Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The school halls were already empty, the bell had rung about ten minutes ago. She had been caught up at the principal's office after he repeatedly welcomed her to her new school, they were ecstatic she was there —his words, not hers— and knew she'd fit right in. She highly doubted that.

Jogging through the hallways to try and find her classroom as fast as possible, she went over the right way to introduce herself and apologize for her delay. The day had barely started and she was already stressed up about it. Shiratorizawa was a big school, which did little to help her locate her class any faster. Even though she had been there a few times with her father when she was a child, the campus seemed bigger now that she was alone and with no one to guide her. It took her another five minutes to reach her destination.

Once she found the classroom, she stood outside for a few seconds to regain some composure. She straightened her skirt, not that there was any need, and summoned the courage to walk in. As soon as she set foot inside, she felt all the eyes on her which she tried to ignore as she approached the teacher's desk. She handed in the paperwork she'd been given upon arrival and bowed.

"Sorry for the interruption."

"Don't worry, the principal told me you might be late. Welcome to Shiratorizawa Miss Nak- "

"Hanako is fine." the young girl interrupted.

"Well, Hanako. There's a place at the back, why don't you get settle and let me know if there's anything I can help you with."

"Thank you."

She bowed again and headed to the back of the room. Ignoring the looks of her classmates, she hurried to her place. Every movement felt stiff and she wondered if it looked as uncomfortable as it felt. Hanako kept her eyes glued to the floor.

The available desk was quite literally at the back, being the last one of the line. It wasn't ideal but at least she wouldn't have to worry about prying eyes behind her. She sat and took out her notebook and pencil case. When she looked up to follow the rest of the lecture, she almost cursed out loud. In front of her was a boy with a ridiculous height, ridiculous broad shoulders and a ridiculous straight stance that made him seem like a soldier. She moved slightly to her left and then to her right, trying to see what the teacher was writing on the board. All to no avail. It was like a fucking brick wall.

"You gotta be kidding me," she complained under her breath. A soft chuckle was heard and she looked to her left to find a redhead with googly eyes amused to see her struggling. She glared at him before trying again to see the board. Once she realized there was no point, she gave up and started doodling on her notebook.

Two hours later, the bell rang signaling recess. Hanako cleared her throat to attract the attention of the giant in front of her. He didn't move an inch. Annoyed, she made an even louder noise, between her classmates talking and the noise from the halls maybe he hadn't heard her. Still no response. She was about to tap on his shoulder when she was interrupted by the same guy with flashy eyes to her left.

"Yo, Wakatoshi," he said with a singsong kind of voice and the giant turned his attention to him "New girl wants to talk to you."

The giant —Wakatoshi, she noted to herself— looked at him confused until the redhead pointed him to her direction. Finally, he looked at her.

"Hi, I'm Hanako," she introduced herself with a smile and waited for him to do the same. All she got in response was a subtle nod.

"Wakatoshi, where are your manners?" the redhead intervened, jokingly berating him "Introduce yourself, give new girl a nice and warm welcome."

"Ushijima Wakatoshi," he said as he bowed lightly. "Is she your friend?"

"Nope."

"It's rude to call her by a nickname if you're not friends," Ushijima pointed out.

Before the redhead had a chance for a witty response, Hanako spoke:

"Sorry to interrupt, I was wondering if we could switch seats."

"Why?"

"Well, I can't see."

"Do you have an eye problem?"

"Right now, is more of a you problem," she answered, getting annoyed.

"I don't understand."

"I can see that."

"So, you don't have an eye problem?"

The redhead burst out laughing at the exchange. Hanako rolled her eyes and ignored him. She took a deep breath and gathered all the patience she had, which wasn't much to begin with.

"You're too tall and broad, I can't see with you sitting in front."

Without a word, Ushijima turned around and she was left looking at his back, again.

She was about to give him the whole dictionary of insults when he stood up, grabbing his backpack and the few things on his desk.

"Oh... thank you," she said, almost in a whisper while she hurried to gather her things and change seats.

Relieved, she noticed that, without the giant, the classroom board was completely accessible from her new desk. She took out her notebook to copy what was left from the last lecture. As soon as she started writing, she felt a pocking on her left arm. She turned to find the redhead offering his notebook. Hanako hesitated but took it anyway.

"Thanks..."

"Tendo Satori, at your service," he said and saluted her like a military man would.

Hanako couldn't suppress the laugh that came out of her.

"So, what brings you to the magical land of Shiratorizawa Academy?"

"My Hogwarts' letter got lost in the mail."

Tendo looked at her with squinted eyes and a half smile, seemingly pleased. Before he could ask anything else, the bell rang again and a woman in her late 50s that looked like the real life Trunchbull walked in. It was their math teacher, who had no better idea than to start the school year with a quick test to assess their knowledge. Lucky for Hanako, she loved math.

She was the first one to finish and used the rest of the time to copy the previous assignment from Tendo's notebook. After an hour, the teacher collected the few tests from the classmates that hadn't finished yet. With a disapproving face, she paraded between the rows until she reached the desk behind Hanako.

"No luck?" miss Trunchbull asked Ushijima, he simply gave her back the test. "Looks like our bright star may not be that bright after all."

"Rude," Hanako whispered to herself.

Miss Trunchbull —the girl hadn't paid attention to her introduction, too distracted by the uncanny resemblance— was already walking back to front of the class when she stopped midtrack. Slowly, she turned to face Hanako.

"Miss Nakamura, right?"

"I prefer Hanako," she answered with a smile that she hoped would soften her teacher's tone. It didn't.

"Is that so?"

"But I'm cool with Nakamura, too," she blurted out.

"Oh, you're cool with it," the teacher mocked her. "Well, Miss Nakamura, I'm cool with a simple reward and punishment system as a teaching method. Are you cool with that too, Hanako?"

"Cool as an icicle."

"Cool," Trunchbull repeated, emphasizing the o. "But you know, if you happen to have any problem with it, you can always stay after hour to think it through during suspension. Is that alright with you?"

Hanako gave her a thumbs up while avoiding eye contact and sank herself further into her seat, hoping it'll be over soon. Satisfied with the fear imprinted on her student, Miss Trunchbull turned around and continued with the rest of the class.

By lunchtime, Hanako was starving. She wanted to hurry to the cafeteria, fearing that arriving late might cause her to wait even longer, but once she set foot outside the classroom, she realized she had no idea where to go. Before she could freak out, she heard a whistle which made her turn. It was Tendo.

"Cafeteria is this way, new girl."

"Hanako," she replied, slightly annoyed, but followed him anyway.

They were walking close behind another group of their classmates, among which was Ushijima. She noticed they were all extremely tall. Hanako was by no means small, with 5' 9'', but even Tendo, who appeared to be shorter due to his crouching, was taller than her.

"If I call you Hanako, would you tell me where you're from?" Tendo asked, interrupting her thoughts.

"Tokyo."

He looked at her with squinted eyes but said nothing. She recognized that look immediately, ever since she could remember, she'd gotten looks like that. She knew most weren't ill intended, but it pissed her off to have to address it so often.

"My dad is Japanese, mom from the States," she explained. It was usually her wavy hair and softer features that gave her away.

"Cool."

"I guess."

The rest of the way was silent, except for Tendo's humming. The school's cafeteria was like any other, you formed in line and then an old lady serves you lunch. Hanako ended up behind a boy with ashy hair. Out of the group, he was probably the shortest one.

"Tch Tch," Tendo said behind her. "Semi-Semi were you raised by wolves?"

The boy in front of her turned around with a deep frown on his face.

"What now, Tendo?"

"Ladies first," he replied smirking. It was clear he enjoyed messing with his classmate.

At this, Semi-Semi seemed taken aback. He looked at Hanako and a slight blush appeared on his face.

"Sorry, I didn't see you there," he said apologetic and step aside to let her through.

"You two giants too. God, I have to teach you all manners."

"That's really not necessary," Hanako interrupted, gesturing with her hands but, before she could say anything else, Tendo pushed her past the boys while she looked down ashamed and thanked them. In a matter of seconds, she was holding a tray full of food and the redhead was escorting her to a table.

They sat next to each other with the other boys in front. Finally, Hanako had the chance to give them a good look. In the middle, right in front of her, was a boy with brown skin, black hair and big lips. To his right, sat Ushijima, he was focused on his food and was stoic as ever. On the other side was Semi-Semi, he had his eyes averted and still seemed embarrassed enough to not look at her.

"I don't think we've been properly introduced, I'm Ohira Reon," he said with a cheerful smile.

"Hanako," she said trying to copy his amicable demeanor.

"I know, you're the one who pissed off miss Yamagawa."

She rolled her eyes annoyed.

"She was being unnecessarily rude."

"She always is, that's why you shouldn't talk back to her."

"I could've used that information before."

Reon laughed and took a bite at his food.

"So, where are you from, Hanako?"

"Tokyo. Japanese dad, American mom," Tendo explained for her. This earned him a glare from the girl, which he didn't seem upset about.

"You came to Miyagi from Tokyo?" Reon asked incredulously, she simply nodded. "Why?"

Hanako shrugged, "The smog didn't suit my allergies." The boy gave her a puzzled look, unsatisfied by the answer, so she clarified, "I grew up in the States, we moved back to Japan a couple years ago, but Tokyo just wasn't for me. My dad studied here, so it seemed like a good option."

"Your accent barely shows," said Reon.

"Thanks."

"What school did you attend in Tokyo?" This time it was Tendo asking.

"Fukurodani."

"That's a good one."

Hanako hummed in agreement and brushed it off, not wanting to discuss it further. She started eating and the boys followed suit while they bickered with each other. The rest of lunch went smoothly, Hanako was finishing her juice when she heard someone calling out her name.

"Hey, Nakamura," a tall blonde girl was standing next to her. Hand on her hip, she was looking down at Hanako. "I was waiting for you to come find me, but Keiko asked me to be a bit more proactive."

"Do I know you?" Hanako asked confused. The innocent question seemed to bother the blonde girl.

"You played against us last year," she said, but saw no sign of recognition in her features. "Nationals’ quarterfinals."

Finally, Hanako remembered. "Oh," was all she said. This annoyed the blonde even more.

"You never told me you play volleyball," Tendo interrupted. "That's cool, we play volleyball too," his eyes were wide open, a renewed enthusiasm shining bright in them. "And you beat us, you must be good."

"She was the player of the tournament and made Tara cry with a serve," the girl intervened. "Whatever, Keiko asked me to give you this and tell you practice starts at five," she explained while handing her a sheet of paper. Hanako didn't need to read it to know what it was and to know she wanted nothing to do with it, so she simply stared at the stretch hand in front of her. "Are you really playing hard to get?" The blonde was just about ready to kick her ass.

"Not at all, I'm just not playing anymore."

Suddenly, everyone was staring at her like she was an alien. Even Ushijima, who had been in his own world throughout the entirety of lunch, was looking at her with a scowl.

"Why would you stop playing?" he asked with the same fierce expression.

Hanako looked at him for a few seconds, taken aback by his intensity, before shrugging. It was nobody's business.

"Are you injured?" The blonde girl asked, Hanako shook her head. "You're weird," she pointed out and left the sheet of paper next to her on the table. "In case you come to your senses."

"Thanks," Hanako replied sarcastically, but made no attempt to grab the paper. She watched as the blonde went back to a table full of other girls that were looking at her from afar.

While the others had taken a hint from her reluctancy to discuss the subject, Wakatoshi seemed to have taken personal offense to her decision. He hadn't peeled his eyes off her for the remainder of lunch, it was unnerving. She was thankful when the bell rang, not wanting another second under Ushijima's intimidating stare.

She followed Tendo back to the classroom, ignoring the piercing eyes on her back.

After class, Tendo walked her to the women's dorms. It wasn't that far away from the men's and his volleyball practice wouldn't start for another hour.

"What's the deal with Ushijima?"

Tendo stopped midtrack. He was smirking, "Am I sensing love in the air?" She looked at him horrified and blushed. The boy burst out laughing, "It's okay, nothing to be ashamed of," he pressed, Hanako was beginning to look like a tomato. "Although, as your friend, I should warn you there's a really long line and he's absolutely oblivious to it."

"I don't like him," she said when she recovered from the shock. "He's just off putting, that's why I asked you."

"Yeah, he can be a bit intense sometimes."

"Well, that's an understatement."

"Don't worry, he doesn't bite. So... nationals?"

Hanako shrugged again. Tendo had assumed she'd opened up if it was just them, maybe she had scene panic before. Apparently, he was wrong.

"Sorry, don't mean to pry."

"Sure you do. I don't mind, I just don't have anything to say about it," she explained. "Sorry to disappoint." Tendo gave her a questioning look, not buying it, but chose to let it be for now.

Not before long, they had arrived at the dorms and bid farewell to each other. Hanako was about to get on with homework, when she heard a knock on her bedroom door. Unwillingly, she stood up to answer. As soon as she saw who it was, she wished she hadn't.  

Chapter Text

“Change and get your ass to the gym before I call your dad to talk some sense into you.”

