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Chapter Text

Kakashi shared a close bond with his father, rooted in love and affection, unlike the sense of duty that had defined Sakumo's relationship with his own father. Kakashi's recollections of his mother were vague and hazy, yet they left him with a feeling of warmth and security. Love had filled their home for such a short time before his mother succumbed to an illness that ravaged the village. After her death, his father's smile faded and it was never as easy or as bright. Four-year old Kakashi did not know how to bring it back. He often spent the days his father was not well with Minato Namikaze, who would later become his mentor and the Fourth Hokage. At the home of his father's trusted friend, Kakashi began to heal from his mother's loss. While listening to Minato's stories of his father's heroic deeds, he felt he had found a way to restore his father's smile. As the youngest student ever to enroll in the academy, Kakashi was labeled a 'prodigy' and 'genius,' terms that followed him as he donned his genin uniform, his Hitae-ate perpetually slipping due to his small hands' inability to secure it tightly. Yet, the whispers didn't matter to him; his sole aim was to see his father smile again. On the day he was taken to the academy for the first time, his father's expression was the nearest to a smile since his mother's passing.

Kakashi was a diligent student, striving to earn his father's pride despite the challenges of older, larger children threatening his progress with words and fists. Initially, Kakashi wasn't popular; he was a serious student, unconcerned with others' opinions, save for his father's and sensei's. Unyielding to challenges, his small stature often put him at a disadvantage. Initially, a few hits would have him on the ground, fighting back tears held back only by his sense of pride. He kept to himself the tears shed at his mother's grave, seeking solace from the ghost of her memory. He concealed his bruises, standing firm even as pain and frailty wracked his frame. Sakumo, often away on missions, saw Kakashi less frequently, yet always greeted him with a smile that grew warmer with each return. That smile became Kakashi's beacon, a sign that normalcy was slowly being restored.The concept of soulmates was not something Kakashi dwelled on. His parents, who were soulmates themselves, proudly displayed their matching wolf soulmarks on their forearms. Kakashi, still too young to grasp the idea fully, would pester his mother with questions, eager to know when he would receive his own wolf soulmark.

"One day, Kakashi, when you're all grown up like your father, you will receive your own unique soulmark. It probably won't be a wolf like ours. It will be something special, meant only for you and your soulmate. And when you meet your soulmate, you will see they have a soulmark that matches your own."

"What is a soulmate?" he demanded, still failing to comprehend.

His mother chuckled at his impatience, tenderly smoothing his tousled hair. "A soulmate is the person who loves you the most," she replied softly.

"But you love me the most!" Kakashi protested indignantly.

"Yes," Kakashi's mother confirmed. "Your father and I love you more than anything else in the world, yet a soulmate is a little different. They are the first person besides us who will love you more profoundly than you can imagine. Your soulmate will remain with you even when your children leave you. A soulmate will understand you better than anyone else, even better than you understand yourself some days. With your soulmate by your side, you can never be truly unhappy."

Kakashi nodded his head with the knowing innocence of a child, believing firmly in the truth his mother set before him. His parents were soulmates, their happiness evident. And when his mother passed away, he also understood that his father's happiness would never be complete again, because his soulmate was gone.

For a period, Kakashi knew happiness. As days passed, the memory of his mother and the grief it brought gradually diminished. His sensei was a constant presence, even when his father was absent. Kakashi harbored no resentment towards his father, a man revered by many. His father devoted himself to protecting the village and cherished his teammates and son above all else. The days when Sakumo collected Kakashi from the academy became cherished memories. Despite the ignominy surrounding his father's death, those memories remained Kakashi's most treasured for years.

Kakashi was greatly affected by his father's death. His decision to save his teammates over completing a crucial mission resulted in Sakumo's disgrace. This choice was mirrored in Kakashi's treatment by his peers; he faced ridicule and mockery, with classmates whispering when he passed. With his acute hearing, the taunts became increasingly difficult to ignore. In the weeks following the mission, Kakashi's resentment towards his father grew. He saw his father as a failure, condemned by his own teammates for prioritizing their lives over the reputation of Konoha.

Despite this, he held great love and respect for his father. So Kakashi concealed his resentment, never revealing the taunts and fights he faced due to his father's reputation. Sakumo was not blind to the unspoken truth, and it weighed down his heart with shame. He longed for his wife's presence, to provide the support he could not. Seeing Kakashi return home, shoulders drooping and fists bruised, he was filled with despair.

The death of his wife had deeply wounded his spirit, and her absence weighed on him daily. Living in a world without her was painful. He longed for her smile and her gentle laughter. He missed the joy of waking up beside her. He mourned the warmth she'd infused into his life, which had been marked by a harsh upbringing. Yet, he clung to his sanity for the sake of his son and the village and shinobi he had sworn to protect. However, his presence now seemed to breed resentment in the village, and their disdain was difficult to endure. His mistakes were beginning to affect his son's life, something he had never intended. Although Kakashi bore a striking resemblance to him with silver hair and dark eyes, Sakumo could glimpse his wife in the way Kakashi smiled—a smile that had become rare because of him. A smile he felt he'd stolen away with his actions.

As he contemplated his wife waiting for him beyond life's threshold, his choice became clearer. The thought that he might his son's burden of turmoil and disgrace solidified his resolve. He refrained from writing a letter to Kakashi, too ashamed to attempt to justify his decision to end his life. Even as he deluded himself into thinking he was making the right decision, the thought of no longer accompanying his son home from the academy pained him. In his final moments, he was consumed by visions of the man Kakashi would grow to be and the hope of reuniting with his wife. He died beset with regrets, but with the firm belief that his son's future would be brighter.

The events surrounding the discovery of his father's body were lost to Kakashi. He could only recall the sight of his father's lifeless form, too still for slumber, and himself collapsing onto his father in sorrow and shock. Time crawled by, as Kakashi held onto a father that had chosen to leave him behind. The anger surfaced later, fueled by the growing murmurs about Sakumo's choice. It was this anger that sustained him when his sorrow nearly dragged him down into the same abyss his father had succumbed to.

After Sakumo Hatake's death, the mask became a permanent part of him, rarely removed, until even those who had known him since childhood could barely recall his face. Kakashi realized he couldn't walk the same path as his father. He resolved to adhere to the shinobi code, forsaking the search for a soulmate. Determined not to repeat his father's mistakes, he vowed to dedicate his life to the village. He could not love as his father and mother had.

Minato-sensei had become a constant presence in his life. Kushina also became an integral part of his earliest recollections, her bold demeanor and intimidating frown often prompting him to subconsciously touch the back of his head in a gesture of sheepish remembrance. Following his father's passing, they attempted to welcome him into their home and become his surrogate family. He frequently dined at Minato's house, even as he stubbornly refused their care and pretended a preference for solitude. His behavior had shifted from the once vibrant and playful to consistently formal, eliciting looks of quiet acceptance from them. They watched his moments of stumbling through teamwork and friendship, and always had hope that one day he would be able to let go of his self-imposed burden. Had they lived longer, perhaps they could have coaxed him from his voluntary seclusion. But they too, were lost to him. He later regretted distancing himself from them, but he was comforted by the thought that they knew he loved them too. 

Obito and Rin might have considered themselves his best friends, but he never himself get that close. He tolerated Rin's longing looks and Obito's eager enthusiasm because they were his teammates. Among the three, Obito was the most talkative, filling the silence with manic glee. Rin was patient to a point, eventually rolling her eyes at Obito's antics and looking to Kakashi for commiseration. Kakashi was aware that she believed she loved him, but he also recognized Obito's deep love for Rin, despite her feigned ignorance of it. Kakashi told himself he was merely enduring them, and ignored the part of himself that wished to reach out.

Kakashi's commitment to his chosen path was truly challenged when Rin was taken. He proceeded with the mission, ready to forsake Rin with a heavy heart. He experienced regret and sorrow, yet he recalled his father's disgrace and demise. It was Obito who refused to accept defeat, valuing Rin's safety over his allegiance to the village. Obito's intense conviction shook the very core of Kakashi's firm determination. Kakashi's father had cherished his mother deeply, without ever regretting it. Obito's view of Kakashi's father as a great man swayed Kakashi, and he eventually relented. His own convictions could not hold a candle to Obito's fierce resolve.

It was upon Obito's death that they realized Obito and Rin were soulmates, a testament to fate's cruelty. The fact that their skin had never touched was inexplicable. Kakashi remembered countless instances where Obito had poked him playfully on the forehead, or whined until Kakashi relented to a tepid highfive. Instances where Rin's hand had grazed his briefly, offering hesitent support, or where he'd patted her shoulder awkwardly to cheer her up. But Obito had always maintained a respectful distance from Rin, while Rin had harbored a false aversion to the Uchiha, treating him with scorn. In a strange twist of fate, it seemed fitting that they were bound together in the moments before Obito's death.

As Rin placed her hands on Obito's face to perform the surgery that would remove his eye, she gasped. Obito grinned despite the pain, knowing she might finally accept his love, albeit too late. Rin saw the boy who adored her more than himself, and she finally understood. Kakashi faded from her thoughts, overshadowed by the proud boy who kissed her with a mouthful of blood. Grief-stricken, she watched him slowly roll up his sleeve to show the raven tattoo on his right forearm. Kakashi averted his eyes as Rin revealed her matching tattoo on her lower back. He left them alone, his shoulders stiff and grief contained. When Rin beckoned him with a cry of despair, her voice shattered on his name. Kakashi's farewell to Obito was that of a friend, echoing the words Obito had once said to him.

“Those that break the rules and regulations are scum. But those who abandon their comrades are even worse than scum.”

He had made a promise to his friend to protect Rin and had sworn to do so. However, it was not meant to be. Rin had acknowledged Obito as her soulmate, and until her last breath, she futilely insisted that she could sense his presence lingering in her mind. "It's as if he's still alive," she would claim. "I can feel him." This sensation, the presence of the boy she had come to love too late, would gradually lead her to madness. When she stepped in front of Kakashi's chidori, he read the peaceful acceptance on her face. 

Her passing brought an end to her suffering, yet it compounded Kakashi's. He had come to grasp the significance of connections and could pardon his father for his unwavering loyalty to his team. However, Rin's death only highlighted the perils of having a soulmate. He swore to shield his soul, and it appeared destiny respected his wish, as a soulmark never appeared on his skin.

Over time, he forged new bonds of camaraderie. Gai, the exuberant boy who had proclaimed himself Kakashi's eternal rival at their first encounter, became his dearest friend and ally. Kurenai, Asuma, Genma, and Anko, all shinobi who overlooked the whispers about Kakashi, sought his friendship. Despite his reservations, Kakashi came to tolerate, and eventually value, their companionship and affection, even with his reticent demeanor. However, after Minato and Kushina's passing, he found himself adrift for a while.

It was shameful, but he had turned away from the boy who bore a striking resemblance to his sensei, a resemblance that was painful. He rejected the opportunity to be a family with the young boy who endured the same kind of prejudice and mockery that Kakashi himself had experienced, only to a greater degree. Kakashi chose to ignore how the village treated Naruto Uzumaki and enlisted in the Anbu. His interactions with Tenzo, formerly known as Kinoe, reminded him of the truth in Obito's words. He placed his trust in Tenzo without a valid reason, which in turn, garnered him Tenzo's lifelong admiration and friendship.

Kakashi was eventually honorably discharged by the Third Hokage, who feared he might lose himself to the harsh demands of the Anbu. Kakashi accepted this decision; the toll of service and the loss of friends had begun to weigh heavily on him. His principle of loyalty to his comrades often conflicted with Anbu duties, and he was relieved to depart from its ranks. His sole regret was leaving Tenzo behind, but Tenzo's assurance that he was content and wished to stay brought peace to Kakashi's conscience.

The concept of soulmates hadn't crossed his mind for years. Kurenai and Asuma's bond was evident long before puberty set in. Their playful antagonism and Asuma's particular teasing of Kurenai were telltale signs. They were often spotted together at cafes and shops, seamlessly communicating without words. Kurenai matured first, her figure transforming rapidly. Kakashi found humor in Asuma's newfound speechlessness around her. Asuma's avoidance, a result of his burgeoning and perplexing emotions, pained Kurenai more than she showed. However, clarity came when Asuma hit puberty and they both developed matching marks—a crimson tree with budding branches—on the same day. At sixteen, they wed in a serene ceremony, their happiness palpable. This joyous union brought Kakashi's parents to mind, and he wished for Kurenai and Asuma a long, blissful life, free from the sorrow his father endured.

Gai did not have a mark after reaching puberty, and Kakashi was the same. This was not unusual since the marks did not appear until both individuals had reached puberty. This could indicate that their soulmate was younger, a notion that disturbed Kakashi until he turned twenty without a mark manifesting. He questioned whether fate would be so harsh as to assign him a much younger soulmate when he himself felt aged beyond his years. Gai lamented loudly over his missed opportunity for youthful love. Anko, who also lacked a soulmark, seemed to accept her situation with equanimity and remained unfazed.

Genma revealed his mark, a cluster of blue stars on his left shoulder, which had emerged when he was thirteen. He never sought the one who shared the same pattern, nor did he explain why, but Kakashi knew that by thirteen, Genma had already fallen for an unreachable girl. When questioned, Genma had responded, "The girl I want left the village. I don't need a mark to know she's the one for me, but I doubt our paths will cross again." Though known as a womanizer, Kakashi sometimes pondered if Genma used that reputation as a defense, shielding himself from the early heartbreak he had endured.

He never doubted Genma's feelings, dismissing the notion of youthful folly that others perceived. For civilians, the experience differed. Shinobi matured quickly, facing life's harsh realities earlier. In wartime, they relinquished their childhood for Konoha's welfare—an honor, yet a costly one. Kurenai and Asuma were fortunate to find each other amidst such turmoil. The grim life expectancy for shinobi was highlighted by Rin and Obito's fate. A shinobi without a mark often meant a soulmate lost too soon, likely another young shinobi fallen in battle. It seemed wiser to believe they never had a soulmate. Civilian-shinobi relationships seldom succeeded; a shinobi's duty to serve often overshadowed personal joy. Civilians often couldn't grasp a shinobi's intimate knowledge of war, only experiencing its indirect effects like food scarcity and the looming threat of attack—a fear kept at bay by the shinobi, ensuring Konoha's citizens remained untouched by war's true horrors. This protection came at the expense of many shinobi lives and the tarnished legacy of one child, Naruto Uzumaki. To Kakashi, safeguarding countless lives was a necessary sacrifice, yet the cost weighed heavily on him. He regretted not offering Naruto the family he deserved. By the time Kakashi acknowledged Naruto, Iruka Umino had become a father figure, showing Naruto more care than just another student. It was an injustice to Naruto, but Iruka's kindness surpassed Kakashi's, prompting him to withdraw from his mentor's son and dedicate himself to the village's protection.

Kakashi's long-feared soulmark emerged shortly after his 25th birthday. He had drowned his sorrows in alcohol the night the mark's burning sensation appeared. The mark was an unsightly behemoth, sprawling across his chest and stomach. It depicted a cherry blossom tree in full bloom perched on a grassy knoll, completely concealing the scars that previously marred the area. The realization that his soulmate, despite the possiblity of being a late bloomer, was still at least a decade younger, filled him with revulsion. That evening, Gai and Genma kept him company, drinking alongside him and eventually carrying him home when he passed out. Unaware of the cause of their friend's distress, they were accustomed to his sporadic bouts of losing control and chose not to pry. They remained oblivious to the reason for his drinking, opting to honor the privacy of their most reclusive friend.

Soulmarks were intended to be registered to facilitate the discovery of soulmates. Kakashi, however, did not register his, and after leaving Anbu, the medic-nin ceased their attempts to coerce him into mandatory physicals. 

Locating a soulmate was not as simple as searching through a registry. Every soulmark was distinct, yet they came with general descriptions and basic information about the individual who possessed the mark, including age, gender, and orientation, if they chose to disclose it. When someone found a person they thought could be their soulmate, they could send a meeting request. However, these encounters frequently led to disappointment. Following the emergence of his own soulmark, Kakashi volunteered to manage the registry desk.

The lack of suspicion arose simply because he had sustained severe injuries during an S-rank mission, leaving him with the choice of desk duty or an extended hospital stay for observation. Kakashi opted for the desk job, leveraging the well-known fact that he avoided hospitals whenever possible. He searched for individuals aged ten to sixteen who had recently reported a soulmark identical to his. During his two-week tenure at the registry desk, no new declarations were made, and he refrained from requesting further access to the registry. It was both confusing and reassuring that none of the registered individuals with a mark similar to his were a match. He followed up on twelve potential matches, whose descriptions varied from a detailed cherry blossom tree to something as nondescript as 'flower.' He felt no connection to any of them, regardless of gender. A match could only be definitively confirmed by comparing the marks directly. However, direct skin contact often served as confirmation before the marks were even viewed. The first touch of a soulmate was typically described as a cooling sensation coursing through one's veins, akin to a feeling of 'coming home.' Yet, Kakashi felt nothing but relief when he met with the twelve candidates, whose ages ranged from eleven to sixteen. All touches had been engineered to appear as an accident, his targets none the wiser. Kakashi hoped he never met his soulmate.

After leaving Anbu, he took on the role of a Jounin-sensei, engaging in missions like any other Jounin. The teams he evaluated were older than he had been as a genin, twice his age, yet far more joyful and naive. Observing their rounded faces and bright smiles, he harbored no regrets about failing three consecutive teams for not passing the bell test, just as his sensei had done with his team long ago. His reluctance to teach, as The Third had surmised, was only part of the reason, with the burden of his own past failures being a difficult reality to accept. More importantly, it was the lack of teamwork and camaraderie among the children. These kids wouldn't sacrifice for one another, nor would they support each other when necessary. He couldn't approve of anyone who didn't understand that abandoning comrades was worse scum. He couldn't endorse someone who, like his former self, was isolated and intent on solitude.

At 26, he had yet to pass a single genin team and anticipated no different when he heard who would be on his current one. He was determined not to be influenced by the fact that Naruto was Minato's son, Sasuke was the sibling of a former friend and the last of the Uchiha, or that Sakura Haruno was from a civilian family with parents who never advanced beyond genins. Kakashi had the expectation that Sakura would not surpass her parents' achievements.

XX

At eleven, Sakura awoke to find blood on her sheets and a dull ache in her abdomen. She immediately understood what was happening and was excited by the prospect of a soulmark appearing. Sakura, instilled with a sense of responsibility from a young age by her genin parents, promptly washed her bedding and nightclothes, replaced her sheets, and took a shower. Despite a cursory inspection, she found no mark, which brought her both relief and anxiety. The absence of a mark could increase the likelihood of Sasuke being her soulmate, as he might be too young to have one. Yet, the lack of a mark also stirred the fear of being soulmate-less, a fate playfully taunted by Ino but secretly dreaded by Sakura. She understood that a mark—or the absence of one—didn't define love; her parents had different marks but loved each other, just as Ino's markless parents were devoted to each other.

When she got out of the shower she inspected her body closely with critical eyes. She wasn’t flat-chested, but her breasts were nothing more than small buds, the hair between her legs wispy and barely there. She examined her body meticulously, peering under her arms and high between her thighs before turning to glimpse parts of the mark on the back of each shoulder. The tree, her namesake, irked her momentarily, and it wasn't until she stood before her full-length mirror that she could view the entire mark. The branches, dark and reaching toward her neck, spread across her shoulder blades, heavy with blooming pink cherry blossoms. The tree's roots settled on a small hillock, with tall grass veiling the tree's broad trunk. Sakura beamed at the intricacy of the mark, so lifelike she nearly smelled the fragrance of the blossoms that seemed to float eternally above the grass. Legend had it that the larger and more intricate the mark, the stronger the connection. Sakura had no evidence to confirm this, yet the thought made her chuckle with delight.

"Take that, Ino-pig!" she declared smugly to her reflection. She had acquired a soulmark before her unbearable rival. And maybe, just maybe, Sasuke had one as well.

She dressed swiftly, skipping her usual chest bindings to reveal her mark to her mother. Her mother chuckled softly at the sight of the mark and offered her daughter gentle congratulations, her smile radiating sincere delight at the happiness on her daughter's face. When Sakura left, she didn't see the worried frown that creased her mother's brow as her smile faded. It wasn't that she wasn't pleased for her daughter's opportunity to find her soulmate, as she remembered the giddy joy when her own mark appeared. However, she cherished her husband. Their love wasn't fiery passion, but a comforting, enduring warmth that had grown over the years. She kept secret from Sakura that in her youth, she had encountered her own soulmate, back when Sakura was just learning to walk. That man had implored her to elope with him, to leave behind the man she had promised to cherish forever. That request had resolved her dilemma. Her husband would have sorrowfully let her go, understanding her choice. But her soulmate had not considered the husband she'd be abandoning, nor the child she treasured above all. She had felt a fleeting temptation, but his talk of a new beginning excluded Sakura from their future. They said soulmates inherently understood each other, and she wondered if such understanding needed time to develop. Her soulmate had failed to grasp her love for Sakura, her commitment to her husband, or the sorrow she'd feel in leaving them. Ultimately, her choice was simple. She returned to her husband and child, asking her soulmate to leave her be. He passed away years later, when Sakura was six or seven. She wept for him in the solitude of night, mourning a man and a life she'd never know, but by dawn, she had steeled herself to continue. She couldn't bring herself to tell Sakura that soulmates don't guarantee a fairy-tale ending, and she found greater joy in the life she chose not to leave.

Sakura's mother was disturbed by the size and intricacy of the mark. The one she bore before her soulmate passed away was unremarkable—a small black half-moon, no larger than three fingers pressed together, on her left shoulder. With the years that followed her soulmate's death, the mark had turned an ashen grey. Her husband's mark, a cresting wave of similar size and color, was also simple. She was convinced that her husband would remain with his family even if his soulmate appeared. Perhaps, she mused, the simplicity of their marks shielded them from the allure of fated love. Both pragmatic, they had reservations about Sakura attending the Academy, yet they encouraged her to pursue her aspirations. They stood with reserved expressions as she departed for her first day at the Academy with a spring in her step.

Sakura emerged as an exemplary student, keen to learn with nearly flawless chakra control. Yet, her ninjutsu was not particularly strong, and her taijutsu also fell short. Sasuke, the last of the Uchiha, excelled in most things. Neji Hyuga nearly matched his talent, but his cousin, the heiress Hinata, was too timid and lacked the self-assurance needed for success. At the lower end of the class were Naruto Uzumaki, who was on the verge of failing, and Rock Lee, who was also struggling. Both possessed a commendable dedication that Sakura secretly respected. She had a general fondness for Lee, although his excessive enthusiasm and appearance somewhat repelled her. Naruto was deemed a nuisance, and inexplicably, he was scorned by the villagers of Konoha. Sakura's parents would even flinch at the mention of his name, never explaining the reason, despite her complaints about his foolishness.

Time at the Academy flew by, with friendships and bonds constantly evolving. Ino, once Sakura's closest friend, had turned into her fiercest competitor for Sasuke's attention. The loss of her dear friend over a boy, and their rivalry to outdo each other, often pained Sakura. Consequently, she found solace in her growing friendship with Hinata. Hinata's gentle nature allowed Sakura to share her feelings without fear of judgment. Despite Hinata's unwavering support, they disagreed on one point: Naruto's character. To Hinata, Naruto was nothing short of extraordinary, someone who could do no wrong in her eyes, to the point of swooning in his presence. Sakura, however, remained disgruntled by Hinata's admiration, which Hinata attributed to a time when Naruto defended her. Nevertheless, Sakura resolved to commend Hinata whenever possible, a small gesture for a friend who had enriched her Academy experience.

In the last week of classes, teams were assigned based on various factors, with no room for requests or changes. Iruka, who was firm in his decisions, assigned the teams. Sakura was thrilled to be teamed up with Sasuke but dismayed to find she was also paired with Naruto. Her emotions swung between joy and apprehension, yet she managed to offer an apologetic smile to Hinata, who was grouped with Shino and Kiba. Shino was the quiet type, barely noticeable, while Kiba was nearly as boisterous as Naruto. They were instructed to sit together and acquaint themselves. Naruto saw this as an opportunity to share his love for ramen, particularly from Ichiraku. As he praised ramen's virtues, Sakura rolled her eyes at Hinata, who gazed at Naruto with a mournful yearning. Hinata's sensei arrived first, and as she left the room, she kept her eyes on Naruto until the very end. Hinata's smile faltered when she realized Naruto's attention was entirely on Sakura, oblivious to Hinata's feelings. With a heavy heart and fingers twisting her hair sadly, Hinata followed an exuberant Kiba out. Sakura, frustrated by Naruto's lack of awareness at Hinata's departure, punched him.

"Idiot," she whispered under her breath as the classroom gradually emptied.

Eventually, Naruto ran out of ramen tales to share. Sakura's attempts at conversing with Sasuke were met with monosyllabic replies and abrupt gestures until he resorted to broodingly gazing out the window, ignoring her. Naruto's restlessness grew; he paced and fidgeted, voicing his concern that they were not assigned a sensei. The idea to prank their absent sensei struck him. Sasuke, witnessing this, clicked his tongue in disapproval. Sakura's reasonable efforts to dissuade Naruto devolved into shouting threats, which he gleefully ignored. Frustrated, she finally exhaled a sigh of surrender.

“Our sensei is an elite shinobi Naruto. They’re not going to fall for a stupid eraser prank.”

“We’ll see.” Naruto said smugly and sat down to wait, his eager expression fixed on the door.

XX

Time flew by for Kakashi, and the annual Academy graduation neared. Another year, another team he expected to fail, so he could resume his solo missions. On the day he was to meet his new students, he visited the cenotaph, as was his custom. It was a moment for reflection, regret, and mourning—a self-imposed penance for past transgressions. He conversed with Obito and Rin, his parents, Minato, and Kushina. He expressed remorse for his errors and shared updates about Naruto with Minato and Kushina. Naruto was a struggling student, yet persistent, much like his father had beenin his earliest academy days. Kakashi preemptively sought Minato's pardon for failing his son and asked for forgiveness. He expressed gratitude to Rin and Obito for their companionship, and to Minato and Kushina for their unwavering love. To his father, he offered no thanks, but endeavored to forgive. Releasing the bitterness was still challenging after all these years. He concluded, as he always did, with tender words for a mother he scarcely recalled, holding onto the hope that she was watching over him still.

Observing the sun's position, he smiled contentedly. With haste, he could reduce his tardiness to two hours instead of the usual three. He wondered whether Iruka had informed the trio destined to be his team of his habitual tardiness. As he entered the classroom, where only three students lingered, an eraser struck the top of his head without ceremony, releasing a small cloud of chalk.

“Hmmm...how do I put this? My first impression of you is...I hate you.”

He observed Naruto erupting into boisterous laughter, gesturing at the chalk dusting his vest and hair. Sasuke Uchiha tried to maintain a facade of disinterest, yet Kakashi discerned his mirth in the slight quirk of his lips. Kakashi's gaze drifted to Sakura, her expression one of sheer dismay. A knot formed in his stomach as he locked eyes with the young girl, witnessing her cheeks bloom with color as his single eye met her gaze.

“I’m sorry, se-sensei! I tried to stop him!”

Kakashi was at a loss for words. Not one to speak much, he often played the role of a silent observer amid the boisterous antics and loud conversations of his peers and friends. But now, he found himself mute, his voice swallowed by the turmoil of his inner conflict. Shock washed over him as he locked eyes with his student, silencing years of self-blame. A surge of inexplicable joy overwhelmed him as he noted her features: rosy cheeks, a wide forehead, a petite and almost fragile frame, light pink hair, and vibrant green eyes. Yet, a profound sadness settled in, realizing she had entered his life too late. She was much younger than he had allowed himself to hope for, and the recognition of his buried hopes tightened his chest.

His thoughts instinctively drifted to the scant memories he had of his mother and father together. They were soulmates, seemingly a flawless union. Those recollections were filled with a joy he hadn't felt since his early childhood, and he resented recalling that warmth right now.

"Hey, sensei!" His trance was interrupted by a hand waving in front of his face. Naruto was shouting at him.

Kakashi blinked, settling into his usual slouch with a lazy expression. He turned and exited the room, expecting them to follow as he pondered his thoughts. Sakura Haruno—what did he truly know about the girl? Barely 12, she had high test scores but showed scant practical skills. He was inclined to dismiss her, even if they passed the bell test. He had sought Iruka's candid evaluation of the trio, valuing his opinion above others. Iruka had commended Sakura's intellect and theoretical knowledge but hesitated, admitting she often seemed more preoccupied with Sasuke's attention than becoming a proficient shinobi. He believed in her potential but questioned whether she would advance beyond chunin without shifting her focus from Sasuke and other trivial pursuits.

His glare intensified at the idea of the Uchiha and Sakura together. Both young, they would train, fight, and inevitably depend on each other in the near future. Romantic entanglements between teammates were not uncommon, yet they were strongly discouraged. Iruka indicated her fondness for the raven-haired youth, who seemed unmoved by her affections. Kakashi suppressed the sense of satisfaction this realization brought.

Atop the roof where he led them, he prompted them to articulate their aspirations and objectives as shinobi. It was a routine inquiry for each team, yet he had seldom heeded their responses. What was the point if their fate was to fail? However, this occasion was different; he paid keen attention. Naruto's ambition to become Hokage was nearly commendable, and given his lineage, not entirely unattainable. Kakashi experienced a twinge of remorse pondering the drive behind Naruto's aspiration. The boy had known little kindness, save from Iruka and the Third, and craved the recognition and acceptance that had eluded him. Kakashi postponed dealing with his own guilt. Sasuke's vendetta, presumably against his missing-nin brother, was troubling. Following that path promised no positive outcome, yet Kakashi recognized in Sasuke the same fervent determination and self-control he once possessed. He empathized. His gaze lingered on Sakura as she hesitated, toying with a pebble, seemingly reconsidering her spontaneous answer. Was she about to confess her fixation on Sasuke? He awaited her reply with impatience, hopeful she would rise above his expectations.

“I, uh…can you ask me another time, sensei?” She managed at last, casting a brief apologetic glance before her eyes fell back to her feet.

He let it go, considering it a positive thing that she might be reconsidering her decisions. “Maa Sakura, feel free to let me know whenever you are ready.”

With that, he dismissed them for the day, instructing them to meet at one of the training grounds the next morning. As the sun set, casting orange hues across the sky, he was reminded that he hadn't eaten for hours. On his way home, he stopped at Ichiraku and ordered miso soup and an eggplant dish, a treat he reserved for after challenging missions. There, he encountered Naruto and listened politely as the boy excitedly shared his aspirations of becoming Hokage. The break in routine brought Kakashi a wave of affection for the boy who bore a strong resemblance to his cherished sensei. Exiting, he tousled Naruto's hair, eliciting an indignant puff from the boy, but Kakashi noticed the surprise and delight in his expression at the rare gesture. For once, Kakashi found himself hoping that a team might succeed, regardless of Sakura's significance to him.

XX

As Sakura's gaze fell upon Kakashi for the first time, her heart began to race. She couldn't understand why she was suddenly unable to tear her eyes away from him. "His hair looks soft," she thought, even as she instinctively betrayed Naruto's antics. She could barely see his face, obscured by his mask and forehead protector, but she had the impression that his exposed eye could peer straight into her soul. Her cheeks warmed with a blush, certain that she looked foolish with her expression inadvertently fixed in place. Yet, he seemed equally captivated, as much as she could discern with most of his face hidden. Was it wishful thinking, or delusion?

Naruto managed to snap their sensei out of his daze, and the man departed promptly without introducing himself. They trailed him, puzzled, to the rooftop. She realized it was already dinner time and they had been left waiting for hours by their tardy sensei. Was he returning from a mission? Was he injured? Did he dislike her? Dismissing these thoughts, she concentrated as their new sensei introduced himself as Kakashi Hatake. Sakura recalled Iruka mentioning him, known for his ability to copy jutsu. She observed him intently as he paid attention to Naruto and Sasuke, annoyed by the mask and forehead protector obscuring most of his face. Feeling suddenly self-conscious when his gaze turned to her, she lowered her head. Her hobbies, likes, and aspirations? Sasuke's image sprang to mind, bringing a wave of shame and guilt. What had once felt natural now seemed trivial before this Jounin, her sensei. What about him made her second-guess herself? Unable to meet his gaze, she struggled to find a suitable response, but her mind was blank. Fantasizing about a future with Sasuke, proving her worth as a kunoichi, and marrying him. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He appeared indifferent to her silence, which relieved her. She resolved to come up with an answer and would share it confidently next time.

The bell test proved to be unexpectedly challenging, and she felt humiliated when her unwavering devotion to Sasuke was revealed. Being subjected to that particular genjutsu was mortifying. She wondered what Kakashi's opinion was of her juvenile infatuation and hoped his disdain for her had faded. She was determined to demonstrate her strength as a shinobi; failure was not an option. Despite their own conflicts with each other, they succeeded, and her elation was undeniable. She was officially a genin! That evening, she chronicled the day's events in her diary, choosing to overlook the excessive praise she heaped upon Kakashi.

XX

Soulmates. Kakashi contemplated the significance of the term now that he was confronted with the unthinkable, particularly in the form of Sakura Haruno. He refrained from delving too deeply into the whirlwind of emotions that had arisen around her. A sense of protectiveness was natural for a Hatake, given their deep connection with their ninken. Shared traits and unbreakable bonds developed over time. This protectiveness was manageable; she was under his care, and his duty was to nurture her into a formidable shinobi. He was determined to keep it under control. If there was one trait that had persisted from his youth, it was self-discipline when necessary. He could fulfill the roles of both her soulmate and team captain, provided she remained unaware of their bond.

He contemplated revealing the situation to the Third and asking for a new team. Given the circumstances, it was a sensible consideration. However, teams were meticulously chosen, and Sakura's departure might lead to Sasuke and Naruto being reassigned, though it seemed improbable. Besides, who was more qualified to mentor the last Uchiha than himself? He'd had uncovered a latent fondness for Minato's son. In all good conscience, he couldn't withdraw once more. A silent vow had been made to Naruto, and he intended to honor it.

He chose a cowardly tactic with Sakura. He favored the boys over her, and watched her confusion grow with each passing mission as he focused on Naruto and Sasuke’s training. Not that he would ever neglect her. He could do no less than ensure that she never died like Rin or Obito. No, he just withheld the hair ruffles he forced on the boys, as well as limiting praise and unnecessary interaction. Perhaps it seemed that he was never satisfied with Sakura, and it pained him to see her confusion turn to hurt and bitter resolve. It would be better if she’d resented or grew to hate him instead. He told himself that it was good that she didn't become attached to him, so she would not suspect. He was careful never to make skin contact and hardly spoke to her if they weren’t on a mission.

Kakashi found himself dedicating more free time to Naruto, who received his attention with the enthusiasm of a young pup. He was grateful for Naruto's unassuming nature, which never questioned the abundance of time his sensei invested in him, accepting it with joy. Occasionally, they would share a bowl of ramen, though Kakashi was careful not to encroach on the tradition Iruka had established with Naruto over the years. Instead, he preferred to regale Naruto with tales of his own sensei and former team, always ensuring Minato featured in the narratives. It wasn't a complete solution, but it helped Naruto gradually come to know and esteem his father, albeit unknowingly.

Sasuke also required Kakashi's guidance for training, always pushing to improve so that he could confront Itachi as an equal and defeat him. Kakashi sought methods to divert Sasuke's aggression but had not yet discovered an effective way to steer him away from his overpowering desire for vengeance. He suggested Icha Icha, his personal method for channeling excess energy, which Sasuke dismissed and ridiculed. Sasuke even went so far as to insult the revered Jiraiya, calling his work "filth," an affront Kakashi could not forgive. Kakashi once inquired if Sasuke had any romantic interests, thinking that an adolescent crush might serve as a diversion. Sasuke's gaze settled on Sakura as she trained with Naruto, but he denied such distractions. Kakashi sensed an unintended interest and chose not to mention it again. Sakura was off-limits to the Uchiha. Sakura was his.

Sakura never mentioned her goals and hobbies again, although he frequently noticed her biting her lip thoughtfully during calmer moments. He refrained from pressing the matter as he observed her disdain for Naruto transform into reluctant admiration, and Sasuke's lingering gaze continued to provoke a nervous blush from her.

As the weeks and months flew by, Kakashi diligently prepared his team for the chunin exams. He was confident in their ability to succeed, yet he harbored a knot of concern for Sakura amidst the hostility she might face. He trusted Sasuke and Naruto to protect her at all costs, their bond with Team 7 transcending mere camaraderie to that of close friends. Despite this, reassurance eluded him, and as he bid them good luck and observed their departure, he felt compelled to offer Sakura a parting word.

"Sakura!" She spun around at the sound of his voice, her eyes wide with surprise and caution as she anticipated his words. Naruto and Sasuke were already a good distance ahead, heading towards the gates, oblivious to his call or the fact that Sakura had stopped following them. He moved towards her with deliberate steps, eye crinkling to match his gentle smile. "Don't worry so much. You'll do just fine," he reassured her.

He had to say something when he noticed the worry etched into her brow, born from her fear of not being good enough, not as adept as Naruto or Sasuke. Kakashi lamented his inability to reassure her that she might never attain their level of prowess, but it wouldn't be her fault. Naruto was the son of the Fourth Hokage and the most formidable Jinchuuriki. Sasuke hailed from one of Konoha's founding clans and was marked for greatness since birth. Sakura possessed her own unique potential for greatness, yet she had to realize it on her own.

Sakura flinched, taken aback as his gloved hand gently landed on her head, playfully tousling her hair. She looked up at him with wide eyes, her gaze filled with a longing for reassurance and the acceptance she believed he had always withheld. "Sensei?"

"Maa, Sakura, you are just as capable as any of those genin. Remember that," he said. With a movement almost too quick to catch, he gently tucked a stray hair behind her ear. Sakura's cheeks warmed, and she instinctively turned her face towards his hand, only to find it had already retreated. He took a step back, and she followed his movements with careful eyes. "Now go, before Naruto and Sasuke start without you."

Determination sparked in Sakura's eyes as she nodded firmly, her fists clenched. "Yes, sensei!" Her smile, fierce and resolute, resembled a grimace as she locked eyes with his. "I won't let you down, Kakashi-sensei!" With her vow made, she spun around and dashed off, catching the attention of Naruto and Sasuke who had just realized she was missing. Kakashi observed the boys converge around her, likely inquiring about their earlier conversation. They had perceived his aloofness towards Sakura, yet they simply chalked it up to her being a girl.

Kakashi whispered to himself, "You've never let me down, Sakura. You never could."

Chapter Text

Sasuke departed from the village, despite Kakashi's best efforts. Similarly, Naruto left to train with Jiraiya, leaving Sakura alone with her lazy sensei. She deeply missed both boys and felt a profound sadness over Sasuke's exit, his motives ever elusive to her. Naruto, once a mere annoyance, had grown to be like a brother to her, and his absence was keenly felt each day. Sakura felt guilty for not having introduced Hinata to Naruto during their time as teammates, and to compensate, she often spent time with Hinata. The girl's unwavering devotion to Naruto only deepened her melancholy in his absence, despite their lack of close acquaintance.

She and Ino were mending their friendship after the chunin exam events and their subsequent disqualifications. Initially, it was a slow and awkward process as they attempted to converse without falling into an argument. The company of Tenten and Hinata often helped ease the tension. It was during one of their gatherings that they broached the topic of boys for the first time since their days at the Academy.

“Hey, fore-, uh Sakura! Are you still in love with Sasuke?” Ino asked her as she painted her nails. Tenten paused in painting Hinata’s toenails a light lavender and nodded her head in agreement with the question.

Sakura was prepared to instantly dismiss any notion of affection for Sasuke, yet she hesitated, contemplating her response. "I don't love him," she began. "I think I never truly did. My feelings were closer to obsession, much like yours, Ino."

