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“What do you mean you’ve never seen Star Trek! Do you live under a rock?!!” Garrison Specter exclaimed indignantly as his friend only blushed at the other side of the kitchen counter.
“Well,” Abigail Caffrey blushed and studied her shoes. “I tried to last year but my dad and Clinton have... conflicting views. They started arguing about Kirk vs. Pickard and Clinton ended up sleeping on the couch for a week, I nearly got caught twice. After that I decided it would be best if Star Trek in general was banished from the apartment.”
“So, let me get this straight. You have deprived yourself, willingly, of the entertainment gold that is Star Trek because you don't want to risk getting caught editing one of my essays?”
“What? No, Dad doesn't care about that. I was doing literary reviews."
“Oh, wait, was it a review for one of your classes or one of the ones for The Times?”
“The Times. My NYU stuff only ever takes like an hour to do.”
“I suppose it helps that you’ve read all the books. So, back to the subject of Star Trek, you need to watch it.”
“Right, and what are you doing?” Abigail watched as Garrison pulled out his phone and started texting furiously.
“Texting my dads, I demand family movie night.” Garrison looked up from his phone and grinned a mischievous grin but Abigail was unperturbed.
“Gar, we haven't had a “family” movie night since we were fourteen and you spilled my Pepsi all over Satchmo.”
“Exactly. It’s been two years since we combined the epicness that are teams Burke, Caffrey and Specter-Ross. I go back to Boston is three days! We need this! Please...”
“You just texted that to your dads, didn't you?”
“Yours too.”
“You are such a law student and, possibly, the most obnoxious sixteen year old I’ve ever met.”
“I’m not the one who corrects her Shakespearean Lit. professor mid lecture.”
“That’s because they don't offer Shakespearean Lit. at Harvard, thou loggerheaded fool-born clotpole.”
“Ok, see that? How am I the obnoxious sixteen year old when you're the one going around spouting Shakespearean insults?!”
“Because I’m also the one who has to study Shakespeare in order to avoid being discredited by the entire, world wide, literary community. It’s like you write one critically acclaimed review of Romeo and Juliet and they’re all over you cause you happen to be 15 years old. Can we just drop the subject now? What did you dads say about movie night?”
“They’re cool with it, yours?” Abby rolled her eyes and checked her phone, glaring at Garrison. “Yes, Gar. My dad and Clinton are both free for movie night but neither are pleased that they had to hear about it from ‘my cousin’. Thanks for that.”
Garrison smiled cheekily at his best friend. “Your welcome Abbs. So should we get pizza or chinese for dinner?”
“Neither, Italian.”
“Absolutely not!”
Garrison and Abby fought about the merits of their prefered takeout until Elle Burke showed up and kicked them both out of the kitchen saying “I am going to take every chance to use this beautiful kitchen that I get. Besides, Peter and the boys just finished a week long stake out and they could use a home cooked meal.” To which she received a simultaneous “Yes Mrs. Burke.”
Later that night.
Neal, Peter and Clinton met Harvey and Mike in the lobby of Pearson Hardman at the end of the day and they all piled into Clinton’s standard black Sedan. The ride to the condo was quiet and none of the men were prepared for the commotion inside. It wasn’t so much the shouting from Abigail and Garrison that surprised anyone nor was it the fact they were chasing each other around the living room, what they weren’t prepared for was Elizabeth having joined in the chase and each of them waving a different movie at the others.
Peter tried to get his wife’s attention but to no avail, Harvey tried using his courtroom voice to catch Garrisons focus with no result. Finally Neal stepped forward and, very quietly, spoke.
“Abigail Petunia Caffrey.”
Abby whipped around to face her father, causing Garrison to run into her.
“Yes daddy?”
“Your middle name is Petunia?”
“What are you doing?”
Abbi crushed Gar's toe under her heel and replied “Trying to pick a movie for movie night.”
“Uh-huh, and what are our choices?”