Coach Washijo was not a man of many words and there was a reason for that. He said what he needed and left, knowing full well Hanako would follow not long after. Not wanting to drag her suffering, the girl grabbed her old gym bag and put a change of clothes and a pair of sneakers. Whatever the old man had in store for her, it was better to just get it over with. She quickly changed into black shorts and a white tank top and headed for the gym where the men’s volleyball team practiced.

Even with a map of the school in hand, Hanako still got lost. She wasn’t the best at following directions. When she finally found the gym, she could hear noise from inside. Hanako checked her phone and it was twenty ‘till six. Practice must’ve started earlier. But when she pushed through the doors, she was surprised to find only two people. Coach Washijo watched as Ushijima shoot the ball to the other side of the gym with his serve. The gym roared upon impact. It was like lighting had struck.

“Out!” The old man screamed. “Stop, that’s enough for now. Go find the vests jerseys for practice.”

Hanako watched him dissappear behind one of the side doors. When she looked back at the old man, he was already staring at her. She changed her shoes and walked up to him.

“Looks like you still have one functioning neurone,” his tone was cold as ice. “Good, twenty laps around the gym. Maybe you’ll find whatever’s left of your common sense.”

Hanako sighed loudly but obliged. She tied her hair on a tight ponytail, streched for a minute and started running. Having known the man for her entire life, she knew better than to thriffle with him. It’s not like she was scared of him, Washijo was like an old and grumpy grandfather to her, but he could be irrational at times and it was always better to be on his good favour when that happened.

After three laps, she felt her muscles starting to burn. It was a familiar sensation, one she hadn’t realized she missed. A few more laps and the aching gave way to a surge of energy, this too she knew all too well. She sped up then, feeling confident in her pace. All the tension from her first day was fading, all the knots coming undone. She ran even faster, wanting to leave every worry behind. It was envigorating. She felt light as a feather.

Until she hit the brick wall.

It took her a few seconds to put together what had happened. She should’ve been with her face on the floor, body aching from the impact. Instead, she was staring straight into a pair olive eyes. Despite his hard demeanor, his body felt soft beneath her and the hands he’d placed on her hips —most likely to save her from hitting the floor— were gentle.

“Did a tell you to take a nap?” Coach Washijo’s yell took her out of her trance.

She stared at Ushijima horrified after understanding the full extent of their compromising situation. Hanako moved aside inmediately and stood up, putting some well needed distance between the two. The boy followed suit.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you,” he said as he bowed. She was thankful her red face from running could mask her blushing. Meanwhile, the boy seemed as composed as ever.

“Don’t worry, me neither,” Hanako brushed it off before resuming her run.

When she was three laps away from finishing, another boy walked into the gym. She didn’t recognize him from class and he looked older. It must be one of the third year students, she thought. He greeted Ushijima with a wide tooth smile and a pat on the back. As he talked, Wakatoshi listen to him attentively, taking mental notes of every word. The captain.

When she ran past them, the older one noticed her. They exchanged looks for a second before she left them behind, but when she was on the other side of the gym she saw them staring at her. The older boy asked something and Ushijima shrugged.

Another lap and she was done. Hanako walked to her bag and took out her water bottle. She looked at the boys again, the older one smiled and waved at her. She waved back. Taking it as an invitation, he trotted to where she was standing.

“Nakamura, right?” He asked, Hanako nodded. “Keiko told me about you, she was thrilled to have you on the team.”

“I’m not on the team.”

“Right, she told me that too,” the smile on his face was like he knew something Hanako didn’t, it should have bothered her but his presence was reassuring somehow. “What are you doing here?”

“Hanako!” There was no need to turn to know who was calling. “Are you lost again?” Tendo was walking up to her. He arrived with the rest of his teammates, some of which Hanako didn’t recognize, and their other coach. “New girl’s not the best with directions,” he explained addressing the older boy once he reached them. Satori placed a hand on her shoulder but took it away inmediately, “Ugh, why are you all sweaty?”  

“When you’re done socializing, Kaito, perhaps you can set the example and start warm ups,” coach Washijo suggested in a threatening tone. The older boy straighten up upon hearing him, a fleeing look of fear taking hold of him before being replaced by his usual grin.

Kaito trotted to where the rest of the team was, “Come on, boys. Stop slacking around.” Of course, they all followed him as he started streching.  

Hanako took the opportunity to grab her stuff and leave. Before she could change her shoes, coach Washijo’s voice made her freeze, “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Me and my common sense need to go back to my room so I can finish my english homework.”

“You think you’re funny now?”

“That’s insane,” she replied. “I always think I’m funny.”

“Another five laps,” he demanded. Hanako was about to talk back to him when he glared at her. Do not engage, she reminded herself.

She throwed her bag on the floor and started running, again. When she started the second lap, the team joined her. They were looking at her confused, but no one dare question coach Washijo’s intentions. She sped up, leaving them behind. All but one.

Ushijima was running next to her, although he probably wasn’t aware. He had a deep frown and seemed focus on the task at hand. He only noticed her when she ran past him. He sped up until he was ahead. Stubborn as she was, Hanako refused to be left behind. Unfourtunately, her fastest pace was only enough to reach him. Once she was next to Ushijima, he looked at her with the same ferocity he’d used at lunch.

“What are you doing here?” He spoke with ease, completely unnaffected by the pace.  

Even if she wanted to, she wouldn’t have been able to answer. Her lungs were burning from the effort. She looked straight ahead and ignored him. After a few more laps, they were the first ones to finish. Hanako almost bended in half with her hands on her knees as she tried to catch some air. Ushijima was drinking water as he looked down on her.

“You shouldn’t have tried to keep up,” he said almost with disdain.

She straighten up and smirked at him, “No idea what you’re talking about.”  She walked to where Washijo and the other coach were sitting. “Can I leave now?” The old man paid no attention to her. “Pretty please,” she insisted.

“Akira prep the boys for a practice match,” he ordered. The other coach stood up inmediately, leaving them alone. “Are you ready to go beg coach Yamatoya to let you into the team?”

Hanako let out a dry laugh, “So, that’s what this is about? You think you can annoy me into changing my mind? I’m afraid my determination is not that weak.”

“Determintation? You’re stubborn.”

“Well, then I’m determined to be stubborn. And I can assure you, your patience will run out faster than my stubborness. Why don’t you cut your losses and just let me go? Save yourself the embarrasment.”

The look the old man gave her was the exact reason why it was better not to engage with him, as soon as she saw it, she knew she was in trouble. Actual trouble.

“Perhaps I should call your father, I’m sure he’ll be a better match for your stubborness.”

A chill ran down her spine. “Have you talked to him recently?”

“I have,” Washijo finally laid eyes on her. “I’m sorry,” he sounded sincere. It did nothing to comfort her. “But that’s how I know you’re being unreasonable. In a few months, you’ll change your mind. I thought I might save you some time.”

“Thanks, but there’s no need. I just don’t wanna do it anymore.”

Washijo stared at her for a few seconds, “You are young,” he pointed out.”You’ll be fine.” She smiled half heartedly, almost hoping he was right. “Now, go to the storage closet, you’re on cleaning duties today.”

She sighed in annoyance, but it was hard to be mad at the old man.

The layout of the match seemed unfair. She wasn’t sure which students were from the starting line up, but seeing Ushijima and Tendo playing on the same team she realized was a clear advantage. Their setter was a first year, Shirabu she’d learned, but even his uncertain sets were succesful once combined with Ushijima’s unstopable force. On the other team, Semi Semi’s reliable sets were met with ease by the spikers, but around a third were slammed to the floor by Tendo’s blocks.

When the first match was over, Washijo made them gathered to yell at them their mistakes. She thought some of the first years were about to faint from fear. He made some ajustment to both teams before the second match. Some merely of rotation, others of players.

“Hanako,” he called out to her. The girl was running with a mop drying the sweat from the floor. She changed directon and ran to his side, hitting his feet with the mop as she arrived. “Watch it,” he reprimended. “You’re setting, Semi I want you practicing spikes and your serve.” Everyone looked at him confused, specially Hanako.

“I think I’ll pass,” she said.

“Are you afraid I’ll slam all your sets to the floor?” Tendo mocked. “Don’t worry, I’ll go easy on you.” Before she was able to bite back at him, Ushijima spoke, “Practice won’t be helpful if we have to measure ourselves.”

Hanako let out a laugh,”You’re on, golden boy. And please, don’t stop on my account,” she said as she arranged her ponytail. “I can keep up.”

The first two points were won by Ushijima’s serve. Finally, the libero was able to lift the third one. It wasn’t a perfect pass, Hanako had to jump to reach it so that it wouldn’t pass to the other side of the net. She pushed it to the left where she knew Reon would be waiting, it wasn’t a perfect pass but it was enough for him to slam it behind Tendo where none of the other players could reach.

Hanako looked at her friend satisfied. “That was luck,” Satori pointed out. She stuck out her tongue in response.

Kaito was serving for her team. One of the players digged up the ball and Shirabu set it perfectly for Ushijima. Another point for him. How annoying. The match was just starting and he was already getting on her nerves. Breathe. Relax. Focus. Repeat. She had been doing it since she was a child, practicing with her dad on the backyard. It was as easy as breathing for her.

Another serve that was lifted off the ground, this time it was a good pass to Hanako, she had time to think what to do. Semi Semi could be used as a decoy for Kaito. It was a safe choice. She looked at him and prepared to set, Tendo moved in response. At the last second, she went for a feint.

“For the record,” she spoke at Satori, who was staring at the place where the ball had fallen. “I didn’t just played nationals, I won them.” Tendo looked at her through squinted eyes. “And it wasn’t luck,” she stated.

He gave her the fakest of smiles, “Congratulations.”

The rest of the match went on evenly, both teams unable to gain a substantial advantage. In the end, Ushijima’s team won by a point, but she wasn’t as pissed as she thought she would be. She was actually having fun.

“That’s enough for today,” coach Akira announced. “Good job, everybody.”

Hanako sat on the floor to stretch, Tendo followed her grinning, “No hards feeling?” He said offering his hand.

“None at all,” she fist bump him. “But you only won because your friend is a freak, so get off your high horse.”

“He’s really something,” he sounded proud.   

“Yeah, he is,” she agreed whilst staring at the ace. He was laying on the ground, stretching. Her mind went back to the moment they shared earlier. She blushed and looked away.

“You can leave once you help them clean,” Washijo was standing next to her. “Same time tomorrow,” he stated before leaving, leaving no room for an answer.

“What’s up with that?” Tendo asked once the old man had already left the gym. “Is he your grandfather?”

Hanako bursted out laughing, “Did the height gave us away?” She was around two heads taller than him. “He’s an old friend of my family and by old I mean really old. He went to high school with my grandfather and then coached my dad when he studied here. I’ve known him since I was a child and he got me into the school.”

“That sounds a lot like family.”

“I guess.”

After a few minutes, they started cleaning up. Hanako went around asking for the vest jerseys to take them to the laundry room. “Semi Semi,” she called him. “I’m gonna need that,” she pointed to his chest, he was still wearing the vest. “Yeah, sure,” as he took it off his shirt went up slightly and she noticed his muscular build. He handed the vest. “Thanks,” she turned around to leave but his voice made her turn again. “It’s Semi, not Semi Semi. That’s just what Tendo says to annoy me.” Hanako blushed embarrased, “Sorry, I thought,” he interrupted, “It’s okay, don’t worry.”

“Semi Semi,” Tendo called out from the other side of the gym. “Lose the lovey dovey eyes and help me with a mop.” The boy went red as Satori’s hair as soon as he heard him. Semi started following him around the gym until Kaito grabbed them both by the collar of their shirts to school them.

Hanako laughed as she watched them and continued picking up the vests. Once she was sure she had them all, she went to the laundry room to leave them so the cleaning crew could take care of them in the morning. She stared out the window, noticing it was already dark outside.

When she turned to go back, she almost had a heart attack. Ushijima was standing by the door. “God, you scared me to death. What are you doing?” She asked with a hand still clutched to her chest.

“Kaito gave me the keys to stay after practice.”

“Congratulations?”

She walked past him back to the gym. He followed her. “Would you set for me?” Hanako’s jaw was on the floor, her whole face must’ve been a poem. He cleared his throat, “Please?”

“No,” she answered once the shock passed. He frowned.

“Why not?”

“It’s late and I don’t like you.”

“You don’t know me.”

“Another good reason to not lose sleep over you. Ask someone else.”

She grabbed her bag and started changing her shoes. Ushijima followed close behind.

“Why did you quit?” Hanako ignored him. “You are a great player, there’s no reason for you to quit.”

“Why do you even care?” Hanako stood up to face him. “It’s not like you’re losing a teammate.”

He frowned, “It doesn’t make sense.”

Hanako stared in disbelief. “So I should keep playing volleyball cause it doesn’t make sense to you that I don’t?” She was hoping that saying it out loud he’ll notice how absurd it sounded, but his frowned didn’t move an inch. Defeated, she turned around to leave.

“Does it make sense to you?” He asked.

She kept on walking without looking back at him. Truth was she wasn’t so sure now, but he didn’t have to know.   

Chapter Text

Hell would’ve been a good vacation from the body horror she was experiencing right now. The last week had taken a toll on her body, Coach Washijo had made sure of it. Every day after class, she had less than an hour to finish homework if she wanted to be on time to help set up everything for volleyball practice. And she wanted to be, it was the best way to avoid the endless warm up laps —that stretched until Washijo felt like it— or the threats of calling her father.

