Chapter Text
Taehyung grimaces and closes his eyes with every blow that lands. His skin crawls when he hears the bone break. The smell of copper fills the room, and it makes him cringe. He opens one eye and chances a glance at the ring just in time to see him take a hard right hook to the chin knocking him back and onto the ground. Taehyung instantly steps forward, only to have a wrist grab onto him tightly and pull him back.
“Don’t,” his best friend warns, “you know how he gets when he’s lost a fight.”
“But Yoongi he’s hurt and—”
“And the last person he’s going to want to patch him up or touch him is you. What are you a masochist or something Tae? Do you like being yelled at? Give it a rest. Believe me I’m not in the mood to fight that asshole tonight either, so just steer clear of him. The only reason I even came tonight was to keep you company.”
Taehyung yanks his wrist away, “I don’t need a babysitter, Yoongi. I’m fine. I’m working.”
“Working…you could be working somewhere better. During the day. In a respectable practice. Not here, in disgusting boxing rings following around the biggest asshole to have ever been born,” Yoongi says clenching his jaw. He watches as the Alpha is hoisted and carried out of the ring into the back area. “I swear to God Taehyung, if that asshole starts in on you tonight—”
“Then I’ll handle it. Like I always do,” huffs Taehyung as he makes his way to the back area, Yoongi fast on his heels. Taehyung is grateful for his best friend wanting to be here, but not like this. Not when it feels like he’s only here to babysit him because his uncle told him to.
“I know you can handle it. It’s myself I can’t handle. The way he fucking talks to you. He has no respect for anyone.”
Taehyung enters the large room to see the corner man and trainer Kim Namjoon standing over the Alpha who is spitting blood onto the floor. Barely conscious. “Is he ok?” Taehyung asks looking at Namjoon. The last thing he wants is for that Alpha to see or hear worry in his voice, but he’s worse for wear and Taehyung is legitimately worried about him. He’s also pretty sure they broke his nose tonight with the large crack he heard and the blood streaming down his nostrils.
“Do I look ok Princess?” Jungkook responds, turning to spit blood at Taehyung’s shoes. Taehyung grimaces and backs up. “What the fuck are you even doing here? We have a real doctor to check me out. Get the fuck out of here,” he mumbles as he makes a shaky attempt to walk.
“Sit down Jungkook. Taehyung is here because he’s part of the team, you know that. And because I feel better if he looks you over as well. Make sure nothing else other than that nose of yours is broken.”
“Fuck that! I don’t want that useless omega anywhere near me. Get him the fuck out!” Jungkook growls as he locks eyes with Taehyung who whimpers from the aggression. Yoongi protectively stands in front of Taehyung, hands turned into fists.
Jungkook snorts, “Is that supposed to intimidate me. Take you and your annoying omega out of my fucking sight Yoongi, before I break your face,” Jungkook angrily spews, eyes turning red.
Yoongi steps forward, teeth gritted, letting out a loud growl. Taehyung wraps his arm around him, pulling him back. “Yoongs, he’s really not worth it. What is there left on his face to break anyway. That other alpha beat the shit out of him. I think the point is for you to win at least one fight Jungkook. But I guess that might be hard to understand what with all the blows your already pea sized brain has received. Is there even anything left in there? How are you even forming coherent sentences—”
Jungkook sneers at both Yoongi and Taehyung, “Fuck you, Kim! And the high horse you rode on. I don’t need you here. GET THE FUCK OUT!”
Taehyung snorts and smiles. “Sure thing, your lord highness. Come on Yoongs. Joon,” Taehyung motions to Namjoon who follows him to the exit. “Have the doctor take a look at his nose. It’s broken. His shoulder and mobility in his left hook were lacking tonight. I can’t help him fix that if he won’t take our sessions seriously. It’s been six months since his surgery. It should be improving, but—”
“He’s so busy hating you and spewing the biggest amount of shit at you that he’s sabotaging his own progress,” Yoongi interrupts looking over his shoulder at Jungkook who has his head tilted back trying to stop the blood streaming down his nose.
Taehyung sighs. Jeon Jungkook. The bane of his existence. The thorn in his side for the last 6 months.