“Umm, well... they’re all Star Trek. I want to watch Wrath of Khan, Gar wants First Contact and Mrs. Burke wants to watch The Voyage Home.”
“Right,” Neal turned to the other four men and motioned towards the kitchen. “Gentlemen, sidebar.”
As the men went into the kitchen to privately discuss the movie choices Abby and Garrison settled down on the couch to bicker between themselves and Elle started picking up the pillows and empty glasses that had been strewn about during their epic chase.
In the kitchen, the men arranged themselves as if in a courtroom. Neal and Mike stood to one end of the kitchen island while Harvey and Clinton stood on the other end, both teams strategising. Peter, ever the impartial judge, sat opposite both teams with a cutting board and a meat mallet.
“Alright,” Mike turned to his friend and fellow (ex)con. “We need a plan of attack. Harvey and Clint have us totally beat on logic and reason, so what do we do?”
“Well, it’s pretty clear Elle’s choice is out right off the bat. Now, even I will concede that, on paper, Picard looks a lot better than Kirk, which means”
“They expect us to make a defence based entirely on the personalities of the characters.”
“Which means we only have one choice.”
“Threaten to withhold sex and force them to settle?”
“Exactly. Would you like to deliver the ultimatum or shall I?”
Meanwhile
“Alright Jones, let’s talk strategy.”
“Ok, well, personality wise, Kirk has Picard beat so we’re going to have to argue stats.”
“But that’s exactly what Neal and Mike will expect and prepare for.”
“Well that leaves us with one option. We’ll threaten to withhold sex and force them into settlement.”
“Great, I’ll begin negotiations.”
“Gentlemen,” Peter called from his place, “I have made a decision.”
Mikes jaw dropped “What?”
“We haven't even presented our arguments yet!” Harvey protested.
“I know,” Peter said calmly, “but I heard both your defence strategies, and if this goes wrong none of us are getting any tonight. So, here is my decision. We will discount Elle’s choice and watch both movies, Wrath of Khan, followed by First Contact. If you can't agree to that then we will watch Journey Home and you won't be allowed to complain.”
Harvey, Mike, Neal and Clinton nodded and Peter banged the gavel (meat mallet) before they all dispersed to change clothes and gather snacks.
Later, back in the livingroom
“Alright children, move it.” Mike plopped down between his son and his goddaughter. Abby just huffed and Garrison stuck his tongue out at the man.
“What are we watching Pops?” Garrison asked Harvey once he was squished down between Garrison and Mike.
“Wrath of Khan followed by First Contact. Since Abby is a Star Trek virgin she’ll be settling the long standing issue of Kirk vs. Picard at the end of the second movie.”
“Ah, speaking of,” Neal asked from his position next to the wine fridge, “what is our current standing on that issue?”
“I think, at last count, it was Elle, Neal and Mike for Kirk and Harvey, me, and Garrison for Picard with Peter as Switzerland.” Clinton spoke from his spot on the floor, looking up at his fiancee .
After the movies
“So? Who do you like better?” Garrison peered over his fathers to watch Abbi, who seemed to be deep in thought.
“Umm, gosh you’re gonna hate me for this but... While both captains are superior in their own rights I will maintain my right to remain neutral under the Switzerland Act of movie night April, 2012. Sorry guys.”
Groans sounded from around the room and Peter shook his head, saying “Ever the diplomat, I’ll never understand why you refuse to study international politics.”
“I didn't refuse, uncle Peter, I said ‘not right now’. I won’t be eligible as a foreign emissary until I’m like 22 anyways.”
“Alright.” Harvey broke in when it seemed as if Peter was about to argue, “I’m tired. Gentelmen, and lady, to your guestrooms. Abbi, you’re either out here on the couch or on the pullout in Gar’s room. It’s up to your dads.”
Abbigail turned a pleading look on her father. Neal gave his daughter a stern look that clearly said keep it PG, and motioned for her to go. Abbi squealed and ran after Gar, linking pinkies with him as they walked to his room.