Every muscle in her body ached, she wondered how —if ever— she had been able to endure such torture before. She slumped into her seat at the back of the classroom. To arrive early after postponing her alarm three times, she had to skip breakfast. This did nothing to apace her aching. Hanako buried her face on the desk in front of her, it was hard and cold and the best pillow she could ask for. She closed her eyes. Just for a second, she lied to herself.

Next thing she knew, she was being awoken by a loud noise. There was a big book on her desk and Miss Trunchbull was looking down on her.

“How kind of you to join us, Miss Nakamura,” she teased. “Page 11.” 

She sat up straight and held back a groan. She needed a nap and a warm bath, none of which she was getting anytime soon. Tendo’s stifled laugh annoyed her further. For the remainder of the class, she did her best to stay awake. She almost jumped from joy when the bell rang. Instead, she sank into the desk, arms crossed in front to use as a pillow. Her brown wavy hair shielding her face from the light.

Just when she was about to fall asleep, her stomach started growling. This time, Tendo couldn’t hide his amusement. She glared at him.

“What’s so funny?”

“You have drool on your chin,” Hanako covered her mouth horrified and Tendo busted out laughing. She threw a pencil at him when she realized he was lying, which he easily avoided. “How are you so tired? I thought you won nationals, and it wasn’t just luck,” he said giving a poor impression of her.

“I haven’t trained in months,” she hid her face on her arms again. “Now, let me sleep.”

Another poke on her shoulder. She sat up, ready to bark at Tendo for his inability to leave her alone but was surprised to find Ushijima handing her a protein bar. He said nothing as he waited for her to take it. Hanako did so hesitantly, “Thanks.” He gave her a subtle nod.

The rest of the morning was uneventful, between classes she would stretch in her seat trying to get rid of the soreness all over her body.  When lunchtime came, Hanako stood up lazily and grabbed her backpack while she complained about the weight.

“You do know we have lockers for that, right?” Tendo asked.

She rolled her eyes, too tired to come up with a witty response, “Would it be impossible for you to help me while you mock me?”

“I can help you,” Ushijima’s deep voice interrupted them. He was standing in front of her, and she had to bend her neck up to look at him. His expression was stoic as ever.

“No, thanks,” she replied.

At this, he frowned. “Why not?”

“Because you’re being weird, and I don’t want you to know where my stuff is.”

He was about to object when Semi spoke, “I’ll walk you.”

Hanako followed him out of the classroom, she looked back one last time and saw Ushijima talking with Tendo, genuine confusion in his face.

“Is he always like that?”

“Never,” Semi answered without hesitation. “But I can see the appeal,” Hanako blushed at the insinuation, “for him, I mean,” he explained. “It’s kinda cool that you won on a national level,” from the corner of his eye he saw her go an even deeper shade of red. She mumbled a ‘thanks’, brushing it off. Her reluctancy to discuss the subject perked his interest, he imagined it was the same for his teammate.

Although it wasn’t just that, Hanako was undeniably beautiful. Her fair skin and prominent cheekbones were impossible to overlook. She had brown eyes that matched her hair, most of the time she seemed bored or even annoyed, but when something caught her attention, her eyes would open wide, brimming with excitement. It was dumb, he had only met her that week, yet there was this feeling set on his stomach ever since that was impossible to ignore.

“Here,” he stopped next to a locker. Hanako tried the combination that she had been given during admission and it worked. She smiled at him gratefully, “Thanks.” Semi smiled back without saying a word, he stood next to her carrying some of her books while she organized everything. When she was done with that, Hanako took out a magnet from her bag, it latched onto the locker door instantly. Semi was barely able to give it a good look before Hanako slammed the door shut, but it was good enough to noticed it was a picture of her with a boy.

The feeling that set on his stomach upon seeing it was also hard to ignore.

“I was wondering,” he looked everywhere but her as he spoke. They were walking to the cafeteria for lunch, “If it’s not too much to ask, I’d like to practice with you.”

Hanako scowled. “I don’t mind, but I’m not sure I’ll be of any help. Washijold might rate me as a player, but I’m not a setter he’d pick for his team.”

Semi pondered her words. Hanako was right, he knew that. So, why was he even asking? “Still, I could use some practice with my spikes and serves.”

She shrugged. “We can work on that after your usual training. But only a couple of times a week and never more than an hour. I’m not sacrificing anymore sleep over sweaty boys.” Hanako stopped in her tracks, “And I want chocolate.”

Tendo waved at them from the cafeteria table where he was sitting with Ushijima. She walked towards them with Semi following close behind, when she was a few steps away, the ace stood up to help her accommodate on the chair next to him. She looked down at her friend, who was covering his mouth to hide his laugh. Whatever this is, she thought, he’s behind it. She sat leaving the tray of food on the table while Ushijima accompanied her moves with the chair.

She looked up to find Semi sitting across from her, as confused as she was. Good, she wasn’t imagining things. “Spit it out,” she said to Tendo. “Why is golden boy being so attentive all the sudden?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he replied with a smirk.

“Tendo said you might set for me if I was nice to you,” Ushijima explained at the same time. This earned him a nasty stare from the redhead which, of course, went unnoticed.

“And that made sense to you?” This time it was Semi asking.

“Yes.”

“Are you really so cruel to ignore the pleads of a classmate, Hanako?” Tendo spoke dramatically, hoping to get his friend off the hook.

“I’m not pleading,” Ushijima interrupted.

“There you go, it’s not cruel to ignore him, then.”

Ushijima’s eyes narrowed as he gazed at her, he looked like he was trying to understand some old mystery of the universe instead of talking with a seventeen year old girl. It was unsettling, “What are you looking at?”

Finally, he took his eyes off her. Deep frown on his face as he continued to eat in silence.

She glanced at yet another service ace. Ushijima was truly on fire, much to her dislike. Ever since lunch, all attempts at politeness or friendliness had stopped. The ace went back to ignoring her and everything other than volleyball. That was okay with her. Hanako would never admit it out loud, but he was magnetic on the field. Even if she had wanted to look away, her eyes wouldn’t have obeyed her. After four aces in a row, the ball went out, ending Ushijima’s good streak.

Today, the old man had been kind to her, he only had her do twenty warm up laps before putting her on cleaning duties for the rest of practice. She was on the sidelines, mop in hand while she watched the match that was unfolding in front of her. As usual, Ushijima’s team was winning. After a few more points, they won the final set, and the training was over for the day.

It was Friday and most of the boys seemed eager to leave. She went around gathering the jersey vests to leave in the laundry room. When she reached Ushijima, the ace was laying on the floor stretching. Next to him was the neatly folded vest and Hanako had to bend over to grab it. He didn’t bother thanking her like the rest of his teammates. “You’re welcome,” she said sarcastically. A momentary glance between them confirmed he had heard her but whether it had annoyed him or not, she had no idea. He gave nothing away.

Once Hanako was back in the gym from the laundry room, she found only Semi, Tendo and Ushijima left. She couldn’t hear what they were talking about, but it was clear the redhead was messing with Semi. She approached the two while the ace practiced his serves.

“So, what shall we do first?” Hanako asked Semi.

“If you could just set, that’d be great.”

“Sure…” Her eyes flickered to where Ushijima was standing, only a few meters away from them. With him there, there was no room to practice without getting caught in the crossfire. Tendo seemed to understand her dilemma.

“Wakatoshi,” he called out in a singing voice. The ace stopped what he was doing immediately, paying close attention to the redhead, “Right now is a good moment to practice being nice with our new friend. Whatcha say?”

He hesitated, clearly unhappy about the prospect of cutting his training short for her. Still, he left the ball he was holding with the rest and walked past them to sit on the bench. Hanako looked at the other boys to assess their reactions, while Tendo appeared satisfied with his friends, Semi looked as surprised as she was. Before she could overthink it, Tendo interrupted her thoughts.

“Alrighty, I pass to you, and you set for Semi Semi. Right?”

For half an hour, they did the same over and over again.

“I think I’m good for today,” Semi spoke after slamming the ball on the other side of the gym. His hand was starting to get numb from the endless hitting and he saw the exhaustion on Hanako’s face. Although she’d been clear about not wanting to devote much of her time to helping him, he had the suspicion she would never admit it if she was tired. He offered her a bottle of water while they caught their breath.

“I can go a few rounds more,” she stated. Semi was about to object when he realized she wasn’t talking to him. A pair of olive eyes was staring back at her in search of confirmation, “But I understand if you’re too tired.”

Without exchanging words, he stood up and walked to the end of the court. The air in the gym suddenly felt heavier like charged with some rabid energy. A feeling of unease set deep in her stomach, why was she suddenly so nervous? She had to remind herself to breathe. Hanako cleaned her hands against her shorts and signaled Tendo to pass her the ball.

As soon as the ball left his hands, Ushijima sprinted forward. Without everyone else around, the place was silent enough to hear the thud from the impulse he took. She was not in his way, yet she had to fight the instinct to step back. She was too focused on the pass Tendo gave her to look at him, but she wondered if he too was fighting back that impulse or if he’d grown immune to Ushijima’s presence.

In a short stride, he was ready to jump just as the ball was reaching Hanako’s hands. Breathe, breathe, breathe. The ball touched her hands for less than a second, yet it was enough. It went right towards Ushijima and as he slammed it effortlessly. It had been a perfect pass; she was sure of it. That was until she saw the ace: he was staring at his palm and then back at the place where the ball had bounced. His frown had only deepened, conflict evident on his face. Was it too low? Too high? Too fast or too slow? No, no, no. It was perfect.

She took a step back when Ushijima turned to her. He had gone back to his usual demeanor; it was like staring at a blank piece of paper.

“Thank you,” he said in a monotone voice and went ahead to lower the net, putting an end to his practice.

The rest of them followed and soon enough they were ready to turn the lights off. Ushijima hadn’t said another word, although none of his teammates seemed worried about it. They walked her to the dorm, all too tired to engage in small talk. Tendo’s soothing humming was the only background noise.

“Thanks,” she said once they arrived. “Good night,” both her friends said. She waved them goodbye as they turned to leave. She must have imagined it but, when they were just meters away, she thought she saw Ushijima looking at her over his shoulder.

Chapter Text

On Sunday morning, Hanako decided to go out for a run. Just because she wasn't playing anymore didn't mean she should neglect her training and health. She started off easy, at a slow pace she could maintain without much effort. The streets were almost empty, the fresh and cold air helped her shake off the last remnants of sleep. Hanako figured she had an hour before the first local shops opened and the smell of coffee guided her to the nearest cafeteria; and so, she sped up slightly, trying to make the most of her time.

The birds were chirping, and the first sunrays were a welcome caress to her skin. Although she’d grown fond of Tokyo in the couple of years she’d lived there, she was grateful for the tranquility that the countryside provided. The trees were starting to bloom, a sign of the incoming spring, creating an interesting contrast between the ones that had already blossomed and the bare ones, still stuck in winter.

A thought arose, it would be wonderful if she too had seasons, then she would know there was an ending to her sadness. She’d know when the new leaves would grow, even if she couldn’t pinpoint the exact date, there would be certainty. Somewhere around April.

Lost in thought, she didn’t notice when she reached the intersection. Suddenly, she was yanked by her arm away from the street. A loud honk from the delivery truck that was crossing was the last thing she needed to be brought back to reality. The hand on her arm was still holding her firmly, she turned around to thank her guardian angel but was met by piercing olive eyes.

“Were you not listening?” Ushijima spoke before her, his frown was deeper than usual and his voice came out like a bark. 

“What?” Hanako asked, taken aback by the harsh tone.

“I yelled at you to stop. You should be more careful”

Hanako pushed his hand away, annoyed by the nagging. “Will do, golden boy,” she said flashing the most insincere of smiles. The light turned green and she bolted.

She couldn’t run a block before he was by her side. Hanako sped up, but the ace easily followed the pace she’d set. A few blocks went by and she was starting to feel her muscles burn. Meanwhile, he was unaffected, which irked her even further.

“Why do you call me that?”

Hanako came to a halt in the middle of the sidewalk, “What?”

“Golden boy.”

She had a hard time trying to guess whether he was offended by it or merely curious. Finally, she shrugged in response. “Isn’t that what you are?” Confusion took over his face upon hearing her, like it was the first time he’d given it any thought. “Is the way everyone talks about you and how they look at you. The moment I learned you played volleyball, I had no doubt you were Shiratorizawa’s famous ace,” she explained. “And the way you carry yourself just confirmed it.”

“How I carry myself,” he repeated trying to make sense of what she said.

“Like being the best player in the prefecture puts you above everyone else. The whole school goes along with it, hence… golden boy.”

“I don’t see the problem with being confident in my skills.”

“There’s such a thing as too much confidence.”

“I disagree.”

“Well, I don’t,” she said abruptly, fed up by the exchange.

Ushijima stared at her for a moment before speaking, “I would rather you address me by my name.”

She laughed dryly, “If golden boy rathers… Can I go now?”