Ever since the alpha hurt his shoulder and needed surgery. Ever since he was assigned physical therapy with Taehyung. Ever since Namjoon begged Taehyung to join their training team to help him fully heal. Six long months later and everything is still the same. That’s not exactly true. The hatred the omega has for the alpha increasing exponentially and vice versa.
In Taehyung’s defense, the hostility started with the alpha. Taehyung can’t even really explain why or what exactly happened. One-minute Jungkook had greeted him pretty normally, albeit a bit coldly, then the next minute he was calling him an asshole and refusing to participate in the session. To Taehyung it felt like a switch had turned on and he’s not even sure what he had done. He even tried to apologize even though he’s positive he had done nothing wrong, but Jungkook was stubborn as a mule, and mean. Incredibly mean. Taehyung had attempted to change him to another physical therapist, but no one could stomach his bad attitude.
He's not even sure why, but Namjoon came to speak to him personally and apologize for Jungkook’s awful behavior. And to Taehyung’s surprise he had offered him a job, an opportunity to work privately as part of Jungkook’s training team. Taehyung had of course immediately rejected the idea. Vehemently refused. But Namjoon had been persistent, and quite convincing when he offered him a ridiculous amount of money to take the position.
Taehyung thinking it was a joke or worse yet, a scam, called Yoongi to tell him about the offer. Yoongi had gasped and explained to Taehyung that it was no joke, or a scam. Kim Namjoon came from one of the richest families in Seoul.
His grandfather moved and immigrated here years ago. Namjoon being the only child until they adopted a small boy, Jungkook. “That Jeon kid, he grew up in foster care. The Kim family adopted him. They’re loaded. So if Namjoon is really offering you that amount of money to privately help Jeon, it’s because it’s legit. He’s supposed to be some great boxing prospect or something. I heard he’s a real asshole.”
Taehyung knew beggars can’t be choosers, and considering the state he was in 3 years prior and the debt his uncle and him had acquired due to that, he jumped on the offer not knowing things with Jeon Jungkook would only deteriorate even further.
“I’ll talk to him again Taehyung. I will. I’ll try,” Namjoon says.
“What’s the use Joon. You’ve tried, Hobi has tried, Jimin. He hates me. Why I’m not sure. I really wish he would just tell me what I did for him to hate me so much,” Taehyung shrugs, “but at this point it’s a moot point. Look, you’ve been really nice to me and believe me the money is great and I would be lying if I said I didn’t need it, but I think it’s time maybe we started talking about finding him someone else. Someone he can at least tolerate. He’s exceptional at what he does Joon…when he’s healthy and at full capacity. But we all know he won’t get there with me.”
Namjoon shakes his head and reaches out holding Taehyung in place, “Please, just—just give me some time to talk to him again. I’m sure—”
“Sure nothing. Taehyung has put up with enough. Considering everything, he needs to stay stress free, focused on his own self-care—”
Namjoon frowns, “Considering what?”
Taehyung bites the inside of his cheek and waves Yoongi off. “Nothing Joon. Considering nothing. I—I just think it’s time we moved on and went our separate ways. That way Jeon Jungkook and I can stop making each other miserable.”
“JOON! Stop fucking around with those two fucking morons and get me home already!” Jungkook spits out glaring at Yoongi then at Taehyung. Namjoon lets out a frustrated sigh and turns to look at Taehyung, pleadingly.
“Your royal highness beckons thee Joon. Get him checked out tonight, ok?” Taehyung says as he exits with Yoongi.
Namjoon turns and angrily makes his way towards Jungkook. “Finally—”
“He’s quitting. He’s going to fucking quit! All because of you! What the fuck Jungkook?! I don’t get you! Don’t you see you need him—”
Jungkook’s eyes turn red again, “I don’t need him! I don’t need anyone! He wants to leave, let him fucking leave! I don’t fucking care!”
Namjoon shakes his head, “We both know that’s not true. No matter how much you want to deny it, we both know that is not fucking true! You saw what happened the last time. You want that to happen again?! Get your head out of your ass Jungkook! He’s going to quit!”
“Good! Good fucking riddance! Get him as far away from me as possible! Fuck him and that asshole alpha he’s always with,” Jungkook screams as he walks towards the exit.
“Jungkook! Where the fuck do you think you’re going?! The doctor has to check you out!”