Ino shrugged. "He was the most handsome in the Academy and always had this mysterious, cool aura." She glanced up from her nails to observe Sakura intently. "If Sasuke isn't the one for you, is there someone else who has caught your attention?"

Kakashi, was her knee-jerk response. Sakura frowned at the thought, wondering where it had come from. She shook her head in denial, but her thoughts focused on her sensei who she’d begun to miss as much as Naruto. It had been a while since they had sat down for their regular lunches.

The absence of the boys had significantly improved their relationship, yet she always felt a deliberate distance that Kakashi maintained between them. He was not one to talk much, except, strangely, with Naruto, and he had always been more affectionate towards the boys. Since the day of the chunin exams, when she had desperately sought reassurance, he had not touched her again. The memory of his fingers brushing against her ear lingered in her dreams for weeks, often leaving her waking with a profound sense of solace.

“You’re lying,” Ino announced definitively. “It’s okay, I’ll tell you mine and maybe you’ll feel comfortable enough to tell me who you like.”

Tenten rolled her eyes. “How generous of you Ino.” Sarcasm dripped from her voice. It was obvious that Ino had only asked Sakura, so she could speak about herself.

“Yes, isn’t it,” Ino sniffed. “I like Kiba!” At Hinata’s small gasp, she grinned. “What? He’s a good-looking guy and his fangs and face paint do something for me.”

“He doesn’t have fangs!” Sakura groaned. “His incisors are just a little longer than usual.”

“Fangs, incisors; to-may-to, to-mah-to. It’s all the same.” Ino said smugly.

“He smells like wet dog,” Tenten said with a grimace. “Besides, Hinata said his soulmate tattoo wasn’t the same as any of ours.”

Ino sighed dramatically at the news. “You know, I’m so sick of soulmarks. Why couldn’t I have found my soulmate the same as Kurenai-sensei and Asuma-sensei did?”

Sakura raised an eyebrow at Hinata curiously. “I know you’ve seen my soulmark, but how do you know everyone else’s?”

“I think we all had the same idea,” Tenten shrugged her shoulders. “Hinata is a great listener.”

Hinata gave a feeble nod, her cheeks flushed with a deep blush as all eyes turned to her. "Ino bears an ink bird on her shoulder, Tenten sports a tiny dragon on her abdomen, and Sakura carries a cherry blossom tree across her back."

Ino and Tenten snickered at Sakura's soulmark, earning a sharp glare from her. "Hinata, I've never seen your soulmark. Has one appeared yet?" Sakura inquired, her curiosity evident. The last time they had discussed it, Hinata had yet to manifest a soulmark. But that didn't necessarily mean anything. Sakura was an anomaly for having a soulmark upon reaching puberty, which probably indicated that her soulmate was a few years older. Typically soulmates were very close in age. That fact no longer troubled her as much as it once did, especially since her infatuation with Sasuke had faded.

Hinata's face flushed with color, and she appeared at a loss for words. In response she tugged down her skirt on her left hip. Ino squealed in anticipation as Sakura watched in curiosity. Modesty wasn’t applicable in a shinobi’s life. If there weren’t public bathhouses, then it was just something that was set aside early as genins. Sakura would need both hands to count how many times she’d glimpsed the boys in some state of undress. She’d even seen Naruto’s ass on two separate occasions. The memory made her shudder, but her thoughts soon turned to Kakashi. She had seldom seen him out of his full Jounin uniform. Even when injured, he would dismiss their concerns and delay a hospital visit. The first time they saw him in just his sleeveless undershirt, revealing his faded Anbu tattoo, they were all struck with awe. Sakura's gaze lingered on the lean but sculpted muscles of his biceps, which seemed much larger without the concealing sleeves. While he wasn't as muscular as Asuma, she found the view quite pleasing. That was the first time she’d woken with an ache between her legs. And it was over Kakashi’s arms no less! Sakura dismissed the thought, feeling relieved that she went unnoticed as everyone's attention was on Hinata's soulmark.

Sakura pushed Ino aside to get a better view. She marveled at the expansive sun that dominated Hinata's hip and extended over a large portion of her upper thigh. The sun, painted in hues of orange and yellow, featured a swirling pattern at its center. As Sakura scrutinized the design, it struck her as similar to the emblem found on Jounin vests, and it bore an even closer resemblance to the curse mark on Naruto's stomach.

"Whoa," Tenten exclaimed in awe. "That's quite the impressive soulmark. My dragon is tiny in comparison." She lifted her shirt to reveal her own dragon, adorned with green scales and a vibrant orange underbelly.

“That’s nothing!” Ino announced smugly. “Look at mine!” She quickly discarded her shirt and shrugged off her bra, to reveal her full tattoo. She twirled and extended her arms. A bird, seemingly painted in black ink, was centered on her right shoulder, its wingspan reaching across her collarbone to her shoulder blade.

Tenten whistled, her features a mix of envy and wonder. "That's a good one," she conceded.

"Sakura's is the largest," Hinata suggested timidly.

Tenten and Ino turned to Sakura, their eyes accusing and eyebrows raised. "Where and how?" they both demanded. They’d both seen her naked after all.

Sakura shrugged. "I suppose it's the same for you two, as I've never seen either of those marks at the bathhouse. I mastered covering it with genjutsu almost immediately. It's too large to conceal by conventional methods if I need to be shirtless for any reason."

“Let’s see it!” Ino demanded impatiently, already pulling at Sakura’s clothing.

“Ino-pig!” Sakura shoved the blonde girl away indignantly.

As the three girls' gazes fixed on Sakura, she was engulfed by a wave of anxiety. She had never encountered a mark as prominent as her own. She had observed the faint marks of her mother and father, yet they were negligible in size compared to hers. There was a reason she always kept it concealed.

She pulled off her shirt reluctantly and turned around, unwrapping her chest bindings slowly as they stared. Tenten and Ino huffed in impatience as they saw nothing. Sakura swallowed hard, steadying her nerves. For a moment there was silence then two strangled gasps as she released the genjutsu she’d implemented automatically when she’d taken her shirt off.

“Sakura!” Ino squeaked, “It’s huuge.”

“I know,” Sakura said. “Do you see why I keep it hidden?”

"The amount of chakra required to sustain even such a basic jutsu must be draining," Tenten remarked softly.

Sakura adjusted her shirt and turned around. She pulled at her high collar. "That's the reason I choose this style of shirt—it covers part of my neck too. If not, I would constantly be at risk of chakra exhaustion."

"You've hit the jackpot!" Ino exclaimed. "Your soulmate is going to absolutely adore you!"

Sakura felt a sinking feeling as she briefly considered Kakashi. Rumors had circulated that he was among the few of his generation to remain without a mark. Not that it mattered. He would never regard her in that light, and somewhere, she had a soulmate who would cherish her.

"Are you alright, Sakura?" Hinata asked gently.

Sakura offered a consoling smile. "Yeah, I guess I'm just exhausted."

Hinata looked at her with worry but acknowledged her answer. "It's getting late. You all should probably head home."

She gently touched Tenten and Ino on the shoulders, halting their heated debate over who possessed the superior soulmark. "Sakura is exhausted. It would be best to conclude our evening," Hinata declared with unusual assertiveness.

They readily agreed with Hinata's tone and left through the door, continuing their debate over their soulmarks. As Hinata began cleaning up the mess left behind, Sakura observed, amused, that only seven of Hinata's toes were painted.

"Come on, Hinata, let's start by taking care of your toes."

Hinata glanced down at her feet and let out a giggle. "That sounds lovely. Thank you."

They remained silent for a while as Sakura meticulously applied polish to Hinata's last three toes, then waited patiently for the polish to dry.

"Can you keep a secret?" Sakura inquired of Hinata, fully aware that Hinata would take such confidences to her grave rather than betray a friend's trust.

"I won't tell a soul," Hinata vowed solemnly.

"I don't know who my soulmate might be," Sakura sighed. "Yet, ever since I met him, I've hoped it would be Kakashi."

"Kakashi-sensei?" Hinata murmured, her eyes darting around as though expecting him to emerge from the shadows at any moment.

"Yeah," Sakura murmured, "and the foolish part is, sometimes I believe he wishes it too."

She reminisced about the moment of their first encounter, both rendered silent, perhaps for differing reasons. She recalled the touch of gloved fingers against her ear and the pressure of his hand in her hair that haunted her dreams. She considered the tension in their relationship and Kakashi's deliberate avoidance of physical contact, but only with her. His contradictory actions could drive her to distraction. At times, she noticed him looking at her with a seemingly longing expression in his dark eye, yet she often persuaded herself it was all in her imagination.

"Sakura, he is fourteen years older than you. He's an adult, and you're still a child," Hinata said, her voice apologetic and on the verge of tears.

“I know!” Sakura groaned. “I know, I know, I know. That’s what I tell myself all the time. It’s not about sex,” she asserted. Despite her intensely vivid dreams about him, she said, "He makes me feel secure. Whenever I look at him, I'm filled with a sense that nothing could harm me."

“Kurenai-sensei makes me feel very safe,” Hinata said, struggling to understand for her friend’s sake.

"It's more than that," Sakura groaned, her frustration palpable. How could she possibly convey the myriad of emotions and the profound connection she had felt with Kakashi since the beginning? "He's like home to me, Hinata. When I'm with him, I'm home."

Hinata remained silent for a short while, her brow creased in thought. Then, she offered Sakura a gentle smile. "You'll reach adulthood in just over two years, Sakura. It's not such a long wait. Fourteen and twenty-eight may appear to be a large gap now, but seventeen and thirty-one won't seem as significant if he's truly your soulmate. My father was eleven years older than my mother before she passed away. Ino's mother is nine years younger than her father, and they're genuinely happy."

Sakura laughed, tears streaming down her face at Hinata's immediate acceptance and support. "You're right, Hinata. It's not too long."

Hinata caught Sakura off guard with a hug, yet Sakura held onto her tightly. "Thank you for telling me."

"Thank you for listening, Hinata. I'm confident that once Naruto comes to his senses, he'll quickly recognize how amazing you are."

"I hope so," Hinata said, her smile tinged with longing. Then, with a playful glint in her eye, she added, "If you were just a bit less attractive, maybe I'd stand a chance."

"Hinata!" exclaimed Sakura in feigned shock. They both erupted into laughter, with tears of joy gathering in Hinata's eyes.

XX

More than a week had passed since he last saw Sakura. He attempted to reduce the time they spent together, yet found it increasingly difficult to keep his distance. Sakura was always ready to make time for him, even willing to interrupt her current activities to share a meal. Even abandoning Lee during what seemed to be their first date.

Lee had urged her to go when Sakura turned back to look at him, her expression laden with guilt. "Please, Sakura, don't fret over me! Training with your sensei is the most important thing in the world!" He had flashed her his signature thumbs up, and she had chuckled at his enthusiasm.

“Thanks Lee! I promise we’ll try again soon.”

They walked side by side in comfortable silence, Sakura thoughtfully biting her lower lip. Kakashi mouth dried at the sight of her teeth worrying her lip until it was pink and moist. Bad Kakashi. Very bad.

“How old are you now, Sakura?”

She looked at him with curiosity. "Fourteen, sensei.""Ahh," he said, rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment over his ignorance, having avoided the thought of their age difference. "So, has Lee caught your attention?"

Sakura's cheeks turned pink at the unexpected suggestion. He had never brought up her past fixation with Sasuke, although she was certain it had been obvious. "Lee is kind, sensei. He makes me smile," she said. She wound a strand of hair around her finger, a considering expression in her eyes that he occasionally observed. Glancing at him with a moment's hesitation, she asked, "Does that make you jealous, Kakashi?"

Kakashi's eyes widened, his heart skipping a beat at the knowing look in her eyes. He managed a chuckle, reaching out to casually ruffle her hair. "Maa, Sakura-chan, you're still too young to drop the honorific. Show respect for your elders."

Sakura appeared ready to slap his hand away, feeling hurt and irritated due to his casual dismissal of her question. "What if I do like Lee? He's kinder to me than my dumb sensei!" she exclaimed. With that, she turned sharply and stomped off, her fists clenched in anger, overwhelmed by humiliation.

So young, Kakashi mused, so easily riled, but he had to acknowledge her honesty. Lee's adoration for Sakura was no secret, nor was his wish for her to bear his matching soulmark. In contrast to Kakashi, Lee had always treated her with utmost respect, eager to assist, and quick to commend her talents and beauty. Next to him, Kakashi felt like a heartless monster. He wondered how often he had been the cause of her tears, and still, she harbored affection for him. Could the soulmark be swaying her feelings? If he withdrew, would she then erase him from her heart and move on with her life?

His love for her was undeniable. He would sacrifice his life for hers without hesitation, but he was broken and scarred and burned out. He feared that his darkness would eventually extinguish the brightness of her carefree smile, drawing her into the depths of his own despair. She had not been shaped by the same harsh realities he had faced, constantly battling and bleeding for Konoha, witnessing the death of loved ones. She was not as untouched as a civilian, having experienced the weight of taking lives. He had felt an overwhelming urge to embrace her, to offer solace after her first kill, knowing the profound impact it had. However, he had stepped back, allowing Naruto to be her comfort as she wept. Kakashi had resolved that it was not his place to console her, a stark reminder of the gulf between them. At half her age, he had coldly taken a life with his kunai, conditioned to feel nothing. No comfort was offered to him, nor expected. Despite their team's achievements, they remained young and inexperienced, and he struggled daily to see Sakura in a paternal light, only to fail miserably.

He’d caught himself watching her slim toned legs as she fought, staring too long at the small swell of her breasts hidden under her high-necked shirt. Her face had shed its childish roundness, and she was growing into her forehead. Lean and muscled, she was on the path to becoming an exemplary kunoichi. And he was a sick, old pervert for the race of his heart when her shirt lifted enough for him to glimpse her pale toned abdomen. Where had his self-discipline gone? The softness of her hair left his hand tingling, and the unique scent of Sakura lingered in his nostrils. It was a fragrance of blossoms and spring, of warmth, happiness, and everything that felt like home.

XX

Tears welled up as Sakura returned to Lee, who was still savoring his dinner solo, her own plate half-eaten across from him. She brushed the corner of her eyes in frustration and inhaled deeply, forcing a smile as she neared him.

“I’m back, Lee!”

Lee's face lit up with eagerness, but his bright expression dimmed upon seeing the pained smile on her face. "Are you alright, Sakura-chan? Where did Kakashi-sensei go?"

Sakura gave a nonchalant shrug as she settled back into the seat opposite him. "He had to go," she said.

"A mission, then," Lee said with understanding. "Gai-sensei sometimes must leave our training because, as an elite Jounin, he undertakes missions we cannot accompany him on. I share in the frustration!"

"Yeah, Lee. That's it," Sakura said, sniffing and picking at the dish she had been enjoying just moments earlier.

“Forgive me Sakura, I don’t mean to pry but,” Lee hesitated. “Did you exchange harsh words with Kakashi-sensei?”

"Why do you ask?" Sakura's smile was bright yet insincere, and it was clear she wasn't deceiving Lee in the slightest.

"It's merely a guess," Lee speculated, "I don't intend to make you uncomfortable."

"It's alright, Lee," Sakura exhaled. "Perhaps you haven't realized, but Kakashi and I aren't exactly on the best of terms. He thinks I'm useless."

"That's impossible!" exclaimed Lee, alarmed. "Gai-sensei constantly says that Kakashi holds your talents in high regard. Don't you know why I admire you so much?"

Sakura’s chest swelled with hope. “Maybe he’s talking about Sasuke and Naruto.”

"No," Lee stated emphatically. "Naruto and Sasuke may be worthy adversaries, yet Kakashi seldom mentions them. Gai-sensei has told me that Kakashi-sensei's concern for you equals his concern for me!" Overcome with emotion, Lee's eyes brimmed with tears as he reminisced about his beloved sensei, who had courageously entered the arena to defend him against Gaara in the past.

Sakura ended up spending the remainder of the 'date' consoling Lee, who was distraught over Gai's absence. Ultimately, they decided to stay friends but no further romantic outings. Lee revealed his tattoo to her, a tiny ramen bowl nestled under the collar of his green jumpsuit on his neck, and she disclosed that her mark was different. He accepted this revelation with unexpected grace and wished her well in her search for her soulmate.

"Perhaps your soulmate is Naruto!" Sakura proposed, bursting into giggles.

Lee trembled with feigned terror. "I hold Naruto in high esteem, but I truly hope that's not the case!"

Sakura examined the mark intently before questioning Lee. "Tell me if I'm overstepping, but it appears that your connection with Gai-sensei goes beyond the typical teacher-student relationship. Do you have feelings for Gai-sensei?"

Lee appeared utterly astonished by the suggestion. "Sakura, you've completely—or at least partially—misunderstood our relationship! It's true that Gai-sensei is not merely my sensei. He's akin to a father figure for me. I hold him in esteem and affection as one would for a father, if I had the chance to know mine."

Sakura's face flushed a deep red, mirroring her shirt. "I'm sorry, Lee! I didn't mean to imply..."

"It's okay, Sakura. You can understand the bond, can't you? Naruto often says that he sees Iruka-sensei as the father he never had and Kakashi as his eccentric uncle. Don't you also feel that Kakashi is like family to you?"

"It's different for me," Sakura said cautiously. "I have a father and mother who love me dearly." The unspoken comparison to Lee and Naruto lingered in the air. "I could never view him as a father figure," she admitted, the thought alone was unsettling given the nature of some dreams she had about the man. Nor could she see him as an uncle or even a big brother. "I suppose he's like family to me," she concluded with some reservation. Maybe her future husband, if she allowed herself to entertain the idea.

"See!" exclaimed Lee triumphantly. "Our teams are more than just teams; they're families. Did you know Asuma-sensei has named Shikamaru as the godfather of his unborn child?"

"Wow, that's really cool!" Sakura exclaimed, her smile broadening as she steered the conversation away from her opinions about Kakashi and their relationship.

Lee escorted her home, as a true gentleman would, and bid her goodnight with a tender kiss on her cheek. Sakura clasped her flushed cheeks with both hands, beaming at the retreating figure of the chivalrous Lee. How she wished he were her soulmate; it would have simplified her life immensely.

She entered the building, unaware of Kakashi observing them from the rooftop across the street, his eye clouded with resignation.

XX

Kakashi and Sakura continued their training together due to the lack of other sparring partners. When Kakashi was away on missions, Hinata or Lee sometimes joined her, leaving their own teams temporarily. With their assistance, Sakura significantly enhanced her taijutsu skills. The trio also shared a common bond through their feelings of inadequacy: Lee's relentless ambition to surpass Neji despite his inability to use ninjutsu or genjutsu, Hinata's worry that she was not living up to her family's expectations, and Sakura's self-doubt when measuring herself against Naruto or Sasuke.

Kakashi arrived home from a mission and detected the scents of Sakura, Lee, and Hinata. The idea that they might be on another date irked him, and Hinata's presence only added to his confusion. He followed their trail to the training grounds and observed, with quiet curiosity, the trio lounging on the grass at the field's perimeter.

"Come on, Sakura, I have no idea who my soulmate is, but it's definitely not Naruto!" Lee's voice echoed loudly across the room as he indignantly protested against Sakura's teasing.

"Who else could love ramen as much as him? No one!" Sakura chuckled at Lee's frown. "Come on, Lee, you know I'm just joking. After all, it's clear that Naruto's soulmate is Hinata."

Kakashi observed intently as a blush spread across Hinata's face upon hearing the suggestion. "Sakura, that's not confirmed! Please don't spread rumors. If Naruto finds out..." Overwhelmed, the Hyuga heiress flipped onto her stomach, burying her face in her arms, likely overwhelmed with embarrassment.

“Well maybe Naruto should hear!” Sakura said hotly. “You’ve loved him for years and he’s still completely oblivious. That idiot.” The insult softened by a deep-rooted affection.

"Hinata has already encountered the joy of young love?" Lee inquired with excitement. "We should proclaim this from the treetops in jubilation!" With that, he leapt up, eager to ascend the tallest tree and do exactly as he proposed.

"No, Lee-san!" implored Hinata. "It's not certain that Naruto and I have the same soulmark. It's merely Sakura's suspicion, based on my feelings."

"I see," Lee said, sitting down heavily with a frown. "Wait, I don't quite understand. How could Sakura make any assumptions unless she feels the same?" Kakashi watched tensely as Hinata sat up, her eyes wide, silently pleading for Sakura's forgiveness. Lee, finally understanding, asked in amazement, "Are you in love too, Sakura?"

"No," Sakura swiftly dismissed the assumption, causing Kakashi's heart to tighten with sorrow. “I can’t be. He’s lazy and rude and he’s always late to everything.” Her voice broke. "He's always, always shown more care for Naruto and Sasuke than for me. How can I love someone who makes me feel invisible most of the time?"

"Oh, Sakura!" Hinata pulled her close, gently stroking Sakura's pink hair to comfort her as she wept quietly, while Lee gazed at them, looking as if he had been struck in the face with a wok.

"It's just not fair, Hinata," Sakura lamented. "I just want to forget him!"

“You’re in love with Kakashi-sensei?”

"Shut up, Lee!" The girls' voices echoed in unison, seizing the moment of distraction, Kakashi made his escape. Hinata noticed his departure over Sakura's shoulder and frowned.

XX

Kakashi made his way to the cenotaph, as was his habit when burdened by heavy thoughts. He offered his usual salutations to Obito, Rin, Minato, and Kushina before sinking to his knees with a thud. What was he doing? From the beginning, he should have made the decision to transfer Sakura from his team. It was evident that his choice was causing anguish for both of them. Sakura was too young to bear such heartache, and he held himself responsible.

How could he make this better? They had become too close, and he’d failed in his attempts to drive her away.

"What should I do, Rin? You were always the level-headed one, more so than Obito or myself." He traced her name, its outline gradually disappearing from the repeated motion. "I miss you more than you could ever imagine. Why couldn't you have been my soulmate? It would have spared Obito and you so much pain. Things would have been simpler." And maybe he wouldn't feel this profound solitude. Could he have saved her if she had been his?

He sighed, realizing that Rin being his soulmate would not have altered their fate. Obito would have continued to love her until his last breath, and she would never have returned his feelings. Obito would have met his end alone, despite Rin's presence to comfort him in his final moments. Rin, too, would have come to resent him, soulmates or not. He couldn't have accepted her. It took years for him to let go of his anger. She would have died just as solitary as Obito, and Kakashi would have remained oblivious to the joy his parents had known.

He never imagined he could experience such joy. Seeing Sakura happy, witnessing her smile, was the most elated he had ever felt. Yet, he fought the impulse to bask in her radiance, convincing himself he was unworthy of it. Not now, not ever. 

"Who is Rin?" Sakura's voice startled him out of his reverie.

He stood up, brushing off his knees before turning his gaze to her. Sakura's eyes remained puffy from the tears she had shed, her cheeks flushed and blotchy. In essence, despite appearing disheveled, she was no less beautiful.

"She loved me," Kakashi lied smoothly, "and I was forced to kill her when we were younger than you are now."

Sakura recoiled at his blunt tone. "And did you love her?" she asked.

No, I couldn’t. Not when I was waiting for you. “I could have. I wish I had.” Kakashi watched the words completely crush her.

Sakura's hands clutched the front of her shirt as she fell to the ground. "Why?" It wasn't a question of why he could love another, but why he couldn't love Sakura. Why didn't he want his soulmate who likely stood right before him? Instead, he grieved for a girl who had passed away before Sakura had even been born. He didn't choose her, he didn't want Sakura. "Why, Kakashi?"

"There are several reasons, Sakura," You're too young, too pure, and you deserve someone better than me. He aimed to validate her deepest fears and demonstrate her insignificance to him; his intention was to shatter any feelings she harbored for him, reducing them to dust, right here and now. Yet he found himself unable to do so. In that moment, he realized the truth in his mother's words: a soulmate is the one who loves you the most. And he could no longer bring himself to hurt the one who loved him most.

He moved toward her, and she gazed at him, her green eyes wide. His gloved hand extended toward hers, and hesitantly, she placed her hand in his. He gently drew her to her feet, his hands gliding up her arms, brushing her neck, and finally cradling her face. "Sakura, what have I done to you?" he murmured. Oh, how I've hurt you.

"Nothing!" Sakura exclaimed. "All you've done is gaze at me as if I'm significant, yet your words and deeds tell a different story. You never touch me, save for once. That one instance, the sensation of your fingers through my hair haunted me for months. You never speak to me, only when absolutely necessary. It's as though you were rendered mute from our first encounter, unable to find the words. But those words are what I need, Kakashi. I need you."

Kakashi removed his headband, allowing his forehead to touch Sakura's, their skin meeting for the first time. It was as if electricity surged through his body, and he was certain he could hear the echo of chidori in his ears, akin to a chorus of a thousand birds, in harmony with the sensation of Sakura's skin against his own. 

"I'll make it better, Sakura. That's a promise," he said, removing his gloves to cradle her face gently, compelling her to meet his gaze.

"Kakashi?" Sakura's voice seemed distant, everything eclipsed by the warmth flooding her senses. Her heart swelled to the point she felt tears might come. This moment affirmed her conviction: he was her home. How could he deny them this bond? Her eyes locked onto the spinning tomoes of his Sharingan, captivated and unable to look away.

"It's okay," Kakashi soothed as she tensed up. "I'll make it better," he assured her. I just want to forget him! Don't worry, Sakura, you will.

An intricate genjutsu carried inherent risks, yet he was convinced he could help her. He would sooner sever his own limbs than cause her harm again. Kakashi recognized his grave mistakes. Sakura sought acceptance, the kind he had yearned for from his sensei and father. His failure to provide this was his misstep. He wove a tapestry of memories to lay atop of and shield her from her own.

“I’m sorry, se-sensei! I tried to stop him!” He would smile just for her, eye creasing in forgiveness.  

“My name is Sakura Haruno! I like, who I like…my hobbies include…my future dream is…” All with bashful glances at her raven-haired teammate. Sasuke Uchiha had once meant everything to her and focusing her attention onto him was a perfect substitute for her sensei.

Each time he tousled the boy's hair, Sakura was included. He could almost hear her exasperated protest to her sensei, "I'm not a child, Kakashi-sensei!"

"Kakashi?" And he told her as he had before. She was every bit as capable as those genin. He tousled her hair, just as he always did. But this time, he refrained from tucking her hair behind her ear; it was too intimate a gesture for a carefree sensei.

They went for dinner at least once a month, just him and Sakura because his time with Naruto was precious and Sasuke had always refused to join them. “What’s your favorite food, sensei?”

“Miso soup and eggplant.”

“I should have guessed sensei. Do you want to try some of my dumplings?” At his shudder, she laughed. “Too sweet? No wonder why you’re so cranky.”

“You’re in love with Sasuke?” Lee shouted, just as oblivious.

“"No," Sakura declared firmly. "How could I possibly love him? He always considered me useless and abandoned me without even looking back."

And the last. She would shed no more tears because of him. “Who is Rin, sensei?”

“My soulmate, Sakura. She died when I was younger than you are.”

“I’m sorry, sensei. I shouldn’t have intruded.”

"Maa, it's alright, Sakura," he said, offering his usual smile that suggested she refrain from asking further questions. "Now, will my favorite student treat me to dinner?"

“Of course, sensei!” He’d ordered salt broiled saury and walked her home afterwards.

Changing so much was challenging. As sweat dripped down his forehead, he concentrated on altering the memories that seemed to impact her the most, replacing them with the events he wished had occurred, so Sakura could lead a joyful life. Memory manipulation was a complex task, the most difficult genjutsu he had ever undertaken, and it was impossible without his Sharingan. He couldn't alter her emotions, but he could reshape how she recalled them. Under the spell of his Sharingan, Sakura's eyes became unfocused. Once the genjutsu was complete, he gently laid Sakura down on the ground, where she lost consciousness the moment the genjutsu was lifted.

He truly felt as if he could sleep for a hundred years. He cleaned the blood from his eye and readjusted his headband over his strained Sharingan.

"Ah, Hinata, I'm pleased to see you. And Lee! What a fortunate coincidence."

The pair gazed at him, their eyes wide with fear. "Kakashi-sensei, what happened to Sakura?" Hinata inquired courageously, advancing toward Sakura's motionless form.

"What did she ask you for, Hinata?" he inquired, sounding exhausted.

"You can't erase memories, even with the Sharingan!" Hinata quickly activated her Byakugan to examine Sakura's chakra network. All appeared normal, yet when she turned to Kakashi, she inhaled sharply. He was teetering on the brink of chakra exhaustion, and it was astonishing that he remained conscious.

"No," Kakashi concurred. "I can't erase them, but I can alter them. When she awakens, she may appear altered, but I haven't changed anything significant. Only her feelings towards me." As Hinata seemed poised to object, Kakashi lifted his hand. "I can't alter the fact that she's my soulmate, but I can adjust her focus. Hinata, it's for the best." He exhaled wearily, his head throbbing with pain. "I never claimed I was fully rejecting her, but our relationship isn't feasible at the moment. Do you wish her to continue suffering? I can't keep lying to her, and I can't reject her again, Hinata. I just can't." He endeavored to convey the sincerity of his words. Causing her pain was tantamount to inflicting it upon himself, and neither of them deserved it.

“It’s not fair!” Hinata cried.

"No, it's not," Kakashi concurred. "But as she grows older, there may come a day when this is no longer wrong. Until that time, she mustn't recall any of this. Should she appear confused about anything, reassure her. If her recollections differ, back her up. Do you understand, Hinata? Lee?"

"Sensei, are you certain this is the most prudent choice? I'm not fully aware of how the Sharingan functions, yet it appears to be a perilous path to take," Lee warned.

"It's done," Kakashi stated firmly. "And it can't be changed." He rose to his feet slowly, fingers massaging his throbbing temple. "This must remain a secret." His gaze was intense as he looked into their eyes, considering using the Sharingan to compel them, but his head pounded, and his chakra was depleted.

Hinata and Lee each gave a single, solemn nod in agreement.

"Ensure that Sakura gets home safely," Kakashi asked of them.

Lee carefully lifted Sakura, drawing her close to his chest. "I will make sure of it," he promised. With a gentle turn, he walked away, careful not to jostle her.

Hinata began to follow Lee but paused to look back at Kakashi. "Kakashi-sensei, are you going to be okay?"

Kakashi's smile was a response to her concern. "My happiness is tied to hers; if she is content, sadness has no place in me."

Hinata fought back tears as she walked away, leaving him by the cenotaph. The sight of him standing alone, one hand resting on the stone, made her heart ache. She hoped he would be able to forgive himself.

Chapter Text

Sakura believed she had reached the limits of what her sensei, Kakashi, could teach her. Despite their easy rapport, their professional relationship had plateaued. She couldn't learn the same techniques he had taught Naruto or Sasuke; her chakra levels were too low, and she lacked a Sharingan. The fear of being left behind gnawed at her, especially with Naruto's imminent return, which would undoubtedly showcase his growth. This left Sakura feeling like a burden to her sensei and friend, dreading the possibility of holding them back or putting them in danger.

Now serving as Hokage, Tsunade was also revered as one of the legendary Sannin, with her abilities commanding both fear and respect. In Naruto's absence, Sakura had taken on the role of a secretary and errand-runner, always keen to receive updates about her friend or Sasuke. Tsunade appeared to take a liking to her, often inquiring deeply about her chakra control and her commitment as a shinobi. Sakura believed that Tsunade would agree to be her mentor if she asked. However, she knew she needed to inform Kakashi first, hopeful that he would approve.

She found him kneeling before the cenotaph. After he disclosed that his soulmate had passed away in his youth, she felt it inappropriate to delve too deeply into his history with questions she was certain he wouldn't answer. Despite her reluctance, her curiosity to uncover the enigma of Kakashi Hatake persisted. She reminisced about Team 7's wager on Kakashi's appearance beneath his mask. Being first at something appealed to her, but her motivation stemmed from the affection she held for her sensei, whom she also regarded as a friend. She occasionally pondered how he perceived her. Maybe as an irritating pupil? Or as a valued comrade? It seemed more probable that he saw her as she initially saw him: a necessary companion in the absence of Naruto and Sasuke. Their weekly dinners usually unfolded in amiable quietude, or Sakura would chatter about her role as the Hokage's messenger. He seldom shared details about his life, and she refrained from prying.

Kakashi gently traced the name of Rin Nohara, murmuring softly to himself, perhaps to his departed soulmate. Sakura was engulfed by a surge of pity and sadness as she observed her sensei. He appeared so forlorn and sorrowful, his shoulders slumped as though bearing the world's burdens. She allowed him a moment of farewell before she spoke. He always recognized it was Sakura disrupting his solitude, and his murmurs would fade as she drew near. Sakura was thankful that he never displayed irritation or anger at her presence. She felt a sense of belonging in these moments, privileged to witness this vulnerable aspect of her sensei. Naruto and Sasuke had never seen him in such a state: weary, defeated, and laden with sorrow.

“Goodbye Rin, Obito. Rest easy Minato and Kushina. Forgive me, mother and father.” He bid farewell and rose to his feet, dusting off his knees.

"I'm sorry to intrude, Sensei," Sakura said quietly. It was partly true, but she also cherished these moments when he was melancholic. He appeared so genuine to her, his mask doing little to hide his emotions. She ought to feel guilty, yet he never objected, nor did he ever ask her to leave.

"You could never be an intrusion," Kakashi said, offering a tired smile that didn't quite reach his eyes, heavy with sorrow. Sakura mirrored his gesture, her smile warm and reassuring. "Feel free to bother your sensei any time."

Despite his somber demeanor, Sakura was convinced he was sincere, and her warm smile faded. How could she convey her desire to disband Team 7 when they were all that remained for each other? How could she possibly leave him? She bit her bottom lip, uncertain of what to do next.

Kakashi discerned her hesitation and settled her dilemma. "I'm serious, Sakura. You're welcome to seek me out anytime, however, there is something I need to tell you. Tsunade has requested I resume solo Jounin-level missions in the absence of Naruto and Sasuke."

"But we're still a team," Sakura protested, albeit feebly, on principle.

Kakashi tousled her hair. "It was a difficult decision, but there's not much more I can teach you. Your chakra control is almost perfect. Tsunade would be the ideal sensei for you at this point, Sakura."

“You’re my sensei,” Sakura stated stubbornly.

Kakashi regarded Sakura with a thoughtful gaze. "Not anymore, Sakura. It's time for you to chase your own dreams and realize your potential. I can't assist you with that more than I already have," he said. Seeing her crestfallen expression, he added, "But remember, we will always be teammates. When Naruto and Sasuke come back, we'll still be Team 7."

Her spirits sank even lower at the mention of Sasuke. "Do you believe Sasuke will ever return?"

Kakashi exhaled, his gaze drifting above her head as he pondered her question. "You're mature enough to grasp that we can't have everything we desire. My wish is for Sasuke to come back, for us to be a team once more." As tears welled up in Sakura's eyes, Kakashi gently lifted her chin to meet his gaze. "I promise you, Sakura, I will do everything I can to ensure his return to you. Do you understand?" With Sakura's affirmative nod, a smile crinkled his eye. "I want you to be happy, Sakura. In exchange, can you promise to not dwell in sadness, to smile even when it hurts?"

Sakura nodded, despite the request seeming impossible. How could one be happy constantly? "I promise," she stated solemnly.

"Good," Kakashi said, his hand dropping to his side. She could see she had eased his mind, which in turn comforted her. "Now, will my favorite student be treating me to dinner?"

"Of course, Sensei!" she responded with enthusiasm.

Kakashi offered a smile before turning away, his posture relaxed and hands sliding into his pockets as he strolled toward the heart of Konoha. A fleeting image crossed Sakura's mind, stopping her in her tracks as she began to follow him.

"I'll make it better, Sakura. That's a promise," he said as he removed his gloves, cradling her face to draw her gaze to his. The gentle touch of his fingers set her heart racing. She had never felt so alive.

“Sakura, are you coming?” Kakashi asked her curiously.

"Ah! Yes!" Sakura hurried after him, her face flushing with embarrassment. Had she really just hallucinated that moment with Kakashi-sensei? How strange!

XXHer decision to become Tsunade's apprentice was timely. His resolve began to falter as he spent more time with Sakura. Her implanted memories appeared stable. Hinata and Lee observed no changes in her personality, except for her renewed fixation on Sasuke Uchiha, which did not cause much concern. Sakura was more relaxed around him, merely rolling her eyes when he ruffled her hair. He maintained a demeanor of distance and nonchalance, similar to how he behaved with Naruto or Sasuke, even avoiding paying the bill during dinners, despite his instinctual desire to look after her. It was only at the cenotaph where he allowed her to see the extent of his concealed emotions.

Kakashi despised the necessity of lying about Rin. It seemed a betrayal of two of his closest friends, yet he couldn't let Sakura become suspicious. At the cenotaph, he sought their pardon, justifying his actions as a means to spare Sakura from sorrow. Sasuke remained out of reach, and while focusing her attention on him, it offered Kakashi reassurance that Sakura wasn't entirely lost to him. Kakashi believed Sasuke cared more for Sakura than he had shown, and perhaps their bond could be mended. He knew, however, that once Sakura learned of his deceit and manipulation, she might never forgive him. The damage to their relationship was done, and discovery was inevitable, either by Sakura's realization or Sasuke's return, which would only complicate matters. Kakashi had vowed to bring Sasuke back, a vow made with sincere intent. If Sasuke's return was what would bring Sakura joy, then Kakashi was prepared to withdraw, despite the agony it would cause him. His sole desire was her happiness, a truth he acknowledged far too late.Sakura made her request of Tsunade and he was called to a meeting with the Hokage the following day.

"Sakura has asked to be my student, and I have agreed," Tsunade said, her expression grave.

"As you command, Hokage-sama," Kakashi said, bowing his head in acknowledgment. "Shall I resume undertaking solo missions?"

"Hmm, it's amusing because Sakura seemed to think that I had already assigned you to them. I'm curious as to where she got that idea?"

"Hokage-sama, my intention was merely to alleviate her guilt. I understood what she wanted, and she is my favorite student," he said, offering a crinkled eye, to which she responded with a scowl.

"Do you take me for a fool, brat?" Tsunade demanded.

"Never, Hokage-sama," Kakashi said, swallowing hard. Did she suspect something?

"According to all accounts, Sakura was your least favourite student. You've overlooked her training in favor of the two boys. It's not surprising, given your emotional constipation, that you failed to recognize her potential, but such a rapid change in attitude is questionable," she said, scrutinizing him closely. "What are you up to, Kakashi?"

He let out a sigh of resignation. "It's true, I have overlooked Sakura's needs. It became apparent only after Naruto and Sasuke left how much I had done so. I acknowledge now that I am not the suitable mentor for her. I only want to ensure Sakura's well-being, Hokage-sama," he confessed with sincerity.

Tsunade scrutinized him with a discerning eye and exhaled sharply in irritation. "I believe you, but you're withholding something, Hatake," she declared, fixing him with a stern gaze. Kakashi remained unshaken. "Here's a mission scroll for you—an S-class, to be carried out solo."

Kakashi accepted it and bowed his head. "Oh, and Kakashi?" He quirked an eyebrow in response. "This isn't the end of it." With a single nod, he made his exit through the window.

That was close. Kakashi had navigated life mostly under the radar. The Third Hokage had a soft spot for him, granting him considerable freedom to do as he liked. However, Tsunade's arrival threatened to shake things up, beginning with her focus on Sakura. Kakashi understood the need to change for the village's betterment. The Third wasn't without his faults, and each Hokage sought to enhance the village in their own ways. Kakashi's preference, though, was for Tsunade's scrutiny to bypass him and his connection with Sakura. The last thing he wanted was for his tampering with Sakura's memories to come to light. His actions were unlawful and would result in imprisonment unless he opted to become a missing-nin like Itachi. Should Sakura uncover the truth and decide to expose him, he was prepared to bear the consequences and the village's condemnation without protest, unlike his father. Fortunately, he had avoided long-term commitments or fathering children, ensuring that his legacy of shame would die with him.