Without waiting for the answer, Hanako started running again. The chat had given her enough time to catch her breath, she was near the end of the circuit she’d planned so she didn’t mind putting on an extra effort if it meant leaving the ace behind and resuming with what was —up to that point— a perfect Sunday morning.

Unfortunately, Ushijima seemed determined to ruin her day. He ran past her heading up the same hill she was planning to. Looking at her over his shoulder, Hanako noticed a glint in his eyes. She’d seen it many times before, just not on him; it was on the faces of those she played against, and it came from the excitement of outplaying her —even if just momentarily. She hated that glint, it always awoke her most competitive strand.

She ran as fast as her legs allowed, praying not to trip over and roll down the hill, always looking at the ace’s back. She managed to catch him in the last meters, when the slope had decreased. When they reached the top, they did so at the same time, almost in synchrony.

“Ha! I won,” exclaimed Hanako. As soon as the words left her mouth, she bent over and started coughing. Her throat was dry and burning and she felt a metallic taste in her mouth. She’d pushed herself too much. She looked over to where Ushijima was standing, while he was in a much better state, his breathing was slightly agitated. But what struck her the most was the look on his face: a sly smile and excited eyes. He was pleased.

“There’s a drinking fountain over there,” he pointed out.

After a few more seconds of recovery, when Hanako was sure her legs wouldn’t fall off, she walked towards it. The water was fresh and savory, it helped ease her burning lungs. She wiped her mouth with the sleeve of her sweatshirt and stepped aside so that Ushijima could drink. Because of his height, he had to hunch to reach the fountain. When he finished, he took out a handkerchief from his pocket to dry his mouth and face, then neatly folded it to put it back.

“You never ran that fast in practice,” he didn’t look at her as he spoke, instead opting to appreciate the view. Or maybe he was just lost in thought, Hanako couldn’t tell. Either way, his expression had softened. She couldn’t remember ever seeing him like this, he seemed at peace. When he looked at her, she felt like she’d been caught seeing something she wasn’t supposed to see. She turned around, feeling her face go red. “You don’t like losing,” he said after a moment of silence.

“You thought I did?”

“I didn’t think you cared.” She looked at him confused, so he continued, “It would make sense if you stopped competing because you don’t enjoy it”.

Hanako sighed, “You can’t let that go, can you?” She started stretching and he followed. “Sorry, I don’t have an answer for you other than I just don’t want to do it anymore.”

They remained silent for a few minutes while they finished stretching. After she was done, Hanako finally had the chance to take in the view. The city was still asleep, it was quiet and the lack of movement made it seem like a painting. The sun peered behind the mountains. A gentle breeze caressed her face and she was thankful she’d put on long tights and a sweatshirt. It was earlier than she’d hoped. She took her cellphone out to look at the hour. It was barely past 7 a.m. She sighed loudly.

“What?”

“I was hoping to have breakfast after the run, there’s a new coffee shop down the road. But it doesn’t open for another hour…” Hanako shrugged, “Next Sunday, I guess.”

She was about to walked back to the school when he spoke, “I know a place.”

“When you said you knew a place, I assumed you meant one that was open.”

They were at the door of a coffee shop, the blinds were shut and there was a sign at the door that detailed the opening hour at 8.30. Ushijima ignored her and knocked anyway. After a minute, the blind open slightly leaving enough space for an eye to peer through it. As soon as it appeared, it was gone. They heard a couple of clicks from the inside and the door opened. An old lady with big glasses and an even bigger smile was greeting them.

“Wakatoshi, I wasn’t expecting you so early,” she turned to look at Hanako, “And you brought a friend. Come, come.” The old lady stepped aside leaving room for them to walk in and Ushijima gestured for her to go first. Once inside, the elderly woman escorted them to a table next to a window and open the blinds to let the sunlight in. When she was done, she gave Hanako a good look. “Mai Yu,” she introduced herself, “And what’s you name, honey?”

“Nakamura Hanako, nice to meet you,” she bowed.

“Very polite,” the old lady noted, “And she’s pretty too, is she your girlfriend?”

“No, she’s a classmate,” Ushijima explained with a blank expression while the girl grew red from the insinuation.

“That’s a shame,” she turned to Hanako, “You know, he’s a real catch. Last winter he helped us fix the ceiling,” as she talked, she handed them a couple of menus, “And I heard he’s a big volleyball star at school.”

“Really? I had no idea.”

Before Ushijima could correct her, the Mai spoke again, “Pick anything you want, it’s on the house.” 

“That’s not necessary,” he said. But the woman was halfway gone already.

Once they were alone, Hanako stared at him, awaiting an explanation, but none came. “So, who’s the old lady?”

“The owner.”

“I mean who is she to you?” Ushijima looked at her confused, “How do you know her?”

His frown relaxed, “I’ve been coming here since I was a kid.”

“And…”

“And what?”

“You fix her ceiling, she lets you come even when it’s not open. That seems like a close relationship.”

Ushijima pondered her words for a moment, as if just noticing what the girl pointed out. “I guess so.” Hanako narrowed her eyes, “What?”

“That’s a non-answer. It tells me nothing about why you’re close.”

“It’s the truth. She knows me since I’m little and now I help her whenever I can,” he explained, matter-of-factly.

“She seems fond of you, and proud.”

Hanako waited for a response or some sort of reaction, but Ushijima just stared at the menu, deep in thought, an excessive amount of focus being put into the task. They hadn’t known each other for long, but she noticed that he appeared to need an abnormal amount of effort for mostly everything that didn’t involve volleyball. She glanced over the pastry section, assuming her conversation with the ace was over.

“I never thought of it that way, but I suppose you are correct.”

The old lady came back and took their orders. Hanako asked for pancakes and a coffee, Ushijima just nodded when the lady asked if he wanted the usual.

“So, what are you two doing together?” Mai asked, suggestively.  

“We were running.”

“He never brings anyone with him,” now she was addressing Hanako, “You must be special,” she emphasized her insinuation with a wink.

“She also plays volleyball and she won the Spring Tournament,” he explained oblivious to what Mai was actually implying.

Hanako looked at the ace genuinely surprised, she hadn’t told him which tournament she’d won, nor had she spoken about it with Tendo. It could only mean he’d searched for that information on his own. She wondered what else he had learned.

The old lady hummed in agreement, “Providence,” was all she said before leaving them alone.

She looked around the place, all the walls were crowded with photos and porcelain plates hung as ornaments. Despite the amount, it was oddly balanced. Any more would be overwhelming, any less would feel empty. The rest of the place followed a similar vintage decoration and it gave her the sense that it was stuck in time. It felt organic, she assumed that was the way it always looked and not some borrowed nostalgia design to attract customers.

“It’s nice,” she said appreciatively to no one in particular. “Did you come here with your parents?”

 “Only with my dad.”

“How come?”

“After my parents divorced, we used to go to a nearby park and play volleyball together. We came here afterwards.”

 “Are you and your dad close?”

“I play volley because of him.”

She refrained from saying that wasn’t what she’d asked. With how much he cared about the sport, it might be all that matters to him. “I used to play with my dad as well.”

“Was he a setter too?”

“Not at all, he was a wing spiker like you. He tried to teach me, but I always found it funnier to set for him,” a faint smile appeared on her face while she spoke, she looked out the window spacing out. “He used to lie saying that he always knew I’d be a setter because I’m too impatient to just wait for the ball to come to me. Truth is he tried tirelessly to convince me I’d enjoy more playing as a spiker.”

It was a long time since she’d thought about that, it felt like a lifetime ago. So much has happened since. She took her eyes off the window, not wanting to follow the path down memory lane, and looked at the ace to find him staring back at her. He had that soft look on his face, frown completely gone and a warm smile. The sun coming from outside made his eyes glisten and he actually looked like a seventeen-year-old boy. Hanako looked down, avoiding his gaze as the blush crept into her face. Her hands were spread over the wooden table, and she started tapping her fingers against it, a telltale of her nervousness. She was more than grateful when Mai came with their food.

While Hanako had gone for pancakes topped with every option on the menu —cream, caramel, chocolate sauce, strawberries— and a coffee, Ushijima had ordered a bowl of Hayashi rice and green tea. They ate in silence. The pancakes were fluffy and the coffee the perfect temperature, Hanako hummed happily after finishing.

“You eat a lot for such a small person,” Ushijima pointed out. Unlike Hanako, who devoured her plate, he ate slowly and still had half a bowl to get through.

 “That’s not a nice thing to say,” she stared blankly at him, “And I’m not small, my height is above average. It’s not my fault you’re Goliat.”

“I didn’t mean to insult you, I just found it odd.”

“Please, stop.”

He gazed at her scowling but said nothing. He finished his plate while Hanako stared out the window.

Without saying a word, he stood up and headed for the counter where the old lady was. They exchanged a few words, none of which Hanako could hear, and he went back to the table. “We can leave now,” he stated and walked to the door. Hanako followed him, not without thanking Mai and waving goodbye to her.

As they were walking back to the school, they remained silent. There were more people on the streets now, but it was still fairly quiet. She looked around absentmindedly. Despite spending most holidays in Miyagi, she wasn’t all that familiar with the place. So, why had she come here? What was she expecting to find? On the surface, the answer was easy, she needed out of Tokyo. She’d hope that if she put enough distance, then her aching would ease and she would see things more clearly.

But the change in scenery did little to soothe her sorrow.  Her wounds were no longer out in the open for the world to see and she could get by most days without thinking about them, but she still woke up in the middle of the night with a cold sweat and tears prickling her eyes.

A strong grip on her arm brought her back to reality. There were no incoming cars, but the traffic light was still red for them.

“Thank you,” she said grudgingly.

Ushijima looked as if he wanted to say something but thought better of it. They resumed walking when the light switched back to green. Hanako took the chance to examine the ace from the corner of her eye. A scowl was still present on his face and she wondered what he had to sulk about? They were entering the school campus when she realized.

“Sorry, I forgot to pay you for breakfast.”

He stopped to look at her for a few seconds, his frown deepened, and he resumed walking without saying a word. If he wasn’t sulking before, he definitely was now. Hanako was left dumbfounded and when she snapped back, she had to jog to catch him. “Hey,” she called out to make him stop, but he ignored her. She sped up and stood in front of him. He came to a halt then.

“What?” He barked at her.

“Here,” Hanako took out a bunch of money from her pocket and spread her hand for him to take it. Ushijima tried to step aside to leave without grabbing it, but she blocked him and pressed the money against his chest, “Take it.”

“I’m not fighting with a girl,” he backed away but Hanako close the distance again, this time Ushijima grabbed her forearm so that she couldn’t stamp the money against him.

“Then take the money and there’ll be no need to.”

“You’re being a child.”

“Well, takes one to know one.” She was on her tiptoes, glaring at him.

Before he could snarl back at her, a loud nasal voice interrupted them. “Toshi!” Hanako’s attention shifted to a girl running towards them. She recognized her from class, it was one of the school’s cheerleaders. As the girl approached them, Hanako noticed she was wearing an impossible tight ponytail that gave her a headache just by looking at it. When she was next to them, the wide smile she was wearing dropped, her eyes focused on Ushijima’s hand holding Hanako. “Sorry, I didn’t see you there. Am I interrupting something?”

Hanako stepped away from the ace. “Not at all.”

“Good,” the cheerleader said with the fakest of smiles. “Toshi, I was thinking of going out for breakfast, would you like to join me?”

“Toshi?” Hanako was stifling a laugh.

Ushijima grunted and ignored her, “We already had breakfast.”

“We?” The cheerleader repeated, and Hanako’s was certain she saw one of her eyes twitch. “And you are?”

“We go to class together.”

“Right, the new girl. I almost didn’t recognize you without the frizzy mane you call hair.”

Hanako laughed dryly. “Well, we can’t all be blessed with boring straight hair, can we?” She saved the money back in her pocket, giving up on paying Ushijima. Her mood was officially ruined. “I’ll leave you to it. Goodbye, Toshi,” she said mockingly.

 Last thing she saw before leaving was that deep frown on his face.  

Chapter Text

It was yet another sleepless night. Hanako had hoped the run with Ushijima from the day before would’ve been enough to knock her out, it wasn’t. Just when she was about to fall asleep, the alarm rang. She went through her morning routine unwillingly, spacing out on her way to the classroom. For once, she was coming in early.

She was just a few steps in when she tripped with something and fell. Hanako barely got to put her hands in front of her to prevent her face from hitting the floor. A hand stretched in front of her to help her up. “Are you okay?” Semi asked as she rose, seemingly concerned. “Yeah, no worries,” she looked back to see what she’d stumbled with, only to find the same tight ass ponytail and smile from the day before. Phony cheerleader was staring back at her, she was sat on the first desk in the row and leaned as she spoke, “Oh my, I’m so sorry I didn’t see you walking by. I was just trying to stretch off the sleepiness.”  

“Right,” Hanako pondered whether to say something to wipe the triumph off her face, but her head was hurting from staring at the cheerleader’s hair and her left wrist was throbbing from the fall. She ignored the other girl and turned to Semi instead, “Thanks.”