“Fuck you and fuck Kim Taehyung!” Jungkook angrily yells as he steps out into the crisp Boston air slamming the door behind him.
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Taehyung puts the key in the front door as he continues to listen to Yoongi curse to the high heavens about Jungkook. He loves his best friend. Adores him. But he really can’t handle this amount of stress and this Yoongi. Especially when he becomes this worked up over Jungkook. Which is basically every single time he’s ever around that infuriating alpha.
“Yoongs, please, give it a rest already. I’m tired and I really don’t want to end my night by continuing to talk about Jungkook. Or think about him. Or know he even exists in this fucking universe.”
“Then fucking quit already! Fucking quit and you don’t ever have to see or hear from that piece of shit again,” Yoongi angrily grits out.
Taehyung sighs. He stands in front of his door and places his forehead against it. He gets it. He understands the unwavering protectiveness Yoongi feels towards him. How could he not? They’ve known each other since they were 4. They’ve practically been in the same class since preschool. Attached at the hip through high school, even going to the same college. Everyone constantly thinks they’re more of a couple than best friends. Taehyung grimaces at the thought. Yoongi is the brother he never had and with that comes the over protectiveness. Maybe it’s Yoongi’s nature, being an alpha, thinking he has to constantly be in vigilance mode when it comes to Taehyung with him being an omega. Or maybe it has everything to do with everything that’s happened. Maybe he can’t help being this protective.
“Yoongi, stop. I told you I don’t want to talk about him anymore,” Taehyung tiredly says as he pushes his front door open.
“Don’t want to talk about who?”
“Who do you think? That bitch Jungkook. I hope his nose never heals and falls off,” Yoongi replies with a huge smile on his face as he side steps Taehyung, entering the apartment first. Taehyung can’t help laughing at Yoongi’s comment, following close behind.
“Yoongi, come on man. I know you weren’t raised in a barn and at this point I know you do this shit on purpose. Take your fucking shoes off before you step foot in our apartment. Keep it clean and sterile.”
Taehyung frowns, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. “Jin, you don’t need to—seriously? That’s not even a thing anymore. Jesus, the both of you tonight are seriously setting me off. Can’t we try to act normal even a little bit? Why does everyone constantly have to remind me of shit I don’t want to think about.”
Jin looks at Yoongi and raises an eyebrow. “Wow tonight with Jungkook must’ve been bad if he’s in this bad of a mood.”
Yoongi rolls his eyes. “Isn’t it always bad with that asshole?”
“I’m in a mood because Yoongi can’t seem to give it a rest about Jungkook and keeps hassling me about quitting. And you—” he points a finger in Jin’s face, “stop saying stupid shit like clean and sterile! God, I hate it here! I swear! I’m moving to fucking Australia to get away from all of you!”
“Tae, do I need to remind you there are spiders the size of your head there. You wouldn’t last a day. Besides you love us too much to ever leave our sides,” Jin responds grabbing Taehyung’s face and placing a slobbery kiss on his cheek.
Taehyung rolls his eyes. “Why are you even awake Jin? Please don’t tell me you waited up for me.”
“And what if I did? You’re my nephew and I worry. Did you eat today, Taehyung?”
“He did. Because I forced him to,” Yoongi says as he sits on the couch.
“What’s the difference anyway. Everything tastes like fucking cardboard,” Taehyung replies sticking his tongue out in disgust.
“Still? It hasn’t improved? What about your sense of—”
“The same Jin. All the fucking same. The same it’s been for nearly a year now. Amazingly enough the only thing I can stomach is the one thing that goes straight to my fucking hips. Vanilla fucking ice cream and my hips most definitely don’t need anything else.”
Jin looks at Yoongi giving him a worried look. “Did you take your vitamins today? Maybe we should talk about a med change? Call the doc—”
“It’s fine. We don’t need to do anything. I’m fine. I’ve dealt with it for this long, at this point it doesn’t even matter to me anymore. It’s better than the alternative. I guess,” Taehyung mumbles.
“Tae—”
“I’m going to bed. I’m tired and annoyed and I really don’t want to take it out on you or you,” he says looking at Yoongi, “I’ll see you both in the morning. Love you.” Taehyung turns on his heels disappearing down the hallway into his room.
