Chapter Text
(Day 3 — 7:29 am)
The Moriarty Clan
The professor is late I hate it here
James Bonde
It’s not even 7:30 yet????
Are you here? No. I thought so. Shut up.
James Bonde
IM IN A DIFFERENT CITY NOT A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE
Sebastian Moran
Leave him alone Bonde, he’s probably begging for a distraction from Cigarette Guy. Let’s leave him to stew in his obsession.
I AM NOT OBSESSED I JUST DONT KNOW WHO WOULD USE AN IRON LIKE THAT
Fred Porlock
I duggest you ger hid number a d ask him youtrself
James Bonde
Jesus fucking Christ fred
THIS MORNING
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED THIS MORNING
Louis James Moriarty
No but you’re going to tell us anyway aren’t you
THIS MORNING HE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS IRONING HIS PENS
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
Yeah, I’m pretty sure he was not doing that
IT SURE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
Pay attention to your class, Will. Some of us have to go to work and can’t listen to you whine about Cigarette Guy
Fred Porlock
Pit your ohone on mute, then
James Bonde
I am going to end your bloodline, Fred
Fred Porlock
Jikes on you, desrx Janes, I an already gayh
James Bonde
[ben-affleck-smoking.png]
(Day 3 — 4:17 pm)
The Moriarty Clan
He’s in the fucking library
Sebastian Moran
Go say hi and leave us alone
I’m not fucking doing that what if he’s some kind of deranged former convict
Louis James Moriarty
Will, what the fuck
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
You two need your mouths washed out with soap
Louis James Moriarty
Like you weren’t screaming fuck at six this morning
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
DELETE THAT RIGHT NOW BEFORE JAMES SEES IT
James Bonde
Oh the tea is piping hot.
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
Louis, I’m going to put itching powder in your bedsheets
Louis James Moriarty
Ok but don’t wash mine with yours
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
SHUT
UP
James Bonde
No keep going
Why is this the first I’m hearing about Albert’s sex life
I think he saw me
Louis James Moriarty
Because at first I was just being a good little brother and respecting Albert’s privacy but he’s gone too fucking far now
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
[the-office-ill-kill-you.gif]
Louis James Moriarty
Can you even walk to my room after this morning
Sebastian Moran
Oh my god
[wheeze.jpg]
James Bonde
Little Louis totally snapped
I’m loving this
Louis tell us more
ARE YOU ALL IGNORING ME
James Bonde
Are YOU ignoring the fact that your brother apparently HOOKED UP with someone???
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
It is NOT a hookup!!!!!
Sebastian Moran
Oho?
Louis James Moriarty
Oh it’s not a hookup for sure. He’s whipped.
Possibly literally.
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
[the-office-ill-kill-you.gif]
[the-office-ill-kill-you.gif]
[the-office-ill-kill-you.gif]
[the-office-ill-kill-you.gif]
Fred Porlock
Dear gid, wgat have I midsed
James Bonde
Get out
I hate all of you.
(Day 3 — 6:36 pm)
The Moriarty Clan
He’s still in the library
James Bonde
What are YOU doing in the library??? It’s like 6:30 don’t you have a strict bedtime, old man?
Sebastian Moran
What library is open past 5??
The college library?????
Louis James Moriarty
It’s official. Cigarette Guy broke my brother. I’ve never seen him use extra punctuation before Cigarette Guy
James Bonde
You mean Cigarette Guy taught your brother proper texting etiquette. At least now we know what his tone is.
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
I go on a date and come back to find out that you’re STILL at the library, ogling Cigarette Guy? Honestly, Will.
I am not OGLING him
I’m OBSERVING
There’s a difference
Sebastian Moran
Potayto potahto doesn’t matter
James Bonde
Did you just spell out the phrase potato, potato
Sebastian Moran
How else am I supposed to imply that I’m using the phrase instead of just repeating the word potato???????
Do you think he studies hard or do you think he’s researching unconventional ways to use his iron?
Louis James Moriarty
Why do you even care
Ask him out already
I WILL NOT
James Bonde
Then stop staring at him every chance you get.
Fred Porlock
I agree wigh Haned
James Bonde
Who the fuck is Haned
Fred Porlock
Janned
Hamned
Nsnhed
Sebastian Moran
[wheeze.jpg]
NSNHED
FRED BUDDY HOW
Fred Porlock
James
James Bonde
…
I bet he’s reading up on ways to light his cigarette with a light fixture
Sebastian Moran
Buddy you need serious help.
Louis James Moriarty
Yeah like divine intervention
I’m going to bed I hate all of you
Albert James Moriarty (Work)
In the library???????
🖕
James Bonde
IS THAT AN ACTUAL HONEST TO GOD EMOJI
Louis James Moriarty
IT IS OH MY GOD
🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