Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Alec woke up to the cold feel of the floor and an aching in his back. From his place on the floor, he could see the edge of the bed that he had just fallen off of and a depressing view of the plain ceiling.

That depressing view, however, quickly became much brighter. Magnus's face came into view above Alec, a lazy grin plastered across his face.

"Is the floor comfy? If so, I think I was wrongly informed. I thought I was getting hardwood." Magnus chuckled down at Alec.

"Yeah, well you thought you were getting a Lightwood, but I can definitely hold my alcohol." Alec muttered, hoping Magnus wouldn't hear him. It was clear that his attempts were for naught when Magnus burst out laughing.

"I cannot believe you Alexan-" Magnus was then cut off by his phone ringing. His ringtone, no matter how many times Alec asked him to change it was still some song that always made Alec blush when Magnus would sing it to him. Of course, this time was no different.

Magnus finally answered the phone and Alec got up from the floor. He grabbed a pair of sweats he had on the floor and stepped into them. He then slipped out of the room to get coffee.

He padded down the hallway and turned into the kitchen. Alec turned on the coffee pot and grabbed two mugs out of the cabinet. The one he used for himself had "Let's get one thing straight. I'm not." written across the front. The mug he would use for Magnus's coffee had been a gift. Alec was supposed to be waiting on Magnus in a café for their date, when he saw it. It was a mug that had rainbow lettering. Written was, "I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is." He has thought this was particularly fitting, considering as Magnus wasn't gay, but bisexual.

Ale grabbed the brewed coffee and started to pour it into Magnus's cup and then his own.

As he made his way back to the bedroom, Alec heard shouting coming from behind the door and winced. Clearly, the call Magnus had gotten wasn't pleasant in any way. Alec figured that Magnus had gotten a call from a client who planned to ruin his perfect morning with Magnus.

He eased the door open once he heard the voices die down. He held the coffee cup out to his beautiful boyfriend, who was just hanging up the phone. Magnus glanced up at Alec and gave a smile that wasn't all there.

"What happened?" Alec asked as he leaned down to plant a kiss on Magnus's forehead.

"Some client wanted me to summon a demon. I told him no, I am spending my wonderful morning with my equally wonderful boyfriend. He wasn't happy about it. I told him to go get another warlock." Magnus sipped his coffee and sighed into the cup. "Wow. This coffee is amazing."

"Brewed especially for you." Alec winked at Magnus and went to check the messages that his phone was alerting him of. "Oh. Well, there's an emergency at the Institute. They're asking me to bring you along, but you don't have to."

"No, that's quite alright. I'd love to come along. At least they finally figured out how to text instead of interrupting our intimate moments." Magnus teased as he slid out of bed and walked into the closet to get changed.

~*~*~

It seemed like there was no end to the demons that were portalling just outside of the Institute. Magnus's wards kept them out of the Institute itself, but the more stress that was put on them, the more likely they were to come down.

Alec didn't know how much longer he could take this. He was standing on the roof of the Institute so he could use his bow and arrows with much more precision. He had an overview of the battle below and was making sure that his family, including Magnus and Clary, stayed out of harms way.

As he shot his arrows with deadly precision, he saw Izzy's whip snapping, Clary's fiery red hair weaving through the crowd and Jace jumping over demon after demon to stab them in the back. There was one thing missing. Magnus's blue glow of magic.

He quickly scanned the crowd and spotted the sparkle of his boyfriend's hair. He was momentarily relieved until everything began to go in slow motion. He saw a demon crawl up behind Magnus and in an instant he had his stele out. He drew and activated a few runes to be able to jump off the roof and land safely.

When he was down on the field, he made his was towards Magnus. He was nearing closer and closer to help Magnus, but he wasn't quick enough. The demon stabbed its horrific claw into Magnus's back, eliciting a pained scream from Magnus.

Alec closed the distance faster than he'd ever done anything, and drove his seraph blade home. The demon howled and disintegrated.

Magnus turned around and smiled at Alec. "Alexander. My brave Shadowhunter." Magnus fell, and Alec was under him as soon as he saw Magnus's feet give way.

"Oh Raziel. What should I do Magnus?" He frantically attempted to lift him but only received complaints from Magnus. The wounds on his back were to severe for much of anything.

"Hey, Alexander. Don't worry about me. Go do your job, Shadowhunter." Magnus lifted his hand up to Alec's cheek and sadly smiled. "I love you."

"D-don't say that. Not like this. You are not saying goodbye to me." Alec desperately wished that the damned creatures surrounding them would just give up.

"Be safe, darling. And please try to find someone else." Alec's heart clenched at these words and the tears were openly falling.

"No, no, no. No, Magnus you aren't dying. You're the only one for me. Please, ple-"

"Goodbye, my darling Alexander. I love you."

"I- I love you too." Alec heard Magnus take a deep breath, and slowly let it out. He strained to hear anything else. There wasn't anything left to hear.

The rest of the battle was a blur. The only thing Alec could think of was the last breath he heard the love of his life take.

~*~*~

The battle had finally ended. In the Clave’s eyes it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could have been. The message from Clave leadership following the demon attack was rolling on every screen in the Institute.

Death toll in NYC: 12 shadowhunters, 27 mundanes, 1 warlock

Alec’s eyes were glued to the sight of 1 warlock. It was all he could see.

“Alec, I’m so sorry,” Izzy’s voice quietly said, ripping Alec out of the trance he was stuck in.

He turned to look at Izzy, but could still see 1 warlock behind his eyes. He needed to be left alone. He couldn’t think, couldn’t talk. He just needed to run from everything. He nodded at Izzy to acknowledge her empathy, then left without a word.

He walked out of the Institute and ran through New York until he couldn’t anymore. At that point, he activated his stamina rune and continued on. After hours of this, he looked up and found he had ended up at Magnus’s loft.

When he entered the loft, Alec threw anything within his reach. Shattered glass, pieces of fabric, and broken wood littered the floor.

Alec dropped to his knees amongst the mess and finally allowed the tears to fall. He felt everything he had been blocking out for hours. His heart felt like it would explode out of his chest and his head would burst. Through his tears, he caught sight of one of the items he had thrown during his fit of rage. A framed photograph of himself and Magnus. It was a photo that Magnus had pulled from his own memories. Alec and Magnus sitting on the couch, simply enjoying one another’s company. A happy memory now traced with spiderwebs of grief and pain, similar to the cracks in the glass. Alec held the frame close as he continued sobbing. He felt as though he would never stop crying.

Exhaustion eventually took over and Alec fell asleep there on the floor, surrounded by his pain.

Chapter Text

Alec felt a familiar cold and sore sensation. His night on the floor was clearly not kind to him or his body. He refused to open his eyes. Opening them meant that he had to look at the reminders of his love that had been ripped away from him.

Alec could almost hear Magnus’s voice from the morning before. “Is the floor comfy? If so, I think I was wrongly informed. I thought I was getting hardwood.”

It hurt how real it felt. He wished he could wake up in the day before. Yet, that was impossible. Alec would have to face the harsh reality soon, but he wasn’t quite ready.

“Are you going to lay there all day?”

This hadn’t happened the morning of Magnus’s death. Alec’s eyes shot open. He was immediately greeted with Magnus’s smile.

“Is there something wrong, dear? You look like you’ve seen a-“ Magnus’s commentary on Alec’s confused face was cut off by the ringtone that once embarrassed Alec. Now, he could not be more glad to hear the song.

As Magnus answered the phone, Alec slowly stood up, massaging the back of his neck as if it could work the confusion out of his body. He pulled his sweatpants on and decided upon continuing his day as normal. He needed this to be a normal day, just starting off with an extremely realistic dream. He interrupted Magnus to give him a kiss for good measure, though.

He snuck out of the room to brew coffee as usual. He found the mugs in the same place as they were in his dream. Everything was giving him a strong sense of deja vu. Alec thought of every moment leading up to Magnus dying in his horrible nightmare. He didn’t want to forget any moment in case it was a premonition of what would happen today. He would finish brewing coffee, hear Magnus arguing with his client, then check his messages. He would ask Magnus to come along to the Institute. This was the moment he had to change if it all were true.

Alec’s thoughts were interrupted by Magnus wrapping his arms around Alec’s waist.

“Thank the angel, something changed,” Alec whispered.

“What was that, darling?” Magnus moved his head around Alec’s shoulder to look at him.

“It’s nothing. Did a client ask about a demon summoning?” Alec needed to know if his dream was at least partially true.

“Yes. Were you eavesdropping on my lecturing of how I wished to spend this wonderful morning with my equally wonderful boyfriend?”

“I don’t have to eavesdrop. I have shadowhunter ears.” Alec quickly came up with an excuse as to why he would know without invading his boyfriend’s privacy. He couldn’t believe how odd this morning was starting off.

Buzzes in his back pocket distracted his train of thought. Alec passed one of the cups of coffee to Magnus and pulled his phone out to see messages about an emergency at the Institute.

“Maybe you should go see that client of yours. There’s an emergency at the Institute and they’re asking for all hands on deck. Even your help, but I don’t want to pull you into a battle.”

Magnus looked at Alec inquisitively. “It’s quite alright, Alexander. I can handle a little demon attack and I don’t mind helping anyway.”

“You’re either staying here or helping with that demon summoning. This shouldn’t be too difficult to deal with, so you shouldn’t waste your energy on a battle that isn’t yours anyway.” Alec walked to the bedroom and got dressed for the battle.

“Alright, fine. But you owe me a morning dedicated to spending time together!” Magnus yelled from the kitchen.

~*~*~

The battle seemed to be never ending , and many men were lost. Alec looked at the screen’s report.

Death Toll in NYC: 26 shadowhunters, 39 mundanes

Izzy came up to Alec, laying a hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Alec. Too many were lost today.”

“It could’ve been a lot worse. I’m just glad the people I love are alright.” Alec turned and pulled his little sister into a tight hug.

“Okay, Alec I can’t breathe. I love you big brother, but I have to be able to breathe,” Izzy said with a strain in her voice.

“Right, sorry,” Alec said with a soft smile on his face, “I’m going to head out. Check on Magnus. He had a summoning to do for a client.”

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Izzy smiled and walked away.

~*~*~

These were the moments that Alec hated the penthouse. After a long day fighting demons, he hated to walk up to the top floor of the high rise. He finally finished the ascent and headed towards the front door of the loft.