Jin turns to Yoongi and stares.
“He’s fine. I’m keeping an eye on him. Making sure he’s taking care of himself. I am Jin…but this job. It’s—I really don’t think it’s good for him. He needs to quit this thing. He needs to get the fuck away from Jungkook. That guy Jin—you don’t know what he’s really like with Taehyung. The shit he says to him. How he treats him. And Tae can fight a good fight, give it back to him just as good…but it takes a toll on him. I can see it. It exhausts him. I don’t know, it worries me about what this is doing to him.”
Jin runs a hand through his hair. Why does his nephew have to be so damn stubborn? He understands why Taehyung feels like he needs to stick with this job, but the debt is something they can figure out without Taehyung being tortured on a daily basis by someone who can’t seem to value Taehyung’s work. Jin wonders if Taehyung isn’t keeping this job for other reasons. Reasons Jin really doesn’t want to think about right now.
“Maybe we let up on the quitting stuff a bit. Back off from that. You know how he gets when he feels cornered. What I’m more worried about is the side effects. I’m going to make him an appoint—”
Yoongi shakes his head, “Don’t. You just said it yourself. He’ll feel cornered. It’s his trigger Jin. Let me try to talk to him. I’ll even call and make him the appointment myself, but after we talk. He’s fine Jin. I think both you and I need to take a step back now too. Give him some room to breathe with all that. I think it’s an adjustment for us too.”
Jin sighs and walks to the mantle that houses several family portraits. He picks up a frame and runs a finger along the picture. “I guess you’re right Yoongi,” Jin looks at the picture gripping it tightly, “I’m trying Sis. I really am just trying to keep him safe like you made me promise I would.”
“And you are. But this is out of our control. It always was. And like he said. He’s fine now. We have to learn to move on and live our lives,” Yoongi says putting a hand on Jin’s shoulder.
“I’m older than you, how are you more emotionally mature than me?” Jin asks, raising his eyebrows at Yoongi.
Yoongi shrugs, “Because I am just that awesome.”
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Taehyung sits on his bed and stares at the bookcase that takes up the whole side of his room.
He gets up walking to his dresser and lights a scented candle that sits upon it. He bends down and takes a quick sniff and frowns. He turns it to the side, “Pineapple my ass,” he huffs and blows it out immediately. He’s feeling antsy. A little out of body. But then again, it’s his normal ‘I just spent time with Jungkook and now I feel like shit’ reaction. He just wishes he knew what he did. He swears he would go back in time and fix it. Jump into a DeLorean or the Tardis and go back to that exact moment when Jungkook decided that Taehyung was the worst omega imaginable and fix whatever went wrong.
Then again, he wonders if it would even matter much. Jungkook just seems like a miserable person to begin with. He’s not even very pleasant with the people he can seem to stomach, Namjoon, Hobi, Jimin. Even with them he’s a colossal piece of shit. And yet…there’s something Taehyung can’t seem to put his finger on. Something that draws him to Jungkook.
“Maybe I am a fucking masochist?”
Taehyung stares back at the bookcase, moving swiftly, straight to the middle shelf. He carefully and cautiously pulls the book out. It’s tattered and frayed. The cover torn at the corners, color faded, the coffee ring from his mother’s favorite mug adorning the top like a badge of honor. He turns and bends down turning a switch on. Twinkly lights turn on all around his room luminating it and giving it a soft warm glow. He goes to sit in his reading corner, settling into his chair.
Before opening the book, he hesitates and holds it closely to his nose, smelling it. He bites his lip, frustrated. He wonders if it still smells like her.
He opens it to the middle, no particular page or chapter. He’s read this countless times before both with his mother and on his own. He can recite it without even having the book in his hands, so it doesn’t really matter where he picks up in the story. For Taehyung it’s more about what this book represents for him. How it makes him feel to hold it between his fingers knowing that she used to hold it the same way. It’s more about comfort. It’s his comfort story and he needs it more than ever tonight.
He turns when he hears a small knock on his door. He exhales, lamenting that time alone without feeling suffocated is so foreign to him and has been for a while now. But he understands why. He doesn’t hold it against Yoongi, and he especially doesn’t blame his Uncle Jin for behaving the way he does with him. He just wishes the circumstances were different. Things happen that add a wrinkle in time. That change things in ways that can’t be undone. In ways that even time travel can’t fix. He closes his book and stares at the candle. He really should just throw it away. It makes him irrationally angry having it in here.
