us out of the darkness in our darkest days.
Thank you for being the shoulder for us to cry on, thank you 방탄소년단 for being you.

We'll forever love and support you no matter what happens in the far unknown future.
We'll forever be your wings and we'll take you even higher
We'll be the shoulder for you to cry on when you are sad
We'll be your friend that you can share all your good and sad moments with
We are and we will forever be here for you 방탄소년단
Thank you so much, and we love you all from the very bottom of our hearts
Thank You

Chapter Text

There was this boy whose soul was as beautiful as the flowers on earth and a smile brighter than the stars in the sky
Wherever he went he wanted to make then smile
Whenever he made them smile he felt proud of himself

The boy with the flowers who was, and still is as pure as snow, you never know what he went through long ago
He went through sorrow and pain, however that never made him slow down, rather the opposite, he had something to gain
He gained strength and compassion, he turned the sorrow and pain into something everyone would like to gain

He gained strength and he gained a heart of gold
He wanted to make everyone that was hurting to smile and forget the pain
He wanted to be their role model, their light in their darkest days

The boy whose soul was as beautiful as the flowers on earth and possessed a smile brighter than the stars in the sky
The boy with the flowers, who wanted to make everyone smile and forget their sorrows and pain

Chapter Text

Your Fake Love

You liked it, didn't you?
Pulling at the strings of my heart like a puppet master pulling the strings of his precious doll

Who The heck am I?
I never wanted to live like this
I never wanted this kind of love
I never wanted my emotions to be treated like this
I'm so sick of this love

For you, I pretended to be happy and strong, while in reality I could barely keep going on
My soul is drowning in the pitch black sea
My heart is ablaze yet I know you'll never see
I stared into the mirror and saw someone that resembled me, all this time I wondered who it was, It was indeed me
I almost never recognized myself because of this fake love created by you

I heard no evil from you
I saw no evil from you
And I spoke no evil of you
I was blinded by my feelings for you

I molded this pretty little lie for myself hoping you did love and care about me
Turns out, you were the cause for me not recognizing myself, shackling my heart to the cold and hard ground, and taking sanity and my freedom from me

I entered the maze of your fake love thinking it was the maze to your heart
How wrong was I for never seeing the dark path you made me enter that burned like the brightest blazing flame

Just like this love between you and me
I grew a flower that can never bloom, in a dream that will never be true

Chapter Text

Most of the time we seem to forget all the efforts that were made.All those sleepless nights they could've been in bed, they spent on producing songs that would touch our hearts and never forget.

They were stomped on and made fun of, too. Treating them like trash without a single ounce of respect.

Despite all that, they worked together and rose like a Phoenix with the heart of a lion and proved them all wrong in the end.Haters are gonna hate, players are gonna play, they killed them with success and they buried them with a smile.Never letting the hate get to them, proving that teamwork made the dream work in the end.

Dear BTS, you are our Serendipity that is the cause of our Euphoria.Ever since the creation of the universe, everything was destined to be.

We'll be Young Forever.

Even though the Dead Leaves of the cold atumn night lead us toward the harsh winter nights, your mesmerizing words will forever keep us warm.Your voice will be our shining light guiding us through it all.Through the hardships and against the demons inside us all.

No matter our gender, religion, past or scars, the only thing that mattered in their eyes was us being ourselves.It was not a coincidence that they all entered our lives.

Dear BTS, you made a door in our hearts called the Magic Shop.The same Magic Shop that gave us the best of us in our darkest times.

It is our turn to be your light.Let us return the sea of purple stars back to the sky.Allow us to be your wings and carry you all into the future with your heads held high.

Being So Far Away from you, I am scared that if I tried to tell you everything I had in my heart, it would not be close enough to 1% of what I want to say and that my voice would never reach you.Your lyrics touch our hearts, moves our souls and inspires to aim for the sky.

Thank you BTS for everything you have done for us.Thank you BTS for being born and inspiaring us to be the best of us.