The boy was staring at the other girl as well, scowling. His features softened when he heard Hanako, “No problem,” he said smiling. They walked together to the back end of the classroom, Tendo and Ushijima were already there. Hanako waved at them slightly and murmured “Morning” when she was within earshot distance. When her eyes met Ushijima’s, he looked away instantly, glueing them to the blank notebook on his desk. Hanako dismissed it as just another instance of his lack of social skills, but it perked the interest of Tendo who made a mental note to press him about it later.

“Hana-Nana, were you testing the quality of the floor?” The redhead teased her.

“I was making sure it could stand you and your jokes.”

“And what’s the verdict?”

“Your jokes are safe for now,” they looked at each other with squinted eyes before bursting out laughing. Both Semi and Ushijima stared at them confused, they seemed to be speaking a language the rest couldn’t understand no matter how much attention they paid.

“Hana-Nana?” The girl questioned with a raised brow.

“Has a nice ring to it,” Tendo shrugged.

Hanako laughed to herself, “I guess so.”

Throughout the first class, she couldn’t help to doze off, her mind fixed on the increasing pain in her wrist. Before she realized, History was over and Miss Trunchbull was walking around the classroom delivering the tests from last week. When she was nearing Hanako’s desk, the girl straightened up, fearing yet another reprimand.

The teacher gave the test another look before handing it to her, “Unbelievable.” Hanako grabbed it and saw she’d gotten a perfect score. It wasn’t a surprise to her, she’d always loved math, but clearly Miss Trunchbull was expecting her to fail. She smiled with pride realizing she’d proved her wrong. The woman smirked, almost complacently, but said nothing as she walked past her.

“Same old,” she said while handing Ushijima his test. The ace gave no response. Hanako turned around slightly to look over her shoulder, it was obvious by the teacher’s tone that he’d failed, yet he seemed unfazed by it. He folded the exam neatly and saved it inside his notebook. Hanako looked away.

When the class was over, Miss Trunchbull asked her to stay. Once the rest of the students had cleared the classroom to go for lunch, the woman spoke, “Some of the questions were supposed to go unanswered.”

“Next time you should try leaving them out of the test then.”

“Funny,” she looked at Hanako from above her glasses. “I could transfer you to an advanced class, you have the level for it. Although, we don’t usually recommend it to the students who have other activities,” she paused for a second. “Like volleyball, for instance.”

“I don’t play anymore.”

“So I’ve been told. I’ve also heard you’re assisting the men’s team.”

“Assisting is a bit of an overstatement.”

“Yet, when I asked why you’d been placed in classes below your level, Washijo told me you wouldn’t have the time for anything other than volleyball,” her piercing eyes seemed to look right through the girl, Hanako moved uncomfortably under her stare. “Have you giving any thought to what you want to do?”

“With what?”

“With yourself, Miss Nakamura. If you’re interested, the advanced classes would be a good idea. But if your distance from volleyball is only temporary then I’m inclined to agree with Washijo. I’m not saying you must choose right now, but you should think about it.”

It was hard to tell whether Hanako had taken offense in her words, she stared out the window silently, replaying her teacher’s advice in her head. She hadn’t thought about any of it and realizing that made her feel ashamed. With her thumb she massaged over her sore wrist, the pain anchoring her to the reality she so desperately wanted to run away from. “Thank you,” she said earnestly and bowed before leaving the classroom.

For the rest of the day, Hanako hadn’t spoken a word. She’d spent lunch absentmindedly playing with the food on her plate rather than eating it, and during the remaining classes she barely took any notes. The change didn’t go unnoticed to her friends, but no one dared say anything. It wasn’t until the end of school day when Tendo was walking her to the dorm that he finally managed to address the issue, “Did Miss Yamagawa eat your tongue?” Tendo asked jokingly, although his voice came out soft, giving away his concern.

Hanako came to a halt upon hearing him, “Do you have plans after school?”

“Well, there’s practice and then homework.”

“No, I mean,” she stopped, unsure of how to explain herself. It was dumb and borderline narcissistic, but she had the feeling that her worries were unique to her and, therefore, impossible to understand or garner sympathy from others. Yet, she felt that if there was any chance of being heard, it was probably with Tendo. “Next year, when we’re done with school, do you know what you’ll do then?”

The boy grabbed his chin adopting a thoughtful stance, “Mmm, I’m not sure. I guess I’ll know when the time comes.” 

“And you’re okay with that?”

“I’ve always done whatever feels right,” he shrugged as if it wasn’t a big deal and resumed walking, Hanako followed. “Why are you asking?”

“I wanted to be a volleyball player growing up, now I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. Miss Yamagawa asked me about it.”

  “So, you had an identity crisis and decided to stop talking altogether?”

Hanako laughed, “When you put it like that it sounds kinda childish.”

“Sorry, I wanted it to sound really childish. My bad.”

She pushed him slightly, “Shut up. I’m not telling you anything ever again.”

“That’s even more childish,” he pointed out. They walked in silence for a while, Tendo looked at her from the corner of his eye, her eyes were fixed on the sidewalk and she was holding tightly to her backpack. He waited for her to say something else but when no word came, he continued, “I don’t think we have to know right now or next year, for that matter. The idea that you have to choose at 17 what you want to do with your life only made sense when the life expectancy was 50, and even then it was a bit ridiculous.”

“What do you propose we do instead?” Hanko asked, but he simply shrugged in response. She laughed and pushed him again, “I can’t sit on my ass all day waiting for a gut feeling to tell me what I want to do with my life.”

“I didn’t say that. I’m just saying there’s nothing wrong with not knowing. You can try new things if you think that’s going to help. Or you can just wait until you realize what you want.”

“That sounds like a lot of time wasted.”

“You’re 17, you can afford it.”

“For how long?”

“Now you’re just fishing for worries. Why are you in such a rush anyway?”

Because I’m scared, she thought but said nothing. Tendo saw the trouble in her eyes. “I wish I could be more like you.”

He looked at her intrigued, “That might be the first time anyone has said that.”

“I mean it,” she was about to explain how she felt she once was like that and that it had gotten lost somewhere along the road. There was also the urge to tell him about the exact moment that fearlessness washed away from her, but she couldn’t find the right words. “I’m not good at waiting, especially if I don’t know what I’m waiting for.”

When they reached the dorms, they both stood there in silence for a few seconds. Tendo was looking up at the sky with his hands in his pockets, he sighed, “I didn’t have a real friend until a joined the volleyball team here, that used to keep me up when I was little. I guess I just had to grow indifferent to it, that’s sort of life. But when I started here and, for some reason, the team’s shinning star thought I was worth spending time with, I remembered those nights. He’s a better friend than I could ever ask for, he’s also not what I would’ve asked for,” they both laughed. “What I’m saying is some things are worth waiting for, even if you don’t know you’re waiting for them at all.”

She found herself genuinely smiling at that.

During warmup, Tendo decided to try and keep up with Ushijima. It must’ve been the talk earlier with Hanako that prompted that reckless decision, but he felt the need to be closer to his friend that afternoon. He was grateful that Ushijima had taken pity on him and slowed his pace. Around the tenth lap, Tendo noticed his friend kept looking over at the gym door. Even when they were done warming up, the smallest noise made his eyes shoot in that direction. It wasn’t until Shirabu started to deliver the practice jerseys that he realized why.

He didn’t have to wait long to find the ace glancing at the door again, “Wakatoshi,” he spoke with his usual singsong voice, “Are you looking for someone?” Tendo moved his brow suggestively. Ushijima seemed confused but didn’t get the chance to say anything because the coach started giving out directions for the exercise.

They were in the middle of an intense rally when the gym door opened. Because of the rotation, Tendo was on the bench, so he saw Hanako walk in without worrying about the game. Immediately, his eyes shot towards Ushijima. One, two, three, four. Four seconds he stood watching her. On the fifth he came back on himself to do a very poor receive, he managed to dig the ball but the effect made it bounce in an odd direction, away from his teammates. 

Had it been any other player, Washijo would have erupted into angry screaming, but since it was Ushijima, the old man simply cursed under his breath and signaled for a change so that the ace could take a break. As his friend was walking towards the bench, the coach said something to him which Tendo couldn’t hear, but it was enough to send Ushijima into a foul mood.

The ace sat on the bench and took a water bottle and a towel. He drank and dried his face with harsh motions, almost as if he was punishing himself for the small mistake he’d made. While he was busy with that, Hanako approached Washijo with a note and a cheerful smile which was wiped away from her face as soon as she heard the old man’s response. She walked to where Tendo was and sighed, “Not even a sprained wrist can get him off my back.”

Ushijima sat up straight upon hearing her but barely dared to look in her direction for a split second before focusing back on the game. “What happened to you?” She asked, stranged to see him benched, “Are you sulking cause of that shitty receive, golden boy?”

He looked at her then, a long-lasting look that sent shivers down her spine. His frown almost reaching the floor as he spoke, “I told you not to call me that.”

Hanako moved uncomfortably and glanced at the game, not standing another second under his gaze, “Yeah, well, one of your fans sent me to the infirmary. I think I’ve earned the prerogative to call you whatever I want.”

Ushijima stared at her hand, bandaged with a wrist brace. “That’s not my fault.”

 “You’re guilty by association.” She left then to where the rest of the substitutes were standing.

Tendo was looking at the ace to see his reaction, but he didn’t give anything away. His eyes, however, had followed Hanako and stayed trained on her for a few seconds while she watched the match. “When did you ask her not to call you golden boy?”

“Yesterday.” Ushijima’s attention shifted back to the game.

“Yesterday, as in Sunday?” The redhead looked at his friend with squinted eyes. “When did you see her?”

“During my morning run.”

“So, you ran into her and stopped to asked her not to call you that?”

“No, we were running.”

“What?!” Tendo’s yell made some of the substitutes and Washijo turn. The old man gave him a nasty look, “You two come here.” For the rest of the match, Ushijima stayed on the field and his friend didn’t get the chance to ask him more about Hanako.

Unsurprisingly, the ace team won every practice match. When they were done, the girl went around the gym drying the sweat from the floor with a mop she maneuvered with some difficulty using her right hand. The coach had taken no pity on her and deemed any help from the boys unnecessary, although he knew that as soon as he stepped out of the gym, they would all run to her aid.

Once Washijo left, the first one to go with Hanako was their captain. Kaito assured her they would take care of cleaning and pushed her out while urging her to rest and take care of her wrist. It only took a few minutes for them to finish and leave the gym, even Ushijima. When questioned about it by his surprised captain, he explained he had math homework he needed to work on. The explanation was convincing enough for Kaito, but not for his best friend. Ushijima would rather fail a test than lose a minute of practice over math, why was he lying?

At the dorms, after having dinner and a shower, Tendo went to his friend’s room. Unlike most students, Ushijima didn’t share the place with anyone else. His last roommate had left after the second week of being awoken by the ace’s alarm at 5 a.m. He was the third person to runaway, so the school had given up on finding him a roommate. When he opened the door, he looked at Tendo confused. “Did something happen?”

“Nope, just seeing if you needed help with math,” the redhead said as he walked into the room. Right away, he noticed the laptop was open on the desk with a volleyball match on and laughed, “I guess not.”

“You can stay to watch the game if you want.”

“Sure,” They sat on the bed, Tendo with his back against the wall and Ushijima leaned forward on the edge. It was an old match of Japan’s national team at the Olympics. “Why didn’t you stay after practice today?” The ace didn’t turn but Tendo could tell he was frowning. “Clearly, it wasn’t to do homework.”

“I was unfocused, it made no sense to practice like that.”

“Why were you unfocused?”  

He remained silent, eyes fixed on the screen but not really looking, “I don’t know,” he admitted. There was something odd in the way he said it, a mixture of tiredness and frustration in his voice. Tendo couldn’t recall ever hearing him like that.  “Do you think I’m treated differently because I’m the star of the team?”

“Did Hanako say that?”

“Yes.”

 “And does it bother you that people might treat you differently or that she thinks that?”

“What’s the difference?”

“Well, either you care about what everyone thinks of you and how that makes them treat you, or you care about what Hanako thinks and how she treats you in response.”

“That doesn't make any sense.” 

“I think is the later,” Tendo continued paying no mind to what Ushijima just said. “And that confuses you because you’re not used to talking to girls and caring about what they think.”

“I talk with girls.”

“Only to ask for permission if they are in your way, which they generally are because they want you to notice them, but you don’t.” Ushijima wanted to complain but his friend was right.

For a time, they remained silent watching the game. When it was over, Tendo stood up and stretched, moving his arms up with his hand clapped together and arching his back slightly, making him look like a bow. “I think you should try and get to know her, might shake some of that confusion off.” Ushijima hummed in response, more out of politeness than actual consideration of his friend’s advice. Tendo went for the door and pause before leaving, “You might want to ask her for help at math while you’re on it.”

Chapter Text

For the following days, nothing changed. Ushijima kept on ignoring Hanako, hoping it would ease the odd feeling on the pit of his stomach whenever he saw her. It was hard to pinpoint exactly what that feeling was. Annoyance, perhaps. Definitely confusion. But it ran deeper than that and he wasn’t sure why. He only knew that whatever the feeling was, it was unpleasant. He ignored Tendo’s advice. If he ever felt like listening to it, all it took to put him off was remembering how all his previous conversations with Hanako had gone. Those he wasn’t sure could be label as unpleasant, but they weren’t something he wanted to get used to nor explore.