“Come in,” Taehyung says, swinging slightly in his chair.
“Hey,” Yoongi apprehensively sticks his head in. “Shit, you’re in your chair and holding THE book. Fucking Jungkook,” Yoongi says clenching his jaw as he enters Taehyung’s room and throws himself on his bed.
“It has nothing to do with Jungkook. I’m just sort of feeling nostalgic, that’s all,” Taehyung gets up and returns the book carefully to its place on the bookcase.
“Bullshit. Taehyung, you need to really explain to me why you put up with so much of that fucking alpha’s shit. Because I know you better than anyone, even Jin, and I know if it was anyone else you would’ve told him to fuck off, walked out of his life, and never looked back. What the fuck is this Tae? Seriously.”
“What do you mean? You act like I let him walk all over me,” Taehyung responds tersely. He really doesn’t like the implication that he’s some weak omega, a door mat.
“No, I didn’t say that. I know you stand up for yourself, but…you told Joon tonight you were ready to step away. I don’t think that’s true. I don’t think you have any intention of quitting which to be honest Tae, it’s really fucking concerning. Because you should want to quit. You should want to get as far away from him as possible. He’s a fucking shit alpha. Has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. So why? Why are you still trying to help him? You don’t owe him shit Tae.”
Taehyung stops and thinks about what Yoongi just said. Really thinks about it because everything Yoongi just said is 100% true. He should just quit. He doesn’t owe Jungkook a thing, yet he finds himself not wanting to leave it behind. Leave him behind.
“Can I be honest with you?” Taehyung asks as he stares back at his bookcase, eyes focusing in on the middle shelf.
“Always. You know that.”
“What if it happens again? What if I need an out quickly again or…I—I just,” Taehyung gulps. “I need a job that won’t miss me, Yoongi. I need a job where if I needed to, I could drop it without worrying that they’ll miss me or that my absence will have some great impact.” Taehyung rubs his hands together. “This is that job Yoongi,” he softly whispers. “Jungkook could care less about me, in fact he hates me. It’s better that way. It won’t impact him. I won’t be missed.”
Yoongi’s mouth goes dry. He takes a deep breath and opens his mouth but can’t seem to find the words. He looks at his best friend who looks so tiny against the massive bookcase. It almost looks like the books are swallowing him whole.
“You—fuck. What the fuck Taehyung? I don’t want you talking like that anymore. You don’t need a job like that. Understood. It’s fine now. YOU are fine now. That’s fucking ridiculous,” Yoongi scoffs, “the fact that you’re thinking like that. No. No fucking way. In fact, look. I know you don’t want to hear this, but I have never minced words with you even at our worst and I’m not about to start now. I think you need to quit. Now. And go back to medical school. Fuck this whole physical therapy bullshit.”
Taehyung’s shoulders slump. He lies down next to Yoongi shaking his head. “You know I can’t do that. I won’t do that.”
“Why not Tae? You could do it. I believe you could. You don’t need an “out” kind of job. And I don’t care what you say. They would miss you. Joon, Hobi, Jimin. They would all miss you.”
“Not Jungkook,” Taehyung says bitterly.
“And so what? Why does it matter to you if he didn’t?”
Taehyung feels something tug at his chest. He unconsciously reaches up and puts his palm on his heart. “It shouldn’t, right? But fuck, I don’t know. It does. It bothers me. A lot actually. And it’s not the people pleaser in me. That’s not it. I can’t even describe it. He treats me like shit. I fucking hate him and yet…there’s something that pulls me to him. Like a fucking tether. And it drives me crazy. HE drives me crazy. He’s mean and horrible to me. So why do I want nothing more than to be around him sometimes?”
Yoongi’s mouth drops. “Please tell me you’re joking. Are you fucking telling me you—do you have feelings for Jungkook?! Are you fucking falling for him?! I swear I’m going to hurt you Taehyung,” Yoongi reaches out and shoves Taehyung.