But most importantly;

Thank you Kim Namjoon

Thank you Kim Seokjin

Thank you Min Yoongi

Thank you Jung Hoseok

Thank you Park Jimin

Thank you Kim Taehyung

Thank you Jeon Jungkook

Thank you for being yourself.

Chapter Text

My Everything

When I look into your eyes, I get lost in them

As if being under a spell, I get drawn towards them

And I get lost in the sea of starry skies that is hidden within them

When I look at your smile, I can't help but smile as well

The smile on your face is reflected in your eyes

The same smile which tells the fairy tale of your emotions that you sometimes try to hide

When I make you smile, I feel like a cloud in the sky

Knowing that I caused you happiness in this cruel world, I can be at peace as well

Knowing that I made you smile again

I'll do it as many times as you need me to, as long as I can see that smile of yours again

Because to me, you are my galaxy, my sea of stars, the very breath I take

Every beat my heart make

I give it all to you

As long as I'm with you, my everything

I give it all to you, my never-ending galaxy

As long as I'm with you, nothing else matters than you and me

Together until the end, under the starry skies

Just you and me

Chapter Text

Blinding lights
Loud screams
Hundreds of flights

Suddenly, I'm thrown in a daze
Cameras shoved in my face
Building up with immeasurable stress

At times, I can't visit my family and friends
I would only be followed by the press

During a concert I want to do my best
I don't want to mess up and destroy this experience for my friends

There are hundreds of me inside of me
However, which one of them are the real me?
Will I ever be able to show the world the real me?

If I were to show them the real me, would they accept me or try to tear me apart, never allowing me to be free?

The media attacks my simple and humane flaws
They never see how hard I work, always expecting me to be perfect

Why won't you let me catch my breath?
Are you that desperate to make my life a freakin' mess?

I'm human, just like you
I have a heart, just like you
I have emotions, just like you
And I have my own fears, just like you

Chapter Text

At times when I feel nervous, I think of you

You taught me that never giving up would always make me break through

You may not show it, but I you're at times also nervous and scared

You thought that making a mistake would be seen as a sin and that is what you feared

At times you felt that you could never touch the sky

Moving aimlessly in a dark, yet comfortably dream-like lie

You pushed past your limits and changed your fate that you thought was sealed for good

You struggled and ran as fast as you could

You reached out sky high for the butterfly and that's when you realized;

You were the butterfly

You were reaching out for your not so perfect, yet so beautiful self

You're just a human being like everyone else

Please keep on shining bright like you always have and forget about the haters

Please never forget to simply love yourself since you're the one you should love in this world

Chapter Text

Your smile is contagious
Your dancing skills are dangerous
But most importantly; your soul is precious

You didn't just give us Hope World, no, you gave our world hope
You're our hope and in return we'll forever and always be your hope

You're not just a member of BTS
you're not just J-Hope
You're not just our sunshine

You're Jung Hoseok and we love and adore you for who you are

The distance between us all may be far and when I feel like I'm about to fall, I always think of you and your smile.
After that, I feel like I was never going to fall at all.

Please allow us to be your wings and make you all reach the stars
Please allow us to be your shoulder to cry on and heal your scars
Please allow us be there for you when you're smiling and giving it your all.

Thank you so much Jung Hoseok for being there for us and for giving us your all.
Thank you so much Jung Hoseok for being yourself and aiding us when we were about to fall.

Thank you so much Jung Hoseok
We love you for who you are with your flaws, imperfections and scars

Thank you so much Jung Hoseok for being who you are.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Chapter Text

In a positive way, you helped me do things I thought I never could
You helped me move on slowly and brace reality, something I thought I never could

Moving out of my comfort-zone which I thought I never could
Exploring the world and conquering my fear is what I should

At times I feel so down I question my own existence and drown in self-loath, pity and despair
But with you in my thoughts I conquered it bit by bit and had something to gain

It's true that it bounces back and forth while trying to pick at my wits
But thinking of you, your struggles and how you overcame them always helps me protect my wits