Alec immediately noticed something was off. The front door was slightly ajar. He pulled out his bow, and crept slowly towards the door. He entered, clearing the entrance and kitchen in one sweep. As he entered the living room, he saw Magnus lying on the floor, a mess of papers and potions surrounding him.

The bow fell to the floor as Alec rushed to Magnus’s side. He assessed the damage quickly, finding a single wound through Magnus’s chest. “Magnus, no. Please don’t be dead. I can’t do this again. Please, please.”

“Alexan- Alexander. My brave shadowhunter.” Magnus’s breath was uneven and his voice was raspy.

“No. You can’t do this to me. I won’t find someone else. You aren’t allowed to say goodbye. We’re going to find help.” Alec couldn’t believe the same thing was happening again. It was just a dream, yet he was hearing the same words out of Magnus’s mouth.

“I held on as long as I could. I love you, goodbye.”

~*~*~

There was nothing for Alec to do. He laid next to Magnus’s body on the floor as if it would somehow bring him back. Alec imagined that they would wake up in bed next to one another, warm bodies entangled together. Instead, he was here; on the floor lying next to a cold body.

He used what little strength he had to send a single text to Izzy: Magnus is dead.

The next few hours felt like a blur. Izzy and Jace came to the loft and moved Magnus’s body out. Alec never moved. He felt like he had stopped while the world kept spinning in fast motion around him. Even when Jace knelt down to try to speak to him and Izzy laid on the floor across from him, Alec did not flinch. He stayed where he was and allowed the numbness to engulf him.

Jace returned to the Institute to head the investigation of Magnus’s death. Izzy laid on the couch only feet away from Alec. Alec still felt entirely alone in the world. He couldn’t live without Magnus. Before Magnus, Alec’s life was a never ending routine. Sure, he had Izzy and Jace, but there wasn’t a purpose or joy to the life he was leading. Only duty. During Magnus, Alec had a reason to wake up and live each day. There was no Alec before Magnus, so there would be no Alec after Magnus.

Eventually, Izzy guided Alec to the couch opposite her. They laid there like when they were children sharing a room. Eyes closed, knowing the other isn’t truly asleep, but avoiding conversation just in case.

After some time, Alec could hear Izzy’s breathing become more steady and relaxed. He wanted to fight sleep, but his heavy eyes took charge. A blanket of sleep engulfed Alec quickly.

Chapter Text

This was the third morning Alec awoke with a pang in his back. He had always thought Magnus' couch would be comfortable but had never tested it for a full night. Apparently, it wasn't the best place to sleep. He was sure Izzy felt the same way since she was sleeping on an identical couch across from his. Normally, he'd be desperate to share his pain with his little sister. This morning, though, he couldn't bring himself to open his eyes. He knew he would be met with Izzy's apologetic eyes. The kind of eyes that made Alec feel like it was his fault for being in pain.

"Is the floor comfy? If so, I think I was wrongly informed. I thought I was getting hardwood" Alec could hear Magnus' voice again. This was the third morning that Alec awoke to hearing his wonderful warlock's voice. He didn't know what he wanted to hear more, Magnus' voice or Izzy's. At least if it was Izzy's, Alec had something real to hold on to. If it was truly Magnus, Alec was afraid he was falling into madness. He wouldn't be able to decipher real from fantasy.

"Are you going to lay there all day?" Magnus' voice spoke once again. Perhaps Alec was reliving yesterday one more time. He could be imagining it all, though. Maybe the first time was a dream, the second was all real, and today Alec was simply remembering what had happened the night before.

"Darling, are you alright?" Magnus sounded a bit more urgent this time. Alec felt more defeated this time. He couldn't believe that he was about to open his eyes and see Magnus' face peeking over the bed. He couldn't keep reliving this nightmare. He opened his eyes, seeing exactly what he had expected.

"Magnus, I-" Alec's voice broke, but he worked to keep it together, "I think I'm in a nightmare."

"Well, that's a bit dramatic for falling off the bed," Magnus' smiled, although the smile didn't quite reach his eyes. Magnus' concern was evident in the way he spoke.

"No, Magnus. I'm being serious. I keep waking up here." Alec got up from his spot on the floor.

"I'm sure waking up in my loft isn't that horrendous. Surely, you're not talking about the floor, though. I haven't seen you fall off the bed since, well, ever."

Alec, sitting down on the bed, looked at Magnus with exasperation. "You're not understanding me. It's fine. I can't keep living this, though, so we're not getting out of bed today. I'm not going to the Institute, and you're not answering that phone."

As if by magic, Magnus' phone began to ring. Magnus looked at Alec incredulously, wondering how he had just predicted that. Alec shook his head and pulled the phone out of Magnus' hands. He would not allow Magnus to leave the house. Instead, they would have a perfectly normal day in bed, where Alec could protect Magnus. Magnus attempted to reach for the phone, but Alec quickly moved it out of reach and declined the call.

"Alexander, I love your idea of a good day, but we both have responsibilities. We can't simply lay around and ignore the world every day," Magnus said in a dreamy voice, as if he were imagining the possibility.

"No, we can't every day, but we can today. And we will. I just have a bad feeling about today," Alec stated, desperately trying to convince his boyfriend.

"Alright, fine. Will you at least tell me what's bothering you, dear?"

"I can't explain it. I just know there's something up with today." Alec felt bad for lying to Magnus, but he didn't want to feel crazy. He knew Magnus would believe him, but that would make him feel even crazier. Alec felt the buzz of his phone on the nightstand, already knowing that the Institute was asking him and Magnus to come in. He reached to turn his phone off and fell back into Magnus' arms. At least this way he would know Magnus was safe. He could protect him.

~*~*~

Alec stared at his phone as he received the reports from the attack.

Death toll: 34 Shadowhunters, 61 mundanes

Between Magnus and himself, they could have saved 22 Shadowhunters and 34 mundanes. It wasn't hard for Alec to convince himself that it was worth it, though. Alec would nearly let the whole world burn if it meant he could protect Magnus. However, a thought crept into his mind. Would he let his siblings die for Magnus? As quickly as the thought came, Alec was reaching for his phone. He dialed Izzy's number, memorized like the back of his hand. It rang several times before Izzy finally picked up.

"Hello?" Izzy's voice came across the line.

"Thank Raziel, you're okay," Alec let out a breath.

"Yeah, no thanks to you. Where were you today, Alec? We thought maybe you were hurt. There wasn't any time to check, though, what with hundreds of demons attacking the Institute," Izzy lectured, sounding eerily similar to their mother.

"Izzy, I'm sorry. You know I would usually be there, but there was something that came up with Magnus. I can't really explain it, but I had to be here with him," Alec responded, instantly feeling like a little kid again.

"Oh, by the Angel, is everything okay? Is Magnus okay?" Izzy quickly asked. It was a big deal for Alec to miss a fight, so he wasn't surprised that Izzy was questioning Magnus' safety.

"He's fine, everything's fine. What about over there? Jace and Clary are alright?"

"Well, no, not exactly," Alec could feel his heart start to race. He hadn't felt anything through his parabatai bond, but what if he had missed something? "Jace is perfectly fine, as always, but Clary is pretty hurt. The Silent Brothers had to take a look at her, and they said she won't wake up for at least a week. She has some pretty nasty demon poisoning."

Oh, thank the Angel. Alec knew it was wrong to be thanking anyone that Clary was hurt, but he couldn't deal with his parabatai being hurt. Especially not after everything he had been through the last couple of days. At least no one was dead. "Okay, well, I'll be in tomorrow. I still have some things to wrap up here at Magnus'. Write an incident report about the attack and have it to me by tomorrow at noon. I'll need to interview everyone involved, so quickly debrief everyone tonight. Then, get some rest. Everything else can wait until the morning."

"Well, at least you still know how to act like a diplomat. Talk to you later, big brother." Alec heard the click of the other line going dead. Izzy's words stung a little, but he didn't have a choice. He had to be here with Magnus, no matter the cost.

~*~*~

Magnus had finally convinced Alec to wind down around 10 o'clock. Alec had planned on staying up all night under the guise of finishing paperwork after the demon attack. In reality, Alec wanted to stay up all night to make sure he would actually wake up the next morning. It was hard for Alec to say no to Magnus, though. Especially when he was wearing barely anything with a robe loosely tied around his waist.

Alec followed Magnus to the bedroom, where Magnus pushed him onto the bed and climbed on top of him. Their hands were intertwined next to Alec's face and their lips were interlocked. Alec could feel his worries slipping away. He had almost forgotten about the terrible two day long dream he had just experienced less than 16 hours prior. Everything seemed to melt away as soon as he touched Magnus.

Alec untied Magnus' robe and pulled it off, exposing Magnus' toned shoulders. His hands explored this newly exposed skin. Magnus' hands were at each side of Alec's face, barely holding him above Alec. Magnus slightly pulled away from the kiss, not leaving much room between their faces. Alec, hoping to continue the kiss followed Magnus with his lips. Magnus placed one finger on Alec's chin, gently pushing his head back down.

"Are you ever planning on telling me why it was necessary to stay at home today?" Magnus grinned after seeing the mournful look on Alec's face. He loved to tease his Shadowhunter.

"No. I am planning on kissing you, though," Alec said as he attempted to lift his head again. Magnus kept Alec in place and moved back again.

"Ah-ah, that's not how this works. I am-" Magnus' words were cut off midsentence as a look of horror came about him.

Magnus looked down to his midsection, and Alec followed suit. They could see blood dripping onto Alec's torso and the glint of the tip of a blade protruding from Magnus' stomach. Alec shoved Magnus off of him to pursue the attacker who had simply left their blade in Magnus' gut. Alec grabbed the bow and quiver from the doorway and began his pursuit. As he rounded the corner, he saw a shrouded figure glance back at him before opening a portal. Alec quickly grabbed an arrow and shot it towards the portal, hoping to catch the figure before it could close. His attempt was futile, though, and the arrow lodged itself in the wall opposite of him.

"Damnit," Alec muttered to himself.

He hurried back to the bedroom to check on Magnus. He hoped, even prayed, that this wouldn't be the ending he was sure it would be. As he entered the room, he saw Magnus covered in his own blood. He rushed to the bed and lifted Magnus' head. He sat down underneath Magnus and gave Magnus a tender kiss.

"Alexander. My brave Shadowhunter," Magnus said, with an all too familiar rasp in his voice.

