Chapter Text
Nathaniel had a brother. Although his mother had warned him many times to never call Kevin his brother in front of Nathan. Kevin was not his son after all, he was only Mary’s child. Nathaniel never learnt who his father was.
Kevin did not live with them. He had only been one when Mary had married Nathan, but Nathan had not wanted to raise someone else’s child, so Kevin had been given to Tetsuji. Nathaniel did not want to admit it but he was jealous of his brother. He got to play Exy alongside Riko, the future best player in the world, and he got to be away from Nathan and his anger.
They did get to see each other on court, though. Nathaniel was still too little to play with the others but when Nathan wanted them out of the house his mother would take him to the court to watch Kevin play. Nathaniel realized later that she must have missed her son terribly.
He was just content to be able to see his brother. They even got to talk occasionally, during the short break Tetsuji allowed his players or when Nathaniel would volunteer to help clean the court after practise. Kevin would call him “Nate” because it was shorter and Nathaniel would call him “Kevi” just to give him a nickname too.
He got to see Riko as well. Although the boy would usually wince at his sight and avoid Nathaniel at all cost. It was hard not to admire him, his play was practically flawless, but he made it difficult to like him as a person.
‘I think Riko doesn’t like me’ Nathaniel whispered to Kevin after his practise.
He nodded, staring at the ground. ‘Tetsuji wants us to be like brothers to each other. Riko wants that too. But I already have a brother and I don’t want another. He knows it, that’s why he doesn’t like you.’
Nathaniel titled his head. ‘But I will join you when I grow. Then he won’t be able to deny that you like me more than him.’
Kevin smiled slightly. He seemed to be scared of making Riko angry. Nathaniel was not sure why.
His mother called him from the tribunes. He hugged Kevin quickly before joining her. He noticed how his brother looked around anxiously as he returned the hug.
Nathaniel was six when he was finally let on the court. He had already managed to fall in love with Exy, so now he vibrated with excitement at the possibility of playing not only at a real court with other players, but also alongside his brother.
His mother made it clear that practising with Tetsuji did not mean he would be immediately joining the team. He would have an official test once he was older, in a year or two, and then it would be decided if he was going to become an actual member of the team. For some reason Mary seemed anxious about the idea.
Nathaniel did not think much about it. He was just happy to be able to attend practise, and so was Kevin.
Riko clearly was not. He kept pulling Kevin away from Nathaniel, getting angry whenever they tried to talk to each other. He often talk to Kevin in Japanese, refusing to teach Nathaniel as much as a single word.
Once he and Riko got into a fight over it. Nathaniel was younger but he was just as strong as Riko, and who knows how it would have ended had Tetsuji not put an end to it.
Although Kevin kept quiet about it, he clearly hated when these two argued so openly. It was much later when Nathaniel realized that he did not hate it because he wanted them to get along: he was simply scared for his brother’s safety if he made the Moriyamas angry.
It all ended before it could properly start.
When Nathaniel was eight the day of his test finally came. Despite his dislike of the captain, he wanted nothing else but to officially join the team. The only thing he did not understand was why his mother seemed so worried, why she was so much paler than usual as she watched him play and why she was so quiet whenever he spoke of the team.
Then Kevin and Riko saw something they were not supposed to see. Nathaniel was silent and tried to keep his breath steady as they stared at the cut off limbs, left lifeless in a pool of dark blood, and the still breathing, still screaming man with Nathaniel’s father in the middle, unmoved by the massacre except for a small smirk playing on his face.
It was not the first time Nathaniel had seen kill. His mother had told him to stay quiet and wait until it was over, so that was what he was now trying to do.
The moment he sent a glance towards Kevin and Riko it occurred to him that maybe it was not a regular thing to see. Maybe it was not something everyone’s father did and maybe he should not be trying to get used to it so desperately.
Kevin screamed and Riko looked as if he was going to throw up.
Nathan only looked at them once, with nothing but contempt in his eyes. Kevin stared at him, unable to pull his eyes away. Finally Nathaniel squeezed his hand, urging him to leave. His father would not have liked it if they looked at him for too long.
Kevin finally turned and ran, still holding his brother’s hand. Riko followed behind them, still horrified with what he had seen. He might have been an annoying and jealous brat but he was still a ten years old child and witnessing a gory murder was too much for him.
Finally they stopped, breathing heavily and leaning against a wall. Riko sat on the ground, staring at the floor silently. Kevin’s knees broke under him and he sobbed as he fell to the ground.
‘What.. What was that, Nathaniel?’ Riko whispered, turning to look at him. He was practically begging with his eyes to tell him that he had understood something wrong, that what they had seen was not real after all. To give him any kind of reassurance. He looked so desperate Nathaniel had to remind himself that he did not like him.
He only shrugged. He did not know what answer to give them. ‘He needed to get rid of someone.’ he finally said quietly.
‘He.. He just killed someone!’ Kevin cried. ‘It has- we need- we have to report it, or- or tell someone-’ he stuttered, wiping his tears away.
‘No.’ Nathaniel said abruptly. ‘Mum said we can’t. It’s just gonna make things worse.’