The mission was of a semi long-term nature, necessitating his departure from the village for at least a few months. It offered a chance for respite and perspective away from Sakura. He shared the news during their weekly dinner, cutting into Sakura's narrative about Shizune and Tonton and their antics. 

"Oh, for the long term? How long will you be away?" Sakura inquired, her concern evident in her voice.

“At least a couple of months,” Kakashi said heavily.

"So long?" Sakura's frown deepened. "An S-class mission?" Upon his confirmation, she bit her lip with worry. "Do you really have to complete it by yourself?"

"Yes, Sakura," he said, offering her a reassuring smile. "There's no need for concern. I've successfully carried out missions like this dozens of times. I'll be alright." It wasn't entirely true, but he saw no need to cause her unnecessary worry. His resolve to return to her was firm.

"I understand," Sakura stated with confidence. "It's just that... I'll miss our dinners together." I’ll miss you.

"Even though I never pay?" Kakashi asked, feigning astonishment. I wish I had the strength to stay and not interfere with your life.

“Even then,” Sakura assured him. I’ll pay for them all if you’re safe, sensei.

"I'll return before you realize it, and when I do, dinner's on me, just this once," Kakashi declared, aiming to brighten the atmosphere. Smile Sakura.

"I'll hold you to that," Sakura stated in a subdued tone. He will come home; he has to.

"Perhaps Naruto will return by then," Kakashi said with hope, comforted to see Sakura's expression lighten significantly. He'll ensure your happiness. His love for you, no matter how platonic, rivals my own.

“Do you really think so, sensei?” she asked hopefully. 

Kakashi nodded. "Despite his Academy records, he's stubborn enough to accomplish anything. I'm sure he's training as diligently with Jiraiya as you are with Tsunade. Team 7 will reunite sooner than you think." Except for Sasuke.

"Okay," she decided not to dwell on thoughts of Sasuke at the moment. "And you're buying Naruto some ramen too."

Kakashi grimaced, recalling the emptiness of his wallet from the last time he had offered to treat Naruto to dinner. He scratched the back of his head in chagrin, quickly back-pedaling. "Maa, Sakura, let's not be too hasty."

Sakura pouted, “Please, sensei?”

With that look from Sakura, Kakashi realized he had lost. "Alright, but you're coming with us. I'll cover the cost for both of you at once," he conceded.

Sakura's pout morphed into a grimace. "I suppose that's reasonable."

After dinner, Kakashi gazed at the sky and gave a nod. It was still early enough. "Sakura, can I ask a favor from you while I'm gone?"

“Of course!”

"I have a plant named Mr. Ukki. He requires infrequent watering but neglecting him for two months is too long and he would die."

"You want me to take care of your plant?" Sakura exclaimed in surprise. Why her? She wondered why he hadn't asked Gai-sensei or Asuma-sensei instead. Could it be that he trusted her to such an extent?

“Yes,” Kakashi said. “I’ll ensure your chakra can unlock my doors. We’ll have to do it now, if you have time?”

“You want me to go into your house?” Sakura asked in a high-pitched voice.

“Yes,” Kakashi affirmed. “Is that a problem?”

"No!" Sakura exclaimed hastily. "It's just that I've never been inside your apartment before!" Nor had Naruto or Sasuke!

“Oh,” Kakashi murmured. “It’s just a typical apartment.”

Sakura found herself in an unfamiliar neighborhood, on the opposite side of Konoha from her parents' home. The apartment building appeared somewhat dilapidated, yet it was evident that many shinobi resided there, given the numerous unfamiliar chakra signatures surrounding her. Kakashi's residence was on the top floor, distinguishable by his dingy gray door with flaking paint. He instructed her to release some of her chakra onto the door to register her signature with his security system. After she attempted to open the door, Kakashi nodded in approval as it unlocked without issue.

He opened the door and welcomed her in. Kakashi observed as she surveyed his apartment with curiosity. Glancing around, he grimaced at the sight. The apartment hadn't seen a change in years; he saw no reason for it. The handful of friends he let in were typically there to make sure he joined them for the evening, staying just long enough to coax him out. He had never brought a woman here. His apartment was his haven, and any brief romances took place at their residences. Only Genma and Gai had really spent time there. Genma, residing in the same building, occasionally used Kakashi's place as a retreat when one of his romantic escapades lingered too long. However, those visits had dwindled, and Kakashi struggled to recall the last morning he found Genma asleep on his sofa. Gai, ever the rival, frequently dropped by to issue a new challenge or to cook Kakashi nutritious meals, aiming to preserve his 'youthful' vitality. The state of his home never mattered to Genma or Gai. Yet, in that moment, Kakashi acknowledged it might be time for an update.

The couch, old and sagging, was nonetheless very comfortable. The television, equally aged, had an uncertain operational status. The coffee table, a relic rescued when Genma upgraded to a new one, bore scars and stains yet remained sturdy and reliable. The apartment featured an open concept design, with the kitchen demarcated only by an island serving as a half-wall, beneath which a line of rickety barstools stood. The kitchen itself was unremarkable, with bare walls and countertops, and a fridge devoid of any decorations.

"It looks very... nice," Sakura remarked, her voice lacking conviction.

"I'm seldom at home," Kakashi explained, a touch of embarrassment in his voice. "Mr. Ukki is this way."

He guided Sakura to the rear of his apartment, into a narrow corridor. Three doors stood ajar, disclosing his bathroom, a room he used for storage, and his bedroom. The latter housed most of his possessions, offering a spacious and luminous contrast to the apartment's other areas. A bed was nestled against one wall, while an aged desk sat opposite. Various papers lay scattered across it, which Kakashi quickly assembled into a tidy pile.

“Mission reports.” He told her. “Overdue ones.”

Sakura giggled, her gaze wandering curiously around his room. She was surprised to see his bed made; despite being an elite Jounin, she had always pictured him as somewhat untidy. Yet, his neatness made sense—it reflected the self-discipline required to reach his status. Her smile brightened upon noticing the photo on his bedside table. It was Team 7's first photo, featuring Naruto's scowl, Sasuke's grimace, and their combined smiles. The happiness she felt then was palpable, yet now, the reason seemed distant. Was it simply because she was on Sasuke's team? Another photo drew her attention, and she moved closer to Kakashi's desk, eyes wide. It depicted his own team in their youth, with Minato Namikaze, the Fourth Hokage, as their sensei. There was a boy she didn't recognize, but whom Naruto had described as Obito Uchiha, a long-lost relative of Sasuke's. And there was Rin Nohara, the girl Kakashi had cherished, and his soulmate. A twinge of possessiveness surged through Sakura as she observed Rin, but she quickly dismissed it, continuing to study the image.

She was pretty, yet Kurenai-sensei could be called more beautiful. The purple marks on her cheeks likely signified a clan marking, akin to Kiba's. Rin's brown hair was cut shorter than hers, her dark eyes a lighter hue compared to Kakashi's. Sakura pondered whether Kakashi had a preference for short hair. The girl's joy stood out starkly against Kakashi and Obito's demeanor. It mirrored the dynamic of Team 7, prompting Sakura to consider further parallels between their teams. Was Kakashi's personality closer to Naruto's or Sasuke's? Loud and brash like Naruto didn't seem fitting, and his expression often mirrored Sasuke's. Sakura could envision Rin harboring feelings for Kakashi, much like her own for Sasuke. He exuded a cool, enigmatic presence and he only preserved that aura of mystery with his mask. Sakura frequently noticed women gesturing towards him, their laughter shared in hushed tones. 'Kakashi Hatake, the heartbreaker,' they murmured. The moniker irked her slightly. Had he stayed true to his soulmate? They were barely older than children at her passing. The thought of Kakashi's intimacy—or lack thereof—sent a blush to Sakura's cheeks, yet the question burned within her.

“Hey, sensei?”

"Yes, Sakura?" Kakashi inquired casually while organizing his mission reports. It was as good a time as any to submit them. Tsunade would be displeased if he didn't complete them before his departure.

“Are you dating anyone?”

He glanced sharply at Sakura, noticing her cheeks flushed and her expression one of self-consciousness. "No," he replied curtly, anticipating the end of the conversation.

“But why?” Sakura persisted despite her embarrassment. “I’m sure Rin would want you to be happy.”

Kakashi sighed, rubbing his face. It was as if Sakura couldn’t help herself. He was worried that he hadn’t suppressed enough of her memories. Had she convinced herself she had a crush on him? Was he doomed to repeat the same mistakes? “I never said I haven’t had relationships Sakura. I don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy, or to feel complete. You need to understand that,” Kakashi said pointedly.

Sakura frowned at the suggestion. "I am happy without Sasuke! Who claimed I wasn't? I don't sulk around like you, visiting the cenotaph daily and caressing her name like a lovelorn puppy!" Suddenly, Sakura covered her mouth with her hands, her eyes expanding in shock.

Kakashi was taken aback, the sting of her words cutting deep. A bitter chuckle broke through as he acknowledged that Sakura was right; he was indeed wallowing, more than usual, but it stemmed from Sakura, not Rin. He had once assured Hinata that sadness was impossible for him as long as Sakura was happy. He had to recall that her joy outweighed his own, that it meant world to him. When Sakura made to dash away, Kakashi swiftly extended his hand, catching hers. The familiar surge passed through him, but he dismissed it, drawing her closer.

“Sakura.” His voice pleaded. “Look at me.”

Her gaze met his, revealing the misery and guilt in her eyes. "I'm sorry, Kakashi. What I said was out of line. Please, feel free to remove my signature from the locks."

"Sakura," he stated firmly, "I'm not angry with you. You haven't done anything wrong," he conceded. He led her to his desk to sit down, then walked over to the window, turning his back to her as he continued speaking.

"My parents were soulmates, and I've never witnessed a deeper love. My mother's lullabies would soothe me into sleep, yet my memories of her have mostly faded. All I recall is that when she was alive, my father used to smile."

“You don’t have to-” Sakura protested.

"It's okay, Sakura," Kakashi said, pausing to collect his thoughts. He had never shared the story of his parents with anyone, and it was challenging to articulate years of buried emotions. "When she passed away, it was as if a part of my father did too. He only smiled for me afterward, but it was evident her death shattered him. My father's love for Konoha was deep, and he held his teammates as dear as family. On one critical mission for Konoha, he faced a harrowing decision: complete the mission or save his teammates. His choice to save them led to the mission's failure, and Konoha paid the price. His teammates even resented him for it." Sakura yearned to interject, but she remained silent, allowing Kakashi to continue. "My father took his own life when I was six. Regardless of his reasons, I believe he found solace in reuniting with my mother." A trace of bitterness laced his words as he recounted his father's death. Although Kakashi had reconciled with his father's decision during the mission, he couldn't forgive him for leaving him behind. He waited for Sakura's response, but only her faint breathing filled the silence, so he went on. "I despised my soulmark when it first appeared; it was a constant reminder of my father, a symbol of his weakness. I convinced myself that emotional bonds were frailties, that the mission was everything. Yet, Obito and Rin taught me that forsaking a comrade was a far graver sin. The mission was secondary to the safety of those you cherish." Reflecting on the first time he laid eyes on Sakura, so innocent and optimistic, he realized she was everything he never knew he needed. "The moment I saw her," he confessed, looking at Sakura, "time stood still, and I understood she was the one. Her youth, her joy, her radiant smile—it all captivated me."

Sakura clenched her fists, her body shaking. A tumult of emotions—awe, sorrow, and happiness—battled for dominance as she listened to Kakashi's tale. His description of his soulmate was profoundly romantic, yet the knowledge of their story's end was deeply tragic.

"And I was aware that she was too bright for me, and I could never be worthy of her," he said, his voice gaining stability as he coughed. "Rin stepped in front of me as I was about to strike an enemy shinobi. She did it because they had implanted something within her designed to destroy Konoha. She knew I wouldn't be able to do it. I couldn't stop myself in time, and she died in my arms." Despite repeatedly pondering how he might have saved her, acknowledging that her death was her own choice, he remained unable to shake off his guilt. He had made a promise to Obito, and he had broken that promise.

He fell silent, hoping that whatever bond they'd formed didn't betray him when she spoke of meeting Sakura. His grief over Rin's death was genuine, casting a shadow over his life, with the murmurs of 'Friend-killer Kakashi' haunting him for months. Having lost both teammates, one to his own hands and the other's eye as a memento, he believed he warranted the village's disdain.

Sakura was at a loss for words. She hadn't anticipated this response when she inquired about Kakashi's relationships. Yet, had she not desired this very answer? Had she not envisioned this scenario? Was it wrong for her to feel relieved that he had confided in her so deeply? He was her friend, and although she was uncertain of his feelings, she was determined to offer him comfort. Rising from his desk, she approached him. His hands were pressed against the window, his head bowed. Sakura embraced him from behind, resting her cheek against his back. He tensed for a moment before yielding to her embrace.

"I'm sorry, Kakashi." She knew recounting the past wouldn't alter it, but she hoped that by sharing his story, he might release some of his burdens.

Kakashi told himself to push her away. Yet, her arms wrapped so tightly around him silenced all his negative feelings. The sensation of her pressed against him was the solace he had longed for, and he allowed himself a brief respite. He knew he would leave shortly, and it would be months before he saw her again. Soon, he promised himself. He would pull away from her soon.

XX

Kakashi embarked on his mission early the next morning, leaving a slumbering Sakura in his bed. He had spent the night on the sofa, experiencing the most restful sleep he'd ever had. Once Sakura released him, her words tumbled out in a charmingly flustered manner. He introduced her to Mr. Ukki, perched on his windowsill, and instructed her on his care. In the kitchen, he seated her on a barstool and prepared a simple yet late snack. Sakura declared it the best meal she had ever tasted. The thought of caring for his soulmate filled him with a warm possessiveness. Following their meal, the lateness of the hour was apparent. Overcome by drowsiness, Sakura dozed off on his couch. After tidying up, Kakashi contacted her mother, assuring her that Sakura had completed a taxing mission and was sound asleep. Having met Sakura's mother just once, he was comforted by her approval of Sakura staying overnight. Her trust in him quelled any improper thoughts he might have harbored.

He wrote a note for Sakura and left the village before the sun came up. It would be six months before he saw her again.

Chapter Text

Sakura woke up the next morning and found Kakashi gone. He’d left a note that made her smile. She folded it carefully and put it in her pocket. She’d place it in her desk once she got home.

I’ll be home soon. Please take care of Mr. Ukki. Don’t go into my apartment if Genma is there. Good luck with your training.
-Kakashi

Her training with Tsunade demanded all her time and focus. She made time for her friends whenever possible. At times, she caught Ino or Tenten giving her strange looks when she brooded over Sasuke, but she ignored them. Perhaps it was foolish to harbor feelings for him after so long, especially since he wasn't her soulmate. They had never really talked about their soulmarks since the night she painted Hinata's toenails. That memory felt hazy and somewhat surreal. She recognized her unhappiness was linked to her soulmate. She must have been more exhausted that night than she realized. She contemplated what the marks might signify or any hints they might reveal. She was convinced Hinata's mark would align with Naruto's. The marks belonging to Ino, Tenten, and Lee remained enigmatic. She pondered if any matched Sasuke's mark and what it would signify for her if they did.

She occasionally pondered how Sasuke would be upon returning to the village. Would Team 7 resume their missions together? Would he persist in disregarding her, or would her presence merely irritate him? Could he possibly reciprocate the feelings she had confessed to Ino so long ago? Sakura was cautious not to scrutinize her emotions too deeply. Her fixation with Sasuke illuminated her recollections, with sentiments of devotion infusing every memory of him. Yet, at times, the racing of her heart and the catching of her breath at the thought of him seemed insincere. At times, recalling Sasuke's gaze and treatment of her made her dedication feel hollow. Lying in her childhood bedroom at night, surrounded by the images she had affixed to the walls from the academy days, she often wondered at what point she had lost her way.

She had always been aware of her parents' past as genin, undertaking the same D-rank missions she now found herself assigned to. She understood that, although they were no longer active shinobi, they maintained the discipline and dedication expected of them, for the betterment of the village and its people. This legacy had molded her earliest ambitions, inspired by her father's tales of training and the sight of her parents' faded Hitai-ates. Her aim evolved to not only walk in her parents' footsteps but also to exceed their achievements. Her objective extended beyond becoming a genin; she aspired to reach the rank of Jounin, serving her village with the same loyalty as the Hokage, whose faces were etched in stone. However, Sasuke's presence in her life had shifted her focus. He became her new objective, a desire to prove her worth to someone oblivious to her existence.

At fifteen, she often felt twice her age, contrasting herself with the naive girl who had first entered the academy. She was aware that to her parents, she remained the bright child who once donned their Hitai-ates and played with rubber kunai. However, as her training grew more rigorous, she recognized that her parents had lost touch with her aspirations, having abandoned their own to forge new dreams. Their concern was evident; her mother's gaze held a persistent, fearful watchfulness. Barred from her mission files, they were left in the dark about her undertakings with Team 7, particularly the harrowing missions that left her battered and worn down. This veil of secrecy had strained their relationship; her parents struggled with the notion that there were aspects of her life they were not privy to, which left them feeling frustrated.

The breaking point occurred when Sakura's mother discovered her practicing medical ninjutsu on herself. Although her control was not yet flawless, preventing her from fully healing a significant wound, she was noticeably improving. Tsunade had cautioned her against overexertion and the risk of chakra depletion, yet Sakura had often pushed beyond her limits before truly understanding them. That day, she had been methodically cutting her palms with a kunai and mending the injuries with intense focus. She was excited about the advancements in her skills, evidenced by new scars and several partially healed lacerations on her arms, not realizing she had overused her chakra. The kunai lay next to her open hand, and Sakura was drifting in the limbo between consciousness and slumber when her mother entered her room and gasped at the scene.

"It's okay," Sakura assured her, her words slurring. "Jus' chakra exhaus—" she yawned, too weary to lift her hand to cover her mouth.

"Kizashi! KIZASHI!!!" Sakura's mother called out for her husband, panic in her voice as she slapped the kunai away from Sakura's grasp. "What have you done, Sakura? What have you done?"

"What's the matter, Mebuki?" her father exclaimed as he rushed into the room, halting abruptly at the sight of his wife cradling Sakura close to her chest.

"She injured herself, Kizashi," she said, gently stroking Sakura's hair. "I don't understand. Is it because of that Sasuke she's been mentioning again?"

Energy gradually returned to Sakura as her chakra levels became stable. Fortunately, it wasn't a case of true chakra exhaustion, or she would have had to confront Tsunade's wrath in the hospital for her careless actions. She pulled away from her mother, frowning at the cuts that were not fully healed. "Mom, I'm okay. I was just pushing the limits of my medical ninjutsu a bit too far," she said. Sakura rose to her feet, unsteadily, and approached her dresser in search of something to clean the blood from her arm, oblivious to the stricken expression on her mother's face and her father's heavy scowl.

As Sakura turned around, she observed her parents' expressions with bewilderment. "What's the matter?" she inquired, puzzled.

"What on earth is Tsunade teaching you?" her father bellowed, his face flushing with fury.

“Dad!” Sakura stared at him with horror. “Shishou is the Hokage! You can’t talk about her like that.”

"I don't care if she's the mother of humanity!" her father fumed. "She's causing you to harm yourself, Sakura. What kind of training is that?"

Sakura's gaze shifted from her silently weeping mother to her father's clenched fists, and finally to the kunai in her hand, stained with her own blood. A lump formed in her throat as she grasped the gravity of the misunderstanding. She scratched at the healing cuts on her arm and exhaled a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry," she began. "I didn't understand how it appeared."

I’m sorry? her mother mouthed, still dismayed by what she’d unknowingly walked into.

"Shishou is teaching me to utilize my exceptional chakra control for medical ninjutsu," Sakura declared with pride. "When Naruto and Sasuke return, I'll be able to heal them if they're seriously injured. Perhaps Shishou will even allow me to accompany Kakashi-sensei on dangerous missions once he's back!" Her excitement faded as she noticed her parents' spirits drop, her mother's clenched fist pressed painfully against her mouth to suppress her sobs.

"Mom? Dad? What's the matter? Didn't you hear? My ninjutsu skills are improving, and Hinata and Lee continue to practice taijutsu with me. I'm confident I could pass the chunin exams with ease now," Sakura boasted, attempting to lift her parents' spirits. "I'll be prepared for S-class missions before long."

“S-class missions?” her mother repeated with a fearful look at her husband.

Sakura gazed at her mother, concern mounting within her, and turned to her father, seeking some clarification.

"Sakura," her father sighed, reaching out to clasp his wife's hand. "We are immensely proud of you. It's beyond our wildest dreams that you would become the Hokage's student." As he tightened his grip on his wife's hand, she nodded in concurrence with his words. "But you are our daughter." Seeing Sakura's puzzled look, he attempted to clarify. "You'll comprehend when you have children of your own. Our love for you surpasses everything, and it terrifies us to witness you hurt. Regardless of our pride, we can't bear to see you in pain."

"I understand," Sakura murmured. Suddenly, her parents' worries were clear to her. She recalled numerous instances when her tales of Team 7's adventures had filled her parents with dread. She hadn't even shared the close calls she, Naruto, or Sasuke had faced. Unintentionally, she had been causing her parents distress. They knew just enough about the shinobi world to fear that Sakura might one day not return. "I'm sorry, mom and dad. It never crossed my mind," she admitted. After healing her last wounds, she embraced her mother. "I'm always cautious," she assured them. "Kakashi-sensei and Naruto are looking out for me. They're my guardians, and I aim to be theirs as well. I can't guarantee I'll never be hurt," she said gravely, "but I will always remain vigilant."

Her mother held Sakura close, yearning for the days when she was young enough to be shielded by a parent's protection. She regretted allowing her husband to nurture Sakura's aspirations of becoming a shinobi, regardless of its nobility.

"That's all we can ask for," her father said. "And please, practice your medical ninjutsu on someone else."

Sakura consented and began spending more time at Kakashi's apartment. She felt somewhat guilty for encroaching on his space, yet she harbored the hope that he might one day come back while she was tending to Mr. Ukki and notice how diligently she had maintained his home. She had meticulously cleaned every corner, being cautious not to disrupt any personal items and resisting the urge to snoop. Under her care, Mr. Ukki had outgrown his pot, prompting her to prune some branches and propagate them into new pots, creating a small family for Mr. Ukki. Her recent ordeal with her parents had affected her deeply, leading her to abandon self-harm as a means to practice healing. Instead, she invited members from other teams to seek her out for treatment when injured. This practice quickly became overwhelming, and her parents grew concerned about injured shinobi visiting their home at all hours for Sakura's training. Nevertheless, she refused to allow them to encroach on Kakashi's private space, and lingering at the training grounds all day waiting for patients was not an option.

Several weeks following an incident with her parents, Sakura relocated to her own apartment. With assistance from her parents and the modest income from D-class missions and aiding Tsunade, she managed to secure a small one-room apartment near Kakashi's place. Initially, her parents objected to the idea, but they eventually gave in after much discussion. She was convinced it was the right move, even though it pained her to witness her mother's tears as she collected her final belongings. Her new residence was much like Kakashi's, minimally decorated with aged, worn-out furniture. Having saved money since her academy days, she purchased what was necessary without depleting her funds. Eagerly, she awaited Naruto and Kakashi's return to present them with her new home.

The initial two months after Kakashi's departure flew by, leaving Sakura with little time to dwell on his absence. As the third month reached its midpoint, she found herself visiting his apartment more frequently, hoping to catch him upon his return. By the fourth month, her mind was often preoccupied with thoughts of his prolonged mission. With the fifth month's end, Sakura sought updates from Tsunade on his status with increasing urgency, be it weekly or daily. Tsunade emphasized the critical nature of his mission, which necessitated infrequent contact to maintain his cover. The last update, reassuring Tsunade of Kakashi's safety, mentioned delays in gathering necessary information, indicating that he would not make contact until his mission report was ready to be delivered. This update, given towards the fourth month's close, left Sakura in a state of distress, desperate for knowledge of his circumstances.

"Sakura, you're driving me insane!" Tsunade groaned, hurling her sake bottle against the wall in a fit of anger. "Kakashi will return home only when his mission is finished, not a moment before!"

“But Shishou-”

"No!" Tsunade snarled. "Enough about the brat ! Should anything go awry, Pakkun would be the first to notify me of the annulment of his blood contract with Kakashi due to his death."

“His death?” Sakura whimpered.

Tsunade's expression softened. "Sakura, he won't die. He's too fortunate for that. I've never witnessed anyone so intent on dying yet managing to survive the most dire circumstances in spite of it."

Sakura bit her lip, feeling unsettled by the veiled remark. "Like what happened with Rin?"

Struggling to see past her escalating hangover, Tsunade gazed at Sakura, her expression one of bewilderment. "Rin Nohara? I haven't come across that name in a long time. How do you know it?" The truth was, Tsunade had never met Rin Nohara personally. However, the Third Hokage had held Kakashi in high regard, just as he did Naruto, and had maintained a file on him for his successor. Tsunade had perused it out of curiosity about Kakashi, Sakura's former sensei, and the man who had let her down so profoundly. She had learned of his sorrowful history and felt a pang of sympathy, although she knew that many shinobi of his era had endured similar hardships. Rin Nohara was Kakashi's teammate whom he had tragically been compelled to kill to avert another tailed beast attack. Records indicated that Rin's mental state had deteriorated following the death of her soulmate, Obito, Kakashi's other teammate, whose eye Rin had implanted in place of Kakashi's lost one.

“Kakashi told me about his soulmate.” Sakura said guiltily. “I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone.”

"His soulmate?" Tsunade concentrated, attempting to recall the specific details of his report. Kakashi had undergone annual physicals until his retirement from Anbu and, as far as she could remember, he had never manifested a soulmark. He was among the many of his generation who hadn't. The memory of her own soulmate, Dan, brought pain, and she, like many others, presumed that those without soulmarks had lost them before reaching puberty. The loss of so many young shinobi in the name of peace weighed heavily on her, including her beloved brother Nawaki. He was never had the chance to reach puberty but was deemed old enough to fight and die for Konoha. "Kakashi Hatake has never manifested a soulmark," Tsunade declared, observing Sakura intently. "Rin Nohara was the soulmate of his teammate Obito Uchiha."

Sakura's frown deepened. "That can't be true," she asserted. "He said she was his soulmate." The memory of his expression when he spoke flashed in her mind, and with it, a sharp pain throbbed in her head.

“She loved me.”

“And did you love her?”

“I could have. I wish I had.”

“Or did he?” Sakura wondered aloud with confusion, clutching her aching head.

Tsunade observed Sakura with increasing worry as her complexion turned pale and her eyes took on a distant look, her fingers pressing against her temples. "Sakura, what's wrong?" she asked.

Sakura shook her head. "I'm not sure. I just don't feel good."

Tsunade rose and approached Sakura, carefully moving her hands away before placing her own on Sakura's head to check for injuries. Directing healing chakra towards Sakura's temples, she noted Sakura's sigh of relief. Upon further examination, Tsunade found no injuries, yet Sakura's abrupt confusion and pain aroused her suspicion.

“What were you saying about Kakashi?” Tsunade commanded gently.

Sakura shook her head, her mind still foggy and confused. "When will Kakashi return home? I miss him," she murmured, a yawn overtaking her, signaling her readiness for a nap.

Tsunade gazed intently at Sakura, noting the omission of the honorific and the desperation in Sakura's voice. "He will be home soon, Sakura. How does that make you feel?" she asked cautiously, feeling a twinge of guilt for exploiting Sakura's vulnerable state.

"Happy," Sakura whispered, her voice laced with contentment. "He makes me happy."

“Why, Kakashi?” Why didn’t he want his own soulmate who was right in front of his eyes?

Sakura frowned. "No, he doesn't want me," she murmured, beginning to tremble as conflicting memories surged within her. He had rejected her. But why did it matter? Why should his rejection affect her? She wasn't his soulmate, after all.

“I’ll make it better, Sakura. That's a promise.” He slipped his gloves off, cradling her face, and forcing her eyes to his.

The realization dawned on Sakura, the spinning tomoe patterns vivid in her consciousness as Tsunade's chakra eased the ache in her skull and clarified her thoughts. He was her soulmate, yet he had forced her to forget. He had betrayed her trust. She shook her head in an attempt to dispel her muddled thoughts, hugging herself tightly and clutching her stomach. How long had he expected the genjutsu to take affect? Especially without his presence to sustain it? How long had he planned to hide it from her? One year? Five years? The rest of his life?

"Sakura," Tsunade said, her voice edged with danger, a vein pulsing in her forehead. "Explain."

Sakura gave a weak laugh, her mind scrambling for an explanation. Speaking her thoughts out loud had been foolish. She was furious with Kakashi, yet the thought of him behind bars was unbearable. The act she believed he committed was undoubtedly illegal, and Tsunade would be furious on her behalf. "You caught me," Sakura said, attempting to sound conciliatory. "I've had a crush on Kakashi for a long time. He rejected me shortly before he left." She winced, recalling the sting of his rejection. That much was true; he had turned her down.

“Is that so?” Tsunade said disbelieving.

"He helped me realize that I should be interested in someone my own age."

“Like Sasuke?” Tsunade’s eyebrow climbed up.

"Like Sasuke," Sakura concurred with a hint of embarrassment. "It was just a silly crush," she stated more decisively. "We were on good terms when he left. Clearly, he wasn't truthful about Rin; he was attempting to spare my feelings."

“And why have neither of you mentioned this before?” Tsunade demanded.

"Because it was resolved, and it was embarrassing!" Sakura protested. "I didn't want the team to split over something so insignificant." As she tried to explain, her expression saddened. Despite her efforts to protect Kakashi, she couldn't hide her distress. "Maybe I'm not over it," Sakura conceded. "But he is still my friend, and I'm entitled to worry about him!"

"Relax, Sakura," Tsunade sighed. What should be done? It was evident that Sakura was concealing something to protect Kakashi, but the question remained: what was it? Tsunade had no doubts about his character, despite his fascination with Jiraiya's perverted book series. He had shown himself to be a faithful shinobi to Konoha, and both Naruto and Sakura held him in high esteem. "The brat isn't in trouble."

Sakura exhaled and her tension eased. "Thank you, Shishou. Kakashi-sensei is a good man."

Tsunade nodded and dismissed Sakura, who scampered out of the office as if her ass was on fire. Immediately after she left, Tsunade sifted through the files on her desk until Kakashi's surfaced. She perused his medical records once more, noting with interest that his most recent annual physical had been conducted when he was 21. At that time, Sakura would have been only 7 or 8 years old, far from reaching puberty. It begged the question: why would he deceive Sakura about the existence of a soulmate? Truly intriguing.

XX

Kakashi made his way home in the dead of night, his body aching with numerous cuts and bruises. Yet, it was sheer exhaustion that weighed down his steps. He had been running for most of the day, driven by the thought of a hot shower and his bed. The following day, he planned to visit Tsunade to deliver an oral report on his mission. With some luck, he might encounter Sakura at the Hokage tower, assisting Tsunade or Shizune. The six months apart from her had been more challenging than he anticipated, filled with constant dreams of her. During his absence, Sakura had celebrated her 15th birthday, and he silently appreciated the passage of time.16 years old was the age of consent for a shinobi, and sadly it was because of the type of missions that you would be expected to undertake. Hinata would be exempt, being the heiress of the Hyuga clan, but Tenten, Sakura and even Ino would be expected to participate in seduction missions soon. Nothing they weren’t willing to do, but things that Kurenai had once admitted felt degrading. Even Kakashi had completed his fair share of seduction missions, and he hated every single one of them.

He had no intention of taking advantage of Sakura, and irrespective of Konoha's laws, he resolved not to confront her about their soulmarks until she reached 18. On her 18th birthday, he would be 31, turning 32 before her 19th. The thought incited self-reproach, yet he acknowledged the limits of his restraint. He was aware of individuals who had spurned their soulmark, even when confronted with their soulmates. Whether due to existing commitments or an unsuitable soulmate, such rejections were not unprecedented. However, Kakashi could not fathom dismissing an adult Sakura and severing the bond that tugged at him. She belonged to him, and he to her, in a profound, indescribable manner. Should she choose someone else, Sasuke or an unnamed suitor, his hands would be tied. It disturbed him to realize that before he could walk away, he would lay himself at her feet and beg for him to accept him. He was truly pathetic.

As he stepped into his apartment, her presence was instantly palpable, sending his heart racing. She wasn't sleeping on his couch. Edging toward the bedroom, he listened intently for any sign of movement. Her heartbeat, slow and steady, was discernible to him. Deep, even breaths and the gentle rustling of his bedsheets accompanied her subtle shifts. She was asleep. Sakura was asleep in his bed. His pants tightened immediately at the thought and He turned away before entering his bedroom, unable to face a sleeping Sakura in his bed. Instead, he retreated to the bathroom, turned on the tap, and splashed his face with cold water. Staring at his reflection, he noted absently that his mask was sliced and his right cheek was bleeding sluggishly. Kakashi couldn't bear to face Sakura in such a state; hard and aching, wounded and disheveled. He stripped carefully, hissing as fabric peeled away from dried blood and reopened a few wounds.

He turned on the water, considering a cold shower, but his aching body and the deep-set chill from hours of relentless running dissuaded him. He groaned in relief as the warm water cascaded over him, the heat seeping into his weary bones. Vigorously, he scrubbed his skin raw, worked soap through his hair, and rinsed away the day's grime with a contented sigh, allowing the dirt and worries to spiral down the drain. For the moment, his sole focus was cleansing himself, but he was still aroused. He sighed in defeat, gripping himself and stroking. He deliberately tried to imagine a faceless woman lying in his bed, her hair forming a halo around her head, mouth parted with shaky breaths. He squeezed, moaning lowly as he imagined her wearing nothing, arms stretched above her head as he pressed kisses to her soft stomach, to her firm thighs. He shuddered as he came to the thought of how she would sound when he finally touched her.

He hastily concluded his shower, washing away all traces of guilt along with the blood and grime that had clung to his skin. The fresh wounds had reopened, giving a slight sting as he patted himself dry. He gazed at the clothes strewn on the floor with a sense of dismay. The thought of wearing them again, stiff and crusted with dried blood, sweat, and dirt, was unbearable. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he cautiously opened the door. Listening intently, he felt a wave of relief upon hearing Sakura's gentle snores. Moving stealthily, he entered his room, quietly opened his drawers, snatched the first set of clean clothes he found, and retreated to the bathroom. He dressed swiftly, donning his mask just as Sakura's knock sounded on the bathroom door.

Kakashi gathered his soiled garments and opened the door, only to find a drowsy Sakura with her hair in disarray, donning pajamas adorned with hearts. On her feet were fluffy blue slippers with ears, leaving him puzzled whether they were meant to resemble a rabbit or a dog. It served as a vivid reminder of just how young she was. Noticing she was still half-asleep as she mumbled a greeting and brushed past him into the bathroom, he stepped aside and waited for her to shut the door. He then retreated to his room to deposit his clothes in the laundry basket, contemplating discarding them later but finding it as good as place as any to keep them for now. As he heard the faucet turn on and off, Sakura returned to his room. She briefly leaned into his caress as he gently ran his fingers through her hair, yet she continued her march back to bed without hesitation. She expressed her displeasure at the light and dove back under his covers, giving it no second thought.

“It’s time to get up,” Kakashi told Sakura with amusement.

"In the middle of the night, Kakashi, it's your turn to keep watch," she murmured drowsily.

Kakashi waited for the moment of realization to hit her, and he laughed when she abruptly leapt out of bed. His laughter was interrupted when she threw herself into his arms, embracing him tightly. "You're back!"

“Careful Sakura,” he chided as his various cuts and bruises protested her enthusiasm.

"And you're hurt!" she scolded, tugging at his shirt to assess the damage.

“Maa Sakura, it’s okay. It’s only minor cuts and bruises. They’ll heal in a few days.”

Sakura flashed a grin. "Why wait a few days?" She nudged him toward the bed, prompting him to sit while she examined his arms. He had chosen a sleeveless undershirt, his signature mask affixed to it, as with all his undershirts.

His eyes widened as her hands glowed with green chakra. Had Tsunade really taught her medical ninjutsu in just six months? He watched, impressed, as Sakura tended to the bruises and cuts on his arms, sighing in relief as her chakra resonated within him. The sensation of her chakra was calming, and he was still weary and relaxed from his shower and the activities that followed. He barely noticed when she began to tug at his shirt again, attempting to pull it free from where he had securely tucked it into his pants—a habit he had adopted since his mark had emerged at the age of 21. He tensed, seizing Sakura's hands to stop her. "I'm fine, Sakura," he stated firmly.

Seeing her wounded expression, he raised her hands to his lips and gently kissed her palm through his mask. "Thank you," he whispered against her palm, as Sakura's face turned a deep shade of red, her breathing quick and uneven. Rising to his full height, he loomed over Sakura before drawing her into another embrace. She hesitantly wrapped her arms around him, pressing her face into the warmth of his chest.

“I missed you Kakashi,” Sakura confessed softly.

He gave her a reassuring squeeze, hesitantly drawing back so as not to act more foolishly than he already had. "What brings you here at this hour?" he inquired, his eyes crinkling into a smile to show her he wasn't bothered by it.

Sakura's gaze shifted away, her hands forming tight fists. "I'm here to water Mr. Ukki and his family," she stated.

Kakashi cocked his head, puzzled. That didn't quite explain why she was sleeping in his bed. His gaze shifted to the windowsill where Mr. Ukki, along with three additional plants, had taken up residence. "His family?" he wondered aloud.

Sakura bounded to the windowsill and gestured towards them. "I haven't given them names. I left that for you."

“How did they get there?” Kakashi wondered, scratching his head.

"Mr. Ukki had outgrown his pot," Sakura said with pride, "so I pruned him and replanted his cuttings."

“Ahh, thank you Sakura.”

"You're welcome!" Sakura said, shifting under Kakashi's studied gaze.

He pictured arriving home to Sakura in such a state: sleepy and disheveled, yet greeting him with warm affection and evident joy. It was comforting to be missed, and the thought of having someone eagerly awaiting his return was appealing. "Perhaps it's time for you to head home, Sakura. It's very late."

Sakura nodded. "You're right. It's late; I should head home," she echoed. Opening his window, she swung a leg out before Kakashi seized her hand.

"You can't go home wearing just that," he chided.

"But I live in the building next door," Sakura informed him.

“What?” Kakashi let go of her hand and stared at the apartment next door with accusation. “When did that happen?”

"A few months back," Sakura said with a shrug. "I adore my parents, but my training was becoming a burden for them. So, moving out was the most sensible choice."

"I see," Kakashi said, frowning. He didn't—not really. Having been orphaned and living alone for so long, he was unaccustomed to being accountable to anyone.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" Sakura inquired.

Kakashi nodded. If it were up to him, she would see him every day. "Please stop by whenever you can," he requested.

Sakura echoed his solemn tone. "We need to have a conversation, then?"

"Yes," Kakashi concurred. It was time to address their marks. Their behaviour that evening had seemed effortless, despite it having the potential of being awkward and forced. His skin buzzed with her chakra, with the gentleness of her healing touch. He comprehended his own actions. Their separation necessitated a need for him to remain close to her, after so much time apart. He craved the confirmation of her presence, tangible beneath his fingers. A longing he had neglected until her immediate presence reignited it. Sakura's returned affection remained a mystery. Did she recall his actions? Or was her response instinctive, a product of exhaustion? The memories he had embedded did not alter the fact that they were soulmates. Kurenai and Asuma had described it as being each other's anchors. Post-mission, their mutual yearning for contact and closeness was intense and undeniable. Asuma would tease that they couldn't keep their hands off each other, much to Kurenai's chagrin, yet she never contested it.