"Damnit, Magnus. I'm not saying goodbye this time either. We're going to call Catarina. She'll know what to do," Alec said while he reached for his phone.

He quickly pressed on Catarina's contact and prayed that she would answer with the same urgency. It only rang a few times before he received an answer.

"Alec, what can I do for you? This had better be good, because I'm just getting off a 36-hour rotation," Catarina answered the phone in her usual exhausted voice. Alec didn't understand how she dealt with mundanes and their issues all day.

"It's Magnus. He's hurt badly. I need you to get to his loft right now, we're in his bedroom and I don't think he'll last much longer," Alec spouted out.

Alec had barely finished his sentence, and a portal opened before him. Catarina stepped out of the portal and rushed to Magnus' side, magic at the ready. She attempted to heal the wound, but it seemed like blood was running out of Magnus' body before she could get anything completed. She looked at Alec with despair.

"Magnus, you're going to be okay. You hear me? Just keep holding on," Catarina said to Magnus. It sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than she was trying to convince Magnus.

"Ale-Alexander," Magnus whispered, "please try to find someone else. I don't think I can hang on much longer."

Alec could feel tears beginning to form in his eyes. "No, Magnus. You are going to be just fine. Cat is here to help, so you'll be just fine."

Alec could see the glimmer of life fading away from Magnus' eyes. He saw the last breath that Magnus would take. Of course, Alec knew what would happen. He would wake up, and Magnus would be hanging his head over the side of the bed. He wouldn't truly be dead, but he couldn't imagine living through this pain again and again for the rest of his life. He had to figure out how to save Magnus.

Catarina interrupted Alec's thoughts. "He's gone, Alec. I'm sorry. I tried to heal him, but he had already lost too much blood."

"It's fine. I understand. Just leave, please," Alec said without looking away from his love. He felt guilty for treating Cat like this. After all, she was one of Magnus' oldest friends. However, Alec needed to be alone. He needed to think about his plan for the next few days.

Cat walked out without another word. Alec could hear the portal open and close in the living room. Alec went directly to Magnus' books. There had to be something he could find within them that would explain what he was going through. He poured over the books for hours on end until he eventually dozed off unknowingly.

Chapter Text

Fuck.

That was the first thing that came to Alec’s mind as he woke up with an ache in his back yet again. He couldn’t tell if he’d rather wake up aching from the uncomfortable position he fell asleep in, sprawled across the books, or if he hoped he’d open his eyes and see Magnus again. Either option was depressing.

Before he could fully open his eyes, he stood up.

“Ow!” An exclamation was heard from Magnus. Alec rubbed his eyes and looked up to see Magnus holding his head and scrunching his face in pain. “Why couldn’t you let me admire you a little longer?”

“Sorry, Magnus. I love you, but I’ve got to get to the Institute,” Alec said, placing a quick peck on his boyfriend’s forehead before rushing to find his clothes Magnus had torn off him the night, well three nights before.

“What a rush. Have you gained telepathic abilities that you haven’t told me about? You haven’t even gotten a call asking you to come in early,” Magnus complained with a pout on his face.

“Yes, I know. There’s just some things I need to get done,” Alec dismissively stated.

“Alright, do your job Shadowhunter. I’m expecting good treatment tonight, though,” Magnus said, hoping to coax Alec out of his evident mood.

Magnus’ phone began to ring, causing Alec’s pulse to spike. He hadn’t thought this far into his plan. He had convinced Magnus to cancel on the client before, but only when he stayed behind as well. Hopefully, his bad mood wouldn’t affect his chances.

“Magnus, by the Angel, do not answer that phone.”

Magnus looked at Alec inquisitively, still reaching for his phone, despite the warning. “Alexander, I love you, but your attitude this morning is confusing to say the least. What is going on?”

“Listen,” Alec started, sitting down beside Magnus on the silky sheets, “I can’t explain what’s going on quite yet. I don’t even know what’s going on. I just need you to trust me. Strengthen your wards, don’t go anywhere, and I’m going to the Institute to investigate.”

“Darling, you have to give me a little more than that. What are you investigating?”

“I don’t know. Call it a feeling, a hunch, whatever. I just- Magnus you have to trust me. Please.” Alec had tears welling up in his eyes. He didn’t know if it was best to tell him exactly what he had been experiencing, or if it was best to keep Magnus in the dark. At least he was pretty sure he’d have a few days to try different options.

“Alright. I hope you know that I’m going to want an explanation when you get home.” Magnus ran a hand over Alec’s back, calming the Shadowhunter with the warmth of his touch.

~*~*~

Fuck.

Alec had barely stepped foot into the Institute when the alarms began to blare. Of course he wouldn’t get the opportunity to consult any of the Institute’s resources about his dilemma. Instead, he had to throw himself into battle instantly.

He began preparing every Shadowhunter he came across. Alec wanted this fight to be much quicker than the couple he had experienced before. He found Izzy, Jace, and Clary not too long after arriving in the weapons room.

“Hey, we’ve got our work cut out for us in this battle. Somehow, these demons are going to be entering this realm at an alarming rate. We have to be efficient. They’re going to keep coming at us all night and we’ll lose a lot of ranks if we don’t push through. Keep up on stamina runes when you can. Jace, you’re with me,” Alec barked, turning into more of a leader than a brother.

“I mean, I was planning on sticking with Clary. She’s not the most trained Shadowhunter we have.” Jace’s excuse was subpar at best. Everyone in the room knew that he just wanted to be Clary’s knight in shining armor.

“No, Jace. We have to use every advantage we have and that includes our parabatai bond.” Alec furrowed his eyebrows in Jace’s direction.

“Okay, Alec, you’re more stressed than you usually are walking into a routine demon battle. What do you know that we don’t?” The parabatai bond was great in most aspects, but when Alec wanted to hide something, it made life difficult.

“I don’t know anything, Jace. I just don’t want to lose any fellow Shadowhunters,” Alec snapped, his frustration rising “Now, get geared up.”

~*~*~

Fuck.

The demons never seemed to end. The first time he experienced this battle was bad enough. This time it was even worse. Perhaps it only felt that way because Alec wanted to leave to look into his repeating days. Regardless, Alec kept pushing through, next to his parabatai.

It wasn’t often that Alec and Jace fought together anymore. Jace had Clary to fight with and Alec had Magnus. It was almost refreshing to be fighting with his bonded battle partner. They slipped back into the seamless rhythm they had developed over the years. Their combat was graceful – almost like a choreographed dance. When one struck at a demon, the other was ready at the back to get the next demon.

Alec could feel the sweat dripping down his back. All around him, demons screeched as they were sent back to Hell, where they belonged. His arm burnt from the hours he had spent swinging his blade as demons continued to crawl their way through a glimmering portal.

Alec glanced between the Shadowhunters and demons to find Izzy and Clary battling side by side. While plunging a seraph blade into the demon in front of him, he thought of Izzy and Clary’s natural connection. They didn’t fight together quite as smoothly as he and Jace, but they would make great parabatai.

Just as Alec had predicted, the demons’ onslaught seemed to never end. Maybe this battle was a bit quicker than he had experienced before, though. They finished the battle just before the sun dipped below the horizon. The last demon had finally been vanquished. Bloodied and battered, they all returned to the Institute. A few Shadowhunters remained outside to honor their fallen soldiers. The win felt hollow to Alec, but at least he had time.

While the other Shadowhunters went to the weapons room or to their bedrooms, Alec went straight to the library, his mind heavy with unanswered questions. On his way there, he sent a text to Izzy.

Can you debrief? I’ve got a few things to do that can’t wait. Let everyone know that I’ll be interviewing tomorrow throughout the day.

His phone buzzed with Izzy’s response almost immediately.

What’s going on with you?

Alec typed out a response, but held his thumb over the send button. He wanted to confide in someone. Ask for help, even. He just didn’t want to admit that he was likely going crazy. Alec hit send and stuffed his phone back in his pocket.

Nothing is going on. Just finish up the debrief please.

~*~*~
Two hours later, Alec’s eyes were red from exhaustion. Books were scattered across the desk, the pile of discarded ones growing as he flipped through pages. His mind was miles away, anxiety gnawing at him like a persistent shadow.
The door creaked open, and Jace stepped into the room, his steps slow, hesitant. Alec barely looked up.
“What do you want, Jace? I don’t have time right now,” Alec said, the harshness of his tone cutting through the air.
“Can you just tell me what’s going on? I can feel your anxiety pouring over the bond. It’s not just anxiety either, it's…” Jace trailed off, avoiding his guess at what Alec was feeling.

Alec paused and tried to identify his feelings. He hadn’t even considered that he was feeling anything. He was more focused on figuring out what was going on. He had to dig deep into his own psyche to even feel. When he reached far enough, it hit him like a punch to his gut.

“Grief,” Alec finally responded after he had thought about it.

“Yeah, grief. What is going on Alec? I’m your parabatai. You can tell me anything,” Jace said sincerely.

“Look, I can’t explain it. I don’t even know what’s going on, and honestly I feel like I might be going a little insane,” Alec muttered, not making eye contact with Jace.

“Maybe I can help you figure it out. I have been around the block far too many times with crazy,” Jace said, trying to make light of the situation. However, Jace knew that this situation was much heavier than he could even imagine. He could feel it through their bond.

“Dammit Jace,” Alec muttered. Speaking a little louder, he continued, “Alright, here’s the deal. I’ve seen Magnus die three times now. Each slightly different, but somehow the same. I have read nearly all of Magnus’ library and now half of the Institute’s library, but there’s nothing. Absolutely nothing.”

Jace’s silence was deafening, his eyes darkening at the weight of Alec’s words. Alec broke the silence before Jace could. “You can report me to the Clave or the Silent Brothers or Izzy or whatever authority you see fit. It doesn’t matter because I will wake up tomorrow - well, today - and none of this will have happened. Whatever you do, make sure it doesn’t interrupt me. I have to figure this out.”

Jace allowed the silence to refill the library momentarily.

“I’m not going to report you. I’m going to help you,” Jace said as he got up from the armchair. He walked towards the bookshelves and began reading the spines of each book. “Maybe, we can start to figure out what could be helpful and what’s not helpful at all. Then, tomorrow, you’ll have less to read.”

“Until the answer is in one of the books we decided to discard. I’ve gone through this entire case,” Alec said gesturing to the bookcase behind him, “So, why don’t you start across the room.”