Yet, as he got ready to go on his Sunday morning run, he found himself wondering if he was going to see her again. It wasn’t until he ran into her once more that he realized there was a hint of excitement in that wondering. He followed her close behind, unsure of whether it was okay to join her. The girl’s attitude towards his presence seemed to sway between annoyance and acceptance without any particular reason. Two minutes, three minutes, seven minutes went by with him running after her at a slower pace than he would have set for himself. Before he had time to question that, Hanako came to a halt in the middle of the block and turned to face him.

“Are you following me?” She was frowning. Her breath was agitated, little drops of sweat falling down her frame. “Yes,” he said simply. Her eyes opened wide in surprise, trying to decide if she was more shocked at the fact he was following her or because of his honesty, “Well, stop. It’s creepy,” but she didn’t turn to leave. “May I join you?” The question came out of nowhere and, as soon as he said it, Ushijima regretted it. Even if she said yes, which was unlikely, she was only going to slow him down.

“How much is left of your circuit?” Hanako’s voice brought him back to reality.

“Two and a half kilometers.”

She considered it for a few seconds before answering, “We are not doing a race like last time and we’re running at a reasonable pace for the two, none of that superhuman speed you have.”

Ushijima smirked at the last remark, “Sure.”

They stopped at the front of the school gates, Hanako bent down with her hands pressed against her knees and took a deep breath. The run had been longer than last weekend, but Ushijima kept his word and followed her pace. Still, by the end she was worn out. She straightened up to find the ace looking at her, he was drenched in sweat as well, but much more composed than her.

“Are you hungry?”

Before she could answer, her stomach growled, “Yeah, I was planning on having breakfast nearby.” Ushijima stared at her without saying a word, his lips pursed slightly. “Do you… want to come?”

“If it’s not too much trouble.”

“As long as you let me pay this time, sure.”

He looked away, his lips pressed in a fine line giving away his discontent, “Fine.”

“Great, I’ll race you there,” she bolted without waiting for an answer.

Their plates came shortly after they ordered. Hanako had an egg sandwich out of recommendation from the waiter, but Ushijima stuck to his rice bowl. This time the coffee shop was already open when they arrived, the old lady greeted them from behind the kitchen door and went back inside to resume her labor. Besides her, there were two other employees, one behind the counter —the owner’s granddaughter, in charge of the register machine— and the other one a young man waiting and cleaning the tables.

Hanako hummed in appreciation while she took the first bite out of her sandwich, “Remind me to thank the waiter before we leave, this is delicious.” Ushijima simply nodded in response, “Have you tried it?”

“No, I prefer the rice.”

“How do you know what you prefer if you haven’t tried it?”

He stopped for a second to think about it and Hanako noted just how often he did that, like there were parts of the world he hadn’t paid attention to —not because he was closed to them but because he hadn’t bothered to. “I like the rice enough that I don’t have the need to try anything else.”

Hanako laughed, “Well, If I could eat the whole menu in one sitting I would.”

“That sounds unhealthy.”

“But your point is interesting. I don’t think I like anything so much that would make me resign everything else,” she took another bite, the eggs were creamy and seasoned just right —not too much salt, enough pepper and a pinch of something citric—, and spoke with her mouth still half full, “Although this comes close.” Ushijima stared at her for a few seconds, deep in thought. “Do I have something on my face?”

He looked away immediately, fixing his eyes on the rice bowl, “No.” He felt a subtle heat creeping up his face, but what surprised him the most was the need to keep looking at her, which he had to ignore. Hanako tried to catch his eyes to get a sense of what was going on inside his mind, as uncomfortable as it made her to be under his gaze she was more curious about the reason. “Then why were you staring?” She asked blankly.  

“Nothing,” he said, still not looking directly at her. Again the same unsettling feeling on the pit of his stomach, like the void you get when you go many hours without eating. He grabbed the napkin placed beside his plate and cleaned his mouth, “Excuse me,” he stood up and headed to the restroom.

Hanako followed him with her eyes until he disappeared into a hall, she took the final bite out of her sandwich and sipped her coffee. The door of the coffee shop opened when a little girl and her father walked in, Hanako saw as the girl chose a table by the window, “Here, dad!” The man followed with a smile and patted the top of his daughter’s head before sitting.

The scene made her smile for a second before she felt her heart crumpled and looked away. She put pressure on her chest with the tip of her fingers and massage, hoping it would ease the sudden tightness. Out of her pocket she took her cellphone and went straight to the phonebook, she scrolled down until she found the name she was looking for. Opening the contact information, she stared at it for a few seconds, debating whether to call or not. Hanako threw the phone back into her pocket and crossed her arms over her chest while she watched the street through the window, her mood growing sour by the minute. Again, she reached for her phone and did the same until her eyes were teary watching the contact’s name displayed on the screen. She locked it, this time leaving it screen down on the table. She gulped down the rest of her coffee, swallowing the lump in her throat.

Not long after, Ushijima sat back on the table and finished his breakfast in silence. She asked for the tab, paid and they went back to the school, not saying a word to each other. Hanako was trying to keep her head away from thinking about her last night in Tokyo and so she made a mental list of all the things she could do once she was alone in her bedroom, doubting it would be enough to distract her from the name on her contact list. Ushijima was looking at her from the corner of his eye, he’d noticed she had grown suddenly quiet and wondered if he had done something to offend her. He was never sure why, but he seemed to have that effect on people, although he didn’t realize until it was too late.

“Have I done something wrong?” They were walking past the front gates. Hanako snapped back to reality when she heard his voice and her face contorted with confusion, “You’re quiet,” he explained.

She laughed dryly, “I don’t annoy you for a few minutes and you think something’s wrong?”

“It’s been more than a few minutes.”

“Don’t worry, golden boy. I was just thinking of homework.” He stared at her, his brows knit together, not buying her explanation and unsure of why he even cared.

 “Is the homework hard?”

“Is the homew- we go to the same classes, what do you mean is the homework hard?” She repeated dumbfounded. He looked away, embarrassed, and Hanako felt bad for a moment. “I don’t think so, but I spent all of yesterday reading so I need to catch up,” she spoke in a kinder tone.

“I see.”

“What about you?”

His lips pursed into a tight line, “I didn’t know we had homework.”

Hanako had to stifle a laugh, “You’re not very fond of school, are you?”

“No.”

“If you need help…” The words came out of her mouth before she could stop them. He waited for her to continue, but she just left the words hanging. Come to think of it, it wasn’t the worst of ideas, having to explain functions to Ushijima would surely prove challenging enough to keep her mind occupied. “I’m free is what I’m trying to say.”

He remained silent, long enough that Hanako thought of withdrawing her offer, “I would appreciate it.”

Hanako was standing outside the boy’s dorm, waiting for Ushijima to come out. They were planning on going to the school library to study. She was lying with her back against the wall when she heard someone calling, to her right Semi and a boy she’d never seen before were approaching. “Are you lost again, Hana?” She rolled her eyes and took her hand to her chest, dramatically feigning offense. At this he laughed, then gestured to the other boy, “Hana, Tadashi. Tadashi, Hana.”

The boy waved at her, “Hi, Semi’s told me all about you,” he said mischievously looking at his friend. Semi elbowed his side annoyed, a subtle red creeping up his face.

“That shouldn’t have taken long, I’m afraid there’s not much to know.”

“Really? He comes up with something new every day.”

“What are you doing here, Hana?” Semi asked nervously, changing the subject.

“Oh…” She straightened up, separating from the wall and rearranging her backpack. For reasons unbeknownst to her, the idea of explaining to anyone that she was tutoring Ushijima made her uncomfortable.

“I’m ready to go,” the ace’s voice came from behind the boys, who turned in surprise. Semi looked from Ushijima to Hanako to Ushijima again, it took him only seconds to understand he was talking to her.

“We are going to the library, I’m helping him with homework,” she said hastily.

“Right,” Semi said, still staring at the ace with a frown. “We should get going. It was nice seeing you, Hanako,” he smiled at her, with some perceptible effort. “You too,” he addressed Ushijima, but this time he didn’t bother smiling.

After what seemed like a hundred hours, Hanako called it a day. They made some advances with English, but math proved to be too much for their first lesson. Ushijima apologized after noticing how worn out she was, but Hanako assured him it was no big deal. He walked her to the dorm with a silence none of them felt the need to fill.

When she got to class the next morning, she saw a protein bar on her desk. She had somehow managed to sleep through the night and woke up at a reasonable hour for breakfast, so she saved the bar for later. She picked it up and smiled lightly at Ushijima but the boy had his eyes fixed on his notebook, rereading the notes from yesterday. Hanako smiled to herself at that.

The teacher walked in and all the students went silent. Hanako teared a piece of paper from the corner of her notebook and scribbled a “thank you” in it. She folded it and passed it over her shoulder to Ushijima. When he grabbed it, his fingertips brushed her hand slightly. Hanako took her hand away, surprised by the touch, and ignored the tingling sensation.

During recess, Hanako left the classroom to get some orange juice from the vending machine. As soon as she was out of sight, Semi turned to Tendo, who had his head buried in a comic book. “Hey, can I ask you something?”

“You already are Semi Semi,” he spoke without taking his eyes away from the page he was reading, “But please, I would be happy to share my wisdom with you.”

The blonde rolled his eyes, but pushed aside his annoyance, “Has Hanako mention anything about a boyfriend?”

This perked his attention, he looked up and raised an eyebrow, “Semi Semi, are you finally going to ask her out?”

His whole face went red, “That’s not why I’m asking,” he gave Ushijima a glance and noticed him listening to their conversation, “She has a picture with a guy in her locker, I was just wondering…”

“Right, you’re just curious,” Tendo said sarcastically, “Well, if she has one, she hasn’t mention him to me, but it’s not like we talk much about things like that.”

Semi thanked him and turned around. A few minutes later, Hanako came back and sat in her place. 

 “Hana Nana,” Tendo called out to her, “Is there a boy crying himself to sleep every night in Tokyo?”

Her face screwed in confusion “A what now?”

“You know, because he misses you so much,” he had his elbows on the desk, with his hands intertwined and his chin resting on his knuckles. “I mean a boyfriend.”

Hanako straightened up and looked away from Tendo, “Nope.”

The bell rang and Miss Yamagawa marched in like clockwork, leaving Tendo no room to ask more questions.

At lunchtime, Hanako decided to grab a sandwich and eat outside. She sat under the tree that provided the most shadow, placed a napkin neatly on her lap and began eating. A cold breeze ruffled her hair and she had to tie it up so it wouldn’t bother her. When she was done with the food, she took out her phone and scrolled down her messages. Bokuto had sent her over ten memes and pictures of animals he either find amusing or cute, she replied with many laughing emojis and thumbs up, knowing that would please her best friend. She answered some texts from her former teammates, assuring them she was fine and avoiding any mention of her quitting.

But there was one chat she couldn’t bring herself to open. Instead, she clicked on the profile picture and stared at it for a little too long. She’d taken it a couple of years ago, during the first match she watched of Fukurodani Academy. The original photo featured all the team, but the one she was looking at was a cropped version with only one of the boys. She smiled to herself, noticing how young he look, it was nothing like she remembered from the last time she’d seen him, a few months ago. She had berating him on many occasions before, telling him it was time for an update on the picture, “If you’d let me use one of ours…” was his usual reply.

“Sure, as long as you crop me out.”

“But then the best part of the picture would be gone.”

No matter how many times he openly flirted with her, she would always blush, “Stop, you’re being corny again.”

She throwed the phone into her backpack, pushing the memory aside. With her eyes closed, she focused on the breeze, the grass under her and her breathing. She swallowed the lump in her throat, picked up her bag and went back to class.

Chapter Text

After school on Wednesday, she went to the library looking for a book for her history assignment. She was walking by one of the gyms when a volleyball came bouncing in her way, so she stopped to pick it up before it could go any further. In no time a girl was standing in front of her, apologetic as Hanako handed her the ball and assured her there was no problem. The girl thanked her and hurried back inside. Hanako should have resumed her way, instead she stayed there looking at the gym door and listening to the echo from the bouncing balls and the squeaky shoes.

Almost timidly, she walked towards the entry and leaned in, holding the door frame, to peek inside. She recognized the girl from her class that had approached her on her first day­­ —Shiori, was it? — and some other girls from passing them on the hallways. But she couldn’t remember them from the match they played at the Spring tournament. She held onto the doorframe harder, the realization feeling bitter in her mouth.

“You can take a closer look if you’d like,” the Coach’s voice brought her back to reality. Before she had time to think better of it, her legs were carrying her to the side of the field, next to the woman that called her. She looked like she was in her thirties and was wearing the Shiratorizawa uniform with her last name, Yamatoya, embroidered on her left. “What happened to your hand?”

Hanako lifted her left hand, still covered with a wrist brace, “It’s nothing, just a sprained wrist. I have to wear this for a couple weeks more.”

“You should be careful, wrists can be tricky.”

