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Chapter 5: Sapnap: guess whos got another guy simping for him

Summary:

Cast list comes out, new groupchats are made, and now there's a new guy simping for Dream?

Notes:

everyone pls welcome farfadox to the fic bc farfadream has been a recent obsession of mine. i know squidcraft was a few months ago but in my defense i started writing this around that time. also farfadream.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

COOL KIDS

 

Saturday, 9:34 AM

 

Big Man Tommy: CAST LIST IS OUT

 

Big Man Tommy has attached (1) file [cast_list.pdf]



Dream: OH MGY DOFJF

 

Dream: I GOT BELLE????



Ranboo: CONGRATS DREEAAAMM

 

Ranboo: I GOT LEFOU!!



Dream: YEAH BOO LETS GO

 

Dream: omg tommy got lumiere? pop off??



Big Man Tommy: thats right

 

Big Man Tommy: and jack got cogsworth LMAO

 

Puffy: i got mrs potts??



Dream: YEAH PUFFY <333



Puffy: <333



Niki: omg good job puffy!



Hannah: nice puffy!

 

Hannah: oh i got into the ensemble! thats nice



Dream: yeahh

 

Dream: @WilburSoot WIL YOU GOT GASTON



WilburSoot: holy sht holy sht

 

WilburSoot: GOOD NEWS THAT HE MANS MEEEEEEEEEEEE



Technoblade: no.



Dream: tech!! i got belle!



Technoblade: i saw.

 

Technoblade: good job. <3.



Dream: <3333



Puffy: wait is anyone else seeing this??

 

Puffy: punz got the beast?



Dream: oakfmdlkajerjfsad,j,.djklasjflksaj OH MY GOD HE DID

 

Dream: THAT IS SO FUNNY

 

Dream: @Punz WE GOT BEAST AND BELLE PUNZIE



Punz: huh

 

Punz: oh

 

Punz: sick



Sapnap: ew does that mean we have to see them kiss



Dream: well youre going to be stuck in the pit like a loser /lh



Sapnap: i dont mind if that means i wont have to see you smooching with ur bf



Dream: punzie we get to dance



Punz: oh god

 

Punz: i cant dance



Dream: i get to wear a dress :0

 

Dream: i love belles dress sm, i cant wait to wear it



WilburSoot: oh wow tubbo got the bookseller



Tubbo: well thats ironic  



Dream: lmao?



WilburSoot: dream we should start getting our dynamic in place

 

WilburSoot: ill flirt and act like a chad and you have to be all disgusted



Punz: back off bro



Sapnap: oooh, someones jealous



Technoblade: wil, you have to eat five dozen eggs now.



WilburSoot: gonna go buy all the fcking eggs from whole foods



Technoblade: oh, and orchestra member list is out as well. @Fundy @Sapnap @Sam @Tina @Illumina @George you all made it.



Tina: YAYYYYY

 

Tina: OH IM FIRST FLUTE :D 



Dream: LETS GO TINAAAA



Illumina: oh sick

 

Illumina: now i get to suffer on english horn as well



Fundy: which keyboard part am i?



Technoblade: one.



Fundy: seriously??



Technoblade: yeah.



Fundy: im so fcking good



Big Man Tommy: pit people, cringe

 

Big Man Tommy: i get to be lumiere



Dream: tommy you need to talk with a french accent now



Big Man Tommy: … im quitting



Dream: LMAO

---

piss 

 

Saturday, 11:09 AM

 

Seapeepeekay: see i told u you would be fine



Dre: skjdlfak dont scare me like that

 

Dre: for a sec i didnt know what you were talking about



Seapeepeekay: LMAO

 

Seapeepeekay: congrats on belle <3



Dre: thank youuuu <3

 

Dre: youre the best



Seapeepeekay: omg i got called the best by dream

 

Seapeepeekay: this is the best day of my life



Dre: lmao

---

Technoblade has started a groupchat

 

Technoblade has added 12 people

 

Technoblade has renamed the chat to ‘Pit Orchestra (the ACTUAL cool kids)



Illumina: lol whats with the name



Technoblade: need to prove a point to tommy.

 

Technoblade: anyways, welcome to the pit orchestra chat. this will be mainly used for updates, but you all are free to talk here if you’d like. i’ll just ping everyone if there’s an announcement.

 

Technoblade: we need to do introductions. say your name, your pronouns, your instrument, and anything you want people to know.

 

Technoblade: i’m technoblade. call me that or techno, but do not call me “tech” unless i give you permission to. also, do not touch my stuff or me without asking first. my pronouns are he/him, and i am principal chair (first violin for violin 1), so i am second in command after mr. sparklez. 