Jace crossed the room and climbed the ladder to reach the top shelf. He threw every book from the top few shelves onto the floor and descended back to the floor. Among the books is where Jace sat, like a kindergartener at the classroom rug. Criss-crossed legs, Jace dove into the research.

Only five minutes later, Izzy and Clary joined them, starting at shelves ninety degrees to the shelves Jace and Alec were working on. Wordlessly, they researched the possible cause of Alec’s dilemma.

As the minutes ticked by, Alec could feel his anxiety worsening. He needed to get home to protect Magnus, but he needed to find answers.

~*~*~

Alec grabbed one of the last few books in the pile. As he thumbed through the pages, his fingers trembled. 8:36.

Alec finished the book and set it in the discard pile. He reached for another book, realizing there were only two books left in the pile. Izzy grabbed the last book. Alec’s breathing became shallowed, hoping there would be an answer in one of these two books. He glanced at his watch as he brought the book into his lap. 8:52.

“That was surprisingly quick. I was sure we’d be here for the rest of the night,” Izzy said as she shelved the final book.

“That’s not a good thing,” Alec said hoarsely, “I’m going to Magnus.”

“Alec, do you have a plan for if this happens again tomorrow?” Jace asked.

“Yes. Find and kill whoever started this all.” Alec stalked out of the room and headed to the loft.

~*~*~

As Alec entered the loft, he was relieved that the door was fully closed. At least nothing was out of place yet. It was only 9 o’clock, so Alec hoped that he had made it back in time. He hadn’t paid attention to the time the last few days, but he was fairly sure that Magnus had died each time just before 10 o’clock.

“Magnus?” Alec called out to the quiet loft.

Magnus turned the corner leading to the entryway. “Hello, darling. How was your day fighting demons and researching your gut feeling?” Magnus’ slight annoyance at being left in the dark was evident in his voice and on his face.

“Horrible and worse,” Alec said, heading straight to Magnus to fall into his arms.

“Tell me all about it,” Magnus said.

“Okay fine. But you have to promise not to think I’m crazy or start calling the nearest warlocks to help you figure out what’s wrong with me.”

“Promise,” Magnus said while gently tracing his finger along Alec’s jaw.

~*~*~

Magnus grazed his thumb along his bottom lip as Alec brought his long-winded story to a close. Normally, this motion would have Alec melting into a puddle at Magnus’ feet. Tonight, though, he was more worried about deciphering the devastatingly handsome look on his warlock’s face. Alec glanced at his watch as he waited for Magnus to respond. 9:19.

“Alexander, I’m afraid I don’t have a good answer for you. I have never, in my immortal years, heard of this happening.” Magnus looked at Alec with a slight glimmer of fear behind his eyes.

“No, this can’t be true. There’s no possible way that the first time this has ever happened, it’s happening to me. Why would it be happening to me?” Alec ran his fingers through his hair and stopped at the crown of his head to hold his neck up, as if he couldn’t bear the weight any longer. Tears began to fall from Alec’s eyes onto the ground.

“When?” Magnus said, barely above a whisper.

Alec startled as if he had forgotten his boyfriend was in the room. “What?”

“When? What time is it going to happen?” Magnus glanced up and Alec could see the fear blatantly on Magnus’ face like a red slap mark on his cheek.

“Um, like 10, I think,” Alec said as he was reminded to check his watch. 9:21. “I haven’t looked at the exact time the last few days, but it’s somewhere around 10.”

“Alec, leave,” Magnus said. Alec looked at him with shock and hurt written in his eyes.

“What? No, Magnus, you have to believe me. Please, I can’t leave you alone,” Alec pleaded with Magnus. He grabbed Magnus’ hands between his own, folding his hands as if he were praying. At this point, Alec was praying. Magnus let a light smile play across his lips in Alec’s direction. The smile doesn’t quite reach Magnus’ eyes.

“I do believe you and that’s the problem. You can’t be here. You’ve already watched me die two times and seen my dead body three. I’m not letting you go through this again.” Magnus pulled his hands out of Alec’s grip. “Alec, leave. And don’t come back tonight.”

“What if I wake up and the loop is over? And I did nothing to protect you?” Alec’s tone was heartbreaking.

“What if you wake up and the loop is still going? And you’re too traumatized to do anything to save me?” Magnus stood up and held his hand out to his Shadowhunter. “Go on, dear. I’ll be here in the morning, whether the morning is that of today or tomorrow.”

Alec conceded. He could rarely argue with Magnus and at this point he almost agreed with him. He didn’t know how many more visions of Magnus’ dead body he could compartmentalize. He reached for Magnus’ hand and stood. Magnus led him to the entryway. When they reached the front door, Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus. He breathed in Magnus’ sandalwood shampoo and felt the warmth of his body. He tried to memorize what it felt like to hug Magnus.

After some time wrapped in Magnus’ arms, Alec lifted his arm slightly to bring his watch into view. 9:34. Alec tightened his arms around his love. He continued to memorize Magnus’ arms, his smell, his everything. He didn’t want to forget anything.

Magnus pulled away from the hug to place a gentle kiss on Alec’s lips. Alec could instantly feel his own cheeks wetting with Magnus’ tears. He brought his head back to look at his boyfriend’s eyes. He could see they were glistening with tears and fear. He brought his forehead to Magnus’, their noses lying beside one another like puzzle pieces meant to be together. They shared a few soft kisses, both obviously memorizing what it felt like.

Magnus reached his hand out and snapped, creating a portal to the Institute. Alec could hear the woosh of the portal behind him. He gave Alec another kiss, this one feeling more like a goodbye than anything.

“Maybe I should just stay here,” Alec whispered into Magnus’ mouth when they had both retreated from the lip lock.

“Maybe,” Magnus whispered. He gave Alec a gentle kiss and began walking into him, forcing Alec to walk backwards. “Goodbye, Alexander.” With a gentle shove, Magnus pushed Alec through the portal.

~*~*~

Fuck.

Alec was back in the Institute, trapped again by the endless loop. His fist slammed into the nearest wall, the impact sending a sharp pain up his arm. Anger surged through him, hot and overwhelming. There was nothing he could do to save Magnus, nothing but this bitter, gnawing feeling in his gut. Worse, the one person he loved more than anything was now protecting him—forcing him to leave. A sickening realization settled over Alec: he'd left Magnus to die alone. He wanted to scream, to tear through the Institute and make it stop.

Instead, he collapsed in his stiff bed. He laid there, his thoughts nearly devouring him with grief. It was as if the weight of his failure pressed down on him, suffocating any chance of peace. The images of Magnus—alive, laughing, and full of life—flashed in his mind, only to be replaced with the cruel reminder of his death. Each time, it had been the same: helpless, powerless, watching the life drain from the one person who meant everything to him.

Alec’s breath hitched, and the tears came, despite his best efforts to hold them back. He couldn't even console himself with the idea that this time might be different, that maybe he'd find a way to save Magnus. Because he knew it would happen again. The same cycle. The same heartbreak. The same grief.

His thoughts spiraled, tugging him deeper into despair. What if it was his fault? What if there was something he could have done? He couldn’t escape the relentless question: What kind of partner was he, if he couldn't even protect the man he loved? Alec clenched his fists, the sheets tangling around his limbs as if even his body rejected the weight of his own sorrow. Magnus deserves better.

He tried to get out of bed, he had to go back to Magnus. But, Alec could feel an odd pressure gently holding him down. It nearly reminded him of Magnus laying his full body weight over him when he didn’t want his Shadowhunter to return to the Institute in the mornings. Alec was sure that this was Magnus’ doing. His magic had followed him all the way home and was now holding him in place. He focused on his legs, trying to see through any sort of glamour or aura. He could vaguely make out the sight of blue twinges of magic surrounding his legs.

Dammit, Magnus. Alec thought to himself. He subconsciously checks his watch again. 9:48.

Blue magic flickers – and then nothing.

Chapter Text

Alec awoke, heart pounding. He tried his best to recall the last moments of the previous night. He remembered Magnus shoving him through the portal to the Institute. He could still feel the anger that rushed through his body as he realized he couldn’t save Magnus again. He remembered laying down in bed, and that’s where it got a little fuzzy.

“Is the floor comfy? If so, I think I was wrongly informed. I thought I was getting hardwood.” Magnus’ warm voice interrupted Alec’s thoughts.

Alec opened his eyes to see Magnus’ face smiling down at him from the bed he had fallen off of four mornings ago. “No, it’s not comfortable.” Alec cringed at the anger that came through his voice. He had to remind himself that this Magnus didn’t remember anything from the night before.

“Woah, falling off the bed must’ve put you in a sour mood. Come up here and I’ll try to make it better,” Magnus quipped.

Alec took a deep breath, shoving his unresolved anger down. He stood and joined Magnus on the bed. When he was ready to respond, he did his best to speak in a calmer voice, but it seemed to come out tinged with sadness. “I wish I could, Magnus, but I have things to do.”

“Yes, you do have things to do. Me,” Magnus snorted.

“No, look-” Alec faltered. He couldn’t tell Magnus again, could he? The last time he had confided in his loving boyfriend, he had been pushed away.

“What’s going on, Alexander?” Magnus asked, fret beginning to line his eyes.

“Magnus… I think time is repeating,” Alec finally divulged. He had to remind himself that even though he was the only one experiencing the repeated pain, he wasn’t the only one affected in this predicament.

Magnus raised one eyebrow, amused. Alec could tell that Magnus thought this was some kind of joke. Alec did his best to convey the grimness of the situation through his facial expression.

“Are you… you’re not serious, are you?” Magnus’ face of amusement slowly morphed into one of confusion.

“I am severely serious. Beyond serious. This is the fifth time I’ve woken up in this day,” Alec confided, “If you don’t believe me, your phone is going to ring any moment now. It’ll be a client wanting you to summon a demon.”

As if on command, the familiar ringtone that used to make Alec blush, when things were much simpler, sounded through the bedroom. Magnus appeared to be a mixture of impressed and horrified. He reached for the phone and suspiciously answered. “Hello?”

The client stated their requests, too quiet for Alec to listen in on. Magnus confirmed the theory aloud, though. “You want me… to summon a Kuri demon? Sorry, but I don’t think I can today.”

This time, Alec could hear the client’s response, angry and loud. “I pay to have your services, and you’re just going to tell me no? I need this done today! Consider this a demand!”