Sakura vanished through the window with a slight wave, and he observed her as she climbed to the adjacent rooftop before vanishing from view. He watched with a fond smile as the ears of her slippers fluttered in the breeze while she dashed away.

XX

Sakura awoke feeling more relaxed than she had in months, despite her sleep being interrupted. She smiled at the memory of Kakashi's effortless affection but her smile faded as she contemplated the conversation they would need to have today. Her memories remained a tangled mess, her fixation on Sasuke still tainting many of her childhood recollections, now conflicting with her newfound feelings for Kakashi. Was it love that she felt for him? She was uncertain. She had believed she loved Sasuke, and he had certainly consumed her thoughts for years as she dreamed of a future where they married and had children. She could acknowledge that the memory of him was still appealing. She missed him and longed for his return to Konoha and Team 7. But was that love?

Her thoughts drifted to Kakashi, her lazy, perverted sensei who had always seemed indifferent to her. Kakashi, who had instilled fabricated memories of a warm friendship that never existed. Did he have regrets about his treatment of her? Did he wish he had been as attentive to her as he was to the boys? Or was he attempting to conceal two years of neglect? It was challenging to reconcile the persona he projected with the person he truly was. Distant and cautious, yet incredibly perceptive. She endeavored to understand his perspective, discovering a soulmate significantly younger and still a child, after years of presuming he had none. How difficult was that adjustment for him? How would she have coped? She considered his past, especially his father's fate. He had never divulged how his father died, but inquiries to Shizune uncovered the tale of Konoha's White Fang and his tragic end. All who were dear to him had passed away—his parents, teammates, and mentor, yet his father had chosen to leave him by his own hand. Why? Tears fell as she imagined losing her own parents, witnessing Sasuke's death, or being compelled to end Naruto's life. The sorrow was nearly crushing as she visualized Kakashi lifeless body, his eyes devoid of any spark. Her loved ones were safe for now, but who would she become if that changed? Would she grow bitter like Sasuke, seeking revenge? Or would she emulate Kakashi, detached and closed off, even from his soulmate?

She doubted she could ever forgive what he had done to her. No matter his intentions, the reality remained unchanged, and no genjutsu could alter that truth. She recognized his ignorance on how to treat her, yet he inflicted more pain than necessary, merely to protect himself. Despite this, she missed him deeply. His absence left a keen pain, and only by sleeping in his bed, surrounded by reminders of him, could she find some solace. She had hoped that with his return, peaceful sleep would once again be possible.

She reached Kakashi's apartment early to find that he had already left. This didn't worry her much; Tsunade had to be informed of his return, and he might have gone to the hospital to check on his injuries, however slight. No note was left for her, yet she spent the morning organizing his tidy apartment. Afterwards, she took a book on genjutsu from his shelf and settled on his bed to read. With the day off and no expectations to be at the hospital or the Hokage tower, she wasn't troubled by the thought of someone searching for her. She focused on learning about the residual effects of genjutsu, particularly those that alter the mind, understanding the importance of being aware of any possible aftereffects following the unintentional dispelling of the genjutsu he had cast on her.

XX

Tsunade seemed pleased with his report, yet Kakashi sensed anger in her, even as she commended his actions. It appeared she had more to say but restrained herself in Shizune's presence. Eager to depart, he dismissed her recommendation to visit the hospital.

Tsunade's voice halted him just as he was about to depart. "Oh, and Kakashi?"

“Yes, Hokage-sama?” he inquired respectfully.

"Your medical records are outdated. It is imperative that you undergo your annual physical examination this year, without fail. Have I made myself clear?"

Kakashi tensed at the implied threat in her stance and nodded. "Of course, Hokage-sama."

“Good, now beat it.”

He let out a deep sigh as he neared his apartment. The thought of an annual physical was inconceivable. Sakura's mark must be documented somewhere, and if his own mark were found, the fallout from his negligence would be dire. He might claim ignorance, yet he suspected Tsunade was vigilantly monitoring both him and Sakura. After all, Sakura was her protégé, and Tsunade appeared to hold her in high regard. He couldn't fault Tsunade for protecting Sakura's feelings, something he himself had neglected to do over the years.

As he neared, he was aware of Sakura's presence, his senses heightening in response to her. Her scent was carried on the breeze, faint yet discernible to only a Hatake or perhaps an Inuzuka. The familiar fragrance of Pakkun’s Floral Green shampoo, used by her that morning, brought a smile to his face. The sound of her fingers brushing against the pages of his book reached him, and he pictured her, nestled in his blankets, her pink hair falling towards the book she was bent over. He made his entrance through the window suddenly, capturing her surprised look before swiftly pulling her to her feet. He needed to touch and taste her to satisfy his senses. He wrapped his arms around her, sliding his mask down as he gently pressed his lips to her forehead. As she trembled within his embrace, he caught himself and, with a sense of shame, pulled his mask back up, observing as her eyes fluttered open.

“Kakashi? What was that?”

He shrugged, adopting his usual slouch with hands plunged deep into his pockets to avoid touching her. "The mission was too long. I apologize, Sakura."

Sakura nodded as if his vague statement was explanation enough. It wasn't. His behavior was inappropriate, yet it was all too simple to slip into the familiarity of the previous night. To yield to his desire to reach out to her and to have that desire returned. However, from her expression, it was clear she had made a decision—one he was likely not going to like.

"We need to talk," Sakura stated softly, her eyes firm with determination, causing him to recoil. "I'm not sure what's happening here," she said, motioning between them, her agitation clear. "But it can't go on, for obvious reasons."

"Yes," Kakashi concurred, for what else was there to say? He conjured up the image of her in heart-adorned pajamas, donning her whimsical slippers, along with a myriad of other recollections of Sakura's youthful antics, to reassure himself of the necessity of this moment, that she was right in her judgement.

“I think I know why you used your Sharingan on me,” Sakura speculated, “but I need to hear your explanation.”

“So you remember.”

"Yes," Sakura scowled, "and no. I can't discern what's real from what isn't anymore. Can you grasp how terrifying that is?"

"No," Kakashi admitted with honesty. The turmoil on her face filled him with self-loathing, and his only desire was to alleviate it. "Altering your memories was a mistake I should not have made. However, I can remove the lingering memories, so you can distinguish what was real."

"Do you actually expect me to trust you?" Sakura inquired, her voice laden with disbelief.

"You have no reason to," Kakashi conceded. "But hurting you was never my intention," he continued, despite Sakura's skeptical snort. "My desire was for your happiness, Sakura. Yet, from the moment we met, I've failed to bring you even a moment of joy. As a sensei, I was dreadful, and your anger and distrust are justified. Seeing the pain in your eyes," his voice faltered, recalling her tormented expression. Why, Kakashi? "I realized then, no matter what, I couldn't bear to see you cry because of me again."

"So, you fashioned yourself as the ideal sensei? You made your behaviour look better to compensate for your guilt?" Sakura asked, her fists clenched in fury upon his disclosure.

"I never meant to do that," Kakashi declared. "It was an unintended benefit." A soulmate is the person that loves you most. These were the words his mother had told him, and they echoed in his mind. Despite his attempts to deny it, he realized he had never loved anyone as much as Sakura, who now looked at him with a face contorted by rage. He had let her down in countless ways, yet tampering with her memories was the gravest of his transgressions.

Minato frequently shared stories of his parents with him, even when Kakashi expressed his resentment towards his father. Perhaps they were just stories, perhaps embellished, but Minato had no motive to deceive him. There was never any distrust between them, and regardless of the errors Sakumo had made, Minato convinced him that his mother had passed away content, cherished by her husband to the very end. Kakashi felt he couldn't even accomplish that much.

"Sakura, I'm not seeking your forgiveness. No explanation can undo what I've done or lessen its impact. The pain you endured, the experiences you had, they were all due to my actions," he said with a heavy sigh. "I'm at a loss on how to improve things, how to make you happy," he confessed. "This is precisely why I never wanted a soulmate. I'm not like either Asuma nor my father."

"I don't want you to be anyone other than yourself," Sakura wept. "All I ever wanted was honesty! Don't you think I know that a relationship between us isn't possible? That our feelings are somehow wrong?"

"No," Kakashi stated firmly, "it's not wrong. It's simply not the right time."

Sakura's shoulders drooped. "Is there ever going to be a right time, Kakashi?"

Kakashi gently lifted Sakura's chin, ensuring their eyes met. "Sakura, there will come a day when nothing can keep me away from you. Yet, at a single word from you, I'll step back. You are entitled to a life of normalcy and joy, and I am committed to doing everything within my power to ensure that you have it."

"You deserve that as well, Kakashi," Sakura asserted. "But I still need time. My feelings for you are so intense that they frighten me."

Kakashi gazed into her green eyes, offering a reassuring smile. "It's okay, Sakura. I've waited this long," he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Concentrate on yourself, on your needs and wants. Don't concern yourself with me at the moment."

"Why does it feel like you're saying goodbye?" Sakura gripped his vest tightly, fear evident in her voice.  

"I'm not," Kakashi insisted. "I'm simply suggesting you wait. Wait until you're older."

“I can do that.” Sakura whispered.

"Good," Kakashi whispered, drawing her close once more, possibly for the final time. He had no intention of saying goodbye, no intention of moving on, yet he recognized Sakura was still growing. She was not yet fully matured, and the desires and emotions she held now might become aching memories in years to come. He knew he had to allow her the space to find her own path. Inhaling deeply, he committed her scent to memory, the sensation of her presence, the aura of her chakra reaching out to his own, cementing this moment in his mind. Words had gone unspoken, no vows or soulmarks revealed, yet it marked both a beginning and an ending, and it held significance.

XX

Eventually Naruto returned and the first thing he did was bang on her door. She didn’t know how he got her address, but it didn’t matter. Sakura greeted him with an exuberant hug, tears of joy streaming down her cheeks. He pushed her away and eagerly began to strip off his pants. Sakura could only watch with mounting horror at his bright orange boxers.

“Naruto, you idiot! What are you-?"

"Look!" Naruto exclaimed with excitement. "I have my mark!" He pointed proudly to the sun-shaped mark just above his knee, identical to the one Hinata had revealed months earlier. "What's your mark?" he asked with anticipation.

She sighed, observing the hope in his eyes and shook her head sadly. "Mine isn't a sun, Naruto."

“Oh,” Naruto’s face fell, disappointed by the news. “I should have known. I wonder what Sasuke's is?" 

"Well, there's no way my mark matches his!" Sakura declared emphatically.

Naruto brightened at her declaration and immediately started telling her about his time away.

“Naruto, you idiot,” Sakura interrupted with a pointed glare at the pants that were still around his ankles.

“Oh, Sorry Sakura!” Naruto grinned sheepishly as he pulled his pants up.

Sakura rolled her eyes at his antics, immeasurably pleased to have him back. She didn’t immediately announce who his soulmate was. It felt cruel to keep it from him, but Sakura didn’t want Naruto to overwhelm Hinata on his return. The poor girl might have a heart attack and die if he were to drop his pants in front of her.

She and Kakashi were not deliberately avoiding one another; rather, there was a tacit understanding to allow each other space following the revelations from both parties. When Naruto extended an invitation to join him and Kakashi at Ichiraku, she politely declined.

"But he's offering to pay!" Naruto complained. "Kakashi-sensei never foots the bill! And maybe this time, we'll actually get to see his face!"

Sakura shut her eyes, recalling the feel of Kakashi's lips on her forehead. She had her opportunity, but fear held her back. "It's alright, Naruto. I've promised Hinata a lunch together, just us," she stated firmly as Naruto began to extend an invitation.

Naruto embraced her once more, and she was struck by his increased height. Puberty had certainly done him favors. While his voice had not deepened significantly, he had matured considerably over two years. His shoulders had widened, and his jawline sharpened, the baby fat on his cheeks giving way, yet the distinctive whisker marks remained. "Hey, Sakura?"

“Yes, Naruto?”

“Maybe you should invite Hinata to lunch next time? I haven’t seen her yet. It would be nice to catch up!” Naruto scratched his head nervously. “If she wants to that is.”

“Of course she does, Naruto! She missed you too!”

“Really?” Naruto’s smile looked wide enough to break his face. “That’s great!”

Sakura rolled her eyes at how oblivious he still was. She was going to have to lock these two in a closet if she wanted anything to happen. “Go, Naruto! You don’t want to keep Kakashi-sensei waiting for too long.”

Naruto dashed away, waving over his shoulder. Sakura watched him go, tears of joy in her eyes. She could hardly believe he was finally home. It was as if she had her brother back, and she knew Kakashi would share her happiness.

Chapter Text

Before Sakura and Naruto could be reassigned to missions, they were informed that they would face Kakashi in another bell test to evaluate the training they had received from Tsunade and Jiraiya. Sakura thought it was fitting to match them against their former sensei. Despite the tension in their relationship, she was eager to demonstrate the skills she had acquired beyond medical ninjutsu.

Training Ground Three resurrected painful memories for Sakura and Naruto, making Sakura question if Kakashi had intentionally chosen this location to unsettle them, especially Naruto. With Sasuke's memory still vivid, Naruto's once exuberant mood plummeted. Sakura found herself slipping back into the familiar well of sorrow and loss. Sasuke wasn't dead, yet she was starting to accept that his departure from the village might be permanent. She fervently hoped he would abandon his current path and rejoin them, restoring their team and the sense of family that Naruto relied on. She recognized that Kakashi, too, missed Sasuke and carried the burden of self-blame for not being a more effective mentor. Looking around, she envisioned them as if it were days, not years ago: Sasuke with his arrogance, Naruto with his boundless faith, and herself, grappling with her evolving feelings for both Kakashi and Sasuke.

Kakashi vanished, eluding them with ease, but Sakura anticipated his next move. Once she deduced his location, a smirk played on her lips, and she was eager to demonstrate her newfound skills. Slipping on her gloves, she directed a chakra-infused punch towards the ground. The earth fractured, emitting a gratifying crack, and shifted beneath them, making Naruto stagger. Sakura's triumphant smile broadened as Kakashi emerged, his eyes wide and an expression of awe on his face.

“I found you,” she crowed, pleased by his shock.

Adrenaline surged through her veins as Kakashi came to his senses. Sakura shivered, noticing his stare filled with open admiration and perhaps an inappropriate level of appreciation. She frowned at him, yet her blood sang under his intense gaze. She fervently hoped Naruto couldn't decipher Kakashi's expression. Her concern was unnecessary; when she glanced at Naruto, she found his attention riveted on her, mirroring Kakashi's admiration.

“Focus Naruto!” she snapped, flustered by Kakashi and irritated that Naruto still seemed to have a crush on her. She resolved to let him know about Hinata as soon as there was a chance.

The test unfolded similarly to the previous one, with Kakashi subjecting them to the same challenges, which they now passed with ease. She considered allowing the genjutsu to continue just to converse with the illusion of Sasuke a bit longer. Beside her, she could sense Naruto's quivering presence, deeply stirred by the vision before them. It was a harsh tactic on Kakashi's part, yet it was essential to gauge their development. She recognized that the image of Sasuke was not real, and her impulse to rush toward him was subdued, bringing her relief. It appeared she had indeed moved beyond her fixation on Sasuke. She had thought she was getting to know Kakashi, but witnessing the breadth of his knowledge and skills was exhilarating. Her respect for him as a shinobi was justified, a sentiment Naruto echoed with his unabashed praise of their teacher.

Even with her unique insight into Kakashi's character, she remained perplexed about how to defeat him. If only she were adept in genjutsu, she might have a chance by conjuring an illusion of Rin to distract him. Other than stripping naked She was clueless about what might distract Kakashi until Naruto demonstrated his growth as a tactician. It was an underhanded tactic with no likelihood of success in real combat except against Kakashi, but by sunrise, they had their bells, and Kakashi was just thankful that his anticipation for Make-out Tactics wasn't spoiled. She saw it as an added perk that Naruto had to clean the Academy bathrooms for three days as a punishment for reading an adult book.

Reuniting under the banner of Team Kakashi, Sakura felt a genuine possibility of bringing Sasuke back safely. Both she and Naruto had grown significantly during their separation, and she no longer saw herself as a burden to her team. While she might never match Naruto or Sasuke in skill or chakra reserves, she was gradually growing into the kunoichi she had envisioned in her youth. Through all the challenges, Kakashi had guided her on this journey, and Naruto's unwavering faith in her never faltered.

Time swiftly moved on, and soon Gaara was abducted while Kankuro suffered from poisoning. Team Kakashi received the mission to assist Suna in Gaara's rescue. This presented Sakura with an opportunity to apply her training to save Kankuro's life. Separated from Naruto and Kakashi, she had no time to consider the danger they were in, as her focus was on surviving the battle with Sasori. It was amidst Sasori's poisonous cloud that Sakura recalled her vow to be less dependent on her teammates and to save herself, thus not hindering their progress. She pondered over Kakashi losing another teammate and the deeper impact it might have, given that she was his soulmate. Although they had never openly acknowledged their deep connection, there was an unspoken understanding between them. The presence of matching marks was unnecessary for her to confirm their bond. Dying here and leaving Kakashi alone was not an option. He had endured too much loss already, and she was determined to ensure he didn't lose anyone else.

Gai's competitive spirit hastened their journey home. Sakura had little opportunity to converse with Lee or Tenten before the race commenced. She vigilantly monitored Kakashi, who was debilitated and unable to move on his own after using his Mangekyo Sharingan. The sight of Kakashi piggybacking on Gai elicited mixed feelings in her; she was torn between amusement at his evident discomfort and concern for his frailty. With the crowd around, it wasn't her place to provide solace or comfort. Lee's observant gaze didn't escape her; he was aware of her and Kakashi's marks, yet remained silent. Although she hadn't informed him of her regained memories, his scrutiny suggested he had suspicions, especially as she stayed close to Gai's side. She was thankful when Gai safely transported an unconscious Kakashi to the hospital.

XX

Kakashi stirred awake, his head pounding and mouth parched. His fingers twitched within the grasp of a small, calloused hand, and as he opened his eye, he saw Sakura asleep in a chair beside his bed. They were alone in a private room, devoid of nurses or medical ninjas, and he felt a sense of gratitude for the intimate scene they created while holding hands.

"Kakashi, it's great to see that you're awake!"

Gai's loud voice caused him to startle, and he silenced his rival and closest friend with a meaningful glance towards Sakura. Fortunately, Sakura only stirred slightly, furrowing her brow and murmuring softly, but remained asleep. Kakashi was aware that he ought to remove his hand from Sakura's to avoid raising Gai's suspicions, yet he was still shaken by the explosion that had nearly claimed their lives. Had he not redirected the blast, Sakura would not have survived. He shut his eyes, haunted by the resignation and terror in hers as she fled the explosion's inferno, aware she couldn't outrun it. Reaction time had been minimal, and he had nearly lost her. There was no opportunity for farewells or contemplation. It was a rash act, and he bore the physical toll. However, the pain was inconsequential as long as Sakura slept safe and sound next to him. Thus, he kept holding her hand, challenging Gai with a defiant stare to make a comment.

Their bond had spanned nearly two decades, enabling them to understand each other's moods and communicate wordlessly. As Gai's eyes brimmed with tears and he gave a thumbs-up, Kakashi recognized Gai's comprehension and lack of judgment regarding Sakura's significance to him. A detailed conversation would follow later, but for the moment, Gai simply nodded, exiting the room silently, his face wet with joyful tears. Kakashi listened as Gai spoke to those outside, and a sigh of relief escaped him as the sounds of voices faded away. Sakura would soon awaken, and the uneasy tension would resume, but for now, he held her hand, watching over her with contentment as she slept peacefully beside him.

XX

Finally, the moment had come to confront Sasuke and possibly bring him back home. Despite the urgency, Kakashi was recuperating from the strain of his Sharingan. Sakura and Naruto met their new teammates: Sai and then Yamato, who would join them on this mission. Naruto was set on disliking Sai, seeing him as an inadequate substitute for Sasuke. Sakura was just as resolved to hold a grudge against Yamato for taking Kakashi's role. Nevertheless, they had their orders and departed as the reformed Team Kakashi. With too many onlookers, Sakura missed her chance to bid Kakashi farewell. He gave his usual smile, and she bent down in acceptance as he reached out to tousle her hair. Naruto also received the same affectionate gesture, responding with a contented smile. Then it was time to leave, and Sakura couldn't find a moment alone with Kakashi. Their eyes met, sharing an unspoken understanding, before she followed Naruto, heading towards Sasuke.

Get better Kakashi.

Stay safe, Sakura.

Sasuke ignored her, focusing solely on Naruto, whom he saw as the last obstacle in his quest to defeat Itachi. Despite Sakura's newfound strength and her vow to Naruto, she felt ineffective, and Yamato had to step in, getting hurt in the process. Afterward, Orochimaru forced Sasuke to retreat, and they vanished from sight. The mission failed, yet Sakura clung to the positives: Sai and Yamato had become trusted allies and friends. She had gained new teammates, and they had all survived another clash with Orochimaru. Although Naruto was bitter about their defeat, Sakura's understanding of Sasuke had deepened. She longed for the boy he once was, consumed by his family's loss and a drive to become stronger. She yearned for the person she hoped he would be, but she realized her feelings weren't true love. Sasuke was a symbol of a bygone dream, but she remained committed to bringing back the friend she held dear, a resolve she shared with Naruto.

XX

Kakashi was instructing Naruto in a technique that, if mastered, could eclipse the Fourth Hokage's abilities. Naruto's frustration was palpable as progress eluded him, yet Kakashi glimpsed the shadow of his own mentor within Naruto and rejoiced. He tried to articulate his emotions, much to the mortification of Naruto when they got the news. Asuma Sarutobi was dead, killed by Hidan of the Akatsuki.

Without Mirai, Kurenai would have been inconsolable. The infant wailed for hours after Kurenai experienced the agony of Asuma's death and saw her mark turn from bright crimson to a dull brown. Team 10 hurried back, and Shikamaru was the one who arrived at her doorstep to deliver the news. As Kurenai opened the door, Mirai's cries echoed from within the apartment, and Kurenai's eyes were red and puffy with tears. Seeing the anguish in Shikamaru's eyes, Kurenai immediately knew, collapsing at his feet in grief.

"She just won't stop crying, Shikamaru. Mirai has been crying for hours, and she refuses to eat. I don't know what to do," Kurenai whispered. "Asuma always knew how to calm her. He had such a way with her." Overcome with sorrow, Kurenai began to weep, her body shaking as she confronted the reality of Asuma's death. Shikamaru stepped past Kurenai into the room where Mirai was lying in her crib, her cries growing fainter by the minute. He gently lifted his goddaughter and carried her to Kurenai, kneeling down with Mirai nestled in his arms.

"Kurenai, she needs you. Mirai needs her mother at this moment," he said, extending her towards Kurenai. He observed as Kurenai tenderly accepted Mirai into her arms and held her tightly. Tears welled up in his eyes as he watched Kurenai begin to soothe Mirai with a gentle rocking motion.

"Shhh, Mirai. Everything will be alright. Mom is here, Mirai. Mom is here," Kurenai whispered. Gradually, Mirai became silent, comforted by Kurenai's gentle voice even in her sorrow.

They remained there for a while longer, seated on the floor by the open door. Shikamaru kept vigil over Kurenai as she held Mirai close, vowing to himself that he would look after both of them, Mirai and Kurenai. He would do it in memory of Asuma, and for his own sake as well.

XX

Naruto's training was still underway when the news of Asuma's death by the Akatsuki reached them. Naruto stood, paralyzed by confusion, struggling to accept the loss of someone he had looked up to. This loss was unlike the deaths of Granny Chiyo or Haku—individuals he had come to care for, who had embraced their end for causes they held dear. Asuma was someone they had known for years, and had Team Kakashi been assigned to that mission, Kakashi might have met the same fate. Asuma, who left behind a soulmate and a young daughter at home.

Sakura was horrified by the news, her thoughts immediately turning to Ino, Shikamaru, and Choji, who had just lost their sensei. She observed Kakashi with worry as he became more withdrawn, silently grappling with the death of his friend. Tears were shed, and she embraced Naruto, yet her gaze was fixed on Kakashi during the funeral, as he looked at Kurenai with an expression of profound loss. Another person gone from his life, and her heart ached not only for Kurenai, Team 10, and the child who would never know Asuma, but for Kakashi as well.

That night, Sakura went to his apartment and found it deserted. There was only one place where she anticipated he might be.

Kneeling at the cenotaph, his fists were clenched on his thighs while he gazed at the names of those he had lost. He could feel Sakura's presence behind him, but could not stop his body from trembling as he stifled the sobs that threatened to escape. He felt selfish; Kurenai had lost her soulmate, and Mirai, her father. What was his loss compared to theirs? Yet, he couldn't stop thinking about Asuma's younger days, his nature so sympathetic that he approached his father alongside Kurenai and Gai, suggesting Kakashi's discharge from Anbu. Kakashi hadn't appreciated it then, but it was a testament to Asuma's deep care for his friends. He remembered Asuma and Kurenai's happiness, the pure joy Asuma radiated holding his newborn daughter, with Kurenai glowing by his side. Among their peers, Asuma had the most to live for. Yet now, he was gone.

"It should have been me," Kakashi lamented. "I should be the one who's gone, and Asuma should be here with his family."

“No,” Sakura denied. She understood what Kakashi was saying and she couldn’t imagine the pain Kurenai was suffering but she could not bear to hear Kakashi wish himself in Asuma’s place. “No!” Sakura shouted at him. “There is nothing you can do for Asuma now and I can’t listen to you say that you would prefer to be dead in his place Kakashi. Maybe I’m being selfish and cruel, but I’m so damn happy that you’re alive, even if you’re grieving.”

Kakashi's eyes clenched shut, overwhelmed by the despair in Sakura's voice. Perhaps it was self-centered, but witnessing the impact of his careless wish on Sakura was unbearable. He tensed as Sakura's arms encircled his shoulders, her lips pressing against the nape of his neck. "I'm sorry, Kakashi. I'm deeply sorry for your loss, and for Kurenai's and Shikamaru's. I know you must be in so much pain. But remember, I'm here, and I'm not leaving. There's nothing I can do for them, but for you, I'm here whenever you need me."

Kakashi relaxed under her touch as her dampened cheeks pressed into his hair. “I know,” he said softly. “I’m sorry.”

"Don't apologize, Kakashi. Just remain here. Promise that you'll stay with me."

"I can't guarantee I'll always be here," Kakashi expressed with a sense of sorrow. "However, Sakura, I am yours for as long as you'll want me."

"Me too, Kakashi. Remember that I belong to you as well."

They ended up at Kakashi’s apartment. They communicated without words, Sakura stripping to a tank top and underwear as Kakashi pulled his shirt with the attached mask over his head and slid into his bed beside her. Exhausted and heartbroken in a way Sakura's healing chakra couldn't mend, he didn't dwell on his sorrow but instead drew her close. Sakura lay beside him, observing his unmasked face for the first time with a mix of sadness and affection. Despite his weary and forlorn appearance, he was, to her, the epitome of beauty. Gently, she traced the scar over his eye and cheek, caressing Kakashi's jawline as he returned her gaze. Her fingertips lightly brushed his lips, glided down his straight nose, and lingered on the mole just below the left corner of his mouth. She noted the contrast between the tan line imprinted by his mask and the untouched paleness of his skin beneath it. The reason for his openness was a mystery, yet she treasured the trust he had bestowed upon her.

Kakashi chose to reveal his true self to Sakura, weary of concealing his innermost thoughts and emotions, and of isolating himself from the world when faced with adversity. Trust did not come easily to him, and perhaps it never would, but with Sakura, he felt a sense of certainty. The gratitude reflected in Sakura's eyes, for both his vulnerability and his appearance, filled him with contentment. As Sakura shifted closer on the bed, her hand found its way to the nape of his neck, gently coaxing his face down to hers. A sigh escaped Kakashi as their lips met in a fleeting kiss.

“Sakura, I don’t-”

“It’s okay, Kakashi. I’m not pushing for anything. I just wanted to let you know I’m here.” She kissed him again softly and his lips parted against hers, deepening the kiss in sudden desperation.He simply wished to escape the world beyond this room for a while.

He pushed her to her back and leaned over her, tongue slipping into her welcoming mouth. Her thighs parted for him instinctively and he pressed himself against her as he kissed her. When it grew hard to breathe, Kakashi pulled away, staring at Sakura’s flushed cheeks and bright eyes with sudden shame. He grasped the psychological impact. Having been on multiple missions where a sudden death or near-death experience intensified the need to reaffirm life, he was no stranger to this phenomenon. He’d slept with other Jounin during the aftermath of these missions, but the encounters ultimately meant nothing. He was grateful for the women that shared his bed and they felt the same, but he’d never entered a relationship with them afterwards. It wasn’t about tenderness or affection and both parties understood this. He was reluctant to place Sakura in such a situation. She was more than just a convenient body, and he refused to treat her as such.

He rolled away from her and lay on his back, the heat of passion fading into a heavy guilt within his chest. "I'm sorry, Sakura. I shouldn't have done that."

“I’m not,” Sakura insisted. “I’m here for you in any way that you need.”

Kakashi turned toward her, his smile reflecting the determination that contrasted with her disheveled hair and rosy cheeks. "Thank you, Sakura, for being here," he said. Drawing her close once more, he rested his chin atop her head. "I need to sleep now, but I'd be grateful if you stayed with me tonight."

Sakura murmured her agreement, relaxing in his embrace. Kakashi expressed gratitude to whatever powers that had granted him a person as generous and warm as Sakura. He drifted off to sleep, enveloped in her fragrance, the softness of her touch, and the rhythm of her breath, thankful for once that he was the one to survive.

XX

As time went by, Sakura and Kakashi continued to avoid discussing their soulmarks. Sakura hadn't stayed over at Kakashi's place in the following months, yet he was aware of her support whenever he needed it. Sakura realized that Kakashi's lack of acknowledgment for the progress in their relationship wasn't a sign of rejection; he was simply giving her time to mature. They had already overstepped numerous boundaries, but it seemed that as long as they didn't vocalize their feelings or advance their relationship beyond its current state, things would eventually fall into place. It might have been naïve and imprudent, but those close to them showed no signs of suspecting the true depth of their bond. Yamato was preoccupied with Naruto's mastery over the Nine-Tails, Sai took a too literal approach to his readings on human behavior, and Naruto, as always, was clueless about his surroundings unless it involved Sasuke or his training.

One afternoon at Sakura's apartment, Sakura disclosed Naruto's soulmark to Hinata. Amidst their busy schedules and the looming threat of the Akatsuki, opportunities for conversation were scarce. Hinata acknowledged her and Lee's suspicion about Sakura regaining her memories. Sakura recounted the episode with Tsunade and her coping with Kakashi's deceit. Hinata, not siding with Kakashi, nonetheless understood that he acted in what he believed to be her best interest, not out of selfishness. Hinata also shared that Lee met his soulmate at Ichiraku, thanks to Naruto's invitation. Ayame's beauty and her timid smile as she served him ramen captivated Lee instantly, marking the beginning of their story. This revelation shed light on Lee's recent absence from training sessions with Hinata, a development that Sakura was joyful about. Lee deserved all the happiness in the world.

"I wonder what Gai-sensei's thoughts are on this," Sakura pondered. "Ayame is a few years older than Lee. How are they managing?" she inquired of Hinata. "After all, Lee is just sixteen, and Ayame is about to turn twenty."

Hinata smiled broadly. "It has created quite a stir. Ayame has declared to her father that she intends to marry Lee on his seventeenth birthday. They have already received Gai-sensei's approval. Teuchi-sama was so taken aback that he closed Ichiraku for an entire day to recover from the shock."

"That explains why Naruto was in such a bad mood recently," Sakura declared. "He said Ichiraku was closed and grumbled all day about being hungry."

Hinata's cheeks flushed at the mention of Naruto, and she fidgeted nervously with her hands in her lap. "How is Naruto doing, Sakura? I haven't seen him around the village much since he came back. It seems like Team Kakashi is always on a mission."

Sakura frowned, filled with guilt at Hinata’s wistful expression. “Hinata, I’m so sorry! I promised Naruto I would invite you for ramen with us but with Asuma’s death and the Akatsuki there never seemed to be the right time.”

“It’s okay, Sakura! Please don’t feel guilty on my behalf! I know you and Naruto have more important things to deal with.” Hinata tried to placate Sakura but her self-deprecation only made Sakura feel guiltier.

“Hinata, there’s something I should have told you already.”

“What is it Sakura?” Hinata asked nervously at Sakura’s serious expression.

“Naruto showed me his soulmark when he got back from his training with Jiraiya.”

Hinata’s expression fell at Sakura’s apologetic expression. “It’s okay Sakura. I understand. I shouldn’t have got my hopes up. There was no chance that someone as amazing as Naruto would have the same soulmark as me.”

“What? That’s not what I was trying to say at all!” Sakura hurried to say. “Naruto’s mark matches yours! I’m just sorry it took so long to tell you.”

Sakura watched as Hinata’s expression went through a multitude of expressions from disbelief, joy, fear, sorrow and back to disbelief. “Naruto’s mark matches mine?” Hinata whispered.

“Yes,” Sakura confirmed with a huge grin. “Naruto is your soulmate.” Hinata blinked once and then fainted, crumpling gracefully to the floor. Sakura shook her head in exasperation. “I really should have expected that.”

When Hinata woke up she begged Sakura not to tell Naruto about their soulmarks. “Why?” Sakura whined. “You could go tell him right now and be dating by the end of the day! Isn’t that what you want?”

“Yes,” Hinata confirmed with a shy smile. “I would be beyond happy to date Naruto, but I don’t want him to feel obligated to be with me just because we’re soulmates. I want him to like me for me. Is that too much to ask?”

Sakura frowned in consideration. “I guess that makes sense but you two are soulmates. You belong together!”

“Sakura,” Hinata hesitated. “I don’t mean to offend you, but have you ever felt that you and Kakashi-sensei wouldn’t be together if you weren’t soulmates? Do you think you’d still like Sasuke if you didn’t know about Kakashi-sensei?”

Sakura’s face drained of color as she thought of the possibilities and consequences. Would Kakashi be with someone else if she wasn’t his soulmate? Was he involved with anyone when he’d found out? What if he’d dated someone in the two years before she’d implied he’d been jealous of her date with Lee? Did he still want to date someone else while he waited for her? What if he met someone else who was better than her and more age-appropriate? “Hinata,” her voice wavered. “you’re right. What if I’m holding Kakashi back? He said he would wait for me, but is that really fair?”

“Oh no!” Hinata cried with dismay. “I didn’t mean it like that! Kakashi-sensei loves you, I know it! You should have seen him when he used his Sharingan on you. He was so sad at the thought of rejecting you and said he was waiting for you to grow up, Sakura.”

“He shouldn’t have to wait for me to grow up,” Sakura said bitterly. “He should have a soulmate his age that can support him and love him openly because I can’t.”

“You’re sixteen, Sakura. One more year until you’re an adult. Then you and Kakashi can be together without consequences. That’s not that long,” Hinata offered tentatively.

“But will anyone really be able to accept us? What will Shishou think? And my parents? What if Naruto hates us?” Sakura clenched her fists and wiped away a tear in dejection.

“What if they don’t like it?” Hinata said with a sudden ferocity. “Will you give Kakashi up? Will you reject him?”

“Of course not!” Sakura scoffed. She’d waited this long and there was no chance that she was walking away from him. “But what if Kakashi realizes how this will make him look? What if someone convinces him that I’m not worth it?” Sakura’s lips quivered as she brought up fears she’d hidden deep down, even from herself. Despite Kakashi’s reassurances she couldn’t help but be afraid that she wouldn’t be enough.

Hinata put a hand on Sakura’s shoulder, squeezing gently. “I know it’s hard Sakura, but I believe with all my heart that Kakashi-sensei loves you more than anything and he wouldn’t walk away from you. Don’t you trust him?”

“Of course, I do,” Sakura whispered. She thought of Kakashi revealing his face and his grief and exhaustion to her without hesitation. He trusted her enough to bare everything to her in a vulnerable moment, and she could only offer the same in return. “You’re right Hinata. I did have those kinds of thoughts and I still do. But I don’t think Kakashi would hurt me intentionally and I do trust him.”

“Good,” Hinata said with a relieved sigh. “I’m sorry for suggesting that Kakashi-sensei didn’t want you as a soulmate. I just wanted you to understand how I feel about Naruto. I would have loved him even if he wasn’t my soulmate. But I don’t know if he could ever feel the same way. He’s never given an indication that he cares for anyone except you.” Hinata said sadly.

“Hinata, Naruto is like a brother to me. And I think he feels the same way about me. We’re past that now.”

“Maybe,” Hinata assented “but that doesn’t mean that Naruto sees me as more than a friend. We hardly interact, and I can’t even look him in the eye when we do talk. Maybe it’s not meant to be.”

“It will work out,” Sakura said with conviction. “I know I’m getting frustrated about this situation with Kakashi, but you and Naruto are still young. You have years to work things out. At this point I don’t think anyone could really hurt Naruto. He always seems to come out stronger than he was before. Kakashi on the other hand,” Sakura sighed thinking of the dozens of close-calls Kakashi had. “He takes too many risks. I’m just glad that I can heal him now.”

“You make it seem like you’re so much older than us,” Hinata teased, trying to lighten the mood. “Should I start calling you Granny Sakura?”

“Shut up,” Sakura grumbled. “Kakashi’s made me age twice as fast as you two. When I’m his age I’ll look like I’m fifty.”

Hinata giggled and Sakura burst into laughter at her own dramatics.

XX

Sakura kept her word and didn’t let Naruto know about Hinata’s matching soulmark. And once again, regrettably there was very little time for Sakura to arrange a date between Naruto and Hinata. After they discovered that Sasuke had killed both Orochimaru and Itachi, time moved too quickly and Konoha was hard pressed to keep up.

It was Kakashi and Sakura that stood beside Naruto when he was informed of Jiraiya’s death at the hands of the Akatsuki’s leader Pein. Sakura defended Tsunade against the accusations Naruto made against her, blaming her for sending Jiraiya to his death. Sakura went later to Tsunade to beg forgiveness for Naruto’s thoughtless words. She knew he was grieving and felt he needed space before she confronted him. When she found her Shishou, Tsunade was drunk.

“Ah, Sakura! Did you come to apologize for Naruto?” she hiccupped and glared accusingly at the bottle of sake she held in her fist. “There’s no need. He’s right.”

“Shishou,” Sakura protested. “He didn’t mean it.”

Tsunade waved away her protest and tried to laugh it off, but it ended up being somewhere between a gasp and sob as she remembered her last conversation with Jiraiya. “I didn’t think I could love anyone after my soulmate Dan died.” She admitted morosely. “I didn’t want to love anyone else. Once was enough. But sometimes your own heart betrays you.” Tsunade threw her sake bottle in a sudden fit of rage. “And Jiraiya of all people! That perverted no-good, idiot, foolish man! How can he do this to me? I asked him to come back, Sakura. And he promised me he would. He promised.” Tsunade dissolved into tears, Sakura glimpsing her true age for the first time as Tsunade forgot everything in her grief. Sakura was frozen on the spot, unsure how to comfort her Shishou. She moved towards her with an extended hand when Tsunade suddenly looked up and pinned her in place with a fierce gaze. “Promise me one thing Sakura.”

Sakura swallowed hard but nodded. “Anything Shishou.”

“Promise me, when you meet your soulmate, don’t hesitate. Even if you fall in love with someone who isn’t your soulmate, don’t hesitate. Life is too short not to grab every moment of happiness you can, especially for a shinobi. Trust me, Sakura. I’ve loved two men in my life. One was my soulmate and died too soon. The other was my perverted teammate and I realized too late that I loved him in return. I missed my chance Sakura.” Tsunade reached for her hand and gripped it painfully. “Promise me you won’t Sakura.”

“I promise Shishou.” Sakura met her desperate gaze with a determined one of her own. “I won’t let Kakashi go, no matter what.”