Illumina: hey im illumina, he/him, and i play oboe. dont touch my reeds because theyre fragile and i will cry if i break another one



TinaKitten: im tina! she/her, flute one :)

 

TinaKitten: oh and i always have cork grease and valve oil with me bc a lot of my friends in band tend to forget theirs, so if you need any im happy to provide!



Fundy: fundy, he/him, keyboard one i guess. do not call me a furry



Technoblade: be glad wilbur isn’t in here.



Fundy: yeah thank god for that



Awesamdude has changed their name to Sam



Sam: hey yall, im sam. i go by he/him and im gonna be the double bassist :) i always have spare rosin for all the string instruments so if you need any just ask



Sapnap: sapnap, he/him, first violin for violin 2. dont call me sap unless youre close with me



Fruitberries: im fruit, he/him, cello



Sylveey: oh theres a chat for this

 

Sylveey: im sylvee, she/her, keyboard three i think



Jojosolos: jojo, she/her. im the clarinetist because aimsey couldnt make the audition



Sylveey: jojo!!!!



Jojosolos: sylvee!!!



Antfrost: ant, he/him, keyboard four! 



BadBoyHalo: call me bad! he/him, keyboard two :D



Skeppy: skeppy, french horn 1



Sapnap: i thought u were percussion?



Skeppy: too many insuremtns 

 

Skeppy: i cnat play all of them



Technoblade: “insuremtns”



Skeppy: SHUT UP



Technoblade: your ability to spell amazes me.



Skeppy: SHTU



Technoblade: anyways, some business stuff. we’re missing a lot of parts, so ask around. if you know people who play the parts we’re missing, give them my email. we need two more french horns, two trumpets, a low brass player (preferably someone who can do trombone and tuba), another flute, another cello, and at least one more violin. we’re also going to need a percussionist but we might have to hire for that. i don’t know if anyone here plays all of the necessary instruments.



Hannah: got it



TinaKitten: aye aye captain!



Technoblade: that’s all. rehearsal this thursday and every thursday after that until tech week. a full schedule should be sent out within the next few weeks.



Antfrost: see yall on thursday!

---

COOL KIDS

 

Monday, 11:21 AM

 

Sapnap: guess whos got another guy simping on him



Illumina: dream?



Sapnap: bingo bongo



Illumina: lmao

 

Illumina: who is it this time



Sapnap: this guy named farfadox

 

Sapnap: hes new and transferred into our spanish class bc he speaks fluent spanish

 

Sapnap: our teacher put him next to dream and he spent the entirety of class hitting on dream

 

Sapnap: dream calls him el diablo for some reason



Dream: bc hes el diablo

 

Dream: farfi is really nice tho



Sapnap: farfi???



Dream: yeah



Illumina: this is, like, the tenth guy



Hannah: tenth? wow dream



Dream: im just hot i guess



Sapnap: dude im telling you, farfadox was flirting hard

 

Sapnap: does he know youre taken?



Dream: no but im sure hell find out soon enough

 

Dream: although

 

Dream: hold on ill brb

---

You should have paid me more, he said. You know, like a LIAR

 

Monday, 11:23 AM

 

Menace (/aff): punzieee

 

Menace (/aff):  whats ur opinion on another guy hitting on me



(My) traitor <3: who is it lmao



Menace (/aff): hes named farfadox

 

Menace (/aff): he moved up to my spanish class

 

Menace (/aff): he was flirting with me the whole time and i didnt tell him im taken but if you want me to then i will

 

Menace (/aff): i can tell him to lay off



(My) traitor <3: can you just tell him that youre taken?

 

(My) traitor <3: i dont mind him flirting but i dont want him to think that youre up for grabs, yknow?



Menace (/aff): yeah i know <3



(My) traitor <3: <3

 

(My) traitor <3: so looks like i have more competition, huh? 



Menace (/aff): what can i say, im just popular like that



(My) traitor <3: damn

 

(My) traitor <3: i gotta up my game



Menace (/aff): youre gonna get to fight wil for my affections during the musical, remember? you get to push him off the tower

 

Menace (/aff): or does he fall off?



(My) traitor <3: i think he falls off

 

(My) traitor <3: but im sure mr scott wont mind if i pretend to stab him a few times



Menace (/aff): i think he stabs you



(My) traitor <3: never

 

(My) traitor <3: ill stab him first



Menace (/aff): lmao okay

---

COOL KIDS

 

Monday, 7:25 PM

 

Ranboo: GUYS

 

Ranboo: WILBUR HAS TO KISS DREAM



Sapnap: LMAO???