Magnus responded, his voice lacking his usual sureness. “Sorry. I wish I could help you. Perhaps another warlock can assist.” Magnus ended the call without another word to the angry client.

“Alexander, how did you know that would happen?” Magnus inquired.

“The same way I know that in a few moments I’m going to get alerts from the Institute about demon attacks. If neither of us go to fight, 34 Shadowhunters and 61 mundanes die. If only I go to fight, 26 Shadowhunters and 39 mundanes die.” Alec prematurely ended his predictions, a lump forming in his throat. He hadn’t thought about how much it hurt the first time he had lost Magnus. Seeing the death toll reports had been excruciating. It had only been four days ago, but it felt like months.

“And if we both fight?” Magnus asked, afraid to hear the answer.

The lump in Alec’s throat grew as he readied to answer. “12 Shadowhunters, 27 mundanes, 1 warlock.”

Alec’s phone buzzed with alerts of the demon attack. He showed his phone to Magnus as a way to prove his point.

The silence that hung in the air was heavy. Magnus interrupted the silence with a suggestion, his voice sounding more hopeful. “Well, then, we just won’t go to the Institute. Or, perhaps, I won’t go to the Institute, but you can.”

“No, Magnus. It doesn’t matter if you go to the Institute or not. You die if I’m here, if I leave, if I come back. No matter what I do, you end up dead at the end of the day,” Alec responded with frustration.

“So… you’re saying that you have seen me die four times?” Magnus’ eyes showed the pain Alec felt deep in his heart.

“No, not exactly. I’ve seen you die three times. The fourth time, you wouldn’t let me stay.” Alec answered.

“Alright,” Magnus said with a falter in his voice, “What’s the plan? What have you done over the last four days?”

“I’ve looked through all of the Institute's resources and nearly all of your books. There’s nothing. You even told me yourself that you had never heard of this kind of magic. I’m honestly at a loss,” Alec said with a hollow chuckle.

“We’ll finish going through my books. We do have the rest of the day if you don’t go to the Institute, right?” Magnus inquired, reaching his hand out to cup the side of Alec’s face. Magnus’ concern was growing, but Alec knew that Magnus would always prioritize Alec’s wellbeing over his own.

~*~*~

Alec let out an exasperated sigh as they set down the final book. Nothing, again. It felt like he would never find the right answer. He’d be stuck in this nightmare for the rest of his life. Well, Alec thought, if nothing else, there was failsafe. He could always somehow end his life and hopefully he would be released. With his luck, that wouldn’t be the case, though.

Magnus snapped him out of his trance. “Alright,” Magnus said, his usual charisma dripping in his words, “I’m going to see if I can detect any disturbances in my wards. Perhaps, another warlock has decided to exact revenge in a very cruel way.”

Magnus snapped his fingers and flourished his arms, his cobalt blue magic reaching into the wards. Alec was always enamored by Magnus’ magic. The way it spread from his fingertips like an extension of his body captured Alec’s attention every time, no matter how many times he had seen it. He watched the magic reach the wards and followed it back to the source; Magnus’ ring-adorned fingers. He admired his warlock’s fingers, thoroughly enjoying the subtle flicks they made as Magnus searched for answers. A flash of dark scarlet magic exuded from Magnus’ fingertips. As quickly as Alec had detected the small change in color, it disappeared.

“Magnus, stop!” Alec exclaimed. He couldn’t help but think this would be another way Magnus would die. Magnus’ magic retreated back into his fingers and Magnus looked at Alec inquisitively. “Did you not see that?”

“See what, Alexander?”

“The red magic that flashed in your hand. It was only there for half a second,” Alec warned breathlessly.

“Impossible. I have never, in my centuries of living, had red magic. I haven’t detected anyone else’s magic either, so that wouldn’t be an explanation either,” Magnus shrugged Alec off. Alec couldn’t tell if Magnus was being difficult on purpose, or if Magnus was just as scared as Alec was.

“I’ll look into it, though,” Magnus added as an afterthought after seeing the look on Alec’s face.

~*~*~

Magnus and Alec collapsed on the couch after a full day of research and experiments. There was no explanation for time being frozen. Alec was already considering his next day and what he would accomplish. He could visit the Spiral Labyrinth to see if they had any information, or perhaps the Idris library would have something. Catarina was another option, but he always hated to bother her since she had to deal with stupid mundanes all day. He even thought about asking the Fae for their assistance. They may be a little demented from time to time, but their knowledge on the ‘special’ things in nature could prove to be helpful.

“Alright,” Magnus said, as though he was having the same thoughts as Alec, “We need a plan for tomorrow since it’s nearly 5 o’clock. You’re going to wake up and tell me everything, including what you’ve already researched. Then, you’ll tell me we need to go directly to the Spiral Labyrinth and speak to Tessa Gray. She might know something.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” Alec said, lifting his head to look at Magnus. As he did, he caught movement in the corner of his eye. His reflexes caused him to stand quickly and reach for the glamoured seraph blade on his thigh. In a fighting stance, he inched towards the bedroom. He could have sworn there was a shadow that had moved past the mirror in the hallway leading there.

“Darling-” Alec cut off Magnus’ questions with a simple hand gesture. He didn’t want to alert the intruder of his knowledge.

He moved down the hallway and reached the mirror, where he had seen the movement. In his peripheral vision, he could see the shadow in the mirror again. He whipped to the side, where the shadow should be in the apartment and… nothing. He was sure he had seen something, unless the loop was genuinely pulling apart his mind.

“It must’ve been the lighting. Sorry,” Alec said to Magnus sheepishly.

“It’s quite alright, dear. You’re probably just tired. Have you actually felt like you got a good night’s rest since this all started?” Magnus asked as Alec returned to the couch.

“Not exactly. I wake up feeling perfectly fine, but it isn’t exactly like I slept. I don’t know how to explain it. It’s like one of those sleeps when you have to wake up extremely early. One second, you’re falling asleep and the very next your alarm is going off,” Alec told Magnus. He almost despised the way Magnus could make him think. He was trying his best to turn off all personal thoughts so he could figure this out.

“Why don’t you take a short nap? Just thirty minutes. While you’re sleeping, I’ll call a few of my contacts and see if they’ve ever heard of this magic,” Magnus suggested.

Alec battled with himself internally. On one hand, sleep sounded ethereal. On the other, he wouldn’t be alert to any danger headed Magnus’ way. He wouldn’t be able to protect Magnus to his full ability. “Do you promise you’ll stay close? And you won’t let me sleep any longer than 30 minutes?”

“I swear on my life,” Magnus responded, a sweet smile on his face. He brushed Alec’s hair off of his forehead while he stood up from his place on the couch and planted a gentle kiss on Alec’s head.

~*~*~

Alec’s ‘nap’, if you could even call it that, had been restless. He tossed and turned and was attacked by memories of Magnus lying dead in various places. He could barely tell if he had fallen asleep at any point. So, he decided to leave his place on the couch and find Magnus. It wasn’t difficult to find him in the kitchen, since he could hear Magnus’ whispered voice on the phone. Alec paused to listen in.

“No, Cat. I don’t think Alec is going crazy. I think this is serious… Yes, I realize that if someone is messing with time and reality there will be consequences… No, I haven’t pissed anyone off recently. Are you actually going to help, or are you only going to interrogate me?... Thank you. I don’t have anything on this, and Alec says that there’s nothing in the Institute either, so I appreciate you going through your library… Alright, let me know if you find anything.”

Alec entered the kitchen as he heard Magnus’ phone clatter onto the counter. When he turned the corner, he could see Magnus bent over the counter with both hands clutching the edges of the countertop. His head was hung. Alec couldn’t think of a time he had seen Magnus look more vulnerable.

Alec silently moved forward and reached his arms around Magnus’ waist. Magnus slightly jumped, barely perceptible, but enough for Alec to detect. Magnus stood and lifted his head, leaning it back to rest it on Alec’s shoulder.

“Catarina and Tessa are looking into it, but I’m at an impasse, Alexander,” Magnus sighed.

“Well, it’s only,” Alec paused to look at his watch, shocked by the results, “7:30? Magnus, you promised you’d only let me sleep for thirty minutes! It’s been two and a half hours!”

“It was obvious you weren’t getting good rest, so I had to let you sleep as long as possible,” Magnus responded innocently.

“No, Magnus, I have less than three hours to get out of this. I don’t think you get it.” Alec furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms.

“No, I don’t get it. I’m not reliving anything. Yesterday was completely normal for me. What I do get is that you’re in pain and you shouldn’t be shouldering this by yourself,” Magnus said, reaching out for Alec again, “I didn’t let the last couple of hours go to waste. I called people and tried to get answers, but no one knew anything. I even tapped into the ley lines and there’s no unidentifiable magic in the city. I think it would be best if we just spent the next couple of hours together. If what you’re saying is true, we can start up again tomorrow with fresh ideas. We’ll visit the Spiral Labyrinth and figure it out.”

Alec accepted Magnus’ reach and wrapped his arms around Magnus as well. It took a lot for Alec to admit that he couldn’t keep working this case. He had been raised to finish a case no matter how many sleepless nights and harsh fights it took. Magnus had somehow broken those standards down and over time had convinced Alec it was sometimes for the best to take a break.

“Alright, fine. I’m not going to stop thinking about it, though,” Alec said stubbornly.

“Let me give you something else to think about, then,” Magnus said. A tantalizing grin appeared on his face. He pulled away from Alec’s embrace and held one ring-adorned hand out to his Shadowhunter. One eyebrow lifted, as if he was daring Alec to say no.

Alec rolled his eyes but grinned along with Magnus. He grabbed Magnus’ outstretched hand and Magnus led him to the bedroom.

Before they could reach the bedroom, Alec was already diving into Magnus’ lips. They stumbled back into the bedroom, both reaching for the other’s clothes to pull them off. Magnus truly did have a way of taking Alec’s mind off of any horrible situation he found himself in.

~*~*~

Alec could feel himself drifting off in Magnus’ arms, no matter how hard he tried to fight it. He couldn’t let himself fall asleep because he knew what was coming soon. He glanced at his watch through droopy eyes. 8:49.

He had a little bit of time, maybe it wouldn’t be the worst thing if he fell asleep. It was always a battle to stay awake in Magnus’ arms. Magnus must have felt the same way, because Alec could feel his breathing slow, and muscles relax next to him. Alec knew he wouldn’t win this battle.