“Good,” Tsunade murmured, not comprehending anything Sakura said past her promise. Tsunade’s shoulders slouched in sudden exhaustion. “That’s good, Sakura.”

Shizune came into the room and sighed at what she saw. “Oh, Lady Tsunade.” She grabbed Tsunade’s arm and pulled it over her shoulder, ready to take her to her room.

“You too Shizune!” Tsunade yelled. “Promise me that you will go to see Genma Shiranui and sort out this mix up!”

Shizune’s eyes rounded and her mouth opened in shock at Tsunade’s proclamation. “Lady Tsunade! I told you about Genma in confidence!”

Sakura watched Shizune drag Tsunade out with a melancholy expression. She had no idea that Tsunade had loved Jiraiya. Naruto had once confessed that Jiraiya was besotted with Tsunade, even basing one of his main characters off her, but she had no idea that he’d loved her as well. Despite her loyalty to Konoha, Sakura wondered at the price shinobi paid to serve. Too many of them grew up twisted and worn down and unable to seize their own happiness because of past hang-ups. Kakashi was only another example. If Tsunade’s words were true, it seemed that Asuma, Kurenai and possibly Gai were the only ones to make it to adulthood relatively unscathed or at least gave the appearance of being semi-well adjusted. As much as Sakura admired Shizune, she wasn’t willing to play matchmaker. She had a hard-enough time trying to sort out Hinata and Naruto, without much success.

XX

Kakashi and Sakura were separated during Pein’s assault, Sakura to help at the hospital with the many injured, and Kakashi to face off with one of the paths. Sakura worried about Kakashi, but she trusted in his abilities and hoped that Naruto would arrive soon to ease his burden. She focused on healing the dozens upon dozens of injured shinobi and civilians that arrived at the hospital and ignored the tight knot of fear that had started to gather in her chest.

War was nothing less than cruel and merciless in Kakashi’s opinion. He knew there were shinobi dying around him, but he could not save them all and he couldn’t focus on saving them when he was hard-pressed to complete his own mission. To find that there were six paths was almost more than the village could handle as everything they loved was destroyed around them. Kakashi was backed by Choza and his team, as well as Choji, Asuma’s old student. They beat the Asura path but were quickly overwhelmed by the Deva path. Kakashi understood that this would be a fight to the death. And he wasn’t sure what side he would end up on. Choza’s entire team fell, until there was only Kakashi trapped in the rubble and too weak to break free. Choji lived and it was the only hope Kakashi had to warn Tsunade and possibly save the remaining village from Pein.

“Run Choji!” he implored. Run and live. It was what Asuma would have wanted.

As the missile fired by the Asura path chased Choji, Kakashi used the last of his chakra to warp away the missile with Kamui. He could immediately feel his chakra paths shutting down and he knew that he’d gone too far and could go no farther.

“I’m sorry Sakura.” Kakashi’s head fell forward, his eyes shutting to the sight of Sakura’s smiling face and he knew no more.

XX

His father was just as he remembered, with a broader face and deeper laugh lines than Kakashi. They were said to resemble each other, and they did with their silver hair and dark eyes, but Minato often said that Kakashi resembled his mother even more. His mother had dark hair and grey eyes and could be considered plain at first glance but Sakumo told Kakashi that first appearances were always deceiving, and his mother was the most beautiful woman he’d ever met. Her skin was fair and clear, her nose delicate and straight. Her lips were full and often quirked into a crooked smile that matched Kakashi’s own. When Sakumo used to stare at Kakashi with tenderness, he knew that his father saw his mother in his face.

“I miss your mother still, Kakashi,” the ghost of his father told him with regret. “Sometimes I forget what she looks like, waiting here. You’ve helped me remember.”

“I’m sorry for hating you for so long, Father.”

“I never blamed you for that,” Sakumo reassured him. “You took my death so hard, after all.”

“I understand why you chose to save your comrades,” Kakashi whispered. “And I think it was the right decision. I’m proud of you for it.”

Sakumo’s eyes widened in disbelief and he smiled sadly. “But can you forgive me for it and for everything else?”

“I have,” Kakashi promised. “I thought I wouldn’t be able to, but recently I realized that you did your best and I had to let go of my resentment.”

“But you’re still here,” Sakumo said unhappily. Here being a place of regrets and unfulfilled dreams.

“Yes,” Kakashi agreed thinking of Sakura. He’d promised to be there for her and now she was alone. Sixteen years old and he wouldn’t be able to save her from this heartbreak. Not this time. “I made a promise and I won’t be able to keep it now.”

Sakumo’s took in his son’s broken expression mournfully. “I had hoped that you would have a soulmate, so you could have someone to look after you.” Sakumo said. “But this must be hard for them. You’re too young.”

“Her name is Sakura,” Kakashi laughed bitterly at the irony of his father’s words. “She’s sixteen.”

“I see.” Sakumo said. “Despite not being there to watch you grow up, I know what’s going on in that head of yours Kakashi. Does she know you’re her soulmate?”

“Yes,” Kakashi confirmed. “And we we’re going to wait until she was older for a relationship. But I’m not a good man. Sometimes I couldn’t wait. I know what her lips taste like, I know what it feels like to hold her as she sleeps in my bed. I don’t think I could have stood by if she chose someone over me, no matter how much I told myself I would step back.” Kakashi laughed shakily. “I want her to be happy, but I want her to be happy with me.”

Sakumo nodded knowingly. “It’s the nature of the marks and the bonds that are formed with them. Fate has dealt you a cruel blow son but you’re not a bad person for wanting your soulmate.”

Kakashi rejected his father’s words with a shake of his head. “She was twelve years old when I met her and my student. I could barely wait until she was fifteen before I kissed her. It wears on me every day that she’s there and I must hide what she means to me. When she’s hurt, when she’s crying, it can’t be my place to step into that role and comfort her.”

Sakumo sighed at his son’s turmoil. “I’m sorry, Kakashi. It seems that you and I will be stuck here for a while.” Perhaps until his soulmate died and could absolve him of his sins as Sakumo could not.

“If only I’d had a few more years,” Kakashi wished selfishly.

“And one day you will come to terms with that,” Sakumo assured him. “You have all the time in the world in this place, and I won’t leave you alone as I was.” Even if his regrets had been assuaged by his son, he couldn’t bear to leave him in this place alone.

“Thank you, Father, for everything but you don’t need to stay with me. Mother has waited long enough for you.”

“Kakashi, my son.” Sakumo reached over and stroked his hair affectionately. “I’m so proud of the man you’ve become, and I’m sure that Sakura is too.”

They fell into a comfortable silence, and Kakashi contemplated the battle with Pein. He hoped Naruto had arrived and that Sakura was safe. She deserved to live a long life and he hoped she did. It seemed like only moments passed, and as Kakashi was resigning himself to spending an eternity alone, no matter what his father said, he felt a strange tug on his body. He heard his father’s gasp and frowned in confusion as he was bathed in a green light and lifted into the air while his father remained seated.

“What’s happening?”

Sakumo smiled in delight, “It seems like its not your time. Say hello to Sakura for me.”

Kakashi’s eyes met his and he felt sorrow at losing his father again so soon. “Father.”

“Thank you for forgiving me Kakashi. Now I can move on in peace.”

Kakashi’s eyes closed against the sudden pain that enveloped him, his father’s voice following back into the dark. “I’ll finally be able to see your mother.”

I’m coming Sakura.

XX

Despite Sakura’s best efforts, people were dying around her and she wasn’t saving enough of them. Everything was in chaos and she had no idea where Shizune, Kakashi or anyone else was. Lady Katsuya enveloped her just as the town seemed to collapse and be swept away around her, until nothing of the village remained standing.

It was in the middle of this that a sharp pain lanced in her back and Sakura fell to her knees in shock. She cried out as her heart seemed to stop for a moment, her breath catching at the searing pain. Kakashi! She could feel her back pulsing and she thought of Kurenai-sensei’s mark changing after Asuma-sensei’s death. Despair threatened to overwhelm her, her eyes squeezing shut to contain the tears that had started to fall. It couldn’t be. He wouldn’t leave her now. For a moment the world went black, her vision darkening and her throat tightening against the sobs that tried to escape her lips.

“Naruto…hurry!” A cry was ripped from Sakura’s throat as she thought of Kakashi’s lifeless body somewhere in this rubble. “Please, Naruto!” Please bring him back.

It was then that he appeared as if in answer to her pleas, riding on the shoulder of Gamabunta in his sage robes, deep in the crater that was once Konoha. Sakura felt her heart fill with hope despite the blinding pain. Naruto was here, and only he could save them.

XX

Hinata had never considered herself brave or strong. Yet she’d been watching Naruto from a young age, inspired by the confidence and determination he held onto so tightly despite everyone treating him like he was worthless. She’d looked at the boy he was and knew that above everything, she wanted to be like him. But she’d been a coward, too afraid to go against her clan’s wishes and befriend Naruto. Too afraid to upset her father further when she should have taken Naruto’s hand from the first moment and clung on tight no matter who tried to pull them apart.

It still amazed Hinata that someone as strong and brave and so very worthy as Naruto could be her soulmate. She did not deserve to stand beside him yet, and perhaps she never would, but she would continue chasing him, honing her abilities and training until she’d attained the respect of her family and would finally be noticed by Naruto. His eyes were focused on Sakura, his heart set on a woman who could not love him, but Hinata was determined to show him that she would love him more and she would never be ashamed of him. It was her hope that Naruto would finally see her and realize that he could care for her. She could not hope to gain his heart, as he seemed to give a piece of it to every friend he made, supporting them when they needed him most. She hoped that she could gain his affection at the very least and maybe one day he would look at her and realize that she could make him happy and give him the family he’d always yearned for.

In his battle with Pein, Hinata watched Naruto as she always had, worried for his safety even as she admired how strong he’d become in his absence. He was always getting stronger, always achieving some new level of ability every time Hinata saw him. For awhile it seemed that he had the upper hand with so many standing beside him and supporting him. But slowly the battle took a turn for the worse and Naruto was weakening under Pein’s constant onslaught. Hinata watched in fear as Naruto was struck down and pinned in place cruelly. His pain was her own, and she clenched her fists as each blade was driven into his body to hold him in place. She couldn’t let this happen to him. She wasn’t ready, could never be ready to face someone as strong as Pein, but she couldn’t watch Naruto be defeated. She was jumping to defend him before anyone realized what was happening.

XX

Naruto was tired. Training, he was always training and there always seemed to be someone new that was trying to destroy Konoha and everyone he held dear. This time they’d succeeded in leveling the village and stealing one of his most precious people, Kakashi-sensei. He wanted to grieve, to cry for the man that had taught him so much and cared for him so deeply. But he had to focus on Pein and the fight for the surviving citizens of Konoha. Despite what he needed to do, he couldn’t help remembering Kakashi ruffling his hair and smiling at him with his familiar eye-crease. His sensei was dead, and it felt like too much after the death of Jiraiya as well. Slowly the people he considered family were being ripped from him and he was helpless to stop it.

When Pein finally had him pinned to the ground, taunting him for his dream of peace that Jiraiya had passed on to him, Naruto was close to giving up. Wasn’t Pein right? The harder he worked for peace, the more people seemed to oppose him, the more the people he surrounded himself with died. Could Pein really be the answer? As Pein moved to strike him down and complete his vision of peace, Naruto felt the sudden presence of Hinata as she intercepted Pein.

He watched with dismay as she was thrown around like a ragdoll, not able to do anything against Pein’s power. Anger built in his chest every time Hinata hit the ground. He begged her to leave but she wouldn’t listen and he despaired as she repeated his own Nindo to him, determined despite the blood that trickled from her mouth, despite the shaking of her limbs and the visible pain etched in the determined grimace on her face. He’d always considered Hinata weird, but in that moment he realized she was beautiful and strong in her own way. His soulmark seemed to burn with every hit Hinata took and Naruto felt his anger threatening his control on the Nine-tails as Pein threw Hinata away from him again and again. Naruto’s eyes met hers for a final time, and she managed a smile just for him before she was thrown for the last time. Naruto watched with horror as Pein impaled Hinata with one of his blades. The burn of his mark seemed to spread throughout his entire body, and his vision went red as Hinata gasped and fell still.

“Hinata!”

I love you Naruto.

XX

Naruto’s fight with Pein seemed to last an eternity to Sakura, but she focused on finding Hinata who’d run off so recklessly and healing her. Tears fell from her cheeks when she finally found her friend’s prone body. Had she lost another friend? She dropped to her knees and searched for Hinata’s pulse, sighing with relief. It was weak, but it was there.

“Oh Hinata. What were you thinking?” she chided her as she worked on healing her. “I know you love Naruto but to go this far?” Her voice quieted as she considered it. Wouldn’t she do the same for Kakashi? If there had been any chance to save him, wouldn’t she have jumped in just as recklessly? Sakura sighed and hoped for the best for Naruto and Hinata.

It was only when Fukasaku’s eyes shot open and he gasped that Sakura realized that Naruto had succeeded in his fight against Pein. She focused on healing those around her and ignored the rejoicing and hugging that surrounded her. She couldn’t get her hopes up. Not when her heart still ached, and fear was still sitting heavily on her shoulders.

XX

Kakashi wanted to find Sakura the moment he awoke. He comforted a crying Choji and stood weakly to his feet. He took off as soon as his legs could hold his weight. The urge to run straight to Sakura was overwhelming but he caught Naruto’s scent in the wind and switched directions.

He came across Naruto just in time as he fell forwards with exhaustion, catching him against his back. “Rest Naruto. You deserve it.” Kakashi insisted, hauling Naruto onto his back as if he was a child.

“Kakashi-sensei,” Naruto cried weakly, “I’m so happy you’re alive.”

Kakashi soothed him with soft croons as Naruto buried his face in Kakashi’s shoulder and cried. “It’s okay Naruto. Everyone is okay. You did good.”

Kakashi carried Naruto towards their decimated village, voices growing louder as they walked. They cleared the trees and the sight of hundreds of people greeted them. Kakashi’s eyes focused on Sakura’s tear-stained face, heart aching at her swollen eyes. He set Naruto down carefully and watched with pride as the village cheered for the Hero of Konoha. He could tell that Naruto didn’t know how to deal with the sudden and overwhelming admiration of the villagers and shinobi but Sakura had gained his full attention as she ran towards them. Naruto’s eyes brightened as he spotted her and then widened in surprise as she surpassed him entirely and threw herself into Kakashi’s arms. Kakashi fell backwards, using his chakra to slow his momentum as he fell on his ass.

“Kakashi,” Sakura wept against his neck as her arms wrapped around his neck. “You came back.”

Kakashi wrapped one arm around Sakura’s waist and stroked her hair with his free hand, clutching her to him just as desperately. “Of course, I did.” He pressed a kiss to the side of her head and breathed her in. He thought he’d never get to do this again and he didn’t care what anyone thought.

Her face pressed into curve of his neck, tears seeping into the fabric of his mask as she cried in delayed grief and aching relief that he was alive. He didn’t know how long they sat there, Sakura’s face hidden against his shoulder as she sobbed, and his lips pressed to her hair as he murmured words of reassurance only she could hear. The only word she could offer in return was his name repeated until her cries quieted.

It wasn’t until she fell silent that Kakashi took notice of their position. He was sitting on the ground, legs stretched in front of his and an arm banded around her back. She was sitting with her knees splayed to either side of his hips, fingers buried in his hair. His lips were still pressed into her hair, her own mouth pressed against his neck with parted lips, her breath dampening his mask as well as her tears. 

Naruto pulled away from the villagers and approached them hesitantly, confused at the picture they made.

“Oi, what are you doing to Sakura, Kakashi-sensei?” Naruto demanded.

Sakura’s face heated and her arms dropped from around Kakashi. Kakashi helped her to her feet and stood up stiffly as well, greeting Naruto as if he and Sakura hadn’t just been clinging to each other.

“Ah, Naruto. I want to thank you for reviving me,” Kakashi said with a bow of his head. “Death was not an experience I was ready for it seems.” At Sakura’s stifled gasp of grief Kakashi wrapped his arm around her shoulder on the pretense that he needed support. Sakura caught on quickly and urged him to lean on her.

Naruto squinted suspiciously between the two of them but his joy at successfully beating Pein and reviving Kakashi overwhelmed his momentary suspicion. He hugged Kakashi awkwardly, wrapping his arm around Sakura’s.

“I’m glad you’re okay Kakashi-sensei.”

The three of them stood there together, wrapped around each other and taking comfort quietly. Naruto figured he understood why Sakura was in Kakashi’s arms. He’d died and it must have been just as hard for her as it had been for Naruto. They were family and it felt nice to be with his family.

XX

Hinata watched Naruto hugging Sakura and Kakashi with a sad smile. She’d seen Sakura jump into Kakashi’s arms but everyone else was occupied with Naruto’s return and the fallen shinobi. It wasn’t particularly damning as Naruto eventually made his way to them and joined their huddle, but Hinata was happy for them. She stared at Naruto wistfully. Despite everything she’d said, it seemed like Naruto hadn’t processed a single word. He’d greeted her with a happy smile and a warm hug, pleased to see her alive and well but he’d made no mention of her declaration of love for him. His attention was easily captured by someone else and Hinata faded in the background as she always did, watching Naruto’s success with pride and joy at every accomplishment but always a step behind.

Hinata watched the joyful reunions that surrounded her, smiling as Shizune was picked up by Genma and swung around. She averted her eyes politely as Genma pulled her in for a passionate kiss. Ayame burst to the front of the crowd, her eyes wild as she searched for Lee. Lee was quick to spot her and rushed to her side, pulling her close in an exuberant embrace. Hinata’s eyes widened in disbelief as Tenten seemed to notice the amount of people kissing around her and turned to Neji who was standing contentedly by her side and yanked his head down for a kiss. Hinata giggled as Neji’s face reddened but he made no objection to the kiss.

Her eyes returned with longing to Naruto who was talking animatedly with Sakura and Kakashi-sensei. What was it that Kakashi-sensei said to her about Sakura? She smiled as it came to her. As long as Naruto was happy, Hinata could never be sad.

Chapter Text

After dying and meeting his father again, Kakashi had been thinking heavily of what he wanted in life. Sakura was number one on that list and he’d confidently told Gai that, only to be shaken by Gai’s mild censure.

“She is your soulmate,” Gai agreed. “And she’s an adult. But that doesn’t mean you need to rush into things Kakashi.”

“Rush into things?” Kakashi had questioned with a disbelieving laugh. “I’ve been waiting for this moment for five years.”

“And so has she,” Gai commented. “But Sakura’s still young. How can she be sure of what she truly wants?” he questioned sadly. “All she’s known is that she belongs to you, and you’ve spent years reinforcing that idea in her head.”

“No,” Kakashi denied. “I’ve told you, Gai. I’ve tried to stay away. I’ve tried to let her live her own life. It’s not what either of us wants. It hurts.”

“And it should,” Gai said severely. “You’ve always had the most self-control of any shinobi I’ve met, until now.” He sighed at Kakashi’s confusion. “Have I ever told you that I have a soulmark? I couldn’t believe when it appeared” Gai told Kakashi, knowing full well that he hadn’t. “She’s as young as Sakura. I didn’t realize as early as you did.” Gai acknowledged. “How could I? She was a child and Lee needed my support more than the other two. Neji was moving ahead in strides, and Tenten was so determined to make it on her own.”

“Tenten?” Kakashi questioned, surprised.

“She doesn’t know.” Gai said grimly. “And I don’t know if she’ll ever realize. We’ve never had that kind of relationship and,” he gestured at his full-length leotard with self-effacement.  “I never had the mysterious appeal that you have. She and Neji are dating and they have been since Pein. Neji has no soulmark, as most of the Hyuga don’t and Tenten doesn’t care to find the person that matches hers, namely me. And I’m happy about that,” Gai asserted. “She’s so very youthful and she doesn’t need to be held back by her old sensei.”

“I tried to tell Sakura that,” Kakashi protested weakly.

“I know,” Gai comforted him. “I watched you struggle with this for years and I didn’t understand what created such turmoil. It was the night Asuma and I had to carry you home?” He’d never before intoxicated himself to the point that he was incapable of finding his way home or even standing on his own feet.

“How did you-?”

“You cried,” Gai admitted. “And you kept asking your father and mother what to do. We were worried, but you never mentioned what was wrong and we respected your privacy.” Gai frowned. “What I don’t understand is why you didn’t ask The Third to take Sakura from your team, or Tsunade later? Maybe at first it was understandable, but after your feelings for Sakura changed?” Gai shook his head.

“I should have,” Kakashi admitted. “I lied to myself, told myself that The Third would completely take the team away. And I didn’t want to lose the chance I had to get to know Minato’s son, and to try and help Itachi’s brother. But more than that, I was curious about Sakura, and from the first moment I felt the connection that my father spoke of so long ago, the need to protect what was mine. And how could I protect her when she was on another team and her safety was out of my control? And then it got easier because Tsunade was training her and I saw her less and less. Even after Team Kakashi was formed, I was often on separate missions after Asuma’s death. I convinced myself it no longer mattered.”

“I’m not saying never Kakashi,” Gai said in an uncharacteristically soft voice. “But how can she make a decision this permanent when she has no other choices? Even if returning to you is an eventuality, she needs to realize that you’re not the only man in Konoha. To discover what she wants from a relationship beyond what you need. She’s too malleable, too kind-hearted not to give you everything of herself. And that’s dangerous for her. I’m not saying you would hurt her intentionally Kakashi. But your list of relationships that have lasted beyond a night is empty. You’ve always run from any intimacy, Kakashi. I hardly know you, and I’m your best friend.”

Sakura knows me, he wanted to say but that was hardly the point. “I thought you were okay with this?” Kakashi questioned bitterly, referring to when Gai found Sakura sleeping in his hospital room.

Gai’s expression clouded with guilt. “I thought I was. You looked so at ease, Kakashi. After so many years of you shouldering the burden of your past, you looked the closest to serene as I’d ever seen you. I was happy for you and I still am. You are my best friend,” Gai said firmly. “But I care for Sakura as well. And it is our duty to ensure our students live to become capable shinobi. It is our duty to shape them so that we can let them go when they are grown. I don’t know the details of your relationship, but our life will never be easy. And I don’t want Sakura’s life to be any more difficult than it already is.”

Kakashi nodded in agreement. It was as he’d feared. He was too broken, too jaded for Sakura. He trusted Gai’s assessment more than anyone else’s. It completely crushed the optimism he’d begun to feel about the reactions of their teammates and Tsunade when she eventually awoke. But how could he explain it to Sakura without making it seem like he was completely rejecting her? How could he make her understand that she needed to focus on more than him? He dreaded the conversation they needed to have and put it off for as long as possible.

XX

Tsunade was in a coma and the village was left in turmoil despite Naruto saving Konoha. The people of Konoha were looking for leadership and Naruto was not ready despite earning Konoha’s respect. Sakura turned seventeen right in the middle of the clean-up of the town. Her parents baked her a cake the week before but the day of was filled with helping repair and rebuild what they could. She worked closely with Kakashi and Naruto, always making sure to keep Kakashi within her sight. The feeling of his loss was still fresh and lingered in her nightmares. She often woke up crying his name as she witnessed his death and Naruto wasn’t there to bring him back. She never woke right away, always forced to go on seemingly for days without him. The desolation she felt in these dreams threatened to swallow her whole. And despite what she felt and how desperately she needed Kakashi’s presence, he was keeping himself at a distance and it confused her.

She understood that he might be reticent about revealing their connection, but she couldn’t comprehend why he seemed determined to push her away. There wasn’t time to rejoice that she was now considered an adult and stood to be promoted to Jounin. And even if Kakashi and she were on the same page, it didn’t seem like the best time to announce to the village that she and Kakashi would be together. It seemed disrespectful when she considered what had happened to Konoha and Tsunade. And maybe Kakashi felt the same, but he was remaining silent on the issue, keeping their conversations light or speaking only of missions. Danzo had himself declared the Hokage in a coup that surprised no one but troubled Team Kakashi as he instantly declared Sasuke a traitor to Konoha. She got it, they had more important issues to concern themselves with then their soulmarks but his sudden indifference hurt her. She felt he didn’t trust her when he refused to explain why he was treating her as he had when they were the original Team 7.

Even Naruto was noticing the change, scratching his head in confusion as Sakura was left staring after Kakashi with sad eyes multiple times as their sensei poofed away.

“What’s Kakashi-sensei’s problem, Sakura?” He glared at the spot that Kakashi had stood a second before. “Did you two have a fight or something?”

“Or something,” Sakura murmured with a weak smile. “It’s nothing Naruto. We’re just stressed with Danzo in charge and you know how Kakashi is.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Naruto agreed uncertainly.

Sakura said her goodbyes and promised to see Naruto the next day for their next mission. Naruto watched her disappear into the crowd with a frown. It wasn’t until later that he realized that Sakura had dropped the honorific at the end of Kakashi’s name.

XX

Hinata was very busy. She was going to be 17 soon and that meant a multitude of additional responsibilities as the Hyuga heiress. After her reckless display with Naruto, her father had reprimanded her severely for risking her life so recklessly. Naruto had won his respect, but his daughter’s actions could not be praised in light of how close to death she’d come. He did not tell her he was proud of her, but after he’d finished admonishing her, Hiashi rested his hand on Hinata’s shoulder and told her that her training as heiress would commence immediately.

“We need someone strong to lead the Hyuga.” Hiashi stated solemnly.

“But Hanabi?” Hinata worried.

“Has made it clear she has no desire to lead the Hyuga clan and insists that you are the heir.” Hiashi didn’t seem disgruntled at the news, merely shaking his head at Hanabi’s stubborn nature. “The elders have no objection,” Hiashi hesitated but nodded once, “And neither do I. The details of the line of succession have never been discussed beyond the walls of our compound. As far as the rest of Konoha is concerned, you have always remained the heir. And I ensured that no one disabused them of that belief.”

“Father,” Hinata blinked back tears, straightening her posture and meeting her father’s eyes with an unyielding expression. “I won’t let you down.”

Hiashi’s expression softened at Hinata’s determination. He squeezed her shoulder gently. “I have no doubt, Hinata.”

As soon as her father left the room, Hinata collapsed to her knees, hands shaking as she considered what this meant. As heir to the clan head, there were certain expectations of her. She’d thought that the distinction had been passed onto Hanabi’s shoulders and it had been a relief as much as it had disgraced her to be overlooked in favor of her younger sister. She’d been raised from infancy to understand her responsibilities and her father tried to shape her to be strong, but the training hadn’t stuck as her father had wanted. Hinata had been too soft, too weak to lead their clan. And she’d accepted that fact at 12 years old when 7-year-old Hanabi had defeated her. It had hurt to see her father’s disapproval and his disappointment. She would have given anything to be more than she was, to be faster, stronger and simply better in every way. And now her father had given her the second chance she’d never expected and it filled her with equal parts joy and sorrow. The Hyuga clan didn’t put much stock in soulmarks. They considered them a primitive reminder of a chaotic past. Neither of her parents had a soulmark, and over time less and less Hyuga seemed to manifest them. She and Hanabi were the first Hyuga to have soulmarks in over two generations and her father wasn’t happy about it. She would be expected to marry to further Hyuga ties and not necessarily someone of her generation. The orphaned son that contained the Nine-tailed fox would never be seen as a suitable match no matter how powerful he was.

Naruto found her at the training grounds behind her clan’s compound, sitting against the trunk of a wide tree. “Hey Hinata!” Hinata looked up startled. He grinned apologetically as Hinata’s face suffused with color. “Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you, but I was looking all over for you! Hanabi said you’d be here.”

“Y-you were looking for me, Naruto?”

“Yes!” Naruto confirmed eagerly, but then he scratched his head nervously as he considered what he wanted to talk to her about.

Hinata’s heart stuttered as Naruto hesitated. Had Sakura told him about their soulmarks? Her fingers twisted in her lap and she ducked her head as she waited for Naruto to speak.

“Uh, you and Sakura are pretty good friends, right?” Naruto continued.

Hinata’s stomach twisted painfully. Of course, this was about Sakura. “I would consider us good friends, Naruto.”

“Oh, that’s good!” Naruto began. “Maybe you know what’s going on between her and Kakashi-sensei!”

Hinata’s jaw dropped and she scrambled to think of what to say. “Sakura and Kakashi-sensei?” Hinata questioned nervously. “Why would you ask that?”

Naruto scowled. “They’re not getting along, at all. And Sakura was so disrespectful to Kakashi-sensei today! She called him Kakashi, without the honorific!” Naruto’s eyes were comically wide as he expressed how scandalized he was, but Hinata was distracted by how loud he was yelling.

Hinata glanced around, using her Byakugan to scan if anyone was nearby. She sighed in relief when she saw no one close enough to overhear Naruto’s loud exclamation. It was clear he’d misunderstood the situation and while Hinata often despaired at his oblivious nature, she was extremely happy for it right now.

“They might be fighting, Naruto,” Hinata said softly. “But it isn’t your place to step in right now, unless they ask for your help.”

Naruto’s expression fell and he kicked the dirt sadly. “But they’re my family Hinata. And I don’t want them to hate each other.”

Hinata’s heart filled with tenderness at Naruto’s concern. “Oh Naruto. They could never hate each other. Everyone’s family fights, it’s natural.”

“Even yours?” Naruto said skeptically, thinking of how poised the Hyuga clan was, always presenting a calm facade to the outside world. He couldn’t imagine Hinata being as cold as the elders of her clan. She was so warm in comparison.

“Especially mine,” Hinata confirmed with a smile. “I wouldn’t worry about it too much Naruto. Sakura and Kakashi-sensei love each other,” Hinata’s eyes widened at the admission, “Just as they love you!”

“Thanks, Hinata!” Naruto sighed in relief. “I was really starting to worry about them. I know it’s hard on them with Sasuke still missing and after the whole thing with Pein.” Naruto’s eyes brightened. “And I forgot to thank you Hinata!” He leaned down and grabbed her hand, squeezing reflexively at the sharp jolt that ran through his arm when his fingers met hers. He pulled her into a hug, not minding when Hinata froze in his arms. “You stood up for me when I needed it most. Thank you Hinata!”

“It w-was no p-problem,” Hinata managed, her entire body flooding with warmth at Naruto’s closeness. Don’t faint, don’t faint, don’t faint she chanted in her head as Naruto squeezed her tightly.

Naruto pulled away and looked down at her with an affectionate smile. “You know, I love you too Hinata.” Naruto watched with interest as her pale lavender eyes widened and her red face drained of color. Her eyes were beautiful, now that he could see them up close. Her skin looked so soft. Why hadn’t he ever noticed how dark Hinata’s hair was? It was inky black that glinted blue in the right light and it smelled so nice. He shook his head at the weird thoughts when Hinata responded.

“W-what did you say?” Hinata looked close to fainting as she tended to do in his presence.

Naruto’s arm wound around her waist to support her and he frowned in concern. “Are you okay, Hinata?” At Hinata’s weak nod, he smiled. “Obviously, I love you,” he announced. “How could I not? You stood behind me when everyone else was too afraid! I need more friends like you Hinata! I know I told everyone to stay away and let me handle it,” Naruto grumbled good-naturedly, “But I’m happy that you helped me. I really needed it.”

Hinata had been over the moon with Naruto’s careless declaration, said so confidently. Could he really love her? Her and not Sakura? But as he mentioned the word friend, Hinata’s heart was crushed. Of course, he meant he loved her like a friend. Hadn’t she realized that Naruto cared so deeply for all the people he considered friends? “Yes, I’m so happy we’re…friends.” Hinata murmured softly. For the first time she was able to look Naruto in the eyes. And he looked so pleased by her comment, his lips stretched wide in the smile she’d fallen so in love with. She reached up and stroked the whisker marks across his cheeks, just as she’d always wanted to but never dared. They were like scars across his face, the skin slightly raised and of a different texture than the rest of his cheeks. Soft and heated against the pads of her fingers. Hinata was so concentrated on her fingers stroking his cheek that she missed the red that had seeped into Naruto’s eyes.

Naruto was focused intently on the unfamiliar touch. No one had ever touched the marks adorning his face purposely before and it was a startling sensation. His skin felt as if it was burning under the cool caress of Hinata’s fingers and he gulped heavily. “Uhhh,” he’d never been in this situation with a girl so close to him and by her own free will. He’d dreamed of Sakura before, of soft kisses and affectionate embraces but he’d never been so very warm before, his throat suddenly tight and breathing becoming increasingly difficult.

Hinata seemed to realize that she was causing him distress and she stepped back, smiling sadly. “I’m sorry Naruto.”

“It’s okay, Hinata!” Naruto was quick to reassure her. “I just wasn’t expecting…that?” He didn’t know why but he was lost for words, nervous around Hinata in a way he’d never been before. His gaze skittered away from her face, sliding down and landing awkwardly on the swell of her breasts. Had Hinata always been so well-endowed? He blushed and he quickly looked back at her face. Hinata was watching him curiously.

“Are you feeling well?” she inquired softly. Naruto had an embarrassing reaction to her concern, noticing that her voice was so high and musical. Coupled with the other things he was just noticing, he felt the need to turn away, hunching over awkwardly.

“Maybe I don’t feel well.” He mumbled. “I’ll see you later, Hinata. Thanks for the help!”

Hinata watched Naruto leave with confusion and worry. She hoped he was feeling okay. She sighed as she considered their conversation. It really shouldn’t bother her that much. She’d always realized that Naruto didn’t really notice her. She should simply be happy that he considered her a friend that he loved, even if it was platonically. It was more than she had before and it no longer mattered anyway. Her father had also informed her that she was to start accepting suitors. She would be an adult soon and with the war looming over their heads, he said that the Hyuga clan needed stability now more than ever. Stability and the joy a marriage would bring. Still, she looked at her fingers that were still tingling from the feel of Naruto’s skin. Touching him had been pure enjoyment, settling her nerves for the first time in his presence. Hinata could understand what Sakura had meant. Naruto was her home, but Hinata also understood that they didn’t feel the same way but that was now proving to be a good thing. She hoped that Naruto found someone that would love him as unconditionally as she had. It was time to let him go.

Meanwhile Naruto was sprinting home, his mind racing as he tried to make sense of what just happened. Hinata was his friend but she was also a girl. Not a girl he realized with dawning horror. She was a woman and he hadn’t even noticed. When had that happened? Naruto was sixteen and eagerly awaiting when he would become an adult like Sakura. It was summer and he only had a few months remaining. He thought back to what he knew of Hinata. She was one of the youngest in the class, younger than him by at least a couple months. She was still sixteen too but soon she would be an adult. And maybe she was excited like he was. His eyes had always been on Sakura and he’d somehow missed how beautiful Hinata was like an idiot. Did she have a boyfriend? Did he care? Yes, he decided. He skidded to a stop in the middle of the street as he realized. Yes, he cared if Hinata had a boyfriend. Because he liked Hinata and he wanted to date her! What about Sakura, his stupid brain reminded him. But that was a passing thought. He’d come to terms with how he felt for Sakura. She was family, an overbearing older sister that he adored. Naruto couldn’t pin down the exact moment his feelings had started to shift from hopelessly devoted to loving, - but platonic – affection. It was a good thing in the long run. Sakura clearly would never love him because…because…a light bulb went off in his head and he gasped audibly in shock. He thought back to the looks Kakashi-sensei and Sakura had shared over the years, the affection and concern Sakura showed their sensei more than anyone else and how very cold Kakashi-sensei had been to Sakura when she was younger. He puzzled it over in his head, brain straining to make connections. Kakashi-sensei wouldn’t have taken advantage of Sakura, would he? But Naruto rejected that thought as well. Their sensei was a good man above anything and cared deeply for his teammates. But what did that mean? What did that mean? He turned around and headed towards Sakura’s apartment as he considered it. He laughed as he realized that Sakura lived right next door to their sensei. That couldn’t be a coincidence, could it?

XX

Sakura needed to talk to Kakashi and she was tired of waiting for him to stop avoiding her. She went to his apartment on a day where he had no missions, checking first at the cenotaph to make sure he wasn’t there. He answered the door with a wary expression but merely stepped aside when she asked to come in.

Sakura didn’t waste words under his scrutinizing gaze. She took a deep breath and turned her back to him, slipping her shirt off as she turned. His strangled gasp was all the confirmation she needed. She didn’t expect the feel of calloused fingers pressing carefully between her shoulder blades but the shock once his skin touched hers was unmistakeable.  A jolt of desire, love and familiarity coursing through her veins, radiating from the point where his fingers stroked her skin reverently.

“I tried,” Kakashi whispered. “I know we discussed it, but I’m having a hard time with this Sakura.”

Sakura turned at his confession, searching his eye as she tried to understand. “Why Kakashi?”

“You’re so young,” he offered.

“No,” Sakura asserted, the first flames of anger colouring her tone. “You don’t get to decide that.” Her fists clenched. “You promised to wait for me, but it goes both ways Kakashi. I was waiting for you too.” She searched his closed expression. “I thought we were past this Kakashi.”

Sakura’s arms folded protectively over her chest and she realized that she was still shirtless, her breasts unbound to show Kakashi her mark. Kakashi was doing his best but his eyes strayed to her chest more than once.

Kakashi closed his eyes tightly, his fists clenching at his sides. He avoided her question for the moment, hoping to make a point. “Is this what you want Sakura?” His hands moved to her shoulders, her own arms dropping in surprise as he pulled her close, his forehead pressing against her shoulder. She shivered, his soft hair tickling her skin as he lifted his face; forehead then cheek sliding across her shoulder slowly. His mouth pressed against her shoulder, one hand slipping into the back of her skirt, the other stroking her side. “Do you know how sick I am? I wanted you even at fifteen years old.”

Sakura was speechless as fire ignited in her blood. Her head tilted automatically as he pressed open-mouthed kisses to her shoulder, moving to her neck as he carefully nipped her with his canines. He could feel her nipples pebbling against the fabric of his undershirt, could smell her arousal and he was disgusted with himself but so very pleased to be able to finally touch her as much as he wanted after so long. His fingers slipped between her legs, finding her already wet. He growled against her neck, his hand leaving her side and moving to cup her small breast as she cried out.

“Kakashi?” Sakura wasn’t sure what to do. Her body was so eager for his touch. She’d imagined this scenario on several occasions, but she’d never imagined that she could feel so much as his fingers stroked between her legs and rolled her nipples. A rational part of her knew that this wasn’t a good idea despite the intimacy they’d shared previously. Not when their issues didn’t seem to be resolved. How could she make love to him, when he didn’t even know what he wanted from her? She squirmed at the phrase “make love” but how else could she describe it? It wasn’t just sex, it couldn’t be.

At the hesitance in her voice, Kakashi froze. He sighed against her neck as he pulled away, turning away from her in shame and clenching his fists so he wouldn’t reach for her. “Put on your shirt Sakura.”

“I…Kakashi I didn’t mean…” Sakura stopped talking and tried to focus past her body’s demands. Dutifully she pulled on her shirt and smoothed out the wrinkles as she waited for Kakashi to speak.

“I’m sorry Sakura, but now you can understand why it was best that I stayed away. When I say you are too young, I don’t mean to placate you or use it as an excuse. I want more from you then you can understand.” Kakashi turned back to her once he was certain she was dressed. “You’re my soulmate, but I never wanted one. I never needed one.”

At her fallen expression he sighed. “I never wanted one, until you smashed the ground open in front of my face. And I know that whatever is said about soulmates being meant for each other, I was still wrong to want you Sakura and wrong to exploit our bond. You’re seventeen and I’m thirty-one. I deluded myself into thinking it would be alright.”

Sakura tilted her chin defiantly. “I don’t care. I don’t care what people say, what they think. I’ve been in love with you for almost as long as I’ve known you.” As he opened his mouth to protest, she raised her hand to silence him. “You’re my soulmate but you forget that while I might be young I’ve lost so much already, and I know what it’s like to lose you. You can’t say that. You can’t know how much it hurt the moment you died. I felt it, Kakashi. I was fighting and then…” Sakura’s fist pressed against her mouth as she remembered the moment. “And then you were gone. And I knew it, but I couldn’t do anything. I was useless because for those seconds I could only focus on the pain of your loss.” It felt like her world was ending. “I’ve lost friends, felt heartache and killed people. I’m not a child and I know what I want.”