Taehyung looks back at Yoongi utterly offended. “I AM NOT FALLING FOR JUNGKOOK! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!” Taehyung shoves Yoongi back. “I didn’t say I was falling for him, I said there was something pulling me to him, but I did not say love. Fuck, I didn’t even say like. I distinctly remember saying I hate the fucker. You know what, forget I said anything. You’re annoying!” Taehyung kicks Yoongi, trying to push him off his bed. “Get out of my room Yoongi! Go sleep in your own room tonight! I don’t want you staying here! The fucking audacity to suggest I’m falling for Jungkook. GET THE FUCK OUT!” Taehyung sits up and angrily pushes Yoongi off the bed.
“Alright, alright chill! I’m sorry! I take it back. You aren’t falling for Jungkook. You’re right. It’s fucking stupid of me to even suggest it. No one is falling for that guy. He’s going to end up alone for the rest of his life with the fucking attitude on him.” Yoongi holds his hands up, putting his knee back on Taehyung’s bed. Taehyung rolls his eyes reaching for the alpha’s wrist pulling him back on the bed again.
“I don’t want to talk about Jungkook anymore Yoongi. You can sleep in my room, but no more Jungkook talk.”
Yoongi purses his lips shut and nods his head. He lies down on one of Taehyung’s pillows facing him. “Tae…it’s coming up on the anniversary. Jin was talking about going and leaving flowers for them. It’s been a while since—you know because you were…” Yoongi trails off reaching over to hold Taehyung’s hand.
Taehyung closes his eyes and recites in his head, 📖‘He knew as well as we in our own world do that the road to hell is paved with good intentions—but he also knew that, for human beings, good intentions are sometimes all there are.’
Yoongi blinks and squeezes Taehyung’s hand. He knows what his best friend is doing. It’s the same thing he’s been doing since the day his mother died. Taehyung has a habit of calming himself by reciting passages of his favorite book…of his mother’s favorite book. He watches as Taehyung slowly opens his eyes and turns on his back, staring up at the ceiling.
“You know I honestly thought it was the last time I had ever seen them. That last time. That I wasn’t going to get another opportunity.”
“Tae—” Yoongi’s eyes water, they blur as they stare at Taehyung’s side profile.
“Yes…I’ll go to the cemetery again. I miss them.”
Fourteen years. It’s been fourteen years since his mother passed away from cancer. His father followed her not long after. Taehyung was 12 when it happened. Time has faded, but the memories and the pain haven’t. Still fresh in Taehyung’s mind and heart.
“It’s been a while since I’ve read to her Yoongi. I’m sure she misses it. I don’t think she went a day in her life without reading. Imagine how sad she must be. That I haven’t been back to read to her like I used to. Do you think she’s upset with me? Do you think she would understand why I haven’t?” Taehyung turns to look at Yoongi, tears in his eyes.
Yoongi takes a deep breath, “Yes, she understands. Better than most people. She’s your mom Tae. She knows why,” Yoongi reaches over pulling Taehyung into a hug, holding him close.
“I resented him so much for leaving me alone the way he did Yoongs,” Taehyung says close to Yoongi’s chest. “But I think with everything that’s happened it’s put a lot of things into perspective for me. I don’t hate him so much for that anymore. He’s my dad and living with any type of resentment towards him is really not healthy. And I am all about being healthy,” Taehyung sighs. “But I still think soulmates suck,” he says in a huff.
Yoongi smiles and gives Taehyung a squeeze. “We’ll see if you still believe that after you meet yours, your mate. What if he’s Chris Evans?”
“Oh, well, if he’s got America’s ass then I’m all about the soulmate bond,” jokes Taehyung.
Yoongi chuckles as he closes his eyes while holding Taehyung closely. Taehyung closes his eyes as well. Soulmates. Mates. The idea that they live in a world where that concept isn’t just stories in fairy tales. That everyone has a soulmate, a mate only for them, seems like the most ridiculous idea. Yet it’s the reality. To think that right now, Taehyung has a soulmate out there that he’s fated to, that he’s meant for, it seems in a way suffocating. The concept ruined his life, ultimately taking his father’s.
📖'I’ve seen what happens when people act on intuition, or for illogical reasons. Sometimes the results are ludicrous and embarrassing; more often they are simply horrible.’
Taehyung slowly drifts off to sleep.