Alec slowly allowed himself to succumb to his drowsiness. He could feel the warm blanket of rest engulfing him and it felt incredible to fall asleep next to Magnus for the first time in days.

~*~*~

Alec's eyes fluttered open, terrified that he would be awake on the bedroom floor once again. He was relieved to find Magnus sleeping soundly beside him. He checked his watch, as if on command now. 9:53. Oh god. Any minute now, Magnus would die somehow. At least he woke up in time to protect him.

He reached out to wake Magnus. He didn’t feel like it would be right to allow Magnus to wake up to an attack. He should be at the ready, too. After Magnus didn’t wake from the first shake, Alec’s heart rate spiked. He could feel his anxiety course through his body.

Alec shook a little harder and received no response again but could feel shallow breaths coming from Magnus. He turned Magnus and saw cat eyes open in fear and blood dripping from the corner of his mouth. It had to have happened in the last few minutes, the blood wasn’t dried.

“He’s still here,” Magnus managed to choke out.

Alec shot out of bed to find the culprit. He grabbed his bow and arrow from beside the bed and ran into the living room. He saw the figure he had seen a couple of nights before, shrouded by a cloak. A red portal was open in front of the figure, but the person turned around as he was about to enter the portal. Alec tried his best to get a look at the person’s face but couldn’t see much behind the large hood of the cloak. A glimmer of gold peered out from the shadows.

He pulled an arrow into his bow but couldn’t release it. The golden eyes that had met Alec’s eyes looked far too similar to eyes that he loved. The portal closed before Alec could look any closer to confirm his suspicion. Alec dropped to his knees, devastated that he couldn’t avenge his lover’s death once again.

He quickly remembered Magnus, suffering in the bedroom. He rushed down the hall leading to the bedroom, rushing past the mirror that had bothered him earlier that day. He glanced at it out of curiosity, sure there was something more to what he had seen. A shadow, his own shadow in fact, seemed to be out of sync.

It felt like there were pieces of a puzzle that Alec should be putting together. The loop, the golden eyes looking back at him, the shadows moving through the mirror, the odd magic he had seen come out of Magnus’ hands. There were too many odd things going on during this iteration of reality. Unless, this wasn’t reality. The loop did seem to be shifting, things within it shifting.

Before Alec could piece anymore together, the world around him turned to black. The figure stood within the blackness Alec was engulfed by, golden eyes aflame. They were so similar to Magnus’, yet there were slight inconsistencies. It felt almost uncanny to be looking into these eyes. He should know them so well, but they weren’t quite his warlock’s eyes.

The figure faded with everything else, and Alec was met with another sleepless dormancy before he had to face this day again.

Chapter Text

Alec woke with a pounding in his head. The harsh disorientation of his visions from the night prior clouded his brain. He brushed it off and instantly opened his eyes, just to see Magnus hanging over the bed as expected. However, Alec’s senses went on high alert. Something was off. The way the light fell on Magnus’ face, the position of his shoulders. It was barely perceptible, but Alec had this image memorized by now, and this wasn’t it. He tried his best to ignore this feeling as Magnus gave him an aloof grin from above. Before he could even begin speaking, Alec answered the question that was hanging on Magnus’ lips.

“No, the floor is not very comfy. Yes, you did get hardwood,” Alec said with no amusement.

Magnus’ brows furrowed, confusion deep in his face. “How-”

Alec cut him off once again, his voice still gravelly even though he hadn’t truly slept. “This is now my sixth morning living through this day. I’m stuck in a time loop. There’s no information in your library, in the Institute, or anywhere else. The ley lines aren’t corrupted and there’s no odd magic in the area.”

Alec sat up from the hard floor beneath him. He brought his knees to his chest and rested his arms across them. In this position, he couldn’t make eye contact with Magnus, and, thus, couldn’t see the concern and confusion he knew Magnus would feel. He didn’t have the capacity for emotions today. Alec needed to avoid the confusion, pity, and fear he knew he would see in his lover’s eyes. He needed to figure out who was causing this.

“If what you’re saying is true, there are major consequences in the continuity of time. I have never heard of such a thing,” Magnus responded carefully.

“I know. That’s why we’re going to the Spiral Labyrinth. Get up, we don’t have much time,” Alec said while he stood from his spot on the floor.

Alec grabbed a pair of black jeans from the floor and hurriedly pulled them over his legs. Magnus began to slowly get out of bed, but still maintained the confused look on his face. He couldn’t help but express exactly what he was thinking through his facial expressions. Unfortunately, Alec had become quite the study of these expressions. He knew what nearly every single one meant. This one meant that Magnus was genuinely questioning Alec’s sanity. Luckily, Alec had an excuse to look away. He reached for the shirt he had worn the day prior and pulled it over his head.

~*~*~

Magnus and Alec stepped out of the portal side by side and into the Spiral Labyrinth. Alec allowed himself to be entranced by the room they stepped into for a moment. It appeared to be neither an indoor space, nor an outdoor space. The ceiling was dotted with stars that shot across the sky and brighter than any stars Alec had seen in New York or Idris. A small creek ran through the middle of the room with a romantic bridge that crossed to the other side, where a willow tree towered towards the sky. Lace, perfectly intermixed with purple velvet curtains, covered what Alec could only guess were windows, but he couldn’t quite make out where the room ended and outside would be. Books lined these mystic walls, but not encased in shelves. Rather, they seemed to be floating of their own accord. In fact, now that Alec had noticed the books, they seemed to be scattered all around the room. Stacks of books lined the bridge, the banks of the creek, and the trunk of the willow tree. Alec had never seen anything quite so incredible, even in Alicante. Comparing Alicante to this would be like comparing perfect, plain stainless steel to ornate wrought iron. Both beautiful, but one much more surgical than the other.

“This is amazing,” Alec whispered, lamely. He felt that no words could do his thoughts justice.

“Thank you,” Magnus responded, “This would be my office.” He spread his arms and gestured to the area.

“I didn’t even know warlocks had offices,” Alec commented.

Magnus directed Alec across the bridge as he continued to take in the magnificence of the vast room. They crossed the bridge and neared one of the sets of Victorian curtains. The curtain spread as it sensed Magnus come near and an opening appeared in the wall.

They entered the corridor, and Magnus turned to the left. Alec followed, while still admiring everything around him. The corridors weren’t nearly as awe inspiring as Magnus’ office, but incredible nonetheless. He wondered if many Shadowhunters had entered these halls before him.

After five minutes of walking in what felt like circles, Magnus stopped and faced a brick wall, muttering to himself. “It should be around here, I just haven’t been here in about a decade.”

Golden magic flowed out of his hands and penetrated the wall before him. Alec detected the few sparks of red that exited Magnus’ fingertips along with the typical golden magic, but didn’t mention it. It was still early. The wall before them opened up into another door. This one led to a room that echoed sterility like the entirety of Alicante, but in a much more archaic manner. The books and scrolls scattered around the room gave the room a little hospitality, but Alec could feel the heaviness of the magic in the room.

A woman rounded the corner and Alec instinctively pushed Magnus behind him. “Who are you?” Alec’s Shadowhunter reflexes almost asked the woman what business she had, but he knew this wasn’t the appropriate place to be asking such questions. He was the intruder.

“Well, I would ask the same, but I am fairly certain that you would be Alexander Lightwood, correct?” The woman glanced at Magnus and added under her breath, “Ragnor was right, he is a spitting image of Will.”

“Yes, I’m Alec, and you are Tessa Gray?” Alec questioned, not letting his guard down.

“Yes. It’s nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you,” Tessa said kindly, “And Magnus, it’s wonderful to see you after so many years. You look well.”

Magnus moved around his defensive Shadowhunter to embrace Tessa. “It is always a pleasure to be in your presence, my dear. I’m sorry I haven’t been to visit, New York has been a handful.”

“I hate to be the bearer of bad news during our first meeting, Tessa, but we need your help. I’ve lived the same day about six times now, and I’m seriously starting to hate this day,” Alec interrupted.

Tessa’s expression darkened slightly and her tone became serious. “Of course, I received Magnus’ fire message and if what you are saying is true, we are dealing with incredibly dark magic. Whoever is doing this to you has absolutely no concern for the continuity of time. I am not of much help, but the Spiral Council may be able to detect the magic we are dealing with, which would give us a starting point.”

“Whatever it takes.”

~*~*~

The trio entered a room that Tessa explained housed the Spiral Council. The Council did most of their work and research in this room and held trials in the center. There was a pentagram located in the center of the room, which Magnus pointed at and told Alec that was where they would likely do their inspection.

The Council itself consisted of five robed warlocks sitting at desks that reached at least 10 feet in the air. Alec glanced at the windows behind the Council, which rose at least double the height of the desk, and noticed there was only grey fog outside of them. Tessa approached the warlocks and spoke. “Council, we would like to request your assistance in a case regarding High Warlock of Brooklyn, Magnus Bane, and the Head of the New York Institute, Alexander Gideon Lightwood.”

Alec moved his head closer to Magnus and whispered, “How does she know my middle name?” Magnus hushed Alec promptly.

“The case itself is quite perplexing and there are no resources to be found. Mr. Lightwood appears to be trapped in a time loop that involves the death of Mr. Bane at the conclusion of each day. Mr. Lightwood wakes again to find Mr. Bane alive and with no memory of the previous day. I would like to request that the Council inspect Mr. Lightwood and Mr. Bane for any traces of foreign magic.”

The Council murmured between themselves for a moment before the one seated in the middle responded, “We will do this. Mr. Bane, please enter the pentagram. Mr. Lightwood, you will follow thereafter.”

~*~*~

“There is no foreign magic detected within Mr. Bane, only his own magic,” The Councilmember that had agreed to do the inspection reported to Alec and Tessa. “Mr. Lightwood, you may step forth.”

Alec stepped into the pentagram as Magnus exited. Magnus grasped Alec’s bicep and gave him a small smile, “It’s going to be okay, darling. We’ll figure it out no matter what.”