Ranboo: punz is glaring rn

 

Ranboo: dream your suitors are fighting over you



Dream: skjadlkjalfj

 

Dream: its okay punzie



WilburSoot: i dont know how to feel about this

 

WilburSoot: on the one hand i get to kiss dream

 

WilburSoot: on the other hand punz is scary and i dont want to die



Sapnap: oh i hope i get a good seat in the pit

 

Sapnap: i want to see this go down



Technoblade: well, you’re not going to find out for two more months.



Sapnap: damn :/

 

Sapnap: we have rehearsal this thursday right



Technoblade: yes.



Sapnap: alright



Seapeekay: wilbur has to kiss dream? LMAO

 

Seapeekay: punz how are you feeling



Punz: is it against school code of conduct to challenge someone to a fistfight



WilburSoot: yes??

 

WilburSoot: please do not challenge me to a fistfight

 

WilburSoot: techno if they do youre fighting for me



Technoblade: nah.



WilburSoot: FCK



Punz: dont worry dude im just kidding

 

Punz: its fine

 

Punz: its a part of the play so its whatever



WilburSoot: oh thank god



Dream: we can kiss after punz

 

Dream: and make cal watch



Seapeekay: why



Dream: because suffer <3



Seapeekay: youre so mean to me



Dream: its bc youre british



Seapeekay: wow </3



Technoblade: hey, look on the bright side. at least you’re not canadian.

 

Technoblade: hm. guess he’s not online. 



Dream: lumi might be suffering with math homework



Technoblade: imagine.



Dream: okay i have to go back to focusing now before mr. scott yells

 

Dream: bye tech <3



Seapeekay: what about me 



Dream: you dont get a heart bc youre a british furry /lh /j

 

Dream: bye cal <3



Seapeekay: bye, have fun <3

---

COOL KIDS

 

Tuesday, 8:13 AM

 

Sam: hey does anyone know where punz is

 

Sam: they were supposed to meet me in the library but theres no one here



Dream: dont worry about punz :) 



Sam: ???

 

Sam: dream what did you do



Dream: nothing!



Sam: dream…



Sapnap: i can confirm dream actually hasnt done anything

 

Sapnap: punz is just being possessive



Sam: that explains nothing



Dream: hes not being possessive, cmon

 

Dream: theyre just defending my honor

 

Dream: my knight in shining armor <3



Sam: wait so what happened



Dream: nothing bad dw

 

Dream: one of kaceys friends passed me and made an insulting comment

 

Dream: so punz immediately started roasting her

 

Dream: oh now farfas here



Sam: whos farfa



Sapnap: the latest addition to dreams posse of suitors



Sam: another one??



Sapnap: yup



Sapnap has attached (1) file [image3.jpg]



Sam: lmao?

 

Sam: wait that height difference is actually really funny

 

Sam: how tall is he?



Sapnap: at least as tall as you



Sam: seriously?



Sapnap: yeah lol

 

Sapnap: hes 6’7 at least

 

Sapnap: but then again dream is just short



Dream: okay shortnap



Sapnap: :( 



Sam: tell punz to meet me in the library dream



Dream: well i would

 

Dream: but now theyre talking with farfa



Sam: dream are your suitors fighting over you again



Dream: nah theyre just talking

 

Dream: well maybe theyre pretend fighting but farfa knows im taken and punz knows that im his so it should be all good

 

Dream: im just enjoying being the damsel in distress tbh



Sapnap: disney princess arc



Dream: im always on my disney princess arc

 

Dream: okay punz and i are coming now



Sam: okay lol

---

COOL KIDS

 

Tuesday, 11:45 AM

 

Technoblade: i don’t know who this farfa guy is. but someone inform him that if he does anything to dream i’m coming for him.



Illumina: *shivers*

 

Illumina: all the dream simps live in fear of techno



Tina: technos that one aroace friend whos there for emotional support



Technoblade: dream is a homeless teletubbie and he’s annoying as hell but if you hurt him i’m stabbing you.



Illumina: thats practically an “i love you” coming from you



Sapnap: maybe techno is the biggest dream simp of all



Technoblade: i’m going to punch you.



Sapnap: ok iM SORRY IM SORRY



Technoblade: too late.



Sapnap: NDSOFNIELKFLD

Notes:

this is slowly turning to chaos with a side of pissduo and dream harem and honestly i'm okay with that

maybe i'm going to try dropping some more drunz in here in the next few chapters? i also want to bring the focus back to pissduo again and give rivals/drellumina more screen time as well, but i'm also having fun writing guys simping on dream, so we'll see how it goes :)