I may stumble and fall
It may bounce back and make me feel like I lost it all

But as long as I see you keep on fighting and moving on, I'll never give up, I'll pick myself up and keep on fighting while giving it my all

So thank you, even though you don't know of my existence you've helped me cope with my demons more than you could ever know

°•○•°•°•○•°•○•°•○•°•○°•○•°•°•○•°•○•°•○•°

Chapter Text

They say that time heals all wounds but I don't think so
My body is a canvas of invisible scars
My heart shattered and got torn to shreds
My mind is my worst enemy haunting me by reminders of my traumas
I was drowning in a pitch black Sea that is my mind

Then, you, Bangtan and your music came along, it was as if someone had reached out and saved me from my withering mind
The shattered and torn pieces of my heart were picked up and assembled by your sincerity, although still scarred, but at least made into one piece again
The invisible wounds on my body and soul were stitched together by your genuine and healing music to easen my unnoticeable pain
Your soothing voice whiped my unseen tears that had been running for years
Your very heart and soul, which is evident in every song that you create, soothes my troubled and dark mind, erasing all of my worries and stress
Your music and voice is one of the reasons as to why I'm still fighting and not giving in to my anguish
I hold my head high and try to keep moving forward, your words echo in my mind:

"Dream, I will be there for your creation until the end of your life
Dream, wherever you might be, it will be lenient
Dream, you will fully bloom after all the hardships
Dream, though your beginnings may be humble, may the end be prosperous"

These are some of the words I ever so desperately cling to, because I don't want to give in to my horrible and traumatic past
I'm scared that they'll judge me for experiencing something I could not understand as a child, only realizing what had happened as I grew older
Yet, your music and voice ease my pain and self-hate that I'm still struggling with from time to time
Your comforting and sincere words stitched my broken heart and soul, making it look like a scarred heart instead of shattered glass on concrete
Your presence in your music is enough to calm me down enough to make me think straight and gives me strength, which is no easy feat
All in all, words can not describe how much your healing music and soothing voice has helped me through all this pain

I'm grateful for you all and all that you have done

I wish I could have deep conversations about anything and everything with you, not as Suga from BTS but as Min Yoongi
I wish I could meet you and tell you how much you and Bangtan have helped me in my struggling moments and getting me through
I feel so connected to you all through your music, though I find myself connecting slightly more to you, Min Yoongi

Thank you for being a big portion in my healing process and giving me strength to not give up on myself
I never know if I'll ever get the chance to tell you all this in person but I hope that this will make its way to you like how your music and voice reached me in the darkest corners of my mind

Thank you so much for creating such healing and comforting music that reaches the hearts of everyone whose struggling with something in their lives
Thank you for following your passion even though you felt like the entire world was against you
Thank you so much for everything you do, Min Yoongi

°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°♡°

Chapter Text

Shoulders: always tense
Mind: a never-ending, buzzing mess

I'm sick and tired of this mess
Am I truly of any less value to be seen as anything less than a human with emotions, heart and flesh?

Always giving but nearly never receiving
My past? Burn it, move on and stop grieving

There are times I am truly grateful and happy, yet there are times I want to be left alone, cry and destroy everything I see
Even though I want to do it all, I tell myself to not lose control and just let it be

You can see me
But can you truly see the real me?
I'm broken and lost
Yet I don't want you to feel lost as well

I put on a strong face to aid you
For you I could pretend I was strong when in truth I was weak
For you I could pretend I was happy when in truth I'm long gone and broken

I've sadly stopped living for my own sake and started to live for my loved ones instead

It's a bit funny how I'm a logical person, yet at the same time I move in the dark blindly by myself

I may not live for my own sake for now, but I'll be ok living for my loved ones instead and aid them whenever I can while working on myself

Untill I break free and remove the chains of self-loathing and hate, I'll keep on aiding my loved ones instead

However, I promise that I'll fight and break free from these chains until my very last breath

But can you promise me that you'll also do your best if you feel like you're in the same place as me?

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°