Alec nodded and continued to the center. The ‘talker’ of the Council, as Alec liked to think of him, rejoined the edge of the pentagram. The Council’s magic joined together to surround the circle, a composite of their different magic’s colors. None of the colors stood out to Alec the way Magnus’ golden magic did. The strands of magic joined at the center and touched Alec’s chest, just above his heart and surrounded him fully. Gold gently leaped into the composite from Alec’s chest and made its way back into the fingertips of each Councilmember. The entire composite pulled away from Alec to return to the Council shortly behind the golden magic that had appeared just before. Before the composite could make its entire way back, a red pulse erupted from Alec and crashed into the magic before them. The warlocks stumbled back at the force. When the magics met, they burnt each other out quickly.

Alec, out of breath and shocked, spoke up in the silence, “What did that mean?”

The ‘talker’ spoke, “The golden magic is as foreseen. That was Mr. Bane’s magical signature. Nothing lies amiss. However, the red magic is an… anomaly to say the least. This magic is different…” He paused, carefully pondering his next words, “Much different than anything we have ever seen.”

The silent Councilmembers nodded in agreement. Alec glanced at Magnus, looking for reassurance, but was met with the same worry and fear that he felt. His gaze returned to the Councilmembers as they returned to their desks. The ‘talker’ cleared his throat to begin speaking again.

“The red magic bears such likeness to Mr. Bane’s own craft that one cannot distinguish the true source. It is as though the magics have intertwined. Where one ceases, the other commences,” The Councilmember turned his attention to Magnus, “Mr. Bane, you have brought a Shadowhunter where none of his kind has tread before. While punishment is customary, the Council has chosen to forgo judgement upon one condition. This matter must be resolved immediately. Time is not a toy for mortal or immortal hands. It is a fragile force that can cause the world’s end. We expect to hear word when this comes to an end. Mr. Lightwood will return with you.”

Magnus nodded and ushered Alec to exit the room. As the door shut behind them, Tessa looked at Magnus with wide eyes.

“Don’t say it, dear. I already know,” Magnus dismissed. Alec felt as though there was a silent communication that he could not decode, despite looking at both of their faces to decipher their grim appearances.

“Magnus, you always did have a habit for finding trouble. It appears this habit is not easily broken,” Tessa said gently, her eyes betrayed by concern that only an old friend knows. “You can’t ignore this. They clearly suspect you or they would have given you more information. If you don’t figure this out quickly, they’ll come for you. And Alec,” Tessa admonished Magnus, glancing over at Alec.

As she finished her sentence, the walls around them began to rumble. Alec saw a shadow flicker down the hallway, which caused Alec to quickly get between the threat and Magnus. He peered down the hallway, but couldn’t see anything else odd. As he continued to scan the area, his vision seemed to slowly close in on itself. He felt the ceiling get farther away and could hear Magnus, although very muffled, yell his name.

~*~*~

Alec’s vision was completely black, but a familiar voice came from somewhere in front of him. “Alexander, please stop.”

Alec tried to open his eyes to find where the voice was coming from, but the blackness continued on. He responded instead, “Magnus? Stop what?”

Shrouded eyes appeared before him, the same golden eyes that he had seen before they had entered the portal the night before. Sinister versions of the beautiful cat eyes he had fallen in love with. As Alec examined them more, he realized these eyes weren’t exactly sinister. Rather, they looked exhausted, yet still determined. Grief stricken with a plan to fix the pain.

“You need to stop looking. Accept this and it will all end.”

Chapter Text

The air around Alec felt heavy as he came to his senses. He peeked one eye open to see Magnus above him, as always. Yet, again, the sight was slightly shifted to his left. He could feel something in the loop was shifting, but he no longer had the energy to wonder why.

He closed his eyes again and allowed his thoughts to drift. He didn’t understand what had happened the day prior. He knew the voice that spoke to him was Magnus. But why? Why would Magnus be telling him to quit looking? As far as Alec knew, Magnus had no idea what was going on outside of what Alec had told him. There should be no reason for Magnus to ask Alec to give up. Not so soon. Maybe it was for the best, maybe Magnus knew something that Alec didn’t. Which, Alec thought, wouldn’t be difficult since he knew nothing about the situation.

Magnus made his usual comments and Alec grunted in response. He didn’t even bother to reopen his eyes or pull himself out of his thoughts.

“Alexander, are you planning on staying down there for the rest of the day?” Magnus asked as he reached down to the floor to touch Alec’s hand.

Alec shooed his hand away and stood. He climbed into bed and decided that the heavy air around him was telling him that getting up was not worth it. He curled up under the satin sheets and faced away from Magnus, afraid that his face would betray his feelings. Alec had always thought that he was good at masking his feelings, but Magnus had a way of knowing no matter what.

“Alec, are you okay?” Magnus reached an arm around Alec and scooted in closer.

“Fine,” Alec responded with little conviction.

Magnus continued to question Alec, asking if he had gotten hurt when he fell or if there was some paperwork he was dreading, but Alec didn’t respond to any questions. He simply kept his eyes closed and attempted to sleep again.

Alec’s phone buzzed, but he ignored it. Towards the final few rings, Magnus picked it up to see an incoming call from Isabelle. He answered and told Izzy that Alec wasn’t feeling well. After much worry from Izzy, Magnus finally ended the call and Alec heard him return the phone to the spot it sat on the nightstand.

Magnus’ phone was next to ring, but Alec didn’t bother to stop Magnus. He knew what was going to happen.

Magnus answered and listened to the client on the other end request a demon summoning. Alec was expecting Magnus to accept as he had the first time. However, he heard Magnus quietly respond with, “I’m sorry, I don’t think I can today. I have personal matters to attend to.”

Magnus ended the call before the client could begin his rampage and returned to his spot against Alec’s back.

The minutes seemed to pass by like hours in Alec’s mind. He couldn’t stop his mind from trying to come up with solutions. He couldn’t just accept the death of his lover. He needed to do something to fix it. Alec would tear the world apart if it meant making things right for those he cared about. This time felt different, though. It felt like there was no solution. No seam in the universe that Alec could begin to tear apart. For the first time in his life, Alec felt completely and utterly defenseless.

Another phone call came through on Magnus’ phone. Alec almost let it disturb him, as it hadn’t happened before, but his limbs felt too heavy to move. Nothing seemed to matter anymore.

Magnus stepped into the living room to answer the call and Alec felt like he could finally breathe again. This feeling of relief didn’t last long, as Magnus stepped back into the room moments later.

“Alec, it’s for you,” Magnus said, his voice just above a whisper.

Alec did not respond.

Magnus spoke again, “Alec. I think you want to take this phone call. It’s Tessa Gray and she is asking for you specifically. She said she has intel for you, but I don’t know what it is about.” Magnus said. He then added as a disgruntled afterthought, “She won’t tell me.”

Alec sat up quickly. Tessa? Calling him? He couldn’t let himself get his hopes up, out of fear that it was completely unrelated to the situation at hand. “Maybe it’s about the demon attack on the Institute,” Alec suggested, mostly to himself.

Magnus looked at him quizzically. Shit. Magnus hadn’t told him about the demon attack and Alec definitely did not answer that phone call. Alec hoped that Magnus would ignore this, but he was sure that it would be brought up again later.

Alec reached out for the phone, waving his hand for Magnus to hurry and hand it over. As soon as the phone hit his ear, Alec frantically answered, “Hello? This is Alec.”

A gentle voice came across from the other line, “Hi, Alec. My name is Tessa Gray, I’m sure Magnus has mentioned me once or twice. He has mentioned you to me more than that.”

Alec couldn’t help but think how odd it was that he had met her in person, but she would never know. “Yes, Magnus has told me stories.”

A small, charming laugh echoed from Tessa. “Only good ones, I hope. Look, although I would love to spend time getting to know you, I need to tell you incredibly important information. I hope there is something you can do with it.”

“Okay, what is it?” Alec was getting more anxious by the minute. He glanced up at Magnus to see that he had picked up on the anxiety and wanted to know what was going on.

“Well, first, you need to be away from Magnus when we talk about this. How about I tell you my phone number and we get off the phone? When Magnus inevitably asks what we discussed, you tell him it had something to do with an intel request from the Clave and I would only give the information to you. You have to go to the Institute to write a report to the Clave. Then, once you leave, give me a call and we’ll actually talk. But, since I’m sure Magnus is standing over you right now, just thank me for gathering that information and that you’ll be writing to the Clave. Put on your best diplomat voice,” Tessa’s longwinded idea finally came to an end. Alec sat in a moment of silence, trying to decide if he liked the idea of lying directly to his boyfriend. He hoped this would lead to the end of this time loop, so the decision was made for him.

Alec cleared his throat and tried to remember what it was like to be a Shadow world political leader. “Tessa, thank you for gathering that information. I completely understand your hesitation regarding delivering the information directly to the Clave. I will write a report that will be sent directly to the Inquisitor. Would you like to remain nameless in this exchange?”

“That was perfect. My number is 801-439-6074. Got that?” Tessa responded.

“Yes, thank you again,” Alec replied in his best diplomatic voice. He heard the dial tone click and handed the phone back to Magnus.

As both Alec and Tessa expected, Magnus dove right into the interrogation. “What was that about? The Clave requested information from the Spiral Labyrinth? Why didn’t you tell me? I probably could have gotten you the same information.”

“I had no idea they requested information, but I have to head over to the Institute to get this out to the Inquisitor as soon as I can. It’s something about a greater demon and warlock that the Las Vegas Institute has been tracking,” Alec answered as vaguely as he could. He stood, pulling on his clothes with a restless urgency.

“Would you like me to accompany you? There was that demon attack going on at the Institute that you magically knew about without being told, so perhaps I could be of help,” Magnus said, trying to get Alec to make eye contact with him.

Alec cringed while faced away from Magnus. He knew that was going to come up in conversation, but he chose to ignore it. Alec waved his hand dismissively and grabbed his bow and quiver from their spot next to the bed. “No, don’t worry about it, Magnus. Izzy and Jace have the attack under control. I’ll be in and out in no time.”

He placed a kiss on Magnus’ forehead as he headed for the bedroom door. He reached out with his right hand to twist the doorknob, but froze as Magnus sternly spoke. “Alec, stop. I don’t know what you’re lying about, but it had better be important. If you walk out that door, there may not be any coming back from this. I hope that you are thinking clearly about this.”

Alec closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes again, he didn’t bother turning around to look at Magnus. He knew he would see the hurt on his face. “I’m not lying. I’ll see you later, okay?”

Alec turned the doorknob and walked out of the loft, leaving Magnus standing in the bedroom, dumbfounded.