Hanako nodded slightly, unsure of what else to say. Her attention shifted to the game developing in front of her. She noticed almost immediately that neither team had a particularly good setter. One team, the one where Shiori was playing, had a first year that seemed like she was ready to cry if she made any mistake. The rest of the players did their best to reassure her after every point, regardless of the outcome, but that didn’t stop her sets from growing weaker and uncertain. The other team’ setter was around 2 meters tall and clearly used to play as a central blocker. Hanako couldn’t remember the setter she had played against at the tournament, still she was sure it was nowhere to be found.

“What happened to your setter?”

“ACL injury.”

Hanako looked back at the woman, there was a deep frown on her face and her lips were tightly shut in a fine line, “That’s a bad one.” ACL injuries require surgery and put a player out for months in the best cases, a year if you’re really unlucky.

“Worse than a sprained wrist, for sure.”

The young girl gave Shiori a set that was too high and too fast, causing her to hit the ball with her non-dominant hand. The spike was easy for the other team to dig for a counterattack, which ended with a point for them. The girl bowed and apologized to her teammates for the poor set, but this time Shiori was too annoyed to act like it didn’t bother her that she had to juggle in order to manage a decent spike, and so she let the rest handle the girl’s lack of confidence.

“That’s enough for today, ladies. Hydrate, stretch and pick everything up. Good job, everybody!”

The girls thanked her and went to do as they were told. Most of them also took the time to stop by the young setter with words of encouragement and pats on the back, even Shiori left her annoyance aside to talk to her. Hanako couldn’t hear what she told the girl, but her words had been the only ones to wipe the pout off her face. The scene reminded her of her former teammates, but then she guessed all teams must be the same. Yet, her chest tightened at the memory, and she decided it was enough for today as well.

Hanako was about to say goodbye to the coach when she interrupted her, “Let me walk you out.” Despite knowing where this was headed, she didn’t oppose her. Once the were outside of the gym, she spoke, “So, what do you think?”

“It was a good practice.”

The coach laughed, “No, it wasn’t. But we’re also not as bad as it looks. Our captain was feeling under the weather today, the new girls get a little disorganized when she’s not around. Still, it’s not the same team that made it to Nationals.”

“I hardly noticed,” Hanako wasn’t lying, she couldn’t remember her match against Shiratorizawa, although it was clear that the team’s performance was nowhere near what was needed to reach Nationals.

Coach Yamatoya laughed dryly, thinking Hanako was being sarcastic. “Washijo insists you just need some time off and that you’re going to join us eventually,” she waited for a response, but when none came, she continued, “I’m sorry about y-”

“That’s not necessary,” Hanako snapped, not wanting to hear any of it.

“I believe it is. Your father and I were friends during our years here, then we fell out of touch… Anyway, I wanted to say something when we met at Nationals, but didn’t get the chance,” she explained apologetically, “How is he doing?”

“If you’re not close enough to ask him yourself, I don’t think I should tell you,” Hanako was getting defensive, she had no idea how her father was and didn’t want to know, although she imagined a really clear and nasty picture.

“I suppose you’re right,” they stared at each other silently for a few seconds and Hanako recognize the look on the coach’s face easily. She’d seen it many times before moving to Miyagi, pity. She hated being pitied. “Is it okay if I ask how you’re doing?”

“I’m fine,” she said, looking almost defiant, “Really.”  

The coach nodded slightly, not buying the tough act. “Well, if you ever find yourself not so fine, my door is always open. And you’re always welcome here,” she pointed to the gym, “Even if it’s just to watch.”

Not wanting to be alone with her thoughts after the talk with Coach Yamatoya, Hanako went to her room to get change and headed straight to the other gym, where the boys’ volleyball club trained. It was still an hour till their practice started, so of course the only one there was Ushijima. When she walked into the gym, he was tightening the net. He frowned upon seeing her but said nothing. Hanako left her backpack on the side and went to one of the ends of the court, where Ushijima had left the balls. She leaned with her forearms against the cart and grabbed a ball with her right hand. Once the boy was walking towards her, she passed it to him. He caught it with ease and got ready to serve.

He walked past her, putting enough distance between him and the end of the court, stopped and bounced the ball a few times. Took a deep breath and threw the ball up. He ran and used the impulse to jump and hit it in the air. Hanako’s breath caught in her throat when she heard the impact, the ball went flying to the other side of the gym with an unbelievable speed and strength, falling right on the edge of the court. It was like lighting had stroke and it reminded her of the first time she saw the boy training. He turned around like it was nothing, as if it had mustered no special effort from him to serve that way and put his hands up in front of his chest, signaling Hanako to pass him another ball, which she did once she snapped out of the trance.

They spent the next half hour doing the same thing over and over again, until there were no balls left on the cart, and they were forced to stop and switch sides. Ushijima took the opportunity to drink water and recover a little, he was now sweating and breathing with perceptible effort. Good, she thought, so he’s human after all. Hanako began picking up the balls and he joined her not long after. She grabbed the balls with her right hand and piled up as many as she could against her body, using her left hand for support. Ushijima walked up to her, “You shouldn’t do that,” he took some of the balls away from her, easing the effort she was doing with her injured hand.

“I don’t mind,” Hanako tried picking up another ball, but he went ahead and grabbed it himself. She sighed, realizing there was no point in fighting him. She left everything on the cart and pushed it next to Ushijima, so he could do the same. She followed him around until there were no balls left on the floor and went to the end of the court to resume training.

Hanako took a ball out of the cart and was ready to throw it at him, except Ushijima was standing next to her, “You’re not usually here this early,” he pointed out. “Did Washijo ask you to come?”

“No, I just had some free time,” she shrugged and extended the ball to him, “But if you’d rather train alone, I can leave.”

“I don’t mind having you here,” he said as he took the ball off her hand, “You’re helpful when you’re not fooling around with Tendo or Semi.” He turned around and went on with his serve, completely oblivious to the shock in Hanako’s face. It was only when he faced her again that he noticed it and frowned, confused. “Is there something wrong?”

“I don’t fool around.”

“What would you call it?”

“Having fun with my friends? But I can see how that’s a foreign concept for you.”

“I have fun,” he approached her to try and take a ball, but Hanako moved the cart at the last second to stop him, which made his frown deepened.

“Really?” She asked mockingly, “How exactly do you have fun? And volleyball doesn’t count, you take it as seriously as a snake bite.”

“I have fun racing you,” he said nonchalantly, taking Hanako by surprise and making her feel almost ashamed that she had taunt him in the first place. Not that any of that matter to him, he simply picked up a ball and went on with his practice while Hanako stood there dumbfounded.  

Come to think of it, Hanako had fun with him as well. Of course, not in the traditional sense, but she did find his competitive nature rather entertaining and, at least most of the time, his presence wasn’t all that annoying. “I have fun with you too,” the words came out of her mouth before she could stop them.

Ushijima had thrown the ball up and was jumping when he heard her, and the distraction caused him to miss. The ball fell and bounced away from him. There it was: that odd feeling at the pit of his stomach again. He pushed it aside, ignoring what Hanako said, and went for another ball. Again, he threw it up, ran and hit it right in the middle. It went flying to the other side of the gym and out the court. He huffed, annoyed.

When he turned to pick another ball, Hanako had already passed him one. Actually, she had thrown it at him —hard— and had it not been for his acute reflexes, it would’ve hit him straight in the face. There was something off about her, but he couldn't put a finger on it. “If you’re feeling unwell, you should leave.”  

“Am I not helpful enough?” She asked harshly and Ushijima was shocked when he noticed she was mad.

“You’re not.”

She gave a brittle laugh and for a time neither of them spoke. Instead, they continued with the same routine as before until coach Washijo and some teammates arrived. In no time, practice started and Hanako went to the sideline.

“Hanako, wait!” Semi called out as he ran out of the gym. She waited for him to catch up, “Mind if I join you?”

“Sure.”

They walked in an awkward silence for a while. It was already dark outside, and the temperature had dropped, making Hanako regret not bringing a jacket. She hugged herself and rubbed her arms. “Here,” Semi took off his coat and placed it over her shoulders. She was about to complain when the warmth wrapped her and she decided to leave her pride aside, “Thanks.” She put it on properly and zipped it all the way up, hiding part of her face with the collar.

Semi smiled softly and stared at her for a little too long, enjoying the image of Hanako in his jacket. Their eyes met for a brief second and they both looked away, suddenly finding the situation a bit more intimate than either of them had intended. “Is everything okay, Hanako?” He finally mustered the courage to ask her.

Hanako wanted to play it cool, but the sudden seriousness of Semi’s voice caught her off guard. Maybe the cold had weakened her defenses. Or maybe she was just tired. She was still upset with Ushijima, even if she couldn’t really understand why it bothered her so much. She was also upset at coach Yamatoya and at Washijo and at all these other things that weren’t okay and that she tried really hard not to think about precisely because everything was not okay. Far from it.

Semi’s hands around her arms brought her back to reality. He was standing in front of her, holding her by the sides and looking concerned. Without realizing it, she had stopped walking altogether. “Sorry, I… I don’t have a good excuse,” she laughed dryly.

“No, I’m sorry I asked. You were unusually quiet today and I got worried. But we don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” he gave her a reassuring smile as he rubbed her arms tenderly with his thumbs and she found herself genuinely enjoying the comforting gesture.

“I think I’m just homesick,” she admitted almost in a whisper. The rubbing motion on her arms stopped and she feared that he’d actually heard her. She was about to push him away, feeling embarrassed, when Semi brought her forward and embraced her. It took a few seconds to recover from the shock, but she returned the hug. She held onto him tightly, hiding her face against his chest.

After a few minutes, she let go of him, “Sor-”

“I don’t mind,” he interrupted her, “There nothing to be sorry for.” They were still quite close and Hanako had to bend her neck upwards to look at him. He was smiling and there was a subtle blush on his cheeks. His eyes glistened and the moonlight made his skin look like porcelain. Hanako had to fight the urge to stroke his cheek. She shook her head slightly, pushing the idea aside, and fixed her eyes on the pavement, not liking where her thought process was taking her, “We should get going,” she said.

“Yeah, it’s getting late,” he agreed.

Another long silence fell, except it wasn’t awkward this time. They made it to the dorm not long after and wished each other a good night. Hanako walked to her room feeling equally giggly and stupid.  

Chapter Text

When she arrived at the classroom that morning, she was not expecting to see Ushijima there. To say that it was early was an understatement, Hanako had made sure to arrive before everyone else so that she could return Semi’s jacket without any curious eyes noticing. She was not counting on golden boy being there. She sighed audibly as soon as she saw him, “Good God, do you wake up at 5 a.m.?”

He looked at her confused, “It’s ten to eight. Do you not have a watch?”

“I’m 17. Of course I don’t have a watch,” she placed her backpack on her chair and took out Semi’s jacket, carefully folding it, she left it neatly on his desk. She’d previously saved a little chocolate and a thank you note she’d scribbled on a torn piece of paper in one of the pockets, hoping he’d find it when she wasn’t around to be embarrassed by it. She turned to her desk and was met by a pair of confused olive eyes, “What are you doing with Semi’s jacket?”

“He lent it to me yesterday.”

“Were you cold?”

“That would be a good reason to borrow his jacket,” she sat turning her back to him, hoping that was the end of it. She crossed her arms on the table and rested her head against them, planning to use the few minutes left of quiet to rest a little. And for a moment, she accomplished just that. 

“Is that why you were upset yesterday?”

Hanako straightened up and rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands, finally she turned to him with a death glare, “Excuse me?”

“Last night, you seemed upset during practice. Was it because you were cold?”

“I’m sorry, was that inconvenient for you, golden boy?”

Annoyance flickered over Ushijima’s features, “Well, yes,” he said matter-of-factly, “You could’ve asked for my jacket if you were cold.” 

Between the lack of sleep and the general irritation Ushijima awoke in her, Hanako could’ve smacked him right across the face and not feel the tiniest bit sorry. The only thing that stopped her was that she didn’t think she could actually cause him any physical pain, so she’d had to make do with words, “I’d rather shoot myself in the foot, but thank you.” She turned around and laid on her desk again, not wanting to hear any more from the giant behind her.

Ushijima looked down at her even more confused than before, just like in the gym the night before, he couldn’t understand why she was mad. His eyes traveled to Semi’s desk, the jacket neatly folded waiting for him. It gave him a queasy feeling, one he didn’t enjoy at all. What was so different between his and his teammate’s jacket? Other than the size they were the same, so what was so unpleasant about his that Hanako would rather shoot herself than wear it?

“Earth to Wakatoshi,” a hand waving in front of him caught his attention, Tendo was giving him a funny look, brow raised as he spoke, “I can almost see the smoke coming out of your head, man. What are you thinking?” Ushijima’s eyes went to Hanako again, she hadn’t moved to greet their friend, and he wondered if she was asleep or just ignoring them. The redhead followed his gaze and, with a smirk adorned in his face, he said, “I see.”

A few of his classmates walked in, two girls whose names Ushijima couldn’t remember. Behind them, Semi and Reon were engaged in conversation as they headed to their respective desks. The blonde had to stifle a laugh when he saw Hanako, “Tough morning?” He asked no one in particular, making Reon and Tendo laugh.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen her have a good one,” said Tendo.