“And what about Naruto? What about Tsunade? How can your parents understand? Can you face them with the same confidence?” Kakashi challenged her. “Can you live with the consequences of declaring your feelings?”

Sakura wavered, thinking of Naruto’s hurt, of her parent’s anger. Would they understand? Tsunade might, having experienced the loss of her own soulmate. But her parents wouldn’t, not when they’d rejected the idea of soulmates altogether. Naruto might not, never having felt what she has, not able to understand the bond that she shared with Kakashi despite their previous strife. But she’d already dealt with these exact questions from Hinata she reminded herself and she’d made her decision then.  She squared her shoulders as Kakashi looked at her with such sad certainty. “Yes, I can. I told you that I don’t care. My parents can disown me, Naruto can be as angry as he wants. I’m not letting you just walk away again.”

Kakashi watched her with conflicted emotions. She seemed so certain of what she wanted. She was of legal age but that didn’t mean that people wouldn’t still look down on them because of the age difference. People already thought he was a pervert. How would they react if they heard he was practically a cradle robber? But he’d waited so long, had settled into the idea that she was his and accepted that even if she married someone else, he would remain hers until he died. His father once told him that Hatakes had always loved fiercely and loyally until the day they died. Maybe it was the traits they shared with the ninkens that they commanded, but he’d chosen his mate and it was set in stone as far as he was concerned. Sakura was it for him. There could be no one else.

“I need time,” he admitted finally. “And so do you. You’re shaken up by my death, and of course your first instinct is to cling to me. I understand that better than anyone, but I want you to be certain. I need you to understand that just because our soulmarks match, this doesn’t mean that I’m your only choice.”

Sakura laughed bitterly. “But you are! You have been since I was 12 years old. Is that what this is about? I’m not a child Kakashi and you could put a hundred different men in front of me, more handsome, more intelligent, stronger, younger, it wouldn’t matter. You’re it.” As Kakashi opened his mouth to respond Sakura held her hand up. “I understand that you’re still battling misplaced guilt. I don’t know why this issue has resurfaced again but it’s clear that you need to think about what you want. I don’t need you to tell me what I should feel or think. I’m not the one that’s confused.” Sakura swallowed hard and nodded once. “I can’t make you want a relationship with me, Kakashi. Just please don’t shut me out again.”

Kakashi nodded. He wanted to tell her to forget what he’d said, to forgive him for his indecision but he couldn’t. He stepped towards her, his fingers caressing her cheek with restrained tenderness. “Thank you. And please think about what I said. I’ll see you soon Sakura.” He guided her to his door with a gentle hand on the small of her back. He closed the door on her defeated expression with a sigh.

If only they’d met later in life. Another five years would have been okay, when the age difference didn’t matter as much and when she’d lived a little more of her life and seen what else the world had to offer her besides him. She was so certain of what she wanted and the temptation to give in to her and forget Gai’s words was strong, but he resisted. They both needed time to think it over. He’d focused so long on Sakura that he was in danger of letting her consume him. Gai had put it in perspective for him.

XX

Naruto skid to a stop in front of Kakashi’s apartment complex and smiled in triumph as he spotted Sakura trudging down the stairs towards the street.

“Hey, Sakuuuura!” Naruto started waving his arms wildly as Sakura looked towards him. He watched in consternation as she tried to smile for him but her expression was pinched and tears slid down her cheeks. “Oi, what did Kakashi-sensei do to you?” Naruto huffed in aggravation. Their sensei was really starting to get on his nerves making Sakura so sad.

“Nothing, Naruto. He didn’t do anything,” Sakura said quietly as she turned and led the way to her own apartment.

Naruto followed her dutifully, but his brow was furrowed in frustration. He hardly noticed when Sakura led him into her apartment and shut the door quietly behind him. “I don’t understand why Kakashi-sensei is making you so sad. Soulmates are supposed to make you happy!”

Sakura froze in place with her back to him, the kettle she’d filled with water to heat for tea held in the air above the stovetop. “What did you say, Naruto?”

Naruto repeated himself clearly, wondering if Sakura’s hearing was starting to go or something. “I said, soulmates are supposed to make you happy! Kakashi-sensei isn’t doing a very good job, is he?”

Sakura placed the kettle down heavily, turning to Naruto with wide eyes. “How long have you known that Kakashi and I are soulmates?”

Naruto scratched his head, thinking back to when he’d been talking to Hinata. He was momentarily distracted by the thought of Hinata’s lavender eyes and her breasts and her long hair and her smile. She really was beautiful. Why hadn’t he ever noticed? He really could be an idiot sometimes.

“Naruto!” Sakura said sharply.

“Oh!” Naruto’s eyes squinted in concentration. “Uh, I would guess I’ve known about fifteen minutes.” He nodded in satisfaction at his own deduction. “And let me tell you Sakura, I should have realized before! You two have been acting weird around each other for years!”

“Fifteen minutes?” Sakura asked with a dazed expression. “Wha-? Wait, that doesn’t matter. Does it bother you?” Sakura asked him nervously.

Naruto considered it and shook his head in denial. “No, I don’t feel that way about you anymore Sakura. And I never liked Kakashi like that.” His nose wrinkled in disgust.

Sakura rolled her eyes at his self-absorbed answer. “That’s great Naruto, but I mean do you see anything wrong with our relationship?”

Naruto scratched his head in confusion again. “Why would I? You’re soulmates. Kakashi’s sensei had a soulmate. Her name was Kushina and she was really great about him being Hokage. Kakashi said that she loved his sensei more than anything and they were very happy.” Naruto smiled sadly. “I guess that was my mom since The Fourth was my dad. No wonder Kakashi told me so many stories about them. I feel like I already know them.”

“Oh, Naruto.” Sakura pulled him into a hug and he clung to her.

Naruto allowed her to comfort him for a moment, but he pulled away after a few minutes and cleared his throat. “My mom and dad were very happy, and Asuma-sensei and Kurenai-sensei were happy. Lee, Ayame, Shizune, and Genma are happy. I don’t understand why you aren’t? If it’s Kakashi-sensei’s fault, I’ll kick his ass!”

Sakura laughed at his exuberance at fighting Kakashi. “You really don’t mind about us?”

“You keep asking that,” Naruto said with annoyance. “Why would I mind?”

“Because he’s our sensei, and he’s almost fourteen years older than me, and he’s lazy and a pervert and…”

“And you love him.” Naruto stated. “That’s what matters, isn’t it? If anyone has a problem with it, I’ll kick their asses too!” he announced. “It doesn’t matter if you’re soulmates. That’s important too but if you love each other, then that’s all you need.”

Sakura’s eyes filled with tears and she hugged Naruto tightly. “Thank you, Naruto.”

Naruto smiled, pleased that he could help Sakura out. Then his brow furrowed again as he asked her nervously, “Hey, do you know if Hinata is seeing anyone?”

Sakura pulled back from him and wiped her tears away with a wondering expression. “It’s like you’re growing up before my eyes.” She said with awe. “You’re no longer an idiot.” She smirked at his indignant expression and kissed his cheek with affection. “I haven’t talked to her since she’s been out of the hospital, but I could ask her if you want?”

“Please!” Naruto asked with pleading eyes. “But don’t tell her that I wanted to know! I want to ask her out myself and surprise her!”

“I promise,” Sakura said solemnly, already planning on breaking that promise to give some warning to Hinata so she didn’t die of a heart attack.

“Thanks, Sakura!” Naruto grinned. “And don’t worry about Kakashi-sensei! He loves you too! He looks at you like you’re a bowl of ramen! And not just any old ramen, but Ichiraku ramen!”

Sakura rolled her eyes but smiled. “Thanks Naruto. Coming from you, that’s the highest compliment I can receive.”

“You better believe it!”

XX

The village wasn’t built in a day, but progress was swift. It should have thrilled Sakura to see all that they’d accomplished in so short a time, but her heart was aching. She’d kept her distance from Kakashi, much to the annoyance of Naruto. Naruto had taken to throwing Kakashi dirty looks whenever the man glanced towards them. Sakura could only laugh at his attempts to shame Kakashi into a relationship with her, when Kakashi didn’t even understand why Naruto was so pissed at him in the first place. For a usually vocal person, Naruto had sworn himself to secrecy without her asking and was determined to remain on her side throughout.

Sakura loved Naruto even more for the loyalty he displayed without thought, but she didn’t want his relationship with Kakashi to suffer because of her.

“Naruto, I appreciate the support, I really do but Kakashi misses you.”

Naruto glared in the direction of Kakashi, who was working alongside Yamato, but his expression softened when Kakashi sent him a plaintive look in return. Naruto turned his face away abruptly, determined to be angry for her sake. “Then sensei shouldn’t be such an idiot.”

Sakura sighed. “I know you miss him too, Naruto. I love you both too much to see you give him the cold shoulder for my sake. He is still your family and our disagreement shouldn’t affect that.”

“But Saaaakuura,” Naruto whined.

“Invite him for ramen, Naruto.” Sakura said firmly. “Please?”

“Only because you want me to,” Naruto grumbled, but she could see his shoulders sag with relief. He’d never been able to hold a grudge.

Sakura watched in amusement as Naruto marched over to Kakashi, shouting his name as he approached. She could see Kakashi’s uncertainty, then his relief as Naruto spoke to him. He nodded, his eye creasing happily at Naruto’s request. Sakura smiled at them, aching heart forgotten for a moment as Kakashi ruffled Naruto’s hair. He looked up at her and met her eyes deliberately. Thank you, he seemed to say. She shrugged casually, but her heart warmed as his eye held hers with longing, before he dropped his gaze and turned away. This hurts you as much as it hurts me, Kakashi.

XX

Kakashi had no idea why Naruto was giving him the cold shoulder suddenly. One day he was clamouring for more stories of his father and mother, and the next he was avoiding him or glaring at him from afar. It was the day after he rejected Sakura for what felt like the fiftieth time, and Kakashi had a sinking feeling that this was why. What had Sakura admitted to him?

It lifted his spirits when Naruto demanded they go for ramen, and despite the distance between them, Kakashi knew he had Sakura to thank. He couldn’t let himself linger on how beautiful she looked, how sad she was, or how he was the reason for the latter. He’d acquiesced to Naruto’s demand happily and looked forward to a return to their normal relationship.

Kakashi was early for once, sitting at Ichiraku when Naruto approached noisily. He had many new admirers after Pein, women and men alike stopping him at every corner to congratulate him, express gratitude or flirt. He grinned and blushed at the first two, so unused to positive attention, and was completely oblivious to the flirting. Not that Kakashi had minded. He’d long noticed that Hinata had her heart set on Naruto, as had everyone else. Hinata was a sweet girl and Kakashi was rooting for her.

Naruto sat down beside him, ordering quickly for them both before another group swarmed him for his attention. There were so many people and not even one was paying any attention to him, so Kakashi ate his food quickly, grateful to avoid the usual scrutiny Naruto regarded him with whenever they ate together. He was glad that he didn’t have to hide around Sakura anymore and he considered the idea of taking his mask off for Naruto as well. The thought was easily dismissed because teasing Naruto was much more fun.

Naruto did his best to talk to Kakashi but between autographs and eating three bowls of ramen, he wasn’t able to get more than a few words in. “Can we go somewhere quieter?” Naruto finally asked with a frustrated sigh. The smile on his face was becoming strained as he tried to maintain his usual jovial mood.

“Sure,” Kakashi said with an eye crease. “To my apartment?”

Naruto nodded eagerly, slurping up the last of his ramen noisily and stacking the bowl on top of the others he’d finished. “Let’s go sensei!”

Kakashi shook his head at Naruto’s haste, stomach tightening as he wondered what exactly Naruto was going to say to him. What had Sakura told him? He led the way to his apartment silently, setting a fast pace over the rooftops. He entered through the door, still avoiding his bedroom window that faced Sakura’s apartment building. Naruto followed him, his breathing loud as he shut the door quietly. Kakashi avoided looking at him, setting water on for tea.

Naruto laughed behind him and Kakashi froze. “That’s what Sakura did, when she didn’t want to tell me.”

Kakashi sighed. So, she’d told him. But how much? “Tell you what, Naruto?”

“That you’re soulmates,” Naruto said obviously.

“Ahh, I see” Kakashi offered weakly. “She told you.”

“She didn’t have to tell me,” Naruto stated proudly. “I figured it out.”

Kakashi turned to Naruto, searching his face as he continued to speak. Naruto wasn’t one to hide how he felt, and he didn’t keep secrets very well, which worried Kakashi.

“You did?”

Naruto nodded happily, looking to Kakashi for praise or acknowledgment of his deduction abilities. When Kakashi simply stood there and regarded him warily, Naruto frowned in disgruntlement. “Sakura wasn’t impressed either.” He scratched his head. “I know you didn’t want anyone to know. Sakura explained why and it makes sense, but we’re supposed to be a team Kakashi-sensei. You should have trusted me.”

Kakashi sighed at the renewed frustration and vulnerability in Naruto’s eyes and voice. “I’m sorry Naruto. Don’t blame Sakura. I was the one who didn’t want to tell you.”

Naruto huffed in annoyance. “Sakura could have told me anyway. You can’t make her do anything she doesn’t want to, even if you’re her soulmate.”

“Maybe not,” Kakashi admitted, “but we weren’t sure how you would react.”

Naruto looked away from Kakashi with a thoughtful frown on his face. “I might have been angry,” he conceded. “Maybe I would have said something I’d regret later. Maybe I would have kicked your ass. But…” he nodded firmly. “We’re Team Kakashi and nothing you’ve done is any worse than Sasuke. You once said that only scum abandons a comrade, or was it people that are worse than scum abandon friends?” Naruto scratched his head in chagrin. “I got the message and I gave my word. And I never go back on my word! That’s my Nindo.”

Kakashi blinked at Naruto’s easy acceptance, and his unfaltering loyalty. What had he done to deserve this boy in his life? No, as he looked at Naruto’s determined grin, he accepted what he’d been resistant to. Naruto was no longer the hot-headed prankster. He’d saved the village and trained hard to accomplish what he had and become who he was. Naruto was no longer a boy, no longer simply his student and had surpassed him already. For a moment he saw the shadow of his sensei in Naruto’s stance, in his smile and his eyes. Kakashi had no doubt that Naruto would become Hokage one day and surpass his father. But not yet. First, they had to deal with Sasuke. If he could concede that Naruto was an adult, then the same had to be said for Sasuke and Sakura. Sasuke’s actions could no longer be blamed on the misguided anger of youth. And Sakura could no longer be relegated to a girl that wasn’t mature enough to understand what she wanted. The first would be dealt with soon, but the second he still had to give some thought to.

Kakashi reached to ruffle Naruto’s hair, but his hand froze, and he clapped Naruto on the shoulder instead. “Thank you, Naruto. I will always cherish your opinion. I’m sorry that I did not tell you about Sakura before. You deserve honesty at the very least and I love Sakura more than I love anyone. That will never change.”

Naruto’s smile nearly blinded him and he knew he’d made the right decision, to share his thoughts and feelings.

XX

“I have two suitors currently, Sakura.” Hinata announced heavily.

Sakura stared at Hinata with disbelief. “Two suitors? You’re seeing two guys at the same time?”

“It is the responsibility and honour of the heir to marry and secure the Hyuga kekkai genkai for future generations.” Hinata intoned. “And both men are acceptable matches for me. They have no objection to me seeing them both.”

“But what about Naruto?” Sakura questioned with rising ire. “He wants to ask you out! Isn’t this what you wanted, Hinata?”

Hinata’s composure faltered before her expression turned once more serene. “It would have once overjoyed me, Sakura. But my duty as the heiress to the Hyuga clan is both an honour and privilege and I must show that I’m deserving of it.”

“So Hanabi’s dumped this on you,” Sakura concluded bitterly. “After almost five years she decided that she didn’t want the privilege that was stripped from you.”

Hinata’s eyes widened in distress, her lips compressing in determination. “Hanabi should never have been put in this position in the first place. If I wasn’t so weak, so focused on catching up to Naruto then she would have had a normal childhood.”

Sakura’s expression softened with Hinata’s dismay. “That wasn’t your fault Hinata. You’ve always been strong; your father was just too blind to see it.”

“Even if that were true,” Hinata said sadly, “My father would never approve of me marrying Naruto. He might have saved the village but he’s still the Jinchuuriki of the nine-tails and an orphan with no clan to stand behind him.”

“Clan politics,” Sakura said with disgust. “I really hate them. Can’t you explain that he’s your soulmate?”

Hinata shook her head. “They Hyuga Clan elders don’t place any importance in soulmarks. I’m the first in two generations to manifest a mark and they were not pleased when they found out. They wanted to try and burn it from my skin before my father convinced them how useless that would be.”

“But you love him?” Sakura implored with tear-filled eyes.

“I do,” Hinata said with conviction, “And I always will but life isn’t that simple Sakura. You should realize this better than anyone. Sometimes our soulmates are simply unsuitable. You and Kakashi belong together and you’ve known for years but Naruto has just discovered I exist and it’s too late. I can’t stake the future of my clan on a possibility.”

Sakura wanted to protest, to rage at the unfairness of it and smash the Hyuga compound to pieces but she understood. She was blessed in a way to never have been born to one of Konoha’s respected clans. She knew from the members of Team 10 and Hinata’s teammates that being part of a clan involved a lot of hierarchy and ceremony and the Hyuga clan was one of the strictest due to their kekkai genkei being so rare and important to Konoha, both in terms of prestige and formidability. Few Hyuga had ever become a missing-nin for long and survived.

“He does care for you,” Sakura said weakly. “You should have seen how excited he was to ask you out.”

Hinata’s pressed a fist to her mouth and twisted away as a sob escaped her lips. Her shoulders shook as she did her best to stifle her cries.

“I’m sorry Hinata,” Sakura said with alarm. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

It took a few minutes for Hinata to compose herself before she was able to turn back to Sakura with a semi-neutral expression. But her red-rimmed eyes and swollen features betrayed her sorrow. “Please don’t worry about me Sakura.” Hinata ducked her head, her hair shielding her face. “I’ve known my duty from the moment I was old enough to understand. It was my fault for deceiving myself with the belief that I could ever marry Naruto.”

“Talk to your father,” Sakura begged finally. “Tell him how you feel. I don’t want to break Naruto’s heart and seeing you so sad is killing me when it could be solved so easily.”

“If only I had that kind of power, to break Naruto’s heart.” Hinata said wistfully. “I think you overestimate my importance to him, but I will speak to my father.”

“That’s all I’m asking,” Sakura said with relief.

“Thank you for telling me Sakura.” Hinata said with a small smile. “Even if I never see him again, I have at least the knowledge that I mean more to Naruto than I could imagine.”

“Don’t be so dramatic,” Sakura chided. “This will work out, you’ll see.”

“If only,” Hinata wished.

Sakura left Hinata then, off to see Tsunade in the hospital. Hinata watched her depart with a hopeful expression. The worst her father could say was no to Naruto courting her. It was more hope than Hinata had allowed herself to harbour in years. 

She left the training grounds fully preoccupied with what she would say to her father, never noticing that he was standing within the walls of the compound with his Byakugan activated, having heard the entire conversation between his daughter and Sakura. He turned away from his daughter’s retreating form with a dark scowl.

XX

Danzo left for the Five Kage Summit, set up solely for the purpose of deciding what to do about Sasuke and whoever was supporting or controlling him. Team Kakashi was well aware of what Danzo’s position on Sasuke was and if he convinced the rest of the Kage to see the issue as he did, then nothing would save Sasuke. Too many people would die in the pursuit of their goals to destroy Sasuke. Team Kakashi understood this better than most after their last confrontation with Sasuke. He was slipping away from the boy they’d known, and darkness had continued to grow in his heart.

Sakura watched Naruto struggle with his conflicting feelings about Sasuke. His promise to bring Sasuke back no matter what was beginning to wear on him and nothing she could say would change his mind. He loved Sasuke as a brother and that alone dictated the path he would take. He had saved Gaara, which gave him hope, and he never gave up. Naruto would kill himself in the effort to bring Sasuke back and Sakura could no longer bear it.

Her feelings surrounding Sasuke were complicated. She wasn’t in love with him as she once imagined she was. She cared for him as part of her team, and she wished for his safe return if only to relieve the burden of guilt that Naruto and Kakashi shouldered because of him. Kakashi saw himself in Sasuke and she could understand why. But when she looked at Kakashi, she saw a man that had done his best to overcome his anger against the machinations of the village for the sake of the innocent people they served. Konoha could be cruel, Sakumo Hatake being a prime example. Or Naruto for that matter, shunned because of something he couldn’t control and lied to his entire life. Both of them had become men she admired, each of them stronger in their own way than she could ever hope to be. Both protected a village that had betrayed them in some respect. Naruto had lost his family, his identity, and the respect and happiness he should have grown up with. He’d been kicked down too many times to count, no one really standing in his corner until Iruka had seen a part of himself in the orphan. And Kakashi had lost a father to ridicule and village dynamics. He’d lost his team and sensei to the shinobi life, and he’d lost part of himself serving in Anbu. But he still served the village faithfully because he understood where the path that Sasuke had chosen would lead.

Sasuke’s loss could not be compared in terms of better or worse but the choices he’d made were ones that Sakura couldn’t understand. She’d tried for his sake, for their team’s sake but she was faltering in her support of him, seeing only a man that was threatening to tear their village apart with his actions, and breaking Naruto and Kakashi’s hearts in the process. Naruto begged Kakashi and Yamato to bring him to the Five Kage Summit to ask for leniency for Sasuke and they relented, though Yamato was very reluctant to do so, trusting Kakashi’s judgment more than he trusted Naruto’s faith in Sasuke.

Before they left, Kakashi stopped by Sakura’s apartment to say goodbye. She answered the door with a concerned frown. She knew where he was going and she was upset that she was not included in his plans.

“We’re leaving tomorrow morning,” Kakashi said softly in way of greeting.

“Without me,” Sakura said bitterly.

“I know I don’t have the right after everything, but your safety will always be my first concern. Danzo will be there and we don’t know what reception we’ll receive considering our request.”

Sakura sighed, too tired to argue. She wasn’t sure that she would even be helpful, confused as she was about what she thought of Sasuke. “I know,” she relented. “Be careful.”

She couldn’t help herself, reaching for his cheek and stroking the skin along the edge of his mask. Kakashi leaned into her touch, eyes closing in contentment.

“I love you Kakashi,” she whispered, needing to say the words despite the strain in their relationship.

Kakashi sighed softly, his eye opening and making contact with her own. “Sakura,” he murmured with regret.

“I don’t expect you to say it back. I just needed to say it. I know you’re aware of it and I’ve spoken about it before but…” Sakura bit her lip, not sure what she was trying to verbalize. “I needed you to hear it.” Her hand dropped from his cheek and she ducked her head.

Kakashi ushered her deeper into her apartment, closing the door softy behind him. They were left in hazy lighting, the light of the moon illuminating Kakashi’s face but leaving Sakura’s in shadow as her back faced the closest window. His fingers went to his Hitae-ate and pulled it from around his forehead, setting it carefully on the small table she used to hold her odds and ends. Sakura watched him carefully as he pulled down his mask and faced her with his Sharingan closed.

“I don’t want there to be any confusion.” He clarified. His hands mirrored her own action and cupped her cheeks, gently tilting her face and gaze to his. “I love you Sakura.” His lone eye burned into hers, trying to convey his sincerity and conviction. “I don’t know how to make you understand. I love you more than anything, more than anyone else. If you die, there won’t be any part of me left.”

Sakura’s eyes welled with tears, her hand coming to rest over one of his own. “But why push me away? We’re both miserable, and who knows how much time we have left.” She felt the urgency, as she knew he did, as if time was growing shorter with the threat of war approaching.

“You were right,” Kakashi conceded with a sad smile. “I was trying to make decisions for you because I thought I knew what was best. I let what others thought cloud my judgment and influence my decisions.”

“Who?” Sakura demanded with steel in her voice.

“It doesn’t matter,” Kakashi said. “I shouldn’t have let it matter. I’ve made so many mistakes. Can you forgive me?”

Sakura searched his expression and smiled. He kissed her smile, free hand wrapping around her waist and pulling her closer. Sakura’s mouth opened to his, tongue sliding against his as he tasted her. Her arms slipped around his neck, fingers sinking into his unruly hair. He pulled away with a sharp intake of air, tucking her under his chin and breathing in her scent.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” he promised Sakura. “Nothing would keep me away.”

“Stay safe,” Sakura commanded softly. “And take care of Naruto. He’s still hurt after Hinata rejected him.”

“I will,” Kakashi sighed at the thought of Naruto, who was incredibly morose after Hinata told him that she was already seeing someone. He pulled away from Sakura reluctantly. “Goodnight Sakura.” Sakura hesitated, an offer to spend the night on the tip of her tongue, even just to sleep. One look at Kakashi quieted her. He was watching her knowingly, but he shook his head. “Naruto is in my apartment. He’s taking Hinata’s rejection hard.”

“Goodnight Kakashi.”

She watched until he disappeared around his apartment building with a disappointed frown.

XX

Despite their private goodbye, Sakura saw them off the next morning, outside but within sight of the village gate. Kakashi was his typical self, Icha Icha held in one hand as he perused the pages. Sakura smirked at him, and he offered her an eye crease in return.

Naruto was uncharacteristically quiet, expression pensive as he stared back at Konoha and towards the Hyuga compound.

“Naruto!” Sakura called him sharply for the third time. He glanced at her with chagrin. “Do what Kakashi and Yamato suggest,” she commanded him.

“It’s not a suggestion if I have no choice Sakura.” Naruto grumbled good-naturedly, attempting a smile.

“Good,” Sakura pulled him into a hug, squeezing him a little too tight as she worried about how he was doing. “That way you’ll stay safe.”

“I’ll be okay!” Naruto announced loudly.

Sakura looked him in the eyes, smiling softly at whatever she saw. “Yes, you will,” she assured him. “And Hinata will come to her senses by the time you get back.”

“Sakura!” Naruto squeaked, glancing around furtively in case someone was close enough to hear. He ignored Kakashi’s pitying expression.

“Relax Naruto,” Kakashi laughed, ruffling his hair. “It’s not like Hinata is here.”

A small cough interrupted Kakashi’s teasing and Naruto turned bright red when he saw Hinata standing behind them with an uncertain smile. Sakura elbowed Kakashi hard in the ribs and he groaned quietly as she stepped forward.

“Hinata! Did you come to say goodbye?” At Hinata’s nod, she turned towards Naruto and grinned at him. “Wasn’t that nice, Naruto?” She rolled her eyes as Naruto scratched the back of his head and nodded wordlessly. “Kakashi and I will just go over here, right now.” Sakura grabbed Kakashi’s hand and yanked him towards the village.

Hinata took in Naruto with a concerned frown. His blue eyes didn’t seem as bright today, and the smile on his face was clearly forced. She’d really made this awkward then. Naruto had approached her so boldly the other day and asked her if she wanted to go out for ramen.

“Like a date?” she’d nearly fainted at his enthusiastic nod, clutching her stomach as nerves threatened to make her empty the meagre contents of her stomach. She wanted to say yes, it was at the tip of her tongue, but she hadn’t spoken to her father yet and she’d already made commitments that week to her other suitors. She blurted it out gracelessly and made a fool of herself.

“I’m already dating someone else,” she felt her face flushing as she further admitted, “actually I’m seeing two people,” At Naruto’s horrified expression, she’d just dug the hole deeper. “It’s okay, Naruto! They know about each other. My father asked me to consider one of them to marry,” She’d nearly collapsed as she watched all colour drain from Naruto’s face.

The entire conversation had only gone downhill from there. Until Naruto had simply run away from her bumbling explanations. She’d wanted to call him back, but she realized that until she talked to her father, it would be useless. What he must think of her.

She’d come here to try and explain. Her father had sequestered himself with the Hyuga clan elders for the past week and he’d been far too busy for her to speak to him, no matter how urgent she felt it was. She couldn’t make him any promises, but she wanted Naruto to know that she would have loved to say yes.

“I just came to apologize,” Hinata started with. As Naruto opened his mouth to speak Hinata raised a hand and halted whatever he was going to say, “Please Naruto, let me explain!” She pleaded with her eyes and watched as his pinched expression softened and he nodded.

Hinata looked around, using her Byakugan to ensure their complete privacy. It wasn’t an ideal location and she realized that there were too many people around. She grabbed Naruto’s hand and tugged him into the trees that surrounded Konoha, until they were far enough from the gates not to be heard by Izumo and Kotetsu who watched them leave with wide eyes. They’d never seen Hinata so forceful before.

“I’m sorry Naruto,” Hinata said softly. She held on to his hand and squeezed it gently, taking strength from the warmth of his grip and the calloused palms that clasped her own. “Sometimes,” Hinata laughed, “Every time I try to talk to you, I feel like the words get lost somewhere between my heart and my head and they always come out wrong.” She sighed. “You know I’m the heir to the Hyuga clan.” At Naruto’s hesitant nod, Hinata continued sadly. “I’ll be of age soon and the clan leaders want to see me married as soon as possible.”

“No!” Naruto shouted his denial with twisted features, red seeping into his eyes at the thought of Hinata marrying anyone else.

“It’s tradition,” Hinata said softly. “And I’ve been neglecting my duties. That’s why my father asked me to allow two men to court me at once, so I may have some semblance of choice. They are distant cousins of mine, our blood relation too weak to be a danger to our future children but strong enough that they don’t threaten the probability of passing the Byakugan on.”

Naruto snarled, the strange chakra of the Nine tailed Fox beginning to bubble from the surface of his skin. It was instinctual, Hinata’s hand going to his cheek to calm him. His face tilted into her palm and Naruto squeezed his eyes shut as he focused on calming himself. He felt Kurama’s amusement and used his embarrassment and the feel of Hinata’s skin against his own to anchor him. He opened his eyes and focused on Hinata’s pale lavender eyes.

“Is that what you want?” He asked her, his voice guttural. “To marry one of these men?”

“Ye-no!” Hinata’s agonized eyes implored him to understand. “I have a duty to my clan. For the first time in my life, I can make my father proud.”

Naruto’s hand moved over hers, holding her palm to his face. “But will that make you happy, Hinata?”

Hinata thought of what her father would say if he were to see her here, one hand cradling Naruto’s cheek and the other gripping his jacket. How had it gotten there? But as she looked at Naruto, she realized with shock that she recognized the look on his face. It was the look she saw reflected when she stared into a mirror. He was looking at her as if she was the only thing that mattered. And she wanted so desperately to tell him that he was her soulmate but it didn’t matter in the end. She would have loved him all the same.

“No,” she admitted. “They can’t make me happy.” She pushed away the fleeting emotions of sorrow at how disappointed her father would be. “What would make me happy is to go out for ramen with you.”

Naruto’s smile nearly blinded her, his blue eyes tearing up as he wrapped his arms around her waist and swung her around. “Let’s go right now! Ichiraku opens pretty soon but I’m sure I can convince Ayame to open early!”

Hinata laughed at Naruto’s eagerness. “When you get back, Naruto. Kakashi-sensei is waiting for you.”

Naruto’s expression sobered quickly as he remembered why Kakashi was waiting for him. Sasuke. How had he forgotten so easily? Hinata’s tender expression reminded him why. When she looked at him like that he never wanted to leave her side. “We’ll go the day I get back, the minute I step through that gate and not a second sooner.” Naruto declared.

“That sounds perfect,” Hinata agreed with a smile.

Naruto realized with horror that he was still holding Hinata to him, and it was doing interesting things to him. He stepped away from her quickly, scratching his head and feeling suddenly awkward and a bit like the idiot that Sakura claimed he was. “Good!” He smiled wide, hoping Hinata didn’t notice the reason his face was turning red.

Hinata giggled softly at his discomposure, hand covering her mouth at Naruto’s sudden bashfulness. “Should we find Kakashi-sensei and Sakura?”

“Yes!” Naruto agreed eagerly. He took her hand and led her back to the village gate, proud and a little smug when Hinata didn’t pull away, even when Kotetsu and Izumo raised their eyebrows at their joined hands. Those two were the biggest gossips in Konoha, next to Ino and it would be all over the village by the end of the day. Good, Naruto thought with satisfaction.

He said goodbye to Hinata, pulling her close for a hug, too nervous to attempt a kiss in front of the amused Kakashi and fawning Sakura, who’d reappeared beside them. She hugged him back just as tightly.

“Please be careful, Naruto.”

“Of course!” He promised her. “I’ll be back before you know it!”

He watched Hinata’s retreating form with longing, already missing her. He allowed Sakura and Kakashi to pull him further from the village reluctantly, and did his best to give them some semblance of privacy as they said their own goodbyes. His expression twisted in disgust as they kissed, Sakura clutching Kakashi close with an urgency that Naruto found faintly amusing. It wasn’t like they were facing Pein again. But he understood what she was feeling. It was still a goodbye and it would probably be weeks before they saw each other again.

He’d come to terms with their relationship and was happy that Kakashi had seemed to pull his head out of his ass long enough to realize that he and Sakura belonged together. It made sense to Naruto. He yelped in surprise as Yamato gripped his shoulder, pointing towards Sakura and Kakashi with shock.

“How long has that been going on?”

Naruto laughed at his dumbfounded expression, “They’re soulmates. Didn’t you know Taichou?” Naruto asked smugly.

XX

Sakura watched them leave, heart heavy as she considered what they were trying to accomplish. Her time with Kakashi always seemed too short, hours falling away from them until they were forced to separate again. She was growing tired of always fighting, always moving onto the next mission without pause. There were moments of levity, but they seemed fewer and farther between.

She turned away from them with renewed determination. She’d been talking with the other teams and they’d come up with a solution to the Sasuke problem on their own. A more permanent one than the temporary reprieve that Naruto sought. Sasuke was her friend and she loved him as such, but she loved Naruto as a brother and she wanted to spare him any more pain then was necessary. Shikamaru was the brains of their group, and he understood what Kakashi and Naruto refused to. Sasuke was a liability to the Hidden Leaf and threatened to tear their village apart. She hurt for his past suffering and she couldn’t imagine going through what he had, but he was a danger to Naruto, to Kakashi and to every person that lived in their village. There was only one way to ensure Naruto and Kakashi’s safety. She just didn’t know if she was strong enough to go through with it.

Chapter Text

Sakura went to see Tsunade before her small summit with the rest of her peers. It was hard to see Tsunade lying so still, her body appearing so frail when Sakura had always found her to be the strongest person she knew. Shizune was attending her diligently, monitoring her vitals and holding her surrogate aunt’s hand with a desperate grip. Genma was sitting behind her, offering her some comfort with his presence. His trademark senbon was absent as he rested his hand on Shizune’s shoulder.

Sakura ached at the casual intimacy, wishing that she could be so open with Kakashi. She missed him even now, though they had only been apart for hours. She wondered briefly how Tsunade had survived and eventually thrived as Hokage after suffering such loss. First Dan, then Jiraiya, but her Shishou had always stood strong, beyond the lapse when she had drunkenly told Sakura to hold onto her soulmate with everything she had. Now she was unconscious, slipping further and further away from returning to them, and Danzo had taken over Konoha so easily.

Sakura sighed, wondering how Kakashi and Naruto were, and what she could do to help them in her own way. She felt so useless here, waiting impatiently in Konoha for their return. She wasn’t meant to wait; she wasn’t used to being idle. Her thoughts were interrupted by a light cough and she turned to see Sai entering the tent with a solemn expression.

“I’m sorry about Hokage-sama,” he intoned dutifully but Sakura could see that he was truly regretful. He hadn’t yet mastered emotions, but he’d improved so much in such a short time. Enough that she could call him friend easily.

“She will wake up,” Sakura said with determination, clenching her fist.

Sai blinked at her vehemence. “She may,” he acceded, “but until she does, we must help Naruto in whatever way we can. I know I am not Sasuke and I have not been assigned to Team Kakashi for exceedingly long, but even I can understand that we rely on Naruto too much. He is determined to save Sasuke for his team and himself. He would kill himself in the attempt without thought. He is impulsive and even the thought of Hinata waiting so fervently for his return will not dissuade him.”

Sakura wanted to protest, tears stinging her eyes at the thought of Naruto’s death and Hinata’s grief. And though Hinata was his soulmate, Sakura was the closest to a sister as she could be without blood. For so long Team 7 was her home and family, more even than her own parents. Hinata was Naruto’s future and that stung just a little, but Sakura would not forget their shared past. She swallowed hard at Sai’s blunt statements, but he spoke only as he knew how, honestly and without a filter. Naruto would be determined for his own reasons, and he never went back on his word.

Sai continued with a fierce expression. “I did not understand what the warmth in my gut meant, but now I know that it is anger. Sasuke will destroy you both and we can’t rely on Naruto to end this for us.”

Sakura nodded, eyes widening in surprise as Shikamaru stepped into the tent. “Sai is right, Sakura. We must stop Sasuke and the Akatsuki to avoid war between Konohagakure and Kumogakure. If Naruto fails to save Sasuke, he will not stand for it. We will all end up in a war of revenge, shinobi from each village killing each other for their lost sons and daughters. Sasuke is already a criminal, and it is Konoha’s duty to deal with him.”

Sakura swallowed hard, knowing the truth in his statements but it was still a bitter pill to swallow. Sasuke was her teammate, and a part of Team 7. To Naruto that would never change. He had lost so many people before he’d even had the chance to know them. He’d lived in isolation, feared by the town his very existence had saved. But he was the brightest light of them all, the hero of Konoha that held all its hope on his shoulders. But before that, before he’d known Konoha’s esteem, Yamato’s affectionate admonishments, Sai’s oblivious rivalry, he’d been part of Team 7 and they’d faced the world together. It was the first time that Naruto had experienced what it was like to have someone guard your back and stand at your side. Their team should have never worked. Sakura was too weak, foolish over a boy and man who ignored her and blind to everything that mattered. Naruto was too reckless, thoughtless and loudmouthed. Sasuke was too bitter, too focused on avenging the death of his family that it was consuming him. Kakashi was jaded, perpetually late, a loner for most of his life and a bit perverted. Yet somehow as Team 7 they worked. Looking back, Sakura admitted that it was Naruto who made them work. Too stubborn to let them fall apart. His Nindo the only thing that kept him going during desperate moments, and them in turn.

Sakura’s resolve firmed and she set aside her childhood dream to save Sasuke. She set aside the hope she’d held deep in her heart that they could bring Sasuke home. She’d always hoped that Naruto’s stubborn nature would be able to bring him back when nothing else could, not obligation to his home, not love for his team or his people, not his duty as a shinobi of Konoha. Naruto always seemed to accomplish the impossible from the moment she’d met him. And after he’d defeated Pein and brought Kakashi back from death's door, she believed that he was the only one that could make Sasuke see reason.

Naruto had saved the most precious person to her in the world. And she wished she could grant him the same, to save one of his first friends. But there were other ways you could save someone, even if it was only from tthemselves. It seemed that the most useless member of Team 7 would have to save her teammates from making mistakes they would forever regret. Naruto didn’t deserve to bear the burden of their wayward teammate anymore. Sasuke…she couldn’t say what he deserved. She couldn’t say he deserved death for what he’d done, but she knew he couldn’t be allowed to continue on his path of vengeance. And Kakashi, no matter how nonchalant Kakashi acted, he cared deeply for his students. He would put his life on the line if he thought he could save Sasuke or Naruto, or even if he thought it would somehow ease her pain. He was by Naruto’s side right now, and he would protect Naruto with his life if he had to.

Sasuke is no longer the person we think he is and he’s far beyond our reach.