‘This isn’t normal’ Riko said, his voice still shaking. ‘You can’t just ignore that your father kills people.’
Nathaniel looked down. There were not really any other options.
‘Does he hurt you too?’ Kevin whispered.
‘Sometimes.’ he simply replied.
‘But you-’
‘Nathaniel.’ his mother’s voice interrupted. She stood at the other side of the hall, her jaw clenched, her fist shaking by her side. ‘Follow me.’ she said.
Nathaniel looked at his brother again. He did not want to leave him, but he could not disobey his mother’s orders. Eventually he kneeled in front of Kevin, who still sat on the floor, and hugged him quickly before leaving.
‘I’ll be right back, Kevi’ he said and went to follow his mother. Kevin did not even have the strength to reply.
Nathaniel did not know then that he was not going to be right back. In fact, he was not going to see his brother for another ten years.
He begged his mother to let him talk to Kevin before they run. To at least let him say goodbye. Make the last promises too see each other again. She did not let him. He cried and he screamed but she only slapped him to make him stop. And so they left without as much as a single “goodbye”.
He knew Nathan was going to be furious once he found out. And he knew he would have to take it out on someone. He could only pray that Tetsuji had the power to keep his brother safe.
The first time Nathaniel saw Kevin in TV he almost started crying. His brother was smiling to the audience and talking to the reporter in a convincing voice, standing right next to Riko, the black tattoos visible on their faces. Kevin seemed happy, but Nathaniel could not help but feel that he should have been standing by their side right now.
His mother made it clear that he was never allowed to play Exy again, but that did not stop him from researching every single fact about the sport and its two star players he could find. The only reason Mary let him do that was that a binder with pictures and articles of Exy players was a perfect place to hide money and contact information.
He found out about Kevin’s injury the moment the news had been made public. He felt his heart stopping when the reporter predicted that he would return to the court again. Exy was Kevin’s life. Taking him away from it would be equal to a death sentence.
Then Kevin joined the team from Palmetto. He was supposed to be the coach’s assistant. Nathaniel was probably even more confused than all the fans who followed Kevin’s life. Maybe his brother simply wanted to stay as close to Exy as possible. Maybe he wanted to challenge himself by trying to fix the most broken team in the country.
Until he started playing again. When Kevin returned to the court with the racquet in his right hand, Nathaniel was beyond proud. Of course his brother was not going stop, even if the Ravens had given up on him. Even if it was the worst team in the world, maybe the only one that would accept him after the injury, at least he was playing once again.
Nathaniel never thought he would ever return to Exy, let alone see his brother again. He could keep it all close in his precious binder, but that was as close as he would ever get to them.
Until Mary had died. After they had run away from Nathan and left Kevin behind, she was the only family he had had left. Now she was not.
She would have beat him up had she found out he signed up for an Exy team in his new high school. But the truth was, he missed playing so much. It was the last thing that linked him to the days he and Kevin had spent together on the court and Nathaniel, now Neil, did not want to lose those memories. He tried to convince himself that no harm would come from these few months in the school Exy team.
Until that memorable day in which Andrew Minyard hit him in the stomach with a racquet. In which he saw Kevin again.
His brother looked at him from the other side of the room. Neil felt himself going pale and froze, reminding himself to breathe.
Kevin stared at him, as though judging his abilities by his appearance. He did not recognize him. Of course he didn’t. It had been ten years after all, Neil’s hair was dyed dark brown and he had contacts in his eyes.
And Kevin still looked exactly the same. His dark hair and green eyes had not changed, the number on his cheek was still the same, although it had been made permanent.
‘What are you doing here?’ Neil choked out before he could stop himself.
Kevin looked at him, unimpressed. ‘Why were you leaving?’ he asked.
‘I asked you first.’ he shot back.
‘Coach already answered that question. We are waiting for you to sign the contract. Stop wasting our time.’ Kevin replied. Even though his brother looked the same, he was much more arrogant than when they were little kids. It honestly annoyed him. He would not act like that towards him if he knew who he was.
Well, at least Neil was now sure that Kevin did not recognize him. He should be safe, for now. He still felt his heart beating wildly. He wanted to cry and scream as he stared at his brother, but he had to stay silent. He could never let him know.
He honestly did not know what finally pushed him to sign the contract. It was the worst possible decision someone in his situation could make. He knew he was going to be in the public eye. Even if Kevin did not recognize him, Riko or Tetsuji still could. Even if he ran after a few months, he was still taking a huge risk by joining the Foxes.
But it was not just about playing Exy. Kevin was there. For these few months he could keep his brother close. He could get to know the person he became. This was the only chance he would ever get of being around Kevin again, however dangerous.
Kevin watched him as he signed the contract. His eyes were colder now, or maybe they always were, just not towards Nathaniel. But now he was Neil and he could not let anyone find out that a boy named Nathaniel had ever existed.
Only when his brother hid the contract, turned away and left without as much as a single “goodbye”, did Neil let himself fall to the ground.
He took a breath, trying to steady his heartbeat.