“I heard that,” Hanako’s voice came in a muffled, face still hidden between her arms and under her curly mane, but it was still easy to hear the irritation.

“Well, I didn’t intent to make it a secret.”

She rose slowly, her hands scrubbing her eyes and moving her hair away from her face, “Your voice is annoying in the morning,” Hanako pointed out.  She looked at Reon and Semi, who were still standing next to each other, watching the exchange, “Good morning,” she said to the two boys, trying to sound as kind as possible, only to turn to Tendo afterwards, sticking her tongue out. 

Finally, Semi took his eyes off her and went to sit. He was taking off his blazer when he saw the jacket. For a split second he stopped before sitting down. Hanako was able to see his face then, it was subtle, but she could tell he was smiling to himself. She looked away, not wanting anyone to notice her staring nor the blush that was creeping up her face.

It was a rare sight, Tendo couldn’t remember ever seeing his friend so frustrated. He’d spent the whole day frowning and sulking over nothing in particular and, although he remained civil and replied when he was spoken to, he barely made any effort to participate in conversation. Practice hadn't been any better and the fact that half his serves went out only added to the general grievance. But it definitely got worse during dinner. Tendo had a suspicion on what —or who— had caused it, but it was only confirmed then.

They were in the men’s dorms dinning hall, sitting at the table with Jin and Reon when Semi joined them. There was no need to ask him what had taken him so long, he had offered to walk Hanako to her dorm after she’d gotten mad at Tendo for a joke he made. Less than a minute later, Reon straightened up, brows knit together as he sniffed the air. His nose led him to Semi who leaned away from him at the invasion of his personal space, “Did you lose something?”

“You smell like a girl,” he exclaimed amused.

Semi’s cheeks went red almost immediately, “It’s call soap, you should use it once in a while.”

“No, it’s not,” he was grinning like a little kid who just learned his first bad word, “You smell like Hanako.”

“No way,” Jin stood up and walked towards Semi, “Let me see,” he leaned to smell him, but the boy pushed him away with his hand.

“Semi’s got a girlfriend,” Reon sang as he poked one of his cheeks teasingly. The blonde looked at him horrified and Jin took the opportunity to get closer to him, “You do smell like her!”

“Fine!” He conceded, hoping that would stop the boys, “I gave her my jacket and now it smells like her. That’s it, so just drop it,” he explained glaring at them. Jin and Reon exchanged looks before bursting out laughing.

“I don’t know why you get so worked up about it,” Jin went back to his seat and grabbed a spoon of rice and with a mouthful said, “We all know you like her.”

“Just ask her out,” Reon agreed.

“Worst case scenario,” Tendo intervened, “She says no, breaks your heart and completely damages your idea of self. That’s not too bad, is it?”

“Sure, thanks,” Semi said grudgingly.

“C’mon man,” Reon said whilst laughing, “He’s scared enough of her already, don’t make it worse.”

“You’re all being ridiculous,” Semi had his eyes fixed on his plate as he played with the food, “I don’t like her… Well, I mean, I do but not like that,” he sighed heavily, growing exhausted by the brain gymnastics he was doing, “I just like hanging out with her, that’s all.” He felt like he’d been credible enough, but when he looked up, he found all three of them covering their mouths to avoid laughing at him.

“Yeah, we can tell you don’t fancy her at all,” Tendo mocked, making Semi looked down at his plate again.

Reon was taking another bite at his food when he spoke, “What do you think, Ushijima?” The ace, who’d been radio silence up until that point, looked at him with a scowl and the boy regretted asking. Reon looked away and cleared his throat, ready to change the subject, when Ushijima answered, “Semi is right, Hanako is very agreeable.”

The blonde frowned to himself upon hearing him and dared look up, Ushijima was as stoic as ever, nothing was perceptibly different about him and yet he didn’t seem the same. A long silence fell on the table, although it went unnoticed to the ace who went back to eating. Maybe he was making a big deal out of nothing, Semi tried to convince himself, but judging by the way Tendo was looking at his friend he didn’t think so. Truth was he knew —as they all knew— he liked Hanako more than just a friend and he didn’t like the idea of Ushijima agreeing with him on that.

His mind went back to the day he’d seen them outside the boys’ dorm and how they were training yesterday. How many other times had they been together that he was unaware of?  But more importantly, why were they even together in the first place? He’d known Ushijima for years now and he’d never taken a second look at any girl before, not even the volleyball players earned a second look from him, so what was so different about Hanako that perked his interest?

Ushijima stood up, unaware of the silence that still lingered at the table, and wished them a good night before leaving for his room. Tendo followed close behind as he assessed his friend, he’d sensed his ill mood was related to Hanako but it still surprised him to confirm that. “I didn’t know you found Hanako very agreeable.” Ushijima hummed in acknowledgment but said nothing, “How so?” Tendo pressed and his friend looked at him confused. “I mean I think she’s hilarious and I really like her as a friend, but I doubt her sense of humor is appealing to you.”

“It’s not.”

“Right, that’s what I thought,” he waited a few seconds to see if his friend understood where he was going. He didn’t, “I was just wondering how you like her.”

Ushijima’s frown deepened and a minute went by before he answered, “I’m not sure.” He never understood any of her jokes nor her culinary choices, she was often rude, and her habits were ones he would never adopt himself. Her smile, the thought came to him without any warning. He really liked seeing her smile. When they raced each other and she proclaimed herself as the winner or when she was pleased with her breakfast or even when she mocked Tendo after avoiding one of his blocks during practice, he found himself not being annoyed by her mocking if it came along with a genuine smile.

Without realizing, he had stopped walking altogether and was now standing in the middle of the hall deep in thought. Tendo was a few steps ahead of him and had to turned to looked at him with curiosity breaming in his eyes, it was his voice that brought him back to reality and he resumed walking, “You know, the reason I’m asking is because I get the sense that you might like her in a way different than I do… In the way that sometimes boys like girls,” he pressed. Ushijima’s posture stiffened but his face gave nothing away. “It’s just a question, and I imagine I’m not the only one wondering, so I just thought I’d ask. But you don’t have to answer.”

The ace looked at him from the corner of his eye and said in a low voice, “You’re not making any sense.”

“I rarely do to you,” Tendo was grinning then, they were reaching Ushijima’s room and he could tell his friend was eager to get out of the conversation. “By the way, it’s ok if you like her. Although you might want to avoid saying things like how agreeable you find her in front of Semi,” the last bit he said in a more serious tone, causing the ace to stop for a moment, his hand holding onto the doorknob of his room. “Why?” Tendo shrugged, “Well, he kinda likes her too,” Ushijima made no attempt to correct him, “I don’t know if it’s just a crush he’s hoping will pass or whether he plans to do something about it, but he didn’t seem very happy about your comment at the table.”

“I see,” he answered after some consideration. With nothing else to say and not wanting to give Tendo the opportunity to keep talking about Hanako, he said goodbye and walked into his room, closing the door behind him.

The following Sunday, Hanako was nowhere to be found. Ushijima went through his circuit without ever crossing paths with her and, after noticing her absence, he spent the whole time wondering whether she hadn’t gone out running that day or if she’d just gone a different direction. Despite that, he was still hoping to keep the routine that had inadvertently settled between them. So, when he reached the coffee shop and saw she wasn’t there either, he grew somewhat worried. He pushed the feeling aside, they had no plans to meet, their encounters had always been coincidental, therefore he had no reason to expect her there that morning or any other. Still, it didn’t stop him from sitting at their table, glancing up whenever he heard the door open and growing anxious each time that she wasn’t there.

After breakfast, he hurried back to the school, went to his room to change and grab his backpack to head to the library. It wasn’t until he left the dorm that he realized Hanako might not be waiting for him. Was that part of their routine a coincidence too? She had given him homework, a few exercises for him to do during the week, and they were supposed to work on them during their meeting that Sunday. That was a plan. She had to be there.

When he reached the library, he was almost running. Without taking a second to compose himself, he walked in, the sudden irruption calling the attention of the librarian, and elderly woman who frowned at him over her glasses. But Ushijima took no notice of her disapproval, wasting no time to find their table, the one furthest from the entry, he sat, took out his notebooks and waited for Hanako. It was earlier than usual, maybe all the speeding from the coffee shop to the school and from the dorm to the library wasn’t the greatest idea. But he had no trouble waiting.

Ten minutes went by, then twenty. Then an hour flew by excruciatingly slow. And then she was late. He looked at the opened notebook in front of him, the exercise he hadn’t been able to finish was staring back at him. He closed it abruptly and put everything back into his backpack with harsh motions. Why was he wasting his time there? He should be training or resting, but not there. He left the library with the same urgency he had arrived.

On his way to the gym, he walked by the women’s dorm and came to a halt.  After a few minutes of hesitation, he decided to walk in. As soon as he did, a high pitch voice called him, “Toshi!” The cheerleader from his class stood in front of him smiling from ear to ear, “Do you need anything?” She asked eagerly and he tried to remember her name to address her properly but nothing came to mind, “I’m looking for Hanako,” he said simply. Her face contorted for a second before going back to the tight smile, “I don’t think I’ve seen her today, but whatever you need from her I’m sure I can help.”

“No, thank you. Do you know where Hanako’s room is?”

Unable to hide her disgust, she answered, “No idea, perhaps you can look for whichever room stinks,” Ushijima frowned and was about to point out that Hanako actually smell like vanilla, but a tap on his shoulder made him turn. The blonde girl from the volleyball team was standing behind him at the entrance, “Do you mind?” they were blocking the way. The cheerleader moved aside, leaving enough room for Shiori to walk past them, but Ushijima didn’t move an inch, “Do you know where Hanako’s room is?”

“Is she expecting you?” The question caught him off guard, he hesitated for a second and that was Shiori’ sing to leave. A moment passed before Ushijima took the determination to follow her, leaving the cheerleader too stunned to do something. “We were supposed to meet at the library,” he said once he reached Shiori. The girl laughed, “If you’re going to lie, you should at least think of a better excuse.” He paid no mind to the underlaying insult, “She’s helping me with school,” he insisted. Shiori stopped and exhaled almost exhausted to even be having this conversation, “Ok, I’m going to break this down for you because I can see you struggling,” she pointed a finger at him, “Either you’re lying or you were supposed to meet but she chose not to show up. Bottom line is she doesn’t want to see you and I don’t think is right to show you to her room if she’s ignoring you.” She turned around, thinking that was enough to put an end to the exchange, but this time Ushijima didn’t hesitate, “We’ve met every Sunday since school started, it’s not like her not to show.” Shiori looked at him through squinted eyes, arms folded in front of her as she seized him up, “You don’t even know my name, do you?”

“No,” he said simply, no trace of shame at the admission.

“Hmm,” she stared at him for a few more seconds. Finally, she made up her mind and turned around, heading to the staircase, “Fine,” she conceded. Ushijima followed her, until they stopped in front of a door with the number 13 on it, “If I ever see you perving around the dorm, I’m reporting you to the principal. Are we clear, super ace?” He nodded, although he wasn’t sure what she meant. Shiori went to the door next to Hanako’s and was about to enter her own room when she noticed Ushijima was just standing there, “You’re supposed to knock, champ.”

“I know,” he said irritated, noticing much to his dislike that the girl was getting on his nerves just like Hanako usually did. But still, he couldn’t bring himself to knock, the previous doubt coming back to him. Suddenly, he wasn’t sure why he was there. Already regretting her decision to let him pass, Shiori took matters into her own hands and knocked on the door three times, earning a glare from the ace. They waited but no one answered. Shiori was going to tell him to leave, assuming Hanako probably wasn’t there, but Ushijima got ahead and knocked on the door again, the sound louder and more urgent than before.

The door slammed opened, “What?” Hanako’s voice came out like a bark, taking them aback, but what was more surprising than her tone was her look, her eyes were bloodshot red and there were dark circles under them, she was wearing gym clothes, and her hair was up in what seemed like a rushed ponytail, with a few loose strands. When she saw Ushijima, the anger was replaced with curiosity, “Did you get lost, golden boy?” Under any other circumstances, Shiori would’ve laughed at the nickname, but seeing Hanako in such a disarray was off putting. She glanced at Ushijima and caught the hesitation in his moves as he took out a notebook from his bag, “I have some doubts about the exercises you gave me last week.”

“Oh,” Hanako said as she put two and two together. “Right,” she scratched the back of her neck, feeling self-aware all the sudden. “Sorry, I didn’t think you’d be waiting.” They stayed there awkwardly for a while, until Shiori spoke, “Well, I’d love to stay here in complete silence, but I have homework,” she pointed a finger at Ushijima, “I’m watching you, golden boy,” she entered the room next door then, leaving them alone and with Ushijima regretting having ask for her help in the first place.

As he looked at the door Shiori had gone through with a scowl, Hanako took the opportunity to glance at him more closely. He looked the same as always, which meant he looked great. Almost two meters of pride and composure. It annoyed her, especially now. Did he never have a day off? Did he never wake up hoping that the earth would swallow him whole? Probably not. “May I come in?” Ushijima’s voice brought her back to reality. She stared at him almost in disbelief, “I promise it won’t be long,” he added, hoping to convince her.

Hanako sighed, exhausted by his relentlessness. “Fine,” it was probably easier this way.