That was the mantra that kept her going, even as she planned with the other teams on the best way to kill the boy she’d formerly been obsessed with, and more importantly, the boy who’d once been her teammate and friend. Her heart ached as she considered their time together, as she remembered the Sasuke she’d grown up with. He’d always been silent and moody. She’d been fascinated with him, drawn to the edgier parts of his personality, and failing to see the darkness that was slowly growing within him. Naruto had known as early as Sasuke demanding to fight him. Though Kakashi had stopped the fight, had saved them both from injuring the other, Sasuke was already lost to them. Naruto had seen, had felt the distance Sasuke was forcing between them. But Naruto would never truly believe that Sasuke couldn’t be returned to them someday.

So, this burden of ending Sasuke’s mission of vengeance had fallen to her. Sasuke was too strong to capture and imprison, and too determined to let go of his chosen path now. Maybe if they had more time, maybe if the original Team 7 had been more open, or observant, had done something differently in the past Sasuke might not be who he was. Maybe it was her fault, for pursuing him so desperately in her youth, and then giving up so easily when Kakashi had shown the slightest affection.

There were too many maybes. She could drive herself mad considering how she’d failed Sasuke, how each of them had, the entire village, and his entire dead family in turn. Whatever the cause of his twisted beliefs, they could not excuse his actions. She didn’t know his end goal, now that Itachi was dead but she couldn’t let him accomplish it, no matter the cost to their team and her own conscience.

She went to Naruto because she had to try at least to change his mind. Kiba and Akamaru found him easily, but she knew when they were on the right track before Akamaru did. It felt like a compass within her, always guiding her towards Kakashi. She felt the moment it clicked into place, as they ran further and further into the land of Iron. Her feet sped up, heart lifting as she pushed towards Kakashi, and towards a confrontation with Naruto. She had to convince him to let Sasuke go. It was only the first part of her plan to save her team.

XX

They’d met the Raikage on their path to the summit, the man large and imposing and heart hardened to Naruto’s pleas. Naruto had fallen to his knees, uncaring of the weakness he might be displaying. He needed to save Sasuke. Sasuke was a part of Team 7, and he wasn’t just a friend. To Naruto, he was family, and he would never abandon family. Despite his desperate, heartfelt pleas, Naruto failed to convince the Raikage. He’d failed to clear the death sentence that hung over Sasuke’s head. Kakashi had tried his best to convince the Raikage, if only for Naruto’s sake. He wasn’t sure what destiny held for them, or if letting Sasuke die wasn’t the right choice in the end. It didn’t matter, Naruto held enough belief and determination for the both of them.

“He is bowing his head to you, in service of a friend. Bringing himself so low out of love and affection for Konohagakure, and for your own village, and offering a peaceful resolution. As a Kage, what do you think of that?”

Despite his words, and Yamato pointing out the needless death of Neji’s father that was demanded by Kumogakure in the past, the Raikage walked away, and Naruto hit the ground with his fist in anguish, grief audible as he cried at his own failure.

He’d barely given time to reconcile the Raikage’s words when they were confronted with news that could only further distress Naruto by the one that called himself Madara Uchiha.

Kakashi wanted to take Naruto’s pain at hearing Itachi’s story, and hearing of the reason Sasuke was deprived of a happy upbringing. He felt his own grief for a young Itachi, who he’d met in Anbu. A man that had sacrificed his family, and himself to satisfy his own honour and keep the village safe. Hearing that Sasuke had killed him so easily concerned Kakashi. If he could shelter Naruto and Sakura from any more pain related to Sasuke he would. If he could take the burden Naruto willingly shouldered as his own, he would jump at the chance. Team 7 might be fractured but Kakashi would always see Sakura and Naruto as his to protect. Sasuke too, though it hurt to contemplate how their relationship had disintegrated and how it ultimately must end. He had shaped them, had watched them grow, and failed them all in certain ways.

He would not change the people that Naruto and Sakura had become. He wouldn’t even change the fact that he was both Sakura’s sensei and her soulmate. If he had not known her from the start, he would never have let her in. He would still be the same lonely man who closed himself off from others by choice and run twice as far from Sakura.

There was too much for Naruto to absorb when Sakura and Sai appeared with Kiba and Lee in tow. Kakashi caught Sakura’s scent before she appeared within sight, his heart leaping at her presence, even as he knew she shouldn’t be there. He’d asked her to stay in the village. He wanted her safe from the decisions of the Kage, safe from Sasuke and his manipulation.

They all turned at the sound of footfalls crunching in the snow, speed clearly prioritized over stealth. Naruto’s eyes widened in surprise as he saw the four of them. “Sakura? Sai, Kiba and even Lee?”

Kakashi’s eyes sought out Sakura’s, but her focus remained on Naruto with her features set in determination. Nevertheless, he questioned them, questioned her. “Why did you come here?”

Sakura’s mouth tightened at his voice, and she resisted the urge to look towards Kakashi. She was here for a reason, so she directed her answer at the person she was here to see. “Naruto, I need to talk to you.”

Kakashi wasn’t oblivious to the serious expressions the four wore, and he looked to Naruto to gauge his reaction.

“What is it Sakura?” Naruto asked, his countenance heavy and defeated as he jumped from the roof to meet her face to face.

“I love you, Naruto,” she declared boldly and was met with shocked expressions from Lee, and Yamato, the latter glancing nervously at Kakashi who wore a steely expression.

“What?” Naruto muttered in confusion; his own gaze drawn towards Kakashi-sensei.

Sakura flushed as she realized that it sounded like she was declaring her love for Naruto. She looked apologetically towards Kakashi, who’s eyebrow raised in query. She could feel Lee’s eyes burning a hole in the back of her head, probably as equally confused as Yamato was, knowing that Kakashi and she were soulmates. Kiba and Sai remained neutral, curious only to see what Sakura’s ploy was.

“I love you Naruto, like a brother,” she amended carefully. “And I need you to make me a promise, to stop chasing after Sasuke.”

Naruto sighed, thoughts circling darkly around the Raikage’s refusal to listen, and the masked shinobi’s revelations on Itachi Uchiha and his massacre of the Uchiha clan. Naruto didn’t fully understand how it was all connected, and why it played out the way it did but he knew that Sasuke must be hurting after killing his own flesh and blood, and finding out the reason his family died was vaguely justified.

“I would promise you anything,” Naruto affirmed softly. “But I can’t promise you that.”

“Idiot!” Sakura snarled in frustration. At Naruto’s disgruntled expression, she took his hand and spoke carefully. “I once thought I loved Sasuke with all my heart. I dreamed of marrying him one day, but you know the reason those dreams faded.” Naruto nodded, eyes darting towards Kakashi warily. “Even as those dreams faded, I still cared for him. We became a team, and he saved my life more than once. I owe him so much.” Sakura paused, fighting back tears at the thought of their wayward teammate. “But we’re not children anymore Naruto. We cannot foolishly hope that Sasuke will return to us and honour the bonds we once shared with him. He’s a traitor, and I don’t want any of you to get hurt chasing after his shadow. I’m selfish Naruto. I can’t lose Kakashi again.” Tears escaped and Sakura wiped them away angrily. “Please Naruto, I’m willing to let go of Sasuke to keep you both safe. I can’t lose you too.”

Naruto’s face clouded as he once again thought of Itachi and Sasuke and the decisions that had set them against each other. “I know what your feelings for Sasuke were. I hated him for having your affection. Maybe I could have let him go three years ago. Maybe I wouldn’t have cared about his decisions before we became a team. Even though I don’t love you like that because I love Hinata, and you love...” he cleared his throat, “I can’t give up. Even if you don’t care about Sasuke anymore, it doesn’t change what I need to do.” Naruto’s voice rose in ire. “There are reasons you don’t know-“

“Naruto,” Kakashi snapped in warning.

Naruto paused, remembering the earlier conversation he’d had with Kakashi and Yamato, and his subsequent promise not to reveal any of Madara’s story until they could verify it. “I’m going to bring Sasuke back,” Naruto said instead.

Sakura’s face twisted in frustration and she looked towards Kakashi for support, though she found none. He regretted his silence, but he’d already made a promise to himself to support Naruto in his quest to bring Sasuke home. Even if he agreed with Sakura’s assessment, he needed to give Naruto this chance. He shook his head and his eyes pleaded with her to forgive him, knowing how scared she was.

Sakura turned away from them with defeated tears. “I want you to come home, Naruto. I want you safe. And you’re acting like a foolish child! Don’t you think Hinata is worried? Do you think I want Kakashi hurt again, when we just got him back?”

Naruto flinched at the jab, but stood his ground. “I don’t need your support Sakura, and Kakashi-sensei can leave whenever he wants.”

Sakura closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, fighting the urge to punch Naruto and drag him home. That would solve nothing. He would be gone the second he woke up. Why wasn’t Kakashi on her side? Couldn’t he see she was only trying to keep them safe? Didn’t he see that it would destroy her if he died again?

“Sakura,” Kakashi murmured her name, stepping forward and placing his hand on her shoulder. “Naruto knows what he’s doing.”

Sakura was blinded by fear for their lives. Sasuke was lost to them and he wouldn’t hold back against them. She slapped Kakashi’s hand off her shoulder and strode away angrily. “Forget it, Kakashi. I’m going back. Let’s go Kiba, Sai, Lee-san.”

“Sakura!” Kakashi called her back, wanting to reassure her.

Sakura ignored his plea and started running. She didn’t notice the clone Sai left behind.

XX

“The teams came to an agreement to deal with Sasuke on our own.” Sai said calmly.

“Deal with Sasuke?” Naruto questioned in disbelief. “You mean kill him? And Sakura agreed to this?”

“After he joined the Akatsuki, we could no longer tolerate his actions.” Sai continued.

“But Sasuke is part of Team 7! Sakura said it herself, she still cares for Sasuke!”

Sai frowned, “it’s because she cares for Sasuke that she can’t let him continue down this path of evil.”

“She means to kill him herself.” Kakashi said with dawning horror.

Naruto's eyes widened in disbelief, shaking his head in denial.

“Yes,” Sai agreed softly. “I believe she does. She agreed too readily to our plans to go after him. If she’d truly wanted back up, I'm sure she would have told Kakashi at the very least.”

Naruto opened his mouth to speak, anguish written across his face when their conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Gaara and his siblings.

“I need to tell you what happened at the summit.” Gaara announced heavily. “It concerns Sasuke Uchiha.”

Gaara's words held Naruto's rapt attention but Kakashi barely spared them a glance, mind racing on how to stop Sakura. She was strong and she'd grown so much as a shinobi but Itachi had been one of the most skilled in the village and Sasuke had killed him.

Where are you going Sakura? Please don’t face him alone.

 XX

Despite her agreement with the other teams, Sakura didn’t want anyone hurt because of her former teammate. Sasuke had proven capable of beating them all, and she had no doubt he’d only honed his abilities with killing intent in the years since he’d left the village. He was hers to deal with because Naruto wouldn’t and she couldn’t ask Kakashi to kill another teammate on her behalf, especially his former student.

She knocked the boys out easily, none of them except Sai expecting the betrayal, but even he fell under her trap. She knew she didn’t have that much of a headstart before they woke up and she needed to move. Her confrontation with Sasuke needed to be well and truly finished before they awoke and had a chance to alert Naruto or Kakashi to what she was doing.

As Sakura sped towards her confrontation with Sasuke, she could admit to herself that the feelings twisting her stomach weren’t just ones of regret and grief. She was well aware of the danger Sasuke posed to the Leaf Village, and to her specifically, as his attack against her during their previous confrontation had been blocked by Yamato. No, it wasn’t just that she was sad at what this confrontation meant, she was afraid of her former teammate. She knew her own strength, but she wasn’t blind to Sasuke’s inherent talent and skill. And she was at a distinct disadvantage from the beginning. She didn’t want to kill him. He wouldn’t have the same qualms. Any hesitation on her part would mean the difference between life and death. She didn’t want to leave Kakashi behind, but she could no longer tolerate Sasuke’s behaviour. She smiled in grim amusement as she realized that she still viewed Sasuke as an errant child in some regards. And it was time to punish him for his misdeeds.

XX

The talk with Gaara had gone as smoothly as it could under the circumstances, with Naruto reacting as expected, even as unwise as it was to create a rift with the new Kazekage. Kakashi was floored by the information that he was considered the de facto Hokage since Sasuke had killed Danzo. It was a responsibility that he’d never wanted, and it would further complicate his relationship with Sakura. If having a relationship with your team leader and former sensei was against the rules, then what would that mean if he was Hokage instead? Would that make it better or worse that the most respected person in the village was pursuing a relationship with his former student? Even if that student was no longer his student and no longer a child.

He shoved the thoughts away for the time being, focusing on the more immediate concern of what would happen if Sakura found Sasuke. He would never call Sakura weak, but Sasuke had always been the strongest of his class, far surpassing his team in terms of skill and natural ability. Even if Sakura could keep up with his Sharingan, Sasuke had one major advantage over all of them. He had no qualms about killing any of them to further sever his ties to Konoha.

  XX

She didn’t know what she’d feel seeing him again. He was once such a large part of her life. She’d become rivals with her best friend in some pointless competition to get his attention. She’d convinced herself that she’d loved him and she’d certainly been infatuated with him. But that infatuation had been faded over time when Kakashi had entered her life, replaced with respect and a different type of devotion. A devotion to her teammate, to her family. Now, she didn’t know if she could feel that way ever again, as she watched him preparing to kill the red-haired girl who was clearly injured.

She considered trying to trick him, but knew immediately that wouldn’t work. He’d spent years under Orichimaru and that guy was the slipperiest bastard she knew. She considered trying to reason with him, but Naruto had tried that and failed. His relationship with Naruto was deeper than hers so she knew she had no chance.

So she did what she did best. He was distracted, and while he was surely quicker, Sakura was strong now. She wasn’t quick enough, his face turning towards her as her fist swung forward. Her fist met wood instead of flesh and he disappeared in a cloud of smoke as Sakura jumped away. Substitution jutsu, dammit. 

She faced him, a shiver of apprehension running down her spine as she took in his soulless eyes. This wasn’t the Sasuke she’d grown up with.

“Sakura,” Sasuke scowled. “What are you doing here?”

“I’ve come to deal with you.”

Sasuke’s head tilted, eyeing her curiously before he threw his head back and laughed bitterly. “Konoha sent you?”

Sakura growled at the derision in Sasuke’s voice. He clearly didn’t see her as a threat. She would change that perspective quickly. She pulled her gloves tightly onto her hands and grinned. “No one sent me. I came because you needed to be dealt with.”

Sasuke stared her down but she refused to be intimidated. He was dangerous, but he was also clearly exhausted, blood leaking from the corner of his overused Sharingan. She might have a slim chance of beating him, but it was better than nothing.                                                                                       

Sakura lunged towards him again, twisting as he disappeared from her view in a burst of speed and reappearing next to her, chidori arcing towards her. She didn’t panic, expecting it as she’d seen him preparing to use it on the immobile kunoichi. Sakura gathered chakra densely around the point of contact, attempting to dodge the attack, the chakra she’d built up taking the majority of what she couldn’t dodge and exploding in a blinding display Sasuke wasn’t expecting. Sakura grinned as his spinning tomoes disappeared as he was temporarily blinded and she wasted no time in swinging another chakra-laden fist. Her fist met his face and she felt the satisfying crunch of breaking bone before he was able to dart away.

He faced her a little more warily, Sakura clenching her fist, smile pasted on her face to hide her fear. “What’s wrong, Sasuke-kun? Did that hurt?” she goaded him with a smirk.

Sasuke eyed her fists with a contemplative expression. “You’re not as useless,” he said softly, the words somewhat garbled as his face swelled. She’d broken his cheekbone at least. “It doesn’t matter,” he declared more clearly. “You’ll be dead either way.”

“Cha!” Sakura snarled. “Like I’d let you kill me.”

Her heart froze as Sasuke appeared in front of her with a twisted expression, chidori aimed at her chest. “Who said you had a choice?”

His arm swung forward and Sakura gathered her chakra, knowing it wouldn’t be enough. She didn’t have time to think about regrets, eyes meeting Sasuke’s in a final defiance. She felt him before she saw the flash of white and red cloak, and familiar silver hair. Sakura’s heart leapt, and she jumped back as Kakashi hit Sasuke’s arm and redirected the hit harmlessly before dodging Sasuke’s kick and using his momentum to kick Sasuke away from Sakura.

Kakashi’s hand reached for Sakura’s and she gripped it desperately, even as his focus remained on the threat in front of them.

Sasuke sneered at them both. “You keep appearing, one after the other.”

Sakura shivered at the madness she glimpsed in his eyes. She felt Kakashi wince at her punishing grip, easing her hand open and turning towards Kakashi to apologize, but her mouth closed at the intent look in his eyes.

XX

Kakashi kept his eyes on Sasuke, but ignored his words for the moment and spoke to Sakura. “You tried to kill him by yourself, didn’t you Sakura?” He squeezed her hand before letting it go. “You don’t have to shoulder such a heavy burden alone Sakura. Even if you couldn’t tell Naruto, I will always be here.”

“Kakashi-“

“No, this was my fault. This was my own weakness at fault. I was the leader of Team 7, and I was careless with your training. I’m sorry I was such a careless sensei.”

“You’re not!” Sakura insisted, tears leaking from her eyes at the conviction in Kakashi’s voice. “Kakashi, this isn’t your fault.”

“Kakashi?” Sasuke questioned in disbelief. “How has our careless sensei become so familiar with you Sakura?”

Kakashi snarled as Sasuke’s attention remained focused on Sakura. “Sasuke! I told you once, and I don’t like to repeat myself. Do not become possessed by vengeance!”

Sasuke threw his head back, eyes closing as he started laughing in disbelief. Kakashi watched impassively, waiting to see what Sasuke’s next move was.

“Itachi…my mom…my dad…my clan, bring them back to me and I’ll quit!” Sasuke demanded.

He’s been twisted completely by Madara, Kakashi realized.

“Sakura,” Kakashi said calmly. “Take that shinobi away from here and heal her enough that she can talk. She must have useful intel on the enemy.”

“Kakashi?” Sakura looked towards Sasuke with apprehension.

“I will take on what would have been your burden,” Kakashi looked towards her with his typical smile, doing his best to reassure her. “I guess you could say this is my responsibility.”

“I don’t want you hurt, Kakashi,” Sakura said softly. “I couldn’t bear it again if you…”

“I won’t leave you again, Sakura.”

“What is this, Kakashi? Sakura? Such tender words shared between a sensei and his favorite student. I thought you loved me Sakura?”

Sakura shuddered at the insanity she glimpsed in his eyes. “I never loved you.” She stated, bending down to pick up the woman.

“One more thing you’ve taken away from me, Kakashi.” Sasuke laughed bitterly. “Telling me to stop my revenge. Stop acting like my sensei.” He smirked, head tilting as he contemplated the silver-haired Jounin. “I’m itching to kill you, Kakashi.”

“Go, Sakura.” Kakashi commanded, eager for her to be far away from Sasuke.

“Stay safe,” Sakura demanded before disappearing with the shinobi over her shoulder.

Kakashi was hard-pressed during their fight against Sasuke’s intense thirst for revenge. His taunts struck home, as Sasuke ranted about his borrowed Sharingan and showed him the power achieved by one who was born with it, versus one who’d been gifted it through blood and loss. Kakashi was having trouble keeping up and knew he would lose when Sasuke brought forth his Susanoo form, his Mangekyo barely fast enough to blow away Sasuke’s attack. He tried one more time to convince Sasuke to leave his current path.

“Sasuke, you are more than your clan. You are more than hatred. Please, look inside your heart one more time.”

“You’re all laughing!” Sasuke accused, ignoring Kakashi’s plea. “Laughing at the cost of Itachi’s life!” Sasuke readied his Susanoo’s attack, “I will change those laughs to screams and wails!”

Kakashi noticed Sakura racing towards Sasuke from behind and he started running towards Sasuke, panicked, even as Sasuke’s Susanoo began to waver.

Sakura, don’t!

He watched in horror as Sakura seemed to hesitate, her kunai puncturing Sasuke’s back with a fraction of the force needed to deal a fatal blow. “Sakura!” he yelled in warning as Sasuke grunted in pain, spinning towards Sakura. She held the kunai limply and gasped as Sasuke’s fist closed around her neck. Kakashi was too slow, his Mangekyo draining him close to the point of chakra exhaustion. Horror filled him as he was forced to watch Sasuke attempt to choke the life out of his once teammate.

Please, he begged any higher power that could intervene. Please don’t take Sakura. “Stop, Sasuke!”

Sasuke ripped the kunai from Sakura’s grip and Kakashi pushed himself harder to reach her as the kunai arced towards Sakura. There was a flash of orange and yellow, the impact of the kunai diverted as Naruto grabbed Sakura and jumped away.

Kakashi spared a moment to ensure Sakura was safe before he turned against Sasuke with a rage he’d never known before. Twice, Sasuke had tried to kill Sakura. And this time Kakashi had been present and still powerless to stop it. He raced after Sasuke, throwing kicks and punches in a blind fury, not caring he was countered at every turn, seeing only the fear and shock in Sakura’s eyes, the acceptance of her death.

When Sasuke threw him, his only thought was to beat him back down to the ground, to the people who were the most precious to him. He barely made it, jumping in front of Naruto and a shaken Sakura with a determined scowl, his eyes narrowing on Sasuke’s cold expression. There could be only one way for this to end. And if he died again, he hoped Sakura could forgive him.

XX

Sakura couldn’t believe she’d stabbed Sasuke. Her stomach twisted in a cocktail of guilt and determination and she felt suddenly exhausted, watching Kakashi face off with Sasuke with a detachment she couldn’t shake away. She’d tried to kill Sasuke, but she’d failed. Kakashi and Naruto had been forced to save her once again, despite her training and resolve. And still, the guilt gnawed at her, reminding her that Sasuke was also a part of Team 7. Sasuke was also family. But he’d tried to kill her and nearly succeeded. She couldn’t decide if she wanted Sasuke to die or not, and she hated herself for it.

Naruto attacked Sasuke before she could blink and she opened her mouth to cry out for him. She watched their attacks meet with bated breath, wincing at the violent explosion as Naruto’s Rasengan met Sasuke’s Chidori. She watched as Naruto and Sasuke spoke as if no one else was there. As more people appeared to take Sasuke away and Naruto approached him with a calmness she rarely saw from him.

“If you attack Konoha, we will be forced to fight. Aim your hatred at me. I’m the only one who can bear it.” Naruto spoke with a conviction that scared Sakura. “I will bear the burden of that hatred and we will die together,” he promised Sasuke.

Sasuke was taken away, Naruto’s words ringing loudly in her ears. We will die together. Sakura’s fist clenched as she promised herself she would prove Naruto wrong. She met Kakashi’s eyes and saw her vow echoed in his. They nodded to each other in agreement. Naruto would survive, no matter what.

She felt exhaustion overwhelming her, reaching for Kakashi as her vision wavered. He caught her in his arms and pulled her close. Sakura breathed in the scent of her soulmate, all her turmoil softened by his tight embrace. She could do anything with him by her side, even a task that seemed impossible now. “I love you, Kakashi.”

Kakashi stroked her hair and pressed a masked kiss against her brow. “I love you too,” he murmured softly. “But we’ll talk about your suicidal tendencies later.”

“I never wanted to die,” Sakura huffed in annoyance.

“And yet, your life has been threatened again and you put yourself in danger. If my hair wasn’t already grey Sakura, it would turn so overnight.”

Sakura rolled her eyes against Kakashi’s shoulder, relieved that he didn’t seem truly angry with her, only concerned. “Says the man who almost died by the Susanoo.”

Kakashi pulled away from her and waited until her eyes met his. “I promise to always do my best to return to you, no matter what, if you promise me the same.”

“Done,” Sakura agreed easily, the tightness of her chest easing. When Kakashi made a promise, only death would break it, and perhaps not even then. She encircled her arms around Kakashi’s neck, pulling his face to hers and kissing his clothed lips softly.

“Hey!” Naruto protested with feigned outrage. “I don’t want to see that!”

Sakura turned towards Naruto, leaning into Kakashi as his arm wrapped around her waist in support. “Thanks, Naruto.”

Naruto winced, face darkening at the reminder of what Sasuke had tried to do. “It was nothing.”

“It was everything,” Kakashi corrected, still haunted by Sakura’s near miss.

Naruto shrugged off Kakashi’s gratitude, turning away so they didn’t see the tears he wiped away with his arm. “I’m hungry. Do you think we can make it back before Ichiraku closes?”

Sakura went with the ill-timed change of topic, eager to move on from Sasuke. “If we hurry.”

“Well, what are we standing around for?” And Naruto was off before either of them could react.

Sakura looked at Kakashi and rolled her eyes. “Should we follow him?”

Kakashi shook his head. “I think we should grab what you left behind, first. Naruto will follow when he realizes we’re not behind him.”

Sakura blanched, remembering that Sai, Kiba, and Lee were still sleeping on the side of the road where she’d left them.

“And we should grab Sasuke’s accomplice too.”

XX

Kakashi was glad that Sakura seemed to be coping fine with what happened with Sasuke. He wanted to berate her about putting her life in danger, but he was conflicted, remembering belatedly that he was soon to be the Hokage. Should he reprimand her as the Hokage or as her soulmate? How would Sakura feel about the news?

Naruto caught up quickly, grumbling about how tired he was. His brief time away seemed to restore him to his usual self. Kakashi was happy to see the loss of the stern, quiet Naruto, and to have fulfilled his self-promise to let Naruto face Sasuke and attempt to deter him his own way. Naruto truly seemed in better spirits, like a burden had been lifted from his shoulders now that he’d made a decision. It was a decision Kakashi and Sakura would prevent from occurring, but if it eased Naruto’s pain, Kakashi was all for it.

After the three were woken up, Kakashi was reminded yet again of his future position as Hokage, as Sai brought it up so abruptly to the masked members of the Anbu Black Ops who appeared out of nowhere to confirm the news of Danzo’s death. He felt Naruto tense beside him, the small noise he made making it clear Kakashi’s promotion had slipped his mind. Kakashi didn’t dare look to see Sakura’s reaction, tensing as the Anbu members jumped into the trees.

She rounded on him immediately, her voice incredulous. “You’re going to be Hokage? When were you planning on telling me?”

“It seems to be that way,” Kakashi smiled placatingly. “I was going to tell you.” Later, his eyes pleaded with her.

 Sakura took in the boys watching her with apprehension, forcing herself to relax before she did something reckless, like punch the pleading expression off Kakashi’s face. “Fine,” she grumbled, turning away from Kakashi with dread. Hokage. “Let’s head home then.”

There was no argument from anyone and they set off quietly to the village, everyone tired, and Sakura troubled by the news of Kakashi’s promotion.

What did that mean for them?

Chapter Text

Kakashi didn’t want to be Hokage. He’d served his village for years without complaint. He’d taken practically no vacation time. He’d had no long-term relationships, no reason to leave the village for extended periods of time unless it was for a mission. He’d served the Hokage in Anbu and put his life on the line hundreds of times for the sake of Konoha. He was 31 years old and held the respect and gratitude of the villagers and his fellow shinobi. It had been enough to know that he’d willingly give up his life to protect his home and that his purpose was served. Now…Kakashi sighed. Now there was Sakura. Now, there was a chance at something more than his duty to Konoha, a chance at living for himself rather than everyone else.

Kakashi had been avoiding Gai for weeks, unsure what he wanted to say to him. He understood Gai’s point of view. To anyone observing his and Sakura’s relationship from the outside, it looked wrong. Maybe it was wrong. There was no rule that you had to end up with your soulmate, but he’d chosen not to forsake his and Sakura had chosen him in return. He was done denying their relationship, but that left a difficult discussion ahead with Gai. He’d known him for years, considered him his best friend and cherished their relationship, though he would never tell the man in so many words. Now their friendship was in danger of falling apart but Kakashi wasn’t willing to compromise anymore.

Their nation was on the verge of war and needed a strong leader to hold them together. Kakashi could be that leader for his home, would serve his village as faithfully as he’d served it all his life. But only if the village accepted his relationship with Sakura in turn. Konoha didn’t need dissension, now more than ever, it needed hope and unity. His hope was tied with Sakura. He’d given his heart to Konoha, and now it was time that they relinquished it to Sakura. If that meant he needed to step down before he even took on the mantle of Hokage, then so be it.

He came to this decision on their run home to Konoha, thoughts racing and options considered and discarded. What was best for Konoha, might not be best for Sakura. What was best for Kakashi could plummet the village into chaos and disorder. Duty and honor, fate and choice. Other shinobi had placed their duty above everything, including their own lives. Itachi, Obito, Rin, even Naruto was willing to give up his life alongside Sasuke’s for the good of the village when he had Hinata waiting for him at home. Was Kakashi more similar to his father than he’d thought? His father, who’d died inside when Kakashi’s mother had passed away. Who’d made the morally right decision, if not the best decision for the village when he chose to save teammates that later ostracized him. A life served to a village that turned on him in the end. The same for Itachi, and if Rin had not sacrificed herself, the same might have been said for her, just as Naruto suffered resentment all his life.

Duty and honor, fate and choice. What was the right decision? When Sakura looked back at him with a broken expression, resignation written in her eyes, he knew the decision he should make, the decision she expected him to make. But it wasn’t the one he would be making. ‘I love you,’ he mouthed at her. Her small smile was little consolation, but she mouthed the words back readily and he felt a considerable weight lift off his shoulders. Not the decision he should make, but the only decision he could live with in the end.

XX

They stopped for a rest halfway to Konoha, and Kakashi took that time to send his ninken out to the other villages to start gathering intel and coordinating for the Allied Front they were hoping to put together to face Madara. While he was gone, the others sat idly, too tense to really take the rest they should.

“What do you think Kakashi-sensei is doing?” Naruto wondered.

“Likely communicating with the other Kages,” Sakura said dejectedly. As was his duty as the future Hokage. A duty that would pull him further away from her side. “We need to share intel quickly.”

“Mmm,” Naruto barely acknowledged her response, his mind clearly focused on other things.

Must be thinking of Sasuke, Sakura thought. And maybe her mind would be on their disastrous reunion if she wasn’t caught up on Kakashi becoming Hokage. It wasn’t something she’d ever expected to happen. Tsunade was supposed to be Hokage for the next several years, until Naruto was ready to take over the mantle himself. Kakashi was supposed to be hers. A tear fell down her face and she sniffled, grimacing at her self-pity. She’d always been selfish when it came to love. Hadn’t her years fawning over Sasuke taught her anything?

“It will be okay, Sakura.” Naruto wrapped an arm around her shoulder and leaned her against his side.

Any other time she might have punched his face for daring to touch her, but she settled against him with another sniffle. Kakashi’s hand settled on her head when he came back, stroking her hair and offering comfort the only way he felt was appropriate in front of their audience. His hand was warm and welcome, but it wasn’t enough. Not when she felt their future together slipping further and further away even as she stretched her fingers to grasp it. She wrapped her hand around his and tugged it down to her lips rebelliously. He stared down at her with intense focus, but he didn’t resist as she pulled his gloved hand to her lips and kissed the tips of his bare fingers. She ignored the strangled gasp from Kiba or the intrigued exclamation heard from the shinobi they’d captured. She didn’t care anymore about what anyone thought. If this was to be their last moments shared as lovers, rather than comrades, she would take full advantage.  Kakashi responded by cupping her cheek in his hand and stroking his thumb across her lips.

“We need to get to the village,” he said softly, bending down low and pressing a clothed kiss to her forehead. “I’ll carry the shinobi,” Kakashi stated when he stood to his full height.

He led the way to Konoha, ignoring the questioning stares he felt burning into his back. There was no point explaining anything about his relationship with Sakura. All would be revealed soon enough.

XX

When they approached the village, Karin holding weakly to Kakashi’s back, they were greeted by the members of Team 10 and the boisterous grandson of the Third and his friends. Naruto deflected their pleas and asked Shikamaru to get the other Teams together so he could speak to him. He looked towards Sakura with a questioning frown and she nodded that she would meet him so he preceded them into the village. Kakashi handed off Karin to Kiba for a moment, facing Sakura with his most cheerful smile.

“Mah Sakura, it breaks my heart to see you so sad.” He pulled her close, ignoring the bulging eyes of Team 10 as he embraced her tightly. Her arms came around his waist immediately and she buried her face against his chest.

“What are you doing?” she said into his vest, but clung even harder when he tried to pull away slightly.

Kakashi mirrored his earlier actions, cupping her cheek and lifting her face up so he could look into her eyes. “I’m making a choice.” He stated firmly. His face lowered to hers slowly, giving her the chance to pull away and decline him. This was his choice after all, and she had the right to make her own. He didn’t need to worry though, as Sakura made her choice readily known by throwing her arms around his neck and pressing her lips against his fervently. She pressed kisses against his lips, his chin, the exposed skin above his mask, anywhere she could reach. Her fingers slipped under his mask, ready to pull it down so she could kiss him fully, but he gripped her fingers gently and pulled them away. Kakashi kissed her fingers before pressing her arms to her side and stepping back.

“I love you Sakura,” he told her with his trademark smile. “I won’t hide it any longer and I can’t be the Hokage if the village can’t accept that.”

“Kakashi…” Sakura was stunned, her eyes wide and mouth parted. “But who would step up in your place?”

“If they can’t accept that,” Kakashi shrugged. “Then someone else will. Someone has to, and I will if I must, but not if I can’t acknowledge my soulmate and have her by my side.”

Tears fell from Sakura’s eyes, but she smiled so brightly that he knew she wasn’t sad. “I love you so much,” she declared. “And I promise to always remain at your side.”

Kakashi finally took notice of the group of people gaping at them openly, though the younger ones looked more disgusted by the public display more than surprised. Udon even had the foresight to take a picture of the moment, wondering if it would make it into their next issue. The future Hokage gets a girlfriend! He was sure people would be thrilled to read it.

“Go find Naruto,” Kakashi urged Sakura, pulling her in for a last chaste kiss. “Tell the other Teams to prepare for war. I’ll take her to Ibiki and the Intel division so we can find out everything she knows. And then I must meet with the village elders.”

“I’ll meet with you later,” Sakura promised, running past Team 10 to find where Naruto went.

Kakashi took Karin from a speechless Kiba and went his own way to drop her off to be interrogated.

XX

Kakashi kept his report to Ibiki brief, revealing what little he knew about Karin and her involvement, watching impassively as she was led away. Ibiki promised to find out everything she’d witness while involved with the Akatsuki and Kakashi asked about Tsunade, hoping that his appointment as Hokage could be avoided entirely, only to be disappointed and saddened by the news that she remained unconscious.

“I’ll make my report to the superiors,” Kakashi said. “Excuse me.”

“Kakashi,” Ibiki’s voice halted Kakashi’s departure and he turned back in query. “The chain of command in Konoha is in shambles. Someone has to restore order as soon as possible.” His pointed look made it clear who Ibiki expected that someone to be.

Kakashi’s response was noncommittal. “Yeah, someone does.”

The village elders were aghast at the news of Danzo’s untimely death by Sasuke’s hands. “We need to quickly hold a meeting and decide on the next Hokage,” Koharu, a member of the council and former member of Team Tobirama said heavily.

“The Allied Forces negotiations will be stalled without a Hokage,” her former teammate Homura agreed.

“That can’t be helped.” She stared sharply at Kakashi. “We will recommend you to be the next Hokage. The Kazekage has also recommended you.”

Kakashi nodded his agreement. “I am prepared for it.”

Homura’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “That was…easy.”

“Of course it would be out of character for me to be Hokage.” Kakashi ventured carefully. “And I am prepared for it, with conditions.”

“And what conditions do you have to serve your village?” Koharu demanded angrily.

“My soulmate is Sakura Haruno.” Kakashi said quickly.

“Your former student?” Homura frowned. “Disappointing.”

“Yes,” Kakashi confirmed. “I will not deny our bond if I am Hokage, and we intend to be open about it going forward. I understand if you must choose someone else to lead the village.”

Homura and Koharu looked at each other, conferring silently. “She is of age,” Koharu finally said. “And a strong shinobi in her own right as a student under Tsunade. If they were to have children…” The two nodded in agreement, decision made.

“You may have to step down after the war is over, or face consequences for the breach of conduct if the village does not agree with your relationship,” Homura cautioned, “but for the war we need a united front, so we will not fight you on this matter.”

“Go back to the village and prepare until we call you,” Koharu commanded, dismissing him.

Kakashi nodded, not surprised that they’d chosen to accept his relationship with Sakura without argument. They were used to making sacrifices for the greater good, used to covering up the shadier practices of ruling a nation. They had fully supported Danzo despite knowing the atrocities he’d committed in the name of their village. A relationship with an adult several years younger than him, even a former student, was nothing in comparison. Simply another scandal to be dealt with later, when war wasn’t looming at their door. It was the best he could hope for.

XX

The other teams gathered together to discuss Sasuke, and the events that had occurred due to his actions. Naruto explained nothing clearly, and was vague about his plans to face Sasuke again. Frustration was high when Naruto refused to answer any questions clearly. Sakura’s fist clenched as Naruto ignored even Hinata’s worried expression, blowing them all and leaving abruptly.

“I’m sorry Hinata,” Sakura squeezed her shoulder. “It’s been a rough day for all of us. I’m sure he’ll speak to you if you want him to.”

“It’s okay,” Hinata said sadly. “I understand how much Sasuke means to you both. Naruto only just agreed to date me. He doesn’t even know we’re soulmates yet.”

Up to this point Kiba was practically vibrating with suppressed energy and he finally burst. “Speaking of soulmates. WhenwereyougoingtotellusKakashisenseiwasyoursoulmateSakura?”

“Yeah!” Ino demanded sullenly. “I get why you didn’t tell that loudmouth, but you didn’t tell me, your best friend? What gives forehead!”

“Kakashi-sensei is your soulmate?” Tenten screeched.

Sakura looked towards the road where Naruto had retreated to with a forlorn expression. With Kakashi’s unexpected behaviour, of course it was going to come out. But she was tired, and she really didn’t want to deal with this now. She wanted to find Kakashi and go to sleep for the next 12 hours at least. “Yes, Kakashi is my soulmate.” She confirmed. “We’ve known forever, and we’ve tried to deny it forever,” Sakura shrugged. “Maybe it’s a matter of fate, but for me it was a choice. I love him, and he loves me. That’s all that matters.” She held up a clenched fist as a threat when multiple people started speaking over each other with questions. “That’s all I’m going to say about it right now. I want to go home and rest. Today hasn’t been the greatest day.”

She ignored their chattering and walked away, hoping to run into Kakashi on her way home if he was done with the elders.

XX

Kakashi considered whether Sakura would be at her apartment or his, or if he should be looking for her around the village. He really needed to hold her, and reassure himself that she was safe and sound. Everything had happened so quickly that he hadn’t had the time to process her near-death at Sasuke’s hands. His emotions surrounding Sasuke were clouded and he chose to push even the thought of him away to be dealt with later, or maybe not at all. For now, he would focus on Sakura and let her know that he would become the Hokage with her openly as his soulmate.

He'd also been avoiding the thought of Gai, and their last conversation, and the conversation they would need to have if he wanted to continue their friendship, which he did. Gai might be overexuberant, emotional, and an overachiever, but he was also Kakashi’s best friend. It felt wrong to hold such opposing ideals.

As he walked through the village, Kakashi looked around and marveled at the amount of buildings that had already been constructed in the aftermath of Pein’s attack. He paused at the railing overlooking the center of the village and looked towards the stone visages of the previous Hokage before him, his gaze resting wistfully on the Fourth.

“Sensei, they say I’m going to be the next Hokage.”

His thoughts were interrupted by a palm on his back that shoved him forward, before an arm wrapped around him and yanked him back from the railing. “Yo, Kakashi! Looks like you made it safely home,” Gai grabbed his shoulders and forcefully turned him around. He started inspecting Kakashi for injuries, patting his arms, ruffling his hair, grabbing his foot and wiggling his ankle to check his mobility. “You’re okay? You weren’t hurt?”