~*~*~

Alec found a small coffee shop that he had never heard of to step into. The interior was dark and mostly lit by string lights hanging from every surface imaginable. The walls were a dark wood that matched the tables perfectly. There was music playing to drown out the sounds of conversation and few enough people sitting at tables that he wasn’t too concerned about eavesdroppers. He stopped at the counter to order an iced americano and chose a booth at the very back of the coffee shop.

As he sat there, waiting for his coffee to show up, he checked his phone for any updates on the Institute. This was the first time in days that he had even thought about the demon attack his siblings were taking on. There was no official Clave news, but there were at least a dozen texts from Izzy and Jace asking if he was okay. There was even one from Clary letting him know that she was there for him if he needed anything.

His coffee had appeared in front of him at some point when he was reading through these text messages, so now it was time to call Tessa. He typed in the number that he had memorized and pressed the call button. It rang a few times before the same voice picked up with a suspicious “Hello?”.

“Hey, Tessa? It’s Alec.”

“Oh, perfect. I’m going to skip the pleasantries and get right into this. The Spiral Labyrinth has been feeling the effects of some kind of temporal disturbance all day. I was tasked at looking into it, so I cast a spell that was meant to essentially wash out any malignant magic that was latching onto time. Except some magical force fought back against me, so I wasn’t able to solve the problem entirely. I only somewhat solved the problem for me. I can only remember bits and pieces of every time, but I’ve lived through the same day quite a few times now, except one day was different. Yesterday, you and Magnus came to visit the Spiral Labyrinth. So, I was thinking you must be connected to this somehow,” Tessa said quickly.

Alec let out a breathy chuckle. It was not a wholehearted laugh, but probably the closest he had been to finding something funny in days. “Connected is an understatement, Tessa.”

“Oh, thank goodness. Well, I’m sorry to hear that for your sake, but I’m glad someone knows something about this. I–”

Alec cut Tessa off. “Wait. I don’t know anything. I know that I’ve relived the same day over and over, but I have no idea why.”

“Well, luckily for you, I have access to a library with thousands of historical scrolls and books. I was looking for anything on this, with the help of a few other warlocks, and I found something. There was a theory that if a warlock channeled enough power, there could be serious consequences within time and space. Especially if the warlock is feeling strong enough emotions. I don’t know how, but I believe Magnus is at the root of this all,” Tessa explained, clearing up most of Alec’s confusion.

“So, are you saying that Magnus is powerful enough to change time?” Alec doubted this to be true. He knew Magnus was powerful, but couldn’t possibly believe his sweet boyfriend to be powerful enough to, or even want to, change time.

“No, dear. I think that Magnus may be working with his father. I don’t know if it’s by choice or not, but I can’t imagine there being any other possibility,” Tessa said, with a knowing sadness to her voice. Alec knew Magnus hadn’t told him everything about his relationship with his father, but surely Tessa knew it all. She was probably there for most of it. Sometimes, it stung to know that there were other people in the world that knew his love better than he did.

“Oh. So, how can I fix this? Kill Asmodeus? Could I convince Magnus to stop?” Alec asked, mostly considering the options to himself.

“I think that our best bet is talking to the Magnus that is causing this. However, I don’t think it is going to be the Magnus either of us spoke to this morning. According to the theory, the warlock could potentially come forwards or backwards in time to choose a timeframe to manipulate. This could be a version of Magnus who has never met you or a version of him that has lived without you for centuries. We have no way of knowing.”

“I think this version of Magnus knows me. He spoke to me yesterday and told me to quit looking. I think it’ll be safe enough to talk to him. The only way I know of getting that chance though is to tell the current Magnus that something weird is going on. Every time I involve Magnus, the universe seems to know that I’m catching on and there’s… ripples,” Alec explained to Tessa, unsure of how to explain it.

Tessa quickly interjected, though, before Alec had the opportunity to further explain the ripples. “I don’t know if that’s a great idea. There’s a chance that you completely upset the Magnus that is causing this and he ends everything. Then, you have absolutely no chance of saving this reality.”

“Great. So, all I need to do is track down a time traveling warlock that may or may not be my boyfriend, convince him to end the time loop that he’s trapped me in, and restore the timeline. Sounds simple,” Alec sighed. He wondered to himself if he would ever have a quiet life that simply consisted of work and coming home to his loving boyfriend. “You know what? I’m not playing games. I’m talking to Magnus, my Magnus. He deserves to know what is going on.’

“Alec, I don’t–” Tessa began.

Alec cut her off before she could finish, “You don’t think it’s a good idea. Sorry, Tessa, but I have to. If it doesn’t work we won’t know anyway. But you have to know that I would tear this world apart– I would tear apart time itself– if it means saving Magnus. Thanks for your help. I’ll call you with an update hopefully.”

Alec pulled the phone away from his ear and ended the call. He stood up from his table, leaving behind an unfinished cup of coffee.

~*~*~

Alec gently knocked on the door of the loft. He was afraid that Magnus wouldn’t answer. After all, he had told him there may not be anything to return to if he walked out the door. Loneliness was overtaking Alec, making it difficult to continue. No one close to him understood exactly what he was going through and Magnus was often his confidant. The one person he could trust to understand exactly what he was going through, even if he hadn’t been through it. This time, Alec didn’t truly believe that Magnus understood and he was afraid of telling him again. It never seemed to work out well, but he knew it needed to be done.

The door in front of him opened slowly and Magnus looked around the corner. “I warned you about walking out the door, Alec.”

“I know, Magnus, but please let me explain. I–” Magnus cut Alec off before he could even begin explaining.

“No, Alec. I’m not stupid and you treated me as such. I’m not really interested in hearing any excuses right now.” Magnus’s voice was cold and detached.

“There aren’t any excuses, just the truth. I swear. If you want the truth, just let me in,” Alec pleaded with Magnus.

Magnus stood there for a moment before closing the door. Alec dejectedly dropped his head and stared at his feet. Before he could pity himself for long, though, he heard the sound of the chain lock being dropped and the door before him swung completely open. Magnus stood on the other side of the door, one arm gesturing Alec to come inside and an unimpressed look plastered across his face.

~*~*~

Alec had explained everything to Magnus, and could already see shifts and changes in the folds of the universe. There were shadows in places there shouldn’t be and reflections in the mirrors that didn’t exist in the real world. His head felt dizzy and he could feel his vision fading in the corners. Alec fought against these feelings as hard as he could. He pinched the bridge of his nose to counteract the raging headache that was quickly coming over him.

Magnus didn’t seem to notice the internal battle Alec was fighting. Instead, he asked, “Why are you just now telling me this?’ His voice contained heavy hints of betrayal and was barely above a whisper.

“I thought there was nothing I could–” Alec began to answer, but before he could finish, the world in front of him went completely black again.

~*~*~

In the blackness, Alec could see the cat eyes he had seen before. Almost familiar, but not the same as the ones he loved. The eyes were staring directly at him, piercing through his soul. Magnus’s voice came from the direction of the eyes.

“What do you think you’re doing, Alec? I told you to quit looking.”

Magnus, whatever version of him this was, sounded angry. However, Alec thought to himself, this wasn’t an anger he had heard from Magnus in arguments or even with clients. This anger was much different than anything Alec had experienced from him, but he couldn’t quite place it.

“No, Magnus,” Alec responded, “Why are you doing this? You’re the one making me fight to keep you.”

“Don’t be dense, darling,” Magnus said with a bite that hurt Alec. Alec could tell Magnus didn’t harbor any love behind the word darling.

“If you know me, you know that I’m not being dense. I am simply doing what I do best and that is tearing the world apart to protect my family. Please, Magnus, stop this. If you love me, or ever loved me, you would stop this torture.”

“Oh, but that is exactly the point, Alec. I loved you far too much. That is why I started this. There has never been a version of me that deserved you and this becomes clearer with each century that goes by,” Magnus responded with dry humor in his voice.

“Centuries? How long have you been without me?”

“Give or take 320 years,” Magnus answered, waving away the question, “It’s not important. What is important is that you give up. Let me finish this how it should have gone to begin with. I will repair the mistake I made in this time loop, and you will never even know it occurred. You will return to the first day of the loop. I can’t do that with you fighting back. It’s difficult enough to deal with this time magic, and you going around changing the fabric of time every day is not helping.”

“And how exactly was this supposed to end?” Alec was afraid he didn’t want to know the answer.

“Well, for you, it should have ended on day one. Your loving boyfriend dies in a freak demon attack, you mourn him and eventually move on when you meet the right Shadowhunter, or whatever other mortal your heart desires, blah blah blah, happy ending. For your Magnus, me I suppose, it would not end. He relives his death over and over, and no matter what he attempts, he will not be able to escape it.”

“That isn’t a happy ending for either of us, Magnus. You don’t get to decide this for me,” Alec said, his voice breaking.

Magnus sighed, the centuries of grief evident. “It’s exactly the same as if I had broken up with you, Alec. Except I was too selfish to do so, and I can’t make that change. This is my final act of love to you. Allowing you to find someone that you can grow old with. I will not strip you of that chance.”

“I don’t want that,” Alec snapped, “I don’t want anything or anyone except for you. Why don’t you get it? Shadowhunters love once and love fiercely. I will never move on if you don’t stop this.”

For a long moment, Magnus simply looked at Alec. Magnus’s expression slowly softened, and Alec could see glimpses of his Magnus returning to him. He could see the Magnus that laughed a little too loudly, loved his people fiercely, and somehow kissed with impossible gentleness. The moment passed, and the sharpness returned to Magnus’s face, but this time at half force.

“I can’t stop it, even if I wanted to. My magic is now bound to you and there is nothing I can do about it. I’m trying to redirect my magic, though. You don’t deserve to relive this grief, but I do.”

Alec blinked. “You what? You think you deserve this? You don’t, Magnus. You deserve to live, and I deserve to have the man I love by my side while I grow old. Regardless of if he is growing old with me. There has to be something you can do. Fight against your magic, fight against your father if he’s involved, do whatever you have to do, but please don’t take this love away from me.”

“My father has nothing to do with this. My magic is just a form of my subconscious. The only thing that would change what is occurring is if my mind was changed,” Magnus paused as if he was considering what he had just said, “You’re the only thing that could change this.”

Light began to seep through cracks in the darkness, reality seeping into this world of Magnus’s creation.

“Go back, Alec. You may be able to change things but know that if I am able to redirect my magic, you will forget this ever happened.”