“Oh, I’m fine,” Kakashi assured him.

“Ohh, in that case!” Gai grinned widely and stuck his thumb up exuberantly. “How about we have a match, right now?”

Kakashi tilted his head, considering Gai warily. Weren’t they fighting? Wasn’t Gai upset with him? “Why?”

Gai looked scandalized. “Why? Why?! Because we are eternal rivals! We’ve had over a hundred matches. Let’s have another!”

“Okay,” Kakashi agreed easily, relieved that at least this hadn’t changed. He got into their usual stance, jutting his butt out and elbows bent, fists clenched just above either side of his head. Gai matched him and they started wiggling their hips in unison, chanting as they did so. “Rock, paper, scissors…”

Gai interrupted the ritual abruptly, pointing his finger aggressively past Kakashi at the Hokage that Kakashi had been looking at moments earlier. “No! I don’t want rock, paper, scissors!” Kakashi stared at him, with his fist poised in the “rock” position. “Our challenge, will be that! I set a goal at the top. I want to race there from the village gates.”

Kakashi looked between the mountain and Gai with hesitation. “Now isn’t really the time.”

“That’s exactly why I want to have a hot challenge! You’ll accept, won’t you my eternal rival?”

At Gai’s pleading look, Kakashi nodded decisively, letting out a small laugh of relief that this would remain the same despite everything. “I guess you’re right. No time like the present.”

“Alright! Let’s do it!” Gai shouted enthusiastically.

The race was messy. Two crazy shinobi running down a slope at full speed, throwing whatever objects they could find at each other. Pots, pans, Ichi Ichi, a broom, all in an attempt to distract each other and gain the upper hand. Kakashi’s heart lightened even as he pushed himself harder to gain even an inch on Gai. They raced past their students, Kakashi almost losing focus when he caught Sakura’s scent, but he kept running. Through the village, across rooftops, sliding under carts, running sideways along walls, disrupting civilians and shinobi alike with their antics. Finally up the mountain to the finish line. Kakashi spotted Lee waiting for them at a makeshift goal, white cloth tied across for them to run into. He pushed himself even harder in the last seconds, both Gai and him pushing their chests forward in an attempt to cross the finish line first.

They skid to a stop, eyes flying to their referee of the race, a tearful Lee. “Kakashi-sensei…is the winner!”

“That was a pretty good challenge,” Kakashi admitted with a smile. He flinched as a boquet of flowers wrapped in pink foil were abruptly shoved into his face by a pouting Gai.

“Congratulations.”

“Oh,” Kakashi rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. “This is nothing to be congratulated for.”

Gai shook his head. “Congratulations on becoming Hokage.” At Kakashi’s taken aback expression, he continued, “When you become Hokage, it won’t be so easy to challenge you. That’s why I wanted to challenge you this last time.” He shoved the bouquet into Kakashi’s arms. “Thank you Kakashi.”

Kakashi accepted the flowers with a smile. “This won’t be the last challenge, Gai. We’ll always be eternal rivals.” At Gai’s surprised exclamation he continued, needing to get the words out while he was still able to explain. “Seriously Gai, I find it reassuring having you here. I hope I can count on your continued support.”

He expected the loud sobs that erupted from Gai and Lee, and grabbed onto Gai and pulled him away from his crying student. Gai felt the gravity of whatever Kakashi wanted to say, and his sobs quieted to streaming tears as he waited for his best friend to speak. “I wanted to say, I know that you don’t agree with my relationship with Sakura.” He raised a hand to interrupt whatever Gai was going to say. “I understand how you feel. I really do, but I was honest with the council elders. I won’t let anyone separate us anymore. Not even you. No matter how much I respect your opinion as my eternal rival…and my best friend.”

Gai’s eyes continued streaming water, and he yanked Kakashi into a crushing hug. “Ka-kakashi! I was wrong to try and separate a couple so deeply in love! Please forgive me! If you and Sakura are truly happy, I cannot hope to deny my best friend true love and eternal happiness!”

His remorseful tears soaked Kakashi’s vest, but the relief that he was feeling to have his best friend’s support was worth all the salty, soaked vests in the world. He patted Gai’s back before gently pushing him away. “Thank you, Gai. I couldn’t do this alone. Truly.”

Gai nodded in acknowledgement, tears disappearing in an instant.

“I have to find Sakura,” Kakashi waved goodbye towards Lee, and raced off to his apartment.

Gai watched him leave with a serious expression. Lee walked up to stand next to him, watching Kakashi’s departure as well. “I guess it’s not easy being Hokage.” Lee commented.

Gai grunted in agreement. “I guess I’ve been one-upped by my eternal rival.” He looked towards the sky in contemplation. “I wonder what’s beyond Hokage?”

XX

After running into the stone carver who insisted on taking measurements of his face, Kakashi finally made it back to his apartment when dusk was beginning to fall. He approached the door with anticipation, the smell of food cooking and the sound of Sakura’s off-key singing welcoming him inside.

Sakura turned from the kitchen counter at his arrival, beaming at him while wearing his pancake apron. “Welcome home, Kakashi!” She twirled with his apron on. “I hope you don’t mind that I wore your pancake apron.”

Kakashi rushed towards her, pulling down his mask as he went and pressing his mouth against hers in desperate relief. Her lips parted, tongue darting into his mouth eagerly. He pressed kiss after kiss against her lips as he turned her and guided her to the counter, lifting her with ease and setting her down. He settled between her legs, and felt her tense. He pulled away, resting his forehead against hers and trying to calm himself.

“I missed you,” he told her. “A lot.”

Sakura’s rosy lips curved up in an amused smile. “Really? I couldn’t tell.”

“Can you just stay here forever?” he requested, only half-joking.

Sakura’s pink cheeks and bashful smile told him that she was aware that he was somewhat serious. “I signed a lease for my apartment. The term isn’t over yet.”

“I guess I’ll have to wait to ask again,” Kakashi said easily. He distracted her with more kisses, his lips moving from her mouth to her chin, trailing along her jaw and sucking gently on the lobe of her ear. She giggled, jerking in his arms and his lips moved on, continuing the trail down her neck, which she arched so prettily for him, resting briefly in the hollow of her throat before he was tugging the collar of her sleep shirt aside and nibbling along her collarbone. He had no set plan on how far they would go, willing to stop whenever Sakura reached the end of her comfort zone, despite his urge to pick her up and carry her to bed. Unfortunately, he never got the chance to find out. The smoke alarm was set off by whatever started smoking on the stove top and Sakura shoved against him in a panic.

“The food!” Kakashi pulled away from her reluctantly and let her jump down to check the food. Sakura berated him for distracting her and he pouted at her, before she was shooing him towards the sofa. “Go away for now. I can’t cook when you’re being so distracting.”

His pout deepened, and he winced as he sat down and his pants pressed against his painful erection. The poor guy had been neglected for years. He willed it away as he asked Sakura how the talk with the other teams went. The mood immediately sobered, and he listened intently as she explained what had occurred, as well as what she’d told the others about their relationship.

“How was your meeting with the village elders?” Sakura asked anxiously.

“I told them you were my soulmate and I wasn’t willing to compromise our relationship to become Hokage.”

“And they were okay with that?” Sakura asked in amazement. “Was it really that easy this whole time?”

“They said there may be consequences after the war is over,” Kakashi cautioned. “But yes, our relationship doesn’t endanger the village so they were willing to let it go.” He didn’t mention their implication of kids. Sakura had already seemed nervous about his suggestion she move in. He didn’t want her to run away entirely.

“That’s good,” Sakura sighed in relief. She started moving pots and pans off the heat, and turned off burners. “Our food is a little burnt, but I think it’s edible.”

“Edible is an improvement over soldier pills,” Kakashi commented honestly.

“Anything is an improvement over soldier pills,” Sakura agreed.

An urgent knock on the door had them both tensing. Kakashi tugged his mask back over his lower face. Sakura immediately pulled the apron off and hung it up, running towards his room in a panic. He waited until she was hidden from view before opening up the door.

“We have some urgent news,” an Anbu mask greeted him at the door. “Tsunade-sama is awake.”

Sakura came skidding out of his room at the news, oblivious to the way the Anbu shinobi tensed in surprise at her appearance, wearing nothing but a baggy shirt and shorts no less. “Shishou is awake?” she demanded of him. “Is she okay? Can we see her?”

The Anbu looked towards Kakashi and he nodded firmly. “Take us to her.”

They followed the Anbu shinobi out the door, Kakashi taking off his vest and handing it to Sakura, who hadn’t thought to change into anything else. Not that he could blame her. Her mentor was awake. Which meant the day’s events were for naught. If Tsunade was alive and well, his short tenure as Hokage was over before it even began.

I’m glad that’s over. Kakashi mused. I hope Tsunade doesn’t kill me when she sees what Sakura’s wearing.

Chapter Text

“Shizune, you’re hurting me,” Tsunade said softly to the sobbing woman that was clutching at her so desperately. After Shizune pulled away, still crying piteously, Tsunade gestured towards the other people in the room. “I need food. My chakra reserves are almost empty. Bring me whatever is in the Hokage stores immediately.” As a couple people disappeared to fulfill her command, Tsunade turned back to Shizune, patting her head in consolation.

What’s been happening since I was unconscious? Where is Sakura? Tsunade set aside her concerns for the moment as a table was brought into the room and set down in preparation of her meal. She let Shizune help her to a sitting position and waited impatiently for her food. She hated how weak she felt, and her seal barely had any chakra. Her chakra reserves were almost empty. Soon she would look exactly her age and it disturbed her. Her appearance was a matter of pride, a shield against the contempt of the world.

“Where is Sakura? Who is in charge?”

“Sakura returned today from a mission. The village is in turmoil. Danzo stood to take your place as Hokage, but he was assassinated by Sasuke Uchiha. Kakashi was only confirmed to be next in line a short time ago.”

“And the brat agreed?” Tsunade scoffed in disbelief.

Shizune looked away in discomfort. “It was said he did…with conditions.”

“Conditions? The audacity of him! Good for him,” Tsunade commented. “What were those?”

They were interrupted by the arrival of food and Tsunade’s attention was immediately turned to eating. Shizune sighed in relief, hoping that Sakura or Kakashi would be informed before the matter of his conditions was brought up again. In truth, Shizune was a little scandalized by what was being discussed around the village. Kakashi and Sakura? She understood the pull of soulmates, but she felt a little reserved by the timing of it all and the impact it would potentially have on the village, and Tsunade’s recovery. Tsunade was fiercely proud of Sakura after all. But Kakashi was 14 years older than Sakura, her former sensei, her team leader. How long had their relationship been going on? The thought of it left Shizune feeling very disturbed. A soulmate was a soulmate, but at what point did the heavens go too far?

“Fill me in on what’s been happening in the village,” Tsunade muttered between mouthfuls.

XX

Kakashi and Sakura entered the room together, which was immediately vacated by the other medical personnel, leaving only the two of them, Tsunade scarfing down food, and a reserved Shizune in the room, as the Anbu operatives closed the door tightly behind them.

Shizune approached the door, maneuvering around Kakashi and Sakura and avoiding making eye contact with either of them. “Kakashi-san, Sakura,” she briefly acknowledged them.

Sakura flushed, made aware just by Shizune’s reserved greeting that the conditions that Kakashi had set to take the role of Hokage had already become known, at least to the upper administration of the village. She pushed down the urge to duck her head and instead lifted her chin in defiance, stepping closer to Kakashi in solidarity.

“Shizune,” Kakashi nodded at her briefly, oblivious or completely ignoring her reaction to the two of them. Instead, his attention was focused on Tsunade, who was distracted from the tension in the room by the food she was shoveling into her mouth.

Shizune froze at his greeting, torn between wanting to confront him for corrupting Sakura, and congratulating a man she’d truly admired on finding his soulmate.

“It’s good to see you well,” Kakashi told Tsunade, eyeing the numerous stacks of empty bowls and plates cluttered on the table in front of her.

“This is nothing,” Tsunade dismissed. “I’m just getting started.”

“I’m relieved,” Kakashi admitted solemnly. “I was dangerously close to becoming Hokage. But I’m not really Hokage material,” he admitted easily. “And in the situation we find ourselves in, we need someone like you.”

“Speaking of that,” Tsunade’s gaze sharpened on Kakashi and Sakura. “I’ve heard there were certain conditions to you accepting the position. I would like to hear what those conditions were.”

Shizune squeaked, alarm unfreezing her limbs. She bowed quickly to the room at large and escaped through the door, shutting it firmly behind her.

“Shizune’s reaction to the two of you in particular has me concerned.”

“It’s good to see you Shishou,” Sakura finally spoke, rushing forward to hug Tsunade briefly.

“Don’t try to distract me, Sakura.” Tsunade commanded, but she returned Sakura’s hug. “Now tell me Kakashi,” Tsunade’s gaze pinned him in place. “What were those conditions? And why is my former pupil wearing your vest and very little else?”

Sakura gasped, finally ducking her head and unable to make eye contact and she hurried back to Kakashi’s side. Even then, her hand reached for Kakashi’s and she threaded her fingers through his, needing support and offering it at the same time.

“My condition was simple and nonnegotiable.” Kakashi stated calmly. “I wanted to be able to acknowledge my soulmate openly and have her by my side.”

Tsunade’s face paled and she sat back heavily with an ashen expression. She eyed their clasped hands with a severe expression. “Your soulmate?”

“Shishou,” Sakura said hesitantly.

“Sakura, leave the room.” Tsunade commanded sharply. “I need to have some words with your former sensei.” The last word was said with so much contempt that Kakashi flinched.

Sakura wound her arm around Kakashi’s and she braced herself. “I’m not going anywhere.”

They both recoiled as Tsunade’s chakra expanded threateningly and her eyes burned with fury. “Now isn’t the time to argue with me Sakura. You will listen, or Kakashi won’t be leaving this room intact.”

“Go Sakura,” Kakashi gently pulled her arm from around his. “I promise I’ll be fine.”

Sakura stared at him for an agonizing moment, but she nodded, turning an equally fierce expression towards Tsunade. “I love him. I won’t miss this chance, and I won’t let Kakashi go no matter what,” echoing a promise she’d made to Tsunade when her Shishou was at her lowest.

Kakashi watched her go with his heart in his throat. She loved him. Of course he’d known, but so much secrecy had taken a toll on him. They would face more than Shizune’s censure or Tsunade’s anger in the days ahead by making their marks public knowledge. But she was already showing she would stand with him through it all. “I love you, Sakura.” he told her retreating form, and she offered a tearful smile to him before she closed the door.

“You defiled your own student.” Tsunade accused him with disgust.

“We’ve never had sex,” Kakashi stated firmly. Although was that really a fair argument? If Tsunade had woken any later…

Tsunade’s eyes narrowed angrily. “What does that matter? Sakura is absolutely besotted with you.” She slammed her fist on the table, sending bowls, plates, and splintered wood flying. “She was a child when you met her, Kakashi. Worse than that, she was your student.” Tsunade looked ready to jump up and murder him and he braced himself for her reaction, but all the fight went out of her in an instant, her shoulders slumping in defeat, pain encompassing her features. “And I knew. I denied it to myself, I told myself there was no way you would ever do that. I let Sakura lie to me, but I knew.” She rubbed her face in defeat. “I’m no better than you.”

“I hated myself when I realized she wasn’t just a student to me, or even another rowdy kid I felt like taking care of like Naruto,” Kakashi admitted. “I thought about letting a kunai strike me, about letting my guard down during a mission, about ending it like my father did, or going missing-nin when I realized I couldn’t stay away from her in a village full of people.” He closed his eyes, remembering the way she’d clung to him after Naruto had revived him. Remembering her pain and sorrow and his own regrets when he thought he would never see her again. “Her being my soulmate might just be an excuse, but the pull I feel for her is inescapable. I love her,” Kakashi implored. “Maybe there’s something wrong with me, but I love her and I’m not going to deny it. I’ve spent my whole life denying intimacy and connection, pretending that I didn’t need someone by my side. I’d convinced myself that I would die alone, if only to avoid the pain my father went through and focus on serving Konoha. Sakura was a light in the void of my life. I’ve pushed her away for years and I’m not going to do that any longer. Not for the good opinion of the village, not for you, not even to save my own soul.”

“I can’t condone this,” Tsunade said, shoulders weighed down with the burden of their relationship and the repercussions. “I can’t tell you it’s okay to love her, when I still see her as a child, and as the daughter I’ll never have.”

“I know.” Kakashi nodded. “I don’t expect you to. But don’t hurt Sakura with your words and actions.”

“Give me time,” Tsunade said heavily. “Give the village time.” She closed her eyes in sudden exhaustion. “Registering your soulmarks will help ease the censure you will face. Soulmarks are sacred after all,” She laughed bitterly. “As will having the approval of the village elders, which I’m assuming you already have.”

“I do.”

“Those two are too pragmatic,” Tsunade said darkly, aware of how much Koharu and Homura were willing to overlook or accept in the name of keeping Konoha safe and how much influence they held over the village, the council, and the Daimyo. If those two truly had no problem with Kakashi and Sakura, or even encouraged it, then there was little she could do except appeal to Sakura or falsely declare Kakashi a traitor. No matter how disappointed she was at the confirmation of her suspicions, she didn’t hate Kakashi, and they needed him right now to lead the Allied Forces. Being Hokage meant compartmentalizing and she would need to let this go right now and focus on the most important matters, reminded of what Shizune had told her of everything she’d missed.

“Madara Uchiha,” she contemplated out loud. “Is he really still alive?”

Kakashi seemed unfazed by the abrupt change of topics. “We don’t have absolute proof, but considering what they’re trying to do, I’d say there was no doubt.”

Tsunade inhaled deeply, clearing her mind of everything but the safety of the village. “I will call a meeting immediately after this meal. We must prepare for war!”

XX

Naruto disappeared from Ichiraku as the meeting commenced, though no one but Teuchi, Ayame's father realized it. Sakura was forbidden from attending the meeting. Tsunade didn’t want to create a spectacle when the matter at hand was so serious. It was bad enough that Kakashi was getting side eyes and even direct stares from around the room, although no one seemed openly hostile or particularly upset with him.

“So you’re saying that the Fourth Great Shinobi War is about to start?” Koharu asked warily.

“Even if it is Madara Uchiha, can he even withstand an attack from all five Great nations?” Homura interjected.

“Wake up!” Tsunade shouted in frustration, slamming her open palm on the table. “Madara Uchiha commands the Akatsuki. Just one of their members was able to almost completely destroy Konoha.”

“I agree with Tsunade,” Kakashi voiced. “The Akatsuki already have 7 of the tailed beasts. If they were to use them as military weapons, we must consider them to be much stronger than the previous attack on Konoha.”

“That being the case, the entire world is in danger of ruin. We need to move quickly.” Tsunade insisted.

“Do we even know where Madara is?” Koharu wondered.

“We do have intel on a potential sighting.” Shikaku informed them. “We’re working on getting more intel.”

“We’ve received word of a meeting of the Allied Shinobu Force in three days,” Tsunade said. “We need to prepare in the meantime. I will shortly be making an announcement to the village about the Fourth Great Shinobi War.” She looked around at the grim faces surrounding the table. “This will be a war like we’ve never seen.” Her eyes settled on Kakashi. “Kakashi, you need to make sure and keep an eye on Naruto. I can’t have him acting recklessly. Naruto is the Akatsuki’s goal.”

Kakashi nodded once. “I understand.”

An urgent knock interrupted the meeting and Shizune was ushered in.

“Shizune, what’s happening?”

“Just now Naruto disappeared from Ichiraku.”

“What? Find Naruto immediately!”

XX

Sakura was the one to find Naruto and bring him in front of Tsunade. Kakashi, Shikamaru, Sakura and Tsunade were there to hear Naruto explain what the Great Lord Elder had foretold about his fight with Sasuke, and the mysterious ‘octopus’ that would help him in some way.

Hearing Naruto talk about his inevitable fight with Sasuke had Sakura considering her role in the upcoming war. She was a medic-nin primarily despite her physical strength and her goal would be to save as many people as she could, rather than to focus on fighting on the front lines alongside Naruto and Kakashi. She went to the hospital after their meeting, pressing a quick kiss against Kakashi’s cheek before departing. She ignored Tsunade’s glower at the affectionate gesture and Naruto’s embarrassed guffaw. They would get used to it or they wouldn’t, but she wasn’t going to make that her problem. She at least knew that it was Naruto’s immaturity that was the reason for his squeamishness over her and Kakashi and not any actual issue with their relationship.

She requested one of the older medic-nin tell her everything she could remember about the last war and show her pictures of what she would be facing on the battlefield. She couldn’t remain indifferent to the gory scenes laid out before her in pictures; pictures of amputated limbs, broken bones, lacerations, injuries so deep or wide that organs threatened to spill from them. She almost gagged, and had to turn away.

“Seeing it in person and being expected to tend to these wounds are entirely different to seeing pictures.” The medic-nin cautioned her. “The shinobi of this village put their lives on the line because they expect us to be able to heal them and bring them home.”

“I understand,” Sakura said solemnly. “It’s why I needed to see this.”

It wouldn’t just be random shinobi she would be saving. It would be her friends, her teammates, Naruto and Sasuke when they fought, or Kakashi. She couldn’t afford to hesitate or freeze when it counted. She couldn’t lose Kakashi again and survive that tearing agony of their bond. She refused to sit back and watch Naruto and Sasuke trades blows that would be putting their lives on the line and potentially causing irreparable damage to each other. She had her goals in this war, as they all did.

XX

The next meeting of the five Kages was tense, the anticipation of an attack ripe despite the well-guarded location. It was a frustrating meeting for Tsunade but an overall productive one. Naruto would be sent to be trained by the eight tailed beast wielder Bee. For now, he would be hidden, though Tsunade felt reserved about the decision. As long as he would be given the tools to control Kurama, it would be worth it in the long run, though she felt too many lives may be lost to reach that point.

She called Naruto to the Hokage tower the moment she returned and informed him of his ‘S-rank mission’ to the Hidden Cloud territory, accompanied by Yamato, who would be able to subdue Kurama if the necessity arose. She hated lying to him but it was unavoidable if she wanted to keep him out of the war for any significant period of time. She could only be relieved that he didn’t have the capability to distrust her or be suspicious of her motives. His cheerful boisterous nature was as much of a balm as it was an irritant. He reminded her so much of her brother.

“Umm, can Hinata come too?” Naruto asked before leaving her office.

“Hinata, the Hyuga heiress?” Tsunade asked curiously. Oh, when had she missed this development? At Naruto’s eager nod her eyebrows raised in query. “Why?”

“Because she’s my soulmate obviously!” Naruto proclaimed proudly. “I hear it’s not good to be separated too long from your soulmate, granny. And I don’t know how long this S-rank mission will last.”

Tsunade’s eyebrows almost disappeared into her hairline. “That would be true if you were bonded soulmates. When did you discover she was your soulmate, Naruto?”

“Oh,” Naruto scratched his head in confusion. “Well, I thought about it on the run home, and I realized that Hinata must be my soulmate. I missed her, and I was thinking about her even when I faced Sasuke. I don’t think she knows yet. But we were going on a date when I finished my mission. We’re probably bonded already though. Hinata and I are going to be married when the war’s over.” He looked around hastily and his voice lowered significantly but was still too loud to be considered a whisper. “Don’t tell her father that though. He doesn’t know…yet.”

“You asked Hinata of the Hyuga clan to marry you?” Tsunade pressed her fingers against her temples in an attempt to quell the headache that was already beginning to form at the implications and consequences of Naruto proposing to a clan heir without the clan’s approval.

“Weeelll…not yet?” Naruto grinned sheepishly. “But her father wants her to get married and obviously she can’t marry anyone that isn’t me so I’m going to marry her, as soon as she agrees that is.”

Tsunade resisted the urge to knock him on the top of the head and sighed. “Naruto, you know what it means to be bonded, don’t you?”

“Sure! We’re soulmates and we’re dating I think, and we kissed once and Hinata said she likes me and I like her and-”

“Naruto! A soulmate bond isn’t just an agreement between soulmates. It’s a pact sealed with chakra, a contract signed with a…physical commitment.” She grimaced, trying not to think of Naruto and Hinata in any inappropriate situations.

“Oh,” Naruto looked disappointed. “We didn’t seal anything with chakra. Was the kiss not enough for the physical commitment part? I’ve never really kissed anyone else before, unless you count that one time with Sasuke, which I totally don’t!”

Tsunade shook her head at Naruto’s naivety and innocence and marveled at how the members of Team 7 had turned out so different. She was forcibly suppressing the thought that Kakashi and Sakura may have already sealed their bond in every way, despite Kakashi’s assurances in the negative. Sasuke would likely die alone, if he survived the war, Yamato’s love life was as wooden as his chakra type, Sai was so emotionally stunted that Tsunade couldn’t imagine he was even capable of a romantic thought, and Naruto? If she’d met him today, she would swear she was meeting a child in a young man’s body. Heaven help Hinata. “I will petition the Hyuga clan on your behalf, but do not get your hopes up. If you are not bonded, and they aren’t even aware you’re in a relationship they have no obligation to fulfill my request. They may even attempt to use your time away to convince Hinata that there are better options. An orphaned shinobi with no clan or political influence is not someone they would be eager to marry into their clan.”

“But I’m going to be Hokage one day!” Naruto whined in outrage. “And that means Hinata has to come with me!”

“Naruto!” Tsunade spoke sharply. “Think of what is important. You have a difficult mission ahead of you. Do not let yourself be distracted.”

“Fine,” Naruto said in irritation. “Petition the Hyuga clan if you must, but Hinata is coming with me if she wants to.”

Tsunade sighed again in defeat, a full-blown migraine threatening to split her head open. She dismissed him with a wave and Naruto ran out of the room, likely to find the aforementioned Hinata. “Stubborn brat.”

XX

Hinata was feeling distressed. She hadn’t had a proper conversation with Naruto since his return and she had no idea if he’d even realized it. Even more distressing was wondering if he even cared that they hadn’t seen each other. He’d been so affectionate before his departure and she’d worried the entire time he was away and he’d barely spared her a glance when he’d summarized very poorly what had occurred in his absence. Despite Sakura’s assurances and the soulmark they shared, Hinata was beginning to think that Naruto would never care half as much as she did.

She was at the training grounds by herself, declining Shino and Kiba’s offer to eat out. She was practicing her forms, trying to meditate and let her body flow unconsciously but it was hard with her head and heart in so much turmoil. Any semblance of calm she felt was shattered by the sound of Naruto’s voice calling her name exuberantly.

“Hinata! Hinata!”

Hinata turned towards his voice and blushed when she saw him running toward her with a beaming smile, his arms waving frantically to gain her attention. She felt the familiar threat of fainting tugging at her, but she was too spellbound by the affectionate smile that was aimed solely at her from the person she adored. She resisted the urge to look around and see if there was someone else he was aiming that lethal smile at.

“Naruto, it’s good to see you,” she said softly at his approach.

Naruto skidded to a halt, almost running into her. “Hinata! I got an S-rank mission!”

Hinata’s hesitant smile faded at the news, fear clutching in her chest. An S-rank? Why was Naruto given an S-rank mission? “What is the mission?” she asked in concern.

Naruto shrugged. “I don’t know but I know it’s really important. Granny Tsunade called me to the tower and gave it to me herself. Yamato-taichou is coming with me.” At her blank expression, his enthusiasm died a little. “What’s wrong, Hinata?”

“You just got back to the village,” she said with disappointment. They hadn’t had a chance to see each other at all. She felt selfish considering everything that was happening, but she’d been looking forward to a date with Naruto. She almost swooned at the thought, but she was too sad.

“Oh,” Naruto frowned. “I guess that’s true.” He scratched his head, lost on how to make Hinata happy. He’d been so excited to get an S-rank that he hadn’t considered that Hinata wouldn’t be happy for him too. He brightened as he thought of what he requested of Tsunade. “I asked Granny Tsunade if you could come too!”

Hinata’s whole face flushed red. “Me?”

“Yeah!” Naruto said excitedly. “I told her we can’t be too far from each other since we’re soulmates and all. Did you realize we were soulmates? Even if we’re not bonded, yet.” Naruto grumbled. “But maybe we can bond on this mission! And then your clan can’t complain about us dating!” Naruto shouted in surprise when Hinata’s eyes widened at his suggestion, her eyes going unfocused. He barely caught her as she fainted.

When Hinata regained consciousness, Naruto was looming over her with concern all over his face. She almost faded away again, but she was determined to stay awake and talk to Naruto.

“When did you realize we were soulmates?” Hinata squeaked.

“When I was coming home! I was really angry at Sasuke and trying to think of how I could convince him he was wrong when knocking sense into him didn’t work but I kept thinking of you and the date we agreed to, and wondering if you were thinking of me too and it was really confusing. Then Sakura kissed Kakashi’s hands and I realized that even though thinking of Sasuke was upsetting me, thinking of you made me feel better, just like Kakashi and Sakura were comforting each other. And then I knew it had to be true.”

“Do you know what bonding requires?” Hinata squeaked dumbstruck at Naruto’s explanation and just voicing her thoughts aloud.

“Sealing with chakra, physical commitment, bla bla bla,” Naruto grinned. “Whatever it is, we can figure it out together, right?” At her deer-in-the-headlights expression Naruto frowned, his stomach clenching in dread. “Unless you don’t want to bond with me? Is there someone else?” Red seeped into his eyes at the thought.

“No!” Hinata was quick to assure him. “There’s no one else.”

“Then what is it?” Naruto pressed her. “Is it me? Did you figure out you could do better, even if I’m going to be Hokage?”

“No, no, Naruto.” Hinata cupped his cheek in her palm, catching his attention. “I want to bond with you. It’s just so sudden. You just found out that we’re soulmates.”

“I don’t want to wait as long as Kakashi-sensei and Sakura,” Naruto said stubbornly. “You’re my soulmate so I want you with me.”

“And I want to go,” Hinata assured him. “But I must speak with my father.”

“Tsunade is going to petition your clan for their blessing.” Naruto announced. “But if you want to go, you can come no matter what, I promise.”

“You really want me to come with you?” Hinata asked in amazement.

“Of course!” Naruto declared. At the brief flash of doubt on her face, he stared down at her in confusion. “You know I like you Hinata, right?”

“We’re soulmates,” Hinata agreed, which really meant that he had no choice in the matter.

“I didn’t even know we were soulmates when I thought you were really pretty and when I asked you on a date.” Naruto said warmly. “I didn’t know we were soulmates when you faced Pein for me. But I did know that I liked you and it hurt to see your pain and suffering. I told Sakura I loved you, without even thinking. And I know it’s true. I might not be Hokage yet Hinata, but I promise one day I will be, and then I’ll be good enough for your clan.”

Hinata smiled in disbelief at the sincerity in Naruto’s voice. He said he loved her. “I want to go with you.” She told him firmly. “No matter what my father says.” Naruto’s smile was brighter than the sun and she found herself lost in it. "And it doesn't matter if my clan thinks you're good enough. I think you're the greatest and I know you're going to be Hokage one day." 

“Can I kiss you Hinata?” Naruto asked nervously.

At her enthusiastic nod, Naruto leaned down and pressed his lips against hers gently, enfolding her in his arms and resting his forehead against hers in contentment. “Do you want to go on our date now?”

“Do we have time?” Hinata asked hesitantly.

“We’ll make time,” Naruto vowed.

Hinata pulled away but reached out her hand and smiled happily when he entwined their fingers together.

XX

Sakura was mentally exhausted after the remainder of her day was spent at the hospital trying to prepare herself for what she would face in the days ahead, and then lending a hand for the following days with the patients when requested.

She knew that Kakashi was probably busy. For the most part, the meetings and decisions between the nations before the war actually started would commence with his presence not required. His talents and wisdom would come into play once the war started and he was leading the forces. However, he was coordinating joint training and meeting with the other ‘generals’ of the upcoming battle and she’d seen very little of him since they’d returned to the village as he seemed to be in and out of it every day.

She’d run into Naruto and Hinata a couple times and was both thrilled that they were finally figuring things out and extremely jealous they were officially dating before she and Kakashi had even discussed anything of the sort. It was frustrating to be able to finally be open about their relationship and then ending up not having anything to be open about when she rarely saw him. Eyes had been heavy on her the first couple days after the news spread, and she was certain Kakashi was also under heavy scrutiny, but Ino had informed her that there was some confusion if she and Kakashi were actually soulmates when they hadn’t been seen together since they’d separately recorded their soulmarks in the registry. She was sure Tsunade was happy with the rumours since she refused to speak of Kakashi with Sakura, and seemed thrilled that they were kept apart by their respective responsibilities.

Sakura had had enough of the distance between them. It felt like their relationship had stagnated despite their very public displays and declarations of only days before. She went to Kakashi’s apartment that evening and let herself in. She had no idea when he would be returning home, but she was hopeful that they would have the opportunity to eat together and spend some time together at least. She brought an overnight bag and shoved down the nerves she felt at the assumptions Kakashi might make. Sakura wanted to have sex; she just didn’t know if she was ready to have sex. But she did miss sleeping in Kakashi’s bed when he was gone on that extended mission, and desired intimacy with him above anything. She wanted the solid comfort of him beside her at night, and the privilege of seeing his face first thing when she woke up. She wanted quiet nights by his side, kisses goodnight and good morning. She wanted to see him often enough to make up for the time they’d been forced to stay apart.

She’d brought groceries, tsking when she opened his bare fridge. She hummed to keep herself company as she started preparing dinner, relaxing in the familiar environment that was beginning to feel like home. She knew Kakashi was willing to take the next step. He’d admitted as much the last time she was here, even if he’d framed it as a joke. The idea thrust so suddenly upon her had seemed almost frightening at the time, but her apartment didn’t smell like Kakashi. The layout of the kitchen wasn’t as convenient, her bed wasn’t as comfortable, her apartment didn’t have Mr. Ukki and his family. And most importantly, it didn’t have Kakashi. It was lonely to come home to an empty apartment and wonder if Kakashi was eating properly or getting enough sleep.

She felt his presence before he opened the door and entered his apartment. She turned towards him with a wide smile. “Welcome home, Kakashi!”

He blinked at the sight of her, closing his door carefully as if he didn’t want to scare her. “Sakura?”

“I’m making dinner.” Sakura informed him. “I hope you don’t mind that I’m wearing your pancake apron again.”

He approached her carefully, and she smiled at him warmly in encouragement. He discarded his Hitae-ate and pulled down his mask, fingers slipping under her chin and tilting it up so he could press a chaste kiss against her lips. “Am I dreaming?”

“No,” Sakura denied with a laugh. “I missed you so I thought I’d make you dinner.”

“I missed you too, Sakura.” Kakashi enfolded her in a hug and rested his chin lightly on the top of her head. “I feel like I haven’t seen you in weeks.”

“I know,” Sakura wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed him tightly. “I know what we’re doing is important and necessary, but I wish we had more time together.”

“I make it through every day with the thought that when this war is over, we will have all the time in the world to spend together.” Kakashi murmured into her hair.

“Every day,” Sakura agreed readily. “Unless we’re on missions.”

“Even more to look forward to,” Kakashi pulled away from her, tucking her hair behind her ear with a fond smile. “What’s for dinner?”

“Nothing special. I went with someone light in case you were too tired to eat. It is pretty late.”  She tugged at his vest zipper, helping him take it off and handing it back to him. “Go wash up. It’ll be ready shortly.”

When Kakashi returned he was just wearing a sleeveless undershirt with sleep pants. Sakura stared at his toned arms, blushing as he caught her looking. She busied herself with setting out food and hanging up his pancake apron. Without the apron, she was made aware of how little she was wearing. Really not more revealing than what she usually wore but it felt different since it was a pair of matching silk sleep shorts and tank top. Not to mention her breasts were unbound since she wasn’t on a mission. She felt exposed, which was ridiculous.

“Relax, Sakura.” Kakashi told her mildly. “Let’s eat.”

They sat down to eat and Kakashi distracted her with questions about her day and updating her on the latest news. Sakura relaxed and focused on the conversation and let everything else fall away. Dinner went smoothly and she enjoyed just being able to sit there with him and talk about their days without any pressing need to separate or concern about if anyone found out. It was everything she’d hoped for when she’d considered what life with her soulmate would be like. A quiet night together eating dinner, separate from her life as a shinobi.

When there was a lull in the conversation, Sakura reached over and placed her hand on Kakashi’s that was resting on the table. “I think I do want to move in with you.”

“You don’t have to rush into anything,” Kakashi cautioned, his other hand settling over hers, holding it between his. “I’m a patient man Sakura. For years I felt like a walking corpse, existing solely for this village. When I met you, it felt foolish to even consider having a soulmate, but I was wrong.” He smiled at her so tenderly her eyes teared up. “Life with you is warm and bright, and I want to spend it by your side. But we have the rest of our lives to explore every aspect of our relationship, and I want you to feel safe with me, to not have any concerns, any doubts, any fears. Never feel pressured into anything you aren’t ready for, never feel like you need to hide your thoughts from me, even if you think they would hurt me.”

“I was surprised when you asked me before,” Sakura admitted. “Sometimes I feel like I’m not as ready as you are, and I don’t want to let you down. I want to do more, but…”

“Sakura, I always want your consent, and if you aren’t sure, then you just need to tell me. I want sharing a home to mean a place where we are both comfortable and secure. If I’m too eager, or I push too quickly, never hesitate to stop me. If you’re not enjoying anything we do together, than I don’t want any part of it. I love you, Sakura. I love spending time with you, being able to eat dinner with you, talk about our days, listen to your concerns and provide comfort. I love being able to hold you, being able to brush your hair out of your face, wipe the tears off your face, make you smile and laugh. I want you to yell at me, kiss me, love me, but only if you’re willing. Sex is only one part of our relationship.

Kakashi’s expression was so earnest, yet she detected a trace of distress underlying his reassurances and it made her wish she’d never said anything. “I’m sorry Kakashi. I know you would never force me to do anything I don’t want to. I know that you love me. I didn’t mean…” She didn’t mean to hurt him.

Kakashi cupped her cheek and smiled in reassurance. “This is a conversation we should have had first, before anything. Communication and boundaries are important. I’m just…as new to relationships as you are Sakura. We’re both going to make mistakes, and we’re going to fight, and we’re going to misunderstand things and hurt, but I want to be able to apologize, to make it up to you, to show you that I’m not going to give up no matter what happens. That’s what I mean, when I say I love you Sakura. And I hope that’s what you mean as well.”

Sakura leaned forward over the table and pressed her lips to his. “Of course, it is.” She kissed him again. “I love you, Kakashi, Always.”

Kakashi smiled at her, and her heart skipped a beat, still unused to seeing his face without the mask. He was so handsome, and it was gratifying that she was the only person that was allowed to see him like this. Her soulmate. Her Kakashi.

They cleaned up the dishes together, and the nervousness that had been buzzing under her skin had completely subsided. This was her home, she felt it, and accepted it. They brushed their teeth side by side, and he went to prepare the bed while she completed the rest of her nightly routine. She came into the room to find him looking out his window, his shirt discarded. He was standing in front of the windowsill that held Mr. Ukki and his small family and she smiled at the sight. Sakura approached him and slid her arms around his waist, resting her cheek between his shoulder blades.

“What is it?” she asked him, nuzzling her cheek against the warm skin of his back and squeezing him gently, any inhibition she’d felt at her state of dress gone.  This was Kakashi, her soulmate.

“I was just waiting for you. I know you like the wall.” Kakashi turned and pulled her towards the bed, with the sheets pulled back neatly. She slid to her side of the bed and waited for him to join her before settling across his chest and pulling the sheets around the both of them. “Comfy?” Kakashi murmured sleepily.

“Very,” Sakura agreed, closing her eyes and breathing in his scent with contentment. “Goodnight, love you.”

“Love you.”